#in case someone might not want to see or hear about that idk

[gluevah]

Went to the mall yesterday with Jeremy to see IF, which was a really lovely film. It made me super emotional though, I was crying at parts where I didn't even know why! Definitely recommend going to see it though.

We went to the Squishable store, I was hoping they had the weevil and the rainbow caterpillar but they didn't. I did not leave empty-handed though; they had a sale going on and I had just gotten paid, which is a recipe for trouble.

I ended up getting these guys!

I immediately picked up the bone dragon when I first came in because the spooky ones always look like they need love. I love all the different kinds of textures he has! Long fluffy fur, and 2 different types of minky. He does not stand up by himself, bless his heart. He is very cuddly and I love his bone wings! His finger claws are flat but the feet ones are 3D plush claws. His teeth are soft, not made of felt, but the edges are a bit rough.

The strawberry crocodile is one I've wanted since it came out, the shape is very nice for hugging and the fur is so soft! The underbelly is long minky. I love his little teefs, he's just a baby 🥺 Also he matches my bed so well lol

I wanted to get the micro nurse for awhile but just hadn't gotten around to picking one up. I got Jeremy the plague doctor, and I wanted us to have matching ones! The caterpillar is so cute, and they didn't have the rainbow one, so I picked him to be another lil portable buddy!

While we were at the mall, Jeremy and I got our ears pierced c: I used to have mine done but they closed. Jeremy had been wanting to get his ear pierced for awhile, and we figured hey why not while we're here. I'll ask him if I can post a photo of him here Here's us with our new earrings c:

We held each other's hands while we got it done; he was nervous because he didn't know how it'd feel, I was nervous because of who I am as a person.

[flyingspicerack]

mm...

[mxrcurysb1tch]

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆‧₊˚ Astrology observations pt. VI˚₊☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊

✮ As always, take what resonates and leave the rest. xo

✮ Women with Venus in Leo want the red carpet rolled out for them in love. Give me the princess treatment, fly me to Paris, check us in at the Ritz, buy me designer, show me off. Men with Venus in Leo are pulling all the stops in love. They’re the ones splashing out, being extremely chivalrous. I know a guy with this placement and he’s usually super stingy but when his girlfriend is involved he makes sure she is treaaaateedd.

✮ I once read somewhere that mercury retrograde natives get really annoyed and frustrated when technological errors happen, when the WiFi is loading slow, when they don’t understand how something works on a computer etc. And idk about you guys but as a native myself, I can definitely relate lol!

✮ Speaking of mercury retrograde, I often find that when two natives meet each other, they either understand each other on a whole different level or they c o m p l e t e l y misunderstand each other and butt heads constantly and just generally get on each other’s nerves.

✮ 10h moons and being great musicians. I’ve noticed that a lot of musicians, especially ones that write their own songs have this placement and I think it’s because they’re so good at laying out the details of their lives in their songs and their emotions are a key component in the success of their career.

✮ *sigh* this is one I’m so tired of hearing. Capricorn isn’t just about being obsessed with money, materialism and capitalism. It’s about success, improvement, and mastery. Now I can see the overlap between the two ideas and the significations are definitely there for a reason. In our culture, the sign of success is having the money and the career, the house, so yes those things are likely to be attractive to a Capricorn. However it could just be about being successful and improving in any area of your life not just money and career.

✮ 6h stellium and/or moon might suffer from major health anxiety or intrusive thoughts, even OCD in extreme cases.

✮ Chiron 9h/sagittarius You might feel completely lost in life and like nothing has any meaning. You might have a confusing relationship with religion or be into nihilistic philosophies. Travelling and exploring the world can offer you a sense of purpose and meaning.

✮ Neptune aspects to personal planets can make a person feel very in tune with the psychic world and the energy of the collective unconscious. They might easily pick up on energetic shifts on a societal scale. The type of aspect will show how the native feels about this, what they choose to do with this ability and if it is a hindrance or help to them.

✮ Uranus aspects to personal planets can make the native very susceptible to understanding trends and behaviours in society. They may have a sixth sense predicting trends and people’s behaviours before they happen. I think this is especially prominent for those gen z that have Uranus in Pisces. Uranus aspects to personal planets can also make the native very ahead of their time, and they may propose extremely controversial or shocking ideas and observations that later turn out to be astute and extremely popular. With hard aspects, the native can struggle to harness this power for good and may rub people up the wrong way or even disgust them with their outlandish ideas. With more benefic aspects, the native can be seen as a visionary, someone to be revered and followed.

[delugyu]

hear me out on this, delusional bsf but it’s a whole other level, like he’s planning a wedding, has a ring hidden in his room and you’re introducing him to everyone as your friend but he’s so confused, like wdym friend? he buys you flowers every other day, you’ve kissed (like twice), isn’t that what what ppl do in a relationship?

happy valentine’s day! here’s some obsessed bff soobin as my gift to u <3

(wc: 2.6k / warnings: soobin is down tremendously bad and he’s kind of a perv, smut (mdni), oral (f rec), cumming untouched 🤓, idk if this counts as somno but ill tag it just in case)

Soobin thinks you must be misunderstanding your relationship. You keep telling people that he’s your friend, but that’s not how he feels at all. Soobin has taken care of you ever since he met you, he’s bought you thousands of dollars of gifts, he takes you out to nice restaurants, and he’s even tasted your lips once or twice. You’re pretty much dating at this point!

He’s left pouting beside you as he watches you ramble on and on to your friend about drinks and future plans and whatever else that gets filtered from his ears. Here he is, hand in hand with you, standing across from someone who’s supposed to think you’re just friends. The word suddenly feels like an insult, like it’s undermining the true nature of what’s happening between you two.

If you were to ask him, Soobin wouldn’t hesitate to call you his girlfriend. He spends his days counting down the time that has to pass before he sees you again. He dreams about what the family you build together one day might look like, how your daughter will have his eyes and your smile. He gets so caught up in the fantasy sometimes that he goes to jewelry stores just to browse through engagement rings that you’d like. He already bought two separate rings for you, keeping the little boxes tucked away in his nightstand until he’s finally ready to ask you.

He wants to sweep you off your feet and steal your heart from any other man. He hates it when you laugh at some other guy’s jokes, or if you even smile a little too brightly for someone else to see. It’s with a sense of shame that he swallows his jealousy down; he knows he shouldn’t be so upset when you still just see him as a friend. He also knows that he won’t speak up and stop you from introducing him as your friend—he’ll have to be content with his feelings being one-sided for now.

When he takes you back to your place, his eyes land on the vase of flowers you placed on your counter. Soobin notes that they’ve probably still got a few days of vibrancy left before he should buy you new ones. He stands with his hands held behind his back, still lingering by your door, waiting for you to tell him goodbye or ask him to stay.

His heart skips a beat when your hand lands on his shoulder. You have to tilt your head up when you're standing this close to him in order to look him in the eye, and something about that makes Soobin feel dizzy. He’s a gentleman, though, and he doesn’t let it cloud his mind too much. He has to remember that you’re like a fragile doll, and he can’t be such a wolf like all the other men are.

“Did you wanna stay with me tonight?” you ask, voice soft and sweet like it always is. His lips tilt up as he nods excitedly. He was hoping that you wouldn’t want him to leave.

He follows you into your bedroom, thanking you when you hand him some clothes to change into. He’s learned to leave some of his clothes at your place for nights like this. He heads to your bathroom so that you have enough privacy when you change out of your dress, always trying to be respectful and considerate of you.

He tries not to think too much about you slipping your dress off, how the material would pool at your feet and leave you in some cute lingerie set. He gulps as he takes off his jeans, looking up at the ceiling so he doesn’t imagine you kneeling on the floor in front of him. He changes into his sweatpants as quickly as he can, then throws on his shirt and shakes away the images haunting his brain. How dare he think such impure things of you? You’re so pretty and delicate, and he’s awful and disgusting to want to defile you.

He stares at himself in the mirror, standing in place for an extra minute just in case you need more time to get fully dressed. He wouldn’t want to walk in on you changing—the thought sends a shiver down his spine. You’d surely think he was a creep if you saw the things he thinks of.

When he finally comes back to your room, you’re already laying in bed, tucked comfortably underneath your blanket. He gets in bed beside you, waiting for you to cozy up to him. He looks at you expectantly, which makes you grin and throw yourself into his side. He laughs as you do so, letting his hand run through your hair.

You hum and lean into his chest. He prays you don’t feel how hard his heart is beating. He catches a glimpse of your hand, and his eyes linger on your ring finger. He wants so badly to fill the empty space there.

“Are you tired?” you ask him. He can hear the sleepiness in your voice. Like everything you do, that too makes him swoon.

“I’m not,” he says, keeping his voice quiet so as to not disturb your peace.

“Well I’m going to sleep,” you announce with a yawn. Soobin continues running his hand through your hair and down your back at a slow, steady pace, repeating the action to help lull you to sleep. He places the tiniest peck on the crown of your head and wishes you a good night.

Nothing makes Soobin happier than this. He has you all to himself, a moment that no one else gets to see or know about. It feels so domestic, like he’s already living in that faraway dream where you’re his wife and you love him dearly.

You stir in your sleep and let out a little hum. Soobin tries to be still and not wake you, but he also tries to not let your noises reach his cock. You emit another tiny moan, and he takes a deep breath to keep it from affecting him. He’s mentally scolding himself for being such a pervert, for being so turned on by things you have no clue you’re doing.

When you start moving around more, Soobin considers putting some space between you. You’re a light sleeper though, and he wouldn’t want to wake you up. That’s the only reason. Otherwise, he’s sure he would have nudged your leg off of him and given you some room. He’s a gentleman, and you’re a delicate flower.

Soobin gasps when he feels your hips cant against him. His face is burning, and he registers with an immense amount of shame that he’s getting hard now. Should he wake you up? Should he at least push your leg down a little? There’s a scarily small amount of space between his bulge and your thigh.

If only he were asleep. He wouldn’t be tortured by your jolting legs or your sleepy sounds of pleasure. You must be having a wet dream. God, Soobin might bust in his sweatpants right now. He needs some air, but he can’t get up.

He shouldn’t help you, right? Even if it would end the suffering for both of you… He can’t help but indulge in the idea a little. He imagines rolling over so he’s hovering above you, waking you up with a hundred kisses against your face and neck. You’d smile up at him so groggily when your eyes finally flutter open, wondering what your sweet best friend is doing.

Oh god, no, that’s perverted; Soobin can’t be thinking these kinds of things. He’s so hard he can’t stand it, and your soft moans leaving your lips aren’t helping him. He doesn’t want to embarrass you, but he can’t not get up now, at least to run to the bathroom and take care of his problem.

As soon as he sits up, he can tell that you’re stirring awake. His eyes widen, looking down at his side to see your sleepy eyes looking up at him. You’re so confused. It makes Soobin’s dick throb in his pants. Ugh. He hides his face in his hands.

“Soobin…” you mutter out, hand clutching onto his arm to drag him back down beside you. He gives in easily—he always does. He gulps when he looks at you, faces so close. You’re still tired, he can tell by your slow blinks. You’ll be falling asleep again fast.

You whine and tuck your face into his shoulder. Soobin shuts his eyes tight and uses all his might to not think with his dick.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, trying to keep his voice steady.

You don’t respond through your sleepy haze. He notes how hard you’re breathing. His head spins, wondering if you’re still horny. He wants nothing more than to help you out, so much that it fogs his mind and makes it hard to think straight.

Your thighs press together, and that’s when Soobin feels himself start to lose control. This is bad—he can’t do this to you. He’d be so sweet, though, he knows this. He’d touch you so gently and make sure you’re satisfied. He’d pull every noise he could out of you, cherishing each and every little twitch of your body. He needs you tremendously.

“A-are you…” Soobin starts, but can’t bring himself to finish the sentence. He’s already shaking so much from his self-restraint, you must be able to feel it.

Your leg brushes against his erection then, and the world comes to a standstill. Soobin doesn’t even breathe. He’s beyond mortified. You must think he’s a filthy piece of shit, he should’ve just taken himself to the bathroom, you probably hate him now.

“I’m sorry,” he’s rushing to say, sitting up again so he doesn’t have to poison you with his presence. “I’m so sorry, I promise I wasn’t”—

“Please touch me,” you say, cutting him off. Your eyes are so big and sparkly when you look up at him. His mouth is dropped open, not knowing if this is real or not.

“What?” he asks in a whisper, making sure he heard you right. If you said what he thinks you did, he might spill his load on the spot.

You bring a hand between your thighs, pathetically rutting against it. Soobin weakens at the sight, meeting your eyes and hoping to see some sort of desperation in them.

“Please, I need you. Woke up so wet,” you whine. Soobin moves as fast as he can between your legs. Every hope he had of taking things slow is thrown out the window—he’s far too needy to take his time with you. He’ll make sure to do it some other day.

“I’ll take care of you, don’t worry, I’m right here,” he rambles as he rids you of your shorts and panties. He holds your legs open, staring at your leaky pussy with awe. He feels himself short-circuiting. Is he dreaming? Is this moment finally happening? He has to make the most of this. He needs to make this perfect for you.

He kisses your hip bone then licks a stripe up your cunt, moaning as soon as his tongue meets you. He almost feels like he could cry. He’s waited so long, so patiently. You’ve finally broken, and you only want him to piece you back together. His cock is straining against his boxers, leaking profusely at the tip, but he ignores it completely to focus on you.

His tongue presses firm licks against your clit, then swipes quickly against it to get your legs trembling. He thinks it’s so cute how much you’re shaking already. You needed him to give you relief, he tells himself as he presses his face deeper into your cunt, so he has to make sure he delivers. Your cries motivate him to keep going, it has him obsessing over how much pleasure he can provide you.

His tongue moves down to your fluttering entrance, and his stomach clenches when he realizes how empty you must feel. His poor baby, he’ll help you out. He stuffs his tongue inside you, making sure his nose stays pressed against your clit. He moans at your taste and the way you tighten around his tongue. He licks and laps at you as much as he can, determined to get his fill of your arousal.

Soobin can’t help it when he starts fucking the mattress, hips moving on their own accord. Your own hips are grinding down on his face now, and he knows now what true desperation feels like. No other feeling has he experienced so strongly as the need to have you cumming on his tongue. You flood all of his thoughts and his senses, he’s completely devoted to getting you off and making you happy.

“Soobin! Hnng—I’m..!” You don’t have to finish your sentence, Soobin knows. He feels you tightening over his muscle, which he continues to fuck into your hole with as much vigor as he possesses. He pants against your cunt, so ready for you to fall over the edge, going insane to know what it feels like to have you fall apart because of him.

You cum with a whine, body twitching all over as your orgasm hits you. This is the moment Soobin has waited for, and it’s beyond anything he could have imagined. He’s spilling in his sweatpants the moment your thighs close around his head. His hips stutter against the mattress as his seed bursts out of him. This is the best moment of his life.

He commits it all to memory: your breathy, whiny noises and the shake in your legs. The way your breath hitches and how your walls feel clamping down on his tongue. You’re so tight, he can’t imagine how he’ll ever fit his cock inside you. He’ll never be the same after this.

Your hand tugs at his hair to pull him away, and he obliges. He looks at how wet you are now, a mixture of his saliva and your arousal pooling at your center and down your thighs. His eyes almost roll back, he can’t believe you finally let him take care of you like this. He’ll touch himself for the rest of his life remembering this moment.

Your smile is just as gorgeous and heart-stopping as it always has been when you pull him up to you. He collapses on top of you as he regains his breath. He presses kisses against your collarbones, wanting to make sure you feel cared for.

“Thank you, Soobin,” you say, wrapping your arms around him. He feels like he should be the one thanking you. You’re amazing.

“Please be my girlfriend,” he blurts out before he can even think of stopping himself. He can’t imagine not being able to do this with you again. He’s not sure what even gave you the courage to ask him to do this, but he needs you to keep letting him have you.

You giggle, and it nearly makes Soobin’s heart explode. “I was wondering when you were gonna ask me that,” you say, holding his face up so he’s looking you in the eye.

Soobin’s dumbfounded. He feels everything at once. He’s ecstatic that you didn’t reject him. He’s dizzy from the love burning his body up. He’s regretful that he didn’t ask you sooner.

“I’m in love with you.” He decides that if it’s time for him to get everything off his chest, he might as well say that part too. You press a quick kiss to his lips, and he has to keep himself from passing out.

“I love you too,” you say, smiling so dreamily and brushing his hair back.

Oh god. Soobin might just cum untouched again.

[cece693]

could I maybe request something for a male reader and hannigram? something where the reader is always really quiet and generally avoids people so everyone thinks he’s shy, but one conversation with him shows that he is NOT shy—he’s just on the verge of murdering someone constantly. ‘Never plan a murder out loud’ type shit

so idk like quiet, anger issues-y type of reader? anyways thanks :3

On the Tip of Your Tongue

pairing: hannigram x male reader tags: reader isn't who he seems, hannigram is supportive, no murder today, short but sweet, kinda au

You’ve always been the quiet type—or at least, that’s what everyone thinks. You’re the coworker who slips in and out of the office with barely a nod in passing. The neighbor who’s so hard to catch in conversation that people decide you must be shy or painfully introverted. After all, you rarely speak unless spoken to, and even then, it’s usually just a few carefully chosen words.

But Hannibal Lecter and Will Graham know better.

They see the way your eyes linger a second too long on potential threats. They hear the deliberate pace of your breathing when you’d rather lash out than listen to unwelcome commentary. They’ve witnessed how your fists tighten and then relax at your sides, an exercise in self-control so you don’t do something you’d regret—or maybe something you’ve been itching to do all day.

No one suspects that you’re coiled tight like a predator, mentally skirting the edge of violence at every sharp word or rude glance. Well, no one besides your boyfriends.

You live with Will and Hannibal in a large, old house on the outskirts of Baltimore. It’s tastefully furnished—Hannibal’s touch, of course—with warm wooden floors and richly colored walls. Tucked into a corner near the fireplace is a battered armchair that’s Will’s favorite spot. When you get home from work tonight, you find Will curled up there, jacket tossed over the chair’s arm, while Hannibal stands by the mantle, hands clasped behind his back.

“There you are,” Will says, sounding relieved. “Busy day?”

You loosen your tie with a quick tug and hang it over the coat rack. “Something like that.”

“‘Something like that’?” Hannibal repeats with a faint tilt of his head. He steps forward, curiosity sparkling in his eyes. “It’s rare you come home so tense.”

You offer him a crooked half-smile. “I had a run-in at work.”

Will sits up straighter, frowning. “Everything okay?”

“Nothing I couldn’t handle,” you say, your voice low. You’re aware, in that moment, that anyone else would have shrugged it off with a polite, noncommittal phrase. But you don’t bother hiding the edge in your tone. Not in front of these two men. “Let’s just say I gave someone a wake-up call.”

It’s Will’s turn to smile, the corner of his mouth quirking with interest. “I’m guessing there’s more to the story than that.”

You shrug. “Maybe a bit.”

Earlier That Day

You work at a forensic consulting office attached to the FBI. You’re not a profiler—Will’s got that covered, and so does Hannibal, in his own capacity—but your role is instrumental. You file case reports, cross-reference data, catalog evidence, and do some background research that often proves vital. It’s not glamorous, but you do it well. Quiet competence, that’s your calling card. Nobody expects the seemingly shy, unassuming coworker to have sharp claws.

Apparently, Joseph Sykes in the archives department was in the mood to push buttons today. He’d made an offhand remark about your “lack of communication skills,” implying you were borderline useless in a high-stakes environment. Maybe if you were more gregarious, you’d climb the ladder faster.

You could practically feel your temper thrumming. There’s a little tingle in your fingertips, that familiar rush of heat across your temples. The darkness that’s always lurking on the edges of your mind wanted to creep in, to let you imagine just how easy it might be to…

No. Not here. You repeated the same mantra you always do. Never plan a murder out loud, and never lose your cool so publicly.

Instead, you turned to face him slowly. You allowed the silence to stretch until Joseph got a little uncomfortable, shifting his weight from foot to foot. When you finally spoke, your voice was quiet enough that only he could hear, but laced with a menace that forced him to pay attention.

“Joseph,” you said, leaning in slightly, “I don’t need to be loud to get results. If you want to see me really speak up, keep trying to push me.”

His expression froze as he realized that, beneath the polite exterior, something lethal flickered behind your eyes. You gave him a small, dangerous smile, then calmly walked away. He was left standing there, mouth slightly open, unsure of what to say.

Back Home

Will’s eyebrows lift as you finish recounting the incident. “You put him in his place without even raising your voice?”

“Didn’t have to.” You shrug, crossing the room to where Hannibal stands. He places a hand lightly on your shoulder, warmth radiating through his long fingers.

“We all have our own ways of asserting dominance,” Hannibal murmurs, a private amusement in his tone. “I’m glad you didn’t escalate things. Though, one day, perhaps you’ll indulge me and share how you control that hunger.” His eyes flick over yours, curious and admiring.

“I don’t know if you’re the last person who should be encouraging that or the best person,” you tease. “But it’s not about control so much as picking the right moment. I’m not going to waste my time or energy on something that small.”

Will stands, padding softly over to the two of you. “That’s what I love about you,” he says. “Everyone thinks you’re just quiet and shy, but the reality is far more interesting. You’ve got more bite in you than half the people at the Bureau combined.”

You offer a wry smile, stepping closer so that Will can take your hand, and Hannibal, your other. “There’s a lot they don’t know, that’s for sure.”

A small silence settles over the three of you—comfortable, warm. Even with your smoldering anger from earlier, you can’t help but feel at peace here. In their presence, your edges don’t feel quite so sharp. There’s an understanding that hums beneath the surface; you don’t need to watch your every word or apologize for the way your thoughts naturally veer. Will and Hannibal know who you are in your quiet moments and in the moments where the darkness tries to seep out from behind your eyes.

And they accept you, entirely.

Later that night, you’re in the kitchen with Hannibal. He’s slicing vegetables for a late dinner, and the rhythmic sound of the knife against the cutting board is almost hypnotic. You lean against the counter, arms crossed, watching him with a lazy sort of fascination.

Without looking away from his task, Hannibal speaks up. “There’s a question on your mind.”

You exhale slowly, pushing off the counter to stand at his side. “I’m not sure it’s a question so much as an observation. Everyone at work still thinks I’m meek. Even after all this time. When someone like Sykes decides to test me…some part of me wants to prove them wrong in a very, very final way.”

Hannibal’s lips curl into that refined, knowing smile. “The instincts we share can be…difficult to restrain. But you have an advantage: clarity. You know when to yield, and you know when to stand your ground. That’s more power than you realize.”

He sets the knife down and meets your gaze, eyes dark with a fond, predatory glint. “And perhaps you enjoy having them underestimate you.”

Will appears in the doorway then, shoulders relaxed. “Dinner almost ready?” he asks lightly, though he picks up on the electricity in the air. His gaze dances between you and Hannibal, reflecting his quiet understanding of the unspoken tension you both carry.

“Almost,” Hannibal replies, returning to his slicing.

Will moves close enough to rest a hand on your lower back. “And you? You alright now?” His tone is gentle.

You let out a tight breath and allow yourself to lean into his touch, if only a little. “I’m fine.” Your voice drops, turning wry. “Calmer than I was earlier, anyway.”

“Glad to hear it,” Will says. He presses a light kiss just behind your ear. It’s casual affection, but it’s enough to smooth out the last of your lingering frustration.

You smile, truly smile, for the first time that evening. Because this moment—this comfortable, domestic moment with Hannibal and Will—is what keeps you anchored. You can keep your secrets and your darkness close, but never alone. You can unleash your quieter, deadlier side at will, knowing they won’t turn away from you. If anything, it only draws you closer.

[formulaonecrumbs]

just wish i was older

Lando Norris x babysitter!reader

summary: lando has a crush on his babysitter.

warnings: age gap? not really tho. it’s 3 years. lando pining for a girl he can’t have.

A/N: idk if this is weird. cuz reading it back i think it might be 😭😭 did reader groom him? no but why does it feel it. i’m going crazy also a gif this time cause i have a thing for rookie lando :]

୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ

age 12 & 15

lando had crossed his arms and sat sulking on the living room couch like the world had personally offended him.

his hair was still a little messy from the argument with his mum earlier, and his tie—he’d refused to take it off—was hanging half-untied around his neck like a silent protest.

you smiled as you closed the front door behind you. “you look like a grumpy little businessman.”

lando glared at you. “i’m not little.”

“right,” you teased, dropping your bag on the floor. “you’re a very mature twelve-year-old who threw a tantrum because he didn’t want to go to a wedding.”

his cheeks flushed slightly. “i didn’t throw a tantrum.”

“you did,” you grinned, walking past him into the kitchen. “your mum told me. said you nearly cried when she made you put on the dress shoes.”

“they pinch,” he muttered, following you like a shadow.

you pulled open the fridge. “alright, rebel. what are we eating tonight?”

lando leaned on the counter, watching you. “can we have those frozen pizzas?”

“already trying to sweet-talk me into junk food, huh?” you raised an eyebrow. “what happened to please and thank you?”

he rolled his eyes dramatically. “pleeease.”

you tossed him a frozen pizza box. “get the oven started, mr. businessman.”

he smiled, and you caught the way his shoulders relaxed a little.

later that evening, after pizza and a movie he picked (some racing documentary, no surprise there), the two of you sat on the floor of the living room, surrounded by empty snack wrappers.

“you’re not like other babysitters,” lando said suddenly, his voice quiet.

you looked over at him, one eyebrow raised. “yeah? how so?”

he shrugged, tugging at a loose thread in the carpet. “you talk to me like… normal. not like i’m a dumb kid.”

you softened. “you’re not a dumb kid, lando.”

he didn’t say anything for a second. then, almost too softly to hear, “i like it when you come over.”

you smiled. “i like it too. you’re good company, even when you’re being a grump.”

he smiled, just barely. “you’re nice.”

“so are you.”

he looked away quickly, cheeks pink again.

by the time his parents got home, lando was half-asleep on the couch, his head tipped against your shoulder.

you’d left the lights low and the tv still playing quietly in the background, the empty pizza box folded neatly on the table.

his mum smiled when she walked in. “looks like he survived without us.”

you nodded, brushing his curls back gently from his face. “barely.”

lando blinked sleepily, mumbling something about not being tired, but he didn’t move from your side.

and as you got up to leave, promising to see him again soon, he looked up at you with those tired eyes and whispered, “you’ll still come even when i’m older, right?”

you smiled, ruffling his hair. “if you want me to.”

he nodded once, like that answer settled something big in his heart.

and long after you were gone, he stayed sitting on the couch, tie still loose, wondering how long it’d take to be old enough for someone like you to really notice him.

୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ

age 15 & 18

lando hadn’t needed a babysitter in over a year.

or so he said.

but when his parents had to go out last-minute and asked you to drop by—“just in case, he won’t admit he wants the company, but you know how he is”—you’d agreed without hesitation.

he opened the door like he hadn’t been pacing behind it for the past ten minutes.

“you didn’t have to come,” he said, voice deeper now, posture more guarded. “i’m not twelve.”

“good thing,” you said, stepping inside with a smile. “because you were so annoying at twelve.”

he cracked a smile despite himself. “rude.”

you looked around the house. it was cleaner than usual. like maybe he’d tried to make it look like he had it together. “so what’s the plan? you gonna ignore me the whole time, pretend i’m not here?”

“nah,” he shrugged. “you can stay if you want.”

“lucky me.”

you ended up sitting in the kitchen while he made tea—something he insisted on doing himself, like he had something to prove.

“you’re in uni now, right?” he asked, carefully pouring boiling water into mugs. “like properly moved out and everything?”

“yeah,” you nodded. “first year.”

“right.” he paused, fiddling with the teabag. “bet that’s nice.”

you tilted your head. “what is?”

“being around people your age,” he muttered. “grown-ups.”

you blinked. “you say that like you’re ancient.”

he didn’t laugh. just looked at you, eyes a little more serious than usual. “you used to treat me like a kid.”

“you were a kid.”

“and now?”

you held his gaze for a second before giving a small smile. “still kinda a kid.”

he looked away, jaw tightening. “figured.”

later, while a show played quietly in the background, he sat on the other end of the couch, leg bouncing, fingers tapping against his knee.

you glanced over. “lando?”

he didn’t look at you. “do you ever think about how weird it is that i’ve known you half my life?”

“not weird,” you said gently. “just… kind of sweet.”

he scoffed, but it didn’t sound mean. “you used to tie my shoes. now you’re off dating guys with cars and jobs and… real lives.”

“you jealous?”

he looked at you then. properly. “you know i am.”

the silence stretched, soft and full of something unspoken.

you reached over, nudging his arm. “i promise i’m not going to disappear, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

his expression cracked for a second—just long enough to see the boy underneath, the one who used to cling to you like a shadow.

“i’m not,” he muttered. “just wish i was older.”

you smiled, eyes kind. “one day, you will be. and you’re gonna be someone really great.”

he didn’t answer. just nodded, lips pressed into a thin line, fighting a war between wanting to be grown and knowing he’s still got time to go.

and when he walked you to the door that night—holding it open like a gentleman, pretending not to watch you as you left—he didn’t say goodbye.

just: “thanks for coming.”

and in his chest, a soft ache that had nothing to do with being young…

and everything to do with how much he wished he wasn’t.

୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ ୨ৎ

age 16 & 19

you weren’t supposed to be back.

you were home from uni for a weekend, barely enough time to breathe—let alone babysit—but when mrs. norris called in a panic asking if you could check in on lando “just for a couple hours while we’re out”, you didn’t even think twice.

you hadn’t seen him in nearly a year.

he opened the door and for a second, you didn’t recognize him.

he was a little taller now. voice deeper. shoulders broader.

but the look in his eyes—that familiar flash of something warm and too intense—was exactly the same.

“…hey,” he said, voice unsure.

“hey,” you echoed, stepping inside. “you got… taller.”

he smirked. “you got older.”

you rolled your eyes. “rude.”

you sat in the living room, both pretending this wasn’t weird.

“you’ve barely texted me this year,” he said suddenly, not looking at you.

“you stopped texting first,” you replied gently.

he went quiet.

“thought maybe you didn’t want to talk to me anymore,” you added, softer now.

“i did.” he leaned back into the couch. “i just… figured you were busy. with adult stuff.”

you smiled, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes. “doesn’t mean i forgot about you.”

his jaw clenched. “well, i didn’t forget you either.”

he made tea again. of course he did. but this time, he brought it to you like it was a date.

he sat across from you, legs bouncing, hoodie sleeves pushed up.

“you still dating that guy?” he asked, voice low.

you shook your head. “not anymore.”

he looked up fast, too fast. “…oh.”

“why?”

you shrugged. “wasn’t right.”

he paused, chewing on his lip like he wanted to say something—something big, something too much—but instead, he just said, “he was lucky.”

you blinked. “lando…”

“i know,” he said quickly, like he could read your mind. “i know it doesn’t mean anything. just… let me say it, alright?”

you nodded.

“i like you,” he said. “i’ve liked you. for a long time.”

you stayed quiet.

“i know you’re older. i know nothing can happen. but you were the first person who really saw me. who didn’t treat me like a dumb kid.”

you swallowed. “you’re not a kid anymore.”

he laughed, but there was no humor in it. “still feels like i am to you.”

“lando—”

“it’s okay,” he said, getting up. “you don’t have to say anything. i just wanted you to know. in case… i don’t know. in case you ever wondered.”

you watched him as he walked into the kitchen, shoulders tense, trying to be calm when his heart was beating out of his chest.

and you sat there, staring into your tea, knowing he was right.

it wasn’t the time.

it never could be.

THE END :>

[signanothername]

I just got the idea of like, Killer's SOUL being able to hypnotize, if only briefly- idk I thought you'd enjoy this idea

Oooh I absolutely do enjoy this idea omg

And I can actually see it happening ngl, the way his soul seems to gently and continuously move, I can see it happening on stage 2 specifically but never any other stage, cause his soul moves too aggressively on stages 3 and 4 and is almost completely still on stage 1 (and I like to think any movement it has on stage one resembles the beat of a heart)

Stage 2 tho? His soul moves in a gentle slow circular motion, and I feel like if someone does look at at for a bit, it would cause them to completely lose their sense of reality around them

There’s this one comic, in which Swap Chara, immediately noticed and felt Killer’s soul, and was even in pain cause of it, this is obviously cause they’re Chara, different universe or not, that bond will always be there, but what I find most fun about it, is the fact Chara felt the intent, felt the danger from Killer way before meeting him in person, without even realizing that this is Killer’s soul at first until they felt it, not only that, but how they say it, “his soul. His mind.” They felt his mind, *shakes you*, they felt his mind

Not only that, but the panel with his soul’s light, lighting up his chest, it feels like an aura of its own of sorts, and it makes sense for his soul to have an aura, even for a small range

And it makes me wonder if people hypnotized by his soul would feel the danger and intent too, would know they’re in danger but can’t do anything to prevent it

Also can you imagine whoever gets hypnotized maybe could end up hearing and listening to what Killer hears on a daily basis? The laughter, the comments, the endless overlapping voices, not that Killer is aware of them getting a glimpse into his mind (otherwise he’d make sure they never get hypnotized shgdgd)

it’d be really fun if it’s unintentional even, and only happens for a few minutes tops, it’s just happens and Killer picks up on it after a few times, on how in certain circumstances his soul can hypnotize people briefly, and Killer takes advantage of it, says some creepy shit about how they should just focus on his voice and let themselves go

Like I can see Killer brushing it off the first time it happens, he notices, he’s intrigued, but the person snaps back to reality before Killer is sure, and Killer just brushes it off as his mind making things up, then it happens again, and a third time, and so he’s sure now, and he just takes advantage of it, especially when he needs info

He might even trick someone into observing his soul when he wants to hypnotize them, hold it gently and talk about it, show it to them, etc (even when I think that Killer usually would rather no one focuses on his soul much)

Not that he needs to most of the time, as people who never met him before would immediately take notice of it, cause not everyone has their soul out in the open like that, but people who already know him might not look at his soul cause they already know of it, it’s not news to them, so Killer takes steps to make them fall into hypnosis

I like to think that if this is truly the case, it only works on certain people than others, not everyone gets hypnotized, not necessarily because they’re immune, but because either the person feels themselves getting hypnotized way before they actually do and so they opt to not look at Killer’s soul directly, or maybe they are truly immune for whatever reason, either way, really fun :)

[leashybebes]

Idk, maybe it is a little odd but "♟: Patching up a wound", if you want :)

may i offer you a little superhero au in these trying times? don't blame me, blame lou's goddamn superman jawline

"Buck, I'm sending someone to your apartment," Athena says, with no preamble.

"Uh…what? Who?"

"Don't ask questions. He needs stitches."

"He needs stitches? Shouldn't you send him to Hen or Chim or - or a hospital?"

"What did I just say about asking questions? Hen and Chimney aren't options. He should be with you in fifteen minutes. He'll have equipment, but get your first aid kit just in case."

"Wait, Athena - "

"Bye, Buck."

The night is as dark and quiet as it ever gets in downtown LA. Buck paces up and down the loft a couple of times, never straying far from the front door. Which is why he doesn't hear anything to give him any warning before there's a single, loud thump from the balcony, followed by a groan that's audible even through the closed glass.

By the time he gets to the door, a figure is pulling itself to its feet, using Buck's outdoor furniture for help.

What the fuck, Buck thinks, but opens the door anyway.

"Athena send you?" he checks.

"A lot of men fall from the roof onto your balcony?" A deep voice asks, sounding pained. What the hell has Athena gotten him into?

"Fair," Buck says, and hurries to get one shoulder under the guy's arm, hauling him further upright and helping him stagger inside.

In the light of the loft, he can see that the guy has some kind of cowl covering most of his face, just a strong jaw where a bruise is starting to blossom and a cleft chin and a pair of pink lips set into a firm line. The cowl is the same dark blue as the rest of his outfit which is some kind of…jumpsuit maybe, with flashes of silver at the wrists and - hooooooly shit.

"Holy shit," Buck breathes, unable to help himself. "You're The Pilot!"

"No autographs, kid."

"Athena hates you!"

"Sergeant Grant and I have a complicated professional relationship," The Pilot says, while Buck bites back approximately a million questions. "She said you would be able to help."

"I mean - I haven't actually given anyone stitches before," Buck admits. "But I've watched Hen and Chim - I work with them, they're paramedics - I've watched them do it like a hundred times. I don't know why Athena didn't send you to one of them…" he says, fishing a little.

"Long story," The Pilot says, and Buck helps him get seated on one of the kitchen stools. "You were closer."

"Okay," Buck says. "What's the damage?"

"Knife got through a couple of plates in the suit."

"Wait, this thing is armor plated? That's so cool!"

"Glad you approve. Here." The Pilot pulls at a previously invisible join in his suit, revealing a long gash across his ribs. It's bleeding sluggishly, not too deep, but the skin around it is angrily red.

"That might get infected," Buck says, chewing his lip.

"Need you to clean it. Please."

"Okay," Buck says. "Do you want some water?"

"That…would be great, actually."

He drinks from the glass of water Buck hands him while Buck works on cleaning the wound. He tries his best to be gentle but the guy doesn't even flinch. Which, of course he doesn't. He's a literal superhero. There is a literal superhero in Buck's loft and he can't help it anymore.

"I've seen you before," he says. "On scenes. I'm a firefighter."

"I know."

"Athena, right, of course." Buck washes his hands again and gets what he needs from the first aid kit.

"Before we get started, can I ask you a question?"

The Pilot shrugs. "You can ask."

Buck takes a deep breath. "Where do you get your suits? And why do you do this? And can you really fly? And what's your real name?"

Through the gap in the cowl, pretty blue eyes blink at him. "That wasn't a question. I can't tell you where I get the suits or what my real name is. I can fly light aircraft and helicopters but I can't fly fly. And I do this because people need help, and I can help."

"That's so cool. My name's Evan Buckley, by the way."

"Hi, Evan Buckley." The Pilot's lips curve into a smile for the first time. "Great to meet you. Now can you stitch me up before I bleed on your floor?"

[ghostgirl101]

Poppy Playtime Bigger Bodies (Antagonists) x You || General HCS

...if you were an orphan left mysteriously alive in the factory.

A/N: Aka you being protected by every bigger body brother sister significant mother huggable plush dog cat dough boy in the factory. 😀 also random note but I'd love to hear theories about chapter 5 coming out next year, I'm already ready for it lol, I think I heard its gonna be the last and there's gonna be multiple endings and I'm 100% down for all of it

Sidenote: These headcanons aren't gonna be massively romantic or anything just because they're trapped childrennnnn in animal plush forrrrms and idk writing that ifykwimeaaannn 😺someone freakier than me might attempt to tho lmao also I didn't manage to include Ms Delight in this one, I'm sorry, but girl gave me nightmares for a straight week 😭

CATNAP?

🐾 • Basically never says a word. Kitty's always staring in the back with those big, blank white eyes and gaping grin, looming over everything, lurking in red shadows. Don't think he's not always watching you, because he is. Everywhere. Anywhere. He knows.

🐾 • If you happened to know Catnap before "Catnap" and as Theodore Grambell, there are just two things to know. Don't ever call him by his real name. And don't ever leave him.

🐾 • Cat might actually, very, very slightly be tempted to question the almighty Prototype's intentions if and when he ever demands Catnap fetch you for them for a "discussion of sorts."

🐾 • Get used to being flung up onto his back at random points of the day or night to stalk around the factory levels with him. And also get used to the red mist, because if he thinks you need sleep, then you're gonna get sleep.

🐾 • He'll only stop when he realises that you get the nightmares too. That's how you'll know he cares. In his own ways.

🐾 • And if The Player tries to interact or find you in the factory, Catnap will actually scrap his love for a cat and mouse game with them, and go straight for the kill. And there's no death screen for this one.

🐾 • He's pobably one of the most protective out of all the Bigger Bodies surrounding you in Playtime factory. He won't let you go anywhere near the train, or the main ground floor where the entrance and exit are. It's been bolted and secured by The Prototype itself, and Huggy's another willing blockade to any attempted escapes.

🐾 • I'm rambling about the others now, so let's move on to them-

DOEY?

🍭 • Let me first state (for the very obvious fact, but in case you didn't know lol) that Doey the Doughman is infact multiple mans. Three. And more boys than men- we have Kevin, the "problem child" that has an uncontrolled temper, glaring scowl on his features, and the loudest voice. We've got poor Jack, the victim of falling into literal molten dough as a child, who just wants his mum and brings out the pure blue sadness in the mix. And Matt just tries to keep everyone together as a "dream child," being the most thoughtful and caring of the bunch. So that's that.

🍭 • I feel like out of all of them, Jack would barely say a word, probably still completely traumatised by everything and numbed in pain mentally and physically to end up like a bit of a blank, unresponsive slate. But if you give him time, and maybe a few hugs, he'll soften out of his shell in his own way, and will naturally just follow after you wherever and whenever he can in the factory, even giving the other boys a bit of a tug in your direction when they're fighting for control.

🍭 • Kevin wouldn't give the boys a tug, he would physically lunge and shove against Matt's gentleness to do as he wanted, or to speak to you himself. It would be a miracle for anyone to calm him down, and if it's not Matt getting in at just the right time, it'd be you.

🍭 • Matt's a complete gentle giant in every way, and so you and he would be a dream team in helping keep up the safe haven and a sense of order amongst the others. You'd probably see him asking you for guidance and leadership after a little while too, after he's done it almost completely alone up to this point.

🍭 • All three of them would gang up in an instant to defend or protect you, no questions asked, working in perfect harmony. Just like how brutal the fight with The Player ended up being, but heightened to an extreme, because here, there's no mental or physical conflict in their motives, there's just the raw instinct of protecting their own.

HUGGY?

🧸 • Big surprise - or maybe not - that he's probably one of the softest of the bunch when it comes to you and your protection. He would absolutely steal Catnap's move of just randomly scooping you up to wander around or play in the Game Station, except you'd be carried around on his shoulder for most of the time.

🧸 • He'll play whatever game you want with you, when he's not on surveillance for intruders. Tag or It can be mildly stressful with him though, just because, he will absolutely chase the hell after you until he's knocked you off your balance and into the air- "Huggy it's just a game 😭"

🧸 • The Prototype put Huggy Wuggy in charge of securing the main entrance and level of the factory, and so he takes it completely seriously. If The Player's on the hunt to find you, they'll have to get through Huggy first. He'll be raging, screeching the whole end scene of Chapter 4, because he saw you talk to The Player.

🧸 • Very much like a golden retriever one moment and then a guard dog with snapping teeth and dead eyes the next.

MOMMY LONG LEGS?

💗ྀི • This woman is INSANE 😭 😭 like whattt girl calm down just cus Catnap was giving us a ride around the Navigation Room we aren't gonna fall off and "smash into tiny bloodied pieces," if you keep poking at the Cat he's actually going to twist one of your pink arms off-

💗ྀི • Very protective. Insanely, 24/7, obsessively so. Every other child left her to die but one, so if you go anywhere near the main ground floor or the train, get ready for a momentary mental collapse until The Prototype itself has to threaten her nerves to get her to back off a bit

💗ྀི • She can actually be a nice presence to be around if you're missing your parents or family or anything you had to give up to live in hell underground, because she's motherly to the max and will treat you like you're four and can't do anything for yourself even though you most certainly are not four, and haven't been for some time

💗ྀི • Anyone she doesn't think is protecting and watchiing over you enough on the rare occasions that you're out of her reach is gonna risk being webbed up as a corpse somewhere around the factory, just as a warning sign. She has to teach her lessons, after all.

HARLEY SAWYER?

👁️ • This guy's an absolute bitch. In every way possible.

👁️ • He'll keep you around, not because The Prototype commands it, but either because you're either (1) his child somehow - my condolences to you to have a dad who's basically the monsters inc eye in a box - or (2) you were an interesting and possible subject choice for a future test that never saw the light of day before the Hour Of Joy.

👁️ • He just has a weird obsession with you in some way, though not as strongly as The Prototype's mentality. Harley's still a psychopathic ass, so don't expect much soft treatment. Just a lot of eyes on the old, broken-down security cameras in the factory and a snarky remark whenever you come to check on him in the Doctor's Lair.

👁️ • It'd give him all the more reason to dissect The Player if he found they were trying to reach you somehow. "After my orphan, I see. How inspired. You'll save no one."

THE PROTOTYPE?

⚠︎ • The most protective 101/100 out of every single being left alive in the factory. It just goes about things in a different, "creative" way.

⚠︎ • Low-key borderline obsessed with everything about you and everything you represent in their mind. Whatever they're planning, it's for you. Poppy who?

⚠︎ • All the Bigger Bodies under his control have the sole job to follow him blindly, and to make sure you stay alive, unharmed, fed and watered, and nowhere near the exit. You're not going anywhere. Playtime birthed you, Playtime is you.

⚠︎ • It'll go after The Player in its own ways. Using Catnap and Mommy and Huggy and everyone else to beat them down, and then get The Player to watch the inevitable. That's what makes it sweet. "It's not about you."

⚠︎ • Not very soft or sweet at all, because... It's The Prototype. But it can take on many acts, like it did with Ollie, and you might've gone through the whole thing of thinking you were friends with someone else hidden in the factory that tells you they're always here for you, they love you, you look so pretty today! when it's actually The Prototype all along. Just don't expect it to admit to those same words in its usual tones.

And there we have it. Two hours ten mins of writing Poppy Playtime headcanons 😀 I'm now going to lie unconscious in bed for an appropriate amount of time, so thanks for reading.

[tanadrin]

Sorry about the long ask, but what do you think about this claim: i often see marxists (and adjacent groups, blah blah) say that the united states (empire) is about to collapse or is gradually declining, something along those lines, and specifically with regard to its economy, military and ideology. For example, i was watching a video hosting Richard Wolff, and he claimed that the united states is being replaced by china as the global superpower; he compares the situation to the historical rise of the united states relative to the british empire that slowly took place in the 19th and 20th centuries. I think his comparison is slightly flawed (imo hes comparing apples to oranges here), but in the broad strokes he might be right? I also remember seeing a pretty respectable maoist on here claim the us military is failing. Idk, i would like to hear your take

This answer got real long, so I added a cut. The short version is "people who say things like this are living in a fantasy land, and you can safely ignore their opinions on anything else as a result."

The United States is not the USSR in 1990 or Somalia in 1994 or Rome in the fifth century, or anything similar. Failed states are absolutely a thing, and they're fascinating (and often quite depressing!) historical case studies, and the United States looks nothing like a failed state. It's not even about to collapse in the sense of "suffer a prolonged period of sharp economic decline that forces it to drastically reduce its presence in the wider world and curtails its power in influence." It's not even about to collapse in the sense of "experience significant regime change." The U.S. economy is, overall, doing quite well. There is no significant popular unrest. There is no elite appetite for revolution. There are not competing centers of power that would rather see the status quo burned to the ground than their rivals get power. You might want the U.S. to collapse, and you might not, but the idea it is about to is pure fantasy.

I think before we get to any other specific claims about the United States' position relative to other countries, it's important to note that claims of impending American collapse are, like claims of impending civilizational collapse or Paul Ehrlich's claim of worldwide hunger or breathless claims that the war in Ukraine is going to escalate into WW3 any day now, IMO affective claims about how the speaker feels about the world: there is a certain class of person who, whether out of nihilistic glee, hope of revolutionary change, or simply untrammeled anxiety sees the signs of collapse all around them, Doom-Is-Nigh streetcorner prophets who are emotionally invested in the idea of collapse, for whom the idea of collapse would often justify some pillar of their politics. If, after all, the US is a failed state about to be toppled by its own decadence, this would justify their inordinate degree of contempt for the US.

On another recent post someone phrased claims like this as often being more about "what would be necessary for someone's politics to be justified," and I think that's an important part of it! In fact I think "affective claims about the world being distorted into factual claims about the world bc they are what would be necessary to justify someone's politics" is a fully general phenomenon, regardless of political orientation. There are much milder forms of it than out-and-out doomerism, though of course the absurdity of doomerist claims to this degree make it really hard to take someone's claims about the state of the world seriously.

About the specific claims here:

Re: China: China has experienced terrific growth since the end of WW2, and that's great! A country of over a billion people should by any reasonable metric be one of the largest economies on Earth, and China is, it seems, taking its inevitable place internationally as an economic powerhouse. It's a big country with a ton of people, and it's terrific that it has been able to lift so many people out of the grinding poverty that prevailed throughout much of the country in the 20th century. But like a lot of middle-income countries it seems to be having a ton of trouble, for significant institutional reasons, transitioning from an industrialization-focused economy to one driven by consumer demand and consumer spending. AIUI (and I am so, so far from an expert; mostly I just read what folks like @argumate post from other sources), China has a lot of debt dragging down its economy, and weak consumer demand. China is still much poorer than the United States on a per capita basis, and though it has a large military, is much less capable of projecting its power beyond its borders. It has aspired to increase its economic and diplomatic influence through the Belt and Road initiative, but returns on this project have been decidedly mixed, and China's military and strategic focus remains decidedly confined to its neighborhood. It wants to absorb Taiwan and protect its interests in the South China Sea, and prop up North Korea and such, but it's not able to or interested in, like, fielding large carrier groups that routinely sail up and down the world's oceans or conduct invasions of distant countries like the U.S. is able to. N.B., I'm not saying those invasions are good, just that the U.S. can historically, if it wants, invade and occupy basically any small-to-medium sized country on the planet in a few weeks, and that's not the kind of capability China has, or--AFAICT--is interested in developing.

The British Empire comparison is also, I think, very misleading, and gets at something I find frustrating about a lot of modern Marxists: they want to fit everything into the model of 19th century capitalist imperialism, when the modern global system doesn't look too much like that anymore. Mostly countries like the United States, if they have economic interests in a country, don't invade and reduce the country to a status of colony to extract raw resources from. The Cold War supported a fair bit of regime change in the service of commercial interests, even in the aftermath of post-WW2 decolonization, but nowadays the tools used to develop and enforce the international order preferred by the Status Quo Coalition (which is led, but not commanded by the United States) are much more indirect. They don't involve directly administering colonies, which is significant because colonialism is, for the states that run it, expensive as hell. Sure, it's great for commercial interests--but it's often more a drain on state finances than anything else. I have come around to the view that colonialism was as much an expression of wealth as it was a means to acquire more. Britain was always a small-but-wealthy island country whose empire was much, much larger than its metropole. The vast majority of the population and wealth controlled by the United States is within the fifty states which comprise the core territory of the United States. This isn't Britain with a far-flung overseas empire which is expensive to administer and a minority of Britons on the island itself--this is a country whose wealth and industry is built on a population of 350 million or so which identifies as American first, which speaks English and votes for President and congress. Most of the United States' actual imperial possessions are tiny archipelagoes these days that are economically marginal, or else military bases overseas--these do not generate American wealth and power, they are expressions of it. For the United States to collapse like the British Empire did, it would have to lose control of California and Texas and the Midwest or something like that--which is a goofy-ass fantasy, because if the United States federal government disappeared tomorrow, I think the vast majority of the 350 million or so people living in the present borders of the United States would support re-establishing the United States federal government. Americans like and support the country they live in! This is very different from the subjects of the British Raj, or even the people of Australia and Canada, who had begun to develop their own identity (and thanks to distance from the metropole, completely divergent economic and political interests).

"The U.S. is an empire analogous Britain" is only true if you squint from very far away and don't care about the specifics of history, economics, or politics. But I think again the way to understand this claim is partly affective. If the U.S. really is the second incarnation of the British Empire, then you can cast a lot of disparate conflicts that otherwise don't fit the mold under the aegis of a broad anti-colonial struggle. It also facilitates a certain sort of base campism that some people love to indulge in--the NATO-is-always-evil-so-anything-NATO-doesn't-like-is-good angle, which has a lot of self-described leftists backing in to saying that Putin's Russia is somehow an antifascist or anticolonial force for good in the world.

"The U.S. military is failing" is pure cope. There's no country or active coalition of countries that's even remotely close to the U.S. military in capabilities. Though there is always going to be a stream of waste and corruption and medium-sized bureaucratic fuckups streaming out of the U.S. military, it remains without peer simply by virtue of one of the largest economies on the planet being willing to spend like 4% of its GDP on military stuff. The EU or China might in some counterfactual world be able to field a similar military if they spent a comparable amount, and had similar strategic aims, but they won't and they don't, so unless U.S. foreign policy drastically changes and military spending is slashed as a result, I don't see that changing at any time in the near future.

[majoryeager104]

First Bungou Stray Dogs Post! Headcannons!!

yippeeee I’ve loved BSD for a while but I’ve been obsessing sm lately for no reason sooo here’s some relationship hc’s for my faves bc why not

idk why this ended up looking so chaotic but oh well

INCLUDES: Dazai, Chuuya, Ranpo, and Jouno

Dazai 🎀🎀🎀

cuteness aggression?

he has a severe case.

be careful cos if he sees you and you get too close he won’t let go.

Most likely a biter too

Like, as a warning, if you’re cuddling and you look to cute to him Hes gonna bite you

‘bc your so sweet 🥹’

he probably doesn’t actually ask you to commit double suicide with him

like, I think he’d joke about it, but really doesn’t expect you to say yes

more like he doesn’t want you to tbh

sweetie pie bitch.

Chuuya 🧑‍🦰🍷📏

you’re the only person who’s allowed to make jokes about his height

And ‘allowed’ is a strong word

like, he won’t kick you into next month

but he’ll be grumpy about it ☹️

but I know you probably wouldn’t do that to him

right…? Ahem anyways-

He’d be a sweet af boyfriend (a basic hc but that’s because it’s TRUE)

like he’d do more than buy you things and cuddle i actually think he’d be such a reassuring person to be around

Knows when you’re sad or self conscious and somehow manages to tell you eXACTLY WHAT YOU NEED TO HEAR.

for someone who doesn’t feel human he’s sure better at being one that everyone else 🤷‍♀️

Ranpo ☝️🤓

bros annoying af

but he’s adorable so you have to let it slide.

if you’re wondering how you got together

After joining the ADA you bought him his favorite candy without realizing it was his favorite

and he was so touched by your absentminded care that he immediately deduced w that big ass brain of his that he wanted you under his arm

arm candy.

bc ur hot af

brags about you too much

to an extent that Fukuzawa had to LECTURE HIM THAT HE WAS BEING ANNOYING.

Didn’t work tho he still yaps about u to everyone he sees

Jouno 🧑‍🦯🦊

He cannot see you

That is a given.

still calls you pretty tho 😭😭😭

he’d either be a really sweet boyfriend or a really toxic one

but I think if he gets attached to someone enough to date them

he’d Definitely treat them right

bc if he’s attached he’d be scared you’d leave so ultimate princess treatment girl or boy

Bc of his hearing, he gets really sensitive to loud sounds, so dates in public might not be the best for him

that’s okay tho bc staying in and cuddling is absolutely fine by him

he likes laying his head on your chest and listening to your heartbeat 😭😭😭

Immediately failed on spelling lmao

[xskyll]

Quirkless Deku AU in which, after All Might tells Izuku he can't be a hero, Izuku takes the words to heart and decides to completely cut heroics out of his life, so he isn't reminded of his failed dream. He doesn't have any social media and doesn't read news articles about heroes. If a hero is mentioned on tv, he turns it off. He buys the same, non-sponsored groceries all the time, and he forks out the extra money to go ad-free on things like YouTube, so he never sees them in commercials. We know he's a thorough person, and he applies those skills, avoiding heroes to an impressive extent and just focusing on whatever new career path he set his eyes on (Maybe botany? But this isn't just like, basic flower shop AU. He's super smart, so my boy is probably breeding award-winning new species of orchids or some shit.)

As such, he ends up being probably the only person in Japan who has never heard of Todoroki Shouto.

They have some sort of meet-cute, and at first, Shouto can't figure out why this guy is pretending not to know who he is (is he trying to be polite, pretending Shouto is normal??), but eventually he realizes Izuku legitimately has no clue who he is, and Shouto is soooo enamoured, because Izuku is so nice and seems genuinely interested in him, and for the first time, Shouto knows it's all sincere and not someone trying to get close to him because he's famous. He becomes desperate to keep his profession a secret, leading to some comically close calls. But the longer it goes, the harder he falls, and Momo keeps insisting he has to tell Izuku the truth because he can't enter a serious relationship with this huge lie between them. But just when he's about to fess up, something happens that makes it clear to him that Izuku isn't just out of touch with popular culture, he is /actively/ avoiding heroes and dislikes hearing about them, which makes Shouto think he'll stop talking to him, and he doesn't know what to do, and now Jirou is helping Momo scold him, and he's so stressed.

Of course, the boys don't realize they know someone in common. Bakugou somehow lets the cat out of the bag, not knowing Shouto was keeping his heroics a secret. (Back to botany...maybe instead of orchids, Izu specializes in poisonous plants? And a new poison is involved in some sort of crime, and the police want him on as a consult, and Bakugou ends up involved on the heroics end of things, leading to a reunion with Izuku who he hasn't seen since middle school. Somehow Shouto comes up in conversation while they're working on the case.)

And then it all goes to shit, Idk what happens next. Izuku is more upset about being lied to than Shouto being a hero, and Shouto has to prove he wasn't just messing around. I feel like there's a scene in there where Izuku cries on his mom's lap, and Shouto gets an earful from her. They make up, of course, and start dating. Since this is one of my ideas, they probably get married in the epilogue.

[mythicmanuscripts]

Hi! I love your blog so much. I'm literally obsessed! I've wanted sub aemond content for so long and your account is like an oasis in the desert.

I was thinking about aemond and how for so long he felt unwanted and unloved, like he didn't have a place among his family. Because of this I think he'd really like reader telling him "Your mine", even more so than being told "im yours". Not in a aggressive or possessive way (although I do think he'd like reader being protective of him) but in the sense that someone loves him so much that they would openly claim him as theirs. That they aren't ashamed of him or for others to know he's all theirs.

I also think it provides him some sense of security. Like he feels so safe knowing he belongs to you so he doesn't have to worry about anyone else.

Idk if this makes sense, hopefully it does😭I just can't stop thinking about this, I've had it on my mind for a while now.

Oh my god I love this!!! This is so perfect everything you wrote here is incredible.

There’s nothing explicit in my answer but it is very clearly sub!Aemond and has some suggestive tones so I’ll hide it under the cut just in case :))

So I think Aemond really struggles with the idea of being anyone’s first choice? He grew up as a second son, always teased and mocked and never taken seriously. He didn’t expect you to be any different.

The first thing you do that really shows Aemond how much you care for him is just how loyal you are? I’m thinking of a situation where you and your family are at the red keep to look for a husband for you, and obviously your family are trying their hardest to secure an betrothal from Aegon because he’s king.

But then Aemond catches your eye? You end up having a very simple conversations with him, and you know pretty much instantly that he’s the one you want. Aemond wants you too of course. He hasn’t felt this accepted in his life and he absolutely loves talking with you. You and him sit together at the far end of the table every dinner, taking amongst yourselves and Aemond doesn’t even acknowledge anyone else. He takes every scrap of your attention that he can, especially because he’s so certain that your parents are angling for Aegon and that once the betrothal is announced he won’t be able to spend time with you like this again.

You put a spanner in the works. After a few weeks at the red keep you tell your family in no uncertain terms that you want Aemond and Aemond only. Your family is hesitant, both because Aemond is the second son and because Aemond is known to be violent and cold.

But you insist.

When your parents go to Aemond to tell him that you have expressed your desire to marry him instead of Aegon, the poor lad just about feints. He says he would be honoured of course, and then the moment they leave he’s sprinting across the castle to your quarters.

You’re confused to see him knocking on your door. You know you shouldn’t open the door because people might see and rumours may start but you couldn’t care less. He is here, so you will let him in.

At first you actually think he looks upset? When you ask what’s going on he just softly asks, “Do you really want me? Did you mean it when you told your parents I was your first choice?”

You don’t even get to finish the word “yes” before he’s barrelling forwards and pulling you into a tight hug. He buries his head in your shoulder and clings to you. He’s so overwhelmed to hear that someone actually chooses him, never mind it being someone he already wishes he could marry.

You hug him back of course, and then when you try to pull away he just grips you tighter. It's like he's afraid if he lets go of you that you'll disappear. You end up having to just rub his back and whisper that you mean it, that you aren't going anywhere.

Aemond truly doesn’t even know what to do with himself when you tell him that you never even considered Aegon, from the moment you saw him no one else came close.

This is definitely where the possessiveness comes in, because there’d be a period between expressing this and actually having the betrothal ironed out and announced.

Until then, all the other male suiters try to get your attention and win your love and it drives Aemond absolutely insane. You actually have to watch him very closely or else he will lure a suitor into the gardens and kill them. He’s threatens to plenty of times.

A big part of this possessive comes from the fact that he honestly is just waiting for the other shoe to drop? He’s so certain that one day you'll wake up and realise what a terrible decision you've made and beg for the betrothal to be canceled.

So every time you talk to another man, he's so so convinced you'll prefer them and tell him that you don't want him anymore. Which is why he absolutely hates seeing you with other people because he thinks every time he's losing his chance.

And so every time you walk back to him and tell him that you can't wait for your parents to officially announce the betrothal he nearly starts crying. He's watching you choose him over and over again and he truly cannot believe it.

As much as he's very traditional and respectful, I think he kinda just falls apart when faced with the fact that you genuinely want him? He tell himself he'll do this the right way, the way that's expected of him but he can't control himself when he's faced with the reality that you actually genuinely want him.

I don't think you two would be able to wait until marriage for that exact reason. He cannot stand the thought of another even considering being with you and honestly he can't even sleep thinking about it.

He ends up knocking on your door most nights and spending hours with you. He can't get enough of you, and he especially can't get enough of hearing you say you love him and want him. How could he ever be expected to spend the night alone knowing that a few floors down there's a woman he absolutely adores who will open her door and let him cuddle her and hear about her day?

He cannot be expected to spend the nights alone and to watch you speak to others and to wait patiently until the betrothal is announced. He never expected to find someone who makes him feel loved and safe and now that he has found you he will never ever let you go.

[help-i-need-a-cool-username]

Im reading time travel fanfic rn heres a bunch stuff i havent seen yet. Theres A LOT of sw fanfic out there so they might exist but heres what i couldnt find when i did my last time travel fanfic binge back in like 2018 and im looking for now

I said this in its own post but WHERE are the fics where someone from tcw travels to the future, sees how much it SUCKS, and then go off the rails trying to fix it when they return

Old! Man! Clones! gimme one or a group of post- or rebellion era clones that end up in tcw. NO CLONE should be THAT AGE at that point in time and you can take that in so many directions

The time travelers are R2D2 and 3CPO only. This is hilarious chaos

Where are the crack fics? Every single fic is sad

Back in 2018 there was like 2 Ezra Bridger time travel fics DESPITE THE FREAKING FACT he found the world between worlds PLEASE tell me theres more now

Back in 2018 there were almost NO Leia time travel fics PLEASE i want to see her try and murder Anakin on first sight THE ANGST CONTENT IS RIGHT THERE

Han telling Obi-Wan that Leia named their kid after him. Obi-Wan is awkward. Han proceeds to say "the kid still turned to the dark side like his shitty grandpa, but hey, the thought was there!" slaps him on the shoulder and then walks away

Idk what age the twins are but they come from a universe where they grew up with Uncle Ben and around enough of his friends that they learned embarrassing stories about him. Someone says they're in a situation and one of the twins is like "i think what he's saying is this is between a 'told the Jedi Council they could kiss his ass as a teenager' and 'accidentally got married for the fourth time' on the Uncle Ben's Fuck Ups Scale" in front of a Anakin who's only ever seen the Perfect Jedi™️ Obi-Wan Kenobi act

Actually how about adult Anakin meeting teenager Obi-Wan? I havent seen that before

Anakin looking at Leia and immediately seeing Padme before becoming ultimately CRUSHED upon hearing her last name is Organa. Anakin's brain then jumps the gun to "i died in this war and Padme gets remarried"

Luke may be the (highly controversial at this time) Jedi but Leia is the diplomat and manages all the talking at the Temple/with the Council

Leia seeing her parents again!! Not Anakin and Padme. She talks to Bail and Breha!!

Leia spitting fire at Anakin as she yells to everyone in the room what he did to Alderaan. That he is a MONSTER and will NEVER EVER be her father

The tcw Council meeting the og trio. They get upitty about how Luke runs things. They get mad when they find out Leia was married. Han responds that "we're divorced so this attachment thing you're all upset about was apparently not actually a issue for her. Also, shes not a jedi"

Yoda and Luke vibing together on a frequency unseen before. Everyone already doesnt like Luke (the tcw jedi see him as some uneducated hippie) but this is just unnerving

OLD MAN BEN MEETING MASTER OBI-WAN KENOBI. It has been IMPOSSIBLE for me to find a fic with this since ppl always go the "reappear in younger body" trope

EDIT: ive thought of more

Found out i said this years ago but you know what its still true and i only found TWO fics like it when i searched yesterday: Ezra AND Ahsoka in tcw together

Obi-Wan and Luke appear in the tcw era. Obi-Wan convinces Luke to be Luke Lars, Anakin's nephew. Luke tries to get to know Anakin. Anakin tries to come to grips with the son of a guy he met once calling him Uncle Ani

A lot of fics the time traveling jedi just folds and regressed into their past self which is a valid psych thing but you know what fics i dont see? The trust being broken irreversibly. The jedi spent 3 years fighting with the clones and the next TWENTY being hunted by them. Give me a jedi that cant be calm around their old men. That cant walk on a star destroyer without fear. That attacks everyone who loved and trusted them in this time before running because survival takes over. In Obi-Wan's and Ahsoka's case, fight and flee hardest against Anakin

EDIT: more additions

Ben and Leia from the Kenobi series magically appear on the Negotiator/Resolute. Ben looks like he's homeless and Leia is a sassy child. Leia calls Ben "a old man that crawled out of a dumpster" and the clones laugh while Ben looks like he needs a drink. Cody sees how skinny Ben is and gets concerned. Anakin walks in on the clones thirsting over Ben and Anakin is traumatized. Obi-Wan thinks Ben must be a older brother or cousin or other relative of his birth family before he thinks time travel. Everyone thinks Ben is being cute by calling Leia "your highness" and "princess" before whoops what do you mean thats Alderaan's princess???

Same as above but sadder. Ben and Leia manage to slip out and by the time the group figures out Ben is Obi-Wan they're long gone. OR Ben looked around, realized he was surrounded by his trauma, and fought his way out. Either way Ben and Leia end up being chased by them planet to planet

[majoralynx]

Hello :] I'm genuinely curious about your soulmate au care to share a bit of lore? 👀 only if you want too ofc :3

Yes hello!! Thank you for the ask, here are some details for my LU modern soulmate AU !! I will be making little comic snippets based on it so stay tuned for that as well :) there likely won’t be a set plot for the whole thing but I’m giving the characters and world lots of lore!! Who knows, maybe I’ll eventually have a plot for it…

Soulmate AU’s have always fascinated me and I’ve always wanted to do one !! I would like to say that two of the bond effects(?? Idk if that’s what you refer to it as but that’s what we’re going with..) for soulmates was inspired by a fic I read a while ago, I don’t remember what the author’s name was unfortunately but I know a few details may be similar or the same with the effects, although I believe they might be pretty common effects in soulmate AU’s but I thought I’d say something anyway!

Here’s where the details actually start,

– Soulmates can project Certain traits (emotions, thoughts, physical feelings, etc..) to each other, all ends of a bond can send general feelings but they get much more concentrated depending on which trait one end is directly given. Projecting a sense or trait is a conscious decision, however, if the feeling or sense a soulmate is feeling is very big or overwhelming it can bleed over without them wanting it to.

-Normally, soulmates are only a pair, but our cast happens to be special, so that's not the case. I’m adding two other factors to the soulmate bonds: soulmarks, markings that change depending on whether or not you've met your soulmate, usually around the wrist, and journals!! I haven't seen this AU trait very often personally, but I think it’s really neat, the journal trait is when you and your soulmate(s) have a journal that transfers anything added to it, ink, color, glue, tears, blood, etc. (If you run out of journal space, you get a new one, like filling sketchbooks and getting a new one blah blah blah...magic!!)

Now let’s get into soulmate group effects with the Chain (and other main cast figures)!!!

– Sky projects visions (whether that's prophetic or just things he can see).

– ‘Four’ projects general emotions/feelings (anger, happiness, calm, pride(do those count as emotions ??idc) you get the gist).

– Time projects their hearing.

– Twilight projects his sense of smell.

– Wind can project dreams, as well as enter other people's dreams with full control of himself (oh the pranks he will get up to with the excuse of it being a dream and the chain not knowing his ability…).

– Legend can project thoughts, as well as receive them, he cannot view other people's thoughts without permission but he can send to his hearts content.

– Hyrule projects pain (which is not an often occurrence because of the whole ‘cult’ situation…).

– Warriors projects physical touch (say someone sets their hand on his shoulder and he projects it, then everyone will feel it.)

– Wild projects taste.

The shadow trio,

– Ravio projects pain (he likes to use it against Dink and project his scoliosis pain onto him when Dink is being an ass,,, Shadow is not amused).

– Dink projects physical touch, much like Wars.

– Shadow projects thoughts, same as Legend.

The Zeldas,

– Sun projects emotions.

– Dot projects taste.

– Lullaby projects pain.

– Dusk projects touch.

– Tetra projects smell.

– Fable projects hearing.

– Aurora projects dreams.

– Dawn projects thoughts.

– Artemis is not yet decided.

– Flora projects vision.

If anyone has any questions about anything or any details regarding any other characters or just the AU in general, my ask page is always open!!

Have some Ravio doodles for the road,

[eevees-hobbies]

um um um Eve I had a bad day today and I was wondering if you could (please feel free to ignore me if you’re not interested or I’m annoying!!) write something about some of the windbre boys showing off their chubby gf 👉🏼👈🏼 they can get smutty or stay wholesome, whichever is easier for you. Maybe ume, togame, sakura, endo, and hiragi? Idk if that’s too many people. I hope you’re having a great day!!

Author’s Note: Hi, Anon! I’m sorry to hear you had a bad day,and even though I’m fulfilling this request a few days late (sorry!) I hope that the little piece below makes you smile even a little bit. I’m a thick girl myself, so I love when writers talk about readers' curves, rolls, cellulite, big asses, BREASTS, BIG THIGHS (oh my). Also, please don’t say you’re annoying because you aren’t and never could be, babe 💕. Sorry for not writing for Endo yet (I still haven’t gotten to him in the manga!). I enjoyed writing this. Sakura, please marry me!

Content Warning: Made with fem! reader in mind :) Reader x Haruka Sakura, Reader x Hajime Umemiya, Reader x Toma Hiragi. It's fluffy, except Hiragi does try to sneak something inappropriate in there. Also, tw: for body insecurities.

Word Count: 892 (it’s not about size, it’s what you do with it!)

Dividers by Saradika

Haruka Sakura

Quite frankly, Sakura is tired of your bullshit tonight. You’ve been acting out of the ordinary, hiding behind him, avoiding eye contact with others, and talking barely above a whisper.

“What is wrong with you?” His dual-colored eyes search yours for any indication of what might be your problem. 

“You haven’t given me shit all night, and it’s startin’ to make me nervous!”

You briefly let out a small laugh, but it’s so barely detectable that Sakura can’t savor the sound. 

You open your mouth but avert your eyes from him. “I…I’m being dumb, but I don’t like the way this dress feels on me. I shouldn’t have worn it, and now people are s-staring at me…”

Sakura looks around at the packed bar. Sure, he notices glances, but he knows what it’s like to be looked at as though you’re shit on the bottom of someone’s shoe, and that’s not what he’s seeing. He leans closer to you, his face so close that you can see the individual hairs of his eyelashes.

“Look at me. Everyone’s looking at you because you’re fucking gorgeous, and if someone did have anything to say about your dress,” he pauses, “my new favorite dress, I’ll kick their fucking asses!”

You look up at Sakura in pure adoration, love, and devotion—feeling the insecurity wash away as he looks down at you as though you are the only person in the entire world that matters–and to Haruka Sakura, that’s the case.

“The man that you are, Haruka.” 

Hajime Umemiya

You stand nervously in the bathroom of Cafe Pothos as you splash cool water on your face. You feel on the verge of passing out as anxiety grips your throat and chest, making it hard to breathe.

Quick but soft knocks at the door break you out of your panic attack, and Umemiya’s soothing voice reaches you, “Y/N, my friends are here. Are you ok, babe?”

You are not ok.

You’ve been dating Umemiya for months, and everything had been perfect until he planned a meet-n-greet with his friends. Residual insecurity from partners who were cruel after their friends disapproved of you and what you looked like set you into a spiral that you couldn’t break out of.

But it’s now or never.

You pull open the door and give him your best attempt at a smile for someone who was just having a panic attack in a public restroom.

Umemiya knows exactly what’s going through your mind without you having to say it, and despite his constant praise of you, he understands that sometimes actions are far more effective.

He grabs you by the hand and pulls you into the central area of the cafe, where all of his friends sit. You want to crawl into yourself as all eyes are on you, but before you shut down, Umemiya speaks first.

“Guys! This is my girlfriend, Y/N. Please don’t embarrass me in front of her; she thinks I’m cool.” 

Hiragi offers a kind smile, “Well, she’s going to be disappointed because there’s not a cool bone in your body. Nice to me ya, Y/N. He talks about you all the time.”

Your eyes get wide as you look up at a blushing Umemiya. 

“Really?”

Someone you recognize as Tsubakino chimes in, “All the time, and who can blame him when you’re so cute?”

“Hey, guys, leave the complimenting my girl to me, please. Not trying to have you steal her.”

You feel Umemiya’s hand squeeze yours, and your shoulders relax as you wonder what you were worrying about to begin with.

Toma Hiragi 

Hiragi sighs heavily as he listens to the continuous chatter of Umemiya who is giving a long-winded update on the state of horticulture efforts across North America. It’s a random topic, but Umemiya is in hyperfixation mode, and there’s no stopping him once he gets started.

You’re sitting with them, trying not to let your mind wander in case there’s a pop-quiz on the subject.

Hiragi looks at you and rolls his eyes with a smile; you manage a barely silent giggle in return.

Twenty minutes pass, and the torture ends; as Umemiya squeezes out of the booth and you stand up to allow him to pass, Hiragi follows suit, placing a hand on your stomach and giving the soft flesh a gentle squeeze almost on instinct.

Your face heats up because surely Umemiya saw that, but if he did, he says nothing as he waves goodbye to you both.

You quickly turn to Hiragi once Ume is out of sight, “Toma! Why’d you do that!?”

His brows furrow in confusion at your sudden outburst, “do what?”

“You grabbed my stomach in front of Ume and it was NOT an innocent grab!”

“There you go, being a pain in my ass again. What are you talking about? Ume knows you’re curvy, everyone knows, and I’ll be damned if I let you police my squeezing of you in public.”

“You are an undeniable pervert that should be on a list with other perverts!”

He shakes his head and pulls out his gas-kun10. For someone that he loves beyond a shadow of a doubt, you still somehow manage to stimulate the wrath of his poor digestive system.

“You owe me for that smart-ass remark, girl. You can sit on my-”

“TOMA!”