#in case someone might not want to see or hear about that idk

[gluevah]

Went to the mall yesterday with Jeremy to see IF, which was a really lovely film. It made me super emotional though, I was crying at parts where I didn't even know why! Definitely recommend going to see it though.

We went to the Squishable store, I was hoping they had the weevil and the rainbow caterpillar but they didn't. I did not leave empty-handed though; they had a sale going on and I had just gotten paid, which is a recipe for trouble.

I ended up getting these guys!

I immediately picked up the bone dragon when I first came in because the spooky ones always look like they need love. I love all the different kinds of textures he has! Long fluffy fur, and 2 different types of minky. He does not stand up by himself, bless his heart. He is very cuddly and I love his bone wings! His finger claws are flat but the feet ones are 3D plush claws. His teeth are soft, not made of felt, but the edges are a bit rough.

The strawberry crocodile is one I've wanted since it came out, the shape is very nice for hugging and the fur is so soft! The underbelly is long minky. I love his little teefs, he's just a baby 🥺 Also he matches my bed so well lol

I wanted to get the micro nurse for awhile but just hadn't gotten around to picking one up. I got Jeremy the plague doctor, and I wanted us to have matching ones! The caterpillar is so cute, and they didn't have the rainbow one, so I picked him to be another lil portable buddy!

While we were at the mall, Jeremy and I got our ears pierced c: I used to have mine done but they closed. Jeremy had been wanting to get his ear pierced for awhile, and we figured hey why not while we're here. I'll ask him if I can post a photo of him here Here's us with our new earrings c:

We held each other's hands while we got it done; he was nervous because he didn't know how it'd feel, I was nervous because of who I am as a person.

[flyingspicerack]

mm...

[xiao-come-home]

Boothill relationship headcanons;

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✰ Characters: Boothill x reader.

✰ Words: ~1k.

✰ SFW+N//SFW ; SFW mentions no pronouns or gender of the reader. N//SFW section was written with fem!reader in mind.

Warnings: THIS HAS A NSFW PART. MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS skip this section if possible. some of these hc are based on this post, since i wanted to write a little more about it.

A/N: BRAINROT gRR he truly gives me doctor by Miley Cyrus vibes. idk how to explain it but take it

┗━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━┛

Boothill:

SFW

he's such a gentleman! opens doors for you, pulls out a chair, kisses your hand when he sees you first for the day, it doesn't get boring for him at all. if you ignore some of his unhinged behaviors, then he's a perfect man.

like i mentioned in my previous post, he's VERY possessive of you. he does like to go to unknown clubs or bars with you to try out their best drinks in his spare time, though he doesn't have you attached to his hip (even.. if he wouldn't probably mind at all), he does keep a sharp eye on you. if a weird guy approaches you and you're clearly uncomfortable, he tries to intimidate the guy away and clearly let him see that you're his (aka placing his arm around your waist and pushing you into him), if being polite doesn't work, well, they have a rough night. not in a good way.

this man SCREAMS BACK HUGS!! since his body is like 90% metal and machines, he loves to embrace you from behind and wrap his arms around your tummy, while his chin rests on your shoulder. he misses the softness of his own skin, so having you gives him a lot of comfort; the warmth you're radiating makes him reluctant to ever pull away. boothill often finds himself touching his cheeks with his robotic arms, when they get warm enough - the feeling almost long forgotten in his mind.

speaking of back hugs: he's also very big on neck kisses, mostly giving than receiving, depending on how he feels, they're either very innocent and loving - very soft, paired with butterfly kisses, or biting you and then kissing it better, when things get steamy.

boothil finds it funny when his hair tickles you when he hugs you from behind. if he's feeling particularly like a little shit that day, he can annoy you the entire day like that, only to respond with "hmm? what do you mean? I'm not doing anything, baby!" ...don't tell him his smirk gives it away, but honestly, at this point, he probably doesn't try to hide it that well.

he DOES slap your ass when you go past him. EVERY time. it doesn't get boring for him, he likes the sound it makes AND how soft it is, bonus if it jiggles, then he's even more proud. he might offer "an apologetic massage," which you rarely agree to (but he'll try until u say yes).

if someone ever tinkers with his Synesthesia beacon, he cannot swear for his life. you might catch him trying to cook, spilling something, and then hearing loud "YOU LITTLE DAISY FLOWER! CUTIE PIE! CURSED FROG!" it's kinda impressive how colorful they can get...

speaking of his voice, he's probably able to manipulate it so it sounds the best according to your taste. although his flesh heart has been gone for so long, he still feels that familiar, warm feeling and squeeze of his own, mechanical one, when your answer is always the same - to modulate it so it sounds the closest to what it used to be, or that the current one is just as pleasant to hear.

he likes to kiss you. no matter where, or when. if he wants to, he'll get one, pressing you against him, cupping your face with one hand, and kissing your puckered lips. once you give in, he kisses you properly, caressing your cheek ever so slightly to ease any discomfort left, only to hold you tightly on your hips and whimper on purpose just to tease you more (i believe in boothill is a little shit theory).

if we assume his face is the only human part of him left (besides his eyes). In that case, he just truly loves the softness of your lips on his. he kisses you as much as he can, and will get all fussy and whiny if he doesn't get his good morning kiss, we-see-each-other-for-the-first-time-today kiss (note: this is not the same as good morning kiss), goodnight kiss and so on. yes, he could get it by himself, but he wants it from you first. he's just very stubborn.

watch out! he likes to draw blood on your lower lip when his intrusive thoughts win. he licks the blood off later, and gives it a loving kiss.

his hair is genuine, so he loves whenever you play with it, brush it, or take care of it in general. it's probably one of the very few human features of his, so if your boothill lets you carefully pamper it, let alone without flooding his cords, he's not only very impressed, but also very willing to indulge in more sessions.

finds it absolutely adorable when you wear his hat when he isn't looking. or, well, when you think he isn't looking.

N/SFW. minors and ageless blogs shoo!

the council has decided that he has a vibrator in place of his real junk. but if you're into experimenting and want him to feel a bit more, hm, natural - he's more than happy to change his parts. shape, size and pace - everything for his lady.

you can probably guess, but that's an absolute ass man. he sees you in tighter pants that hug you just so nicely and might go feral.

eats pussy like a starved man. he has no shame and licks, sucks, and fucks you with his tongue and THE SOUNDS could put the devil himself to shame. boothill always wants everyone to know that you're his, how you scream and moan for him, so in return - he never lets a drop of your juices go to waste, slurping and moaning into your slit.

he's literally so flexible, that he'll fuck you in every position you want him to. if it means he'll get deeper, he's on board. and probably on top of you too.

likes to grope you through your clothes. sounds very tame, but it really gets him going, and might sometimes cause trouble in public.. unless you WANT that trouble.

adding to the headcanon above - he truly just gets turned on by your skin, especially imperfections. stretch marks? he'll kiss them all, scars? he has them all memorized. when he touches you through your clothes, he already remembers what is where, it's like he's edging himself knowing that soon enough he'll undress you completely and see it clearly; he quite literally worships what truly makes you... you.

he. is. so. SO over when you pull on his hair. when you make out, when he fucks you - doesn't matter. DO IT and he'll go absolutely crazy, hissing in pleasure and grinding into you.

[eevees-hobbies]

um um um Eve I had a bad day today and I was wondering if you could (please feel free to ignore me if you’re not interested or I’m annoying!!) write something about some of the windbre boys showing off their chubby gf 👉🏼👈🏼 they can get smutty or stay wholesome, whichever is easier for you. Maybe ume, togame, sakura, endo, and hiragi? Idk if that’s too many people. I hope you’re having a great day!!

Author’s Note: Hi, Anon! I’m sorry to hear you had a bad day,and even though I’m fulfilling this request a few days late (sorry!) I hope that the little piece below makes you smile even a little bit. I’m a thick girl myself, so I love when writers talk about readers' curves, rolls, cellulite, big asses, BREASTS, BIG THIGHS (oh my). Also, please don’t say you’re annoying because you aren’t and never could be, babe 💕. Sorry for not writing for Endo yet (I still haven’t gotten to him in the manga!). I enjoyed writing this. Sakura, please marry me!

Content Warning: Made with fem! reader in mind :) Reader x Haruka Sakura, Reader x Hajime Umemiya, Reader x Toma Hiragi. It's fluffy, except Hiragi does try to sneak something inappropriate in there. Also, tw: for body insecurities.

Word Count: 892 (it’s not about size, it’s what you do with it!)

Dividers by Saradika

Haruka Sakura

Quite frankly, Sakura is tired of your bullshit tonight. You’ve been acting out of the ordinary, hiding behind him, avoiding eye contact with others, and talking barely above a whisper.

“What is wrong with you?” His dual-colored eyes search yours for any indication of what might be your problem. 

“You haven’t given me shit all night, and it’s startin’ to make me nervous!”

You briefly let out a small laugh, but it’s so barely detectable that Sakura can’t savor the sound. 

You open your mouth but avert your eyes from him. “I…I’m being dumb, but I don’t like the way this dress feels on me. I shouldn’t have worn it, and now people are s-staring at me…”

Sakura looks around at the packed bar. Sure, he notices glances, but he knows what it’s like to be looked at as though you’re shit on the bottom of someone’s shoe, and that’s not what he’s seeing. He leans closer to you, his face so close that you can see the individual hairs of his eyelashes.

“Look at me. Everyone’s looking at you because you’re fucking gorgeous, and if someone did have anything to say about your dress,” he pauses, “my new favorite dress, I’ll kick their fucking asses!”

You look up at Sakura in pure adoration, love, and devotion—feeling the insecurity wash away as he looks down at you as though you are the only person in the entire world that matters–and to Haruka Sakura, that’s the case.

“The man that you are, Haruka.” 

Hajime Umemiya

You stand nervously in the bathroom of Cafe Pothos as you splash cool water on your face. You feel on the verge of passing out as anxiety grips your throat and chest, making it hard to breathe.

Quick but soft knocks at the door break you out of your panic attack, and Umemiya’s soothing voice reaches you, “Y/N, my friends are here. Are you ok, babe?”

You are not ok.

You’ve been dating Umemiya for months, and everything had been perfect until he planned a meet-n-greet with his friends. Residual insecurity from partners who were cruel after their friends disapproved of you and what you looked like set you into a spiral that you couldn’t break out of.

But it’s now or never.

You pull open the door and give him your best attempt at a smile for someone who was just having a panic attack in a public restroom.

Umemiya knows exactly what’s going through your mind without you having to say it, and despite his constant praise of you, he understands that sometimes actions are far more effective.

He grabs you by the hand and pulls you into the central area of the cafe, where all of his friends sit. You want to crawl into yourself as all eyes are on you, but before you shut down, Umemiya speaks first.

“Guys! This is my girlfriend, Y/N. Please don’t embarrass me in front of her; she thinks I’m cool.” 

Hiragi offers a kind smile, “Well, she’s going to be disappointed because there’s not a cool bone in your body. Nice to me ya, Y/N. He talks about you all the time.”

Your eyes get wide as you look up at a blushing Umemiya. 

“Really?”

Someone you recognize as Tsubakino chimes in, “All the time, and who can blame him when you’re so cute?”

“Hey, guys, leave the complimenting my girl to me, please. Not trying to have you steal her.”

You feel Umemiya’s hand squeeze yours, and your shoulders relax as you wonder what you were worrying about to begin with.

Toma Hiragi 

Hiragi sighs heavily as he listens to the continuous chatter of Umemiya who is giving a long-winded update on the state of horticulture efforts across North America. It’s a random topic, but Umemiya is in hyperfixation mode, and there’s no stopping him once he gets started.

You’re sitting with them, trying not to let your mind wander in case there’s a pop-quiz on the subject.

Hiragi looks at you and rolls his eyes with a smile; you manage a barely silent giggle in return.

Twenty minutes pass, and the torture ends; as Umemiya squeezes out of the booth and you stand up to allow him to pass, Hiragi follows suit, placing a hand on your stomach and giving the soft flesh a gentle squeeze almost on instinct.

Your face heats up because surely Umemiya saw that, but if he did, he says nothing as he waves goodbye to you both.

You quickly turn to Hiragi once Ume is out of sight, “Toma! Why’d you do that!?”

His brows furrow in confusion at your sudden outburst, “do what?”

“You grabbed my stomach in front of Ume and it was NOT an innocent grab!”

“There you go, being a pain in my ass again. What are you talking about? Ume knows you’re curvy, everyone knows, and I’ll be damned if I let you police my squeezing of you in public.”

“You are an undeniable pervert that should be on a list with other perverts!”

He shakes his head and pulls out his gas-kun10. For someone that he loves beyond a shadow of a doubt, you still somehow manage to stimulate the wrath of his poor digestive system.

“You owe me for that smart-ass remark, girl. You can sit on my-”

“TOMA!”

[mythicmanuscripts]

Hi! I love your blog so much. I'm literally obsessed! I've wanted sub aemond content for so long and your account is like an oasis in the desert.

I was thinking about aemond and how for so long he felt unwanted and unloved, like he didn't have a place among his family. Because of this I think he'd really like reader telling him "Your mine", even more so than being told "im yours". Not in a aggressive or possessive way (although I do think he'd like reader being protective of him) but in the sense that someone loves him so much that they would openly claim him as theirs. That they aren't ashamed of him or for others to know he's all theirs.

I also think it provides him some sense of security. Like he feels so safe knowing he belongs to you so he doesn't have to worry about anyone else.

Idk if this makes sense, hopefully it does😭I just can't stop thinking about this, I've had it on my mind for a while now.

Oh my god I love this!!! This is so perfect everything you wrote here is incredible.

There’s nothing explicit in my answer but it is very clearly sub!Aemond and has some suggestive tones so I’ll hide it under the cut just in case :))

So I think Aemond really struggles with the idea of being anyone’s first choice? He grew up as a second son, always teased and mocked and never taken seriously. He didn’t expect you to be any different.

The first thing you do that really shows Aemond how much you care for him is just how loyal you are? I’m thinking of a situation where you and your family are at the red keep to look for a husband for you, and obviously your family are trying their hardest to secure an betrothal from Aegon because he’s king.

But then Aemond catches your eye? You end up having a very simple conversations with him, and you know pretty much instantly that he’s the one you want. Aemond wants you too of course. He hasn’t felt this accepted in his life and he absolutely loves talking with you. You and him sit together at the far end of the table every dinner, taking amongst yourselves and Aemond doesn’t even acknowledge anyone else. He takes every scrap of your attention that he can, especially because he’s so certain that your parents are angling for Aegon and that once the betrothal is announced he won’t be able to spend time with you like this again.

You put a spanner in the works. After a few weeks at the red keep you tell your family in no uncertain terms that you want Aemond and Aemond only. Your family is hesitant, both because Aemond is the second son and because Aemond is known to be violent and cold.

But you insist.

When your parents go to Aemond to tell him that you have expressed your desire to marry him instead of Aegon, the poor lad just about feints. He says he would be honoured of course, and then the moment they leave he’s sprinting across the castle to your quarters.

You’re confused to see him knocking on your door. You know you shouldn’t open the door because people might see and rumours may start but you couldn’t care less. He is here, so you will let him in.

At first you actually think he looks upset? When you ask what’s going on he just softly asks, “Do you really want me? Did you mean it when you told your parents I was your first choice?”

You don’t even get to finish the word “yes” before he’s barrelling forwards and pulling you into a tight hug. He buries his head in your shoulder and clings to you. He’s so overwhelmed to hear that someone actually chooses him, never mind it being someone he already wishes he could marry.

You hug him back of course, and then when you try to pull away he just grips you tighter. It's like he's afraid if he lets go of you that you'll disappear. You end up having to just rub his back and whisper that you mean it, that you aren't going anywhere.

Aemond truly doesn’t even know what to do with himself when you tell him that you never even considered Aegon, from the moment you saw him no one else came close.

This is definitely where the possessiveness comes in, because there’d be a period between expressing this and actually having the betrothal ironed out and announced.

Until then, all the other male suiters try to get your attention and win your love and it drives Aemond absolutely insane. You actually have to watch him very closely or else he will lure a suitor into the gardens and kill them. He’s threatens to plenty of times.

A big part of this possessive comes from the fact that he honestly is just waiting for the other shoe to drop? He’s so certain that one day you'll wake up and realise what a terrible decision you've made and beg for the betrothal to be canceled.

So every time you talk to another man, he's so so convinced you'll prefer them and tell him that you don't want him anymore. Which is why he absolutely hates seeing you with other people because he thinks every time he's losing his chance.

And so every time you walk back to him and tell him that you can't wait for your parents to officially announce the betrothal he nearly starts crying. He's watching you choose him over and over again and he truly cannot believe it.

As much as he's very traditional and respectful, I think he kinda just falls apart when faced with the fact that you genuinely want him? He tell himself he'll do this the right way, the way that's expected of him but he can't control himself when he's faced with the reality that you actually genuinely want him.

I don't think you two would be able to wait until marriage for that exact reason. He cannot stand the thought of another even considering being with you and honestly he can't even sleep thinking about it.

He ends up knocking on your door most nights and spending hours with you. He can't get enough of you, and he especially can't get enough of hearing you say you love him and want him. How could he ever be expected to spend the night alone knowing that a few floors down there's a woman he absolutely adores who will open her door and let him cuddle her and hear about her day?

He cannot be expected to spend the nights alone and to watch you speak to others and to wait patiently until the betrothal is announced. He never expected to find someone who makes him feel loved and safe and now that he has found you he will never ever let you go.

[just-zy]

You said you'd wait

pairing: Jenna Ortega x Fem Reader!

summary: A failed courtingship leads to heartache, days, weeks, months.. I hope you waited like you said you would.

A/N: your pov, first person idk yes ok, dk what I'm doing, u can guess if it's angst or not.. I hope y'all get this, it's absolutely nonsense wtf, Im tired

Warnings!: uh yes, sad yes, happy idk.. short ahh imagine

Masterlist

Whenever I think about love, the first thing that comes to mind are my failed relationships, was that why I felt bad? Maybe I'd just found reasons to make you stop courting me, or even make you stop liking me. A part of me wanted us to work, I lied when I told my friends I didn't see myself in a relationship with you, I lied when I said I didn't feel an ounce of love for you. Whenever I'd pass by your room, I'd take a peak just in case you were there, just in case you were looking for me too.

Maybe I was wrong, maybe I do want you, but why did we have to end with me bad-mouthing you? I guess it triggered something in me, you showed no respect for my boundaries, so I left. That was the first red flag you showed, then I left, what was the point of making you court me anyway? Was it for the thrill? The thrill that I didn't need? I might just be full of myself, really.

Come back to me.

"What's up with her?"

"Oh, heard she made Jenna stop courting her."

"You're kidding. How can she say no to The Jenna Ortega??"

For some reason, I hated hearing your name in the hallway, it reminds me of how bad I really seemed. Of how insensitive I was to you.

"Jenna's been awfully stressed lately."

"Might be that girl she last talked to.."

Oh, I hate hearing how bad you've gotten, even when I see you in the corner smiling and grinning like what we had was nothing.

I miss you..

"Do you think they'd miss eachother at the same time?"

"Hmm, sometimes. Jenna's doing okay now anyways, so that doesn't matter."

Were you over me? Over us? I hoped you'd keep your promise when you said you'd wait, I wish you had, gosh I wish you did.

"Bro, I heard someone's trynna make a move on Jenna."

"Seriously? Did Jenna say yes??"

"I think so!"

I saw you walking up to his car for a drive, did you think about me when you got in? When you locked eyes with him? Where was I? Where did I stand with you?

I never had the chance to call you mine.

If it's still an option, I hope it can happen now.

[koolades-world]

Hihihihi, in case ya remember me, im the Pain-sensitive anon, and in case i will request again remember me as BigS, because my requests are as big as my S, but enough about that.

Poor you, so many requests. Drink water, be stronger that those 637181 requests, don't let them kill you!!!

But im here to torture you with another one~

So i have an album with 3814 Asmodeus screenshots(I FKIN LOVE MY BOYFRIEND!!!), and i had an idea "dam, if Asmo became real, it would be very hard to explain why i have 4k pics with him... " So here is request!

Brothers, finding out that MC's new hyperfixation is... them?

Apparently MC is neurodivergent or something like that, and as many neurodivergent ppl, they have a hyperfixation! They just randomly becoming very interested in something specific and collect stuff with it, talk with everyone about it, and remember every single detail about it! Like Levi with TSL.

But one day, brothers realise that MC stopped talking about their past fixation and was less interested with it. They think that "Oh, they probably just found something new!". But one day, they take MC's phone just to find that... They have a giant album in their gallery that is dedicated only to him????

The album has every photo he posted on Devilgram, every photo that he send MC, some unique photos that MC shooted themselves, even some chat screenshots with times when he said something cute to them! They even was photographing thigs that "reminds of him". Like some cheeseburger with "Beel vibes", Blue flower that "Looks like Luci" or gorgeous mannequin that "feels like Asmo".

If its someone like Asmo, he would also notice thta MC started buying their fanclub's merch! Like "Asmo lover #1" shirt or "Lucifer best man!!"cup(Luci is very popular, he probably also has some fanclubs! i hate this guy tho)

I think Levi and Mammon would die from embarrassment. Asmo would die out of happiness and Satan with Luci will try to pretend like thay never saw that. and idk about other ones. :P

I think that would make a cute fluff and a very scary situation if it was real uwu

Thats all

Have a nice dayyyyyyyyyyyy~~~

-BigS aka.AlgophobicDude

hey! great to hear from you again :)

haha thank you! been slowly knocking out requests one at a time and let me tell you it's a lot more fun than it might look haha

i wrote this while wearing a pink cowboy hat. i just wanted to share that

you got it! enjoy!!

Mc with a hyperfixation on the brothers

Lucifer

is this a human thing?

he's happy to indulge you as long as you're not too loud about it out in public

especially please don't share those pictures with anyone, like mammon. he will sell those, especially the ones he only intends for you. please

he's happy you don't hate him, actually. you make this old man very happy haha

Mammon

he would never tell you, but he's also got a photo album dedicated to you

also has a note on his D.D.D. full of all the things he never said to you but hopes to be brave enough to one day to tell you

he doesn't tell you he's got that though, not in a million years

he really loves that you're hyperfixated on him because that just means you care about him just as much as he cares about you

Levi

as expected, he's very flustered

he knows what it's like to have a little blorbo and he would give anything to be able to see them daily in person and live with them

he's over the moon once he realizes this and despite his embarrassment, he pushed through to spend more time with you

he's so dedicated <3

Satan

he's probably the most puzzled

he's always learning new things about humans even when he thought he knew everything

he knows and trusts you so from time to time, he'll take a picture with you in mind that he knows will remind you of him

all in all, he does think it's a little strange but won't stop you since he's never seen you happier

Asmo

like they said, you're literally about to become the number one member of his fanclub!

lucky for you, once he finds your asmo photo album, he's feeding into your hyperfixation

you get lots of exclusive privileges, such as early morning selfies and all his merch for free, including prototypes

he's always ready to pose for a picture for you. every side is his good side!

Beel

he's a little confused but he's happy to make you happy

he listened to you talk about your hyperfixations the most beside levi so he's quick to pick up on this shift

to make you happy, he decides to make a handmade adult bib just for you haha and at first he's a little sad but then he finds it while digging for your snack stash

you've never worn it once because it's hanging in your closet next to your fancy outfits <3

Belphie

you what? is his initial reaction

from the outside, it seems like it doesn't bother him or that he could care less

but, on the inside, he's elated since he thought after how he tricked you, you'd never want to be close to him again

now, you're the very thing that makes you excited to wake up every morning by his side

[zhxngii]

Alhaitham & Blade having a crush on you

❏ ( notes ) ; This is my gift for @yanqingisim for the Secret Santa event by @solarisfortuneia, I hope you enjoy it &lt;3 ❏ ( contents ) ; PURE FLUFF! might be a bit of angst idk (surprise surprise.) , i tried to write these two tropes and I hope I did them well... sdjkhklasdme.

As Alhaitham's study buddy/research partner, he has a small (big) crush on you but doesn't know how you feel about him so he resorts to hiding his feelings.

How did he fall for you?

All it took was you truly being yourself around him. Usually, when he finishes a project with someone, he'd often hear them complain about how awkward it might've been or something along the lines of how frustrating his personality was... not that he cared though because in the end the project's done and he won't likely see them much.

You on the other hand... were a different case. He took note of how you tried to understand his side of things, not only yours, and how you tried your best to work with him despite how difficult or tiring it might've been. One thing he noticed was how determined you were with your research, and he found that attractive about you.

There used to be a point where he preferred to be alone but... you slowly became an exception as you two partnered up more.

What he does differently that gets your attention.

Alhaitham would eventually become aware of his feelings towards you, but isn't sure how you feel about him, so he'll keep it hidden away and to himself. Though, there will be a time he can't possibly just hide it anymore so what does he do?

He'll often start doing small things such as bringing his and your favorite snacks when you both take a break from all the work you've done so far. You wonder how he knew exactly what you liked and wanted at the moment at he just simply brushes it off by saying he just guessed... when really he took mental note of what you'd bring with you whenever you were with him.

Whenever you happened to catch him during his break, he puts his book down. Doesn't seem like such a big deal but... with anyone else, he wouldn't do as much as to spare a glance at them. He'd keep his eyes glued to the page he was on, not showing any bit of interest in the conversation that started with him since he wanted to be left alone already. But with you? The book can wait. You could've sworn that his eyes almost sparkle in a way whenever he looks up to see you.

Something cute he does.

Whenever you'd tell him a joke, he'll blush when you giggle at him. You find it adorable how when he doesn't get a joke, he'll often take it seriously and give such a long, textbook-based explanation. Once you explain to him, a look of embarrassment comes to his face but he'll laugh along with you at his own seriousness.

Blade's partner but the problem is that you two don't necessarily get along, he ends up developing a small crush on you, or rather a partnership as he would say in the long run.

How does he fall for you?

Blade wasn't very fond of you, the second he saw you he just didn't want you getting in his way of work. It didn't help how you two were often paired up with each other, on every mission no matter big or small, you two somehow were always stuck together.

He was always quite hard on you as your superior and he knew just how much you disliked him for how he treats you but the second you get injured... he gets worried sick. He knew you were strong on your own but knowing your clumsiness, he had to keep a close eye on you.

He's never once felt such the need to protect someone before, he thought it was just the way of a superior looking after the junior but... boy was he wrong. Soon it became more than just that kind of relationship between you two.

What he does differently that gets your attention.

He tends your injuries himself. Usually, he'd let someone else handle it, but he'd just do it himself as he wanted you to rest and be in bed as soon as possible. You didn't know how good he was at this kind of thing until that day.

He often holds your hand, leading your around with his hands tight around yours and the hilt of his sword. His excuse is that he wants to make sure you stay close to him and don't get lost, but in reality, he just wants to feel your hand in his. He'll give it a nice, firm squeeze from time to time, sometimes holding it longer than he intended.

He gives you small gifts of treats and items so you can take care of yourself when you both complete your tasks. Though he's the one that's literally helping you, he doesn't mind giving you a reward of such from time to time especially when the mission happened to take a toll on the both of you.

Something cute he does.

He becomes softer with you when it comes to winding down and relaxing, he'll take part in the little activities you enjoy even though it may seem totally out of his character but he's willing to enjoy it with you.

He'll even do such things as give you a nice hug, though the hug was mostly so he could enjoy your embrace around him as he relaxes into your arms. He loves the times like this when he can just be comfortable with you and not have to worry about being such a tough guy.

[sundrop-writes]

hiya! Might be a bit broad of a request but could I get headcanons with jj x autistic female reader ?

Broad in the sense if I could get hcs of her reacting to reader with autism, how she helps reader with overstimulation and struggling with social cues and noise. If you wanna throw in smut hcs (jj being the dom) i’m also fine with that!

Basically anything with jj and autistic female reader, thanks!

I love this request so much!!! If you want smut/smutty hcs with JJ and autistic reader, definitely feel free to send in a separate request - I will come back for that in another post. For now, I hope you enjoy this!!

Requests are currently - OPEN.

Jennifer Jareau x Fem!Autistic!Reader (Headcanons)

(Warnings: typical CM themes, the reader is described as touch avoidant (with some exceptions); mentions of molestation and murder (related to a case, mentioned in passing); mentions of blood, mentions of someone being shot in the reader's presence. Idk, I don't think there's anything else. Not proofread.)

JJ was raised around everything (neuro)typical, so when she meets you, she doesn't quite get you. Not at first.

You are one of the smartest people on the team - that is why you're there. Your ability to pick up on patterns and bits of detail that others don't see is incredible, and your brain holds mass amounts of obscure information that she could never even dream of knowing.

But you are quirky. More than quirky.

You have difficulty making eye contact, you freak out if someone even motions toward touching you unexpectedly, you have very odd, specific little rituals with your snacks and meals (which JJ does come to find endearing over time) - you go from talking at incredibly fast speeds, blabbering out information to being silent and stoic for long periods of time.

When she finds out that you have autism, she is a bit surprised. She is one of those people who thinks that autism is a disorder related to school aged boys - but you explain to her how it affects your life. How it makes it difficult for you to relate to people, form close friendships, how it's difficult for you to focus on larger 'important' things when smaller details are bothering you.

(It's one of the reasons you're so good at your job - but it also makes it hard to focus on people's words if their shirt is wrinkled and it's distracting you.)

You act cold toward most people on the team, and it's one random day that JJ finally starts to figure you out. A day that you finally warm up to her.

You were helping Morgan escort a suspect out of the police station, to a squad car where he would be driven to jail to be processed. He had confessed to molesting and killing eight boys after being caught with a ninth, and when the father of one of the boys heard the BAU had arrested someone, he came to the police station with a gun.

When the suspect was shot, you were covered in his blood, and in horrible shock from hearing such a loud bang right beside your ear - from feeling the sudden dead weight drop in your arms.

You ran back into the station screaming, and JJ followed her instinct - followed you into the women's washroom, wanting to see if you had been hurt. She was surprised to see you pacing back and forth in front of the sinks, muttering something under your breath.

"L/N." She called out your name, trying to get your attention. "Y/N? Y/N? Hey? Are you hurt?"

You didn't look up, not for a second. But your muttering became louder. And it became more clear what you were saying.

"My pen, my pen, I dropped my pen..."

JJ had no clue why you were so concerned about a pen when you were covered in someone else's blood, your ears likely still ringing from the gunshot - but she knew that you had a pen-clicking habit. It was something that often annoyed Reid and Morgan - but from what she had observed, you did your best work when your thumb was twiddling, clicking the end of your pen insistently. It meant your brain was whirring hard, putting the pieces of the puzzle together.

JJ reached into the breast pocket of her blazer, and took out a pen that clicked on the end.

"Here." She offered it out to you. "You - you can borrow my pen." She said shyly, hoping it would help you calm down.

You extended out a shaking hand, and took the pen, and then began to click it harshly with your thumb. You gripped it so furiously, the skin around your knuckles so tight - but after a moment, you let out a tight breath. And then, for the first time since she had known you - you looked JJ in the eye.

"Thank you." You murmured, your voice ripe with tears.

"Keep the pen." JJ told you, feeling like it was a small consolation if it helped you calm down this much.

You reached up, petting a shaking hand over your face, and pulled back in disgust when you felt the sticky blood.

"Let me help you clean up." JJ said, grabbing some paper towels out of the dispenser and wetting them in the sink.

It was the first time you had ever let her touch you - you clicked the pen the whole time, and from then on, that sound became less of an annoyance and more of a comfort to her.

That was the day she realised one incredibly important thing:

To you, small things matter on such a big scale.

Coffee in your favourite mug instead of a random one she found in the back of the cupboard - that gets a smile out of you. Scones with blueberries instead of raisins - raisins get a shrug at best, blueberries get a giggle and a big 'thank you!'. Organising your files in alphabetical order instead of by date.

You and JJ became close after that day.

She wasn't a profiler, not in training, but she learned to read you like a book.

She knew that you bouncing your knee aggressively meant that you were becoming overstimulated - things in the room too loud, the florescents too bright, the day too overwhelming.

When this happened, she would take you outside for a break - often siting that she herself needed some air and she simply wanted your company. She knew you didn't like to be outwardly babied (who does?), but she also knew that you had a hard time self regulating. You had a hard time deciding when to take yourself out for a break, and if you didn't have one, then you would become irritable, have a hard time focusing, and hardly get any work done.

She also picked up on the fact that you just plain didn't get sarcasm.

Before, she thought you were being cool, or aloof. When someone said something sarcastic and you didn't understand, she thought that you were pretending not to get it in order to snub them or make a joke out of the whole thing.

But during one of your many conversations, you told her that you absolutely didn't understand sarcasm - you didn't get when someone was using a sarcastic tone, and you often took everything people said in its most literal interpretation.

So you and JJ developed a wonderful, silent system - if someone said something and you didn't understand if it was sarcasm right off the bat, you looked to her, and she would nod at you if they were being sarcastic, or shake her head if they were being literal. It was something people on the team picked up on, but nobody said anything about it - they just enjoyed the way you bonded with her, and how your quirky habits were spreading like a delightful little plague.

JJ knew that your life wasn't easy, living with autism, but she always tried to make it a bit easier. Because you were worth it.

Criminal Minds Masterlist

[coffeegnomee]

have you seen the conversation between kab & zam from yesterday yet :? i'd be so curious to hear your take on the whole thing. i like that kab is someone who will have a conversation like that in the first place, and i'm really interested in the potential of her interacting with zam in ways that might force her to confront the assumptions she's made about lifesteal (both in a roleplay-style way and an understanding the people on the server way, but admittedly i mostly want meta-conflict...) so i was kinda delighted by it. and her revealing so much about said assumptions, her own thought processes, her blind spots, in an attempt to reveal very little actual information. bacon's "training" as a little microcosm of how she reacts to problems she can't predict or control. all in all she frustrates me but in a fun way here, i like being frustrated.

I got so invested and stayed up so late taking notes. I'm writing this before watching the rest of Zam's stream and Kab's stream from yesterday, basically just looking at the conversation itself. Because oh boy that was fascinating. What a creature. 

Overall, what I’ve gathered from Kab, is a massive tendency to radically prioritize her own personal experiences with a person (one on one, face to face) over observing them through other people’s eyes and seeing how they act to other people (like through watching streams s4 and 5 or just through yt videos) and especially over what other people’s opinions are of other people. 

So it was super fascinating for her to get so excited about Zam being a wealth of information, because she observed with her own eyes that he understands people. So she now can categorize Zam in this way.  

But idk how much of what Zam said about like Mapicc and Spoke will matter in her future interactions with them, given how she accepted it, but then minutes later would not take correction when she had her own opinions on Bacon that differed from Zam’s observations. 

So like, she only, practically, gained insight on Zam. That is the only flask she is filling rn. 

I saw a bunch of people wonder what Kab exactly learned from that conversation and idk how much any of yall have been keeping up with her streams, but Kab learned A LOT from that conversation. (I might pull everything she learned in a different post. It’s not super relevant here)

Like you don't understand how little she knows about Lifestealers. I know, it’s shocking given we all saw her in chat all of s4 and most of s5.

She went on Bacon’s stream (and her’s ig) a bit ago the day they turned the field purple and said she only followed Eclipse, it was the only arc she actually followed as it came out, and then she kind of stopped paying attention. Which is why she would not realize how wild it was to say “princezam! You could create world peace on lifesteal!” as if she didn’t understand the Joker arc was PrinceZam objecting to pb&j trying to bring world peace to lifesteal. No Clowpierce needed.

And like if she ONLY saw Zam in the Eclipse arc, lowkey she could conclude that he is spineless. She just never saw the shift we’ve been watching since Eclipse.

Now I have another theory, but I might be totally wrong in this, but in a potentially 2% chance universe Kab is playing around with the concept of player knowledge vs character knowledge. Like everything she knew from before Lifesteal is off limits and she can only use knowledge she gains since being in the discord and on the server itself. 

And in this case she would be embracing the purity of rp content to the max. 

In which case she would need Zam to spell out how the Joker arc influenced his pacifism arc or she can’t use that info. 

It is a completely overly charitable concept I think, but nonetheless interesting. I could go into a full on Kenadian joking that Omziscool has dementia arc. But instead of dementia she is secretly incredible at acting. Or I could conclude that it is what it looks like, and Kab simply doesn’t remember anything she learned before Lifesteal/never bothered to pay attention bc she was never going to get on this server anyway.

And anyway, she clearly is using previous knowledge about Clown, Ash, and Squiddo, and she uses OOC knowledge all the time, getting in discord vcs and asking questions about server plans and using that knowledge for herself (mane in her video, red and woogie being teamed in this convo, etc). So I don’t think it can be concluded to be character knowledge vs player. But I find the thought interesting. 

But that brings me back to my point about prioritizing the knowledge she gains through person to person interactions: she only can analyze Clown, Ash and Squiddo so well because she knows them in person so well. 

And she doesn’t have that with literally anyone else on the server. Not even Zam or Red. I can’t remember if she talked to anyone else for any meaningful period of time other than them before joining. But clearly, CAS are only the three she knows well enough to have a good take on their personalities. 

And it is a good take, she does analyze CAS in ways I would approve of. She does genuinely have a good understanding of their motivations and personalities. So she is capable of having good takes.

But as we saw in the convo, it doesn’t yet extend past them. 

So what this means is (rn imo) I think more conversations with Zam will prove extremely interesting, but unfortunately only realistically in terms of her understanding of him and not in her learning and growing in understanding of how lifesteal works and how other members work.

Like I would love to see a Spoke and Kab conversation. I have soo many theories on how Spoke would react. But she would not learn (and therefore agree with Zam's take) that he is the master manipulator until the arc was well past and done. He does nawt spill his secrets at all. Zam spills that. So (imo rn) even if she did have a convo with Spoke, that would give her one-on-one info but she would conclude that he is a bumbling moron who has no motivations and doesn't think past the present moment. Because that’s who he pretends to be. And she takes people for their literal words until they say otherwise.

BUT! Interestingly enough she does learn well. Something I noticed through her pov of the Bacon jumpings is that she was super caught up in how unfair it was and getting pissed off at Bacon because he didn't explain why he was jumping her randomly. Because she needs someone to say word for word why they are doing something in order for her to understand.

And I think we saw this in this convo, the more Zam told her word-for-word his mentality, the more she noted it and she asked follow up questions and clarifying questions and I think noted them down rightly (maybe not tho I haven’t watched yesterday’s stream) 

And earlier, if you watched her/bacon streams that day, that was the first time Bacon said word for word the difference between practicing on pvp legacy and why it differs from fights on lifesteal and why that matters. And so therefore why him jumping her is helpful, not pointless, as she kept saying over and over. And she acquiesced to his analysis. And could only reiterate that she asks he doesn't do it when she’s lagging. 

She didn’t sound like that to Zam in the convo, but that’s bc she was trying to hide that for manipulation purposes. Even if... Whatever. It doesn't matter that it was silly and didn’t do anything meaningful, that was her using manipulation and secrecy. 

Anyway, her main sticking point the first day Bacon jumped her was (9/21 ~1:00:00)  “This feels like the most inefficient way of training though. Cause he didn't tell me what to do he just started attacking me” She wants to be told what to do first so she can internalize it. She doesn't logic out a reason based on input, she needs to be told. 

This is why I think she will ultimately be okay, she just needs a shit load of conversations like this one with Zam. Though we will need to wait and see what she actually learns (like after the season is over), but in the meantime interesting conversations for sure. 

What she will hopefully learn is that Zam freely gives out general server information all the damn time, and is always willing to talk about people’s past seasons mentalities. He loves yapping analysis.

So if she ever tries to go into a conversation withOUT obvious sus and pointed questions like she keeps doing with Zam, maybe she'll lean that she doesn't need them for him. It’s like she’s trying so hard to sound so casual about asking questions but that is just NOT necessary with Zam. He will just tell you shit, that's who he is. 

But, she did pick up on that if she asks too much about Zam’s inner mentality about current arcs he clams right up. (even though, again, if she watched his streams in the past she should understand him.) But that doesn't stop her from pushing to learn

But he is sooo uncomfortable about talking about why he does stuff in the moment. Like Planet had to work so hard s4 to get Zam’s trust and he almost got to know Zam’s wormhole day motivations about making everyone hate him, and in hating him the server members would bond together which was a good thing. But Spoke interrupted and Planet never got to know. It is a workout to get Zam to actually leak his mentality, and his mentality is the only thing he really truly cares about. Everything else is just whatever. 

But she incorrectly thinks that flattery and apology will be the way to get him to open up.

But either way it is great bc Zam, and Bacon too tbh, freely give out advice about other server members and how lifesteal works. Because they understand that it is in everyone’s best interests if they learn how this server does work and how the players think because that can only help smooth things over and get good interactions. She just doesn’t realize how /genuine they are being in that moment and takes it more as them leaking super secret information. When they’re just like, 'please learn, i beg.'

In terms of confronting role-play style and how the server lives and exists. Kab made HUGE progress.

If you didn't watch until the end of her stream, Kab had initially planned to murder Zam at the end of that convo but changed her mind bc of what happened. 

Like she said in the flower field that she wanted to “do lore” with Zam to do before session and make him not trust her anymore. And in the end she reveals that "lore" was just murdering him.

She tends, like she did with the consequences arc, to plan shit out and then execute that plan. Bc she’s a scripted lore server girl. 

But in this conversation she, in real time, adjusted her plan based on the unscripted conversation that flowed from it. Which is huge news for lifesteal enjoyers. If she can learn to embrace this we will be eating well. And that can only come through practice.

From a PrinceZam analysis, we got to see him go to work and try to get information from Kab. She leaked a lot, but he really does need the practice on extracting info, he's been talking about it a lot, and she’s a great subject to practice on. 

So I am very excited for him to get that practice in future conversations. 

And Zam does try several different approaches, feigned indifference, just asking, comforting lie that he wont tell anyone the secret is safe with him, pretending to only be interested in one thing instead of everything, asking direct questions that she must confirm or deny which should give him info either way, asking for the favor out of friendship, asking for the favor out of the continued exchange of information, asking for the favor out of her not having given as much as he had given, playing for the ego that if it’s so bad you can’t tell me it must be really bad so you want to tell me, asking over and over.

She for her part only knows flattery, apology, and the placation of emotions to make you think you don’t want to know the information anyway or because you react too strongly and it wouldn't be healthy for you to know. 

The most interesting analysis is how at the very very end of her stream she said “I’ve giving him a warning that I’m going to fuck with some stuff so he shouldn’t.. He shouldn’t label that as me betraying him” 

Whichhhhhhh is hilarious because we all know ends only in one way. But that is shocking bc this was his fundamental reason for betraying Eclipse was bc they thought this way?? Like Vi and Subz thought if they were subtle and slow and give him warning about the wormhole, that he wouldn’t take that as a betrayal. But he did. So he betrayed outright. To like, oversimplify it. But basically, warning Zam does absolutely nothing to protect yourself from him ending the relationship when you do something new that is not aligned with his morals/thoughts/desires. 

So so so interesting how she has that viewpoint if she did watch Eclipse.

Oh! Final thought that might go more into the meta-conflict side of things. I think we don’t get that much meta-conflict in a similar way to how it was with Vi or Minute and Jumper and Pentar last season. Idk hot to describe it exactly.

It might not be quite what meta-conflict means, but like how Kab stops all lore to cause conflict based on what conflict was presented to her.

Kab has a massive tendency to use embarrassment and shame as an attack when she feels unsafe or embarrassed. Like she will instantaneously go for causing you embarrassment and making you feel bad for your choices whenever she feels threatened in order to make you back off. 

Like when she said: “and zam, this is the person you’re friends with?”

But she goes for the throat like this a ton, like with Bacon this stream going towards a consent argument to make him feel incredibly awkward and that he will back off from jumping her instead of risking saying 'no does not mean no'.  

There were other times in earlier streams that idk if I can remember them, but it’s happened a lot with Woogie and Bacon whenever they imply that they have doubts that her plan will work, she takes it almost as them saying they think she’s stupid. And she reacts very aggressively and makes it about meta stuff instead of on the server stuff.

What I do find fascinating is how Bacon, in three streams or so, has already learned how to give her critiques on her plans so that she doesn’t get offended and that she instead learns his thought process and is the one to back down. He is learning quickly.

Also I just realized JUST how much analyzing lifestealers feels like completing those logic puzzels where you have to figure out who has what item and what location or whatever and you get like five clues. No wonder I love this shit so much.

[bosbas]

Chapter 12: did you wish you'd put up more of a fight?

series masterlist previous part || next part

pairing: benedict bridgerton x best friend!fem!reader WC: 4.1k words

Warnings: period-typical gender roles, idiots in love being idiots in love, mutual pining, physical altercation (nothing serious but a few mentions of blood), mentions of sex if you squint, benedict being so so stupid

Summary: You and Benedict have been best friends since childhood, but things change dramatically once you come out in society. You’re struggling to find someone you’re as compatible with and who knows you as well as Benedict, all while trying to quell your ever-growing feelings for him. Shenanigans ensue.

A/N: guys idk anything about physical fights sorry if this is super unrealistic LMAO

August 12, 1814 - But, dear reader, I cannot fail to mention the upcoming gathering hosted by the Bridgertons at Aubrey Hall. Those lucky enough to receive an invitation are surely busy preparing for the eventful trip ahead. Every year, the Bridgerton country party proves to be an excellent hunting ground for ambitious mamas with daughters of marriageable age. Will this year's party bring forth new proposals? Whispers around the ton indicate that a certain Bridgerton brother might propose to Miss Y/N Beaumont, and that would certainly be the news of the season. Fear not, for this author shall keep the ton abreast of any and all developments.

"I beg your pardon?" he spoke, tone low and venomous as he breathed heavily. "What the bloody hell did you just say?"

Benedict saw you exchange a nervous glance with his older brother and his blood boiled at the sight. It was him you should be exchanging glances with. Not Anthony, of all people. He could hardly believe it. In fact, he didn't believe it at all. This had to be some sick joke, some cruel prank that you and his brothers and perhaps even your brothers had all been in on to rag on him for disappearing to the countryside for a month and a half. He desperately wanted you to burst out laughing and start making fun of him for believing that you and Anthony were to get married. But as the seconds ticked by, it became more and more unlikely that this was the case.

Interrupting your prolonged eye contact with Anthony, you looked down at your hands anxiously. This was not how it was supposed to go. There was no nature walk, no time alone with Ben, just an angry Benedict standing at the door to Anthony's study, waves of fury rolling off of him. A small part of you had hoped he would be angry, yes, but now that you were seeing him, unmoving, you wanted nothing more than to disappear from the room. You wished Ben had come ten minutes earlier, where you would have greeted him with a hug instead, feeling his strong arms make themselves at home as they wrapped around you. Benedict was not often angry, especially not at you, but when he was, he usually voiced his displeasure quite loudly to anyone who would listen. However, knowing he was standing there, stock-still and seething, you weren't quite sure how he was going to react.

"How much of that did you hear, exactly?" you asked meekly, trying to gauge how much damage control you would have to do. You kept your gaze firmly on your hands, unable to meet his eyes and slightly fearful of his silent anger.

"Enough to know that my brother is the man you're marrying," Benedict responded, sounding angrier than he was when he first walked in, if that was possible. "I see it's been quite a productive season," he added in a clipped tone.

Your head snapped up at his last comment. You felt Anthony tense beside you as he felt your anger rising, but you didn't care. How dare Benedict blame you for finding a husband after he so unceremoniously walked away from you? Meeting Ben's intense gaze and flinching as you practically felt the daggers shooting from his eyes, you yelled back, "What did you expect, Benedict? You walked away from me and I did exactly what you wanted me to do. I found a husband. I don't know what more you want from me."

Try as you might to keep your voice strong, a wobble at the end had betrayed your true feelings. You had sounded more pleading than anything, but you were beyond caring. You were absolutely crushed, and you could see that Benedict was hurting as well. After years of looking into his eyes, you could recognize that he, too, was hiding sorrow behind his anger. Trying to remain composed, you bit the inside of your cheek as you felt Anthony reach over and place a comforting hand on your shoulder.

"I didn't–" started Benedict, unable to continue once he saw Anthony's hand on you. It was true, then. The courtship. Or the proposal. Or whatever else you two had been doing while he was in the countryside five seconds away from tearing his hair out in desperation because he loved you so much. Suddenly, it was difficult to remember why exactly he hadn't wanted to marry you. Marrying you couldn't have been worse than what he was feeling right now, the devastating realization of having truly lost you. Surely nothing could be worse than this.

Carrying the unspeakable grief that came with losing one's best friend and soulmate all in one evening, Benedict turned around to walk out of Anthony's office. He couldn't bear to be there any longer, watching the woman he loved be caressed by his brother. Without a second glance at the two of you, he closed the door behind him and made his way to his own room. He would have been better off going there in the first place, he thought. Then he could've had a few more moments of peace before he found out what you and Anthony had been up to in his absence.

Looking at the closed door, Anthony's hand dropped from your shoulder as he stood in shock at what had just happened. "Are you alright?" he asked you, knowing the answer but needing to reassure you anyway.

You shook your head, holding in tears that were threatening to spill. "Someone should go after him," you said pressing your fingers to the corner of your eyes. What you really meant was, you should go after him, Anthony, but you wanted to give him a chance to say no. To decide he wasn't going to clean up yet another mess you had made because of your stupid feelings for his brother.

But Anthony, ever the eldest child, nodded in agreement. "Just stay put for a bit while I get him into his room. I don't think it would be the best idea to have the two of you talk right now."

Aubrey Hall had already seen too much chaos today without what he expected was going to be a shouting match between you and Benedict. If only the shouting match could lead to the two of you realizing that you did, in fact, love each other very much and that you would, in fact, be very happily married. He gave you one last squeeze on the shoulder and took off determinedly to find his brother.

Benedict saw Anthony catching up to him out of the corner of his eye but didn't stop or slow down. He couldn't bear to stop now, he needed to get to his room. Or really anywhere that was stripped of every trace of you. Benedict could barely think, the moment when Anthony placed his hand on your shoulder replaying relentlessly through his mind and preventing him from thinking about anything else.

Feeling Anthony stop right behind him, Benedict turned around to face him. The two brothers stood, staring at each other, for several moments. Anthony trying to think of what to say and Benedict getting angrier by the second.

"If you had–" started Anthony, only to be cut off by Benedict immediately.

"How could you do this?" Ben shouted, voice raw from holding back the string of curses he wanted to direct at Anthony right now. Anthony bit his lip, grimacing. He knew Benedict would be mad, but he had been unprepared for the magnitude of his fury. In a way, he felt bad for Ben. Anthony could tell that you were the love of Benedict's life—it was ridiculously obvious—and it couldn't have been easy to see you with someone else. But enough was enough, and Anthony had seen you heartbroken for long enough to know that Ben had only brought this upon himself.

"Might I remind you that you left, Benedict? After she asked you to marry her, no less," shot back Anthony, arms crossed tightly over his chest. He could see Ben waver at his words, face blanching slightly at the realization that you had told Anthony about your quasi-proposal.

"And you think you're better than me? Anyone with half a brain knows you don't want to marry for love. Did that change in the last four weeks? Are you now suddenly unequivocally in love with her? Is that what happened?" asked Benedict, an unfathomable bitterness on his tongue. His words were mocking, but deep down he did want answers. Did you and Anthony really fall for each other while he was gone? Had he been that foolish, to ever imagine the possibility of having something beyond friendship with you when his older brother was right there?

Anthony rolled his eyes, "Come off it, Benedict. You can't play the victim every time. She's aware that I don't want to marry for love. After some very negative experiences with the men of the ton, you included, she's decided she is perfectly fine not marrying for love either." Seeing Benedict's brow furrow in protest, Anthony continued, "Honestly, I promise I didn't force her into anything, I only gave her the option. She decided all by herself that this was what she wanted. And if you'd stop being a prick for about two seconds you'd realize this is what's best for her, anyway. That I'm what's best for her." And sure, Anthony knew he had probably gone too far with his last comment, but Benedict was being incredibly frustrating at the minute that Anthony didn't care.

However, Benedict didn't want to stop being a prick for two seconds. Especially because you were about to get engaged to his brother, who was being a massive dick right now. So instead, he chose to give into his anger, pushing against Anthony's shoulders so he was knocked against the wall.

"That you're what's best for her?" he scoffed. "I've been best friends with her for two decades but suddenly you're the one who knows exactly what she needs? Seems quite logical," finished Ben, pure poison dripping from his voice.

Undeterred, Anthony pushed Benedict back. "What is so wrong about our courtship? You left her so she could find a husband and that's exactly. What. She. Did," he yelled, accentuating every word with a shove at Ben's shoulders, who responded by swatting his hands away.

"She was off limits, Anthony. You knew that! You never should've done that," cried Benedict, grabbing his brother by the collar, and growing more frustrated by the second. However, whether he was angrier at Anthony or himself was unclear.

Exasperated, the elder Bridgerton reached over to slap the side of Benedict's head. "Off limits? Why would she be off limits? She seemed pretty on limits when you said you couldn't marry her and fucked off to the countryside for half the season," came his response.

"Because she is my best friend," Benedict roared back. Hearing Anthony's mocking laugh brought out a level of anger Ben did not know existed within himself, and he found his fist flying to make contact with Anthony's mouth. Ignoring the metallic taste on his tongue, Anthony responded by kneeing Benedict in the groin until he doubled over and slammed the fist that had just hit him into the wall.

Ben cradled his hand against his side, wincing as he saw his grazed knuckles, but he was unrelenting. It was like all of the pent-up emotions of frustration and uselessness he had been feeling in the countryside were finally bubbling over now that he had someone to direct his anger toward. "Because she is my best friend and you know that I'm in love with her. I know you know, Anthony, you cannot pretend otherwise," he said, desperation evident in his voice.

Fairly done with the conversation and itching to go sort out his busted lip, Anthony tried to straighten out his collar as he spoke to Benedict, "Well, even if you are, it doesn't do her much good if you have no intention of marrying her, does it?"

Benedict was stunned to silence. Anthony was right, of course, but Ben couldn't find it in himself to concede to the man who was going to take away Benedict's best friend and the love of his life all in one go. So he just stared at his brother, breathing heavily and searching for words that would not give away just how destroyed he truly felt.

"I am proposing to her in a week. You have until then to fix this, otherwise, you will truly have lost her forever." And with that, Anthony walked off without a second glance, leaving Benedict to grapple with his thoughts.

Walking upstairs in search of something to stop the bleeding at his lip, Anthony couldn't believe that Benedict had admitted his feelings for you. The intensity of the argument between the two brothers had most likely been the catalyst for the confession, but Anthony hoped that this might be what allowed Ben to finally see right by you and love you the way he so obviously wanted to. Regardless, Anthony couldn't help the protective instinct that surged within him. He cared about you, and he was acutely aware of the heartbreak that awaited you if his brother didn't come to his senses.

Too caught up in his thoughts, Anthony missed your presence entirely as he made his way past your room. "Anthony, your lip!" you exclaimed as you closed your bedroom door behind you, bringing him out of his musings. He touched his hand to his injury, hissing in pain slightly as he was reminded of the blood coming out of his cut lip.

He waved his hand dismissively, "It's alright, just a scrape," he assured you.

You seemed doubtful but nodded anyway. "I was going to ask how your talk with him went but I think I have a very clear idea," you said, earning you a short laugh from Anthony.

He cleared his throat, looking at you up and down with a mix of concern and determination. The atmosphere in the room was heavy, charged with the aftermath of the confrontation with Benedict.

"Look, I gave you my word, and a gentleman's word is his bond. I fully intend to honor our agreement," Anthony began, his tone steady and resolute. "But, I also think it's crucial for both you and Benedict to have a conversation, to sort out feelings on both sides."

You looked at him nervously, not ready to confront your feelings for Benedict, let alone any that Benedict might have for you.

He gave you an encouraging smile. "If you decide you still want to marry me afterward, that's perfectly alright, and I'd be delighted to do so. But I think it's only fair that you both have a chance to speak your minds before we move forward." He met your eyes, sincerity evident in his gaze. "Talk to Benedict. I think he went to his studio. I'll give you both the time you need."

You knew he was right, unfortunately. So you nodded, giving him a grateful hug before he excused himself to go clean up his injury and you headed down the stairs to go look for Benedict.

---

In the solitude of his studio, Benedict wrestled with a storm of emotions he was feeling as he paced the room. He couldn't believe that he was going to lose you to his brother. Even if you and Anthony were not in love with each other now, it was only a matter of time, he reasoned. You were, at the very least, the most extraordinary woman he had ever encountered, and surely Anthony would see it that way eventually. Especially if the two of you had children. His heart dropped at the thought of you and Anthony in bed together, but he pushed the image away once he heard a knock on his studio door.

Seeing your face poke into the room, he couldn't help the butterflies that erupted in his stomach, even despite his tumultuous thoughts. "Well, hello," he greeted you curtly, lifting his hand to run his fingers through his hair nervously, knowing a difficult conversation awaited him.

But you gasped before you could respond, immediately distracted by his bloodied knuckles. "Benedict, what on earth...?" you trailed off as you rushed to grab his injured hand in both of yours.

Benedict's breath caught in his throat as he felt your hands on his. The tenderness with which you turned over his hand made a previously dormant warmth rise in his chest, and he bit his lip to keep from shivering. You looked so beautiful, face pinched in focus as you ran your finger over his injury, and he inhaled sharply as your finger traced over his open wound.

"So this is what you and Anthony were doing instead of talking, then?" you scolded, looking into his eyes but not letting go of his hand. It didn't matter that you were still furious with him, it felt too good to have the heavy weight of his fingers half-intertwined with yours after so long of having him away.

"It's nothing," Benedict responded, shaking his head. Then, remembering why his knuckles were grazed in the first place, he added bitterly, "Why don't you go check on Anthony instead?"

Your face fell immediately and you dropped his hand. He hadn't meant to upset you, and he certainly hadn't meant to make you let go of his hand, but it seemed like his anger and jealousy had taken the reins today. But even when you were angry with him and looked about three seconds away from hitting his other hand, he couldn't help but marvel at you. He was completely enamored, looking from your furrowed brow to your narrowed eyes to your full lips. And his eyes stayed on your lips because it seemed that no matter how angry you were he couldn't ignore the ever-growing urge to kiss you right then and there, consequences be damned.

You rolled your eyes, anger bubbling up inside of you once again. "Benedict, I simply don't understand why you're so upset. If anything, marrying Anthony is a better option than marrying anyone else. Our families will remain close and you and I can still see each other fairly often. And once you're married–"

"I'll never marry," he interrupted, voice clipped. He was appalled that you would even suggest that, although he reasoned that you had no reason to believe that he wouldn't marry.

You look at him, confusion written all over your face. "I– What? What do you mean you will never marry? Benedict–"

"I love you," Ben blurted out. "I love you in a way that even words cannot express. I would rather remain unmarried than be with someone who isn't you," he added, needing to make sure that you understood that he loved you beyond what the boundaries of your friendship allowed. He had thought that you might fall in love with some other man, and he would be fated to watch you be besotted with someone else. However, now that he knew that you intended to marry Anthony, who you were most definitely not in love with, he needed you to know that he was the one who had loved you for years now. And he hoped that you might love him, too.

But you did not swoon like he expected. And you did not rush into his arms to kiss him or confess your undying love for him. You didn't even smile. "Are you joking?" you said angrily.

Benedict's eyes widened, shocked by your response. "I'm not– Why would I be joking?" he stumbled over his words.

"First you tell me you won't marry me, which is fine by the way, and then you leave so I can find a husband, which is also fine. Except," you let out a disbelieving laugh, "once you find out that your older brother is the man I'm going to marry, you are suddenly in love with me." You're still staring at him, daring him to challenge you. "It's a little too convenient, don't you think?"

He was panicking, horrified that you thought his confession was merely a way to get back at you for going after his brother. Guilt was coursing through his stomach in an entirely unpleasant manner, and he was struggling to find the words to convey his love for you in a way that you deserved to hear.

"It's not like that! I do love you. I want you and I don't want anyone else," he said desperately, reaching for your hand so he could reassure you.

But you were having none of it. After all this time, you couldn't believe he had the nerve to show up at Aubrey Hall, get into a fight with your future husband, and then confess his supposedly undying love for you. Feeling his hand clutching yours, a feeling so familiar, brought tears to your eyes. You ripped your hand away from his, not able to parse the gentleness with which he held your hand with his careless words.

"Stop it! Having you leave after I asked you to marry me was painful, but this might be the cruelest thing you've ever done, Benedict," you said, tears blurring your vision. "You can't just march in here after weeks of being away and demand that I stop my plans so that you can get back at your brother."

Benedict's eyes welled with tears, reflecting the pain that echoed in your own. He couldn't believe you still wanted to marry Anthony after all this. You were his one big love. There was no one else. And it was all too much to think that you didn't feel the same way.

So he pressed, "Is my love not enough? I have been falling apart on my own from the magnitude of my love for you. Should that not be enough? To know that I love you with every fiber of my being, more fiercely than I've ever done anything in my entire life?"

Tears were running unobstructed down your face now and you choked back a sob. If Benedict had told you this about six weeks ago, you would have dropped everything to be with him. But it was too late now.

"It's not enough when I had been feeling the exact same way and you still walked away from me," you responded, clutching his hand for comfort even though he was the one who had caused you pain.

He pulled you in fully, wrapping his arms around you and rubbing your back comfortingly. Benedict put his chin on your head as you buried your face in his shirt, breathing in his familiar scent that never failed to make you feel at home.

"I'm sorry, darling. I'm so sorry," he murmured, hugging you tighter when he heard you sob. "I suppose being in love with you feels so natural I didn't quite realize what it was until recently." He kept rubbing your back, tracing patterns on your skin.

"And– And I thought I was ruining our friendship. When I wanted you, I kept thinking I shouldn't have been," Ben added, cringing as he realized the gravity of his misunderstanding.

You were overwhelmed by his confession, barely believing that he actually reciprocated the feelings you had struggled to keep hidden for so long. You couldn't help the steady stream of tears running down your face, and you burrowed deeper into Benedict, needing to be closer still. You felt one of his hands lifting your face to look up at him and the other keeping you pressed firmly against him. Your tear-stained eyes met his as you sniffled, struggling to breathe normally.

You watched, almost in slow motion, as Benedict's eyes fluttered shut and leaned down, lips slightly parted as he leaned down toward you. This was everything you wanted, wasn't it? In the rose garden, you had wanted him to kiss you more than you had wanted to keep breathing. You had probably spent hours looking at his lips, wondering what it would be like to taste them. To have them on your lips and enjoy the feel of them as they moved against yours. To know what it felt like to have Benedict be truly yours.

But that was then, and you wanted different things now. So you broke free of his grasp and pushed him away, breathing heavily as he opened his eyes in shock and looked to you for an explanation.

"You can't just do that, Ben! We haven't resolved anything, and it certainly won't be resolved by you kissing me," you exclaimed, playing up your anger to hide your pain.

So you turned on your heel, exiting his studio as quietly as you had entered, and he was left, for the second time that day, speechless as someone walked away from him. 

—

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Tag List (lmk if you want to be added!):

@bellahadidnt16 @like-gabriel-and-castiel @riverraingrayworld @5sos-calm @elissanatok @titanicnerd-blog @noonenuts @moonwayne @lilasblogg @mmontgomeryb @fulltacoparadise @joyfullymulti @sopanngon @fanfiction-she-wrote @aureolinb @ambitionspassionscoffee @bbubbllejisoo @marvelspogue @avengersgirllorianna @loliakeoghan23 @cierrajhill

[pong03]

Leo kurosagi analysis

this was requested but tumblr wont let me post to their ask so: Okay, Leo is selfish. I'm not gonna deny all the bad things people say about him, or even deny he is a bad person, but he is a GREAT set up for a character. I would like to say that Tokyo debunker is giving set up for growth from each character, Leo is just the most Jarring, for the fan base. full disclosure, I did not like Leo or even consider liking him until I saw the HATE on here, I'm not just trying to be quirky by liking the most disliked character either. I tend to just want to see the good in what most people dislike. I like kpop and I tend to bias the most criticized or least biased members of a group, because I think it's an amazing feeling to give love... Although I understand it's cathartic to hate too, and that's probably why the Leo hate is so strong. I also still don't LIKE Leo, but I really do want to explore his character and I probably will make more posts as we see him more and as I experience him more myself. The Leo cu*king tho, is maybe my least favorite "trope" in TBD fanfic rn... but I don't k*nkshame y'all :*

I also would like to say Sho is his friend, not his victim or Rapunzel. There is some value to Leo in Sho's eyes and I think we shouldn't degrade that because we see that if Sho doesn't like someone he will not engage i.e Ren. Sho is a sweet character and I think he might be friends with Leo because he wants to see the best in him or knows his more repulsive behaviors are a defense mechanism or explained by other reasons we the MC are yet to see. Why I think that is even tho the weird blob guys in the mystery diner suck at making food he still wants to see the best in them, and that very scenario could be a cheeky analogy from the writers themselves, about Sho and Leo. Obviously Leo could be blackmailing Sho, I know that is a commonly held belief, but I do have some perspectives that could debunk that thought. Leo doesn't Garner blackmail on his peers. I think Leo is nosy, and invasive, but he is also incredibly capable, implied by his contributions to the vagastrom group case. If he wanted to figure out who Alan killed he could with his hacking prowess, but instead he asks Mido himself. In invasive ways yes, but he could just have found the information himself, whether by hacking or asking the countless witnesses of the clash. Rather he asks Mido face to face, and, correct me if I'm wrong we can't say he wouldn't have taken no for an answer because Mido just gets mad at his antics and never gives him a straight up no. Again I could be wrong so let me know if Alan does give him a straight no. It's been a while since chapter two for me.

Right now I want to explore some possibilities for his character given the information we have about him ATM. I mentioned above the fact his little nasty, mean, degrading comments could be a defense moreso that he wants people to try and push past that to see if they're viable as his friends. Especially because he is micro-influencer he might be protective of himself because of that. As well as being a chronic liar online he may want to know if he can trust you not to expose him online. I think exploring his past would be amazing because even his stigma makes him seem like an overly cautious person, as well as invasive. Cautious? I feel like its cut and dry that wanting to hear what people say when you aren't around could hint to him being quite anxious about what people think about him. like idk I also feel like the jealousy we see towards Sho might also be more about people finding Sho more approachable. I think because Leo wants to be more involved with people in power he might have not been trying to scare Subaru away because "Sho is mine >:(" and actually could have been jealous that Subaru noticed Sho first and not him. Still awful right? but also like I said I don't see Leo as enjoyable but more so a lot of room for redemption, or explanation. Sympathy or empathy might be something we feel for him a lot if he is properly explored.

Obvs these are just possibilities right :) I actually find him very cute and I like his catty behavior, especially because in comparison to other nasty ghouls he is like a kitten hissing at you, harmless. Like dude Taiga shot me, and you're just a nasty baby, I smell your fear on the inside, you just want to be loved like everyone else. He's a true tsundere and not that "I swear I don't like you!!" shit and I appreciate that. I hope nobody misconstrues this as defense of his toxicity more-so that the point of tokyo debunkers focus seems to be everyone is demonizing these teens who seriously are just teens, and sometimes teenagers are catty are toxic, but they're still learning. Especially when the adults suck too... if not more because they are adults. AND LEO IS HATED FOR BEING STINKY AND MEAN BUT TAIGA AND ROMEO ARE LIKED BUT SO MUCH MORE MORALLY DECREPIT... so idk that especially irks me. I still would like to know what people think and if you are also excited to see the exploration of the ghouls especially Leo, and what theories you may have on him yourself.

[popcornpoppin]

Christmas with you - s. h.

pairing: steve harrington x GN!reader (no pronouns used)

word count: 1.6k

warnings: mentions of difficult family relationships, slight swearing (the word "ass" is used once), no use of "y/n", otherwise it's all fluff <3 

a/n: people probably won't read this since it´s fluff but i had the idea and really wanted to write it so… we celebrate on the 24th here so that’s why i chose to post it today. hope everyone has a wonderful holiday whatever you celebrate or if you don’t celebrate anything at all. no matter what you can consider this my gift to you. to anyone who finds the holidays difficult i hope 2024 is kind to you and know you can always message me if you want someone to vent to. i might not be able to give any advice but i´ll always lend an ear <3 as always idk how i feel about this but i´m trying to get back into writing, so i´m trying not to overthink it.

Christmas was always difficult. After the mandatory Christmas dinner you always spent the rest of the night holed up in your room to avoid all the yelling and arguing. You didn't even bother to come down to open the presents anymore. It was only nine in the evening but you'd rather spend the rest of the night doing nothing before falling asleep than spend a second longer around your family. 

It was a beautiful night outside. The pavement and all the trees were covered in beautiful white dust. All the houses on your street were adorned with beautiful lights and decorations. The street lights were cascading beautiful shadows and making the snow sparkle. It all seemed like an idyllic Christmas, except it wasn´t.

Even if it was early you decided to try to sleep and wash away the loud voices that were carried from downstairs. You were just about to turn off all the lights in your bedroom when you heard the hard thud of a pebble hitting your bedroom window. 

Knitting your eyebrows together and slightly tilting your head in wonder, you walked over to the window. It was too dark outside to see anything. Due to the contrast of the darkness outside and the brightness in your room, all you could see with the window closed was your own reflection. Opening the lock and lifting up the window you were met with a cold breeze. Leaning the top of your body out of the window you looked down to find out who had thrown the small stone.

“Steve?”

You were met with a smile you knew all too well and a beautiful head of fluffy, brown hair.

“Grab your jacket, I want to show you something” Steve shouted, just loud enough for you to hear without your parents hearing him from inside the living room. There was a mischievous glint in his eyes, an offer you couldn´t refuse.

“What do you have planned this time, Harrington?” You laughed as he tilted his head in amusement; his boyish grin making his rugged, good looking features shine even more.

“It´s a surprise. Now hurry up, I´m freezing my ass off down here” but his smile only grew bigger as he complained. 

“Fine” you dragged out the ´e´, laughing as you continued “You're so impatient” 

Quickly, but silently, closing your window you headed over to your closet and grabbed your spare jacket and shoes. Both of which you kept in your room just in case you had to sneak out.

Lifting the window again you quietly and carefully climbed out and onto the drain tube. You softly started closing your window again, slowly closing it this time so your parents wouldn't hear. Making sure your window was just open enough so you could slip your fingers under it and open it again later, without too much cold air coming in and making your room freeze. Satisfied, you let yourself slip down the tube until your feet hit the ground with a soft thud.

Wrapping your arms and jacket closer around you, you walked over to Steve with small, hurried steps.

“Close your eyes” He grinned when you stopped right in front of him.

“Why?” You wondered aloud. You trusted Steve more than anyone else but this behavior, all the mystery, was a bit unusual for him.

“Like I told you, it's a surprise. Just trust me?” There was a soft, nervous expression grazing his features now so you decided to do as he said.

“Ok” You closed your eyes and let Steve put his gloved hands over them. He quietly told you when you could start walking and led you away.

From what you could tell with your sight gone it wasn't a long walk. You assumed he had taken you to his house, after all it was only a couple of houses down from yours. 

All you could hear around you was the quiet night breeze blowing against the few leaves that were still left on the otherwise bare trees and the soft crinkle of yours and Steve´s feet against the snow.

“Okay you can open them now” Steve removed his hands from your eyes and let them drop back to his sides.

Slowly opening your eyes you let them adjust to the light again as everything slowly got less blurry. 

“Wow” You let out a stunned breath.

“Do you like it?” Steve asked cautiously.

Tears started welling up in your eyes as you were met with the sight of the treehouse behind Steve´s house covered in Christmas lights, the one you had built together as kids. 

“It´s wonderful” You quietly muttered, almost unable to speak as you felt so moved by the gesture. Steve smiled softly.

“Come on let's head up” He ran ahead towards the small wooden ladder and started climbing.

You quickly followed after him, grabbing the planks with a firm grip so you wouldn´t slip. Steve held the hatch open for you so you could easily climb in. As you looked around inside you were taken aback by the sheer amount of work he had put into decorating the treehouse. Just like outside there were lights adorning the walls. In the middle of the room he had put a blanket on the floor with soft pillows for the two of you to sit on, a fluffy blanket in case you got cold and a picnic basket. In the corner sat a small, plastic Christmas tree which he had decorated with various ornaments the two of you had made when you were younger, including baubles you had painted one christmas after accidentally breaking the ones his mom had hung on their Christmas tree. The memory of it tore on your heart, remembering a time when his parents actually came home and celebrated Christmas with him. He had later told you that he preferred spending it alone, because at least then there was no fighting. 

Shaking the memory you pushed your body into the treehouse and walked towards the picnic blanket. Taking off your jacket you watched Steve do the same, revealing that he was wearing the Christmas sweater you had knitted for him. Smiling softly you sat down on the pillow next to Steve. Once you were settled he started gesturing towards the basket. 

“I made us some food” 

He started by pulling out plates, cutlery and napkins and setting them down between the two of you. After everything was placed in an orderly manner he started pulling out various boxes of Christmas food that he had prepared for the two of you. Finally he pulled out two glasses and a bottle of sparkling cider. Popping the bottle he first poured one glass, which he handed to you and then another one for himself. 

After you were done eating, you started putting everything back in the basket. As you placed the items back you felt a cool breeze prick your skin. A small, barely noticeable shiver rushed through your body. Steve noticing the movement grabbed the blanket and held it out for you.

“Here, I don't want you to grow cold and get sick” He muttered, pushing the blanket into your hands. You knew for a fact that if you were feeling the cold creeping on then Steve was definitely cold too. 

“I don't want you to freeze either” You answered with a frown. Moving the basket, you scooted closer to him until your side was pressed against his and wrapped the blanket around both of you. 

Neither of you said anything, sitting there in complete silence. The warmth of his body against yours made heat flush your cheeks. Turning away to hide the tint of pink from Steve, you didn't notice that he was blushing as well. 

The silence was finally broken by the sound of shuffling. Steve carefully and slowly moved his arm until it was resting around your shoulder. Even though he had a reputation in school for being a ladies´ man, it was all different with you. Whenever he was around you he felt like the little eight year old schoolboy who had grown a crush on his best friend. 

His body was stiff and you could tell he was holding his breath, awaiting your reaction. He let out a deep breath, his body visibly relaxing when you put your head on his shoulder. Closing your eyes you took a moment to breathe in his cologne, it was natural and comforting. You let yourself enjoy it, carefully memorizing it all - so that you could always remember how the two of you, for the first time ever, had a happy Christmas memory. 

“Uh oh”

You were snapped out of your thoughts by Steve´s voice. Tilting your head up towards his face you furrowed your brows “What?”

Steve only pointed upwards in response. You followed his gaze up to over your heads where he was holding a mistletoe between the two of you. Your eyes shot back towards his face, he was grinning slyly now.

“Oh, you are such a dork!” You laughed, pushing at his chest.

Steve only grabbed your wrist in response holding your hand against him and using it to pull you closer to him. Your lips met in a soft kiss and you melted against him, his thumb lightly rubbing circles on your cheek. You let out a content hum. There were no words spoken about what this meant for your friendship. There was no need, you both knew each other well enough to tell this was something you both desired. A small part of you guessed that this was something you both had wanted to do since you first learned what a crush was.

[that-one-girls-blog-posts]

you're confused about your emotions ? me too babe, here's a quick reading

I chose random images from my pinterest to read into your energy so you can choose randomly aswell, whatever speaks to you♡ also Idk what's with the 2016 songs today but I kept hearing random ones throughout this reading maybe there's some resonance for you

Pile 1

The Moon🌜

first off I'm hearing that song "we don't talk anymore" by Charlie Puth. So maybe you're dealing with some kind of loss right now, maybe a breakup, a fight with a loved one, a new chapter meaning you have to leave someone behind a little... if this is the case, or similar, allow yourself to be "thrown off" a little, those kinds of situations take adjusting and remember that nothing has to be forever. where I come frome we say : "thunderstorms clear the air" meaning that after a fight there's great potential for healthy communications and solving problems once and for all, for a peaceful and harmonic environment♡ A reading about your emotional state and I pull the moon, how well fitting. The answer truly lays on the inside with this one. no one can tell you how you truly feel exept for yourself! (and maybe your therapist) I think for most of you there's a new season starting and you're realising that it can't be all returning characters. Take some time to heal your relationship with relationships and analyze what and who is truly of good value to your life. you got this!

Pile 2

four of swords🗡 and page of pentacles🪙

for you I'm hearing that song "cold water" with Justin Bieber. And you actually need to take a jump into cold water. There's something you've been manifesting and now that it's slowly getting closer you're resisting the change. Maybe by refusing to let go ? It's like little kids now around Christmas, you can actually watch this happen with slight alterations, all the time. Their parents take them to the toystore so they can see what they like, and they child ofcourse find something but their parents tell them okay now time to go home and wait and see if Santa will bring it. But the kid clings to the shelves and doesn't wanna leave behind the thing they so desperately wanted. Little does it now that their parents just need to get them out of sight so "Santa" can buy the gift and deliver it WHEN IT IS TIME. let go of obsessing, overthinking and trying to "go the right path" and just let the story unfold, take it step by step even if its a little scary and you'll find yourself where you're supposed to be, you're so close already♡

Pile 3

seven of swords🗡

It's too heavy darling you can't carry all of that. You might think you do and you think you're so strong and abundant and successful for "having" all of that but then you wouldn't be feeling like this, would you? A burden, too much responsibility, too many goals or to do's for a person who only has 24hours in a day. I know the card typically speaks about actual betrayal but in this case it feels a little paranoid, like you're desperately trying to do it all on your own because your scared of beeing betrayed or someone messing with your vision or even catching evil eye. For you I'm hearing "Lady Marmalade" yk from Moulin Rounge !? I'm not sure how that fits in here and I never watched the movie but oh well, maybe you know what to do with this information. There could be something about sisterhood and sharing a problem (could be workload or talking about problems...). You might have that lonely wolf mindset, but no matter how strong you are, out there, beeing alone can get you killed. I keep seeing pictures of spiritual communities and churches, you might wanna be looking for something like a mediation or yoga class, bible study group, a coven.... depending on your beliefsystem! you're right not everyone is your friend but also not everyone is your enemy!

ps. reading back this comes off a little weird and I feel like I need to say this. please don't join a cult lol. If you are in some kind of group and things feel off, please take care of yourself♡

hope that helped <3

[cadaveerie]

ignore this post if you're tired of reading anything abt transphobes complaining about trans ppl (and top surgery scars) in dragon age, but:

David Gaider, the creator of the Dragon Age setting and veteran writer at BioWare (no longer working there, he didn't write for DATV), has given some reasoning as to why top surgery scars can be justified in the world of Thedas. Here are his posts:

"You want this to be about the top scars? OK, let's go. 1) There's no evidence that shapeshifting can selectively, and permanently, alter body parts. Even if it could, shapeshifters can only alter themselves. Morrigan cannot turn other people into spiders." "2) Even if other magic could alter body parts permanently, and there's no evidence this is the case, not everyone has access to it. One cannot walk into a Circle of Magi and go "remove boobs plz"." "3) If your issue is "why not heal?", healing magic also does not do everything. Scars exist. Why does Cassandra have a scar on her chin? If anyone could go "heal scar plz", it'd be her. Recognize there's a difference between the way it works in gameplay and lore, with healing as many other things." "4) If your issue is "how surgery exist?", you're probably looking at our own medieval world. Thedas is, at best, quasi-medieval. There are SO MANY instances of things that, in our world, didn't exist until the Renaissance or even later. It's not our medieval world and never tried to be." "But it's not about the top scars, is it? You've been presented with new information and you just don't like it. You don't want it. Like anyone who balked at the qunari change in DA2. So you try to make it about inconsistency because you feel that's stronger than this just being about YOUR biases."

source: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5]

I know that if you're pro-trans (or just normal) you understand all of this, but still. This is literally coming from the person who created Dragon Age. He defends the existence of both top surgery and its scars with a watsonian reasoning. At least this in-world explanation might be valuable for some people. That such a significant person behind Dragon Age justifies to you directly why this decision can make sense in such a world. And even from a POV that's pro-trans, it's cool to hear the in-world reasoning from someone that knows the setting better than anyone.

Overall I'm glad he's openly defending it because even if it's logical it's also nice that he speaks about it when he doesn't have to, especially since he's not involved in this project anymore. Idk if all of them, but it's nice to see that the devs are overall so trans-friendly. And nicer to see that there are trans devs to start with involved in the game.

And this whole thing is bigger than it should be, but the reality that not only people are still transphobic, but most big games simply don't have top surgery scars at all. Some have trans options, but they're still incredibly binary and restrictive, like BG3 and Cyberpunk 2077 (I like both of those games a lot, but being able to give a very stereotypically masculine character a vulva and vice-versa, or even worse, having that situation but the character's voice be directly related to pronouns, is not good enough. It shows a lack of care and understanding of trans people. And in BG3's case at least you can independently change voice and also go by they/them, but even then. Overall, it's good that those games went in that direction and that you could in that way be trans at all, but it was still not good at all. It was like saying "you are allowed to be trans, but only in this very passing, gender-conforming way and binary way." I feel like in this case, DATV's approach is one of the best I can think of so far, so in that sense I'm grateful (and apparently you can also say in the game that you're trans, which if that's true, that's great.) And this doesn't mean that the CC couldn't be better and more inclusive in a lot of other ways, but this is decent at least for trans characters.

So anyway, it's nice to have top surgery scars in CC. I hope at some point trans people will stop being targeted in this way and that it can be just something that's in the overwhelming majority of games, and done respectfully, and that people just leave us alone. Also wishing the same for POC, women, and people with any condition they decide is woke like... having vitiligo I guess.

[cripplecharacters]

oh yeah another question abt intellectual disability: what do people with moderate id speak like? i assume they wouldnt be perfectly articulate but i know making them talk like cavemen would be bad too. i do want it to be clear that they have language difficulties, but im not sure how to do that realistically. so what kinds of grammar errors are actually common? would it make sense to have them mix up words with similar pronunciation, or have difficulty discerning the differences in implications between words with similar meanings (like "pretty" vs "attractive")? do people with id ever 'imagine context' the way people(well, me) do when half-asleep where the brain mishears a statement as something completely unrelated? would spatial and situational awareness be impaired? also this is kind of a different question but if you can give advice on what to do with game mechanics for an id character in an rpg, that would be nice! i already have the stats figured out for every character and theres no stat that i think would be strongly affected by id but in terms of depicted fighting style and other mechanics maybe thered be some stuff informed by it (i cant do anything too complex though, im using rpg maker vx ace). idk! im spitballing here. main thing i need to know is how to write dialogue for a character with id ^_^

Hi! We have a post somewhat about this that you might find useful, I'll try to go over the other questions below!

Keep in mind my ID is mild (and on the milder side of that) so my answer will be all second-hand knowledge from talking to people with moderate ID in my SPED years.

A lot of it will depend on what condition causes they have. People with Williams syndrome have very “normal” verbal skills majority of the time and you can't really tell in my experience. On the other hand if they're autistic you can potentially guess from the tone of the voice e.g. they speak in a very loud and monotone way. People with Down syndrome are very likely to have a speech disorder, someone with cerebral palsy might slur their words, etc.

A lot of people with ID might be less talkative than your average person (there's definitely exceptions). So your character could use shorter sentences, simple sentences (in the grammar sense), prefer to use other forms of communication for things that don't require speech (e.g., nodding instead of saying “Yes, I agree”, or doing a thumbs up, etc.), or have to be prompted to actually answer/take part in the conversation.

I personally don't recall ever hearing the “mixing words with similar pronunciation” in someone's actual speech, maybe unless they learned the language from reading rather than hearing it? If that's the case, then ID could affect their speech more than if they didn't have it, otherwise I'd assume that the character might have brain damage or is maybe hard of hearing and simply mixes them up because they can't recognize/hear the difference between them.

Mixing words based on specific meaning makes much more sense in my opinion (probably because I do that myself lol). Synonyms or words that might make sense in one context but not the other are the worst. Your example here is great! When someone has ID they might take away the wrong meaning out of a word and use it incorrectly because of that. E.g., their parents used to take them camping to a forest with lots of bugs, they don't like bugs, they can later call something “foresty” to mean “with lots of bugs” even if it doesn't have much to do with an actual forest. This might make more sense for a character with more severe ID (or if they're just young) but using “attractive” when you'd normally say “pretty” makes sense for someone with moderate ID in my opinion.

Something that can also affect speech of someone with ID is word repetition. Not really in the echolalia sense (though it can be that too) but just using stock phrases that get repetitive over time. I try to edit it out from my posts but you can still kinda see it. For some people it will be ending most sentences with the same word, for someone else it will be starting two paragraphs with the same three words without realizing even though they're right next to each other or overusing “maybe” and “if” to start sentences.

As for the “imagining context” while mishearing something, I'm not sure if I know what you mean by it so I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I don't do it lol

Situational awareness is definitely impacted for all people with ID but to different degrees. I don't know if it's part of the diagnostic criteria but it might as well be. When the person's ID is mild it might look like someone who's just kinda unaware of what goes around them, maybe don't recognize that they're doing something that could end up badly. The more severe the intellectual disability the more obvious it is, the person might elope (wander off) and not be able to find their way back, not be able to use cooking utensils safely because they don't recognize the risks in real time (not really in the “not realizing that the knife is sharp” way if they have moderate ID, more like “not realizing that you need to be careful when putting things on hot oil or you can get burned”), assuming that people are automatically safe to be around, things like that.

Spatial awareness doesn't affect everyone, but one of the biggest comorbidities of ID is dyspraxia, which does affect it a lot. There are people with mild ID with severe dyspraxia, and severely ID people with no dyspraxia. It varies.

Unfortunately I have never played any RPGS and I'm not really familiar with the mechanics. Here's an old ask about intellectually disabled characters engaged in combat, hopefully it's useful?

If you want some real-life resources for hearing how intellectually disabled people talk, I really recommend this playlist. It's a bunch of interviews with people with Down syndrome and you can see that they're all very different from each other despite having the same disability.

I hope this helps! mod Sasza