#imagine that 😐
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That’s why I hate being on kpop tiktok bc the amount of loser ass middle schoolers who make being an internet troll their whole personality make “think pieces” or “opinion” videos over fancams and just spew actual bullshit 😭😭
Chan shouldn’t have had to apologize but atp I’m used to everyone jumping on a skz hate train any second they can 💀
yea that’s one of the reasons i dipped off of that side of being a kpop stan. it’s rlly just people saying mean shit abt groups they don’t even stan and calling it an unpopular opinion.
like yea it’s ur opinion sure but u coulda kept it in the drafts bestie u aren’t the edgy but cool moot ur just unnecessarily hateful 🤧 mfs throw a “this member is ugly sorry not sorry!!1!1!” and think it’s the absolute pinnacle of comedy like girl grow up what are we in the fifth grade 💀
#ask.txt#i aint tryna sound preachy#cuz i have my opinions on groups i don’t like sure#but wow it’s so easy to just keep it to myself#and not consume their content#imagine that 😐
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i'm sorry but i cannot stop thinking about it for reallll imagine you're richer than god and never had to face consequences for anything and you have so much money you don't even know what to do with it so you toss a quarter million at the stupidest tourism option on earth. and you see that the paper you have to sign tells you you could die and you look at the flimsy metal tube you're going to be plummeting into the ocean in and it doesn't even phase you because bad things don't happen to people like you. imagine some hours into the journey you realise something is wrong. maybe not you but somehow the knowledge that there was a fuckup becomes known to the 5 of you trapped in there. and you know you can't get out from the inside and you know you have no food and no bathroom and not even the room to ever stand up again. when does the realisation that your wealth cannot protect you from your inevitable mortality set in. how does someone like that reconcile with both death and the fact that it's 100% their own doing? can someone like this even come to terms with that or will they be fighting to find someone to blame until the last second? when does it reach you that all 5 of you are going to die one by one and there's nothing you can do? does the fact that 5 of you have enough air until thursday but one of you could have enough air until at least next week ever cross anyone's mind.
#it's so so so good i'm sorry it's literally such an insanely cool concept im literally frothing at the mouth here#i need to know what's going on in there so bad. but i don't want them to survive so#imagine if they did survive 😐 most insufferable ted talks on earth#oceangate#titanic#the titanic
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my dear friend @marlenacantswim asked me to draw the TOS yaoi polycule and i want you to know this is what the whole show is like to me
#in many ways jim kirk as a character is like. what if laios touden was in starfleet#i would really like to see that actually i think laios would have a great time in star trek#just a very autistic very asexual dude stuck in the horniest television show known to man#walking up to random aliens like hello sir do you have a cloaca :)#imagine him finding out about the concept of pon farr#‘chilchuck!! this lady said its pon farr night at the vulcan nightclub!!!’#chilchuck: 😐🍺🚬#anyway#mcspirk#i need to watch more tos i keep thinking about the episode where they steal spocks brain#good episode. great tv#star trek fanart#star trek tos#star trek the original series#jim kirk#s’chn t’gai spock#bones mccoy#spirk#love the fact that the only other ship name for kirk/spock is kock. this amuses me#noah.jpg#star trek
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Phil wins a subjective Dan vs phil. Words cannot express how shocked we all are. Plot twist of the century.
#this should be read in the most monotone voice imaginable#this is the vibe: 😐#but a win for phil is a win for us all so yay#dan and phil#phan#dnp#dip and pip
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WHEREVER YOU WANNA GO, THAT’S FINE WITH ME — MEGUMI FUSHIGURO
cw mentioned/talks about death but not like… in a serious way 😭 this whole thing is very unserious and stupid it’s just a thought i couldn’t get out of my head, megumi being… megumi, f2l but what’s new, also inspired by some clip from a tv show i’ve seen on tt but idk the name of it, if you do pls let me know
you ask megumi you make one of those marriage pacts with you—that if neither of you are married by thirty-five, you two will get married to each other—and he just hums for a moment before asking, “do you think i’ll be better suited for marriage at thirty-five?”
“what? n—i don’t know? maybe? it just seems like an appropriate age to get married if you’re not already, that’s all,” you explain.
more humming. he blinks, “i don’t think i’ll be all that different at thirty-five.”
“well, that’s concerning,” you joke, “you’re supposed to change—grow a little bit as a person and all that, megumi. even you are capable of it.”
“i won’t want anything different out of a marriage at thirty-five than i would right now,” he corrects you, then turns to you, and with all seriousness demands, “so, state your stipulations. what do you want from me, let’s figure out of this is gonna work now.”
you scoff, and cross your arms. “what do i want from you? that’s not how a marriage works.”
“that’s how this friendship already works.”
you say, megumi does; he pushes it than he should have, you say to stop, and eventually he does, and the cycle continues. he’s always stubborn, and sacrificing himself beyond necessity, and you’re always pulling his ear for it.
“okay. fine,” you settle, straightening your posture, “i want a house. three bedrooms, so nobara and yuuji don’t have to bicker about sharing when they stay over.”
megumi considers it, then counters with, “four. gojo needs a bedroom, too. one floor, i don’t like stairs.”
“where the fuck are we going to find a one-level four-bedroom house? i don’t want to live in the middle of butt-fuck nowhere.”
“we’ll find one,” he shrugs, doesn’t flinch when he promises: “or i’ll have one made for us. next: vacations.”
“twice per year. somewhere tropical, and somewhere metropolitan.”
“i don’t like the beach.”
“then you don’t have to go on the beach.”
“you’re responsible for me if i burn.”
“i’m responsible for you either way, i’m your wife,” you taunt, “pets, next. i want dogs. two. maybe three. and a bunny.”
“no bunnies, they’re too much work.”
“but i want a bunny, megumi.”
“you won’t have time for a bunny,” he rolls his eyes, “and you’re gonna get pissed when it chews up the expensive couch you’re gonna make me buy, and takes a shit in the expensive fruit bowl you’re gonna con gojo out of. no bunnies.”
you pout and frown, but megumi doesn’t budge: “no bunnies.”
you sigh, “no bunnies, but i want the dogs.”
“i didn’t say no to the dogs. unless you want a golden, then i’m not raising that.”
“why not? we already have yuuji.”
“exactly, we already have yuuji.”
“fine. i want a king sized bed. the really big, oversized ones you get in america.”
“done. children?”
“you want children?”
megumi shrugs, but you swear there’s a dust of pink on his cheeks, “maybe. maybe not. if i did, no more than two.”
and suddenly you can’t help but feel heat in your own face, hot with the image of two tiny megumis running around.
“that’s fine with me. maybe kids, but no more than two,” you cough, “i want one of those heated driveways for the house.”
“i’ll have it built. i’ll clean and do laundry and take out the trash if you cook.”
“what about days i don’t cook?”
“then i’ll do that, too,” megumi nods, “anything else?”
“yes. if i die first, you can remarry, but you visit my grave at least twice a year, and bring peonies. and that picture of me from prom where i look really good.”
“no.”
you stop. you blink. “what do you mean ‘no?’ you wouldn’t visit my grave?—kinda cruel considering i birthed your up-to-two future children and raised your dogs.”
“i won’t remarry. and i don’t want you to if i die first,” he corrects you, again, “and there’s no dying first and leaving me behind, i’m going with you.”
he doesn’t leave room for debate in his declarations: won’t, don’t; not wouldn’t, shouldn’t, couldn’t—you have to pinch yourself to stop chasing the rabbit of temptation running through your mind.
“i don’t… think you get to decide that,” you chuckle.
“of course i do,” megumi grins, uncrosses his legs and leans over. he reaches a hand to the back of your head and pushes it forward until your foreheads meet gently; and as if the affection wasn’t shocking enough, he continues, “where you go, i go. that’s marriage, right?”
he widens his smile a bit, before letting you go, leaning back into his seat again with crossed arms like nothing happened, and you’re left staring, blinking, breathing shallowly like prey that narrowly escaped being caught.
you don’t speak, so megumi does, “i have one more thing.”
and slowly, you unthaw enough to let out a questioning hum. megumi tilts his head before telling you, “i want your last name.”
“what? you—you would change your name?” you stutter, “but fushiguro is so pretty! and it’s your mom’s name, so few people get their mother’s names.”
“yeah. this way, our up-to-two children get their mother’s names, too.”
“i—okay… yeah, i guess they do,” you gape, then pout, “wait, what if i wanted to be mrs. fushiguro?”
“tough luck,” he grins, “you get everything else.”
you get me, instead, is what’s left unsaid.
“okay, fine. sounds like a deal to me.”
“great. we can’t have a spring wedding because gojo and toji will sneeze obnoxiously loudly, and we can’t have a summer wedding because the anniversary will conflict with our tropical vacation, and nobara will kill us if it’s too close to her birthday,” he says, standing up from the couch to head to the kitchen, “so i’ll see you at the courthouse in september.”
you nod reflexively, sinking back into the couch with a satisfied smile. it’s a while before your brain processes his words, and when it finally does, you spring up in a fluster, “september? megumi, i said when when we’re thirty-five and if neither of us are already married! megumi? megumi fushiguro, come back here!”
#i......... need to inhale him. that's all.#you can ignore all of this i just NEEDED to get this out of my head he's SO. he's his daddy's son that's what he is#which daddy? it doesn't matter 😐 which is why he's extra terrible#this also lives in an au where megumi is like 'are u done dating other guys yet 🙄 dont u know that we're endgame'#and has never made a single romantic comment to u before in ur entire life OH i hate him#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk scenarios#jjk imagines#megumi fushiguro x reader#megumi x reader#megumi fluff
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Why did no one tell me about the Homeric Hymn to Hermes, in which infant Hermes, not even a day old, is possessed of a need to steal Apollo’s cattle (because you know a guy’s got to be a god of SOMETHING), so he, an infant child, manages to do exactly that (details not disclosed)—and then goes home and climbs back in his crib.
And then Apollo storms in the next day and accuses him of stealing the cattle. One day-old Hermes. Like. We have Apollo, Olympian, god of the sun, son of Zeus, standing over this baby’s crib screaming at him and threatening to send him to Tartarus if he doesn’t admit to stealing his cattle I CAN’T
And it goes down a little something like:
Apollo: “WHERE IS MY CATTLE. I WILL KILL YOU”
Hermes: “I’m a baby. What’s cattle”
#I’m just imagining Maia standing in her kitchen like 😐#greek gods#greek mythology#mythology#hermes#apollo
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the late, great, beheaded lady sycorax
#vtm#vampire the masquerade#wod#world of darkness#vtm art#clan malkavian#*24#art#mine#she was the malkavian sire of darcy my vtmb fledgling. rip queen#i've only drawn her once before years ago for vamptober. if grout wasnt the primogen i imagine she could've been a candidate#i'd say killing her was lacroix's biggest crime but his biggest crime was actually whatever the fuck was going on with his sheriff 😐#anyway what do u think abt the colors on this? i tried a new painting process
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Selfie
#you do not see the one mistake#honkai star rail fanart#honkai star rail#caelus#march 7th#dan heng#fanart#charls art#imagine i drew the selfie#dan hengs face: 😐
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ryan and shane give such sibling vibes sometimes and it is always so funny to me. like TELL ME this isn’t so “arguing with your sibling in the car cause they won’t stop poking you” vibes lmao. i truly love them. the besties!!!
#watcher#watcher entertainment#we are watcher#ryan bergara#shane madej#shane and ryan#ghost files#ghost files tour#besties fr#lizzie being like#”you are literally crushing him 😐” makes me giggle#can’t imagine being her and having to deal with them both lmao#pray for lizzie <3
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Logan Paul beefing with young adults online instead of taking care of his own kid speaks volumes...
#everytime i think ive escaped the mcyt drama#MORE DRAMA FUCKING HAPPENS!!#also ksi having one sided beef with the goat dantdm 💀#welcome back dreamwastaken fr 💀#oh and fuck mr beast because he sucks ass#anti mr beast#anti ksi#anti logan paul#tommyinnit#dantdm#mcyt#edit: imagine getting upset over how i worded this good lord 😐
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𝐀 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐄𝐑'𝐒 𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐁𝐔𝐂𝐊𝐒 18. the do-over date to end all first dates
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SUMMARY ▸ in which you work at the starbucks where heeseung is a regular at (and considered a public enemy). also he only goes when he’s stoned off his ass.
#addy called me out for lying ab not double updating 😂😂😐#enhypen#enhypen smau#heeseung fluff#heeseung smau#enhypen imagines#heeseung imagines#lee heeseung#enhypen social media au#heeseung x reader#enhypen reactions#heeseung reactions#enhypen scenarios#heeseung scenarios#enhypen drabbles#heeseung drabbles
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Barbarian!Bakugo is a little bit… obsessed with lactation.
No, it’s not a new concept to him—he’s seen mothers feeding their children before, in fact, hardly ever put a thought to it.
But now that it’s you, now that it’s his child… it’s interesting to him. Beyond interesting, really. That someone he loves and desires so carnally can provide an almost irreplaceable service, one he is incapable of replicating despite how much he wants to provide for the both of you.
And he’d want to be present for most feedings anyway, both to bond and help ease the parenting load off your shoulders… but the whole time, he can’t take his eyes off your chest, where the little one is latched so safely and happy, suckling away as he stares in a protective haze, in awe. Blinking when baby blinks, wincing when you wince, his hands balling into fists when you sigh and the soft fat of your bosom jiggles.
He’s shy, though. Shy to admit his fascination despite how he asks to touch you one night, after the babe has been fed, swaddled and put to rest, and then rubs his fingers so gently against your nipple it starts to leak.
Bakugo looks at you under thick lashes, no blush because he’s seen you naked endless times, was there for the birth, but hesitant, almost… to do more than feel your raw areola underneath the rough pads of his fingertips. Even if, no sooner, does he put a thumb into his mouth to taste the few, silken drops of milk that escaped onto his skin.
Baby always eats first, of course, until plump and sleepy… but after that first touch, barbarian!Bakugo is no longer above licking up what’s left for him until your tits are relaxed and soft, then massaging you til there’s milk in abundance once more.
#bakugo#bakugou x reader#I wrote something similar to this before but I didn’t actually write the#toddy s*cking#but I also can’t really remember what I said#and also this isn’t very descriptive#so 🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️🤷🏼♀️#anyway it just makes me laugh to think of this big honking beast of a man to be staring at u all dumbfounded/concentrated#when ur nursing his kid#I wish there were emojis to describe the face I’m imagining ��😲😠 combined#but he’s just so… intriqued#even if he knew that’s how it worked it’s like#that’s my wife……… my baby mama……#😳#esp cuz he’s always hunting he’s upset he can’t do more to help feed babba except keep u company#he’s so used to doing more#stick him with loin cloth duty LMDAOOOO KIDDING#anyway ugh have a brand new phone charger that keeps doing the unpluggy thing#might need to get that fixed#also my cat just took a fat sh*t and I can smell it#LOL I’m so tired#hope this was … tolerable!!!#caitie post#tw:lactation#fem reader#kids tw
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one time i was talking about a famous guy that i like/find attractive and i accidentally said “love [guy].. when he’s dressed” and that really is. the way i feel about dan and phil as well, i’m like the opposite of the showing ankle meme, i DONT want to see it
#the struggles of a lesbian in love with dan and phil#not to qoute phil with a different meaning behind it but imagine if that was on top of you 😐#reminded myself of it bc a coworker showed me a picture of a gug shes talking to :) and i didnt want to be mean :)#the dots im connecting is confusing me as well idk#what. is this. is this what anyone wants to read i dont think so but here you go ig#dan howell#phil lester#dan and phil#phan#nebulae.speaks
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Coffee addict Never sleeps Tim drake ❌
Solving cases in his sleep off 87 energy drinks Tim Drake ✅
The coffee addict never sleeps perpetually tired Tim Drake thing is a widely accepted headcanon however that was elementary school tim but after he stayed up for a week straight subsisting entirely on coffee to decipher the bat weekly patrol schedule and how it aligns with rogue attacks/Arkham breakouts, he crashed then when he woke up it was fucking wednesday so he missed his chance to commemorate his discovery with pictures of Robin and he decided that shit would never happen again and made himself an ‘efficient’ sleep schedule so he could run around doing fuck shit, add to his robin shrine, and stay on honor roll bc he was even more pissed to see the gotham gazette had pictures of Robin with an on site interview credited to Vicki Vale (listen bowl cut tim had a one sided beef with vicki vale that included tim judging who gets better pics of the bats but she isn’t even aware that she’s competing with a whole ass child 😭 he’s sitting at the table with a mug of orange juice and looks at the newspaper snorts and goes ‘fucking amateur I could do better’)
Regularly unsupervised tiny businessman in training Tim ‘Ten hours of uninterrupted sleep?? That’s so inefficient not to mention fucking stupid’ Drake is so pissed he missed getting shots of Robin dropkicking a rogue from 6 six stories up (for absolutely no reason dick just thinks it’s fun) that he just takes at least 3 hour naps every eight hours 😭 he refuses to spend almost half a day sleeping ‘for no reason when he could be doing something productive’
And he still does this as a bat but it’s just easier to tell if he didn’t take his nap bc he has less than zero impulse control and he’s just fucking done with everything like the gcpd is terrified bc tim’s saying shit like ‘This guys a fucking moron, I could’ve done this in half the time without killing anyone fucking loser doesn’t he know if you keep them alive you can prolong the torture?’ and ‘you’re like all hysterical and for what 🤨 ‘you blew up 83% of Bristol waah’ stfu and fucking rebuild it?? It’s only rich mfs that live there, it’s just a matter of them opening their fucking wallets’ once a new recruit made the mistake of asking if robin had adult supervision regularly and Tim responded with ‘well if you’re gonna snitch to cps like a little bitch then yeah’ and that cop did snitch so tim fucking doxxed him
Yj has just accepted that sometimes they will find tim in an air vent, on the roof, in one of their closets, or something just fucking knocked out then an alarm will go off and he’ll just get up like nothing happened but for the first couple of months they were probably concerned bc ‘I’ve never seen you sleep?? wtf are you on man’ and Tim’s confused bc ‘I slept next to you this morning wdym??’ and that’s how yj discovers tim sleeps with his eyes open
But one of the worst things about Tim’s ‘time efficient sleep schedule’ nonsense is that it fucking works he’s one of the most well rested and coherent bats even after back to back Arkham breakouts however the absolute worst thing about his sleep schedule is the likelihood of going into the cave and seeing tim staring in a daze but wide eyed yet somehow never blinking at the batcomputer with 57 tabs open on top of being unresponsive and thinking he has a fucking concussion or he’s been replaced but he’s just doing case work while muttering nonsense in his fucking sleep for some reason
#Tim drake being unhinged even in his sleep and taking sleepwalking to the next level by doing reports/solving cases in his sleep#A bat hearing incoherent mumbling but no one’s nearby: 😐 he’s in the walls 😨 he’s in the goddamn walls#No one knows how or why he’s in that particular spot in the wall bc there’s isn’t a secret entrance/crawl space there#Tim also has a wall of energy drinks Bruce regularly tries to lecture him aboot#And Tim’s like ‘your eldest son has snorted sugar MULTIPLE times’#then he gestures at Jason ‘and that one looks like if he didn’t have drug related childhood trauma he’d try to snort protein powder’#bruce: tim we have to talk about your behavior#Tim: like three of your kids have basked in the blood of their enemies 🤨 I am NOT your biggest issue rn#Dick Grayson being the main reason there’s an ‘acceptable levels of force’ slide with 600+ slides & most are examples of what not to do#Stephanie 🤝🏾 Damian: being reason Bruce is adding more slides to a PowerPoint from 2 decades ago#Tim drakes idea of straight forward is how everyone else imagines jumping through hoops and fucking struggling to avoid pissing off the fae#Like wdym simple?? This plan has 97 parts and he’s like no that’s just the first page of plan 1 if it’s sunny#Rogues: I can’t catch him off guard wtf do none of these mfs sleep??#Tim ‘never let em know your next move’ Drake who’s been sleep for the past 45 minutes: 🔵➖🔵#Yj has cuddle piles in the air vents#Everyone with enhanced senses is losing bc ‘there are children in the walls’#Coffee addict babs calls tim weak when he tells her he cut coffee bc it was fucking with him before continuing to chug hot coffee#Oracle: this is the worst Tuesday ever 😔 I need more coffee before I deal with an Arkham breakout#Nightwing: but it’s sunday??#Spoiler: Maybe it’s time we switch to decaf love also just out of curiosity when was the last time you slept??#Oracle: you want the fucking location or not?#Dick: I take it back mb#Spoiler: a thousand apologies to our gracious overlord#Oracle: that’s what I thought#Bruce: you’re benched oracle#Oracle: take that bench and shove it up your ass batman#Steph 100% calls everyone mushy pet names and has since Bruce lectured her about professionalism when she was dating tim#Imagine getting your ass kicked by a sleepingwalking middle schooler#Or worse: imagine having to explain to your insurance company that a sleepwalking child blew up your home#tim drake is a menace
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Anthony Bridgerton is truly the most besotted husband of all time because look at the way his face drops and his smile just vanishes the moment he’s not looking at his wife
He really starts bubbling with hatred the second Kate’s not in front of his eyes
#bridgerton season 3#anthony bridgerton#kate sharma#kate sharma x anthony bridgerton#kanthony#bridgerton#bridgerton analysis#LOOK AT HIM#I can’t he really went from 🥰🤩🥹😚#to#🤨🙄😐😠#simply because he’s not looking at Kate#and you know what#he’s so real#because imagine you have Kate as your wife#but society tells you that you cannot stare at her 24/7#yeah I’d become a hater too idc idc
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twin aus are fun bc sukuna is sooooo ugly and yuuji is soooooooo pretty and beautiful and lovely <3 completely understand why sukuna ends up the deliquent loser twin bc why would anybody choose him when <3yuuji<3 is right there
#this is a sukuna hate post 😐 the first of many to come.#ive been hating on geto (and will.) but you all should know i dont fuck with that ugly ass BITCH either!!!!!#itadori twin au is so fun in my head bc not only is sukuna the ugly loser degenerate twin he's also Younger than yuuji (by like. and hour..#it was probably hard to birth his big ass head) but like. yuuji is born at 11 something pm one night and sukuna is at 12 am the next day#so they NEVER celebrate their birthdays together as they SHOULDNT! cant blame yuuji for that !!!!#see also: sukuna hates and claims he can beat up all of yuuji's friends except nobara#bc when they were 4 he was mean to her and she took a hammer to his shoulder and he has never forgotten it#he's all talk 🙄 fraud watch#see also: choso doesnt usually interfere with the twins arguing except when sukuna does too much and now he has to be all Big Brother#it's also extremely hilarious to imagine youre dating yuuji and you two stop by his house#and hes like ah fuck he's here.. he's not supposed to be here 🙄 lets go! and ur like wait who is here what's going on#and too late. sukuna comes out of his room and hes on his way out and ur like what. who. yuuji what the fuck just happened#and hes like that was my brother..#and ur like. u... have a brother.... a twin brother? and NOBODY told me?????#and yuujis like yeah in an ideal world i would have never needed to bring him up 🙄
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