#im tired of trying to see things the way they do. how my ex is probably just this dumb scared kid inside who does dumb shit and doesnt
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bunnyboy-juice · 1 month ago
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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capricioussun · 7 months ago
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Will probably delete later but genuinely WHY do so many ppl hate uf papyrus. "He’s horrible and a bad brother and abusive >:(((" my guy. YOU made him that way
#always weirds me out when a really bad take becomes popular fanon and ppl treat it like it's an inherent universal take#happens to all characters I feel but it's esp frustrating when it's not just a bad take but just straight making a character a certain way#as a plot device. or to project ur own issues onto. at that point just. make an oc or smth. why mangle a character so severely. what is#the purpose#im not even going to TRY to pretend i have perfect ic flawless interps (I absolutely don't and know this)#but even w/ characters I have minimal interest in (like asgore for ex) it's important to me to at least *try* to keep them in line w/ their#og counterparts.#and you'd think. given how so many ppl infantilized Papyrus. that some of that would've bled thru into au counterparts#but nope. the fanon versions are practically just wholly different characters who just look similar and 'fill the same role' in their au#and it's honestly not like there's a shortage of other characters sans could have a toxic relationship with in uf#(bc let's be honest here that's 90% of the reason uf papyrus got characterized that way. for ppl to project onto and sympathize with sans)#I don't like having strong negative opinions on things and I especially don't like talking abt them publicly but idk if it's just weird#timing or smth I've seen so many bad takes the past couple weeks#to each their own and I'd never like. bash someone for having a diff take than me. I just don't...understand.#idk#I'm really tired and my eyes are sticky so I really shouldn't even be posting rn bc I will see this later and be like#can't BELIEVE that guy posted an opinion on the internet. WHY would he do that
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heyitslapis · 3 months ago
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Ok
#kinda vent post cause ive been anxious ever since we got coffee this evening#I promise I'm not trying to be weird or anything. I'm just#I just really don't want to screw this up. I know we spent almost the last year avoiding each other#And I know things between us were rocky for a bit before that#and I hope I'm not overwhelming you. I know things won't be better overnight#I know we've distanced so much and theres so much awkward history there. I know things are different now#And I respect that. I respect your relationship and your new life. I'm not trying to impose or make you uncomfortable#I'm just anxious and tbh scared an nervous too. I don't want to fuck this up. If theres a chance for us to be close friends again I want it#Im so so so scared of fucking it up. I feel like I forgot how to be friends & after the way I left things Im scared that I lost my chance#I'm scared that it's not gonna work and that a permanent goodbye is in our future. I'm scared that you won't want me around after all#I would understand if that became the case.. but I really don't want that#I cant text you this without seeming like an overbearing clingy anxious mess of an ex but ive been on the verge of a panic attack all night#just for the fear that I'm fucking up already somehow. Just the fear that this isn't going to work and I shouldn't even try#I think I spent so long avoiding you that now I don't know what to do with myself. But I'm trying to be normal#I promise I dont have any motives other than missing a really great friendship and being tired of missing friends#And maybe I still have a ways to go in the emotional healing department but I think I'm ok enough to try. I've been ok for a while now#If you see this please know that I mean every word. If you never see it thats ok because I just need to get it off my chest before I burst#I don't want to scare you off or lose you again. if thats what it comes to then know I'll always miss and appreciate you for all my days#Thats all. Ive been a ball of nerves all evening & I just needed to air this out cause having this weight sitting on my chest is too much#emma rambles#personal#vent post
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snekdood · 2 years ago
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Im so tired of acting the way i think some ppl on here think i should act. Im tired of assuming theyre seeing me through the lens my ex provides for them. Im tired of feeling like nothing i say or do matters anyways because people have made up their mind about me and refuse to try to see me in another light. I know who I am and I know what im like and im tired of trying to almost essentially help people see me change my behavior for the better from something i never even was? Because i guess i feel like if i act like most people dont know about the issues between me and my ex that means other people will think im just *pretending nothing is wrong or happening*. It feels like i cant win either way. I cant play pretend as this horrible person whos trying to reform and have people allow me the chance to actually change and recognize that change and i cant also be myself and just know myself without people thinking im just ignoring this thing that isnt even a thing i need to work on or ever even fucking did. Im so tired of feeling convinced that other people are convinced im horrible and having to work from there and having to try to navigate that situation and get someone to see my side of things because ive just come to the conclusion that some people just will refuse to and idk. Theres nothing i can do in this situation. I just know i didnt deserve any of it.
#im like one of the most careful fucking people in the world istg#even before all of this but now especially after this bc im operating under the assumption that ppl see me as if im not#i almost feel brainwashed by what i think others perception of me is like online.#and then i try to go through the steps i think someone who did fo those things would do. or as if i did do those things and what id do#in that situation afterward. but i didnt do those things. and i dont need to live and operate as if i did to prove to other ppl i have the#emotional and mental maturity that i do#i dont need to sit here and let people gaslight me into their perception of me or at least what i think it is#i am such a good stinky lil guy. its people like my ex and the people around them online that brought out all this bitterness in me.#i resent those people so much. and i cant help but feel like theyre all stalking me still all the time. they want me to live like that too#like im in a panopticon. but this is what im saying- if i move on like i know myself and operate as myself the way ik myself#THOSE PEOPLE will come around and then act like im ignoring the situation with my ex and 'trying to escape responsibility'#i dont know why i feel so obedient to their perception. i mean i guess i know why like probably bc of my brother pushing me into a box#and me feeling like i have to stay in there or be abused. i feel the same way with my ex- if i dont act like ive been in the box they put#me in this whole time then they are going to get mad at me and try to come after me more i feel like.#i feel like thats when theyre really going to try to sic their followers or friends after me.#idk but im going to stop. i dont care how you see me. its not real. its not true. it never was. i was abused by this person and thats the#final truth about it. im not saying i couldnt have been reactively abusive sometimes with them but all the things they say i did#that they did to me but say i did but x10 worse? no. fuck off. thats not fucking me. you DONT KNOW ME. YOU HAVENT BEEN AROUND ME#ALL MY LIFE GROWING UP. IF YOU KNEW ME YOU WOULD KNOW ID NEVER DO THAT SHIT. YOU WOULD FUCKING KNOW THAT.#which is why i know you dont know me. none of you do. im tired of operating the way i think you want me to.#im tired of trying to empathize with people i dont want to LIKE my ex or my brother or my sister or my dad#im tired of trying to see things the way they do. how my ex is probably just this dumb scared kid inside who does dumb shit and doesnt#think about the consequences and doesnt care about the consequences of their actions because their only priority is#self preservation. like i dont care. i understand but i dont care. they still hurt me. they still did what they did to me.#they still know they did something wrong otherwise they wouldnt have started this whole smear campaign.#im tired of trying to sympathize with them. give them a million chances to change. do what i can to encourage them to actually have empathy#even towards the people they hurt and like to smear.#because they dont do the same for me. i know. i know theyre still shit talking me. i know they cant stop because if they did theyd have to#have more empathy about me on a whole lot of things they dont want to think about bc they dont want to feel about how they treated me#and continue to treat me by keeping up this narrative abt me online. they dont give a fuck so why am i extending so much to them.
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sunlightfeeling · 8 months ago
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god i forgot how much i liked that cohost hid a lot of metrics…
(much ranting in the tags…)
#im despising the note counter again….#ramblin but not a gamblin man#but i really REALLY didnt like how cohost completely felt like a void#…​like genuinely felt like an isolation room or smth…#why can’t i just opt out#i have my notifications turned off again for sanity#but I don’t like seeing everyone else’s lol#…​they make me feel bad….#and yeah i guess it has to do with smaller fandom but that’s kind of part of why it sucks#i want new content that’s not just made by the small group that we are#i want fuckin dedicated tags and a line of people making new things….even if the stuff we use is old#there are so many smasmas that have NEVER been giffed#so many dramas#(even though for a lot of these there’s like negative incentive to make anything for….)#but you know what sucks the most….#no matter how much we love the stuff and do it because we like it….we are hoping that it will get shared….be known….#im trying so hard not to pressure myself to gif every little thing#which is part of why im posting more and more clips#but it hurts seeing the note count that other fandoms get even in such a short time….and just being grateful-enjoying the ones i receive#i don’t know how much this shit makes sense#and im honestly so tired of getting upset by this time and time again but it hurts#i hate being part of an actually small fandom lol#..​that’s basically it….i guess#or one that’s small until someone random reblogs it and shoots the note count up#and I really can’t explain why that makes me more upset than happy but it actually really does lol#how many times am i going to talk about these and go in circles? way too many#i ruminate….its what i do…always been that way…got on my ex’s fuckin nerves lmfao……
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fox-guardian · 1 year ago
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hey guys did you know that um. did you know. first of all did you know i'm losing my mind, secondly, do y'all remember in tma how when someone reads a written statement, they don't really Stop unless they're interrupted? and they read the whole thing easy cheesy, no issues with reading whatever words are there? like. jon literally could read french for a whole statement and was Fine. granted, that's Jon, but like nobody else struggled with pronunciations and whatnot (that i can recall)
presumably, this is an eye thing. either as employees of the institute, or because everyone there is just also eye-aligned in some degree (melanie had the ghost hunting show, the eye is fond of martin, etc)
and then there's tim in season 3 ep 86
[Sigh] Statement of… uh, Benjamin Hatendi… Hateendi? Regarding a… [papers rustling] a blanket. Dead friend. Monster. Regarding his unavoidable and gruesome end. How he tried to hide. He couldn’t. Statement is from… 1983, March 2nd. And I guess… [long sigh] I guess I’m doing this one. Tim Stoker. Archival assistant… Archival prisoner at the Magnus Institute.
correct me if im wrong but i don't recall anyone struggling with pronunciations before this bit. but that's not even the biggest thing here, that's just a lil Taste, a lil Flavor.
note the phrasing there. "Regarding his unavoidable and gruesome end." why would he say this when the written text on the statement says this:
Uh, right. Benjamin Hatendi’s account of… [rustling pages] oh for… a, a strange encounter. Er, statement date, March 2nd, 1983. Melanie King recording. Apparently.
"a strange encounter". that's it. nothing about an unavoidable death, just a "strange encounter". Tim Why Did You Say That.
why would our dear timothy bimothy, who is being pushed to the brink, who is becoming rapidly more depressed and losing hope, say this?
this isn't the only time he's said some weirdly grim shit tho (ep 104)
There was never really any hope for me, though, was there? This was how it was always going to go.
and then there's this bit from elias apparently having Looked into tim (also 104)
TIM All right, hit me with your X-ray eyes then, boss. What do you see? ELIAS Disruption. An unpredictable, angry man with nothing left but the desire to feel in some way revenged. TIM [Sarcastic] Ooh, terrifying! Surely only magic could have let you see so deep inside my very soul.
"nothing left" but the desire to feel revenged. and tim doesn't dispute this, because it's true.
when he first joined the institute he did so in order to look for answers about danny, but then he stopped seriously looking. and now that the circus is back, this is all the drive he has left. not looking for answers, just wanting revenge. closure. an end, if you will.
this is Literally It For Him. a couple lines later he suggests elias kill him, he's At The Breaking Point.
he is so tired, he's lost all hope, and he's saying all this grim shit about "unavoidable death" and "this is how it was always going to go" like hmmmm sounds familiar doesn't it. DOESN'T IT (<- is going insane)
(ep 11) [....] despite the rapid response of the paramedics and how much of his medical history I had immediately to hand, there was nothing I could do to save him. (ep 11) I have no responsibility to try and prevent whatever fate is coming for you. Based on my previous experience, such a thing is likely impossible anyway,[....] (ep 121) There. That was it. That was our fate; where we would always be.
hmmmm sounds a bit like oliver huh? everyone's favorite ex-accountant avatar of the end?? right??
but then there's this last bit i have from ep 86.
why did he stop reading the statement
Statement. “My parents never let me have a nightlight. I was always afraid, but they were ju–” Ugh, this is stupid.
why did he do that. again, correct me if im wrong but when else has someone just Stopped Reading like that without someone or something else interrupting them? why could tim just stop himself?
my theory is this: at this point, tim is completely gone from being aligned with the eye. he no longer seeks to know what happened to danny, he just wants closure. he doesn't wanna do any statement work, and he keeps mentioning these tidbits about hopelessness and the inevitability of terrible events, specifically death.
the eye isn't compelling him to read the statements like it does the others, because it doesn't have as strong a hold anymore. the grip is slipping from him. and by the time the unknowing rolls around, maybe it's lost him for good. maybe he finally fell into a different power he never meant to serve, and yet, he does.
and maybe. just maybe. because i'm so not in denial. but MAYBE. he did die in the unknowing. but maybe he got better.
basically end!tim truthers rise up, this is how end!tim kayaking with his bf oliver banks can still win, etc etc I'm Going Feral <3
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serejae · 6 months ago
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IF BY CHANCE ? | BND
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p2
WHAT ? - BND AS EXES WHO WANT YOU BACK (bnd realizing they messed up after you end things)
WHEN ? - (warning) this is not a REAL display of the members im just doing this for weeping entertainment:) attempt to unconsented kissing in jaehyuns, drinking in sungho’s, mentions of throw up/throwing up in leehans, major angst 😒
WHO ? - (a/n) i love angst but not like death but yearning and groveling, pls tell me yall relate. lowk went hard on jaehyun and leehans from personal experience 🤔🤔
uncapitalization intended and not proofread
theres a theory that you will always meet the same person twice
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P.SUNGHO ; he was too focused on his career.
! - you knew and understood thst sungho’s job was very important to him but it started to feel like you werent his partner anymore. you started to feel like decoration in your guys apartment that he would just ignore when he got home.
! - to try and help your relationship you made him dinner, cleaned up the place, asked him about his day to which he blew up. his cold demeanor suddenly dropped as he yelled at you about constantly bothering him when he just wanted to sleep. you knew your intentions and knew you didnt want to bother but help sungho. you then realize you werent valued in this relationship and were pulling the whole weight by yourself, so you ended things.
! - it took him about 4 days to realize that he messed up. those 4 days his mind was constantly fogged up about work, after those 4 days he walked into the house and how he realized was when he alerted you (or tried to) that he was home with a “honey im home”, only to be met with silence. a bit confused not realizing his brain hadnt catched up yet, he walked into your twos room, or use to be. only to be met with the mess he left for himself in the morning. there is when he realized you weren’t there anymore. to shake his mind off of it, he decided to eat before doing anything ,he went to the kitchen to heat up some frozen dinner. as the meal heated he realized the house was so empty, cold, and quiet. the only sound was coming from the spinning microwave.
! - it’s safe to say the soulless house took a toll on him. everyday he dreaded going home, which is funny cause he couldve said the same thing before he realized how important you were. his friends who were tired of seeing him so lifeless decided to invite him to go to the bar to hang out…he wasnt much fun there either. that was until he caught a glimpse of you from the reflection of his empty shot glass. his eyes light up and he turns around to make eye contact with you. .
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L.RIWOO ; trust issues.
! - you understood where riwoo was coming from, you knew that trust issues are normal , but it got to a point where his trust issues started to make you question him.
! - and it didnt help that each time you did try to reassure him that it somehow made it worse. “ri, of course im going to stay late, my boss asked me too. you have my location, i send you photos of me working, what else do you want?” maybe your approach wasnt the best but the way he snapped was when you knew no matter how much you tried to protect both you and his peace, he will try to tear it down again. “oh, so now your getting defensive. i shouldve known, especially from you.” he said it with no remorse or thought behind it. and to him he thought he was winning this argument but in reality he was going to make the biggest loss of his life.
! - it took him 5 hours to realize he messed up. when you left and packed your things he thought you’d run back and it’ll make him feel better about himself. but after 4 hours it was already 3 am and he realized maybe…you wouldnt come back as soon as he thought. but that last hour before he realized he messed up, he had a dream of you and him. you two were living that exact moment, before you left. you standing pacing back and forth as he sat on the couch. except this time, he talks to you about why he thinks the way he thinks and vows to do better. in that dream he sleeps with you in his arms. when he woke up he stared at the ceiling, and it was like it was talking to him. thats when he realized you werent coming back. you wont be in his arms again, you wont tell him about your day, and you wont constantly tired of arguing with him because of his doubts.
! - after trapping himself in his house and thoughts he decided to go on a walk, but to his suprise once he opens the door you stand there staring at him with a box of his things in your hands. his mouth goes dry
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M. JAEHYUN ; girl bestfriend
! - you were the never the type of partner to care too much about the opposite gender best friends as you were very secure in your relationship, but in this case it wasnt him but rather her. you knew from the moment she laid her eyes on you she was no good. but you decided to give her the benefit of the doubt as this was jaehyuns childhood bestfriend, and if you didnt like her you could at least pretend for your boyfriends sake.
! - you were always calm and reserved around jaehyun and his bestfriend even on those dsys you wanted to push her off him. but today it was like a flip switched. you walked home soaked from the rain after not being to reach your boyfriend to pick you up. you get it he’s busy, but your blood boiled when you saw both of them sitting on the couch peacefully. she looked up at you and grinned as jaehyun ran up to you worried. “jaehyun lets talk in our room please” you simply asked. he followed you to you and his shared room with a towel drying you off as you spoke. “i really hate to do this to you but its either me or her.” he paused his movements of drying your hair “you know i cant do that. ive known her for so long do you not trust me?” he said defensive. “i dont trust her” you said blandly, he stared at you and started lecturing you on how his bestfriend gave you no reason to not trust her. you didnt argue back, you were too tired for it you just said “she likes you jaehyun”. he paused and continued lecturing you about how thats ridiculous. you shake your head and pack your things “clearly i know your answer.” he continues on and on on how youre being ridiculous. once you leave the door he puts his hand in his face.
! - it took him like 5 minutes to realize he messed up (bye.) his friend came into your room and sat down by him as he listened to him rant. “you know…” she said slowly “y/n’s not wrong” his ears perked up at that “ive always liked you jaehyun, your just too silly to realize.” he freezes at her words, feeling his blood run cold he feels her fingers on his chin and her leaning in. he backs up and kicks her out despite her protest. once he locked the door and is left in the empty haunting house alone he scrambles for his phone. after finding it he opens it to all your messages asking if he can pick you up. it made him nauseous at the thought he left you alone and cold for his ‘friend’ that was the cause of your breakup. he calls you to which you dont answer, he starts panicking at this point and paces in the house as he mass text and call you just wanting a answer. he pauses in front of him at the only room he hasnt stepped room in since pacing. your bedroom. he walks in and lays down only to be reminded of your scent when he lifts the blankets over his head. thats when he starts crying and realized you weren’t there to hold him like you normally did
! - he didnt have his safe space anymore.
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H. TAESAN ; distant
! - you hated to admit it but one of the things that drew you into taesan was the thing that made you end things. his cold demeanor was what made everyone so curious about him, fortunately or unfortunately you were the one he picked to be into his very small circle to which you became his partner. during this you learned he loved his alone time which you were fine with, what threw you off was the way he signaled to you he wanted to be alone. he would ignore you in public and not reply to your messages as if you didnt know each other. you were okay with it at first since you loved your strange boyfriend but after a while you grew tired of it. tired of breaking down his walls and when you finally feel accepted by him only to be shut out again
! - and clearly it was a mistake bringing it up to him because it lead him to being the loudest you ever heard him, arguing back and forth. “i dont get why you just have to pretend you don’t know me. im fine with you needing your alone space but why do you have to act like you hate me?”
“im starting to if thats how your gonna react to me needing my time every so often.”
you couldnt argue anymore, especially when he just admitted he was close to hating you for communicating your feelings. the room went quiet, taesan looks over his shoulder to see you staring at the ground before walking off. after that day you didnt text first or initiate anything to see if he would, unfortunately to you. he didnt.
! - it took him about a month to realize he messed up (sorry taesan lovers:c). but dont get me wrong, its not like he went on with his life like normal. everyday it felt like he was missing something but he could never put his finger on this feeling so he just dismissed it. until one day by instinct he sat at your twos spot alone and your guys song started to play in his headphones. he was never one to communicate his feelings too well but that didnt mean he didnt care for you. he would dedicate songs to you and one just fit perfectly with you two. when the song played he looked around and realized where he was with what song was playing only to see something is missing
you.
and thats when it hit him, he didnt get his usual messages, his hugs, or his sneaky looks from you. he was alone, but wasnt this what he wanted?
he wanted to be alone right?
he loved it.
right?
he then realized
he loves you more then he loved being alone.
was it worth it to lose one thing you love more to prioritize the other?
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K.LEEHAN ; too friendly
! - from the beginning you knew dating leehan came with a price. everyone wanted him. some more bold than others that would go up to him and ask him out even when he had a partner. his reaction to these admirers was a stranger then how a boyfriend would react to girls hitting on him. he’d entertain the girls in front for you just to see your reaction. you knew he loved seeing you jealous which was cute at first but after a while it got old. it started to make you doubt whether he really loved you or not. if the girls would compliment leehan he’d start asking for details, “oh yeah? how much do you like me?” “my arms are pretty strong arent they?” or he’d start teasing “calm down my partners infront of me, maybe later” to which the girls, including him would laugh as he looked over to see your fuming face.
! - but this one time, you couldnt take it anymore. if this is what dating someone admired upon was like, you wanted no part. it was like normal. girls would swarm around you and leehan and start flirting, but his one comment ticked you off. “yeah of course we can hangout, im sure my partner wont mind” he winked, he looks over at you expecting to see your puffy angry face but is met with you leaving the table. he follows behind you calling for you. when he finally catches up to you thats when you spew everything youve been feeling. “i can understand if your admired i get it your handsome! but your taken and you should know that, no normal boyfriend flirts back with girls who flirt with him. i have to deal with this closing feeling in my throat and chest all because you want a little enjoyment for your day and im done.” he looked at you confused with a hint of being offended. “youre overreacting yn.” he said before being cut off with you walking away.
! - he realized he messed up 6 days later. its not like he didnt care, but he was in his state of mind that youll run back like any of his fangirls would. during those days he continued to flirt back with them now that his flock was much bigger now that he was single. but this time he flirted back much less enthusiastic as he would before, because he had no reason to, no reaction, no partner to coddle after. he now felt sick with the thought of flirting with anyone to start dating if it wasnt you. he got up from the table to which he recieved a bunch of whines and pleads to stay. he just needed fresh air. he continued walking around campus until he heard a familiar laugh. he turned his head over and seen you with another person, laughing and getting all close like you and him use too. now staring from afar he understood what you meant. he felt his chest and throat closing at the thought sight of you reliving what you and him would do with someone that wasnt him. and his words replay in his mind
“you’re overreacting yn”
“your overreacting”
“overreacting”
in fact you were not overreacting but he knew he had no right to be jealous, when his urge for you to be jealous tore you two apart.
he was on the verge of spilling his guts and you looked happy. not angry, and thats what you deserved
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K. WOONHAK ; always mad at you
! - woonhak has always been very open about his anger issues and you knew that. he was just a teen living his first life and you acknowledged that. on certain days he would hold grudges against you and not tell you why he was angry, leaving you alone to figure out and trace back to see what you had done. and it was always something small like giving him only 2 hugs instead of 3 for morning, afternoon, and night. and forbid you try to get him to communicate why he is mad at you. he’ll turn into a big angry ball yelling at every reason he should be mad
! - this one day you were so tired from school. you just wanted to walk home with your boyfriend and hopefully cuddle at home. but he wasnt waiting for you outside your class, instead you already saw him walking out of the school. catching up to him you say hi and start asking him about his day to which you recieve a mean face ignoring you. deciding to avoid that you talked about your day to which he paid no attention to. thats when you snapped “hey im talking to you!” no reply “why do you always do this, you just get mad at me and expect me to read your mind!” he turned over to you and yelled back “i dont know why you can never just think, is it that hard to realize what you did?” “no i cant read your mind woonhak!”. he just turned away and started to walk “woonhak if you keep walking were over!” he paused, to which you hoped he’d come to his senses but he kept walking
! - he realized he messed up 1 days after. day 1, he completely forgot about the night before as it was so normal for him to go back to not being mad at you when he felt like it. when you didnt walk to school with him he decided that was his reasoning for being mad you today. and when you didnt run up to him or walk up to him after school to walk together he started to be a bit confused. here is when youd start to cave but as he walked home he retraced his memory with each step and remembered what you had said when he was being petty.
‘ “woonhak if you keep walking were over!” ‘
he just kept walking, and now you werent his to walk anymore.
-
“is it so wrong of me to hope she breaks your heart, is it so wrong for me to pray she tears you apart?”
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leclarifies · 6 days ago
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THE NUMBER YOU HAVE DIALED IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE (LN4)
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꒰ lando norris x ex!reader ꒱
synopsis┊in which lando keeps dialing your number even after you've changed it.
genre┊angst (im not sorry)
word count┊ 2.1k
aria yaps┊remember how i broke ur hearts with carlos sainz angst for my first fic about him? YEAH HERE'S THE LANDO VERSION!!!!!!!! i know yall love it either way so, enjoy reading! very short btw, i just wanted to put something out for today
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"where did we go wrong? i know we started out all right. where did we go wrong? i swear i knew we'd last this time." - lany, "13"
it takes three rings.
then he hears that stupid automated voice again, "the number you have dialed is currently unavailable or disconnected, please try—"
"for fuck's sake."
after he ends the attempted call, the furious typing is apparent in the empty, dark room. the artificial keyboard clicking fills the room as he tries his best to reach her. it's futile really, with every text he sends, the more agitated he becomes.
he knew that he shouldn't do this, that she was probably trying her best to move on, but he couldn't. he couldn't let her slip away from his grasp so easily.
"i just want you here for my races, is that so hard to ask for?" lando sounded desperate, he was desperate. he was a guy who needed his girlfriend and it didn't help that his girlfriend couldn't be there with him when he needed it the most, especially at times like these.
she was tired, he could tell, he didn't want to turn this into an argument but he was going to base it off of how she was going to respond, "lando, i can't. you know this. i have family here that i need to support, i can't just quit—"
"i'm not asking you to quit, i'm asking you to come just when you can," lando ruffled his hair so hard that it hurt, "the races are on weekends— for fuck's sake! why can't you just listen to me and actually hear what i'm saying?"
"i am listening! you're not listening to me!" she had tears in her eyes now, he hated it. he hated when he got riled up like this. it wasn't her fault, he knew it but he wanted her around him at least every few races, he hadn't been able to see her on the paddock at all this year and it pained him.
an exasperated sigh leaves his lips and he tries calling again, he knows she's not gonna pick up. he knows that he's probably blocked everywhere, but he wants to try. he wants to talk. he just wanted to fix things.
"the number you have dialed is—"
the next thing he heard was his phone shattering against the wall after he threw it across the room.
it was only two days later when he got a new phone and tried again, it wasn't going to go through. he knew it, but he just wanted to try. he wanted to show her that he was willing to make a compromise with her, just to make sure that she was there for him.
he didn't understand why he raised his voice so easily when it came to her, maybe because emotions ran high and he didn't know what else to do to express himself. he didn't know. all he knew was that he was a selfish prick and he deserved all of this.
he tried again.
"the number you have dialed is cu—"
he wanted to smash that brand new phone into the wall like its predecessor but he held himself back, he knew that the money that was needed to buy him a new phone was priceless to him, he was a formula one driver. it was pennies to him. all that money and he couldn't keep the most priceless thing to him, her.
he didn't care how selfish it sounded, or how convoluted their issues were. he just wanted her here, to hug, to kiss, to just comfort him. he had so many things on his mind right now and it could've been solved just by a simple touch and kiss to the forehead.
he was losing his mind and he knew it.
something akin to a sob bubbles from his throat when he hears the automated voice again.
"the number you have dialed is currently unavailable or disconnected, please try again later."
he fucked up, he knows now. she didn't have to rub it in his face like this, by changing her number and disappearing off of the face of the earth.
he just wanted to be home.
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gentle knocking wakes her up from her slumber, it's unusual to get guests at this hour and on top of that, she wasn't expecting anyone. a huff escapes her lips as she gently takes the covers off of her and sits up on the bed. the knocks become more persistent as she begrudgingly gets up from her comfortable bed.
at first, she contemplates whether she should open the door or not but she opens it against her better judgement, her eyes widening when she realizes who it was.
"lando, what are you doing here? aren't you supposed to be in aus—"
she gets engulfed in a hug before she could even utter another word.
inhaling her scent after so long had been a breath of a fresh air for lando, he missed her. she's confused on how lando even knows where she lived. she had moved out of her last flat to avoid him on purpose, and now he's here, when he's supposed to be all the way in australia getting ready for a race.
his hug wasn't reciprocated, unfortunately for him.
"lando—" she was cut off by her ex standing in front of her, his eyes were glassy, puffy, like he had been crying all the way from australia to here.
"i just wanted to see you, that's all."
"we broke up two months ago, you can't just show up in front of my flat like this."
"i know but—"
"there aren't any buts lando, didn't me changing my number make it clear to you?" she folded her arms in front of her chest, her hair was still a mess from sleep and she was in pajamas, but her eyes were nowhere near his, not wanting to have any type of eye contact.
lando could only look down on the ground in embarrassment, he knew it was wrong. he knew he shouldn't have asked her friends where she lived, all of them had turned down his questions, telling him that she wanted nothing to do with him anymore but it wasn't anything a little persistence couldn't solve.
"is that all? you have a race to catch," she didn't even give him the chance to speak before trying to close the door on his face, but he blocked it with his foot, he wanted to talk. to fix things. he knew that things were irreparable but he wanted to try.
lando pushes the door open, despite her insistence of not letting him in, "i want to fix things, love—"
"there's nothing to fix lando, we're done. we've been done. what part of done do you not understand?" she was on the verge of tears, she didn't want to end it with lando, no, not at all but she felt that it was best for the both of them, she couldn't provide him with what he needed and he couldn't with her either, so it was best to just separate because why be in a relationship when you don't feel the love?
her eyes were still on the floor, not even daring to look up at lando's. it hurt for her too of course, just throwing away their year-long relationship out the window when the beginning of their relationship was so lovely, but now all there was is resentment and she didn't want that in her relationship.
lando couldn't utter anything out his mouth, he was stuck in place by her words. he let himself in earlier after he pushed the door open, he gently closed the door behind him before sighing, "we didn't even talk about it, you just decided for yourself that you didn't want to be apart of this anymore, you didn't even wait until my race ended before i could respond. how can i let it go?"
she swallowed the lump in her throat as she looked out the window, still refusing to look at lando, because she knew that if she did, she would start crying, "you just do lando. sometimes break-ups aren't always mutual, sometimes it's one person who doesn't want to be in a relationship anymore. it takes two to tango."
lando tousled with his hair, what could he say to that? she wasn't wrong. she couldn't deny the hurt and sadness that was in his green eyes, she hated that she made him feel that way but they were nothing. they've been broken up. by definition, they didn't have anything to do with eachother anymore, but she still had that care inside of her heart for him. after all, it had only been two months.
"just hear me out, and by the end of tonight, if you don't want to see me anymore, i'm gone. i won't try to contact you anymore," lando gave an ultimatum and she was fine with that, because she knew well that whatever he said, she would still say no.
she sat down on her couch, patting the space next to her to at least give him some sort of hospitality, wanting to hear him out even though she was steadfast in her decision.
"i won't bug you to come to my races anymore, i'll even help you with helping your family—"
"you can't throw money at this problem, lando."
"i'm not throwing money at it, i'm just saying that it's an option and you can take it if you feel like you need it," lando's voice was always pleading— begging for her to hear him out. he wasn't that type of guy, never. all of his exes got the same type of treatment, if they said that they were done, then lando wouldn't even bother.
he was a formula one driver, he didn't have the time.
but for her, he did.
she looks up, her arms still folded in front of her chest, legs curled up beneath her as she tries to find a comfortable position in an uncomfortable situation. glancing at the clock on the coffee table, it read in bright red neon numbers that it at 4:27 am, far too early or late for him to be here.
"we've had a similar conversation before, and i refused. so i'm refusing again," she sighs before meeting lando's eyes for the second time tonight, "i don't understand why you would want to keep this relationship. it doesn't benefit you for dating a poor girl."
"do you really think i care about your financial status?" lando asked, almost if it the thought of him caring about his (ex)girlfriend's financial status was ridiculous. he didn't care, it's the way she made him feel for the entirety of last year. she made him feel whole, like even if the world was against him, she would still be there.
she was used to men coming into her life who could think that they could "save" her and lando was no different to all of those other men. sure, she was definitely struggling trying to pay for her younger siblings education while working and pursuing her degree at the same time but that doesn't mean she was a damsel in distress and she expressed that to lando.
lando closed his eyes in frustration, "no, i didn't mean it like that—"
"well you sure as hell worded it like that," she looks away from him yet again, refusing to meet his eyes again until he had to leave. her eyes were glued to the window that overlooked the city, it was beautiful, calming— peaceful even, "i'm not changing my mind lando, we're worlds apart. i don't need you helping me, i can take care of myself."
with that, lando bit his lip and she ushers him out of her flat.
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it had been months since lando's seen her, but he never forgot. he couldn't. the way she smelt, the way she laughed, everything still stuck in his brain as he continued his career.
the world didn't revolve around him, so the show must go on.
calling her old number had also become routine, almost an obsession. every finish, every weekend, anything that had to do with his career, lando would try and call her and tell her how his races were going, as if he wasn't talking to an automated robot on the other end of the line. the automated voice was practically his best friend because he's heard the damn voice so many times.
"the number you have dialed is currently unavailable or disconnected. please try again later."
and try again later he would.
he didn't understand himself, was it an obsession or was it the comfort that it gave him when he dialed her number? he didn't know. but sometimes he would hold up that phone to his ear and talk as if she was on the other end of the line, even though lando knew that there was no one waiting on the other line for him, not anymore.
but, the show must go on, right?
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sebscore · 2 years ago
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gen-z driver chaotically taking over martin’s grid walk? thank you!!
KEEPING UP WITH THE GRID
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pairings: f1 team principals, drivers and ex-driver x driver!reader (im too lazy to name everyone im sorry)
warnings: swearing. christian horner. mention of a nipple tweak.
author's note: anon, you are a legend for requesting this! I'm not too proud of the writing, since I wrote this in the middle of the night and my brain doesn't function normally then. but i hope you like it anyway, darling! let me know your thoughts!!
masterlist
• • • • • • •
Y/N was mindlessly scrolling through her phone when a sudden loud voice interrupted her peaceful time. ''How are we feeling about today, Y/N?'' Martin bent his knees, so he could hold the mic up to her face as she sat on the ground. 
''Oh my god, you scared the shit out of me.'' She cursed, quickly covering her mouth as she knows she isn't supposed to swear on Sky Sports. ''Uh, I'm feeling pretty good about it, I'm starting on the second row, so not too bad.'' The driver answered his question, smiling sheepishly. 
''You like having alone time before a race?'' He continued, a grin on his face. 
Y/N shrugged her shoulders. ''I just happen to be alone right now, sometimes I'm chatting with my team or with some of the other drivers.'' 
''Martin, you look a bit tired, you want to sit down?'' She patted the space next to her, feeling bad that he was crouching down while she comfortably sat on the grass. 
The former F1 driver held a look of surprise on his face. ''In all my years I've been doing this, no one has ever offered me to sit down.'' He gave the camera a glance before slowly letting himself sink to the ground. 
''You know, people always wonder 'Where is Martin?' But no one ever wonders 'How is Martin?' We need to take better care of you.'' The man seemed clueless about what she was saying, but he was amused either way. 
''I'm alright, all that walking takes a lot of energy.'' He responded, pretending to wipe sweat off his forehead. 
Y/N chuckled. ''Yeah, I mean, you've been doing this longer than I've been alive, so I understand that you're tired from all the walking.'' She never let the oppurtunity slip to make him aware of their age gap. 
''Well, let's not talk age,'' he sighed, making her laugh, ''anyway, I think I might just hang around here for the entire segment.'' Martin concluded. 
An idea popped into her head as she heard his words. ''Can I do it? I've always wanted to do it.'' 
Martin was surprised for a second time since joining the young woman. ''You mean I let you go around the grid and talk to people?'' 
She nodded. ''Yes, I love bothering people with my presence.'' Y/N said, matter-of-factly. 
The Brit looked at his cameraman, who adamantly nodded his head to the idea of letting the driver do her thing around the grid. 
Martin let out a deep breath, but handed his mic and headset over. ''Just don't get me fired,'' he said, trying to sound stern, ''and don't curse!'' He quickly added. 
''I won't, I promise! I'll see you later!'' She got up from the ground and put the headset on, slightly altering it so it fit her head perfectly. ''Alright, let's make some controversy.'' Y/N exclaimed, pulling the cameraman along. 
She glanced around the grid, trying to find some interesting people to talk to. ''So, I just need to find a person and ask them questions about whatever I want?'' The athlete asked the cameraman, who simply nodded his head, making the camera shake as well.
''Oh, I love this program!'' She giggled into the microphone, doing a small jump out of happiness. 
Y/N observed the grid, knowing her first ''guest'' needed to be a good one. ''Okay, I've found someone!'' She let the cameraman know, pointing in the direction she wanted to go. 
''Alright,'' she tapped the person's shoulder, having them turn to the camera in confusion, ''the first guest on Y/N's grid walk is the team principal of Mercedes… Petronas… Benz…,'' she tried remembering the full team name, ''Whatever, his name is Susie's husband! Welcome, Susie's husband.'' She introduced Toto. 
The Austrian man was incredibly entertained by the young woman's antics. ''Hello, Y/N.'' 
''I have to ask you- how does it feel to be married to the greatest woman alive?'' She asked him, glancing around to find the woman in question. 
Toto laughed at the question, but proceeded. ''It's great, Susie is an amazing person who has done countless amazing projects and campaigns- I'm a very lucky man.'' The sincere smile on Toto's face when talking about his wife brought a smile to Y/N's face. 
''That's so cute- where is she? I only came over here, because I thought she would be here.'' 
''Unfortunately, she's not here today,'' he told her in a sad tone, ''I know that upsets you, Y/N.'' The driver's girl crush on Susie had been an obvious thing for many years, amusing everyone involved. 
Y/N pouted at his words. ''Well, yeah… that upsets me a lot actuall-''
''What is going on here?'' A British accent interrupted her interview with the team principal. 
''Go away, Russell George! I don't want you on my show.'' Y/N teasingly dismissed George, slapping his arm to get him out of frame. 
The Mercedes driver feigned offense, placing his hand on his heart. ''Why not? I thought we were great friends, Y/L.'' 
''Crikey, crikey, crikey! Don't you have shirtless pictures to post somewhere? Bye bye!'' She quickly got away from the Mercedes team, practically running at one point. 
Y/N let out a big sigh into the mic. ''Martin was right, this is tiring,'' she momentarily stopped in her steps, her hand on her waist, ''OH! Look! It's Charles Lechair!'' Her tiredness from a few seconds before was long forgotten as she strided over to her Monégasque friend. 
''Charles, hello, Charles!'' She put her hand on his back, guiding him to the camera. ''How are you feeling about the race today? What are the strategies? Do they know that word at Ferrari?'' She teased the red team. 
''Uh, we're feeling optimistic today and yeah, I'm ready to give it my all.'' He smiled, putting up his tv-friendly facade, not wanting to trash talk his team on television. 
Y/N raised her eyebrow. ''You're so cute being all positive! Keep that attitude, Perceval!'' She patted his shoulder. ''Thanks for talking to me and good luck!'' She bid him goodbye. 
The young driver walked in all sorts of directions. There were many people present on the grid, yet Y/N had quite a hard time finding people to talk to. It was when she walked by the Red Bull team that she found her next victim. 
''Christian! Christian Horner, hello, welcome!'' She and the team principal didn't have the best history, but she knew the viewers would enjoy the interaction as they knew said history. 
''Everyone, I'm joined here today by Red Bull, uh, Orange, Racing or whatever, F1 Team's team principal, Christian Horner.'' She butchered the team name again, although it was one purpose this time. 
She turned towards the man. ''Christian, I won't hold you up too long, but there is one question that our viewers have been dying to ask you and I think this is the right time to finally do it.'' Y/N build the question up. 
''Yes?'' He seemed a bit nervous, attentively listening to her words. 
''Can you say one nice thing about Y/N Y/L?'' 
The Brit visibly looked relieved at the question, thinking it would be something controversial. ''Of course, she's, uh, a very talented race car driver.'' He nervously smiled at her. 
''You heard it here first, ladies and gentlemen, Christian Horner thinks Y/N Y/L is the most talented driver in the history of Formula One!'' She overdramatized his response. 
''You know what they say, keep your friends close, but keep your enemies even closer.'' She patted Christian's shoulder. ''Thanks for the talk, good luck and I hope you don't win.'' Y/N told him before walking off, hearing him laugh behind her. 
''So far, I've talked to Toto Wolff and Christian Horner,'' she said to the camera, ''enemies to, uh, even worser enemies, I guess.'' 
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''Guys, we're here with Yuki's boyfriend, Pierre Gasly.'' Y/N stood next to the Alpha Tauri driver, shoving the microphone in his face. He took his airpods out of his ears, already chuckling at the girl's actions. 
''How are you doing?'' 
''I'm-''
''That's all the time we have for you, I'm sorry.'' She didn't let him finish his words and walked away from him, quickly giving him a smile so he knew she was entirely joking. 
She stepped further onto the grid, continuing to look for people. ''A bunch of green outfits, not very fashionable- oh, it's Aston Martin! Let's find Sebastian!'' Y/N mixed herself with the Aston Martin team, trying to catch the German driver.��
''Seb! Seb! Can I ask you a few questions?'' She eventually reached the man, greeting him with a kiss on the cheek. 
His signature bright smile covered his face. ''Yeah, but where's Martin?'' 
''Me and Martin made an agreement, I get to do the grid walk and he gets to drive my car later- although, he never won any races, so that might not have been a great decision on my part.'' She told Sebastian, who seemed confused and fascinated at the same time. 
''Well, I think you're doing a great job as reporter.'' He deflected her words, not wanting to get in trouble by saying anything about Brundle's lack of GP wins. 
She smiled. ''Thanks, anyway… I know qualifying didn't go too well for you, but are you optimistic about the race?'' 
''Yeah, quali wasn't what we were hoping for,'' he sighed, ''It's gonna be difficult today, but we're gonna try our best to get as much points as we can for the championship.'' Sebastian finished his answer with an encouraging nod. 
''That's great to hear! You've been- oh my god, is that your dad?'' Y/N had glanced away from Sebastian's face for one second and saw Norbert watching them, waving at her once he noticed her looking at him. ''Okay, bye Sebastian! I'm gonna talk to your dad now.'' 
She walked past the Aston Martin driver to approach his father. ''Can I ask you some questions? I swear it's very short.'' She didn't want to burden him for too long. 
Norbert gave her a thumbs up, not minding being interviewed for a short time by her. ''It's okay.'' 
''Amazing! I mean, you're a legend of the paddock, Norbert! The drivers love you, the fans love you, everyone just loves you! Do you feel the love every time you attend a GP?''
Y/N had a good relationship with him as he and Sebastian would sometimes attend her karting tournaments together. Norbert had given her parents advice on how to support the young girl as best as possible. In a nutshell, the Vettel family were some of the greatest people she had ever met. 
''I do feel it, it's a great feeling and everyone is so nice to me.'' He wasn't very confident in his English, so he kept it short. 
Y/N smiled at him, delighted she got the chance to talk to him. ''You're always super sweet to everyone, so it's only right that we reciprocate your kindness,'' she nodded, ''okay, last question! Apart from Seb, who is the driver you're rooting for today? Is it someone you know very well? Or someone who is standing next to you and is asking you amazing questions?'' She played with a strand of her hair, pretending like she wasn't talking about herself. 
He laughed at her words. ''I'm supporting you, of course!'' He exclaimed, his arm going around her shoulder. 
''Oh! You're the best, Norbert! You're my favorite Vettel for a reason!'' Y/N said extra loud, knowing Sebastian would hear it that way. 
''I'll leave you alone now, thank you so much and I'll see you after the race.'' She gave him a brief hug and he wished her good luck, which she thanked him for. 
The cameraman had difficulties keeping up with her, used to the slower pace of Martin. Y/N noticed this and slowed down, sending him an apologetic look. ''Alright, I've talked to Seb, so I feel obligated to talk to Lewis now.'' She commented, trying to look for the 7x World Champion. 
''Where is he? He shouldn't be this hard to find…'' The athlete always saw the Mercedes driver hanging around the grid, chatting with his celebrity friends or getting ready with Angela. 
Y/N frowned. ''I should lore him or something…,'' she thought for a moment, ''vegan food, I have vegan food! Uh, free skydiving session! Oh my god, is that Roscoe on the track?'' She tried making him appear, but the only thing she got was weird looks from bypassers. 
However, a certain blond man caught her attention instead. ''Okay, I can't find Lewis, but this person knows him very well… or used to at least.'' 
''Britney Spears! Can I interview you for the highly respected tv-show, Y/N's grid walk?'' She snuck up to the former Mercedes driver, catching him off guard, but he played it off. ''Sure, I'm very honored.'' His monotone voice almost made her cringe. 
''First question: is it alright if I call you Britney? I don't know how you feel about the nickname.'' 
Nico chuckled at her. ''You can call me that, Y/N.'' 
''Ooooh~ I'm getting special privileges! I like it!'' She was impressed by Nico's answer, not being sure if he would go along with her humor. 
''Next question! How does it feel to be a Monaco based Youtuber? Do you enjoy the influencer life?'' 
The former World Champion snickered at her question, not expecting her to bring up his Youtube channel. ''It feels great, I'm, uh, yeah, enjoying the influencer life.'' She could tell Nico was doing his best to come off as positive as possible. 
''Nice, good for you, dude! Anyway, this was Britney, the man who beat the 7x World Champion, Lewis Hamilton, in equal machinery in 2016!'' She quoted the meme that was often made online when people talked about Rosberg. 
Y/N didn't wait for Nico's reaction, a bit too scared if she was honest, and made a run for it again. ''I've talked to three German guys- wait, is Nico German? He said once that he doesn't drink beer, so I don't know if he's considered German.'' She rambled on, not even listening to the words that were leaving her own mouth. 
''There's Jenson.'' She caught the Brit talking to his Sky Sports colleagues. ''You know what? I've embarrassed myself enough already, I'm not making it any worse.'' Y/N went in another direction so as to not cross paths with him. 
''Too bad he doesn't drive anymore, I would have loved to give him a lucky nipple tweak.'' Martin and Jenson used to have this running gag of the older man giving him a nipple tweak for good luck before a race. 
Y/N didn't see where she was going and almost tripped over someone's foot. ''Oh, shit!'' She loudly exclaimed, balancing herself so she wouldn't fall. ''Oh, fuck I can't swear- wait, shit! Ugh!'' She pulled the microphone away from her face, that way her curses wouldn't be picked up. 
''This isn't live, right? Cause then I'm in trouble, I think.'' She glanced at the cameraman, who mumbled a small ''It is live.'' 
''THIS IS LIVE?'' Y/N gasped, looking absolutely horrified at the thought of thousands of people watching her at that moment. ''Let's find Martin then, I think I've done enough damage.'' 
She headed back to the place where the presenter had approached her. ''Martin! Where is Martin?'' The driver glimpsed around, but no Martin in sight. ''I have oatmeal!'' She yelled, before making eye contact with the camera. ''Old people love oatmeal, right?'' He simply chuckled, not wanting to shake the camera too much with his laughing. 
''Oh, there he is!'' Y/N spotted the man and made her way over to him as fast as she could. ''I definitely didn't say anything controversial or cursed throughout the entire thing.'' She greeted him. 
Martin looked relieved as she handed his microphone and headset back over to him. ''I was out of my element for a while,'' he joked, ''did you have fun, darling?'' 
Y/N nodded her head. ''Yes, I'm even considering changing career paths.'' She chuckled. 
''That's great,'' Martin smiled, confident she made some amazing television, ''well, I think you're gonna have to go, cause I can see your, uh, coach not looking too happy.'' He pointed towards her performance coach staring daggers at her. 
''Oh, fuck, yeah, bye Martin! Thank you so much!'' Y/N quickly thanked the man for letting her take over his segment and she dashed out of there, hoping her team wouldn't be too upset about her disappearing into the grid to ask everyone ridiculous questions. 
''She's a special one for sure.'' 
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6K notes · View notes
kryptznnn · 23 days ago
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♛- Come back to bed
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➸ INTERESTS; -jjk! nanami kento x f!reader
➸ BACKGROUND; -not any plot truly, just straight smut, making love late at night MY FAV!! (im a whole virgin)
➸ WARNINGS; - wc.2.4k, kissing, teasing, riding, fingering, p in v, nipple play, sucking, whining, bla bla bla
➸a.i; - omg new oneshot!! i made a poll asking who i should write abt this morning and 100 votes came in for my sexy baby daddy so im here to feed u guys!! xoxo
.☘︎ ݁˖.☘︎ ݁˖.☘︎ ݁˖.☘︎ ݁˖
You awoke in the middle of the night to your phone ringing softly, the vibrations from it on your nightstand making you get up. As you turned to grab your phone, the call ended, you only muttered to yourself as you were now sat up in your bed. You held your phone in your hand, realizing the call was from your close friend and checked the time.
1:13am, you read with a squint, still trying to adjust to the dimly lit screen this late at night.
There were only two reasons as to why she could call you this late. She was either having intrusive thoughts about breaking contact with her ex, or she was calling to tell you how drunk she was at her apartment, and she wants you to come and accompany her. You stood up, grabbing your soft silk robe from your closet door and stepped out of the room.
You made your way over to the kitchen, dialing her number back and waiting for her to answer. You grabbed a water bottle and opened it when she soon answered. Rambling on about how drunk she was and how much fun she was having, saying she didn't want you to miss out on it and for you to come over to her place, you only smiled and shook your head.
"It's past 1am, I was asleep when you called, you need to get some sleep too unless if you don't plan on clocking in later." You spoke, drinking from your bottle as you listened to her ramble, sadly it's as if she hadn't heard a single word you said.
She was always like this honestly; you couldn't blame her. Between the two of you someone had to be outgoing and crazy enough to do things like this. You could never be mad at her for it though, it was sweet honestly, even when she was intoxicated, she always had you in mind.
The conversation between the two of you soon wrapped up, as she assured you, she wasn't alone and was with her brother. She even facetimed you as proof and to which you spoke to her brother for a while. Thankfully he was a little more responsible than she was, assuring you that the night had ended, and the drinks were being put away so his sister could rest.
You only thanked him and wished him a goodnight, as he did in return to you and you said goodbye to your friend, waving as you heard the call click. You finished your water bottle and went to place the bottle in the shared recycle can you had in the kitchen before feeling two firm arms snake their way around your waist.
You only smiled, knowing exactly who it was as you were used to this multiple times before. You placed your hands over his arms and squeezed, earning a tired grunt from him as he bent down to kiss the top of your head.
"If you weren't my fiancé I would've screamed when you touched me y'know?" You joked, feeling him smile against the top of your head, he let go of your waist as you let go of his arms and he placed his hand in yours. He soon guided you out of the kitchen and back to the shared bedroom you two had, the dim lights from outside helping you to see his figure perfectly.
Your fiancé was a well-kept man, perfectly built as if sculpted by the gods. Honestly, even as a woman you were envious of his body, but when compared to others you were considered lucky, very lucky. So, you couldn't push it too much, because they were right, you were lucky.
"Come back to bed" Kento spoke, now entering your bedroom and sitting on your side of the bed where you were previously resting. You only smiled at him as you placed your phone back down on the nightstand, he never let go of your free hand, pulling you near him.
"You're such a flirt" you said to him, watching his every move. He only hummed in response and kissed your palm as you made your way on top of him, straddling him now. His other hand made its way to your lower back, now keeping you in place as his kisses traveled higher, from your palm to your arm and now your shoulder, not removing his eyes from yours.
You looked away nervously, feeling a familiar tingle in your lower belly, you knew exactly what he was doing. He soon placed his hand from your lower back onto the back of your neck, slowly bringing your head down to kiss him passionately. It felt nice, he felt nice, you couldn't complain, nor could you just turn or look away from him, you were captivated by him.
You were the first to pull away, your breathing heavy as you looked at him, he still kept his hand on the back of your head. He only pushed your head back for your lips to connect yet again, but not kissing the same as before. It was wet and sloppy, your tongues practically fighting-
no,
Dancing with one another, and it only made the weak feeling within your lower belly stronger as he moved his hands, now gripping both sides of your hips as he kissed you eagerly. You quickly pulled away, covering your mouth and wiping out of embarrassment as a small line of saliva dripped from it and down to your chin.
He only looked at you with a cheerful smile, loosening his grip on your hips and began to tug on your robe, wanting it to come off. In all seriousness, you weren't even properly dressed, without the robe you only had on a small black tank-top and red panties.
You let go of him for an instant, taking off your robe and tossing it, he smirked in approval. As you straddled him again you could feel him underneath you, the friction becoming unbearable as he continued to rub himself against one of your most vulnerable places. Well not him genuinely speaking, it was his co-
"Can I play with you baby? Just for a little while?" He asked, looking into your eyes and then your lips for an answer. You responded with a 'yes', soon after biting your bottom lip and watching his movements. Now seated in the middle of the bed you two shared he began to kiss your skin above your collarbone while you grinded on him, both of you partially clothed and breathing heavily.
He had gone to bed with nothing but his boxers on, but now he was threatening to take them off in one quick move, unable to bear the teasing anymore. His hands roamed your body, teasing your nipples through your top as you mewled softly, grabbing his wrist softly as you guided his hand lower to your now wet spot on your underwear.
Throughout the time of your twos dirty work not a word was spoken to one another, well, barely. You had known each other's bodies well enough and exactly what you craved, Kento knew this and quickly got to work, unbuttoning the one small button that was practically ready to burst out from his erection, letting it spring out free.
When you moved back a little to look at it, it looked like he was in pain. Like painfully hard, honestly this wasn't the first time, but it was sweet seeing how you had him this intense every time, he never seized to amaze you. He began to tug at your underwear, to which you got off the bed, standing up as he watched your every move.
You bent over, hooking your thumbs into the hems of your underwear where they sat nice and pretty on your hips, shimmying a little as you pulled them all the way down to your ankles and stepped out of them. You slowly made your way back onto the bed and on top of Nanami once again, who only looked at you in awe, and maybe hunger.
You only cupped your hands on both of his cheeks before kissing him again, this time he kept a hand on your hip as another one found its way to your core. He cupped it softly as you jolted slightly, feeling his middle finger brush against your clit. He smiled into the kiss, placing his thumb over your clit and rubbing it gently, feeling the vibrations of you grunting and moaning in his mouth.
You pulled away, keeping a hand over your mouth yet again and his own mouth as you felt him insert a finger inside you. Immediately pushing up into you as far as he could, watching as your shivered slightly, and removed your hand from his mouth, moaning into your hand. He soon removed his hand from your hip and grabbed your wrist, removing your hand from your mouth and kissed your palm yet again.
Within a short period of time, you felt an immense amount of pressure build up inside of you, making you immediately want to shut your legs. (Un)fortunately, your fiancé had already caught onto this, quick to hold one of your legs apart as he now quickened his pace, smirking at you.
He soon grabbed a hold on your tank-top after you promised to not close your legs, lifting and revealing your hardened nipples to him and the cold air of the room. He chuckled to himself slightly as he stuck his tongue out, teasing you and watching as your back arched before sucking on them and inserting another finger.
You quickly grabbed onto his shoulders, now riding his fingers as you were trying your best to reach your high and quickly, knowing he wouldn't let you cherish this bliss moment for long. He soon began to lick your upper torso, the sweat beads that rolled off your body were his to consume, as if your entire body was a drug he was high on.
It was as if you had jinxed it because just seconds before you were ready to cum, he quickly removed his fingers from within you, keeping his thumb on your clit and coming to a full stop in movement. Before you were even able to stop your moans and begin your whining and protests, he aligned his cock with your entrance.
Without warning or count he quickly thrusted himself inside, halting and burying himself within your chest as he moaned along with you, your nails now digging deeper into his shoulders. You had completely forgotten how vocal Kento was, damn near as vocal as you, and you loved every moment of it.
"No condom?" You gasped, now playing with his hair as he kept his head between year breasts, slowly moving inside you. He only shook his head slightly, bringing his head back up and looking you in the eyes and kissing you.
"You're to be my wife, no? Whatever my wife wants she gets." He only stated, now thrusting sloppily into you as you moaned. You attempted to bounce back on him while he thrusted into you, just for him to wrap both of his arms tightly around your bottom and thrust into you even harder.
Now repeating his earlier actions and sucking on your nipples, watching as you unraveled within his arms, only getting more turned on by the sight. His mouth now moved to your neck, giving you several hickeys and wet sloppy kisses.
As he quickened his pace you tapped his chest lightly, feeling the same blissful feeling as before coming back, your lower abdomen feeling as if it was floating while the rest of your body was hot and shaking. He only smiled, taking this as the most perfect time to tease you.
"M'gonna get you pregnant. It's what my wife wants, yeah? My baby is gonna grow right here..." He teased, placing his right hand on your belly and rubbing it as you mewled, nodding your head before you bent slightly, placing your head on his shoulder. Your high was approaching with great force and speed, barely able to contain it anymore.
"My beautiful girl is gonna be a mommy, are you excited baby? You excited that I get to fill you up?" He cooed, now rubbing your back with one hand and placing the other over your lower abdomen, pressing down slightly as your moans became louder. You hummed in response, nodding vigorously as your high had approached, exclaiming loudly, biting down on Kento's shoulder to control yourself as your body spasmed.
Your eyes rolled to the back of your head for only a moment, soon after you came down, your breathing ragged. His thrusts had now slowed down, becoming sloppier than before as he began to breath heavier, his orgasm not far behind from yours.
As verbal as he was before he wasn't that way now, focused on reaching his orgasm as he screwed his eyes shut, taking deep breaths. As your head rested on his shoulder you too began to moan aloud and grunt softly, his thrusts overstimulating you as you had just come down from your orgasm.
You quickly began to clench around his cock, attempting to make him reach his high sooner, which worked. He buried his face alongside your side as he huffed, muttering a series of words, words of praise if you will, before completely reaching his orgasm. His last thrust sent shivers down your spine as he came inside of you, not leaving a single drop to waste, staying inside of you for a moment before pulling out and kissing your shoulder.
"Are you alright?" He asked, as you pulled away, looking at him and smiling, nodding to him as you brushed his hair away from his face, that had to stuck to his temple from his sweat. He smiled softly at you, seeing your tired expression and actions before fixing your side of the bed to sleep before joining you on his side.
You two exchanged little to barely any conversation between drifting off to sleep, his arms wrapped around you as you rested on his chest. You both had thought of the idea of cleaning up in the shower or changing into new clothes, but you were too exhausted to do so.
The last thing you can vividly remember before drifting off to sleep was how you were going to hide the love bites and hickeys he had given you before work the following morning. Scarves or giant sweaters weren't even in the question as it was the middle of the summer, and you sweat easily.
You'd find out when you got there.
✴🕷 please do not copy, plagiarize, edit, or translate any works submitted by me. all works are originated and all other pictures used within those works are online images. thank you!! @kryptznnn
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fir3ylolol · 1 year ago
Note
i had an idea…i’ve been thinking A Lot about that one johnny cage skin with the red shirt where he has the forearm tattoos…. maybe they’re those long lasting temporary ones and he has them on for a movie? and reader is realllllly into them
place beyond the pines
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pairing: Johnny Cage x Reader
summary: your boyfriend comes home, with a couple of new additions 0.0
tw: vaginal penetration, fingering, afab reader, gn reader, slightly dirty talk, groping, established relationship, sloppy makeout, smut, shameless smut
a/n: im alive! ive beaten a cold, finally. glad to write again! it's almost break for me, so i'm gna try to stay consistent. and if not…don't be mad at me pls. ALSO check out my works in progress post linked in my pinned to see what's to come ;P
word count: 1.15 k
Ao3
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The front door shuts firmly, and you perk up at the sound. That sound means only one thing: your boyfriend is home. He’s not usually home at this hour, so you’re really excited to see him more after a long, lazy day in sweatpants and baggy t-shirts. But as you rush out to see him, you’re stopped by the sight in front of you. There, standing by the doorway, is Johnny, in a tight red compression shirt with the sleeves pushed up. On his exposed forearms, you see black and white American Traditional tattoos, interlaced with a snake twisting its way up his arm. You’re caught off-guard, frozen across the room from him as he puts his keys down on the entry table.
He turns to face you, with a wide but tired smile. But he notices your still state and his face drops slightly in confusion. He walks over, shaking your shoulders lightly. “Love? You ok there?” You snap out of it, shaking your head as you do. “Yeah, sorry, I just…what are those?” You shakily reach your arms out to trace down the patterns. He lifts them to meet your hands, smile returning, “Don’t you think they’re cool? They’re just temporary, but it’s for that movie I was just cast in. You know, ex-cons tend to have tattoos so,” he gestures with his head. You start to fluster further, feeling the warmth of his skin under the intricate patterns and artwork. Finally, the gears start turning in his head and he laughs lightly. “You like them, don’t you?” Your head bolts up, embarrassed that you were so blatantly called out. You shake your head rapidly, stepping back slightly. “No, I just think the art is cool!” He steps forward, smirking at how flustered you are, lightly grabbing your wrist.
“Really? Because it feels like you think it's hot, and it’s flustering you,” his other hand coming up to cup your face tenderly. You try to turn it into a joke, pushing past his touch to walk towards the kitchen. “Come on, stop playing. You must be hungry, ri-” You’re abruptly cut off as that familiar pair of arms wrap around your waist and hold you in place. You’re about to protest until you hear a gravely quiet voice in your ear, “You’re a shit liar, you know.” Suddenly, your feet no longer touch the ground, being carried towards the couch with little to no say. You would fight it but…you don’t really want to. Your eyes are locked on the sight of them, art straining against the veins that pop out of his skin as he constricts around you. You feel him slowly sit down, grip on you still tight as you end up on his lap. You expect him to ease up, but when has Johnny ever gone easy? You notice his hold on you loosening, but his hands start to travel. One traces its way up your chest, reaching your head and gently holding your jaw. The other slips towards your waistband, fingers moving teasingly slow. He leans his head forward, warm breath against your ear as he whispers, “I had a pretty long day…wanna help me relax, baby?” Overwhelmed slightly by him, you nod against his hold on your face.
You watch as his inked hand slides lower, not as teasing anymore. But he loves to put on a show, and he shuffles your sweatpants off slightly. His voice, slightly louder this time, rasps out, “Gotta make sure you can see the whole show.” Helping direct your head down, you watch as his fingers circle against your clit. You jolt at the feeling, but his grip on you tightens slightly, keeping your back pressed into his strong chest. You’re slightly dizzy, watching as he sinks one finger inside you, hand tensing at the feeling. You can feel a heavy sigh from him, as he continues to curl in and out of you. His thumb reaches up, returning to sit comfortably against your clit again. As he moves, speed increasing bit by bit, you can’t help to whine out. The sight of his detailed art disappearing inside you, the feeling of his rough thumb moving so softly. As he slides another finger in, a gentle moan slipping out, he lifts your head again. He tilts it back, resting it against his shoulder. You watch with half-lidded eyes as he brushes your face off, his face barely visible from your angle. But he never stops, steady pace as you squirm at the sensation. But his free hand shows up again, clinging to your chest. It’s as if he’s holding himself back from moving at a ruthless pace, but he can only hold so much back. You can hear murmurs echoing through his throat against your right ear, incoherent, but very much through gritted teeth.
Suddenly, he’s speeding up more, his hand on your chest loosening slightly. At the angle of your head, you can’t muffle yourself, louder and louder moans as his hand starts to grab and massage your chest. You can hear him clearer now, voice carrying better, “God, look at you. You look so good like this, spread out just for me. You feel so good, baby, shit.” You can feel him growing sloppier, and more impatient than before. But you’re not far from cumming, your hands desperately searching for purchase. One latches to his thigh under you, and the other on his wrist, moving as he pumps his fingers inside you. You help guide him slightly, shuddering as he touches the exact right spot. You’re nearly seeing stars, but you lift your head, letting it flop forward. His entire arm is moving at this point, both flexing at the effort he’s exerting. As you manage to gasp out that you’re close, the hand on your chest lets go and shoots back to your jaw. He turns your head, angling in back and to the side, as his lips collide with yours. His kisses are as sloppy as his moves, desperate for more of you than there is. Your grip tightens and you feel him groan into your mouth at the feeling. That does it, a harsh flinch as you cum around his fingers. Both of you are moaning at this point, unable to break the kiss. You’re not sure which voice is yours anymore as it echoes through your head. But as he removes his fingers, you break the kiss, taking a deep breath as you rest your head against his shoulder again. You hear as he brings the drenched fingers to his mouth, wanting to get every last bit of you as possible. But it only lasts so long, as he removes them with a quiet, “Ew, these things taste bad.” After a pause, he scrambles to clarify himself, “Not you! The tattoos! They taste bad, not you.”
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siasthoughts · 6 months ago
Note
can i request for mortefi x f!reader relationship fluff hcs?
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💌 → « CRIMSON SCALES. »
CONCEPT; HEADCANONS . HOW IS MORTEFI LIKE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU?
TOPICS/WARNINGS; NONE
sorry if this is kinda bad 🥲 this my first time doing headcanons
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ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who dedicates himself to work, and he usually dismisses your texts or attempts to talk with him during work hours. but know that as soon as he gets home, or off-duty, you're all his, and he's all yours.
he's greeted by you as he walks in the door, giving you a small forehead kiss. "oh how lucky i am to be greeted by an angel, what are we having for tonight?" he asks, setting down his things onto the couch as he savors the view of you.
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who would usually come home exhausted, but if you ever needed to rest instead, he'd be happy to cook, clean, and so on.
he'd come home to see you plopped down on the couch, tired as you were barely awake, laying on your sides. he'd lean over to you, giving you a light peck on the cheek before heading to the kitchen to cook you both dinner.
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who would not be scared to give you logical advice, even if it would sting a bit.
you found comfort in his arms as you ranted about some problem you encountered with an ex-friend. "well, sweetheart, i think you should just confront them and admit your mistakes."
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who would spoil you with compliments, and acts of service. though if you wanted, he would spoil you materially too.
you'd be struggling to tie the back of your dress as you were getting ready to go out with him, before feeling a warm hand on your lower back, "you need help with this, my beautiful lady? or do you need a new dress for this stunning body?"
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who would try his best to comfort and help you when you're in stress.
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who would try to act okay even if he's exhausted to not get you to worry (you'd end up knowing anyway.)
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who has a soft spot for you.
ᡣ𐭩 MORTEFI who is willing to shift his (very sacred) routine for you.
-`♡´-
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sia's note: i really dislike the way i laid this out im so sorry 😭🙏 lowk i wna delete this the more i look at it omg
you have reached the end of this post
⌂ HOME?
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buttonmillipede · 5 months ago
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‼️RANT‼️
TW: porn, sa, rape, pedo, this is a commentary.
Im so tired of the Bsd fandom. Like i like it sometimes, i won’t deny that, but there is too much porn 😭😭.
I want family fond, fluff, anything! I want teen reader who acts too much like a bsd character when they were their age. I want a teen reader in the beast au whos dazai right hand like how dazai was moris right hand. I want dad/mom bsd parent. I want teen reader taking the place as the new demon prodigy, i want intelligent reader. I want child of chuuya or dazai meeting someone who is just like chuuya or dazai. (Idk how to explain well but here you go. Ex: Child of chuuya meets someone who acts just like dazai when chuuya met dazai, or child of dazai gets body slammed by someone who acts like chuuya). I want a sassy child reader. I WANT PLOT. PLEASE IM BEGGING, IM SO BORED OF JUST READING PORN AFTER PORN CAUSE THERES NOTHING ELSE. ITS SO DRY IN HERE. IF YOUR GONNA MAKE PORN, MAKE IT INTERESTING. I DON’T WANT TO SEE DADDY DAZAI, THAT MAN IS NOT A DADDY, HES A MANIPULATIVE TWINK. At this point its not even nice to read it. I can just hear my pussy shrivel up and die every time i stumble across smut or lemon or whatever people call it nowadays. Also side note non-con, pedo shit, etc is way to normalized in this fandom.
Edit: i just want to add im not against porn, do whatever you want i can’t control you. What im so upset about is the fact its only porn. I can’t find a x reader (Platonic or Romantic) without it being anime characters raw dogging it. I just want more variety.
Edit 2: I’m being overdramatic as a joke. I don’t like complaining without adding things that will make me laugh, sorry I didn’t make that clear. If you don’t agree with my opinion scroll away, this wasn’t made to start any fights. This is just mindless ranting about what bugged me at the moment. Please don’t give me solutions or try to treat me like a I’m stupid. I already know what solutions to take, and I’m already taking them. I also want to add again: I DON’T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH PORN. DO NOT DEBATE WITH ME ABOUT IT.
Edit: Ya’ll are porn addicts. This is a commentary, its my opinion. Mindless rambling. But the way im seeing people get straight up attacked for saying it’s weird how much porn there is, especially since most of the topics are not okay. Im lucky to have only a few try to fight me. And I want to add, Im not talking about consenting adults. Im talking about yandere (Yandere is debatable, if it’s executed well), rape, sa, pedo. I find it disgusting. I understand if you’re using it as a tool for comfort but understand that is not healthy. My conclusion is, porn, no matter what form it is, is just as addictive, and If you find something you don’t like scroll, if you keep getting that something then block, if you see something not okay then report, block, then scroll.
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rowretro · 5 months ago
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𝕭𝖑𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖉 𝕱𝖑𝖔𝖜𝖊𝖗
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Warnings: mentions of blood, angst
✧CHAPTER 1✧
✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧♡✧
It's just a harmless crush. Babe Yang's massive crush on Park Jongseong of course. It's pretty much old news, everyone knows about her crush on him, except Jay himself of course. Babe is known for being sweet to everyone, always sharing her sweets and snacks with anyone, and just genuinely being nice.
Everyone knows her best friend is Lee Aram, and she puts all her trust in the girl, it's no surprise that they see her drop Aram off, and treat her at random restaurants, as if they were dating. She's such a sweetheart.
So why didn't Jay notice her? Why didn't he love her? Who could possible reject the sweet charms of Babe?
"I don't get it- How is he not getting the hint?" Babe huffed in annoyance, a small pout adorning her glossy lips. Aram smiled sweetly t her as she pat her head "Maybe he might not be interrested?" She suggested as Babe frowned more.
"Not interrested? then why would he accept my gifts and be really nice to me? why would he still engage in conversations with me and why would he say I have W rizz? no one has ever said that to me except from my ex crush." She said As Aram sighed. "Well I don't know... You've been trying him for over a year now- aren't you tired?" She asked as Babe aired her lips.
"No I love that boy with all my heart Aram... you know this, no matter what Ill never give up, I have a good feeling about this!" She said as she walked off, seeing Jay. Aram watched as she happily walked along side Jay.
She felt as if she was watching a video of the people boarding the titanic, she knew what they were getting themselves into but they didn't know. It annoyed her how Jay was still being friendly to Babe.
. . .
Babe smiled as she walked alongside Jay to class "God your handwriting's so uneat how could you even read that?" she asked frowning as she tried to ready the messy notes "Here let me write-" she said as she neatly wrote down the small paragraph he wanted. Jay smiled as He read it out loud, clearly.
Sunghoon sat in the far corner, smiling at Aram who glanced at her a little. The male had developed a small crush on her... he doesn't know why or how. Perhaps from the time they were paired together to work on a science project?
He was rather observant. He watched how she stared at Babe and Jay, she seemed like such a supportive best friend to her. Of course. Everyone knew they were practically inseparable. He couldn't help but smile at the girl's actions.
As the teacher walked in, the class went silent. The students opened their exercise books all ready to take notes. Which Sunghoon was practically already doing, whilst admiring Aram. The way she pushes her hair back when she lowers her head to write, was a sight he loves. Its the only thing he could see from back there.
. . .
"Wow I never knew the scary quiet guy he beat the shit out of Cheung would be this shy to talk to his crush!" Babe exclaimed as Sunghoon glared at her. "I-I- sorry... I'll help you... just wait here- Im gonna try and ask Jay out.... he's usually alone in this classroom afterschool time" she said with a smile.
Yet she froze at the entrance. A sight for sore eyes. Her heart felt as if a monster was chewing on it, ripping it to pieces. Lee Aram, her best, most trusted friend was Kissing Jay. "What are you going to do about babe?" she asked with a pout as Jay scoffed.  
"Just tell that bitch already Aram... She's so fucking annoying it pisses me off, if you don't tell her I will." Jay spat as Aram snickerred. Fuck that fucking hurt. Sunghoon tried to pull her back, despite feeling hurt, himself. His own brother dating his crush?
That's fucking brutal. But it didn't hurt too much, after all its a small crush nothing more, Sunghoon has money, a nice house, a strong mafia business, why would he need a pretty girl to share that all with?
He was too focused on consoling himself he almost forgot the real problem at hand "You could've told me Aram. So much for being fucking friends. I would've backed off, and You... you could've told me you aren't interested but no, you spent over a year leading me on?!" Y/n yelled catching the 2 off guard.
"I- Y/n... Y/n wait-" "No Aram just shut the fuck up. We're done. I don't want to see your fucking face ever again... you don't know what girl code is?! even then, you could've fucking told me- i would've moved on happily."  with that, y/n ran off, Sunghoon following somewhat behind.
As the girl reached an alley way that was pretty far from the school, she paused, her head ringing, tears falling, as she coughed. But it wasn't a normal cough.... she coughed up blood, and a white flower petal. 
What the fuck? a fucking flower petal? she frowned, assuming it was probably from one of those times she got hungry and took a bite out a flower in the vase, not too bothered, she ran home, her heart broken.
Sunghoon stopped running, not wanting to upset her further, hopefully she'll come to school he can comfort her then right?... Wait why the fuck would he want to do that, he mentally slapped himself, he's never taken interest in any other girl, or any human being in general, with a sigh, he walked to his car, an inch of him worrying for the small girl...
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coleskingdom · 10 months ago
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The Only Thing I Wanted
The Continuation of Nights Like These
Pairing Will Ospreay x F Reader
Genre: Smut
Warnings NSFW Under 18 DNI
Using @madhatterbri and @midwestmade29 phone call to your ex prompt
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Now that the idea was in my head curiosity was going to get the better of me. Would he answer, and what would he say if he did.
I hit the button on my phone, I half expected to the number not to work. “Hello” a rough sleepy Essex accent answered, “My sweet girl, are you okay?” I almost hung up. “Say something please” a hint of worry in his voice.
“I hate you” was the first words that came out of my mouth. His laughing “What did I do now?”
. “You just cost me my relationship?” I spat
“How did I do that exactly? I’m quite curious considering, we haven’t spoken since I’ve been here. You won’t even look at me for more than a second so Sweetheart do tell me how exactly I ruined your relationship.”
“You ruined me, I’ve tried to move on so many times,and no matter how good it is, how much I want to be in love, you still creep in the back in.”
There was a silence, and I thought he had hung up. "Where are you?" I didn’t answer “Damn it where are you, if you don’t think that I won’t call the Cowboy and ask where he left you. You’d be wrong. So make this easy on both of us.”
“I’m at home”, knowing that the show tonight was in my hometown and that he’d have already be here.
“I’ll be there in half an hour." he said and hanging up.
What the hell is happening? He’s coming here, fuck, no that’s not what I wanted. Why am I lying to myself, of course that’s what I wanted. I knew I looked like a mess, my hair up in a bun, I was wearing an old t shirt and pajama pants, just as I contemplated going to change there was a knock at the door.
I opened it to see a bed headed Will in front of me, in his grey sweatshirt and joggers. He walked in the living room, “ Come here Sweetheart .”his arms opened wide. I moved cautiously towards him, his arms wrapped around me, his embrace so strong as he pulled me close. His chin resting on top of my head. I started to cry into his chest feeling guilty for how right this felt. “It’s okay, it’s okay, I’m such a shit.” His hands rubbing up and down my back. “It was all my fault, I can’t even remember all the ways I fucked up. I didn’t deserve you.” Reality came crashing over me, “ You can’t be here, I’m not going to be the other woman.” I pushed him away. “Who are you talking about? I’m not with anyone , the last relationship ended six months ago.” I looked up into those blue eyes trying to read them, I could always read him. “ you just seemed so happy and I assumed you were in love.”
He bent his head down and kissed me, in away he’d never kissed me before. Softly, then hungrily , then gentle, and then with an out of this world passion. His hands hold me to him, his hands pressing my hips to his, his body moving with the kiss. He moves his hands to my face gently pulling away from the kiss. His thumbs grazing over my cheeks, “Im so sorry love, I’ve worked everyday to become a man, a man that you’d be proud of, a man that I thought would be deserving of you. I saw you with him, and I knew I wouldn’t do anything because I never wanted to hurt you ever again.” Tears fell from my eyes, my lips quivering, I was so tired of running from my feelings about him.“ Will” I didn’t know what I was asking for or what I needed in that moment. He pulled me back in to his chest. “I’ve got you, whatever I have is already yours.” he whispered softly. “ I need you.” I mumbled into his chest.
He picked me up so quickly I barely had time wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his hips my head buried in his neck. As he navigated himself through the living room to my bedroom. He set me down beside the bed, then lifting his sweatshirt over his head. I sucked in a breath, his more muscular frame was new, the tattoo on his arm was new, looking at his face the smug smirk was not new. He knew he had me. “ You said you needed me, what do you need? Do you need me to hold you, do you need me to make love to you slow and passionate, do you need me to fuck you so the only name you’ll ever say again is mine, or do you need us?” The last four words sent a wave of heat through my body . “ I need us” at my words he draws a breath in deep so primal, that my body is already anticipating his next move.
He reaches for the hem of my shirt and raises it up over my head, his hands ghosting my body. Looking at him, my body hasn’t improved in the way his has, I’m a little softer, less toned than the last time we were together and I’m suddenly self conscious. “Where’d you go? his voice genuinely concerned. “I’m um..you are just so damn perfect and I’m not.” He doesn’t hesitate “You have no idea how many times I've wished I was the man touching you." His hand takes a tour of my curves as he talks. "The man palming these pretty tits. The man with his head between these thighs making you scream. “As he takes off my pajama pants. “The man filling up this tight little pussy every night. You don’t get to hide from me.”
He kisses me and I had forgotten how good he kissed, I had forgotten how his dirty mouth caused my whole body to blush . I had forgotten how right this felt.
“Go lay down on the bed” his tone wavering between an ask and an order. I lay down on the bed, he joins me there, his naked body over mine as he kisses me again on my mouth then his attention lands on my breasts. He kisses around my nipple, licking and sucking the tender skin around my peaked bud but not putting his mouth on the part of my breast that wants him most.Teasing me, and enjoying it by the mischief in his eyes, he repeats the same movements on my other breast.My back arches when he starts to kiss down my stomach, his fingertips light as they also rake down my body. His palms reach the inside of my thighs. “Open your legs for me sweet girl” as his hands push open my thighs “That’s my girl, keep them open wide for me.You’re doing so good for me, so wet for me already. I think your body has missed me.” A jolt running through me as his fingers lightly tease my folds. His mouth seals against me, my body had missed him, the way his tongue moved inside me, the perfect amount of teasing and pressure working against me. I gripped the sheets as he sticks a finger in, then another his mouth and fingers in this rhythm that is building me up “ Will, I’m so close." he speeds up knowing what I need reading my body so that my mind falls completely blank as the orgasm shatters through my body. his fingers continue to work me through the waves licking and sucking as it subsided. He moves back
He’s back over me, he kisses me I can taste myself on his lips. His eyes are soft almost sad, but there’s a desire there. “What is it Will?” Gently rubbing the back of his neck, “You can tell me anything.” His eyes reading my face “ I’m probably going to fuck up what I’m trying to say to you. It’s always been you for me. Nothing in my life compares to this …..to us .” His voice cracking his vulnerability breaking my will not to say the words in my throat. “I love you Will, I always have, and I never stopped.”
He kisses me again deeply as the tips of his fingers move slick between my legs, and then the, thick tip of him is there, nestled right at my entrance. He kisses me as he pushes his cock inside each of us swallowing the other’s moans. as I squeeze his hips between my thighs and pull him in the rest of the way. Inch by inch we connect. He's warm and silky inside me, filling me up completely, and it couldn't feel more perfect. He’s on top of me, pinning me down and driving into me, taking control, claiming me. I kiss his neck, licking the salt from his skin and dig my nails into his back as his thrusts become more frenzied. He hits the spot inside me that makes everything tingle and throb and I instinctively bear down against him as he keeps pumping. He changes his position bringing me with him, sliding in deeper every movement building pressure, his hand reaches down rubbing my clit coaxing my body, teasing and playing , as if we’d never been apart. I could feel my orgasm building though it felt bigger than before, a feeling that had only been with him. “Will, I’m so” I feel his cock twitch in side of me, as my release flows down his cock. “That’s my sweet girl make a mess” through gritted teeth, my pussy continues to flutter around him, he pumps into me one more time, his release coming with a roar, and deep inside me.” He collapses on top of me, his head buried in my chest , my arms wrapped around him protectively. “ You were amazing love,” he said, “ I’m so …” he cut me off immediately” if you say anything besides happy, satisfied , hungry. I’m going to have to go back to work, until you’re so love drunk you can’t say anything but my name. “ a grin pulling at his lips. “I’m so glad you came over.”
Rolling off of me and pulling me to him, his breathing a calming presence as his fingers play in my hair. He glances at the clock, “Happy Valentines, My Sweet Girl”were the last words I heard as I drifted off in his arms.
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thyluvcupix · 1 year ago
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Sakuatsu fic recs!
im very picky on what i label to be a 'good fic' most of the ones are amazing but only a few will get bookmarkerd by me and here they are! My ao3 acc that has many more book marks mostly nsfw i diddnt put here
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A liar's truth 49k words
okay this one is just breathtaking? if you havent read this pls do i cried sm😭
summary:
In which Sakusa Kiyoomi is raised to believe that gay people go to hell but then takes one look at Miya Atsumu and thinks, then why the hell did God make them so fucking hot?
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I'll see you in court, motherfucker 2k words
its short and funny def worth a read if you wanna giggle
Summary:
“You’re still a fraud. You’re—you’re a scammer, is what you are. I don’t know how you convinced the hospital administration that you’re my husband, or that we even have a relationship, but I have—” Fuck, what’s the word? “Lawyers,” Kiyoomi says triumphantly, “I have lawyers, and if you’re trying to con me for some ulterior motive, I’ll have you know—” “Oh my god, Omi,” Miya says, sounding equal parts exasperated and horribly fond. “How can you be so cute?”
A pleasant side effect of being down one vestigial organ is forgetting the existence of your hot Olympic athlete husband
3
The 28 post cards you left me 8k words
Honestly, if i ever break up with someone this is exactly what i want from them? Like omg?? pls send me post cards, Super cute
Summary:
Atsumu takes texting your ex to a new level by sending Sakusa postcards in Animal Crossing instead.
4
The art of the thrist trap 4k words
naughty naughty, but other than that this fic is so funny? like ask ur brother how to rizz someone up
Summary:
“Samu, I’ve got a big problem.”
“Here we fuckin’ go. What is it this time?”
Atsumu needs to think strategically about how he’s going to phrase this. One wrong word and Osamu will hang up on him and Atsumu will be forced to wade through the hell of his own mind by himself.
“I jerked off to one of my teammates.”
Osamu hangs up.
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Problem 5k words
super cute sleepy omi is something else
Summary:
Atsumu has a problem— somehow, he finds every version of Sakusa Kiyoomi adorable.
In which Atsumu realizes that Sakusa Kiyoomi gets very quiet and very adorable when he's tired. Things simply go downhill from there.
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Take me where the music aint to loud 2k words
Protetive sakusa>>
Summary:
Winning against the Adlers must have meant something of a great deal to Sakusa, as usually he wouldn’t even consider going out with the rest of his team after the game.
Yet, here he is, in a somewhat crowded club, wearing a black button up shirt rolled up around his wrists and sweating a little under the bright lights.
Atsumu thinks he looks beautiful.
He wanders over to where Sakusa is standing with Meian, hoping that tonight, with a little bit of influence from alcohol, he might be able to get more conversation out of him than he can usually get outside of practice.
But of course, Atsumu can’t have anything good, ever. Because, blocking the way is his ex-boyfriend.
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or; atsumu runs into his ex in the club, and sakusa has to rescue him
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ROAD RAGE 2k words
This is funny on so many levels poor atsumu he fears for his life
Summary:
For a man who preaches at any given opportunity about the importance of good self-care practices, Sakusa certainly displays an astounding lack of self-preservation when behind the wheel.
Sakusa Kiyoomi has a driver’s license. Sakusa Kiyoomi cannot drive.
The two are not mutually exclusive.
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The ascent to love (or descent) 3k words
Im always a sucker for hurt/comfort and this fic gives me that, its also funny as well so its a win-win type thing
Summary:
Stuck in an elevator with his boyfriend after a fight, Sakusa Kiyoomi couldn't think of anything worse. Working through their issues?  Maybe he could think of one thing.
9
Take me home 10k words
i just cannont stress how good this is, like its soul healing on so may levels gosh
Summary:
Turns out, Miya Atsumu never did a good thing in his life – his love was one-sided. And so, he was running away, hoping to meet some friendly people, take a bunch of pretty pictures and get over Kita Shinsuke.
In which Miya Atsumu is an exchange student in Italy, and Sakusa Kiyoomi is the only one knowing Japanese, forced to take care of the new student.
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Hope is the thing with feathers 10k words
Two dummies taking care of some birds is honestly to good
Summary:
Kiyoomi wakes to Miya banging on his door, yelling words that put the fear of god in him.
“Omi-kun, get out here, we’re gonna be fathers.”
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In the stars 1k words
In all honesty it made me think of the other side of love i never thought about
Summary:
Miya Atsumu is a romantic. He always had been. He believes in soulmates and destiny and true love in the stars. Sakusa Kiyoomi believes none of that.
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My ao3↵
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