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Dan and Phil's TIT tour × Troye Sivan on SWEAT tour
2024, year of youtube twinks simulating gay sex on stage
bonus:


#photos not mine#this is a joke#but also not because why am i spending my hard earned cash to watch these men have sex on stage being an adult is so funny#also if someone wants to make a sister daniel one of ur girls edit plssss im begging u (or link if its already been done)#phan#dnp#tit spoilers#titspoilers#tit tour#dan and phil#terrible influence tour#dont want to put this in troye's tag or sweat tour tag tbh lol#amazingphil#daniel howell#phil lester
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in conjunction with this [ post ] please read i want to hold aono-kun so badly i could die!
#aceyuu#twisted wonderland#ace trappola#ace trappola x yuu#twst#disney twst#twst ace#deuce spade#twst deuce#minor azul mention but im not gonna tag it LOL#my art#aono kun ni sawaritai kara shinitai#pupheart#octopup#2025#this is all so scribbly and not goodsrryyyyy but i needed to redraw this soo bad like. its so ace. its SO ace.#you can replace azuls name with anyone else i just threw him in cuz my yuu is defaulted to azul sorry.#i need to see ace sooo terribly insecure like all the time idk. i like it when hes upset LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#maybe its cuz hes a bastard <- cares abt him with all my heart)#also im a big unrequited love ace x yuu advocate. its so delicious when he gets jealous and upset abt yuu dating someone technically 'bette#than him' . he is not immune to it. i loveeee it so bad. anyway aceyuu 5ever
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wxs and n25 have really interesting story and dynamic parallels but no one seems to talk about it since its 1/2 3/4 and that means no yaoi
1 who gets too into their work -- to the detriment of their health -- and attaches their value to how close they are to their ultimate goal in life (which truly began because of an ailing family member) who for one reason or another takes it upon themselves to "save" something deeply important to 2's well-being and sense of self, something they are in danger of losing due to a struggle with their family.
3 who struggles with confidence in their main talent/passion and feels like they're stuck because of preexisting insecurity made worse by events we see only in flashback and how they're being supported by 4 who has issues trying to move on from the past and step into the future + fights w the existential dread of how their fun will end one day but is actually the first to try and break apart from the rest..
#like obviously they're not the Same characters that'd just be some sadkasa shit but there's connections between the two groups#and at least with emu/mafuyu & rui/mizuki that is expanded upon in game with Their interactions.#(iirc tsukasa/kanade & nene/ena dont have the same level of ints but correct me if im wrong bc i know theyve had events together!)#project sekai#prsk#pjsekai#pjsk#wonderlands x showtime#wxs#wansho#nightcord at 25:00#25 ji nightcord de#niigo#n25#tsukasa tenma#kanade yoisaki#emu otori#mafuyu asahina#nene kusanagi#ena shinonome#rui kamishiro#mizuki akiyama#technically i could tag this as the 1/2 3/4 ships but i dont wanna when im just repeating base character info lol#sadkasas did terrible damage to the fandom bc i feel like im gonna be called a little crazy for this when#im just sharing info supported by the game esp w how much they do advertise w each units number members together#(like the 2s have some movie promos ive seen + each anthology has all the characters of the same slot)#and the 1s are Very important to game advertising
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guy who wants to be a hater so bad but his conscience keeps beating him up
(links: original cat image & edited cat image)
#crime and punishment#rodion#sketch#traditional stuff#i snatch people's text posts and make terrible doodles#oooooohhhhh you wanna hug your sister sooooooo baaaaaadddd oooooh#you wanna hug her soooo bad you piece of shit. rodion romanovich when i fucking get yooooooouuuuuuuuu#yes i am recycling that gag i did with hajime before#trivia time: when i made that post i intended the tik tok comments to be his inner monologue#but it appears everyone took them to be his classmates' reaction#which surprised me a little bit! it didn't even occur to me lol. even though it does make a lot of sense#ok! that's all the trivia for this week#anyway im gonna put those sketches i put the cat image over in a different post as well. reached the mobile limit#hm i dont think ill draw more of her. certainly not enough to warrant a tag? but thats polenka with him on the stairs
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GORGEOUS art from @harbingersecho for my new fic for @zukkabigbang2024!
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[Image ID: A close-up painting of Sokka and Zuko sitting on a bench in a park at night. Sokka is holding a smoking cigarette and Zuko is holding a beer. They're looking at each other and smiling. /. End ID]
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how it feels to have a heartbeat
He lit a cigarette with his fingertip and took a drag, leaning hard against the pillar behind him, sliding down into a squat, glad the sidewalk was mostly empty. He sat like that for a while, lost in thought, just appreciating the silence, until he felt a tap on his shoulder. He twisted around and looked up at the man standing there. “Sorry to bother you. You wouldn’t have a lighter by any chance, would you?” the man said. Zuko stood up, turning to face the man fully. He felt suddenly lightheaded from standing too abruptly and reached out to steady himself against the concrete beside him, managing to reach out a flame-tipped finger with his other hand. “Thanks,” the man said, leaning in slightly to light the tip of his cigarette, eyes locked with Zuko’s the whole time. Zuko stared dumbly. He’d never seen anyone before who looked quite like this guy. He wouldn’t have taken him as a local, yet his accent told Zuko that he likely was. He had the clearest blue eyes Zuko had ever seen. He could hardly look away. “I, uh…”
Modern meets meet cute meets magical realism in a love letter to Taipei told by Zukka.
#i am SO happy its here this has been my baby!!!!!#LOOK AT THIS GORGEOUS ART I AM BEYOND HAPPY!!!!#zukka big bang 2024#zukka#fanfic#hifthah#im super excited to hear feedback and work on the final two chapters#mine#fanart#which is not mine lol#atla#these tags are all over the place im sorry its been a terrible fibro day#greatest hits#100
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moe nova... 🔥
#metal cardbot#flame nova#should i even tag it tho#metal cardbot spoilers#doodle#im still drawing. slowly and as much as i can cram into weekends. btu its stuff i cant post cuz im tryin to make things gjdfkl#but for now take this....thing#mutuals said world is mine flamenova and now im getting ideas. terrible little ideas.#i miss being unemployed and able to draw#yes i know they look too much like bishoujo stuartscream#I WANNA ADD its for the moe nova jokes. i would never consider generic animu creatures as my go-to human designs....disclaimer lol#ive gotten lovely fanart of em already though which makes me so happy lmao
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POST-CANON TACO HEADCANON WOOOO
I think that if she and Mepad were to start living in the hotel (sharing a room) she would hoard food. Please hear me out. The food sources we know of on the island include:
•what is inside the hotel
•mephone himself
•a few orange, apple(?) and lemon trees
•where ever she gets her tea, I suppose? (But I drink liters of tea per day, and I'm still hungry, so.)
So! I'm gonna make the educated guess that Taco didn't usually have enough to eat. Her food sources are inconsistent at best and nonexistant at worst. And this is while she was homeless in the forest for *years*!! So I think she'd start secretly hoarding food in her and Mepad's room. Just in case. Anyways, Mepad would eventually find out about this because, well, he lives in that room. And being the KING and ICON and GENTLEMAN Mepad is, he would get her a little mini fridge so she could have her food in a place where it wouldn't go bad but she could still keep it close and safe and have her just-in-case supply.
#taco ii#ii taco#mepad ii#ii mepad#tacopad#sourscreen#if youd like#this can be platonic or romantic#i love them either way#ii headcanons#ii headcanon#im so serious everyone please join me in thinking about how homeless and isolation would continue to impact taco post-canon#because i have so many thoughts about it#maybe ill actually post them lol#i want a fic about this#but im terrible at writing#and by that i mostly mean like the act of actually writing#these tags are too long lmao
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call that an intergenerational language barrier 🙅
#my arts#my sketchy wip arts#back to the future#bttf#marty mcfly#doc brown#emmett brown#michael j fox#christopher lloyd#I GUESS ?????#i forgot how much i love drawing baby marty :]#also -- local old man doesnt “get” the youths pt2/???#he is just so happy to have a silly little friend uwu#my art program is acting up so thats why i had to use mspaint WITH MY FINGER BOOOOOO#so yeah sorry its so messy i couldnt really do a proper sketch layer :///#just had to stack things on top of each other and veeeery carefully erase overlap lol. i hope it still looks okay ;w;#btw thank u madscientists1mp for telling me abt christopher lloyds birthday <3 (despite the fact i was late... story of my life >_>;)#ALSO!! everyone so nice the other day in the tags oTL ILY ALL its very nice to draw again QwQ even if its like no effort doodles but yknow~#also also also this is literally such a terrible time to post art but idc thats future (ha) cherrys problem. im going to bed BYEEE
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Hi gang
#ace and luffy#monkey d. luffy#one piece#portgas d ace#asl brothers#just al brothers here tho ig#fanart#my art#one piece fanart#one piece edit#guys im terrible at tags#on all platforms#but tagging on Tumblr is fun#lol
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For the wip ask game:
We've Been Trying to Reach You About Your Magic Sheikah Weapon's Extended Warranty
& You're taller, how fucking dare you? 🤭
Lmao I knew those two would interest someone. They're currently both ficlets, bc I can't seem to get them over 1k.
'you're taller how fucking dare you' started as a literal joke I sent to a friend in early December last year. The premise is that Wind was in Hyrule Warriors pre-LU (he would've been 12-ish, so between Wind Waker and Phantom Hourglass). Time - then Mask - would be like 11 and Wars would've been 16-18. Then cut to the start of Linked Universe. Can you just imagine how mad Wind must've been to see Time not only now older than him, but older than him by like 15 years? He must've been furious.
“Warriors!” A new voice calls. They both turn to see a man, older than the Captain with shiny plate armour and interesting tattoos on one side of his face that Link can't quite make out from a distance, striding towards them. “Oh boy.” The Captain – Warriors, Link guesses, though that’s a pretty shit name if it’s really what he’s going by – mumbles under his breath, then waves the man. “Over here, Time. I found him.” Time’s face brightens – who’s picking these names they’re horrible – as he smiles, stopping beside them. He looks at Link and his smile turns smug. “Tune! I told you I was going to be taller than you.” What? Link’s nose scrunches up. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Warriors smacks a hand to his forehead with a near-silent groan, but says nothing. Link peers up at Time's face. Shit those tattoos are very vivid. And familiar. Why… does he recognise them? Wait. Wait. Link splutters and points an accusing finger at Time, furious. “Mask?! When did you get old?! WHEN DID YOU GET THAT TALL?!”
As for We've Been Trying to Reach You About Your Magic Sheikah Weapon's Extended Warranty, I recently learnt that you can rematch Maz Koshia in BOTW! So naturally all I could think about is how much Four would absolutely hate the One-Hit Obliterator with his entire body and soul.
The whole thing is silly and I think I started writing it at like midnight or something bc I cannot for the life of me remember how I wanted it to end. This is literally all I've written for it lmao.
Things had been looking bad right up until Wild, who looks as though he’s on the literal brink of death, bursts into the room and smacks the monster with a strange, glowing pronged weapon. It crumples under the hit and explodes into purple smoke. “What.” Wind says flatly. Wild wobbles violently to one side but manages to catch himself against a wall, breathing heavily. Twilight squints at him through the bars of his cell, then squints harder – this time at the weapon. “Wait, is that—” “Yep!” Wild answers with entirely too much cheer for someone who looks inches away from dropping dead. He pushes himself upright and staggers towards them, pulling a ring of keys from the Sheikah Slate. “How the fuck did you convince him to give you that?!” The emotion in Twilight’s voice might be described as ‘awed’, if awed could be served alongside a liberal dose of bone-deep exasperation. “Turns out Maz Koshia’s still around, for some Hylia-damned reason.” Wild explains brightly. He fumbles with the lock three times before Four snatches the keys from his hands. “Thanks, I cannot see straight right now, like at all.” He seems oddly baffled by the round of concerned noises that echo across the dungeon, but shrugs it all off and continues describing his latest bad decision without any remorse. “Anyway, yeah, he’s still around and apparently ‘an evil being resurrecting and strengthening monsters beyond what is normal’ is a decent reason to loan it out to kill said evil being. Conditionally, of course.” Time, heaving a sigh, looks reluctant to ask yet can’t stop himself from doing so. “Conditions such as?” “I don’t die, naturally, and also beat him in another fight later.” Wild nearly pitches face-first into the ground, utterly undermining his triumphant tone, but instead collapses onto Sky, who looks world-weary in a way he rarely is. He slings one of Wild’s arms around his shoulders, practically holding the Champion upright. Four, hucking the keys to Warriors, almost vibrates as he eyes up the weird mutant trident-looking weapon Wild’s still holding onto. It glows faintly and thrums loudly with energy. “What is that?!” “This,” Wild flips the weapon with a grin – and really, given how horrible he looks, Four is actually mad at how easily he pulls that action off – “is the One-Hit Obliterator. No, I have no idea why the Sheikah monks made it, don’t ask. But! This thing is stupidly powerful, hence why I had to make a deal to use it.” “One-Hit Obliterator?” Four stares at it and mentally screams.
#linked universe#riddel's fics#the top one's honestly nearly done im just not 100% happy with the way i've written wind which means more rewrites#i genuinely dont know if i'll ever finish the bottom one#bc it requires so much worldbuilding for all the weird things the Sheikah monks made for no reason whatsoever#why does the one-hit obliterator exist? why does the master cycle zero exist? who knows definitely not the Sheikah monks#and also writing four is hard :((((#but i just know he'd hate the obliterator INTENSELY#im terrible at picking small parts of fics to show as snippets#so you're getting a chunk of them lol sorry#tag game#answers#content warning language#bc its me
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ok 1 more oliver day thing. i thought this joke would be kinda funny
#my art lol#vocaloid#oliver vocaloid#flower vocaloid#fukase vocaloid#utatane piko#ok this one's just silly so idk if it needs more tags#'flower and fukase are terrible at giving gifts' is a a misconception. oliver; who asks for the weirdest shit for his bday-#jkjk. but then again my oliver is just a gremlin so he would be ecstatic about getting a chainsaw and a tarantula (to eat) for his bday LMA#not that he'll say no to that big squishy bird plush he's prob excited abt that too. but he is feral gremlin at heart... akjshgkj jk#but also WAOW YEAH. its so funny they let him age exactly one (1) year with his maghni ai release lmfao. forever 13 now?#13 is a funnier number lowkey given the like. spooky ooh unlucky number connotations. but wack tho 13 YEARS SINCE 2011?#im still on the fence abt his maghni ai voice tbh but maybe if there's more demos i'll see... really curious abt the multilingual modes#also yes bc i have a terrible sense of humor the spider-eating jokes will never get old to me. im sorry. idc if its overused its funny
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peeps who have gone to tit alone: did you have a good time? was it chill and fun or weird and awkward?
sincerely i’m autistic and socially anxious but want to go to tit la by myself bc i don’t have anyone to go with lmao
pls use the replies or send me an ask! <33
#i finally got paid so i can afford the ticket#and im rationalizing it bc it was my birthday recently and shit’s been hard lately#i dont want it to be awk tho lol#so like. help a guy out pls <3#ott.txt#tags for reach ->#dnp#dan and phil#dnptit#terrible influence tour#tit la#dan howell#phil lester#amazingphil#phan
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DANIEL ON TWITTER HES ALIVE
#peep the 3am time tag lol im trying to go to sleep but i got a dan howell twitter notif sooo#dip and pip#dan and phil#phan#phil lester#daniel howell#danisnotonfire#amazingphil#dan howell#dan and phil games#tit tour#terrible influence
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holy shit bro I need to read all of figure 8 right know cause it figure ATE
LMAO I'm dying this is actually amazing just for that imma post the first chapter tonight HAHAHHAHA
#🌧 raindrops#arcane#ive got a 4 hr drive up to a friends Tahoe house first but !!! ch1 will go up later tonight#i cannot promise the taglist will work cause. im terrible at those but#i will try my best#♾️ figure eights#thatll be my tag for this series and updates!!! if you wanna either follow or block lol
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CW: child whumper (sidekick), mentions of previous abuse. (If you find any more CWs I’ve missed, please tell me!)
Villain was feeling great. Todays plan had gone perfectly and now hero’s own sidekick was tied to a chair in front of them. Poor sidekick probably had no idea where they were, Villain smirked.
‘I bet your praying hero is going to show up and save you. I assure you they won’t. They don’t even know where my lair is; besides, do you really think they’ll go through all the effort just to save their stupid little sidekick who got themselves kidnapped?’
Sidekick was shaking. Terrified. Now completely at the villains mercy, their identity was going to be revealed, they just knew it. And then it wouldn’t just be sidekick that will die, but their loved ones too. Hero has told sidekick about villain. Sidekick knew villain was a ruthless killer. Their fear mixed with their guilt for having endangering not only themselves but their friends too. Hero would be so disappointed in sidekick. Villain was right, hero would never bother to save them. It was their own fault that they had messed up and gotten themselves kidnapped.
Villain crouched down and reached out to sidekicks face-
‘Let’s see who’s under this disguise- which I must say, is rather pathetic. Could you not have come up with a better costume for yourself?’, villain joked.
-Sidekick flinched away, but villain swiftly grabbed sidekicks mask and roughly pulled it off their face.
‘I bet you’re-‘,
The villains grin dropped along with their stomach. This was not what they were expecting. Rage shook through villain. Sidekicks face showed nothing but absolute fear.
‘A child. You’re just a child’
Villains face softened as they tried to hide their anger from the kid that sat before them. Hero had sent a child to fight them. A child. How could hero do this? And who was responsible for sidekicks black eye? Villain knew it wasn’t them. Was it hero? When villain got their hands on them-
But that could be dealt with later. Villain needed to focus on the terrified face in front of them.
‘I’m not a child. I’m 15’
‘Who told you that was old? Was it hero? You can’t even drink yet, darling. You’re a child.
And to be clear, I am not going to hurt you. I know hero’s probably told you horrible lies about me, but I can assure you, they’re not true… at least most of them aren’t true. But I would never intentionally hurt a child’
Sidekick was shocked by the softness of villains voice, which was completely different from the roughness it had been filled with 2 seconds ago. It was just an act. It had to be. Sure, hero could be harsh to sidekick, but sidekick deserved it right? Hero was just training sidekick.
‘Are you hungry? Injured? Let me patch you up’
Villain gently brushed sidekicks hair out their face to get a better look at the purple bruises forming on their forehead. Sidekick flinched away from the hand, letting out a small whimper.
That was it. Villain vowed they would destroy hero next time they saw them. But first, they have got to help the poor kid.
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This was my first time writing something like this, so any feedback and help would be appreciated. In fact, it think this is the first time I’ve written a story outside an English lesson (which I haven’t done as a subject since GCSE’s) since I wrote a short Harry Potter headcanon when I was 12 lol. I still remember that headcanon tho, and I’m pretty sure it might still be on tumblr somewhere 🫡
#child sidekick#villain and child hero#villain and child sidekick#evil hero#whump writing#I am terrible at grammar feel free to point out any mistakes I made (also I sincerely apologise lol)#whump#villain x sidekick#hero x villain#caretaker#caretaker villain#idk what else to tag#idk what im doing#in case anyone was wondering the headcanon was about teddy tonks sneaking into headmistress mcginagalks office to look at memories#of his parents in the pensieve
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there will be cake.
i finally finished my first fic, and it's greenflame! it takes place between possession and skybound. i spent a few days on it and i'm still not satisfied... it still feels a bit ooc and amateur to me, but please let me know what you think. here it is...
Sitting down for dinner with the other ninja, Kai had no intention of talking about anything serious, let alone marriage, and especially not how he should go about proposing to Lloyd. But picking at his bowl of chili, he looked around to his friends, watching them talk about their day with animated expressions and exaggerated hand gestures, observing Cole and Jay arguing about every detail of their training so they could trade insults while blushing whenever anyone (mostly Zane) pointed out just how closely they'd have to be watching each other to know such minor things about their routines. And when Kai glanced over to his sister she was already glancing his way with an exasperated smirk at Cole and Jay's antics.
The only absent one was Lloyd. The Green Ninja was training late, as usual, pushing himself to his limits. The perfectionism was at first a little annoying for Kai, who tended to take any show of exertion as a competition against him, but overtime he'd learned to accommodate his boyfriend, who was typically late to dinner or outings with the rest of them. The pressure Lloyd must have felt, every single day, to not only lead the rest of them but to also make his pretty much godly ancestors proud of him had been grinding on him even more as of late, and Kai didn't want to add to their young leader's troubles. Still though… after their last battle, almost losing Lloyd to possession had made him keenly aware of how fragile the normalcy of all their lives were.
At any time, they could find themselves under attack once more. Ninajo had a reputation for attracting the most dark-hearted, vengeant, and power-hungry of villains, and Kai had to wonder if there was some kind of sign posted out for all the tyrants coming to seize this particular place. Something massive and neon was advertising how siegable and conquerable this entire land was somewhere, he was sure.
But as a ninja, bound and entangled with all the rest of his team (a fate he would never want reversed or changed in any way), he knew he would lay down his life for any one of his friends if it ever came down to it. And, naturally, he knew in his heart that no matter how much he teased or gave Lloyd trouble, he would stand behind that completely unhinged god-in-training no matter what. Wherever Lloyd led him, he would follow. And it was because of this that he knew he had to make their relationship even more official, even more sacred, so that when villains like Morro or Chen or the rest came knocking again, Kai would know there was still a chance at a normal life, even a small part of it, in their own lives. That he could say that Lloyd was his in more way than one and come back home to that small piece of stability.
Now, watching his friends continue to taunt and push each other, a warm feeling suddenly overtook Kai, not unlike the sensation he got whenever he drank a nice cup of Wu's tea. He felt it blossom inside of him, a hot and protective surge that came whenever he thought of the others, especially Lloyd. He knew he could trust them completely, he could ask anything of them and they wouldn't treat him any differently for it.
So it was without any filter that he found himself asking, "Guys, if I were to hypothetically propose to someone… someone who's very uhm… career-driven and practically all-powerful, how would I go about asking them to do something absolutely ordinary like marriage?"
A small silence briefly overtook the table as the others, except for Cole who was still digging into his plate without interest in anything else, glanced around towards each other. Nya, on Kai's left side, was completely still all of a sudden and opposite him Zane and Jay exchanged looks.
Just as the stillness was starting to become unnerving, Zane, always practical, broke in, "Logically the best way would be to—"
"Oh my gosh, you guys," Jay all but shrieked. "Kai and Lloyd are going to get married!"
"Wait what????" Kai burst out, feeling his cheeks start to heat up. "I didn't say anything about—"
"Oh please," Jay scoffed, rolling his eyes. "You're the fire ninja, Kai, so whatever you're trying to cover up, you still burn holes right through it." He was picking at his bowl of chili delicately, like most of its contents offended him, and by the way he had complained about every other dish Cole had prepared for them, you would think it was genuine. But Kai knew the Blue Ninja would sneak lots of extra helpings of Cole's meals whenever he thought they weren't looking. And seeing as how most of Cole's food was… to put it plainly… bad, Kai knew it was because Jay was simply (and not so secretly) completely crazy for the Earth Master.
"You guys thought it was such a secret, but we could all tell what you were up to," Jay continued, matter of fact, then smirked. "The walls here are really thin, you know."
Kai groaned and buried his face in hands. "Okay," he sighed out. "So what if it is Lloyd?"
"I knew it!" Zane exclaimed from Cole's side, face lighting up. When the others looked to him, he explained, "Pixal told me they have a 95% compatibility rate. Lloyd's sensitivity and high emotional intelligence counterbalances Kai's hotheadedness and temper—"
"Yeah yeah we get it," Kai huffed, feeling called out.
"My vitals monitors indicate that your heart-rate speeds up whenever Lloyd appears," Zane added helpfully. "My data also suggests that Lloyd's libido increases whenever he watches you training."
Beside him, Nya made a choking sound. "Oh my god," she gasped, wiping away dribbles of water from her lips. "Please never say libido again, Zane."
Despite the embarrassment at having his secret relationship exposed so quickly, Kai couldn't help the way that information stroked his ego. All the time that little brat had been claiming to watch so closely to point out errors in Kai's form (as he always did) he was secretly checking Kai out shamelessly. It made him flush with more than a little contentment, but he got a hold of himself quickly, and managed to grit out, "Okay guys, that's enough."
"Where would they even get married though?" Jay pushed on, ignoring Kai entirely.
"Somewhere big enough for all of us," Zane pointed out. "I can compile a list of popular wedding locations and analyze them for suitability."
"No no," Jay dismissed, whipping his spoon around passionately so that a bit of chili hit Kai in the face. He wiped it off with a grimace as Jay continued to lecture Zane. "It should be somewhere perfect for the both of them..." Jay bit down on the handle of his spoon and then grinned widely at Kai. "I know just the place—my parent's junkyard!"
Kai blinked, caught off-guard. "Jay, I'm not marrying Lloyd in a junkyard—"
Across the table, Cole's face finally unfused from his plate long enough for him to shout, "Will there be cake? I'll definitely come if there's cake!"
"Always thinking with your stomach, right Cole?" Jay snarked. But the Earth Master chose to ignore him, much to Jay's disappointment.
As the others continued to conspire Lloyd and Kai's wedding, loudly describing each lavish detail — "Lloyd should wear all red so Kai can wear all green... and there should be dragons!!!" Jay contributed while Zane added, "Kai should put Lloyd in his lap and ride in on one to the ceremony" and Cole piped in, "And there should be triple stacked cake afterwards!" — Kai's ears picked up shuffled movement in the hallway. He sat up straight. Wu and Misako were out getting "vital" supplies like flavored tea and herbal medicines — old people errands — and they weren't expecting anyone else to come calling. It could only be Lloyd.
Getting that sensation he got whenever he was about to be cornered, he felt himself start to panic. "Guys, if you don't shut up now, I swear I'll send every single one of you to the Cursed Realm," Kai hissed out. "I don't even care if we're on the same team — you will all be banished for your crimes. This conversation is over."
But, of course, cause everything and everyone hated Kai, this was the exact conversation Lloyd chose just that moment to walk in on.
With a short glance around to the other ninja, he came into the room and a crushing silence followed as they all tracked him with their eyes. He walked casually, carrying a bowl laden with an excessive amount of Cole's chili (which wasn't that bad but it also wasn't that good either, so Kai felt Lloyd had filled it to the brim subconsciously) and settled down in his usual spot to the right of Kai, slowly lifting his spoon to his lips…. Lips that were twisted up in an unmistakable smirk, the one Kai knew and adored so well, that he loved to bite on — but right now, seeing the way it melted away the usual prim and proper princely beauty of Lloyd's face into the wild rawness of the conceded brat he really was, all Kai could think was Lloyd knows…. He's been listening in on the whole thing!
"What's all this about cake?" Lloyd asked, oh so innocently, as if he didn't know already, and Kai kind of wanted to manhandle him right then and there for being such an unyielding brat.
But before Kai could say or do anything to grab at any sort of control over the conversation, Jay leaned in closer to Lloyd, conspiratorially settling his chin into his cupped hand like he was about to tell the world's greatest secret. With a hauntingly straight face he said, "Only that Kai can't keep his eyes off yours."
… And then everything kind of blew up in Kai's face.
Nya and Zane burst out laughing and Cole let out a bellowing huff before slapping Jay across the back so hard the Blue Ninja's face almost landed in his uneaten bowl of chili (Kai wished with his whole heart that it really had). Jay glared briefly at Cole but then the Master of Earth said, "I guess that's why they call you the Master of Shocks! That was a good one, Jay."
Pure pride swelled the Master of Shocks' chest, making him look just like a puffed up little blue jay — which he technically was… though Kai could barely register the humor of it as sticky hot embarrassment exploded inside of him.
"Oh wow you guys," Nya finally managed to gasp as she held her sides, like she could fall apart from the delicious humiliation of it all. She wiped at her eyes, choking out, "Look at Lloyd's cheeks — they look like cherries!"
Lloyd's mouth was pressed together tightly, and his cheeks were definitely a deep scarlet that Kai took some satisfaction in seeing, but he knew his own cheeks were probably just as red and burning twice as hot.
And of course Jay would point that out. "Guys, check out Kai's face — he's burning up!"
"Oh the irony," Nya giggled.
"Red ninja indeed!" Zane chimed in with a grin that practically spilled off his face. And in that moment, Kai had never been more certain in his life that he was surrounded by traitors. Enemies.
Kai ground his teeth together and finally managed to squeeze out some sort of response. "You're all banished."
The other ninja, minus a cherry-colored Lloyd, started laughing again as Kai sat there, gripping the edge of the table and plotting revenge. Only Cole made any kind of move towards redemption, leaning closer to both Lloyd and Kai to say, "You know we're just teasing you two… We're really happy to see you making things more official. And just so you know, I would love to be there for you, even if there no's cake for me."
"You do know the whole point is so that Kai gets to keep the cake just for himself, don't you?" Jay smirked.
Before Kai could set fire to either himself or Jay, Cole turned to the Blue Ninja and smiled. "Don't worry, sparky, I'll make sure to claim a cake for myself too," he said, and proceeded to reach over so he could grope Jay's ass as the smaller ninja let out a high-pitched squeak.
"Who's the Master of Shock now?" Zane grinned as Jay started choking.
Nya pursed her lips and said, "Really? Right in front of my chili?"
Kai moaned and buried his face in his hands as the entire table descended into chaos. But it died out quickly as Lloyd stood up, his face unreadable, that silken smirk of his erased from his lips. As Kai peeked up at him, he couldn't help but feel… reverent. Lloyd was strong, and fierce, and brave. And more than that… he was the magnet that kept them gravitating to him, to their destiny. Their fates were inexplicably tied to his for the rest of their lives. They all shared a bond deeper than mere friends: they were each other's counterparts and focal points and homes.
And nobody was more at home with Lloyd than Kai.
"Kai," Lloyd began, and Kai felt the air rush out him as soon as Lloyd turned those ember-bright eyes right on his face. "Do… do you really want to marry me?"
Kai's heart was pounding far too fast. It felt like the adrenaline spark right before a battle. "Of course," he managed.
The other ninja were finally fully silent, their eyes wide and watchful. Feeling bold, Kai pushed away from the table and stood right in front of his boyfriend. Then he sank to his knees, his eyes never leaving Lloyd's, and swallowed. "You know that all of us are bound to you, and all of us would protect you with our lives, just as you would do for us. But the bond I share with you runs even deeper. I promised you that I would protect you, and that I would follow where you lead me, that you could always rely on me, so I would like to ask you now… Will you let me follow you forever? Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon, will you marry me?"
In all that time, Lloyd and Kai didn't look away from each other. The others remained blissfully quiet, but there was a current of anticipation coursing through the room.
It felt like an age before Lloyd cleared his throat and said, "Of course I will.... Someone has to keep my cake away from Cole, after all."
Kai groaned but found himself grinning anyways. "You're insufferable," he told Lloyd and pushed up from the floor.
"That only means you're even more perfect a match," Nya pointed out from Kai's side, but she hugged her brother tightly, patting him on the back. They both knew how much this meant to him...
Lloyd and Kai returned to their places at the table and tried to resume eating normally, but they kept glancing over to each other until Jay scoffed and said, "You two, honestly, go get a room."
"Quiet, sparky, you'll get yours soon," Cole winked and Jay started to protest.
"If you think I have any interest at all in a dusty piece of rock like you—"
"Yeah yeah," Cole waved him off. "Keep pretending, bluey."
Lloyd laughed and reached over to offer his hand for Kai to hold. Kai took it gently, and didn't miss the way everyone stared at their joined hands, their fingers twining together.
"No matter what comes in the future, we'll face it together," Lloyd promised Kai, and they felt each other's pulses jump at his words.
Kai nodded, soaking up the way the light hit the pale gold of Lloyd's hair, making it look just like a glowing halo. This boy would be the death of him, he just knew it. He couldn't help the smile spreading across his face. He raised a spoonful of chili towards Zane, Cole, and Jay and gave his best unhinged grin. "The future looks bright for you and me both, but right now I say we take these three down for being so obnoxious," he suggested and Lloyd grinned too, wild and full of fire, just like Kai.
"What?" Zane sputtered. "I didn't do anything!"
"Wait!" Jay cried out. "But we helped you propose to him, Kai!"
Lloyd snorted while Kai rolled his eyes. "Sure you did," the Master of Fire said, then launched the first spoonful at Jay's surprised face.
"Food fight!!!" Nya cried, pounding her fist on the table before she upended her entire plate on Kai's head.
Kai gasped, shaking sticky shrimp out of his hair. Reaching up, he felt the clingy, pasty sauce of the dish matting his once-immaculate spikes, and he shrieked, "GET HER, LLOYD!"
With a roar, the table fell into chaos again. As the ninja threw handfuls of food at each other — except for Cole who sat there lamenting the waste of it all — Lloyd and Kai looked at each other and smiled. Everything that they had ever done, all that they had ever faced and clawed their way through, had been worth it for moments just like this. With a laugh, Kai leaned in and kissed Lloyd in front of everyone, not even caring to keep anything concealed anymore.
He didn't even care when Nya shouted, "Gross!" and splashed the rest of her water on them. With a smirk, he pulled Lloyd closer and set a palm to the boy's back to dry out his clothes.
"You know," Zane said afterwards, as everyone settled down. "Someone has to clean all this up before Master Wu returns."
"Not me!" Jay was the first shout.
"We will," Lloyd said calmly, volunteering an unwilling Kai before he could protest. "We started this after all."
"They had it coming," Kai argued but stopped when Lloyd cast him a sharp look.
"You said you'd follow wherever I lead," Lloyd reminded Kai, then smirked his signature smirk when Kai let out yet another groan.
"Alright then," Kai sighed. "Lead me to the dishes."
"Get used to this," Jay said smugly. "This is going to be married life for you from now on."
Cole stood up from his seat and brought the rest of his plate down, shrimp-first, on Jay's head. "And this is going to be married life with me," he promised the Master of Lightning and walked away smiling.
"Welcome to the family," Nya said to Lloyd before standing up from the table.
"Can't be crazier than my family," Lloyd called after her, then turned to Lloyd. "Well, let's get cleaning."
Kai sighed melodramatically but didn't complain. He had promised to follow Lloyd wherever he lead him, even if it was just to another mess to clean up. So he smiled as he knelt down to pick up pieces of dinner from the floor with Lloyd. He wouldn't have traded it for anything else.
#*hides face behind pillow and screams*#im so embarrassed - it reads terribly >.<#i have so many angsty greenflame fics in my drafts but i wanted to finish this one since it was so lighthearted#i worked on it for a few days but it still feels weak in certain places#i like writing jay being bitchy but maybe he was too much in this one? sorry sorry ;-;#also one of my headcanons is that zane is the matchmaker of the team bc pixal likes to give him the compatibility rates of the ninja#she created a monster mahaha#i think jay and cole have a low compatibility but zane ships them so he and pixal argue about that a bit lol#i was considering adding nya/skylor to this but i wanted to develop them more in my head first#my writing is so bad ;-;#and this title was stupid but i couldn't think of anything else#maybe the ending was a bit weak too#i'd love to hear some thoughts on this#honey writes#fic#greenflame#bruise#bruise shipping#ninjago#sorry to tag this#btw i like to think all the ninja fangirls go rabid when they find out greenflame married lol#please lmk if there are errors i posted this quickly#thank you so much for reading
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