#im tagging it bc i need ppl to think about her
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i lied i changed the tag immediately. anywayyy maybe ill just start typing and see if inspo comes to me. i think itd be kind of funny if in this au ei and makoto arent even related, ei is just an actual android body double commissioned for makoto. i cant rmb, inazuma didnt know makoto existed right? did they just not know there was a handover 500 years ago... but yea thats gonna add a little identity crisis to the mix (remembers fontaine) wait... ok we'll get to there when we get there!! inazuma first
i suppose yae is just made for the shrine... everyone else that has like a normal job, just assume theyre made for their normal job ok. ittos is not a normal job tho. UNLESS... genius strat where they make a "gang leader" that is actually harmless and even plays with kids, but is capable of overpowering other gangs, thus. no actual criminal gangs!! we onto smth here. kuki wouldnt be needed tho but since she has that shrine story she can be one of those that had their purpose changed perhaps. how? well either its sentience or someone behind the scenes 🤷♀️ dont think abt it too deeply
who else... everyone else is kind of self explanatory i think. they just... do their jobs/help people they work alongside. i suppose kokomis different since shes in a position of power, and they have that family line jazz, so its kind of weird for her to be a commercial (celestia) android. maybe we can just assume technology is fairly advanced in this era so theyre not all commercial? people can just make their own. oh yeah this ties back into daydreams' original concept of like... broken down models being fixed up by readers... who knows, maybe people even make imitations. hm. maybe that should be neuvillette since hes an enemy of celestiaOkay i keep jumping to fontaine for some reason
should i keep it to one nation a reblog or just keep going. imma keep going. now how do we fit in rukkhadevatas whole thing... i also dont claim to be very knowledgeable about all the desert stuff (and havent finished the pari quest😭) but its probably also not celestia approved so maybe its also a separate faction? wait hold on. the forbidden knowledge can just be. a virus. and some buggy code is left in rukkhadevatas memory so nahida had to delete her loooool okay with how tech they made sumeru this fits really nicely.
im gonna say cynos bad jokes+tcg interest was not scripted at all cuz idk why theyd do that unless some engineer was like wouldnt it be funny. i mean thats also possible ig but like with kuki, sentience is an option... i think this entire au was (partially) inspired when i read smth (an anon on daydream's blog maybe?) about alhaitham and nahida being school guides or something. alhaitham proobably wouldnt be a teacher type i think he just helps them do admin and is fully aware the sages delegate a lot of work to the "scribe" bc they know hes an android. oooh but maybe they keep it quiet and not even everybody knows hes an android so hes like Lol if youre gonna masquerade me as a human you better treat me like one and give me time off and holiday pay etc. yeah thats funny
...i have no idea how to fit in his and kavehs roommate situation. it would be funny if kaveh wasnt an android and just had no idea (bonus angst when he finds out and is like uve been lying to me?!?!) though i did start this thinkihg vision holders would all be androids. WAIT WHAT DOES THAT MEAN FOR THE VISION HUNT DECREE. oh i guess its just "deactivate that mf" huh. no thats weird cuz yoimiya wouldnt be able to be "alive" for the coup... maybe it fr just disables their elemental powers. which could be connected to their ambitions who knows, that could be the original concept.
okay now weve got that squared away, back to sumeru. ill put kaveh on the backburnerWait. what if there was like a. make someone into an android a la nikke bc theyre dying or just because. and he did that but now hes broke bc of the payment for it. okayy maybe.
also im thinkin if usually the ppl in charge commission these droids (i mean that might spoil a lot of the rebellion plotlines) maybe celestia also just randomly releases models that werent commissioned... okay what i wanted to get at was, the sages wouldnt have commed nilou (unless they were more lenient on the arts in the past which is possible i just cant rmb) but if not i guess she can just be a random celestia release. who the fuck made layla
aaaand ive been avoiding the elephant in the room... scaramouche. i do love the idea of each of his forms being different models. ahhh it would be cool if ei actually did make him, not celestia. using her own knowledge and power but shes not perfect and neither is he (ok thats not why she deemed him unsuitable) (omg. it was bc he cried on birth and she was like ah hes too soft (human) HaHaHa that would be really Funny if it reminds her of makoto Lol)
so... kabukimono escapes his holding and tatarasuna happens... damn the whole irminsul-history-wipe thing doesnt really work here. unless, if we are still setting this in the original universe with magic and stuff, just with MORE androids, then i guess irminsul could exist. just that instead of being a corrupting Thing in rukkhadevata, the forbidden knowledge is a corrupting virus. 👍
back to scara. there isnt much to change here, he can absolutely still have his human crisis because none of the people he stayed with were vision holders so he never met a fellow android. and hes also different from fellow androids anyway since ei made him! wow! double whammy! anyway dottore
everything is just the same actually. like this doesnt change anything in the plot they still make that fuckass robot. okay is there anything else in sumeru im missing. oh right earlier i was like why would they make layla cuz i was like. they should not encourage sleeping in class. but it could be like, yk, relatable to students, but she still gets work done so yk no excuse (except that shes an android)!! i also know she has some identity issues but i havent done her hangout yet so... gonna leave it there, idk if itll affect this too much. faruzans just a teacher, etc etc, dori could be a plant or just commissioned/made by the black market lol
cyno and sethos' Thing... hmmmmmmm. i guess, instead of kids they just made two androids to be the host for the the soul of h. im trying to remember but all thats coming to mind is hamarhaft which is a weapon in bg3. quick google: hermanubis. yes. oooh so maybe cyno isnt commissioned by the sages at all! yeah okay that makes things make sense!
hmmmmm. collei. she didnt have a vision in the manga, right... perhaps dottores experiment is to "fix" eleazar patients by combining them/putting their brain into an android? yeah that sounds plausible (dottore fans dont gut me cuz i never read too deeply into his experiments)
that should be all outliers in sumeru? onto fontaiWAIT I FORGOT ABOUT KAZUHA. hm. hmmm. yk its possible that the inazuma clans comm their own androids, so like, the kamisatos... (i also think itd be an extra layer to ayakas angst if the public didnt know they were androids.) so maybe the kaedeharas made one on the last of their money lol. his friend is i really dont know he could be anything, all that matters is hes an android (had a vision) and was killed by ei (driving a sword through an android should probably fuck it up. especially if the sword is empowered by elemental magic and ei was part of the original archon lineup).
then he fucks off to explore the world. definitely not a commercial android. haha even though he and scara would be popular choices (not necessarily tgt) but i accidentally made them one of a kind so no you cant really go to the market and buy a scara android. though i suppose that does delve more into "genshin plot is just a story the company made to drive sales" rather than "genshin plot is happening right now".
baaaack to fontaine. oooh boy oh boy. to start, focalors was against celestia from the start, though i dont think itd be too bad to say they made her and she went r—wait i forgot, the previous hydro archon passed the title to her. side note what the fuck are oceanids in this au. androids lite. nah maybe they can still be oceanids. so the prev hydro archon (egaria? no its egeria) passed the title of archon to focalors. perhaps she did an ei and made her own droid? how does passing the archon title work with this though... unless archon isnt really assigned the androids, thats just what they called the initial lineup and those that still have that initial model treat them as gods. so egarias the commercial bot that went rogue. or something im looking at her wiki and the history is... um a lot more complicated im not even sure if she was part of the original archon lineup. okay thats not important. whats important is: what the fuck is furina???
furina is supposed to be part fontainian, so part oceanid... magic fuse an oceanid with a droid and bam...! but splits them in two... shit then the droid is the one hiding instead lol. but hey with all their pneuma ousia shit maybe it needs to be a droid converting all that energy! but normal fontainians are not immortal the way furina is/was sooo... idk we're mixing scifi and fantasy magic so theres probably something connecting the two of them to each other, some battery inside them, or maybe furinas like 1/4 droid while focalora is 1/4 oceanid. that could work.
WHAT THE FUCK IS NEUVILLETTE. clearly not made by celestia. lol since they stole the power from the dragons its just an old company that maybe pioneered this tech but celestia stole it!?!? i feel like i should be thinking about khaenriah here. but anyway. neuvillette canonically isnt pure dragon so maybe its like... the creators have lost some of their materials or process due to celestia so they cant make a proper dragon again. so they just make a humanoid also to masquerade under celestias gaze (spoiler: they aint even notice?)
so how does the transfer of power work... focalors kills herself, WHAT THE HELL IS THE WHALE DOING HERE, and gives up her "archon powers"... which, here, can be some kind of magical tech that neuvillette takes. bit more manual work perhaps but we ball
okay. the fatui. the tsaritsa (glances at wiki) isnt even the original cryo archon, but otherwise we dk much. but i think its prooobably fair to assume she makes the fatui. or does nikke shit like dottore was gonna do except like better. and delusions? just. fucked up versions of the elemental magic (visions) other bots have ORRR its just terrible for mortals since its not that bad for visionholders. spews toxic shit idk. REGARDLESS. okay obviously not all the fatui are from snezhnaya... maybe she makes the normal fatui army looool ok ignore ALL of this since we dont really know anything about her, i was just trying to figure out the house of hearth 😭😭😭
so. we have to remember the fontainian oceanid thing. hold on what the fuck then fontainians cant be androids here since theyre full human(ish). hmm. hmmmmm. alright, so, hm. fuck. i dug myself into a hole. OKAY. lets see. what if the fontainians are all actually a kind of oceanid-droid egeria made. its just that focalors has extra archon tech in her from egeria. so all fontainians have like (i was gonna say kill switch which im not sure is better than dissolving to water honestly) a latent ability to become magical (get visions) to make up for... celestia not giving them any because they were like what the fuck, egeria.
i mean its also possible celestia also sent normal androids there you just cant tell. and its not like everyones tested the primordial water, maybe they actually wont be affected (who would even want to risk it lol), you really just cant tell. like we can just say all the playable/important chars we know never touched primordial water (well obviously. cuz theyre. still alive)
pause i just saved this as a draft just in case i accidentally like close the app and i realised i DO have another draft talking about inazuma bots. and it had this crazy idea of the real ayato and ayaka dying so they made bots of them. but the other stuff i wrote there about ei is not as interesting as the one i wrote here tho so scrap that. i did have one interesting line about venti and zhongli not being their original prototype archon model anymore and ei still was because she just makes new models/upgrades. then its funny cuz im like yea rukkhadevata probably figured that out with the irminsul (nahida must be a new model) and fontaine has its own problem so its just. venti and zhongli. old ass men being the originals. WAIT WHAT IF VENTIS APPEARANCR WAS JUST THE NAMELESS BARD AND THEY NIKKEFIED HIM. what is a wind spirit. actual wind spirit or little ai lmao.......
ok so back to um, the HoH. arle only gets her vision after becoming the knave, right, she fights the whoever orphanage mom with her own blood powers first (wtf is that btw i feel like theres no explanation in game but ig it doesnt appear much in game either so its okay...?) maybe just a defective bot or smth... MOVING ON i just wanted to get to the trio siblings...
wow okay i wanted to get to them cuz i like them but now that im here im like... what could i say. theyre the "doing jobs" droids again. cant even say theyre fatui made bc of the fontainian thing and most of them are just normal people. sorry damn. damn i think the rest of the chars are also just "doing jobs" droids. oh well
i havent touched natlan at all so i cant say anything about them 🤷♀️ JESUS THIS WAS LONG AF WHATS WRONG WITH ME (the undiagnosed autism, my oomfs would say)
SHUT UP OMG i just looked at my drafts again, i had ANOTHER inazuma draft written where id alr come up w the idea of makoto being human. ah well. Wait this doesnt mesh with makoto also considered an archon before ei took over LETS WORRY ABT THAT LATER CUZ that short draft also had an extra concept for the kamisatos which is. parents couldnt conceive so they commed ayato and ayaka without telling the public theyre androids. so its either they start androids or replace humans... im thinking start because theres not really enough time between the familys deaths to make new models of them. unless their deaths were separate and earlier and somehow kept very hushed up... yeah no. they were always androids. WHEW NOW WE'RE DONE. I PROMISE. MAYBE
i simply think it is so fun to imagine a world where a company makes a bunch of androids to assist people and provide companionship so they give the androids stories and release them in certain themes or lines and those androids are the genshin characters. credit to @yandere-daydreams for the idea. i love it so much. yes we all want x character to be our boyfriend or girlfriend and we have sex with them yes but i think its fun to imagine their roles when theyre not being yandere...
also the read more is very long i just went off about my ideas for most of the mondstadt characters. nothing wrong with me
if this is set in teyvats world imagine amber being like a gliding instructor in mondstadt. good engineer too, maybe the first bot that can fix other bots/have intricate knowledge of them (because she made baron bunny).
for human injuries theres barbara and jean, but with different temperaments for different patients. or if we're still set in teyvat, then jean (and the rest of the favonius knights characters) are actually android assistants to the actual human knights. basically the androids replace vision holders??
but yeah kaeya would also be a knight assistant, noelles story is she trains super hard but still isnt a knight (because shes made to help actual trainees!). lisa of course manages the library. yeah sorry thats it. makes tea
and i had the idea (this is all stolen from my own twitter thread from *checks* last year? anyway) that they would tease the release of bots like diluc, rosaria and razor through voicelines from kaeya, barbara and lisa. really like the idea of razor originally being some sort of surveillance android for wolvendom/integrating with them in some way for research and sort of became a guide for people who get lost in wolvendom.
diona and diluc are two different types of bartenders, one is good against people who cant say no to a cute (angry) kitty and the others... are those require some intimidation.
VENTI. god, i think itd be cool if they had prototype models for the seven archons and actual venti bots now definitely play into the "broke bard who plays for alcohol" thing. but of course anyone with eyes knows that his original model was the barbatos android.
oh!! and bennett and fischl being adventurers buddies. bennett is "unlucky" but hes actually like, wired to be hypervigilant and take hits for you while he shrugs it off. and fischl comes with oz if you need some chuuni speech translated, but you can disable that if you want to go full rp with her.
*looks at my thread* oh yeah "Albedo is made for the alchemists in the Knights, and he was meant to be released with Klee, but there was a delay because his ai kept experimenting on its own copies (Flowerfell Albedo?)" ngl i didnt play the albedo event and never bothered to watch a video so i dont know the full extent of his lore here. oh right and i added "sucrose is made to keep an eye on him in the labs" lmao
klee is. i suppose made for the knights. a cute energetic girl to keep morale up, whos fireproof and thus able to scout dangerous areas/bomb them if you so wish.
oh yeah i wrote that the church was not happy about the rosaria bots being made so they relegated her to guarding dragonspine against foolish adventurers. as to why she keeps appearing in bars, well, uh. No comment — Celestia Inc.
the lawrence clan wanted in on this business and sponsored a representative of their family, but mondstadts opinion of them is less than friendly, so the knights compromise and make eula, a lawrence knight.
whew okay for some reason i was able to churn out a lot for mondstadt and then everyone else i was like uh yeah. they exist and do things similar to what they do in game like xiangling being a cook's aide. yep. idk why the mondstadt worldbuilding gripped me so hard like that.
also my last thought is that maybe the hilichurls are just the verryyy alpha version of their bots, the khaenri'ah line (i think daydream mentioned this) and maybe just broke down and went rogue/abandoned. so now they make better bots to fight them and keep people safe. go figure. earns them a ton of cash though. lol imagine if getting them was a lottery too....
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One of my main takes on adeline is still that she is more in control of whats happening to her than the context would make you think. I hate all portrayals of her as naive (dont get me started on that) i think that she very much is being manipulated by the church in many ways but all her decisions were her own. She lacks agency but she is still in control of her fate somewhat. I think the research hall experimented on many that were not consenting/did not know what was being done to them, but i don't think she was one of them. Not necessarily because shes a blood saint, if anything i think that did not matter that much wrt who was chosen for the experiments, but just because she made that choice of her own will. Now the arguing point is more of a philosophical one i guess aka how much of it is her own choice if part of why she decided to do it was because the church instilled into her the idea that she is worth nothing as a human being. So she has been biased but her hand was not forced exactly. I'm always saying it but my favorite thing about her is how clearly stubborn she is and i think that plays into it. But back to what i was saying, i think she has a relatively clear idea of everything around her and i dont think she is blind to the church's practices. She has utmost faith in them but i don't think shes unaware of what they do. I think she has some kind of like... knowledge that is beyond what youd assume her to have, it's mostly just A Take, the only way in which i see this reflected in her dialogues is the fact she knows exactly what she needs to ascend and that gives her that feeling of like... Knowing more than what would seem normal for someone in her position, i think especially in the nightmare with ascension nearing she is getting a sense of what precise steps she needs to take to get where she wants to be. I don't know if what I'm typing makes any sense it's really late. I think in the nightmare she has access to inherent knowledge about the mechanics of this world that she doesnt necessarily Understand, she just Knows. It's something she would not be able to explain but she feels.
#i might be completely incoherent rn im really tired forgive me#but i think the point im trying to make gets across ok enough#bloodborne#im tagging it bc i need ppl to think about her#and also im feeling brave i want to advertise myself back into the world Maybe. hard maybe
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NO MORE ASSOCIATING THINGS WITH FEMMES ONLY BECAUSE THEY ARE PINK!HYPERFEM FEMMES ARE GREAT AND I LOVE YOU CAMPY FEMMES WHO EMBODY PINK BUT ALSO JESUS CHRIST CAN YOU GUYS NOT GO MORE THAN ONE DAY W/O TRYING TO SHOEHORN FEMMES INTO BEING ONLY PINK UWU BABIES. I AM FEMME AS IN GRASS AS IN DIRT AS IN TREE BARK AS IN WEEDS SPROUTING THROUGH THE SIDEWALK CEMENT. FEMME AS IN GENDER NONCONFORMITY AS IN FUCK YOU MY FEMININITY IS WHAT *I* SAY IT IS. FEMME AS IN DEPTH AND DARKNESS AND WARMTH AND TERROR. FEMME AS IN CAVES. FEMME AS IN LIGHTNING. FEMME AS IN AN AMALGAMATION OF TRAITS THAT I HAVE DECIDED ARE FEMININE REGARDLESS OF WHAT SOCIETY SAYS. FUCK IS IT THAT HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!???
#personal#i am emotional yes#over the years ive had this blog I've made a few posts abt being femme#nd whether they're serious or jokey..... inevitably someone in the tags goes “ohhh yeah bc pink”#or in the case of what inspired this post: someone going “what about the pink ones” on my praying mantis post#and im just.#sick of it. im sick of femme being equated to pink and frilly girlie behaviors.#im sick of femme being equated to skirts and heels. to makeup. to skincare. to pristine nails exactly almond shaped.#im sick of ppl acting like All femmes aspire to this shit. im sick of femms being reduced to this shit.#and i love pink! i love pink! my phone theme is quite literally just black and pink all over.#im just. so tired of any expression of Femme identity being shoehorned into being a Specific type of femininity#especially as someone who DOES get dysphoric wearing skirts. wearing dresses. embodying the femme aesthetic yall are so set on making#if u guys wanna rb this i truly dont care#i just needed to scream#and this is one small thing#but the 2nd largest category of anon hate i have gotten since making this blog is str8 up homophobia from other “queer” folks#saying i cant be femme bc of how i present. calling me slurs (and using them as such) bc they cant understand femme as anything but that#my wife and i have our users in our personal discord server set as 2 different things of anon hate ive gotten#i have had OTHER FEMMES tell me i am not femme. femmes who Know im femme who still call me butch. femmes who ive corrected and been blocked#-by bc of it. the number 1 largest demographic of queerfolk who have me blocked rn is TME femmes who embody pink also#and i dont think its a coincidence at all. (and i know this bc i go to try and follow these ppl bc they get rbed on my dash & i cant)#and ik their blogs arent deleted bc some of them don't block my wife (tall. white. butch) and it cant be politics cause her and i rb#a lot of the same political shit (fuck. i think she rbs More than i do even. this is genuinely mainly a nsft blog)#and usually i don't say anything but im having a bad day so i get to be angry about this and if anyone fucking tries me i will block u#idc if we've been mutuals 4ever. im judt so tired of feeling like i am not Enough as a femme bc i dont embody this shit#im sick of this lameass lip service to he/him gnc femmes etc when the thin white 50s housewife femme is still what is preferred and loved#im sick of this lamesss lip service when y'all feel entitled to theorizing on other femmes genders bc u cant conceptualize a femme who does#wanna be hypetfeminine. im sick of it. im sick of it. im sick of it.#celebrity bun
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Skip has always found a way to work through his problems and turn them around with relative ease, but the sudden death of his wife, Brandi, has brought his mostly carefreeness towards his children to a stand-still. With two freshly traumatized children and a newborn under his belt, can Skip juggle turning his shitty ass life around for his family, or will he crumble under the weight of his past mistakes?
Darleen hasn’t been the same since her husband, Darren, died, though she’d be quick to argue with you if you said anything of the sort. She’s FINE! She misses her husband, undoubtedly, but she’s not going to let that very, very, very tiny thing wreck her whole life, and she’s not going to let people give her grief about ANYTHING. Sure, she got fired from her job a few months back and hasn’t made any strides to find a new one, and she’s losing touch with her son as she goes and squanders all her responsibilities by partying and drinking on par with younger years, aaaaaaaaaaaaand the almost obsessive idealistic crush she’s developed on her neighbor is clouding the second half of her judgment, but she’s bounced back from worse and knows everything’s going to come up Darleen :) …………. hopefully
#POSTING THIS BC IVE HAD IT DONE FOR 2 MONTHS KINDA? i kept feeling uninspired andiffy abt it tho so it just made me not want to finish it#posting this before i change my mind i hate darleens desc but its the only one im rockin with at the same time#ANYWAYS BASE D ON A SEMI AU IDEA IVE BEEN THINKING OF. WTV. DUSITN AN DIRK WOULD ACTUALLY HAVE TO BE YOUNGER FOR THIS AU TO MAKE SENSE. but#idc it just for funsies#common skip and darleen l's tbh#i support my alcoholic delusional wife in these dire times.#💙#other names for these pics:#pls dont ask skip and darleen where their children r bc they dont kno#the painful ass crick darleens about tohave in her neck when she wakes up#skip doesnt know how to hold a baby apparently and its not bc there was something wrong with how i rigged him nooooooooo#gordon pls leave ppl alone and get a life#in my maxis dev 04 era the way these pics r so lazy#POTRAYING DARLEEN AS A GIRLFAILURE honestly. love fail darleen i need to do it more and show it more.#thats all if u read these tags i think ur in love with me and we should kiss
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i do think a good shtola arc for the future would be like, her sort of calculated recklessness with her own life negatively affecting someone else and her having to reckon with that
#like for example i just don’t think they dealt with her forever altering thancred!!!#man. they could have done so much with that + the tension between them in shb#i feel like ppl don’t really consider how close they are like she has a whole little speech about how she expects better of him#bc she knows he can be better!! bc they’ve known each other so long.#and now she has to charge his cartridges bc she permanently altered his ability to use aether. while trying to save him!!#i have like a vague memory of him being like well i’m not mad bc she saved me but i have no idea if that’s real or i read it in a post ahdj#i don’t have thancred brain im sorry😭#but anyway. they care about each other so much but i think they should have gone into this a little more.#well there’s always fic.#i need a text post tag#shadowbringers spoilers#oh i forgot where i started with this but essentially i want her to like really have to think about how far she will#go for answers. and to decide when it’s enough!! idk what i hope the outcome will be.
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cant wait for the solevellan reunion in veilguard knowing aila (my poor sad oc) will try to kill him on sight
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age inquisition#solas dragon age#solas#the thing is. she was already pretty unhinged post base game#whole clan is dead and closest confidant (and previous partner) left with no goodbye or anything#and shes not like. articulate or anything i dont think she knows how to read or write#at least she didnt in the beginning maybe josephine helped her or something#and then after stopping a potential war (iirc im playing through tresspasser rn lmao)#she sees that fucker again#and hes the reason any of this happened#shes fuckin pissed dude#where she has trouble seeing reason bc her anguish and anger blind her#solas feels so guilty for all that hes done and how his actions have harmed mages and elves for like#what 1000 years or something like that#theyre both sad wet cats is what im saying#their reunion WILL need a mediator#but i mean thats just aila tho im curious to how other ppls lavellan will react to the egg#or even just how other inquisitors will react#hahhhhh aila used to be so happy and then her family died and it was all downhill from there tbh#she was fine with the breakup i think. sad but fine#wait did he leave w no goodbye i might be misremembering tbh#ANYWAY hashtag aila loredump in the tags lets gooooooo#we dont talk about my other character i beat the game with
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you stop shaving as a woman and people just dont know what to call you anymore huh
#you ever get so annoyed that you draw ur irl self instead of your epic swag yass slay pretty sona#i didnt stop shaving for any statement btw it just drains me to do it & i havent been in the mood for months LMAO#i think i'm so used to the comfort of being surrounded by ppl presenting however they want and calling themselves whatever#sometimes i forget how. binary everything still is where i live#note that aint trans btw. i was afab & i dont fully identify as that currently but i have no problem being called a girl#and due to Health Reasons(tm) i get hairier than one would consider 'normal' for a woman (among other things)#(listen we all know gender is a nuanced spectrum but im not in the mood to talk about it in the tags of my own blog lol)#that + short + fat + voice breaks sometimes + mostly wears 'gender neutral' clothing. been mistaken for a prebuscent guy sometimes#(i say 'gender neutral' but its just regular ass baggy shirts and pants/jeans. 💥)#and if y'know me personally youre prolly reading this like 'what'. and yeah thats my reality sometimes LMAO#and im spanish so things are Extra gendered >8'D#i dont even bother explainin my gender to family its just not worth it so i take the she/her and move on#usually i dont talk about these irl things bc whatever but it's starting to irritate me lol#like. do i have to fuckin shave just to not be misgendered. fuckin christ dude#i need to get my yearly haircut btw. i dont like long hair on myself. its getting warm & it makes me sweat i hate it 🧍♂️
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Finally got around to buying the Nikke profile stickers I want since I keep drawing dupes! Bought all the Bow Wow Paradise ones!! It was one of my fave events bc I love dogs and dog girls and Happy Zoo and ESPECIALLY Biscuit so much. As you can see, I got all the 'dog' girls as my showcase team, too, lol:
Also, as an aside, I just got a new personal record in Overclock at level 16!! Which is why I remembered I needed to edit my profile when I went to check if it changed to 16 (I think I was at 12 maybe last time they ran Overclock in the Simulation Room).
#nikke#biscuit nikke#dog girls#nikke goddess of victory#goddess of victory: nikke#side note i wish they gave the header icons for crossover events bc i have A2 fully kitted out and maxxed out#i mean. i still dunno anything about her besides the event in nikke but shes literally my top fighter lol biscuit is number 2#(but biscuit is number one in my heart)#i forget was i tagging these posts with my Plays tags?#Cori Plays Nikke#Cori.exe#Image.exe#Post.exe#wait shit i just realized leona is technically a dog girl too i JUST got her recently so this whole time i thought she was a fox girl#(bc of her colour palette)#i think in either her character story or in general counseling session she mentioned being a wolf#its just. who do i kick off the lineup then#like biscuit and liter are 100% set. jackal is ehh but always called a dog and bites a lot so. red hood has the whole wolf symbolism.#and poli... i cant take poli off bc the dog girl allegations are just too fucking funny#hmm i guess whoever i draw again between leona and jackal i will choose to keep there#bc ive had jackal on my wishlist since d outsiders and only drew her ONCE. i need to complete Exotic in my regular team hffff#i have too many tetras i havent drawn yet so i dont think leona is even on the wishlist any more im going for completion of roster first#(rip to all the event nikkes i missed ughhh)#but yeah. whoever gets the first star will earn jackals spot then out of fairness#i unfortunately missed a lot of potential leona pulls bc of a health emergency when her event was running ugh#but yeah. thats my post. i love dog girls. (and dog boys ofc but thats in a diff game lol)#also. man i need to find a new union. i think most ppl arent active any more and it did not have that name when i joined lol#oh just in case so i wont have to edit again if i wasnt using spaces:#CoriPlaysNikke
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like i genuinely cannot believe thegall that she has quinn saying that oh they loved being servants... really??
[ID: Text reading:
"“I let them go into the front parlor together, and then I went into the kitchen for lunch, where Jasmine was just telling Big Ramona that they were rich. I hated to break up their happiness with my glum looks and I blamed it all on hunger. Besides, Jasmine had always been rich and so was Big Ramona. They just never wanted to leave Blackwood Manor, everybody knew."/end ID]
#twist rambles#vc posting#sorry im so fucking sick of it. 1. set in 1990. 2. she does this w like quite literally EVERY slave character (of which most are barely#prominent characters outside of her using antiblack stereotypes. as im sure u can imagine which one of those a character named big ramona#fits.) and 3. we are really supposed to be on quinns side after it seems he pressured jasmine into sex after using terms such as#“my chocolate candy” “cafe au laut” “milk chocolate” to her. like out loud. we are supposed to like this guy?? like her racism (annes) know#no bounds atp#ask to tag#yeah haha the servants loveee being here lol they dont even need to be paid ^_^ theyre just that rich bc we are some of the GOOD ones. jesu#and this has been going on since the start of the book and just keeps on coming over and over#like not even to get into how all of these esrvants are objectified and jasmine esp is just reduced to a sex object. but the seconddd quinn#sees a white lady hes literally proposing. but jasmine isnt good enough for that in the narratives portrayal of her. its all fucking vile.#i dont want to hear ANYONE say she didnt have horrific handling of race when all this happens in this book and last book had mar.ius#referring to an indian man like he was an animal and had no human qualities. like genuinely i do not think ppl know how bad it is bc most#ppl stop after the first 3 books. and for good reason. anyways good god im so pissed off. my beautiful lj buddy had about 3 paragraphs on#the insane classism she demonstrated last chapter and it rly just keeps continuing to this chapter. like im sorry idc abt how rich quinn is#i need him dead. for many reasons. anyways good god. this book is hell.
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i dont think i ever felt more annoyed at commercials than when those mean girls walmart ads were playing a few months ago or whenever that was
#i think it's mostly bc i thought mean girls was like. an okay movie. a fine movie? i think i liked it#but like. i saw it once. i have no nostalgia for it bc i saw it way later/not when it originally came out#and god the way people are so into it. i mean that is great like i dont wanna be a hater for people enjoying things#but me personally. i do not understand why it's a cult classic or whatever klsjfkdlsfj i hear people quote it all the time and im like. 🧍#so having those quotes i already dont care about re contextualized to try to sell me walmart. god. the worst experience jkfsdjfklJFDKLSJF#tbh maybe it woudlve been worse if i liked the movie but i saw comments saying those commercials were funny so WHATEVER#i feel like it's also the same w/like. vocaloid kfsjdflksjgh like i dont dislike it!! i enjoy some songs#but i never had a vocaloid phase when i was younger. i feel so very neutral about miku#ppl on the internet feel so strongly positive and again thats great and i objectively get it#ive been shown vocaloid songs and some are really catchy#but it is one of those instances where im like man. a level of hype i dont fully understand LOL#miku vocaloid stuff is at least endearing tho. i get.... tired... w/mean girls quotes......... ksljfsljfl#It's Always The Same Ones and i just dont think theyre very funny FKJLDSJFDKLSJF maybe i am a hater damn#jk i do think i liked the movie? god i dont remember i watched it like. i dont even know when. college at the earliest i think#but whatever thats just a case of people having different interests just cuz i didnt care about a thing doesnt man its bad other ppl like i#also tho i think bc the mean girls overquoted bits remind me of like. rae dunn ceramics LOL jkfskfjsekht#or like idk live laugh love stuff. yknow like. dont talk to me until ive had my coffee has same energy as on wednesdays we wear pink. to me#it's facebook wine mom humor.... bc it is people roughly my age that were/are really into it and they are now mom age i guess lwpfhewhfp#god i need to go to bed im tired and it's making me a cranky complainer about stuff that doesnt matter!!!!#went 2 my dash in a dif tab and immediately saw a miku post is she gonna get me for not having strong feelings about her#im sorry miku i just . i dont get it JKFLJDSKLFJKSLD#ur music is fun i just dont proportionately understand. i feel like im missing context w/this one girl maybe thats my bad idk#or maybe it's just i found u too late idk. i will jam to the bops tho#that endless/everlasting/whatever nights thing w/like the 4 alt storyline songs is soooo fun i love those#dont ask me the names of the ppl in them tho i dont fuckin know besides like. 3 of them. one is miku LOL#and those yellow twin kids. len and ren. or rin? len and rin? i dont remember and i dont care enough to look it up sorry small children#theres that blue haired guy that was in the one prsk route i played but i forgot his name again#i dont know if hes in those songs i was talkin about tho i only remember what he looks like in his youthful wonderland alt loll#i talk in the tags bc i get scared it feels safe in my burrow here underground#also im calling mean girls mid and saying i dont have miku hype so i feel like that does warrant going into hiding
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gonna be honest I see anyone talking about this "my gender is more complicated than yours" shit as someone who genuinely cannot comprehend that other people that don't share certain traits with them can still in fact have rich interior lives. as an agender trans woman who uses she/her I've never had anyone say it to me who wasn't (usually unknowingly) transmisogynistic
see but im not talking about "rich interior lives" and the assumption that i am is exactly what im talking about. i am talking about the actual physical way that reality treats and percieves me in comparison to the way it treats and percieves you. saying my gender is "more complex" means to me that i am physically incapable of existing in a strictly binary world and that there is no thing i can pass as bc "binary man" and "binary woman" are both incorrect for me. and the Cisiety in question does not allow androgyny to exist - it is exclusively the timeframe people have to decide whether they think you are a cisman or a ciswoman, or a failure and a freak. i dont subscribe to that "binary privilege" shit, thats not how privilege works. but there are differences in the ways both you and i can navigate this strictly binary Cisiety!!! and those differences deserve to be named, imo
like. again. i dont have to comfort you about your own internal sense of gender before youll listen to me about my experiences in the real world as genderqueer. as a different sort of transsexual than you.
(and bc i Know what binary ppl love to say: i know not everyone is 'capable of passing'. what i am talking about specifically is the difference between being unable to pass as a cis woman or a cis man vs being unable to pass bc what i am does not exist AT ALL in a binary society, and both of those things are incorrect ans unattainable.)
(anyways if that language is too imperfect for you thats like fine but. its just confusing to me, i dont get why its hard to understand what we are talking about here. our experiences w our nonbinary genders are completely different! why do i have to discuss them like theyre the same?)
#do you consider yourself transfem first or agender first on an internal level?#do you feel like you are predominantly treated as a trans woman in your day to day? does that hurt the part of you that is agender?#< not trying to grill u or anything im genuinely curious#ive had similar convos w my transmasc and transfem nonbinary friends as well as like. my gnc binary trans friends#i am just curious bc. like i said 'binary' isnt a bad thing to be and frankly since u identify urself as agender ur not really the target a#dience here anyways?#the idea that theres no such thing as a binary trans person just#fundamentally misunderstands the extremely broad swathe of nonbinary experiences and treatments#my passing transmasc enby friends dont particularly feel touched by transphobia unless theyre clocked or unless our areas laws changed#but some DO feel like they r effected by exorsexism on a day to day by being assumed to be binary men and having the other parts of their i#entities erased#while others are completely comfortable being percieved as strictly men and moving through life strictly as men#which is sounds like. i would guess youd have a similar position since u exclusively use she/her?#like.. it sounds to me like your 'rich interior life' doesnt really have an outward effect on the way people percieve and treat you and the#way you react to it which is very different from my experience#binary doesnt mean your gender is 'simple' it just means that you are comfortable within a binary system even of you dont personally identi#y with it. and maybe this is a case of 'political identity vs personal identity'??#and all of this is FINE its just. literally every time i talk about my own unique positioning my transandrogyny or whatever gives me#people crawl out of the woodwork to tell me my experiences are not actually unique#do u see what my issue is? my own trans experiences are erased bc other people 'disagree' with . what. my perspective as an 'unaligned' enb#? when its like. literally none of us are gonna have the same needs or experiences as trans people#and if 'binary' works to show that you are fine and comfortable being percieved exclusively as a woman#and 'nonbinary' works to show i am not#i dont really see what the issue w using the word 'binary' is#like i said. its not a slur. its not a bad thing to be.#and tbh i think this insistence that 'unaligned' nonbinary ppls perspectives arent actually unique to binary or 'aligned' nonbinary ppls is#directly contributing to like. lateral bigotry coming from said 'unaligned' enbies. like if u put urself in my shoes for a second and u gre#up being constantly told you were either a cis invader who didnt actually have any trans experiences and that only people who want to 'full#transition' were REAL transsexuals then. youd be kinda jaded too right? and im sure you ARE kinda jaded lol.#anyways. sorry for rambling at you i dont have any more tags left lol
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GRAAAAAAAH MISREPRESENTING DATA DOES NOTHING FOR ANYONE EXCEPT FEED TROLLS WHO ARE TRYIGN TO TAKE OYU IN BAD FAITH ANYWAY OH MY GD
#mild vent#jsut kinda tired of checking sources and seeing time and time again people misrepresent data thats Easily checkable to support their points#u dont need to make up statistics you are literally making things worse for everyone bc now the arguments will be over what the stats REALL#are instead of the core issue u were talking about [insert upsidedown smiley here]#its like across topics too. ive seen so many bold claims linked to sources that when i check them there is 0 mention of that in the documen#or any of the (linked) supporting materials if its an article#this also isnt just about one post or one person or one rb ive been on this for MONTHS at home#i thnk my wife may be sick of me coming up to her and going over and over “this data isnt real” oh mygd#just. if you see something with a crazy stat and there's a source link maybe check it before rebloggin git#honestly even if its not stats related cause the number of times i see ppl rbing posts where OP absolutely would Not agree with them ro wou#be outright violent/aggressive/bigoted/etc abt topics they supposedly ccare abt. . . . . . ..#anyway for that one tho reminder to block the tags of hate groups! yes you will soemtimes miss a post but more importantly u will learn the#dogwhistles sO fucking fast.#anyway. idc if this makes sense its a tag vent and no one can rb anyway and discourse with ur momma if u think im mean for this ig
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Took me a while to realize but I can see similarities in how Asuka seems to process grief and how Guts from Berserk also processed his grief after the Eclipse. They both get so overwhelmed by the wrong that happened to them (father's hospitalization vs the Eclipse and a lifetime of misery) their reaction isn't to seek comfort in others or help/protect their loved one who needs them after the tragedy, it's to go off and inflict their pain on others to self soothe, as if that'll release the feeling from their minds.
The difference is that Guts was called out for this by Rickert and Godo. He needed to snap out of wanting to prioritize ridding his own pain to remember Casca needed him, and that Casca even in the state she was in was all the good in his life who went through the same experience with him. Guts had to remember he loves Casca more than he wants to self destruct. Like Godo told him he was a sword called fear with cracks in it. He feared sitting with his pain and grief and seeing it on the person he loved after so much violation. He feared vulnerability.
Asuka doesn't do this reevaluatation and has no one to call her out for her self destructive coping canonically. She can't sit with anything bad or face looking at it on a loved one either. That's too bad and helpless of a feeling. She's just as much made of fear (primarily from any helplessness as much as violations of her inner ethics) which fuels her anger, but her one personal attachment to her father who needs her isn't enough to make her want to reevaluate what she does at all. Instead his tragedy is the permission she needs to self destruct and destroy in the process, not like Guts who always told himself everything was for Casca and the fallen Hawks, who always reminded himself of the pain to justify the bloodletting.
Unlike Guts I think she'd be stubborn even accepting to listen to someone pointing her behavior out. Though her anger toward Feng did start out carrying a reminder this vengeance is for Dad even if it kills her in 5, even in 5's branching narratives that excuse falls apart when she continues in the tournament for her own pleasure during her route. The moment vengeance is achieved critically injured Dad is out of her mind. Her behavior during 6 repeats this process, preferring to hurt herself and others rather than sit to process a shitty feeling over her and the world's situation. Like Guts in this state she pushes away anyone and everyone else including any comforts because the anger isn't resolved, the fear isn't resolved, the pain isn't resolved.
They're both used to everyone being against them and having to fight for survival until they found joy in it as a side effect. And because of that independence born from isolation when something like the tragedies that happened takes place they put resolving their pain not on sharing with others but into scorching the earth along with themselves.
I don't say this either to imply they're exactly alike or that they have enough similarities to make a true character comparison because they absolutely don't. There's also some stuff I'm leaving out simply because Guts is a far more complex character in ways where there's nothing from Asuka to compare against (I would say Kazuya is the closest, more fitting Tekken comparison for substituting Guts vs Asuka style notes). I just find it interesting that even across wildly different stories the outline for an angry, self destructive, terrified person who thinks self destruction makes them strong and puts them in control uses a lot of the same foundation. And the contrast in their depths really shows how far you can push the concept depending on what you want or need for the character.
#tekken#berserk#I've haven't slept in six hours#asuka kazama#do i still think she'd pull a fighting 100 men for their lover type situation- MAYBE tbh#you could give her one technically but you'd have to really stretch her denial of seeing her violent behavior as ever being wrong#and that risks losing the scope of the character and the stakes level she represents#like i don't think she surpresses her pain into an other self at all she's very clear she's just reactionary so the brooding guilt#you need to have a BoD doesn't really apply at all she's not remorseful and ruminating on fighting in that sense at all whereas Guts guilts#Asuka hits you and moves on with her day because that should teach you; Guts is a whole storm of emotions and moral pulls even when numb#BoD is more a Jin thing but i still prefer Guts and not bc he did it first im sorry Jin jfjdhss#*you could give Asuka a BoD- idk why that tag is missing after the 100 men comment#anyway bitches who embody the sin of wrath#Asuka is about the childish joy and childish impulse we feel hurting others versus Guts being a study on why we hurt ppl bc we hurt too#*BoD is beast of darkness of course#also obviously there are lines Asuka will NEVER cross even in anger that Guts had no problem violating as Black Swordsman#so how does Asuka process grief...SHE DOESN'T LOL#she'd rather kill herself or dismiss feeling hurt than so much as cry
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soooo i was right 🫠😐🫥 the Friend like likes me and it seems e v e r y o n e around me has known sINCE FEBRUARY
#SO 👏🏾 let’s just let it be known that i’m an Obviously Silly Clown so no one needs to tel me that ik already so i already told y’all how he#said he needed to Talk to me and i was planning on avoiding him but my friends said not to bc it’s not the Adult Thing To Do and he is my#friend and i care about him so it wouldn’t be nice so i didn’t me and my roommate went to dairy queen with him after i finished braiding her#hair so we were getting out the car to go get ready for bible study at church but then he’s all like ‘VK i need to talk to you can you pleas#stay?’ and i was like KAJDJDJFJFJJD NO but on the outside i was such a Normal Girl and was like sure :)) so we’re in the parking lot and i l#left the door open bc i didn’t want to feel claustrophobic but i lied 🤥 and said it was hot so he starts out all like sorry i made you anxio#us by prolonging this talk and i was like lol no it’s fine i was busy with exams and stuff and he just kinda gets quiet and he was like sooo#i like you and i’m like#🤔😃🫠😶🫥😧 processing#and then i was like ok elaborate and he’s like i have feelings for you so i’m SHOOK BC WOWIE ppl aren’t cowards like me cause i could never#and i say well thanks for telling me and i think you’re really brave for that but i’m sorry i don’t feel the same way but i still want to be#friends but if you need space then it’s fine as well and he’s like ya i didn’t expect anything from you i just didn’t want to regret not#saying anything so i was ABOUT TO CRY BC I HAD TO REJECT HIM BC I REALLY DONT HAVE THOSE FEELJNGS FOR HIM so i left and went home and my <3#almost exploded from my chest i was on the verge of a panic attack and i told my roommate and she was LAUGHING BC SHES SUSPECTED HES LIKED#ME SINCE FEBRUARY when he paid for my pizza and aPpArEnTlY hOw He LoOkS aT mE 🙄 WHATEVER#AND THEN I TOLD MY SECOND ROOMMATE AND SHES LIKE O YA IM NOT SURPRISED#so i’m just an oblivious silly goose who doesn’t USE HER BRAIN like kajdjdjhddjd and and now i’m thinking of the things i’ve done that made#him think i like him too like i baker him a pie for his birthday and i just feel silly and need advice if anyone has any but if not it’s fin#just an update on my life if you’re interested#vk overshares in the tags
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Anyways I love futago siblings bc of the inherent drama to it & the complexity of feelings involved in it. And also I want futaba to suplex akechi in a sibling kind of way. It's not that complicated
#speculation nation#akeshu nation literally pardons him for trying to kill akira Twice#and youre caught up in futaba potentially forgiving him for killing her mom when he was 15#& context clues tell us that he was likely pressured into killing by shido?#it's not like hes doing this shit for fun. like ok he enjoyed killing okumura bc okumura's a piece of shit capitalist#but besides that. when we get to know him we learn that he wanted to be a hero when he was a kid#& that coupled with the way he acts in 3rd semester really paints a picture#he doesnt start killing again bc he doesnt need to. & Notably he stops trying to kill akira bc shido isnt pushing for that anymore#plus i dont think futaba has to forgive him for them to be friends. it will always be something present in their minds#but in the same sort of way of akira liking akechi enough that hes willing to give him the chance to atone for Shooting Him In The Head#i believe futaba could give him the chance to atone. or at least try to be a better person.#and i just think futaba would enjoy the excuse to limitlessly bully him.#the 'you killed my mom so u cant be mean to me' card. which she would pull a lot im sure#it wouldnt always work. especially if she overused it lol. but still.#and yea idk. i can get being uncomfortable with ppl trying to wave away the fact that he killed her mom#but when it's done right. i think it's quite a compelling relationship.#her seeing herself in him. recognizing the ways they are so painfully alike. & that pain being what pushed him to the lengths he went#her sympathizing with him doesnt mean Forgiveness. it's just a potential basis for connection.#god i just keep going on about this but that person made me literally so angry#dont post ur bad takes in main tag 2k22. i dont wanna fucking read them.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
#need a bestie so bad need to send audio messages and talk and talk all day 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 tired of using this like twt im so sorry#not that on twt i was a hit but at least some ppl would always be there to give me a like to let me know they vibe w me#it's so over to me i cant believe i am like this actually. a woman gave him a lei and he simply kissed her so gently i think im about#to pass tf out#guys guys im NOT new to this i not new to HIM SPECIFICALLY but only now im being crazy abt him this is so unexpected#i actually love when i get hit by a new obsession cuz it's often so random#even my sister was asking me what triggered this entire thing and honestly i just dont know#my friend mentioned that her grandmother likes him a lot and i was like oh me too and then i came back home and blasted some tunes and#here i am i cant stop fixation on him for a second!!!#i wonder if this is gonna be brief or if my destiny is sealed with this mf#and you knwo what??? its kinda silly that he is that great while he was basically an interpreter idek if thats a word. a cover boy.#he did covers but they are all amazingly amazing??? it takes artistry to be this good i really dont get how he did all of that#believe me i feel it his voice is a force. an energetic one idk what he had in him but i feel it so much????? I DONT GET IT#i keep coming back to add tags but holy shit i just need to talk about this here otherwise it will all stay inside and i want to say it!#its like i love him bc of his voice and then when i think about him singing i like it even more cuz i think he is so attractive and for that#his voice gets even better and he gets more handsome?? its like a circle a dialectical relationship it's the fucking combo of the person and#the skill#what a motherfucker!!!!
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