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#im so sorry mom please dont feel bad for me
mxwhore · 4 months
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such a horrible day couldnt have ended any other way
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kimmkitsuragi · 5 months
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whew haha
#🗒#my mom is like 'ok it's set let's tell everyone' and im like 😭😭😭😭 !!!!!#are u sure!!!! are u sure it's set like ???? 😭😭😭#ughhhhhh after this much trust i will literally kill myself if i dont get ANY scholarship lmaooooo#but also like. is it set now!!!! really !!!!!!! is it !!!!!#(excited but horrified and anxious)#like. like like like........ like i mean#um........ for real now? like are we sure for sure ??#i honestly will be like 100% on my way to [redacted] and still be like haha. is it for real#are we sure . will this actually happen#that's. crazy man#i cant help but feel like im asking for too much again. ughhhhhhh#yes hello hi. this blog has been my main outlet for emotional breakdowns about the same subject for um#(checks notes) a few months now. truly is anyone else bored of this ? because im so over it#but also like. things just dont get clear !!!!!! ever !!!!!#how can i be sure how can anyone be sure that i will actually be going lmfaooooo#i hate this waiting period i hate it why cant i know if i got anything or nah. but please don't say nah#ughhhhhh . alright. whatever it's not like i care that much honestly -_-#(threatens to kill self every day a few times over this btw)#anyway um let's. be positive#it will go great tomorrow 🤩 they will want to give me money sooooo bad 😍#and i will receive an email this week 🤗 about the wait list thing for SURE 🥳#i am doing amazing dont worry guys. im sooooo chill rn#Sorry for the constant embarrassing personal posts lol
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Prior to sending the ask I was just guessing what matrophobia meant based on the root words but I looked it up after and went ohhhh and then you confirmed that extra dimension to it and I went OHHHHH
I think that gets to the heart of what I've been thinking about, that bittersweetness, because despite his best efforts... of course he could never end up anything like Yoko, but he still ended up with an abusive "household." Because in addition to Masato ending up how he did, he has to see those same situations play out, feel that same tension in the air between Jo and Ichi, over and over for almost a decade straight.
Like, in a way, he's forced to put himself in Toshio's shoes when that happens. He can't really get through to Jo, in the same way Toshio can't get through to Yoko, but he can try to step in before lasting damage is done, and he can try to make it bearable for his son. You know. Have a nice talk. Treat him to Peking duck. I'm SO normal about the (drawn-out) parallels of those scenes
So then with Jo... he kind of does become his father, even if he never wanted to (no one wants to), both through his ruinous neglect of Masato at birth and through how he comes to look at discipline and corporal punishment. I'm sure it's not lost on him in Masato's case (owww), but with Ichi, it's not like he has any reason to see him as his son... But How Far Can That Take You.
Because it's like, at the start, he was openly beating Ichi in front of Arakawa and not letting up much when Arakawa intervened. But then you have The Yubitsume Scene and Arakawa walking in on All That and... he looks sorry. Sorry for being caught, probably, but sorry nonetheless. Like... what changed between then and now... have you two had a Heartfelt Conversation... do you know where Arakawa got that scar... are you unable to change your "nature" even then...
Side note bro your SHOE is the size of his TORSO I promise you do not need to kick him with all the strength you've got like what the hell is this 😭😭😭
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BUT ALL THAT ASIDE thank you so much for delving into the symbolism! Wonderful read. I don't really have an eye for symbolism, so that makes it all the more enjoyable to revisit the comic and everything with what you've gone into. I think a lot of your experiences resonate with mine, so conversely I'm not sure what others would take away from it, BUT I think there's enough there that's so insightful and evocative that it's effective without personal experience. I don't think there's anything I could add, so. Yeah. For once I am happy to sit back and take it all in... On that note, definitely looking forward to your next comic!
AUUUGH YEAAAH YEAHEYA HYEAH THAT EXACTLY OUUUGH OWIEE OWW.....
that's literally it though. like no extra notes. except The Obligatory Few i dont think it was an accident that arakawa is set up as the beginning of the game's 'protagonist' and planting that 'troubled family' taste first thing in our mind. i remember how i felt when i first saw arakawa walk in on jo and ichi and then arakawa taking ichi out for dinner i was just like🧍‍♂️Girl No The Cycle.... It's Continuing...... //screams// LIKE UGH IT WAS SO GOOD BUT ALSO OWWW STOPPP and then on the REPLAY it just hurts more cause with the added context to jo's character its like Oh No...... You're Your Father's Son....
and youre right: jo doesn't have an implicit reason to see how he treats ichi is wrong, hence he similarly doesnt have any reason to stop- not unless arakawa intervenes of course (and i will stand outside my window thinking of the possibility arakawa ever did try to have A Conversation with jo... arms folded behind my back and all like Man™️....)
oh but yeah, absolutely no problem ! im lowkey of an egotist so i do like to talk bout the stuff i make. More In Depth (though thats obvious considering the fuckin essays in the tags i always leave ☠️☠️) gerjlgaELKjg. so i was happy to explain ♪(´▽`) !! what i like about symbolism is that it can be intentional or not, and the fun is always finding it just by chance. i cant explain it properly, but i just think its a neat 'seasoning' of sorts to drawings (❁´◡`❁)
#long post#snap chats#everyone in rgg got flipper shoes i stg tho like evey time i look at everyones renders i gotta point it out to myself 😭#speaking of. The Cycle. and Personal Experiences. arakawa walkin in on jo and ichi esp hits cause thats def a thing thats happened to mysel#its insane how one woman terrorizes my whole family but no cause i remember my mom would tear me a new one. Metaphorically#or she'd be pissed at my sis and i and my sis would just take us out for lunch and we'd talk bout it#Unsurprisingly my dad would do that for me growin up and he was there#i used to visit him on weekends when he lived nearby and those were my Peking Duck dinners in a sense#he'd just do his best to make sure i felt at home and making sure. i was cared for for once LMAO#so yeah to see that repeat in my family with my sister taking the role of my dad its like ow...#OH YEAH NO ITS BEEN A HOT YEAR SINCE I SAID HOW HARD IT WAS FOR ME TO GET THROUGH THE BEGINNING OF Y7 HUH#it hurts a lot to watch masumi's backstory since it's EXTREMELY personal and hits too close to home but i watch it anyway 🥴#probably the first and only time a piece of media can actually 'trigger' me that badly i guess. how lame#i think ive updated my villain origin story enough tho. im sorry you also had a shit mom If Im Assuming Right#i wish it was easy to deal with bad parents but. well. if it was we wouldnt have them amiright#the best i can do is vent how i feel and at least try to have people in similar situations as me feel. understood. as corny as that sounds#its a little heinous to say Im Glad Our Experiences Are Similar cause id never wish my experiences on anyone else#but i guess i mean to say im glad we can understand each other in that regard#on a semi-better note. please dont hope for the comic anytime soon i only just finished sketching set pieces ( ´◡` ;;;)#I GOT DISTRACTED AGAAAINNNNN also its very cold and i dont work well in the cold. s'cause my fingers get all stiff EW#but i WILL have this one done i have too many abandoned projects i aint abandoning another one#with that in mind its funny you mention arakawas scar cause i did have a tiny baby thing in mind with it#nothing sad or serious this time just somethin cute even. if THAT ever happens we'll see it but yeah. just another funny case of Timing#alright bye bye for now i should work on this. after i answer your second ask HANG ON ILL SEE YOU THERE--
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kajiimotojiiro · 2 years
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Ugh
#im going to ramble in these tags for a bit so that the potentially triggering tags#are located way way way down and no one will look at them i just#so uh yeah hows the weather anyone else having insane sinus drainage#i actually had a patient call me today worried because her nose was running and her head hurt and im like#well if it isnt getting worse and its only been a few days and you have no other symptoms you probs have sinus issues like everyone else#in this state but if youre super worried and antihistamines dont help please contact your doctor i appreciate your faith in a pharmacist#being able to diagnose over the phone but i actually legally cannot do that#are these tags long enough yet#possibly but who knows anyway if youre here uhhh tw animal death ahead#im a petsitter and have been for like. 10 years now and i share sits with my mom sometimes bc i work full time and cant always get there#anyway at one of our shared sits today she went in and one of the little cats was just#suddenly dead. like she wasnt that old and yet she was just. stiff and gone and we're both just so fucked up over it#like i wish there had been some sign and we could have saved her even though it was likely an unfixable heart defect#and her people apparently had taken her to the vet LAST WEEK and didnt bother to tell us that she seemed to be feeling poorly last week#and theyre just like oh we'll get a new cat when we come back#meanwhile my ocd has been going insane since then bc i have really bad intrusive thoughts centering on keeping my cats alive#like half of my rituals are specifically for my cats#and i just keep think about poor sammie dying alone and scared bc we werent there with her and her people had been gone since friday#and it just makes me so fucking sad my heart is breaking but i cant stop thinking about it and no distractions are working#rip sammie you were such a sweet little cat and im so sorry you had to go alone and scared
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sensitivegoblin · 21 days
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Vent
Tw: sewerslide and SH
#....i really miss being 4yrs without a care in the world and my family loved each other so purely#fuck its not fair that she does this to me#im shaking over how upset this is making me#i cant always be the one at fault thats IMPOSSIBLE and not fair#she sees it as im lazy n dont like being told to do stuff#i see it as she literally picks on me everytime her health anxiety gets to her or her fiance......i watch it happen like fuckin clockworm#but im the bad guy im the lazy emotional youngest sibling whos life was sooooooo perfect cus mom n dad treated me different#I WAS HIGHLY AUTISTIC#im sorry that you wanna feel special so you gotta pretend my life was just so great cus i got extra attention#I NEEDED EXTRA ATTENTION#Dad did his best to make us all feel equal and you know thst#i du no im jjst fucking done with the littlw comments#i read over my dads shoulder so i already knew but my sister brought up what he said to her before sending me here since the waters broke#he said “please dont say anything to her she has enough on her plate”#and she just got all snippy with me about it#....i literally came to your house with 3 big slashes on my arm when do i get a fucking break from the picking????#next time ill do both my arms maybe then shell have nice emptions for me#im literally frozen in my seat sweating cus of how upset im trying not to bw#its very rare she has a soft moment with me and she completely ignores my scars or my mental health#shes now crying in the other room......#like....i dont even know what to do abymore its not fair im always the bad guy#i shouldnt have to deal with a shitty attitude ontop of the other stuff i got going on#its like shes allowed to stab me but i even react to the pain suddenly im a horrible person#its times like these i just wanna end myself cus im tired of trying so hard and having no one to unmask with#im constantly performing for other people only to not get the same energy back im SO tired#update: i escaped#i love my sister but when shes struggling she acts bitchy towards me and thats not fair#literally did the oppisite of what my dad asked her lmao#i bet she stopped crying and is now finding any lil mistake to bitch about#now im blasting sad music into my ears in hopes of not spiraling
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gyusrose · 6 months
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➵ you’re so vain -> l.hs
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⚠︎ smut (mdni)
✎ jock!heeseung x reader, enemies to ?????, heeseung is rlly annoying, hate sex ;), hair pulling, dirty talk, unprotected sex, degradation, backshots lmao. i think that’s it?
summary: attending a new school was supposed to be a fresh start for you, trying to be nice to everyone and have new friends, yet coming across lee heeseung threw all of that out the window.
(heeseung x fem.reader)
wc: 3.2k
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your sweaty hands could not be gripping the steering wheel any harder. you wouldn’t call yourself “super shy” but when it comes to a whole new community of people, teenagers, hell yeah you are.
you had to move exactly at the middle of the year due to your mom’s work. they offered her double the salary at the other side of the city, who was she to say no to that? although you were going to miss your friends and the overall environment of your old home, you couldn’t just tell your mom ‘no’, either way her decisions are final.
you just got here two days ago, and to be honest, it wasn’t that bad. the worst thing so far is the fact that the nearest shopping center was 30 minutes away but you’ll live.
you didn’t except your first day of school to be so nerve-wracking. surely you’ll make some friends but who knows what people are like here. eventually, you saw the big navy blue sign with your school’s name on it. it was an averagely big school, bigger than your old one, which also meant more people.
the parking space alone was scary. it was huge yet already full even though it was still fairly early. you went around in circles around the parking lot, trying to find a vacant spot. fortunately you did at the second-to-last line.
as you tried to park, the limited space you had made it difficult to, having to back up and drive in constantly. as you reversed your car, you must have completely forgotten that you aren’t the only one there, feeling a small crash at the bumper of your car.
your eyes widened in panic. you looked back to see what you hit, and with your luck, it revealed at very nice black car, to which you’ve just hit. you tried to quickly get into your parking spot, hoping it was nothing serious, but then someone came walking up to you.
‘shit, that must be the owner’ you saw his red, rather handsome, fuming face.
you got out of your car to confront the first person interaction.
“hey look im so-“
“CANT YOU FUCKING DRIVE RIGHT? YOU HIT MY VERY EXPENSIVE CAR WITH YOUR THING, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?”
oh he was an asshole. you almost scoffed in his face. who does he think he is.
“it was accident that’s all, it was barely a scratch calm down man.”
“IT WAS DEFINITELY A SCRATCH LOOK AT IT! JUST BECAUSE YOU KEEP YOUR CAR LOOKING ALL MISERABLE DOESNT MEAN I WILL, DO YOU EVEN HAVE A LICENSE?”
lord take me back. you were so close to just leaving him there arguing with himself. but you didn’t want to make him even angrier.
“look im sorry! i can pay for the fix up if that’s what you want, i dont know what else to do?”
the boy scoffed and rolled his eyes at your statement.
“you think i don’t have the money for it? please, it shows you’re a newbie around here.”
“i didn’t mean it like that-“
“yo heeseung!! come on bro!” another blonde boy called from afar, hopefully ending the argument y’all were having.
“ watch your back new girl.” with one last glare, he left to join his group of friends.
you rolled your eyes. shiver my fucking timbers, you thought.
you took a deep breath before grabbing your backpack and making your way into school , hoping to never see his face ever again.
>>
you thought that was going to be the end of it all. but oh boy were you wrong. soon you found out that heeseung is the captain of the football team, and pretty much the most popular boy in school. as cliche as it sounds, every girl would drop their panties if he asked them to.
people know he’s not the nicest person ( an asshole) yet they still look up to him. that’s angered you. how are all these people so dumb? just because he’s kinda good-looking? seriously?
over the course of a few weeks, you’ve managed to make some friends, your closest taehyun and Isa. although you tried to block the negativity, heeseung made it really hard. always giving you snarky comments when he saw you around, ridiculing you in front of other people. somehow always finding a way to run into you despite not having any classes together. except gym.
“ bro open your eyes, catch the damn ball!” he yelled from across from you.
you hated sports. even less could you play one, but you gotta do it for the grade.
“the ball was too high up dummy!” you retorted, rolling your eyes for maybe the 100th time in the class period.
if you hated gym before, you definitely hated it more now.
as the period ended, you decided to take a quick shower in the locker rooms since you couldn’t handle being all sweaty and gross throughout the day.
heeseung finished changing and was outside the locker room with his friends, chatting, waiting for the bell to ring. that’s when he may have accidentally eavesdropped the conversation between your two friends, he could barely the names of.
“where’s _____?” taehyun asked isa, noticing how you weren’t with her.
“she’s taking a shower right now, she told us to not wait for her.” Isa shrugged before taehyun nodded.
a beautiful idea popped in heeseung’s brain. it was too good.
he excused himself and sneakily waited by the girl’s locker room, waiting for everyone to come out. once he only heard the shower you were using running, he quietly entered the room. the bell had rang about a minute ago, so the gym was empty, only you and him. the gym teacher god knows where.
he saw his target and rapidly grabbed the pile of clothes sitting on the bench, a smirk evident in his face.
suddenly the shower stopped running, making heeseung hurry and exit the locker room.
the shower felt too good, you think you spent more time that you anticipated to. as you exited the shower tiles, you looked around for your clothes, which you remember clearly leaving them in the bench closest to the shower. you looked around the whole locker room, hoping you were wrong and placed them elsewhere. unfortunately, you couldn’t even find your damn socks.
your biggest fear has come true. you’re now naked, nothing but a towel covering you, this was more than just humiliating. you felt sad, mad, angry, embarrassed all at once. they’ve been stolen for sure, and you were more than sure on who did it.
grabbing your phone you called Isa, to see if she could help you somehow. and she indeed did. bringing you some spare clothes she had. thankfully, you always bring extra underwear since situations like these could happen. you just had to wait for isa for the clothes, yet the five minutes she took felt like five hours. unfortunately, passing period is over, meaning some students are coming in the locker room to change.
many of them just straight up stared at you. giving you weird looks as to why you were pretty much naked in the middle of the locker room, but none had the guts to ask you.
you wished the ground would just swallow you whole. lee heeseung won’t hear the end of it.
“LEE HEESEUNG!” you yelled across the field. he and his friends were siting down eating lunch outside when you spotted him after trying to find him after the stunt he just pulled.
heeseung knew it was coming, giggling with his friends as they heard you yell his name once again. “ oh she’s about to scold me now .” heeseung scoffed but still got up and went over to you.
“yes ma’am?” he said with a smile, you wish you could slap off but you’re better than that.
“YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID DO YOU KNOW HOW EMBARRASSING THAT WAS?”
“i have no idea what you’re talking about..” heeseung tried acting innocent but failed as he just burst out laughing. you groaned, how on earth is that funny?
“cute panties by the way” he continued to laugh, not sparing a glance at your mad expression on your face.
“you’re such an ass, i hate your guts.” you said leaving him alone, laughing to himself.
“yo bro i think she actually got mad this time.” his friend, jake came over.
heeseung shrugged. “she’s so sensitive, it wasn’t even that bad.”
“i can’t believe he did that…” taehyun said as you told them both what had happened. Isa knew a little bit but not who did it.
“that’s fucked up, what’s he got against you so much?”
you shrugged. “i guess because i gave his car a little scratch, but i guess he took it to heart since he hasn’t stopped bothering me since. he’s a jerk.”
“finally someone who thinks the same as me!” taehyun said making you chuckle.
“then get back at him! you know the one thing that makes him who he is is that damn football.” Isa said.
you tried to be the bigger person this whole time, not paying much mind to his little remarks or pranks he pulls, biting back a little wouldn’t hurt right?
“you know what, you’re right.”
“lee heeseung, mrs. park wants to speak to you.” mr.jung said calling heeseung.
heeseung who was barely paying attention heard his name. his frowned at this. what on earth could she want to talk about with him? either way, he went to her classroom.
he entered the empty classroom to find his coach and mrs.park, waiting for him. what the fuck? heeseung was more confused now. maybe they were going to congratulate him for the good work this semester? his coach’s face said otherwise though.
“there you are, you may be wondering why you’re here..” mrs.park started. heeseung nodded, feeling uneasy.
“a student came forward, showing how you copied word for word her whole assignment, the one i assigned a week ago. i didn’t notice it at first but it’s very clear now, you may know how cheating is unacceptable in my class, i’ve decided to fail you in this assignment, plus you’ll be serving detention this whole week..” she turned to the coach.
heeseung’s heart started beating at a rapid pace, he’s never been caught cheating, and being failed on the assignment that was a big part of his grade, it means he’s most likely failing the class now. the rules for football stated that all players should be passing all of their classes if not, they’ll be dropped….
no no no, the lee heeseung can’t be dropped. he’s the captain! the star player!
“since you’re failing this class heeseung, i think you know what’s about to happe-“
“please coach! don’t kick me out, i’m the captain! what would the team do without me? i’ll get my grade up as soon as possible im-“
“calm down calm down, i’m not going to kick you out, it’s the middle of the season, but unfortunately you won’t be playing the next three games. if your grade is not up by then, then i will drop you. understood?” his coach stated earning a sharp nod by heeseung.
he’s glad he’s still on the team but what’s the point if he can’t play? he’s going to become a joke. the captain that’s a bench warmer. how stupid.
he left the classroom enraged. he knows exactly who did this.
“bro what? what do you mean you ain’t gonna play ?” riki said in disbelief at what his captain just said.
“some snitch told mrs.park that i cheated on the last assignment and coach suspended me for the next three games, and i got detention all week!” sunghoon unknowingly chuckled. heeseung looked at him with a glare.
“what? she got you good, what did you expect hee?” sunghoon kept laughing, making some of the others also laugh silently.
heeseung had nothing to say back, he just rolled his eyes. “tch, whatever.”
nevertheless, you were overjoyed seeing heeseung slouching on the bench. you couldn’t miss this once in a lifetime scenario. obviously you were the cause for it. heeseung asks Isa almost all the time for her notes or to straight up copy her. she willingly let you rat him out after what he did to you.
he can sense how all eyes were on him, but he just tried to block everyone out a focus on the game. he had a poker face on, but deep inside he was irritated . he saw how you were smirking and laughing with your two little friends. you knew what you were doing.
>>
“ahh look who it is, the benchwarmer! “ you said chuckling as you made your way to heeseung.
after the team (barely) won, jake threw an ‘after party’ at his house. even though you don’t normally go to these parties, especially from those boys, you felt like a party would do good with your marvellous mood. something about seeing heeseung’s frowny face made feel over the moon.
“seems like cat got your tongue now huh? dont have anything to say-“
in a blink of an eye you were pulled into a room, heeseung’s fingers wrapped around your neck, pulling your face closer to his.
“what the fuck? heeseung-“
“shut the fuck up.” his hoarse voice caught you off guard. he was actually really mad.
“you think what you did it’s fucking funny? huh? almost getting me kicked out ? “ you’ve never seen him this enraged before. making you almost scared, yet….kinda turned on? no, you hate him, snap out of it! you told yourself yet the wetness in between your legs became hard to ignore.
you didn’t respond. “fuck, you’re so annoying, i can’t fucking stand you. i hate you.” he saw lowly. fuck that was hot.
you spoke before thinking. “then show me.”
not needing to tell him twice, heeseung pulled you completely in. your lips met in a kiss that was anything but gentle, a fierce and consuming clash that spoke longing and raw need.
The kiss deepened, fueled by an unspoken urgency, their mouths exploring each other with a fervor that left y’all breathless. his grip on your neck becoming tighter.
“shit im gonna show you to fucking behave.” he said before pushing you into the bed forcefully. you may have discovered a new kink of yours. watching as he undressed himself and yourself rapidly. feeling his anger through every touch he gave you.
he rubbed through your folds before inserting two fingers aggressively. your body jolted at the sudden move.
“holy shit go softer dumbass.”
“aw you think i give a fuck? suck it up and take it since you think you’re all that.” his fingers pumped faster and faster making it hard for you to answer back to his stupid remarks.
“oh my god..” you tried to pull his hand away before you cum. not wanting to see you orgasm so easily yet.
“just fuck me already heeseung, or is your dick as tiny as your brain?”
heeseung looked darkly at you. that stupid mouth of yours can’t shut up will it?
he retracted his fingers put of you and took his boxers off. wanting nothing more than to prove you wrong.
shit. your eyes went wide at what stood in front of you. saying he was big was an understatement. it was like a zipper for your mouth. how was that thing going to fit inside of you?
“can’t say anything now, can you slut?” he pulled your legs down the mattress to have you at the perfect angle to ram into you.
heeseung ran his til over your folds, teasing his way in. making you aggrevated.
“just put it in for fucks sake!”
“tell me how bad you want it.” you shook your head, no way were you going to beg. no way.
“alright then, i guess im gonna go.” he said letting go of your waist, acting as if he was going to leave.
“okay okay! please fuck me, i want it so bad, i want your big cock so bad heeseung.” heeseung moaned at your words. he didn’t wait any longer and thrusted all of him in you.
you both moaned yet it was more painful for you. you’ve never had something so big inside you before.
“fuck yeah..” he said then grabbing your neck, slightly choking you. your hands went to his biceps, trying to find something to hold on to as the speed he was thrusting in became more hostile.
“fuck me harder, like the asshole you are.” you said in between breaths. heeseung took the challenge and thrusted violently. the skin slapping and wetness of your core could probably be heard in the party outside.
“of course a whore like you would like to be fucked like this.”
before you could respond he pulled out of you earning a desperate groan from you, but then your were flipped, now on all fours and before you knew it he was back in you again. gripping your hip with one hand while he pulled your hair on the other.
“such a tight pussy, you probably fantasized about this am i right?” he said in your ear. you shook your head through your moan.
“in your dreams lee, in your fucking dreams. fuck you.”
“i’m quite literally doing that.” chuckling, he let go of your hair and instead gripped your other hip, going in deeper, nudging your cervix literally driving you to an edge.
“fuck i’m cumming.” you cried out. never has an orgasm felt like this. heeseung was on edge as well, feeling you clench around his dick did it for him.
your climax rose over you, making you fall into the pillow while heeseung kept thrusting until his own organs came over him, pulling out and releasing his white ropes all over your back.
tiredly, he laid besides you in the strangers bed, not knowing what to say now.
you turned to him, smirking. “i think i may hate you even more now.”
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poppy-metal · 3 months
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the reader dbf patrick stepdaddy art is DIABOLICAL and i need it RIGHT NOW actually. crying on patricks cock for the first time while art watches like, "im sorry, daddy, 'm sorry, just wanted it so bad, so so badly, you understand, right, you get it?" and the funny thing is, he totally does, because its patrick, yes, he gets it, more than anything he gets it, but this is wrong, isn't it? this is wrong and fucked up and evil, but you're reaching for his belt with wide, wet eyes, begging, "can make it up to you, daddy, can make you feel real good, please, 'm sorry, let me show you how sorry i am" and his resolve just has to crumple.
(obviously there has to be about six million years of YEARNING in between but you know. the horny.)
-kit ♡♡♡
@gamesetart ur sick for enabling me. i slowed things down a little bc i was cooking but the outcome will probably eventually be this. LMAO
under a cut because like patrick, this is sending me straight to hell i fear.
skipping ahead a million years just to fuck stepdad!art who also happens to be patricks ex who hes never gotten over and has been friends with this whole time - maybe its his fault actually, that you fall in love with patrick at the tender age of 14 - because art loves him so much. hes around so much. like father like daughter, right? he might not be your dad by blood but he is in every other way that counts - he has full custody - your mom been out of the picture for awhile now. its almost like having two dad, growing up. you think art and patrick are closer than any two men you've seen before. but they date other women so you don't think much of it - you want art to be happy again. you dont blame him for leaving your mother, you're just happy he took you with him.
anyway - falling for patrick is inevitable - it burns inside you like a wildfire you have no chance of stopping, so you dont try.
and patrick..... maybe he's given up hope on art after all these years. they'd had something brief and tangible in college - but it'd fizzled out - art had pretended it didn't happen. and patrick loved art too much to press the issue. he'd been content to live forever being arts best friend and nursing a flame for him that would never be returned.
and then you'd come along - it'd been hell watching art get married - he never liked that bitch, anyway, for more reasons than sharing arts bed. she treated her kid like dirt. art even worse. it got to a point where the only reason art was staying around was for you - he couldn't leave you. you were just a kid. and art had only been with you for three years but it was enough. enough for him to love you. enough for him to martyr himself for you and stay in an unhappy marriage if it meant he could play the role of daddy for you.
it may have been him who planted the seed. he'd met you a few times by that point, but he remembers a pool party where you'd been sucking on a lollipop as you watched art work the grill - your mother somewhere inside - you were twelve then - old enough to have some brain cells, patrick figured.
"he'd make a good dad, dont you think?" he'd nudged you. "i mean look at him - already rocking the dad stance with a fucking polo to match. he'll be telling us it looks like a storms rollin' in any second now."
and you'd popped the lolly out of your mouth and showed him your teeth with your smile.
a raised brow. "really? does he know that? does your mother?"
"he already is my dad, though."
you'd frowned. stuck the lolly back in your mouth. he could tell he'd given your brain alot to think about that.
it was only a year later that the divore was finalized. and art was granted full custody of you as his daughter - full guardianship. patrick got him the hell out of that town shortly thereafter.
and that was it, really. that was the plan. just to live in peace. he didn't expect to grow so attached to you. to enjoy watching you grow up. to enjoy being there for your important milestones. he saw a bit of himself in you, too, that wild precociousness. that want to run free. saw how it fucking terrified art, who wanted nothing but the best for you after the life you'd had. always the hero.
so yeah, when you'd started your rebellious teen phase he'd helped you hide it. picked you up from parties when you couldn't drive home instead of calling your dad. because he didn't want to see art unhappy. he didn't want to see art look at you and see the patrick in you and hate it. he couldn't.
he didn't know you'd fall in love with him. he didn't.
and when he realized you had, he'd pushed you away. he had.
but the thing is - as much as you had patrick in you - you had art as well. your inherent kindness. your sweet open face. your determination and dedication. he saw it and then he couldn't unsee it. and as long as he'd held onto his love for art he was tired. he was fucking tired of being unloved and unwanted and here you were - a tether to art - his beautiful babygirl - and you were throwing yourself at him. loving him. wanting him. so fucking beautiful and innocent - just like art had been, all those years ago.
couldn't fault him for caving. he'd faught it, but patricks not a good man. and hes a stray dog at the end of the day, dirty and hungry and begging for scraps.
he fucking devoured you. took from you. took your virginity - just like he did your fathers - broke it on his cock and tried not to feel sick that the symbolic way your blood drenched his cock connected you and him and art in a way that was as holy and it was perverted. he fucked you and he fucked you and he fucked you. he had you whenever and wherever he wanted and he didn't allow himself to think about the consequences of it - because he was fucking greedy for it - you took everything he was and you bit into it and you bounced on his dick like he was a fucking god and he found himself falling in love all over again.
he'd find a way to tell art and make it right. he would.
but then there'd been that night when art asked him out for drinks and patrick would tell something was wrong. he'd been distant from art lately, if he was being honest, consumed completely by you. the only reason he was free was because you were at a friends.
when art had confessed he felt you pulling away the guilt had set in... because art looked so sad. so pathetic and lonely and patrick had never wanted this for art. his heart pitched and dropped in his chest and he couldn't tell art about you - not now -
and then art had looked at him and said "you know she reminds me of you -" and patricks lips had parted. the alcohol in his system warmed his blood, but so did the heavy weight of arts eyes on him. it was a look patrick hadn't seen in years. decades even.
It was how you looked at him.
hungry.
that's all patrick thought as art drew closer and closer to him. fuck, when art placed a hand on his thigh. fuck, when his cock twitched. fuck, when art said he missed those days back in college. fuck, when art leaned in and patrick didn't pull away.
fuck.
fuck again, when he came to and they were back at arts apartment - fuck when they passed your room and thank fuck you weren't home, thank fuck - fuck fuck fuck when art got on his knees and stroked patricks cock and patrick thought his first clear thought of the night -
fuck fuck and fuck again because he lost his mind a little when arts lips touched his. went a little dizzy with it.
fuck fuck fuck - because arts sinful pink mouth descended around him and he fucking moaned around it and in some twisted dark corner of patricks seedy mind he thought art must taste you on him - must know its you hes tasting and thats why he throats him deeper like a fucking whore.
i fucked her this morning. he's about to suck his daughter's pussy off my dick and he doesn't even fucking know -
patrick knows hes going to hell.
he knows it because he uses the same fingers he'd had inside your cunt to spread your dads ass open for the same dick he'd plunged into you - he knows hes going to hell because when he slides inside and art moans he thinks he sounds just as pretty as you do - they take me so fucking well - made for me - fucking made for me
and when he pulls out to come down and swallow arts cock down his own throat he moans when he thinks about kissing you later tonight with your fathers spunk on his tongue -
hes going to hell.
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diorsluv · 4 months
Text
casual , part 12
“ knee deep in the passenger seat and you’re eating me out ”
series m. list previous chapter next chapter
( socialmedia!au )
edwards.73
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edwards.73 appreciation post
tagged: yourusername
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yourusername 🥰
→ edwards.73 ❤️
rutgermcgroarty you actually did it
→ edwards.73 yea why would i not
→ rutgermcgroarty so is this like… a hard launch… ???
→ edwards.73 yeah i guess so
username18 OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GODDD
username26 YEAHHH LES GO HE DID IT
mackie.samo was this purely to spite rutger
→ edwards.73 maybe, maybe not
→ rutgermcgroarty why r we using the govt name
markestapa AYYYY
→ edwards.73 yes mark i hard launched
→ markestapa i can see that
username57 this was. shocking!!!!
username12 LOOK AT HER SHES SO CUTE HERE
adamfantilli when did this occur
→ edwards.73 right now
→ adamfantilli did she even know you two had a label
→ edwards.73 she labeled us first i just never corrected her 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️
→ mackie.samo yikes
→ luca.fantilli uhhh
→ rutgermcgroarty 😬😬😬
→ dylanduke25 thats not really…
→ edwards.73 what
→ edwards.73 is that not a good thing???
colecaufield this got less cute as i read more and more comments
→ edwards.73 i’m confused
vivianliu doesn’t seem very appreciative
trevorzegras YEAHHH KID
liked by edwards.73
username46 good thing happened from bad intentions
username70 oh look it’s a hard launch
username35 oh…
lhughes_06 i have no words
_quinnhughes nope don’t like this one
jackhughes 🙃
_alexturcotte iiiiiii don’t know how to feel about this
username64 these comments r very… not as lively as they should be
username79 🥳🥳
yourusername
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yourusername blue days for the blue gals 💙
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luca.fantilli ur caption makes no sense
→ yourusername blue = sad
→ luca.fantilli ur sad???
username28 personally i think you should drop him
username16 would now be a good time to exercise my weekly #RUTSUPREMACY privileges
liked by yourusername
→ username35 oh my god she liked the comment
vivianliu YOU NEED A YELLOW DAY. BECAUSE YELLOW = HAPPY. BLUE - BLUE + YELLOW = HAPPY.
→ yourusername i had an aneurysm reading that
→ vivianliu i had an aneurysm writing it
→ vivianliu BUT REGARDLESS IM STILL RIGHT AND U KNOW IT
→ yourusername mmm
→ vivianliu please babe i just want to see you smile again
lhughes_06 did he make u sad.
→ yourusername hi lukey
→ lhughes_06 im taking that as a yes
→ lhughes_06 next time i see that little shit someone’s gonna have to hold me back
→ vivianliu luke! you. don’t. know. how. to. fight????
→ lhughes_06 HOLD ME BACK
username61 awww the outfits are cute
username57 our little fashion queen ⁉️
rutgermcgroarty how about instead of moping we go have a little best friends day at mini golf
→ yourusername im not moping 🤬
→ vivianliu you’re both getting destroyed
→ rutgermcgroarty vivi we all know what your golfing skills are like
→ yourusername rut come pick me up in an hour
→ vivianliu u cant putt for shit dont even talk to me mcgroarty
trevorzegras you’re not updating me on any of this
→ yourusername IM SORRY TREV
→ trevorzegras don’t call me don’t text me 😕😕
username81 girl i need u as my personal stylist
→ username50 FR
adamfantilli i fw those blue pants
→ yourusername ofc you do
→ adamfantilli wdym by that 😢😢
→ yourusername nothing but i am surprised that u didn’t bring up the blue jacket
→ yourusername 😉😉😉😉😉😉
→ adamfantilli you’re not funny
→ luca.fantilli she’s pretty funny
_quinnhughes isn’t that mom’s old skirt
→ yourusername yeah why 🤨
→ _quinnhughes just wondering
→ jackhughes he thinks it looks good on u rosie
→ yourusername AWWW thanks guys ☹️☹️
username5 i’ve never seen someone so pretty before oh my god
colecaufield i’m ready to square up if you need me
→ yourusername oh god
→ colecaufield gonna give that douche a knuckle sandwich 🤬
→ _alexturcotte why are you so violent all of a sudden
→ trevorzegras you punched a wall turcs shut up
edwards.73 why
→ yourusername idk
→ edwards.73 ok
username16 UR SO PRETTY HE DOESNT DESERVE U
jackhughes i told you 10 times be careful with him
→ yourusername will he do what it takes to survive??
→ jackhughes please not again
→ markestapa is that what i think it is
→ mackie.samo is it that one play with the man bun guy
→ luca.fantilli DID SOMEONE SAY HAMILTON
→ rutgermcgroarty no one said hamilton
→ dylanduke25 I HOPE THAT YOUUUUU
→ yourusername BURNNNNNNNN
next chapter notes ) i haven’t updated this in a week guys am i cooked?!?! wanna start that rut au so badly but i don’t want it to flop and i also don’t wanna put another au on hold 😔😔
tags: @dancerbailey3 @hughesfein @loveforaugust @alwaysclassyeagle @love4ldr @inhoodmood @bunting58 @crazycat-ladys-blog @smoooore @bunbunbl0gs @lilasianmeat
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itsjustaninchident · 1 year
Note
I feel like an interesting prompt for Lando would be being with/meeting a girl he likes who isn’t an influencer or popular, just a regular girl who stays more private. (Me for example, a girl who lives in the middle of no where Texas, with a regular business office 9-5 job) lol
You Are in Love
Lando Norris x Interior Designer!Reader
socmed au
summary: seems like mclaren's driver is not available in the market anymore but the real question is, to whom?
warning/s: none
author's note: hello! I am so sorry for taking so long to respond to this request 😭 I didn't know how I would create this and I am still quite scared to take requests but here we are and I hope you enjoy it! A little warning I'm not very knowledgeable about America so I might have overlooked some things and I am sorry for that 😭 and also lmk~ I also chose interior designer as the career for the reader I hope you don't mind >< 🫶 Please request more!
Part 2
yourusername
Texas, USA
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liked by yourbestfriend, yoursibling, and 129 others
yourusername another tiring week but at least i get to be a passenger princess hehe :)
view 10 comments...
yourbestfriend tell him to watch his back i CAN take you back 😏
yourusername dont worry bae im all yours 😉
yourfriend is this the london boy 🫢
yourusername well...
yourfriend when will we meet him👀
yourusername he's a little shy😆
yoursibling mom says she miss him more than u
yourusername i guess i have been replaced in the family now
landonorris
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liked by maxfewtrell, carlossainz55, and 320,478 others
landonorris another normal but lovely week
view 1,093 comments...
user1 this is so out of character of him😭
user2 fr why is this kinda lowkey of him to do though👀
user3 am i thinking what you're thinking
user4 is he yknow the d word 😭
user7 okay pack it up people he can have a life that does not concern us at all
danielricciardo 🤠
user9 what's with the emoji
maxfewtrell when will u be back here
user5 oh OH
user6 since when are you interested in architecture 🧐
user6 trying to connect shit...
user7 no you're not go get a life
user8 baes take all your delusional asses elsewhere 😭
yourusername
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liked by yoursibling, yourbestfriend, and 218 others
yourusername golf isn't as bad as i thought
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yourbestfriend am i really about to lose you to some guy who drives in circles???
yourusername nah still urs babe 😆😘
landonorris
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landonorris golf kinda day
view 305 comments...
maxfewtrell you got beaten up bad...
landonorris she was just lucky
maxfewtrell sure...
carlossainz55 i guess ill replace you as my golf buddy
user1 why are his pictures so boyfriend coded lately?
yourbestfriend that's really a nice pic i wonder who took it? 🫢
yourusername 🤐
user2 the comments from max and carlos😭 who's able to beat this man in golf😭 i need to pay my respect
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yourusername
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liked by lilymhe, yourbestfriend, and 137 others
yourusername fun week in canada :)
view 6 comments...
yourbestfriend I should've went with you!
yourusername definitely! 😭 It will be so much more fun with u around luv :'(
lilymhe hope to see you again !
yourusername looking forward as well! I miss u alr 🫶
lando.jpg
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lando.jpg canada you were fun 😏
view 1,456 comments...
user1 DID HE JUST HARD LAUNCH?!
user2 I AM NOT SO READY FOR THIS
user3 i genuinely think he has no idea what he posted....
user4 LANDO WHO'S THAT IN THE 3RD PHOTO
danielricciardo mate I think you're not supposed to post the 3rd photo...
carlossainz55 she will definitely kill him
maxverstappen1 im here for it
maxfewtrell so much for being lowkey
this post has been deleted
lando.jpg
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lando.jpg canada you were fun 😏
view 5,405 comments...
user1 no way you're trying to gaslight us
user2 man really said nope not today
danielricciardo i saw nothing
carlossainz55 me too
maxverstappen1 me three
user3 twitter fans gonna have a field day with this 😭
to be continued...
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bumblinv · 2 years
Note
Hi! Are your requests open? If they are I'm just gonna leave this here, Neteyam, Ao'nung, Lo'ak (sperate) x OmaticayaGnReader who is sick, like flu for the na'vi or something like that, they have a fever and the chills and everything could it also be fluffy and absolutely adorable
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--- personal doctors ☆゚.*・。゚
neteyam, ao'nung, rotxo (seperated) x gn!metkayina!reader
you catch a cold, its time for your lover to take care of you
a/n ; im not good at writing lo’ak, so i bring you rotxo instead! i hope you dont mind<3
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: ̗̀➛ neteyam
realizes your sickness even before you did
when you first sneeze or cough, his mind goes straight to the day before, recalling any peculiar food you've had
neteyam would notices too, when you pause between chores to massage your forehead
he will take over cleaning. making sure every corner is clean so you won't sneeze from the dust. he also makes sure you stay hydrated and even whips you up nutritious meals until your condition got better. usually, the fever never got up to you
but when it does, he goes in full momma mode
this man grows with 3 younger siblings, caring for someone is natural for him. he would stay by your side, whispering your name every few hours to wake you up, so he could feed and help you drink
neteyam might not be the best healer, like her sister, but he can make certain herb drinks
makes you ginger tea regularly to warm up your shivering body
you tend to get all sort of nightmares from your sickness, but dont worry, you’re waking up to neteyam since he’s cuddling you all night long. he will run his slender fingers through your hair, whispering comforting words to your ear
“everything’s okay, dear. i’m here” 
we all need neteyam in our lives:(
_
: ̗̀➛ ao'ung
acts like he doesn’t care, but the moment your temperature starts to rise, he brings his mother straight to you
the tsahik would probably do nothing. she tell him to go ask kiri for some herb tea, and to make sure you drink and eat well, since fevers could heal by itself
but mans stressed
would refuse to let you lift a single muscle. he will be the one helping you change, wipe your face to keep you fresh, feeding you
since he’s not the best cook, he would ask tsireya to make you soups, wich she happily does. she makes great food, but your tongue tastes sour and your appetite is no where to be found
so ao'nung scolds you
“quit acting like a baby and please, just eat” 
you know ao’nung. none of his scolding are anger, he’s just extremely worried.
watching you go to sleep after being scolded makes him feel like a villain. he would join you in bed and whispers an apology. gently bringing you closer to his chest as the both of you fall asleep
remember he's a worrier? it makes him act too much like a mom. he will insist on taking care of you, even when you're feeling better. will only stop until he's sure you're 100% healthy
ao'nung is a big softie
_
: ̗̀➛ rotxo 
most clueless compared to the other 2
pls dont be mad, its not his fault
something tells me he’s an only child, a one that rarely got sick too, so he doesn’t know anything about caring for ill people
rotxo might be confused, but he’s not an idiot
the moment he touches your forehead and realizes you're scorching hot, rotxo instinctively wraps a fluffy blanket around you. the man will make you drink a lot of water, and went off running to the sullys
“what the fuck?” 
“sorry lo'ak! its an emergency!”
he got home with omaticayan food wraps in hand. you’re too sick to say anything, so when he lifts your head to feed you, you don’t protest
the one thing that scares you the most is that his jokes completely disappears
all his stupid jokes, gone.
not in a bad way, this man is just so dedicated on you that he stops joking around. he cannot stand that you're feeling all sick and uncomfortable and wants you back to your healthy self
this man is so serious, even when he tried feeding you raw cloves of garlic
one time, he heard kiri saying that garlics are ‘good for boosting the immune system’ 
he’s not wrong😭😭😭
but kiri hits him on the head once she founds out
instead of feeding you raw garlic, she gives you a mix of aged garlic and honey as medicine such an asian mom move
he feels bad afterwards, would kiss your entire face despite your protest
the next day, you wake up feeling fresh. but your lover boys voice got so hoarse from sore throat and complains about his sore limbs
yes, he got your fever and yes, he never regret kissing you, even when you're sick
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Miles 42 headcannons pls?
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EARTH 42 MILES MORALES HEADCANNONS
A/N: OK, I never usually write stuff like this so please correct me if I messed up on some stuff!
WARNING: I dont speak spanish so I will be using google translate, lol. However, if anyone is a translator and can help me out please do!
BE PREPARED FOR: POSSESIVENESS, BLOOD, VIOLENCE, LANGUAGE, HEAVY TOPICS (DRUGS GANGS, ETC), AND DARK+NONCHALANT MILES TELL ME IF I MISSED ANY.
Earth 42 Miles is definitely a nonchalant person in general. After his dad was taken away from him he feels like he has nothing left to say to anyone about anything. He definitely struggles in relationships with this character trait.
I like to believe he keeps girlfriends but doesn't keep the title of a player. I feel like he dates a ton of girls to fill the void of that missing love he got from his father...you know?
I also believe that most of his relationships fall out because he doesn't just swoon after the girl because like I said before he has a nonchalant behavior.
If he was to get a long-term girlfriend. He would get attached really quickly and most definitely would not play about her.
The more and more deeper yall get into the relationship the more and more possessive he gets.
He's really possessive because he feels like you will slip away from him. Like his dad did.
___________________________________________________________
Earth 42 Miles became the prowler because it is his way of acting out.
After his dad died, he slipped into a depressive episode that kept replaying, replaying & replaying. There's already enough stress on his mom with being a single parent, her job, and trying to keep the bills paid.
So him being a "bad" kid and getting into fights would not help her at all. So when Uncle Aaron introduced this job to him he was immediately in.
Killing these innocent people allows him to let out all his vexation on the city that brought his father to death.
He comes every night in bloody clothes, with purple bruises painting his brown complexion.
In all honesty, he's fucking miserable.
____________________________________________________________
Miles 42 definitely has the habit of speaking Spanglish.
Since he converses communication from his Mother to Uncle Aaron.
He definitely has A+ in Spanish. (LMFAOOOO i just thought this was funny to add in here)
Spanish is the language he speaks when he's angry
Like, for example when he's beating someone to death senselessly (im sorry i don't know how else to put this..)
He speaks Spanish in anger.
¿Dónde está el dinero, hijo de puta?
¡Deja de gritar antes de que te alimente a las ratas de la calle!
....He speaks very out of character when hes killing
______________________________________________________________
In all honesty if he had some free time on his hands he woud kill some actual bad people, like robbers,muggers, gangs...etc.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But in my opinion he's just a kid whos trying to fill a void from his dead father and he just needs love!!
______________________________________________________________
IM SORRY IF THIS SUCKS AND IF ITS SHORT! I TRIED LOL
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vampykween · 10 months
Note
Crazy idea for toxic husband simon? Lets send them to couples counselling >:]
hehe i love this idea! sorry this took so long i pondered over how to write it, but i like how it turned out! these two deserve a brief reprieve from all the angst so enjoy this little glimmer of hope <3
“i still don’t think we need to do this, love” 
“so, you’ve said. can you please just go get the kids ready to leave, im not finished getting ready.” you mentally count down from ten while leaning over the bathroom sink attempting to finish up your makeup. you know by the time you hit ten, simon will have volleyed back some comment you’re in no mood to hear. 
“’s therapy, not a fashion show. dont even get why you’re getting dolled up anyway.” he’s unbelievably predictable. 
you roll your eyes and stare pointedly in his direction. “you know if you’re trying to convince me you still love me, you should try just saying ‘wow babe you look beautiful, of course i’ll get the kids ready’.” simon squints his eyes at you as if he’s actually considering what you’re saying, huffs, and stalks off in the direction of your daughters’ room. 
maybe your husband(?) was right, this does feel stupid. you two are sitting in a far too stuffy room with plain decorations, on a too-plush couch that makes you sink further with every movement. you don't even realize the therapist is asking you something until simon places a hand on your bouncing knee, stilling it to catch your attention. your heart shouldn’t stutter at the small display of affection, but simon hadn’t touched you in so long the touch melted the icy feelings you had towards him.
the session goes far better than you had expected. you didn’t think simon would open up much, but he was a lot more willing to admit his faults than you figured he’d be. you couldn’t help but stare at him incredulously, where was this man when you two were at home? when you were begging and pleading for help with literally any and everything? a part of you starts to feel bad when simon’s revealing his feelings of depression and worthlessness, not that you’re giving him a pass for the years of transgression, but once upon a time he was your soulmate and your heartbreaks knowing he was in so much pain.
maybe you didn’t see it because you were blinded by rage, or because you were so exhausted day in and day out, you didn’t have time to think of anything other than being a mom. you both come to the realization, with the therapist’s help of course, that you were both so eager to rush into life that you never stopped to consider what that would actually look like. you wanted a baby so badly that even when things started to snowball into madness you two convinced yourselves that this was just the way it was and that it had to be worth it somehow.
as you’re both walking back to the car, you leave feeling a whole lot lighter than when you went in. sure no major hurdles were cleared. you weren’t sure when you’d be able to kiss and love on your husband again without being confronted with everything he wasn’t doing, but you two are going to take it slow and learn to listen to each other. give and take. push and pull. as you slide into the passenger seat, simon tugs gently at one of your hands and interlocks his fingers with yours.
“i know i can’t take back the past, but i’m serious about changing. i want to be better for you, for us, and for our girls.”
you’re not sure what you had expected him to say, but his words have your breath caught in your throat. you distinctly remember a time when he promised he would be good to you, and he failed. you wanted to badly to believe him now, hearing the sincerity in his voice. warring between what the angry part of you wants to say and what the hopeful part of you wants to say, you land on a simple response of “okay”
“okay?”
“yes, okay. i’m not ready to forgive you yet and i don’t know when i ever will be. but i am saying that i will try.” his eyes lock with yours and you can see the emotion brewing in them, he doesn’t offer any words back. he simply squeezes your hand three times in quick succession. i love you. maybe just maybe things will work out this time.
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cryoniide · 8 months
Note
could you do a house x male reader where reader is also struggling through a drug addiction to the point they overdose, and house wonders why they arent responding gets mad at them but then finds out reader is in the hospital due to the OD? angsty comfort? sorry im struggling at the moment and this sounds nice, i understand if its a bit too serious to write about tho
of course i can, i tried my best sorry if it isn’t exactly what you want, i can redo it if needed ^^
i’m here now
gregory house x male reader
it was monday, a universal day that was hated by everyone. why? no one really knows. but, today was a very bad day for y/n l/n. he was an employee at princeton-plainsboro teaching hospital. he was under the finest doctor there, dr. gregory house. now, no one knew why the boy wanted to work with the drug addicted sadist. no one but him. his reasoning? because him and dr. house have one thing in common. drug addiction.
for y/n, it started when he was in high school. he had a shitty childhood which continued into his teen years. only when he found drugs had he found peace. but, as the years progressed, so did his addiction. it’s gotten to the point where he doesn’t even remember a time he was sober, besides the weeks leading up to his every-6-month checkups, which were the closest thing to hell on earth.
but, why was it a shitty day for y/n? well, he had given the wrong diagnosis, and got called an idiot for almost killing a patient. he missed breakfast. got his lunch stolen by his boss. but, the worst thing of all was that there was a new patient. someone from his past. someone he never, ever, wanted to see again. his mother. when he saw her, he turned around.
‘fuck this shit.’
after that, no one saw him the whole day. it was only a few hours after y/n left when house started to get angry.
“how dare that brat leave right after we get assigned a case!” he complained to wilson, who rolled his eyes in response, “have you tried, i dont know, asking him?” wilson replied, not bothering to look up from the folder in his hand.
the whole day, house toyed with the patient to release his frustrations. to be homest, he was starting to get less angry and more worried. he made an excuse saying that y/n is the sharpest one on the team and that the rest of them can’t function without him. when, in reality, house was the one that couldn’t function. wilson was the only one who knew why house was actually worried. why? well, the two sort of have a..romantic relationship.
he tried reaching him. call after call after call, but it all went straight to voicemail. after treating the patient, house found out it was y/n’s mom. he was about to go to his lovers home, when he got a page.
‘room 202, now.’
it was from lisa. he rushed down to the room, seeing the unconscious body of his lover. he rushed to his side grabbing y/n’s hand and looking up at the cuddy. “he overdosed…on oxycodone.”
‘fuck.’ house thought.
how could he had let this slip past him? how could he have not noticed that you were suffering all this time? he wanted to beat himself up over this, but he knew you wouldn’t want that. so he waited, sitting in the chair and watching your vitals all night. he didn’t want to risk losing someone so close to him. not again.
you woke up the next day, your head pounding and your feelings all over the place. you were glad to be alive but, god you wish you weren’t. “y/n?” you turned to the voice, seeing greg sitting next to you. he looked miserable, the bags under his eyes darker than they were before. “are you okay? why didn’t you tell me?” you didn’t say anything. to be honest, you wish you could’ve told him. that you were suffering. that you wanted help. needed help. but, it wasn’t easy to admit you were an addict.
“i know it’s hard, but please, talk to me.” you looked in his eyes. he was worried. genuinely worried. right there, tears escaped your eyes, streaming down your face. he got up, wrapping his arms around you in a tight embrace. “it’s okay, y/n. i’m here, now. you’re safe, i promise.”
a/n; I HOPE THIS IS OKAY. i tried my best. again, loveeee writing angst, decided to throw in a sad lil backstory hope you dont mind and i hope you enjoyed. on a serious note, if any of you are struggling with addiction, please don’t be afraid to talk to someone and get help, even if its with a friend at first. i have a family member who’s an alcoholic, and i know it isnt the same as drugs but it hurts me to see that person going down this path. i worry that one day they aren’t gonna be here anymore and i really dont want that to be soon. so please, talk to someone, anyone, and don’t be afraid to ask for help <33 you are loved and cared for i promise
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my-brain-soup · 1 month
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I've Never Seen Luka, But Jon Kent Has
Basically I've never watched Luka but I read a fanfic where Jon gets the teen titans to watch it (parallels are drawn between Luca and Alberto and Jon and Damian) so now I will be watching it and writing the thoughts I have during it
No I will not give context and spoiler warning ig
Love the music during the studio logos
We love a superstitious king, I mean, I have a feeling he has a point
IF THEY HIT HIM IMMA BE SO PISSED
Awww, he's such a polite little guy
Luca is a farm boy!!! I love my little Jon Kent varient :)
I, too, would risk my life for shiny object
I, too, do the murder
OMG THEIR SO JON AND DAMIAN BUT LIKE BEING HUMAN IS BEING A VIGILANTE AND ITS THE SAME AS THEIR START BASICALLY I LOVE THEM
HE EVEN HAS THE SUPERMAN CURL
Dami would say he invented walking
And pretend he's not proud of Jon
THEYRE SO CUTESY
Bruno? Or Bruce...o... you get the idea
Sorry, they have Luca grab Alberto like that and expect me not to see them as the most adorable little guy love story? Their so crushing on each other
"You're so lucky your dad lets you do what you want," cue Superman's comment about Bruce getting hit on the head all the time
NO WAY THEIR SENDING HIM TO (basically) BOARDING SCHOOL TO KEEP HIM AWAY FROM THE "bad influence" THAT IS ALBERTO
Yes! Grandma, my queen!
"We can do anything" I love this movie
MY FRIEND SMELLS AMAZING
God I don't know her name yet but I love her
JULIA OR HOWEVER YOU SAY IT
We're not telling you our secrets! Tells secrets immediately.
FROM EVERYTHING YOU LOVE?????
I love Alberto so muchhhhhh
I love Mr dad human
Oh they know SOO many fish
No way everyone, including an adult, just saw that bitch rob some kids and didn't do shit
He is a sad little catfish
Why are his parents actually crazy
Aww, Alberto doesn't want to lose his friend
Noooooooo
Luca just wants to learn, and Alberto just wants to feel loved :(
How is the gayest looking dude there being homophobic?
When your new father figue wants to kill your entire species
Alberto got mad when Julia touched Luca's hand...
Why does Luca's hair looks like a croissant
NO LUCA WTF
I WAS ALMOST ON YOUR SIDE
GOD WHAT THE HELL
YES, MR DAD HUMAN, I LOVE YOU PLEASE DONT KILL YOUR NEW SON
FUCK.
IM NOT CRYING.
Nooooo
Their fort :(
BESTIE NO
NO ALBERTO MY BABY NO
STOP PUSHING PEOPLE AWAY SO YOU DONT GET HURT. IT'S NOT GONNA WORK
God the organizer adult lady us such a bitch
Why is no one concerned that the scuba kid isn't coming up for air?
Aww, his little clap self tap in
It's totally about to rain
Well shit. Sometimes I hate when I'm right
WAIT WAS THAT ALBERTO
I TAKE IT BACK I LOVE WHEN IM RIGHT
FUCK
NO I TAKE IT BACK AGAIN
I love them so much!!!!
MR DAD HUMAN NO
MR DAD HUMAN YES
YAYYYY
KING
Is the mom the same person that voiced Aunt Cass in big hero 6?
YES LOVE ME THE OLD LADIES
BRO ITS SO ABOUT BEING GAY I LOVE THIS MOVIE
I decided it is a metaphor for older lgbtq people, feeling able to come out after younger generations have proved that times have changed, I love them
(They're sisters, so they're not together, but they can still be gay!)
BRO ALBERTO
THOSE LITTLE LOOKS
YOU'RE NOT FOOLING ANYONE
JULIA 100% KNOWS
About his crush, not just Luca going to school
AHHHH HES SO SWEET
YES, MR DAD HUMAN, YOU NEED EACH OTHER
Their in love, your honor
THEIR LITTLE HAND HOLDING THING I CANT
IM SO MENTALLY ILL FOR GAY FISH
IM CRYING AGAIN
AHHH, THEY RIGHT EACH OTHER LETTERS
ALBERTO LOOKS SO SMITTEN WHEN THEY'RE ON THE PHONE
ALBERTO GETS HIS KNIFE
DOES HE BECOME A LIFEGAURD???
I love this movie
So much
DAMIAN ALSO HAS A CAT AND JON ALSO HAS A DOG
Also, here is my formal apology, her name is spelled Giulia, my b
Alberto learns to carve wood, awww
Also, does Luca EVER get shoes?
I've decided I need an Alberto to become a tattoo artist future au, at least like on the side or for fun or sm
The dedication is adorable
Yes, I just watched all of the credits. What about it?
I was rewarded with an after credits scene, so fuck you.
I'm gonna watch all the deleted scenes now, I'm not gonna specify which one so have fun guessing
Haha, they called Alberto and Luca the main relationship
BOO STOP TRYING TO GIVE LUCA A CRUSH ON GIULIA
YES! CONFORMED LUCA A GIULIA ONLY PLATONIC
YES ALBERTO CHEER ON THE KRAKEN AGAINST THE HUNTER
Also, she was almost a photographer, like TIM DRAKE?!?!?
Don't worry, Luca, I'll ride in a barrel lit on fire down a hill with you
Awww, they were raised by a lobsterrr
BRING BACK CANNED SEA MONSTER FACTORY
OH SEA MONSTER CAN PASS BUT IF THEIR FOUND OUT THE CONSEQUENCES MIGHT BE REALKY DIRE??? SOUNDS KINDA GAY TO ME.
Oh, Jon is extremely charming
I love how they used different animation styles (in how they had the characters move) on land and in the water
PH THE TRANSFORMATION ISN'T CELEBRATED IN LUCAS FAMILY AND HE MAKES IT A CONSIOUS DEASITION TO CHANGE HIS THINKING FROM I SHOULDNT DO THIS TO I SHOULD EMBRASE THIS? SOUNDS KINDA GAY TO ME
Bro, not the first version where Alberto outs Luca to Giulia, eek
And finally, Ciao Alberto!
Aww, Luca wants to see to Portorosso!
THE GAY OLD LADY SISTERS ARE DEFINITELY CLOSE WITH ALBERTO, AND I LOVE IT FOR ALL OF THEM
He finally has people who care about him!!!
AWW ALBERTO JUST WANTS MR DAD HUMAN TO BE PROUD OF HIM
Alberto, you do NOT got this
DONT LIGHT THE BOAT ON FIRE
OH SHIT
Noooo!!! Don't leave!!!
YOU'RE NOT HIS EMPLOYEE, YOU'RE HIS SON
HE CALLED HIM DAD!!!
YAY HUGS
I LOVE THEM SO MUCH
MY HEART
I CANT
I love Alberto being an artist (a bad one, for now, but still and artist)
Okay, that's it, Ciao :)
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I feel so hopeless.
I don’t think I can wait until im 18 to transition. I dont know if I can even stay alive that long. Hell I cant stand the thought of having this body for 5 more years. My mom recently told me that she wouldn’t bear to look at me anymore if I ever got an abortion or top surgery, which I know is wrong for her to believe, but it still hurts so much. I’m not even out to her yet and she’s still being transphobic towards me and honestly I didn’t think that was possible. I don’t feel like a real transgender because I can’t even decide on a name for myself. I don’t even look like a boy. The only thing I can do is bind. My transmasc friend can pass so much better than me, I feel like he gets misgendered so much less than I do, and I just think he’s so lucky. Is it wrong for me to think that? I don’t know but I’ve lost so much hope. I don’t know anything. And it just feels like no one else really gets it.
I don’t know if I can do this anymore.
I’m sorry for the heavy ask.
-Lib (maybe, still considering other names)
Hey kiddo,
I know it feels hopeless, and I've been there (and still am there sometimes ngl). Your mother doesn't sound like a very good one, if she won't support her child's decisions about what they do with their body. It's your body, so it's completely up to you what to do with it even if that means you lose your mother's support. I'd recommend you avoid coming out to your mother as I don't think it'd be a safe thing for you to do. It's hard, not being "properly" out, but it'll be worth it in the long run.
You are really trans, you aren't faking it. You're trans enough and I believe you. If you still look "like a girl", I believe you and am currently in the same situation. Some of my trans friends change their name every week, some have multiple names at once, it doesn't make them any less trans. You say you can bind, so hang onto that because that is awesome! (That being said please remember to do so as safely as possible even if you have really bad dysphoria)
Please try not to compare yourself to other trans people you know, it doesn't help. However, it isn't wrong for you to be doing that because we all compare ourselves, although we probably shouldn't. Transition is not linear and everyone's transition is different and at a different pace because everyone's situation is different. So if your transition is at a slower pace, that doesn't make you any less trans, your journey just has more turns and is a bit more complicated.
There is hope, and I know it's what everyone says but I promise it's true: it does get better. It's not going to happen overnight, but things will get easier.
You say that noone really understands, but I promise I do. I'm still a kid, with an abusive/unsupportive mother, who has a few years left until I'm an adult and will likely rely on my parents for a while longer. I haven't come out to any of my family and only some of my friends, and I still look as much like a girl as I did when I was 5 years old. I struggled for years and still do, although I think I'm recovering. There's a whole bunch more, but simply put I'm in a very similar situation to you, you're not alone I promise.
It's not hopeless, I love you and I am here for you, and I need you to stay, even though I know how tough it is. Please reach out to me whenever you need to, I would be happy to talk to you as a friend and both my messages and my inbox are always open, although I'll likely reply to messages more quickly and they won't be posted. You are so loved, and I am here for you, stay safe <3
-Sage (he/they) :)
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certifiedstarrr · 7 months
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Open Arms - Matt Sturniolo
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warnings: panic attack, kissing, use of y/n, degradation thoughts, use of pet names, & fluffy fluff
POC FRIENDLYYY !!
summary: y/n has a panic attack because she was petrified of falling behind and disappointing people around her. Not wanting to be to annoying or clingy to Matt, and trying not let people down. Matt assists and reassures that she’s not letting people down and she’s doing great.
a/n: sorry if this is bad, but leave reqs in my inbox anytime, ily💕 also i know after party pt.4 has been put off awhile but i’m making time to fix it😭🤞
wc: 1k
not proofread (a bitch dont got no time for that shit)
based off of this song ↓
“when no one’s around me, you lost and found me, i was surrounded, with open, open, open, Open Arms”
y/n’s pov
fucking stupid idiot. you should have done it but look where you are now. from before i had 2 things on my to-do list
・Flashback・
“well, i’ll do it later.”
i wrote it down on my to-do list. i pet my dogーkelani and hug her,
“it’s okay i will get to it.”
i wrote down “get this week’s groceries and kelani’s dog food”
just make sure to get to it y/n.
・Now・
i had well over 7 things on my to-do list. i should’ve just done it while I could. so fucking dumb y/n. why do you let this happen? first it was my college classes, food for my dorm, the triplet’s birthday, my car repairs, my sister’s wedding back in london , my mom wants me to visit her in new york, and I have to study for my literature exam. if I don’t get anything for the triplet’s birthday they’ll definitely be disappointed, if i don’t visit my momーshe’ll definitely be upset; and if I don’t go to my sister’s wedding in london, i’m going to be seen as disrespectful to my elders.
i felt something bad was gonna happen but i wasn’t sure.
I was leaning on my bed, going through the list over and overーscolding myself each time. a sharp pain drilled through my chestーa new type of painーsomething i’d never felt before. but this? this hurt like hell. and all at the same time my vision got blurred and breathing became impossible. i’d decided that i had to call matt. he’d surely know how to deal with this, right? as i continued sobbing repeatedly, with breathing impeccably difficult, and my vision completely shattered. my phone rung a couple times, then,
finally he answered.
“hey baby what’s up?”
“matt i- n-need help”
my voice was in a mid-whisper but he still heard it.
“please help m-“
my voice was cut by me dropping my phone.
all of a sudden, my palms sweat and feel prickly and my clothes are overly tight. i hug myself and get into a fetal position, feeling like everything is wrong and i’m going to let everyone down and be one big disappointment.
matt’s pov
we were filming friday’s car video when i got that call from y/n. her voice sounded like she was crying, but she said help me. what the fuck happened?
“hey guys something is wrong with y/n”
“what happened?” chris questioned.
“her voice was all shaky and it sounded like she was crying or shit”
no questions were asked. nick didn’t yell or go on a rant about leaving. just driving.
ೃ༄
 
when i got to her room she was laying on the floor in fetal position, weeping, sobbing. god i hate to see her like this. curls laid out around her shoulder and her beautiful face covered in tears.
"matty?"
"yes baby its me"
"i don't know what to do matt," y/n said in between sobs whilst grabbing her chest trying to breathe.
i held y/n against me and tell me what's wrong.
"what's wrong y/n?"
"m-my vision went blurry and breathing became impossible and my palms felt like they were being poked by a million needles, my clothes got too tight and and-"
"you're having a panic attack y/n"
she didn't hear me so she went on about what happened.
"im going to let everyone down mattーthey're never gonna forgive me,"
"i have too much on my to-do list and if i dont do it i'm letting everyone down"
"look baby we're gonna take it one step at a time, one thing at a time."
"o-okay"
"let's breathe in on 3, okay?"
"okay"
y/n’s pov
i took a nice breath in then repeated the same motion, breathing out. my vision got better, my clothes stopped feeling too tight, palms stopped being pricked.
"thank you matt"
"of course y/n"
ೃ༄
we crossed off things of my to-do list, one by one, and before i realized i only had 2 things left on to-do list; like before.
i've never had a panic attack before and that attack could have been worse. but before i could spiral and get lost inside the darkness, i found my light.
matt was my light.
he was there for me, and always there with Open Arms
ೃ༄
extra: first of all, im so so so so so sorry for starving you all to fucking death; this fic took me forever😭😭
but tysm for reading !!
xoxo, riri <3
taglist: 🏷 @lovingmattysposts @elliesturniolo1 @elliewrites1 @sturnsbitch @lovingmattysposts @luvmxtt @novasturniolo03 @tyjna6 @sturnlova @sturniolo-lover1317 @patscorner
(comment here be on the taglist !!)
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