#but im the bad guy im the lazy emotional youngest sibling whos life was sooooooo perfect cus mom n dad treated me different
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Vent
Tw: sewerslide and SH
#....i really miss being 4yrs without a care in the world and my family loved each other so purely#fuck its not fair that she does this to me#im shaking over how upset this is making me#i cant always be the one at fault thats IMPOSSIBLE and not fair#she sees it as im lazy n dont like being told to do stuff#i see it as she literally picks on me everytime her health anxiety gets to her or her fiance......i watch it happen like fuckin clockworm#but im the bad guy im the lazy emotional youngest sibling whos life was sooooooo perfect cus mom n dad treated me different#I WAS HIGHLY AUTISTIC#im sorry that you wanna feel special so you gotta pretend my life was just so great cus i got extra attention#I NEEDED EXTRA ATTENTION#Dad did his best to make us all feel equal and you know thst#i du no im jjst fucking done with the littlw comments#i read over my dads shoulder so i already knew but my sister brought up what he said to her before sending me here since the waters broke#he said “please dont say anything to her she has enough on her plate”#and she just got all snippy with me about it#....i literally came to your house with 3 big slashes on my arm when do i get a fucking break from the picking????#next time ill do both my arms maybe then shell have nice emptions for me#im literally frozen in my seat sweating cus of how upset im trying not to bw#its very rare she has a soft moment with me and she completely ignores my scars or my mental health#shes now crying in the other room......#like....i dont even know what to do abymore its not fair im always the bad guy#i shouldnt have to deal with a shitty attitude ontop of the other stuff i got going on#its like shes allowed to stab me but i even react to the pain suddenly im a horrible person#its times like these i just wanna end myself cus im tired of trying so hard and having no one to unmask with#im constantly performing for other people only to not get the same energy back im SO tired#update: i escaped#i love my sister but when shes struggling she acts bitchy towards me and thats not fair#literally did the oppisite of what my dad asked her lmao#i bet she stopped crying and is now finding any lil mistake to bitch about#now im blasting sad music into my ears in hopes of not spiraling
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