#im so so so so so thrilled this is the first time ive done something like this i have so many ideas its gonna be so fun!!!!!

[slayingqueenchal]

noble house of bullshit | draco malfoy x f!reader

Summary: draco and reader broke up because of stupid reasons, but they'll have to marry and this is about resolving your relationship

Warnings : angst, fluff, happy ending, fights, curse words, pet names like 'love and doll', you are Theodore nott twin sister, old wip

'My dearest daughter, y/n

We remember that you've mentioned about the malfoy boy several times, draco malfoy. And it seems like you two are perfect.

From what your brother have said to us a few weeks ago, we found out that you had an eye on malfoy, and malfoy might be interested in you too.

We thought it'll be great, so, we arranged some stuff with lucius and narcissa malfoy, and, they've got letters from draco, some is about you.

And we arranged some stuff, and thought it'll be best if you two will marry after finishing Hogwarts. We thought that, we'd wait until you actually had some one that you were interested in to, then arrange somethings.

We know this isn't the most thrilling choice, or maybe it is, we just want the best for our Pureblood family. We didn't know when to tell you, but Draco knew about this a week ago, and we thought he'd tell you but he didn't, so we told you our self.

Well, we'll be ending this letter here, but, have a great day, y/n, we miss you

-your father and mother, dorian and cornelia'

You dropped the letter. Marriage? After finishing Hogwarts? Were you gonna go crazy like bellatrix did?

Sure, if they told you that a week ago you'd be happy. The only person who knew you had a messy breakup with draco was theo, and blaise.

Theo have never shaded someone this much before. And, to see him having fun after breaking your heart was painful for you.

You climbed up to your bed, thinking about the good times you had with draco since the start of Hogwarts. The 'oh this is just a small crush' turned into 'oh, I fell for him'. Even with the quite questionable things draco has done, he was a sweetheart. You remembered everything vividly.

"Love? You okay? " Draco said. You weren't okay. "Draco, ginny is gone" You cried. Remembering the first year girl that you grew quite close too. "Ginny? Weasley? " Draco said, he sounded like he wad annoying. "As much as you hate her family, you'd feel sad if someone is gone, right? Wouldn't you be sad if i was gone? " You wiped your tears.

"Oh doll,'sorry that Ive said that, and, of course I'd be said if you were gone, I'd be a mess" Draco said.

You wished you hated Ginny, and for good reasons. If that hadn't happen you wouldn't grow feelings. If only you two stayed friends you'd be fine.

"What the fuck Draco! " You screamed. "What? Is it my fault that you probably just 'love me' because I'm a Pureblood? Oh please" Draco mocked. The tears came out of your eyes so easily. "I love you, draco, why'd you say that?" You looked down.

"Cause.. You know what never mind that, just, it's over alright, we're over. Go" Draco took your hands, but you threw it away. "You think I'd marry someone just because of their blood status. But no, I'd never do that" You walked out of his room.

"I'd never do that, he says" You scoff on your bed, sobbing. "I hate you" You curled up, hugging your pillow.

Someone opened the door and gasped. "Y/n are you okay? " Daphne said. "I'm not well, not really" You said. "Oh gosh, should I get Draco? " She said. Which, hit the spot. "Is Theo there? " You asked. "There? Where? ", " Common room"."yes, he is in the common room " Daphne gave a weak smile. "Thanks, Daphne, uhm, Im going to talk to him" You gave a smile.

"Theo" You walked down the stairs. To see the Slytherin boys circle. And that sadly includes both Draco, and Theo.

"Lo- y/n, you alright? " Draco said. But you didn't answer. "Can I talk to you for a second, Theo? " You gave a weak smile to the rest of the boys, but not even looking at Draco. "Sure" Theo walked away, well still in the common room, no one was really there, just some first year.

You immediately cried again. "Y/n". "Did you know? " You said. "What? " Theodore said. "Father and mother made me marry him! Some arrangement shit! " You cried, hugging him. "Him? Draco? " Theo guessed, and you nodded.

"I need to be tough, but I can't." You cried. "You don't need to be tough, y/n, you just need to be here, alright? We're gonna solve everything, alright, I'll tell mom something but, go to sleep, okay, I promise you'll feel better.

"Don't tell mother, or father" You said, receiving a sigh and a small nod. While that night was a rollercoaster and felt like a few seconds, it felt like hours for Draco.

Theo walked to draco, well the others sorta knee by then about what happened, so they walked away and sat on another spot.

"Draco. How dare you" Theo said. "How dare I? She was the one who 'loved' me just because I'm a Pureblood" Draco scoffed.

"Listen, you don't get to just have fun after breaking my sisters heart. She's a mess, and after a day you acted like nothing happened, like you and her never exists and it broke her, you broke her and now your parents and mine are arranging marriage between the two of you, so you better fix things, or I'll fix them my self" Theo threatened.

"She doesn't even want to talk to me! " Draco said. "And was I the guy who broke her heart? You are, and, Id you don't fix things to atleast platonic level you two will spend the rest of your live in misery, maybe just her cause you don't even care do you? " Theo scoffed.

"I care for her, I love her! Until mom told me that we were getting married. I don't want to get married so young and I don't want to be with her, not because I believe that she only loves me because of my blood status, but because I need her to be happy, I don't want her marrying someone like me, I might love and care about her now but who knows what monster I might become later, I don't want to hurt her more" Draco mumbled.

"Well you fucked up already, Draco, just, do something and be lovely for her alright, Daphne told me she, she's not really at her best state so just don't force her into anything" Theo said, patting dracos shoulders before leaving, deciding it was enough rambling.

Well, that night not only Draco stayed up late, but the whole dorm. Everyone heard draco sniffing and mumbling, and being scrunched up on his bed.

And little did he know, you were doing the same thing too.

The next morning was tough. The trip to the great Hall was tough. Draco was so close yet so far. His eyes looked puffy 'he probably stayed up late talking shit or something ' you thought.

You barely ate your food, just watching Draco from afar, watching the person you couldve been happy with. The person you could've married happily. But now it's grim.

The library was silent, reading dorian gray was fun, especially when your fathers name is dorian. The book you used to read with draco was Lord of the rings. You wanted to continue but, it was too much. 'What happened to frodo, what happened to the shire' is what you would've asked if you were fine, but right now you were asking yourself if you were alright. The sun goes down, and the moon comes up.

"Y/n? " You recognised the voice. "Go away, like you told me to go away" You huffed. "Y/n, just wait" He said.

You turned and look at the blonde. Showing your bloodshot eyes, but shockingly, he had bloodshot eyes too. "What do you want draco? Make me feel bad again? " You said.

"No, never again y/n, it was a mistake! I knew we were going to get married before you did. I didn't want you to marry someone like me" Draco said, sitting on the chairs next to you.

"Well, haha, it happens that I want someone like you, you Draco, is it so hard to accept that I fell for you? " You said, standing up and putting the book where it was.

"It's not, y/n I know you love me and you know I love you! " He says. You ignored him.

"I just don't, you, you broke my heart Draco and you were out there having fun with your friends. Even they have some bit of common sense to care for me! Even in a brotherly-platonic way! But oh, you were having the best time of your life. The boys were worried, even crabbe too, but you didn't care did you? That you just full on broke my heart? We couldve sorted this out. And if you didn't want to spend you years with me we couldve solved this in a better way than breaking me into a million pieces! It's just not fair! "You cried out.

"Y/n, y/n, calm down, will you, love? ", Draco slowly got closer to you. Draco looks at your eyes. " I'm sorry, y/n, I really am sorry. I love you and, to know that I broke your heart messed me up and made me a bit of an asshole, but, I swear I'll be the best husband ever, y/n, I love you"

"I'm sorry too, Draco, I was a bit hars-", " You didn't do anything wrong " Draco cut off. "Well in that case, I love you" You smiled, the first genuine smile.

"We'll grow a family free from blood purity and all of that noble house of bullshit, we'll be a loving family, alright, doll? " Draco said, receiving a smile and a nod.

[celestie0]

this is probably overbearing or too much, but it’s genuine i swear. have u ever actually gave head to a man? i’ve never done that but i’m lowkey kinda scared to if i’m ever put in the position to, like fr, how does one do that? how do you even give “good head”? AND HOW DO YOU NOW THROW UP ON IT 😭😭😭

i’m sorry

hi my dear LOLLL you’re so valid for this dw

hmm i think firstly a guy shouldnt ever put you in that sort of position if you don’t want to or you don’t feel ready obviously. don’t let any guy make you feel pressured to if you don’t want to

but yea lol w that being said im no oral sex goddess lmfaoo but there are basics to giving head like no teeth, making sure his dick stays wet so theres no uncomfy friction, eye contact, generally the more fucked out you look the hotter he’ll find it (this used to be a big insecurity of mine is that there’s no way i look “pretty” or “cute” while sucking dick cuz of the angle n action etc but tbh i’ve been told that it’s hot to them either way lol)

also yea if u have a massive gag reflex dont bother to deep throat HAHA i have one too, i can kinda handle if im slow enough, but you really dont need to take it all the way just to impress. imo deepthroating is just porn stuff (or maybe thats what i tell myself to feel better lol)

also ive never given head unless i wanted to, even when i was in a relationship. i’ve never given it as a “favor”, its something i’d only do if it genuinely turns me on too. i think it’ll be easier to do if you just genuinely wanna suck his dick lol

idk if this helps at all but your fears are so valid, first few times might feel really awkward bc it can feel like there’s a lot of things to keep track of, but (1) w practice you’ll be fine (2) you can always just ask him what he does or doesn’t like (3) the right guy will just be thrilled you’re willing to do it in the first place

HAHAH ok mediocre sex ed over

[suugrbunz]

ahhhhhh I need a mota ship please 🥹

i’m a total introverted, shy girl type when i meet someone and it’s so annoying bc once i’m out of my shell im like a total different person but it usually takes a persistent type of person to get me there. i love to read and study english lit, writing and poetry are just my favorite things ever. romance is just 😍🥰❤️ i love it. i could talk for hours about my favorite books or even movie adaptations especially if ive had a few drinks. im very girly and love having my nails/hair/make up done but in more of a muted neutral kind of way. i do feel like i have a secret adventurous side though, it just takes some time and comfort for her to show up. i used to date a guy with a motorcycle and going for rides made me realize maybe i have a secret adrenaline seeking side? ive realized there’s still a lot of me i have to learn lol. sometimes i think im boring or a bit of a priss but if im comfortable enough i feel like a normal person in their early 20s every once in a while 🥲

no you can't have a ship bugger off. joking. of course you can!! yk what all these mota ships have in common? ... Including me as the writer. We are all suckers for writing and romance.

︵‿୨Curtis Biddick୧‿︵

Ima be real any man in the army air force definitely was naturally persistent and stubborn (and possibly arrogant)

I feel like you two would look so pretty together

like youre such a cute couple 𖹭

but because you have a shell people need to break through

...that means a friend introduced you two, that's the only logical way of this relationship coming about

he'll pay for your nails to be done

and if you paint them? he'll help you pay for nail polish because good quality nail polish isn't that cheap anymore

perhaps, you two first meet and he's just intrigued by you.

so he HAS to know more

absolutely has to.

so he'll be a quiet presence around you, making some small talk

because small talk can grow !!

it can become useful !!

the way he gets you to talk? books and their adaptations

he had to ask a friend of yours about what you love so he could get you to talk but

he did it

first date? a bookstore

he picks out a book for you

you pick out a book for him

praying that you get a good book

as for the adrenaline side?

definitely can handle that

you two can definitely do random things for the thrill of it together just because it'll help you wriggle out of the shell for a moment

I think that's the best part of the human experience doing something that makes you uncontrollably smile as pure joy fills your body

and that smile that you'll wear in that most is like the smile a kid wears when theyre in a candy shop.

so when he's able to get you to smile like that, he's so smitten

Which is how the first kiss occurs

it just sort of happens when you're in the midst of smiling

He presses this sweet kiss to your cheek and pulls you into a tender hug

he can't help it

when you're in love, things like that just sort of happen

He'll be there for you no matter the era of your life, he loves watching you discover yourself.

mwah love this dynamic

song ooo song ok

I think it'll be something light hearted but sentimental?

what about

with or without you by U2

That's a lovely song, I think?

[chenfordsbby]

"The Ride Along"

Season 1 Episode 7: “The Ride Along”

“Sergeant Grey informs Nolan and officer Bishop that they are going to have a movie director as a ride-along.  Bradford learns that his wife has been arrested for drug possession”

Original Air Date: December 4th, 2018

Written By: Robert Bella

Directed By: Cherie Nowlan

Before we start another episode, I just want to express all of the continued love and support and likes and re-blogs and thought and opinions on everything that I have shared so far!  I know there has been a multitude of re-watch blogs this hiatus so for everyone who has stuck with me and will continue to stick with me, the appreciation is endless so thank you!!  With that being said, shall we begin!

This is the best cold open we have seen so far, with the cutest premise of why it was done, “Make-a- Cop Wish Foundation”! One of the many reasons why this show is flat out amazing.

Ben is back, and putting Nolan in his place, get out there and stop being a sad little puppy.  I mean, Nolan is acting like a whiny child.  If this is how he is acting after the breakup with Lucy, who he was only dating for a few months, I can only imagine how he acted after his divorce from his wife of 20 years. 

Im glad there is another episode with Lucys hair still in her braid buns, I wish they lasted longer.

Grey asks what one of the worst days on the job can be with the vets giving all different answers, but according to Grey, it is The VIP Ride Along.  The officers have to limit the calls they take as to not put the VIP in any danger, have to make sure the VIP is getting treated as such, but also while still doing there job as well. “He doesn’t get anywhere near danger” Sounds like its going to be a slow day for Bishop and Nolan.  Every call that comes in over the radio gets bypassed by Nolan and Bishop until they get a less than thrilling one, no action to put the VIP in danger.   They respond to the call which seems to be innocent, but Bishop and Nolan enter a house unsecured which reveals a dead body.  VIP continues to want to toss money around to make this house call pass by, which shows his arrogance, this is something exciting for him, but for John and Talia, this is the proper protocol for what they have to do when put in this situation, this is still their job, and they need to do it the right way, no matter if VIP is there or not. 

Bishop and Nolan respond to another call, a family disturbance.  Nolan and Bishop both see that the distressed man has mental issues and they quickly de-escalate the situation without any force.  They inform the family that he will be placed in a 24 hour mental facility hold which is better suited for their brother than putting him in a jail holding cell.

Taking Ben’s advice, John accepts the invitation to go to VIP’s house party that night and maybe it was a good thing he was there too- he saved a girl from being roofied!  I still appreciate that Nolan is still the comedic factor of every episode in some way. The next day, while out on patrol John and Talia answer a personal call on Johns phone and it is VIP under attack from the family of the disturbance call from the previous day. Turns out maybe VIP isn’t such a bad guy after all- he called up the family from the previous days arrest and offered to pay for a spot in a mental facility and they took it completely the wrong way and attacked him.  Ive said it before and I’ll say it again, as much as Nolan is the comedy relief, he also has a way with his words and he knows how to use them well- he could talk himself and others out of any situation.  At the end of the episode, John video calls his son, and it’s the first time we see him being a dad!  Obviously we are going to see him again soon as John mentions he will buy tickets to fly his son out to LA!  This show continues to have a good balance between the professional and personal aspects of all of their characters!

This is the first we hear of Angela being interested in the open detective position.    Angela wants to move up, and thanks to Jackson, she has some inside intel.  When Angela and Jackson respond to the 9-1-1 call, they see a kid electrocuting himself, solely to get an adrenaline rush.  Jackson is quick to make an arrest, but Angela stops him after doing a quick canvas of the scene.  She spots all stolen hospital property,  and is already thinking 5 steps ahead: you have to go through all of the minnows to get to the big shark. 

Angela’s detectives skills are very visible and apparent this episode, she knows how good she can be as a detective and she wants to make it known.  Not only is she putting her potential detective skills in use, but she is also teaching Jackson how to long for a bigger picture in making certain arrests happen, also like thinking of a food chain, how to use the bottom feeders to get to the top.  At the end of the episode though, it turns out that Angela got way ahead of herself and the big guy on top turns out to be a dead end as Captain Anderson informs them.  The prospect of Angela potentially getting the tap and becoming detective got the best of her that day and she got a little over her head?  It’s upsetting for Angela, but Jackson is there for her every step of the way and continues to support her.  It is nice to see Angela and Jacksons budding friendship in this episode, it seems to be evolving into a really special bond. 

Now onto the #Chenford of it all (our favorite part of every episode)!

Tim and Lucy are still at the station, with Tim un-patiently waiting for Lucy to grab their shops gear when Grey summons Tim into his office.  Once in the office, Grey informs Tim of a recent drug bust, and the arrested suspect is Isabel.  You can see Tim’s heart drop into his stomach at that news.  I wish we could be inside Tim’s head here, because he is clearly reeling from this information.  Tim hasn’t seen or heard from Isabel in a year, and then after one random day while on the job, she’s back in his life and not the way that Tim was hoping for.  Every time he’s seen her since, its been at the police station, and it is evident she is till on drugs, which continues to cause major stress on their already strained marriage.  How much more can it take?  How much more can Tim take?

It’s like Tim is in the twilight zone for a bit this episode.  He doesn’t know what to think, act or feel, and is kind of just there.  For a man who claims to never show no emotion, you can see every one written across his face and in his eyes when he watches from afar, the detectives bring Isabel into the station.  I wish I could jump though my screen and give Tim a hug.  I feel like that’s what he needs right now, a hug from someone who will never let him go. (Ahem Lucy!!!)

The detectives let Grey and Tim in on what is going on with Isabel and what will happen with her now that she was arrested.  Isabel is deep with heroin, and with other heroin dealers. The detectives do make a good point, “Is he a cop or the suspects husband”; Tim is really caught between a rock and a hard place in this episode.  Does he put his feelings aside and practice what he preaches to Lucy and be the cop, or does he put his professionalism on the back burner and be Isabels husband in her time of need and help her out, even though she probably doesn’t deserve it.  What is Tim to do, or feel? 

Tim and Lucy bring in a suspect for public urination, but I think it is a ruse for Tim to get himself bak to the station to see Isabel, I mean, even Lucy knows this arrest is nonsense but she has Tim’s back, so she just does as he says.  Lucy spots Tim looking at Isabel and lets him know that shell keep an eye out for the detectives so he can have a conversation with Isabel.

We know what Tim and Isabels relationship is like now, but it makes me wonder what their relationship was like for the past 10 years.  How long was it good until it got bad?  How were they at work together? How were they like at home?  This episode makes me want to know so much more about Tim.  Isabel knows she’s in big trouble for heroin possession, which is why she asks Tim to do the unthinkable and get rid of the stashed heroin at her ‘sometimes boyfriends’ house so the cops don’t find it when they raid the apartment. I can only imagine how that made Tim feel- having your current wife talk about her boyfriend, like a knife to an already bleeding wound.  In my opinion, I think Isabel begging Tim to help her is out of pure selfishness.  She knows what will happen to her if she goes to prison, and she will do any means necessary to stay out of it, and that includes begging Tim to help her with this. In no way does she ever think about what she’s asking Tim to do will affect him, but why would she though.  It’s an interesting choice when the camera pans to Lucy right after Isabel asks him to hide her stash, I wonder why?

Later that night, a stealthy looking Tim breaks himself into Isabels apartment, he opens the heating unit and finds the heroin exactly where Isabel said it would be, and in that moment we don’t see what his decision is as he’s back on the streets.  Is this rock bottom for Tim and Isabel’s relationship?  When they exchanged vows 10 years ago, I don’t think Isabel asking Tim to confiscate kilos of heroin from her sometimes boyfriends apartment was a thought.  How does not only a strained relationship, but also strained marriage recover from a situation like this?  I mean, can it ever recover and go back to what it used to be?

Tim almost gets in his car until Lucy steps out of hers.  My first though when Lucy gets out of her car is how did she know that Tim was going to be there, but it brings us back to when Lucy was listening into the conversation between Tim and Isabel in the holding cell, Lucy has always been listening, this entire time. 

Lucy is there for Tim.  Just like we don’t know what Tim decided to do, neither does Lucy, but that doesn’t matter.  Tim and Lucy have only known each other for 2 months, but in those 2 months, Lucy has learned who Tim is.  I mean he doesn’t make it easy for her to forget.  Lucy knows that if he does help her, it will completely change him as not only a cop, but a person and maybe even as a husband.  That is why Lucy is there, to remind Tim of that, and after she does, is silence is loud. There is no response from him, he just walks away and I really do believe it’s because he knows that she’s right.  Lucy knows that if Tim did this for Isabel, it would just put her back on the streets, and right back into a cycle, learning nothing from it.  Lucy just knows. There was no reason why Lucy needed to show up that night to talk to Tim, she just knew that she had to, no matter how much shit she would get for it from him the next day. This was one of those moments that furthered their friendship, even though neither of them realized it at the time.  

The next morning, Tim pretends as if nothing happened from the previous night. His  decision is revealed that he actually didn’t help Isabel and he left the heroin in the apartment as told to us by Grey.  Lucy tells Tim that he did the right thing, so why does Tim look like he didn’t.  Not that Isabel deserves anything from Tim, but he apologies to her that he didn’t or couldn’t help her and she is quick to dismiss it; which just shows how much she isn’t willing to change.  At no point in this entire episode was Isabel thinking of anybody but herself whereas Tim was thinking of everybody but himself.  And by everybody, I mean Isabel.  She claims that because of what Tim didn’t do, that they will never know if she could’ve actually changed and gotten her life together, but I think that deep down, Tim knows that she would’ve just ended right back in the streets, repeating the same cycle.  And that’s why he made the choices that he made.  Isabel’s lashing out at Tim is misplaced and uncalled for and Tim just takes it, what else can he do, he just signed over a prison sentence to his wife. 

At the end of this episode, Tim is sitting in silence in his car when Angela and Talia show up and enter his space.  They already know what Tim is going to say, but that doesn’t mater for them, whether he likes it or not, the girls are there for him, jus like they have been and always will be.  That is what friends do.  Angela and Talia were friends with not only Tim, but Isabel as well, and watched the marriage start to fall apart and they are going to be there to pick up all of Tim’s broken pieces and help put them back together again; well mainly Angela, and a lot of Lucy, because Lucy is and will always be exactly who Tim needs, he just doesn’t know it yet!

______________________________________________________________

Honorable Mention: Lucy’s baby, her car!

Episode Peak: Jackson & Angela

Episode Pit: Distraught Tim

Quote of the Episode: “No, I came here to remind you that you’ll regret helping her.  Because it’s not gonna change her, but it’ll sure as hell change you” ~ Lucy Chen

Episode Rating: 8/10.  I enjoyed this episode.  Not only did it give us one of the best Season1 Chenford scenes, but it also shows the blooming friendship between Jackson and Angela! 

__________________________________________________________

Another episode down! Thank you, thank you, thank you again for reading and chiming in! I truly appreciate it! 7 episode down, only 91 more to go!!!!

Until next time on, "Get in the Shop"...

[wh1zz3rbr0wn]

me ranting on the marvin triolgy i unironically love the marvin trilogy so much?? in trousers makes no sense. esp the end song/ begginning depends on what like version ur listening too. i heard this theory that in trousers is actually marvin being hypnotised by mendle in therapy and it would make sense!! like it'd explain the inaccuracies between it and falsettos. Like Trina having two kids, as mentioned in your lips and me, 'the oldest drink wine the baby's wailing', while in falsettos Jason is the only child known. And in you gotta die sometime when whizzer says i dont smoke but in whizzer going down marvin says 'he takes me in his arms and he lights *another* cigarette.' Then i love how they re used im breaking down from in trousers and using it in the 2016 revival of it. imo it fits better in falsettos because you go more in depth about both trina and whizzer charaters. In trousers musicals actually is so bloody good??? like every song is great, my favourite song is marvin's giddy seizures. It highlights marvin's suicidal attempts and how it doesn't get noticed unless he acts out., then the whole thing just sounds so good. i wish the lesbians got more screen time though because theyre so radicial. every scene they're in they just light the stage up. I love how all the charaters are wrote. I would like to know if in high school ladies at 5 o'clock/ the r--e of mrs goldurg. are we meant to take that literally? im assuming we are because marvin says something along the lines of for my 14th birthday i was hoping you could show me the wonders of the bed. i think we would be, and if we are what the fuck? like i know marvin is an incredibly abusive person before about time but jesus christ. i didnt expect that. now i do adore that marvin's abusive behaviours are acknowledged and reprimanded unlike another musical that attempts to do something alike to falsettos, rent, where all characters have abusive behaviours. i wont dwell on the failures of rent too much because this isn't about rent. I have saw that 2004 college production amd i find it hilarious that in the thrill of first love that marvin drops whizzer, i hope that was scripted because that seems like such a Marvin behaviour. at the same time it would also be funny if it wasnt. either way i like it. anyway in marvin at the physiatrist, in the og off brodway cast, mendle says its queer mr marvin which is so funny to me. on the topic of the og off brodway cast, i find it fun how chip zien played both marvin and mendle in in trousers and march of the falsettos/falsettoland. marvin in in trousers and mendle in MotF/falsettoland respectably. I genuinely adore everything about falsettos. the openeing number is such a good opening song, i dont think ive heard a better one. Then my father's a homo always makes me laugh and i just love how jason doesn't hate his father for being gay, its how his homosexuality tore the family apart. Then this had better come to a stop is such agood number. i love how in the og of brodway run of it the late again sounds like yapping. then the way that trina and whizzer sort of bond over marvin's abusive tendencies is heartbreaking. A tight knit family reprise is a great song again. then the chess game, marvin my guy you know you agreed to let whizzer win cmon now. i never wanted to love you is heartbreaking. and the games i play makes me violently sob. march of the falsettos made no sense to me until i realised that it was a song to remind you that acts of affection are NOT masculine at all. i honestly dont get why act one didnt end with i never wanted to love you, but father to son is heartwarming compared to the previous songs. i love the second act so much. marvin has done everything to change himself yet the love of his life is stripped away from him. it is like a reminder that due to his past actions he can never like fully be a good person. he changed. he did im not putting that down, but his actions can always haunt him.

[turkeyjournal]

Book review: Killers of a certain age by Deanna Raybourn

Just want to preface there WILL be spoilers so, dont read if you dont want spoilers.

OVERALL RATING: 7.8/10

Brief Descripition: 4 old ladies: Billie, Mary Alice, Helen and Natalie have worked for a secret assasination organzation called 'The museum' and forty years have been assasians. When they each are at the time of their life where they are retiring and decide to go on a cruise ship when all of a sudden the get attacked by The museum...

My Personal Thoughts: To be completly honest, i really enjoyed this book. I had alot of fun reading it and it was super fun. I wondered how they could write an action kind of novel in a book. Like how do you even write action scenes but Raybourn proved me wrong. This book is more a thriller/mystery/action type o book and i seriously suggest people read it. I was gonna give it a 8 but everytime they would mention art and descriptions of the art in the book, especially when at the end when they killed the baroness and at the end when they were trying to kill Vance i just got so bored and confused so it kind of ruined the vibe.

I actually thought i found a spelling error but then i found out that the word 'diffident' is a real word. I thought she was saying different but nevermind she wasnt. So there was no spelling errors which is great. I hate when a book has spelling errors it just looks dumb.

The start of the book, so like the first 50 pages were so bored. I think it had a good plot but i was reading it and just felt bored. But ater the first 50 pages, it was like i was stuck. The story was so intresting and thrilling, i loved how the book described every move. Sometimes the fight scenes in this made no sense, like at the end or example. When Billie was fighting Vance, half way i thought "what the hell is going on" and like "how is that move even humanely possible."

Billie was my favorite charcter. She had this kind of cool macho Sylvester Stallone in tusla king feel. It was cool to see a badass and older women who isnt some weird quiet "ive seen so many things and im so dainty and delicate and misunderstood" type of main charcter. Even her realtionship with Tarverner wasnt all angry and stupid, it was really mature and lovely.

During the time when they had killed Sweeney and Helen paused when shooting i thought that maybe Helen had something she was hiding and couldve done some whole betrayel act and played more into that because alot of back stabbing was happening throughout the story, but thats just my opinons honestly.

Overall, would i read it again? Maybe i could. When i rate things 7-8 usually means i really liked the book but it couldve been better and i MIGHT re read it but not 100% likely to. I think the size of the story was really good and i enjoyed it alot and it wasnt a hard read. It did however take me 2 weeks to actually start reading the book but that was only because i had alot to do with school and midterms. But now that i finally got to read it i thourghouly enjoyed it and i will be suggesting people to read this book aswell. I added an actualy picture of the book because last review looked a little dull so i put thisi to make it look prettier.

[firelord-frowny]

dumb

i finallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy went to the national aquarium yesterday omg and had a grand old tiiiiiime and took a ton of pics and videos and i thoroughly enjoyed myself and will elaborate on the enjoyment in the near future!

but first i need to whine about an annoyingly unhappy thing that was hanging in the back of my mind for a lot of the time.

i went with both of my parents, which was fine, bc thats who i wanted to go with.

but i really would have fucking preferred to do it sometime around the FIRST time i asked to go, which was when I was ohhhh, i dunno, A CHILD??? When I was 10, 11, 12, and still aspiring to have a career in zoology. And there was never ever ever a reason why we couldn't go, other than that my parents ~didn't feel like finding parking.~ i can't even tell you all the shit my family has never done together SOLELY because ~it's hard to find parking.~ everyfuckingbody else on earth can find parking! everyfuckingbody else on earth can deal with a lil inconvenience if it means getting to do something fun/memorable or giving someone they love something special. but not my lame ass family!

so, here i am now, a whole 29 years old, FINALLY having a nice day at the damn aquarium with my parents.

and i'm looking around at all these tiny children having the time of their lives with their parents and i couldn't help but feel jealous. :/ I wanted to be a 10 year old running around and demanding that my parents pick me up so I can get a better view of what's swimming near the top of a tall tank. I wanted to nyoom through the gift shop and try out all the different toys and flip through the children's books, blah blah.

anyway, we get to the part of the aquarium that has the touch pools where you get to just fuckin pet stingrays and shit! and i was so excited bc there are so many sea creatures ive always wanted to touch! i touched a horsehoe crab and a jellyfish! IVE ALWAYS WANTED TO PET A JELLYFISH!!! And I was thrilled about it!

but neither of my parents would pet anything!

which i mean, obviously that's their right, and they dont have to touch anything they dont wanna touch, but it just made me feel super isolated and outcast and reemphasized just how utterly alone i've always felt within my own family. literally NOBODY that im related to delights in any of the same things I delight in, and it fucking sucks.

which i mean, duh, that's what ~friendships~ and ~peer groups~ are for, but i feel like most people have at least a LITTLE BIT in common with their families. songs they can listen to together and equally enjoy. places they're equally excited to go to. activities everyone looks forward to with genuine eagerness.

i have none of that and i really really really wish that wasn't the case.

also? a lottttttt of the staff who stand by the exhibits and share ~fun facts~ about various animals/plants/etc were high school volunteers. that's so fucking neat!

and in the back of my mind i was so hyperaware that if i had known about such a volunteer opportunity when i was in high school, there is 0 chance that my parents would have been willing to drive me up to baltimore a few days a week. even if it meant having something fantastic to add to my college applications. even if it meant getting valuable exposure in a career field i was interested in at the time.

i mean, ok, baltimore is about 45-60 minutes from here, which IS a bit of a drive, i know.

but where the fuck else around here would there have been an opportunity to immerse myself in something that was so perfectly aligned with my deepest passions and desires? where, within a 10 or 15 minute drive of my home, would i have been able to stand next to a death adder's terrarium and tell guests all about their extremely potent neurotoxic venom or that even though they're morphologically very similar to vipers, they're actually elapids like cobras and mambas?

nowhere! nowhere!

maybe i could have volunteered down at the rinky dink lil nature center near my house and told 2 people per day that the snake in the tank that's clearly labeled as a corn snake in bigass letters is a corn snake.

just, my enrichment and my exposure to the thing i loved most in the world wouldn't have been worth a few hours of my parents time on weekends and that makes me really kinda fucking sad because now im an entire real life grown adult with 0 of the connections or confidence or skills that i'd need to start living a life that actually incorporates my favorite things on a regular and sustainable basis, and now it's MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY PROBLEM to try to fill in all the gaps that my parents were content to leave wide open just because they didnt fucking feel like nurturing the person i truly was.

honest to god, i cant look at a place like the national aquarium or the national zoo or any place like that, and feel like i deserve to even volunteer there. i dont feel like i deserve to even sweep the fucking floor. i'm watching the custodial staff mopping down the floor in the dolphin viewing area and all i can think about is how much i don't deserve to even do that. (which, obviously, isn't to say that being a custodian isn't an Important Job that requires its own skillset, but it's not a skillset that you need 4 years of overpriced education to excel at).

bc my dumb brain can't stop thinking: if my own damn parents didn't think i was important enough to expose me to things i was interested in even, WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY would literaally anybody else think i'm worthy of anything at all?? if i'm not important enough to be driven to an amazing volunteer opportunity as a kid, why would that same place think i'm important enough to let me volunteer there even if i did have a ride???? when there are soooooooooo many other kids who ARE important enough for their parents to go out of their way to help them reach their goals?

___________________

AND YOU KNOW WHAT????

my parents did spend significantly more money than most parents spend on their kids for my violin stuff. my violin is Pretty Dang Expensive. they paid out the ass for me to go to tanglewood one summer. they drove me once a week to my violin lessons, which took up a couple hours of their time. i'm appreciative.

but i'm ALSO keenly aware that i literally didn't ask for any of it.

the only thing i DID ask for was to just play the violin in general. but i specifically remember being an orchestra major in middle school and asking my parents if i could take private lessons outside of school, and they unceremoniously told me that no, you greedy little child, we're not paying for more private lessons when you're already in the free music program at school.

but the second i got into high school and my orchestra director told my parents to put me in private lessons, nevermind the fact that i already had free lessons with a very decent teacher at school, my parents signed me up on the spot.

when my violin teacher told my parents to send me to tanglewood, they did. when my violin teacher told my parents to buy me a new, professional quality violin, they did.

they did all of those things because someone who Wasn't Me said it was important.

shit, i remember being like 15 and wanting to get a lil part time job working at petsmart, and they told me i couldn't do it, because they didn't feel like dropping me off or picking me up from the petsmart 10 fucking minutes away from our house.

lmao can you imaginnnneeeee all the confidence and self-actualization i could have developed if even one single thing i asked to do was facilitated and nurtured by my parents?????

and now i have to struggle to learn this shit on my own because it's Not Their Problem if their adult child is struggling??

i hate me.

[grasslandgirl]

What’s your plan when you finish noble pining au? Is it going to be like a chapter a week situation? Are you even a no wips published person or is noble pining getting special treatment? Is it even going to be called noble pining or are you going to come up with a different title?👀

so genuinely anon, getting asks about noble pining makes my day SO bright it brings me joy unlike anything else <33 so thank you thank you thank you

What’s your plan when you finish noble pining au? Is it going to be like a chapter a week situation?

yes! currently the plan for when i finish writing noble pining is to try and post a chapter a week! which will take. a very long time lmao bc im currently at 18 chapters with at least a few more to go after the one im writing rn jskfbvkfb but yeah you'll definitely hear about it when i finish and start posting because the plan is to post a chap every week !!

Are you even a no wips published person or is noble pining getting special treatment?

i actually do try to finish wips before posting as a general rule- there are a couple exceptions ive posted as i've written, but more often than not when i post chaps on a wip before ive finished the whole thing i tend not to finish writing or posting it at all, which i don't love bc then i have unfinished wips hanging out on my ao3 </3 having the promise of getting to post my work and getting to share it and get feedback about it is a big motivator for me, so even when i know a wip is gonna be a multichap, i usually wait until the whole thing is done before posting

and especially with noble pining, because it's so long and involved, a large part of my process especially when i'm blocked is to go back and edit and read back through old chapters- updating and changing things that warrant it and getting inspo for later chapters, and i like having the freedom of being able to do that without having to worry about updating already posted chapters!

Is it even going to be called noble pining or are you going to come up with a different title?👀

the plan was always for "noble pining" to be a working title for the fic lmao, it was something i came up with ages ago when i was first talking about the idea with casey and got tired of typing out "the princess adaine guards fabian and gorgug fic" and came up with noble pining as a stopgap working title until i came up with something more formal lmao, and that's still the plan- i'm considering between a couple formal titles right now, but when i eventually do post it ill probably still call it noble pining as well as the actual title i decide on, because i recognize it'll probably be a little confusing to refer to it solely by another name when ive been blogging about it as noble pining for so long (honestly i never expected to get back so much interest and so many asks about noble pining! i always thought of it as my silly little niche passion project, and so to receive so much interest and excitement about it is truly so lovely and heartening to hear!)

anon again thank you so much for sending in this ask !!!!!!! it's so exciting and lovely and heartwarming to know that there is interest about noble pining out there from people other than y handful of friends i've bullied into letting me talk about it, and i'm thrilled to answer any asks or questions you guys have about it while i work on it !!!

[coming-of-age-witch]

yooooooooo

i studied today in the morning (sudden motivation ikyk)

the lack of emoji-use in my replies makes it look so thesis-ish but thats good for eye concentration (telling this to myself)

pata h, once i wrote 3 paged answer for a 3 marks literature question (the skill of stopping and ending articulately when required is lacked.) and got 0 because of is length, that was traumatic, that is traumatic (atleast i flaunted my then- recently gained- english skills)

oh i see how your ability to observe people made you go so deep through that guy, that even though he left you could see his potential, his ability to succeed, his lost glory ah, thats wonderfully tragic. broooo i'm bit crooked emotional too, like i just feel bad for anyone that goes through stuffs. and you know the most unfortunate thing is, is when you play news and like 9/10 of the topics are of things done to woman, like thats infuriarating and not just that sometimes just thinking of the pain the family members go through is just- scary.

that guy's incident was just a month ago?? so the wounds are afresh, i really hate when people say that those who take their life are cowards, like they aren't cowards, they battled all so much they could've battled all so more too, they didn't see the string of light or were unable to visualize the end of the tunnel from their depth of darkness (like its so subjective, how can people generalize it to cowardice)

i just hope he becomes a good memory of yours, the sooner it is, the less dreadful will be his passing away

****

I AM GONNA NOTE ALL THOSE TIPS YOU JUST DROPPED, LIKE

YOU ARE MY MENTOR

i mentione dthings that even i didnt bother to notice it, slayyyyy ALSO YOU'RE SO RIGHT sometimes you know it when you see something that the person itself hasn't noticed it, and if you tell that person, depending upon how close you are, there are 2 reactions, them feeling special and acknowledged or.....creeped out. in those complexified murder case dramas and books, one thing i've seen surely is how the criminal has a certain sense of oddity in them, it depends on the eyes that are looking for the criminal and how fast the eyes can latch onto the hints, because there are always hints, always, some so surfacial and some hidden in the bedrocks of the earth (ok i detracted so baaaaad) (ehehehe) (but you know i loooove psychological books) (i literally read them to give myself the thrill and see how different minds (of the detective and the criminal) work, llike its training myself in the basic ethics, although im not growing up to go anywhere in police, if i were to find myself in such a situation- ever-)SO YEAH AL THOSE READING BETWEEN THE LINES THAT OUVE MENTIONED ARE TOP NOTCH , i assume its a perfect part-time hobby isn't it

shhhhhoooould i speak more about the tall guy?? (im gonna start and i wont assure you where it ends) (BECAUSE HE APPEARED IN MY DREAMS.)

ok so you see ive had many crushes before . i have this verrryyyy verrrryyyyyyyyyyyyyy unsaid unspoken untold desire (peepeeepooopooo) to experience teenage love , like not those instagrammified once, i have the simplest desires- holding hands if ever possible and consented and if the other person is okay with it, and idk- honestly- talking ??? (i really dont know what to expect), but brooo ive seen a classmate of mine have a fairytale-ish trope with her crush, basically she liked him first, he dgaf, she made themoves, somehow it worked and they started dating, but it was non-existent , she told me he never replied to her texts, they barely talked, she used to give him cute notes, there were any replies to it, he didnt show any sort of response to her overjoyed giddy self. then. she felt her mom got to know about it (indian parent classic) and scared she was, she told him they can't continue. i think atp bro went through a mental metamorphosis because after this sudden request to break up, he changed, and like he's responsive, they talk alot during recess and afterschool, hold hands, she gives him notes and while he doesnt respond, its a well known fact that he has a keep for them (THE BEST PART IS THEY KEEP IT SO LOWKEY) (like, its just so normal, none of them are bloody possessives or cocky about it) (to me they seem like normal teens enjoying their peek teen love through a little rose tinted glass, while being aware that the glass is rose tinted)

IRDK WHY I TOLD YOU THIS STORY but like, i want something like this, they're so cute, and i wish them all good health. i want something like this, but like it never happens to me, i am not comparing myself but he didnt like her at first and slowly fell??? ajskdhsjks. i've had this one guy , who was my arch academic nemesis in middle school (in one year, he had higher grades than me, and i disliked him so much that i started like him, and NOW ALL OF MY FRIENDS AND EVEN RANDOM PEOPLE KNOW HOW BADLY I LIKE HIM) like i've liked him since 6th grade and now its 9th, that makes it 3 effing years. im tired of liking him, i could care less if he's in my class, but whenver i see him i get a sudden boom of joy and at the end of the day he's like my defaulted crush. but bro, i think ive made it so clear to him i like him (or i didnt idk but there were certainc ircumstances for sure) , this exam he got more marks than me ( :(sed ) . idk ive heard once he liked some girls, but for my own sanity and delusions <3 , never paid much heed to it. also it seems he's recently getting aware of all kinds of crush stuffs BUT THE TALL GUY, he knows it (all his bsfs are into it, well except him)

idk what to do with this crush on the tall guy, i dont want to tell my irl friends for some reason (they alr know how easily i fall for guys, idk why i'm not telling them, perhaps i do know, and perhaps its because i want them to think i no longer have any crush on anyone, for a timebeing that'll feel good) also like i have had 4 proper crushes (the 1st one is that middle school smart guy who i just told about, i interact with him almost daily because well altho he;s not in my section, he comes to my section early morning )

-CRINGE ALERT- -CRINGE ALERT-

, there was another one, this crush, this was the first time the idea of "dating" was put in my head (by a friend of mine) and DO YOU KNOW HOW GULLIBLE I AM??? like for a second i actually had a thought about having a boyfriend?? like i didnt' even like this guy ok (calling him riri from now). this same friend of mine (he's my bestfriend, lets call him sid) sat with riri and sits with riri, and just once i told him riri looks good, and in midst of their whatever convo sid told him that i said he looks good, and then urged him to date me, and during that particular time (this year, middle of may i think) i was crush-less (my crush on that middle school smart kid goes away from time to time, intervals you see) and he urged me to date too, and last year me and sid and riri were in the same sections, me and riri didnt interact much but he didnt seem bad to me. but like after all those urging, one day he said to one of my friends (jokingly or not) something, which was darn ass rudeeee and like i lost all of my wishes then and then (later there came many instance of riri being a jerk ass)

this riri one was so sudden it scared me. basically, i dont think my luck will work out right , because for a second i just felt that gleeful teeny cheeky giddy happiness you know?? it all went down tho. this tall guy is fun okay, ive made my share of observations on him and i'll keep observing him because as i said i dont intend to do anything, i dont want to face a stupid realization again (that i was just goofed up and that the idea is shitty)(like i am balancing my studies well and good, it isn't going terrible, can't i have a little bit of those stuffs?) we have a mutual friend , and one thing ik is that , that guy is good and FUNN and he'll prolly tell me wholesome things about tall guy (but they're almost like bestfriends so erm---) idk what i am expected or what i want even. i am just so confused. he's good in studies, so am i, he gives speeches, so do i, we spent a whole month prepping a project and had so much fun, idk idk idkkkkkkkkk , like its so good for now, idk want to do anything that turns the fun off, but i have the slightest of feeling that (can't put it into words, too cringe, help). those fun adventures of having a crush are creeping on me, pushing me to accept that i like him and like do think about him but ermmmmmm im hesistant, past experiences were just dull)

LOOK I TOLD YOU I WOULDN'T STOP IF I START SPEAKING, SOME DAYS IM JUST A TAD BIT EXTREMLY EMO ABOUT THE STUPIDEEEST STUFF LIKE IT WONT EVEN MATTER TMR WHEN I WOKE UP BUT FOR NOW ILL JUST THINK ABOUT IT , ALSO WHEN I WOKE UP FROM THE DREAM I HAD OF TALL GUY , MY FIRST THOUGHT WAS -IM GONNA TELL BROKOALA- (yes i'll call you brokoala, sounds a fine name to me) andddd look i said to you everything apart from that dream ehehehehehehe

i'll go take a break cause i really infodumped you with the MOST UNNCESSARY shittalks , i am so sorry i went about talking about myself , THIS HAPPENS WHEN SOMEONE SHOWS TAD BIT INTEREST IN TOPICS THAT IM USUALLY RELUCTANT TO SPEAK DIRECTLY ON LIKEEE help. i like having these goody giddy moments sometimes, and i just got hyped up todayyyyy

*****

back from the break like a boogeyman (idk what a boogeyman is) (idk what this means)

you know in that last paragraph where you talked about insecurities, i swear that part where you told about invisibilizing oneself I'LL GET IT NOTED DOWN ( i have a journal with advices i find from wise stranger-turned-friends and thats perfect for it) LIKE ITS SOMETHING I NEEDED TO HEAR, you put it into words so perfectly, i adore you, you're wise, pls share wisdom, ehehehehhe. they're telling you about laugh???? yoooo- laughter, in accordance to my belief, is the prettiest part of a person, so unique so individualistic and so unintended , like you kno you can guess when someones faking their laughter (which is sad because they're attempting to sound themshelves or like to appeal others- but i understand) , laughter adds onto character of a person, I LIKE YOUR PERSONALITY, that stance you took to keep your laugh unfiltered is so stronggg, i admire you for that okayy, like you handled all those comments and stood up for what was and will always be yours??? its brilliantttt. "as long as their annoyance doesnt make sense" like- real so real, some people be complaining for the sake of complaining, its not like your laughter is giving them brain tumor or stuffs. YOU KNOW IM GONNA RE-READ THAT LAST PARAGRAPH OF YOURS SO SO MANY TIMES, because????? every part of it, every effing part of it is so authentic and i just, i cant express how impactful that is. the fact that you told everything we do will effect people r,l & c. and its not selfishness to keep fixed like- that made me think okay, i love youuu

yk i go to school with my hair oiled a day a week or 2 days a week, i really dont care about how i look, but sometimes i do, and a girl last year kept asking why i put oil (like repeatedly, after telling hr so many times she'd keep asking), and while it didn't have an immediate effect on me, i got kinda tired and started getting those -look-wise- concern (now i dont take shit from someone who isnt even my friend but i swear i dislike her so much) since i'll be putting oil either way, might as well focus on making myself look good with it (i wear less oil nowadays tho- aftermath ig) THINKING OF THAT PARAGRAPH MADE ME THINK ABOUT THIS THING I JUST TOLD LIKE WOW, ONLY IF I KNEW IT EARLIER honestly its not late, i loved that adviceeee ahhhh

sidenote : i talked less about that friend of yours because like if you still feel gloomy about him, it'll go gloomier. and i see how you share an emotional depth with him, he's no longer there, so there's no receiver on the other end. this is like a scene when the caller dials up a deadtone. this shattering incident of that guy just enhanced your skill of feeling deeply, like sometimes do you go back to your memories and feel a hollow warmth? i mean with all that you told me about him, and how differently you perceive him, i know you see so much more ,its hauntingly incredible. you can't help him anymore, or your thoughts wont reach him but like maybe among the stars he'd feel good realizing all along someone saw his true uncut self, the potential that perhaps wasn't visible to him, someone willing to help out of what drained and perished him, it'd make him happy and seen. and it'd be good if he soon becomes a healthy comic relief, his presence will still be in around you, in a way thats not gloomy ig

(also , my humor is pretty questionable and troublesome too, no worries , the more you get to know me, the more cricket noises you here in your daily life) (its not a metaphor, its me asserting my presence)

i spoke aloooot ik ik ik

also like, ik that part where i talked about my little floofy wish is cringe, and trust me i dont talk that irl apart from my bestfriends, i physically can't talk about it, its embarassing ik. but online we're all in our unseen selves and idk it takes 1 (one) matchstick to ignite a nice bonfire so like , that part, is a beautiful representation of how dumb i can get, forgive me m'kay, tall guy will prolly go into my list of highschool crushes who gave me entertainment for a time being

i thinkni am attracted to people who have such grandiosity in their range of knowledge and just smart in general, such an admirable trait

[theunconcernedembalmer]

Aesop Carl, {the embalmer exorcist, death’s receptionist gatekeeper}, at your service.

<<100 follower Exorcist event: start. Ask box open>>

[bangtangalicious]

bts smut recs | theme: manipulation

there is something so alluring about the subtle naivety that comes with manipulation. from a reader’s perspective, seeing the character get manipulated/coerced/lured is super interesting to me. watching how they fall for the tactics of the person doing the manipulating. the way they use power, guilt, words and actions to twist the readers minds. here are some fics that do this so fucking well & why im literally obsessed with them. tw: yandere, manipulation, gaslighting, SMUT. 18+ nsfw. i will be adding to this as i find more!

—little lamb so pure let me taint you by @voidswan | this, and its sequel, both loss-of-innocence, manipulative masterpieces. CANNOT STRESS THIS ENOUGH. i read this multiple times a week because i can never get over it. taehyungs a lil sneaky bitch and is fucked up. its so well written how he plots and gets her to becoming willing. making her watch p*rn. confusing her. reader goes to him like ~can we do those things brother n sisters do~ fuck. bye. im deceased. | taehyung x reader

—happenstance by @chimoona | this is in my hall of fame of best fics ever. like the concept is super niche, ive never read anything like it. jimin lures oc with how he stalks her on twitter and promises her a manic vinyl. its done so well. the smut is extremelyyyyy hot. unparalleled. rough. this jimin has me weakkkkkk idk what it is like he just goes for it and its dizzying and brilliant. they have a little text exchange too and oc is hot for him and he teases her over it and the way his dialogue is im just - its just - really hot ok | jimin x reader —honey & milk by @cosmostae | im sure yall have already read this but i cannot understate how brilliant it is. the way tae just keeps going and oc has no idea whats going on but she feels so good aw byEEEE. a key manipulative action is to be like- let me do this- and push aside the consequences after. and he does this. and i love it. lol. | taehyung x reader —daddy 2 by @voidswan | if it isnt obvious already, i really like voidswan’s work. fucking AMAZING. literally one of the reasons i even got on this app. this story, the way jungkook just gets in her head ughhhh. and taehyung just rolls up like oh hey. looool. part 1 is awesome too, i like how jk doesnt expect her to be willing but he’s bossy and shameless and hot | jungkook x reader —loose ends by @scribblemetae | this was one of the very first yandere fics i ever read. and this is some of the best smut i have ever read in my existence as a breathing human. this is WILD and i fucking love it. jimin goes crazyyyyyy on oc and she takes it as she fucking should. they way he lures her in. she has no idea who he is from her past at first. amazing. | jimin x reader —a thriller film by @taechaos | i respect authors who are able to give adequate buildup in a oneshot, and this is a PRIME example. the plot sucks you in, its vindictive, thrilling, subtle but so sexy. again jungkook lures her in subtely. also the character (reader) is so interesting and unique in this idk. LOL its good go read it | jungkook x reader —let the villain win by @lemonjoonah | same thing- the build up is IMMACULATE. this joon. sinister. sexy. this is also a full ass thriller. very creatively done. the use of the book and how she reads it and the end while it happens is so fucking cool. i get goosebumps.  | namjoon x reader —cut by @deepdarkdelights | this is a yandere masterpiece. read that again. like this is the sort of yandere type i vibe with a lot. power dynamic manipulation. also my exhibitionist ass loves that they’re literally being watched by a room full of people and she just takes it and she likes it and ugh this actor!taehyung is sexy ok and like how the movie plot is his obsession too love that | taehyung x reader —allegiance by @taequois | i cant even put into words why i love this so much but its so good. the smut is fantastic. he just fucks her like, idk if this makes sense- but just how unexpected and surprised she is like contributes to why its hot. and then possessive!kook is a wholeeee mood in itself | jungkook x reader

if you know of any other fics that fit this subgenre // niche please feel free to send them in!! im always looking for new reads :) i will be posting more rec lists following other oddly specific tropes so that you can find fics you like :))))))))))) sorry if my comments are chaotic. lmao. have a wonderful day <3

[beesmygod]

thank you SA newspaper comic thread for informing me of what newspaper comics are doing

recent events in the newspaper comic “mary worth” (yes, the one about the old woman you skip over if you’re one of the 50 americans still reading newspaper comics) have been downright thrilling. local despised bastard wilbur finally bit the big one after drunkenly falling off of a cruise ship after another stupid fight with that stupid broad estelle. everyone on planet earth is pleased with this development, most of all the comics kingdom (the parent company) store, which is producing the best merch in honor of this event. i literally need this shirt or i’ll die.

for a mere $72.00 you can celebrate the happiest moment of your life

additionally, the 55-80 year old age bracket that reads mary worth (that aren’t ironic/not ironic fans from longtime comics staple the comics curmudgeon) is elated over this development. imagine bloodthirsty posts from the crowd that loves minion memes on facebook. ive done you a service of picking the non-horrifying ones.

love this discussion on the science of wilbur visiting davey jones’ locker.

but that’s not why i’m here. well, not entirely. i wanted to talk about two other insane instances in newspaper comics in the “modern day”. the first is the like, entirety of the 2017 comic arc of “the phantom”, a pulp hero comic strip about a guy in a purple costume who does both annoying and useful things in a fictional african country that’s been running daily since the 30s. this story, called “the phantom stamp”, involves a guy who is just orson welles but he wants to make a stamp of the local urban legend....THE PHANTOM!!

the phantom doesnt like that.

his whole thing is not drawing attention to himself unless necessary. so the phantom must arrive to make business negotiations.

by which i mean “call upon his native friends to have a laugh torturing this guy for 24 hours and repeatedly dousing him with hallucinogens”

im going somewhere with this i promise. anyway, when its just the phantom and his very high captive, orson is permitted to make his case for his stupid stamp everyone told him not to make.

which in turn leads to the funniest series of panels ive seen in a long time.

this last one is much shorter bc to chronicle the entire event would take forever. in 2019, a goon (something awful forums member for baby readers) named vargo who did a moderately critical quote tweet of the combination of the official mark trail and artist/writer james allen’s personal account. of the conservative slant, climate change denial in a comic about a nature lover, and lazy traced clip art. allen self annihilated immediately

and then again when this event wormed its way into the script

and then repeatedly and endlessly over the next year as he drew an entire storyline where a guy who looked suspiciously like vargo took mark trail and that lady who’s always with him on a wild goose chase looking for a yeti he claims bit off his leg. not-vargo wants fame...and FORTUNE!

anyway he dies in a bitch way in an avalanche chasing a noise he thought was a yeti and then is memorialized as a sensationalist liar

james allen was fired shortly after this for making a blowjob joke about AOC for literally no reason. he just did that i guess. no one working comics is known for their brains

thanks for reading!

[howaboutleeches]

Ive never sent an ask before so im not sure if it will work but how about the Arcana main 6 with a seamstress Mc :)

How would the Main Six React to a seamstress MC!

Asra:

🔮 Asra could go hours and hours just watching you sewing, putting pieces together, and working on your machine. He found it mesmerizing how skilled you were, his eyes focused on every hand movement of yours.

🔮 The sound of your machine calmed him down, and he could fall asleep on a couch next to your working space, the one he had prepared specially for you and your craft. Enough lightening to make your job easier, any materials you may need and a comfortable chair to keep you comfortable.

🔮 Once you started working, Faust paid attention to you as well. She would slither up your desk or your back and watch closely, her big eyes shining as she watched you working. "Friend, work hard!"

🔮 Asra didn't want to ask for it, but if you made something for him, he would keep it around him all the time. Wearing, wrapping around his neck, around his waist, he wouldn't let it go.

🔮 Even better if you made something for Faust as well. Maybe something matching for the three of you? It would definitely put a smile on his face and make Faust's tail wiggle in excitement.

Nadia:

👑 No matter how she came to know about your skill, either you telling her or she figuring it out on her own, she became very excited about it. "I've always admired seamstresses! I tried sewing once but I just didn't have enough skill to seek it further", she would say as she grabbed your hands, caressing them as if trying to feel the power coming from them.

👑 Not even a week later, she grabbed you by the arm and led you across the halls of the palace, until she stopped in front of a room, a bright smile on her face. She opened the door to reveal a room filled with fabrics, sewing machines, mannequins, and many other items that made your heart skip a bit.

👑 That was her way of showing how much she appreciated your work. Contributing with her money to help you have the best environment (and products) to pursue your sewing career.

👑 She would ask you to make her outfits and brag to other royals and her own family about how good you were. It didn't take long for you to start receiving requests from other kingdoms and from her relatives as well.

👑 She just wants to see you happy, and knowing she helped you with it also fills up her sense of pride. Don't get me wrong, she didn't do it so she could brag about it, but she likes to know her help took part in your happiness.

Julian:

♠️ When he came to know about what you did, he was beyond thrilled. He started to bombard you with the most various questions regarding your profession, how long you have been doing that, who taught you, and what kind of things you could make.

♠️ Although he felt a little embarrassed to ask for it, he would gather enough courage to do some stuff for him, if you wanted to and had the time, of course. Custom eyepatches would be his top request.

♠️ Eventually, he also started asking for costume capes. He got so excited when you would walk into the room waving a brand new cape, almost like a child receiving a Christmas gift.

♠️ He would often bring you books about sewing, and beautiful fabrics he bought with a discount, calling it his "contribution". The thing is, he felt guilty for asking you to do eyepatches and capes for him, but he felt so good wearing something you made, he couldn't help it!

♠️ Whenever your machine would have any sort of issue, he would rush to your aid and try to fix the situation, even if you knew how to do it yourself. He just loved being useful and getting a kiss on the cheek as a reward for his good deeds.

Muriel:

🌿 He and Inanna were curious regarding your machine. When it started to make noises, Inanna growled a little at it, but seeing it was harmless, she decided to approach and sniff. Soon, she started to enjoy the noises.

🌿 Muriel on the other hand had a frown on his face, saying he didn't like it. He actually didn't have anything against the machine itself, but he started feeling jealous of it. You spent so much time working on it, he felt left out.

🌿 You ended up noticing that and decided to set up a corner next to your working table where he could rest close to you and the fireplace as well. After that, his complaints stropped.

🌿 He sometimes went out to gather some flowers he found in the forest, hoping you could use them when sewing. He always tried to get the brightest and best smelling ones, saying they would look good on you.

🌿 If you made something for Inanna, he would think about proposing to you on the spot. Inanna has been his companion for a long time, and if you cared about her enough to do something nice for her out of genuine kindness, he would know you're the right one.

Portia:

🐈 After finding out about you being a seamstress, she bothered Mazelinka for days so she could give her an old sewing machine she had in her house and other sewing materials that were buried deep into her house. Even if they were there for a long time, they were still very good quality.

🐈 She loved to watch you sewing, finding the sound of the machine extremely relaxing. She also pulled Pepi into her lap to watch you, which she did with wide eyes, following every movement of your hand with her gaze.

🐈 Portia one day asked if you could make something for Pepi, which you agreed to. As a surprise, you made matching sweaters for Pepi and Portia, which made her tear up in joy.

🐈She always bragged about your work to Nadia, saying you were, without a doubt, the best seamstress in the entire city of Vesuvia, the whole world even! She was extremely proud of you and wasn't afraid to show it to anyone.

Lucio:

🐐At first, he tried to convince you to pursue another career path. He said you were royalty now, and royalty didn't have to sew, they had other people to do that for them. It slightly annoyed him that you were doing something that someone else could take off your shoulders.

🐐As he watched you work though, his opinion started to slowly change. He saw the effort and love you put into it, and the beautiful pieces you created. He slowly started to fall in love with it.

🐐He secretly ordered a sewing machine for himself, thinking that it should be easy to sew. Then, he would show you his final work and you would awe and praise him. At least that was his plan, but after twenty minutes of trying to get the machine to work, he gave up.

🐐 He swallowed his pride, something he has only done three times in his life (he kept count of it), and went to you, asking you to teach him how to sew. The smile on his face when he made a scarf was priceless. He paraded it around the castle, making sure that everyone knew he had done it himself. And that you, his amazing and talented partner, had taught him how.

-----------------------------------------------

Well, I've been absent for a good while now, I'm not even sure no one reads my stuff anymore, but if someone still does, here ya go! I hope you enjoy this (◠‿◠✿)

I plan on being more active, maybe posting once a week.

tag list

@the-chaos-siblings @angelyuji @diamondlight301 @antipositiva @alliespec @euphorically-bisexual @v--o-i--d @llavender-tae @iarychachy @sonofahell @sluttiestestablishment @esdtvbjikmkkjbvvh @mycomancer @spinehoarder @blackrose8425 @prettyorangepineapple @anjhope1 @updatedautopsyrep0rt

If you want to be added to the tag list, go interact on my pinned post so I can know  😉 💖

[twodimecastle]

fifty bucks & six months.

spencer reid x gender neutral reader new relationship, secret keeping nonsense, 4.5k words, ao3 a/n; turns out i love writing texting fic but tumblr destroys the formatting rip

zero months.

You smile conspiratorially, extending a pinkie towards Spencer and he gives you a skeptical look.

“You know the odds of being found out immediately are-” he starts, but you cut him off.

“Astronomical, I know. I know. But don’t you think it’ll be fun to see how long we can push it?” you wheedle, not caring that your voice sounds more like begging than is strictly dignified because seeing the way Spencer’s nose crinkles in amusement at your heavy handed persuasion is too adorable to pass up. You scoot closer on the couch, tapping the end of his nose with your pinkie finger, letting him catch your hand between his as you continue “I think we’ve got a good shot at hiding it for a little while. It would be like a game.”

Spencer draws your captive hand to his lips, brushing them across your knuckles and watching fondly as you forge ahead in your campaign to persuade him, enjoying the show and the attention too much to tell you he’s already on board. Your eyes are shining with the prospect of the caper, and you’ve made no move to take your hand back from him, and Spencer’s pretty sure he’d be more than happy to sit with you in this moment forever. “I mean-” you go on, gesturing animatedly with your free hand, “you’re like-a really good liar when you want to be. And everyone else always forgets how good you are at it.”

He snorts at that and the sound makes you light up, eyes tracking the arch of his brows, the warmth in his soft brown eyes, memorising the way he looks like this; utterly unbothered, completely at ease. It might be your favourite version of him, but that race has always been a tight one with no clear winner in sight. You have lots of favourite versions of Spencer. Twisting your hand in his, you tangle your fingers together, savouring the way you feel his thumb glide delicately along your skin and the unhidden joy in his face at the simple show of affection.

Time to play your trump card.

“$50 says we can hide it from the whole group for at least six months. If everyone figures it out before then, you win. But if not everyone has worked it out by then, I win.”

The mischievous shine in your eyes is irresistible, and Spencer smiles, disentangling one of his hands from yours to extend his own pinky finger.

“You’re on.”

The words barely make it out of his mouth before you’re colliding with him, pressing your lips to his.

two months.

“So, how long has this whole thing been going on?” Derek’s question catches Spencer off guard, and, based on the way he can see you freeze in his peripheral vision, takes you by surprise as well. Sliding into the driver's seat of the SUV, Derek continues “I hope you didn’t think you were gonna be able to keep me in the dark for long, pretty boy. You should know better than that.”

Following mechanically after him, Spencer takes the passenger seat, trying to frame his next statement as carefully as possible as he hears your door close and the car start. “We were-going to tell you guys-” he begins uncomfortably, glancing back to you for support, but you look just as on edge as he feels. “We were just gonna-keep it to ourselves for a while-before telling Hotch and everything-” he tries again, the mounting tension levering his shoulders higher and higher with every passing moment, but then Derek just laughs, shaking his head.

“Hey, I’m happy for you, kid. For both of you.” He spares a look at you in the back seat through the rear view mirror, and you can feel the tension in your jaw relax, the furrows in your brow straightening out at the note of approval in Derek’s voice. “I’m glad you two finally figured it out,” he says, fondly, and you laugh.

“I bet Spence we could keep it from you guys at least six months,” you explain, reaching forwards through the centre console to link your pinky with Spencer’s, and the touch of your hand releases the last of the tension he had been harbouring as he covers your hand with the other one of his own. He knows Derek clocks the motion, filing it away in his mind somewhere, but he doesn’t care about the scrutiny so much right now. Not when your hand is so warm and comfortable in his.

Derek reaches for the dial on the radio and flicks through the channel, thinking about something, and as you watch, a slow mischievous smirk spreads across his face a moment later before he glances first at Spencer and then at you.

“I’ll tell you what,” he says to you, and Spencer can feel a familiar grin tugging at his own lips as he watches a plan take shape in his friend’s eyes. “I’m happy to sit on this information for a while for a cut of the winnings from whichever one of you comes out on top.” He snorts good naturedly as he continues “I have my own bet to win with Prentiss, so if you two help me win that one, I’ll cut you in too.”

“A quid pro quo of sorts,” Spencer says slowly, and he feels your fingers tighten around his, as you snort softly, and he knows instinctually you’re grinning the same way you always do when you’re winning a game. “I think we can do that.”

Derek grins, turning the music up as he nods, eyes on the road. “Then you two love birds have got yourselves a deal.”

two months and two weeks.

PG: youre not as slick as you think you are ;)

YN: ???

PG: ;))))))))) you should invest in some concealer for your work bag sweetness or tell the good doctor to pay more attention to whats visible in your work clothes

YN: oh my fucking god wait how do you even know thats how that happened

PG: im all knowing and all seeing im like the omnipotent goddess of the fbi

YN: derek blabbed

PG: he sang like a canary but also im an omnipotent goddess im also totally clued in on the whole bet situation with em so for the low low price of every single juicy detail about how this adorableness went down you can buy my silence :)

YN: im getting derek decaf coffee on all coffee runs from now on >:( traitors dont get caffeine

PG: darling sweet angel i need deets all of them like immediately

YN: >:( fine ok so. after that case down in georgia a few months ago? the weird one? with the creepy mother son thing?

PG: omg yuck pls dont remind me im here for the CUTENESS not the MURDER

YN: sorryyyyyyy anyway so spence was like being super weird about it all on the plane and whatever but he was doing that super annoying thing where he ignores it and says hes fine so everyone leaves him alone

PG: YEAH why does everyone here do that ALL THE TIME its SO annoyingggg

YN: ikr its insufferable and like super not subtle ANYWAY. spence was being weird and whatever and i just. refused to let him sulk on his own or whatever like i could tell there was something bothering him and so after work i insisted that we were gonna get like shitty diner food or whatever and watch a movie and he knows better than to say no to me

PG: smart boy

YN: so we got fries and milkshakes and then went back to his place to watch a movie and he was still like weird and silent and like brooding yknow? but whatever just figured hed talk about it when he was ready so i put on a movie and offered to make popcorn and then he was just staring at me and he looked so SAD and TIRED and i thought id done something wrong like the poor guy looked like he was gonna cry and i was panicking over fucking popcorn and then he says ‘why are you always so nice to me?’

PG: oh my god hes like if a sad victorian orphan was actually a triplicate phd holder

YN: i was SO thrown off i was like spencer. spencer were best friends. ive been forcing you to hang out with me for years now why do you THINK im being nice to you its bc i care about you asshole and then. like after another million years after letting me sweat it out over whether hes about to cry for like fucking years the asshole grabs my hand and says. i shit you not. ‘you know im in love with you, right?’ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PG: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YN: anyway hes my boyfriend now :’) dont tell anyone tho gotta win the bet

four months.

Lingering by the elevator, you glance around at the uncharacteristically silent office building, waiting for Spencer to leave the bullpen. The sound of his footfalls drawing nearer makes you smile and you mentally applaud yourself for suggesting the two of you remained behind after disembarking from the plane, taking advantage of the manufactured privacy to take the same car home, back to his apartment.

When he sees you waiting for him, he can’t help the soft fond smile that tugs at his face, as he reaches for your hand, sliding his fingers into yours with a gentle squeeze, the quiet of the building allowing him to indulge in the show of affection. You return the squeeze, leaning your head on his shoulder with a yawn and as he presses a fond kiss to your temple he’s rewarded by a sleepy hum of approval from you that sends a rush of quiet joy shooting through him.

“At least we won’t be sleeping in hotel beds again tonight,” you say, voice weary, and Spencer nods as he shuffles you into the elevator. The doors slide shut and the elevator starts to move and in the moment of absolute privacy, you steal a kiss, tilting your chin up to catch his lips with yours, revelling in the soft huff of surprise he lets out, even as he smiles against your mouth. Even after months, the simple act of kissing Spencer still feels new and thrilling somehow, like you can’t quite believe it’s something you’re allowed to do.

His nose brushes yours and he breathes “unless something big comes up, we get a sleep in tomorrow too,” and the way you beam at him sends his heart racing in his chest, unable to look away from the fondness shining in your eyes.

As the two of you exit the elevator and make your way through the Bureau car park, you tuck yourself against his side, wedging yourself under his arm with a happy sigh, eager to get yourself horizontal and asleep as fast as possible. Spencer brushes his lips against your temple again as the two of you close in on his car, almost free and clear of the office when a voice behind the two of you brings you up short.

“Reid?”

Spencer is reacting before his mind catches up, turning on his heel towards the sound of Hotch’s voice echoing through the parking lot, conscious of the incriminating way you’re still tucked against his side, even as his brain is rifling frantically through any possible excuses for the current circumstances.

“Hotch-” you step away from Spencer, cheeks flaming, not wanting to chance a look at him. “I-we-thought everyone else had gone home,” you trail off lamely, trying your hardest not to balk under Hotch’s ominously impassive scrutiny. A second passes, then another, and the short silence feels like months, or years even as the three of you stand locked in a stalemate.

“I take it the two of you would prefer to keep this under wraps?” He asks, finally, and it registers with Spencer, somewhat belatedly, that Hotch’s tone isn’t admonishing. It isn’t enough to dissipate the tension coiling in Spencer’s muscles just yet, but he spares a glance at you as he nods, and a moment later, Hotch gives the two of you a curt nod of his own. “I’ll tell you what,” he says, a shade of irony colouring his voice. “If you two fill out the paperwork for in-team relationships for me, I’ll keep it to myself. I understand privacy is hard to come by in our office.”

The words take a while to fully sink in, and you’re conscious that you’re standing there blinking and gaping at your boss like a bemused fish for a good few seconds before you’ve composed yourself enough to say “absolutely, sir. Of course. Thank you.”

Hotch nods again, heading towards his own car, and as he passes the two of you, a brief smile flashes across his face.

“Congratulations, you two. Get some sleep.”

four months and three weeks.

Spencer isn’t sure how late it is, but he knows you’re not asleep yet, the faint glow of your phone screen casting faint distorted shadows across his room as your free hand rests lightly on his chest. In the dark blue twilight of his room, the space feels undefined and dream like somehow, the line between his mind and his surroundings blurry or indistinct somehow, and as you huff out a near silent laugh at something on the screen in your hand, a thought rises to the surface of his thoughts like flotsam on an unwanted tide.

The more clinical part of his mind notes the autonomic response in his body, the way his heart lurches unpleasantly in his chest, heart rate rising with an influx of cortisol through his nervous system, automatically rifling through ways to control the anxiety response. Age old instinct surges forwards, starting to push his spiralling anxiety down out of sight so as not to bother you with it, but then your hand shifts infinitesimally on his chest, fingers curling in the soft fabric of his pyjama shirt, and for once his body is miles ahead of his brilliant mind, your name is leaving his lips before he’s really aware of it happening.

Your gaze flashes up from your phone at the sound of his voice, soft and hesitant, and you let the screen go dark as you set it down. You can feel Spencer’s heart hammering against his ribs under your palm, and your brows knit together in concern as you shift closer to his side, tracing gentle circles over his shirt with your fingertips, the repetitive motion intended to soothe, though you’re not sure if it’s for his benefit or yours.

“Yeah, baby?” You ask softly, working hard to keep the rising worry from your voice. After three years of friendship and almost six months of dating, you know him well enough to sense when his propensity for overthinking and catastrophizing is slipping out of his control. You can feel his chest rise as he inhales sharply, whatever he’s about to say cut off by second guessing, doing nothing to pacify your concern. “Spence? Is everything okay?” You ask again.

“This-bet-hiding our relationship-it’s-” he trails off, throat tight as he rolls onto his side, facing away from you, and smushing his face into the pillow, already wishing he hadn’t said anything. You’re the kindest person he’s ever met, but offering up this kind of raw insecurity feels like pulling teeth. Even if it’s you. Especially if it’s you. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to find out if you care about him enough to stay when his racing mind gets the better of him. The pillow muffles his voice as he says “never mind.”

You feel your own heart rate tic up in response to that, matching the wild beat of Spencer’s that you could feel under your palm only a second ago. “Baby, talk to me. What’s on your mind?”

He shakes his head, face still hidden in the pillow. “It’s stupid.”

He can feel the rush of your breath on his back as you sigh, and your voice is almost achingly patient as you say softly “it’s not stupid if it matters to you.” There’s a long pause, and you press yourself against his back, settling close and letting your hand slide over his side to rest on his chest, the heat of his skin sinking into yours even through his thin shirt. In spite of his height, he feels so small as you wrap yourself around him, drawing closer, trying to reassure him without yet knowing what he needs to be reassured of. “Spence?”

“Are you ashamed of-being with me? Is that why you want to hide it?” The words are almost whispered, the sound almost lost against his pillow and your heart sinks, plummeting faster and further than if you’d dropped it off the side of a skyscraper. You should’ve known he might worry about that, should have realised it might have felt that way. Remorse rises hot and bitter in your throat and you swallow it down, trying to steady your voice.

“Spencer. Sweetheart. No. Never. I could never be ashamed. I love you. I’m so sorry.” Your arms wrap more tightly around him and you bury your face against the crook of his neck, the tension you can feel in every inch of his body making you feel more cruel and short-sighted than you already do. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise it might feel like that. I could never be ashamed of being with you, Spence. You’re my favourite person.” He takes the kind of shaky, shallow breath that comes with trying not to cry and your heart breaks a little more as one of his hands slowly moves to cover yours where it rests against his chest, just over his heart.

As his hand rests over yours, his thumb strokes lightly along your knuckles, and he knows you know him well enough to notice the way his hand trembles, just a little, because then your hand is shifting against his, turning to clumsily tangle your fingers with his, holding tighter to him as he tries to collect himself, drawing in a deep, shuddering breath as his eyes squeeze shut. He can hear the contrition in your voice as you say softly “I’ve never really liked having people know everything about what’s going on in my life. And I love our friends but-something like this, that’s so-special? So new? I wanted to be able to keep it to just us for a while.”

“I’m sorry.” His voice comes out a little shaky, scarcely more than a whisper, and it’s more than you can take as you pull back and gently force him to roll over to face you. He’s not crying, but his eyes are glassy and you recognise the fight to keep the tears unshed in the tight set of his jaw and the hard line of his lips. Leaning on your elbow, you lift your free hand to gently smooth out the furrows of his brow, letting your fingers linger along the planes of his face.

“Why are you sorry,” you ask gently. “You don’t need to be sorry, baby. Not for talking to me about things that bother you. We can tell everyone else tomorrow, if you want? We can call off the bet. Derek will live. If he’s got a problem with it I’ll turn all his shirts into crop tops.”

He can tell the joke is a last bid attempt to make him smile, to ease his fear, and it works. In spite of the anxious weight in his chest that feels like it’s pressing him into the mattress, Spencer laughs weakly, meeting your eyes, and he watches as a relieved smile breaks across your face, releasing your lower lip from where you’d trapped it worriedly between your teeth. The unmitigated affection that floods into your eyes renders him momentarily breathless as he takes in the moment. You’re still here, still trying to take care of him. Just as kind and steadfast as ever.

“No,” he says eventually, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you down on top of him like a living weighted blanket, letting your warmth chase the bulk of the tension from his body and luxuriating in the way you curl into him, one hand sliding into his hair. “We shouldn’t call off the bet. We still have to take Emily’s money, remember?”

Your sleepy laugh is the last thing he hears before his eyes close and the feel of your body wound around his lulls him to sleep.

five months.

SR: Can I talk to you about something?

DM: you dying or something? that’s a really fuckin ominous text to recieve out of the blue

SR: I’m not dying, why would that be what you assumed? I just have a question.

DM: just a figure of speech but what’s up?

SR: It’s about your bet with Emily. What’re the terms for it?

DM: wym?

SR: What exactly did you two make the bet about? What needs to happen in order for you to win the bet?

DM: does this count as collusion?

SR: Technically yes, but calling it collusion implies a certain degree of illegality.

DM: whatever anyway the terms i made with em were that you’d make some kind of move before your birthday but she reckoned you were gonna need some kind of near death experience to do anything about your crush why?

SR: I’m just making sure I have all the information.

DM: what’s going on pretty boy? you planning something?

SR: Maybe.

DM: not a helpful answer reid is everything good?

SR: Everything’s fine. We’re just figuring some stuff out. Nothing to worry about.

DM: is there something you’re not telling me?

SR: Don’t worry about it.

five months, three weeks and six days.

In the chaos that was the scramble from the briefing room to the jet, you haven’t yet had the chance to speak to Spencer about the outcome of his most recent thesis defence panel. By the time you’ve got a moment to breathe, the jet is underway, coasting across the country towards Montana, the whole team settled in for the six hour flight. You corner him in the tiny kitchen area of the jet as he’s making a mug of mediocre coffee, fingers tapping out an absent minded rhythm on the countertop as the coffee machine whirs, clearly not paying attention to anything outside of his head.

“Hey, boy genius.” He jumps, whirling around, eyes wide with surprise, and you smile fondly. “So?” You demand, and Spencer raises an eyebrow in confusion. You snort, rolling your eyes as you elaborate. “Your defence panel. Did it go okay?”

You’re shifting your weight and fidgeting restlessly with the belt loops on your pants and as he studies you for a moment, it occurs to Spencer that you’re nervous for him over this outcome. The thought brings an almost giddy smile to his face.

“You know this isn’t my first thesis defence panel, right?” He says mildly, deliberately burying the lede, enjoying the way you scowl in irritation too much to answer your question right away, too enamoured with this display of concern on his behalf.

“Don’t be difficult, Doctor Reid. It’s still a big deal.” He just shrugs noncommittally, and you huff, swatting his arm lightly. “So did it go well?” You ask again, eyes narrowing as you try to dissect his microexpressions, trying to discern the answer he seems determined to keep from you for yourself. A few seconds later, he relents.

“I can now add degree number six to my wall.” He confirms. Getting degrees doesn’t hold the same rush of pride for him now, the accomplishment feeling somewhat less exceptional as he acquires more of them, but the way your face lights up with pride for him reminds him how special the things he’s capable of can be. You’ve always made him feel like more than the sum of his parts somehow, like something infinitely more precious than he always assumed he is.

“I fucking knew it. That’s amazing, Spence,” you say, chest warm and full with pride and love, and his almost shy smile in return is enough to make a decision for you in a split second. Your hand dips into your back pocket, drawing something out, and you carefully hide it from view in your palm as Spencer tracks the motion curiously with his eyes.

Your eyes are shining with affection and something that looks like mischief and the way you’re smiling at him is more than enough to divert his attention as you step closer, just barely noticing as you slip something into his hand. You’re dangerously, distractingly close now, and he’s conscious, if somewhat distantly, that neither of you is concealed from the rest of the team, scant meters away in the seating area of the jet. But you’re smiling and close enough for him to feel your breath on his face and suddenly your lips are on his, and even after nearly seven months of being able to touch you like this, it’s enough to make him forget everything else as he melts into the contact, savouring the warmth of your skin and the faint smell of your shampoo.

You pull back a second later, the kiss over almost as soon as it started, but it’s enough to attract attention, and you can hear a belated ‘oh SHIT’ from Emily in the main cabin of the jet. In your peripheral vision, you can see money changing hands, your friends scrambling to react, but you don’t look at them, choosing to enjoy the bemused, affectionate look on Spencer’s face as his brain catches up to the events unfolding around the two of you.

“I was tired of keeping it a secret,” you say fondly, loud enough only for him to hear. “You win.”

Blinking in confusion, he finally tears his gaze away from yours, fingers uncurling to reveal the fifty dollar bill you had pressed into his palm right before you kissed him. The penny drops and he snorts with laughter, shaking his head in half hearted indignation as his other arm loops around you, pulling you in, letting you rest your head on his shoulder, hiding your face from the rest of the team as he kisses your temple, revelling in the way you wind yourself around him in response.

“I was gonna do this in like two days. I wanted you to win,” he murmurs against your hairline, and he can feel your faint laughter.

“Too bad, baby. I’m used to getting my way,” you say, pulling back to steal another quick kiss before peeling yourself out of his arms with a wink, turning to face the onslaught of ‘care to fucking explain that’ and ‘I fucking told you so’ from the rest of your friends, tugging him with you by your joined hands.

[shameboree]

hey kels i was scrolling through my dash and then i caught a glimpse of your new fallon drawing and i want you to know that i went absolutely buckwild and then i scrolled further to see the whole drawing and i'm pretty sure i squealed. kels ever since ive started following you and your art and fallon have slowly nestled yourself inside my brain its amazing how excited i get whenever u upload a new drawing. also ive noticed that i'm slowly but surely starting to sound more and more unhinged and wild like you. how the fuck do you have so much influence on me. 

ALSO i love the new fallon drawing!! you are so right blue gold and white are just her colours they fit her v well!! and i love how much texture you used throughout the whole drawing and her shoes are AWESOME!! also love the whole winter fairy-ish vibe <3

ALSO i was wondering if you could like sort of,, idk explain your drawing process on this drawing? like if you did the colouring first or the lineart and stuff bc i just love how it turned out and id love to try something similar!!

AW!!! i am so hype for my awful girl to be Enjoyed so much!! she is my favorite dressup doll i love to play barbies with her most of all heheh. also i am THRILLED that my Unhinged and Unwell nature have rubbed off on u. i know i am a Strong personality and it makes me V POLARIZING (i am either LOVED or LOATHED i havent met many ppl who are just like meh abt me. i am an Experience) and its always a DELIGHT when someone finds my feral animal traits endearing or positive and kind of picks up on them. i think because life is short that we should all be as bananas as we please at any point in time. PURE ID HERE BABY

AND TY TY!! my girl has a strong aesthetic and this piece kind of went a liiiiittle against some of that (its a lot of hard angles vs i normally give her a lot of ovals and rounded edges) but for the setting its appropriate bc im trying to give her a bit more of a """"harsh"""" or """"severe"""" vibe (like as harsh and severe as she can possibly look which isnt very). i LOVE to use texture brushes they are such an easy way to get out of drawing details myself because i am SO lazy!!

okay i “”answered”” this i GUESS technically because i typed words in response but its a whole lot of jack shit so like. here ya go. SORRY PAL. 

here are some more shoes as u can see i basically draw her in the same ones always except when i draw her in a plugsuit

OKAY THE DRAW IN QUESTION i kind of cheated on bc i literally just traced over one of my older draws i did for a very obscure au i made of who made me a princess (i am always doing such ridiculously niche shit i love to sit in my little sandbox and have no one else understand my barbie rps) BUT the process is the same as basically every draw i do like this. it is very simple so dont worry (or do, maybe)

i use 1-3 layers at a time and then immediately merge when i feel like im done and LIVE W MY MISTAKES if not!! anyway prepare to be massively underwhelmed heh

this is so funny i cant believe i literally traced my own drawing im a fuckin FRAUD im the laziest bitch i know. anyway. my sketches are way messier than this but it always starts out either scratch ass lines or color blocking w this bright ass magenta bc thats what feels right!!!!!!

HERES THE LAYERS I USED LOL i do all textures n shit as a clipping mask so actually i used 4 layers for this bc id set down one texture or pattern that was gonna overlap on a diff layer so i wouldnt have to work harder to erase and then BLINDLY MERGED to make things more difficult if actually i fucked up before that!!! work smarter not harder except when it is absolutely braindead to do otherwise is my motto

IF IM DOIN SMTH NICER like this then i usually make sure all my lines connect (this is also why i do a lot of angles and simple clear shapes when i draw) so i can set that layer as reference and USE THE FUCKING FILL TOOL BAYBEEEEE!!!!! this also makes it easier to fuck around with COLOR imho bc you can just rapidly swatch with zero efforts. i Love to take shortcuts. i Love to be lazy. i HIGHLY rec this, if i have colored smth that stays in the lines then its bc i connected the lineart and used the bucket fill underneath. if my lines dont connect sometimes ill make a temp line and erase after i filled. im dedicated. ALSO u can see here that my patterns layer is all overlapping and fucked up bc i didnt check and erase fully but i use p limited palettes in general so... IT DIDNT MATTER THIS TIME!!!!!!!!. 

anyway after all that i lock the lineart layer if i havent already and color some of the lines for some PIZAZZ. easy way to immediately fake effort i do love to do that

HERES AN ACTUALLY MESSY SKETCH:

 i do all of my fucking draws on the same canvas bc im a horrible little beast, so the only reason i didnt erase the sketch and use it for the colors layer was bc there were others on that layer already and i didnt wanna scoot them so i could cap the finished draw. i did NOT connect my lines for this one i colored like a toddler. who gives a shit we all die in the end anyway!!! 

YOU DIDNT ASK FOR THIS BUT LINELESS MY LOVE... i just color blocked for this one alas i do not have process caps, i will do that next time i draw i guess if anyone wants that!!? i typically only use a single layer for lineless- block out the shape, alpha lock, then color and carve from there. EASY PEASY!! ive shown it before but i spent all my formative draw years on v limited feature programs (mspaint, oekaki, TEGAKI MOST OF ALL) so i dont explore tools much and do what seems easiest and most intuitive to me... im sorry i dont have any sick tricks or real process i am but a feral little clown drawing in the DIRT. also here is the tegaki overlay i use whenever i am Blocked or fatigued w procreate layout. it makes me feel NOSTALGIC and INSPIRED so i do this instead of like, actually getting on tegs2

this ended up long as fuck and FOR WHAT?? its just 10 images and several paragraphs of “sorry im the laziest fucker ALIVE”

[jangofctts]

omg I just read so much of your writing and I’m 🥺🥰🥲🥵 the absolute royalty shit that we see here today. i’ve recently discovered I am very into ~thigh riding~ so do u have any thots on how our boys (especially our clone babes) feel about it? much obliged

IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS ALL DAY KEJHKJRH SO HERE YOU GO OMG

boba: yEs--boba absolutely adORES when you crawl into his lap and straddle his thigh. he’ll either pat his lap and invite you up or it’s one of those times when he’s intentionally ignoring you and you have force your way onto his lap so he has to pay attention. imo the first time you ride his thigh you weren't intending to, you wanted to fuck him but with boba, if you want something from him he’s gonna do it his way or twist it into something to tease you. so he’ll say something like “if you’re so desperate, ride my thigh” or maybe “ride my thigh and then we’ll see if you deserve my cock.” he’ll sit back and enjoy the show with a smug grin, one hand gripping your hip. he’s not controlling your pace, it’s mostly just there as an anchor bc you’re gonna be doing all the work. you’re lucky if you get to ride his bare thigh, but most of the time he’s got pants on so they always end up soaked after you cum and boba always teases you for it, “ruined another pair of pants, little one” but really he isn't even one to talk, he’ll be rock hard and leaking through his pants too. he’ll also nine times out of ten put his fingers or thumb into your mouth to suck on while he flexes and pushes the hard muscle of his thigh up to your cunt. he likes that satisfaction of knowing that even his thigh can make you shudder and whine his name--a bit of a power trip esp if he’s sitting on the throne. he’ll fuck you nice and hard afterwards if you’re a good little princess for him          

din: din wants you to ride the beskar thigh plating. he doesn't realize it’s a thing he finds arousing until you sit over his thigh and he sees the heat from your thighs fog up the metal while your arousal smears over the shiny beskar. literally it’s like something just CRACKS in him and he goes feral for it. a dark thrill that comes from seeing your cunt drip over his precious armor, something so sacrilegious that shouldn't be arousing but it’s the hottest thing he’s ever seen. sure, it’s a bit cold at first but the more you get into it the quicker it heats up--it’s slippery too, not a lot of friction unless you drag your clit over the seams of the armor, but with din’s hands holding onto your hips and dragging you over his thigh, it’s not long before you cum. din is gonna be encouraging you the whole time, just a constant flow of praise and little moans of his own. he might bury a hand in your hair or slip off his glove and touch your clit when your hips roll up into his hand. he’d loose his mind if you lended a hand and palmed him through his pants. he doesn't even care if he ruins his trousers, he’s just so...fixated on the hypnotic motions of your hips rolling over his thigh, your wetness dripping off the plating and onto the floor. he might focus on your mouth, parted with gasping moans or how they roll the syllable of his name. he likes to watch you come undone like this, shuddering and whiney as you cum and eventually roll off his thigh. he probably busts a nut right then and there if you start to roll your tongue over the beskar, happily cleaning up the mess you made. but....sometimes...lick it off himself just to get a taste of you       

paz: big boy blue ALSO likes when you ride his beskar, but he likes it better when the armor is off and he gets to feel your wetness for himself. he has big ol’ beefy thighs and likes when you straddle one and start to ride him like that. imo he likes it when youre pressed up right near his cock so when you roll forward your own thigh brushes against his cock. it’s also just easier for him to grab your hips, set a pace and watch you squirm and whine. ngl he’s more interested in fucking you, so he’ll get cheeky and start jerking his thigh or holding you in place while he circles his thumb over your clit. p much will sabotage your wild ride and convince you to slide onto his cock instead. though,....if you were to tie him up, tease him bye riding his thigh, he might like that :)  

rex: oH rexY BOY--listen, rex has heard ALL about thigh riding, or rather what the clones like to call it, “paint job”. he doesn't understand the big deal, thinks that it’d be a complete hassle to clean and what not. in my oPiNiOn he’ll be sitting with you in an empty break room or on a couch, you both have feelings for each other but nothing's been said yet. somehow the topic of paint jobs come up and he tells you what he thinks and how it “couldn't possibly feel good, blah blah blah”. you just roll your eyes and you ask if he’s even tried it. he definitely blushes and mumbles out a no and with a leap of faith you ask him if he wants you to ride his thigh. baby boy rex gets very shy and embarrassed about it but he’s not gonna say no. so you’ll flash him a little grin and peel off your pants and your over shirt, make rex relax against the back of the couch/chair and sit over his plastoid covered thigh. even though when you start to grind on his thigh you still have your underwear on, rex with pick a corner of the room to just stare at. it’s not because he doesn't like you, he’s just incredibly shy and afraid he’ll cum in his pants if he looks at you. you gotta cup his jaw and force him to look at you. when that happens his eye will immediately drop to between your legs and just moan at the sight. he gets it now. seeing your arousal that’s already leaking through the thin fabric and staining the blue and white plastoid--he has to grip the fucking sidearm to anchor himself. his armor is one of the only things that he owns and is proud of, so seeing you riding his thigh, moaning and whimpering his name he goes wild for that shit. unfortunately he does end up cumming in his pants but eh fuck it. it was worth it   

cody: he likes when you ride his thigh in semi public places like the 79′s, debrief room, gunships, you name it. imma explain the 79′s scenario bc im a whore but anyway, cody likes to bring you on dates there, one because the drinks are free for him, two it’s dark and so unless someone is really looking at the two of you, it’s pretty secluded. he always chooses a back corner table and after a couple drinks you start to get handsy--nuzzling his neck and wiggling your fingers between the gaps separating his thigh and codpiece. it alWAYS starts like that. cody will chuckle, push his nose into your neck and nibble a line up to your ear, then bite down onto the cartilage. in that dark, rumbly voice he might sigh “such a depraved little creature. we’re in public”. but you can feel his smile and how is pulse quickens under your fingertips. cody will sigh and shake his head as he pulls you onto his lap, bUT--he’s gonna have you with your back to his chest plate, your dress/skirt/pants rolled up or down just barely in the view of anyone who glances over or looks a little closer. it’d be no secret what you both were up to but cody likes that. dude doesn't have any shame and so he’ll wrap an arm over your hip, push you panties to the side and slide his fingers through your folds. once they're coated in your arousal he might pop them into his mouth or yours, clean them off then flex his thigh onto your pussy. when he asks you to grind on his thigh you readily agree. while you ride his thigh he’ll nibble at your throat and suck bruises onto your skin, either watching your wet pussy slide over the plastoid armor or on the look out in case one of his brothers comes near. one time, just as you started to cum, a couple fresh shiny’s got an entire eyeful of you arching and burying your nose into cody’s neck as he rolled his fingers over your clit. safe to say they were a bit spooked--but of course, cody thought it was the funniest thing and couldn't stop laughing even if you were close to tears with embarrassment. now....he doesn't invite anyone to watch, but he wouldn't say no to a few prying eyes          

wolffe: I feel like with wolffe, it’s gonna be right after a mission--one of you might've almost died or gotten real hurt so he’s not thinking about fucking you properly--he just want his mouth on yours, hands buried in your hair as he pins you against the wall. I dont think he initially meant for you to ride his thigh, but when he wedges it between your legs and you moan into his mouth the second he increases the pressure, he freezes. he’ll do it again and when it receives the same reaction from you he smirks and tugs on your hair and might say smthn like “you like that? if you wanted to ride my thigh you could've asked sooner”. he’s either focused on your face or on your pussy, just soaking up all your little reactions or twitches when you roll your cunt over the plastoid. he'll have both hands on your hips, helping you grin up on him, while you either cup his face or grip his arm. either way youre in for a wild fucking ride--wolffe tbh wants to see his armor dripping by the time he’s done with you. sO do nOT be surprised if he just, doesn't let you stop, pushes you to keep going until he’s satisfied. imo I think he’ll make you lick it up after, or just in general would really Like It if you run your tongue over any part of his armor. he likes to be Appreciated :)

wrecker (im sorry I just nEEDed to include him kejkejh): honestly since baby boy wrecker is uh, so big, thigh riding is some of the first things you try with him. you’ll both be butt ass naked bc it’s just easier to explore like this, and while wrecker is eager he knows he has to think about his strength in order not to overwhelm or hurt you unintentionally. he’s a bit of a goof ball so when you straddle his thigh and bring his thicC fingers to your cunt he’ll smile and say some shit like “wow, you’re wet” or like “is it always this wet/soft?” he doesn't mean for it to be teasing, it's more like he’s just stating a fact bc he’s curious about you. you just nod and say it’s all for you, baby/only for you. the second you put your cunt over his thigh he’ll curse and clamp his hands around your hips or ribcage, and just to make the experience all that better for him, you’ll jerk him off while you ride him. wrecker is very vocal/loud and so you’ll know exactly what you’re doing that he likes--he’ll probably tell you how pretty you look, or how good you smell etc., that bOY IS SO FULL OF LOVE and just wants to tell you! it doesn't take long for him to spill into your hand, he shakes and no doubt wakes up half the barrack/ship but who the fuck cares. you just smile and continue to ride his thigh, chasing your own thigh. once he recovers a bit, you can grab his fingers and show him how you like to be touched. he’s a surprisingly quick learner with this and so it doesn't take long for you to cum. afterwards he’ll run his fingers over his thigh, collect the mess you left and taste you and maybe say “you should ride my face. can we do that?”