#im so not normal about Ted

[average-hyperfixator]

I love Ted rambles sooooooo so much thank you for this I had to look away every five sentences because I was stimming to much/pos

I also love when people dive into Ted and Ellen's dynamic because it's one of the most fascinating ones

also that radio drama clip gets me EEEEEEEEEVERY TIME MAN

I love you Ted, Ted you are my favorite, you mean everything to me Ted

Thinking about IHNMAIMS in pretty much all of its forms.

Specifically Ted and Ellen. Obviously in the Game their relationship is very different from the short story/comic/radio drama, with Ted being in love with Ellen(although it’s evident it’s because she is the only woman left alive). In the game he shows devotion to her, he is willing to push past his usual methods of flirtation and find other ways to get what he needs.

But in the other adaptions his feelings towards Ellen are mixed. I think his unique backstory with being so dependent on women to live a happier and more lavish life style, significantly effect how he views Ellen beyond AM’s tampering

Throughout the short story Ted constantly thinks ill of Ellen. Even though prior to being placed in this hell, she had only had sex twice before. But she is the last woman alive on earth. The video game(while following a different plot line(still one that is extremely tragic and literally made me cry)) expresses that even before Ellen’s assualr she had little to no interest in sex. She would never have had sex with the four men if it weren’t for

1. AM

2. Being the Last women alive

3. AM’s deliberate tampering

In a world where characters like Benny have been so permanently physically marked as a form of torture by AM, something like sex, is not as extreme in comparison(at least from Ted’s perspective). However to be the last woman alive, with minimal interest in sex, to be tampered with in such a way, is such a horrific form of torture.

I’m going to shift a way from this for a second to talk about Ted’s backstory for the video game. I understand that the videogame makes changes in terms of backstory for some of the characters(like Benny), so we can’t claim Ted’s backstory for the game is even remotely close to whatever it might have been for the short story. However, I still think can provide interesting context to his behavior towards Ellen.

Starting off, he really isn’t the cool rich guy that he played himself off to be when life was still normal. He never came from money, he was poor and he was forced to work and couldn’t go to school. However he was good looking which is resulted in older woman being attracted to him. And when he was NINETEEN, one older woman gave him her husband’s money and offered him the chance to travel and live in luxury.

Now this probably isn’t important, or was even taken into consideration by the game makers, but I was curious as to what the possible age gap between this older woman and Ted could be. The were together for 5 years, then she died

She died specifically of an aneurysm, which according to Google typically happens between the ages of 30 to 60. There is all this stuff with the Cold War and ww3 and I was going to try to do all this math with it but it’s too late for that and not relevant to the point I’m trying to make. But I’m just going to do some simple mental math and estimate that it might have been late 60’s or early 70’s when the older woman and Ted first got into a relationship. As I’m assuming everything went to shit in 1995 since that’s when the game came out, and 25 years had passed after he met the woman. Also this makes sense as Ted’s grandfather sold the farm due to the Great Depression, since most people married and had kids young, I’m going to be generous and say grandpa was 30 in 1929, and Ted’s mother or father was 9, then 10-12 years later Ted was born. Then 19 years later it would be about the 60’s or 70’s.

I am going to presume that the older woman had been married to her husband for at least 15 years. So it might have been 50’s at the earliest possibility. And the average age people married at then was when they were in their 20’s. So when she met Ted she was AT THE EARLIEST 35. Making her at least 16 years older than Ted when the first got together. But also worth noting that they do specifically mention older. So if we look on the higher side of the typical ages for aneurisms she could have been 55 when they first met(as the 5 years would pass making her 60) so she could have been 36 years older than him.

This seriously isn’t relevant to the actual point I’m trying to make with Ellen and Ted but I got sucked in. I guess I just wanted to highlight that Ted did not have the power in this relationship, he was young and poor, while she was old and rich, and I can imagine how that kind of relationship would impact him.

The next thing I want to note is the use of the word ‘lover’.

Though it can be used in a strictly romantic non intimate sense, I think it is used in the sexual way here.

Especially with the provided context of two different definitions of the word ‘lover’ both highlighting it’s connotations with sexual relationships

Furthermore, Ted’s relationship with the older woman is essentially just a sugar baby relationship. She is letting him experience things he never could have without her money. She teaches him how to act as a socialite and gets him used to the high life.

In connection to the sexual elements above, there was a video I wanted to link here but I can’t find it anywhere anymore. It was a YouTube video with a bunch of sugar babies discussing their experiences. And one woman confides that you really won’t make much money if you are in a platonic or non intimate romantic relationship with your sugar parent. If you want to make money and live richly, you have to preform sexual favors.

Now it’s hard to say if this was the only relationship with an older woman that Ted had been in. But regardless of whether it was one woman or a billion, using his body in order to get something that he wants has become an important asset to Ted; As seen in the castle with the maid and the witch. His love for Ellen(in the video game) helps him break past this fatal flaw of his, despite AM’s obvious temptations to make him fail.

Even if this stuff was in anyone’s minds when they wrote Ted’s backstory but I think it’s extremely important to note, especially as we return to my main point.

As stated before, Ted views Ellen negatively due to her promiscuity, despite the desire(felt really gross typing this word in this context) being placed in her as a form of torture by AM. She also is a woman, and Ted’s life has been spent around using and being used by women, so definitely lots of conflicting stuff there. Additionally Ted’s experiences with sexual relations are shown to be based in being transactional.

When he agrees with Ellen to go to the caves to get the food, she rewards him by being intimate with him to show her gratitude. Ted sees it as her ‘using him.’ (From the Radio Drama, I was going to post the clip but I could only post one video in a tumblr post apparently)

In the comic, after this encounter he questions her motivations. What she got out of it, once again thinking transactionally. But her response

“Does there have to be a reason”

Really gets to me. Especially after looking at all this intertextual context. Thinking about video game Ted’s backstory with book Ted’s thoughts and behaviors, he is shown to always think there is some kind of catch. No one is doing something without getting something in return, especially if that thing is kindness.

Ted is so intensely paranoid(as seen in all versions). I think by pairing up the backstory for the game with the short story/comic/radio drama it’s evident to see how heavily affected he is by it.

He thinks he has been tormented less by AM, making him paranoid of the others, contributing towards his behavior towards Ellen. Yet despite everything from the past and all of AM’s tampering, he still finds comfort with Ellen. Her unfaltering kindness manages to reach him even when he dismisses it as a farce. She doesn’t hate him or the others for how they’ve treated her, she still wants to help them. He still cares for her and the others. But he is filled with so much fear. He even apologizes to her.

I feel like at that point in the Radio drama marks a shift. Ted has made a realization about AM and it’s a lot for him, but Ellen is there for him. It’s a genuinely sincere act of kindness from her where she doesn’t ask or expect anything in return. They have some kind of connection. Once again blending the different versions, I think that this moment between them comes together in the end when they kill the other victims together. They don’t speak to each other, they just do it quickly and he kills her. And here he doesn’t refer to her by any degrading names. In the comic he holds her. Like how in the radio drama she held him.

Overall I just wanted to point out how well all these versions really mix to provide so much more behind each character. The backstories for the video game allow the reader to understand book Ted’s actions and relationships from a new angle.

The is was super duper major mess of a ramble. It’s now 3 am and I have a migraine, so I’m done for tonight. I might clean this up another time or make another post about Video game Ted with context to his backstory since I didn’t include the events from the video game in here.

Once again these are just my thoughts and beliefs on how I think the video game backstory for Ted provides interesting context for Book Ted. I know that both stories play out differently and both Ted’s act differently so please don’t get angry if you disagree with the message of stuff I said

mini sequel post about video game Ted

[shepscapades]

Contrary to popular belief etho and bdubs are not divorced and in this essay I will

[yourlocalabomination]

Chibi Ted for the soul 😌

[itsdefinitely]

Hey!!! I love your art sm!!!!!

I was wondering: can you draw Ted being possessed by Tinky or Bill being possessed by Blinky (or both)?

Have a great day!!!!!!!

normal guys in normal scenarios

also

[r1ch1e-l1psh1tz]

Best cure for breakups is screaming starkid songs

Starkid grind never ends, even during the most agonizing times <3

More hcs!

Paul and Emma have a day out of the month where they get high and watch shitty movies

Pete will absolutely DEVOUR peanut butter

Richie got his hair stuck in a vacuum once

Hannah plays dolls with Webby

Ethan has tried (and failed) to hotwire a car

Ruth will print the most random ass pictures to other classrooms

Ted hates needles, so he physically has to look away when Pete checks his blood sugar

Boy Jerry’s family isn’t religious, so they have no clue how that happened

That’s it! As I said, starkid grind never ends!!!!

[pineappical]

father and son

[saltyb0ba]

the wrath of the waves must not be underestimated.

[lillybearrie]

i like to imagine that jason was just like- the normal one before his death, to the point that it kinda scared bruce and Alfred, like wdym your not bouncing off the walls (literally) 24/7? wdym you did your homework already? Wdym you don't need to be reminded to watch your language when we go to events? And were Dick would have been attempting to see what was sturdy enough for him to swing around on Jason was just... up in his room, reading sense and sensibility. And don't get me wrong he still a little rough around the edges sometimes like Bruce has to remind him to pull his punches a little more than he had to with Dick but overall he was a good kid who got good grades and did overall good work in the field while not as brilliant a detective as his successor nor as nimble as his predecessor Jason was a good Robin in his own right. And tho no one ever says it bruce was probably his happiest when jason was his robin.

[mrgaretcarter]

[unluckyprime]

nicks like . fine. he’s fucking it up in hell as a torso rn <3

[ironites]

royjamie is so insane to me bcs why are they like that. like i pity everyone who has to be around them because jesus christ i would want to run myself through a wall

[andi-o-geyser]

Continuing my Dr Jacob rants, I wanted to mention how... off I've been feeling with how the rest of the characters have been treating the whole situation regarding him dating Michelle. It's so far been exclusively framed as a marital issue that Ted has to work through, and it's being massively downplayed by the people around him and the narrative itself? I feel as if it's being equated to simply struggling with watching an ex move on, which is SO not what is happening here. This is a deeply unethical and damaging relationship to everybody else being pulled into Michelle and Dr. Jacob's absolute fucking nonsense, and I know I've brought this up before, but this is the type of shit you get your license taken away for. Having a relationship with a patient, former or not, is such a full stop unethical crossing of every boundary meant to exist between a patient and therapist that I couldn't explain just how much of a no it is if I had 15 hours uninterrupted and a megaphone.

At least where I live, the college of registered psychotherapy has a half a decade minimum legal time frame that must be elapsed to have a relationship with a patient, but honestly that's just technicalities. Therapists should, under NO CIRCUMSTANCE, have any kind of duel relationship with a current or former patient. Therapy is meant to make a connection to help you work through your problems, but it's not for making a friend and it's certainly not for meeting a partner. And for a therapist to abuse that power and, in this situation, maybe even coerce a patient out of their marriage so they can date them (because come on, that's exactly what fucking happened given the facts), is beyond deplorable. I don't give a fuck if Dr. Jacob gives nice guy energy, he's a professional (unprofessional as he may be) who knows exactly what he did, and he's a piece of shit for it.

I know this is TV, and the way therapists act in media is so sensationalized and dramatized, but considering Ted Lasso is "the show about having good mental health" and understanding and unpacking trauma and issues, the lacklustre reaction from characters regarding the relationship between Ted's ex wife and her (and Ted's!!) therapist are just bizzare. I need at least somebody in-universe to acknowledge how baffling the behaviour is, and I really can't deal with the idea of Ted being left out to dry in this situation. This isn't some simple "my ex is moving on and that's tough for me but I need to accept it" situation, this is a borderline traumatic betrayal of trust Ted is going through, and the thought of it being left unaddressed while Ted has to make nice with Dr. Jacob because "Well, I really need to not make a fuss because he makes Michelle happy and he's Henry's new father figure now!" is soooo fucking awful I honestly can't even think about it. Anyways don't date your therapist this has been my PSA

[trentcrimminallybeautiful]

i think about the whole "love that" exchange a lot.

[itsdefinitely]

hey don't cry. the jeri/rys will never be able to share simple human intimacy. they'll never get to hold hands. why are you crying louder

[r1ch1e-l1psh1tz]

As much as I hate getting sick, god does a deep voice give me gender euphoria <3

Anywaysssss, HCS!!!!!!

When Paul and Emma move in together, Paul tries to keep the fridge somewhat organized, while Emma doesn’t care and just throws stuff in there

Richie doesn’t like syrup (it got in his hair once)

Lex really wants to yell when she sees a bad mom at toy zone

Ted can eat spicy food, like, nothing phases him. Pete on the other hand can’t handle spicy food, but he really likes it so he’ll still eat it

Hannah doesn’t like eggs

Richie can’t handle a lot of blood (now think about the implications)

This is all I have for today!!

[standardlovers]

shauna + her children in season 2 episode 6

bigger than the whole sky - taylor swift / small bump - ed sheeran / lego house - ed sheeran / fourth of july - sufjan stevens / @petfurniture on twitter / the s2e6 transcripts