#im so fucking tired i should go to bed god
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the-kipsabian · 1 year ago
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i know me complaining wont matter but wow tk how could you do this to me. again. once again. we had such a good run this month why did you let me down like this
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Midnight pixel art
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innalheid · 2 months ago
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Feeling very Ascension by Gorillaz ft Vince Staples at 2:18
#i need to solve a puzzle or some shit. god. fuck.#i cant concentrate on anything i cant fall asleep i cant stay asleep i cant stay awake i cant wake up on time#i hate depression 😒 and all the other things wrong with me yknow#i need to do something like. good for me. but its so damn hard to drag myself into doing that too#brain. stop being so foggy. please.#im even like. im eating im drinking water. i could probably like do some sort of exercise but everything makes me so tired.....#like even a walk yknow? i do my shift at work and im at 3% battery. i dont. i dont know what to do man#and i dont even wanna die about it???? im actively NOT suicidal for once#like are you kidding me??? ive been suicidal for like over a decade and for once#my brain is still popping up like have you considered killing yourself? 🤔 but im Genuinely not swayed by it at all#which is weird. and probably good. but now i just feel like. numb#stuck. stagnant. foggy. can we PLEASE cut through this fog and have some meaningful brain functions for a little bit. brain. cmon#i dont wanna die but i *do* wanna sleep for like. three days#i want a week off where i have NOTHIN to do#genuinely nothing to do. chores are done work is on pause i need nothing creeping in at the edges thinkin bout#ohhhhh you should be doing this instead..........youre wasting your time........do a task.....#but i cant i cant do a task. i cant. and its so frustrating and i feel bad about it#id feel much worse about it if my BRAIN wasnt as foggy as fucking SAN FRANCISCO#and i keep trying like. healthy ways of ''feeling something'' like hobbies i like or yummy food#nothin. does fuckin nothin. i get off and it gives me a Little bit of clarity Maybe. like#no wonder bad coping mechanisms happen yknow??? its an absolute fucking miracle i havent taken up smoking#anyway. i need to go to bed. tomorrows gonna be a long day. if you feel so inclined send me mental love or something. im fuckin tired folks.
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dragons-and-yellow-roses · 2 months ago
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I was just listening to a song I used to love while we were friends. I listened to it so often, we talked so often, it became the background music to our relationship.
I'm listening to it while I knit. I often forget that I started knitting because of you. I remembered tonight. It's strange, I never knitted anything for you. I've knitted for other loved ones, rarely for myself, but never for you. I remembered you showing me the amazing things you made, and I wished I could get to that level of skill. But at that time, you had to explain to me how to purl because I couldn't get it.
Everything reminds me of you in a terrible way. Everything I do is an echo of you. I started painting so that I could paint for you. I started knitting to bond with you. I hear your voice in the music I listen to. You're haunting the things that I love. Will I ever make a brush stroke or stitch without you on my mind?
#i should be able to block all music i listened to on Spotify from 2018-2020. i was not doing well and i dont need the reminders pls#im fine this was just kinda reflective#so much of what i do was inspired by her. i havent spoken to her in three years. we havent been friends for five#but my first painting was a gift to her. i started knitting because she knitted. i got so much music from her#we bonded heavily over music. and i used it to cope after she left. so unfortunately shes mixed into so much of it#she got me into dnd which got me into a different ttrpg im playing now (unknown armies)#shes a big reason i applied to the summer camp i worked at for six years#and a big reason i took the position i had the last two years. and the reason i told our camp legend (long story)#she was in my christmas in july gift i gave and received this year#i dont think ill ever be able to forget her. on good nights thats a good thing. its reassuring. she'll always be with me#but on bad nights. i feel like im never going to stop missing her#i was knitting tonight while listening to music. as the post suggests. and i was just overcome with her#this is the bed i was in when she called and left me. this is the bedroom we used to video call to practice sign language in#oh theres another one. i was going to be an asl interpreter. years ago in another life. i always practiced with her#we're both autistic and asl is easier than speaking a lot of the time#fuck. it reminds me of the ship of theseus. its 2:30am so i wont be able to explain well but#no actually i tried and i cannot explain. youll just have to understand. some days i wish i ciuld replace all the parts that were her#and sometimes im so afraid to lose the parts that were her because thatll feel like losing her#if i ever consciously decided to stop knitting (which i may have to do soon) it will feel like im replacing a board that was hers#how many of my boards are hers? are any of hers mine anymore? how many of hers can i lose before shes gone?#that last one was asked with fear and hope. and fear. depending on the day#god im tired. goodnight
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trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.
vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍
#sorry bros im about to ventpost in these mf tags 👍#im so fucking tired man. im already suicidal to begin with but the Everything happening is making it Worse. Yippe Yahoo Hooray.#therapy in a week though so ive got that at least.#this is the worst time of year for shit to go south.but Uh Oh saying that makes me feel like a selfish fuckass because other people -#- have it worse. like. god fucking damn. i get Extra suicidal around september -> march range sure. but other people are literally suffering#like as we fucking speak. and ive done fuckall to help cause i dont know HOW to help. but thats not a fucking excuse#im just being comfortable in my lazy ass depression spiral cause im a selfish fucking prick. “i cant spare the energy to vett things”#other people are fucking dying and im over here like “noo im too tiwed :( i cant do anyfing so im not gona do anyfing cuz im wazy and tiwed”#what the fuck is wrong with me lmao. knowing me im not gona change shit anyway despite fucking complaining about it cause im just. fucking#Like That.#idk. i was reblogging some of those “hold in there dont kill yourselves” posts cause like. yk. suicide bad or fucking whatever. but someone#on this site said something along the lines of “ok but how many people reblogging/posting these told jews to kill themselves” and like.#i dont know. i dont fucking know dude. so i guess im not reblogging Those anymore.#theres bigger issues out there and here i am focusing on some queer people who might kill themselves. idk. i should just join them yk#cause i never fucking focus on the bigger shit cause “i dont know how” and “i dont want to make things worse so i just wont do anything” so#im not doing fuckall other than just being part of the fucking problem here.#i should probably just delete social media for a while and see from there.#or just fucking drink about it thats the other option. its worked for me before (lie) so i may as well do it again am i right#im sorry i never like. boost gofundmes or fundraisers and shit i just.#i dont have a fucking excuse. im just a lazy fucking bastard in my own stupid fucking comfort circle.#“oh no seeing that people are dying makes me uncomforyable :(” ok well people are fucking dying you self absorbed douchebag. why cant you#get off your stupid fucking ass and do something. get a job so you can fucking help people or *something#its not like you have to pay rent and shit.#<- all about myself. cause yk. self centered douchbag. hooray.#i dont pay rent and i dont have to pay for my own food. i still live with my parents. im fucking useless to society so i may as well get a#job and send the money i dont fucking need to somrone who DOES need it. but here i am.#in.my stupid fucking bed til noon cause “the world is scary and jobs are hard :(”#its fucking retail. retail isnt as fucking hard as like. construction and shit but here i am anyway “unable” to do shit.#i fucking could if i just fucking ballsed up and put up with shit. but no. here i fucking am going “nooo i should just kill myself instead”#vent post
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skenpiel · 1 year ago
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homestuck fans when theres no rhyme or reason to the trickster designs and its literally just a jumbled mess of hideous colors and vague candy themes which means theres no consistency to analyze to help with making fan designs
#now imagine if you will a very distraught face. because i cant be bothered adding an image#ANYWAYSSSSSSS i wanted 2 try making one but god its just so hard bc theres so many fucking colors and i suck at coloring anyway#i tried analyzing them to the best of my abilities to see if there was any consistency i could go off of......... but no theres Nothing#the only thing is that their cheek swirls are the same color as their pestechum colors. and thats it#even the outfits are different it seems to be slightly altered versions of their original outfits?#like roxy was wearing her purple knit dress when she got bonked but it was still her original outfit afterwards#their hair colors dont make sense their shoe colors dont make sense their head ornaments make a LITTLE sense..........#jakes and dirks are the most obvious. pumpkin and orange soda its like their thing i guess#janes being a muffin makes sense cuz crockercorp baker etc etc#roxys makes the least sense...... i dont think there was ever any mention of cotton candy for her aside from when caliborn wanted his weird#smut to be color coordinated for whatever reason#whenever i make otufits its usually just varying shades of the same 3 or so colors so trickster designs are a nightmare#even my old trickster mode trollsona was like. 3 colors total LOL#not to mention i wanted to make this design for my trollsona. and we only ever saw humans in trickster mode#and looking at older fanart didnt help cuz everyone had decided unanimously that the canon designs sucked ass (they did)#and in the future we should all give each character a food or somthing similar to base the whole design off of (good decision)#blehh. i give up its too much of a pain-_-#anyway. maybe i really am sick i think i need to lay down#already slept literally all day but im still so tired..........#i took painkillers and allergy meds in case of cat hair on bed but i still feel groggy as fuck#well whatever. itll probably go away soon i never really stay sick for long
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mieczyhale · 11 months ago
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one of the guys that runs a reaction channel i've been watching for ages just announced that they're ending the channel next year bc he got a job offer and he's getting married and he's thinking about his family and his future and like...
my son in christ you are 21
i literally want to fucking die
#dont get me wrong! good for him! i'm happy for him#but he really said he started the channel when he was younger (turns out that was 18) and it felt like time to move on#i am 31 and only got the job i love a year and a half ago#i have been dating and living with the same person for... 10 years in 11 days and all i've ever wanted is to get married#(and be a mom but i dont think im ever getting that one but im gonna go ahead and focus on that one zero percent or i'll cry)#i say. like all of this doesnt make me want to cry lmao#i am so incredibly blessed to have what i have. like truly i ended up with the perfect sort of life for my awkward mentally ill ass#but i cannot NOT spiral just a little when people younger than me have the things i want so so bad and then also talk as if their young age#is older than it is. i know you feel mature and older but you are still so fucking young. and okay honestly - now that im rambling - thats#just part of it huh?? i mean a lot of the spiral is actually Wow. I really lost so much of my life (so much time. so many opportunities) to#mental illness and other shit i couldn't control and there are people who didn't fucking have that. there are people who didn't have to#deal with any of that!!! honestly!!! and you just.. dont do anything to prepare for the future when you do not expect there to be one for#so long and then you can't stop fucking everything up and then oh look! you're in your 30s and-#god i cannot fucking do this#it is 1:35 in the morning and im tired but now i feel really stubborn about going to bed. i should. i want to. but also i dont.#actually going to bed is where The Horrors are so#this really was the dumbest fucking shit i think im gonna go to bed & play p.m on my phone and try to be a little less pathetic#maison speaks
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skyllion-uwu · 2 years ago
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Brains are so stupid one second it'll be like "You should NEVER talk to anyone ever again ghost them forever" and the next it's like "You need to surgically attach yourself to everyone because you are so alone and need human connection" before switching back to "Erm you're a weirdo go back to never talking to anyone because you're going to chase them away with the rate you're going lol" WHY CAN'T I WIN?! (not about anyone/anything in particular, this is just a pattern I've noticed for the past 5 years or so. Plus my school schedule is hellacious at the moment which is making it worse)
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drop--pop--candy · 3 months ago
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trying my hardest to cut back on vent posts but holy fuck the Horrors
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wouldwulfie · 4 months ago
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im thinking TOO FUCKING MUCHH someone needs to. kill me dead. right now Right fucking now Get me out of here
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nomaishuttle · 1 year ago
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I'm gonna be so open and honest with you guys right now i fucking rly dont want to go to work tomorrow .
#im violently nauseous rn and ik its judt bc ive been in a straining position and also i ate like 20 slimjins but like km only gonna get 5#hours of sleep maximum im gonna have a headache im so tired of everything i wanna have a day off but i cant. Its only tuesday and im#already liek Please can we be done please no more this week all done all done#im so fucking sick of working i dont want to have to work for the next 40 years Minimum. i hate everythingbon earth#i dont understand how ppl work fulltime and have a life i only get 2 live At all on weekends#and even then its only 1 day saturday bc sunday is my Doing all my chores and stuff day#so i do all my laundry i tidy up the room Et cetera. i dont udnerstand how people can just do this forever#it genuinely feels like. bc i leave 4 work at 6am. i get home around 5pm. im supposed to go to bed. well technically i should go 2 bed at#9 to get a full 9 hours but look man . that would give me 4 hours a day to be a person#so my bedtime is officially 10 but usually i go to bed at 12 which means i dont get enough sleep which means as soon as i getnoff work the#next day im even less willing to do anything#+ doing anything fun fucking costs money if not the thing itself the travel expenses. and if i spend money i just have to work to make that#money back i fucking hate it. and im doing this for what. so that in 40 years i can retire and then 10 years after that oh no unforeseen#expenses or something suddenly my retirement isnt cutting it i have to go work at fucking walmart or something as a 70 year old judt to#make ends meet. god. And when the fuck am i supposed to have kids i want kids very badly one day but how the fuck am i supposed to have#kids if id only be able to spend Maximum 6 hours a day with them. thats if my work is like Doectly next door.#how. how. how. less than 6 hours even bc theyd go to bed before i did so rly like 3 hours a day with my theoretical kids Im an awful#theoretical parent and maybe my theoretical spouse works less hours so they can be home with the kids but they resent me for always being#at fucking work 9 hours a fucking day and they resent me for not being there for our theoretical kids Im sorry theoretical partner i want#to fucking be there but SOMEBODY has to put money into our theoretical savings account. UGH!!!#i hate work i hate it i hate it#i dont even hate my job i just hate that its my entire fucking life#i hate that i essentially get half a day every week thats truly mine that i get to do whatever i want. and in my current situation i barely#even fucking get that idk.
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iichfilwypj · 15 days ago
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his dreamy girl | percy jackson
ღ percy jackson x daughter of hypnos! reader ღ warnings: i mention a hit? this is pure fluff to me im very bad at this. Also i was falling asleep and i thought of these so it might suck <3 ღ wc: 685 pt 2 - pt 3 - pt 4 - pt 5 - pt 6 - pt 7
“And then he tried to steal my sword! The one that literally comes back to me! How stupid can you be?” his rambles echoed through Cabin 3 that hot, dark night. Some hours earlier, the blue team had won Capture the Flag, and Percy was especially excited to share all the details with her. 
Like every other time, she hadn’t attended; not because she wasn’t skilled with weapons, but because no one had managed to wake her from her nap. When Grover tried, he received a slap and a mumbled, “The horses are hungry”, in response.
So there she was, lying on Percy’s bed in her pajamas with a face mask on, listening to him recount how he had hit Clarisse on the nose, how he had nearly eaten dirt, and how Annabeth had, once again, shoved him into the lake. His voice was extremely high-pitched, and she was on the verge of bursting into tears.
That was something she hated about being a daughter of Hypnos. Although her father had blessed her with the divine power to control her dreams –and believe me, being a demigod, that was very, very nice–, he also gifted her with a constant sense of fatigue. At breakfast? She was tired. Lunch? She was tired. Oh, she just woke up from a five-hour nap? So what, she was still tired. She couldn’t help it, no matter how hard she tried. 
When she met Percy, she quickly became friends with the boy who, instead of ignoring her for hours until she apologized for something she couldn’t control, set up a cozy little corner for her in his cabin, with pillows, stuffed animals, candles, and even tea bags. Come on, that boy was willing to challenge his dyslexia just to read something for her before bed.
“And then Annabeth goes, Well, you should run faster. Like, what!? I run very fast, sorry–” Percy’s shout jolted his friend out of her daydream, having closed her eyes as thoughts raced through her mind. She looked at him, watching as he fiddled with the sheets, and decided she couldn’t take it anymore.
“Hey, ocean breath” she murmured, and to him, her voice sounded like a fucking angel’s. Seeing her there, in his bed made him feel like an idiot and a coward. 
He looked at her with curiosity, quickly recalling what he was about to share and feeling excited to tell about it. “What? I was about to tell you how she crashed into the tree,” but as her eyes slowly rolled back, Percy realized what was happening. He couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his lips. “Oh, Zeus, don’t tell me you’re tired!”
He moved closer to her, resting his head on his pillow and basically lying down on top of her. By the way her head was tilting to the side, he knew he only had a few minutes left before she fell completely asleep. 
And yes, he totally chose those last minutes to tease her.
“Oh god, you’re like a baby! No, like a puppy. Wait, was it cats that slept like sixteen hours a day?” the girl tried to push him away with the little strength she had left, but Percy knew that deep down, she enjoyed this. Well, maybe not being squished by him, but knowing that he didn’t see her sleep as a bad thing.
She would never know, but Percy's favorite pastime was admiring her while she slept –oh my god, of course he couldn’t tell her that, it sounded really creepy. He cherished every detail about her, and if she was happy sleeping, he would make the whole world fall into an eternal slumber just to please her.
“Go to sleep, dreamy,” he said, gently flipping them both so she was on top of him. After turning off the little lamp beside the bed, his hands found their way to her back, stroking it softly. She buried her face in his neck and sighed. He dared to say “I love you”
But she was already lost in her dreams, and he was completely head over heels.
again, i am slut for fluff!!!! <3
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kittyhazelnut · 2 years ago
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I am LOSING my MINDDDD
#so i tried to go to bed at 8:30 but my cat was in my bed and i didn't want to bother him so i went back downstairs#i tried to sleep on the couch downstairs at 10ish and the air was really cold and dry bc of how that room is positioned and I couldn't#so now im back in my room (my cat's under the bed so we're good in that sense)#AND MY CHEST IS DOING THAT STUPID GROWLING THING AGAIN UGHHHHH#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP WHEN MY CHEST IS VIBRATING AND GROWLING AT ME#not to mention that my fever went away for like three hours today and then came back and I'm pretty sure I've got a fever rn#even though I've been taking advil or Tylenol every two hours so it SHOULD GO THE FUCK AWAY#and now my face feels like it's going to light my pillow on fire#which is the very reason i finally gave up trying to sleep after 6ish hours of lying in bed last night#god fucking dammit#and ofc I still have my flu symptoms like my super sore throat that makes it painful to talk or swallow and my super congested sinuses#i not going to survive this stupud flu i stg#covid was so easy it was just a sinus nightmare and i had a killer headache but at least i got to sleep 16 hours a day#I've probably alept six hours in the last two and a half days#and this is the first time ive felt even kinda vaguely tired (despite taking melatonin every night)#at what point do i literally turn the shower on super hot and sleep on the bathroom floor i stg#i can just put a sign on top of me so if my parents find me they don't think i just passed out or something#/j#but like. is it really.#because i did take a shower last night and then i did take another at 6 am just for the hot steam and it really did help#hghhhhh#if im back on tumblr in the next hour I've failed
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wileys-russo · 7 months ago
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I had a cute idea I wanted to share because I love the way you write!! Leah has back to back interviews from home and reader is sat on the sofa just watching her, falling more and more in love with how passionate her girl is. Leah gets all blushy and a bit flustered by the gaze. Just a cute fluffy one x
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lock down II l.williamson
"-and then i've got another over zoom with sky sports at three and i should be done for the day." your girlfriend sighed, already tired by her day before it had even begun.
"no rest for the wicked huh?" you hummed, still laid down in bed as the blonde restlessly paced back and forth across the room. "god then i've gotta fit in our gym program too! do you mind if we do it tonight? i know we're not supposed to but that at least gives me a few hours in between." leah groaned in realization.
"leah breath! of course i don't mind babe, its more enjoyable when we do the program together anyway. i'm more than sure we can push it back a few hours and it shouldn't affect the stats too much." you assured her gently as the blonde nodded.
"so much for lock down! everyone's watching bloody netflix and making tiktoks but noo im memorizing scripts and listening to the same witty one liner over and over about how hard it must be to 'work from home' as a footballer." leah mocked, falling backwards onto the bed with a huff.
"but is it?" you questioned as she sat up slightly and turned her head to be able to see you. "is it what?" leah asked with a confused frown. "is it hard to work from home as a footballer?" you questioned with a frown of your own.
one which quickly turned into a grin as your girlfriend lunged at you, ducking your head under the covers as her bony fingers poked and prodded at you, your safety blanket ripped away as the blonde hovered over you.
"you think you're so fucking funny." leah rolled her eyes as your grin grew. "well one of us has to have a sense of humor in this relationship baby, you're not called captain grumpy for nothing." you teased, tapping your lips expectantly.
"cheeky girl." leah tutted but none the less gave into your request, pressing her lips to yours as your hands moved to tangle in her hair, deepening the kiss as she settled on top of you.
but no sooner did the taller girl slip her tongue into your mouth, hands gliding slowly up your bare stomach, did her alarm go off.
"why!" leah pulled away and groaned moodily, flopping down and burying her face in your neck making you chuckle and gently scratch your nails against her scalp as you tapped snooze.
"babe this isn't making me anymore inclined to get up." your girlfriend mumbled against your skin making you smile. "what if i promise to make breakfast and have it ready for when your first interviews done?" you whispered into her hair, squirming as the girl sighed.
"might be working a little." leah admitted making you laugh and press a kiss to her cheek. "mm and what if i make your favorite breakfast?" you hummed, still rhythmically scratching at her scalp.
"the williamson special?" she questioned, the words muffled into your neck but you laughed again. "the williamson special. an omelette with ham, cheese and not a single spec of colour, flavour or vegetables." you teased, squealing as she pinched your hip but pulled her head up.
"you promised not to mock my eating habits." the older girl frowned with a pout that you quickly kissed away. "no i promised not to mock them last week, todays monday. brand new day of opportunity!" you grinned, pushing her hands away where they tickled at the sliver of skin where your shirt had rode up.
"first my speech impediment and now my diet. you really are a wicked awful woman!" leah sighed with a shake of her head as you scoffed.
"my love we've been over this. you don't have a speech impediment, you're just from milton keynes." you whispered against her lips, pulling away right before they could press against hers, pushing her off of you and moving to stand with a stretch.
"now my beloved MK, you're going the right way for the silent treatment missy." leah pointed at you with a glare as you oohed sarcastically. "tempting. is that a promise?" you winked, laughing as she lurched forward and grabbed the back of your top tugging you back down into bed.
"you are very lucky you're cute." your girlfriend tutted from above you, shaking her head. "and you're very lucky i'm so patient." you poked at her nose with an amused smile as leah gasped in mock offence, your girlfriend nothing if not the expert at annoying you.
"you wait for the third one and you won't have time to shower lee." you warned, pushing her fringe out of her face with a soft smile as she leaned over you to tap stop on the second alarm on her phone and looked down at you with a cheeky grin.
"in that case, wanna save some water?"
~
you were trying to concentrate on your own laptop, you really were.
in the spirit of having nothing better to do locked away in your home you'd signed up for an online accounting course, with leah already studying a much higher qualification in the same field she'd been a massive help.
but why would you waste your time looking at tax brackets and finance breakdowns when you could stare at your incredibly fit gorgeous girlfriend who was sat only a few metres away in your direct eyeline.
you smiled at how she threw and flailed her hands about as she spoke, always one to speak expressively and passionately as she was recounting a story from her childhood when she'd played on a boys team and was relentlessly pushed about for being 'just too good'.
it was one of the first things that had you falling deeply for the older girl, how passionate she was. not just about football but with anything she put her mind and heart to, including how fiercely she loved.
not just how she loved you, but how she loved her family, loved football, loved her friends, the girl could be a handful and a stubborn headache at times but nobody could deny that she was also one of the most sincere and loving human beings you'd ever met.
so with that in mind you sighed quietly, a dopey smile on your face as you pined over her like a lovesick puppy, something the pair of you were often teased about by your team mates but it just washed over you like water off a ducks back, both of you far too loved up in your little bubble to pay it any mind.
in fact without leah you were certain you'd have long lost your mind amid this pandemic, the blonde finding little ways every day to make you still feel so special or to have you smile or laugh, two things which rapidly became her favorite reward.
just yesterday she'd woken you up with breakfast in bed and a bunch of flowers just because.
granted she did order the breakfast from a local cafe which was still operating for delivery and you couldn't prove it but you were near certain that she'd stolen the flowers from some of your neighbors front yards on her morning walk.
regardless you were touched by the thoughtful gesture and showered her with sweet kisses as a thank you, even if leah did eat nearly all of your breakfast much to your amusement given it was hardly up to her usual bland unseasoned standards.
you leaned back a little more into the sofa and crossed your legs underneath you, balancing your laptop on a cushion on your lap, a soft smile plastered permanently into your features.
once or twice leah caught your eyes staring over the top of her own laptop, sending you a small grin or a subtle wink before her attention returned back to the interviewer.
you heard him say that the next game would be a drawing one, sliding your laptop away and hurrying to grab a notebook and pen, placing them beside leah who mouthed her thanks as you took a seat across from her at the dining table.
leah gave you a questioning look as you did so but you merely shrugged, gesturing for her to pay attention as she tuned back into the interview. you watched as she was told to draw her wembley stadium, competing against the interviewer.
you smiled as you took her in, the way her eyebrows furrowed in concentration, nostrils flaring in annoyance every now and then as she was unhappy with a stroke of her pen, a small puff of air exhaled from the corner of her mouth as the tip of her tongue pushed out the other side.
you took a photo of her and smiled, placing your phone back down and resting your chin on your hand. leah could feel your stare on her and as she revealed her drawing and you grinned as the tips of her ears and cheeks flushed red.
"stop!" she mouthed at you as you shook your head, still staring at her in admiration as her attention switched back to the interview. finally after what felt like hours of your gaze pinned to her leah was able to wrap it up, saying her goodbyes and clicking end call on the zoom, pushing her laptop closed.
"what?" you smiled innocently as the blonde sat back in her chair and shook her head at you. "you have a staring problem!" she accused with a point as you gasped and held a hand to your chest.
"i do not. i wasn't staring, i was admiring!" you clarified as leah hummed, her chair pushing back with a scrape. "cheeky." leah clicked her tongue as you followed after her to the kitchen, kissing her still slightly pink cheek with a smile as she grabbed a juice out from the fridge.
"leah!" you scoffed as you held your hand out for it to take a mouthful and she slapped her palm against yours with a wink.
last one, sorry babe." the blonde smirked as your mouth formed a small o. "those are mine!" you protested, rushing around the counter and trying to snatch it off her as she pushed you away effortlessly with one hand and downed the juice with the other.
"you are so unbel-" you started to tell her off as she exhaled happily and tossed the empty bottle into the recyling bin with a happy whoop as it landed. "no no wait, let me guess." her finger smushed against your lips silencing you as she stroked her chin as if deep in thought.
"unbelievably sexy?" silence. "no? okay. unbelievably charming?" silence again. "wrong again? mmm unbelievably intelligent?" more silence. "wow thought i had it there. unbelievably-" you wrenched her hand away at that and shook your head.
"unbelievably infuriating!" you rolled your eyes as leah smacked her forehead with a scoff. "that was my next guess!" she tutted with a shake of her head as you sighed, a small smile tugging at the corner of your mouth.
"hey hey don't get all stroppy. there's still three more in there i was only teasing." leah grabbed your waist and pulled your shorter form into her, a noise of surprise leaving your mouth as her hands hooked under your thighs and she hoisted you up to sit on the counter as she settled between your legs.
"how about the williamson special right now?" leah smiled, thumb tracing your bottom lip as you gave her a look of slight confusion. "you want another omelette?" you questioned as your girlfriend shook her head.
"no no baby girl, the real williamson special." leah rasped, hands toying with the waistband of your sweats as you caught onto what she was suggesting.
"mmm and whats that? my memory needs a jog." you hummed, a smile settling onto your own face as the girl leaned in, minty breath fanning your face as her lips were millimeters from yours.
"mind blowingly passionate sex with a guaranteed happy ending, and then-" your eyes fluttered closed as she moved to kiss at your neck, lips trailing from your jaw down to the column of your throat, biting softly before she moved to tug at the lobe of your ear.
"-then we eat potato smileys in bed naked and watch the golf." leah exhaled as you moaned playfully.
"god i love it when you talk dirty to me."
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ii-zi · 2 years ago
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uknow it's bad when u even start slurring in ur brain
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mayasikeu · 3 months ago
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brothers best friend
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got this idea from this twitter post
You were Jake’s sister so you were always used to seeing Heeseung around the house as he was Jake’s closest friend.
Since they had been friends for a while, you had known Heeseung ever since you were young. Your relationship with him was nothing special. He would tease you and play fight with you when Jake wasn’t there to entertain himself, you could ask him for advice and he would never judge you. There never was a sexual chemistry between you both until you became an adult. You and Heeseung would sometimes exchange sultry glances at each other around the house, you could’ve sworn you caught him starting at your cleavage once but you just brushed it off. He had definitely changed from the scrawny and socially awkward boy he was when he first met Jake.
Whenever he would come over to your house, you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from checking him out. His side profile looked like it was sculpted by angels, his fluffy auburn hair would frame his face perfectly extenuating his defined facial features, and of course you absolutely loved his soft succulent lips that looked so kissable.
If he weren’t Jake’s best friend you would definitely have shooted your shot already; you were afraid that he only saw you as a little sister. However, that was completely far from the truth.
One day Heeseung came over as usual, but this time he had decided to stay the night so he could play video games with Jake.
You had just come home after hanging out with your friends when you went down to the kitchen hoping to see Heeseung but was only met with a confused Jake.
“Ew, why are you dressed like a stripper?” he said, making a disgusted face. “Shut the fuck up Jake” you said rolling your eyes.
“No but seriously, why are you dressed like that? I’m just used to seeing you dressed like a hobo” he laughed before taking a sip of his drink.
“It’s none of your business” you scoffed before going up to your room and slamming your door shut in embarrassment.
Later on that night, you had decided to get something to drink before starting your nighttime routine and going to bed. To your luck, Heeseung was there in the kitchen alone.
“Oh hey Y/n” Heeseung smiled at you warmly. “Hey” you sighed.
“What’s wrong?” he asked when he noticed your upset facial expression. “Nothing, just tired” you said with a weak smile.
“Ah” he said before nodding. “What are you doing here though? I thought you and Jake were asleep” you asked.
“Jake is asleep but I was hungry”
“Oh, okay.”
“Is that how you’re going to sleep?” heeseung began, his voice soaking up the awkward silence. “Oh no, I was just about to change but I wanted to get a drink first” you laughed nervously.
“I’ve never seen you dress like this Y/n. Don’t tell Jake I said this but, damn you look good” he said while looking you up and down.
“Really? I only dress like this when I go out so that’s probably why.” you giggled. Heeseung nodded in response before the realisation hit him. “Wait, so you're telling me you went out… like this?” he said in disbelief.
“Yeah..”
“You should wear more layers next time. I don’t want random guys hitting on you” he leaned forward to whisper in your ear, his voice husky with desire.
“W-what? What do you mean by that, Heeseung?” you stammered over your words anxiously. The sudden change in his tone sent a rush of heat throughout your body. “You know what I mean. Can’t let other guys see you looking this good” he licked his lips.
“Oh my god, stop it” you pushed him away lightly. “Im being serious though, I mean unless you have a boyfriend or some-“
“No. No. I don’t have a boyfriend. I’m definitely single.” you chuckled, not letting him finish his sentence.
“Oh yeah?” Heeseung said, his tone dropping slowly, sounding more seductive. “Yeah..” you said quietly, your voice barely above a whisper.
The silence between you two became heavy with the unspoken desires and fantasies you have had about each other.
“And why’s that?” Heeseung said as he pinned you against the counter, looking you in the eyes. Your cheeks flushed a deep red under the intensity of his gaze.
“I don’t know” you coughed out almost choking on your own spit. “I think I know why,” he smirked.
“I know you want me Y/n, I see the way you look at me whenever I’m here.” Heeseung teased as he began playing with your hair. You could feel yourself hopelessly being drawn in by his seductive aura.
“You wanna get fucked by your brothers best friend that badly? And that’s why you wore these slutty shorts that barely cover your ass cheeks. You wore them for me, didn’t you?” he hummed. You nodded hesitantly, not being able to hold eye contact with his dark eyes that were fired with anticipation.
“Use your words” Heeseung murmured, his face inches away from yours and his tantalising breath grazing across your skin.
“Y-yes”.
Heeseung lifted your chin with his finger to make you look him in the eyes. “I’ve been wanting to fuck you for so long” Heeseung admitted, his voice trembling with raw emotion before leaning in for a kiss.
Your lips met in a searing kiss as Heeseung groped your ass roughly. “Gonna fuck this tight little pussy so hard ma. But we gotta be quick in case someone wakes up. Ok?”. “Mhm” you mumbled in the kiss not caring about anyone or anything else at that point. Heeseung lifted you up on the counter and took your top off, enjoying the view of your bare chest.
Impatiently, Heeseung pulled your underwear down before pumping his fingers inside of you with no warning.
“Heeseung” you whimpered. “You’re already so wet for me” he praised while covering your neck in love bites.
You threw your head back as you gripped onto his arm, forcing his fingers deeper into your needy cunt. Heeseung’s erection was growing bigger with each pathetic moan and whimper that was escaping from your mouth. “You’re such a needy slut” he groaned. “Fuck me, please” you whined.
“Don’t worry baby, I will.” he whispered before pulling his sweatpants down and releasing his hard cock. Slowly, he began stroking it as he rubbed your wetness all over his fingers.
Gently, he picked you off the counter before turning you around and bending you over. “Mmmm” he moaned in satisfaction as he rubbed his cock in between your cheeks. “They’re so soft” he mumbled quietly. You bit your lips, finding it increasingly hard to not moan loudly with each passing second.
He turned you over, making you face sideways before slowly sinking his cock into your walls, the sensation drawing a gasp from both of your mouth’s. “Fuck Y/n. You’re so tight” Heeseung moaned.
With a gentle movement, Heeseung began to move. Finding a rhythm that spoke of both passion and tenderness. Each motion, each touch, brought you closer together, the bond between you two deepening. The room was filled with the sounds of your muffled lovemaking, a harmony of low gasps and moans that showed the pleasure you were giving and receiving from him.
Heeseung snapped his hips in and out of you as slow as possible, trying to avoid making noise. “H-heeseung…feels s-s-so good” you whimpered inaudibly. “Shhh baby I know, but we have to be quiet” he curred while he covered your mouth with his hand, silencing your whimpers.
As you got closer, you could feel the tension building inside you, like a coil ready to spring. You could tell Heeseung was close too, his breaths coming in short, ragged gasps. With one final thrust, you both found your release together, your silent cries of pleasure joined in the air.
You collapsed into Heeseung’s arms, bodies still intertwined, as your breaths slowly returned to normal. You could feel his heart beating against yours, a steady reminder of the connection that had just formed between you two. You looked up at him, your eyes filled with love and contentment. "Heeseung," you whispered breathlessly, "that was perfect."
He smiled, his eyes shining with happiness. "It was more than perfect, Y/n," he replied, his voice filled with awe. "It was everything."
“Why don’t you sleep in my room tonight?” you asked, your eyes sparkling with a playful glint. “Are you crazy? Jake would fucking kill me if he caught me in your bed” he said before pulling his pants up.
“Please, I won’t be able to sleep without you tonight” you begged him. “Okay fine, but I’ll have to wake up before Jake does” he surrendered, not being able to resist your charm.
“Don’t worry, Jake isn’t a morning person anyways” you joked as you led him up to your bedroom sneakily.
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i’m sorry i haven’t posted anything this entire week i’ve been very sick and i still am but i hit 100+ followers so i really wanted to thank you guys i apologise that this is not the best i’ll try to write something better for my next post <//3
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