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#im so excited for this so feel free to reach out to me with any questions or to talk shop about your ideas!!
figofswords · 6 months
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the post grad why did i get an art degree what am i even doing what do i want in life where am i going crisis has finally hit i want to. lie down in the dirt. or something
#WHAT AM I DOING!!!!#i get up i go to my stupid retail job i stick labels on bags they pay me fucking thirteen bucks an hour i come home i lie on the couch#too tired to draw in too much pain to go anywhere no energy to reach out to college friends to do anything fun#no idea where the even start with getting an industry job no clue what i even WANT at this point#trying to remember what i loved so much about comics i want it BACK i HATE this#WHAT IS THE POINT!!!! WHAT DO I WANT WHERE AM I GOING!!! WHAT COMES NEXT!!!!!!#there's no clear career trajectory i can't do freelance i need structure i can't work too much i need free time#my brain doesn't work every job requires me to move across the country the irs just took fucking three hundred stupid dollars from me#my friends live in different states i can't get a job without experience i can't get experience without a job#i can't work on my portfolio with no energy and no time and i dont have any money and everything is so expensive all the time#i can't get anywhere bc i dont drive and im too stressed to think about taking driving lessons again#and WHAT DO I WANT!#THE MOST INTERESTING THING I DO EVERY WEEK IS GO TO PHYSICAL THERAPY!#I AM EXCITED EVERY WEEK FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!! WHY!!!!!!!!#anyway WHATEVER i need to go to bed#delete later#i got into spx. today. so. had to have a crisis about how i felt when i attended spx (energized. excited. a part of something. ambitious)#versus how i feel now (tired. unmotivated. kind of apathetic about art. disconnected)#i dont miss the stress of school but i miss being around other artists. ppl who speak your language and who want the same things you want#ppl who are excited abut art and that makes YOU excited about art. ppl who get you#i miss that i want that back#whatever. its 1am i gotta go shower i have an 8.5 hour shift tomorrow. wahoo. $13.50/hr lets go
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cristobalsifuentes · 1 year
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Hi everyone! Sign-ups for The Righteous Gemzine are now live until October 31st. This is a free, digital fanzine looking for artists to contribute written and/or visual pieces for all things Righteous Gemstones. Please check out the carrd to learn more about the rules, schedule, and more!
You don't need a fully formed idea to sign up; I'm more than happy to work with you throughout the process if you want to just put a spitball idea for the time being! It's okay if your piece changes over the course of the zine. I look forward to working with all of you talented deddies and mommas!
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lilowoof · 27 days
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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wildevenusian · 20 hours
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(​it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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k9wa · 3 months
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⟁ SENSITIVE ft. BOOTHILL.
⠀ — “you get all excited for me to fix you up and call you a good boy.”
⠀ OR
⠀ — a sensitive spot during a repair leaves him melting into your callused little hands.
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⚠︎ mechanic!reader, so much flirting im kind of sick, he whimpers i have an agenda, this is like 90% dialogue sorry, he wants u sooo bad. wc 1k, from this req.
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“y’know darlin,” boothill managed to breathe out through a taut jaw and clenched teeth. “you bein’ this close ain’t exactly helpin’ me focus none.”
your fingers were slow, careful, precise as they pushed a few tiny wires apart, giving view deeper inside the little panel on boothill’s throat.
the position you two stood in was one all too familiar, boothill perched on your workbench with you between his thighs— the only new variables being your face way closer than he’s used to and your fingers proding around in his surprisingly sensitive wires.
it was an…odd sensation, to say the least. a small unpleasant stinging that simultaneously stimulated a rather pleasant shiver up his back with every small poke.
“time and place, cowboy.”
you responded quietly, tone a little flat with your tease from concentration.
“can’t help lettin’ my mind— wander, can i now?” his breath hitched a bit as you nicked a particularly touchy wire.
“if you let me finish this,” you lifted your head enough to meet his eyes, free hand gently smoothing out the crease in his brow. “i’ll let you show me just how wild your imagination can get.”
boothill bit back a scruff chuckle at that. 
“that enough incentive for you to sit still?”
“well, i reckon that’s plent— mmgh!”
a pair of mechanical hands tightly grab onto your hips as his shoulders tense, a knee-jerk result of your tweezers finding the out of place wire you’d been looking around for.
your hands paused, opting to ignore the way he audibly whimpered for raising your gaze a second time to check on him.
“you hangin’ in there?”
boothill’s fingers flexed as they held onto you, relaxing from squeezing your pants to a more gentle cradle of your hips.
“you know,” he swallowed thickly— as if his throat could even dry out, likely just a natural reflex— “you got a way of makin’ fixin’ me up feel real special.”
the slight waver to his voice isn’t lost on your ears— it was quite loud in them, actually.
“i’m hangin’ in fine, don’t worry your pretty head none.”
carefully retracting your tweezers, you stood up straight enough to lightly push his hat up, giving view to his face and cupping your hand over a blue-hued cheek.
“wanna take a break?” 
he nearly had to clutch his chest with the gentle concern that laced your tone.
boothill knew he was flushed, was purposefully avoiding looking you in the eye because a few pokes to some sensitive spots had him sliding his hands to your waist like a lifeline— not that what he could distantly feel of your skin against the synthesised nerves of his palms weren’t doing much to cool him off anyway. but he did…relax, somewhat. 
he always enjoyed when you’d touch his face, getting to feel all the unique little details of you; the gentle drum of your pulse and the little calluses from your tools. it somehow always manages to make the tension in his body ebb away, draining with an exhale that lightly fans against your wrist.
he shook his head with a quiet clear of his throat— another unnecessary function that served more as a tick than anything.
“nah, nah i’m alright.” he assured. it didn’t make him any less embarrassed to be having such a reaction. 
big bad criminal until you get a little too fudgin’ touchy, apparently.
“let’s just get this finished up, yeah? maybe we can move onto somethin’ more pleasant.”
your thumb gave two gentle taps to his cheekbone before it pulled away, reaching for your tweezers for the nth time.
“that’s my boy.”
oh how boothill’s chest bloomed at the simple praise, the endearing ‘my’ that slipped in with it licking up his ribs and curling to rest along where a drumming heart should have been.
“jus’ be gentle with me, will ya sugar plum?”
“you know i've always got ya.”
each plug or untangle of a little yellow or red cable had his systems humming, fingers occasionally curling into your hips every time a little surge left him biting his cheek a little harder.
“we’re almost done,” your voice is icing on an already cavity-inducing cake, though he’ll gladly take a toothache if it’s for you. “just a little longer.”
boothill was going fist to fist and losing with the urge to completely melt under your deft fingers.
“…keep talkin’ to me,” he requested with a murmurmurmur, cautious not to move too much. “helps me stay on t—” he had to bite back another whimper, cheek going between his teeth and eyes going to the ceiling. “—task.”
boothill didn’t miss the little tug of your lips.
“you know, you do this thing when you get shy.” you mused quietly, breath meeting the shell of his ear. “you bite your cheek ‘n look away. it’s cute.”
boothill couldn’t help but let out a breathy chuckle at your deduction. he tried to regain some of his composure, though the colour in his cheeks continued to betray him.
“i don’t know ‘bout shy,” he rumbled, keeping his voice steady as he could. “but i’ll take cute if it means i get to hear you keep sweet talkin’ me. keep this up and i might start enjoyin’ these repairs a lil too much.”
his voice was a little strained, though still held his usual humour.
“like you don’t love em already.” you teased back, gently closing the panel on his neck as it re-sealed with a small hiss. “you get all excited for me to fix you up, call you a good boy and send you on your merry way.”
“i’m still waitin’ on that last bit, y’know?”
you shook your head, popping his hat off his head and placing it on your own.
“good boy,” you pinched his cheek endearingly. “you’re all done. do you want a lolipop too?”
“think i deserve somethin’ a lil sweeter than a lolipop, don’t you sugar?” boothill’s face unknowingly deepens at the sight of you in his hat, brave words betrayed by a nervous tap in his finger and more blue to the apples of his cheeks.
“we’ll save it for when you’ve got a real booboo,” you took his hat off, using the brim to lightly tilt his chin up and give him a tender kiss on the cheek. for such a heavy hunk of metal, he nearly began to float.
“but there’s something to hold your sweet tooth for now.”
“boothill?”
“y..yeah, sweet pea?”
“you’re overheating.”
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⠀ MASTERLIST / GOT A REQUEST ?
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moonstruckme · 3 months
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Haloooo!!! I wanted to request something but I jus wanna say how much i adore your workkksss😭 not to shade other writers but youre probably my fave out of them, theres just something about your writings thats so comforting and I love it!! Can I request a academic rival trope for Remus and reader??🥹 Im excited to read it!! Thank you!!🫶
I'm so glad you enjoy them my love!! Thank you for requesting <3
cw: mention of skipping meals (never fear it is remedied)
Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
Remus is the only other person in the library. You’ve been hopelessly aware of him since he’d sat down four tables away from you an hour ago, and you’re positive he’s being distracting on purpose, because no one really eats chocolate like that. 
It’s abominable and should be punishable by death, honestly, the way he’s getting brown smudges all over the pages of his book. He’ll pop a chocolate in his mouth, let it get all melty in there, then slowly suck the remnants off each of his fingers, the movement distracted and tantalizing. Brow furrowed and eyes sharp, he looks entirely absorbed by his studies. 
You wish you could say the same. 
You’ve read the same page four times now, and the information keeps bouncing off your brain like someone’s put an invisible shield around it. Your eyes burn slightly, your back aches from too long spent in this wooden chair, but you need to know this stuff by tomorrow. Somehow, you need to make yourself retain it. 
“Do you mind?” 
You stop tapping the end of your pencil on the table, looking over at Remus. Your eyes narrow on instinct. 
“Do you?” 
He raises a brow. “I’m not doing anything.” 
“Yes, you are. You keep smacking your lips, it’s irritating.” It’s not, really, it’s…it’s something else. It’s not conducive to a distraction-free study environment, that’s what it is. “Are you even allowed to have those in here?” 
Remus sighs heavily. “Alright.” 
Before you can figure out what he means by that, he’s pushing back his chair, walking over to join you at your table. He holds your gaze as he sits down and then pushes his chocolates towards you, seemingly expectant. 
“What are you doing?” 
“You’re clearly jealous. Go on, have a few.” 
“I am not jealous.” You glare at him, arms folding over your book. It’s a habit, to hide the answers from him, but when you notice his gaze drop to the protective motion you feel silly. “And I’m not eating those. You’ve been licking your fingers and reaching in there, it’s gross.” 
“Oh.” Remus retreats slightly, cheeks pinkening. “I didn’t realize I was, sorry.” 
It’s gratifying to see him embarrassed. He’s the shyest of his group of friends (which is to say, he won’t automatically go and talk the ear off anyone within ten yards of him), but he goes about his day with their same unshakeable confidence, earned by social status and, admittedly, an intimidating academic prowess. Though you’ve always met each other head on in class, you’ve never felt up to par with him in any other respect. It’s nice to feel on a similar playing field. A bit endearing to see this tentative, boyish side to him, too. 
It doesn’t last long enough. 
There’s the barest shift in his expression, but you note with dread that familiar twinkle in Remus’ eyes. “Seems like you’ve been paying more attention to me than your book, hm?” 
Yup, the endearment is gone. 
“I’m basically done studying for the night anyway,” you lie through your teeth. “I was just finishing up.” 
Remus’ brow lifts. He clearly doesn’t believe you. “Good for you. How long have you been here?” 
“Since five.” It’s the truth this time, and you say it proudly. You want to show him that you work harder than him, are better, but your smugness fizzles out when he frowns. 
“That long?” Remus asks, looking less defeated and more…troubled. “You must be exhausted. I was only going to put a couple of hours in.” 
It nettles you, the implication that he can do better than you by studying half the time. You shrug with feigned insouciance. “I guess we’ll see who does better tomorrow.” 
“Did you miss dinner?” He breezes right by the challenge, leaning forward as his brows come down. “You must have taken a break then.” 
You cross your arms, appraising him as he does you. What is he playing at? 
“I don’t take breaks, Remus.” I work hard. I play to win. 
Remus hums, eyes still on you. It’s a struggle not to squirm under his gaze. After a minute, he sighs. 
“Okay,” he says, starting to pack up his things. He puts his chocolates back in his bag. “I would offer you some of these, but you’ve made your thoughts about that known. I guess all that’s left is to go to the kitchens.” 
You look up at him as he stands. “What are you talking about?”
“You can’t just not eat before the exam, love. It wouldn’t be fair.” 
“To who?” 
“To either of us. You need to do well, and I need to know you can do well so that I do well.” He leans against the table, a soft curve to his bottom lip. Like you’re friends. “Come on, grab your things.” 
“I can’t just—” You shake your head incredulously. “I still have to study.” 
“I thought you were done studying.” 
“I—not—not all the way done,” you hedge, cheeks warming. Remus smiles like you’re funny. 
“Let’s be done for tonight,” he says in a gentle tone. It’s not so different from his usual voice, and yet the sound of it caresses your nerves, lulling them to rest. “There’ll be time before the exam tomorrow. You’ve put in plenty of hours already, and those won’t do you any good without food and sleep.” 
You bite the inside of your lip, considering this. Though you’ve tried to ignore it, you are tired. The bone-deep, heavy kind, from a week of exams that have left you nearly in tatters. You’re afraid that if you take to your bed now, getting out again may seem more trouble than it’s worth. 
“And,” Remus adds offhandedly, “if beating my score is your goal, I like your odds. You’ve been studying all night, and I hardly opened my book a half hour ago.” 
You blink up at him. Remus seems to realize you’re not going to start packing up yourself and, with a long-suffering sigh, begins doing it for you. “Why aren’t you staying to study?” you ask. 
He shrugs. “I don’t mind going to the kitchens with you. And would you really go if I stayed here and studied?” 
“No,” you answer honestly. 
He gives you a wry, knowing look. “Then I suppose it’s a small price to pay.”
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mattsautumn · 2 months
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Can’t wear that - Chris Sturniolo
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Summary:
Warnings: swearing, possessive behavior, sexual content, smut, use of y/n, sex, fingering, eating out, uhhh if there’s anything else lmk!
A/N: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 300+ LIKES ON MY LAST POST. THATS INSANE? ily all so so sososososoosos much❤️ also english is not my first language so im sorry if there are any mistakes.
(I love this song sm🤭)
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You and Chris never had any arguments. Most of the time you guys were the ‘perfect’ couple. Today wasn’t one of those days.
Chris and you were planning to go to a party a friend of Chris has planned. You were very excited about going and you even bought a dress. The bad thing about this story is that the dress is extremely short and revealing.
Obviously Chris wouldn’t let you go out like that, so you started arguing.
“I don’t know where you think we’re going, but you’re not gonna wear that outfit.” He says, already getting frustrated by the whole idea.
“Yes i am, you don’t decide that for me.”
Chris stands up, his face red with anger. He walks over to you and grabs your arm, pulling you towards him. “I don’t care what you say right now. You’re not leaving this house looking like that. I don’t want anyone else seeing you like this.”
You push him away, trying to get free from his grip. He stumbles back a bit from the force of your push but quickly recovers. “This is not a normal dress, it's too fucking revealing.” He yells at you.
“No it’s not! Grow up Chris.” You yell back.
Chris loses his temper and grabs you by the waist, lifting you off the ground. “Shut up! You're not going anywhere looking like that! I don't care if you hate me for it, but you're changing before we leave this house!" he says, his voice loud and angry. You flinch at the outburst. Chris sees the flinch and immediately feels guilty. He sets you down gently and takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. “Listen, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. But I can’t let you go to that party dressed like that.”
“It’s fine.” You say before walking over to your dresser to grab a new one.
He watches you walk away, his anger slowly fading into concern. He follows you to the closet and stands in the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest. “Which one are you going to choose?” he asks, trying to sound calm and reasonable instead of angry.
“This one i guess.” I say as i hold up a less revealing dress. He looks at the dress you've chosen and nods in approval. “That one is much better. It’s more... appropriate.” He steps aside to let you change, still feeling guilty about losing his temper earlier. “I’ll wait for you outside. Take your time.” He says. You give him a quick nod before going back to changing.
Chris leaves the room, closing the door gently behind him. He leans against the door, taking deep breaths and trying to calm himself down. He knows he overreacted, but he can’t shake off this feeling of protectiveness when it comes to you.
After a while you come out in a new, less revealing dress. Chris looks up as you come out of the room and his eyes widen in surprise. He takes a step towards you and reaches out to touch the fabric of your dress. “Wow, you look beautiful. I’m sorry I acted like such an idiot earlier.”
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it. Shall we go?” I ask. He nods, feeling a mix of relief and gratitude that you’re forgiving him so easily. “Yeah, let’s go. But promise me you’ll stay close to me tonight, okay? I don’t want to lose you in the crowd.” He says.
“Yeah of course Chris.” Chris smiles, feeling a sense of contentment wash over him as he walks beside you to the party. He keeps a protective arm around your waist, scanning the room for any potential threats or dangers. “Let’s have some fun tonight, okay? But remember, you’re mine, and I don’t share.”
The party went well. You met a few girls, whom are influencers. They talked with you as Chris was there being his protective self and holding your hand. Around midnight Chris grabbed your arm, without a word. He grabs you by the hand and pulls you towards the exit, his mind racing with dirty thoughts.
“Chrisssss..” you say, knowing what he was up to.
As soon as you’re back at his place, Chris wastes no time. He pushes you against the wall, his lips crashing onto yours as he hungrily devours you. "Fuck, I need you now.. you look fucking incredible all the time.”
“Really? how bad?” You ask, teasing him. He grins, his hands trailing down your body as he pulls you closer. He can already tell how turned on you are, and it only fuels his desire. "Bad enough that I would bend you over right here if I thought you could handle it."
“What makes you think i can’t?” You ask.
He reaches down and grabs your ass, giving it a hard squeeze. "Because I know you cant control yourself when I dominate you. And right now, I'm feeling particularly dominant." He lifts you up, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“Well then, why don’t you show me?” You ask, smiling innocently. He immediately carries you over to the couch and throws you down onto it, following immediately behind you. Suddenly.. you both are naked. He kicks your legs apart and buries his face between your thighs, eating you out with reckless abandon. "Fuck, you taste so good." He speaks between laps, his hands gripping your thighs.
“Oh god baby…” you moan out. He grins at your words, loving how much he affects you. He continues to eat you out, working every inch of your pussy with his tongue. His fingers slide inside of you, curling up to hit that spot deep within. "You're mine, aren't you?"
“all yours Chris, all yours!” You scream out in pleasure.
Chris stands up, letting your orgasm, making you whimper at the loss. "This is all yours." He positions himself at your entrance, slowly pushing inside of you. He loves the feeling of being buried deep inside of you. "Say it again."
“All yours.. fuck.” You say as you feel him stretching you out like crazy.
He slowly starts to thrust his hips, building a steady rhythm. "Damn right I am." His hands grip your hips, pulling you towards him hard on every thrust. "You're mine to fuck, to possess, to worship."
You feel yourself getting closer to the edge within seconds. Chris can feel how close you are to your release. He speeds up his thrusts, wanting to bring you over the edge. "Let go for me baby." With every word, he slams into you harder and deeper.
“Oh fuck i cant!” You manage to moan out between the heavy breaths leaving your mouth. He reaches between your legs, rubbing your clit in fast circles. "Yes, you can. Fuck, you're gonna come all over my cock." He continues to thrust and rub your clit, pushing you towards your climax. "Now, baby..!" He demands, his own release coming. You let go, feeling waves of pleasure flowing over you. As you let go, Chris feels his own orgasm hitting. He slams into you one last time, spilling himself deep inside of you as he groans out your name. "Fuck....fuck...yes, just like that."
Heavy breaths leave our mouths as we’re both left insanely sweaty and tired. Chris leans down to kiss you deeply. "Fuck, that was amazing." He stays buried deep inside of you for a moment before pulling out.
“That was amazing.. thank you Chris..” you say, smiling slightly.
Chris smiles and kisses your forehead. "Glad you enjoyed it." He looks down at his softening cock then back at you. "Want me to clean up or are you gonna stay in bed for the rest of the day?" He smirks, already knowing the answer.
“Both please…” you say. He chuckles and gets up from the bed, walking to the bathroom. He returns to the bedroom a few minutes later with a warm, damp cloth. "Here, let me clean you up."
He gently cleans you, making sure to be extra gentle. Then later tosses the cloth aside and crawls back into bed with you. "There we go. All cleaned up." He wraps his arms around you, pulling you close. "You okay?"
“Im so okay.”
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First Chris fanfic?!?! I love y’all sm thanks for the support!💖
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sugarnspice630 · 5 months
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PLEASE im begging you can you please write mean dom!Seonghwa x sub fem!reader but the reader has daddy kink
Hi anon! Thank you so much for you request love! I am happy to write this for you. I hope you enjoy, and have fun!
•pairing: mean!dom!Seonghwa x fem!sub!reader
•word count: 2k
•tags: soft to mean dom Hwa, daddy kink (obviously), teasing, reader is very horny, hair pulling, leash tugging, collars, oral (m receiving), ass smacking, vibrator use (f receiving) ...did I miss anything? probably
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆───
“Seonghwa, I can’t help it! You have this control over me that no one else has, and my body craves you constantly!” You begged. You had been begging Seonghwa to help you out for hours now. You were horny all day, and you just had an itch that only Seonghwa’s dick inside you could satisfy. No toy you used on yourself today was cutting it.
“Oh really? You like me that much, huh?” He cooed as he placed his hand on top of your head. You couldn’t help but whimper at his touch. You wanted him badly. Your eyes began to haze over as your body turned itself on autopilot and went into a sexual daze. The look on your face was one of eternal bliss. Having Seonghwa just lightly touch you was driving you mad, but of course you wanted more. No matter how much you whimpered and moaned softly at his touches, he was not giving in to your plea. As a matter of fact, he enjoyed watching you struggle like this. It sent chills through his body to see you so down bad for him.
“I-I can’t help it.” 
“I know you can’t~.” He taunts as he runs his hand down the side of your face and rests his fingers under your chin, lifting his finger up so you are forced to look up at his face. He stares into your eyes for a few seconds, and you can’t help but feel a pool of wetness begin to form in your panties. The forceful gaze in his eyes was enough to make you want to rip your clothes off right there and have him take his way with you.
“D-daddy~?” He hums in response to the nickname, still looking deep into your eyes. “I....I can't take this feeling anymore!”
“Well, I don't know~. I’m not sure how to help out my little whore~.” You had enough of his taunting and quickly grabbed onto the sleeves of his shirt.
“Please daddy! Do something!” You cried out and pouted. Desperation was flowing out of your voice.
“But it's so much fun seeing you like this~. So desperate for me.”
“I-I'll do anything~!” You whimper and grip tighter on his sleeves.
“Anything?”
“Y-Yes! A-anything! Whatever daddy wants!” He pauses on your words for a few seconds, delaying your so-sought-after release even longer while he thinks about what he should do.
"Well, what I want-.” He stops mid-sentence, grips the back of your head, and pushes you down to the ground. You fall to your knees with a whimper at his force. Lifting your head up by your hair, you see him lick his lips and teeth before pulling his face into a smirk. “-is for you to suck.” He uses his free hand to guide his belt off and pull his pants down just past his hips. You eagerly reach out to help him pull his underwear off so you can start pleasing him. You knew you were not going to get any special treatment if you didn’t please him first. He chuckles at your eagerness, excited to see you under his command, but he pulls you away from his crotch with the hand wrapped in your hair. You let your mouth hang open slightly and looked up at him, confused.
“Since you're gonna act like an obedient pet, I might as well do this.” He grabs your collar, which was adorned around your neck, to signify that you were his, and attaches a leather leash to the ring in the front. “Much better~.” He purrs out. He wraps the leash firmly in his hand and pulls you back towards him; now your face is just inches from his rock-hard cock. You whimper when he tugs on the leash as you fall forward a little bit, but your balance is good since you’ve had lots of practice being on your knees in front of him. You open your mouth and gently kitten lick his tip; he shudders in response to your action.
"Fuck, you’re so good for me.” You start to take more of him into your mouth, making sure to lick and please him just how he likes it. Seonghwa is letting out groans and huffs from above you, motivating you to make him feel good so you can get rewarded as well. Occasionally, he rocks his hips into your mouth, forcing his cock to hit the back of your throat. Your eyes fill with tears as you gag slightly, but you don’t let it stop you. Suddenly, Seonghwa pulls you off of his cock. Confused, you let out a whimper at the lack of oral fixation in your mouth.
“After I lay down, get on the bed. Ass facing me and up in the air.”
“H-Hwa-.” You stutter out, your brain foggy from being thrown off course.
“I’m not asking you again.” He snarls as he tugs up on the leash, lifting your body up, and then drops the leash from his hand to make his way over to the bed. You nod softly with a small pout on your face. His demeanor changed so quickly, and you wonder what happened. You watched as he laid on the bed and patted his leg for you to come over to him. You got up onto the bed and crawled over to him, lining your body up right above where his cock was, then turning around so your ass was facing him and your mouth was aligned right near his member. Seonghwa grabbed onto your knees and pulled them closer to his body, causing you to fall forward closer to his dick, letting out a soft chuckle.
“You are going to finish me off while I play with you. Got it?”
“Y-yes daddy.” You feel a harsh smack on your bare cheek and whimper out.
“What was that? Didn’t quite hear you.”
“Yes daddy!”
“Now back to sucking slut~.” 
Seonghwa firmly smacked your ass again, making you let out a moan. You wasted no time getting back to business. As if you had no interruption in between, you slide all of him back in your mouth, not caring about your gag reflex or anything. He was still slick with the pre-cum you had spread around before moving locations. While you were sucking, you felt Seonghwa’s weight shift on the bed. That must mean he was leaning over to grab something. You continued to suck him off when a faint buzzing sound in your ear preceded a small “oops” from Seonghwa, and then the buzzing stopped. He had grabbed the vibrator that was next to the bed. It was your all-time favorite one to use. Your face flushed red, but you continued to do your job by bobbing your head back and forth. Seonghwa placed the toy against you and rubbed it along your slit, making sure you were indeed ready to take it inside you. Seonghwa turns on the vibrator, and immediately, you feel more motivated to suck him to completion. You moaned around his dick.
“You’re such a fucking whore.” Seonghwa says lowly as he feels your passion coming through. Grinding your hips up and down to get more pleasure from the vibrator. Seonghwa pushes it deeper into you, and you place your hands on the sides of his legs, allowing you to take him further down your throat. Your hands grip onto the bedsheet, and you moan around him again. Eyes filled with tears, but not a single sad thought running through your head. To change up the pace of things, you slide yourself off of Seonghwa and stick your tongue out to lick him from base to tip. Panting out as you do so due to the pressure in your stomach building up from your favorite toy.
“F-fuck~.” Seonghwa mutters out. You can’t see him, but you know he is tilting his head back in ecstasy cause you are making him feel so good. Seonghwa changes the speed on the vibrator to increase the vibrations, rubbing it up and down your pussy and, every once in a while, sliding the tip of the toy into your hole. Enough to tease you and drive you crazy.
“D-daddy~? I need you n-now~.” The desperation for his cock had been building up, and you figured if you begged nicely, you could get what you wanted. 
“You’re gonna get what I give you, and that’s it. Don’t you dare ask me for things like that.” He says through gritted teeth. Fuck, guess you’re not getting anything. “But since you want to whore yourself out to me-.” He pauses his sentence as he takes the vibrator off of you and slides himself out from underneath you, forcing you back down on your hands and knees on the bed. He rips your panties off of you, and you feel the cool air blow across your soaked area. “I’m gonna be as rough with you as I want.” Seonghwa grabs the sides of your hips harshly and forces himself inside of you. “Fuck!” You moan loudly at the sudden intrusion.
"Mmm, that toy got you nice and ready for Daddy~.” He grips tighter onto your hips, his nails digging into your skin, definitely leaving marks. 
“T-This was way before the toy d-daddy~.” 
“Shut up.” He barks as he leans his body down and reaches out to grab the leash still wrapped around you. He wraps it around his hand again for a good grip and pulls it back toward him. The tightness of the collar pushing into your airway and choking you out just the slightest bit. You can feel him picking up speed as he continues to lean down against your back. The angle his dick is hitting you makes you feel so good.
“Mm fuck~ my little fucktoy feels great tonight~.” His free hand smacks the side of your ass, and he continues to pound into you. You can’t help but moan and whimper at the sensation. The tugging on the leash making you see faint stars in your vision. His hand leaves your hip and grabs the back of your head.
“Such a fucking slut~! Does this little bitch crave more~?” You nod your head softly and let out a closed-mouth moan. Seonghwa, with no hesitation, pushes your head into the bed, shoving your face down into the mattress. “You dirty fucking whore~. Taking pleasure from being a toy~.” He halts his thrusts. With the hand still on the back of your hair, he grips your hair, pulls your head up, and leans down to your ear as close as he can, whispering softly. “How pathetic~.” You wince at the lack of pleasure inside and from him pulling your hair.
“I-I am pathetic~.”
“Damn right you are~.” He continues his thrusts, pounding into you harder than before. You are nothing but a moaning mess. Such beautiful noises for Seonghwa, and only Seonghwa. “Mmm I fucking love those moans~.” He lets go of your head and brings that hand back to your side. Forcefully smacking your ass yet again.
“Mm~ y-yes~!” You moan out and then bite your lip.
"Fuck, you’re clenching around me slut.” Seonghwa tilts his head back and lets his mouth hang open. Letting out a couple groans. Your voice is practically gone from all the moaning you have been doing tonight. Seonghwa also fucked your throat raw not that long ago, so you were extremely sensitive.
“D-Daddy~!” Your voice comes in and out from a moan cutting in between.
“W-whore~!” He mocks your plea from earlier. You felt the knot inside you tighten, but you dared not to cum before Seonghwa.
“I-I can feel myself getting close b-but~ ah~ I-I'm not stopping~! J-just keep going till you c-cum.”
“Good fucking girl, letting me use you for my pleasure.” Those were the last words you heard before your brain shut off and you just let Seonghwa continue to use you for the rest of the night.
Tags: @pre1ttyies @isiloiale @moongoddess1982 @xuchiya @yeosangsbbg @sanipan @10nantscompanion @sanspuppet@myloveforyunho@sugawara-levi
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doomsday ◦ h.j
—Sometimes doomsday wasn't the crumbling of a city; doomsday was an apocalypse of the mind
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@anon im so glad you requested this bc I literally loved writing it so much like it fr had my creative juices FLOWING so feel free to request anytime babes
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Paring ◦ Han x reader
Words ◦ 5231
Genre ◦ Hurt and comfort, ngl this angsty asf
Warnings ◦ han is a dick at the beginning but he is redeemed, panic attacks, language (like fr so many fucks in this its wild), talk about wasting your life, anxiety, fear, han is such a cunt at first its insane, not edited, uhhh I think that's it.
A/N ◦ This one is chaotic asf so if you don't like my chaotic writing this is definitely where you might wanna click off 💀ALSO IF YOU LIKED THIS PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME like it literally doesn't have to be much you can just be like it was pretty cool
~CookieCreates🍪
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Sometimes it felt like Han gave away the numbers of the clock like dollar bills, bartering off a life that only ever seemed to be rushing away like a river roaring down the rocks too fast. He scoops little moments out from the shimmering rapids, but time still trickles between his fingers; the hours melting together like wax dripping down the spindly hands, its bony fingers-
reaching
reaching
r e a c h i n g
out to him, pulling him into a pool at the bottom of his feet, a pool of glittering, glowing memories.
Is this all life is?
Working
Stressing
Never sleeping
Never eating
Is the praise worth it?
Those hopeless nights, endless days, tired eyes, and a mind made of mush—was it all worth it?
Was any of it worth it?
The roar of the crowds drowning out the sound of the seconds-
tick
tick
ticking away, the shuffle of the sand seeping into the bottom of the hourglass—he taps the crystal dome, wondering how much of it is left—wondering when it all will stop.
When he can stop.
Han was a fizzing bottle of soda—shook for too long—today was hard; every day before a comeback is: producing, singing, dancing, learning, watching, waiting-
Checking off boxes on a list that never ended, so when he finally walks into the door of your shared apartment, a room he feels like he hasn't seen in weeks, he doesn't really notice you anxiously sitting on the couch, your knees bouncing on the floor mindlessly-
snapping
snapping
snapping
on the linoleum, something so simple shouldn't set him off, sure, but the sound was so familiar—so scary—it vibrated in his head, booming in his brain seconds-
ticking
ticking
ticking away
your feet
snapping
snapping
snapping on the ground.
He comes home to get away from the world rushing out from under him, so why were you sitting there being so fucking-
“Hannie!” You beam, sprinting over to throw your arms around his neck, breathing his scent in. It feels like centuries since you've seen him last. You vibrate with nervous, excited energy, practically bouncing up and down; but the thing was, right now he didn't want to be touched.
He didn't want to be held
He didn't want to have to talk
He didn't want to have to remember he had a life outside of the bubble that was his work. It felt like he was tending to gardens he didn't know how to grow. Your relationship had already sprouted; the seed planted a while ago, but even though the delicate stages of its development had passed, that didn't mean that it still didn't have to be cared for, and right now, he didn't care about anything. 
It was selfish, sure, but when you've spent your whole life giving parts of yourself away, selfishness seems so easy, at least while you still have small slivers of your soul left. 
He grates his teeth, everything seeming so wholly overwhelming, the walls encapsulating him in an unbreakable hourglass. He was so stressed, so tired, so done, so trapped. His breath stutters when you squeeze him tighter, nuzzling your nose against his shirt, staring up at him expectantly, eyes shimmering. 
"I haven't hugged you in forever I missed your face" you giggle voice like clouds of cotton candy but not quite sweet enough to dull the sour feeling settling in his stomach
He knows that love should never feel this hard, but right now everything he did felt hard, and the way you stare at him so longingly like you're going to combust if he doesn't perform, put on a fake smile, and act like everything is okay makes him feel like a fizzing bottle of soda with a lid screwed on too tight, and when you grip him tighter, trying to push an answer out of him
He flips his lid. 
"Holy shit, y/n, do you have to be so bombarding?" He snaps, pushing your arms away from him, almost looking disgusted. Your smile slips, staring at him in shock, still not really registering what he said. 
He doesn't know what feels worse—the way your features tremble with hurt or the way he knows he doesn't care. 
"I'm tired; I just want to go to bed, okay, and you are immediately rushing me; every day as soon as I get through the door, it's exhausting."
"You can't be serious," you whisper, genuinely believing what you said. He couldn't be serious. There was no way in hell he really believed that, but it didn't matter if he believed it or not; it all still hurt the same.
He wishes he could overlook the flames that flare in your eyes, consuming the stars that always seemed to shimmer.
What did he just do?
He sighs, collapsing onto the couch, digging the palms of his hands into his drooping eyes. He was so scared; the fear loosing his lips and everybody knows words of fear are the greatest lies. 
"Yes, I'm serious. Do you know how much work you are? I work all day, work, work, work, work everybody needs me always wanting, always needing something, something, fucking something," he growls, smacking his hands against his thighs, thrown into an unexplainable rage. "And as soon as I get home, you need me too; everybody is so fucking needy." The next words he says feel like an earthquake erupted in your soul, splitting your heart in two. 
"Your so fuckin' needy."
You flutter your eyelashes shut, pushing back emotions that boil in your brain. There are so many feelings fighting for the light, but instead of screaming, crying, or lashing out, you take a deep breath and fold your arms, calmly asking 
"Then why don't you just break up with me then?" There is nothing more terrifying than a woman whose fire rages behind a veil of ice, but when he looks up, watching the flames wrap around your posture, wisping around every edge of your bones, and even with the ashes of the love you once had for him fluttering in the wind, he still opens his big, fat, fucking mouth. 
"Or maybe I should have just never asked you out in the first place." No sooner did he spit the sentence out, did he want to shove it right back in his mouth. Your shoulders droop, eyes filling with an almost impossible amount of pain.
The earth crumbles, the walls of your shared home collapsing around you, rubble lost in all the memories that flicker away like embers floating from the burning configuration that was your relationship. It was ironic how the world worked; it took years to build up the love you felt and only a single sentence to wash it all away. You never thought you would see armageddon, but when those letters left his lips, you quickly realized sometimes doomsday wasn't the crumbling of a city; doomsday was an apocalypse of the mind. 
"Okay," you croak, hot tears streaming down your face; a wobbly smile pulls at your lips almost out of habit, facial muscles forced out of memory. 
You have never once imagined yourself drowning under so many words left unsaid, sinking in the waves of tears you fought back, and as you trudged up the stairs, sinking into your bed, you wondered when you would hear the begrudging footsteps—the hesitant knocks. Wondered when you'd hear his soft apology—a voice racked with guilt—but your fantasy never came.
All you heard was the clicking of the clock behind you, counting down the hours where he disappointed you again and again
You don't know what got to you first—the peirce of realization that he didn't regret the bitter insults that left his lips so easily or when you saw the calendar that peaked from the corner of your closet-
5 days
5 days left unmarked
5 days left blank
5 days until you celebrated your 3 year anniversary
Han Jisung would never know you were counting down the days
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Han should have runned after you, and in perspective, after a good night's sleep and a nice warm meal, he has never felt so completely stupid for not, but after you trudged up the stairs with a pained smile and glassy eyes, he was so starkly shocked he had said something so disgustingly distasteful his feet stuck to the ground, and finally, after hours of staring at the pool of time bubbling by his shoes, he drifted into a restless sleep. 
It was as though his terror tainted him, making the glassy parts of his heart dirty, and when he took the edge off, it was like a harsh wipe away at all the murk, revealing his jarring reflection in the pearly mirror.
He was such a jerk
He whimpers, running anxious fingers through his hair. He has no viable excuse, no good reason why he treated you so poorly—for someone so obsessed with time, he should know that you can't get your life back—can't turn the hands of the clock 
Push rewind
Hit replay
For what value would life be if you could just start it all over again? The impossibility made all the precious moments sweeter, but like every good thing, it made memories like these all the more foul.
You didn't deserve that
He didn't deserve you
and as you slink down the stairs, eyes red-rimmed and puffy. He can't stop that booming voice biting at the back of his brain.
How long will it take you before you realize that too?
You flick your gaze to him, burning with loathing cloaked behind layers of indifference. It floors him—those subtle signs of hatred that swim in the back of your eyelids, hidden in small twitches of your features, your almost tangibly cut off, throwing up your walls, shutting him out in more ways than one.
He had always worried about the gardens he was growing; flowers that sprung around him rapidly, fighting to figure out which one to water first, and all while your petals wilted and your roots curled up-
You waited
You watched as he bled himself dry. He shutters, everything bursting before his eyes—the love you once had for him flickering like the last flashes of a dying star. You're a million miles away, dancing on the craters of the moon, fluttering around the twinkling rings of Saturn. He folds himself deeper into the couch, almost hoping it will swallow him whole—pull him into the burning inferno beneath—even hell would be cooler than the fire that was your gaze.  Han Jisung never thought he'd see the day when the galaxy would collapse, but staring at you, flaring your final goodbyes, he realizes that doomsday was closer than he thought. 
"Baby," he whispers, his voice heavy with guilt, how easy it is to start a fire when you don't care about putting it out, but now that the wisps of flame consume you, he wishes he had never given you the kindling. 
You don't look at him as you walk around the kitchen, pouring a bowl of cereal. He stands up hesitantly, anguish feeling like an iron rod through his chest. He creeps into the kitchen, stepping lightly into the room like it's laced with landmines. 
"Please." His voice cracks—splits right down the middle, a perfect reflection of the cleave that was his soul. "I'm so sorry."
You place the cereal back in the cabinet and open the fridge to retrieve the milk.
The silence is deafening.
The all too familiar-
tick
tick
tick
of time trickling away rings in his ears
How much more of it does he have left?
How much more of this silence can he take?
You ignore him, strolling right past his trembling frame, racked with regret. It pulsates off his in palpable waves. You're so nonchalant so careless. He almost wants you to turn around and smack him, throw that stupid bowl of cereal in his face. Instead, you jog up the stairs, slamming the door behind you.
Is that the only door you shut?
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Han had always thought of the apocalypse as an idea only found in novels, tucked away behind the pages of a book, hidden in the comfortable corner of science fiction, because that's all it was, right— fiction? But as your dead eyes scrape his figure up and down, he realizes that Doomsday wasn't really fiction at all. Just like the world wasn't always a place, sometimes the world was a person, and right now his world was ravaged by a deadly disease, an illness that only infected the soul, an illness only transferred through the careless bitter words found in the English language. Fire was nature's greatest purifier, and sure, the walls of the home he lived in weren't warped with flames of your fury, but the home he had made in your heart was 
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It's been 3 days
3 days since he's felt the touch of another human. 
3 days since he made the biggest mistake of his lifetime.
3 days since he dropped a devasting bomb on your relationship, and the shrapnel was finally hitting him; curled pieces of cold metal lodged somewhere in between the folds of his soul. 
3 brutal bone-crushing days of pure ear-splitting silence—It was almost scientifically impossible, just how quiet you were. It was an art really, every brush of anguish accurately painted on—every ignored apology, every piercing glare, every single star that flickered out in your eyes. You were strategic, meticulous, you were plain vicious-
and you had every right to be.
You were fully justified in your actions, and yet he felt like he was still teetering over the edge of madness. The thought of losing you like a noose snaking around his neck, choking him in an unadulterated form of terror 
He has been stricken by anxiety his whole life, but the thought of a world without you filled him with an inexplicable amount of fear—the kind that burrows in your bones, decaying in your soul—the kind of terror that your still stuck digging from your skin for centuries to come—the kind of fear that makes you simply
panic.
His hands shake as he pushes the door open, feeling like he's walking into an open war. The pages of a dystopia form walls around him, caging him inside a bombarding capsule of storming English. 
The harsh contrast of the hurricane in his mind and the indifference in your eyes sends him reeling. You were lying on the couch, mindlessly flipping through the channels, not sparing him a glance.
You were so beautiful so breathtaking, but for once, he wasn't admiring your beauty.
He was
falling
apart. 
Oh, fuck, he was freaking out. 
He had finally caved under the pressure of always having to perform a false, flimsy smile, wobbling on his lips, pretending to be okay as he watched the life drain out of your eyes; the passion seeping from his songs.
He loved making music, but what is art without chaos?
What is beauty without love?
What is the world without you?
He always had to be perfect; he always had to be put together. He was always running on all cylinders, always hanging on by a fraying straining thread, and finally, it snapped. 
The earth is
t i l t i n g,
flipping around,
turning upside down, and
i n s i d e o u t.
Guilt rips through his chest, yanking out harsh bouts of oxygen from his constricting lungs. 
He can't breathe
He can't breathe
He can't breathe
He can't fucking
b
r
e
a
t
h
e
He was going to die-
He was going to collapse into himself, busting into a flaring supernova. 
He was going to be his own demise-
Forming his own doomsday-
He has never thought of himself as an author, but before he could stop his mouth from moving, he was already caged between the sentences of his own personal apocalypse, living a waking nightmare.
He created a story with his stupidity, and now he has to pay the price. 
He was the end of your relationship-
what has he done?
He can't b r e a t h e
"Y-Y/n I can't," he choked on his words, watching the walls wash away like watercolor dripping down the page. 
He can't lose you
He can't lose you
He can't lose you
He's going to die
He stumbles into the living room, tripping over his feet, his breath staggering in his throat. He catches himself on the arm of the couch, digging his nails into the soft leather, gripping it like it was his tether, keeping him from floating into space—burning up in the atmosphere, his body bouncing around the icy rocks. 
"Fuck," he gasps, squeezing his eyes shut and clawing at his chest, almost as if he scratches his skin hard enough, he can finally pull out the hourglass that keeps ticking his time away. His heart pounded wildly, almost begging to be free from the confines of his ribcage. The fact that it was still beating was beyond him. 
His heart only beats for you.
His heart will only ever beat for you.
How was he alive when you were drifting away? moon dust dancing in your lungs, would you become a ruler of the skies, while he was still stood still? 
"Han," your voice sounds like cotton candy kisses and honey dribbles. He never thought he would ever be so happy to hear somebody so alarmed, but right now that was the only thing keeping him from shattering. 
You jump up from the couch, your face pulled in concern. 
He doesn't deserve it
Doesn't deserve it
Doesn't deserve it
He's drowning in a pool of his self-inflicted sorrows. He's sinking, and the only thing that could save him was you. 
How do you save a man who won't take your hand?
"N-No, im okay," he barley pushes the words out, weaving between the thick lump that's forming in his throat. 
It was a lie
Everything was a lie
That's all he was
a liar
"Han," your voice is warm and inviting, sucking him in, wrapping around him like a blanket in the cold, a bowl of soup to a sick stomach. You healed him even when he was the one who created the wound. You pull him in, taking his trembling frame into your arms. Gentle fingers thread through his hair as soft lullabied wispers float through the air.
He feels so safe
So secure-
So loved-
He never thought he would feel the tenderness of your touch again, so when your comforting arms squeeze him right off the edge of destruction, 
He
c o l l a p s e s
crumbling into a million sobbing, sniveling pieces before you, he sinks to the ground, dragging you along with him. 
He always brought you down-
Always took you with him-
He was a disease-
An infection-
He was your armageddon
He sags against your body, limply moving like a rag doll. You let him curl into your chest, holding him like pieces of pierced punctuation. 
You guys were a shattered semicolon inverted and upside down. 
There was so much he wanted to say—so many apologies, so many explanations, so many different synonyms for sorry—but you didn't need them; you never needed them; you needed him, and there was nothing he could ever say that would change that. 
You hum, rubbing soothing circles on his back. You were always the perfect metaphor, a marveling form of pristine poetry. Your touch was like fleeting promises on the skin, the delicate tickle of a blooming flower, the comfortable heat of a burning star. You weren't just his world; you were his universe.
He pulls you closer to him, clinging like a desperate dying animal, nuzzling his face in your neck. 
"I'm so sorry, baby, I'm so fucking sorry!" He blubbers the sentences onto your skin, as though the deeper he burrows into your body, the faster they can travel to your heart. 
"Han," you lull, a small smile grazing your face, physically having to claw him off of you. He does begrudgingly, a minuscule whimper tumbling out of his throat from the lack of contact; he doesn't meet your eyes. He can't—not when the clock still ticks your time away, not when he's still not fully sure that you're willing to turn the hands back. 
He's devastated, his eyes red and puffy with tears that cascade down his cheeks, shining in the overhead light. 
"Please don't leave me." He sniffles, rubbing his nose against the fabric of his shirt, bottom lip trembling. "I don't want our time to run out. All my time is running out. Everything is running out. I can't, I-" he stutters, tripping over letters that latch onto his teeth like cactuses digging into his lips. 
You furrow your brows, tilting your head in sympathetic confusion. "What do you mean, baby?"
He screws his eyes shut, his hands shaking almost aggressively on his thighs. Why did he say anything? How does he explain something like that? He tries to form the words on his tongue, but they stick to the roof of his mouth like glue. Speaking it into the universe makes it so much more real, so much more raw, because now it isn't a metaphor, a fictional little whisper that fucks with his mind. 
The earth quivers in its orbit as he opens his mouth-
Was he really going to admit this?
Was he even ready to admit this?
"It feels like my life is running out," he stammers, the words tasting so sour on his tongue. "My life is so stressful; everybody always needs something from me, and sometimes it feels like I'm dishing out so many slivers of my soul that I don't even have any of it left." He lets out a shaky breath, attempting to get his heart rate somewhere that resembles normal. 
"I'm always up, always working, always doing something, and it's scary to think while I'm wasting my life working so hard doing something I don't really love." He aggressively wipes the tear that drops down his cheek with the palm of his hand. "It's so scary wondering if I'm ever making the right decisions." 
He feels so small under your gaze.
"A-And the other day was so hard," he cries, fresh waves of tears blurring his vision as he reminisces on the events. 
"Everybody was yelling at me, always needing something demanding so fucking much; they were playing puppet, forcing my hands in a way they didn't want to move; everybody was so just so needy-"
"And so was I," you whisper, filled with guilt. It breaks him. Your so understanding, so loving, so forgiving, so perfect. 
How did he even get you?
His heart wrenches as he dives into your arms-
"No, no, no, no," he shouts, shaking his head against your shirt. "No, love, you didn't do anything wrong; it was me. Me and my shitty mood—it was all my fault. I blew up at you. You were trying to be the amazing, loving girlfriend you are, and what I said was solely because of my fear. The exhaustion and anger didn't exactly help either"
"But there are no more buts," he pulls away, catching your eyes burning with sincerity. "There is no excuse for the way I treated you; there is no justification, just explanation."
You smile, tilting your head in adoration. You would be lying if you didn't say you were relieved, because you were.  You thought he believed the words he said—what feels like forever ago—that you were the annoying, needy girlfriend that only ever bugged him, but he didn't believe what he said. No, he was just a ticking time bomb waiting to blow—a ball of stressed and nervous energy channeled into the wrong source. 
"It's okay, Hannie, really, we're okay"
He was a supernova—a burning, bursting flame of bright, beautiful colors 
Han had once thought that the stars in your eyes had flickered away, but now he knows even the most enchanting things have to die before they can transform. 
He loves you.
He has loved you for 2 years and 363 days.
He will love you until the world goes up in flames. 
He will love you until the planet bleeds with the wounds of armageddon. 
"Does this mean we can still celebrate our 3-year anniversary?" He asks sheepishly, looking up at you through fluttering eyelashes. You perk up, visibly brightening. 
"You remembered!"
"I never forgot." he smiles, eyes shimmering with hope.
"I've been counting down the days," you grin.
"So have I," but he hasn't been counting down the days until you celebrate 3 beautiful years on this planet together. No, he's been counting down the days until his body slips into the grave, but as he presses his ear to your heart, it feels like the steady beats were a swelling symphony orchestrated just for him. He sighs contently, nuzzling deeper into your chest. The terrifying tick of the clock faded away, drowned out by the song of your soul whispering sweet promises into his ear. Sure, the fear still tickled the back of his brain, but instead of worrying that time was trickling away, he pulls you closer because with you, there was never a wasted moment. 
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©CookieCreates (posted: July, 9th 2024) All rights reserved. Do not translate, copy, or claim my works as yours! I only post on this platform so if any of my works are elsewhere, report and notify me immediately
~cookie🍪
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martinmuhl · 3 months
Text
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⋆✧˚ ༘ prove it (part 3)
pair: paige bueckers x reader
warnings: none!
summary: notorious player paige wants to take the star volleyball player out on a date
authors note: hi guys, sorry it’s been a min. i’ve been in a writing slump so this prob isn’t very good :( it’s def not my best, but i hope you enjoy! love yall sm
‧₊˚ ☁️⋅♡𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.
the next week was the busiest week you’d had in a while. the national college volleyball tournament was next week and your coach was not messing around. if you weren’t in class, you were in the gym preparing. it was hard to focus on anything else when you were being worked so hard, but that didn’t mean you weren’t thinking about paige and her next surprise. it was 9pm on monday night and you were in bed about to pass out when you heard a knock at the door, feeling some nostalgia to when kk had surprised you everyday the week prior. sighing deeply, you got out of bed and opened your apartment door. peering down at you was the blonde you were just thinking about.
“well hello there, sleepyhead.” she jokes, a low laugh slipping out. you hadn’t even stopped to look at yourself before opening the door. your hair was probably a disaster and you were barely wearing any clothes, expecting it to be a teammate at the door.
“oh my god paige, really? you couldn’t have texted me first before showing up here?” you reached up to feel your hair and just how bad it was probably sticking out everywhere.
“i don’t have your number actually so… but i just wanted to ask you if you were free anytime this week? i know this is probably a pretty busy week for you, but i just need like a few hours of your time if that’s okay?” she smiles at you and despite how busy you are, you decide that you could probably spare a few hours for her.
“i guess i could probably spare a few hours of my time,” you giggle. “how’s wednesday? i have class and practice, but im done around 5ish. that okay?” she nods with a big goofy grin on her face.
“ill pick you up at 6 then, ma.” she says, bouncing on the heels of her feet. you nod, and she looks like she wants to say or do something else.
“did you have anything else you wanted to say?” you ask and a sheepish smile appears on her face.
“i just like you a lot and i really want to touch you,” she says, her face instantly turning red. “oh god, not like that. i just mean that i really want to hug you or something and i don’t know if-“ you cut her off, chuckling at her rambling.
“paige.” is all you say.
“yeah?”
“you can hug me.” as soon as she hears that, her arms engulf you in a hug. she squeezes tight, like she doesn’t want to let go. after she let go, she looked like she was going to say goodbye, but you had other ideas.
“did you want to come in?” you couldn’t help yourself. you knew that you couldn’t fully trust her yet, but it was paige bueckers. she’s the most beautiful girl you had ever seen and was already proving to you that she was worthy a date. why not invite her in?
paige rocked back and forth, contemplating. “i really want to, i hope you know that… but i feel like if i did it would seem like im going back to my old ways and im not at all.” she chewed her lip, peering down at you.
you nodded and felt disappointed, but also a bit of relief. you wanted so bad to believe her and honestly, this was a huge step for you toward that. you weren’t looking to have sex with her tonight, but the fact that she didn’t even want to chance it made your heart swell. eventually, paige said goodbye and you fell asleep that night thinking of her.
wednesday rolled around and paige picked you up for your surprise. she ended up driving you to a local park to watch the sunset and have a picnic. you felt like it was a date, which is what she was supposed to be working toward, but you didn’t want to take any of her excitement away so you let it slide. she was so proud of herself for setting it up all by herself. it was a great night, paige was everything you thought she wasn’t. she was kind and always complimenting you, but also seemed so interested in you and learning all there was about you. you were hesitant at first, but eventually opened up and told her about your family and other personal things to which she did the same.
after the surprise, she drove you home and hugged you goodnight. you had also gotten her number, finally. you were over the moon. paige was making you the happiest you’d been in a while. the next two days passed and you had decided. you didn’t need to wait the whole month, right? she had already proved so much to you. she had changed and she wanted you. just as you pulled your phone out to text her to come over, you received a message from your teammate, allison. your heart sunk.
allison: hey girl, just wanted to let you know that the team is at the bar right now and so is the wbb team. paige has been hanging with a brunette i’ve never seen before all night and they look really comfy… just wanted to tell you just in case you didn’t know :/
you: oh wow.. thanks for letting me know alli <3
allison: you should get your ass down here and confront her!! no one plays you! want me to beat her ass?
you: no no, it’s okay i’m on my way. you’re right, no one plays me.
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vampykween · 11 months
Text
Second Chances (part 1)
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i wanted to write about singledad!ghost x teacher!reader (which is so self indulgent as im a teacher hehe) and thus this was born summary: little poppy is simon riley's entire world and you've just had yours turned completely upside down. despite everything, it seems like everything falls into place when you're with each other. this is going to be a little series - i already have a few drabbles written and have l more ideas up my sleeve, but feel free to let me know all of yall's ideas too!! dedicated to @suimon since you love my dad!ghost so much hehe mwah
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Simon is just short of pulling his hair out. He’s spent all morning wrestling with a five-year old who, last night was bouncing off the walls excited about her first day of school, but now is inconsolable and quite frankly working his last nerve.
“Poppy, love, please just get dressed. We don’t have all morning for you to mess about.”
Poppy shrugs her shoulders and blows a raspberry right in her father’s face. “Let me go, I’m not going to school,” the five-year old squirms in her father’s grasp, less than thrilled at the prospect of getting dressed for school.
Simon briefly considers whether he should invest any more energy into their morning battle or if he should just concede and let his daughter win this round. Despite her protests, he keeps his hold on Poppy and tries his best to calm her down enough to reason with her. Sometimes Simon couldn’t believe this was his life, he was tussling with his daughter about getting ready for school, when in a past life all he was ever worried about was backing his team throughout a mission. He used to be a trained killer now the only thing he’s an expert at is making silly voices for all the book characters at bedtime.
“You were so excited about school just last night, what happened lovie, what’s going on with you?”
Poppy just stares at him with her big doe eyes, the ones that look exactly like her mother’s, and makes Simon’s chest ache painfully. It’s moments like these that make him feel like the grief would never end.
After a drawn-out minute, she finally squeaks out, “What if I don’t like school? What if people are mean to me?” Simon’s heart breaks at his little girl’s admission, he, of course, worried about those things too; he wasn’t sure he even wanted to send her off for hours every day, but he also knew that Poppy could handle it.
Simon grasps both of her much smaller hands, “You’re the best girl I know, what’s not to love yeah? I’m sure you’ll make lots of friends, sweetheart.” Simon isn’t sure who he’s reassuring more at this point, but he’ll say anything to get them both through this day and all the ones that come.
Poppy sighs loudly and by something short of a miracle, she concedes with getting dressed; Simon let her pick out her own outfit, in hopes that it would rekindle her previous excitement. It helped, but only marginally.
Standing in the doorway of the classroom, is not the teacher Simon had been expecting. When he thought of teachers, he imagined either super strict, uptight older women or bright and bubbly young women fresh out of university. You were neither of those – you wore a bright smile that reached your eyes, and your voice had the most warm and comforting lilt to it. Contrastingly, you were dressed head to toe in an all-black outfit, but it didn’t make you look dark and dreary, no, on you it worked quite well. Poppy finally, but reluctantly revealed herself from behind her father’s legs, and stepped forward to greet her new teacher.
“Hi! What’s your name?” you were clearly not from anywhere near, and Poppy immediately comments on it.
“My name is Poppy, like the flower, and you talk very funny.”
Simon groaned, “Poppy, that’s not very polite, love.”
“No, no it’s alright. It’s not the first time I’ve heard that this morning,” you laugh breezily, not affronted by the little girl’s observation. The sound of your laugh is like a mirage in a desert, and Simon is taken aback at how much the sound affected him. You crouch down and introduce yourself to Poppy, then rise to greet Simon as well. You hold out your hand, clearly in an attempt to shake his, and he shakes his head to clear his stupor and takes your hand. Your hands are much smaller than his own, and much softer, not calloused from battlefields and the hardships of life.
You hope you’re coming off as a well put together adult, one who’s supposed to be in charge of people’s most precious gifts. Threatening to ruin your façade is the fact that you’re shaking hands with quite possibly the hottest man you’ve seen since you upturned your life and moved to London a few months ago. This is your student’s dad, jesus get a grip, you hastily remind yourself. You can’t help yourself though, and your eyes are roaming over his massive hands searching for a wedding band. You’re not sure whether it’s a good thing or not when you see there isn’t one. He’s hot, but he’s got a child, and you’ve just had your heart shattered into a million pieces this summer. The last thing you need is to be lusting after your student’s unreasonably hot father.
You’re not even sure you want to be here; nothing had gone the way you planned and now you’re a million miles away from your family – who had forewarned you that your ex maybe was not worth moving across the world for, but you were in love, you didn’t want to hear that.
Poppy, who seemingly gained some confidence, breezes past her father and finds her way easily into the classroom. You looked back up at her father, realizing you hadn’t caught his name – he tilts his head ever so slightly at you as if he’s trying to discreetly assess you and it makes your palms sweat.
“I didn’t catch your name, can’t call you Poppy’s dad all year now, can I?” you prod causally, laughing despite the stifling air that was forming between you two.
“You can call me Simon,” he replies elusively and suddenly you’re overcome with the feeling that there’s something mysterious about this man – and as attractive as he is, the revelation also makes you feel unnerved.
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taglist: @happy-mushrooms @lunamoonbby
banners from @reveriesources and @cafekitsune pic creds: @ave661
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miloformula123fan · 9 months
Note
Full fic??
I’ve read that Logan S. felt really lonely being the only American in F1. Like, he wasn’t completely accepted in the grid. Maybe he has an overprotective older sister who is a professional soccer player (like World Cup level good) who finally has time to attend his races. She dislikes most of the grid, except Alex and Oscar, for how they treated her brother. quick to defend Logan and even as far as annihilate them during the annual driver soccer match to prove a point. Im thinking G. Russel pairing due to Logan living in England. he wins her over by treating logan right, acknowledging he could have been welcoming, etc. Just a thought!
OKAY I HONESTLY LOVED THIS! IT WAS SO MUCH FUN TO WRITE (let me know if you want a part 2, because it is a bit of an interesting ending haha)
Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.
also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better
edit: i wrote part 2 - it is here
part 3 is here
George Russell x reader, logan sargeant x sister!reader
---
Y/N loves her brother, she really does. Yeah, she’s tried to get to a few of his F2 rounds, but with her soccer taking her around the world, she has had very little time. She has the entire month off though, so what better to do than visit her brother at his home grand prix. Miami is always a party, so maybe she could let loose for a bit, try and relax, and find a guy.
This is quickly vetoed when she finds Logan cooped up in his drivers room. While most people would think that he was excited for the race, most people weren’t Logan’s sister. She could tell he was thinking too hard about something, and it wasn’t good.
“Hey Logie Bear! Whatcha thinking about?” She tried to appear happy, but she could see that Logan’s smile did not reach his eyes
“Nothing, just excited for the race, the car is quick, just aiming for some points, hoping for a safety car. The garage is over there, sorry I have to warm up.” Y/N looked up as Benny entered the room and Logan stood up. She could tell how closed up he was, how he didn’t want to talk at all
“Okay, we’ll talk after the race Logan! Good luck, you'll smash it!” Y/N walked out of the drivers room towards the garage seeing the chaos of it.
Y/N watched as Logan apologised over again and again to his engineer for not making up any more places. She stood there listening to his engineer reassure her younger brother. She eventually decided that she couldn’t listen to it anymore and decided to wait in his garage room.
When he walked in, Y/N could tell he wasn’t sure whether to throw stuff or cry. 
“Hey, hey, come here! It’s okay, it’s okay!” She opened her arms and sat down as Logan fell down into them and hugged her baby brother, as he started talking the words just rushed out
“I just wanted to prove that I deserve to be here, feel like I’m a part of the paddock.” Logan hugged his sister back tightly, hesitating slightly.
“What do you mean? Of course you’re a part of the paddock, you’ve got your seat, y’know?” Y/N was confused as to what her brother meant, from what she had seen, he was welcomed warmly by everyone.
“Yeah but, I’m never invited to the grid parties, no one really ever talks to me, except Alex and Oscar, and Oscar is getting into the rest of the grid through Lando, and Alex is only really talking to me because I mean, he’s my teammate we have to be friends, and I just want everyone to like me… so I thought maybe if I got some points and good overtakes, then people would like me..”
“Oh, Logie… It’ll be okay. If they don’t like you then I think they’re just idiots, but they won’t. They’ll warm up to you, I promise.”
---
George watched as Y/N sprinted up and down. Okay the F1 team was never going to win, particularly when multiple women who were playing in the world cup were playing on the opposition team, but ‘Sargeant’  (who also had the same name as the rookie driver this year, who was sitting in the stands) was dominating, she had more goals then all of the f1 team, so of course the celebrity team won 4-1. She’d almost immediately jumped into the stands once the referee blew the whistle and started talking to Logan, maybe the kid got married young and just didn’t want anyone to realise. 
Although she looked quite similar to Logan, so maybe his sister instead. Either way, she did not seem to like them, she called them all dickheads and shoved them over a few times. George’s knees were sore. But she was still pretty. So he approached Logan and the girl.
“Hello! I’m George and…’
“I’m pretty sure my brother knows your name, Georgie! Why don’t you say hello to him?”
“Y/N-”
“No. Say hi to Logan, George.” She smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes, almost forced.
“Hey Logan! Looking forward to the grand prix this weekend?”
“Uhhhh… yeah. ” He turned back to Y/N “I’ve got some stuff to do, so you can make your way back. See ya!”
As soon as Logan was out of listening range, Y/N pulled George in and started whispering, “Listen, I don’t know what problem you have my brother, but you need to get over it ASAP, understood?”
“I.. don’t have a problem with your brother.”
“Well, then why is he telling me that there have been 2 people, Oscar and Alex, who have actually welcomed him to F1. Everyone else has snubbed him and he doesn’t understand why you don’t like him. He’s lonely. So fucking sort your shit out.”
George stood there, mouth gaping as she stormed off to grab her bag and then sprinted after Logan. He could almost hear the f1 team laughing at his failed attempt at flirting, but all he could think about ‘was what she said true?’’
---
Y/N was going to cry.
She could see Logan in the family and friends box, hands over his mouth, eyes glassy.
That corner kick should’ve gone in, she thought, we had so many chances and we still fucked it all. Couldn’t even give Megs a proper farewell.
She walks slowly over to her younger brother and let his arms wrap around her
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Dragged you halfway ‘round the world when you should’ve been training only to lose the first game.”
“Hey, hey, it’s okay, don’t worry about it. Go pack up, we can head home and spend some time in London relaxing. I’ve got next week off before I need to be back in the factory.”
Y/N was awoken by a knock on the front door. Hearing Logan snoring from his bedroom, she got up off the couch, rubbing her eyes and opened the door.
Of all the people she was expecting to see, George Russell would’ve been just about the last on her list “Uhh, hey?”
“Oh, morning! Is your brother up?”
Y/n paused for a moment to let George hear the snores coming from Logan’s bedroom. “Yeah, no, sorry. I can pass on a message?”
“Oh, No I was just going to offer if he was still up to go on a morning jog with him, but as he isn’t…”
“You been doing this often?”
“Almost every week we’ve been in town. I don’t think he understands what or why I’m doing this. But, he’s a good kid, opens up a bit when you talk to him. He likes you, respects you a lot for 2 siblings pursuing their sport across the globe.”
“I’ll make some breakfast and you can stay til Logan wakes up, okay? As a thanks for looking out for him. Hard for me to do from across the globe.” Y/N looked tense, with an almost forced smile. She looked awkward, before stepping back, holding the door open so George could come in.
---
“LOGAN SARGEANT!”
“Hello, dear sister, what do you want?”
“YOU GOT POINTS!”
“I think you must have watched a different grand prix, I got P12.”
“Hamilton and Leclerc got disqualified, something about wood, but you got points!”
“OH MY! AHHH! I had no idea, oh god!”
“YEAH! MY LITTLE BRO FINALLY GETTING F1 POINTS! WOOHOO! We must celebrate when we’re both in town!”
“AHH! Shit, wait I think people are coming in, give me a sec.
You’re on speaker dear sis, Alex, Oscar and George are here.”
“HELLO OSCAR! HI ALEX! HI GEORGE! DID SOMEONE BRING CHAMPAGNE???”
---
Y/N looks at the buzzing phone on her bedside table. Well clearly she had grabbed Logan’s phone before bed last night. She looked at the contact name
‘George - probably calling about something from the GDPA.’
She picked up.
“Before you start talking, I’m not Logan and I have not signed any NDAs related to his contract so, don’t talk to me.”
“Hi Y/N, do you know where Logan is?” George’s voice was way too cheery for however fucking early it is right now.
“Yeah he’s in his bedroom, he grabbed my phone and I grabbed his, why?” Y/N swung her legs out of the bed and stood up, still rubbing her eyes.
“Oh, can you come answer the door?”
“The door, why?” Y/N got up, and walked to her front door and opened the door to …nothing.
“George, are you pulling a prank on me? There’s nothing at the door.”
“You haven’t opened the door!”
“George… Logan and I are in Florida for Christmas. I’m guessing you’re in London.”
“Oh…yes. Bugger. I came to congratulate him on his contract renewal and so now I’ve got food and flowers and stuff and he’s not here!”
“If you go round the block to 20 XXX Close, there’s a single mom there, who will appreciate some Christmas cheer Georgie.”
“Oh, thank you. I’ll send it over.”
“Why were you congratulating Logan, George? I didn’t think you cared. Only Alex and Oscar have reached out so far.”
“I..I remember what you said at the soccer match, about Logan feeling ostracised by all of us. So I’ve been trying to make him feel welcomed… not just because you said that, and I like you, but also because I kinda realised we’d all be failing him as a grid, so i thought if I started it, maybe others would catch on. It didn’t work, but I think he feels more included.”
“That’s very nice of you Georgie. I’ll pass on your congrats. Now it’s like 7am here, and I didn’t need to be awake today, so i will be heading back to bed. Night Georgie boy.”
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likelyfox · 3 months
Text
I am (NOT) in love!
Yu Jimin x M!Reader
wc: 2.1k
summary: You werent really the person who could get a successful job, as you were struggling in College and graduation only did harm.
ao3
You applied to several jobs however not landing on any of them, you did want to give up but at the same time you really couldnt you had to get accepted somewhere and somehow.
After couple of weeks of waiting you decided to give up and try months later.
You decided to go out on a walk, even if it was quite early in the morning there were already lots of people. However someone caught your eye, at first you didnt recognize her but after couple cars drove away you recognized the girl Yu Jimin, or the leader of the K-Pop group aespa Karina.
There was no chance that you could get a picture with her, but maybe just maybe there was. However right as you crossed the street you realized she was gone, that was it your only chance to meet her was gone.
“Hey” Someone tapped your shoulder
“Hey-” You turned around to be met with her
“I saw how you looked at me! Do you want to get a picture?” Karina asked
“I uh- Yes!” You were shocked, and for good reason.
You thought that maybe she would just go to her manager, instead she decided to talk to you a bit.
“Where are you from?” Karina asked
“Seoul!” You answered
“Awesome!” Karina said “Do you have a job?”
“Uh no…why?” You asked back
“You could be a manager of a K-Pop group!” Karina answered
“I think i would be fine-” You said
“Im serious” Karina said “Here, call this number when you get home”
“But-” You said
“Hope to see you again!” Karina said before she ran off to what looked like the groups car.
You couldnt believe it, Karina THE Karina gave a phone number to you!? 
The moment you got back home, you called the number.
Feeling slight anxiety in you, afterall Karina gave you a number which she said you had to call. An idol of a K-Pop group.
“Hello?” A voice asked
“H-hello!” You said
“So you called?” The voice asked
“Yes…Karina?” You answered
“Hey” Karina siad
“Why did i have to call you?” You asked
“I just thought you were cute…i want to meet you again and know you better” Karina said
“Seriously?” You asked
“Yes.” Karina answered
“Oh my god!” You said
“Haha! you can come to the SM building at around 12pm tomorrow.” Karina said
“Yes alright!” You said
“Awesome! See you tomorrow!” Karina said before hanging up
That night you couldnt sleep, you felt a rush of excitement and for good reason. You have no idea what would happen however you were really excited.
You woke up the next day and went to the building. Reaching the building you took a deep breath before walking in.
“Hello!” A voice said
“Hello-” You turned around to be met with Karina
“You called?” Karina asked
“Yeah” You answered
“Good. Come with me.” Karina said before you followed her. Both of you entered an escalator and silence set in.
“Where are we going?” You asked
“Our practice room.” Karina answered
Oh. Thats not what you thought, maybe the call wasnt even a real one?
“Here we are!” Karina said
“Are you sure-” You said before she opened the door, you entered to room seeing no one, matter of fact it was dimly light.
“Am i allowed to be here?” You asked
“Yeah” Karina answered “I have a badge which you can use as if you were my manager”
“Oh” You said 
“How often are you free?” Karina asked
“All the time” You answered
“Good.” Karina said “Would you want to become a manager?”
“Huh?” You asked
“Would you like to become a manager!” Karina said
“No i heard…are you serious?” You asked
“Why wouldnt i?” Karina asked back “So…yes or-”
“Yes. I would love to!” You answered
“Good. We can go sign the papers then” Karina said before you followed her out of the practice room.
You were thinking about how you got here, how you got the job of being a manager of Karina. An idol you looked up to.
“This is insane” You said to yourself hoping she wouldnt hear it
“What is?” Karina asked
“That im your manager” You answered
“Really?” Karina asked
“Yes.” You answered
“Adorable” Karina said before hugging you
At the same time you were anxious, what if the members dont support you? What if other managers and staff dont support you?
“Where are you going?” Karina asked
“Home.” You answered
“Uh no…you will live with me and the members.” Karina said “Im not joking.”
“Right.” You said
“Have you met the members?” Karina asked
“No.” You answered “Well i did meet NingNing”
“Oh?” Karina said
“I was a former trainee here actually!” You said
“Oh so thats why you are familiar” Karina said “Wait…did you and Winter used to be close?”
“Yes” You answered
“Oh thats cool” Karina said “Alright lets go to our dorm”
The ride to the dorm wasnt long, but you did feel anxious as this was your first time meeting them.
Once you arrived you quickly followed Karina.
“Hey?” Karina asked
“Yeah?” You asked back
“They are really nice…dont be worried” Karina assured you
“I know” You said
“You give warm hugs” Karina said
“You too” You said
“But uh-” Karina said before opening the door
“Oh you-” Giselle said “You got a boyfriend!?”
“Manager.” Karina said
“You look attractive, Karina has taste” Giselle said
“Shut up!” Karina said
“Oh hey Y/n!” Winter said before hugging you
“Sup” You said “How did you meet him?” Winter asked
“On the street.” Karina answered
“Oh wow” NingNing said
“Yeah but…he looked cute so i wanted to know more about him” Karina said
“I wont be surprised if you start dating” Winter teased her
“We just met.” Karina said
“Who says you cant date him!” Giselle said
“Me?” Winter said
“Right” Karina said “I uh…lets go to my room!”
“Oooo!!” The girls teased you both as you followed Karina
“So this is my room” Karina said locking the door behind her
“I mean its nothing special but-” Karina said “Hey…you didnt feel awkward about all of that?”
“Sort of.” You said
“Im sorry” Karina said “I dont know why they did that”
“Its fine!” You said “Im used to these kind of teasing”
“You are?” Karina asked as she looked back up to you
“Yeah” You answered
“Oh so it wasnt that bad for you?” Karina asked
“Nope.” You said “Well i did feel awkward.”
“Seriously?!” Karina asked as she went closer to you before putting her hands on your shoulders. Knowing where this could go you wanted to still play with her a bit.
“Seriously.” You said, seconds later she leaned in you thought she would kiss you however she didnt.
“Lets take this slowly…” Karina whispered but loud enough for you to hear and then kissed your cheek.
“Karina-” You said before she closed the door
“Oh you are back!” Winter said as she saw Karina exit her room
“Well you look happier now” Giselle said
“Yes because hes so nice.” Karina said
“In what way?” Ning asked
“He takes care of others really well” Karina answered
“Great to hear” Giselle said
“How did you get SM to agree?” Winter asked
“I already told them that i found a new manager before i even broke the news to him.” Karina said
“Oh but what if he said no?” Winter asked
“Then nothing!” Karina said
“He seems cute and really likable” Giselle said “Im glad you chose him!”
“Oh thanks” You said as you entered the living room
“Oh god-” Giselle said
“I think that Y/n is very cute too! I hope we can make him feel happy and loved here” Winter said
“Thank you Minjeong!” You said
“M-minjeong?” Winter said blushing a bit
“Dont steal Karinas boyfriend…Minjeong!” Ning teased
“I am not stealing him.” Winter said
You didnt understand why and how the girls adored, however you dont want this to end.
The next couple of weeks were relatively calm, as you werent really home that often but when you were you felt like you were back home. As if being with aespa was your new home.
And it really was, the girls cared for you as much as you did for them.
“Karina?” Winter asked
“Yeah?” Karina asked back
“Whats the deal between you and Y/n?” Winter asked
“Nothing. Hes our manager” Karina said “Are you jealous?”
“Uh no im not” Winter said
“You want me to cuddle with you as i do- did.” Karina said
“You cuddle with him?” Winter asked “I knew it! There was no reason for you to have him to yourself!”
“Hes the manager and im the leader of our group its normal to be this close” Karina said
“You treat him like hes in our group!” Winter said
“Because he sort of is. He takes care of us, lives with us and travels everywhere with us” Karina said
“But-” Winter said
“Why are you fighting over me?” You asked entering the room
“We arent” Karina said
“I heard everything” You said “Its just…i love you guys but fighting just because i spend time with one member more?”
“Sorry” Winter broke her silence
“No its fine.” You said “If i spend more time with one member doesnt mean i dont i love the others!”
“So you do love me!” Karina said
“Yeah. You are literally my bias” You said
“Hey!” Winter said
“I love you too dont worry” You said
“Good” Winter said
You never understood why they fought over you, maybe it was just to test how you would respond or they did that because they genuinely had love for you.
“Y/n!” Giselle called you
“Yeah?” You asked
“Are you and Karina dating?” Giselle asked
“Nope” You answered “Even if i was dont you think i would spend time with her?”
“Yes, but maybe you are hiding it thats why” Giselle said
“I am not” You said
“You both would make a cute couple” Ning said breaking her silence
“Yeah” Giselle said
“We would?” You asked
“Does that surprise you?” Ning asked
“Yeah” You answered “Its just that i was a fan before i became your manager”
“Lucky fan” Giselle said “But hey who knows! maybe you will date her”
“Maybe” You said
Later that night you had lots of thoughts in your head not only about the girls schedule for the next month or so but also about the conversation you Giselle and Ning had.
“Everything alright?” Karina asked
“Yeah just a lot of thoughts” You said
“About what?” Karina asked
“You…your group.” You said
“Me?” Karina asked “Aw am i that annoying-”
“You arent annoying” You said
“Then why else am i on your mind” Karina said as she sat besides you
“You…uh” You tried to think of something to say, but it was too hard.
“Aw my baby cant think anymore?” Karina said
Oh? Thats new.
“Karina-” You said
“Dont act like you dont want to kiss me. I have seen how you look at me” Karina said “How you check me out.”
“I do yes but-” You said before Karina kissed you. The kiss quickly turned into a makeout which you loved.
At the same time you were nervous about someone walking in, but Karina wasnt. For her it made everything better, the chance of someone catching you both.
“Mmm” Karina moaned against your lips
The kiss ended by someone walking in
“Hey i-” Giselle. Of course it was her, she was the person who wanted you both to date the most.
“Go!” Karina said before pushing her out of the room
“Congrats-” Giselle said before Karina closed the door.
There was an awkward silence between the two of you.
“Hey look-” You said
“Shush” Karina put a finger on your lips “Baby.”
“Right” You said to yourself
“I think we should finally settle it” Karina said
“Settle what?” You asked
“I know its been only 5 months but i think we should date” Karina said
“Sure?” You said “I dont know how to feel about all of this”
“Yeah i know imagine dating an idol. Your bias but still…you are adorable, attractive and very good looking” Karina said
“Thanks” You said before hugging her
“Is it official?” Karina whispered but loud enough for you to hear
“It is.” You said before kissing her again. This time it didnt turn into a makeout instead it was a calm and soft kiss.
“Giselle probably told others.” You said
“Probably, but its official i dont care” Karina said
195 notes · View notes
soobibabe · 4 months
Note
beomgyu who's teaching you guitar, and you just wouldn't get it even after a few hours. so he leans in closer, yanks the guitar out of his way, and starts fingering you nonstop 😵‍💫..
I had been thinking abt this for a long time and now im waiting for a fic abt this😋
(Sorry if my grammar is bad, English isn't my first language)
pairings: choi beomgyu + reader wc: 1.3k genre ▸smut, fluff at the end kinda warnings: fingering, degradation if you squint, praise and terms such as "good girl" , "baby" etc. breast play (not too much), cum eating(?).
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“my fingers are numb!” 
you’re two hours into your lesson with Beomgyu, but you spent more time fussing than actually practicing. your fingers feel like they’re losing blood circulation. did he choose the hardest fucking song to start with?
“sweetheart this is only the beginning, now work on smoothing the flow of chords when you’re interchanging your ring and index finger. you’re playing the guitar not doing a test for carpel tunnel” You’re so over this already.
Youre currently situated atop his bed. The edge of it to be precise, your legs are crossed with the guitar on your thighs.“Can I have a break at least?” you whine, earning an eye roll from the man in front of you. 
Beomgyu unfolds his arms and emerges off the wall he was leaning against to step closer to you. “you’re not stopping until I tell you ‘you can stop’, y/n”.
you forfeit bickering with him any further, focusing your attention back on the instrument sitting in your lap. 
your dominant hand is wrapped around the neck of his guitar, while the other strums along the strings with your pick. 
you’re so focused on reading the notes, that you don’t notice Beomgyu’s change in demeanor when you finally get back to playing
“Wow, y/n, look at you getting the hang of i-” his excitement is short-lived when you demolish his ear with a ridiculously loud wrong note. “You’re hopeless.” he sighs.
“My hand” you scrunch your face in pain. “Cramp, ouch”.
“Okay yeah that's understandable,” he approaches you and examines your position. “Get up, I should’ve thought about this earlier”. You’re reminded of how tall he actually is when he gets closer.
You don’t hesitate to do as he says, not thinking much of it. 
He takes his place behind you, dropping himself further up onto the spot you were previously on. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t flabbergasted by his sudden action. 
Still behind you, he man-spreads. Your eyes widen when you feel his hand reach up and rest on your hip. “Sit.” his voice is low and sultry.
You slowly settle onto the mattress between his legs. “Perfect,” he speaks softly. 
His chest is pressed against your back, following your hand to meet the strings. “You hold the chords, i’ll strum. Can you do that for me?” his face is perched at your shoulder, eyes piercing onto your cheek awaiting your response. 
“Mhm,” you murmur, making him smirk.
Your fingers dance along the lines, not too far away from his. As time goes by, the room only seems to heat up more. He’s good with his hands. Perhaps its the lack of space between your bodies, but you grow more flustered by the second, causing you to mess up more times than you’d like to admit.
“You really are something else,” he breathes out. You can tell he’s frustrated by your – many – futile attempts at following instructions. “What’s on your mind that important to have you messing up this badly?” “It’s nothing, gyu” You look down to where his free hand, which had made its way to your thigh without you noticing, lied. 
“Should I help you clear your head?” He swiftly lifts the guitar out of your lap and rests it somewhere on the floor beside him. You’re unsure of what he means. “Like what?”
“Do you trust me, y/n?” You turn to face him, eyes boring into his. The eye contact causes you to stiffen in his hold. You nod to answer his very – obvious question. 
His hand slides down to the side of your thigh, pulling your legs apart. “Keep these open for me, yeah?” You inhale a sharp breath at his words. You didn't realize how worked up you’d gotten from his touches. 
“So pretty like this. Is this what you wanted all this time baby?” he whispers into your neck, still caressing your lower body. Your head falls back when he presses kisses to your supple skin. “Want you, gyu” you whimper. Thats all the confirmation he needed to proceed with what he wanted to do you. His fingers make their want to your core, rubbing figure eights on your clothes cunt underneath your skirt. “Dirty girl, walking into my room with a mini skirt for her guitar lesson. Like youre begging me to fuck you” You grind yourself further into his touch at his words. 
He lets out a low chuckle at your neediness. “M’gonna make you feel so good”
“We can stop whenever you want to, just tell me, understood?” he inquires, and your heart flutters at how different his tone is from his last few statements. “Mkay” you mutter. He pulls your panties to the side, slipping his middle and ring finger to your centre, collecting your slick, and dragging it back up to your clit. 
“So wet for me already and i haven’t even done anything yet.” He smirks, ego-boosted from how soaked you were. 
Without warning, he shoves a finger into your heat, stroking in and out of you at a slow, yet rough pace. His other hand makes its way up to your torso, sliding under your skirt and cupping your boob in his palm.
“Beomgyu– fuck, feels s-so good” you whine, already losing yourself in the pleasure he’s providing. 
“I know baby, i know” he adds, thrusting another finger into your sopping cunt. “Show me how you fuck yourself, play with your clit for me” is the last thing he says before sucking at your neck, surely leaving bruises. 
You oblige to his wishes, rubbing feathery circles on your clit. His hand on your chest moves to pinch your nipple, rolling the bud around in circles. 
The stimulation from all of it at once causes a coil to form in your lower region. You don’t think you’ve ever felt pleasure this intense. “Think you can handle another finger?” he groans.
“Yes, please” you manage to vocalise. “You’re so good for me, y/n” he announces before absolutely demolishing your pussy with the abrupt change of pace when there’s a third finger in you. “Good girl” he purs into your nape. 
His fingers ram in and out of you hitting your g-spot with every stroke, reeling you closer to your orgasm. “Fuck, baby your clenching so hard on me. Imagine how heavenly this would feel when youre wrapped around my cock”. 
“Be an angel and cum for me, pretty” You’re in nirvana when his fingers curl inside of you. “Cumming – fuck, please” you dont even know what youre pleading for, too fucked out to care. 
You finish all over his fingers. He continues his movement to let you ride out your orgasm. 
After a few minutes, he pulls his fingers out and they glisten with your slick. His eyes beam at the sight. He thinks its the prettiest his hand has ever looked. He draws it to your lips, “open” he utters before pushing his coated fingers into your mouth.
“Tastes good?” he asks, and you nod. “My turn.” he flips you around so that your back is pressed on the bed now, and kisses you. “So fucking sweet, might get addicted y/n, shit” he giggles at the end of his sentence. "I underestimated how good you are with your fingers." you state breathlessly, causing you to laugh in unison.
He drops beside you, holding your hand and showering it with kisses. You clear your throat, elevating your head to look over at him, and he smiles endearingly at the sight of you. “Class again tomorrow? Same time?” and his eyes widen at your unexpected suggestion. 
“Yes, please, yes. Now lets go shower then get tteokbokki, i’m starving.” he gets up, and pulls you gently with him, leading you out of the room to the bathroom.
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A/N: not my best work, but i tried
ps: your english is amazing, dont worry about that here haha this is a safe space blog.
193 notes · View notes
stayxlix · 11 months
Note
Ok ok so feel free to bend and change this request to your liking. I been asking some of my favorite writers to try this request to see what they can come up with and I’m excited to see what you can do with this.
I was wondering if I can request a Felix story. Where y/n is dating hyunjin felix best friend and Felix at the beginning feels really guilty for liking her so much and always thinking about her. And one time when hyunjin leaves the reader and Felix alone, Felix snaps and kisses her which kinda freaks her out so he has no choice but to kidnap her because of his own jealousy and want. It’s a yandere type of story. If you don’t feel comfortable writing something that I request you can totally bend the story to your liking to feel more comfortable. Thank you ❤️
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a/n: hiii<33 here it is FINALLY!!! i have to admit a yandere concept is something i had never thought about writing myself but im so happy you requested this type of concept because stepping out of my comfort zone is something i really enjoy, and i did take your input to shape the story in a way that felt comfortable for me.<3 im so thankful that you chose to trust me with your request, and that you consider me one of your favorite writers.🤗💕i really hope it lives up to expectations.🤭 (also i apologize in advance for the abrupt ending, that is the part i struggled with most so please forgive me for the massive cliffhanger🥹).
wc: 3.8k
pairing: yandere!felix x reader (f), hyunjin x reader (f)
warnings: yandere themes, obsessive behavior, stalking, manipulation, male masturbation, 18+ **minors do not interact**, please lmk if i missed any!!
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The moment you stepped into Felix's life, it was as if a match had been struck in a dry forest, setting off a wildfire of emotions. From the very first time he’d laid eyes on you, Felix felt the heat of that blaze ripping through his soul. And if only you had taken the time to look—really look—into those deceptively innocent brown eyes, you might just have been able to see the flames raging behind them before it was too late.
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Felix was a good friend. A loyal friend.
As a result of his tendency to put his friends first, he often found himself dragged into situations he had no desire to be a part of.
And tonight was no exception.
Tucked away in a corner underneath the dim, multi-colored lights of a crowded party, Felix stood nursing a half-empty cup of stale beer that had long lost its appeal. Boredom gnawed at him, urging him to leave, yet he lingered. His eyes darted to the entrance every so often with the desperate hope that Hyunjin—the sole reason he had even chosen to attend the party at all—would be next to walk through.
But as the minutes dragged on without any sign of his best friend, Felix's frustration grew. The obnoxious music was far too loud, the alcohol not nearly strong enough to dull the disappointment of the evening, so Felix huffed out a sigh as he reached for his phone. Bypassing his earlier unanswered messages to Hyunjin, he typed out one final message to let his best friend know that he was calling it a night and would meet him back at their shared apartment.
After pressing send and shoving his phone back into his pocket, Felix pushed off the wall. Tossing the cup into the nearest trash, he turned toward the exit. But before he could take a single step further, before his foot had even hit the ground, he was gripped by a sudden shift in the atmosphere—a change that swept through the room. Through Felix.
The door swung open and in the split second that followed, the party around him was dulled into nothing but a distant hum. To say that Felix was captivated by the figure that walked through the door would have been an incredible understatement.
Unable to look away, a shallow breath caught in his throat as his gaze traced the contours of the stranger’s body— of your body—the way the dress clung to your figure underneath the soft tangerine glow of the flickering party lights. The way long slits in the black material revealed teasing glimpses of your silhouette in the most enticing way.
You stepped further into the room, and it was almost as if an unseen force had guided your focus toward Felix, too. Because as your eyes swept over the chaos of the party, they effortlessly bypassed the rest of the crowd and landed directly on his.
A shy smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you caught the intensity of his stare, yet the glint in your eyes hinted at something far less innocent. And it was right then and there that Felix decided that he had to know you, to feel you—taste you. In every possible way.
Driven by some unexplainable primal desire, his feet began to move of their own accord. He shouldered through the crowd, anticipation electrifying the air around him as he took a step closer to you. One step closer, and then another and—
Then Hyunjin walked in behind you. 
In such a cruel twist of fate, Hyunjin followed you through that door. And with the confidence that only Hyunjin could exude, his arm casually slipped around your shoulders, claiming you as his own. 
Felix's stride faltered as he came to a sudden stop. His heart plummeted, a heavy weight settling in its place as he watched you turn to Hyunjin. Your smile grew, blossoming into a radiant expression that drove a dagger straight through his chest.
Laughter cut through the air like shards of glass as he registered the uncomfortable press of sweaty bodies that danced too close. The rhythm of the music throbbed louder than ever in his temples, its bass pounding a relentless echo in his chest that only amplified the emptiness he felt as he watched from across the crowd as Hyunjin leaned in to whisper something to your ear. Something meant for only you to hear.
You turned your head and planted a brief, affectionate kiss on Hyunjin's lips in response, and the single dagger in Felix's heart was replaced by a thousand.
When Hyunjin glanced up from the kiss, his eyes immediately found Felix lingering in the crowd. Warmth spread across his face as the familiar smile he reserved for his best friend lit up the room.
Felix lifted his hand in a single wave—an attempt to appear casual and completely unaffected by the way your fingers seamlessly intertwined with Hyunjin's as the older boy began to lead you over.
The space between you was reduced to less than a foot—thanks to the pressing crowd—and in that close proximity, Felix found himself engulfed by the subtle scent of your perfume. Its sweetness was reminiscent of a warm summer evening, enticing his senses just enough to leave him wanting more.
After apologizing for his dead phone battery, Hyunjin strained to introduce you over the music. Every syllable of your name echoed through Felix’s mind, and as Hyunjin went on to recount the story of how the two of you had met, his voice became nothing more than a distant murmur. Quite frankly, Felix didn’t really care how Hyunjin had been fortunate enough to know you first. So he tuned out his best friend and dedicated the entirety of his focus to stealing glances in your direction, struggling to keep his gaze from lingering too long. And Felix decided that not only were you stunning, but your aura, too, was nothing short of magnetic. Confidence radiated from you in a way that was just as intoxicating as the sweetness of your fragrance. Your eyes, however, refused to leave Hyunjin. And Felix couldn't help but wonder what he would have to do to capture your attention like that.
But Felix was a good friend.
So like any good friend would, he pushed away the thought. He clenched his fist and drew in a steadying breath. With significant effort, he plastered a smile across his face—one that didn't quite reach his eyes—and turned to his best friend. "I was actually on my way out," he said. "Not feeling well, sorry mate.”
Hyunjin frowned at the interruption. His eyes glazed over with worry as he studied Felix’s face before reaching over to offer him a reassuring pat on the back. "Sure, man,” he said. “Take care. See you back home.” And Felix didn’t need to wonder why Hyunjin didn’t push him any further to stay. If he were in Hyunjin’s shoes, he would’ve don’t the very same thing—if only for the opportunity to have you all to himself.
Felix almost regretted his decision to leave when you stepped forward and met his eyes for the second time that night, your delicate features softening in a way that made his knees weak.
"Nice meeting you, Felix.”
Fuck.
The way your voice wrapped around his name, the way it rolled off your tongue had his cock straining in his already too-tight pants.
“Hope you feel better,” you added, with a smile so saccharine it had Felix feeling far more intoxicated than any amount of alcohol ever could.
Somehow, he managed a weak nod in your direction before dropping his gaze and hurriedly making his way to the door. His heart hammered in his chest like a desperate plea, urging him to stay and grasp at the fragile thread of hope he’d felt when he first laid eyes on you.
But Felix was a good friend.
And so he fought the urge to look back as he stepped outside. The night air wrapped around him, cool against his skin, but the fire inside him burned brighter than ever as you stoked the flames in his mind.
Upon returning to their shared apartment, Felix found no respite in the solitude of his room. He tossed and turned in the darkness, putting every ounce of effort he had into forcing thoughts of you from his mind.
The rational part of him recognized the boundaries, the loyalty owed to Hyunjin..And he tried—he really did. Even as his hand crept down to palm the growing bulge in his boxers, he knew it was wrong. But his fingers betrayed the internal conflict, slipping beneath his waistband to wrap around the base of his pulsing cock. His eyes screwed shut as he tugged slowly, picturing how your lips would look wrapped around it—how your mouth would feel, how your eyes would look shimmering with tears when you choked on it. He edged himself, because Felix liked to mix pleasure with pain. And just as he was finally about to grant himself the release he so desperately craved, Felix was yanked back to reality by the soft thud of the front door closing.
Hushed whispers began to fill the silent space on the other side of his bedroom door. Felix immediately recognized his best friend’s voice, accompanied by—
Yours.
Felix stilled with his hand still wrapped around his cock. He listened to the shuffling of footsteps, hushed laughter, and then, the decisive click of Hyunjin's bedroom door closing—and locking.
His thoughts immediately went to the possibilities playing out on the other side of the shared wall. And it didn’t take long before sounds of pleasure filled the air, growing into filthy sounds of skin slapping on skin. Felix couldn't believe his ears as the sweetest moans he’d ever heard began to seep through the cracks in the wall. Moans coming from your mouth as you were getting fucked by his best friend. Your voice rose, spewing Hyunjin’s name like some prayer, and Felix was certain he had never been this hard in his entire fucking life. Panting, his eyes screwed shut and suddenly he was pumping his cock again two—three more times until he heard you shout, “F-fuck Hyunjin I’m cumming!” and Felix came with you. The hardest he ever had, thick ropes of white shooting across his abdomen. 
After he’d finished and was thoroughly disgusted with himself, Felix lie there hoping that he wouldn’t have to interact with you in the morning. That you would be gone before the sun rose—following the pattern of those before you who had occupied Hyunjin's world for a single night. Although Felix was positive he would never find anyone quite like you, he could get over you—he would force himself to get over you, because of the unwavering loyalty he held for his best friend who had been by his side for as long as he could remember. 
Felix didn't even know you. And so, it should be easy enough to forget you, he thought.
Straightforward.
Already done.
Except for the fact that it wasn’t. Because as the weeks unfolded, it became painfully clear that your presence in Hyunjin's life—and thus, in Felix's life—would become far more profound than any fleeting one night stand. 
In the beginning, Felix had done a decent job at maintaining his distance. But the more time he spent around you, the harder it became to contain whatever it was that was burning inside of him. And it certainly didn’t help that Hyunjin insisted on weaving you into their lives. Inviting you to their late-night movie marathons, welcoming you to their favorite hangout spots, ensuring that you were always included in their plans. Felix found himself torn between the agony of watching you grow closer to his best friend and the sheer ecstasy of having you near.
Naturally, Hyunjin remained blissfully unaware of the effect you had on Felix, too wrapped up in you himself. But Felix was a good friend, determined to ensure that his commitment to his friendship would prevail. And he couldn’t deny the happiness you brought into his best friend's life. He had never seen Hyunjin so content—his expressions more animated, his laughter more genuine, his smiles more frequent than ever before. So Felix gritted his teeth and buried his attraction beneath layers of forced indifference. He put on thoughtful expressions when you spoke, despite the fact that the only thing he could think about was slipping his aching length between your legs. He smiled at you, and pretended like his cock wasn’t raw from how he abused it every night while scrolling through candid pictures of you he'd snapped without your permission. He went out of his way to make you feel comfortable, when all he wanted was for someone to make you cry so that he could be the one to wipe your tears.
Like a seasoned performer, as the months slipped by Felix became adept at masking the flames of longing and desire that raged beneath the surface. He became good at it..Until late one afternoon, in the quiet expanse of the library’s upper floor, when Felix came across you as he was heading home for the day. Your nose was buried in a heavy book, brow furrowed in concentration. And as Felix stood there, captivated by the sight of the setting sun's golden rays delicately brushing across your features, he etched the moment into the corridors of his memory, preserving it for...later reflection. You lifted your head, meeting his eyes like you had the very first night you'd met, and suddenly Felix wasn't sure how much longer he would be able to keep up the act. There was a brief pause from both of you—a silent acknowledgment of Hyunjin’s absence—before you graced Felix with a small wave.
Praying that his eagerness remained hidden, Felix made his way toward you. "Need some help?" he asked, his deep voice carrying a gentle undertone that eased some of the tension in your shoulders. You had always been comfortable with Felix, and he had always known it.
You sighed with exasperation, and it took everything for Felix not to let his gaze linger on your lips—soft and inviting, and a little swollen, as if you had been biting them in contemplation. “I’ve been at this for hours and normally Hyunjin helps me with this stuff, but he's been swamped with rehearsals lately,” you said.
Felix, suppressing the swirl of emotions triggered by the novelty of being alone with you, mustered a warm smile with sincerity that he made sure was reflected his eyes. "Is there anything I can help with?"
After the study session, Felix insisted that he walk you home—it was late, dark, and he genuinely cared about your safety amidst the unpredictable nighttime campus atmosphere. After all, what kind of friend would he be to Hyunjin if he let something happen to you? The conversation between you flowed effortlessly as it always did, and when you reached your doorstep you turned to him with a grateful smile, your eyes reflecting the trust that had blossomed between you over time. "Thank you, Lixie,” you said. The affection in your tone resonated like a soothing melody, and Felix couldn't help but revel in the nickname he had grown so fond of. "I really appreciate your help tonight," you added.
Felix returned your smile. "Anytime," he replied, "I'm just a text away if you need anything. Have a good night."
In the days that followed your meeting in the library, a seemingly natural rhythm developed between you and Felix. After discreetly familiarizing himself with your schedule and study habits, Felix began to strategically position himself in the library. He made sure to be there during those moments when you studied while patiently waiting for Hyunjin to conclude his dance practice.
Felix spent those precious hours focused entirely on you. He marveled at the way your eyes lit up with understanding, the soft sighs of relief when a difficult concept finally clicked. And he couldn't help but wonder whether your conversations held the same weight for you as they did for him. He wondered if you shared the details of your time spent together with Hyunjin. Or if perhaps, like Felix, you wanted to keep those shared moments a secret. 
A substantial pang of guilt gripped Felix's chest whenever he thought about it..But Hyunjin never mentioned anything—the routine of their friendship continued without interruption—and with time, the guilt dwindled. Fading into insignificance until it was hardly there at all.
Before he knew it, every innocent interaction between the two of you had become a significant event in his mind. Every stolen moment with you fueled his desire, long after Felix stopped trying to convince himself that what he felt was wrong. A friendly hug became an embrace laden with unspoken emotions. A playful nudge became a secret message, a whispered promise of something more. He couldn't see the truth anymore—couldn't separate reality from the distorted perceptions in his mind. He would lose himself to fantasies where he'd confess his love and you would respond by affirming that you felt the same. And Hyunjin would support the two of you—understanding and encouraging the connection between you and Felix—because Hyunjin was a good friend too.
Unfortunately, you were so madly in love with Hyunjin that you hadn’t noticed how the behavior of his roommate was a little..off. 
That particular evening, Hyunjin hadn’t planned on running late when he told you meet him at their apartment for your anniversary. When you texted him to let him know that you were there, he’d responded with a simple message:
Practice went late again I'm sorry, baby. Lix is there, he'll let you in. Call you when I'm outside, I'm taking you to dinner. Love u.
Your eyes, fixed on your phone screen, met Felix’s only briefly when he opened the door. As you stepped past him your thoughts remained focused solely on Hyunjin and how excited you were to see him. To be in his arms, to kiss him and exchange the details of your day. “Thanks, Lixie," you said, voice trailing as you made your way toward Hyunjin's room.
But you paused in front of Felix's room on the way, curiosity piqued by the soft lavender glow escaping from the cracked door. Drawn in by your favorite color, you ventured further inside, tossing your phone and purse onto the bed as you had done numerous times before. You found Felix's new computer setup, adorned with the vibrant purple lights that cast a mesmerizing aura throughout the room. The hum of the powerful machine filled the air, accompanied by a song from your favorite band. Your ears caught the familiar melody, though you didn't fully process the significance of it. You hummed casually, not realizing that Felix had intentionally picked the track just for you. The entire setup spoke volumes about Felix's passion for technology and his very, very meticulous attention to detail. 
Your fingers traced the sleek edges of the keyboard, and Felix couldn’t help but notice the way your skirt rode up when you bent over to get a closer look. He ran his tongue along his bottom lip as his eyes devoured the curve of your ass. “Check out the cable management at the back. Its nerdy, but I've spent quite some time making sure its all organized,” he said, knowing damn well that you would need to bend over further to see it. Which is exactly what you did, allowing Felix catch a full glimpse of the red lacy panties you had on underneath your skirt.
Fuck.
His favorite color. Had you worn them for him? Did Hyunjin even know you were coming over tonight?
Every question he’d ever had about your intentions swirled in his mind until Felix knew that he couldn't let uncertainty linger any longer.
When you stood and turned around, his lips were on yours.
Cherry flavored lip gloss, just like the one he had swiped from your purse last week in the library. For a split second, your lips pressed ever so slightly harder against his before you pulled back, covering your mouth with a hand. Your eyes went wide with shock. "Lixie...We’re friends..” you whispered. “We’re friends”, you repeated, a little firmer this time. 
Abruptly, your eyes darted to your illuminated phone screen on the bed. Following your gaze, Felix observed the caller ID, and he had never felt more like a fool. The stark reality hit him with unforgiving force as he witnessed the love mirrored in your eyes when you stared down at the glowing image of Hyunjin. He saw the depth of your very real feelings for his best friend, and how he had misinterpreted everything.
But Felix was so far gone that when you reached for your phone, his hands moved of their own accord, pushing it off the bed and sending it clattering to the floor. “Felix..” you whispered. But another impulse had him kicking your phone underneath the door—the door you hadn't realized he had closed behind you when you’d entered the room.
“Don't answer that,” he muttered, his own eyes wide with desperation. “Just...Just listen, please just let me explain," he begged, shifting in front of the closed door and reaching behind to lock it.
The shock in your expression mirrored the terror of a creature caught in the midst of an uncontrollable forest fire. And Felix felt creeping panic begin to take hold within him because this isn't how it was supposed to happen. You weren't supposed to be looking at him like that. Desperation clawed at his throat, his heart pounded in his chest, "I can explain," he pleaded. The taste of your lips lingered on his, a bittersweet reminder of his impulsive action. He observed the subtle tremor in your hands, a sign of your unease. He felt the hurt in your eyes—a hurt he had caused. And he knew that he had to fix this.
He just needed more time.
“Felix, what are you doing?" you whispered as he took a step toward you. Your eyes darted toward the door, his fingers brushed the fabric of your sleeve, and the raging inferno within Felix exploded. The crackling heat seared through his veins and—
The distant click of the front door closing echoed from the hallway.
And the realization hit Felix like a sudden downpour—What kind of friend would he be if he let Hyunjin find out what he’d done?
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ghoulsbounty · 4 months
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OMG IM SO EXCITED TO FIND SOMEONE WHO’LL WRITE BOYD CROWDER.
Can I request some fluff about going to sleep with Boyd (like actually sleeping lol), like him and the reader have a fun and flirty relationship and she knows about his criminal enterprises (S4 vibes with the pocket watch UGH). Maybe he comes home late or something and is just all over the reader but not in a sexual way, just like a missing and wanting to be close to her way.
Out Of Time
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Boyd Crowder x GN!Reader
Warnings: slight spoilers for season 4, a little angst if you squint but just pure comfort and fluff (Boyd is in love)
Word Count: 2K
A/N: Anon, thank you for my first Boyd request and simultaneously igniting a burning passion within me to write more for this man. I kept the reader GN because there wasn't really any need for gender descriptors, and yes I did make that gif just for this fic 🫡 I’d love to know what you all think to this, and feel free to send me more requests 💌
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Boyd sat silently on the edge of the bed, his gaze lingering on your tranquil, sleeping form. The mattress creaked softly under his weight, causing your steady breathing to hitch momentarily before settling back into a gentle rhythm. He brushed his fingers across your cheek, a surge of longing filling his heart. He had missed you. Those brief moments in the mornings, stolen before you left for work or he had to attend to his business, were never enough. Yet, he cherished every fleeting second, treasuring these quiet moments when he could simply watch over you.
He knew you held no resentment towards him, not even when he returned home later than promised, body weary and mind burdened by his actions, like tonight, and countless other nights. He understood that you wouldn't pry, wouldn't demand every detail of his whereabouts, because that wasn't your way, and for that, he was deeply grateful. It meant you could stay just a little bit safer. You never asked for more than he could offer, only requesting that he come back to you when he could, to reassure you of his presence, to let you know he was still breathing.
Of course, he would. He'd move heaven and earth, and blow the top off that damn mountain just to fulfil his promise to you. No matter the challenges, he would find his way back to you, and you'd greet him with open arms, washing away his sins and soothing his wounds with tender kisses. You'd offer him everything a man like him could ever desire, and he knew deep down he never deserved it.
He didn't allow himself to linger on the thought of not being worthy of you. You'd never insinuated it, not even during the fiercest arguments. You never stooped to using his vulnerabilities against him. It was evident to all that Boyd's Achilles' heel was you, yet you always made him feel invincible, as though he could stand against any adversary in Harlan County. And there were many, especially with the Oxy trade dwindling with the arrival of the new preacher and the drastic measures Boyd had to employ to protect not just his business, but your shared future together.
You often credited Boyd with rescuing you from a life confined to cleaning tables in seedy bars, but the truth was far deeper: you had saved him. Boyd harboured no illusions about his criminal past; he knew the trajectory it set for his future. Yet, it was you who prevented him from plunging too deeply into the shadows of his upbringing. The thought of returning home to you, regardless of the hour, was the sole beacon that guided him through the gruelling days of battling for control over Harlan County. He fought not just for the people or for himself, but for you, and for the possibility of a family you might one day bless him with —that was what made every struggle worthwhile.
You stirred beneath his touch, your lashes fluttering as your eyes slowly opened, bleary and seeking. A smile graced your lips as you spotted him, reaching out to rest your hand on his thigh, as if confirming he was really there.
"Was wondering when I'd see you," you murmured, your voice husky with sleep. Leaning in, he pressed a tender kiss to the tip of your nose.
"Time ran away from me," he confessed, his gaze soft as he regarded you. "I'm sorry, darlin'."
You studied him for a moment, the urge to inquire further tugging at your thoughts before you decided to let it go. "Time can be a tricky thing."
Allowing him to guide you up, you melted into his embrace as he held you close. His gentle fingers traced soothing patterns on your back, smoothing the fabric of his shirt that you wore to bed each night under his touch.
"I left dinner for you in the fridge," you reminded him, pulling back slightly to meet his eyes. "I'll join you."
He shook his head, drawing you back into his arms. "Not hungry," he murmured, planting a soft kiss on your neck. "Didn't mean to wake you."
"Well, you failed miserably," you teased, a playful chuckle escaping your lips as he shook you in his hold around your waist. You could feel his smile against your skin. "How could I sleep with you hovering over me like a ghost?"
He chuckled, releasing you and gently nudging your shoulder. You settled back against the pillows, observing him as he rose from the bed.
"You'd scold me if I didn't kiss you goodnight," he remarked, a fond smile on his lips as he removed his pocket watch and set it on the bedside table. He held your gaze as he began to unbutton his waistcoat. "You ask every morning."
You hummed in agreement, running your thumb over the smooth surface of the brass watch. In the early days, you had made it a habit to stay awake during Boyd's late nights, eager to be alert in case his dealings took a dangerous turn and he needed to be patched up. It had occurred a few times, though not recently. Boyd Crowder was the sharpest mind in Harlan—few managed to outsmart him.
Your new job had demanded more from you, and though you had offered to resign, Boyd had insisted that one of you must earn through legitimate means. He had encouraged you to attend training school, funded the evening studies through unconventional channels and sang about how this new role was going to be a step in cementing the future you'd both dreamed of. Nevertheless, it had taken a toll on you, and you found yourself less vigilant than you were before, despite the anxiety that had kept you alert during those initial months, worrying about his safety. 
He didn't mind, of course. He reassured you that he was simply grateful to return home to you, for the comfort and warmth you provided him, and for the graciousness with which you welcomed his associates, despite your reluctance for your home to serve as a meeting place during desperate times. He never made you feel inadequate, even when he was out risking his life to carve out a brighter future for both of you.
You had both settled into a familiar routine, one that left you both yearning for more but ultimately grateful when the day ended and you found solace in each other's embrace.
As the covers shifted, a chill swept over you, but Boyd swiftly slid beneath them, now dressed only in his underwear, and nestled closer to you. He gently retrieved the pocket watch from your hand, leaning over to place it back on the table, before wrapping his arm around your waist. You lay on your back, gazing up at the ceiling, your fingers tangling in his thick hair as he nestled against your chest, finding comfort in your embrace.
A myriad of thoughts raced through your mind, a multitude of questions that remained unspoken as you focused on the steady rhythm of your shared breaths. Sometimes, you felt the urge to uncover everything, to strip away all secrecy and confront the raw reality of what Boyd endured each day. Yet, you quickly reminded yourself—that wasn't your place. Your role was to support him while maintaining a certain level of ignorance. It was crucial, Boyd had insisted, in case you were ever questioned about him. Which you were, often, if not by nosy neighbours from the holler then by your lawman colleagues. You had been prepared for every instance though, it was Boyd who had thrown you into the belly of the beast after all. 
You loved Boyd deeply, trusting him with your life because you understood it was the thing he valued most. If he required you to play a part, then that's what you would do. You'd remain silent, tend to his wounds, and hold him close, serving as the anchor he needed to prevent him from drifting too far out to sea.
His lips traced a tantalizing path over your collar bone, up your neck, and across your chin until they met yours in a soft, lingering kiss. A contented sigh escaped you as you melted into him, his hand exploring the contours of your body, caressing your side, gliding over your stomach, and tracing down your thigh. He grasped, stroked, and savoured every inch of you, his tongue intertwining with yours in a passionate dance.
Your hand slipped from his hair, instead cupping one cheek as the other tenderly stroked his jaw, rough with the stubble that grazed your thumb. He moaned against your lips, a sound laden with desire and need, but reluctantly pulled away, pressing one final kiss against the corner of your mouth before meeting your gaze with weary eyes.
"How long do I have you for?" he inquired, his voice heavy with longing, and you glanced over to the clock beside the bed. The red digits stared back at you, marking the finite moments of your togetherness as you let out a resigned sigh.
"Four hours," you replied, meeting his gaze once more. He nodded, a solemn smile touching his lips as he sank back onto the mattress. Extending his arm, he invited you to snuggle against his chest, and you accepted, finding solace in the warmth.
"What if you didn't go?" he murmured, his voice tinged with a hint of uncertainty, his fingers tracing soothing circles on the top of your arm. You chuckled softly, tightening your embrace around him as the notion settled into your mind.
"I'm not sure the Harlan County Sheriff's Department would appreciate their employees playing hooky," you replied with a teasing grin. "Even if it's just a lowly trainee like me."
"Oh, I'm sure Mr. Parlow could manage without you for one day," he replied with a playful smile, then his expression turned mischievous as he looked down at you. "Perhaps I could persuade him, given our history."
You shook your head, a glint of amusement dancing in your eyes. Boyd always teased about using his influence to manipulate your work schedule—leaving early, extending your lunch break—but you were adamant about keeping your relationship with him separate from your professional life, regardless of his hand in it. You knew he could pull strings if you asked, but it was important to maintain a sense of independence.
"You did mention we needed to keep Shelby on our side," you reminded him with a playful smile. "I'm pretty sure that's how I ended up agreeing to those early shifts in the first place."
He chuckled softly and leaned in to press another kiss to your nose. "You've got me there, darlin'," he admitted, his voice tinged with affection. "Just wish I had more time with you, is all," he whispered, his thumb gently tracing along your lip before stroking down your chin.
You bit your lip, weighing the possibilities and outcomes in your mind as you gazed up at him. "Perhaps just the morning wouldn't hurt. I'll bring them coffee to make it up—do you think that'll help? Maybe Shelby won't be too upset," you proposed, searching his eyes for reassurance. His gaze softened, a bright grin spreading across his face.
"Oh, baby, I don't think anybody could stay mad at you," he declared in wonderment, and you couldn't help but chuckle. He wasn't merely being sweet—being Boyd Crowder's partner came with its perks as well as its drawbacks, one being that those who didn't want to cross him tended to steer clear of you. It seemed that extended to the Sheriff's department as well.
"I'll call in the morning," you decided, determination firm in your voice.
You rested your head back against his chest, snuggling closer into him as his arms enveloped you, his chin resting atop your head as he spoke softly. "I do believe this'll be the best sleep I've had in a while."
You smiled contentedly against him, feeling the comforting rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your ear. Closing your eyes, you surrendered to the embrace of sleep, your dreams filled with the promise of the morning ahead, shared with Boyd, where every moment, no matter how seemingly ordinary, was something to look forward to.
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