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me Omw to annoy you about more Francesca content đŒđŒ
you and my entire inbox my friend strap in everyone this is gonna be The Francesca Mega Collection. part one The Bed Collection ft You HAVE To Click/Tap To Read Anything ESPECIALLY The Asks
thank you for joining me for the Francesca Bed Collection im going to pass out
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#francesca the cat#snap sketches#OK HI HERE been tryin to posts this for ten asks now cause i severely underestimate the speed of my inbox once it picks up#ironically my sis dropped her cat off for the weekend so. i have much fran inspo LMAO she loves doing the bed thing i confess..#i will be candid and say right now that like. two(? maybe just one) of the asks in this post arent fran related#theyve been sitting in my inbox for weeks but they were used for inspo in this post SO IT COUNTS IM POSTING IT TO FEEL LESS GUILTY OK !!!!!#these arent meant to be a cohesive story or w/e but i mean if you try it can prob be. at least the last two#i was gonna try to knock out all my fran asks today actually but 1.) i underestimated how slow i draw#2.) i got to the thirdv (i made it first in this list but i mean he cutie in the third too..) comic and my brain decided i drew erik too ho#and ive decided to dedicate the rest of my night praying for forgiveness for my lascivious thinkings <- they will continue#but yeah like i said i have all the comics and the sort sketched out buuut i might redo one of them#its kinda nsft flavored (but still cute + sfw) and thats not usually a prob but the asks themselves are wholesome i felt awkward jerLJLK#maybe ill repurpose the beginning panels ... or hell maybe ill just finish them and post them as is#spoilers its more Superhero Roeplay bullshit so it can def be posted on its own without fran.. idk ...#we know how my brain goes Thats Why We're In This Sitch once im given an inch i run a marathon and i dont stop#i be having such intense visions im gonna throw up. anyway wtf was i saying i forget. oh well thaat means EnjoYWAIT I REMEMBER#im tempted to close my inbox for a bit just until i clear out all the asks i wanna draw and ik i dont HAVE to draw them#but as ive said i get visions so easily ...... and i must see them realized ... but then id miss talking to everyone :(#so we ball is simply the answer. ok fr enjoy now LMAO BYYYYEE im gonna go redraw some old stuff i think to wind down#maybe ill touch one more asks cause . cause like Many Of Them its got stuff ive been wantin to draw all week ... heh ...#ok bye we'll see what happens im not checking over these if theres a mistake then by god theres a mistake BYE
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â captain snugglebear.
there is something so funny about calling a very masculine man the cheesiest and corniest petnames
SORRY IT TOOK ME A WHILE TO POST ANYTHING IM ACTUALLY SO EXHAUSTED LOL
the bar was quiet, bathed in the warm glow of dim pendant lights and the soft hum of mellow jazz playing from a dusty speaker in the corner. it was the sort of place people came to for conversation, not chaos, and the perfect spot for task force 141 to unwind after a long mission.
soap was leaning back in his chair, a pint of ale in hand as he recounted a story to gaz, who chuckled quietly, his own glass half-empty. ghost, as always, was a quiet presence, seated at the end of the table with a small tumbler of whiskey, his posture relaxed but ever watchful. price was at the center of it all, one arm draped over the back of his chair, his beer untouched for now, his gravelly laugh filling the air as he chimed in here and there.
the door swung open with a soft creak, and you stepped inside, scanning the room until your eyes landed on the familiar group. you couldnât help but smile when you spotted john, his cap tipped low, his commanding presence impossible to miss even in a setting as unassuming as this.
you strolled over, casual and easy, but with just enough pep in your step to signal that you had something planned. john caught sight of you first, his lips twitching upward in a small smile, but the moment you reached the table, you decided to crank things up a notch.
âhi, my precious sugarplum,â you greeted in the sweetest voice you could muster, sliding up next to him and placing a hand on his broad shoulder. âdid you miss me, my wittle cuddle-muffin?â
the effect was immediate. soap froze mid-sip, choking on his drink as he struggled not to burst out laughing. gaz blinked at you, his eyebrows shooting up in disbelief, before a wide grin spread across his face. even ghost turned his head slightly, giving the impression that if anyone could make him break his stoic demeanor, it might just be you.
price didnât even flinch. his jaw tightened slightly, and he exhaled through his nose, but he remained calm, setting his beer down with deliberate care. âreally, love?â he muttered, his voice low and laced with exasperation.
âoh, donât be like that, snugglebear,â you cooed, leaning in closer, unbothered by the amused stares of his team. âi just couldnât resist saying hi to my lovely babycakes.â
soap couldnât hold it in any longer. he wheezed, slapping the table as he laughed, his voice cutting through the calm of the bar. âcaptainâbabycakes?! och, thatâs bloody brilliant!â
gaz joined in, shaking his head as he grinned. âmate, youâve got some explaining to do.â
even ghost let out an amused huff, the corners of his eyes crinkling beneath his mask.
price pinched the bridge of his nose, muttering something under his breath about never bringing you near the lads again. but when he looked back at you, there was a spark of something soft in his eyes, a warmth that betrayed the stern exterior he usually wore like armor.
âyou done embarrassing me yet?â he asked, though his tone was more resigned than annoyed.
ânot even close, sweetpea,â you replied, grinning as you pressed a kiss to his cheek. ânow, scoot over. iâm joining you.â
he sighed, shaking his head as he slid over to make room, but there was the faintest curve to his lips, a sign that no matter how much you teased him, he wouldnât have it any other way.
soap, however, wasnât letting it go anytime soon. âoi, cap,â he called through his laughter, âye reckon we should start callinâ ye that on ops? snugglebear, aye?
price shot him a look that could have silenced a lesser man. âsay it and see what happens, mactavish.â
you leaned in slightly then, lowering your voice so only john could hear. âaw, donât pout, snugglebear,â you teased softly, the playful lilt in your tone enough to make his jaw tighten.
priceâs eyes flicked to yours, the faintest glimmer of something dangerous sparking beneath his calm exterior. he leaned closer, his voice a quiet rumble just for you. âkeep this up,â he murmured, âand iâll make sure you regret it later.â
your grin widened as you tilted your head, meeting his gaze without hesitation. âpromise?â you whispered back, your tone dripping with challenge.
his response was immediate. a firm pinch to your ass, quick but precise, made you jolt slightly, your grin shifting into a breathless laugh.
âcheeky,â he muttered, his tone low enough to make your stomach flutter. his hand didnât linger, but the look he gave youâequal parts exasperation and fondnessâmade your heart skip all the same.
âyou love it,â you teased, your smile smug as you leaned back, entirely unbothered by the flush creeping up his neck.
soap, noticing the subtle exchange, leaned forward. âwhat was that, then? somethinâ yeâd like tae share wiâ the class, cap?â
ânothing,â price replied smoothly, his voice steady as ever as he picked up his beer and took a slow sip.
you, however, were feeling bold. âjust my teddy bear reminding me how much he loves me,â you said with a cheeky grin.
price exhaled heavily, tipping his cap lower to shadow his eyes as he muttered, âgod help me.â
#call of duty#call of duty x reader#cod mw2 x reader#cod mw2#cod#cod mwii#cod x reader#john price#john price x reader#price x reader
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Im on YouTube and I see a short where a nurse talks about "ice diapers" for post partum care.... idk yall maybe I'm overreacting but something about an ice diaper rather than actual care just pisses me the fuck off. The mechanical, production-focused vibe I get from the OBGYN field is overwhelming and I'm tired of acting like I don't feel it. How embarrassing that you get sent home with a diaper like you're an infant rather than a comfortable pair of underwear. Like I've seen underwear made for post partum use. How embarrassing that the care for the post partum body is so miniscule they send you out and act like nothing happened? They dont talk about pelvic floor exercise, they don't talk about how to breastfeed, they dont teach the father for the life of him how to help, they dont give you meds, they don't do shit but send you home with a giant diaper and tell you to ice an open wound. And the way the nurses and doctors in this field act too is so creepy to me. Rip open your vagina and they'll put their hands in there and feel around, treat your ripped body like it's a cardboard amazon box that they got their item out of already, turn around and infantilize you with the "new mama" shit, then act like the ordeal is done and over. Shit like this reminds me every day why I'll never allow a chance for myself to go through pregnancy. Be near the brink of death due to neglect while people pat me on the head and call me a good girl and then send me home wearing pantaloon-esque diapers.
Maybe an ice diaper helps, and yknow what I'd be ecstatic if that was a miniscule tip on how to comfort the injured body even more, but the fact that they throw together some trashy shit and call it a day then beg on their knees for women to give birth over and over again makes me go CRAZYYYYYYYYY
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this is my first time hearing of this so i dont know if theres like some other context related to this im missing (or if this message just happened out of the blue) but i dont really wanna know either way.
^^^ but all points in this are valid (the reblogged post i mean)
i would like to at least hold out hope that nothing bad happened until it is confirmed (do not ask them what happened, im sure its stressful as it is) but that is not to say that i invalidate the people who spoke up because im sure they have their reasons too but we do not know what happened and we cannot know what (again do not ask what, we are not entitled to that information)
i want to believe in both sides. i don't want to end up being the kind of person who doesn't believe in a victim or is against a person who didn't actually do anything wrong, so im going to be patient and if nothing ever gets said about it thats fine too
do not speculate. what comes out of it could be aiming pitchforks at someone who didn't do what you think they did, or bringing out someone's trauma over something all over again because you want to know or you think oh maybe this could be why so and so happened
this is my own opinion, but id say to withhold any judgment and thought you might have on this until we get a confirmation. this is not to say that you can do whatever you want with this information after, because that is not true at all.
feeling uncomfortable regarding it is valid, im not saying you cant have your own opinions over it, id just prefer it if people could treat this sensitively, and with respect for the other members to not try to find out more then what has been shared, nor overly target people over something you do not have confirmation over
im sorry as ive been repeating points a lot, but ive seen people acting really disrespectfully to all the people involved in something similar to this because they want to know, but they do it with zero regard for the person on the other side of the screen
(this is more referring to people asking those who were friends to that person about it but it was a really bad situation overall, and they were attacking them when they didn't get a response out fast enough without considering that they'd just learned that someone they cared about was a terrible person and needed time to process that. now in this case its not fully confirmed but i really dont want to see that happen again.)
^ updating my response above, as there is a doc with information about what happened which i noticed in one of the comments on the original post. i just wasnt sure if something really bad happened considering the vague statement in the twitter post but considering its been spoken out now of what happened i can safely conclude that hes probably not innocent (understatement). (again, please do not hound the victims nor the hermits on information about this)
i just didnt wanna assume anything. this isnt to say that i didnt trust in what evidence they saw that made them conclude that the accusations were credible, it was just worded in a way that sounded very vague, and as a person who would like to see the goodness in everyone i tend to stay in denial about these kinds of things because i want to believe that they are not that kind of person, at the very least until its either admitted by the guilty party, or theres a credible statement from the victim
also it might feel like im understating things with how i describe them, thats my bad. i usually describe things in swear words but considering hermitcraft has a mainly young audience im trying not to and it also feels a little inappropriate over a serious topic. but it means i default to referring to something as 'bad' or 'not so good' which can come off as like im trying to make it seem not as bad as it actually is which isn't true at all. im just trying to be really careful about how i word things or what i say considering this is a serious topic but it means im not sure how to describe it so i end up going with what i default to outside of swears.
um. also please dont go asking for proof from the people affected nor the hermits cause i really dont think its appropriate and could lead to triggering them further. its also very personal.
i emphasize my point as a person who has also gone through bad things, and trying to look back through those old messages were really triggering and it was just not a good time. i imagine it was rough enough to get screenshots of what they did get so please leave it alone. they went through the trouble of sharing it in public, you are not entitled to more
and i get it might be rough to trust CCs after having your trust broken with one being revealed to be a bad person but PLEASE do not accuse other CCs of the same behavior. they are just as shaken as you that someone they thought they knew could be like that. please leave them alone, thank you.
PLEASE KEEP THIS IN MIND:
we, as fans, do not have a right to private information. anything shared with us on this is a privilege. please do not abuse it. the cc's could shut down and never talk about it if we overwhelm them.
also, please keep in mind that ONE HERMIT and THE ENTIRETY OF HERMITCRAFT are NOT THE SAME THING. the entire fandom is not 'ruined' or 'completely unsafe' because of the actions of one person.
PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME THAT THE OTHER HERMITS KNEW ANYTHING ABOUT WHATEVER'S GOING ON WITH ISKALL. this is not some big conspiracy, it's the consequences of one person's actions. they weren't hiding this from us, that's not how hermitcraft works, they truly didn't know. they probably knew as much as us about this, so making it an 'us against them' situation is immature and shortsighted.
ALSO, I AM BEGGING EVERYONE TO PLEASE NOT SENSATIONALIZE THIS. PLEASE DO NOT TURN HATING ISKALL INTO A MEME OR A JOKE.
mcyt'ers being revealed to be less-than-great people is not a rare thing, sadly, but i've seen it turned into a joke/meme/trend in other fandoms. this both minimalizes the actual people's/victims' struggles, makes the entire situation feel less serious than it is, especially to outsiders looking in, and makes everyone in the fandom look immature, petty, unable to take anything seriously, and genuinely harmful.
this server, fandom, and community are not dying, it is not ruined forever, this is one (major, i'm not trying to minimalize it) issue that we're currently dealing with. it will be okay. we will move on. this is not the beginning of the end. please calm down. i love this fandom, god bless all of you. <3
edit: doc has said on stream that we will likely get more information as time passes. like i said, this is a PRIVILEGE. we are not OWED information. please be grateful for what we're given, and POLITELY ask questions if you must. if a cc doesn't give you the answer you want, or doesn't answer at all, LEAVE THEM ALONE. THIS IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO HARASS PEOPLE. the hermits are likely just as stressed out as us, if not probably more so, so please keep that in mind when contacting them.
don't freak out, we'll be okay, this is not the end of the world, nor is it the end of Hermitcraft. we will be okay.
second edit: please remember that (at least as far as we know) ISKALL AND STRESS WERE NOT KICKED OR BANNED. THEY LEFT OF THEIR OWN VOLITION.
ALSO!!! VERY IMPORTANT!!!
WE. DO. NOT. KNOW. EXACTLY. WHAT. HAPPENED.
PLEASE DO NOT ASSUME ANYTHING SIMPLY BASED OFF OF OTHER MCYT'ERS PAST ACTIONS/SCANDALS. WE DO NOT KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE MIGHT NOT EVER KNOW EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. WE NEED TO BE OKAY WITH THAT AND NOT DRAW OUR OWN CONCLUSIONS.
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hi!!! im new on here and ive been binge reading all of ur stuff đ im not sure if this is where you send reqs but if it is in begging for an older brotherâs best friend trope w katsuki đ i absolutely adore this trope and i js imagine katsuki pretending to be so annoying w picking you up or âbabysitting youâ for his friend bur he secretly rlly likes it. thank u sm! <3
OMG HELLLOOO!! THANK YOU FOR BINGE READING MY STUFF!! this is where u send requests and Iâm totally inlove with this idea you just opened my eyes. 2 POSTS IN 1 DAYYY?? Iâm spoiling all 50 of my followers đ
Off-limits, Right? â katsuki bakugo
IN WHICHâŠkatsuki was your older brothers bestfriend, you hated him, he hated you, I mean why else would he constantly tease you? so yeah, you guys hated eachother. rightâŠ?
Pairing; Katsuki bakugo x Afab!reader
Content contains; fem!reader, SUGGESTIVE! mdni, swearing, corny scenarios, katsuki uses âprincessâ in a mocking way, reader is 19, katsuki is 21, and brother is 22, swearing.
Word count; smth over 1k
A/N; this was a wonderful request Iâm sorry I couldnât do it justice !! đ© I hope ur happy with the result nonetheless!! <3
he was insufferable, he just couldnât leave you alone. everytime he comes over to hang out with your brother, you avoid him and stay in your room at pretty much all costs; yet he always finds a way to still get under your nerves.
the stupid calls behind the door as they make their way to your brothers room,
âaww princess, you donât miss me?â he yells behind the door, you can hear the cocky bastards smirk. you groan and just ignore him as he laughs with your brother. stupid boys.
it doesnât stop there though, if you ever decide to come out of your room you better prayyyy hes not down there because heâs teasing you to absolutely no end.
âoh the beast has awoken I see?â he smirks and rests his elbows on the kitchen island, eyeing you up and down like you were a piece of meat. you roll your eyes and continue to open your fridge and get a drink.
âwould you just shut up for once katsuki?â you bite back and he lets out an airy mocking laugh, putting his hands up in fake defense.
âeasy there, just playin around sleeping beauty.â that stupid smirk never leaving his lips, you groan and grab your drink before descending up the stairs back to your room.
and you see, it would be a lot easier to avoid katsuki if him and your brother werenât constantly in eachothers back pocket. It was frustrating, all you wanted was for him to leave you alone!
and then the worst possible thing happened.
âyoo, y/n.â your brothers voice speaks, tapping you on the shoulder, you tilt your head to look over your shoulder and hum a response. âokay donât kill me but..memomanddadaregoingtoabarandkatsukihastobabysityou.â you stare at him blankly.
âokay what the actual fuck did you just say to me.â he takes in a deep breath and repeats himself slower. âme mom and dad are going to a bar and katsuki has to babysit you.â he has an anxious scrunch plastered on his face, prepared for you to blow up.
âwhat the HELL?â you slam the book you were reading closed, the sound echoed through the house. âI donât need a fucking babysitter! Iâm 19!â he sighs and attempts to calm you down.
âI know, i know, I agree! I tried to tell mom and dad that but I guess they just didnât trust youâŠâ you scoff at this and slouch in your seat with another loud groan rumbling past your lips.
âso they decide to have fucking katsuki babysit me? you know how much I hate him.â you glare up at him and he sighs for you.
âyeah I know..look itâs only for one night! Iâm sure youâll survive right?â you scoff at him and slam yourself up from the couch and reach your room, spending the rest of your time there before katsuki shows up.
âding dongâ you hear the doorbell and immediately plant your face in your pillow, mentally preparing for the night youâre about to have. you can hear him buttering up your parents, talking about how their âprecious daughterâ is in wonderful hands. what a fucking joke. the minute everybody left, he sighs before yelling up the stairs.
âyou gonna sit up in your room the whole time?â you can hear the cockiness dripping in his tone even through a whole staircase and your door. you sigh, bouncing off your bed and opening your door walking down the stairs with the least pleasant expression on your face.
âah thereâs the princess, wipe that look off your face. Iâm not any happier about this.â you scoff and continue your walking down the stairs, reaching him at the bottom and glaring into his eyes. âyeah right.â you remark sarcastically and push past his shoulder and walk back to your spot on the couch. he sighs to himself and grouchily walks over to sit next to you, creating a respective distance.
âthe tv remotes right here,â you toss it at him and he catches with no problems, gosh fucking loser has to be good at everything. âput whatever you want on, I donât care.â you dismiss him and open your book again, deciding thatâs the best way to drown him out.
âoh so the princess isnât always cold hearted?â he bit his lip partially with a slight smirk, you couldnât help but shy away from his gaze back onto your book and stutter out a âyeah whatever..â he put on some creepy ass movie, you werenât even watching it but the noises and jumpscares were kind of getting to you, you put the book down for one second and then got invested into the movie, katsuki took notice of this but decided to not say anything to scare you off just yet.
a certain jumpscare got to you, and you flinched with a high pitched âeek!â he only laughed at you and looked at you with a faux mocking pout.
âaww princess you scared?â his pout turned into a smirk, and he licked his lips slightly. âs-shut up katsuki.â you roll your eyes and attempt to play it off before he just has to open his mouth again.
âcmon you want me to hold you so the monsters wonât get you?â he opens his arms and laughs when you immediately protest. âew, katsuki! quit!â he nonetheless throws your âstupidâ book across the room and before you even have time to think heâs grabbing you by the shoulders and planting you on his lap.
âkatsukiâ eughâ let me go!â you whine trying to wiggle out of his grasp, he sighs before speaking, âkeep movin like that on me and youâre definitely not going.â you gasp at his comment and hit him on the arm.
âgross katsuki!â he just laughs and you eventually accept your fate on his lap, trying to avoid the fact youâre on your older brothers bestfriends lap. You continue on with the movie, eventually relaxing into katsukis hold when another jumpscare causes you to jump in his hold, he mocks you with a laugh and suddenly his mouth is very close to your ear, you can feel his hot breath trickling down your neck and it causes you to stiffen. âyou scared, princess?â he whispers deeply into your ear, you try to shake off the flustered feeling and shake your head no.
âare you sure? maybe this will help take your mind off things.â and before you can even think to protest, your being spinned around on his lap, face to face with him. your legs were straddling either side of his now and he rests his hand on your lower back, pushing you closer to him.
âkatsukiâ mm!â you were cut off to him pressing a kiss to your lips, even though your mind was telling you âno, no, back away!â your body seemed to have a different idea, leaning into his touch and kissing right back causing his signature smirk to envelop his face, smiling into the kiss.
it turned into a heated makeout session, your hands resting on his neck, one of his hands rubbing down your back and the other behind your neck, pulling you impossibly closer. the only thing that could be heard was the movie you had both long forgotten about and the smacks of your lips colliding.
âyou donât knowââ he breathes out before planting another kiss to you, ââhow long Iâve wanted this.â you continue your assault to his lips and only pull away for a short response back. âyeah?â he hums an agreement into the kiss, at this point youâre practically grinding on eachother, your brows furrowing and mouth parting slightly, and suddenly it all hits you.
you pull away abruptly, his lips chasing yours before a look of confusion wipes over his face. âwe shouldnât be doing this.â you speak and nervously tuck your hair behind your ears. âwell itâs a little late for that princessâŠâ you groan and bury your head in your hands, what were you thinking?
âI mean we donât really have to stop nowââ you shush him quickly, he rolls his eyes but listens nonetheless, as if on que you can here the doorknob jiggle, you spring off his lap and back onto your designated place on the couch, katsuki grabs a pillow to cover his crotch which you gave him a disgusted look for, as if you werent practically leaking through your panties right now.
they walk through the door, everybody greeting their hellos before your mother speaks up at the sight, âaw look at you two! finally getting along I see?â you grumble at her words but katsuki speaks up with a sly grin, âyou could say that.â she gushes over this fact, katsuki was always her favorite friend of your brothers. only you and him knew the true meaning behind his words, eventually everybody gets ready to part their goodbyes, and youâre about to ascend up the stairs again before katsuki calls your name.
you spin around to face him, and stride over he unexpectedly hugs you, which your mother âaweâsâ at, little did she know he just whispered âcall me.â in your ear, leaving you a flustered mess, you say your quick goodbye and rush up to your room.
what weâre you gonna do.
a/n; if this does well Iâll do part 2 but prolly not
#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki x reader#bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugo x you#bakugo katsuki x you#katsuki x you#bakugo x you#katsuki bakugo x y/n#bakugo katsuki x y/n#katsuki x y/n#bakugo x y/n#mha katsuki bakugo#mha bakugo katsuki#mha katsuki#mha bakugou#bnha katsuki bakugou#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha katsuki#bnha bakugou#mha x reader#mha x you#mha x y/n#bnha x reader#bnha x you#bnha x y/n#.thenaoneshot
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People comparing CaitVi dynamic season 1 and 2, are we watching two different shows or y'all just forgot what happened in the middle. There was literally a war going on, Cait's mom fucking died like are they just gonna be lovey dovey with all these politics going on? And then one moment they leave everything to just be with each other in that jail cell you are also mad like wdyw?
Also people who say their sex scene is not necessary and/or a bad representation.
Firstly, JayceMel also got a sex scene in season 1 so its not like they invented sex just for these two lesbians.
Secondly, they didnt just fuck. Vi was beating herself up thinking she made the wrong decision and fucking things up like always and Cait told her that she actually let the guards go so Vi can do that exact thing she wanted. Ultimately saying a) she trusted Vi when she said Jinx has changed and wanted Vi to let the girl out b) she wanted Vi to be happy more than she wanted revenge even tho just some months ago she was the opposite.
Thirdly, we see the detail, Cait hesitates when she sees the bandage where she used to hit Vi. We see Cait taking off her clothes and showing her all, being vulnerable because Vi deserves that much from her.
Fuck. I get it, ok? This is a rare time we got a wlw relationship where both are main characters, and in a big show like this so you want it to be perfect and deprive of all flaws. But wouldnt you rather have two well-written characters where they relationship is tangled with the core of who they are than just a wlw couple with no conflict, no personal development no nothing? Hows that a good representation? Their relationship doesnt solve the conflict between them and their politics but is the reason why they were intertwined in the first place.
And dont come at me about systematic problems as well like Im a poc myself living in a white country and a sociology graduate. I understand Caitlyn did terrible things and is a war criminal herself with how she stands aside letting Ambessa did the thing she did and for gasing Zaun just to seek revenge. But she, just like everyone is a product of her sociocultural surroundings, shes a human affected by their beliefs and emotions. Isnt that the point of the show?
I dont think she got her happy ending just because she lives, I think being alive is her purnishment. She has her whole life to make up for what she did and I believe she will. What other fate you think she deserves? Her death will not undo her crimes, so is prison, they will also prevent her from actually fixing what she caused and ultimately using her priviledge for good(which shes doing, you can read my post about it). And Im not about to start the whole ethic debate on prison. How does one define a purnishment worthy? How do one define what a person deserves?
Finally, you know who else was a war criminal and walked away with what he wanted? Singed. Reality is like that, not black and white. People dont get what we think they deserve, ever.
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riddle me this. what does a 50 million dollar drive, a giant helmet made from recycled materials, the british media, safety infringements, an aborted start, six red flags, rain, team orders, the first black flag in seventeen years, the dutch national anthem and ayrton sennas 1990 mclaren all have in common?Â
stumped? well iâll tell you.Â
itâs the 2024 brazilian grand prix.
the last race of our second to last triple header. a sprint weekend. and chaos in its highest form.
today is november 23, 2024 and make sure you get a snack because this is a long one.Â
we started the week off pretty strong with lance stroll getting broken up with on his birthday.
well, maybe.Â
his girlfriend deleted all of the pictures of him off of her instagram account on his birthday, which really doesnt look good. and this really set the tone for the week of bonkers shit that was now upon us.Â
things like lando being asked about the dreaded Last Week With Max incident. in an interview he was asked (told?)
âAre you aware that people watching at home don't want to see the fight between you and Max for the world championship ending in radio messages, tedious steward inquires, time penalties? They want to see you racing nicely and cleanly.âÂ
lando was in agreement clearly because he saidÂ
âAnd so do I! And I do.â
max on the other hand still remained max about the situationÂ
he was asked  during the press conference: âa lot has been said since mexico. are you going to change the way you go racing this weekend?âÂ
and max said, like a badass:
âyeah, ive heard that before in my career. its my tenth year in formula 1. i think i know what im doing!â
christian horner brought receipts, as in actual data sheets, to his mexico gp media session about how maxâs penalties from mexico were unjust. i don't think that anyone really listened to any of this though because the penalties were never unturned.Â
one penalty that they did figure out what charlesâs swear penalty from the press conference in mexico. the fia finally made a decision. charles will be pleased to know that he does Not have to do community service with max. but honestly (and this is now my own opinion here) why give one guy community service and not give it to the other? max apologized for his language Before he said âthe car is fucked.â charles apologized After once he realized what was going to happen. not really sure here why the fia is out to get max but whatever i don't make the rules. also. the fines and the community service seem to Only be confined to the press conferences because as we know. people have cursed in the cool down room (lando in singapore notably) and also many have over the radio (checo, franco, charles, george, etc etc) and they have not been told anything. hm. in any case though, we have more important things to focus on than weird swear bans.Â
like charles leclerc nation going insane when this video was posted, which is a new contender for best weird yet still sexy video of charles on the ferrari page
liam lawson told everyone that he is ânot here to make friends, im here to win.â following his Incidents with fernando and also checo at the us and mexican gps. which is interesting for a few reasons. 1. hes in a vcarb and statistically they have not won a single thing all season because they are vcarb and 2. he was soon after seeing being besties with yuki.
oh and also. max reacted to (was asked about?) the whole liam flipping checo off while they were driving in mexico thing, and max said âCheco, I think if I did that to you, I would be quite afraid leaving the country.â
and there were also the usual âthis is checoâs last race weekendâ general threats. weve seen these before. so theyre not worth wasting typing space on because i cant imagine that theyre going to fire him this late into the season. and why would we talk about the goofy red bull rumors that always are swirling everywhere when we could instead talk about lewis hamilton and franco colapinto.
lewis hamilton praised the crap out of franco colapinto. at the press conference on media day. as we all know franco is a lewis fangirl. so. he honestly might still be in a state of shock. Â
âIt's always great to see young people, young talented individuals get the opportunity to come through and shine, and he did that in the first race. We had a great little battle and it was super safe. It was hard but fair. [...] He's saying it's not for him to decide, but my advice would be - I would be pushing on my side to make sure I'm doing absolutely everything. At the end of the day, he's got to continue to focus on doing his job every weekend, as he is, and hopefully, he's got good people behind him who are doing the right job to make sure that he's here racing next year.â
and low and behold a few hours later franco did make a fangirl post about it.
also. brazil is Not francoâs home race, but they are now officially in south america, so it was like a home race adjacent for him (hes from argentina) and the crowds were definitely in agreement. we will get back to that later.Â
there was a fan at the race who saw him in the paddock and yelled at him âFRANCO. CAN YOU SIGN MY SHIRT? ITâS A KNOCKOFF ONE. FRANCOOOOOâ and he lost his shit over that. because remember a few weekends ago he told everyone to buy williams knockoff merch cause it was just as good and not as much money?
we also had some helmets. valtteris had coffee on it because its something that brazil is known for.
oscars had funny little androids on it that were all different hims (he also said he only recently learned that it was polite cat and not sleepy cat)
esteban had some brazil themed stuff
lewis had a senna/brazil tribute helmet
lewis was also going to get to drive ayrton sennaâs 1990 mclaren after qualifying on saturday.
oh and of course we had stake do a funny little meme thing on their twitter because theyre quite known for their funny little meme things.
is this a terrible glimpse at media day? yeah absolutely but u know what i have 7 pages of notes front and back from the races themselves so deal with it i suppose. unlike what some of you may think, i 1. do not want to be writing this post forever and 2. also have other things i need to do.
one person was not at media day though and it was fernando alonso and it was because he was in the hospital im pretty sure somewhere in spain for what im also pretty sure was intestinal issues. he had also been out last week for media day due to sickness, but he was back for the race. between this and laceâs probable breakup it was shaping up to be a banner weekend for aston martin, and it was only going to get worse!
someone who definitely didn't miss media day though was sebastian vettel. if you don't know who sebastian vettel is, he was a four time world champion, menace, shit stirrer and boy toy twink esque guy who is now mostly unreachable and is the epitome of âhey i cant do nothing to nobody no moreâ and comes out of hiding maybe twice a year to subject the grid to a new arts and crafts project. but do not be fooled. this is the same guy who was asked, after winning his first race, if it was the best moment of his life and he said, and i quote âyou obviously werenât there when i lost my virginity.â anyway, this time his arts and crafts project was a giant helmet made from recycled materials paying tribute to ayrton senna. and yes, he made the whole grid get in the helmet. his whimsey is still off the charts.
he was also wearing really terrible shorts. as in they were long, over the knee khaki shorts. some things never change.Â
he also tried to make a bet with sky germany about max winning the championship. sky germany refused.
ok im not even going to Pretend to know what happened during the practice session. max got a 5 place grid penalty for sundays race because he took a new engine. i think georgeâs car briefly broke? idk. he did get it fixed tho and ended the session in p2, behind lando who was p1. and then we had a special guest in p3.
who was it? well i will give you a clue. it was NOT kevin magnussen!!! why? because he wasnât feeling well.
so, everyones favorite (team dubbed) âsuper subâ jumped back in the cockpit once again.Â
you guessed it, it was ollie bearman!!! originally i think he was supposed to just be in for practice (and yes he did get p3 in practice). but since its a sprint weekend (yeah, i forgot that too) that means theres only one practice session and then sprint qualifying later that day. and so. the way formula racing works. is that whatever driver drives the car for qualifying also needs to drive the car for the race. they cant get replaced if the car has already qualified.Â
ollie by the way had never driven in brazil before. he said that he did it once in a video game. and now he was about to do it irl in a real car. he also got a phone call at 6:45am saying heyyyyy buddyyyy you wanna jump in the car this weekend? we happen to have an opening! and well that's not the exact quote but that is what happened. Â
and then haas announced that kevin was not going to be racing that weekend due to sickness. ollie responded in a definitely very normal way which was âof course condolencesâŠi mean, give my best to kevin.â and then he was officially In The Car for the weekend. what could do wrong??? Â
well lets just say that a Lot happened:
starting with lovely and wonderful Sprint Qualifying. yes thatâs right. this is a sprint weekend. why does the fia do this to us guys.Â
two things were important to note.Â
there was a slight threat of rain
2. the track had been resurfaced and it was bumpy, which is not great when you're driving over 200kph. it really can affect your vision and also your back
lewis had trouble with the car a few years ago when it was porpoising and he was also not doing great at this race. but merc said that he was âall good.â he was not the only driver complaining about the bouncing though. it was extreme and it was dangerous and we will hear more about it later.Â
i think that franco took a nap at some point. at least its in my notes so it must have happened. and i think that it was also in the car. unfortunately i don't have a photo. like many other things on this post you will just have to trust me.
aston martin had decided that their car sucked to massive degrees and rolled back their upgrades all the way to suzuka. u know, just to see if they could figure out what the fuck was wrong with their car. Unfortunately though they could not because both of their drivers got out during sq1.Â
one team was pleased with what was happening and that was mclaren. they had a new rear wing that was brazil specific and also apparently legal unlike the last one and they were Flying. in sq2 lando took the fastest time with a 1.09.0. on medium tires. last years fastest time was 1.10 on soft tires, so in the words of the commentators, ânorris is on another planet!â this was good for them because they hadnt actually been sure they were going to be able to race. theor freight for their car (and some other teams cars) had all been delayed cause they were shipped in wooden boxes and you cant ship things in wooden boxes to brazil because they need to protect the rain forest.
the commentators, mostly karun, also lamented about the swear bans, which they rightfully thought were stupid as hell. he brought up a good point though which was âare you going to have translators for every language? how are you going to monitor it?â because very few of them speak english as their first language and most speak more than 1 language so it is possible they could just curse in Not English
but we don't have time for that right now. not when ollie bearman had just knocked checo out of sprint qualifying. thatâs right, ollie went just slightly faster, pushing checo from p10 down to p12.Â
liam and checo also almost crashed. which wasn't a surprise but it was still funny.
also surprising was that oscar pulled out a pole lap at the very end of sq3, a 1:08.899, only a few thousandths faster than lando.Â
âwhere did that come from?â karun asked. âwas he saving something in his pocket away from his teammate? that is a very fernando alonso trickâ
regardless of what it was, he was still on pole. for the second time during a sprint.Â
âvery very happy,â oscar said in his interview. âtry and win obviouslyâŠstarting from the best seat in the house, make sure it stays that way.â which is an important surprise tool that you should all remember for later. later being the sprint race.Â
they all lined up
oscar, lando, charles, max, carlos, george, pierre, liam, alex, ollie, lewis, nico, checo, franco, valtteri, fernando, esteban, yuki, lance and guanyu.Â
and before we get into the sprint, lets get a little reminder on the championship standings.
1 Max Verstappen 362
2 Lando Norris 315
3 Charles Leclerc 291
4 Oscar Piastri 251
5 Carlos Sainz 240
6 Lewis Hamilton 189
7 George Russell 177
8 Sergio Perez 150
9 Fernando Alonso 62
10 Nico Hulkenberg 31
11 Lance Stroll 24
12 Yuki Tsunoda 22
13 Kevin Magnussen 14
14 Alexander Albon 12
15 Daniel Ricciardo 12
16 Pierre Gasly 9
17 Oliver Bearman 7
18 Franco Colapinto 5
19 Esteban Ocon 5
20 Liam Lawson 2
21 Zhou Guanyu 0
22 Logan Sargeant 0
23 Valtteri Bottas 0
so max, lando and i believe also charles and maybe oscar?? were still in contention for the championship title. and as a reminder. oscar was starting on pole, with lando, charles and max all behind. lando was able to knock some points off of max in mexico with the time penalties that he racked up and was really hoping to continue to do that in brazil. so max needed to get around charles at the start asap so he could start duking it out with the mclarens.
and speaking of mclaren, there was some good speculation that we might get faced once again with the âpapaya rulesâ aka mclaren team orders. as in, oscar might have to let lando past.
and so. lets see what happened on lap 1.Â
well. max did not pass charles. lewis dropped several places, ollie dropped several places, and the two mclarens started to pull away from the rest of the pack, especially oscar who managed to get half a second ahead of lando.Â
so we had a slightly new running order:
oscar, lando, charles, max, carlos, george, pierre, liam, nico, ollie, alex, checo, franco, lewis, esteban, valtteri, yuki, fernando, lance and guanyu
and then max and charles started battling on lap 3. by lap 4 charles had taken the fastest lap. and by lap 6 he had closed the gap to lando and was in an epic drs train because lando had also closed the gap to oscar.
george had also started struggling, probably because he was in a mercedes, and was trying to get passed by pierre gasly, in a alpine.Â
lando meanwhile, was still up in p2 and not entirely pleased.Â
âyeah, im not sure what were doing here i thought we talked about thisâ he said over his radio right before he locked up and fell out of oscars drs and into charles and then also maxâs drs. he was probably referring to, why the hell hadnât mclaren done their team orders business yet?
well, his race engineer, will jacobs, had absolutely no information to offer for him, he instead said. âunderstood keep doing what youâre doing.âÂ
âyeah whatever,â lando said, unimpressed.Â
there was some announcer speculation that oscar might give it up to him on the last lap, on the last corner, similar to what lando did to oscar way back in hungary. hungary? idk. its been a long season. and its still even longer.
anyway. checo had been stuck down behind nico hulkenberg in 11th for a very solid nine laps, unable to pass him. he finally managed it on lap 9. his reward? another haas to pass! ollie bearman! he managed that a few laps later and was met with quite possibly his biggest foe: liam lawson. who, just to add even more insult to injury, was in the last points position of the race.
mclaren meanwhile had decided to do some team orders, but not the ones that lando wanted. they told oscar to drop back to give lando some drs, to rescue him from the charles and max inferno that was chasing him. and oscar did. the top 4 though were still separated only by 4 seconds.Â
and charles, he understood the assignment. he was racing absolute balls to the wall, elbows all the way out. doing anything and everything to keep max behind him.Â
max was though, unimpressed.Â
âah come on charles man, so many mistakes,â he said over the radio.Â
charles was told about this post sprint, and he had a funny little reaction. unfortunately i could only find that reaction in gif format.
in any case, i believe this was a clip from sky sports, possibly probably alex jaques who said after that radio "that is max verstappen urging a rival that he's had since his childhood to stay with the McLaren because he wants the ferrari to stay there. but that error has created now two battles instead of a four car battle for the lead."
to make it worse for max, lando could have gotten ahead of oscar here, but alas there were no team orders. so he could not. and also he was still slightly too close to charles and max to not be under threat from them. still, oscar was told to floor it to open the gap between lando and charles, for the potential swap.Â
and there was nothing that charles could do about it cause he had absolutely no battery power.Â
will jacobs finally decided to mention the team orders threats on lap 17. âwe are happy to hold these positions until the last lap.âÂ
to which lando said âyeah i will overtake.âÂ
and so it seemed that the commentators were correct. there was a prophesied last lap swap coming from mclaren.Â
in case you're tired of this mess, checo was still battling for 8th place with liam. he managed to get it very briefly. and then he lost it because he locked up.Â
oscar went fastest on lap 18. and then max also passed charles.Â
so it was game fucking on at the front of the grid. and everyone, including gp, maxâs race engineer, knew it. because he told max on lap 19 âcmon mate, lets chase em down.âÂ
mclaren responded as anyone would. by telling oscar âverstappen we believe is faster than leclercâ on lap 24. which is like. fork found in kitchen. max is the king of putting that red bull in places that it should never be allowed to go and that is the front of the grid.Â
speaking of red bulls, checo finally managed to pass liam lawson for 8th. and he did it cleanly without locking up this time. and liam didn't even flip him off.
and mercedes, to no ones surprise, had no race pace.Â
then! interestingly! there was a yellow flag! but the cameras didn't quite cut fast enough so we didn't really see what happened. turned out that nico hulkenberg had pulled off with an exhaust issue. he was technically off the track, but it was not in an overtaking spot (can overtake during yellow flags) and he seemed to still be trying to maneuver the car further away from the track, so the announcers said that this would not hurt the overtaking battle that was looming between the mclarens and max. the cameras then jumped back to that, kind of ignoring nico.Â
they had still not swapped, and max was gaining.Â
then the cameras cut Back to nico hulkenberg. and he was now out of the car. standing on the grass near some barriers. and this picture doesnt really do it justice but he is about 15 feet from a live race track
(there was still a yellow flag in that specific sector but he was OUT OF THE CAR next to a FORMULA 1 TRACK with NO SAFETY CAR)Â
there was now though a Threat of a safety car. gee i wonder why. his car was stopped not too far from the track and he was standing on the track, it was a massive disaster waiting to happen.Â
and so, mclaren gave the team order to swap positions.Â
lando and oscar did.Â
and immediately.
and i MEAN IMMEDIATELY they called a virtual safety car.Â
oscar had dropped back into the clutches of max verstappen and max had just revved up to pass him when suddenly! no no! safety car!
which was interesting.
but we will get back to that in a minute.
now, under a virtual safety car, cars need to keep the gap between them, but the track can go green at any moment and without any warning.Â
and max was on top of that. âpay attention to this!â he said over radio âbecause if hes (oscar) on purpose driving slow (to give lando a bigger gap) report it!âÂ
oscar though seemingly remained on his best behavior.Â
and on the last lap the virtual safety car was announced to be ending.Â
max was getting antsy behind the two mclarens and pulled up next to oscar in preparation for the track going green, but it went green a second too late and oscar was able to pull away and make a beeline all the way to the checkered flag while still keeping max behind.Â
lando came in first, followed by oscar, max, charles, carlos, george, pierre, checo, liam, alex. lewis, franco, esteban, ollie, yuki, guanyu, and lance and nico DNFd.Â
oscar was clearly very disappointed about the result (remember he said after sprint qualifying that he wanted to hold onto his p1). and karun wondered aloud if âmark webber will negotiate a bonus for oscar with that, he should.â cause remember, mark webber was the infamous number 2 red bull teammate to sebastian vettel who was forced to pretty much give up anything and everything for him. and, need i remind you, this weekend seb was running willy nilly around the paddock getting drivers to get in his giant recycled helmet. all very distressing things for one mark webber.Â
oscar also said that it was âa bit trickyâŠ.bit bumpyâŠ.learned a lot for the race tomorrow.âÂ
lando said that âwe work well as a team togetherâŠ.i thanked oscarâŠ.he deserved it but you do what you have to do.âÂ
later, in the press conference, an interviewer congratulated oscar on his win. oscar, confused, said âi don't know what i won but thank youâÂ
max said that he âhad to wait for some mistakes and luckily they cameâ in regards to overtaking charles. âit took a bit too long with charlesâŠbut whenever hes on the drs, hes very hard to attack!â
charles said in a later interview about max âi think max was a lot more on the reserve at the beginning then started pushing at the end. he had more pace, he did a better job with tire managementâ
lets remember that these two are Not Teammates.Â
max though was brought to the stewards though for a vsc infringement (when he pulled next to oscar) because that is Not Allowed. and he ended up with a time penalty that demoted him to fourth. so charles ended up finishing third. and he got a penalty point on his super license.
but what about that safety car call?Â
well i am so glad that you asked.Â
the post race show opened with one will buxton talking to one andrea stella, the mclaren team principal. and here was what he had to say about the mclaren 1-2:
âvery good news, a mclaren 1-2⊠[we had a ] clear conversation with both drivers [before the race]â here he then called them both number 1 drivers again (which everyone thought we were past) â[it was] very risky swapping even with 1.5 seconds [to max], we were waiting for a few more seconds to materialize, but it never didâÂ
will buxton, ever the shit stirrer and also as we know, probably the number 1 person pissed at mclarens team strategy this year, then asked why lando was so upset over the radio.Â
andrea was having none of it. âwell i already answered the question didn't i? when you're a number 1 driver you get nervous when you are behindâŠwe needed to do a very good job to stay ahead of him [max].âÂ
he then departed and james hinchcliffe quite literally Stumbled into frame with his own thoughts on the mclaren swap. âit ended to plan, it didn't go to plan,â he said. âthey got very lucky with the vsc.âÂ
he then talked about the vsc. âthe timing of the vsc was weird to meâ you know with the driver being a solid 10 feet from the track with zooming cars? âi don't think it was done the best it could have been done.âÂ
and this seemed to be the general consensus everywhere else online. why on earth wait to call a safety car when quite literally we had a driver who was out of the car and standing next to the track? that is quite literally a Safety Problem. and given the timing of the mcalren swap, it seemed Possible that perhaps race control had been waiting for mclaren to swap before calling the car. which is, as im sure you could all figure out, kind of weird and sketchy.
but aside from that. there was still much praise for max. âmax played it so smart today,â james said, referring to max selectively murdering charlesâs tires by fighting with him for the first half of the race. âwith not the best car on track hes still performing above expectations.âÂ
there was some proper francomania in brazil. so much so that flights from argentina to brazil had sold out. franco said on the post race show that âthe rivalry between brazil and argentina is in football not motor racing.âÂ
pierre had scored a p7 which he was happy with. mostly because it was a points position and those are kinda hard to come by at alpine.Â
lewis though just about wanted to quit. they asked him how his race pace was and he said âhorrendous. one of the worst races ive hadâ which is really saying something when you remember that he has had 353 race starts. he wanted to change the car entirely before quali.Â
and lance stroll also winked at esteban ocon while they were interviewing ollie bearman.Â
most notable quote from the post sprint was this, by max: Â
the interviewer asked him: âlando said âi don't have to change my driving style, if anyone has to do it, it's max.â do you agree? you won't change it?âÂ
and max said: â[im a] three time world champion. i don't have to change anything.â
max, as some of us may forget, is a very good driver, heâs just in a shit car this year and other people are very very fast. finally. but he is in fact a 7 time world champion. he won every race except 3 last year. heâs insane and he loves this sport. it never pays well to underestimate max verstappen.
and with that absolute banger of a line, letâs get into qualifying.Â
what's that? its delayed? why is that?Â
oh! cause its raining!
like comical, almost biblical amounts of rain.Â
during the delay we had one will buxton and one james hinchcliffe speaking to us about all the current drama.
for example: is checo doing enough? apparently christian horner has dialed back the intensity of his support, so whos to say! but then again, this is red bull, they drop people for anything and everything
and they briefly mentioned the audi seat cause everyone is in contention for the audi seat apparently, including gabriel bortoleto, who is currently leading the f2 championship and a mclaren academy driver.
but they mostly debated their favorite topic: what the ever loving fuck is going on at mclaren.Â
specifically, this edition: Why Didn't They Swap Cars Sooner????
(please know this conversation was had in rain jackets in the pouring damn rain and it looked like they were like uh we got no broadcast happening cause downpour we need to fill the time we need to fill the time hmmm what to do oh! we got will and hinch! give then a microphone and let them go for it! and that they did)
james thought that they left themselves exposed to max and charles for too long, and apparently mclaren said that it would swap the cars at the first opportunity originally but then they didn't swap when they said over the radio that the gap to leclerc was significant.Â
will buxton had a theory: âtheyâre trying to do it without upsetting either driverâÂ
he then, in true will buxton fashion, went completely and totally off the rails about it:Â
âandrea stella wrote the guidebook for team orders when he worked at ferrari. where is that? [why arenât they saying âyou work for us, you do what we sayâ?]â
âthe team [the drivers] needs to understand who pays the bills hereâ james added.
âif they don't lay down the law now they put themselves in an awkward position or laterâ will said about how this would affect the future of mclaren because if they were already starting to win now and be in contention for the championships then whos to say that they couldn't do it again next year?
and then, somewhat inexplicably, they stopped talking to us and we had no screens no nothing no view on anyone for about 40 minutes. all we could assume was that qualifying was delayed.Â
and that it definitely was.Â
once we finally got a visual on the track again it was in fact still raining, and only getting worse.Â
but if theres one thing about formula 1, its that they know how to have fun in the rain.
like how they let ted loose in the pit lane and he stalked through the mercedes garage, and proudly told the whole world that bono, lewisâs race engineer, has a carbon fiber cup of tea. and then the camera zoomed in on it.
Â
he then also tried to talk to toto by picking up a headset and shouting into it âwe miss you toto!â but instead of getting to toto the message went to jack, totoâs son? Â
and then someone, i don't remember who, perhaps it was karun, told ted to âlook at fred vasseur, hes a handsome man most of the time.âÂ
the crowds were shouting âole ole ole franco!â which was different from their usual chant of âole ole ole senna!â and will buxton told franco that âflights from buenos aries to sao palo have sold out, that's the affect you are havingâ franco was impressed.
ollie bearman, who has objectively, by the way, been thrown now into three increasingly more insane race weekends (saudi arabia with like a few hours notice, singapore, and now the hellscape that was the giant rain storm in brazil) decided to do the sensible thing and take a nap.
"at his age it's gonna be his bed time soon, right?" one of the servus tv announcers said about ollie.
lewis decided to brave the rain to take some aesthetic rain pics
which he then posted on his instagram story
kimi antonelli was not so lucky. he got shoved into the rain by some mercedes mechanics. for sport.
george meanwhile was off jumping in puddles
instagram
and looking like a polite bowling pin wearing maybe some toe nail polish
and jack doohan made everyone tea in the alpine garage
instagram
oscar had a lovely little chat with fernando alonso
and then so did mark webberÂ
perhaps the most insane part of this was that no one and i mean no one knew how they were going to decide the grid order, should qualifying not happen. and as it got progressively more and more delayed, that was looking like it was going to be the case.Â
the race director told everyone at one point that it was ânot really possible to qualifyâ which was you know, a problem, since that needs to happen in order for them to race.Â
hilariously, there was nothing in the regulations for if someone like this were to happen.
next years regulations said that championship standings could be used for qualifying order if qualifying was not able to occur, but that's not this years regs so they couldn't do that. there were though regulations for what should happen should qualifying for a sprint race not be able to occur and that was use the standings from practice 1. and there was also regulations for what should happen if qualifying could not occur on a normal race weekend and that was use the standings from practice 3. but this was a sprint weekend in the main grand prix. so should they use the standings from practice 1? that would be particularly advantageous to haas who had ollie bearman come in third. should they use the standings from the sprint race? that would benefit mclaren.Â
âiâll add this to the list of reasons why iâm glad im not a steward,â karun said.
they continued to debate. everyone went back and forth. theyre going to use practice 1! theyre going to use the sprint! theyâll use sprint qualifying!Â
they got a hold of mike krak (the aston martin tp) who said that it was âa bit too dark and a bit too gloomy and a lot wetâ definitely too wet for racing.Â
sure enough qualifying was then switched from âdelayedâ to âpostponedâ perhaps indefinitely.Â
there was a chance that they could move qualifying to sunday morning. but the weather was not good for then either. and so the session ended, with no one knowing what the fuck was happening and sir lewis hamilton interrupting f1 ceo Stefano Domenicaliâs interview saying: Â
"I wanna go out give us better wet tyres and warming blankets so we can go out!"Â
and that was it
now, rain at the interlagos circuit is not exactly unheard of. mostly because it is literally interlagos (between two lakes, in portuguese)and theres been some insane rain races here before. namely 2016. max, who was still nearly a rookie and only in his first full year at red bull at that point had qualified fourth but ended up down in 16 with 15 laps to go due to some oversteer and pit stopping. he managed to make it all the way up to 3rd by sheer willpower and insanity alone and toto wolff called it âthe verstappen showâ because it was âphysicsâŠbeing redefined.âÂ
another infamous rain race was the one in 2008, the season finale race and where lewis hamilton won his first world championship title at mclaren. he almost lost the title to felipe massa at ferrari. felipe won the race, and lewis was running in 6th around the last few corners to the checkered flag when the person driving in front of him, timo glock, started going slowly and he managed to pass him for 5th place, which was all he needed to get to win the championship. but there were a few minutes of celebration in the ferrari garage where they thought they had won the drivers championship, until lewis crossed the line. and âis that glock going slowly?â is one of those very famous facing quotes
and last year at qualifying in brazil it ended with an absolutely biblical storm (according to crofty) and we got the infamous max verstappen storm lap for pole position
the running fan theory though as to why there was such massive amounts of rain this year was that nelson piquet was in the paddock. why does this matter? well. nelson piquet (a three time world champion and also father of max verstappenâs current girlfriend kelly) was fined 1 million dollars and banned from entering an f1 paddock again as punishment for racist and homophobic comments he made on video about lewis hamilton. and he was just there. in the red bull garage. like nothing was wrong. (this is made infinitely worse by the way that f1 drivers have since been banned from making âpolitical statementsâ on the track and etc, mostly because lewis in 2020/21 did a bunch of advocating for black lives matter and got some other drivers in on it (he was stopped by the fia for wearing a shirt that said âJustice for Breonna Taylorâ and sebastian vettel did some other advocating for the environment and also lgbt community, so they cant really even complain too much about this)Â
lewis did though tweet this tweet after that whole incident.
but anyway. qualifying. what was to come of qualifying??
well. let me tell you.Â
qualifying was postponed until 7:30am on race day, local time. and the race was moved up to i think 10:30 ??? am? to try and avoid as much weather as possible. which was good progress for f1 cause usually they don't do this.Â
it wasn't great for the drivers though who had to be awake at about 4am, barely ate food and jumped into the cars. esteban ocon set his alarm at precisely 4:31.
and george had coffee on an empty stomach. lando had a nutella sandwich. and off they went.
and by off they went i mean, it was still raining. âwetter than a fishermanâs bootâ according to crofty.
but they were qualifying.
ollie had never driven an f1 car in the wet before. which he was about to get a whole lot of experience doing.
some drivers though really love the wet. rain at at f1 race, while scary, is sort of a neutralizer because it really comes down to the skill of the driver and not so much the car. george loves the wet (a la spa 2021 when he managed to qualify a shitbox williams in p2) and so does esteban and lewis and max among others.
lance also likes a good wet race. âwell hes canadian, lance stroll,â crofty said. âheâs rather good on the ice.â
and to make it extra fun, theres no tire warming blankets for the wet tires to save money, which seems a little counterintuitive, but they don't really get used very often.Â
everyone was whipping around, dodging the puddles as best as they could, trying to clear the track of water a little, and we had some interesting people up in the top 5. as in the top five was esteban ocon, fernando alonso, yuki tsnuoda, checo perez, and lance stroll.Â
and then, could it be? in this economy? a red flag???Â
it indeed was! and it would not be the last!
it was franco, he had found the wall. he was okay. but the car was not.Â
and there was not a lot of time to fix it.
karun took this time to tell everyone that he thought that franco could not possibly get the red bull seat (which was a thing that was being debated hotly in the paddock despite franco saying that he was not in talks for a seat last weekend) because of incidents like this due to his own inexperience.Â
crofty brought up a separate but interesting point which was that in all the previous times that we have had qualifying on a sunday, a german has been on pole.Â
he is of course, correct.Â
japan 2004: michael schumacher
japan 2010: sebastian vettel
australia 2013: sebastian vettel
texas 2015: nico rosberg
japan 2019: sebastian vettel
and there was of course only one german on the grid right now. nico hulkenberg.
âits written in the stars!â crofty proclaimed loudly and to the general annoyance of karun, who did not want there to be a german polesitter this race because then crofty would be âinsufferableâ about it.Â
while they were debating that, the red flag had cleared and everyone went out again. including george russell, who was so impatient to get out that he overtook in the pit lane and despite being impeded a few times, still managed to put his mercedes in p2.Â
max got his lap time deleted and was now stuck down in 12th. lewis still needed to get out of the bottom 5 and lando was stuck in 15th.Â
everyone had one more lap.Â
lewis managed to only go 14th. then got pushed to 15th.
lando managed an okay first sector but needed âa middle and final sector of his life hereâ in order to clear the elimination zone. and he got a personal best in the middle sector but still only managed to go 14th. he was safe, but lewis was out. along with ollie, franco, nico and guanyu.
(âyour run of german poles on a sunday is gone,â karun happily told crofty)
lewis, as could be predicted, was very unhappy with his car. as he should have been. according to crofty he is âone of the top 3 drivers of all time in the wetâ and yet. here he was. in the wet. out in q1.Â
at the start of q2 it was not actively raining, which was good news. but it was still slippy and people still had on wet tires for the most part.Â
george went for a little spin but he was okay. no damage and no walls for him.
carlos was not so lucky.Â
he found the barriers. another red flag.Â
later he said that he had clearly misjudged the grip.
his crash was pretty big, bigger than francos, and again, theres less than 5 hours until the race.Â
everyone was ushered back into the pit lane as the track was cleared and repaired.Â
at the time, oscar was leading, followed by george, lance, max, liam, checo, valtteri, fernando, charles and carlos with lanco, pierre, alex, yuki, and esteban in the drop zone. 5:51 to go.Â
when they came back on track fernando alonso somehow managed to go fastest. could it be his first pole in over 4000 days???
and as everyone was on their final flying lap, including lando and max and checo, the yellow flags came out. it was lance stroll, he had gone off.Â
again, like in the sprint, the cameras did not immediately cut to him. but the announcers said that âi think race control are waiting for these laps to count before calling the red flag.â because several people were on flying laps and it was the end of the session, so it would not be resumed after the red flag.
lando crossed the line. he went fastest. almost immediately the red flag was called. max and checo were unable to finish their flying laps.Â
the red flag has had to be called cause lance was in âa dangerous positionâÂ
later, there was a half baked excuse that they thought that lance was trying to get the car moving which was why they did not call the red flag. this, by the way, was the state of lanceâs car:
it was clearly not in any state to be driven.Â
and yet. it took them 40 whole seconds to call a red flag for this. the previous two red flags were called in under 5 seconds.Â
and, need i remind you, that the delay of this red flag allowed for lando to get himself out of the bottom 5 and also knocked max and checo out of the qualifying session.Â
now might also be a good time to mention that max had a five place grid penalty for changing his power unit. so he would be starting all the way down in seventeenth.Â
and he was fucking pissed.Â
because remember. the 40 second delay of this red flag allowed Everyone to finish their flying lap Except for max and checo. so q2 ended with lando in first, followed by fernando, oscar, liam, alex, charles, esteban, george, lance, and yuki with valtteri, max, checo, carlos and pierre all getting eliminated.Â
also this is a very very valid safety complaint. it should not take that long for a red flag to be called when the car is not moving, had three clearly broken wheels and is also 15 feet from the track. all the worst accidents in f1 happen when there is a car that is already not moving from an accident or a problem and then it gets hit by another car. there have already been people who have died this way. it does not need to happen again.Â
aside from the bs flag call, checo was also pissed at red bull for entirely separate reasons and those reasons were because red bull had waited really long to go out for the final run which was part of the reason why they were not able to finish.Â
âcmon guys,â he said over radio. âwe gotta do that betterâŠif everyone is already waiting at the end of the pit lane why don't we go?âÂ
fans were outraged at this. one commented on instagram under a post about the teams qualifying positions âwhat is checo's garage doing? seriously???â and a red bull mechanic named greg commented underneath it saying âgiving him the same tools as max.â then, a second red bull mechanic named charlie commented responded to greg, saying âwhy you lying forâ
so. shit is certainly hitting the fan in more ways than one at red bull.Â
but back to qualifying.Â
there were no red bulls. which was odd. but we did have nine cars: both mclarens, both rbâs, and one aston, one mercedes, one williams, one ferrari and one alpine. what an interesting mix.Â
and it was about to get even more interesting because fernando alonso found a wall.Â
another red flag.Â
âred flag was much quicker that time,â crofty said. â19 seconds instead of 40.âÂ
and another wrecked car.
the standing order, with 6:59 left on the clock was lando, alex, oscar, esteban, george, charles, yuki, liam, fernando and lance.Â
and the rain could be coming back.Â
but there was good news for some people! like alex albon who was, according to crofty âon course for his highest startâ as he was currently sitting in p2 rather comfortably.Â
and in anticipation for the rain to re start, everyone had already queued up in the pit lane, despite the fact that the track had not yet been green flagged.Â
âitâs like the post office on a tuesday morning. you go down to get a box of stamps and they're already queuing up!â crofty said, making absolutely no sense.Â
thankfully there was no need to dwell on it because the track went green and they all spilled out again.Â
yuki went off and into the gravel, but was able to get out. so there was no red flag.Â
that came a few minutes later, for one very, very unfortunate alex albon.Â
yes, the same alex albon that had been on course to have his highest ever start. that alex albon.Â
and it was a big crash. he ping ponged right across the whole track like a very expensive and very broken ping pong ball.Â
he had no idea what happened either. over the radio he asked if the brakes failed.Â
and now williams had two very, incredibly broken cars to fix in just about three hours. remember that this team is held together by an excel spreadsheet.Â
three minutes, thirty one seconds to go.Â
and esteban ocon was seated at the front of the pit lane, waiting. behind him, the remaining six cars still left in the qualifying session from hell. remember this was all before ten am. at least two of them were running on only coffee and nutella.Â
âif i were him [esteban ocon], iâd select first gear and then wait ten seconds,â crofty said, speaking about how to impede lando and waste time, who was behind him, when coming out of the pit lane.Â
âoh youâre naughty,â karun said. then he went on a rant about how you physically cannot lie to the stewards because they will find out out. he apparently knew this from experience.Â
esteban did not impede lando and oscar upon exiting the pit lane. they all came out as they should.Â
âglad to see esteban found his first gear no problem and is out on the track,â crofty said. â[this is] quite the day in the championship battle.âÂ
and that it really was. five red flags, seven cars still standing, max verstappen starting p17, lando finally starting to really close the gap to him in the championship, qualifying at 7:30am on a sunday, race in three hours, rain, back end of a triple header, no oneâs been home in a month, and everyone was awake at 4am.Â
still, lando managed to improve his time, staying on provisional pole. oscar locked up and didn't finish his lap, he stayed p3.Â
liam lawson was gaining. he went second.Â
he was then replaced by yuki. for second.Â
then esteban ocon pulled out a third, splitting the two racing bulls.
lando extended his pole lap a second time.Â
and then george pulled out a p2.Â
charles unfortunately did not get in on the p2 fun. he stayed 6th.
and so. 1 hour and 45 minutes and five red flags later, with only barely 3.5 hours to the race. we finally had the starting order of the 2024 brazil gp.
p1: lando norris
p2: george russell
p3: yuki tsnuoda
p4: esteban ocon
p5: liam lawson
p6: charles leclerc
p7: alex albon
p8: oscar piastri
p9: fernando alonso
p10: lance stroll
p11: valtteri bottas
p12: checo perez
p13: carlos sainz
p14: pierre gasly
p15: lewis hamiltonÂ
p16: ollie bearmanÂ
p17: max verstappen
p18: franco colapinto
p19: nico hulkenberg
p20: zhou guanyu
one person wasnât satisfied with their position and that was charles leclerc.Â
âthat's p6â his race engineer told him over the radio.Â
âthat's fucking shitâ charles said.
the top three were definitely pleased though.
âa lot going on today,â lando said, accurately. âa little surprised.â
âreally pleased to be lining up p2,â george said. âi loved it [coming in early] to be honest. maybe this is the format for sunday morning.â
âvery tricky,â yuki said. âcertainly enjoyed it. feels much better than yesterday, good pace.â
yuki also ran into all of his mechanics in victory.
and we got this hilarious picture.Â
and i know what you're thinking. did everyone manage to repair their cars in time for the race?Â
yes. everyone except for alex albon, that is, who had to withdraw from the race due to significant damage.
what? that was not what you were thinking?Â
oh. you want to know if lewis got to drive sennas 1990 mclaren??Â
yeah! he did! before the race! and he did it no handed, in the rain. not to be biased here, but that's my fucking seven time world champion.
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and. finally. without any further ado. the race. or more accurately, the drivers parade.Â
charles was standing with pierre and then Yanked his had away from him so that he could shake hands with max. they seemingly developed somehow even more of a soldiers bond here, having a weird unspoken agreement that they were going to stop mclaren at whatever costs, because honestly what else could these two be yapping about, looking like they were teammates? especially when max was one minor inconvenience away from burning down the entire paddock?
meanwhile george and alex were causing all kinds of problems, completely oblivious to the scheming going on around them
and that about sums up the drivers parade.Â
onwards.Â
to the race.Â
it was still slightly raining when the cars all pulled off for their formation lap. and unfortunately that was where the chaos began.Â
with lance stroll going off during the formation lap. he then turned out of it and got himself stranded in the gravel after boinking into the wall and was effectively stuck.Â
and so there was an aborted start. some drivers, the several at the front, started to go around the track again, but their was confusion from others (like max) if aborted start meant that they did go around again or if they just sat on the grid and waited for the mechanics to come back out. in any case, everyone ended up going around again.Â
in the end, it ended up being that lando, the polesitter, was not supposed to go around again. and he did. and a lot of people followed him around. and no one knew if anyone (like his engineer) told him to go around again or he just did it on his own. he was still noted for going, and the whole mess was going to get brought up to the stewards later.Â
because what were they supposed to do in that instance? penalize everyone?Â
âyet another reason why im glad im not a steward,â karun said.
one thing was for sure and that was that lance definitely should buy his mechanics dinner that night as an apology because they had worked very hard to fix his car only for him to bin it again. (though the car had been in several pieces not too long again and there was a chance something was not connected correctly, he did say later that the car had felt pretty bad to dive in the formation lap)Â
this isnt even the first time that a car hasnt completed the formation lap in brazil. just last year charles leclerc crashed on the formation lap due to steering failure.Â
once they all arrived back on the grid after formation lap 2 the mechanics came back out and started rechecking the cars and etc while they waited for lanceâs car to get cleared. and the mercedes mechanics made a sneaky little adjustment to the tire pressure, hoping that no one would notice. unfortunately, they noticed.Â
onto formation lap 3! and thank god! everyone made it this time!
so with 18 cars and a rainy race ahead, lights went out and away they went into lap 1.
george was able to hold onto the lead!Â
and at the end of the first lap (which everyone blessedly survived) we had the following order: george, lando, yuki, esteban, charles, liam, oscar, fernando, pierre, lewis, max, franco, ollie, valtteri, nico, guanyu and checo.
that's right. max made up seven places. seven. and lewis had made up five. they were coming. max especially
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checo meanwhile had briefly gone spin, hence why he was now down in last place.Â
max passed lewis for 10th, already back into the points by lap 2.
george took the fastest lap on lap 3, already leading by 1.5 seconds. lando took it from him on lap 4. there was no DRS due to the rain, so lando was going to have to pass george the old fashioned style.Â
ollie bearman briefly went off the track after a small incident with franco, but he was able to rejoin.
and max passed pierre for 9th on lap 5
and then was up to 8th on lap 6 after passing fernando
meanwhile, along with lando, george, yuki and liam were all also noted for the starting procedure infringement at the beginning of the race. they would have to go with lando to the stewards after the race to hear their fate. meaning that no matter what the outcome of the race was, there was still a chance that they could get slammed with penalties after, so who knew if the real winners would in fact be the winners.Â
max, who had followed the rules for the starting procedure, took fastest lap on lap 7 as he started to close the gap to oscar in p7.
lando had started to eat into georgeâs lead a little, and george was now only .8 seconds ahead.Â
and the stewards noted the incident between ollie and franco. ollie received a 10 second penalty for causing a collision. which didn't really make a lot of sense to people as franco didn't really even have any damage.
max was declared to be the fastest man on track, faster than george, as he still zoomed up to the back of oscar.Â
meanwhile, lewisâs car had started bouncing, but george seemed unaffected as he took the fastest lap again on lap 10.Â
max passed oscar on lap 10, now in 7th. âhe came from so far back,â oscar said, entirely not expecting it.Â
âmax has tremendous confidence,â karun said.
and might i remind you all that it is RAINING
and then he passed liam for 6th on lap 11. unsurprisingly, liam was more compliant with max passing him than he had been with checo passing him in mexico). he was only 2.5 seconds behind charles, who was in p5. he had already made up 11 places in 11 laps in the pouring freaking rain.
lewis was not having as good luck. he went off the track and then got passed by franco.Â
âif i was haas iâd be annoyed with the penalty,â the announcers said, referring to ollies 5 second penalty. ânothing is wrong with that williams.â
by lap 15 there was a four way battle brewing for third. yuki, esteban, charles and max. who again i will remind you was 17th a mere 15 laps ago. this performance was starting to put even his 2016 brazil rampage to shame.Â
lewis was still not doing nearly as well, he tried to pass franco and failed.Â
lando was still in second behind george on lap 17 and said that he was struggling to overtake and that they were slow on the straights.Â
and to top it all off. the rain was set to get heavier in 15 minutes time.Â
charles, meanwhile, was managing to keep max behind. maybe he had brushed up on his skills since yesterday when max had called him out during the sprint for making so many mistakes over the radio.Â
no one had boxed yet. and the rain was starting to come down a little heavier. âgetting slippery with these worn tires in the wetâ nico said on lap 18.Â
and now as we know, its a crapshoot at best figuring out when to box for tires when its not raining. all that gets compounded into a fuckshoot when its raining. because it its expected to rain more soon, you'd want to put on new tires closer to then so that you have a better chance at clearing the water. plus theres always a chance it could get red flagged and then you could get a free pit stop. so the teams needed to get to the point with the big rain and then box for tires and hope that that was the right choice and that no one went off before then.
lando was back to gaining on george on lap 18
and ollie passed lewis for 14th
hamilton was clearly struggling in the mercedes, but george was leading? so was it a lewis problem? was it a car problem?? no one knew
max, meanwhile, was still under a second behind charles, no drs, on lap 20. charles had managed to hold him up for 9 laps and counting, which was a true feat when you remember how many places he has already made up.Â
âcarâs not driveable mate,â lewis said on lap 21. âlocking up, bouncing everywhere.â apparently the mercedes had some kind of a brake problem, but george was managing it just fine. he was still leading.Â
on lap 22 max tried to pass charles
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charles, clearly, did not let him
âthat was charles leclers knowing exactly where max was going to go and defending it a long way out!â karun said.
âhe was squeezing me!â max complained. âhe didnât leave a carâs width!âÂ
no one else seemed to have this view though because the stewards did not note the incident.Â
carlos was seemingly having some kind of car problem as he stopped behind ollie and lewis after going off the track briefly.Â
and this was all looking like it might be a good time for some new tires.Â
by lap 24, with heavier rain rolling in any minute, here were the standings:
george, lando, yuki, esteban, charles, max, liam, oscar, pierre, fernando, nico, ollie, lewis, franco, carlos, checo, valtteri, and guanyu.
the drivers had to make the call for the tires to go to the wets, according to the announcers. its something that the driver has to feel, not really the team, because the driver is the one in the car.Â
charles pitted for inters on lap 25.
not full wets, which was interesting (wets have more groves on them, inters have less, and they were about to have a shit load of rain)
lando asked to box to overtake george on lap 26. mclaren wanted him to stay out, despite his protests that he wanted to box for new tires. so he stayed out.Â
liam lawson meanwhile went off the track due to contact with oscar. he came back on in 9th.
nico hulkenberg pitted for inters on lap 26
lando was half a second behind george on lap 27
and apparently those inters didn't work too well for nico hulkenberg because he went off track and managed to get stranded on some banking.
a virtual safety car was called on lap 28, though not before esteban ocon managed to pass yuki for third.
again, who knew why it took them so long to call the safety car.Â
many people decided to pit.Â
oscar, fernando, lewis, ollie, carlos and checo.
and at this point, mercedes was finally reported for adjusting their tire pressure on the grid, which is not allowed! and also very bad news for george should he win the race because usually that behavior results in a disqualification and i don't think that george could handle another dsq after winning this season.
nico hulkenberg, meanwhile, was able to get back on the track
and the virtual safety car ended.
right as george and lando went to pit. which was incredibly unlucky
prior to this, george came on the radio to say that he thought that it was now red flag conditions. and he was probably correct. Â
âi think this is going to go red mate,â he said on lap 28. âthis should go red. we cant keep a car on the road like this. theres going to be big crashes. theres a big puddle through 4 and 13. there will be a crash there. i think stay out. it should go red.â and that would be good because then george could get his free pit stop and also maintain the lead of the race.Â
âunderstood, understood,â his engineer said. âso box, box.â
âi think, no, its going to go red,â george repeated.Â
âbox box. box, box. box, box. we need to box,â his engineer said. and so george had no choice but to box.Â
someone who didn't box was esteban ocon. he chose to stay out and with both lando and george pitting he was now leading the race on lap 29.
liam lawson and yuki tsnuoda pitted.Â
and after all the pit stops, we had:
esteban, max, pierre, george, lando, yuki, charles, oscar, fernando, valtteri, lewis, carlos, checo, ollie, franco, guanyu and nico.
âafter a truly awful season,â crofty said. âalpine is 1 and 3.â that they were. somehow. maybe it would stay that way.Â
and after all that. lando finally managed to pass george. but only for fourth, not for first.Â
and the safety car was deployed for rain.
so now no one could pass anyone.Â
esteban ocon had a 7 second lead on max verstappen.Â
and franco colapinto took this opportunity to pit for new inters.Â
oscar got a 10 second penalty for causing that collision a way long time ago with liam lawson.
and merc were still under investigation for the tire pressure thing.
and then all the others were still under investigation for the start procedure mishap as well.Â
at this point, max had gained 15 places. pierre had gained 10.Â
and behind the safety car they all pootled along. esteban, max, pierre, lando, george, yuki, charles, oscar, fernando, liam, lewis, valtteri, carlos, checo, ollie, franco, zhou and nico
that was, until franco had a huge crash.
and once again, there was the return of the red flag.Â
so now williams had crashed three whole times during the weekend. remember, they have no money and hardly any parts. and the mechanics were distressed beyond belief. Â
lando hopped on radio, annoyed with the mclaren strategy error because now everyone at the front (two alpines and max) would get free tires and he would not have the opportunity to get back to the front after they pitted.Â
george on the other handâŠ.
âso, red flag, red flag,â his engineer said.Â
âfuck!â george cursed. âi fucking said it! shouldve stayed out!â
yuki got a pep talk immediately after getting out of the car from team principal laurentÂ
and oscar jumped out of his car and immediately apologized to liam lawson for the incident.
âtheres a proper variety bag of pick and mix penalties that need investigating,â crofty said.Â
including nico hulkenberg who was being investigated for restarting his race after getting assistance from the marshalls pushing him back onto the track
and the results were in. he got a black flag. meaning he fucked up so bad he was disqualified. he was out. and it was the first black flag in 17 years. team haas was really doing it different this year. cause remember kevin got the first race ban in 12 years this season as well.
and ted just happened to watch nico get told this. he felt very awkward about it.
âi cannot watch this anymore, itâs too depressing,â ted said, turning away.
it was then announced that the race would be restarted as a rolling start. in 10 minutes.Â
max sprinted down the pitlane. meanwhile george and lewis peacefully scootered. they might still get disqualified for the tire pressure. they didn't seem to care.
george even stopped to get his boots cleaned as he stepped into the car (which yes i know is a thing cause they were wet with water but it looked so funny to see the mechanic wiping his feet like he was a princess)
and alpine, as we know, would be starting 1 and 3. they had not been in the top 5 all season at all whatsoever.Â
george did not like that there would be a rolling start. âthatâs more dangerous than a standing start,â he said over the radio.Â
and carlos thought that they needed 2 or three laps behind the safety car to decide. cause remember it is still very much raining.
but it was officially a rolling start. in six minutes. a rolling start meaning that they wouldnt line up on the grid, theyâd go out and do a slow lap and then just zoom! go!
carlos had a problem with his tires as they pulled out onto the track. âricky,â he said. âthese are not new inters. which ones are these? âŠ.hello?â ghosted by his own team.
and they went racing
zhou and bearman ended up in the grass pretty quickly, but they were able to get back on.
lando also went off and came back on just ahead of george. george took the position back.
and charles briefly went off.Â
on lap 34 esteban was still leading and had managed to stay 1.5 seconds ahead of max
hamilton overtook alonso for ninth.
ollie went spin spin spin into the barriers on lap 37. he was able to get going again but he had boinked his front wing. which had already been replaced during the red flag.
and yuki suddenly didn't have pace anymore because he was down in 8th. and getting hunted down by lewis.
ollie went off again. âinterlagos is really testing him,â crofty said. yeah no shit. prior to this race he had only driven the track once in a video game (not even the sim!) and he has no experience with f1 cars in the wet, much less this much wet.
on lap 39 esteban ocon was still leading by 2.8 seconds now.
and then carlos ended up in the barriers. no red flag, just a safety car.Â
he was okay. but he didn't get out of the car. it then became clear that he was trying to get the car out of the barriers before getting out. and thent here was a tractor on track. with a safety car. in the rain. cause that's safe and totally didn't happen at all during the fatal 2015 japanese gp.
it was at this point that they realized that most people who had gone off track had done so because they had gone over the white lines. and remember, the track had just been resurfaced. and despite the anti slip paint, they were still slipping. hm.
also, the last time that alpine had gotten a double podium was back when they were lotus with kimi raikkonen and romain grosjean in 2009 (?)
and, because this race wasn't already interesting enough, there was potential for more rain at the end of the race.Â
the safety car ended and they all went racing again on lap 43. ocon, verstappen, gasly, russell, norris, leclerc, piastri, tsnuoda, hamilton, alonso, lawson, perez, bottas, zhou, and bearman. the remaining 15 cars.
and max finally managed to get in the lead. all the way up for 17th place at the grand prix from absolute weather hell.Â
lando went off! dropping all the way down to 7th!
meanwhile liam passed fernando for 9th
and fernando went off the track, triggering a brief yellow flag.
max was already 1.5 seconds ahead of ocon. doing what he does best and making a gap. no one had ever won from 17th before at brazil either
and he took the fastest lap too, on lap 45
so our new order was:Â
max, esteban, pierre, charles, george, oscar, lando, yuki, liam, checo, lewis, ollie, valtteri, guanyu and fernandoÂ
mclaren popped on the radio with some infamous papaya rules and told oscar and lando to swap positions, so now oscar was in 7th and lando was in 6th, minimizing the damage to the gap that lando had just managed to close in the drivers championship very very minutely.Â
charles was noted for rejoining unsafely
and max took another fastest lap on lap 48
âmassively impressed with the alpineâs pace in these conditions,â karun said.Â
the last time that two french drivers finished on a podium was in 1997 in spain
on lap 50 checo and liam lawson started to battle for ninth. the commentators brought up the ever present talks that checo might not be in f1 next year.Â
oscar briefly went off the track, but managed to stay ahead of yuki, who was chasing him down.
and lando, despite the swap, was still quite stuck behind charles, despite having more pace. and we had already seen charles keep max behind for many many laps, so there was no doubt that he would continue to fight with lando. he and max were low key now teammates, after all
and yet, there still might be more rain
checo was still trying to pass liam lawson. he was still failing.Â
fifteen laps to go (finally)
max was still leading esteban, pierre, george, charles, lando, oscar, yuki, liam, checo, lewis, ollie, valtteri, guanyu and fernando on lap 55
and checo still could not pass liam
max had an 8 second lead
and even if the race ended up getting red flagged and not resumed for rain, everyone would get full points because the race was more than 75% complete
checo and liam had a minor incident. it was noted. âhe drove into the side of me!â liam complained
on lap 57 ted popped on to give his Insignificant and Unnoticed Award of the Day âto fernando alonso, he was 20 seconds down and now hes cut it down and is going to overtake zhou.âÂ
 max took yet another fastest lap, he was now 10 seconds ahead of ocon
âhes never changed one iota since he came in,â crofty said about max. âsometimes when you get penalized for the same thing over and over you do need to change.â though honestly, max was proving that he really didn't need to change, because he went balls to the wall with confidence unlike any other, and was leading a race he had started in 17th by 10 seconds. in the rain.
and george had managed to get within a second to pierre gasly
if pierre could hold onto third, alpine could jump from 9th to 6th in the constructors championship. which was estimated to be a difference of 50 million dollars in prize money.
lando was told over the radio to go close to leclerc. âi am!â lando said. âwhat do you think im doing?âÂ
by lap 63 max was still leading. this time by 13 seconds.
max was set to get 18 points more than lando at this race, and that was before any start penalties that lando might get awarded.Â
and he took another fastest lap
on lap 66 max was leading esteban, pierre, george, charles, lando, oscar, yuki, liam, lewis, checo, ollie, valtteri, fernando and zhou
âlooking like he [max] will be a 4x world champion and hold off the threat of mclaren,â crofty said.
and then, fernando alonsoâs radio crackled to life.Â
âi will finish this race for the mechanics, they did a very good job today,â fernando said. âbut my back hurts so much, there is so much bouncing. this is not normal.â and he did sound very in pain saying that. this re brought up concerns about the porpoising on the track. lewis had complained about it earlier and its been at no other track this year, meaning that it must be a track thing. meaning further that the track was probably resurfaced badly. because this is not normal. and yes, fernandos been having a terrible time during the triple header. hes been sick, he was in the hospital, he missed media day. this is still not normal though and cant be attributed to that.
lap 68. nearly to the end now. and max was leading by 18 seconds.Â
âheâs got more god given talent in a finger than some drivers every have,â karun said,
and meanwhile his teammate was down in 11th, trying to pass lewis for 10th. and failing.
last lap! finally!
and max won by 19 seconds! and he broke the record for most consecutive days leading a championship, breaking the record previously set by michael schumacher. and made it from 17th to first in the rain, despite all odds, in a car that barely worked, no drs, just spite and rage and pure talent. a true world champion
one by one, everyone else crossed the line
p2: esteban ocon
p3: pierre gaslu
p4: george russell
p5: charles leclerc
p6: lando norris
p7: oscar piastri
p8: yuki tsunoda
p9: liam lawson
p10: lewis hamilton
p11: checo perez
p12: ollie bearman
p13: valtteri bottas
p14: fernano alonos
p15: zhou guanyu
âbrilliant for alpine today, disastrous for mclaren,â crofty said
max, predictably, was absolutely thrilled saying that it was "SIMPLY LOVELY"
he sprinted to his mechanics, screaming and celebrating everywhere. he kissed kelly. he did not kiss christian.Â
this was only the 5th time, in this history of formula 1. 1125 races. that a race had been won from 17th or lower.Â
alpine was also thrilled.
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Â
the funniest part was esteba oconâs radio, where they asked him âdid you think we were going to be here?â and he said âfunnily enough, no!â
ruben barichello did the post race interviews.Â
max said that he âstayed out of trouble, made the right calls.â he had 17 fastest laps. which you can watch here.
and you can watch all of his overtakes here.
esteban was also thrilled. âwhat a day that was after a difficult season! very happy to be on the podium!â they didn't know that the car would perform this well in the wet.Â
and pierre was equally as excited. âits incredibly for the whole teamâŠin these conditions everything was possible. im absolutely buzzing right nowâŠ.would have been easy to just give up but we never give up.âÂ
because lets remember where alpine started at the beginning of the season. heaviest car on the grid. and also the slowest. and now, here they were, with a double podium. and scoring the most points out of any team at the brazilian gp (35) Â
alpine even made a little graphic, reminding everyone of this:
also, id like to remind you, that pierre and esteban don't really get along. they used to be friends and now theyre not for complex reasons, and they were so overcome by the emotion of their double podium that they effectively ended the french civil war
the cooldown room was quite excitatory. never had we ever seen a podium where everyone was so insanely happy to be there. max said in the cooldown room to esteban that "You were fast. You were so fast I was happy to settle for second."
and of course. we got our dutch national anthem. she was back ladies and gents! she was back!
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and we had the goofiest looking podium selfie
esteban and pierre dropped their champagne bottles down to their mechanics. they celebrated. they were on top of the world.
prior to today, esteban had 5 points. today he scored 18.
âred bull might feel a bit more back in the game, but they still need 2 drivers,â crofty said. âmclaren are leading by some 46 points.âÂ
max though, now had a 62 point lead on lando.
and so lets see what our favorite dynamic duo, james hinchcliffe and will buxton, had to say about all of this in the post race show.
âi don't know what we were missing,â james said. âwe had everything.â and he was right.
starting off with the fact that max absolutely showed who was boss and now lando has to score 21 points every weekend in order to beat him in the drivers championship. prior to this weekend max hadnt been within 20 seconds of the winner at all in the last ten races. and today he won by almost 20.
and alpine hadnt finished in the top 8 all season!
âi take my hat off to themâ will said. âthey were 19th and 20th in bahrain, their car was overweight, there was no hope and they got their heads down and they got it done.âÂ
then we were joined by yuki and liam lawson.
âit was like floating around!â yuki said about the conditions.
âi nearly crashed probably 10 times,â liam said. âi came into the pitlane and i tried to stop nad i wasn't stopping. crazy race.âÂ
the two of them said that they just didn't have good luck today and got stuck behind others in dirty air. âshame pierre got p3 and they overtook us in the championship,â yuki said. âbut we keep going.â
then they examined the start. lando, george and yuki all went for the second formation lap. esteban ocon asked over the radio if he was supposed to say where he was and the tea, said yes. but then they eventually told him to go. james said that this was not great and someone from the team should have reminded the drivers of the procedure.Â
lando, george, yuki and liam were all going to see the stewards about the start.
then they moved on to discussing lando. âlando did not have his day when max showed his absolute best,â will said.Â
lando said in his own interview that he was âjust unlucky with the vsc pit. just that's life sometimes, not talent, just luckâŠ.still made a couple of mistakes in the end, little unfortunateâŠ.4th was the best anyone who boxed could do.â which, its unclear what hes really talking about here. if hes saying max just had good luck or if he had bad luck. in any case, insane to call a run from 17th to first just luck and not talent. and will buxton agreed.
âverstappen proved once again that he is the best in this sport. to beat the best you need to be better than the best.â and today lando wasn't.
james was in agreement with will, saying that mclaren did make some bad calls and also that max has a habit of putting his car where it doesnt deserve to be
first lando lost to george, then the safety car pit, then his mistakes on track, then he lost position, then he swapped positions and still couldn't get past charles. it was âenough mistakes that it does come down to his driving,â will said. âmax was ruthless today. there was no drs and he [still] found it.âÂ
âdoesnt take many mistakes to lose to maxâ james added.
mclaren also posted one of the strangest post race videos ive ever seen. usually theyre like somewhere in the paddock or whatever. this week they were in what appeared to be a weird dark closet, with lando and oscar only half in frame. oscar sitting on a desk and lando sitting in a spinny chair next to andrea. and it vaguely looked like they were all being held hostage. oscar aso said that âlando has one sock on inside out and that sums up our weekend.â
then they moved on to mercedes.Â
âmy take is that iv we stayed out we would have been at the front,â george said. âi was pretty angry at the time cause i wanted to say outâ because he was confident despite the conditions and thought it would get red flagged.Â
by comparison âlewis hamilton looked like he was having a horror show today in the first half,â will said.Â
âhes been unsettled with the race car,â james said. âhis highlight was before the race even started,â as in driving sennas car. and it was.Â
lewis had this to say on instagram about the whole thing
âGrateful for the team and the engineers, we did our best out there but it was a hard race throughout in really tough conditions. This couldâve easily been a weekend to forget but the energy and passion from the fans have made it memorable for me. I still canât put into words how it felt to drive Ayrton Sennaâs car. To share that with this crowd means everything to me. Thank you Brazil for the support and the love. I feel it, even on days like this, and I send it back to you đ§đ·đ«¶đŸâ
checo, they said âwas having a good comeback drive, but then that incident with lawson threw him off.âÂ
and ollie âequipped himself pretty well.â he said that it was a âtough raceâŠfinished p12, quite close to the pointsâŠreally tough day, learned a lot that's for sureâŠracing in these conditions the water is quite rare and valuable.âÂ
will was disappointed in the stewards decision with his 10 second penalty. and they gave him two penalty points as well.Â
will tried to also look on the bright side for sauber by saying they could have gotten their first points.Â
james was unimpressed by this take.
âiâm trying to out a spin on it, i just want them to get one point this season!â will said.Â
they then moved to feranndo alonso, commenting on the amount of pain that he was in at the end. âvery 2022,â james said. âhavent heard that in awhile, especially with the wetâ so it was definitely the track surface itself.Â
there was also a clip of fernando getting out of the car post race where he almost needed help from the mechanics.
and they were unimpressed with lance. âhe had the ability to get it onto the black and he drove it into the gravel.â
and nico, to them, very obviously got disqualified because he had help from the marshals, something he should have known would happen.
they agreed that it was a tough day for williams. especially losing a place to alpine in the championship.
ferrari also have a âtough dayâŠat the end of two brilliant gpsâ and charles was âkind of in no mans land today.âÂ
james agreed. he said they âjust never had that sparkâŠ.salvage what you can kind of weekend.â
âall good things just come to an end,â james said, realistically.Â
also on the not having a great day list was oscar. though he thought his penalty was deserved. âit was tricky,â he said. âjust trying to stay on track was difficult at some pointsâÂ
they also spoke with oliver oakes, the alpine team principal. âbig result today,â he said. âwe were confident [staying out] was the right chouse but we werent sure [about other peoples choices to stay out]. today is a bug result, doesnt chage what we are doingâŠ.gotta stay humble and keep pushing.âÂ
and alpine were definitely humble about their win
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but they also hula hooped in the trophy
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âi just want to say so many words but i need to calm down first,â pierre said. âunbelieveable, its historical for the teamâŠ.its been difficult..at the end of the day we never give upâŠno one thought one alpine could make it onto the podium this year and we made it twoâŠthere is so much to say but from p13 to p3 im so happy.âÂ
and esteban said âi don't know ig we are in reality right now it this is just a dreamâŠmy alarm rang this morning at 4:30 and we had no ideaâŠ.[ive kind of been] thinking when is my rime going to come, if we all had the same carâŠthe cars they level out in some tracks.â
and finally, we had max. âI was very frustrated in qualifying, but tried to use it as motivation in the raceâŠ.made all the right calls againâŠwas hoping for two points so this is amazing.â he was also asked how driven he was and he said âwe had moments, but after that quali where i knew we'd be fast, i nearly destroyed the entire garage. i was barely able to hold myself in. but i started the race very driven. i think i'm the best when i driven, i don't show it an awful lot, but usually yes.â
he was also asked about lando and he said that âif you look a few hours ago it was the other way aroundâŠthree hard races to go, we need to make no mistakes.âÂ
so turns out, after all that, maxâs quote from earlier in the weekend was correct. he is a three time world champion and he doesnt need to change how he drives.Â
this though was too much for the british media to handle and they didn't bother to show up to the press conference. which max called them out on.
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in the end, no one ended up getting penalties from the start and mercedes did not get disqualified. mercedes got fined 5000 euros for each car. and the stewards agreed that "The gate to access the grid was not immediately opened. The FIA accepted that given this short notice it was extremely difficult if not impossible for the teams to follow the procedure prescribed in the technical directive"
which meant. this was our current championship standings.Â
for the drivers
max verstappen: 393
lando norris: 331
charles leclerc: 307
oscar piastri: 262
carlos sainz: 244
george russell: 192
lewis hamilton: 190
checo perez: 151
fernando alonso: 62
nico hulkenberg: 31
yuki tsunoda: 28
pierre gasly: 26
lance stroll: 24
esteban ocon: 23
kevin magnussen: 14
alex albon: 12
daniel ricciardo: 12
ollie bearman: 7
franco colapinto: 5
liam lawson: 4
zhou guanyu: 0
logan sergeant: 0
valtteri bottas: 0
and the constructors
mcalren: 593
ferrari: 557
red bull: 544
mercedes: 382
aston martin: 86
alpine: 49
haas: 46
rb: 44
williams: 17
stake: 0
âfun to watch it all, cool to watch it all, but at the end of the day you have to congratulate max verstappen for another championship win,â james said. âby far most dominating performance of the year and one of the most ever.âÂ
âwe leave you with one message resonating louder than ever,â will said, staring directly into the camera. âmess with the bull, you get the horns. we will see you in las vegas.â
the 2024 formula 1 silly season and drama master post, part 2 (part 1 here)
Hello and welcome to ah fucking fuck auto caps fuck fuck fuck how do i turn off auto caps AHA there we go okay. take 2
hello and welcome to the great and very insane formula 1 2024 season drama post, part 2. if you are new here or are just looking for part one (which contains the previous 16 (?) races, the off season, pre season testing and everything else, that can be found HERE. (a word to the wise: open it in a browser, not the app, and preferably on a computer to avoid crashing. its fucking long).Â
what the hell is formula 1? car go fast. fastest cars in the world zoom around tracks at top speeds of over 300kph, piloted by the top 20 drivers in the world. it might not sound dramatic, but oh man. you will Not be disappointed. this post focuses on the drama, the insanity, the sheer what the hell how is this a serious sport. no legitimately. we've just about seen it all this year. grindr, dogs, watersports, ice cream brands, its all here.
the point of this post? to educate, to catalog the insane drama, and to just have a good time. people like to gatekeep this sport, there is also a lot happening. i try to make it easy to understand. again, probably best to start at the beginning of the post because it does a pretty good job of explaining things, which i began way back in january, and can be found HERE (again, shes long, be careful)
and, as usual, if you do not want to see this post EVER AGAIN, block the tag #saph explains silly season 2024
and a second caution, i assume this post will be getting long as well. including this one we have minimum 9 updates left!
anyway, those of you who have been following along the whole time, welcome back! i know we got a little delayed. and i know weâre on a new post, so lets just briefly take a second for me to explain what the fuck happened. first i had an anatomy test, second i work 2 jobs with fuck ass hours, third tumblr decided to stop letting me look at any of my drafts, fourth tumblr support ghosted me about the drafts issue and the post was half saving half not so i just decided fuck it, were going with post 2, electric boogaloo, and fifth, i decided to start typing this instead in a google docs so. many changes. if you're new here i am usually more on top of this.
but here we are. were back on street circuits. weâre in baku, azerbaijan, for the start of the last third of the season. 8 races remain, world championship titles are still within grasp of multiple people. the drama is dramaing. and today is september 22, 2024 and lets fucking go.Â
first and foremost, on account of the fact that this post is late (again, see above), were going to have to do a bit of a speed run. if you're new here, i promise that this is not representative of my normal dedication to the update post. and for those asking, yeah, ill probably compile it somewhere better than a tumblr post after its all said and done, but we don't have time for that now.Â
what we do have time for is the Off Week (and like some of the media stuff). and it was filled with silliness:Â
george russell decided to wear what can only be described as slightly ugly yellow short shorts with his taylor swift shirt that he got at the eras tour. this was baffling for several reasons, the main reason being that i don't think the internet knew that he was capable of wearing a graphic t shirt
fernando alonso got his aston martin valkyrie finally. in case you are unfamiliar, a valkyrie i think is the worlds fastest street legal car. he posted tweets about this that made it seem like he wanted to fuck the car. hilariously, the car broke down an hour later.
we also had the very thrilling conclusion to grill the grid. oscar won and he somehow managed to look more pleased about his grill the grid win than his first race victory.Â
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nico rosberg went to the green awards and he wore a fantastically insane teal blue suit. yes i know hes not a current driver. but you all like hearing about him so ask and you shall receive. unfornunately i cant find a picture of it though
and also not a current driver is mick schumacher, but my roommate asked me to include that he was seen on his girlfriends instagram being bad at golf. like. exceptionally bad at golf. like he hit a tree 20 feet in front of him.
also playing golf was lando norris. except he managed to look like try bolton from high school musical 2.
he also talked about the world driver championship with his friend max fewtrell while they were playing golf. unfortunately i lost this link in the sea of technical difficulties, but the gist of it was that he was saying that there is still hope for him to beat max in the championship (hes about 60 points behind right now). lando doesnt usually talk about the championship because he doesnt want news outlets to paint him as âdesperateâ so this was interesting
charles leclerc had an insane off week. first he rear ended someone in monaco. then he spoke at a yacht conference. he was not scheduled to speak at said yacht conference, he was there doing something else and they were like hey you're cool people know you, heres a microphone. he alsp ended up on a weather channel while promoting a karting event he was doing for the jules bianchi foundation (his god father, the one who died during the f1 race in japan 2014). he also changed his instagram pop and re centered it because some random tiktoker told him it matched his aesthetic better.
oscar piastri posted a photo of himself sitting in the cockpit of a plane and then promptly deleted it. because he posted it on 9/11. for anyone who doesnt know what that is, that was when some terrorists hijacked commercial planes and few them into the world trade centers in nyc and the pentagon in washington dc
max verstappen also posted a plane pic with himself and lando norris, but he did not delete it.
we also had the return of daniel ricciardoâs jpg instagram account, which is kinda like a finsta for photos that hes taken. i think lando started this a few years ago.Â
heading into the race week we certainly got a weird ass batch of pr. including but not limited to:
lewis hamilton was back on top and slaying in the fit game. as was yuki.Â
lewis hamilton also exposed george russell as listening to katy perry pre race. katy perry and taylor swift (this was after he claimed that he liked listening to old school rap music.) though, lewis then started singing wrecking ball???? confusing vibes all around
george was not off the hook yet tho because some intern definitely make him say skidibidi toilet or whatever the thing is idk, i might be gen z but im not insufferable, okay? actually george in baku was just all kinds of unhinged
george and alex also got up to something, what it is no one knows but it is clearly something
max pulled up to the paddock de aged about 10 years. picture one is of him in baku in 2015 (i believe he was 17) and picture 2 is this year. no i am not kidding.Â
and franco walked into the paddock telling everyone about argentinian mate (which is a drink, not a friend)
and max shoved a microphone out of the way so everyone could gossip
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then of course, we had some slightly more relevant drama
haas announced that ollie would be replacing kevin at baku. in case you forgot, kevin magnussen received a total of 12 penalty points over the season so far, which means he gets one race ban. how did he get the points? well he was mostly wreaking havoc on everyone else so that his teammate, nico hulkenberg, could drag his car into the points. lets all remember the time in saudi arabia where he managed to get 20 seconds of penalties by basically driving like a mad man just to make sure that nico could keep his position after he pit stopped. anyway, nico was kind of pissed about the race ban situation and said âmaybe the guidelines for F1 penalties need to be reviewed as the stewards âwant to get involvedâ no matter the contact.â
in any case though, k mags was out. and ollie was in. weâve seen ollie before. notably he subbed in for carlos sainz at the saudi arabia gp when carlos had appendicitis. he managed to get points as well. since then, he has been announced as a haas driver for 2025 and is now subbing in for k mags (haas, later in the week called him a super sub. clearly no gen z person read that over.) he can do this because ferrari has a haas engine so they share reserve drivers.
adrian newey finally got employed. i know! i can hardly believe it either! but he did! and youll never guess where!Â
ferrari? no that would be too obvious.Â
mercedes? nah
williams? no too much of a shit show
aston martin? ding ding ding! just the right amount of shit show!Â
that is right. newey is going to aston for 2025.Â
apparently he was offered a âgood packageâ according to himself, which i assume means pay and also the fact that lawrence stroll made him a shareholder? stakeholder? whatever its called. in the team itself. basically he has a lot of power.Â
he said that he always wanted to work with fernando and lewis. and he couldn't do both. and aston had a better package than ferrari.Â
fernando looked positively evil during all the announcement pictures. and called the team "definitely the team of the future" and for those of you who don't know, fernando is positively evil. hes just been stuck in a shit box and we havent seen very much of him, but man does he know how to evilly slut it up. so that will be fun to see.
by contrast, people said that lance was not excited enough. and well. lance 1. has resting bitch face and 2. never really looks excited about anything. also he lives in a world where take your child to work day somehow became his job. (his dad owns the team).
lewis hamilton was asked what he thought about adrian not going to ferrari, and here's what he had to say:
"i feel like, while I have mentioned before that it would be an honor to work with adrian, i have been privileged to work with two championship winning teams that didnt have adrian."
mclaren announced pato o ward would do FP1 in mexico. who is pato o ward? hes one of mclarenâs indycar drivers and one of the f1 reserve drivers. he is incredibly charming and definitely runs his own social media as seen here:
mclaren Also claim they figured out who their number 2 driver is and they claim its oscar. i say they claim because the statements were a lot more complex than that. essentially, according to andrea stella, the priority is to the team first, then lando and then oscar. so they didn't outright say that oscar is the number 2 driver and i am willing to bet real money that this is because mr mark webber, oscars manager, has something in oscars contract that prevents him from being a number 2 driver. this is of course because mark webber was one of the most infamous number 2 drivers in f1 history to none other than menace war criminal sebastian vettel, who in their time as teammates, managed to win 4 back to back world champions. or, top to bottom if you're mrs darbus from high school musical.Â
lando was asked about this and he said that yes, the team does support him. though he would not expect oscar to give up a win for him and that it is more complex behind the scenes. i suppose we will see if there are any papaya rules coming out this weekendâŠ.
and oscar said "i think the main point is its not purely just going to be me pulling over for lando every single race, because thats how none of us, including lando, wont want to go racing, if we feel that someone has done a much better job on a weekend, whichever way it is, we want that person to be rewarded."
max verstappen commented on the mclaren situation as well. which was funny mostly because red bull has one of the most defined number 1 and number 2 drivers of any team. he said "you look at it form oscar's perspective, he is closer to lando than lando to me. they have to deal with that."
and allow me to put on a tin foil hat as we are about to talk about the future of the red bull seat. because all i have to offer here is a baseball hat and a red bull can.Â
a long time ago we talked about the red bull cans. the ones that red bull makes to promote f1. at the end of last season red bull put max and checo on the red bull can. this season at the start it was just max on the red bull can. well. now checo has reappeared on the cans too. and i will tell you what i think this means. it means that checo is not getting swapped this season, which was a possibility for awhile.Â
but! there is more!Â
daniel ricciardo made an instagram post this week. and it was very interesting. but most interestingly he was wearing a red bull hat.
which he does occasionally, no big deal really. he did race for the for several years, he technically does currently. BUT then he showed up TO THE PADDOCK wearing the red bull hat.
which is Big Interesting. usually you show up in a statement outfit or wearing the team kit. and daniel is not a red bull racing driver. he is a visa cashapp racing bulls driver. they might be owned by red bull but they are Not the same team. so why the red bull hat. in the paddock. well, the rumor is that hes taking checos seat for 2025. and the rumor is that this will be announced before mexico. so checo can have a proper send off.Â
and with that. the baku lore.Â
theres a lot that has happened at baku. as i said its a street circuit. and i think its the fastest street circuit. but over the years theres been some notable events.Â
such as the great kimi raikkonen radio for gloves and steering wheel:
instagram
they gave mini kimi this week gloves and steering wheel in honor of that
the max and daniel crash in 2018 when they were running p1 and p2 respectfully
instagram
and of course. how could we forget. charlesâs infamous âi am stupidâ radio.
youtube
speaking of charles, he crashed again in fp1. not quite in the same spot, but nearly. he took a picture with the marshalls.Â
then in fp2 he rage quit, basically saying that the car sucks.Â
instagram
but he was back and better than ever in practice three because he managed to top the time charts. welcome back fuck ass ferrari.
some other teams definitely experienced the lows but not really the highs of baku during practice. like lance stroll who came on the radio to say âthis is not a carâ (good thing they have adrian newey now, right?Â
franco colapinto also cut his ear before practice on the neck strengthener stretcher thing that they all use and the team wanted to give him stitches but he was like no no no i need to be in the car in about 5 minutes im not doing that. so he jammed on his helmet and jumped in the car. he also crashed and when he went to the medical center he took off his helmet and there was blood everywhere and they were like no no no you cannot race! and he was like no! this is not from the crash! and then explained it and they let him do qualifying.Â
also im pretty sure? ollie bearman crashed? in practice? but frankly i don't have time to google it so whos to say.Â
but alas. qualifying.Â
i know i know this is kind of a shitty update. i promise ill go all out in singapore. i PROMISE.Â
so as i said. its a street circuit. high speed. 90 degree corners. and also windy as hell. we also had the dynamic duo of karun and harry in the commentary box.Â
max led the first practice, george led the second and i think charles led the third. or some order like that.Â
slipstream here is almost essential (slipstream: going behind another car to reduce the wind drag so you can go faster)Â
charles has the last three pole positions (first in qualifying) here in baku, but he has never won. by comparison, red bull have never had pole here but they have won.Â
and franco has never been to baku before.Â
i think that's all the exposition that we need here.Â
q1 started with max complaining about his car. âthe car is jumping around like crazy on the rear axleâ he said. despite this he was sitting in p3.Â
the mid field battle thoughâŠ.the mid field battle was heating the hell up. mostly because none other than franco colapinto, who if you will remember, has never been to baku before, had split the two ferraris. he was in third for the moment, .109 seconds behind carlos sainz and .159 seconds ahead of charles leclerc. we still had a lot of qualifying left to go, so this was probably not going to stay, but it was still insane. he was pushing insanely hard, nearly kissing the walls. clearly he had learned from his crash in practice.Â
the two mclarens waited until the very end of q1 to do their final flying push lap, and oscar made it through, but tragedy struck for lando.Â
lando was in the middle of his last flying lap, time was ticking down, and there was a Very Brief yellow flag on the track. now, according to rules, you cannot complete your flying lap if there is a yellow flag. so lando pitted and was stuck down in 17th and out of qualifying. this would be the first time that he was out in q1 since vegas last year (which if i remember correctly was also not his fault)Â
now though, of course nothing is ever that cut and dry. people thought that there had been a mis showing of a flag. yellow flag means that a car is stopped on track, white flag means that a car is going slowly on the track. and people thought that there had been a yellow flag shown when it was actually supposed to be a white flag (if there had been a white flag then lando would have been able to keep doing his flying lap) lando himself said that he had no idea what people were talking about because there is a light on the steering wheel that lights up when flags are called and he had a big yellow light. so it was clearly a yellow flag.Â
if you're concerned about lando being able to pull it out of the bag, id like to point you in the direction of the mexican gp last year where lando qualified 17th and finished 5th. on a track that was hard to overtake on. he can be absolutely insane when he wants to be. worry not gentle reader.Â
in any case. also out in q1 was daniel ricciardo, valtteri bottas, zhou guanyu and esteban ocon.
and notably, williams, who was on fucking fire this weekend as we already saw, finished q1 with alex albon in second (ahead of oscar) and franco colapinto in 8th. pierre gasly had somehow managed to also get into 4th. and nico hulkenberg was in 7th with ollie bearman in 13th. i told you the mid field battle was heating the hell up.Â
q2. everyone zoomed straight out of the gate. they didn't want to get lando norrisâd. but, speaking of that, if lando managed to get no points in the race and charles managed to win, charles would overtake lando in the drivers championship. mark webber himself told this to charles, who was absolutely baffled.Â
in any case, charles was kinda suffering right now and that was because he was not getting slipstream from carlos to make his lap faster. meanwhile, carlos seemed to be actively trying to give charles the slipstream because he came on radio to say âhe keeps missing the towâÂ
and amazingly, franco colapinto was 4 tenths AHEAD of alex albon. alex albon who had not been unqualified by his teammate once since the start of 2023. ex red bull driver alex albon. that alex albon.Â
max topped the times in q2, followed immediately by charles. insanely, fernando alonso managed to drag the aston martin to fifth. and franco was right behind him in 6th. by comparison alex albon was in 10th.Â
and from q2 we lost ollie bearman, yuki tsunoda (who has never qualified lower than 8th in baku), pierre gasly, nico hulkenberg and lance stroll. so yes, ollie bearman managed to outqualify nico hulkenberg. this is ollies second ever f1 race.Â
steaming on forward to q3.Â
we had, for review, in q3 the following:Â
both ferraris, both red bulls, both mercedes, both WILLIAMS (has not happened since vegas 2023), plus fernando alonso and oscar piastri.Â
right out the gate it was wild.Â
âred bull! theyve re found their mojo! or have they!â karun said. red bull were in 5th and 6th and not entirely sucking for the moment.Â
everyone did one flyer and then came out at the end for a second flyer.Â
here were the standings:Â
charles, carlos, oscar, george, checo, max, lewis, alex, franco, fernando
and everyone was making it to the line and all was going smooth until-
wait a second what is that
could it be! alex albon! with the air box fan still on his car! surely not!!!
oh but it was! and harry and karun were like oh wow so unfortunate for williams tisk tisk
meanwhile ted jumped on the radio to Loudly announce to everyone that this was insane and if i have time here i will put the rant he ranted cause it was Fantastic.
and what do you know i have time
so we had 3 minutes left qualifying and everyone was pulling out of the pits for their last flyer when oscar hopped on the radio to say
"the williams still has the air box fan in"
"oh what an error! disaster for williams!" karun and harry said. they speculated if the marshalls could get it or if the session needed to be red flagged. but alex threw the fan off the car.
and then they asked "ted have you ever seen that before?" and ted did not hold back:
"ITS A MASSIVE YELLOW FAN HOW COULD YOU MISS IT???!!! HOW COULD THE MECHANICS MISS IT???? I CANT BELIVE THEY WOULD MAKE SUCH A MISTAKE DOWN AT WILLIAMS! SUCH AN EXPERIENCED BUNCH OF GUYS AND GIRLS! WHAT IS GOING ON AT WILLIAMS OPERATIONALLY? HOW COULD YOU SEND A CAR OUT LIKE THAT?"
alex, obviously, got fined for an unsafe release 5k euros. he also had to throw the fan off to the side and got slightly covered in dry ice. he did not get to the a second flying lap.Â
franco did tho!
and here were out qualifying results:Â
p1: charles p2: oscar p3: carlos p4: checo p5: george p6: max p7: lewis p8: fernando p9: franco p10: alex p11: ollie p12: yuki p13: pierre p14: nico p15: lance p16: daniel p17: lando p18: valtteri p19: zhou p20: estebanÂ
oh ho ho but we werent done yet. because pierre gasly got disqualified from qualifying. for failing fuel flow regulations. and lewis was going to have to start from the pit lane for changing his power unit.Â
everyone, and by everyone i mean oscar max and checo, pretty much said that charles was going to get pole no matter what, they knew this coming in and the best they were trying for was second
onto the race.Â
notably, this is considered a checo track. this was one of the three races that max did not win last year. because checo won it. its a track that he does well on, evidenced by the fact that he qualified above max in qualifying. so people were expecting big things from him.
and so, we head into lap 1.
charles managed to hang onto the lead. checo passed carlos straight out of the gate for third and max managed to pass george to take fifth. lando had managed to get ahead of nico and up into 13th. notably, franco held onto 8th and ollie was able to hold onto tenth.Â
someone who was not doing well was lance stroll, who came on the radio saying that he had a puncture. this was from contact with yuki. lance had to pit for fresh tires and was pretty immediately thrown to the back of the grid.Â
by lap 2 lando had managed to get past daniel and was in 12th, he was trying to get past yuki next, which he managed by lap 3. yuki also lost a spot to nico.Â
also slaying in the mclaren was oscar, who took fastest lap. then charles took fastest lap.
and lewis hamilton, who had started from the pit lane, was up to 16th. already. somehow. though he was displeased with the tires, sayig that âthis tire is pretty badâ over the radio.Â
yuki meanwhile was clearly having a problem because he had started going very very slowly. thought the pit wall said that he had no problems. this would later turn out to be false but we will indulge them for the time being.Â
franco was STILL ahead of alex albon on lap 6. STILL.Â
lando on lap 8 managed to push his way into points positions, overtaking ollie bearman for 10th. though this was where things were about to slow down for him because in front of him were alex, franco and fernando, who were all very close together and would be hard to get past.Â
george was back in bad luck hell as a plastic bag entered his airbox. will he ever catch a break.Â
on lap 11 nico hulkenberg finally caught up with ollie bearman and passed him for 11th.Â
and maxâs car was not working. to potentially no oneâs surprise. âi have zero bite in the carâ he said. and this was probably true because checo was a whole 6.5 seconds ahead of him. insane gap.Â
several pit stops later that i will not detail out because we simply do not have the time, alex albon ended up in 4th and lando ended up in fifth. and oscar was about to get undercut by checo.Â
âmojo seems to be back for checo perezâ harry said, correctly.Â
mojo was back for him indeed. and now he was right behind lando.Â
and if you will recall, according to mclaren themselves, priority at mclaren is the team first, then oscar, then lando. but oscar was ahead of lando. so what did mclaren do?Â
they asked lando do hold up perez, but not compromise his own race.Â
remever a long time ago when i said mclaren wouldn't have any internal drama this season? man how i was wrong.
lando managed to hold up perez for around a lap or two before he got past. this was crucial because this was during when oscar was in the pits.Â
thanks to lando and the power of the papaya rules teamwork, oscar ended up coming out in 4th, only .706s ahead of checo.Â
mclaren are working together everyone! mclaren are working together!
meanwhile, turns out that yuki did indeed have problems because he retired on lap 17 with a hole in his sidepod from the contact with lance on lap 1. this was now two races in a row where he had had to retire for reasons out of his control.Â
several more people pitted. and eventually charles was back out in front, oscar was in p2. until he wasn't. no, he didn't dnf. he overtook charles! he was in p1! he popped out of nowhere! nowhere being 2 car lengths back and just flooring it to spring around charles like a little silly slinky! karun called it a âgood, fair and robust defense,â which sounds like its descibing notes in wine. but this was not wine. this was the baku gp. and we were only half done.Â
ollie bearman was defending against lewis hamilton, holding on tightly to 14th place.Â
charles was still behind oscar and he could not get past, despite the fact that he was still very much in spitting distance. âthey are pushing like crazy or they have more grip than usâ he said.Â
carlos got past both lando and alex albon and was up into 4th
this brought max up behind lando. max was on 11 lap old tires and lando was on 24 lap old tires. but lando still defended like hell and managed to hold onto sixth. max was 0.632 seconds behind lando on lap 25 when he said that âmy brakes are not working.â this was hardly a surprise. max has hated the car since china.
also experiencing technical difficulties was sir lewis hamilton. he was stuck down in 14th and was first told to do âeverything you can do to get the surface temp downâ of the tires. he said âim tryingâ then several laps later on lap 29 he came on the radio to say âare you seeing how i have to drive this thing?â âyes,â bono, his engineer said. âquite effective though.âÂ
max was still half a second behind lando. mclaren faked a pit stop call over the radio to get max to pit. he did not.Â
but, george russell did manage to pass him. which was ânot good for maxâs world champion aspirations.â
this was also when ted very bafflingly said that âif i had a sofa in the pit lane i would be jumping up and down on itâ im not sure what that was in response to.Â
meanwhile, ollie was still holding off sir lewis hamilton. and charles was trying to get oscar to pit again by lying over the radio. it was not working.Â
lando did a pit stop finally and came out a whole 15 second behind max. he was hoping to catch max by the end of the race. but it might be tight. lets go last lap lando.Â
âlando, imagine andrea on your shoulder saying âzero wheel spinâ in every exit,â landoâs race engineer said. if you're confused, everyone else was too.Â
10 laps to go and here were the order of affairs:
oscar
+.449s charles +1.865s checo +2.989s carlos +16.530s george +1.909s max +11.535s lando +9.715s fernando +2.589s alex +2.451s nico +4.667s franco +1.590s lewis +1.261s ollie +1.791s pierre +9.205s daniel +23.919s esteban +.789s lance +3.862s valtteri +3.631s guanyuÂ
lando was determined. he took fastest lap on lap 43 and was 8.8s behind max
at this point, the leaders were starting to lap the cars in the back. âthe back markers are starting to come up,â checoâs engineer said to him. âits going to get messy.â
âhold onto your hats and if you don't have one go get one and hold onto itâ harry said. harry would turn out to be correct.Â
we had the top 3 all running very close to eachother, that was oscar, charles and checo and âwelcome to the party carlos sainz!â who was now 1.2 seconds behind checo in the four way battle for the lead.
definitely not leading was lance stroll, who retired on lap 47 with a brake problem.Â
oscar managed to pull ahead of charles by 1.5 seconds, finally knocking him out of DRS range. so now it was a three way battle for second. and charles had âno rear tires. no rear tires at all.âÂ
and, just like i said he would, lando managed to pass max on lap 49. he was closing the gap slowly in the championship.Â
âverstappenâs day goes from bad to worse,â harry said. because lando still had fastest lap, so he would score 3 more points than max. which is important if lando wants to beat max in the championship (though i think hes still like 60 points behind)
meanwhile! franco managed to pass nico hulkenberg for 10th! he was in the points!!!! at his second race!!!Â
but this was short lived because there was a crash! a big smackeroo! between carlos and checo!! checo was mad, carlos didn't know what happened.Â
what happened was that carlos was trying to pass checo but checo did not move over. it was deemed an equal fault accident. both of them were utterly confused at what happened and apparently spent 20 minutes in the medical center being utterly lost and aparently saying that sometimes this sport sucks. and! contrary to what several people said! checo did not bang on carlosâs helmet after the crash.Â
the crash actually caused chef's dad to have a heart attack. he is stable now.
and well. this clip of george from the post qualifying interviews definitely didnt age well:
instagram
but! since we were a matter of a few laps from the end, this meant that the rest of the race was finished under a virtual safety car.Â
which meantÂ
OSCAR PIASTRI WINS THE AZERBAIJAN GP
and george inherited p3!Â
and on his own merit too! no safety cars, no team orders, no weird shit!Â
âyes!â he whispered over the radio.Â
he almost fell getting out of the car, then gave us all the âone momentâ hand gesture before properly celebrating.Â
instagram
he also got driver of the day!Â
(this was marginally better than george russell, who said over the radio âi cant get any rubber (to pick up on his tires) all im getting is leavesâ)
gunther steiner also hosted the post race interviews. which was interesting.Â
george said that the most difficult part of the race was âdriving full gas into a wall of carbon fiber on the penultimate lapâŠthe vsc should have come out soonerâÂ
charles bashed ferrari because they didn't do any high fuel runs in practice.Â
oscar was entirely pleased. âi managed to overtake and hold onto it for the next 35 laps..one of the better races of my career.â and honestly, oscar winning a race straight after mclaren basically announcing that he was their number 2 driver is nothing short of hilarious.
and! mclaren was now leading the constructors championship by 20 points! for the first time in ten years!!!!
the top three had a moment outside of the car that was filled with baffled:Â
and oscar's engineer tom got to stand on the podium with him. he usually takes a selfie with oscar after each race he podiums at, but he was too excited to so george took this picture for them
(george also aparently demomished oscar in a game of uno on the plane, immediately humbling him)
george also shielded himself from the champagne on the podium
the cooldown room reacted to the crash in a very straight forward manner:
instagram
and very quickly cause its midnight and the singapore gp starts in 8 hours, the post race, speed ran:Â
-mark webber told off laura winter for thinking that oscar didn't have good tire management
-alex albon was âsuper happy, that's a lot of points for usâ (williams finished in 7th and 8th). he cut his own interview short when ollie bearman arrived, saying âI can go, im happy to goâ and then waving comically.Â
-williams was so pleased with this result they blasted everyone with champagne. and they overtook alpine in the constructors championship! this was also their best race finish all season
-(and a quick note, if youre going to really blame logan for being that shit of a driver here, please remember that the car he was driving was several rounds of upgrades behind alex's pretty much the entire time he was driving it)
-ollie became the first driver to ever score points in his first two races for two different constructors because the double dnf pushed him up to 10th place. he said that there was not much difference between the haas and the ferrari, the ferrari was just red
-franco continued to charm everyone and flirt with the reporters.Â
-they interviewed george and lewis and the camera had to be adjusted for george's height. it was comical and resulted in my favorite edit so far of the season (sound on)
instagram
-lando looked pleased and happy for once. he said about holding off checo that âi didn't hold him up i just had to cool my tires a little.â he was delighted to be leading the constructors for the first time in ten years and he defended alex albon saying âi struggled to get past alex for a while, which is common, alex doesnt make mistakes.â he also ratted on max for going to fast during the VSC and said âi didn't complain, facts were stated.â and to sum it all up he said that âim executing things well, iâm very quickâŠiâm not going to be the happiest guy, but i am never the happiest guyâŠ.car is performing well everywhereâŠsome red cars behind us seem to be our biggest competitors right nowâÂ
-by comparison george insulted all of pirelli. the tire people. âpretty infuriating that it (the pace) changes this so muchâŠ.its black magic, people who make the tires don't understand the tiresâŠ..for 20 laps we had a car not worthy of points and for 20 laps we had a car fighting for victory and the only difference is the tires.âÂ
-lewis was notably upset after the race and walked through the paddock with his helmet on, not wanting to talk to anyone. but he did talk to franco and ollie and congratulate them on a job well done defending against him and racing against him. franco even fangirled over this on his instagram.Â
-charles was clearly upset with ferrari. he was so upset he posted a thirst trap.
-and oscar. oscar was very happy this afternoon. and his mom was there! she doesnt usually come cause it scares her, but nicole was there today!Â
-mclaren celebrated with a hell of a lot of champagne. both oscarâs wina and landoâs insane recovery, and the fact that they were leading the championship. red bull have been dethroned, at least for now.Â
-there was so much champagne that lando took off his socks to spray it. all seems well at mclaren.Â
-at least one thing is for sure, oscar had a better time here this weekend than last year when he got food poisoning and only ate four pieces of toast
and with that. we head into singapore. quite literally as it is starting in a few hours. again, i apologixe about this post. its a little sad, but the next one will be better. pinkly promise.Â
see you all soon!!!
#not a tag#from saph#saph explains silly season 2024#brazil gp 2024#it was insane it was wild and im glad im done writing this lol#THREE MORE LETS GO#Instagram#Youtube
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If it makes you feel better Im a huge c!tommy apologist but I still see the killing c!tubbos bees and burning down his house as canon like c!tommy is an asshole, I can admit that. Its always confused me how people refuse to see early events as un-canon especially when they impact the story or when they cherry pick like people will see c!dream in c!tommys walls as canon but won't see how c!tommy acted in that time as canon like a lot of people forgot c!tommy built sewers through c!georges and c!dreams home which further turned the greater smp against l'manberg.
[context]
I mean it doesn't make me feel that much better... Perhaps we should make an award for Tommy apologists who actually believe in canon? lol jk jk XD luv u <3 <3... For real though this is something that really frustrates me and after seeing a bunch of posts recently and looking at the dsmp wiki, while putting together the scavenger hunt, and noticing some huge errors, I am really close probably going to posting something regarding Tommy lore inaccuracy, especially relating to this early era of streams.
It's just so frustrating to see, like I can't even really give a good look at some people's analysis, argument, or opinion because I'm still stuck on the lore inaccuracy. Makes me want to pull my hair out, but to be fair, with the wiki being wrong, surely I can't blame people too much. But seriously am I the only one who actually watched these streams or what?! I don't understand, how can we be going around talking about disc duo, writing hundreds of words of fanfiction and analysis on them and not even recount something like the actual disc saga properly...
Over and over, like you said, things like Dream in Tommy's walls is brought up [clip], and yet no one ever talks about the context of that. Like it literally takes place during a scuffle shortly after they tried to blow him up in the nether. And I don't know about you, but people plotting to kill me seems like a fairly reasonable time to spy on them...
that and well... he just loves being in de walls apparently [clip] :)
And yea, the sewer is another good example, in fact that happens before L'manberg, they just don't realize until that stream where they are preparing for the war [clip] [clip]. But yea it definitely fuels George's anger for Tommy and his crew and by extension Dream. I still can't believe they did that. :( so rude. I mean look how cute he is building it.
#literslly so funny how I went looking for the stream where dream built the room and find him hiding in the walls lol... like this has to be#a hobby of his or something... lol just too perfect :)#dreblr#dsmp#c!dream#dsmpblr#no one does it like c!dream#dsmp lore#hello there#dishing up lore#c!discduo#c!disc duo#dream smp#I wanna set the lore record straight but also.... scared to invoke the innitor rage.... and trying to figure out how I do it the best to#inform the most people posssible...#.... confession - I watched waaaaaay too much lore again today and they will not haunt my dreams
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RANKING SBG SHIPS BECAUSE LOKI GAVE US ALL FREE WILL đŁđŁđŁđ„đ„đ„
Aidlyn/Ashden: good lord the chemistry. the 'he fell first but she fell harder' trope. the lil gestures by aiden. him annoying tf out of her but also becoming very caring when she's hurt. I'M SO CALM RN GUYS. and the fact that them ending up together is inevitable lmfao XD 9/10
Benlor: FUCKKK IM SERIOUSLY NOT OK THESE TWO ARE JUST SO PURE AND SWEET TO EACH OTHER. ESPECIALLY TAYLOR TOWARDS HIM, cuz he kinda suppresses his feelings and is a sad boi :( dw ben taylor's gonna make you feel happy again fosho lmao đ the lil blushing ben always does around taylor! her supporting his ideas even tho they flop! her helping him calm down from barron through music! her always cheering him up whenever he's gloomy! her being the first to thank him for opening up! THEY'RE LITERALLY THE DEFINITION OF SHE FELL FIRST BUT HE FELL HARDER! GOD IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM đđđ 10/10
Tylenol/Tylo: i never thought of the prospect of them together, but post tumblr i must say its interesting. not just them being the single ones in the team, but i like the way tyler defended logan against barron, and his general protective aura around logan. but then again tyler was kinda rude to logan in the start. but then again it gives nerd x jock vibes which to me r pretty cool 5/10
Tyden: LMAO the continuous saga of them pissing tf out of each other. it would be fuckin hilarious if they somehow end up together. but apart from the general hilarious bickering, there's not too much to it 5/10
Tayden: goddamn their friendship is so precious!! her painting his nails? her carrying him on his shoulders in dat one artwork?PURE BESTIE VIBES they just match each other's freak lmfao. 8/10
Logden: meh there are not any significant moments between these two. would definitely be cute, but i can't see it happening lol 2/10
Loglor/Taygan: no but why can i actually see this happening lol. the way theyre both so gentle around each other! then the way she was the first to help him when he got slashed by the phantom? and also the way she stood up for him when tyler was being rude? Cute! 6/10
Benlyn: ooh the two quiet people of the gang! they could work out really well bcoz they definitely understand each other's struggles with muteness and phantom hearing respectively. plus that panel of ben braiding ashlyn's hair was so cute lmao :> 7/10
Loglyn: AAA they have sm potential!!! before the events of yk the whole âšsAvAnNaHâš mess, i feel like they wouldve been each other's only existing acquaintance they may call friends (ik it's not canon but it's very plausible lol) 6/10
Benlo/Logben: theyd definitely be good together, it's just that my sbg memory is failing to recall any significant moments b/w them ;-; if y'all remember pls do tell 4/10
Tyben: what is with the hernandez siblings always ending up being bens biggest supporters lmao XD it's a cute dynamic honestly 5/10
Taylyn: now this is one freakin adorable ship TvT. the way taylor always had a slight pang of concern for a friendless lonely ashlyn when they were kids? and the way they quite frankly became besties after enduring all the phantom world shit? very sweet lmao 7/10
Tylyn/Ashler: i have been usurped into the tylyn propaganda by @tragedry honestly I DO NOT COMPLAIN. like holy fuck they're so enemies to lovers! them "loathing" each other, fighting for leadership, but then immediately becoming possibly the biggest protectors of each other in times of danger??? extremely wholesome lmao i love them smmm 9/10
SO THE TOP SHIPS ARE:
3. TAYDEN (the crack ship) đđ„đ„
2. tie b/w TYLYN and AIDLYN (the wholesome ships) đđđ„
1. BENLOR (THE PUREST SWEETEST MOST ADORABLE GOOFS EVERR I-) đ„șâ€đ„
#sbg#school bus graveyard#aidlyn#ashden#benlor#tayden#tyden#tyben#tylenol#tylo#logden#loglor#taygan#benlyn#loglyn#benlo#logben#taylyn#tylyn#ashler#sbg webtoon#school bus graveyard webtoon#sbg ships
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I need to hear about WLW Marbit plssss
OKAY IM AWAKE NOW.
So last night me and some mutuals were yapping up a storm because someone had mentioned how a highschool production had a female two-bit and how marbit went crazy and since we all know I'm literally insane over wlw marbit we started yapping.
I fear I wrote SO much but I hope yall enjoy this because it's just me yapping and probably doesn't make sense.
So I believe @girlishwhimsies had mentioned soft butch two-bit x fem marcia and I fear I have NOT stopped thinking about it. Like godddd imagine all the events that happened.
Like Marcia a girl who has dated a lot of guys just praying to feel some sort of feeling back first talking to two-bit who is by far the coolest fucking girl she's ever seen and realizing something was different about this girl. Marcia who had learned very quickly in life that things were very "black and white" and there are rules she has to follow to stay with her collective group. Despite knowing that she still give this girl her number in hopes of... something.
Then Bob dies and her focus turns to Cherry and her boyfriend who's she's always just convinced herself she's liked him even though he sort of treats her like shit.
Two-Bit who the jokester still in her group full of boys and just having a blast is so silly to me. She's still a amazing fighter who's just pretty much doing whatever she wants without a care in the world. Her constantly getting in trouble at school for wearing pants and shorts at school. Two who stayed behind in order to watch over Johnny and ponyboy is actually so important to me (I believe @brunetteairhead said this at some point âŒïž).
Two-Bit who has always seemed so brave and strong literally falling all over the place because of some soc girl who is prettier than anyone she's ever seen at the drive-in. She like tripping over herself trying to impress marcia because she's never met a soc girl like her before. She's quick-witted and confident and that takes two by surprise. And getting Marciaâs number was the highlight of her night. While walking home doubt settling and making her decide to toss the number assuming it was fake makes me so sick.
Then Johnny and pony run away and everything goes down from there. She see Marcia once in the week their two youngest are gone and it's at the police station. Marcia doesn't see her but two spots her almost immediately. Marcia is just staring off into space and the bag underneath her eyes are dark. Two was leaving after being questioned so they never got to talk again.
Then later that week two gets jumped. Marcia standing there with her back turned hurt her for more than any kick or punch she got from the socs pinning her down. Long after her torment two wasn't sure what she was going to do, she could barely walk let alone all the way to the curtis residence and that's when she sees someone coming towards her. Marcia coming back and helping Two and two finds herself in Marcia's house holding her side because it hurts like a bitch but she can't believe she's in Marcias house. The two of them practically losing it because they both sense there's something there but both know they can't act on it because Marcia still has a boyfriend and two still worried about her friends. (Marcia breaks things off with trip after this because she doesn't want to be with someone who thinks its okay to hurt others .)
Them meeting eachother after a few months post book and both of them just kicking their feet n shit because they are SO down right bad. Two-bit yapping to soda about marcia knowing she likes her so bad and Marcia yapping to Cherry about how two isn't like any boy she's ever met and how she really wants their friendship to be good and Cherry hesitantly pointing out how she thinks Marcia might want more than that and marcia freaking out because she knows that it's wrong to want to see herself with this girl. A girl who seems so impossibly strong and a girl who just seemed to understand her better than anyone she's ever known. She knows it's wrong but she can't find it in herself to care. She denys her feelings for awhile because she doesn't want to ruin everything she's worked so hard to build.
The two of them hanging out more and more until eventually they are hanging out at Marcias and two is allowing Marcia to paint her nails despite not necessarily caring too much about like having her nails being done etc but she can't find it in herself to say no to Marcia whenever she makes that face that looks like a puppy who just got kicked so she always agrees. Anyways the two of them are laughing and joking and Marcia like brushes a curl out of two-bit face and the both of them sort of freeze because they are so close together. Two-bit shockingly makes the first move and kisses Marcia (ofc with a bit of hesitation but Marcia meets her halfway) and the both of them just pull away both shocked that they just kissed.
Marcia in that moment does panic for a moment before realizing that she liked the kiss and that no kiss that she's ever shared with a boy ever felt like that. Part of her couldn't find it in her to care that this was "wrong." It felt right and she wanted more, she wanted to sit here and be happy with two.
Meanwhile two is panicking so bad because Marcia is just sitting there with this shocked expression and two-bit is frantically apologizing and trying so hard not to scream or cry she doesn't know herself bit then Marcia takes two-bits hands and tells her that it's alright and that she liked it which catches two completely off guard.
"Wait you did?"
"..yeah"
Anyways after that fact they just sort of just do not talk about it for the rest of the night because the both of them have no clue how to go about talking about what they are so they just wrap up their hangout and go about their week. Two-bit absolutely losing it the next day to soda and is practically screaming over how the kiss was and how she doesn't know what to do and marcia reluctantly yapping to cherry and cherry fully saying "I told you so" and marcia just going crazy because she wants to hold Two-bits hand and she wants to be able to kiss her again but not knowing if Two-Bit wants the same(she does) and they are just complete messes I fear.
ANYWAYS once they start dating they have sleep overs all the time. Two-bit will go to the curtis house and they immediately know she was at Marcias because her nails will be all nice and pretty and her hair will be all nicely braided and she is giving them the look of 'don't you dare talk about it'. Soda totally makes fun of her for it and they almost always end up fighting on the ground.
Anyways I have no clue if any of that makes sense but they've truly taken over my life I fear.
#the outsiders#the outsiders musical#the outsiders broadway#marcia the outsiders#marbit#two bit mathews#wlw marbit#GODDD i love them#i fear theyve taken over my mind its so bad#qpr server got me cooking so hard#qpr server this is ur fault ly tho#sodapop curtis#the outsiders headcanons#the outsiders fanfiction#ponyboy curtis#johnny cade
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I've been seeing quite a bit of posts about mischaracterisation, and I wanted to give my two cents on the topic. I should warn that my two cents really are two cents, meaning my opinion doesn't matter much, so if you disagree, that's completely fine, seeing as I am likely to be wrong.
In the year of our Lord 2024, methinks that we should as a fandom stop policing other peopleâs interpretations of the characters. This is because the storyline of the album is really vague, and there is no word-of-god confirmation about anything that happens in it. How can you interpret a character wrong if no interpretation of the album itself is really correct? Honestly, you could do so many things with the album that could change the characters. What if the "see how he laughs at you / seethe as he snarls at you" bit from TSE sees the H&M criticising the bits of the other's personality that they actually hate in themselves? "Oh, you thought they were listening? Now, don't be absurd" in Storm and a Spring can be Mind criticising the music industry or being frustrated about not getting through to Heart. You can make up what it was Heart and Mind disagreed over, whether they were friends at the start or enemies all the way through, and what Apathy entails and how long it lasted - all of these things could be changed and those changes could be used to explain how they act. We don't know what Heart and Mind's internal monologue sounds like - both of them may be filtering their thoughts as much or as little as you prefer, which could change their characters greatly [e.g. Mind could be much more hurt by the album's events than he lets on and be masking this hurt by anger or he could really be a cold and cynical machine who is pretending to be angered by the events of the album because he thinks that the best way to get through to Heart is by framing his thoughts in a way he understands, like anger. Or he really could just be angry, like he presents himself. idk im just pulling these three examples out of my ass].
Also, Soul doesn't actually appear much in the album at all, so I think you can interpret him however you want even freer than his counterparts. He might be frustrated by the events of the album, actually, if you take the "if not for you or for him, then please do it for me" in The Bidding, but he really may also be violent, if you take the fact that in The Soul Eclectic he goes directly to death threats and continues those death threats in The Bidding and Light. He could be a mix of both. He could be neither. Maybe he's violent because he's tired. You decide.
There's so many variables in CCCC that condemning one or the other interpretation seems wrong to me. Do whatever you want with them. When interpreting CCCC, what's important is to characterise them the way you enjoy them instead of what fandom tells you to characterise them as.
#chonny jash#i mean i guess there are a few extremes which are like are we listening to the same album#like heart being characterised as a soft uwu boy and acting like that outwardly#whereas in the album he deliberately tries to cause harm to mind#as he stated in light#but honestly if you really want him to act that way sometimes then im not the boss of you#i mean#he shot a guy#but#cw violence
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Me, reading ancient texts: why are they talking about beating their chests in grief so much?
Me, watching a video that gets just a lil too funny: *beats my chest like an empty ketchup bottle*
#is this relatable? idk#im seeing what happens if I actually post#specifically i mean ancient greek texts. like epics and junk#im not just sitting in a freshly discovered jungle temple reading their stuff and shitposting about it#and yeah this actually comes up a lot in them#i guess violent stimming is timeless?
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OkayâŠokay! I have so much to say and I need to get everything that I am feeling and thinking out because OMG
Pregnancy reveal/post by Sarah and John B?!? OMG YESSSSS. Also Pope in the comments being like; âthis is why he keeps canceling boys night.â I canât with them. I love them all, love all the little details and all the little dynamics.
POPE FINALLY GETTING ON COOKING WITH CLEOđ„łđŁïžđ„łđŁïž yesssss itâs happening. I was with my mans waiting for this. Also FOUR YEARS?!? Cleo wrong for that lmao and then dedicating it to the reader. I love our wife fr. Sheâs the best. Another detail I love is how close we are to Cleo and Pope. Love our besties, love our husband and wifeđđ©”𫶠Also John B and Cleo in the comments, fucking dead. Him not knowing the difference between a salt and pepper shaker. Brother what? Cleo please never but please do bring him in the kitchen đ a beautiful disaster, waiting to happen.
Readers post about seasonal depressionâŠtoo real đ and all her little comments right after I canât. Had me laughing harder and harder because it was so relatable. Then JJ coming to save the dayâŠ.STAWPđ
The instagram post. Calling JJ our knight in shining armor đ© him flirting in the comments with us. Also RAFE liking the post?!? I saw that. I saw that shit. I donât know who to like more or who Iâm rooting for. At this point neither, I canât choose. I WANT BOTH. âBoth. Both is good.â
Readers tweets about the Cooking with Cleo video is FANTASTIC. Letâs be honest though, all three of us know we ALREADY married. Lmao. We all together, legit love the friendship with Pope and Cleo so much I canât get enough and canât express it enough. Pope saying fake news when we say he loves us, that man just canât admit or say I love you. But itâs okay, heâs our bestie and our wifeâs husband.
READERS TEXTS WITH RAFE. donât get me startedâŠ.Im started. Him so clearly nervous and scared to scare us offđ and then us just fucking diving right in. The begging on the knees, I know heâs definitely gonna take that and RUN WITH IT. And I canât wait. I canât wait to see what he does with that. The whole conversation had be giggling and kicking my feet.
JJ AND THE READERSđźâđšđ€ now that DELIVERED!!!! Heâs so down bad, omg and I love it. I love him. LIKE I SAID. BOTH. You canât make us chose, you canât make reader chose. Damnđ his; âbreathing near you is the highlight of my day. I donât ever really care about what we are doing.â LIKE OMG, this is so beautiful and sweet and this had me blushing and giggling and kicking my feet. Then him outing himselfâ ïž 13yrs damn poor man, and thatâs a good question about his game đ that or we just blind asf.
THE SOS POST; the last post. This post. This Post. THIS. WAS. THE. POST. I was cackling so loud, giggling, everything!!!!! I reread it a million times because it was just beautiful. I have said it and Iâll say it again and forever and forever. POPE AND CLEO ARE THE BEST. I LOVE OUR BESTIES, OUR WIFEY AND HUSBAND. In actuality forget JJ and Rafe. GIVE ME CLEO AND POPEđ No, but Cleo springing over and leaving Pope in the dust is so funny I canât. And poor Pope being so confused until Cleo is like, âPiping tea babe.â AND THEN HIS GIF/MEME OF RUNNING??? Absolutely dead, had me cackling even louder. I canât explain how much I love Pope and Cleo, especially in this and as our besties. I canât get over this one, legit my favorite (slide? Picture? Story post? Idk) itâs legit my favorite and was absolutely amazing.
Thank you for not only sharing this but creating this. Itâs so amazing, and such a great and entertaining story. I love all the small little details you add to every part and all the little side stories and relationships that are involved in this. For example; John B jumping in the fight and helping defend not only his team but the reader. Topper seemingly always there and confused when reader and Rafe interact đ Rafe really needs to update this man on whatâs happening fr đ itâs all just beautiful. Also Rafe and JJ getting along just for reader and everyone literally being like, okay readerrrrr we see you and your power. My point is this is stunning and Iâm in love with it so much. Thank you đ«¶đđ„°
Kildare University- Sophomore Year: 8
Synopsis: A Social Media AU in which you find yourself at Kildare University along with your friends. Starting over at a new school shouldn't be difficult. Well, except for the fact that your ex-boyfriend is the quarterback, and you are the drum major. Add in a little bit of drama, a lot of friendship, an ex who can't seem to let you go, and a best friend who has been in love with you since you were kids and well? Welcome to KU!
Pairings: Past!Rafe x Reader, JJ x Reader, Rafe x Reader
Masterlist
Taglist:
@akobx @onelonelybitch @the-universe-and-karma @beeskisses @frankoceanluvr11 @ivy-34 @rafecameronsloverrrrr @k-k0129 @asyouwish-fromcabin3 @xoxo-ada @aariahnaa @strawberryforks @urbrunettebombshell @whatisoutside @spenceatiny18
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if ordan karris wanna complete that sentence does that mean he also likes us?
#i mean. the ordan part can control what sentence he wanna hijack right?#hmm#after seeing so much dialogue from his quote page i really wanna see the ordan part inside ordis actually has major impact in canon#and not just to roast parvos. i absolutely love that part but i hope i can see more than that#also makes me wonder how much details in his quote implies what would happen later in the game#like. idk how long ordis has been calling us the operator but i guess it's definitely before the second dream#and i also guess people would understand it as the operator of orbiter or something and not about#...that#yeah that kind of detail#does that count as a spoiler?#what am i talking about this whole post IS a spoiler#but i don't actually wanna tag my each and every post as spoiler tho#cephalon fragment has existed for years so i guess im just gonna... keep. not tagging that. yeah#warframe#warframe ordis#warframe ordan karris#my art
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Thinking about them in episode 2
Light and dark capes, walking through the undercity alone (especially after just losing people they cared about: Silco and Sky), finding someone who needs help, helping (any future consequences this will have aside for now) and then sitting with them (gaining a follower)
#yes i know viktor may not have actually helped him#im sure this new form will have bad consequences later#but im looking at this from a parallel perspective atm#AND these happen in the same episode. soooo#love to see it! very interested to know what happens next#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane spoilers#jinx#jinx arcane#viktor#viktor arcane#mettys posts#metty posts#they continue to drive me crazy#jinx and viktor#viktor and jinx
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I am. Offended. At how much this comic sways my emotions. Dawgs you have no clue how thrilled I am to see Sans Forgettable AU POST trauma for the first time.
I cant feel my heart.
I love his stupid sunglasses and stupid
stupid
hes so stupid I love him I love him and his brother I love the brothers i love the concept of brothers they are the definition of the concept of brothers
also im mad. the shirt hes wearing looks like Wingdingsâ dress shirt but opened. âčïž
while weâre here I might as well share my fanfic version of the first pages of Chapter 2
SO I THOUGHT LIKE just straight after the end of Chapter 1, Papyrus is like âill go inform everyone of our departure!â and before Flowey can say NO DONT TELL ANYONE- he walks in and the house is comedically hectic, Toriel greets Papyrus and asks if he wants to help with her baking and before he can answer Undyne swoops in holding him in a headlock, then Toriel scolds her and then Alphys shouts and the smoke alarms go off cause she just accidentally blew something up upstairs- FUN STUFF
In this hectic scene Flowey has been TRYING to get Papyrusâ attention but still lie low with everyone else- and eventually got it by shoving Papyrusâ face out of a window and closing the curtains around him-
âDonât tell Toriel weâre going to the Underground!â âwhy??â âCAUSE SHEâLL THINK ITS DANGEROUS AND WANT TO BRING EVERYONE ELSE!â
âwell why not?? thats a lovely idea!â
And this goes on- eventually Papyrus gets pulled back by Undyne to help with something and Sans appears like âso why are you guys going to the underground?â and floweys like FUCK!
Sans says heâs coming with unless Flowey says what theyre doing. The logic being, âwell if its dangerous then I donât want you guys going alone, and if its not dangerous then why arent you saying what it is?â. He also says heâll drop it if Flowey just says what- so Floweys honest and says that theyre gonna try and solve Papyrusâ memory problem. And Sans is like.
fuck.
Cause now he really does wanna come
but also he said he wouldnt-
IM SHAKING IM SO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENS CAUSE TELLING FROM THIS SCREENSHOT THATS CLEARLY NOT- also godamn thatd be impressive if I predict a whole scene/plot progression just by saying âhow would I write thisâŠâ
I should say what I think is gonna happen in more detail more often just in case that DOES happen cause id never let go of that. Permanent ego boost
Little sneak-peek as a thanks for the patience waiting for new pages aldjwknd
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