#im probably being dramatic but i need to get this point across

[alaskan-wallflower]

whoever sent me this block me right fucking now.

What do you think of Joyofsatan.org? They claim to follow the Greek Gods, they support abortion, they follow gay Pagan Gods and they’re the largest Pagan group in the world.

uh…

[sexilene]

jj x reader cockwarming!! ⋆˚𝜗𝜚˚⋆ #03 (sorry bout the spelling mistakes!)

jj often takes you with him when he goes fishing, he basically does all the work and you sit there flipping through a magazine or sunbathing. and just like all the other times, watching your boyfriend’s veins form his arms stand out as he lifts buckets of fish and what not, looking all manly. and sure he’d smell a little salty and his hands a little fishy but you couldn't care less, all you could focus on was the throb of your clit and the need to have your tired boyfriend’s dick inside you asap.

at some point he dramatically stretches and leans back on into the car seat, a joint held tightly to his pursed lips. you both are seated in the front of a dingy little truck you found for him at some junk yard car place, you had surprised him with it for his birth last year and though it needed some work jj was still entirely greatful.

jj inhales, his eyes closed while you’re seated sinked on top of him, your fingers tangle in messy blonde hair, his cock pulsating warming inside you.

“jay? please put it out…im so tired and i really wanna cum!” you whine, rocking your hips slightly. you pout and lay your cheek down onto his shoulder as he continues to hold you down with his hand on your hip. you too had been like this for about 30 minutes now, just cock warming him and you had tried to fuck yourself on his cock, but nothing seemed to work to ease the need for him to just slam you down on his dick.

“baby, how could you be tired, you literally did nothing the whole time hmm?” he coos, before inhaling again and then blowing out smoke from his nose.

“keep tellin ya, if you wanna cum, you jus’ gotta wait till papa j s’ready…” he speaks with a soft growl, squeezing the flesh of your hip. you whine again to get your point across, rocking your hips again against his. the wet sounds of your cunt and the feeling of your clenching pussy finally made him give in and help you out,

“gimme a sec baby cakes, i’m almost done” slurs, finishing off the joint and stubbing it out in the ashtray in the cup holder. he grabs your face to make you look at him, the strong grip on your jaw probably is going to leave a mark from his rings. he blows the last of the smoke out of his nose again and then pulls your face in to give you the sloppiest kiss.

“really wanna get fucked, really bad…” you pine, all these smells overwhelming your senses. the earthy saltiness of your boyfriend, the smell of his joint and the smell of your wetness…

“imma take care of you now, kay?” he smiles before his other hand finds your other hip, lifting you up effortlessly and then slamming into you from underneath. “iv’e gotchyou babe, just take it.” the force of that singular thrust has your eyes closing shut and your nails to dig into the skin of his neck.

your boyfriends cock hitting deep into your soaking cunt at a bruising pace, up and down up and down, against your sweet spot over and over again.

“like a pretty little sex doll you know that?- cept your warm…” he jokes,

your head lolls into the little spot under his jaw, drooling on his shoulder, your eyes clenched shut as you whine,

“don’t be funny right now! im- oh! you’re being mean…” the tight coil in your belly starts to snap as he continues to slam you down on his dick sloppily, your clit rubbing against his skin giving you little shockwaves of pleasure.

“m’sorry- fuck! love you, you know that….” he grunts, fucking up into you as you start to feel the way his cock starts to throb sending you over the edge. you squeal into jj’s mouth in an attempt to kiss him while you creamed all over his cock. he just continues to groan and fuck up into you through your orgasm, and eventually his.

after coming down from both your highs, you continue to sit there impaled on his dick, his hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. you try and sit up and move back to the passenger seat but jj hold you down on him and shushes you.

“no no angel, you wanted to cum that bad? were gonna keep goin till you can’t take it,”

[mariasont]

I'm so glad you love writing for bimbo reader x Hotch because i love READING them so much 💕

What about reader getting jealous a witness or unsub is flirting with Hotch? Kinda like how the prostitutes are always flirting with Reid but this time it's Hotch getting all awkward and reader misreading it and thinking he's interested back?

Love your stuff!

JEALOUSY, JEALOUSY - A.H

a/n: hi so im so glad you love bimbo reader 🫶🏼🫶🏼🫶🏼 that literally makes me so happy, thank you sm for requesting i hope you like that <3

masterlist

pairings: aaron hotchner x bimbo!assistant!reader

warnings: reader being jelly, kind of out of character for bimbo reader honestly, she’s also a little flustered in this fic which also feels out of character but i kind of like it idk lmk what yall think

wc: 1.2k

The space between her hand and Hotch's bicep was dangerously narrow. She was saying something--something that was way flirtier than the situation required. Matter of fact than any situation required. Your pink nails, the same shade as your favorite bubblegum lip gloss, dug into the flesh of your palm, your lips forming a tight line as you fought the green jealousy that bubbled up like champagne.

It was fine. You were fine.

Until it wasn't.

She flashed a smile at Hotch, one that was undeniably pretty which only served to make your blood boil a degree hotter.

She was stunning, black hair, red lips, perfect skin. You loved yourself, obviously, but it was not in your character to deny that this woman was gorgeous by nature and she was edgeding her chair closer to him.

"Thank you so much for your help today, Agent Hotchner." Her voice had climbed a few pitches in comparison than when she was talking privately with you. "Is it okay if I give you my number, just in case I think of anything else?"

"Of course." Hotch was smiling-- no beaming--at the woman, reaching into his pocket to grab his business card.

Your lashes fluttered up and down is disbelief, jealously rolling off of you in category nine waves. You folded your hands on top of your skirt, cleaning and unclenching until you started to lose feeling in your fingertips.

You're fine, just take a deep breath. Hotch was simply being polite. That's it. But the rationalized thoughts in your head did not match the quicksand feeling in your stomach.

Unfortunately for you, showing and expressing your feelings in an appropriate manner had always been a struggle. Articulating when things were bothering you was a foreign language to you. The other side to this was you had no logical reason to feel the way you did. He was your boss, and you were his assistant. He wasn't your boyfriend. But that fine distinction did nothing to dampen the primal impulse to reach across the desk and drag the woman by her hair. 

That was dramatic, really. It was unfair to project your ugly feelings onto her when in all honestly, in her position, you’d be doing the exact same.

As much as you loved your job and adored your boss, sometimes you wished you didn’t work for him so you could push the boundaries just a little bit when it came to flirting with him.

Thankfully, for the sake of your career, the woman gone before your rash instincts could manifest into action. You needed to get a grip and possibly go reapply your lipstick.

You spent the majority of the day, from that point, avoiding Hotch like the plague. You weren't quite equipped to sift through the emotional chaos brewing inside you, especially when your focus needed to be on getting your tasks done, not on who Hotch might be interested in. It didn't matter if he liked that woman. You could cope. Maybe.

When you did have to come into contact with him, you found yourself acting like a wounded animal. The sight of his face only served to replay that stupid smile he flashed at her. He was probably already in love, daydreaming about their shared life ahead. Their three kids, the white picket fence, maybe even a dog.

You flipped open your makeup mirror, dabbing powder on to your nose and forehead while mentally reminding yourself to pull it together and behave like the grown-up you were supposed to be.

No sooner had you left the bathroom had you crashed into something, legs betraying you as you lurched forward, nearly spiraling to the floor. Your hands shot out, closing around the nearest object which felt to be the lapels of a suit. 

Your gaze snapped into sharp focus. Yes, definitely the lapels of a suit, and not just any suit--It was Hotch's.

Fantastic.

You quickly retracted your hands, letting them hang limply by your sides as you took a cautious step backward.

His brows furrowed, lips tipping downward as he absently adjusted his watch. "You okay?"

"Peachy!”

That was too much.

You attempted to sidestep him, but he anticipated the move. His arm reached out with surprising speed, fastening around your wrist to keep you in place.

"Hey." It was funny how a single word in that deep voice of his was enough to make your heart beat a little faster. "You've been avoiding me all day. I don't want to pry, but if there's something I've done to upset you, I'd like to know so we can clear the air."

"What?" you responded too quickly, avoiding his gaze as your hand went to your neck. "Oh, no, no, it's not you, sir. I just... I think I might be catching a cold or something. Just feeling a bit woozy."

You were definitely coming down with something—it was a green, nasty disease that had your judgement in a clouded haze.

He smiled, making your heart go into overdrive. "You're a terrible liar."

"No idea what you mean." Your voice went up an octave too high. "But, um, there's a bunch of witnesses I need to follow up with. There's this one who was... really eager. Maybe she'd respond better to you?"

There was a pause before Hotch spoke, his voice low and certain. "I've seen many reactions from you, but jealousy? Is that what's happening here?"

You blinked rapidly, heat rising to your cheeks. "Jealous? That's... that's ridiculous."

"I'd like to think I know you better than that." He gave you a deadpan look. "You've been avoiding eye contact, you've been unusually quiet, and I didn't necessarily miss that look you gave her."

You swallowed hard, proving him right and looking anywhere but him as you fidgeted with the hem of your sleeve. 

"It's not... it's just, you know... I don't know, the smile you gave her, it seemed a bit unprofessional to me."

Your words tumbled out in a flustered rush, not capable of taking them back as you realized the absurdity of it all.

Hotch's eyes crinkled as he smiled. "Unprofessional? Did it look like I was flirting? Because that would be a first."

"No, I don't think you were flirting, not exactly." You should stop yourself while you're ahead. "But she was, and you didn't exactly shut it down."

Hotch's face was unreadable. "Honestly, I didn't even realize she was flirting with me. Even so, I'm curious—why would that bother you?"

"Well, I mean, I... It doesn't, not really. I just think we should all be focused, that's all," you managed, voice faltering as you tried to be convincing.

"I assure you, my focus is on all the right places," Hotch said, taking a step closer that almost felt invasive. His gaze dropped to your lips momentarily before snapping back up to your eyes.

"O-okay."

The closeness of him was sending your body into overdrive, the room suddenly feeling too small, his presence way too intense.

"And just for the record," Hotch said over his shoulder as he turned to leave. "If I were to flirt, trust me, it would be with someone who already had all my attention."

taglist: @hotchhner @khxna @readergf @sarcasm-and-stiles @edencherries @aurorsworld @princess76179 @malindacath @freyy253 @broadwaytraaaaash

[ventismacchiato]

O8 stuck with you — im on top (of you) !

scaramouche x gender neutral reader

The day you had been dreading was finally upon you.

“Stop looking so sad,” Yoimiya sighs as she looks over to where you were slumped on the floor of the recording studio you guys were in.

“My beautiful voice…mixed in with his,” you shuddered at the mere thought of his vocals sullying the album.

“Quit being so dramatic,” Lumine chastised, reaching over to get you off the floor. 

You look over to where Scara was similarly slumped on the floor, staring into the wall as his group members conversed around him. Looks like he wasn’t too into the idea of recording with you either.

“You guys ready?” Albedo asks, walking in carrying a stack of papers as he walks past you guys to the soundbooth. The young blonde had been one of the company’s producers since you’d debuted. He reminded you a mix between Kazuha and Xiao, quiet but managed to get his artistic vision across.

“You two,” Albedo gestures to you and Scara, “I was instructed to get you both done quickly before working on the group song.”

“Jean really slotted all this time and took into consideration how much Scaramouche and Yn bicker,” Fischl muses.

“What are we singing?” Scaramouche asks, flipping through the page of lyrics Albedo handed you both.

“A love song,” Albedo answers, hooking a pair of headphones onto his head, “Let’s just try it out and see what needs to be added, go on then.”

He gently pushes you into the recording booth as you both tug on your own pair of headphones.

You eye the lyrics as you tug the microphone closer to you, wincing at the implications behind the words.

The first few attempts were disastrous to say the least. Scaramouche kept criticizing your timing and you kept pointing out how he was overpowering the track. Albedo’s patience, which was unbelievably high if he worked with the likes of you, was wearing thin as you both argued over every line.

After a take that finally sounded decent Albedo gestures for you two to come out of the booth.

“Are we finally done?” Scara asks.

“That sounded pretty good to me,” Childe pipes up.

“If you guys had collaborated earlier we would be drowning in so much money right now,” Venti sighs dejectedly. 

“Almost,” Albedo answers, fingers flying over his keyboard, "I just need you both to moan,” Albedo deadpanned.

“What?” Scara slowly says, like he’s on the verge of strangling Albedo by the neck.

“Before you say anything just listen to this clip.”

You couldn’t even process anything before Albedo was hitting play and your gentle voice mixed with Scara’s came out of the speakers, followed by some harmonies by Aether and then Xiao that he’d added in later. It all sounded good as they all harmonized together, but even you could feel that something was missing.

“So, you need us to do what ?”

“Moan, so I can use it as backup vocals,” Albedo hummed, twirling a pen with his fingers, seeming nonchalant about what he was asking of them.

“Fuck no,” Scara says, jutting a finger at you, “Why do I have to moan on the same song as them.”

“I don’t want to either,” you huff as your members erupt into a fit of laughter behind you. The traitors.

“It’s just my suggestion,” Albedo says, putting his hands up, “Just try it out.”

“I don’t get paid enough for this, how am I supposed to moan with Yn next to me?”

“I get dried up just looking at you.”

“The world gets dry from looking at you.”  

“You should have no trouble faking a moan, since it’s probably what everyone you’ve ever slept with has done.”

Albedo snaps his fingers in front of you both.

“I don’t care how you do it, just harmonize a moan or two for me,” Albedo says, pushing you both back into the booth, “I would like to go home early for once.”

“We won’t be able to see you,” Albedo adds, “So feel free to do whatever helps you get out the best moans.”

“Gross,” Scara called out as Albedo shut the door behind him.

“I’m going to kill myself,” you mumble as you tug the microphone towards you once again.

Scara glares at you as you both stand in the booth, the microphone between you two a symbol of your forced cooperation. You can feel the tension radiating off him, and it's not helping your own nerves. You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself.

"Let's just get this over with," you mutter, avoiding Scara's eyes.

"Fine," he snaps, crossing his arms. "But don't think for a second that I'm happy about this."

You roll your eyes. "Yeah, well, neither am I."

There's a long, uncomfortable silence as you both stare at the microphone. Outside the booth, Albedo is watching, his expression expectant. You glance at Scara, trying to gauge his mood. He's scowling, but there's a flicker of something else in his eyes—something like hesitation.

"Look," you say, trying to sound reasonable in an attempt to get this over with. "Let's just do one take and see how it goes. If it sounds terrible, we can convince Albedo to scrap the idea."

Scara raises an eyebrow, but after a moment, he nods. "Fine. One take."

You both lean towards the microphone, your faces inches apart. You can feel Scara's breath on your skin, and it sends a shiver down your spine. You close your eyes, trying to block out the awkwardness, and focus on the task at hand.

Taking a deep breath, you let out a soft, hesitant moan. It feels strange and embarrassing, but you push through, hoping it will be over soon. Beside you, Scara does the same, his moan blending with yours. 

Scaramouche’s moans would usually sound like a sexually-transmitted disease: gross and something that you’d never touch with a fifteen-foot pole, but for a moment, it created an unexpected harmony.

Albedo's voice crackles through the intercom. "That was... actually not bad. Let's try it one more time, but with a bit more feeling. Scara, go a bit lower.”

You both go through the motions again, and you try to ignore how Scara’s moans sound so resonant through your headphones and the heat on your cheeks from making such an intimate sound beside him. 

Albedo’s voice comes through the intercom again. “Perfect. That’s exactly what we needed.”

You sigh with relief, tugging off the headphones as fast as you could and slipping out the booth.

As you and Scara step out of the booth, you're immediately met with the smirking faces of the other members. They're lounging on the studio couch, looking far too amused for your liking.

Childe is the first to speak, a stupid grin plastered across his face. "Well, well, look at you two. Didn't know you two were that freaky."

Lumine snickers, giving you both a mock round of applause. "That was hot. It felt like I was interrupting.”

“I hope you all die,” Scara says from beside you before turning to Albedo, “And you’re a freak for suggesting that.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Albedo hums, already tuning them out as he has his headphones back on.

"Alright, alright," you say, trying to change the subject. "Can we please focus on something else now?"

Venti stands up, stretching. "Fine, fine. But you know we’re never going to let you live this down, right?"

“I’m personally going to buy several copies of this album,” Yoimiya giggles.

“I hope Albedo makes you guys do something embarrassing,” you huff.

"No wonder you're still a virgin if you sound like that when moaning,” Scaramouche says, smirking as he slips past you to sit on the couch. 

“Shut up,” you grumble.

“Can’t even defend yourself,” Scara taunts.

“Lot of talk for someone who also hasn’t gotten laid in a while,” Aether whistles.

“Whose side are you on, Aether?!”

//

Later that day

“Let’s just get this over with,” you sigh as you follow your members towards the studio.

“I’m excited,” Venti hums, skipping ahead of you.

“I’m surprised at how quickly they pulled this together,” Xiao comments, opening the door for you, “It’s like they’ve been waiting for you two to fuck up.”

“Which you have, several times,” Lumine unhelpfully pipes up from behind you.

“I’m so sick of you guys,” you grumble, accepting your fate.

As you walked into the studio, you could only stare in disbelief at the high ceiling, the windows that took the length of the walls letting in the evening light, poppy color mottled across the sky as the sun quietly set behind you. Wealth practically drips from the room as you look around. You never even used this space for your album photoshoots, since you guys never needed such a big space for just you six.

In one of the corners you spotted a large camera standing tall in front of a white backdrop, the ground adorned with roses and petals. The white-pink petals fluttered in the wind as the fans in the corner caused them to float throughout the studio. The reds and pinks jump out against the white. It was sickeningly romantic. You wanted to throw up at the implication.

You spotted Jean talking to Scaramouche, who looked like she was giving the other a pep talk before she spotted you and waved you over.

“Yn! We were just discussing the photoshoot, Lisa will instruct you two after she’s done talking to the crew. I need to go chat with them, you two stay here and get ready,” Jean rushed out, calling over some stylists to fix you guys up, already out of breath as she dashed over to Lisa. 

“You’re late,” Scara says as his greeting as a group of women start fussing over your guys’ hair and outfits.

“You’re early, tryhard.”

“Not your best comeback,” Yoimiya whistles from a few feet away.

“Alright you guys,” Lisa calls out, walking over to where your groups were gathered getting touched up, “We’re going to get the group shots over with, then some solo ones, and we’ll separate to do some pairing shots.”

//

They all stood together awkwardly as they waited for the staff to finish setting up the cameras, once they finally did they led the group and positioned them. For group pictures they had all the girls stand to one side and the guys on the other, so you guys were in a crescent moon shape. Right after you all separate, the girls in another set and the males in a different one. 

The cameraman moved and adjusted everyone for what felt like a hundred dozen times before he finally clapped and positioned you guys to take the picture. He had you hold a pose where you were sitting on a bench and leaning on your side for what felt like forever, you would surely gain some sort of back pain from this. 

The most awkward part was the solo photoshoots. Even after becoming an idol you still felt awfully awkward when doing them, but when it was just your members you could manage. But being in front of Scara made you feel extra self conscious. 

People like Aether and Childe had a blast, and all the girls seemed to be enjoying it. But you felt quite embarrassed as you were told to pose seductively and show more skin. You weren't alone in this predicament, since Xiao and Kazuha seemed to be having a tough time as well when they were forced to manspread on some seats. Scaramouche became complacent and let the cameraman adjust him accordingly, he even went along with the whorish poses Lisa was having too much fun making them all do.

“Doesn’t Scara look good manspreading half naked like that?” Venti whispers in your ear.

You jump, startled as you stare back at him in disdain.

“No,” you scoff, “Stop ogling him.”

You’re still still stuck on the fact that Scaramouche is shirtless and actually has a decent build. Yes, it's objectively hot—something that you’d admit under the pain of getting an arm hacked off—but it's also quite insane.

With the group photoshoot finished, they all bid farewell as they separated off into their own corners to do their paired shots. 

“Alright, Scara and Yn you guys are going to be in Set B,” Jean stated, gently pushing the two of them in that direction. You look and spot the dreaded set where it looked like cupid himself threw up.

You both trailed behind the cameramen over to it, trying your best to not step and wilt any of the flowers artistically placed on the ground. 

“Okay, I’m in charge of you guys!” Lisa grinned as you guys approached her, “I’m going to have so much fun with you two.”

“Not too much fun,” Scaramouche grumbles as you both go to stand before the camera.

“Scara, don’t be a prude and unbutton your shirt. Yn, I need you to lay down,” Lisa instructs, walking over and pushing you down until you’re laying down on the petals. You were still reluctant at the fact you would have to do a paired photoshoot with Scara, so your reaction time was still quite slow. Lisa eventually just adjusted your body as needed and bent down next to you, spreading out your hair and laid some petals on it, standing up to admire her work. 

“Scaramouche, you’re gonna hover over them and hold that position for a while, and when I say next you lean in as if you’re going to kiss them. Is that alright?” Lisa asked, already heading back to the camera and having the cameramen adjust it lower to capture them in the frame. 

“If I say no, does that do anything?” Scara asks.

“No! Now get to it!”

Scara mutters a curse under his breath as he begins to unbutton his button up. You catch a glimpse of his bare skin before he’s kneeling down to knees and crawling over you, placing both palms on either side of your head and leaning forward. Since he couldn’t just hold a plank over you forever, Scara placed one knee in between your legs and another one beside your left leg for stability. 

Your breath was hitched in your throat at the proximity, you could see every detail of Scara’s stupid face and makeup from underneath him. You couldn’t help but let your mind wander to how intimate you both were being right now, you’d never been underneath someone like this before. Unless you were being pinned down by Lumine during a fistfight of some sort when you accidentally ate her food. 

“Yn! Put your arms around his neck!”

You flinched at Lisa’s yell but did as you were told and wrapped your arms around Scara’s neck, bringing him closer as you did so. There wasn't anywhere to look but at Scara’s eyes, which felt awkward and weird in itself, so you opted for your eyes to wander. But they landed on his lips instead, which wasn’t any better.

Scara’s dark eyes bore into yours, his gaze not wavering as you looked everywhere but at him. That was before you realized this was a literal photoshoot and adjusted your eyes back to him. 

“Both of you, stop glaring!”

Scaramouche sighed above you, before forcing himself to soften his gaze towards you. It felt odd to be looked at like an equal by him.

You study Scaramouche closely, now that you’re forced to. He has these lips that are plush pink and they meet just barely like the slightest touch would coax them open. His eyelashes are long and there’s a beauty mark just shy of his eye coated over with concealer. His ears are small and there’s an assortment of earrings hanging off of them, ones he never wears during practice. He’s stupidly pretty. It makes you want to punch him.

“Alright, hold for ten then move to the next position.” 

Ten seconds? That felt like hours due to the way Scara was looking down at you, a fabricated gentle gaze in his eyes as he eyed you up and down. 

“Next!” 

“The faster we comply the faster I can get out of this stupid position with you,” Scara huffs, his voice barely above a whisper before he leans forwards and hovers his lips right above your jaw. Your body instinctively moves its hands to run through his hair, as if you both were actually going to kiss. God forbid.

“Cut!” 

The lights dimmed and Scara immediately pushed himself off of you. You slowly sat up, dizzy from the stress of being that close to someone you disliked.

“I’m the one who had to hover over you and you’re tired? Pathetic,” Scara huffs, reaching down to roughly tug your arm so you’re standing and almost immediately letting go of you after.

“Don’t you think this is a little too much?” Scara asks, walking ahead of you towards where Lisa was looking through the photos

“We made everyone do paired shoots, see!” Lisa says, turning the screen to show you. 

You and Scara scroll through to see all your members in pairs like you both, but none of them are quite like yours. 

“So Venti and Aether got to pose in a car and we had to fake a kiss?” Scara scoffs, “Where’s the delete button–?"

Lisa yanks the camera from him before he has the chance and shoos them off.

“I’ve got enough from you guys, go get your makeup undone.”

“This is so dumb,” you grumble as you follow behind Scara. All of this work because you both couldn’t keep your mouth shut during an awards show and now you had to fake being in love with the idiot.

You pray to Buddha, God, and whatever other deity out there that was most certainly laughing at you, that you can manage to get along with Scaramouche before anyone does notice it’s all fake.

stuck with you!

masterlist — prev | next

when i say moans i mean like the song Mmmh by KAI like do u see the vision

also the album cover can be you or one of the other members depending on what ur comf with 😇

pls ignore how is it fake is listed twice 😔 also the lyrics are from taylor i can see you

yk the drill comment on the masterlist if i can use ur user and make u a fan

synopsis — after the disaster that was the live award show, where you and scaramouche got into an argument on stage after both of your groups got a tie for top artists, your guys' PR teams have been in shambles trying to scrape up your mess. that's when the idea to send you both off with some other idols to a remote location for a survival dating show to mend your public image comes up. before you know it your bags are packed and you’re on a plane to a remote island. the only obligation is you need to end up with scaramouche at the end of the show, whether you end up liking him or not doesn’t matter to your managers as long as the show’s ratings stay high. whatever you do in between to get there is up to you!

notes sorry guys for the long wait i was lowk goin thru it but im back 🗣️

taglist closed — @na1lea @cindywasneverhere @lunavixia @aestherin @mlaakai @camvrin @retiredmommylover @iheartpieck @jangyung @cartierfiles @loveariel @silly-ez @mochipls @pomeiu @chuuismylife @flowerypesky @creammpuff @justanothertiredreader @boxdisappeared @kissmiere @kissingkzuha @webbywill @kazusboyfriend @s3xpistolss @pjsucks @bunns-wonderland @lordbugs @localgirlywithnolife @kosumos @danfelions @featuredtofu @pinxeajin @herebyaccident0 @haeunoo @scaradooche @pglt19 @chemiru @childesbabygirl @simonisferal @shutingstar @vxcmx @domimiki @ttalgi @esuz @tokkishouse @kitsuvil @scarasmood @ihearttori @nomurahayami @starringyau @androxphobic @kazuhasbabe

[xiao-come-home]

Argenti relationship headcanons;

┏━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━┓

✰ Characters: Argenti x reader.

✰ Words: ~1k.

✰ SFW ; gn!reader, no mentions of pronouns. fluff.

Warnings: might be slightly sug/gestive here and there. i tried but he's too hot :pensive: written with jp voice in mind

A/N: I'm honestly so surprised there's so little Argenti content that IM OFFENDED. i need MORE OF HIM BEING CUTE AND LOVING ME. i cant pull him now but i next time he wont escape me

┗━━━✦❘༻༺❘✦━━━┛

Argenti:

He absolutely wakes up looking like a princess. Sun rays illuminating his face so beautifully, his chest slowly rising up and down (and his um, chest muscles being also blessed by the sun rays if you get me), his lips parted ever so slightly, hair sprawled out, but still looking untouched by the nights sleep.

His long eyelashes flutter open, and his emerald eyes scan the room drowsily; once the knight sets his eyes on you, he smiles to himself and turns to his side to face you.

He admires you sleeping, for... quite some time. Even if your hair is not perfect at all, or there's a drool running down your face - he's mesmerized. and I truly mean it, he's trying to calm down the butterflies in his stomach. Argenti can't help but cup your cheek and caress it gently with his thumb; his sleepy smile growing even wider when he feels you stir in your sleep.

even though it's never in his intentions to awaken you (he actually kinda wishes you kept sleeping so he could still admire you lol), he takes advantage of that and begins to place warm and slow kisses on your face to wake you up. his hair shields you from the harsh sunlight, faintly tickling you here and there.

hear me out, it surely looks nice from your angle, but his back muscles..

depending on your mood, these kisses may trail somewhere else. i mean.. can you imagine him between your thighs. because i can and it's not making me feel well.

"my brightest rose, good morning. seeing your magnificent eyes once again fills me with happiness and energy for the upcoming day." wipes off your drool sexily

he sleeps SHIRTLESS (you told him you were cold. he pretended to believe it).

random dances across all the planets at (seemingly) random times. he doesn't care whether you can dance or not, but he'll be honored to teach you if you wish. argenti would absolutely get you to dance whenever you feel down just to make you laugh; wrong moves don't matter - it'd probably hurt you more if you stepped on his armor...

listen. he doesn't care if it's cringe, but he will hold a rose between his teeth and dance with you, if that's what makes you laugh.

has probably thought once or twice if you're the truest manifestation of Idrila. He's never been so mesmerized by someone's beauty, so... maybe? ... *rubs hands and smirks*

does NOT give a single sheet if he's in public or not - but he always, ALWAYS kisses you like it's your last kiss. They're so passionate, intimate, and sensual, that it makes people flustered at the sight of you. He pulls you close by your waist, swiftly switching his hands to cup your cheeks; the knight puts his forehead against yours and whispers a few silly words before finally connecting your lips together. The kiss, although as simple as it could be, leaves you hungry for more - it takes a while for him to finally part, but just enough to refill the air in your lungs.

now, it wouldn't be as awkward to other people if it took you a few minutes, but argenti TAKES HIS TIME. he has to kiss you (or makeout at this point lol) until your lips are swollen from his kisses. then he moves on to his duties like nothing happened.

he truly wants you to hold him by his waist when you two kiss, or at least have your hands on his chest. he'll put them on the desired place by himself if you don't do it. what a dork.

touch is just so, so important to him. he has a hard time getting rejected, no matter if it's a hug or kiss, it makes him feel unwanted. he won't show it outside much, but he might be less... dramatic and excited than usual.

he SO SHOWS OFF FOR YOU it's almost reckless sometimes. "My lady, fear not, as I am here to protect your beauty until my very end!" Argenti kisses your knuckles before parting to defeat the enemy with ease.

Calculated how to fall just enough to dramatically appear on his knees and put his hand on his heart before you, "Beloved, the evil has been obliterated with the power of love my heart stores for your beautiful soul!"

He KNOWS his cheesy lines either make you cringe (with love), laugh or you're just an adorable soul who genuinely likes lines like these, he RAMPS them up like crazy.

just throwing it out there so we're clear: to argenti, consent is a must, regardless of the activity. no consent, he's moving on. thinks consent is se/xy. HE'S THE EMBODIMENT OF CONSENT.

his hair probably smells really nice. a faint smell of strawberry, perhaps..

the beauty knight usually wants you to stay out of battles, but holy sheet if he sees you kick someone's ass so good, he's impressed and proud. probably needs a bathroom break also..

"oh, how much do i wish that was me instead..." - argenti probably

actually wouldn't mind to have friendly spares with you from time to time - it's a good opportunity for both to test your skills. or maybe give argenti an opportunity to straddle you... that's also an option.

remembers every date that's important for you. in return, he doesn't really care about his, but might tear up when you show up with a gift.

he'd actually love to help you dress up! nothing sexual involved, just pure intimacy of helping his beloved. his moves are precise, careful not to harm you in any way with his armor; he relishes in the feeling of your skin being so tender compared to his.

[ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal]

Don’t ever tell yourself that you’re not enough, I am certain that you’re truly fine

PART FIVE

Ot8 x reader

Word Count: 812

Just a warning, this is my first fanfic! Does have age regression themes so if you’re not a fan, I ask that you respectfully just don’t read <3 also this will definitely have some angst

!THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION!

Days passed and everytime you hung out with them, they seemed more affectionate than usual.

“Is something going on?” You asked suddenly after Seungmin wrapped a fluffy blanket around you the second you sat down on the couch.

The guys look at eachother as if silently communicating then Seungmin chuckles a bit and playfully scoffs. “There is nothing going on,” he says, not being able to make up an excuse otherwise.

You look at Seungmin curiously, not believing him for a second. “All of you have me basically catering to my every need for days now.”

“Oh please, you’re just delusional,” Seungmin tries to play it off, crossing his arms over his chest.

Looking at the guys again, you notice Felix avoiding eye contact. You look at him for a few more seconds before trying to get information from him, knowing he would most likely be the person to tell you the truth. “Lixie? Is there something that y’all aren’t telling me?”

Before Felix can open his mouth, Changbin speaks. “Oh I can’t take it anymore. This is eating me alive!” He says dramatically, before turning to you “We know about your age regression.”

Your face drops in shock with his sudden outburst, hearing Han, Seungmin, Hyunjin and Chris give Changbin a collective “really dude”.

“How…” seems to be the only thing you could say, your eyes looking between each of the guys.

Chris clears his throat before explaining quietly as if he is scared for the outcome of his sentence, “the other night… the night you wanted to leave suddenly… you showed signs of being a little…” He trails off, looking at you genuinely.

“Before you say anything or try to deny it, we think it’s cute.” Hyunjin says quickly, his eyes wide to try and get his point across.

Felix looks at Hyunjin and chuckles, “Hyung, if you keep looking at her like that, you’ll probably freak her out.” He says, trying to lighten the situation, causing a few of the guys to chuckle.

“I-I just… how do you guys know what that is? Or how to look for signs of it?” You ask, curious how they all caught on.

“The old guy knows about it… but don’t ask him how because it’s the most depressing story you’ll ever hear!” Seungmin explains, causing Chris to playfully shove him, saying a quick “it’s not depressing… and im not old!”

You look at Chris, as if observing him. A part of you always seen Chris as some type of caregiver, but now you don’t know if he knows about it in that sense or if he is possibly a little himself. “I want to know the story…” You blurt out, wanting to know the explanation which causes seungmin to playfully groan.

So Chris explains, and your eyes soften as he does. “You were a caregiver to littles online who didn’t have one because you always wanted to be a caregiver?” You ask softly, causing Seungmin to say “See! Depressing!”

“After Hyung told us about how he suspected you as a little, we wanted to learn how to be a caregiver,” Minho speaks up, his eyes looking at you softly. “We wanted you to feel comfortable around us enough so if you ever wanted or needed to regress… you can.”

This explanation makes you tear up. Knowing the guys went out their way to want to learn how to properly be a caregiver… no one has ever done that before. “You wanted to do that… for me?” You ask, your voice just above a whisper.

“We would move mountains for you, Sunbeam, if it meant seeing you carefree and happy.” Felix reassured you, smiling gently.

The petname made you blush, your cheeks now covered a pinkish red. “I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you guys.”

“Okay, back up!” Han says, standing up from the couch. “Why hasn’t anyone informed me of this information?!?! Where was I when all of you had this important discussion of our princess?” He expresses playfully, though he is very serious.

The guys looks at one another, forgetting to tell Han any of this. “In our defense, you were sleeping next to her when we talked about it!” Jeongin informs, raising his hands up defensively.

“Wait, Hannie, you didn’t know? Then why were you so affectiante with me as well?” You ask curiously.

Han’s mouth pratcially drops in shock, “I am always affectionate with you!” He says in a desperate voice. “You’re my whole world, I always treat you like you’re the most delicate thing in the world!”

“Okay, yeah you make a good point.” I say, chuckling a bit.

Changbin stands up and goes to crouch infront of you, looking up at you. “Since the cat is now out the bag… maybe now you can help us know how to properly take care of you.”

TAGLIST: @puppyminnnie

[howler-moon]

Caitlyn Arcan.......

I'm currently dying of the flu all that's keeping me alive is thinking about arcane because my head hurts if I look at bright colours for too long or listen to anything with more than three syllables. (Update after writing I genuinely don't understand my original point for writing this im so out of it but its too much to not post now so i think i just wanted to info dump about caitlyn because i NEED ACT THREE I NEED IT NOW PLEASE PLEASE PLEAE PLEAS)

Anyway I do believe some people are missing that its not just Cassandra's death that is motivating Caitlyn to make the worst possible decisions known to man, although it is the thing that tips the scale for her. All this started way back in S1 E4 when Jinx went to steal the Hextech research. While Caitlyn was on duty she blew up a building as a distraction, killing 6 of her colleagues and almost herself according to Jayce. This incident alone already seemed to shake her up as she spent the majority of her time recovering absolutely obsessing over the case and who the culprit is (Vi herself says "and I thought Power could get obsessed" upon seeing her research she was LOCKED IN). Branching off from this, this incident also almost cost Caitlyn her job, something she has fought tooth and nail for against her mother's wishes and barely gets any respect in the field despite being like the only Enforcer who was good or even cared about her job (RIP Grayson). Say what you will about the Enforcers whether you don't care or despise what they stand for but you can't deny how important that job is to Caitlyn. Its her main source of independence ("she'd do anything to keep me from seeing the real world") and being forced to work behind a desk because of Jinx's attack would absolutely destroy her.

Skipping ahead to episode 9 we all know about the shower scene.......That shit is mad scary like hello?? It's like a direct parallel to the attack where she first met her as well. The smoke/steam clears and Caitlyn just looks up in dread to see Jinx's art sprawled across the wall. Except this time, instead of being some unfamiliar symbol out in the open, she knows what it means. She knows who it belongs to and that person is inside her home. In her bathroom no less, while she was brooding in the shower lmao. She genuinely could not be any more vulnerable in this situation and now she has been kidnapped and brought to some Mad Hatter esque tea party in some dingy run down factory in the middle of no where with the Silco and Vi causally tied up beside her. She's absolutely terrified too she flinches and begs Vi to the best of her ability not to shoot her, only for Jinx to go and threaten to do it instead. Keep in mind Caitlyn probably has no idea why Jinx wants her dead. Like she might have some idea but not to the level that the audience does simply because she is not informed by the humble dramatic irony. When she finally does break free Jinx ever so causally beats the shit out of her in the blink of an eye and of course to top it off once she wakes up again she's watching a nuke fly straight to her mother's exact location.

I don't think I need to explain why her mother dying would upset her. That was a massive blow (wayheyhey), and dramatically worsens the obsession we saw in S1. But the memorial.........guys think of the memorial........... Now let it be known to the court that this part was Ambessa's doing. Ambessa was the one who organised the attack on the memorial, but Cait doesn't know that. She wouldn't have taken Ambessa's offer if she did. To Caitlyn this is another thing Jinx has done, another attack directly on her for no reason other than to be cruel. To rub it in her face. Gassing the streets and engaging in police brutality is NOT the way to go trust me I was just as appalled as everyone at the start of S2 E3 like genuinely hand over my mouth saying "thats a war crime" to the screen over and over like she would hear me, but it did not come out of nowhere for no reason (whether good or bad). Caitlyn voices her frustration of "why is peace always the justification for violence" but she probably believes violence is a justification for violence considering her reactions to the memorial and Warwick's attack on Stillwater. She's not one to lead with violence but she will follow with it if properly provoked, and my god have people been provoking her. The time she shot Sevika, her initial hostility when captured by the Firelight's, up until The Grey, Cait has only responded violently when someone acted violently towards her/Vi. She only starts acting out first after the memorial but she still believes it's in response to what Jinx has done to her, even when it's people who have nothing to do with her. I think Ambessa further trains this response into her with their little spars as seen in S2 E6. When Huck jumpscares Caitlyn in S1 E6, she does pull her gun out on him yeah I'll give you that, but she doesn't do anything to him. It's more of a warning or means to defend herself as Vi is bleeding out on the floor behind her in this dingy little hole full of Shimmer addicts and she does talk it out with him. Whereas as season later in S2 E6, as soon as she sees Vi she does not hesitate she goes STRAIGHT for the kill, jumps down and fucking body slams her before even realizing who she was.

Anyway yeah I'm becoming ill again my point is, like every character in the show everything Cait has done has been building up since day one. It's not good that shes doing anything to get revenge but when you look at it from her perspective its like damn girl what did she do. Yes she's in a privileged position yes she works for the police but she's still human dawg how would you react to the situations she has been in. Mel is literally feeding into government corruption yall didn't care when she told Jayce to lay off with the Hex gate restrictions to keep the rich people happy and yall still love her (I love her too).

The parallels between Jinx and Cait go absolutely crazy they're both the same and on opposite sides of the spectrum at the same time. I understand why people prefer her more so than Cait, she's more of the underdog we've known her since she was a child and the majority of the things that happened to her happened when she was very young which makes it more tragic I am not denying that she is as relatable as a terrorist can get I love Jinx<333 Jinx my pookie Jinx my beloved <333 But I also love Caitlyn because she's silly and a girlfailure. My point is that I find it so weird that the Arcane fandom can hate a character for doing something bad and refuse to see their side of things when literally every character has done something bad if not worse and their side they have no trouble seeing/accepting. Except Ekko, Ekko genuinely has done nothing wrong in his life I've never met an Ekko hater in my life and if they exist I don't believe you.

If you're wondering what my opinion is on Jayce its that I appreciate what he adds to the story but I would hate to have a conversation with him. Not because I hate him but because I'm on my period right now and he would act like it's a cancer diagnosis

please dont hurnt me

[livelaughlovesubs]

Sorry in advance this is more venting and a personal update if anything

I've had this online stalker for over a year and the past few months I was able to shake him off but now that I'm doing content creation, and (im stupid so) I chose to use the same name over several platforms, he found me again this week and has been spam messaging me the past three days. He currently knows 3 Instagram accounts, my Reddit, YouTube, one of my Tumblr accounts(this one is safe as of now), and my tik tok. A couple of these accounts have different handles so I have no idea how he could have found them as they aren't even linked in my profiles or even under the same email. I first "met" him when he dmmed me out of the blue on Instagram. I still don't know how exactly he chose my account to reach out to. I shit you not ALL this guy does is ask me for USED PANTIES and sometimes nudes despite me never posting my real name, sex, or a single photo of my appearance. If I block him he just makes a new account. You can't even block people on YouTube. If I report him, nothing is done. I've tried. The law enforcement in my country isn't the most reliable or well liked so I don't trust anything will really be done. He has his town in his bios so I know he lives halfway across the country from me. It doesn't seem like too much of a threat now, but his irrational obsessive persistence is what scares me thinking it could turn dangerous later.

I'm planning on dropping all social media or at the very least a long hiatus from everything because of this probably by next week. At this point I would rather be dramatic now than have the possibility that I could be put in actual danger later because of this

Holy shit wtffff. If I understood it right he’s not the same guy from your job, how comes people are literally out to get you??? I’m so sorry to hear that, and god it must be awful to go through something like that. Online stalking is really scary, and it’s even worse when you know nothing can do dine about it. It’s totally fine if you decide to go on hiatus or take a break from social media. Don’t worry too much about it, better be safe than sorry.

Your own security is still the most important, and if you have a bad feeling about it, no need to hesitate on doing something against it.

Also shame on that guy for being a freaking pervert, the heck is wrong with him

[vivihar]

i have so much to say about tomerus so it’s going here

so first they’re the divorced couple who hate eachother and are mildly successful and have lives for themselves and mansions and cars and severus is eyeing young boys across the room at posh parties and tom is glaring at the back of his head daring him to even try and get anyone that is him and they’re dancing with two different people, kissing them, letting their hands trail while keeping full eye contact and smiling at each other JUST TO RUB IT IN

and they probably try and kill eachother and talk shit about each other to other party goers who are just wanting to chat abt like…rich people shit idk. and then they accidentally find each other in the bathroom and they’re like wild animals clawing and gripping and biting at each other and then walking out like it’s nothing just to go back to shit talking each other until tom gets a message that says ‘i’ll pay for your cab’ so yes he IS going to see his annoying but sexy ex husband

————

and they’re DEFINITELY the ‘you’re going to kill me?’ ‘i’ll do just that.’ ‘well, go ahead.’ ‘i’ll do this my own way.’ ‘you won’t do it. you can’t pull the trigger. you can’t do it because you love me. it takes a very brave and cold man to do that, sev. i don’t think you can. isn’t that true? isn’t that why you’re waiting?’ ‘that’s not true-’ ‘or is it because you want to watch your victim? you want my heart to constrict with agony, my hands to shake. you want me to plead for my life so you can make a generous gesture and spare me.’ while dressed like this

————

i love a good jennifer’s body reference and especially loser sev, jennifer tom js bc of the whole plot of the film and the homoerotic friendship with a hint of ‘you’re killing people!!’ ‘no, i’m killing boys.’

————

tbh i LIKE tom being in charge but severus having a man that stays at home and does whatever he asks is also a very big thing for me with them…like severus makes him wear a cute dressing gown (i put below) and stay at home just being pretty and he just wants someone to bring along to his expensive parties to piss off his old ex husbands with his smile saying ‘look how cute my husband is’ with tom just nodding along to whatever he says.

————

i think they definitely have each others names/initials carved into them somewhere and their bite marks tattooed (at most scarred) into their skin…btw…

OKAY IM DONE !! LOVE YOU VIVI !!

(these are the fits for the first paragraph but i found of them too late)

I was thinking about Fem Tomerus these few days and this kinda made me think about them more thanky.

Also I agree, they would be so petty and have bickerings a lot and other people just be tired of their shit😭 'go marry again leave us alone'

And I know Tom only divorced because he was like "I don't even care about you" lying to himself and now he's all pissed his ex husband is single and others could lay hand on him which comes the bathroom scene lol he would try leave marks as much as he can so other people wouldn't want to be together with Sev.

The dress are in point 😭they would wear all classy and act like toddlers fight always and do their whole dramatic talkings. They're so pathetic it's funny, I think I'm going to make few divorced Tomerus posts after this because it's so funny 😭😭.

I don't remember anything from Jen's body so I probably will rewatch it for only this,,

Btw that's literally canon. Voldemort was making plans and other things but like Lucius was the one in ministry, he makes his followers do the things while he spend time at home lol I like him being rich lover for Severus (because Sev is my fav and I need him get spoiled by someone) but this is canonish so I understand where you come from.

Ooh you're soooo right, Tom would 100% make Severus carry his initials and after being married Tom for a long time Severus would be more confident with what he wants and start to have same interests as Tom's (being obsessively and freaky). I think Tom has initials on Sev and Severus has his bite mark scared on Tom.

I love you too darling 🧡

[daydreaming-scheming-demon]

i hate mainstream appeal, or at least an extreme and intentional amount of it. actually, hate isnt a strong enough word. despise. absolutely fucking despise.

so many companies just do not care for experimentation, and whenever they do the experimentation is barely anything. i see this in so much stuff, in how cgi and specifically certain styles of cgi has taken over cinema to the point where the few 2d animated films, especially the western 2d animated films, just dont do as well, even when they're popular IPs, because cgi has become standard. it aint an animated film if it aint cgi.

and not just cgi, but a very specific style of cgi. you see it in everything. it started with toy story, when toy story did it, it was great. it was original. it was actually trying something new. but then they kept doing it, and then every studio joined in when they realized it was cheaper. not just cgi but a specific style of cgi, not necessarily even the cheapest style, just a very mainstream one. i see it in encanto, in turning red, in inside out. dont get me wrong, i dont think this style is bad or that these movies dont still have unique aspects of their style, but you cant deny the similarities, and more importantly, the reason for those similarities, that being a need to appeal to the mainstream.

and it's annoying, and it bleeds into the story too, into the characters. they never pass a certain boundary, trying to stay firmly away from controversy, within the confines of family friendliness and a mainstream understanding of concepts. and this is restricting in some serious ways. to clarify, i do not want them to swear, i do not even want them to show blood or a whole lot that would get labelled as too mature for children. i just want them to not shy away from vaguely controversial things, to not be afraid of issues beyond a mainstream understanding, and to not cater to such a simplistic and common worldview so dramatically.

one of the things that makes stories, and media in general, so special to me, is their unique perspectives. i see this a lot in indie projects, and the contrast between them and big budget hollywood films is startling. i get a feel for such unique individual perspectives in indie projects, even the bad ones, and i guess that's what happens when the team is smaller or it's mostly only one person working on the project, because we're all unique, im sure even the individuals who make up the mainstream audience have unique perspectives, but that just doesn't come across in these larger films, or games, or anything really. anything disney, or nintendo.

and sure, you could say this is just because it's a smaller team. and im sure that's a contributing reason, no doubt. but the thing is, the contrast in worldviews between some of the more personalized large projects and the things curated to the tastes of the masses. take gravity falls for instance, a disney IP, but not one considered enough to bother curating at the time, just a show, not a film at the cinema. the style of cringe comedy it has, the way it tells stories and reveals mysteries, the absurdist view on the world it has, sure, it has a lot of people behind it, but a unique perspective on the world comes across well. the same with something like spiderverse, which is a big budget film, but damn did they know what they were doing.

and the unique perspectives disney films have on the world? well, they're there. there is kind of a difference, but it's barely as drastic. you can tell it was kept within tight confines, unwilling to present anything that the mainstream wouldnt easily comprehend, agree with, or find appealing.

and that's just so infuriatingly limiting. you can say it makes sense because the kind of person this is appealing to is like, the most common kind of person. that fact probably even plays a part in why these movies and other things are like this to begin with, though certainly not the only reason.

but do you not think the common person deserves more? deserves to be presented with things outside of their understanding? or comfort? i dont just interact with media that fits my own beliefs and perspective, yknow. because i think it's quite a good thing to do that.

i just, ughhhh. the mainstream bugs me so much. i dont even think a lot of these things are necessarily bad. encanto had good songs, inside out 2 dealt with issues of anxiety well within the limitations of mass appeal, turning red actually mentioned periods which was a small and good step outside the usual boundaries. but they just, they rub me the wrong way, yknow. they all do. most of the big live action hollywood movies too. same with many kinds of games, especially nintendo games. i just hate it, it's so limiting on our media, it's why i mostly just go with independent stuff, because that way i can see more unique individual styles, ideas, etc.

and yknow what? i do actually think they should maybe show a bit of blood on screen for these movies sometimes. and go beyond the concept of family friendliness. because all that stuff is a load of rubbish in my eyes. beliefs that got too out of hand and have so much wrong with them. yeah, i think we should pass those boundaries for big media meant for the mainstream. not with everything, but definitely with a lot of things.

this was just a random rant about something i hate that i wrote in one take, dont nitpick with any details you think im not 100% correct on please. this isn't supposed to be a perfect critique of mainstream media, this is just me venting. okay?

[99point9percentwhump]

BBC ATLANTIS

The midday sun was beating down as Jason and Pythagoras struggled to push the over weighted wooden cart thru the soft sand just outside the city with Hercules picking up the rear.

"come on lads nearly there now." came the jovial encouragement from behind Pythagoras stood stretching his back painfully shooting the larger of the three a dirty look

"You know we'd have been there a half hour ago if you helped." the blond mathematician pointed out as Jason leaned wearily on the cart.

Hercules scoffed offended "Its my shoulder! I need to rest it or it'll never heal." rubbing it for dramatic effect.

Jason drew a hand across his sweaty forehead trying to fight off the wave of nausea threatening to strike "Pythagoras lets just get on with it." and readied to continue the journey into the city as Pythagoras  continued his disagreement with the older of the three "It'd probably heal faster if you didn't keep reinjuring it lifting pint mugs!" he accused.

Feeling anger and starting to physically shake Jason turned abruptly to the two "would you both just shut it and get this damn thing moving!" Jason shouted louder than intended shocking the duo

Hercules squinted at the younger man as he noted him starting to sway slightly "You alright?"

"w-we just have a little further to..." was all Jason managed before his gaze turned to the sky and his eyes rolled back and his body gave out collapsing to the sand barely being caught in the arms of Pythagoras  who struggled to support his deadweight.

"Jason?!" both men called out in worry as Pythagoras  eased him to the ground Hercules knelled down to take the younger man in his arms as Pythagoras lifted one of Jason's eyelids then placed a hand on his friends forehead "He's very warm!" he noted worried

"It is very hot out." Hercules pointed out leading to shake his head "no this is something else I think he has sun sickness we need to get him home."

Hercules pondered the situation for a moment "Right."

He grasped Jason under the shoulders and lifted him into his arms.

and the two rushed thru the busy streets to their sanctuary.

_______________________________________

in their shared dwelling finally out of the scorching sun Hercules lay the younger man on his bed.

"we need to cool him down take off his tunic and Ill make a tonic!" commented Pythagoras as Hercules followed his orders.

Once the drink was ready Pythagoras returned to Jason "Help sit him up."

Bracing Jason between them Pythagoras poured his herbal elixir between his friend's lips causing his to cough after a moment and finally his eyes fluttered open and gaze blurrily at the duo.

Hercules smiled "There he is."

Pythagoras peered into Jason's eyes and ran a hand over his forehead then let out a sigh or relief "think he's gonna be ok."

Jason groaned "i feel more dead than alive"

Letting a chuckle " as long as you dont go fainting on us again Im sure youll be up to getting the cart back here before dark eh!"

"I did NOT faint!" Jason countered

"well technically..." Pythagoras started but a cured look from Jason cut him off. "well you most certainly not going to go pushing that bloody cart at least."

Hercules scoffed "Fine Ill just have to use the donkey to bring it in then."

Both Jason and Pythagoras looked at the older man shocked "You mean you had a mule to pull that cart the whole time and didn't use it?!"

Hercules looked offeneded "Firstly a mule isnt a donkey second the cost would've been taken out of our pay and it was outrageous trust me." he finished with a nervous chuckle.

"How much?" Pythagoras asked causing Hercules to stammer "In terms of ale how much?!"

Jason grabbed the pillow behind him and threw it at the older man who ducked and took several quick steps to the door "two maybe three but its a sacrifice I'm willing to pay for till Jason is over his fainting spells." and he bolted out of the house.

Leaving Pythagoras and a still shaky Jason to look at each other dumbfounded Jason fell back heavily to the bed "Never."

Pythagoras shook his head "Nope ever again helping that... that mule of a man!" Jason laughed then groaned and lay an arm over his eyes.

[orionsangel86]

Welp. Okay I watched the last episode of ofmd.

To sum up my thoughts on this season I will say that whilst I enjoyed it and felt the love and passion and respect for its queer fanbase throughout, it didnt hit me the same way the first season did. It felt like maybe a little bit of that season 1 magic was missing and for that I very much blame Max's cutting off 2 episodes and slashing the budget. They had a lot of story they wanted to tell that would have worked so much better in 10 episodes.

I consider the last 3 episodes of season 1 some of the best TV I have seen in my life. From the use of The Chain in ep 8, through the dramatic highs and lows of eps 9 and 10 it was edge-of-your-seat drama and I was in awe at the creators that put it together. But one of the reasons why those 3 eps were so good is because the drama and the pivotal moments were given time to breath.

If those 3 eps were given the same lack of time and budget as season 2, no doubt they all would have been crammed into 1 episode and it would not have had the same impact.

If anything that last episode should have played out across two, with Izzy's death being the half way point and cliffhanger ending leading to a final battle and somewhat happy resolution.

I'm not mad at Izzy's death. If anyone was gonna die, it was gonna be him. His status as Blackbeards enabler and sometimes mentor is over. For Ed to truly be free, I think Izzy always had to go. From a storytelling perspective it makes perfect sense, even though I am sure a lot of fans are absolutely heartbroken about it.

Another casualty of the reduced screentime meant certain original cast members weren't given anywhere near the amount of screentime they should have had. I was expecting a lot more focus on Jim as they were basically the third lead of s1 due to them getting the same backstory as Ed and Stede. All of the crew appear to have had drastically reduced parts which does feel like a big loss to me.

Its funny actually, OFMD S2 suffered from the opposite problem to GOS2. OFMD had too much story to tell in a limited timeframe, GOS2 had very little story to tell outside of the flashbacks and probably too much time given to it. Both shows season 2s suffered from tremendously bad pacing issues.

Also, the one thing the final episode made so obvious to me, is the uncertainty of getting a s3 renewal. It is so clear in the way they tried to wrap things up in a happy bow as best they could, so that if they do get cancelled it leaves fans at least somewhat satisfied. I hate this though. I hate that studios are so fickle and ruthless that creators have to gamble with good quality writing and avoid cliffhangers because of asshole executives who dont actually care about the stories.

Because of the fast pacing, and the fear of cancellation, it felt more like a rush happy ending instead of a part way point in a bigger story, with important character development still to come. Perhaps I need more time to absorb the story in a full rewatch, but im not exactly itching for more at this point, whilst also not really being satisfied with what I got either. I wish we had left Ed and Stede in at least some minor peril, like have them captured and threatened with hanging but at least in a good place romantically, so that we can start speculating about what kind of escape plan they will come up with in season 3. Leaving them in a dilapidated old inn somewhere just felt wrong to me. Instead of ending the season with the stakes sky high (like season 1) it feels like they left season 2 with zero stakes at all, instead of at least a happy medium. At this point we should be turning to fanfiction and wondering what happens next, but instead I'm left thinking "okay then. That was good. What can I watch next?" I don't need to bury myself in fanfic and fanart to feed the hyperfixation this time around, and that is where I feel the most loss.

I'm sure others will have hugely different reactions to me though. Perhaps my expectations were too high? Perhaps my GO obsession just isn't leaving room for OFMD this time? But then again, I think if GOS2 hadn't ended the way it did, I wouldn't still be so obsessed with that either.

Sigh. I dunno. It was a good fun show and will no doubt still be hugely popular with devoted fans, but for me I just can't say it cast the same spell over me as it did last year.

[nikethestatue]

I’m seeing everyone talk about plot holes and inconsistencies in HOFAS. I read the book very quickly in another language and so I don’t really remember these. What are some plot holes in HOFAS?

One thing that’s been bugging me is, probably the only hole I caught, is the concept of limbs growing back for the Vanir, but this doesn’t happen in TOG or ACOTAR. Now that we know the Fae of Midgard are exactly the Fae of ACOTAR, and the Shifters are exactly the Fae of TOG, and it doesn’t seem like any type of evolution has occurred to change the Midgard Fae at all, im confused how regeneration is a thing. I suppose it’s never directly been mentioned in TOG. But Lucien is missing an eye. That faerie in book 1 ACOTAR had his wings ripped out by Amarantha and died from it. We know angels can regrow theirs. I know Cassian and Azriel have their wings shredded and healed at different points, but to me that seemed more like skin regrowing after being damaged rather than whole limbs regrowing. Idk, these things dont bug me severely but it is noticeable…

Just off he top of my head:

Amren who arrived during the time of the asteri/daglan can offer almost no info on them

She was in Prison during Fionn's/Theia's time, but regardless, she supposedly was there in the beginning and she can't provide any insight to anyone

Bryce arrives and conveniently, they just KNOW that she is gonna go exactly where the slithering beasts are...right

When someone drops from the sky or whatever and tells you that your whole world might be re-invaded and you have a history with these immensely powerful creatures who want to come back to your planet, asking 'may i look into your head' is just fucking dumb. It doesn't make you the King of Consent. It makes you the Lord of Dumbness. Why even have this daemati power if you never use it, even to save your people and your world potentially, because you are so...honourable? Come on. That's just ridiculously stupid. And oh-so convenient.

15 thousand years is a long time, but the amount of history that the Fae lose in that time is kind of dramatic. They conveniently remember nothing about their beginnings or anything that's connected to their past. But it doesnt make sense that they would forget because they live thousands of years. That time span could be only 4-6 generations. So their 15k is equivalent to our 200 years. We DEFINITELY know what happened 200 years ago. Like between Rhys and his dad alone, it's 1,500 life span. If grandpa High Lord lives for 2K years before, and another great-grandpa for another 2-3K years, we are REAL close to 15K. But no one remembers shit.

They dont even remember who built Velaris.

So for 15K years, NO ONE, not one person bothered to go on a walkabout in Hewn City, to check out all these walls with all these stories on them. It took Bryce to drop in and just miraculously look at a wall and see the entire history of prythian just like that.

Apparently, Azriel forgot how to winnow. So they needed some very elaborate way of crossing some river. Because he couldnt just transport them across it...

According to SJM 15,000 years is close enough to have an unbelievable resemblance between Ruhn and Rhys so much so that they look like twins, all because they shared some ancient ancestor. But apparently it's far enough for Rhys to know nothing about this ancestor, even though he is her direct descendant.

You have Rhys, whose blood is 'programmed' into the Prison and its wards, you have AMren who spent TWO THOUSAND years in Prison, you have Lanthys, a death god who heard the Harp and its note singing, you have the Bone Carver who imprisoned himself willingly in Prison--and yet NOT ONE OF THEM sensed the presence of an Asteri sleeping in a glass coffin beneath their feet.

Yet Super Bryce found the sleeping Asteri in 2 days. And managed to kill her too.

I can go on and on, but I think you get the point.

Prythians look like backward dopes and maybe they are, but I don't think they are supposed to be? Like the MOST POWERFUL HIGH LORD IN HISTORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! was taken by some girl in pink sneakers. Not to mention her stealing Azriel's prized unique dagger just like that.

[tonydaddingham]

I would not be surprised at all if this turned out to be The Fanservice Season of all time and mostly fluff, because Gaiman said that a season THREE would be an adaptation of the planned sequel novel. This is more like,,, an intermediate setup for the sequel. And I also heard that some stuff got cut out because of COVID complications. So on one hand I'm kind of, worriedly, expecting a dip in quality with S2; but it makes me wonder if we're going to get any real answers at all until the very last minute.

hey anon, evening!!!✨ not sure if you necessarily asked for it, but here's my take on what you've shared💓

i hear you re: concerns, and i think that is a risk with any sequel; that it won't carry the same panache, or quality, or heart and soul of what the original source material was or meant to be. this fandom is incredibly fervent and enthusiastic and every single one of us wants it to succeed, so it's only natural that the fandom might carry these doubts to varying degrees. the concern is usually only meant out of the sheer hope that it will be a fitting continuation of this hugely loved and magnificent book and series, rather than out-and-out pessimism that by nature of being a sequel, it was always doomed to failure.

the concern isn't unfounded... on paper. COVID had the potential to be fatal to elements of the tv/film industry, and certainly the way it works has since changed dramatically... some of it for worse, some of it for better. as you say, neil has been really candid that it affected the budget of s2 and therefore posed certain limitations, but i truly don't think it's going to be to s2's detriment. there is also the fact that there is no novel from which s2 will be adapted. however, that novel started in neil and terry's minds, the same genesis as s2/s3, and regardless of terry sadly having since passed away, it will always be the story they want or wanted to tell.

frankly, i think neil is naturally the no.1 fan of the story they built and were planning to build together (would be alarming if he weren't!) and obviously cares very deeply about not only it and its characters, but also the legacy that it embodies. if neil states that he's happy with, and proud of, how s2 turned out, im more than inclined to trust and believe him. he has the highest stake out of anyone else involved; cast, crew, studio, or fan.

exposition in books (from the uneducated, inexperienced view of this reader) is arguably easier to navigate than translating the same to screen. you have a literal narration in books as opposed to it being optional in tv (eg god in s1), whether that be 1st/2nd/3rd person, a central character or side character, whoever. so, elements like thought processes have to be acted out through an experience or as dialogue, rather than an inner-monologue recollection. a memory has to be actualised, rather than just remembered, because we don't have a written narrative to help us. for example, in the hypothetical book sequel, aziraphale could remember the job incident with probably a one page summary, and that would get the point across - but to adapt that the screen, that's going to require a more literal depiction so that the audience is up to speed, and there's no ambiguity.

so my thought process would be that s3, yes, would have been the hypothetical second book, but for tv's sake, s2 is made from elements of the first and second book combined. as you say, it's made to build a bridge to s3 where, i imagine, the proverbial will hit the fan. all of that set up, the exposition, background narrative, needs to be laid out somewhere, and im inferring that it would be altogether too much to put into a s3. hence s2 will exist. it would be a big story to tell, and easier to do in two books than in two series.

my gut feeling is, and i totally realise a) others may not agree, and b) this may end up being wrong, but some of that set-up in s2 is going to be a major tone shift. there usually is in any show/film or book series; in the middle of the overall story, the characters are put against conflict usually not only working against them collectively, but conflict also amongst each other. i don't think it will be any different for s2; that there will be something that occurs in this series that will carry the driving emotion into s3.

i truly and honestly hope that i am surprised by the boys not having any conflict between each other (as well as conflict with Other Entities) by the end of s2, and i would love for the opening of s3 to be rooted in solidarity and togetherness between them both, but i just somehow don't feel like it will... but that's my expectation, not a certainty. in any case, regardless of the S2 Angst Debate, this season is again set up for s3, so yes - i think it's guaranteed that all of the threads from s2 will weave together in perhaps the last ten or so minutes, and the final Problem will be revealed as the "dun-dun-dun" moment to propel us into s3.

as for fanservice? id respectfully disagree, and say i don't think it will be fanservice at all. fanservice looks different for different people, and honestly nowhere more than in GO. some people will want certain romantic moments, or certain hurt/comfort moments, angst moments, intimate moments, conflict moments, historical narrative moments... you catch my drift. neil has been pretty adamant that the story and canon is where he takes it, and is pretty upfront that he takes measures to avoid fans' headcanons and fic wherever possible. so actually, if someone's headcanon happens on screen, doesn't that just mean that that someone had the same thought for where these characters were going as neil did when he wrote it? that's not fanservice in my eyes, that's just being on the same wavelength as the author, and that - in my opinion - would be pretty cool.✨

[janelley-fish]

Im starting a fic 😬 I’ve never done anything like this so please be gentle. Writers, I would love any tips and feedback. Please please please. The first 2 chapters are short; but chapters will get longer as I become more comfortable. Be kind please. I’m not a writer, but this story has been in my heart and I just want to share it in hopes that at least one person enjoys it. 💜

Story warnings: angst, very slow burn (mostly Eddie has feelings), friends to lovers, eventual smut, eventual violence and gore, language, some fluff eventually. Think that’s it but overall 18+ so get outta here babies

Unspoken

-Eddie!andoriginalcharacterreader.-

Eddie was your person, in that stereotype kind of way that everyone talks about. You were pretty sure that even if you and Eddie never met in this life, never knew each other, that your soul would search for him, ache for him. You loved him, more than any person could love someone else. More than anyone should. Beyond the meaning of the word, you loved Eddie. And it took one of the most terrible things to happen to make you realize it.

Part 1

Dee, come on. How long does it take to put on lip gloss?” Eddie was standing in the doorway of your bedroom with this arms crossed, leaned against the frame. Honestly, he was being dramatic. He had already made a point of looking at his empty wrist, counting down the minutes out loud until the time you had agreed to leave. He blew his bangs from his eyes and gave you a his most condescending smile, which was still so beautiful. His brows raised high as you scoffed at him.

“It’s called lip stick, and would you calm down? I’m almost done.” You paused to turn around and glare at him. “And if you make one more comment I’m going to make sure you’re wearing some too.” You turned back around to finish with a playful smile and a wink in his direction. Eddie sighed dramatically and walked over to your bed, slumping down into it with a loud huff. You didn’t notice, but his eyes watched your every move as you finished applying your lipstick, his mind wondering what it would be like if you used your painted lips on him, which he was sure was not what you meant, but it was nice to daydream for just a second.

“What are you smirking about?” You had finished your make up and were walking across the room to grab your bag and pull your boots on. Eddie wasn’t aware that he had been smiling to himself at the thought of your lips on his. His cheeks burned red for a moment before he quickly recovered, clearing his throat loudly.

“Just the fact that you’re getting all dolled up for the guys. You know Gareth is going to be flirting with you the whole time, right?” Eddie quirked one brow at you as he stood from your bed, walking over to you so he could lace your boots up. It was probably a weird thing for friends to do, but this kind of stuff was just normal with Eddie. Mundane things that he made special.

He motioned for you to rest your foot on his knee as he bent down. You decided to kick him in the shin instead and he hissed at the sudden contact.

“Jesus Dee; what the hell was that for!?” He scowled at you, but still moved his hands away from rubbing at his black denim covered leg soothingly to tie up your laces.

“Don’t make jokes, Edward Munson, you’re the one who begged me to come to band practice. Claimed you needed my ‘expertise in words’ remember?” The band had been experimenting with new music and Eddie wanted your opinion on his lyrics. He had practically begged on his knees for you to come listen. You almost smacked him for it, because it reminded you of the time he snuck a peak of your journal when you had accidentally left it on your bed.

September 10th, 1981

You and Eddie were heading to meet Steve and Robin to check out the new arcade, but you had demanded that Eddie drive you home first so you could change into shorts, the cool morning air had disappeared and the afternoon had turned hot and sticky. Begrudgingly he drove you home but insisted he come in, because however short you would be, he would not wait in his van. While you rushed to your dresser, you hadn’t noticed the notebook flipped open on top of your smooth purple comforter, and Eddie took it upon himself to snoop. He was looking for something juicy. Maybe embarrassing words about a crush, secretly hoping it was him, but instead found something unexpected and utterly breathtaking. He knew you were into books and poetry, but never knew you wrote your own. And you had planned to keep it that way. Your words were vulnerable, but that’s not what scared you. You couldn’t stand the thought that you could be terrible at something you loved to do so much. It was too terrifying to possibly face a reality where the things you wrote flat out sucked. So you planned to keep all of that part of yourself locked away until someone worth it had discovered that part of you. You weren’t expecting it to be so soon, and you definitely weren’t expecting it to be Eddie fucking Munson.

He was completely lost in your words. Drowning in the beauty of the deep dive into your mind that no one had seen before. The details in the way you explained normal, every day feelings. The way your words made the white paper and black ink ignite into an array of colors in Eddie’s mind as he continued reading. It was like your words had opened an entirely new universe. You stood there frozen; fuming, and he hadn’t noticed. It took you stomping over to him with your hands balled into fists, snatching your notebook from his hands, and shoving him onto the bed before he came back to earth. He saw the heat in your face, but didn’t take it as the anger it was until your eyes burned holes into his and tears started streaming down your cheeks.

“Dee, I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting it to be—I just thought… but it’s beautiful and, wow I-“

“Stop.” You were shaking with embarrassment and anger, maybe slightly at the compliment he gave but you wouldn’t admit that. He could see how much it upset you, he could sense that he went too far. He took your hand in his and stood up, but crouched his head down so he was eye level with you.

“I’m so sorry. Truly. I fucked up and crossed a line. It’ll never happen again.” He blurted the words out, and you could see the look in his eyes. He was meant it.

You stood there holding his hand in one of yours while the other clung your journal to your chest. You let out a sigh and looked up to the ceiling.

“Just promise me you won’t tell anyone. And please, for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT bring this up again or so help me Munson I will drive that precious van of yours straight into Lovers Lake without a second thought.” Eddie winced but let out a small huff of a laugh at the way you joked, relieved at the small sign that you didn’t hate him. He let your hand go and made a dramatic show of drawing a very crooked plus sign over his chest.

“Cross my heart. I would never. And even if I would, that threat would stop me. I could never let anything happen to my girl. We’ve been through too much together.” You let out a chuckle at the thought of him referring to his van as his girl, knowing full well his girl was that guitar hanging so neatly on his bedroom wall. He slumped back down into your bed while you rushed to the bathroom to change, desperate to read more of your words but not wanting to ever risk hurting you again. So he mentally reminded himself of his promise to never bring it up.

February 16, 1983

Until 3 days ago when he begged you to come with him to practice to listen to his new song, babbling about how there was no one better at words than you and how he needed your expert opinion. He was about to keep going when he realized his mistake and snapped his mouth shut, giving you a pleading look that was begging for forgiveness the moment the words slipped out. If it hadn’t been for his big beautiful chocolate eyes, you would have kept on your promise. But you knew he didn’t mean it, and you actually really liked tagging along for practice, so you agreed.

Eddie smirked at your words while he finished lacing your boots up.

“Oh please, sweetheart. I know you just have a thing for rockstars.” He stood up straight and pretended to play his guitar while whipping his long curls around and winking at you. You in turn pretended to fan yourself at his show, and both of you burst into giggles and you stepped out of the room. One of your favorite things about your friendship with Eddie is that it always came natural, every part of it. Nothing was ever weird for you, even after the journal incident, it was just so easy being his friend. Joking and teasing, but also sharing in the dark moments, like when Jason beat the shit out of Eddie just for looking at him wrong, and Eddie got into his feelings too deep about being an outcast. Or when you found your now ex-boyfriend Scott making out with a cheerleader in the woods, and Eddie let you camp at his trailer and made you nachos while you cried into his chest. It was just unspoken, how much you cared for each other. Best friends didn’t cover it, it was more than that.

To Eddie it was much, much more than that.

End of chapter 1

*thanks for reading! Chapter 2 will be up soon.😉

[eepwtf]

Sometimes I dislike the fact that emojis look different across devices, like you think you've left a cute one and then switch to your phone and omg its ugly! lol, i think it's long overdue that I link myself with something more identifying than "N e ways" sooooo berry? blue?blueberry anon? yay? nay? ah okay. I find myself in yet another yapping mood and I've kept quiet about dexter for far too long! I recently got into but find myself procratinating ever since I got to the debra arguing with dex over the blood test he ordered to see if the dead guy really was his father. Like, I love Debra, but her being deeply upset with Dex wanting answers seems so... unnatural? Like the writers just needed to cause tension between the two in front of other people? Like, Harry (like most parents) lie to their children to protect them in their own way, but Dexter is a grown man who can handle more conflicting things than he could as a child. He literally works with dead people and blood for a living, he has the right to know about his past if he wants to. Idk why they made the scene so focused on Deb, to me it made no sense. I feel like they could have gone a different route, espeically since Deb is hooked on Brian and wants people to believe he's "the one" like this is it for her, he's real and he's going to stay. Dexter not having faith in their relationship could have been a bit better if they needed conflict. just ughhhh im probably too in my head about this but its hard to go back when I just wanna skip to the next scene. I felt so bad for Deb in the first few episodes. I get that it's dramatized, but LaGuerta saying "I didn't recognize you with all your clothes on"- or something along those lines made me break my neck so fast. HELLO??? WORKPLACE HARRASMENT?? And yall just gone let that slide, espeically that being said by someone with a higher position. HR? That woman, right there. 🫵 like, not too much on Debra, its actually so sick how they breezed over that, and she was so scared to even speak. Also, I knew spoilers before hand but throughout the whole Ice Truck Killer case I kept thinking about how the Criminal Minds crew woulda been had this case wrapped up. If you think about how the bodies were dismembered and follow the clues, it wouldn't be a reach to say the killer most likely worked at a medical facility, considering it was obvious he had medical knowlege. Dexter even pointed out how the cuts on the bodies looked surgical. The killer also was able to get his hands on nitrogen- not to mention antibiotics that he used to keep Tucci alive. Garcia woulda did her thanggg, and maybe Debra's tip about the car woulda helped. Spencer might of even suggest that the unsub likely worked in an area involving amputations. They also would have easily guessed Neil Perry was a wannabe who was unorganized and didn't fit the profile.

Okay, i really do need to go to sleep 😭 maybe I'll finish the episode im on one day, i really want to stay with it. -🫐

blueberry anon it is! (also, you’re so real for the emoji thing—it’s like emoji roulette every time you switch devices.)

now, onto the absolute goldmine that is your dexter commentary:

first of all, i totally agree about the whole debra vs. dexter blood test argument. like... what? it felt so out of character for deb to get so heated over something that was clearly important to dexter. you’re absolutely right—he’s a grown man, not some fragile kid who can’t handle the truth. if anything, you’d think deb would be more curious or supportive given her own daddy issues and the fact that she’s so emotionally invested in family. but no, they needed to throw in some forced conflict, and for what? to have an audience for their argument? and your idea of tension coming from dexter not having faith in her relationship with brian would��ve been way more compelling and natural for the story. missed opportunity!

and don’t even get me started on laguerta’s “i didn’t recognize you with your clothes on” comment. the whiplash i got the first time i heard that—hello? the way they glossed over that made me want to scream. poor baby just took it because laguerta is her superior, but that line was just so ick. like, why did they have to do deb so dirty in those early episodes? (i hate laguerta she gets on my nerves)

btw! the criminal minds crossover idea??? now i can’t stop imagining garcia piecing together clues, spencer analyzing the surgical precision and medical connections, and hotch putting all the pieces together in record time. neil perry wouldn’t have even had a chance to be a distraction because they would’ve seen right through him instantly. the BAU team would’ve had brian’s whole background and motive pinned down before dexter even realized his brother was the ice truck killer. honestly, that crossover needs to exist immediately.

as for staying with the show—i get it. some parts are hard to sit through when you’re just itching to skip to the next big reveal or when a scene rubs you the wrong way (looking at you, forced deb drama).

anywho,,, i hope you manage to get some rest soon, and please feel free to drop more of your thoughts anytime. your commentary is everything!