#im not gonna finish this. i know im not. i do not have that kind of art stamina right now theres a reason i dont usually animate

[starkeynation]

Hi, pookie !!🎀 could you maybeee write something like mean!rafe being rough rough when doing it, taking all his anger out on us but it becomes too much and it hurts way too bad that we have to say the safeword (doesn't matter what word) so he immediately switches from mean!rafe to soft!rafe (lmao idk how to explain this very well sorryy) pls pls? Btw I luh ya lovey dovey pooks୨ৎ

english isn't my first language lol so I'm sorry if there's any grammatical mistakes in what I said😭🙈

HIII IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. I wasn’t planning on to accept request since I’m only confident to write by my own ideas and just like this one, i’m scared I will procrastinate so much that it will take me too long to start writing. But since this is my first request and we’re mutuals so why not🤩 So THANKYOU SM for sending one and I appreciate you sm! Hope this meets your expectations and im sorry if it dont🥺

Safe word : Red

Masterlist

It is 3AM on a Friday night. You had fallen asleep on your couch while waiting for Rafe to finish his work. He promised to come to you straight after taking care of his business but he didn’t say he was gonna be late. Suddenly, you’re jolt awake by the loud slam of the door.

“Rafe..?” You murmur, blinking in confusion as you stare at the silhouette that just enters your dim lit living room.

“Shit…sorry, go back to sleep” Rafe says, as he walks down to your kitchen.

You take a glance at the clock hanging on your wall and follows Rafe to the kitchen. He is rummaging through your fridge, looking for god knows what. “Rafe, what are you doing?” you ask, looking at him as he continues making a mess.

“Im just trying to make a sandwich,” he replies. The way his voice blurs and the way he’s struggling to stand straight, you know he’s drunk. “It’s past 3, Rafe,” you say, your tone sounds a bit annoyed and confused as why your boyfriend is back home late and wasted.

“What? Can’t i make damn a sandwich at night?” He says, his eyebrows frown and his voice irritated. That’s not what you meant, you thought. But, you know you can’t have this talk right now cause he’s really out of it.

You sigh, “just…go sit okay, I’ll make the sandwich,” you murmur, grabbing the bread from his hand.

“Aww you will? You’re so kind baby, thank you,” he says, and proceeds to place multiple kisses on the back of your head, your temple, your cheek and now down to your jaw and your neck. “Mmmph…i need you baby,” he whispers, still dropping sloppy kisses all over you.

“You’re drunk.”

“Please baby,” he murmurs, grabbing your chin and pulls you in for a kiss. The kiss slowly starts to deepen and become intimate. You know you should tell him to sleep, get some rest, but the way he’s biting your lip, and how he taste so damn good even with the mixture of alcohol, you just couldn’t resist.

You wrap your hands around his neck, he grabs your waist and lifts you up. Your legs wrapped around his torso as he carries you upstairs to your room without breaking the kiss.

He drops you on the bed, helps you take off your nightgown and harshly push you to lay back. You gasp at his eagerness. He starts undressing himself and his lips crash onto yours again. The kiss is now rough and fill with desperation. He breaks the kiss and latches his lips onto the sensitive skin of your neck, the gentle pressure quickly turning into a heated suction, leaving a faint blush on your neck that slowly turns into a dark purple mark.

“Baby can you suck me?” He asks, as he pulls away from your neck. He gives you that slight pouty and doe eyes look. Again, how could you resist. So you nod to him as a yes and sits on the side of your bed as he stands up.

You start stroking his hard dick and place some kisses on his tip. After a few licks and teasing, you take his bulge into your mouth.

Rafe rolls his eyes in ecstasy, “fuck…yeah princess just like that,” he growls. He grabs your head and forces you take in all his length. “Good girl, who knows your pretty little mouth could take daddy’s huge cock so well huh,” he smirks. Your eyes start to become teary as you try your best not to gag while he deepens his cock in your mouth. At this point, he’s practically fucking your throat.

But he isn’t done. He takes out his dick and pushes you back on the bed. As he gets on top of you, he flips you around making you lie on your stomach. He then reaches his palm to your mouth, “spit,” he commands. You do.

He wipes your saliva on your entrance and takes you from behind. He thrust you without a warning making you moan out loud.

“Shit you’re always so tight,” he groans. He starts picking up the pace and each thrust are so deep in. As his hip clasps against your butt, he spanks it twice, harshly, leaving an immediate red mark on your ass. “You like this you dirty whore?” He murmurs, his voice deep and low.

Then, one of his hand wraps around the back of your neck and the other firmly grips your wrist. He’s harshly pressing down your neck while maintaining the pace making a tear escapes your eye and stings as it settles on your cheek.

The way he bury his cock in your throat, calling you a whore and fucks you so roughly, you know he’s angry and had a bad night. As a good girlfriend, you thought you could just let him take out his anger on you and help him take the edge off. But, it’s starting to hurt really bad now.

“Rafe…stop,” you whine.

“Stop…” he still doesn’t listen.

“Rafe! Red! Red!” You shout, your voice strained as you beg him to stop. Red is the safe word you and Rafe agreed to use way before this if the sex ever get too much, though, you never had to use it until now.

Rafe finally comes to his senses and realises that you’re in pain so he stops immediately. “Shit, baby are you ok? Fuck I’m sorry,” he says as he gets you off and looks at you full with concern.

You turn around, revealing your teary eyes and you push away his chest, “What the fuck Rafe? That hurts,” you sobs, your voice cracks.

“Im sorry, I’m so sorry,” he says as he wipes off your tears and cups your face. “Shit I don’t know what i was thinking..I shouldn’t have done that while i was drunk,” he continues. He pulls you in for a hug next. You try to break loose but he wouldn’t let you go.

“Please sweetheart, I’m so sorry. It’s just- i had a bad night, but i know i shouldn’t take it on you,” he apologises again, “God, I’m such an asshole..please forgive me.”

“Yeah, good that you’re aware,” you scoff. He grabs your shoulder and break the hug. “Please baby, I swear it won’t happen again..i love you, you know that…I’m really really sorry,” he says, his tone sincere, you know he’s telling the truth. “Look at me please,” he says, placing both of his hands on your cheek.

Eventually, you look at him in the eyes, in your dim dark room you still manage to see his crystal blue eyes. Of course, you could never stay mad at him. “I forgive you Rafe. But promise me you won’t crash out like this again,” you say, your voice slightly trembles from the cry you had.

“Yes! Yes, i promise,” he replies, pulling you back in into his arms. He kisses your forehead then to your temple, “I love you baby,” he whispers. “I love you too Rafe,” you say as you melt into his arms.

“So…you wanna talk what happened today?” You ask, breaking the silence. He lets out a soft sigh, “it’s just my dad again…but, I don’t want to talk to about it tonight. Let’s just go to sleep hmm?” He murmurs.

You whisper okay for a response and cuddle him to sleep for a comfort. Maybe tomorrow you’ll know the reason why he’s so stressed out.

Dividers from @rafeyscurtainbangs

Another A/N: honestly guys idk if im good at smut..i prefer to stick with angst but my sex tape is almost at 1000 notes so who knows🤓

[barblaz-arts]

Hello!

I would like to start with the fact that your art style is amazing, same goes for the design of the characters. (They look yummy tbh)

I have been wondering if you ever got some kind of art block, if yes what did you do?

If you see this, I hope you have a great day.

Thank you!

Most of the time, when I wanna draw but cant quite know WHAT i wanna draw, I redraw stuff. Like, screenshots. Or old drawings. Or even memes. Those are especially fun for drawing expressions I might not usually draw. Or I take scenes from fics I like or fics I've written and draw them. It helps that I get to move my pen with only half the brain power needed to picture what I want drawn.

But sometimes when I really cant overcome it, I usually just wait it out. Do my other hobbies like read or write or churn up another meta analysis. You cant force yourself to overcome that block sometimes and that's ok.

Oh but sometimes tho! Something that works unintentionally is when I'm like really really upset. I dont like to show it much, bcuz I understand that I'm getting old and I have a significant amount of followers that I dont wanna be a bad example to... But I can have quite a temper on me and can get really petty. But instead of exploding, I try to draw with those feelings.

Like, a while ago, I got really upset about stuff with an AI art fraud. And im just like, you know what this person can claim they're an "artist" all they want, but they still havent even shown a paper drawing as concrete proof. all just excuses and shit. The next moment I drew this, just to reassure myself that I'm an artist and I know what being a real artist is. That unlike AI frauds, I can show I dont need a computer to draw. All I need is a pencil and paper and I'm good.

(Then I proceeded to draw more than I usually do on paper because of that lmao)

And then when Youtooz came with an announcement that they're gonna release four figurines, half of which was 2 versions of Alastor and NO sign of Vaggie, I drew four Vaggies. Yes. I drew all this angry. Until yunno. I got so happy over how nice this ended up looking instead.

And then the last art I posted with the Harem Hotel AU? That's been in my drafts since november but I only got to finish it recently because I got upset over all the people in my notifs leaving hate comments about Vaggie lmao. Just told myself that they can claim to be objective critics who arent misogynistic, but at the end of the day all they could do is leave mean comments on twitter. Meanwhile, I can create! It's borderline horny gay shit, but hey! At least I'm doin' something productive! I can show female characters like her are are worth so much love to the point of making art!

Just. Idk. Maybe next time you feel negative feelings and shit, use art as the outlet for that negativity. Make something out of it. It doesnt have to be pretty, but hopefully it could make you feel good.

Or you know. Like I said, just wait it out.

[reallife6anoufriev6boy6]

artkita necro fic (artyoms version)

includes necrophilia, noncon, predator and prey, extremely mild cannibalism, murder.

note: happy new years everyone! i hope you enjoy this fanfic - it might suck as i started crying halfway through and rushed to finish it. oh well! i tried.

i go hungry every night

not this time around,

not this time around!

im gonna eat you

youre my desire!

im gonna sharpen up my teeth

and build a fire!

artyom stands over nikita, looming over him like some kind of animal.

nikita was laid out in the snow, half his hoodie pulled up with his pants unzipped and blood running down his face accompanied with tears.

it was a pathetic sight. he was pathetic, he was a prey animal in a world full of predators who would eat him alive.

artyom would do just that.

“tyoma, tyoma,” it comes out in sobs, mumbling his nickname “please.” he was disoriented and he barely had a clue what he was saying.

artyom knew though. he was begging him for mercy - to stop playing this game and to just take him home, back to his apartment and take care of him. to wipe the blood off his face and strip him of his soaking wet clothes.

it wasnt a game this time though. most of the time it wasnt, but artyom would get bored. this time though, everything was set in motion.

artyom had brought nikita out here, told him to run and see if he could get away from him, but clearly he couldnt. he would never be able to.

how everything got like this though was a different story. he managed to catch him, of course, shoving him into the snow face first which made his nose bleed. he had tried to take care of his pants, but nikita caught him off guard and he was able to get away.

it wasnt one of his proudest moments, but at least he had him on the ground again.

really, it was nikitas own unmaking. he wasnt careful and had tripped, unable to get up again because he had twisted his ankle in a weird way. just looking at it artyom could tell that it was broken. how he managed to do that? he didnt know.

artyom gets down and kneels over him, watching him shake his head and let out another couple frame wracking sobs.

“tyoma, please,” he begs, but it goes unheard.

“youre fine, nikita.” is all he bothers to reply with, hand coming down to unbuckle and unzip his own pants.

he then grabs nikitas pants, yanking them down along with his boxers. he whimpers once the cold air hits him, squirming in place, wanting to get away from all of this.

it only served to spur the blonde on more, pulling out his cock and running his hand over the length. he lets out a sigh, using his free hand to push nikitas legs apart.

theres a whine of protest, trying to kick his legs and pull them back together, but its no use. artyom settles himself in between them, lining up to him.

“no, no,” he cries, trying to sit up and grab onto artyoms arm “you didnt - you didnt say…” he hadnt told him this was his plan. he wasnt going to tell him, it was more fun if he didnt.

“shut up, nikita,” he hissed, shoving him back down to the ground “just stay still.”

artyom doesnt want to deal with nikitas restlessness, so he shoves right into him with a groan. he struggles to make it work, the other being so tight, but it eventually works out.

it pulls a cry from the boy on the ground, trying to turn his body away but it only made it worse for him.

artyom was sure he mustve had a concussion or something. he wouldve been able to fight a lot better then this in his normal state.

he likes it better this way though. he doesnt have to deal with him complaining or anything - hes just prey on the ground for him to eat.

artyom pulls out, pushing back in with an uncomfortable slide. he tries to get a pace started, a rhythm, but its difficult with how dry and tight he was. he manages to get somewhere, going painfully slow.

it was more so for himself then it was for his friend. he didnt want to tire himself out in the process of doing this, that would just be dumb on his part. it would hurt a whole hell of a lot too if he went any faster.

although, his own precum seems to make quick work of the inconvenience. it acts as lube and makes the slide a little easier, pushing and pulling a little quicker, the sound of skin on skin was all to be heard besides nikitas cries.

it was truly beautiful in its own sick, disgusting way. artyom was enjoying himself too much and he had barely started.

this was how it was always meant to be. nikita under him like a rabbit while he tore him apart like a wolf over top.

however, his crying was starting to get on his nerves. he figures now is a better time then any to enact his second half of the plan.

he was wearing one of his own bigger coats today, one that had pockets big enough to hold a hammer.

he reaches into it, pulling it out and holding it up.

“kitja, kitja look at me.” he huffed, seeing as the boys head turned. the sight made his breath hitch - he had blood smeared across his face and there were tears rolling off his cheeks, his eyes were glassy and unfocused.

“do you see it, kitja?”

“tyoma…”

“tell me you see it.”

he waves the hammer in the air, a dark grin plastered over his face. its like nikita knew what he was going to do because he sobbed harder, begging.

“no, no, tyoma, tyoma,” he sounded pathetic, so sheepish and desperate for his wasted life to be spared “please, no, no,” it was a string of pleas and begs, none of which went answered in the way he wouldve liked.

“why not? give me a good reason.”

he just shook his head, far too dizzy and confused to give him a proper answer.

“dont make me do it.”

“tyo - ma,” he says it drawn out, breathing quickening like he were having a panic attack “tyoma…”

artyom shakes his head, chuckling. it was unfair, he shouldve given him a fair fight, but when was he ever? he didnt think nikita deserved that.

a second later, artyoms swinging the hammer and bringing it down to nikitas head. it makes a sickening thud, followed by a scream.

it was a bad hit, it didnt do the job on its own.

he pulls it back again, smacking the head back down, again and again and again, listening to the crack of his skull and the wet sound of brain matter. he stops once theres no more sobbing, no more screams, no more begs, nothing.

artyom pulls the hammer back and looks at his work. its even more gorgeous then he couldve imagined. nikita was ugly, but like this he was finally beautiful.

his head was a mangled, ruined mess. it would make any sane person puke at the sight, but it only made artyom want to violate him more.

he lifts the hammer to his mouth and licks the head of it, enjoying the metallic taste of blood and the chunks of matter that stuck to it. it was disgusting, but it was everything.

he dropped the hammer back into the snow, instead holding onto nikitas hips and finally driving into him, fucking him as hard and fast as he wanted.

it was still a little difficult with how tight it was, but his precum had completely coated his dick and made the work ten times easier.

he was even more turned on by the fact that he was dead. he was no longer alive to experience any of this - he would never get to feel it again.

his last moments on this planet were of misery and pain. he could only imagine the pounding in his head and the ache in his nose - the sharp pain in his stomach and back while he fucked him. it was everything artyom couldve wanted.

nikitas life was a waste. he had wasted it on artyom and now artyom had taken it from him, it was only fitting.

he bites down on his lip as he thrusts in particular hard, letting out a muffled groan. it shouldnt have been this attractive to him, but it was. he was a sick man and he would always be that way. he had accepted that a long time ago.

because of this, it *really* didnt take long until he was spilling inside of nikita, hissing through his teeth as he finished.

it was pathetically quick. he was sure if he had done this when nikita was alive he wouldve died himself from the embarrassment, but like this he didnt have a reason to care.

nikita just felt too good like this. it suited him so well. maybe if he had kept his mouth shut and laid still, limp like he was dead, then he wouldnt have actually died. although, artyom still mightve killed him anyway.

artyom slows to a stop and catches his breath, taking his time. a thought runs through his head, a nasty one, but he decides to indulge.

he reached a hand up, sticking it into the mess that was once his friends head. it was still warm, but was significantly colder now because of the snow and air around them. the brain matter was smooth and soft, having a gel like consistency.

he never really played around in his victims heads like this, but this was a special occasion.

he pulls his hand away, inspecting it.

the blood coats his hand like a glove, thick and clinging to his skin - finding its way into the cracks and crevices of his palm and fingers. there were bits of matter that had stuck too.

it shimmered under the setting sun up above, looking just like red paint. it was enticing to say the least.

he lifts his hand to his mouth, dragging his tongue across his palm and fingers, licking up all the blood and matter. it had the same taste as it did on the hammer and the bits of brain were soft and buttery in his mouth.

he never thought hed be the type to eat someones brains, but this was good. it was mildly pleasant and he enjoyed it more then he thought he wouldve.

he doesnt go for seconds though, instead pulling out and stuffing his dick back into his pants. he buckles his belt, zips his jeans, and then is getting up off the ground.

artyom stands over the body of his friend, back to the original position he had just been in about thirty minutes prior. he stares down at him, feeling satisfied, like a wolf who was full.

he didnt feel bad, he felt no pity or sadness. there was nothing to be sad about, nikita had done this to himself.

thats how he would see it. it would always be nikitas fault no matter what. if he ever got caught thats how he would explain it, if not then thats how he would think of it.

he was sure his mother would ask of him. he would tell her he didnt know - that maybe he did something stupid and ran away. he didnt think he would be found anytime soon anyway, they were deep in the woods and far away from where anyone would normally go. his grin softens into a smile, proud. he had really outdone himself.

in life nikita never got any peace, and now in death he wouldnt either. he would always be remembered as artyoms bitch.

he would have no name other then that. no meaning, no significance, just artyoms bitch. only people who deserved names got to keep theirs, nikita didnt deserve it.

he did nothing to earn it and now he would never get the chance to.

[tbmkit]

A Deep Dive on "The End" of Las Nevadas

to start things off, this is my own interpretation of his dialogue. i explained how i feel about the stream here in this post. going off of that, i am going to break down the way quackity (who, for clarification sake i'll just refer to as alex) interpreted him. this is gonna get into random theories and probably get like, a little personal and im going to sound crazy but im also autistic and super invested with a bunch of free time... but i think the whole way this stream was carried out had a double meaning to it, and i will examine it here. not proofread, we 're going in raw. so, let's begin with...

Section 1: The Different Personalities of the Quackities

for starters, i want to examine the personalities of each character. obviously, im not taking much (aside from a few bits) into account from the other streams. this was all carefully crafted in one stream to get each persona down, rather than on-the-fly acting. each one has a sort of "archetype" to dissect.

q!quackity, who is quiet, reserved, skittish - yet smart and observant. he uses longer words, and spends more time observing the conversations, then jumping in for the "kill"

k!quackity, who is battered from the betrayal hes gone through, he feels hurt yet he doesnt feel anger. its internalized, he doesnt trust the others, however he mentions that they need to build trust to get out of the "cube"

ln!quackity, who is extroverted, boisterous, the physical incarnate of a bruised ego. he holds his head high not realizing his neck is always exposed, ready for someone to rip him to shreds if they hit the right vein. he's an asshole, making fun of the others, holds himself proudly on his achievements. but he's the only one that cries. q!quackity is anxious, but he doesn't cry. ln!quackity does.

and... alex. a self-proclaimed introvert, who is kind and observant, who forces himself to get out of his comfort zone, something he called a "finish line." a writer, a director, someone who loves telling stories. and this one, happens to be a story of different personas of his, with one being killed off.

and with that, we get into the topic of what i believe the stream represents. if you'll join me for a long read, i think this stream represents his growth as a person and a content creator, in a very extreme and especially vulnerable way.

Section 2: Pre-Quackities Dialogue

an interesting point about ln!quackity is that his dialogue is very turbulent. he goes from being confident to anxious and scared in a moment's notice.

from...

Slime! Was this you? Did you do this? I didn't mean to do this- the the.. I wasn't… malfunction! An explosive went off! I don't know where I am! I might've done some [stupid] stuff, but it's not- it's not fair to pin it on me. You saw it- you saw it- you saw what everyone did to me…

at first, he's very confused. a topic he brings up later is how he always wins, or rather how the house always wins. he succeeded in killing himself, thus the surprise. he didn't really mean to succeed, he thought he'd fail just like all the other times. that's what he's used to.

then...

I don't know who you are, and you certainly don't know who I am either. […] If you have any answers for me, just let me know, please. Alright fine- whoever put me here, get me out! Or just kill me! That was the point of what I was trying to do!

his ego pops in - "you certainly don't know who i am either" weighing his importance. he can't die, he's just so vital for his country. his carefully crafted country. but he can't stand not knowing what actually happened - did he finally succeed? for once in his entire life? no, surely not. he wants to get out - he didn't really mean to kill himself. just one more chance, he wants. but if he can't have one more chance, he just wants it to be over. either keep fighting and fighting or finally give up, even if you just succeeded for the first time in your life.

finally to...

We can make a deal, alright? Let's do a little bit of gambling, let's make a deal! […] You let me out of here, I… do you want me to do good deeds? I'll do good deeds! […] I'll do it, just let me go… just give me a sign…

"ha! gambling, casinos, money! that's my personality! you guys know me, mr. casino man! ring any bells yet?? you guys know that's what i'm all about!" he cries. that's where his power is held - material possessions, easy wins, his comfort zone. something he can easily control. he tries to paint himself as a "better" version of himself by offering his material possessions, anything to save his ass. something he can live without, something he's comfortable losing because he'll just gain it back double in the end.

Section 3: Pre-Monologue

the first thing ln!quackity says to k!quackity - apart from being taken aback by being called a gringo - is

A foreigner?! Where are you from?

now this might come off as one of the farther reaches in this post, but i feel like this was mean to represent ("this" as in, the way ln!quackity treats k!quackity as a whole) the switch to spanish content that alex did. i feel like ln!quackity is very offput by k!quackity because it was a hard switch for alex to make, given how people in the public - and in private - treated this switch. throughout the stream, ln!quackity treats k!quackity with ambivalence - not with hatred or disgust, but also with an underlying fearful tone - as he does not understand him when he speaks spanish. however, ln!quackity does speak spanish. he spoke spanish all the time. hell, the casino is called el palacio (which you can see on the signs inside), we got el rapids, mexican l'manburg, flirting with schlatt... this is just a front. he just doesn't want to communicate, even acknowledge him speaking to him. his ego gets in the way, not wanting to acknowledge this. q!quackity does not speak spanish, this was clear given the lore of qsmp with elquackity. however, ln!quackity is known as bilingual. so why would he try to hide that part of him? you tell me.

You see? I was also betrayed! And actually I was the one doing the torturing, but I have the better story here.

"hah look at me im so badass! who gives a fuck if you went through so much shit! i also did that shit but to someone else! that also kinda happened to me but who cares!" says the deeply traumatized individual who perpetuates a cycle of abuse.

Tone it fucking down. You don't know who you're speaking to.

he says this directly after being called out by the other two. he, again, deems himself as more important. he's the badass one, he's the one that is more "successful," he gets all the fame and credit. thus, when someone tries to tell him that he's full of shit, he immediately puts up his defenses - the ones he's been crafting for all his life, through the endless amount of trauma he's gone through. did he ever back down? show emotions? no, he hasn't. he's always just been a powerhouse. even when his friends and partners betrayed him, he used that to fuel his drive, not knock him down.

I win. That's my job. My job is to make people think they win. I'm a multimillionaire because I run an extremely successful casino business. I also am the president of the richest country in my world. But you know, the more success, the more people want to kill you. And if I'm here right now it's because they succeeded - although I do think the people responsible might be dead soon as well, because if I truly am dead, then they fucked up. So yeah I'm not worried about it at all. Just a bunch of cowards that stormed my casino, probably shot me, they'll get caught.

here he goes again, flaunting his achievements. whenever someone tries to wiggle through the cracks of his ego, he spits out the same recycled speech about his achievements. everyone wants him, everyone wants what he has. but does he truly want it all? is it to make up for what he had lost, or maybe it's to hide his emotions or his insecurities? will they all be drowned out by material possessions? "the more success, the more people want to kill you," so, himself, since that's who killed him in the end? with how much he's been gaining, does that mean that his will to live dwindled too as he got everything he ever wanted? but of course, this is all one big lie to cover up the fact that he was the one with a bounty on his own head.

Q!Quackity: If you are as successful as you say you are, I would imagine that you would already be on edge for someone trying to kill you. […] so how exactly did you inflict your own death?

bonus! with the context above, i feel like q!quackity picked up on his suicidal tendencies, and is thus asking, "hey, since you have it all and i kiiinda feel like we all killed ourselves here, and you said the more successful you are the more people wanna kill you, doesn't that mean you wanna kill yourself?"

Section 4: The Monologue

Fine. You wanna know how I got here? I fucking destroyed it all, I fucking did it. I fucking did it. I sat on my fucking throne and I lit it all on fire and it was fucking beautiful. You know why? Because you can't trust nobody. You can't fucking trust nobody. Alright… alright… I come from a world where you can't trust nobody. Your neighbour will backstab you for a piece of bread if he has to. There are no friends where I came from, okay? And people will sell you out in a fucking second. I tried it all, I tried politics, I tried businesses, and I never won. You know what made all those fail? You know what made every fucking attempt of mine fail? Trust! You can't trust people! They will kill you! So if I can't win, I did what I had to do.

the first half of the monologue is all about being betrayed. "how did i get here? / i destroyed it all / it was beautiful" for someone who prides himself in his material possessions, this doesn't feel like he'd be happy about getting rid of it all. his entire country, what he loved. las nevadas is his comfort zone. that's why he was confined to it, he never left, nobody entered, truly. sure he had some of his friends, but they betrayed him in the end. he ended up hurting them and they left, or they hurt him regardless.

this is where alex comes into play. this monologue was intentional, this was raw and vulnerable. it represents ln!quackity, yes. but, underlying is alex throughout it all. it's not a hidden fact that he's had a lot of people that ended up betraying him, and others in his life as well. so many people took advantage of his trust and kindness. they wanted to commodify him, use his fame, get a bit of clout, get his money, all for themselves. ln!quackity didn't want to be on top of the world, he rose so high up that from below everything looks so small and lost sight of where he was. this represents the ego. it's so easy for your ego to get ahold of you, but when you're so high up, you get knocked down, all the way to your death...

I fabricated my wins, I created my own country, I built my circumstances. Me! Nobody else! Because nobody else thinks like I do! Nobody can! So there comes a point where it's over, at some point you fucking lose.

the aforementioned fall. las nevadas was his comfort - the only place where nothing could go wrong. everything went his way, and only his. the house always wins, it's his comfort zone. he crafted it himself. "nobody else thinks like i do / nobody can" represents his internal struggle. his insecurities that he had to build four walls and a roof over, hidden away from sight in a city of different buildings. he thinks hes the only one that feels this way, he doesnt think anyone can feel the amount of pain he does. life is a chore for ln!quackity, he chugs through it and never once could he rest. but, he finally got to. and now that he has it all... what else is there left? his insecurities and shame that he trapped himself in with all this time. he's forced to sit with them, ponder, grow attached to them yet still hide them from everyone. nobody can know how he feels, nobody can know what he thinks. he never opened up, he never got in touch with his emotions and thus

My partner, my great business partner… I built him, piece by piece, I gave him the personality that I wanted! He learned from me, he is who he is because of me! Yet he has the audacity to abandon me? To abandon what I built? To defy me? He called me a bad person and guess what? I am a bad person. And I'll fucking own it til the day I die. Everything gets destroyed, I'm not gonna wait for a fucking traitor to put me in my grave, that's my JOB. So yeah, I inflicted it, I'm here because of me. I'm here because of me, nobody else. *starts crying*

this is where it gets tricky. my personal interpretation that fits with the theme is that slime represents alex. ln!quackity - or rather, his ego - molded slime into what he is - a copy of ln!quackity. a hollow imitation of the ego. ln!quackity made slime into precisely that. he was a blank slate, he had so much power over him, and thus he finally had someone who could think like him, without the pain that ln!quackity felt because slime felt none. not until ln!quackity hurt him - his own ego hurt alex, in this sense. the fame, his career had hurt him.

"to abandon what i built / to defy me" taking a step back to keep your ego in check, to finally realize what matters in life, is an act of defiance. to humble yourself, to realize you're nothing more than a person that feels hurt by his environment (calling back to: "I might've done some [stupid] stuff, but it's not- it's not fair to pin it on me. You saw it- you saw it- you saw what everyone did to me…" which he said when he was alone, begging for his life, for a second chance to go back to where he felt safest) it was such a strong revelation that it made ln!quackity cry. finally, he could cry.

ln!quackity, in his own eyes, is perfect. he's what everyone wants to be. money, fame, achievements... but the moment he realizes hes hurt he comes back down from his pedestal. he's not the badass everyone wants him to be, he's not the king of the land, he's scared and sensitive. he just wants to be loved, but every time he is, he gets hurt. so why love when you can hurt? that's why he's so rude and abrasive. because why love when hurting is easier? hurting is the norm, hurting is comfort. las nevadas is a nation that encapsulates nothing but pain.

Where do you guys think you are? What is this to you, just a little game? Just a little more entertainment? Look around us, look at this, look at this sick joke, we're puppets! They think it's real! None of this is! And maybe that's the game, we just need to play it! Who's it gonna be, huh? What am I meant to do? How do I win today's game? I'm not gonna give these bastards a show, I want out!

obligatory "who do you think we're actually talking about here?" fourth wall-breaking segment. you should be able to piece it together here. ln!quackity doesn't want to be part of the show anymore - q!quackity and k!quackity run it now.

Section 5: Post-Monologue and Closing Thoughts

Oh my god, oh my god… Okay… I'm alive- I'm alive… I'm alive, I'm alive… What am I doing? What am I doing? Okay… I need to… I need to leave, I need to get out of here, I need to walk out, I need to walk out…

wait, ln!quackity is alive? he's not hurt? he's... alive? hm. that must've all been in his head. a near death experience, some divine intervention... maybe he does get a second shot! "i need to get out of here..." he wants to get out of the comfort zone, but... letting the ego out, where he's going to suffer? let ln!quackity, the character built on legacy, suffer in a place where he has nothing? the outside? where he wouldn't even dare to-

Slime: Looks like everything is running well. Yeah. Everything's going pretty… pretty great. Slime: You look so tired. I uh… yeah, yeah I uh, I am. Slime: I came back to see you one last time. I didn't like how we had to end. Yeah, no uh… I thought about it, no hard feelings and you know what… you were right actually, this time you taught me some valuable lessons. Slime: After I left, I learned a lot. More than I ever thought there was to know. From more people that I ever thought there were. That sounds great. Slime: I came here to say goodbye, Quackity. It felt… important. Where are you going? Are you going somewhere? Slime: I want to go see it, Quackity. Everything belong this land. I don't think I belong here anymore. Wow, yeah. You deserve it, wow… look at you. Traveling the world, I'm excited for you. Slime: I've learned all I can from this place, Quackity. I'm very excited to go. And maybe even now, someone or something can learn from me. Wow, well yeah. Stay uhm, stay safe man. And remember, don't trust too many people. Slime: Quackity, thank you for teaching me what it's like to be human. Yeah… thanks. Slime: Goodbye, Quackity from Las Nevadas.

he realizes the pain is what makes people alive. you can reconcile with it, you can embrace it, you can live with it. slime was confined to las nevadas for so long that he learned how to live. why can't ln!quackity? what makes slime different? ln!quackity has been immersed in nothing but pain and suffering... and k!quackity too! q!quackity! they are all fine, they can do amazing things, but... they have nothing. they lost it all, but why was ln!quackity the one that's stuck? why did he finally crack?

it's because they love. and slime, well, he loves the world. he loves learning, teaching about life. he has a passion, he wants to experience life. he wants to be free. ln!quackity never wanted to be free. he wanted a place to call his own. with slime leaving... he has las nevadas all to himself. everything he ever wanted, all the money in the world, yet he's alone. he was never loved, only used. it's just a hollow tomb. it was built as an homage to people he loved, but they never loved him. nor did he love himself. all it stands to be is just a reminder that ln!quackity will never be loved.

"you look... so tired." "yeah... i uh- i am."

he doesn't have to keep fighting. he doesn't have to keep relishing in pain. he's happy that slime is traveling the world, thanks to him. he took bits and pieces of ln!quackity - not everything - but just enough to keep his chin high. he is his own person, using the lessons that ln!quackity taught him. slime is ln!quackity's legacy. after the conversation with his other two selves, and with slime in the real world, he realized that in order for him to be at peace, he doesn't have to keep on hurting. the pain that he shared with slime, as the lessons he taught him, inspired slime to be his own person. the pain that ln!quackity went through is what made slime realize that he, too, is human. relishing in pain and not using that to keep going makes you a victim to your own surroundings. the pain becomes comfort, and you can never leave. it's nothing more than a tomb.

and thus, the final lines said are:

"quackity, thank you for teaching me what it's like to be human." "yeah... thanks"

slime taught him how to be human as well. and to be human is to not let pain consume you and to keep forward. make amends with it, keep it in your back pocket. those are memories, it's part of your legacy. but what the other quackities could do that ln!quackity couldn't, is remind themselves that they can be better.

q!quackity, though skittish in nature, is observant and uses his knowledge to get under ln!quackity's skin and finally make him snap and realize his emotions. q!quackity represents intellect, even if he is naïve at the same time.

k!quackity, just as smart as q!quackity, is a fighter. he is observant, but he doesn't use that as much to his advantage as he has strength to back him up. he is strong and he knows it, he can lead a revolution, he is strategical. less naïve than q!quackity, he's more cautious of the posing threat that ln!quackity is. q!quackity helps him as his first instinct, showing that the two work together in tandem naturally.

with both sides working together in harmony, where does ln!quackity come in? he represents arrogance, denial of his emotions, his bolstering ego... there is no room for that to grow as a person. he had to die. the room falls silent as he kills himself, no protests. and, q!quackity and k!quackity will make it out alive. they will be coming back. which shows that they do work together to get out. not by killing themselves, but allowing themselves the best parts of each other.

so, as a finale... what does this mean as a whole? i think, although alex really loves ln!quackity, i think this stream was meant to show his journey as a person. he has said he is very grateful for what he has and where he's gotten, and i think keeping yourself humble and counting your blessings is something that you have to grow into. when you're young, you do stupid mistakes. you're naïve, you trust too easily and people take advantage of that. at the end of the stream, ln!quackity says

"don't trust too many people"

as opposed to what he said earlier, talking about himself:

"you know what made all those fail? [...] trust! you can't trust people! they kill you!"

without letting people in, ln!quackity was his own demise. he never learned how to trust, how to love, and thus he could only die alone in the end. but, slime can. he will learn how to love, how to care for, and how to trust others. don't be naïve, but don't be alone, otherwise you will be your own demise in the end.

and thus, this stream was a way to show alex's journey as a person. he said that he was really counting his blessings and being thankful for everything in his life. he can't redo the past few years, but he can move forward with the lessons he learned. that's something he has been talking a lot about lately, and i think this was his own way of interpreting it through characters he loves so dearly. he had to kill off his pride to grow. moving on is the hardest part, and what's even harder is learning how to begin again after everything. but, at the end of the year and going into the next, he will face troubles. he will face challenges.

but he will grow and learn, as he is human, as we are human. we all feel pain, as well as love. we need to learn, we need to grow. and we cannot shy these away from each other - they need to balance each other out and work in unison, as they should.

[kaiserouo]

can i get on his shoulder if im being annoying enough

[southern--downpour]

damn animation is pretty fun. wish cleanup didnt exist

[bunnieswithknives]

sorry if idk this but what do you think about Wordgirl now in 2024 do you still like it do you still want to make art or talk about it or are you just done with all of it forever and plus i seen that you haven't made art of it since 2022 so you just done with all of it oh yeah and what about The Magnus Archives + Wordgirl ao3 fic too like is that just going to be and i know that your working on 2 au's now just wanting to know that's all

My interests tend to come in intense bursts and then fade. Unless something like, big happens like it gets a reboot its unlikely I'll be coming back to it anytime soon. As for the fic I don't have any current plans to finish it unfortunately.

[ra-vio]

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[littleplantfreak]

gn lovlies I’m gonna go dream about Umemiya getting bit in zombie apocalypse au

[asanjou]

king jeremy with ambiguous sword circa whatever the fuck year

[carcarrot]

google search how was i going to finish the sentence i started writing

[cerealmonster15]

i was lookin at a few vids about the bg3 dream visitor romance [spoilers if anyone's still early game i guess lol] and like i was so shocked people were, like, so upset and betrayed when they discovered the dream visitor's true form fksdjgkdljf like okay i forgot not every corner of the internet has monsterfuckers and also i guess normies are playing this game. and ALSO it reminded me that the % of players that even have the steam achievement of sleeping w/the emperor at all is so low. 12.7%. why is everyone a coward. i'm not even a self proclaimed monsterfucker. i dont like sex and im mildly phobic of tentacles. WHY IS EVERYONE A COWARD!!!!!

tho to be fair probably a lot of ppl are also romancing a companion and wanna be faithful - ive only gotten to that scene in multiplayer where none of us were in companion romances so it was guilt free go for it see what happens, in the discord call all together LOL..... then we had a lover's spat after the raphael fight 😑

[rapidhighway]

girls will try to make figurines but the fucking hedgehog has a giant head that wont say up its so big and heavyyy whyyyy

[ace-with--a-mace]

houses head wilsons heart crushed me wtf doctors...

[shevr]

foundational character for some* millenial french furries

( *me )

[imbeingtauntedbyachild]

Alicia explorations and an attempt at project sekais 2d models