#im not explaining this right
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i fucking hate self portraits btw especially when my professors are like make it represent something about yourself 🥰🥰 like fuck youuuuuu
#like.#i dont like representing myself with symbolism and things meaningful to my life like im some fanartists blorbo#like you know????#maybe its bc there isnt a strong attatchment to any aspect of my identity but like#yeah im latina yeah im a lesbian yeah im (insert other aspects of my identity)#but like. these arent prominent aspects of myself? they just are?#like im not a fan of someone being able to look at me and know certain aspects of myself?#im not explaining this right#whatever but i prefer just painting myself as i am#there is no hidden side of me i hide from other people or that others dont see#what you see is what you get and the idea of posing myself is weird#like thats not me i dont present myself in some specia or exaggerated way#like i said what you see is what you get is who i am#like you dont know me and putting up personal aspects of myself in some symbolic way for a painting is eugh#ot even the mortifying ordeal of being known bc you DONT know me#you just see a painting of myself but you dont know me from that#you can guess but that doesnt mean you know me#idk i dont think i said my thoughts properly but whatever i hate self portraits#i am tired of painting my face#michi tag
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filipina miku!! my mom helped me with her outfit ^_^
#THIS TOOK ME FOREVER RAAHHHH#i had help from my mom with stuff like the parts of the traje de mestiza which is the outfit shes wearing#this trend looks so much fun and i wanted to join in.. im first gen canadian though so ive never been to the philippines and only#know thru stories of my parents growing up. im proud of my heritage but there are some things i didnt grow up with that#make me feel disconnected from my culture. so it was nice to talk to my mom abt it and ask for her help with this :3#the pleated tapis is meant to resemble her skirt.. i had no way of adding her stockings but i noticed the piano key design#so i used that for the saya. the bandana is meant to resemble her hairties and shes wearing bakya wooden slippers with embroidery#i kinda wanted to add the panuelo to resemble her tie as a finishing touch but i forgor ;w; just imagine it i guess#my mom really likes this. shes a little confused abt the blue hair and i had to explain her hair is like that but she thinks shes pretty#originally i wanted her holding the woven pamaypay and fanning herself because ITS HOT ITS 25 FUCKING DEGREES TODAY#but i couldnt get the pose right so i settled for this. i wanna draw her and brazilian miku high fiving ill do that tmrw#my art#myart#hatsune miku#miku worldwide#philippines#vocaloid#miku
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#i used to be a lil more patient with it and ask like. why do you use *your* pronouns? you like em. right? but ive realized that explaining#myself over and over to ppl who (for the most part) will continue to not understand is exhausting#so. nyways. im gonna start linking people who ask this post#i use it/its for lots and lots of reasons but the one You need to know is because I Want To#anyways! hi! hello! i'm mostly moved in and the bugs are mostly dealt with#posts will be mainly comm work and lil mspaint doodlies for the time being#but#helllooooooo#:03 its been awhileee#oc: cow#fursona#mspaint mouse doodlie
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The tac net crash chapter is one of my favorites so far~
Ah and. Guess what. I just discovered that including this post, I made 50 pieces of fanart for Mistakes on mistakes until.. I’m so sane and normal about this story can you tell👍
#maccadam#transformers#fic fanart#momu fanart#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#considering the speed and the amount of fanart#….yeah I can see why tumblr thought I was a bot lmao#also#I mostly read during night and then drawing from memory during day so uhhhhh the accuracy is questionable haha#mainly I feel like half of the time I don’t know how tf Jazz looks. The guy switching between his looks so often jdjfjfj#IM. SO GLAD THEY RESOLVED THEIR DRAMA EHEHBJGJ#The scene in medbay was so damn cute#oh my goddddd#the scene of the tac net crash#muah#loved it~#you know the thing is - I'm a biiiig fan of mutual feelings and actions#the scene of the kiss was absolutely great but it was a bit one sided#Jazz cared about Prowl but Prowl was far more concerned about information safety and strategy and stuff#but this?? mmmm~ Them caring for each other#Prowl using his last moments of consciousness to ask Jazz if he is mad at him#Prowl actually deeply caring of what Jazz thinks about him now when he knows Prowl killed his friends#i don't know how to explain#kisses are great but this (points) this is my favorite five star meal right here#also there is something so funny about Prowl slowly discovering fow fucked up Jazz is and just accepting it#but being so scared when Jazz discover how fucked up he is. Only for Jazz to be like “boo I knew about your fuckedupness from the start”
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How did your meeting go with the surgeons?
it was memorable
#sci speaks#the sci files#im glad i've done all the research. i feel okay. i feel safe and confident. and the doctors have all been really kind and helpful.#lots of good vibes. and they're moving me through the system so quickly. i'm glad it'll be dealt with so soon.#feels so crazy that this has been going on. right under my skin. and it's all explained now and i feel so much more in control.#i know whats going on!! with my funky body!! no more unanswered questions!!#i feel really good these days. optimistic. i feel like i understand myself a lot more and it means i'm better to myself.#but you'll all have to be patient with me. please be patient with me like i've learnt to be patient with myself.
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crackfic idea: obi-wan and anakin and ahsoka joke about how obi-wan is old all the time but cody doesn't really get how age works for most beings (esp in the gffa where there's a million different lifespans) so he takes it at face value and starts treating obi-wan like he's elderly. gives him supplements, talks about fall risks, the troopers start asking him what life was like when he was a kid
(also, cody: I'm gonna fuck that old man)
#eventually obi-wan is like you know im 36 right please tell me you know that#*clones blink in not understanding aging*#and he has to explain hes not even middle aged yet and brings out stewjoni life expectancy charts#sw#codywan
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the accolade ( the...the cat-olade...)
#mine#original#i cannot even begin to explain the anguish. the torment. this drawing has brought me#and i STILL dont like it. i simply cant work on it any longer i cant i cant. i must be rid of it#eating drywall as we speak#you want to know how many weeks ive worked on this. THREE. ALMOST.#you want to know how long my other cat drawings take me ?? 3 days absolute MAX#anyway. begon foul creature etc#i havent left extremely long tags for a long while hello everyone good lord there are many of you#we are going stratford this weekend very exciting#its going to be a little chilly and i want to take my new coat with me but issue its not chilly right now so i cant wear it onto the train#i do not think. i can. stuff it into my suitcase i dont think that will happen#i am sure i will figure it out#also. no longer vegan . eggs have won me over. egg egg egg.#im having to restrain myself SO hard from buying more wool i want a shawl i want a shawl#i want more cute DRESSES why are nice comfy dresses 10000£#i look on vinted and its like dresses for popping your pussy in like not. the vibe im going for thank u#anyway. im going to eat crackers now
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head over heels
#nicholas d. wolfwood#vash the stampede#vashwood#trigun#my art#idk how to explain my trigun feelings other than my fav flavor of it being that wolfwood falls hard for this chaotic blonde first#and they proceed to share intricate rituals throughout their travels but never do anything about it#and then vol 10 happens#:]#anyways im a wolfwood falls in love first believer right here#he would do anything for that man
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Look Shen Yuan and Airplane(in leu of his pre transmigration name) are in fact a match made in heaven BUT in any timeline that they up in the same vicinity as Luo Binghe and Mobei-jun they will both mutually pivot to best friends bordering QPR. Because although they might be eachothers types your Ultimate wish fulfilment man trumps the sane version of your ultimate wish fulfillment man every time, in this essay I will-
#do you get what im saying#this is incoherent#i dont know how to explain it#but i know im right#i hope this makes sense#svsss#mxtx svsss#scum villain#scum villian self saving system#scumbag self saving system#scumbag system#scumbag villain#shen yuan#shen qingqiu#peerless cucumber#airplane shooting towards the sky#shang qinghua#luo binghe#mobei jun
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dreamers discuss their shared fate
#actually: frenemies bicker over brunch#i love them >_<#dont mind preliminary designs#just hope i got the ideas across#my art#hollow knight#hollow knight fanart#monomon the teacher#herrah the beast#lurien the watcher#hk monomon#hk lurien#hk herrah#hk fanart#hk dreamers#hollow knight headcanon#im making the eyes dark to recreate the game artstyle#hollow knight gijinka#hollow knight humans#hollow knight humanization#not actually humans#dhjsgfj idk bug people#unpopular herrah interpretation#ill explain ill explain.. !!#lurien STAND UP#monomon is bioluminescent yuh yuh#if thats the right word
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Cregan's a thigh man an ass man a stomach mean-I just think a lady ain't allowed to be insecure around Cregan Stark in general, he has a sixth sense and can tell when his lady wife isn't happy with her body and he suddenly appears and is like "you're gorgeous don't even think that-"
this exactly sums up my thoughts about cregan in a nutshell. he’s not just utterly in love, he’s in love with every aspect of you. walk with me here
the sixth sense comment is so canon it almost hurts. you could just be having one of those days, not feeling confident in yourself or your body. you plan on just letting the feeling pass, but cregans so in tune with you, he can always immediately tell when somethings off.
he’s in tune with his men in the same regard. as a leader, you have to be. if you can’t recognize their strengths & weaknesses, or when they could be a liability, you can’t hope to rule. such is plain and simple.
and that only concerns his men. you’re his wife, his other half — whom he swore to & cloaked under his protection in front of the old gods. who would he know inside & out if not you?
he knows the bounce in your legs, and how it means you’re more unsettled than usual. he registers the longer, looser fitting gown you’ve chosen today. he can spot the minimal effort you exude to hide yourself from other people, feeling insecure about something only the gods would ever know. to cregan, you’ll always be perfect.
with this information, he makes it a point to express his love for you (not that you’ve ever lacked it with cregan). pulling you in for a kiss whenever you pass each other during the day, no matter how many times you’ve already met. his hand caressing your thigh under the table as you sup; one would think you did not notice, but the flush of your cheeks betray you. when you’ve retired to your shared chambers for the night, standing & taking off your jewelry, and cregan approaches you. allowing his hands to find purchase on your waist, pulling you to him. he sighs, before pressing a small kiss to your temple. you melt into him.
it’s not sexual, the way his hands caress the slope of your waist, and he drinks in every part of you as if it’s your wedding night once more. you burn under his touch, the intimacy of this moment not escaping you. you know your husband loves you, but still, you can’t help but wonder why he’s taken to you in such a way tonight. (he’s been taken with you in more ways than you can count since your betrothal. he reveals more parts of himself as the days pass)
“Cregan,” you begin. he hums, letting you know he’s listening. “Are you alright?”
“Aye. I cannot enjoy my wife, and the beauty the gods gift her with?”
you hum. “You jest, my love.”
“Am I regarded as a jesting man?”
some might think he took offense, but you can feel the hint of that smile of his as he presses a kiss to the top of your head. he relishes in the content smile he spots on your own lips.
#dippys asks#house of the dragon#cregan stark#cregan stark x reader#cregan stark x you#cregan stark prompt#i don’t know if i explained this right#confiddering im half asleep#but i had to get this out#thanks for coming to my ted talk
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ultimately i think my insistence on aro positivity honestly is as much a political stance as a personal one.
when i say aro positivity is crucial and that i dislike doomer-ist posts that express sentiments like 'I hate being aro so much I wish I was dead instead’ it's not because I don’t think there can and should be a space for negativity and acknowledging self-hate, or the many ways being aromantic can really suck sometimes. i find that to be very important!
that being said. there is smth here about how self-hate posts are sometimes just arophobia that we inflict on ourselves. and when we put that out into the ether it (intentionally or not) can become arophobia that we inflict on other members of the community. i think there absolutely needs to be a place for negativity and the expression of anger and frustration and self loathing even - these are all good things to talk about because these are things that we experience. that being said, it can also be genuinely upsetting and triggering to people to have what is essentially arophobia shown to them and then have that be validated by other aspec people. your personal thoughts can affect your wider community on a level you may not anticipate. and i understand it i truly do! it took me so long to be able to recover from accepting being aroace - it threw my entire world off kilter and made me question everything about my place in the world.
but my insistence on aro joy and positivity is because ultimately i do believe that building is at the core essence of it all. that ultimately discussions and the purpose of community should be about construction, not destruction. and this is both a personal and a political stance. talking about how much you hate yourself and cultivating online discussions/spaces where negativity about aspec identity is the main and only theme is destructive - if that’s where we let the conversation end. these thoughts can and should be used as a vehicle to look for a path forward!
joy and positivity create a space where the focus can become on forging a path forward, on construction, on community building instead of tearing ourselves and others down with negative thoughts. it’s not productive or healthy when it stops at a place of negativity - it becomes actively destructive to the essence of community.
and i do think that this is especially poignant considering the fact that being any kind of queer, but especially aromantic (and/or asexual) means forging a path for yourself and making your own happiness where there is no obvious way forward. our communities exist mostly online (right now, anyway), there is little recognition of our existence in the real world, the effects of amatonormativity are both pervasive and actively dehumanising, and there are legal, economic and social structures in place actively making our lives more difficult. yes that all sucks! it’s good to acknowledge that. we need to in order to change it. but more importantly, that’s not the end. we are still here and our happiness, our future is for us to determine. even if we can’t change the laws or society, loving yourself and understanding aromanticism as a political identity (as well as personal), as a radical worldview, and as a protest against amatonormativity is essential for both community and personal well being. the personal is political.
tldr. i guess my point is that as a community, we should focus on building, improving, and nurturing ourselves and each other (construction) as opposed to destruction. we should recognise aromanticism and asexuality as political identities as well as personal ones and rely on community and self-love in the absence of anything else as a form of protest and political power. destruction (the recognition of everything that is wrong) is essential as a starting point - but where do we go from there? we rebuild.
#aromantic#aro positivity#aspec#aroace#aro#aromantic joy#arospec#when i saw its important to 'love' yourself - pls understand i am in no way trying to exclude loveless aros from this#that was just the easiest way to express what i meant! when i say 'love' i mean positivity/respect/happiness. etc. i just used that word bc#it works for ME which is why i said it. but feel free to replace it with whatever works for you! <2#also sorry if not everything im saying makes total sense i tried my best#this is something ive been thinking about for a while and have been struggling to articulate#i maybe should have read some theory for this abt community building but im too tired + overwhelmed w school reading right now so sorry.#if anyone has additions on that front though please do add them#also ngl im kinda scared to post this. i hope i explained what i mean well enough. like i get wanting to vent and express self hate BUT.#there is nuance to this and it is not unilaterally healthy i think. also i dont see any other online community fostering the normalisation#of selfhate the way the aspec one does! which makes me feel weird abt it especially.#anyway. this is basically my personal philosophy towards aromanticism#mossy posts#⚙️
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Tell me your opinions on the stuff. Any stuff.
Grins. Smiles, even
I'm using you as an excuse to infodump my theory about the Island because I've had no in to do that, and my theory is pure opinion. Anyways:
THE ISLAND IS STUCK IN THE FUCKING FUTURE
(SCARE CHORD)
Hi so you might ask me. What the fuck do you mean by that. Well. Let's start with what we know about the Island, the King, and Wish Craft. (long ass post under cut. sorry)
The Island was redacted from the perception of outside world, via Wish Craft.
Wish Craft has the power to enable Time Craft. We see this primarily through Siffrin's timeloops, but also through the King's powers.
One of the King's powers is to show the saviors a "vision of the future."
...And this same attack is deflected back at the King by Mirabelle in ACT 5, in which the King is able to see the Island before being frozen in time.
...So. The King's "vision of the future." We're never told explicitly what this vision is. All we know is that it's apparently powerful enough to wipe the party in one hit, hearing it from a distance hurts your head, and that whatever Siffrin (and Loop) saw, they don't seem to actually be able to describe it. Even the King himself doesn't know what his vision entails.
We don't know whether the party all sees the same thing when struck by the vision, and Adrienne's answer to the question about it in the Reddit AMA is. vague? It's not a "no," and the specific wording makes me think the answer might be yes. But that's me reading into it.
Now. What do we know about the Island's redaction? The Island was affected by the wish recently, as in "like a decade ago" recently. We know that nobody in Vaugarde or the rest of the world is capable of thinking about the Island, anything closely tied to the Island's culture, or people on the Island for very long. When they do recall these things, they slip right out of reach. Particularly, the consequence for trying to think about the Island (or, more specifically, break the wish that forces the Island out of perception) is significant pain, localized in the head.
And that said pain is enough to become lethal, if pressed hard enough.
From here forward I'm running with the assumption that the King's "vision of the future" is not personalized to any individual, and is unchanging throughout the course of the whole story. Now. Remember the end of ACT 5, where the King gets hit with the deflected "vision of the future", and instead of dying, he recalls the Island and gets frozen in time? Very odd, yeah? Why wouldn't the King just die like everyone else does? He even does take 9999 damage when trying to say its name, like Siffrin does, and like the party does when they're hit by the attack.
Well. We know that he has a "true wish" that the ability to freeze Vaugarde in time grants. I don't think it's at all a stretch to guess that the King's "true wish" is to be able to remember the Island. My personal guess is that the King (and Siffrin) brought this "true wish" into effect via the "SAY ITS NAME" sequence- he even tries three times, a significant number in wishing.
The King (and Siffrin's) wish breaks, because it can't be fulfilled in this moment without breaking the wish to prevent the Island from being thought about. However. Consider the conditions at the end of ACT 5- the King sees the vision of the future reflected back to him, and what he sees is the Island. He remembers the Island, fulfilling his own wish, and is frozen in time. I consider this a compromise between his wish and the one binding the Island- the King gets to remember the Island, but nobody alive is able to think about it, because he's frozen in time; it's like the Universe is correcting itself (I WILL GET BACK TO THIS). The wish of all of Vaugarde to defeat the King is fulfilled, since he is no longer a threat, and Siffrin's wish wraps itself up soon after.
MY POINT BEING. The King's attack is a vision of the future. This "future" is of the Island, in some uncorrupted state. The saviors see it when he attacks them, and he sees it when it is deflected back to him.
The logical next question is "okay, so the Island exists in the future, but how do you know time shenanigans are even related to the Island?"
Recall a very odd series of interactions throughout the game, in which you try to interact with a piece of equipment that you already own.
The game rewinds slightly, before the item disappears, as the Universe corrects itself.
This is awfully similar to two particular events: looping back without seeing the death screen, and talking to the Daydreaming One about her sister. The latter is more interesting to me for the purposes of this theory.
youtube
In both instances, something is misaligned within the Universe (an item existing in two places, someone remembering something they're not supposed to) and it is corrected through some sort of rewind. Also compare the dialogue above to when you try to give Mirabelle the Stylish Bow when you already own it.
The world glitches, but Siffrin defuses the situation before the Universe has to intervene. Omitted from the screenshot is the fact that Mirabelle's portraits switch to happy from "catastrophically anxious" with no transition after Siffrin shows her where the bow is. Important to note is that when Mirabelle tries to recall receiving the bow, her head hurts, much like how trying to break the Island wish causes a headache.
The Universe leads you away from perception, and you can only follow.
My theory that I keep circling around is that through Wish Craft, the Island has been displaced temporally. The denizens of the Island, as well as the Island itself, still exist, but they are in the future. The Island is still loaded into the world, like how equipment is before you try to interact with it, and the Island cannot leave this quantum state, because it never actually went anywhere. The magnitude of the redaction event is so severe with the Island, because it is so much larger as an entity than a sword or a bow. There are of course things I don't really have pieced together, like why somebody would wish the Island into the future, how far into the future it is, or why equipment behaves this way. But it's the only Island theory I've seen that I have some level of confidence in, so I might as well lay out my cards for it.
#asks#this counts as an opinion right? idk#isat meta#isat theory#isat spoilers#isat#sorry i fucking love talking at people but im terrible at coming up with things without a hook so im just saying Any Words#also i cant have opinions without citing my sources.#i'm literally not even the first person to come up with this theory but it has been slowly eating away at my mind for months#and since that one person in isatcord who is smarter than me brought it up i havent really seen this theory in circulation#so i've been wanting to make a post compiling evidence for it for like. fucking forever#sorry to dunk you guys in images hell but like. I need you to See It. See my vision. of the futu- (is shot)#thank you feli as per always your website is so sexy andawesome and cool and it's the best forever.#(SORRY FOR THE YT EMBED BTW. TUMBLR HATES MEEEE)#this is not the most cohesive theory in the world via both my terrible explaining abilities as well as the holes i mentioned#but i think it's an interesting theory and i want to share it. sorry anon
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i lied. put your clothes back on im going to explain the entire south park iceberg to you.
#that’s not very nonchalant of me#im pretty sure i can explain all of these. that is not a good thing#although idk why stanman plush is right at the bottom. hasn’t everyone seen the stanman plush#south park
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slow
#i realized this only a few days ago#and every person ive recounted this story to got the pun right on the spot#explains why my brothers nickname for me is epimetheus#im gonna go lie down#yapping#comics#doodles#animal crossing#acnh#manila.. clam....
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polymer broadcast signal hijack
#pikmin#captain olimar#ft. louie captain shepherd and collin#as well as#moss (pikmin)#watched a stream series of pikmin 4 (its frankenbugs' series) thats what this is about really#but mostly. I just love olimar. I just really enjoy that man#also this really got me flexing those bande dessinée muscles from back thens lol#Ive missed drawin with this kinda proportions... I should do it more#Im gonna draw an olimar to put in my wallet. I need to make my life harder to explain to strangers#I also wanna. add more details to his space suit. make it look more like real life space suit for fun & entertainment#man I enjoy the animals in pikmin so much. they really are just like. animals. theyre animals#its great I love how genuinely bug-lookin the bugs are even with the stylization. pikmin and pokemon are really good at that#would like to learn how to do that... sometimes in the future#oh yeah fun fact. my effort at cleaning up my undercut a few days ago went badly. right before I went to a family reunion thing for 2 days#so I was goin out of my mind at that event postin abt olimar bc I love him#and then. when I got home. I decided to shave my head instead of trying to fix the haircut again#and so the sequence of events becomes I post about olimar -> I enter my bald arc#I am okay with this. have a good night lads. binding books is actually really fun u should try it
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