#im not even mad at her im mad at. the other stuff this post is about
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i feel somewhat responsible for this, even if i’m not the one saying these things. I’m genuinely so sorry.
No need to apologize! It's not one singular person doing it and truth be told I don't think it's a large majority that thinks that (albeit the ones that do are quite vocal). I didn't mean to upset anyone or anything when complaining about it, I was just letting off some steam.
Having a yap session under the cut sorry I feel like rambling under your ask anon.
Admittedly, I do think there are reasonings for people thinking this way. A lot of the focus with Clash has been on the cogs, especially after the 1.3 update. Which I can't say I blame them! Managers were something new and exciting and (from what I can tell) really separated them from the other servers. I don't blame them for wanting to put focus on that because that was their thing. Alongside other things, but majorly when you hear Clash the managers are mentioned in someway shape or form. But as we all know, toons ended up taking the short stick from this. This isn't helped by the gameplay itself, being mainly a fetch-quest deal so you often only talk to npcs once or twice unless if they're repeated ones and the taskline wasn't entirely accessible on the wiki for a while (shoutout to the wiki maintainers. The taskline script is a savior). Which I'm quite excited to see if they deal with this issue with the rewrite. I imagine they will, but anyways. Social media posts would often contain more managers than toons, which I also believe they're starting to fix. And ontop of this, I believe most of the team in the early era of the sever is gone, so there's been some stuff lost in the change. So yeah, dialogue/writing has been kind of rocky. AGAIN- I am completely aware of the rewrite going on and I am not judging them harshly based off of their current state. I'm very appreciative of the fact that they took the time to listen and are focusing on trying to fix it up. And then there's also fandom mischaracterization- especially of the cogs. Forgive me for mentioning mischaracterization because normally I wouldn't really care (I've mischaracterized characters before..especially in my younger years. I think it's just a process of learning an having fun and I hate to limit anyone because of it). With that being said, there's a lot of baby-fying and coddling of the managers. Especially with those who have more 'sympathetic' stories (Misty, Chip, Winston specifically). Don't get me wrong, I like these characters and I can appreciate the story they're trying to tell, but I feel like so many people will hear their dialogue and then misplace their anger. People get mad at Bessie for trying to protect HER lighthouse or at the Elders for trying to keep YOTT safe (lets not forget Winston was there to brainwash toons). Yes, yes technically there would've been better ways to do it but consider this: The toons are scared. Their homes, stores, lives are being taken over by a big corporation that has more resources that they do. They don't have the privilege of waiting, seeing, and gathering. And then people forget that the company has such a huge role in both toons and cogs lives. If you're mad over the mistreatment of Misty or the fact that Winston is still in the dungeon, your anger should be directed at the company who doesn't care. I may be completely wrong in saying this, but I feel like the stories with almost all of the managers is a reflection of the company. The toons are only trying to protect themself and their environments and yet this seems to go forgotten when people start bashing them. And of course, I'd consider myself a toon guy so me saying all this and complaining may come off as "I HATE the cogs and everyone who posts only about them!" and for clarification that's not true. You all know how much I like that little brain thing. The cogs are interesting, their designs are fun, I don't blame people for liking them because I do too. I just wish that the thought process behind so many of these discussions wasn't so cog focused because I believe that this anger at the toons for, RIGHTFULLY, defending themselves helps push this mischaracterization of them as a whole. That they're mean, boring, unlikeable while the opposite is true. Yes there are some, what I'd consider, "filler" dialogue from the shopkeepers. This is just because of the gameplay. But there are some funny and cute moments with them if people would just listen and read.
Which also brings me into another point: people skip the dialogue. I've caught myself doing this before (on my first account. I have 4 accounts total, so I reread the dialogue on like 3 of them). But people will complain about lack of toon personalities while doing this. It's like reading through a comic book, only looking at the drawings, and then complaining because there "isn't a storyline". Luckily, there's been efforts to keep track of the dialogue on the wiki but I doubt a lot of people are going through and reading the entire script. It just feels very disingenuous to criticize the dialogue when you haven't even read it. Likewise, people don't seem to read the blogposts either. This is both from a dialogue aspect and from an update aspect (people continuously asking about hammerspace/mix-and-match under unrelated posts).
#clemask#clemramble#I think I hit some sort of word limit because it wont let me add anymore so im continuing in tags#It kind of feels like people want the toon resistance to be the perfect victim and then get mad when they act accordingly#Fear. Nervousness. Sadness. Helplessness. Anger. etc etc are all valid reactions to their situation#Not every toon needs to be heroic and whimsical. they're scared. their situation is scary if you think about it#they're at the risk of losing their environment and homes.#Obviously the cogs also have their own issues but I always see this brought up when talking about them but the same context#isnt given to the toons when thinking about their characters and communities as a whole#It's kind of weird to me because I feel like even pre-rewrite I know that I can still understand them and justify their actions#and yet people act like clashes (pre rewrite) writing is justifying the cogs when in reality its not#its just showing that cog society (reflection of workplace enviroment) has its own issues. i never saw it as a justification#even with misty. like I never once hated bessie? my opinion of her never changed even after mistys dialogue#bessie did what she had to do because she was scared and wanted to protect herself and others.#id do something similar if a cog (known for taking over towns) suddenly came up to me#PLUS bessie leaves misty alone afterwards. ppl act like she took a shotgun and shot misty dead and it makes me laugh#ANYWAYS SORRY ANON. NO NEED TO APOLOGIZE.#realistically if youre not saying it then i doubt youre contributing#I would say “i wasnt mad” or anything but to be completely transparent with you guys i was Not-Happy when writing that one post#but it's not directed at any single person but rather the idea itself. I'm sure after the rewrite people will chill out#ITS NEVER THIS SERIOUS im beefing over characters named pretty princess sparkles. im aware of how silly this all sounds ok#the clash fandom isnt the only instance of this. ive seen stuff like this in sw before so like. I know this isnt an uncommon thing either#normally id just keep this on a priv or between friends but something kinda snapped yesterday#i think its bc I just KEEP seeing posts like it with those “hot take” posts or whatever and ppl are always so mean about it#i also think some ppl just already dont like toons and look for every. little. thing. to go after them for#like the “youve been drafted line” i refuse to believe people took that line 100% seriously#or maybe this is all wrong and im just a huge toon fan. and in that case i will die on this hill#you will have to pry them out of my cold dead hands before you catch me genuinely bashing them#ok thats clems giant critques and complaints out of the way
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it is beyond infuriating how anne rice seems to insist on marius being a positive force in anyone's life ever. like she can't fully commit to exploring the fact he groomed armand and has repeatedly taken away his consent for what marius thinks is best (take the end of TVA as an example) and just kind of flatly puts it in the narrative. there's not really much interest in how these horrific events make marius come across as the worst because EVERYONE loves him. for gods sake, lestat learns from armand exactly what marius did to him in TVL and then proceeds to go find marius and be super friendly to him in the same fucking book. even armand and pandora, two of the people who have MORE than enough right to hate him, do not. it doesnt feel like shes trying to explore the toxicity of the abusive dynamic he traps them in, it just is there. and like yeah ofc the toxic vampire romance series but i think that this should be handled with more care. and it is not ever really framed in a way that she is interested in exploring how marius should easily be one of the most horrific characters in this series because it kind of feels like sa/rape/grooming/other things of that sort are just put there to further plot and not to really get the respect that they deserve in a medium.
#twist rambles#vc posting#grooming mention#for blocklist sorry im on my im really mad about this fucking series soapbox again#to be fucking honest she treats slavery similar. like its just THERE and the characters doing it dont really feel bad about it (much like m#rius doesnt seem to.. feel much if any remorse for arm.and) and it is just like... ok heres another bad thing with no examination. this isn#a super coherent post but i went a bit forward to see how b&g was handling the arm.and stuff and oh my god. oh im so mad. like i just... i#wish so badly that arma.nds abuse was taken seriously other than haha its sooo quirky that mari.us is in a position of power over him and#provides housing money sex comfort etc for him and is abusing him but hes sooo happy with himmmm. like he fucking sold him into sex slavery#and we are supposed to root for him#ask to tag#sorry this is just. its a very triggering part of the books but its something that i kind of keep returning to to mull over because it is#handled really badly. like i think she was trying to go for a lo.lita vibe (iirc she did actually mention nabok.ov as an inspiration) but#didnt really care enough to examine WHY that is an interesting take on the subject matter. not even to get into pan.doras stuff bc its just#really bad but at least he waited until she was an adult i suppose. like i will give anne one thing that she has characters and (poorly han#led) writing that makes you really think and analyze. which i think is where i enjoy media that is like... this kind of sucks at points but#u can tell the authors viewpoints soo transparently. and u can examine it thru this. like i think thats why i find the gr.ell run of GA int#resting too bc u can telll that man is a libertarian and doesnt respect women. and then claims to do so. its interesting to me. anyways#did u guys know she defended bill clin.ton when the monica stuff came out and victim blamed her. just a funny coincidence.#sorry for the really long tag rant but i am sooo fed up with how she treats this topic forever and ever. bc its been this way forever.#anyways back to reading had to get that out. lmk if u need me to tag this bc its a lot of tws :)
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monachan haul has arrived ✨safely✨
#ft. the gigo collab merch that i had proxied s o b s#‘how many albums did you buy m y g o s h’ j-just these 3…#thanks delivery guys for not notifying me when haul pt 2 was delivered lmao now my mother’s mad at me for not showing her what i got :(#‘just show her man’ d u d e she’ll lecture me about wasting my money— wait nvm i’ll show her my lls gk dvd that came in maybe that’ll help#im gatekeeping monachan from my fam idc if we’re related y’all c a n ’ t have her#b u t on another note the mona album standee looks really cute beside the new sena natsukomi standee#mona looks taller than sena in it but they just. look really cute next to each other aaaaa#though. yk. speaking of the gigo merch and stuff… man. i think i went to that arcade last year lmao#i didnt go up to the floor with the food and stuff since i was only there to play crane games and i was too lazy to climb the stairs#but seeing posts about the collab reminds me of the 1000 yen i spent trying to get ena pjsk nui in the mzen crane machine#i had. like. 4000 yen at the time and around 1/4 of it went to that machine… never forgive never forget#‘why didnt you withdraw more money then’ w e l l the debit card was with my bro and i broke off from the family to explore by myself s o—#and that was how i spent my birthday last year. on the 4th or 5th (cant rem) floor of gigo trying in vain to get enananui#that doesnt have anything to do with monachan but i needed to cry about it somewhere ig lmfao#m a n. what am i even doing with my life lmao#o k that’s enough of being annoying for one night see y’all for daily nagisa in a few hours byeeeeeeee
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watching a youtuber talking abt a horror movie and itis so obvious when somebody has only talked to mental health professionals for like. depression or anxiety* . bc shes sitting here like Woah i dont understand this guys like engaged to a therapist why doesnt he understand that someone being mentally ill doesnt mean theyre an evil scary person... I am sorry to say this but even being a mental health professional doesnt mean you dont think mentally ill ppl r evil and scary and gross
*this is an assumption on my part bc this yter has never talked about having anything other than those afaik Obv its her right not to just in my experience and the experience of other ppl ive spoken to . it seems like if you have pretty much anything other than those and talk to a therapist you would not have this idea that mental health professionals are like. inherently understanding and whathaveyou
#idk if im wording this right. what i mean is i was having a conversation with my most recent therapist and i planned to talk abt some of my#thangs and then she started talking abt how psychopaths r sooooo fucking scary and shes glad none of her parents r psychopaths and i was#like ohhh this is not a safe space suddenly . <- idt i personally am a psychopath but i think its 1. just disgusting to say something like#that ever 2. esp as a mental health professional 3. why r u telling me at all abt yr other patients its . unprofessional to me. but idk.#that combined with some stuff she said abt bpd and etc. rly made me like Oh i can not talk to this woman abt any of my actual serious stuff#and that wasnt the first kind of experience ive had with a person like that like. ive talked to therapists abt my dissociating in the past#and like. ive never felt safe to discuss my hallucinations even when they were rly rly rly bad last year bc i like. some of these therapist#were surprised when i said i struggled with hygiene bc of the depression like. guys cmon ... idk. thisis not a particularly thoughout post#i just thought abt it while watching the video#idk so many youtubers i watch talk up therapy sm and im like Happy it helps them and im happy like. etc. and obv idk what all goes on in#their lives but im kind of sick of ppl talking abt talk therapy like itll fix everything for everyone ever. like im not talking abt just#being like Oh therapy helped me etc but a lot of ppl r like I dont get why ppl dont go to therapy like 1 money 2 like. idk man. the psych#industry is so evil it like. makes me so mad. IDK all of this is halfthoughts im just talking recreationally#oh another disclaimer bc i worry i came off weird by specifying i only mentioned idt im a psychopath bc the sentence b4 that seemed like i#was implying i was. i wasnt trying to be like IM not one of THOSE GUYS i just didnt want anybody to get confused. ok sry
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kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room
#ive only slept 4 hours and its a sunday so im probably just cranky and getting irrationally annoyed idk.#but i wanted to talk abt revenant gun bc im enjoying it and havent gotten to discuss it w anyone :-(#i dont wanna post on here bc i dont wanna see spoilers and i dont have anything to say that other fans would find particularly interesting#ik half the arcs of the veilguard characters despite the fact ill never play it bc i like listening to her + hearing her opinions#but damn i guess she doesnt gaf shes got better things to do. im not being fair i get we jusr socialise differently n thats fine.#and ik its not true but sometimes i feel like she doesnt like being around me very much bc shes always halfway out the door#and she doesnt suggest we watch shit together anymore n has turned me down the last few times ive suggested it#but ik shes doing shit w other ppl shes always calling n playing games n stuff w other friends so well maybe its a little true#and she acts so strange around me sometimes like she'll move to the other side of the room if i go open the fridge or whatever#like damn girl im not gonna fucking bite u. whats up with the constant 5ft distance. bc u dont ever do that with other friends just me.#and then it pisses me off when it sort of comes up as a side thing to smth else bc it ONLY ever comes up around other ppl she'll never#bring it up directly with me and she'll blame it on me as if we havent had this conversation multiple times where ive explained exactly#why im weird abt shit sometimes and where my boundaries are and what i would like and then nothing at all changes#like last time she brought it up around another friend she was like oh well we can hug more if u want like no we fucking cant bc u act#like we're magnetically repulsed u hate me being in ur space and only tolerate it when we're around other ppl which is why it makes ME#uncomfortable when she does try to be physically affectionate or whatever bc she 100% exclusively does it in front of others#like man u dont have to put on a fucking performance??? or even worse do it just bc u feel guilty abt leaving me out i hate being pitied#even if ik i very obviously do get hurt at being left out. but thats my problem man i would never fuck w someone elses boundaries#i hate hate hate when ppl have inconsistent conditional boundaries and never communicate what the fucking conditions are so theyre#constantly moving the benchposts around and acting unpredictably like how am i supposed to know where they are!!!!!! please#snd then so embarrassing to pointedly say its bc of MY behaviour in front of someone else like oh ok. u couldnt have told me this before.#in private so we could actually communicatr. sorry this has gotten so off track im feeling so gross this morning and everything is#frustrating me im so tired i feel nauseous ughhhh#okay well anyway. got my list of tasks lets just focus on this shit instead before i spend yet another sunday miserably ruminating#.vent#im not actually mad at her or anything like i said we just socialise differently we have different incompatible flavours of autism#and thats not her fault but its just so frustrating that we cant seem to communicate very well. i think im allowed to be frustrated#anyway yeah sorry im leaving it im leaving it. i should go polish my boots before i shower
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what if there was smth that u where so so scared to admit or rather something you felt you couldnt describe in an accurate way because youve been made to feel so much like youre being stupid and it isnt that big of a deal and you just could never let yourself not feel guilty for believing it was that big of a deal even when it was and then you found and met one person that you thought you could trust to say that too and then you did and she didnt dissmiss you ans she didnt say you where crazy and it was so so hard to do and then one day she just decided to randomly leave your life with no reason at all and now your general trust issues are worse and you feel like you can never call that situation is or talk truly about it and how you feel about it that much without feeling really guilty or like youre crazy and wrong for feeling that way about it all over again . ahaha
#ANYWAY. anyway .#im not even mad at her im mad at. the other stuff this post is about#but i am also mad at her. great idea to do easily avoidable things that would give someone trust issues after they are the most vunerable#theyve even been in their life to you when they already trust issues. bad idea.#but more mad at the other stuff. whateverrr. not even mad just sad deeply#anyway as those three gay bitches said you think youre a good person becuase you wont punch me in the stomach#and youre not special youre evil you dont get to tell me to calm down#and also you made me feel like an equal but im better than you and you should know that by now#not even most relatable song to my situation just hitting me rn bc im listening to it. whatever#sorry i apologise for being like this i fully know im insane#vent#flappy rambles#sorry this post is so vauge i feel like need to say im not vauging anyone here bc of that i promise im not
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sometimes i feel jealous of cisgender people but then. i dont it’s whatever man. no wait i am. i am very jealous of cisgender people in a fucked up way. what
#i feel like jealous of them because they get to live their life at least feeling right about one thing#they can be perfectly content with their bits and their birth self. and i am so jealous that i probably wont feel that way ever#im like weirdly so envious of people who have such a usually uncomplicated and easy view of gender#this is a totally different thing but im so jealous of people who have almost over involved and cool parents#i’ll see people who like. their parents have an instagram account..and they’ll like…tag each other#and put stupid mother-daughter stuff on their story or idk. be so chill and aware of their kid’s lives#my mom is definitely involved in my life and she does love me but she just like. idk.#there’s probably a lot that goes on those behind closed doors but they’re so like supportive of their Out kids and they like post about it#so something must be going right.#i wish i could just be out to my mom and proudly say hey im your lesbian son now but i can’t because ill be killing her beloved daughter#all i am to her is her Daughter who’s like a best friend to her. and i would feel really bad if i ever kill that idea#in my mind knowing im trans i already know that that girl is dead but its like i haven’t broken the news to the family#they’re so blissfully unaware their daughter is dead and that their son killed her#i dont want to live with that guilt so i’ll have to dispose of the evidence of her body and run far away as a new man#yea theyd accept me if i came out as a lesbian. its like having a daughter but not having to worry about grandchildren#but not if i was physically something else. they wouldn’t kick me out they wouldn’t be outwardly mad.#but they’d always be disappointed that shes gone. they’d always grieve her. they’d always insist she was still here#so thats why like. i can’t. im gonna have to turn eighteen move far away transition to the man i am and never return#let them believe their beloved daughter is missing rather than dead#and these kids. this one specific person actually. can just. be out and be happy and have their parents accept and love them unconditionall#or some never have to come out because they were born right and their parents will love them still and they don’t have to be as#as in danger about their rights right now because of the government#or feeling so Wrong their entire lives or even when they figure out what’s wrong that they cant fix it yet#or having to choose between being repressed and miserable about their real self forever or running away or having to live with eternal guil#while being themself and trying to be happy#they get to feel right about their identity and can comfortably fit in with groups#some cis people anyways#for others theres a lot of other external factors not about gender that makes some people so. kinda like this#like im completely sure there’s plenty people of color who feel this frustration with white people or disabled people about abled people#the frustration that people who were like born or raised or live certain way that they get to have all of these things
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Persona 3 is a really funny fucking interest of mine because it’s something I told myself I’d play eventually after I heard mass destruction for the first time in smash bro and I told myself “if I ever played persona I wouldn’t start with 5 first” so I ended up playing portable only cause it was on consoles and my friend got it despite the shit people complained about-both in how it loses aspect of FES and also the modern ports are sloppy even if the game runs fine-I binge played it for weeks even when I got super sick, it help me overcome my fear of death which had been putting me off from watching something else (casshern) so I finally got to watch it and overall I had a lot of fun with it that my bf gifted me P4 and I’ll probably play the rest of the whole series, maybe dabble into SMT as a whole-
Then reload exists, makes a lot of questionable fucking choices that people are understandably mad about yet I’m somehow not super angry about it and I can’t tell if it’s because I didn’t play FES since most of the issues relate more to that version or just persona still somehow isn’t a big hyperfixation of mine.
#meg text#not gonna tag the fandom cause I don’t want people to actually come complaining into my post even if I can always mute it#but yeah like- even with stuff like no femc im not really mad because her campaign would be a lot to add#and also I like her but I played the boy first since the game literally tells you so I’m more attached to him#still like both of them though#but every other problem with the remake? Doesn’t really retain to my experience so I have no reason to actually be mad about it#even if I don’t think this remake needed to be a thing to begin with I’m not like a dick about it#maybe its cause the plot still retain? So we’d still be talking about the same thing even with the changes they add? Idk#or maybe im too old to care about this kind of discourse cause i dealt with it enough in pokemon (god)#but also I don’t think this is a special interest cause man if this was like “getter arma got remade and they tone it down” id be MAD#cause that’s what the cutscene discourse boils down to and it is stupid they practically censored it#but the version I played didn’t have cutscenes so💀 I have no reason to be really mad even when I see comparisons
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i also thought about. emet showing up in living memory while hilde would be walking around helping people & such, & the one to walk up to them being ere.nville who doesnt really know anything abt him or anything. but emet hasnt changed his appearance yet so its possible ere.nville has seen depictions of him during his time in sharlayan who knows. either way hes a random Living Person in living memory who hilde clearly knows... & its complicated to explain. but i think itd be interesting to have them talk. they have very little in common but emet Knows a lot so i feel like they could talk about animals as much as emet probably winces a bit abt it bc well his experience with creatures in big detail... looks at elpis. looks away. ultimately itd be fun to have him keep the secret that emets alive too. hes not even involved. but it means he & hilde can bond moreeee bc hes putting a big amount of trust in him there
#ffposting#hildemet#sorry you got dragged into this ere.nville. its because i love you#krile has definitely at the very least Seen what solus looks like so prob a bad pick for person who finds out first since shes a scion#& raha um. Well. umm. uh. well. you know.#la.maty'i would also be interesting. but i feel like shed find out way sooner bc emet kinda just Shows up during dt#& theres a lot of bits where youre just running around w her so shed probably know way before#oh yeah hold on#dawntrail spoilers#but also this means this post is gonna end up in the dt spoilers tag. UFGHHH. whatever if you see this there dont worry abt my wolship#but yeah im thinking probably in yok tural honestly... & they wouldnt hide what hes done but i dont think shed take issue too much#based on her reactions to. everything. i think shed take hildes word for it & try to include emet in stuff to try & get to know him#like how she doesnt forgive bak.ool ja ja but shes not like mad at him. & how shes not mad at zor.aal ja anymore either. or sph.ene#& she still tries to reach out to the latter two. & is actively friendly w the former now & wants to get to know him#shes just kind-hearted like that. i know shed want emet to open up. & he might even indulge her bc shes such a ray of sunshine#would remind him of lachesis. & well. hilde does see himself in her but in a 'hes lachesis' way rather than 'hes hilde' way#they both see lachesis' friendliness & faith in others in her. also the silly stuff. shes a lot healthier than him tho thankfully god#so yea i do think emet would like her. its like lachesis got a younger sister for real. oh god#wht if she was a shard of an ancient who was lachesis' younger sibling fuckkkkk. stares at the wall
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so. um. 👉👈
hi guysies.
Ig I should just say like. Hi
I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.
That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.
Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.
But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!
#the butts chronicles#ogh but yea. been rough.#as said I have no idea if we'll keep this house cause man shits been fucked#uhhhh. lets see. recently my sister got into a fairly nasty argument with her husband since they were both drunk and hes a bit of a. hm#quick to being mad guy? I spose? but yea they made up and he actually apologized to me and my family for that so. its okay?#OH YEA FUCK LOL a few weeks ago fuckin tecksas got hit nasty with a hurricane and GUYS. I FREAKED OUT SO BAD LOL#cuz there was hail with the rain but since. I dont think we even ever experienced hail here I was scared that my ceiling roof broke again#and that it was the rain leaking to my room ceiling and was about to burst my ceiling so I legit started hyperventilating and panicking#with like. short and heavy breathing and almost crying badly until I went to look outside and saw hail and only slightly calmed down#oh but yea it was nasty lol. then the next day almost the entire block lost power and apparently sparks were happening cause fallen trees#uhhh. lets see. hmmm. OH OH RIGHT DAMN I FORGOT WE GOT A PUPPY LOL#we've gotten a lil pup all the way back from dec? iirc and she is now older and a shit lol shes in her teething phase and whatnot#still p cute tho and very puppyish. oh yea also during dec our power went out and ogh man dec was so freezing literally.#almost as bad as the one from. uhhh I cant remember the exact year but I remember it being within these past 4 years at least cause I read#a t0h fic during it lol. oh yea speaking of. we also changed our light company and damn. its been not bad so far! we had to pay up to 300#in our old company and now we dont even get to 200 so far! hope Im not jinxing it! hmm oh did I already say before that I had to get a new#phone? cause I did and I did not enjoy it lol. had it for a while and now and its arguably worse cause no damn headphone plug-in#I think I did mention this but in case. I did finish counseling. well more accurately they required payments again since things and whatnot.#I think? I mentioned the stuff I got for my bday and chmisas. I got mostly neat stuff. I guess. one of them has still yet to arrive lol#uhhhh. hrm. I did get Mr. Martinet's autograph as a present! hrmmm#my other sister got another surgery a while back and its been relatively the same since. hmm. my only other living grandparent passed away#me and my ex got into a. not great argument cause mistakes and whatnot. raccoons in the attic thats hopefully taken care of for now#aaaaand the plushes I ordered a damn near year ago have been technically canceled cause of unfortunate circumstances for the creator#who just kinda. posts things now lol ig.#but yea. lots. holy shit guys. lots has happened. fuck man. I think Ive been way more tired than I thought.#not to mention the past weeks of just. reflecting. man#uhhh#long post#LOL i gues#but yerp.
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#a friend of mine got hit by a car yesterday and i only hear about it today when my friend casually brings it up in conversation with someone#else. shes not injured severely or anything just bruised but no one even fucking told me#i asked my friend why she didn't tell me our other friend got in tje fucking accident and shes just like “i dont know i” over and over agai#then this other fucking friend butts in like “its not her responsibility to tell you.” im so fucking angry what the fuck. im so mad#APPARENTLY SHES STILL WALKING AROUND DOING STUFF DESPITE BEING IN A CAR ACCIDENT. SHE GOT INTO IT LAST MORNING AND SHE WAS STILL JUST GOING#PLACES THAT DAY. IM APPARENTLY THE ONLY FUCKING PERSON THAT DIDNT KNOW. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK#yeha we dont talk much anymore but hello what. whaht.#og post#vent
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have i ever related to any other characters ... who remembered
#NOTTTTTTR THOSE ONES NOT THOSE ONES NOT THOSE ONES if you remember those ones forget abt it. my kinnie era incredibly incredibly incredibly#dark times we cant go back. which limits me bc i like havent . how to phrase. much of my media interests r polluted bc of all of that so#like. ages 13-18 are coated in horrible smog mostly... which is awkward bc 13-18 r the ages i was like. Most interested in media. but all of#those have the smog on them. outer wilds got out safe thankfully bc that one was all mine but the other ones... very scary stuff#ik to some it may be crazy to not include The character im names after on this poll but 1. I cannot put that bitch on this poll next to my#women. my women dont deserve that 2. Yes i suppose i am named after him but im not even the me who named us after him I am just connor. its#inherited. 3. I DONT LIKE HIM I DONT LIKE THE SHIT HES FROM HE HAS THE GOO ON HIM AND ALSO WHAT!!!! HOW DID I EVER LIKE THAT FUCKASS MUSICAL#ok well that basically reveals who it was idr the last time i talked abt it so new mutuals may not have been aware. yeah -_-#i dont rly relate to him much at all anymore aside from like. Yk. i have been suicidal as long as i can remember NDBFJFNFJ and i have like.#anger issues. but hes just not a very me character despite being my namesake. and idt he ever truly was i think i just kinned him bc of that#fuckkkass polycule. but i suppose i could say that abt any character i kinned it was all kindating bullshit. wtvr. i cant think abt it or#ill get rly mad so were moving on DNDBFJFBRJBF im glad im not a kinnie anymore (no hate to my kinnie mutuals iii judt had a horrible#experience with it and it was Not at all healthy for me . bc of my brain)#anyways i say all this to say ive whittled it to solanum and helena im too embarassed to include characters from my triple a game and i feel#its illegal to include my ocs. but i cant just post a poll between 2 characters thats crazy#also helena isnt much like me aside from me just also being mentally ill. and projecting onto her
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Tsuma is an INSANE one to start on but also a fantastic one... I think my first was SP so it's so funny we've "traded" those specific shows lmao BUT YEAH. YEAH. I BELIEVE YOU. I'M GONNA BE NORMAL ABOUT KEISUKE BUT NOT ANYTIME SOON. Tsutsumi's Princess Peach lips every time Maida squishes his face 😭😭😭😭😭
The moment outside the school basically condenses everything about the show for me it's so perfect and cute but I'm INTERNALLY SCREAMING AT ALL OF THIS BEING SAID OUT LOUD... PLEASE... YOU'RE GOING TO END UP ANOTHER IMPRISONED TSUTSUMI... He really is SUCH a malewife though that's what destroyed me frame one... especially because he's really similar to how Tsutsumi talks about himself so like perfect casting I hope he had fun with the role... Definitely continuing when I can are you kiddinggggg
Well Hopefully You Still Think AtR's Cute And/Or Sweet Wherever You're At Now So The Rest Of This Isn't Embarrassing LGSKFJLGJ BUT YEAH... YEAH... I'm aro myself so all that's Complicated right, and definitely something I tried to consider when Sorta-Not-Really-Recommending, but it's good to hear it can be entertaining even without being able to relate :']
THAT COULD'VE GONE /WAY/ SOUTH AT THE PANEL but I'm glad everyone made it out unharmed😭😭😭BUT YEAH... at the end of the Ohashi arc when Ogata threw all his stuff off the desk and the gang just wordlessly put it back for him 'cause that's all they can do... ough. Momence. That's why it was so sick watching everything fall into place [temporarily]. Also appreciate the Jo-ism in doing all the dirty work for a politician in the family and wanting to be stopped without saying it upfront and uhhhhh being fine with dying and/or going to prison LMAO
OH BUT NO PROB it is always tradition for me to send the translated letter once I've indoctrinated someone new :] funny thing is every single version I've sent is different because I've been editing it to this day
AGAIN i chose tsuma cause the title was Utterly Insane and i just had to see for myself what the fuck was going on and im so glad i did... funny that we did trade first-watches (and fun that i get 'my own version' of ogata's letter lmao) :)
BUT YEAHYEAH keisuke's adorable.. like genuinely i think he's tsutsumi's cutest role ive seen so far its hard for me to imagine one topping it in regards to how endearing he is (❁´◡`❁) keisuke being so enamored by his wife but being So Blind To How Things Look is genuinely super funny. like poor guy really is just super happy to have his wife back in a way but not yk (╯▽╰;;; )
Horribly i think of okita from that Taboo movie when it comes to consuming media: even if i dont personally have that experience or understand 100%, i can still appreciate a good story and characters (im paraphrasing SO hard and with less homophobia </3), so if you got anythin good throw it my way anytime ♪(´▽`) !! i'm about to start episode eight in a bit but NO WORRIES i still very much am a fan of the show !! and im sad/excited to see im almost done with it ( sad its almost over, but also SUPER interested to see how everything comes together in the end (☆▽☆) )
#long post#snap chats#tsutsumi drinking game where you have to guess his chara either ends up dead in jail or Somehow Ok ☠️☠️#keisuke's such a dork... he's literally such a puppy of a man right down to being Stupid Loyal it warms my heart (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)#i LOVEE it when takae squishes his face cause I Repeat... he does look super cute and silly...#that's literally all i can say about him He's Cute And Silly and it's why he's one of my fave tsutsumi roles#the best things in life are cute and silly.... its why i love kirby...#now i wonder about how tsutsumi talks about himself if keisuke reminds you of him... inch resting... but i believe its a perfect casting..#BUT ANYWAY YEAH NO the one thing i like about psychology is that it helps me understand people more#or at least im more willing to investigate why X and Y is a thing for Z yk#so Again even if i havent personally experienced something or get it from a Personal perspective i can still work out how other people feel#and just immerse myself and still enjoy the media :)#AH BUT YEAH THE BIT WHERE OGATA THROWS ALL HIS STUFF ON THE GROUND lit the peak ABSOLUTE Top Ten momence#cause Yeah No we're ALL frustrated for him at this point with how much he keeps getting shot down for actually trying to do his job#but not do his job TOO well no cause God Forbid THAT happens i guess. again makes it hard to be mad at him for being out of pocket lmao#IN ANY CASE im gonna go do somethin quick then im gon finish AtR either within the next two hours or at least this morning BYE#birthday went fine nothing too remarkable happened other than my sis and her boyfriend made pizza and it was real good#then they my bro and i all played smash bros and i was trying my best Not to play too seriously cause ik my sis and her bf dont game much#but my bro and i do and i at least wanted to give em a chance to have fun ☠️ alright ima go take care of That Thing BYE
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𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 𝐇𝐄...
☆彡SUMMARY.; Things I believe he would do in a relationship that you’d (us.. all of us..😭) would find attractive
☆彡FEATURED.; ARMANDO ARETAS x READER
☆彡TROPE.; Established Relationship
☆彡FORMAT.; HEADCANON
☆彡GENRE.; FLUFF + SUGGESTION + A TINY BIT OF ANGST
☆彡WARNINGS.; mature language, mature actions, a lil bit of Armando’s toxicity shining thru, brief mentions of choking (not in like he’s gonna kill u type of way😭) brief mentions of violence, a little bit of spoilers ahead.
☆彡NOTES.; heyyyy thank u guys SAURRRR much for the love on the last Armando work I posted, I’m glad so many of yall liked it and I will continue to post and write about him 🫶🏽. (And yeah I took that picture on the middle so be free to save.. cause whew lord..). I hope you guys enjoy this one😛💕.
REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED🫶🏽.
[IN PUBLIC]
✬ Armando would keep an eye on you, especially since he’s not a very trusting person to most
✬ He’s like very aware of the space you’re both in so he’d keep you at least within arms reach of him if it’s just a regular kind of day
✬ And he’d also do that thing where if he wants you to move, he’ll grab your waist and either shift you to where he wants you to do, or he’ll do that just to pass behind you
✬ And he a quiet person so instead of using many words, he just stares and expects you to know what he’s thinking
✬ If a situation arises where you’re doing something that he thinks you shouldn’t be doing, he’ll simply clear his throat and stare and he knows you should know what he’s thinking
✬ also this man has no filter whatsoever, so if you’re talking, it doesn’t even have to be to him, you could be taking to his dad or something and he’ll just blurt out some of the most insane stuff in either Spanish or English
✬ (like he did to that girl when he called her fine)
✬ like if you say “im so hot” on a day when it’s scorching outside he’d def say stuff like “I definitely agree” or some shit like that just to embarrass you
✬ He’d also stare at your lips while you’re talking to him, especially if you’re mad at him
✬ and openly stare at your body too
[ON CASES || MISSIONS]
✬ you don’t even have to be in a relationship for this one but just watching him fight
✬ Each movement of his is so effortless and he just looks good each and every time
✬ He’d also probably see you staring and raise an eyebrow at you and tell you to pay attention
✬ would tease you on missions definitely
✬ especially if it’s a mission together
✬ only a bit tho cause he’s very focused on missions
✬ makes you be his backpack on his motorcycle
✬ he’d adjust your hand to where he wants it when riding the motorcycle
✬ drives it with one hand and occasionally taps at your leg with the other
✬ and if he has time, he’ll teach you to fight like he does
[IN PRIVATE]
✬ in private he’s definitely an attitude fixer
✬ if you do something to piss him off he’ll probably just stop talking all together until you apologize
✬ when that happens tho he furrows and raises his eyebrows a lot while clenching his jaw as a way to not get too annoyed with you
✬ curses in Spanish a lottttt
✬ and when you’re being bratty or rude to him, he’ll literally grab you by the neck and bring you real close to his face then say in your ear “arregla tu actitud antes de que yo la arregle por ti..” (fix your attitude before i fix it for you..)
✬ ofc he’d do that in public too
✬ I feel like he’d be a bit clingy when alone because he doesn’t like pda, so he waits until it’s private and will literally grab all over you
✬ he cooks shirtless (idc it’s true and yes he can cook🤚🏽)
✬ has told you the most mundane every day things in the sexiest voice ever
✬whistles when you walk in a room
✬ and slaps your butt regularly (sue me ik he does🤚🏽)
✬if you’re sleeping in the same bed there’s only two places he’ll sleep, on your butt or on your stomach (no in between 🤷🏽♀️)
✬ uses that same condescending voice on you to tell you what to do, when you’re wrong, or to stop acting up
eugh I love him sm🥹
#🪸 :: 𝗟𝗜𝗧𝗧𝗟𝗘 𝗡𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗦#armando aretas#armando armas#jacob scipio#bad boys ride or die#bad boys for life#armando x reader#armando aretas x reader#armando armas x reader
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THE LONG AWAITED UPDATE (bc i fell off for two weeks oops)
- Hephaestus was literal hell. i was fighting for my life
- My unhinged laughing because I thought of a horrible joke about the boss fight that I couldn't tell her
- Me: *At a Gatherer's Garden* What should we get?
Her: What plasmids does Ryan use?"
Me: Uhhhhhh,, You'll see-
- Andrew Ryan is an incel
- She made so many Oppenheimer jokes about the bomb
- Atlas: *rushing us to set off the bomb and get to Ryan*
Me: ANYTHING FOR YOU BEYONCE
- I dropped backwards into the WYK room super dramatically, taking my sweet time picking up supplies. Then I slowly turned around laughing maniacally ONLY FOR HER TO NOT GET IT
- She didn't understand what the WYK room was implying until Ryan's speech, and she just sighed and said "I knew it. Fucking Atlas"
- She was dead silent during Ryan's death until the final "OBEY" and she busted out laughing
- I was also dead silent until running away with the little sisters
- I really hit her with the "So how do we feeeeelllll?"
- HATES Fontaine, she spent like a good minute roasting his accent
- Mama Tebenbaum supremacy 💪💪
- She made fun of the sisters scampering on all fours
- (Fontaine showing off his plasmids)
Her: THIS IS YOUR MAN⁉️
Me: 😬😬 yEahhh,,,,
- The first time i've ever noticed Suchong's corpse?? And listened to his final diary??? He deserved it for smacking the sister honestly
- MERCURY SUITES AND APOLLO SQUARE ARE PURGATORY
- I set the bear in Fontaine's apartment on fire, as is tradition
- I spent 5 minutes trying to find the last little sister because I always forget about the poor house
- Me running around trying to find the Big Daddy boots and getting swarmed by splicers
- Her: Man, fuck Fontaine
Me: Yes ma'am 🫡🏃♀️
Her: N O-
- "OoOoO mE pOoR mOiRa"
- Me casually reloading like 3 times because the little sister died in the proving grounds
- ME CASUALLY LOSING MY MIND BECAUSE I KEEP TRIPPING OVER THE LITTLE SISTER IN THE PROVING GROUNDS
- Me: Yeah we might have to finish this next ti- WAIT WE'RE AT THE END????
- The last half always hits me like a truck idk why
- (Fontaine reveal)
Me: *critikal voice* HE'S PULLING HIS COCK OUT-
- (Little sisters massacring Fontaine)
Her: OH THEY'RE GOIN IN-
- Both of us crying during the good ending :(
- I also showed her the other endings and she agreed they're absolutely wild
Since my friend and I are playing Bioshock 1, i wanted to share some of the things that have happened so far:
- We sat and watched the plane fully sink
- "OUGH?!" < her reaction to the giant Ryan statue
- Right off the bat she didn't trust Atlas and said his wife and child aren't real
- Every security bot is named Jeff
- The wrench is also Jeff(rey Bezos)
- We spent 30 minutes trying to get to Steinman because I forgot I has to throw the bombs at the debris blocking the entrance
- We went through 4 nitro splicers before I realized something wasn't right. I do this everytime. I literally replayed Bioshock like 2 weeks ago and forgot how to do that
- I've died more times in this playthrough than I ever have in Bioshock 1
- Keeps asking me if Atlas is evil, I keep telling her no and that he's my babygirl
- I've been spoon feeding her Atlas propaganda so hopefully she'll trust him by the end
- LOVES the little sisters, terrified of big daddys. She screamed the first time we had to fight one
- I tried to get the first bouncer stuck behind the register in the Medical Bay, but absolutely shredded him before I could
- The women were too stunned to speak
- We sat under the floor of the McCracken Crab trying to kill a Rosie. I died.
- I also hid under the floor of the Fisheries and smacked Splicers that walked overhead
- I got killed by a (different) Rosie like 5 times before I finally killed her
- Also ran from the third Rosie repeatedly before I finally killed him
- She chose target dummy for our first real plasmid
- I've only ever used it when losing control of the plasmids. So I've only used it once-
- Me: God I hate Andrew Ryan
Her: Bash his brains in
Me: *Hephaestus flashbacks* Oh I'm gonna
- Spider splicer: *angry screeching*
Me: New wife for you
Her: Great, thanks
- Hates it everytime I say "Snappies"
- I spent way too long looking for the final spider splicer before realizing I could take a picture of a dead one
- She did trust Peach Wilkins though (Somehow??)
- "I've got a really bad feeling about this" intensifies
- Yelled "THIS IS YOUR MAN⁉️" When Atlas walked out and almost missed Ryan's speech and the splicers bc of it
- Predicted the sub would blow up, but was shocked when it actually did
- I think she begrudgingly trusts Atlas now, his acting is peak
- I also went on a 2 minute rant about him and she made fun or me the entire time
- *finds a crawlspace full of Atlas posters*
Me: Oh my god, this is where I live!!
Her: NO
Me: With my Atlas posters and my.. Pistol bullets??
Her: N O !!
- #1 Langford stan (she's in love with her)
- Got jumpscared by the Houdini splicer that appears behind you (We both screamed)
- I was laughing bc his shadow was looming over us, then slowly turned around and we had a staring contest before I finally shot him in the face
- I've literally never seen him just sit there before?? He always disappeared as soon as I turned around. Wild
- She compared Langford writing the code on the window to 11307 from Danganronpa (iykyk)
- Cue disappointed sighing (Not really, I laughed really hard)
- This entire playthrough has just been me aggressively hitting on Atlas and her reevaluating our friendship
- Not even the posters are safe
- "Who is Atlas?"
Me: My husband
Her: UGH
- Saying "This is for me!!" every time I see an Atlas poster
- She is genuinely considering killing me
- Made me harvest a little sister to see what would happen 😔 We reloaded tho it's okay
- I've found so many secrets in this playthrough, including a vent that goes to a meat locker in the Farmers Market
- It felt like I was getting chased by everyone in Rapture while trying to make the Lazarus Vector
- I also (somehow) shot the big daddy in Langford's office while fighting splicers
- That was terrifying
- *Enters Fort Frolic* Me: It's about to get real silly
- I've been hyping up Cohen this entire time because I knew she would like him
- Unfortunately, she does
- She gagged at the "expectant mama" line
- Got jumpscared AGAIN by the splicer in the basement of Sinclair Spirits
- "SINCLAIR WHAT THE FUCK"
- I can never find the record store when I play Bioshock, this time was no different
- I gave up and went after Hector instead
- When we met Silas Cobb she yelled "KITTENS??"
- She agrees Silas is a discord mod
- We spent like 2 minutes straight trying to catch Hector and Silas
- I also got jumped by a bunch of splicers every time I tried to kill a bouncer
- She lost it at Cohen walking down the stairs
- "HIS GAY ASS WALK"
- I smacked Cohen after his speech and immediately ran
That's all so far, but we'll hopefully play some more this week!
#reblog#atlantis.txt#SORRY IF THIS ONE IS BORING I CANT REALLY REMEMBER EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED#i'll make another post with stuff i forgot#AND our bioshock 2 stuff so far#i knows there more that i forgot but agh#spoiler: she loves sinclair. immediately trusted hin#im sitting over here salty in the corner but i cant even be mad bc me tok#too*#andrew ryan#frank fontaine#atlas#brigid tenenbaum#seriously tho the other two endings are so????#i need to make a fake name for my bestie or smthn bc 'her' isnt really working#long post
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this is my element (+ album)
asking me to pick my fave album is like asking an orphan matron to pick her favorite baby boy
thats some weird and cruel circumstances to put upon me i feel like it changes every damn week like a rota
i mean what if my beats misbehave and i gotta put 'em in time out i cant play permanent on that theyre too cute
but yknow what i can show you one thing thats been on my mind lately
===
so when i was a kid we had this skateboard vid by "element skateboards" on DVD
they were this skateboard kit slash apparel company that was all about progressivism and shit and they did these much lauded comp tapes of dudes riding around on their boards and doing the dopest of macho tricks on the shit
flipping it turnways
putting the rock in the house like a big man
we had some of their merch actually
===
so anyways the one we had back then was This Is My Element
released 2007
mostly clips from cali i think and i mean the camerawork is fucking insane on some of those shots
this is gonna sound lame as fuck but i prob spent so many cumulative hours just peelin through the footage and ogling the shit outta it
that framing was tight
===
so you may be asking yourself or me
dave you genuine dicksucker i asked about your fav album not your favorite sordid ass display of smooth dudes hardcore riding and grinding them boards in public dude you have a problem
ok well that wasnt a question first of all so jot that down
but anyways to THAT i say
listen to the music
the whole thing has an original soundtrack of ambient beats
got some abstract hip hop jams, got some more indie stuff, lots of acoustic sampling
HELLA underground
and basically every track minus one is done by sampler beast david p. madson AKA "odd nosdam"
dude is my hero seriously
he is the master of the beat machine i shit you not hes always been kinda my idol on this stuff
aside from bro obviously
===
obviously.
===
anyways he had an E-mu SP-1200 which is a really oldschool sampler invented by dave rossum in the late 80s
revolutionary to the hip hop scene
nosdam had this mega distinct sound to his music that i always wanted to replicate on my own beats
still do
i dont know for sure if he used it on T.I.M.E. but he uses some of the same samples from "vol. 9" which was exclusively SP-1200 so im gonna get a lil j���accuzi on that
it couldve been a boss dr sampler SP-202 though idk
he had one of those
===
so aside from beating the shit out of the pause/resume button to flip my whole cranium at the cinematography or whatever i would also kinda play it on loop to listen to the soundtrack and space out at 2am
the lonely broner seemed to free his mind at night
ok shit broner is good but i didnt mean it like that
that was goofy lets just keep movin
it was the only way i had to listen to it back then but i mean the video is 50 mins long so its basically just an odd nosdam album with accompanying ambient skater sounds and random expletives and whatever
random car sequence
yknow what i dont think people respect enough?
the dude who catches all the "mad stunts yo" on camera
i swear to god at least half the time hes ALSO on a board and that shit is bananas to me
bros gotta be on some whole other level of zen to skate good AND catch all them glamor shots of his fellow skater
thats like an express ticket to the ER imo
the ambulance is already on the scene watching you like an eager crow watches a half dead dog
===
ok gonna go ahead and lay it out flat
not great on a board myself
kinda dogshit at it actually
so maybe im not exactly an arbitrator of skateboard heinousness
but i always kinda liked watching THEM do it i mean who doesnt?
whats an even crazier layer to stack on the "dave" cake is
and dirk told me this because unfortunately it kinda happened post-2009
he would do all these collabs with one of my childhood favorite underground rappers david cohn aka serengeti
surrounded by daves left and right dude even before all the time travel horseshit
thats like
serendipitous as fuck i think!
===
if sburb was just a revolving door of artists called dave that i could bump fists with
instead of other mes in various states of aliveness tending toward extremely dead
i wouldve probably given it something higher than 2 stars on my TGN review
===
so yeah you ask me my favorite album its T.I.M.E. by odd nosdam i guess
bump that shit on a walk your mind will go places unknown to man
#dave strider#homestuck#comix#this is my element#the way i drew dave posing here is rly heavily inspired by askinsufferableprick btw#welcome to strider infodump hours
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