#im legit tearing up lol
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bad is leaving</3 they're all hugging</3
#DUDE IM GETTING SADDD#IT WAS SO NICEEE#:')#arkanis#theyre all crying ksjkjsjsjs#THE MUSIC DENIX PUT OH YOU LITTLE SHITKGJG#im legit tearing up lol#anyways oughh#gn
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woe another tag vent session be upon ye
#one of the girls in my class looks just like her. oh my god.#like im not being dramatic i literally thought it was her in my peripheral vision.#literally almost burst into tears in the middle of the room lmaooooooo#and then for the rest of the day every time i saw someone with her hair color i just saw her.#this shit sucks fr y'all i have never almost cried in public this much#and then i had to drive to pick up some groceries and fuck.#ive never been an anxious driver. i quite enjoy driving actually.#but i literally almost had a panic attack when i first pulled onto the road. i was so fucking anxious the entire time i was behind the whee#someone came up behind me pretty fast and i legit had to pull over to calm down it was so bad#so uh. not gonna be driving for a while lol. gonna kill myself or someone else doing that.#idk. idk i think this has me pretty messed up and i probably will be for a while. idk#my roommates and i finally decorated our living room and it was . fun. we laughed and made jokes and it was fun#but well. predictably i am feeling guilty over having fun now. which sucks ass from every angle#should i probably maybe make an appointment for therapy ???? probably ???????????#idk. might be good to talk all this out out loud yk. but also i Know i will cry and i dont want to do that.#sigh. anyway.#also predictably i cannot sleep. couldnt last night either.#i might go paint in the living room. i dont know.#anyway if u read this whole rant ily ur earning the veteran's pass to Winter's Breakdown Sessions#winter speaks#personal#grief tag#<- once again if u need to blacklist. will not hold it against anybody i prommy#tw death#tw panic attack
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“maybe i was meant to be alone...”
cutely combines two of my hcs: he’s got blue blood [b/c it looks cool], and he’s very unlucky when it comes to relationships
#my art lol#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#fukase#fukase vocaloid#vocaloid fukase#blood tw#gore tw#blue#blue blood#red#tears#heartbreak#IM GETTING TO THE ASKS SORRY lemme just post this before the day's over 😭#last fukase friday of the year...#man i can never draw this mfer consistently 😔 something's always fckin different when i draw him#either i forget some detail or its the hair. HIS HAIR. ITS NOT EVEN THAT COMPLICATED OF A HAIRSTYLE BUT IT SCREWS ME UP SO HARD#I DONT KNOW WHY I SUCK AT DRAWING HIS HAIR SM 😭😭😭 it legit looks different every fcking time i draw this bastard.#if you compiled all my art of him im positive he'd look wildly different in each fcking one. UGHH. why is consistency so hard
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⚠️ Spoilers for Artem Wing's sweet chapter
#artem wing#zuo ran#tears of themis#artem sweet chapter#tot artem#l'hôtel.tearsofthemis#themis.artem#my post 📫#aerin.jpg#...... ngl i didn't really enjoy this one much. sweet chapters have been very npc fetch questy.. 🙃#but the handful of moments at the beginning and end were cute ig#haven't gotten around to reading the most recent card/s yet.. now im just praying lol#anniv and au cards seem to be my best bets / lean more to my favor.#legit the au ones have so much plot the last set they had for the egyptian au had me on the edge of my seat every damn time#..... so clearly im saving tf up for gufeng now bc hell yeah gimme dat good shiet#have almost 200 saved up i think (yes ofc ive spent some here and there bc the package deals they do during lim banners are discounted af)#wishing us all the best of luck 😭🙏🏻
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finally got to see this panel spread <3 oh if only it didnt come in the midst of great psychological pain
#speculation nation#fanny reads trigun#probably for the best im done seeing the little twins bc if i saw more i might just cry#legit in the middle of when vash stabbed rem i was so close to tearing up#and then the stuff afterwards... ooof#and now we r back to wolfwood trying hard to get vash to stop being so DEPRESSED#trying to annoy him out of it. not very effective. but A+ for effort i guess lol#trigun spoilers/
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twinkie candy canes slap. like legit
#i wasnt really a fan of real twinkies#well maybe if i was high lol#but yeah bouta TEAR THIS SHIT UP#also ive been trying a bunch of new fruits lately#lychee bayberry hawthorn and jujube are fucking BOMB#like wow#whoever cultivated those deserves a thousand pats on the back#also im broke#like my card was froze#haha#and also i cant call them back because no one was in the office#my hair is on fleek too#popping severely#curls like you wouldnt believe#i switched to a bar shampoo instead of liquid...#cannot recommend enough legit#it is wonderful#will NEVER go back unless its the only option
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watching the new horizons episodes and thank fucking god they made kleavor cool. im still traumatized from journeys fucking up all the gen 8 rep
#also ok we’re getting entei soon. alright. cool. awesome. very small wait compared to kleavor i see. :/#im not actually mad dndjdjdjndndf its nbd#also eve and i had decided that this kleavor was pokeani au!shuca for funsies#which is like jokey halfway canon bc au characters are canon in starfall#and then that kleavor got beat up and tied up???? um. damn wasnt expecting like legit parallels we were just being silly LOL#(is that bop spoilers….. im still rewriting some shit)#i mean ive alluded to it i think in another ask and it wont be revealed for a bit and i havent given context so. lol#it even has a tear in its wing and several scars wtf#also i like how we saw its backstory#ALSO ALSO oh boy diana’s back. time for more gilf hunter friede shenanigans#echoed voice
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best day ever yesterday followed by today ! by today .
#i have cried twice lmfao lol#worked a store on my own and did my first closing shift !#i've never closed ANY of our stores before and literally don't know how todo it lol#ahahaha and then i watched my bus watch me run up to it and then have it drive away#and i am now stood at the bus stop in tears lmaooooooo#loving today#my period started last night !#my boost was so shit it had the little hairs in it#im literally backsliding so hard on the suicide stuff right now oh my god#legit hasn't been this bad in a very long time lol lol lol lol lol#my sushi for lunch was pretty good though tht was nice#cel speaks
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Okay this is unlike me to recommend songs here but before I go to sleep, here's a song for you guys.
This song comforts me a lot so I hope that this song can comfort someone who needs it too! Good night lovely people, I hope that an amazing and awesome day will be ahead of you <3
#if i need to describe this song it will be 'hauntingly beautiful'#because i legit was left gaping when i first heard it before the emotions hit me and i was tearing up#especially when i watch the nell's room 2022 live version on youtube with the ocean background hhhh#i just wish that more people will listen to this masterpiece and hopefully it can comfort them like it did for me#love you guys 🫶🏻#im done being annoying ill log off now lol#personal.txt#Spotify
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,,,
#really thought i was gonna end up in the er this morning#kittens woke me up around 5am and i felt fine but after a bit i went to shift onto my other side and#suddenly there was such intense pain in my sternum i could hardly move it felt like there was a crack down the center#and someone was trying to pry open my ribcage#my chest felt super tight and i couldnt breathe deep#was hoping it would just pass but an hour later i had to get up to top up the cats dry food and#my god it was torture i thought i was gonna pass out just trying to bend or crouch#legit had to drop the kibble from like a foot above the bowl cause i just couldnt get any lower#barely made it back to my bed#then out of nowhere my teeth started chattering so bad it wasnt even that cold in my room#had to clench my jaw hard just to stop#literally started googling symptoms and#i was in tears and a panic thinking i was having a minor heart attack#was trying to decide if it was worth calling my mom to ask her to take me to the hospital#decided against it#still not sure if i made the right call#managed to fall asleep for a couple more hours and its not as bad but my chest still doesnt feel right#like ive had minor chest pain many times in the past just due to stress and anxiety#but never somwthing like this#im so scared lol#guess we'll see what happens????#and of course tomorrow i have a super important appt an hour away so i hope i feel better by then#anyways i doubt anyone read this#thats fine it was mostly just for me to get it out and had nowhere else to#i will tell my therapist about it all on thurs.... if i make it that far :)#personal#tdl
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Ultraviolence
pairing: raider!joel miller x fem!afab!reader
summary: thank god—a handsome stranger saves you from the grips of a pack of cruel, cruel men. unfortunately, said stranger, joel miller, is cut from the exact same cloth as the rest of them.
warnings: oh. boy. rough sex/smut (fem penetration, fingering, cum play if you squint) so 18+ only content; fem!afab!reader; raider!joel; canon typical violence; mentions of hair pulling/reader having long hair; light dacryphilia; age gap; pet names (baby, darlin’, sweetheart, girl); slapping, spanking, choking; !!!NONCON!!! (sexual violence/assault, coercion, allusions to more sexual abuse—Dead Dove, Do Not Eat y’all, protect yourselves).
word count: 4k+
no use of y/n in this fic
alright y’all!!! here is the non-con raider!joel fic!! stay tuned for the version coming out soon wherein Joel actually rescues the reader LOL join the taglist to be notified when I post it!!! y’all’s requests will quite legit be the death of me BUT this was fun to write so im not mad. this version is just purely depraved & Joel ‘Big Dick’ Miller is a mean mean man. wrote it pretty fast too so b nice 2 me.
love u all, sorry for searing your eyeballs:)
-em<3
—
The stucco prickles and tears at the flushed skin of your cheek, a reminder that it’ll be winter soon. The birds are sure of it, and most of them managed to get away before the frost stood a chance of nipping them.
You didn’t.
After a few years of non-stop struggle, losing everything but your own life, you figured there were worse ways to go. At least you would be… well—you, in the end.
In whatever shape this man and his leering group of accomplices left you in.
“Against the wall,” and his voice had been the crack of a whip, snapping by your ear as electricity shot up and down your spine, as the tingling realization that the chase was over—the jig, up—settled into your bones. “Spread your fuckin’ legs.”
There were more hounds around… waiting.
Always waiting.
They’d already gotten to your old, tattered clothes. The brisk air bites at your exposed skin, but at least the cold would account for the violent shivers wracking your limbs. Even as the beast pins you to the side of the decrepit house, forces himself between your knees, your primary preoccupation is to stifle your fear.
They’d get everything else on display—but they would never get to see that.
When the screaming starts, those confused grunts, huffs, and squelches of a blade carving into flesh, you mostly commend your own imagination:
“I did it. I’m in my happy place. This will be quick, then.”
But then a rough, unfamiliar hand grabs hold of your naked waist, flipping you around, slamming your spine against the frosty stucco.
This is real.
And you bear witness to his carnage.
He painted the side of the house into a mosaic of inter-mingling blood, splattered like a Pollock against the grass, the wrinkled clothes and the rugged face of your salvation.
His eyes rake over your still-trembling body before he wrenches a red-coated knife—never breaking eye-contact—from the throat of the man you’d been at the mercy of just a few seconds ago.
Blood gushes up from the fatal wound, and you both watch the cruel scene, mesmerized. The attacker’s eyes dull, all evil dissipating from that once-ferocious gaze. The rescuer’s big, wide hands flip him over, stripping him of his stained beige jacket. Then, he carelessly kicks the lifeless form face-down onto the yellowing grass.
“Put it on.”
You uncross your arms, snatching the coat from the stranger’s extended hands. It doesn’t bother you, its belonging to him.
He’s dead; you get his coat.
A fair exchange.
He keeps an eye on you as he sorts through the pickings: a few strips of dried meat here, a loaded gun there (two bullets in the clip—you watch as he checks), and a few good blades, stashed inside pockets, bags, and down shirt-fronts.
The man straightens up.
Tall.
“Get in front of me,” his low baritone strikes you, causing your knees to concede to a slight wobble. “You run, you die. Got it?”
Texan.
Slowly, you nod, and a firm grip circles your wrist, tearing you from the wall.
“Walk.”
Your heart hammers—near deafening in your ears—as the stranger stalks behind you, directing your trembling movements with brusque, snapped commands.
Finally, the scattered orangey-red leaves begin to multiply, the domestic remnants of a past civilization thinning. The neighborhood opens into a field; large oaks and slouching willows shiver under the weak glare of the afternoon sun.
There’s a house up there. It seems to be in alright shape (some things are built tougher than others) and it’s certainly a step up from a few of the more… unsavory places the outbreak had led you to.
Nearing it, you take not of how much it resembles a barn-house. Red, pentagonal roof, and a big, wide, brown front door.
Gingerly stepping a foot on the cracked wood of the porch, you turn to face your rescuer, uncertainty tying slippery knots in your tummy.
Because there’s clamour coming from inside. There’s people in there.
The momentary hesitation allows you to get a good look at your rescuer: he’s greying and dark—mixed, likely, or just disposed to a stubborn tan—and probably in his mid forties. Probably handsome, too, if it weren’t for the resident cruel scowl deepening his apathetic expression, or the violence dancing in his eyes.
A raise of his eyebrows.
“I tell you to stop?” He nods towards the looming house. “Move.”
But… you don’t.
“Are you gonna kill me?” and you’re downright shocked by the strength—the resignation—of your tone, the way the question comes out so matter-of-fact.
That sparse mustache crinkles in the corners, teasing into something wicked. “You want me to?”
“No.”
“So get movin’, then.”
That left little room for debate.
So, you turn, fingers and knees shaking with anxious anticipation. He cuts in front of you at the last minute, shoving the front door open with his knife at his side—for you or for something else, you’re not entirely certain.
He pulls you into the foyer by your forearm; to your great dismay, you’re faced with an entire group of middle-aged men. Killers—for sure—leering at you with that same starved, animalistic look your rescuer had fixed you with.
Then, he tosses the bag on the floor.
“Found ‘em by the school. Decent haul.”
Their eyes tilt to your shuddering frame, dwarfed by the jacket weighing down your shoulders. One of them looks strangely familiar, proud features reminding you of something else you were afraid of. “No shit, huh,” he commends, “Nice work, Joel.”
Joel.
As the shaggy-haired man speaks, his voice strikes familial resemblance, and it dawns on you. Your rescuer’s brother, or at the very least a cousin.
And what he says is a clearly marked taunt. That much is clear. Uttered with the kind of cruel camaraderie which collected on the tongues of men who committed acts of violence together.
Who hunted together.
And it’s obvious you’re not being rescued. Just… reclaimed. Redistributed.
Fuck.
Another voice joins the mix. “How much you think y’could get for her?”
Joel’s profile turns, harsh, brutal lines forming as he assesses you. “Depends,” and then—ohmothermary—he smirks.
“Gonna have to test her out first.”
A few snickers.
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.
You’re trapped with nowhere to go, once again surrounded by a gaggle of soulless monsters. Fear grips you, but thankfully, it’s muted, now, having been mostly expended during the harrowing events of the morning.
Just an hour ago, pressed to the side of an abandoned house, you’d allowed yourself to give up.
So, it feels easy—natural—settling back into that rhythm.
To submit to your inevitable, violent fate.
Joel’s voice cuts through the clamour of your racing thoughts. “Upstairs, the room with the open door. Go.”
Eyes glued to the floor, you put one foot in front of the other, your insides twisting and turning inside your core. Fuck, you can feel the pairs of eyes following you with every step you take. The stairs creak as your weight presses into them, squealing like wounded prey.
“N’ take that fuckin’ jacket off,” Joel calls after you, the echoes of his booming voice and the group’s degrading laughter chasing you all the way up into the room—the one with the open door.
And it’s nice, surprisingly. Dusty, admittedly, and clearly having belonged to someone else—a long, long time ago—but the bed is made, the window lets the light in, and the walls remind you of cinnamon.
No, this wouldn’t be the worst prison. Or the worst place to die. It’s a sure-fire step up from the gutter between two dilapidated houses.
You keep the jacket on, shivering under its weight. Even as you hear footsteps climbing the stairs, even as the more rational, civilized side of your mind urges you to accede to your (non)rescuer’s every command.
The conversation downstairs dies off just as Joel rounds the corner, appearing in the doorway—a giant. Though your stomach lurches, and though your legs feel like putty, you hold your ground.
“I’ll fight, you know,” you hiss, watching him seal off the entrance to the room behind him. His flannel has droplets of blood on the collar—reminders of your previous captor—would your other attacker have been a better option? Who’d be more merciful to your quivering body?
You charge your voice with every last modicum of strength at your disposal. “I’ll fight.”
He turns, smirking softly at your clenched fists. “S’good, sweetheart. I like a little fight.” He stalks towards you, swiping his thumb along the plushness of his bottom lip, his intimidating presence forcing your back to meet the flat hardness of the wall behind you.
So much for fighting.
There’s nothing living in his eyes as he says it—nothing save the roiling flames of hunger: “You see those guys downstairs?”
You glare up at him, trying not to notice the alluring hook of his nose, or the way your body works against you, responding to the earthy smell of him.
Then, you nod, wordlessly.
“Did you count ‘em?” He splays a hand beside your head, using one hand to pry your arms uncrossed.
Again, you nod. “How many?” He asks, his voice deceptively soft.
“Five.” Breathless.
“S’right, sweetheart. Ever had your lil’ holes stuffed by five guys at once?”
A swallow, and your voice cracks when you’re finally able to put it to use. “No.”
He pries your elbows to your sides, pulling the beige fabric open, revealing the torn remains of your underwear.
It’s almost a croon, feigned concern underpinning his low tone. “You wanna see what it’s like?” He drinks in the sight of your bare chest, almost groaning at the sight of your naked front.
It’s not cold anymore; no, suddenly you’re very hot.
“No, please, no.”
He slips the coat off of your shoulders, letting it fall in a heap to the ground. He assesses you once more: studying every square inch of your skin under his shadowed eyes.
“M’only gonna say this once, sweetheart.” All that fake-gentleness fades from his tone, replaced by the sadistic, authoritative timbre he’d first greeted you with. “I need you to be very careful.”
You’re frozen—all that fight, it drains out of you, captivated by the raider’s looming form, his mesmerizing speech.
“You’re alone, yeah?” A nod, which he acknowledges, trailing a hand up the length of your waist. “S’what I thought. N’ the way I found you today? That’s a best-case-scenario for a girl like you, out here on your own.”
He drags a finger up the centre of your breast, skilled fingertips just barely brushing the peaked nipple. You lean into his touch—the near imperceptible arch of your back doesn’t go unnoticed, and you kick yourself internally as the corners of his lips twitch up.
Still, the raider ignores your trembling.
“You’re mine, now,” he continues, egged on by your involuntary movement. “Means you’re gonna be a good girl n’ do as I say, n’ I’ll make sure I’m the only man who touches you.” His big hand drops to his heavy silver buckle, and the clearly defined, bulging lines underneath it have your heart clawing out of your chest. Joel senses your fear—and it only makes him harder. “I don’t like sharin’ what’s mine, y’know? But you try anything—you step outta line—I’ll throw you to my guys downstairs.”
His hand finds your throat, hunger and warning beating to the same rhythm in his gaze. “I have no problem watching.” He gives your larynx a squeeze, multitasking as he pulls the strap of his belt through the worn loops of his denim. “Understood?”
You have no words left, shaking from head to toe as the reality of the situation finally settles in.
As he works the intimidating weight of his cock out of his jeans.
A huff. Joel flips you over, impatient, pressing your scraped up cheek to the cinnamon-brown of the wall.
Déjà vù.
Your knees are separated by his own, and his weight flattens you. He wastes no time: lining himself up, his tip separates your folds. Resistance is futile—with one hand, he holds your thighs open—even as they try to press themselves closed, even as you whimper at the rough, male knuckles pressed to bruise on the insides of your legs.
Leaving his mark.
It’s not an option to simply take it. Joel forces you to participate in the sinful act: “I asked you a fuckin’ question,” he growls, gripping your chin indelicately. “You understand me, girl?”
A swallow and a flinch as you feel the head of his cock poke at your entrance. “Yes. Okay. Yes.”
“Yes, Joel,” he corrects. “Use my name. You’re mine now. Use my fuckin’ name.”
Tears prick the corners of your eyes at the promised savagery in his tone. Holding back a sob, you respond: “Yes, Joel.”
You watch his hand, large and capable, splaying out a mere inch away from the tip of your nose. “Good,” he commends. “Z’are the only fuckin’ words you know, from now on.”
His free hand slaps against your hip, yanking you down onto his hard length. Your hips buck up against his abdomen, responding to the pull of his fingertips, even as you cry out at the sting, the stretch. The raider tries to force himself between your walls—muttering a grunted “shit”—and thrusting up against your ass.
But you’re too tight, too tense, and your stubborn body refuses to open up for him. Finally listening to you.
“Relax,” he orders, surprisingly softly. He moves his hand from your hip to the apex of your thighs, rubbing rough circles against your clit. Fuck, how’d he find it so fast? You gasp at the feel of his fingertips against your most sensitive, touch-starved spot, hating yourself for the way his pressure makes you feel.
Because…
Because—fuck.
It feels… good. The man knows exactly what he’s doing—methodical in his ministrations, prepping you only enough to ensure his own eventual pleasure. “S’too tight, baby,” he breathes against your neck, “Need to loosen up for me, yeah?”
He’s not gentle. No part of it is gentle. Nonetheless, pleasure ripples through your centre and down your thighs as he effectively turns you on.
“Thaaaaaa’s right,” and his voice is mocking and taunting and degrading as he drags his digits away, grabbing and pulling at your breasts, instead. Feeling the involuntary release of your cunt, Joel finally pushes himself in, sheathing the long, thick length of his cock inside you.
“Need to show this pussy what it’s fuckin’ made for.”
A current of pain flutters up your cunt just as he fills it up to the brim. You can’t help it—your stoicism crumbles to dust—and a soft, scared, pained whimper tumbles from your lips.
And he groans at it, thrusting roughly, over and over again. And again. “Hurts, does it?”
His breath is hot against your ear, and despite the fear, the ancient instincts gripping your bones, telling you to run, run, run, fight, fight, fight—it’s… enticing.
Hot.
“It hurts.”
He laughs, low and dark, bringing his hands to circle your hips, steadying you as you stumble on your tip-toes.
“Cry about it.”
And he keeps on going, tearing you open. The way his girth touches every starved part of your insides leaves you wanting, even despite the sting of his fingernails biting into your hips, the tears and cuts stinging at your opening.
You hate yourself for it.
But you clench around him, stifling a pathetic moan.
God, no—I am not enjoying this.
He breathes another laugh. “Feelin’ full, baby? Tell me how good it feels, c’mon,” and your inhalations come in heaves as he pounds into you, delivering a harsh slap to the side of your hip, hard enough for your skin to ripple from the contact. “Do as I say.”
When you refuse to sate him, swallowing all of your little noises, Joel grips your throat, bringing your head slamming against his shoulder. Your back arches into a perfect crescent, spine contorting at his will. A gasped cry fans out against his salt-and-pepper jaw.
A sob—of fear, of frustration, of reluctant pleasure. “You’re evil.”
The grip on your throat tightens, and he looses another laugh, squeezing your skin, muscles, and tendons oh-so-tight.
You’d be wrecked, bruised—branded—come sunrise.
“Yeah?” He groans, cock slamming up into your very guts.
“M-mhmm—” and the saltwater tears start pouring, trailing glistening slopes down your cheeks in long, long lines. Distantly, you hear his answer—“Yeah, well, you’re wet”—as those silver droplets keep on falling. Where they come from, you aren’t certain; of course, the terror, the physical torture, and the frustration at your entrapment contribute to the mess under your eyes.
But that warmth… the unbridled desire radiating between your thighs… that wasn’t helping, either.
“Fuuuuck,” he groans, muttering another “S’it—s’right,” and releasing your throat to tilt your head up to face him. He drinks in his creation, the ruined sight of your tear-stricken face, and his cock swells between your beaten walls. “God, you look so fuckin’ pretty takin’ it from me—cryin’ like your lil’ pussy ain’t desperate for this.”
Joel smiles when you sob.
It goes on for a while. He doesn’t tire quickly, bringing you right up to the edge of reluctant ecstasy before you remind yourself of the hatred you owed the man fucking into you. You get used to the sound of his hips snapping against your skin, your cries mingling with his gravelly, low grunts. It’s a dirty, depraved symphony—orchestrated by the monster between your thighs.
You can’t help the moan that escapes your lips when he finally, finally brings his fingers back down between your legs. He grunts in approval, barely grazing the length of your folds, pressing his thumb into the delicate flesh of your thigh, instead. “Dirty lil’ girl—fuckin’ dyin’ to be an old man’s whore, z’that it?” and he doesn’t even touch you, focussed on his own pleasure, but the proximity alone is enough to have you wrecked.
And you just can’t help it: “J-joel—”
“Y’know,” he chuckles, slightly out of breath, slowing his strokes to address your wanton whine, “You’re gonna make such a good lil’ fuck-toy, baby, f’you keep makin’ those pretty lil’ noises for me.”
The reality of the situation comes barrelling down on you as he acknowledges—praises—your enjoyment of his torture.
This man… this man was cruel. He was hurting you, and enjoying it.
You struggle against him, a pathetic show of weakness. Joel holds you in place effortlessly, arching your back further, keeping your hips preened back to receive the harsh thrusts he delivers to your torn, ruined cunt. “Where you goin’?” He laughs at your pathetic attempt at resistance, grips tightening. “Thought we were havin’ fun, baby—don’t it feel good?”
And he quickens again, slamming into every needy spot inside you. His breaths grow shallow, as rough as his hands and the ferocity of this punishment.
“No,” you manage, fingernails digging into his forearm.
He tuts, the vocal click constricted with lust, and his hand travels the length of you, settling against that aching bud between your thighs. “Fuckin’ liar.”
He presses down, proving his point. Your entire body tenses as pleasure ripples through you—despite your best efforts, climax crests through your core, threatening to implode within you. Joel hums, smirking when he feels your legs parting even wider.
“S’mine now, alright? You’re mine now.” He crams every inch of his cock up inside you, pulling you flush against his chest. “S’okay to come for me—s’okay, baby, I want you to—s’fuckin’ right, let go for me, baby—” and his crooning takes you over the edge.
Christ, it feels so good.
You clench around him, high-pitched pleas and moans tumbling from your lips, his own pair dragging down the swoop of your ear. In that split second, Joel—the devil at your back—is your favourite thing in the world: your hero, your haven, your God. Fuck, you could just kiss him, marry him, fuck him over and over and over and over—
A hand clamps over your mouth during those brief, blissful moments; the man practically bounces you up and down the length of him, muffling the cries of pain and pleasure tearing from your sore throat against the rough skin of his palm. He groans inside your ear—a stammered, sinful “fuuuck”—and then he’s spilling his seed inside you, shoving it impossibly deep as those quick, harsh strokes stutter and slow.
You come to, waking up from your pleasure-drunk daze. Before you get the opportunity to wriggle away from him, the monster flips you over again, slamming your shoulders to the wall. With his forearm barring your chest, and despite your fear and ire—somehow, all you can think about is the fact that he’s not as out of breath as he really should be (given his age and, of course, what he’d just done to you).
Joel leaks out of you. His cum paints masterpieces down your legs.
He slides his free hand down the length of his cock, collecting the last bits of slick clinging to him and not dripping out of you. The intermingling juices are brought to the roundness of your breasts—the raider slathers your sore peaks with his own spend.
“Nobody’s gonna fuck with you—but that means you’re Joel’s girl. Hear me?” With your head bowed, you glare up at him through silver-lined spider lashes, shame beating at your cheeks. When you hum your acknowledging “uh-huh,” the stranger continues on, gripping your jaw to angle your gaze up: “Means you listen—you-you don’t fuckin’ try me—n’ you take everything I give you, every fuckin’ time. Understand?” He tucks his softening length back in his pants, dark eyes dancing with satisfaction as he leers at your destroyed form.
When you don’t respond, he brings the back of his punishing hand colliding with the side of your face.
Something between a squeal and a gasp tumbles from your lips; Joel catches it, placing the pad of his thumb to your bottom lip, pressing down. Your cheek stings from his harsh slap, delivered on top of the scrapes and wounds a different cruel man had left upon your skin.
“I don’t wanna hurt you, baby, but I will f’I have to,” and he’s earnest, commanding and pleading at once. “You gotta answer me.”
Slowly, you croak out a timid, “Yes,” and an “I understand,” followed by a final “Joel.”
Nodding, he straightens, the violence in his gaze fading just minutely. When he lets go, you stagger—the raider senses the instability of your knees, reflexively snaking a steadying arm around your waist.
You’re not sure where the impulse comes from. Perhaps it’s exhaustion, the aftermath of your orgasm, or maybe it’s just a sick, twisted desire to sink into something beyond your body—either way, you respond to Joel’s support by throwing your arms around his neck.
And he responds by lifting you, walking you over to the bed, and tossing you down on the sheets. Awakening into reality, you scamper back, grabbing and yanking at the surrounding bedding in a desperate attempt to cover yourself.
But Joel pays you no mind.
Having had his way, he’s through with you—for now. Nonchalantly, apathetically, he runs a hand through his hair, tracing heavy steps towards the door.
“Lock the door when I leave,” he instructs, but his tone is soft… possessive and commanding, yes, but… caring. “Don’t open it for anyone but me.”
He waits for your show of understanding, your near imperceptible nod.
Then, he sighs, yanking on the handle and giving you his final address over a pair of creaky, squeaky, rusted hinges. “Try to sleep, sweetheart—got a long night ahead of you.” Chuckling to himself, he leaves the sanctuary of the room.
All you can hear as your body grows heavy and warm, travelling somewhere far, far beyond this violent world are the echoes of male laughter down the hall, and a familiar, satisfied, gravelly voice:
“Not worth much, now. Might just fuckin’ keep her.”
And you slip away, dreaming of belt buckles, blood-stained collars, and the lung-squeezing heat of the setting Texan sun.
—
He used to call me DN
That stood for deadly nightshade
'Cause I was filled with poison
But blessed with beauty and rage
Jim told me that
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
Jim brought me back
Reminding me of when we were kids
With his ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
I can hear sirens, sirens
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
I can hear violins, violins
Give me all of that ultraviolence
He used to call me poison
Like I was poison ivy
I could've died right then
'Cause he was right beside me
Jim raised me up
He hurt me but it felt like true love
Jim taught me that
Loving him was never enough
With his ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
I can hear sirens, sirens
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
I can hear violins, violins
Give me all of that ultraviolence
We can go back to New York
Loving you was really hard
We could go back to Woodstock
Where they don't know who we are
Heaven is on earth
I would do anything for you, babe
Blessed is this union
Crying tears of gold, like lemonade
I love you the first time
I love you the last time
Yo soy la princesa, comprende mis white lines
'Cause I'm your jazz singer
And you're my cult leader
I love you forever
I love you forever
With his ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
Ultraviolence
I can hear sirens, sirens
He hit me and it felt like a kiss
I can hear violins, violins
Give me all of that ultraviolence
—
TAGLIST: @millllenniawrites @inkedells @stardust-chords-enthusiast @mattmurdocksgirlfriend @bookofbee @liviloo12346 @anyas-stuff @readingsunshine97 @maudlinflowers @sullysflm @sexygaypalpatine @livyjh @s-unflowxr @lostsoldieronahill @chapterhappygirl @raeluvshammett @silkiers @jupitersmoon-cal @supernaturaldean67 @razrsharpwhiteteeth @peqchsoup @corrodedcherries @hawsx3 @monboudoir @theonewithacrush @pono-pura-vida @sallymilkweed @fruitcupsworld @mads-grace4 @ayehomo @dzaga890 @killerrxger @niallsbunny @cilliansangel @snowyarcher @grnherbs @mswarriorbabe80 @tercabed @sweettea-and-honeybutter @bbyanarchist @thisgirl-knm @pedrit0-pascalit0
TAGS WILL CONTINUE IN A REBLOG (there are simply too many of you & I don’t want this post to crash <3)
#joel miller x reader#joel miller smut#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller x female reader#joel miller x y/n#raider!joel miller#raider!joel#tlou#the last of us#joel miller the last of us#Joel miller fanfiction#Pedro pascal#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal x reader#tlou fanfiction#joel the last of us#joel miller tlou
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Chat I NEED a part two of the addicted fanfic with Izu with him being a mean dom bottom and us being sub top 😼
—and i go crazy because izuku mad cute pls give me more izuku
soo meann — izuku.midoriya
— dom ! male.reader x sub ! izuku midoriya
— contents : r4pe/non-con , subtop ! Male reader x dombot ! izuku , guilt tripping lol! and he’s mean .. , izuku slight sadistic fuck , hand job , biting , hitting , mad overstim , degrading nd praise , mention of izuku using u so he legit doesn’t gaf abt how u feel , knocking u unconscious , somnophilia if u squint
warnings : r4pe/non-can , lots of beating
- first part: addicted
✩°。 ��⸜ 🎧✮
after what happened at your dorm, it was very evident how attached midoriya truly was to you. He wouldn’t even try and hide it around others, if it weren’t for you shoving him away every now and then, everyone would’ve known he was fucking himself on you every other night.
during these nights you slightly expected him to be nicer every now and then but he was getting meaner and meaner, he started to hurt you.
Every time you tried to have a serious talk with him about it, he would make YOU feel like the bad person, he’d knock u out and you’d wake up to him on top of you
you push it aside after doing it because of how good it feels to be inside the green haired boy, all the problems just disappear and izuku knows that.
one night you guys just got back from intense training, you were exhausted. Midoriya was still sorta hyper, so he decided to bother you a bit more.
you didn’t realize he was following after you to your dorm, you were practically dragging your feet because of how tired you were. Everything around you was just silent, you didn’t hear anything.
you walked in and grunted when your hyper baby jumped on you, falling to the floor you let out a sigh of annoyance. you turn your body around and look up at izuku who was straddling you, dark big eyes staring back at you.
“izu..im really tired, can we not do it tonight..?”
“…no..nono you’re not tired, just let me do this” he started to rub your crotch with the palm of his hand, leaned down and left kisses on your neck while you tried pushing him off.
“izuku I…thought we talked..about - ugh..~” you harshly grabbed his wrist and moved him off you.
“you need to stop when I tell yo—“ you felt a sting when he slapped your face with his free hand, you slowly looked back at him but he quickly grabbed your head in his hands and slammed it down onto the floor.
you groaned at the pain in the back of your head, you squirm under the guy trying to get away.
“you’ll let me do this.. stop being so difficult.” he got back on top of you and grinded his ass down on your clothed dick as you let out small whimpers.
you tried to get him off but he didn’t listen and kept doing his own thing, taking your dick out and beginning to stroke it, having you break apart under him.
anytime you got noisier he would just slap you, each time harsher than the last.
“p..please izuk..stop..” tears fell down your face while he stared up at you annoyingly. “stop crying..you know you love it when I touch you like this..” his thumb slid against your slit, a moan ripping out of your sore throat and your eyes rolling back.
“c..can’t you be…nicer..” you said thru whines, he kissed his teeth and sped up his pace jerking you off and dipping down to bite your neck.
“shut up..” he would say before sinking his teeth into your skin, drawing blood. you’d scream and pull at his hair to get him off you, but he’d just roughly slam your head back down on the floor.
your breathing sped up when you got closer to coming, when you did, izuku would sit back up and lick up your mess. he’d help himself up just above your dick, his hole already wet and loose due to the many times he’s done this.
“n..noo izuk..I just came p-please give me a bit..” you begged the green haired, your hands going over to his hips only for them to get swatted away.
you throw your head back when he sinked down onto your length, your hands twitching and breath hitching.
“don’t be selfish, since you already..came, I get to as well..” he lifted himself up and slowly sat back down starting at a slow pace making this hurt more.
He was extremely rough with you and extremely mean, always slapping, biting, hitting and pinching because he loved hearing you moan and whine in pain. His goal all the time, was to break you.
Have you come so much that you start shooting blanks, so much that you’re drooling and panting like a dog and begging him to keep fucking you.
he’s only nice when you’re on the brink of passing out, he’d cup your pink tear stained cheeks and kiss you passionately.
“you’re doing well sweetie… just take it like the good boy you are, yeah..?~” you’d slowly nod your head and give him a trembling slime. He’d give you so many kisses and make you feel so loved just to then knock you out
“you’re just a toy I use to fuck myself” and he’d push the back of your head down on the floor hard enough for you to lose consciousness.
but you never remember that part.
When you wake up, you have a bit of a headache and izuku is sleeping soundly next to you, you just can’t let go of him.
you just hope one day he’ll be nicer to you when using you:((
a/n; posting two days in a row yeah i’m fucking goated as hell
#pls escape but not before dropping a like#he’s so fluffy#dom top reader#top male reader#male reader#gay#smut#dark content#boku no hero academia#my hero acedamia#izuku x male reader#izuku midoriya#mha x reader#mha#rapekink#tw noncon#bnha deku#aged up characters
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She honestly doesn’t do much to make me like her more I swear to God !!!!
Chat is it unnatural to hate your friend 💃
#I just tried talking to her#I swear to god like she is the definition of stem student stereotypes#yk business can be hard right ? everyone likes to think that it’s easy peasy LOL yall are so dumb#sometimes business is legit harder than pharmacy 😻 why do you think I sometimes get better marks in literal pharmacy LOL#pharmacy has a set series of things you study yk what to study like everything is GIVEN to you#business is chaotic and all over the place THATS why it’s hard#“you should see what I have to do” awesome habibti I don’t care about what you have to do after that statement#because you’re mentally stable#and before you tell me I have a chronic illness awesome cause that chronic illness doesn’t impact your memorisation ability not one but btw#sure it’s hard not saying it’s not but we LEGIT had a lecture on depression and you KNOW DAMN WELL that depression makes you not only non#functional but it’s horrible for the memory#and don’t even get me started on my headaches#I get atrocious headaches that make me cry sm cause why can’t I be like normal people#but she’s always like idk what you want me to do about it and ik there’s nothing she can do DUH#but why is it that she’s so much more considerate towards other people for general insignificant things AND she expects me to react in#certain ways to her issues but never to mine#I think having chronic headaches to the point of tears IN CLASS as someone who doesn’t cry even when Eris or my mum or whatever messed up#thing happened and yet I cried that shows how bad that is#yet she does not care#I swear to God this is the issue that nobody believes me on anything to do with my health !!! everyone is a freaking liar they’re like we#care BUT NO YOU DO NOT LMFAO how many times have I almost went to hospital yet YOU BRUSH IT ASIDE AS IF IM OVER EXAGGERATING !!!!!!!!#you have went to hospital ONCE in your life and fifty billion people visited you#I have been far more times yet no body fucking visited me ever#people ask me how I’m so tolerant ? it’s cause I had a shitty childhood filled with impossible people of the likes of her#and more !#and people wonder why I’m so insane now in fact I monitor my reactions to everything so well that literally no one has seen truly what my#insanity could consist of#not in the cringe way of hurting others LOL in the most self destructive way possible#this bitch. I should’ve ghosted her ass I should’ve told her how much I hate her since 2018 how much of a horrible person she is how#pathetic she is
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hey so im not the anon who requested the guys going to see barbie but i had legit just watched the movie today and it will mess you up emotionally like i am not kidding i almost started crying at the end some of the guys would be in LITERAL tears and then (maybe) laugh at the last moment quip they pulled at the end
A/N: I really want to see that movie, I’ve heard so many good things. 🥺 I will say, it was whiplash going to the movies with the Oppenheimer crowd and Barbie crowd mingling together. I would’ve preferred to see Barbie, but it wasn't my turn to pick the film. lol
When Movies Make Them Cry
THE DEMON BROTHERS & THE DATEABLES
0.5k words | SFW | gn!Reader
Content: Luke is mentioned in a platonic sense only, the other relationships can be read as platonic or romantic. Mostly emotional hurt/comfort.
Lucifer will cry watching movies but he hides it well. The giveaway will be his wet lashes and the slightly red, puffy skin around his eyes. Most of the tear tracks are wiped away before the lights come back on. He’s more likely to cry in private with you but not in a public crowd.
Mammon screams at horror movies, belly laughs at comedies, and sobs at tear-jerker moments—especially anything involving romance or tragedy. He often pictures you and him together as the romantic leads in the film, and that can be good or bad depending on the film.
Levi gets a little choked up but doesn’t usually cry. If he does cry, it’s in the privacy of his room when he thinks about the movie later on.
Satan and Asmo will both cry at touching romance or gut-wrenching tragedy. Satan comes prepared with tissues and Asmo dabs his face as delicately as he can so he can attempt to salvage his eye makeup (it doesn’t always work).
Beel might get choked up, but emotional movies linger in his thoughts for a while. He reflects on what he can learn from it to avoid more heartbreak in his life (he thinks they’ve all suffered enough).
Belphie might cry, but he cuddles into your shoulder so he can wipe the evidence on your shirt. He chuckles and pokes fun at his brothers for being so whiny but it doesn’t sound very convincing when his own voice sounds a little thick. (He won’t make fun of Beel if he cries.)
Diavolo’s the type that will cry at happy or sad endings. He doesn’t feel ashamed by it either, and he compliments movies that can draw out that type of reaction in him. He’s one of the first to offer you a comforting hug if you look like you need one. He also offers you tissues (he seems to have an endless supply).
Barbatos rarely cries at movies but similar to Beel, the emotional weight can linger with him for a while after. He has several packs of tissues to pass to the others should they need some (aka Diavolo’s endless supply of tissues).
Simeon is more likely to cry at happy endings than sad endings. He’s experienced so much heartache that it’s like a familiar friend rather than a shocking event. It’s the overwhelming love or joy characters share that touch him the most because he desperately wants to feel that for himself.
Luke cries but tries not to. He naturally gravitates to you or Simeon for comfort but tries not to be obvious about it—he doesn’t want the others to think he’s a baby.
Solomon is a mix of solemn contemplation after sad endings and joyful tears after happy endings. It’s difficult to find things that can touch those deep emotions in him after so much of his long life has passed by in a blur.
m.list | Related reading:
When They Go to the Movies [fluff] When Lucifer Watches Hachiko [emotional hurt/comfort] When Mammon Watches a Tragic Romance [angst]
#obey me#obey me demon brothers#obey me dateables#lucifer x reader#mammon x reader#leviathan x reader#satan x reader#asmodeus x reader#beelzebub x reader#belphegor x reader#diavolo x reader#barbatos x reader#simeon x reader#solomon x reader#obey me luke#obey me x reader#omswd x reader#obey me x mc#obey me x you#x reader#obey me fanfic#omswd fanfic#obey me headcanons#obey me imagines#gn!reader
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SPOILERS FOR MIZU5
Just read the entire story and aaaaajdjd😭😭
It genuinely made me stare at the ceiling for a solid 5 minutes and tear up (mainly because i love mizuki and somewhat relate to her)
All the memories with ena flashing before her eyes as she just stands there utterly terrified broke me the most. Ms hina (mizus va) and even and ms suzuki (enas va) really killed it with this one. Mizukis last words and the entire last chapter hit so SO HARD it was absolutely amazing‼️
Her room from secret distance which was once filled with everything she loves (and also was pink/feminine) now being dark and gloomy with a shattered mirror and broken mannequins is just heartbreaking tbh
Her dress also looks like its been torn and clawed at?? Im guessing the blindfold symbolises her feelings of not wanting ena (or the rest of the nightcord too) to actually see her like this + further more her fear of being shown kindness out of pity? (Im not really sure about how to word this) especially by ena
This is also the first time its been officially confirmed that she is infact trans (it was only HEAVILY implied but now its explicitly stated) i was sort of afraid they were going to backtrack but im glad they didnt do that
This event basically lived up to all the expectations but at what cost😭
Bake no hana (ghost flower in eng) fucking slaps‼️‼️ ive legit been listening to it non stop since release and there were a few details i noticed (+_+)
1. The total notes are 1003 on master with 1 being mizuki and 3 being the rest of the girls, showing the distance she places between them
2. Mizukis does not sing with the rest of the group and her vocals only ever overlap with kaitos
3. I havent properly searched up the translation yet but the lyrics seem all from mizukis pov (also the music video i think? With the blinking and all)
4. Even in the mv itself, mizuki is not present with the rest of the nightcord and only appears in frames with kaito
Her voicelines after the event are just depressing, she sounds so tired and sorta nihilistic (kinda like mafuyu in the main story) and shes also temporarily gone from the real world
Ena5 will most probably be in November and have mizuki as a 4* for the first time in an ena focus
Also something else i noticed in particular was
I guess this is foreshadowing for the next song in ena5 ? It seems so
All in all, these were my thoughts for the event (for now) kinda ended up writing an essay but yeah lol
#pjsk#niigo mizuki#akiyama mizuki#n25 mizuki#mizu5#pjsk spoilers#nightcord at 25:00#niigo#niigo ena#n25 ena#ena shinonome#i just want to give her a hug#mizuki my sweet summer child☹️☹️#mizuena nation how we feeling#my heart is in shambles#😭😭😭#also fuck tumblr i had to write half of this again + the tags cuz it didnt save the draft#thats the reason for the lazy writing by the end#sorry lol#prsk#project sekai
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just saw romulus im so so normal about it NO IM NOT. GOD IM NOT IM GNAWING AT THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE GAAAUUGH
my thoughts + spoilers under the cut :3
• giger would be so proud of this film. so yonic. so phallic. my god. Every vagina shaped thing gave way to the most sinister form of life. Every penis shaped thing was violently penetrating. Super duper leans into the original underlying themes of SA. got under my skin like crazy
• this film combined all my favourite elements of alien (slow burn immersive horror), aliens (great action) and resurrection (human/xeno hybrid) I literally cannot fault it at all
•the offspring (babymorph as me and my bf dubbed it) BAD BAD SO BAD THROWING UP IN MY MOUTH I was legit shaking and had tears in my eyes I have never been so close to screaming in a cinema. 1000/10 creature design. I knew something horrific and fucked up was gonna happen after the pregnancy reveal but JESUS
• Andy's actor was AMAZZINNNGG. The way he played "regular" Andy vs "evil fuckass weyland-yutani synth" was seamless and perfect and he was my fav character
• Ian Holm's cameo felt...... weird. I generally don't like dead actors being reanimated in cgi anyway even with the consent of the family yadda yadda but... blegh. The cgi felt a little dodgy on his face as well but tbh the glitchy jilted nature of it really added to him being a damaged synth LOL
• references were v cute. might be ott to some but I liked it
•PRACTICAL EFFECTS MY BELOVED. BIG SCARY ASS PUPPETS MY BELOVED. GOO AND SLIME MY BELOVED
• the whole birth scene shook me to my coooorrree. As someone who wants to be pregnant and give birth nothing has gotten so under my skin like that before. The ides of doing your best to nurture what will be your child only for this fucking horror to come out of you.... oh my god......... AND LACTATING THE GOO?? ARE YOU FR????????
• mostly smart characters in this movie which I appreciate! the whole zero g acid blood vortex scene was very funsies
• great score. Calls back to the original but not too much
• PERFECT set design. Felt like watching alien isolation as a movie
• I love that they went back to a more analog clicky buttons/flicky switches aesthetic, the holograms and touchscreens of prometheus and covenant never felt right
• the black goo as an almost intelligent substance is so so fun. It "speeds up evolution" but it's smart enough not to destroy its host outright. The offspring was gestated in an egg sac containing fucking acid BUT it didn't hurt kay (until she birthed it and it no longer needed her)
• also the offspring not growing its xeno tail until it consumed the last of the goo from kay? Very nice touch
• JUST. PREGNANCY AS A GROUNDWORK FOR HORROR. SO UNDERUTILISED. SO EFFECTIVE.
• this films chest burster scene... dare I say....scarier than the original. Watching her ribs crack with the xray machine.... YUCKY
• me and my bf has settled to calling the black goo Promethean Fire. This isn't part of the review I just like that hehe
• when I heard the name Romulus I mentioned to my bf about Romulus and Remus being raised by wolves and I was like "what if this is the start of the crossbreeds like in resurrection?" AND I WAS FUCKING RIGHT BITCH!!!!!!!!!!
•Sound design was excellent, the thumping huge heavy footprints of the xeno felt sososososososo good with the cinema surround sound auugghhg
ANYWAY I FUCKING LOVED THIS MOVIE. If u wanna share any thoughts pls do in insane about this :)
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