#im just. angry
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in every video that's been coming out lately about stalls and changes in the U.S. economy, there's this incredibly charged silence in all of them.
for example, i was watching a video on what happened to cause the decline of 'mid-budget films'. all sorts of factors were discussed, from the streaming wars, to corporate consolidation, to low attendance in theaters. all true, yet... low attendance in theaters is attributed to streaming, market pressures, and big names not pulling people in- also true.
but not once was the fact that 1,140,278 people in the U.S. alone have died since 2023 mentioned.
there are 1,140,278 less people to fill those theater seats than there were in 2019. That is 1,140,278 less people making, shipping, and selling our goods. that is 1,140,278 less people taking their earnings home and spending what little they have left on those goods, the only thing keeping our manchild-ran economy from crumbling into recession.
our workforce decreased by 1,140,278 less people because you KNOW it was the working class, out there dying for everyone else. our workforce decreased by 1,140,278 less people due to one cause alone.
but no one says it. no one factors it in. countless thinkpieces, videos, news segments, conversations overheard in packed restaurants full of maskless, spitting faces about how our economy is crumbling under its own weight because of the internet, because of countless natural disasters battering our country from all sides, because of global trade, because of anything but the factor that we lost 1,140,278 people to preventable causes.
this 1,140,278 people, gone from our lives, and this doesn't even begin to touch the number of people permanently disabled, unable to work. but that number is far bigger than we can reliably calculate. more than we could begin to process.
this, by the way, is the number for the U.S. only. the country i live in, who ranks second worldwide in deaths per million due to this one cause.
and after three years of this constant, ongoing mass dying, we don't say its name. there's an eerie silence around it, a gaping hole we dare not touch. lest we violate some sort of social rule, heaven forbid. we spit on the deaths of those 1,140,278 people every time we forget, and every time we let our government get away with not protecting or caring about its people.
tell me, when was the last time you acknowledged COVID?
#covid19#heavy stuff#im just. angry#grieving#and offput by this eerie hole in the discussion of. anything#those were all people with fucking lives.#edit: added a paragraph acknowledging how many are left not dead but disabled#as that is a huge part of this too
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idk i just like. ive never Lived in a country where government regulation existed!! i know like. it can and should happen but hell if ive been around to see it!! "people are forgetting before reagan" there ISNT a Before Reagan for a good chunk of us!!!!! were coasting off of hopes and dreams!!! ive got nothing solid to look back on :(
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IM GOING TO PUNCH A HOLE IN SOMEONES CAR
#WHAT THE FUCK MAN#caps#you're not evil dont worry I love you#BUT WHAT THE FUCK. I feel like sisyphus now#if I just blow my nose again it'll be clear right. right guys. if I get the mucus out I can breathe#IM GONNA BE ILLL IM SO ANGRY
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im shaking about everything happening in rafah right now. i can’t imagine so distressed they’re blowing them to smithereens, you can see the refugees hands and toros and legs blown apart. they’ve concentrated everyone into one area and at 3am in the morning they bombed them, threw bombs all over them. at the same time at that same moment israel aired an ad on the superbowl painting themselves the victim. saying they need to get the refugees home. they rejected the hostage exchange peace plan offered by hamas. they rejected a hostage exchange. they rejected the hostage exchange. they rejected the hostage exchange. saying it would be done soon. and now they carpet bomb the civilian refugees that they ordered to be concentrated into one area. in the past hour alone 30 confirmed martyrs. 60 confirmed martyrs. now possibly a 100 confirmed martyrs. the death is outrunning the time on the clock. it’s all just so much. it’s so heartbreaking and cruel. and still there are people in the world blaming us for all this. blaming palestinians for all this. how will they explain it? maybe cnn or the BBC or the guardian will say “100+ Palestinians found dead after being caught in artillery fire” they won’t say we’re killed, targeted, murdered, bombed. they won’t even say we’re human even if our guts and brain matter are stuck on the floor. i’m losing my mind.
#im so angry im so mad im so sad#palestine#im just so sad im so sad im so sad#there are so many heartaches#so many heartaches#gaza
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one of the things that's the most fucking frustrating for me about arguing with climate change deniers is the sheer fucking scope of how much it matters. sweating in my father's car, thinking about how it's the "hottest summer so far," every summer. and there's this deep, roiling rage that comes over me, every time.
the stakes are wrong, is the thing. that's part of what makes it not an actual debate: the other side isn't coming to the table with anything to fucking lose.
like okay. i am obviously pro gun control. but there is a basic human part of me that can understand and empathize with someone who says, "i'm worried that would lead to the law-abiding citizens being punished while criminals now essentially have a superpower." i don't agree, but i can tell the stakes for them are also very high.
but let's say the science is wrong and i'm wrong and the visible reality is wrong and every climate disaster refugee is wrong. let's say you're right, humans aren't causing it or it's not happening or whatever else. let's just say that, for fun.
so we spend hundreds of millions of dollars making the earth cleaner, and then it turns out we didn't need to do that. oops! we cleaned the earth. our children grow up with skies full of more butterflies and bees. lawns are taken over with rich local biodiversity. we don't cry over our electric bills anymore. and, if you're staunchly capitalist and i need to speak ROI with you - we've created so many jobs in developing sectors and we have exciting new investment opportunities.
i am reminded of kodak, and how they did not make "the switch" to digital photography; how within 20 years kodak was no longer a household brand. do we, as a nation, feel comfortable watching as the world makes "the switch" while we ride the laurels of oil? this boggles me. i have heard so much propaganda about how america cannot "fall behind" other countries, but in this crucial sector - the one that could actually influence our own monopolies - suddenly we turn the other cheek. but maybe you're right! maybe it will collapse like just another silicone valley dream. but isn't that the crux of capitalism? that some economies will peter out eventually?
but let's say you're right, and i'm wrong, and we stopped fracking for no good reason. that they re-seed quarries. that we tear down unused corporate-owned buildings or at least repurpose them for communities. that we make an effort, and that effort doesn't really help. what happens then? what are the stakes. what have we lost, and what have we gained?
sometimes we take our cars through a car wash and then later, it rains. "oh," we laugh to ourselves. we gripe about it over coffee with our coworkers. what a shame! but we are also aware: the car is cleaner. is that what you are worried about? that you'll make the effort but things will resolve naturally? that it will just be "a waste"?
and what i'm right. what if we're already seeing people lose their houses and their lives. what if it is happening everywhere, not just in coastal towns or equatorial countries you don't care about. what if i'm right and you're wrong but you're yelling and rich and powerful. so we ignore all of the bellwethers and all of the indicators and all of the sirens. what if we say - well, if it happens, it's fate.
nevermind. you wouldn't even wear a mask, anyway. i know what happens when you see disaster. you think the disaster will flinch if you just shout louder. that you can toss enough lives into the storm for the storm to recognize your sacrifice and balk. you argue because it feels good to stand up against "the liberals" even when the situation should not be political. you are busy crying for jesus with a bullhorn while i am trying to usher people into a shelter. you've already locked the doors, even on the church.
the stakes are skewed. you think this is some intellectual "debate" to win, some funny banter. you fuel up your huge unmuddied truck and say suck it to every citizen of that shitbird state california. serves them right for voting blue!
and the rest of us are terrified of the entire fucking environment collapsing.
#spilled ink#writeblr#i hope it is clear here that i actually very much care about equatorial countries#and that's part of what makes me so angry bc im like. climate refugees exist.#they've existed for a while!!!#and the reply is almost always ''should have thought about that before living on an island"#like fuck dude. do you need to like how people vote before ur like#your entire house shouldn't burn down each summer????#so many of these people make it their life to mock california that they think it's FUNNY#and im like. girl you should be fucking trembling. TEXAS??? ARE YOU LISTENING??#this is one of those times that like. i need to stress how fucking stupid it would be#to let trump win. bc he could have “reached across the aisle.” covid could have been#a MASSIVE commercial success. he has such a huge and bigoted and brainwashed following.#literally just a PR campaign called COWBOY UP and it's pictures of cowboys in bandanas#trump reinvisioned as the lone ranger fighting for the american people against covid. EASY SELL#and instead. companies bought him. it became political. it was not ''oh shit this is 1 enemy let's all be human''#it was ''you deserve to die.''#climate change should be GLOBAL. it should be like ''yeah i hate u but. we do all live here''#i don't have to LIKE my group members to do well on a team project bc we are ALL getting graded.#is that simple enough of an under-explaination lol
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?????????????
i genuinely feel like im seeing things, this isnt real, right? nobody truly has this much mental dissonance that they would tag their post with both 'terfsafe' AND 'transgender', right? RIGHT?!??!?!?!?!
but yeah its the 'transandrobros' who are proto-terfs, totally
#transandrophobia#im not even angry im just stunned anybody could put these words together and think they're being coherent#the calling for transmascs deaths thing is kinda cringe tho#like how does somebody say this shit with their whole chest
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HYUNJIN | SO GOOD
#hyunjin#skz#stray kids#bystay#staydaily#gifs#YeahhHJHHHHHHHH DANCE FOR ME HYUNJIN.#the red light making me like im an angry bull who’s about to run into the red flag at full speed#flight or fight instinct is triggered and im about to fight him#he’s just so perfect i fear 😰
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Thinking about the fact that Mabel and Dipper didn't know they had two great uncles.
Yeah they are 12 and at 12 I had a shotty understanding of my family tree- But really? Nobody brought up their great uncle? Stanley? Especially since they'll be staying with his twin brother, Stanford?
Shermie never went to Stan's fake funeral, which to me means the twos relationship was strained on some level. If Shermie is older that means his view of Stan was poisoned in some way, that even as kids they weren't close. If the Shermie is younger then he never even got to meet Stan and all he knew about him was how he failed his family. Hell, people probably barely mentioned Stanley TO Shermie.
The fact that Stan had become a black stain upon the Pines family name makes me so vividly upset. Stanley faked his death and the family just- seemingly decided to strike him from the record. To pretend he didn't existed to spare themselves the sadness and shame.
Stanford and Shermie Pines. The only children worth mentioning of Filbrick and Caryn Pines.
It was never Stanford that was lost to the world. It was Stanley, ever since he had to leave New Jersy- it was always him that had to be struck from the record. Change his name, change his state, change his affiliations, destroy the remains of ghost that was Stanley Pines. Kill him so the family doesn't bring him up, doesn't ask questions, stops asking "Stanford" about his twin.
I just keep thinking about the fact that since the day he made one single mistake all the way up until Ford walks out of that machine- Stanley Pines was killed and did not exist. And Stan himself had no one to blame, he had to play the part in his own demise- He is the only one who ever knew Stanley was alive and has been for decades.
He lives in the multitudes of every personality he's ever taken, all in the hope that he himself can stop being Stanley Pines.
#gravity falls#grunkle stan#stanley pines#STANLEYYYYYY#STANLEY THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE YOU STANLEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#sharky rants#Just. Imagine the fucking shame you have to live with#the shame that you can never be yourself. That anything you were is unwanted and forgotten#The shame of just BEING- Of taking space of- of /breathing-/#Imagine the world; your friend; your family; your colleagues being so ashamed of having known you#that you feel more comfortable with a persona to present.#You feel more comfortable stealing the identity of someone you care for deeply if only to help#If only to feel capable for once. To feel like you belong- Like youre doing something good for once#Imagine the shame that brings you to be comfortable not being yourself for 40 years.#ALL CASE YOU BROKE ONE FUCKING PROJECT??????? COME ON#I mean- the deeprooted shame was started from earlier. He was 'the stupid twin“; 'the troublemaker”; “the cheat and thief”#This was a long time coming#But those werent MISTAKES- The one time he genuinely made a Mistake he lost everything#Like he really mattered so little to the people around him#and he cant really blame them.#My cousin is a genius. Hes smart and academically achieved since I was a baby.#The only thing I had that he didnt was my ability to draw. to be creative. The guy for the longest time had a better social life then me too#I used to get brought to tears seeing his accomplishments- seeing people praise him. The shame lived in me any time I had to see him#The shame that I was the black sheep of the family next to the golden standard for a son- for a student- for a friend.#when I was none of those things#And Im lucky he was my cousin- cause if he was my brother that would have haunted me EVERY DAY rather then once or twice a year#Im better with it now; Im more content with who I am- But trauma dump aside-#I very very very much understand Stans shame in being the stupid one. The unachieved one in a family full of achieved people#the shame thats angry at him for being better. at the family for treating him special. and most of all at yourself that you cant be better#its a visceral feeling that I sadly understand
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Theriantok is very heavily centered around ableism and fatphobia. Transphobia and racism too but thats a conversation for a different time.
Much of theriantok is based around quadrobics and masks, not that this is a bad thing by itself! But it leaves open little room for people trying to spread information!
The algorithm pushes out people with pretty scenery, good quality, a nice mask, skinny body and very good quads.
This leads younger therians, (who are oft3n actually otherhearted) to only see that side! Only seeing past lives and connections, only seeing skinny bodies doing perfect quads with very palatable feelings.
Animal urges are demonized, doing messy quads is ugly.
Being fat gets you nowhere, your just cringe.
If your delusional in any way they hate you, and say your promoting delusions.
You must be sane, you must be skinny, you must be pretty.
I hate this culture on tiktok, i want to SEE my fellow freaks and creatures, animals who arent fully sane and their therianthropy stems from delusion. Animals who run around in the mud and growl at strangers.
I want animals like me.
#Weird tanget#Im just so angry#And out of it#Hhgfh#therian#therian community#therianthropy#bear therian#alterhuman#otherkin#alterhumanity#otherkin community#nonhuman#transgender
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act 4 :(
@chipper-smol and i came to a realization
#THID FUCKING GAAAAAAAMMMMEEEEE#i have more i wanna draw but my hands not working orz.. maybe ill get around to it later idk#i finally FINALLY managed to get inside that star room.. my own clone!! now neither of us will be virgins!!!!#i dont have anything to go off of but when the journal mentions making another 'me' it reminds me of loop saying theyre like a mirror#theyre always able to read siffrins mind without actually reading their mind (or so they say) but maybe it could just be tone matching???#or smth like that.. idk if these two things are connected though so maybe its more like subtext#i hope im not the only one who made the childrens hospital joke when it came around to color lore part 2#im also getting the sinking feeling of watching siffrin toe his way near the deep end like bro is so so close to losing it#i feel like if i knew nothing abt the game beforehand and why siffrin is looping in the first place my feelings abt this would be different#cuz id be pretty angry too if ive been stuck in a loop long enough to feel like everyone around me is pretending nothings wrong#than the fact that i have decided not to disclose im in a time loop and that everyone is living this day for the first time#although i also get hes doing this for a reason and when u believe in the universe i guess it also comes with sunk cost fallacy#'this is the path the universe led me down before i even knew what i wanted so all i can do is double down' THATS THE FATALISM TALKING#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#isat act 4 spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sona#puppysona#friends#chipper#doodles
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Song for September: Alive by Týr
~~~ The portrait in the background is a leftover from a scrapped June monthly, I had a feeling it would come in handy! Not sure what to say about this one except that this is probably in my top 3 favourite pieces that i made this year. Also I keep giving Lubi swords lmao
#genuinely curious how many people actually check out the songs i share every month lmao#im constantly split between finding a song that fits the image vs just recommending a song im really into atm#but most songs im into atm are so hostile (in a fantasy warrior kinda way) and they dont fit the vibe of the image AT ALL lmao#and im like nooo i cant make it seem like lubi is angry he doesn't even know what that is!!!#monthly lubi#lubi#oc#original character#luv#experimental#experimental art#sword
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enough about 'he'll keep calling you officer when he's angry and detective when he isn't'. Kim calls you lieutenant-yefreitor when he wants to say I love you
#disco elysium#kim kitsuragi#harry du bois#harrier du bois#kimharry#de#i don't trust esprit as far as i can throw him. he calls you officer when he's not angry all the time?? like in all of these examples#and detective when he's angry too! like 'you know detective one of your problems is that nothing ever seems to be your fault'#but lieutenant-yefreitor... that's love baby. its more intimate than a first name to him somehow..#like how he likes it more when u call him lieutenant kitsutagi not just kim. respect is everything to him. im a creature of pride you see#anyway im normal#🏺#de meta#disco Elysium meta#juha.txt
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Day 19: Show the real form
Previous/Next
(prompt list here!)
#i want yall to know that lamb is in negative danger from the angry staple remover#100% atk but 0 dmg 😔#he chased them bc they stepped on his tail lmao#narinder's eldrich form has spikes along his spine and the tip of his tail gets peeled to bone as well#his entire body becomes a weapon and im sure that has Nothing to do with his own perception of himself. big trust here#cotl#my art#narilamb#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#cotl fanart#drawtober#cotltober#cotl drawtober#cw gore#just in case#cult of the lamb
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Do people not understand that even if someone was surrounded by money and food and water and clothing and shelter, if they physically cannot feed themselves or dress themselves, they would die? Because i feel like some people think that the Great Solution is eradicate poverty and not "accept that some disabled people do rely on constant care and no amount of resources can substitute the need for human help"
Obviously poverty and inequalities in society make it harder for disabled people to survive but i don't think some activists understand that disability itself is disabling and disability isn't just an outcome of ones circumstances
#i hope i explain myself well im just pissed off because some people think the issue disabled people face is poverty and not their#actual disability. “it's okay if your disability disables you” includes people who require care and assistance from others#its not ableist to say that disability means i sometimes cant feed myself without assistance ... its reality#ramble#rant#disabled#chronic disability#disability#disabilties#cripple#angry cripple#cripplepunk#cripple punk#cpunk#chronic illness#chronically ill
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RAHHHh ok comics done I can post this now!!! He is having the worst possible time
#fop nature au#fop#fairly oddparents#fop a new wish#fairly oddparents a new wish#dale dimmadome#art#digital art#fanart#body horror#weredeer#idk why I made myself wait until the comic was done like I didnt show the deer stuff#Ough but Im too impatient to wait any longer#current idea is that transformations are based on mental state#antlers for general stress#more animalistic when hes miserable or angry#Generally just making whatever spiral he's already in way worse#I like to think he starts getting more mentally feral when hes mad but he notices it happening and gets so scared he stops being angry#Like the idea of losing his mind makes him genuinely terrified#he exchanges one spiral for another ♥#I had some doodles that didnt fit where he had particularly overgrown antlers#have you ever seen those pictures of deer with overgrown antlers they look diseased and I wanted to capture that#they are heavy painful and most importantly very unnatural#unfortunately drawing overgrown antlers is very difficult for me and didnt look nearly as nasty as I wanted#its one of those things you can immediately pin as wrong in real life but is harder to get across in a cartoony style
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
#i used to think it was romantic too and then i was like. now i see it as a HUGE red flag#writeblr#it is also almost EXCLUSIVELY said by immature ppl who think this is normal#fyi even if u think it's funny and ur like 'im an introvert it's just TRUE' like. you need therapy (ily tho)#healed introversion is just ''i would prefer to be by myself'' not ''i hate every person'' ... hate is not normal. that is not healthy#im sorry. i know it feels accurate. but if you're walking around with that kind of rage....#1. you're making a LOT of assumptions about every single person u have ever met. which is often unfair and unkind#and also usually involves judging people based on their worst moments or little mistakes#2. you are being unfair to the person who is ur ''exception''#3. there is a VAST difference between ''ur my favorite person'' and ''the ONLY person i like.''#idk i think this is just a personal bias thing tbh#im sure there are people who have this experience normally#but i have YET to find a man who thinks like this and ISNT absolute DOGSHIT. although tbh.... like. im sure he exists#when u hit like 30 some of the things that were once kind of hot now just sound fucking exhausting. like ''im in a band''#edit in the tags: i used to kind of be like this too. but the thing is that like. my life became so much more peaceful#once i started believing that people are generally good. like yes i am mad at the world at large#but it's just.... a very hard way to live. you're not a bad person or wrong for the ways other people hurt you and taught you to be angry.#but that anger will continue to hurt YOU. it will punish YOU. it will prevent YOU from making new deep connections. it will protect you yes#but it will also cause MASSIVE blowback. bc if you lose the One Person... your life will fall apart. i know this personally.#i really recommend just trying to be... cautiously optimistic instead. like. yes#people can be horrible and cruel and there are some communities (incels for example) that aren't worth that optimism#but i think like... most people will hold a door for you . most people want to help you find your wallet .#i hope one day you are able to find peace. i hope that rage eventually smooths over. i know how hard it is PERSONALLY#and i know what must have happened to you. and im deeply deeply sorry we share the same wound.#but i promise - sometimes we all need someone else to help us carry the weight. eventually the rage has to die so that we can let help in#i had to spend years biting at outstretched hands. i still often do. im still very wary . and my heart breaks that you flinch too.#here's the thing: i don't blame you. but we were both acting out of fear and pain. .... not out of healthy behavior. and ... change#was needed. i needed change too. rage was useful for a while. then it just left me isolated and bitter. i had to (with effort)#choose to let that rage go. and let people in . VERY SLOWLY THO LOL
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