#im just so shit brained i guess
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Me, remembering the Game Awards that year when the one VA talked so long it became a meme (just looked it up, it was 7 minutes 59 seconds)
Me, just now learning that at the NASCAR awards this dude got 4 minutes for his speech: ooouugghhh shut upppp
#to be fair the game awards gives a NOTORIOUSLY SMALL amount of time for their speeches#according to google 4 minutes is perfectly reasonable for an award acceptance even#im just so shit brained i guess
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personal happiness or what the fuck ever
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#jeans here too but ssh#snap sketches#i havent posted anything in what feels like forever and i GUESS i have to remind people i do draw sometimes. whatever.#aka in my brain i have at LEAST a five-page doujin where this gets incredibly nsft but i dont have TIME for that these days do i#so for now we get just. these scribbles. ill be able to make something exemplary again someday i swear <- optimistic#i think im going to close my comms off for the rest of december once i get through the batch i have now#which ... doesnt sound hard since the amount i have will probably take me to the end of december anyway 💀#i just need everyone to believe me i have better visions for yaoifying issue 309 .... the opportunity is right there...#like wdym the dream sequence is gon end on a panel of erik's eyes as he reinforces the idea charles needs happiness like scott and jean's..#call up your ex. right now charles.#what got me peeved about this issue is i have no idea what color eriks outfit could be vjaeLVKEJARK its like.#is he wearing a lab coat over a suit .... i think thats the intention ... or maybe it is a trench coat....#idk shit for me to figure out if i ever get the time to explore this thing again#LIKE UGH IM SCREAMING i have Such Visions that i dont have time to execute and theyre killing me#maybe ill just write them down idfk <- trying to write fanfiction ends even worse for me than trying to draw#anyways. im gonna drive myself mad good night everyone#i have to go to a christmas party tomorrow night. later tonight. whatever.#BYE
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WATCHED C3e99 DOWNFALL PART 1 AND UHHH I HAVENT DRAWN FAN ART IN YEARS BUT THE MUSE REALLY SPOKE TO ME THIS TIME
Step 2 figure out how the Emissary actually looks
#I VOTE WE JUST CALL HIM APPLES#my sibling and I were watching together and I was like noshir STILL hasn't come in yet I bet he's in the fucking crate#and then#Apples <3#BE APPLES#I've solely been referring to the emissary as Apples in all of our conversations okay I love him#im big in love with Asha tho I am very excited to see what the rest of downfall brings us#I feel like my brain was going 7000 mph the whole episode trying to remember every scrap of lore I could remember#idk maybe more art to come I guess???#everyone thank my good buddy P who can not see this post as it will be spoiler tagged for them but they somehow unlocked my art block#by introducing a What If Ashton Draws As A Coping Mechanism AU and I went slightly feral over it <33#critical role#exu downfall#critical role campaign 3#god my tagging system has gone to shit there is so much goin on#bells hells#it's not BH but that's what all the rest of the C3 stuff is tagged with so im just gonna do that for my own searching purposes I guess#sams art#cr downfall
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It's kinda funny looking back on old screenshots and edits I made 3-5 years ago because in a way they have changed a LOT yet at the same time also not all although the fact that my old computer could barely handle having FFXIV installed is kinda evident in hindsight lol
#ive played for 11 years now but its only as of july last year that i actually have a computer i can go nuts on#with editing and good graphics etc which is probably why ive felt such a stark jump in my abilities#like its MUCH easier to edit by hand when your pc doesnt freeze up and making the screen black out anytime you draw a stroke too long LOL#its kinda funny looking back though because i still rely on things i learned way before gpose was added to the game#to the point where i often forget there are new fancy tools i can use to help the process#and thats despite having used the crimetools for way longer than i havent at this point#same with gpose..... god. that shit was added january 2017 i think. so thats 3 years of learning when to pause at the right time#and using walls to angle the camera and to try and time weather and multiple tries in case skill effects looked off etc etc#honestly since i cant do much photography these days whether that be of people or of bjds gpose is like a balm to my soul#anyway im rambling LMFAO just a lot of nostalgia when looking back. ill have to hunt down some REALLY old screens at some point#just to compare with my newer ones!!! kind of insane to think about this as a skill one can improve on#especially now that suddenly its been like a decade almost of consistently doing it and yet i never stopped to truly think about it#as anything other than a thing you just do???? idk. i have a disconnect to myself and art as a concept i guess LMAO#art is what OTHER people do in my brain. *I* just fuck around to try things out for fun#anyway....#silvi talks
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has anyone ever experienced exploding head syndrome? i had an episode last night and it was truly freaky on top of it being random. i was dreaming something unfortunately violent and at the climax of the dream, there was a buzzing explosive sound that burst in my head, i even feel like i saw a flash of light with it. i usually have weird REM stuff (vivid dreams, laughing or shouting awake/in my sleep) and have even had childhood experiences of alice in wonderland syndrome, but this is the first time i had an EHS episode where i was crystal clear that it WAS EHS….it was freaky and pretty horrifying, but im wondering if anyone has also experienced it or found ways to mitigate it happening again? D:
#muerto talks#my supervisor saw online that it could be caused by stress#which like maybe#im constantly stressed but i feel no more stressed than i usually am#i also dont know if my brain being autistic and ptsd riddled makes ot just over active??? and it just mis fired i guess#ive also wbeen wakinv up pretty frequently after my first rem cycle#so usually around 2 or 3 am on the dot i will wake up#sometimes i go back to sleep or i use the bathroom#but pretty consistently ive been waking at thag hour#its weird#been having sleep disturbances and i dont know#maybe i need emdr or some shit
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come one, come all, to Marvin the Magnificent’s magic show!

my beautiful baby boy <3
[idk probably hour n a half. only pens used]
#guess what. tag time!#shark originals#the sharkhive#shark draws#marvin the magnificent#marvin the magnificent fanart#jse egos#jse egos fanart#i am not entirely sure why i’ve relapsed into this fandom so hard but im not lookin a gift muse in the mouth bc Holy Shit i haven’t felt -#- this creative in like. ages.#all of my recent posts’ arts were made in the last 3 days#which i am very happy with#i love when my brain is happily creative because it’s just. it’s nice. i love it
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i hate hate hate hate hate so much when people take you forgetting things as caring less about them or whatever it is you forgot not having meaning to you "enough" to remember
i forget things that mean the world to me all the fucking time like i'm sorry i'm just like this
#txt#sortofa vent ig#just popped in my head and sent me on agony lane#or even 'if it meant enough to you you'd set a reminder'#guess what#i forgot to do that too#because of the same shit#i have mega trauma brain my mind just dumps shit all the time and the important things go with it#and nobody understands how much i wish i wasnt like this#i dont need ppl holding it against me outside myself as well as if i hate them or never really care#I DO CARE#I CARE TOO MUCH IN FACT#EMPATHETIC TO MY OWN DETRIMENT#CARING TO A FAULT#its a balancing act im still working on#ok now its a real vent but nobody's done this to me recently i dont think so#smiles#peace signs#explodes#also also i dont mean 'im just like this' as in i dont try to fix it#i do#but its also like what can i do when i forget to remember#forget to remind myself to remember#which i already do and it works in some cases but not all
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no you know what im making a post about it now
SO per Rvb wiki, A'rynasea's model is a Halo Phaeton. Per halopedia, a Phaeton is 10.3 meters long, so more or less this scale right? not super big but hey, our boy Locus is on the run and needs something small and fast so fair enough right?
except
long story short: Locus breaking the scale of things is making me mad, has been making me mad for a WHILE now and the only thing i can feasibly assume is A'rynasea is bigger?? than a normal phaeton but as soon as you start scaling her up, Locus' claim that there int enough room for a third passenger doesnt make sense like, it'd be tight but as it gets bigger than a normal phaeton and you CAN squeeze three people in there
i know i know its rvb, logic doesnt apply here, but look i like to know the schematics when im in this deep and this shit is ridiculous
I reserve my right to bully locus for living in a fucking space prius
3D Model credits: Phaeton model here | My Locus model is a mismash of two models from this guy that i franksteined in blender to be slightly more show accurate
#rvb#red vs blue#rvb locus#rvb a'rynasea#technically#I CALLED IT AND SUV/SUBARU BUT NO ITS NOT EVEN THAT BIG#im shaking him#yes i color coded my notes w red team colors what about it#im just#face downon the ground#trying to design an interior for a'rynasea for art reasons and its like this#there is no interior its just fuckin walls#the bright ass walls we see in the shots w grif in the pock pit w locus isnt the cockpit its the entire goddamn ship#also the entry is on top so take from that what you will#this is in the same file folder as my technically-rvb-but-basically-halo-oc's similarly stupid ship layout so like its just a Thing i guess#my star wars fixation brain got too used to being able to find layouts from swtor and ttrpg shit that now im improvising#for smaller craft and covenant craft from halo and im just#banging my head on the wall for no dang reason#i hope the red rage in this fuels other people to laugh at this please
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me when the project i put an absurd amount of work into still fails to reach my ludicrously high, literally impossible-to-hit standards
#every day i wake up catastrophize abt shr for ten hours and then go to bed#i hate my brain i litearlly despise it. “erm this comic isn't as good as dungeon meshi” YEAH MAN NO SHIT????????#guy screaming at other guy meme can i pick something other to compare myself to other than like. the golden standards of comics#this is my first ever original project. it will not be perfect it frankly may not even be Good. logically i have accepted this#emotionally i will burst into glass and cinders if it isn't So Great So Good Yippee Yay#you understand.#vent#i guess ????? im just bitching#sparks speaks
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not the original anon to ur recent ask but… that post just made me go crazy for joemarrtee and lsu trio. joe is absolutely obsessed with his teammates esp his wrs. thinking abt that shirt he wore with tee tb and ja’marr’s faces on it. arghhhh he makes me go insane. and that bit you put on the whole tee’s agent situation🫨😵💫 and joemarr and jj… yeah they’re linked together forever. sorry im just insane rn. ur post did a number on me. so many thoughts.
side note has anyone made a name for joe and tee? and also yes to the tee and jj. yeah. okay. love ur yaps.
RIGHT????
I THINK. IT'S BECAUSE. joe just. falls in love with every weapon he's ever close to. just straight up grows terrifyingly attached and just refuses to let go. it's like he really can't he's sooo attached to everything of his past it's all in his wrists and his clothes and his offseason adventures and the way he speaks to everyone even when he tries to hide it it's also in your face that kind of paradox is so fascinating to me. and he's such a giver he gives and gives and gives and that makes them fall in love right back you know. and ja'marr is just. he has this incredibly ridiculous standards that is insane and only he knows and refuses to tell literally anyone and they're honestly impossible to reach but once you do you're set for life he takes care of you period he will never be able to be chill about you ever he will say and do insane things about and for you and you can't refuse for shit. that bit of devotion is just so insane to me how did he grow into this. what made him like this. while tee is just. he's a sweetheart. have you ever seen or read a lick of his childhood i shit you not that shit moves you you will not recover and after all that tragedy he ends up as this absolutely beautiful soul with such a beautiful heart and beautiful smile and beautiful everything it's no wonder his team and the entire whodey nation falls in love with him really. and justinnn i know he's like not part of the bengals but he's so intertwined with everything because of joemarr and lsu it's kind of hilarious. and the amount of talent in him is crazyy and when you find out his lore of like. not being Noticed as a good receiver and flash forward being The receiver itl? but just the way he speaks? he's sooo humble about himself but he also knows he's leagues beyond everybody else. absolutely compelling. gorgeous.
LIKE YOU CAN WRITE SOOOO MANY NARRATIVES AROUND THESE FOURRR and i have so many. so fucking many. any possible combination of these 4. even fucking jjtee that's like basically strangers originally. any possible ship with ja'marr who is my no. 1 (guilty sorry truly coming clean here ja'marr really is that bitch to me if it isn't that obvious yet lol) i can go absolutely crazyyyyy with as you can see from all i have written in this blog god what is wrong with me 😭
I ALSO THINK this is because. i'm too in love with them?? i fear i write like i'm in love with them. do you get me. like who even knows if they're actually like this. but i write them like this. and i write like they're in love with each other so. well. there's that.
AKFLAJSLK I DONT ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT YOUR ASK IS ABOUT IM SORRY I JUST RAN WITH THIS I YAPPED ABOUT THESE 4 FOR LITERALLY NO REASON
thank you for loving my yaps 😭 i just wanna say that like. sometimes i yap with just. no thoughts. zero thoughts. please don't expect much when you ask truly i don't have much thoughts sometimes really 😭😭😭😭😭😭 but do ask anyway LMAOOO i do love getting asks
oh ship names! like generally i guess? like joemarr, joetee, teemarr, jjmarr, jjtee. what's justin and joe joejj? jjjoe? jjoe? 😭 the classic joe/justin?? the bolded ones are the ones i use personally.
oh and ja'marr ships are usually tagged with <'> too like joe'marr! but may i have a very guilt ridden confession of just tagging shit as joemarr because <'> messes up the tagging system :')) like if you search up the ja'marr chase tag link there's the 'tagged/ja’marr%20chase' and also the 'tagged/ja%27marr%20chase' :) that fills me with so much agony nobody touch me please i try not to think about it too much or i'll try to kms ahaha.
#ask#truly sorry for not answering all my asks in order btw some i just take longer bc i answer longer (?) like. as in more words.#also longer to think on bc i Mull on it yk but sometimes i get instant word vomit on like this!#and sometimes i get nothing i just have shit ideas my brain is a sewage#i hate my brain sometimes idk#joe burrow#ja'marr chase#tee higgins#justin jefferson#joemarr meta#i guess#just to keep it in a tag for easy search#but truly i have never expected in my damn life#to be so invested#in sports men#in sports mennnnnn#in american football of all fucking things#FOOTBALL#football....#the fuck.....#i have never even once in my life touched a damn football.....#i don't think they even sell those in my country#no that's a lie I'm sure they do lmao but like im pretty sure they'd be stupid expensive for no reason
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morning
might paint this later but i think this is all i'm drawing for today
obligatory song rec
#you open my brain and it's just karter & igor. cannot stop drawing these two even if i wanted to#sepbox#sepbox fanart#incredibox#incredibox fanart#tbh im starting to feel less of a point in posting these days#art has got to be the worst thing to be into cause it's less of a skill thing and more of a coming to terms with yourself thing#being okay with what you can and cannot do. being okay with drawing for yourself and yourself only#shit so bad i dont know if i'd rather have a larger following or a better sense of self-satisfaction#eh does it really matter in the end when you're just drawing singing men yaoi#no. same with most things really. nothing matters + just have fun + be content with what little good you can procure from this place#you've earnt it#and like. of course. keep on drawing i guess#draw man tiddies all day if it makes you happy i suppose
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"Jacob Fatu is what WWE always wanted Solo Sikoa to be." The same 5 songs. The same 5 songs. Wrestling fans, they play the same 5 fucking songs. Anyway, this is my incredibly long-winded rant about wrestling fans and Solo Sikoa's character.
To me, I think if Solo Sikoa was presented just like Jacob Fatu is now it would make zero fucking sense to his character. Even, or especially, to the parts they haven't really touched on much yet. Jacob is immediately presented to us as cold, emotionless (except like. anger.), a monster incapable of morals. He tears apart whatever stands before him without thought, just destruction in its purest form. As though this is just who he is and how he always has been. Solo wasn't always completely cold and merciless, not in NXT and not when he first joined The Bloodline. He was very closed off, but he was still human. There was still warmth to him. He still gave respect to his peers who he felt earned it, laughed and joked, he made friends or at least allies he was willing to trust enough to team up with. Solo wasn't a lost soul. He slowly became more "emotionless" in time after joining The Bloodline. The more he was left alone around Roman. And big notable moment of shift in his demeanor is when Sami left. Even when Jey at the time HATED Sami and Roman was still demanding him to prove his trust, Solo took to this weird little guy anyway. They became an odd couple pair. If Solo was always presented like Jacob, his progression into becoming so frustrated at Roman that he started to raise his voice and yell at him would have been nothing worth noting. Solo was quiet, Solo was calm. Solo operated like a machine; he took orders with seeming no regard to his own feelings on the matter and thus no expected pushback. Jacob is so like a ticking timebomb with everyone always on edge when he will explode. So chaotic and dangerous that even when he displays undying loyalty people expect him to pushback at any order at any given moment. Unhinged and unable to be leashed. Jacob is reactive. Solo was not. As Roman's enforcer, if Solo ever did seem to have his own opinion on something, he would look thoughtful and considering but kept it to himself. He has started off more vocal in the beginning, carrying into when he joined The Bloodline, but over time he retreated into a shell. He said nothing more than what was needed to be said. Despite being a family outcast Solo was brought to the main roster by the Elders orders, then acknowledged Roman without hesitation. Even when he propped himself as Tribal Chief he stated he would acknowledge Roman as the rightful Chief if he were to take the Ula Fala back, as if Roman had to earn it. Though where Solo's loyalty lies is always unclear, a loyalty no one can return in kind to him, he still seems to have his own idea of being loyal and earned respect. A system he believes. And Solo still has a vulnerability to him, one he even weaponizes. For Jacob's very debut Solo fell to the ground, pleading, eyes wide and doe-like enough to create pause before breaking into a maniacal laughter. Even talking about how the streets hardened him in his early NXT promos he had a vulnerability. A "hurt people hurt people" type who still seemed stung at being left behind and going forward is trying to prove his worth, that he does have value, to the very people who discarded him. He can bring gold to the family, he can keep them at the top no matter the sacrifice. What's best for the family above self. Jacob is unpredictable because no one knows what will set him off. Solo is unpredictable because no one knows which face is sincere. Solo and Jacob are not interchangeable.
#hello i am solo sikoa's defense attorney#i wanted to say a lot more but tumblr keeps refusing to save my drafts so i think its telling me to shut up lmao#and my brain always becomes too cluttered and disorganized with all my stray thoughts and im too lazy to detangle them and give up#so this will do for now ill just make gifsets of moments and do my tags that read like an essay lmao#i started this in january and had to erase some parts i half typed and forgot where i was going do you see how i am#and even if the company regards solo like hes fucking interchangeable with jacob hes still not#jokes on you ive been watching jacob (and zilla) matches way before jacob joined wwe and guess what i still prefer solo more#so make him some new merch shirts you bums#also wwe maybe if you didnt bring him up to the roster just to have him stand and be quiet for so damn long#and that time people were kinda sick of roman bc 'whats the point of him with the belt if hes never here' and then he went awol#and it was just solo and jimmy and they kept doing the same schtick every night so all that heat went to them#and then jimmy was out and it was just solo#and he alone became the sponge for all that mess#he deserves his praise for that alone what a shit situation that heaped onto him there#i need to shut up im in chatterbox mode and i wont stop#@ wwe you dont give a shit about his character hire me to write#i have always come up with multiple direction you could take him down i could give you bums so many options to work with
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minecraft movie looks fuckign awful and i genuinely wish it was a lego movie type of thing. but i do think the vids i see of people screaming the meme lines and stuff look like such a fun experience
#crunchyposts#mc#i mean i guess both are nice. i fucking guess#im just sad like im thinking about if it was a lego movie type of thing#maybe im a cynical jaded bitch but yk#i love a bit of dumb fun here and there and i think i might have fun w the minecraft movie but also i dont wanna spend my money on that lol#like it seems like its more fun w an insane theater and thats not always guaranteed so#but they have different purposes#one is dumb turn your brain off fun with a community#the other is like genuine good art that pays tribute to a game many love and minecraft means so much to me im getting emotional#i wouldve preferred the good art personally. i want animation man#the cgi looks like shit i really cant lie it looks so bad
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Ahahaaaa oh my goddd can you not make "ADHD undereating" and "ADHD overeating" into a competition of who has it worse and who has nothing to complain about, that'd be awesome
#im not even going to reply to that person im not gonna argue with someone who clearly is fucking#grading my symptoms on if they're as bad as their#guess what i also feel like fucking shit when i overeat and it causes my body a lot of stress#and it fucks with my hormones and it fucks with my mood#and i live a piece of shit horrible terrible life whenever I can't get myself out of that and somehow#but my brain makes me do it and it's hard to stop and sometimes i have to eat even when im in pain#cause that's the only way i can concentrate on something or the only way that i can stimulate my brain#even though i feel sick and I don't want to do it anymore so maybe shut the fuck up#oh my godddd#fuck that person#oh i would take overeating any day maybe shut the fuck upppp#overeating especially on foods that stimulate the brain well PUTS YOU IN THE STATE OF UNDERNUTRITION JUST LIKE UNDEREATING#YOU IDIOTTTTT#sorry this is so personal to me and someone just went on a tirade on how much they have it worse cause they don't eat#good lord go fuck yourself#that post was just because i never see anyone talk about this i only ever see the other side of the coin and it makes me feel alone
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school is making me miserable so here's a doodle sheet of akechi truths. hope this helps
#goro akechi#my art#<- i guess. how many times have i said i guess to this. sorry no new big or good pieces i have horrors in my brain#p5 spoilers#i guess#i suppose that.these r 'headcanons.' but these are just truths in how i draw this guy. also not my best akechi drawings for sure lol#would u guys be mad if i made another akechi animatic. <-if this happens it will not be soon i have So Much shit going on rn.#my mind is just doing things again (things being listening to songs and thinking about him)#anyway its rlly funny to me that gloveless akechi feels so naked but he doesnt Actually wear them all the time lmao. he does to me though.#hope this helps.#i did the jacket around neck thing as a little kid because it stayed there better than the waist. he on the other hand is doing hero moment#anyway my brain has long imprinted on him like a baby duckling. thoughts and prayers on the schoolwork im not doing.goro akechi#i hope he dies<- not true
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hey for no reason. if Raven was a car,, what type and colour of car do you think she would be…?
I had to delete a whole paragraph cuz in the midst of my delusions I thought you were asking what kind of car she would be (my answer was Aston Martin DB5 - dont judge I really love that car since I was a kid okay and I think she'll look cool as hell as one - and Porsche 914/6 shade 1110)
The simplest answers are black, silver and dark blue
I love really shiny coatings BUT personally I think for Raven her coating might lean more towards matte finish (look up satin black cellulose paint)
There are wayyyyy too many silver shade out there but lemme tell ya nothing beats a good ol bright silver metallic paint, I don't think the ones that are leaning towards pearl shades would suit her (slightly yellowish - look up Malaysia's Civic and BR-V in Platinum White Pearl Colour)
This one is oddly specific (and can you imagine I know this brand bcuz years ago Jeffrey Star's car paint job used one of these brands) but like cyborg blue or blue demon looks so hot (yay sparkles!!)
If we wanna talk about sparkles and fancy schmancy (but less durability) stuff it'd be vinyl wrap....like the gradients one ooooooo I think Raven would look so good with purple to blue matte kind OR OR the black to blue on the hood...
#anon u activated my monkey brain#its like a niche topic im too excited for esp considering idk anything about cars#i just like them based on vibes and builds (and by builds i dont mean horse engines and shit i mean by how the car look)#sometimes i go into the rabbit hole of like car vinyl/metallic flake instalment videos...bcuz its so satisfying#the issue with vinyl wrap is half the ones you see looks really cool on photo but kinda embarassing irl#idk why HAHA maybe cuz it's very...whats the word? like i guess cuz i only ever see those really extravagant bright colors ones on +#cars own by rich spoiled kids - so i associate negativity to it - but i gotto respect the ones who install them those look difficult#i think really tho Raven is either a black/silver (the lowkey vibes) or sparkly gradient (the confident vibes)#im a big fan of porsche bugatti and jaguar cars#all of which will remain as a daydream bcuz even if i sell off my house and use my student loans i cant buy the ones that I like#which are classic ones#god Jaguar supercar 1970 IS SO HOT imma- *faint*#I have a thing for round rimmed head lights#frankly this car hobby thing is bcuz of my dad cuz he used to have so many antique cars MAGAZINE (not cars cuz we broke here) around#and baby gomz loved reading them#still do#idk i can afford renting cool cars so I could do that in the future LMAO#you can watch me project this into NikRaven or PriceRaven sugar au#ask response#gomz niche rambles#which is surprisingly. cars.#[oc]Raven#cod oc#my oc
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