#im just so emotional over these children
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i don't know why, but in the sparse five hours of sleep i got last night, my brain decided to plague me with dreams of lilia taking care of an elderly silver, up until the final moments of his life. i could hear silver's thoughts the whole time, and he was so absolutely inundated with shame and guilt it almost seemed like he was suffocating. he kept thinking over and over and over again that this all should've been the other way around. he should've been the one looking after his father in the twilight of his life. he should've been his aging father's rock, his safe place to land, his stalwart defender against a world so unbelievably cruel to its most vulnerable denizens. again and again his heart cried out in vain, it should've been the other way around.
as a child he had once wished - prayed, even, to the same force now threatening to reclaim his spirit back into its unconscious designs - for his father to live a long and prosperous life, and it was as though that very wish had backfired on him in a way he never could have possibly imagined
#twst silver#lilia vanrouge#twst spoilers#twst#mumbles#txt#i hate it here#i litearlly woke up crying you gusy dont unerstand#he was so ashamed of himself but not once in my dream was lilia anything less than happy to take care of him#i feel like part of the reason lilia is trying to run away is because like so many of our elderly and our disabled#he didn't want his loved ones to worry about him and “waste” their time taking care of him#so he thought the best decision for everyone would be if he just went off to go die alone#i have no idea if twst would actually touch on something like that but i do think you could interepret his departure that way#anyways if any of you have caretakers or aides or just are disabled in anyway#i want you to know you are not and have never been and never will be a burden on anyone or anything#and that i love you so so much#im getting so emotional over a dream fkjgh but i want silver to understand that good parents dont have kids expecting that#their children will someday “pay them back” for everythinng they did for them growing up!! u don't owe ur parents jack shit!!#silver you just existing as you are is enough for your father!!!
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My partner finally finished BG3 but has no idea that his ending was actually bad cause he was a pro-Vlaakith githyanki who rode off with Lae'zel but got NO EPILOGUE where Withers points out y'all died im 😭😭😭
they have no idea what happened with Gale or anyone else (who was still alive) after flying away 🙃🙃🙃
#i cant even tell him cause hes gonna play again more “normally”#its so tragic he would like skip dialogue and just fight to get the jump on boss battles instead of waiting for the cutscenes to start#and he didn't exhaust dialogue trees!! like... how... why...#and also he staked Astarion 😭 and p much never reloaded#and didn't clear the shadow curse so no Halsin#also everyone at Last Light Inn died so Dammon was gone and Karlach only got 2 upgrades#and he didnt know moonrise towers was basically a second town#and his game was buggy a lot maybe? cause he kept trying to be hella creative with things and do things out of order#like killing gortash before doing steel watch 🙃#it's fine it's fine everyone plays differently#he tends to care more about gameplay than anything else but still!!#i just want him to know all the character backstories and see everything that made me emotional#i mean he did say he was sad when Lae'zel broke up with him in act 3 and when Karlach died and when he had Gale use the orb in act 2#which he considered his canon ending :/ sigh#i dont think he got Jaheira's lines about death#and he didnt understand why Karlach wouldn't go back to the hells#and he thought Wyll was happy being the duke (and has NO idea you could save his dad cause the mission didn't happen!! 😭)#the iron throne was like my fave mission outside of killing Cazador and I can't discuss either one cause he didn't do them properly yet 😭😭#he also avoided talking to children so he missed those quests and yenna glitched so no cat appeared in camp 🙃#sighhhhh cannot believe he plays so differently than i do lollll#he didn't even do unlimited kisses with Lae'zel!! meanwhile im over here kissing Astarion every night hahahah#hoping my partner doesn't see IRL if I have the office door open as if it matters lmfaooooo#i need him to play again and see why im in love with a video game character lol#maybe we could both um... benefit from knowing more about all of Astarion's scenes lmao#but like he has NOT SEEN Astarion's silly or sweet side yet just him being a bit of a chaotic vampire#and thinks i like him cause of vampires WRONG!! play the game again and see that i love his silly & sweet real self!#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#bg3#baldur's gate 3
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i wish i could remove the word “adopt” from kept peoples’ vernacular lol
#they constantly say shit about ‘adopting’ people and it’s so fucking weird to me#like it’s this cute and flippant thing and a sign of enjoying something#or whatever#and especially in fandom they use it for their blorbos and say they want to adopt fictional children and i hate it#adoption is not serious to people who are not adoptees at all and as adoptees we are taught to downplay the severity of our experiences#because if we say ‘hey that’s not funny’ then we get told told we are being too sensitive#we are a marginalized community that’s not even recognized as such and it absolutely fucking sucks and our trauma isn’t funny or cute l#joking about adopting people and characters is weird if u know what adoption really is#it is a LEGAL process that changes our identities and erases all biological lineage and seals our records (sometimes forever)#adoptees are 4x more likely to have mental health issues and substance abuse problems and we are more likely to be abused by our parents#and yet kept people wct as if we are not real people. we are constantly dehumanized in many ways#either adoption is romanticized or it’s a joke and either we are not human as our problems are brushed off#or we are not human and get verbally abused whenever we say something about how experiences aren’t always sunshine and rainbows#not to mention the fact that we are infantilized as well#it’s just… adoption is a different way of experiencing life. like my worldview is entirely different than someone who is non-adopted#there are things that have never even crossed their minds. they couldn’t imagine not knowing what their parents look like#or knowing their siblings or cousins or having multiple birth certificates or having a price tag over their head#yet adoption is just casual for them. it’s no big deal. YEAH IT’S NBD BECAUSE U ARENT ADOPTED!!!!!!!#keep our experiences out of your fucking mouth!!!!!!!#but someone will probably say im being dramatic or too emotional or whatever for being upset#like sorryyyyy. my bad! how overdramtic of me to be upset about not having the same rights as other people and not laughing along with them#god fucking dammit#adoptee voices#adoptee#adoption#adoption in fandom
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「A hundred years had passed. So, so much has changed in the world, but not as much to Kazukiー
And the golden vestiges of someone still donning an all too familiar scar, smiling on the back of his mind.」
#read tags#given how kazuki is...well he is immortal#i kinda wonder what would happen a long time after the post-series#100 years immediately popped to my head because i was listening to lyrico's kiseki no hana#everyone he knew on the island would be dead#:(#idk if kouyou is still alive#i mean most likely yeah but im not sure if he has the same blessing of eternity like kazuki#would make me fucking emotional if he doesnt#of course there are the mir children/core that keeps being born again over and over but theyre never the same person. yk#what if tatsumiya ended up sinking forever for good in the future#back to kazuki he probably had stopped aging and stuff like that (but still grows. aging =/= growing guys)#so he remained pretty much similar to how he look 100 years ago. just longer hair#i like to think he decides to grow out his hair so he keeps remembering soushi#soushi is technically still there in a way because he stays in kazukis memories#as sad as it is#bro im gonna fucking cry what if kazuki gradually forgets soushi#not in a moving on way but in a its been so long that his memories of him starts to slowly fade way#in the angstier scenario he starts forgetting soushi to the point of almost forgetting him completely#and hes traveling the world all alone again#for eternity...#(this considering kouyou doesn't have the eternity blessing)#FUCKING BAWLING#soukyuu no fafner#makabe kazuki#minashiro soushi#soukazu
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why doesn't chara & asriel live with toriel at all?
everyone's gone on without you
#ok now to actually explain it and not just post no context imgs#it was a while from the time monsterkind was freed to when asriel and chara came back/came to the surface#and in that time life had continued going on without them. as it had the same way when they died#im thinking it was anywhere around a year before frisk in their infrequent trips to the underground#was able to convince flowey to take a piece of their soul so he could hold his goat form together somewhat#and bring him back to the surface#but for chara it took longer. two years maybe? from monster independence day to come back#because frisk had to first find out where chara's real original soul was being kept and then find it and stuff#i can talk about this another time its such a huge can of worms my god#BUT BASICALLY it was a few years and by the time both kids were integrating back into society#the lives of those they loved had changed so drastically#chara didnt know their parents split up. they didnt know asgore killed human children or that their mother went into isolation#not until the game events anyways#and when they cam to the surface and saw all of that stuff -in person- as well as how well/poorly one parent was doing over another#theyyyy didnt take it well. like their mother had a new partner (doesnt matter who take your pick) and was raising frisk#and their dad was super mega turbo divorced and depressed and had nothing but his garden#in their mind toriel didnt need them anymore. she had a new partner and a new human kid and chara had served their purpose#so they elected to stay with asgore so he would have Someone anyone in his life and asriel followed#iiittts a huge mess basically. huge emotional landmine mess of insane proportions#undertale#my art#ask
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my vitriolic hate for the parentals only grows btw. everything i overhear is in fact a big fat negative in our relationship
#i am becoming less and less guilty about this the more they cause me grief bc all we fucking do in the polycule is reparent each other#and the ways they have both been horrible has basically been entire emotional neglect and constant abuse for having the gall to live#i have zero respect for them genuinely. i don't fucking care anymore#i barely enjoy moms company anyway because more and more all of our autisms clash#plus she called me codependent once so i stopped being a child around her. so#i really have no more parents anymore. i know my parents hate me. i know it#i dont want to do this anymore#I'm so tired of being alive#i really want to just die right now#fucking. mimi tries to be so sweet but its fucking hard id rather just stop trying to show any sort of love#i hope tht when the parentals look at me all they feel is how much i hate them i NEED them to feel haunted in their own house bc of me.#every one of both of my partners parents have basically been split on me. i was ok with them once until they fucking pushed me enough that#now i literally cannot see them without hate. i hate every one of them for how they treated and still treat my partners and how they make#both my partners dread every second of having to be around them or speak to them or do anything with them#im fucking tired of being treated like they fucking made able bodied children WHEN THEY IN FACT DIDNT. SURPRISE ASSHOLE YOU TRAUMATIZED YOUR#KID INTO DISABILITY#now none of us can fucking function in the world were all 3 disabled stupid autistics who can barely not yell at each other or whatever and#i infact dont blame my partners because i know its not the fucking cause its what they were fucking taught and i have no more grace in me to#give to the parents who raised them. there is no grace for them. there is simply you fucking couldve been better. you failed and you have to#fucking live with the fact that you fucking failed as a parent#i fucking hate everything about the parentals genuinely. there are so much of their lives and interests that i do not respect because their#lives apparently came first over their kids. and i dont care anymore i dont care about reasonable “excuses” i dont fucking care when#i reparent their kid without their fucking input or thought or opinion. fuck off#i fucking hate it here#🥩#🐣#🌤️#original#vent
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inside out 2 is interesting but it sure is the exact same plot as inside out 1 down to the emotions getting stranded outside hq as a core aspect of rileys isbeliminated and having to start from scratch while joy loses hope and cries while watching memories in a pile of memories that were deemed unimportant before being deus ex machinad by an imaginary cartoon
#inside out 2 spoilers#except joy has not learned her lesson about all emotions and memories being valuable and that she is not in charge#of making the call of which emotions are important. she builds her team up by emphasizing the good they do for riley#and continues to be an absolute control freak who puts an emphasis on her own importance seeming to have learned very little#some could argue that the emotions arent distinct enough or are even too nebulous to be their own emotions#and according to many theories in the subject all emotions come from combining multiple of the core emotions#which is why having nostalgia show up for a gag was... interesting. considering the first movie literally showed us joy and sadness memorie#create nostalgic ones. otherwise i mostly just feel like theyre too disparate and am still shocked how joy is like. the only positive#emotion. period.#anyway yeah it kinda underminded the first movies thesis that all emotions are important and helpful by making anxiety basically plain bad#even despite her explanations of why shes good. like she drops her memory in the sense of self and it immediately sprouts ominously#like idk maybe im just quibbling over foreshadowing in a childrens movie but to keep in line with that original thesis#wouldnt it make more sense to get more corrupt only as anxiety continues to flood it with only her emotion#like basing your entire sense of self and personality/beliefs around one emotion entirely is extremely unhealthy#and like it starts normal and gets more erratic as anxiety becomes the ONLY contributing factor. its probably not that important#okay so joy learns her lesson about the memories. but its still like. girl did you not already basically learn this before
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I think (as much as I annoyingly complain and whine about not having a partner) being single this long has been good for me. I'm learning a lot about myself and I'm learning why I was a shit person, and through finding the root of the problem I can kind of... start to heal. I can be nicer to myself so I can grow and get better. Because TBH.. being mean and cruel to yourself doesn't make you become a better person. It just makes you believe that thats what you /are,/ and thats what you /always will be,/ as opposed to realizing that you are a product of your circumstances but that does not mean you can't get better and become a better person. Accepting help and trying to get better so you can eventually love yourself – even if no one else does – is the greatest and loveliest thing you can do for yourself. You deserve that love, you exist and you live and you feel and that is a truly beautiful gift.
#uhm well anyway I hope everyone finds people and a place where they feel safe and loved#I'm feeling really emotional sorryy#basically. tldr; found the problem! trying to get better now through loving myself instead of hating myself#its been really hard. its going to be really hard. I feel like ive barely made any progress#I wish I had a therapist to talk about this stuff with. but I dont.#btw the uh root problem: finding out my mother was actually hugely abusive & I already knew my dad was#so basically ive been having to confront the fact that Ive been living a lie and my mother is actually deeply terrible as much as my dad#and my parents should have never had children & ive never had one single decent adult in my life#so basically uhm yea lol. I was born into dysfunction. I was never going to turn oit normal or okay.#so its been hard to like. figure all that out alone. learning I have ptsd and extreme ocd + dissociation because of them hasnt been easy#its made me so deeply miserable because I guess I assumed what my mom was doing to us was normal this whole time?#because I thought no. surely not. surely i cant have TWO terrible parents. I need at least 1 good one right?#but yea no actually every adult has hurt me in some way. and I was never going to turn out alright because#I am the king of obsessing and cycling over everything in my life#Im like. not okay right now but not being im in danger just because I wish I had someone to talk to about all this.#I just need to learn to drive so I can get out of here. I need to get out like#all these realizations have been really really heavy on me and ive been having trouble sleeping#Its been hard to process and I dont really know where to go from here. I guess I cant properly heal and grow until I move out?#idk this has been really long im so sorry.#vent#tw vent#tws ->#abuse ment#parents ment#<- in tags
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"We've invested a great deal into your career." SOBBING
#made the mistake of rereading the comics again#how can she say no ?? especially when its put like that#“we saved you”#“we invested in you”#“you owe us for pulling you out”#( not all of that coming from Jack or mercy but ive always blamed public relations and other offices )#for manipulating her like that#this is her FIRST mission#she had to beg to be let out into the field to go save her home that was under attack (again)#her FIRST mission#god god god im so fuckin emotional over her#also love the jack comments too#always felt like Lena was similar to Cassidy in the way that the commanders “picked” their lot of the bunch#because as a reminder#both Cass and Lena (and angela) were CHILDREN#cass and angela more so since Lena was technically an adult but i dont count 22 as old enough to do all of this#hell im 23 and i barely remember to feed myseld sometimes#( ooc. )#killing time before work and just ranting about my stupid time lesbian
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Understanding the scene of Ted putting the tie on Mike (Mike commenting on how it's too tight and it's choking him and Ted saying that's how it's supposed to be) in a very Mike-Ted parallels way. AND IT WAS ON FRONT OF A MIRROR TOO. Shrimp colors everywhere.
#im so sorry for being this way truly i cannot help it. the vicious cycles get me. im seeing the light#bc personally i dont see it as simply about heteronormativity. i mean its a part of it#but its framed as like. ted is choking mike with heterosexuality! and while that is true to an extent they have ted say thats how its#supposed TO BE for a reason! clothing is something ppl put on themselves. putting on your tie too tight- choking yourself its not just#sexuality its about control. controlling your image. controlling yourself#the religious themes of s4 wasnt just a recent feature. the idea of repression (emotional/sexual/physical) goes all the way back to s1#the concept of keeping such a tight control over yourself (ie 'choking' yourself and enforcing it on your children) falls in line with#religious trauma. constantly being watched not only by authority but god. repressing/choking yourself so you dont step out of line#and again its on front of the mirror. like idk mike-ted parallels arent popular in this fandom but take it up with the duffers#i didnt put them in there they did!!!#like the idea of being so repressed and being in a constant state of controlling oneself to toe the line not only falls in line with a lack#of pov (which they intentionally take away from mike and intentionally never give to ted)#but also mikes possible ED which again is about control! these are all metaphors for controlling oneself to a harmful extent!#one day ppl will appreciate mike ted parallels beyond 'ted hates mike for being gay' but alas today is not that day and it wont stop me#also 'try new things' being about coming out of your comfort zone! mike trying the pinapple pizza and ted going on the ferris wheel#not tightly controlling yourself to the point you make yourself miserable#blasts runs in the family drowning out literally everything else#its all religious trauma? always have been
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Me last weekend: I'm watching bnha just to feel something
Me right now: 😭😭😭😭😭😭
#im feeling it now Mr. Krabs#im feeling a lot of emotions and theyre all over the place#can i just hold my children?#i forgot how emo it got#i keep blaming the boring beginning of season 5 but im right#its a turn off#but season 6?#season 6 is where its at#season 6 said hey i got you and it went and ripped my heart out my chest#just so i could feel things#ice knows
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When I say I don't really like being around kids, it's because it comes from the same place of being around others, whether my age or older and just wanting to be alone due to getting overwhelmed easily. When some others say they don't like being around kids, they use it as a way to excuse their degradation towards little humans and attempt to strip them of basic human rights under the guise of "But animals are less annoying, so they should just be allowed to replace kids wherever." We are not the same.
#“but they're so rude & annoying on airplanes-” i mean so are u but i have enough sense to tune u out. how about u do the same maybe? instead#of throwing a tantrum over the fact that a child is simply having a day for whatever reason be it being overwhelmed#or possibly in pain. it's normal for humans to have intense emotions but the difference is that children are learning how to control it#what isn't normal no matter what anyone tries to tell you is grown adults shaming and degrading children for not accommodating to their#standards. yeah sometimes kids can be annoying but they have an excuse and our actively learning how to fix their manners.#what's your excuse at your big age? 🤨#“i just think animals-” that's your personal preference something in which someone else would disagree with which u would think would be#okay bc these people are argue for the freedom of choice when it comes to hating on kids but let them be told#that their pet is making someone frustrated then they start coming up with excuses like “just ignore them”#sound familiar?#and while i like spending more time with animals just in general im not going to use that as an excuse to dehumanize a literal child#children are some of the most vulnerable people within society bc they are still learning & growing & need to be protected#wanting to strip away the rights of this particular group should not put people at ease#especially bc the next group these so called “i just prefer animals over children” (derogatory) people will turn on & actively are already#is another disfortunate group of people#why do you think there are so many people who only provide hand outs and ways to care for pets belonging to#unhoused individuals but when you ask if they are going to extend the same courtesy to the owner they are quick to dehumanize them with#“or they just can't be helped!” or “they'll just use the money i give them to buy drugs”#you aren't slick!#rant#random post
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#gwtting into an argument w my.mother abt wheyher its ok to hit children or not is so fucking .#youre rlly going to stand there and act like hitting ur kids is Okay . knowing how i turned out#like . she rlly went 'i know ppl who were abused and they turned out okay !!!!' but fid tbeu tho#did they . or do they appear put tgth and luke theyre not effected.#anyway insanity. wverything i asked her. her answers contradicted her stance#or basically gave me the impression she doesnt see children as anythung but extensions of adults until tbeyre a ceetain age#or smth like that . idk i just cant ubderstand that#theyre mini adults. theyre tiny people. they have no real.conceot of how this world works lmao#why does a child deserve tl be smacked bc tbey dont understand somethibg and theyre having Emotions they dont entirely grasp either#like . a child doesbt need to be hit to be punished lmao#yes some people are just Born Fucked Up and theres no . real way to fix them or etv the fucm she said.#but not rgen they deserve to be smacked lmao . theyre still CHILDREN and as far as im concerned#theres no such thibg as too late at that age. sorry but that may be naive but. those are Children.#u wanna tell me u dont tjink u can skmewhat iron out awful demoralising trsits in children by the time theyre . 20. like .#anyway . thjs shit w my mother + the stuff going on w my cousins#dawg i wanna be someone in the law system#the irony kf me sayinf tbat whe i pretended i didbt see my jury duty letter (i Hate Mail. I cannot stand the idea kf physically sending#a letter. i Hate the post office!!!!!!)#anyway . gotta be rich enough to work part time (10-15hrs a week) and study#while also keepibg a socisl life. woo.#i rlly refuse to go to uni until i have a savings acc of $10ktbh or#a partner willibg to support me w half an income bc i will neve rbe fully financially responsible on someone else#and i know i never will be i value my indeoendency too mych to allow someone That much control over me lmao#like i will nrver not have ny own siurce of income. i refuse 💜
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YOU STILL LIKE IT THOUGH
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GENRE: Fluff, crack fic ish?
PAIRING: Choi su-bong/thanos x preg!fem!reader
FEAT: Nam gyu as the supportive bestie (that he never rlly was)
A/N: this fic i based of a request from anon !! Tbh i changed ALOT of the request (haha- sorry 😞) because I felt like it was a little repetitive and idk i just can't write rlly emotional scenes with Thanos for some reason (??) ALSO I feel like there are parts where Thanos seems ooc? Idk.. i wrote this instead of studying in the span of 30 mins
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"Whoo!" You hear Thanos shout on the top of his voice while he high fives nam gyu as they both jump up and down as if they were children in elementary school after winning a play ground game
You manage your groan, suppressing it while you stare at them from afar, of course that crazy fucker managed to pass through the first game.
You hated to admit it, but a part of you was relieved,
You always had a thing for psycho guys, and your ex boyfriend? The one with the brightly dyed hair who was now doing some weird dance seemed to proudly embody every part of that sentiment.
You carefully watch from afar, not wanting to catch his eyes, your hand unknowingly lay over your stomach while you move uncomfortably in the bunk bed
Fuck, your feeling dizzy all over again
You hear a thud against your bed post, you look up slowly, your eyes slightly squinting to see the purple haired boy with a usual frown on his face
"Hey" his eyebrows raise "are you okay"
"I thought I told you to get lost earlier"
Your mood swings weren't really helping either
"Geez woman" thanos tchs but sits beside you in your bed anyways "im just trying to help" grumbling under his breath but the cautious expression in his face saied otherwise
"I came here to brag about how amazing i usually am but seeing you like this is just killing the vibe yknow"
he makes a hand gesture in the air, leaning face closer in an attempt to make you smile which does not go wasted as the smile you tried to supress escaped your face
"Fuck off you loser" your still kneeling, your hands over your knees and your face hiding behind your knees but he hears the smile in your voice anyways.
He wouldn't want to admit it, but he was relieved
He always had a thing for girls with pretty voices and you? The girl right next to him had to have one of the prettiest voices he had ever heard. Ofcourse who would better know than a rapper like himself?
"I thought I told you to stick close to me, instead you leech to that crazy old man" thanos says as he points towards gi hun who sat far away in the opposite side
You immediately slap his hand, causing him to wince while retracing it back, rubbing it softly
"How many times will I tell you! You shouldn't point your hands at strangers especially to people who are older" you scold him rather loudly causing him to wince even more
"Agh" thanos ruffles his neon hair while complaining "why don't you shout louder so that everyone will hear and laugh at me?"
You resist the urge to roll your eyes upon his childish manners, he really didn't change
Thanos suddenly bangs the top of the bunk with a loud sound, taking you by shock
"Oi" his voice loud and almost threatening "nam gyu" calling out the man above the bed
Immediately your taken by shock once more when a man's head pops upside down, with black oily hair falling all over his face from above the bed
"Yes Thanos?" Nam gyu quickly inquired while sparing you a quick glance which didn't go unnoticed by the scowling man next to you
"Did you hear her telling me off?" He points at nam gyu before quickly adding "careful, there's only one correct answer"
Nam gyu pauses and thinks which seems to be the wrong thing to do as it just annoys Thanos
"Whats wrong with you, tell me quickly!"
"N-no! Not at all! Infact nobody heard anything!" Nam gyu quickly says, obviously lying but this seemed to please Thanos who now held a haughty face
Wow, this is was supposedly the father of your unborn child. Shame you and your taste in weird guys
Before Thanos could open his mouth to say something, a group of pink guards enter the room with large containers
Straight away you freeze up, shrinking behind the bed while your heart hammered, fear spread across your face
Noticing your expression on your face, instinctively Thanos covers you with his back, shielding you with his arms which covered your sides while his expression, though you could not see was filled with wariness
The pink guards open the large containers they were carrying as everyone watched quietly, scared as they were unsure of what to expect, you included
The pink guard with the white circle lifts up a piece of bread and milk "lunch time" announcing in the same robotic voice like all the other guards
A sigh of relief escapes your mouth as your shoulders relax, unlike you Thanos still shields you, covering your face with his back
You hit him with a thud on the back of his head
"What the hell man" thanos turns around, his eyes glaring at you
"Stop trying to act like a hero you shameless prick" you frown even though his actions did leave you with a warm feeling in your heart
"Your acting so protective after all the stunt you pulled before we broke up" you continue "seeing you act all so protective is just pissing me off even more"
Thanos throws his head back, groaning "give me a break woman. You know I was going through a hard time"
"Bullshit" your fold your arms, as if it was act to protect yourself, and the unborn baby in your stomach.
The poor thing was only 2 months old
The both of you hear nam gyu cough from above the bed, forgetting that he was there in the first place
Again Thanos bangs the top of the bunk, causing you to give him a look
"Stop doing that" you scold him
"doing what?" Thanos raises his eyebrow before banging the top of the bunk again while sticking his tongue at you
Nam gyu pops back down again, upside down, the sight would have been hilarious only if you weren't experiencing the pain in your stomach and the sight of the man sitting beside you
"Go get lunch for me and my girl" thanos tilts his head towards you while avoiding your eyecontact while you tell yourself not to think about the fact that he still referred to you as 'his girl'
"go fast what are you still doing here" thanks reprimanded nam gyu
Nam gyu awkwardly stood unsure of what to say "but it's just one bread and one milk per person"
"Then give her yours" thanos said simply "and go steal someone's lunch for me"
"Then what about for me?" Nam gyu asked dumbfounded which caused Thanos to pause and think for a while
"That's not my fucking problem man- now go" he pushes him away, leaving you with a heavy sigh
"I don't want to eat"
"Don't talk bullshit" thanos eyes you "you think i'm gonna let you starve? I never did, and i wont be starting now"
Again with the whole protective boyfriend act, fuck, why did it make your heart race a little?
"Your still such an asshole, you didnt change a bit" you huffed as you leaned behind, resting your back against the wall
"Well you changed" thanos says which quirks your curiosity
"How so?'
"I don't know" he shrugs "something is different. Something happened, i can't exactly ppint my fi ger at it though"
Your eyes dart away from his while your breathing started to fasten slightly
"Oh yea? How so?" You ask, your voice slightly higher than it was which Thanos picks up immediately
"Ohoho" he grins "did I get it right? Did you get something done?" He glances you up and down which leads you to hitting him
"Ow- i was just joking, you still take everything so seriously" he grumbled holding your hand from hitting him "I wish that part had changed'
Your other hand comes swinging which he again grabs softly
"jokingg" he says in a sing song voice before letting both your arms go leaving you with a scowl and him with a satisfied smirk in his face
"Asshole" you mutter which stretches his smirk even more
"You still like it though"
You almost swear you heard a hint of vulnerability in his tone, prompting you to glance at him quickly just to catch him already looking at you
"So? Aren't you gonna ask me what has changed?" You ask slowly, in your head trying to process whether your doing the right thing or not,
You first found out you were pregnant with your baby right after you and Thanos broke up.
The following days, whenever you went to pay him a visit, he was always missing, causing you to believe maybe it was better for him not to know. And then you suddenly meet him for the first time after your breakup during the squid games
The timing was almost comical
"Why?" Thanos continued still with an amused face "you still seem the same on the inside"
Your hand immediately goes to your stomach, slowly tracing along it from above the green track jacket which everyone wore
"Don't tell me your sick or something" thanos asks with his voice slightly raised as he notices your action "fuck are you?"
His eyes slightly widens as he frowns "hey" he snaps his finger upon your zoning out "are you sick?"
"Hm?" You ask confused
"What the fuck" he swears under his breath with a anxious expression on his face while his hand runs through his finger "is that why your here? To win some money for your treatment?"
"Su Bong its not like that-" All your attempts of correcting him seemed to be futile as he sweared loudly, getting out of the bed
"Shit shit shit!" He grabs his head while he paced around the floor, a sight you had seen a few times over the span of your relationship
"ofcourse that's why your here, you would only be here for a sensible reason"
"Oh, su bong" you attempt to appeal to him, reaching your hand out, pulling his closer towards you while he hands were still over his head, eyes lowered
"Fuck baby I'm so sorry" he breathed out "shit i never should have left, i thought" he paused "I thought I'd win some money and get you back, give you the life you really deserve but"
You watch his dazed expression while he rambled, you bit you underlip, hesitant of whether to tell him the truth still
"Fuck, i didn't even know that, i didn't even know you were sick-"
Before he could continue again you grab his face , forcing him to look at your face
"I'm not sick, that's not why im here"
Thanos breathed heavily, everything felt so real suddenly, he felt his cross necklace strapped around his neck, his fingers itching to pop a pill in his mouth to sooth his nerves
"I'm not sick" you shake your head as you lean your forehead against his "su-bong"
You can still feel his strained breaths and darting eyes
"I'm pregnant"
And it all stopped,
You held your breath, afraid of what would happen if you let go, your could heart your heartbeat from your ears, feel the realisation setting inside thanos,
You were scared. Scared of how he would react
He breaks away first, slowly and gently. Staring at you with no expression in his face,
"And it's yours" you rapidly feel the need to add, taken back by his silence which didn't not suit him "and i know having a kid was never in your plan, and i know things are over between us but-"
Your body is wrapped by his arms and his face nestles in your neck, pulling your deeper in his embrace
"Holy shit" thanos whispers in your ear, you can hear the giddiness radiating off his voice "im a dad"
"Yea you are" you laugh a little as you say "your a dad"
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I never got the chance to"
Thanos furrows his eyebrows but doesn't press any more "will you let me be our baby's dad?" He ask
"You know I grew up without a dad, this kid doesn't deserve that" he pokes your stomach with a soft grin which looked slightly odd against his eccentric features "I wanna be in this kids life"
You nodd softly, hearing his words
"And yours too" thanos looks up to you, grinning while he winked at you "senorita"
"You corny bastard" you laugh shaking your head
"You still like it though"
You nodd your head, with tenderness in your eyes and voice
"I do"
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊ extra scene pack !!
"Thanos!" Nam gyu came running with 3 pieces of sweet bread and 3 packets of milk "I got it! Do you know how much trouble i went to get all these-"
"Give it here " thanos grabbed all the bread and milk away "why did you take so long anyways"
Nam gyu held his hands as he pouted "I mean- i had to fight like 2 guys for bread and milk for us-"
Thanos brushed him off as he opened all the packets of bread and poked in the straw of all the milk packets
"Uhm thanos" nam gyu apprehensively called out "What are you doing?"
Thanos hands you all the bread and urges you to eat while he holds the packets of milk in his hand, ready to feed you
Thanos gestures towards you who was sitting in the bed, now wrapped in not only your jacket but his aswell "can't you see the lady is pregnant"
Nam gyu scratched his head "pregnant? With who?"
Thanos shakes his head, exaggerating his actions "dumb ass, she's pregnant with my baby ofcourse" he announced like it was the most obvious thing in the world
"Holy shit!" Nam gyu gaped his hand covering his mouth as he stares at you while you sheepishly smile at him
Thanos let out a small laugh which then slowly grew louder
"What? Why are you surprised? Ofcourse i succeeded in my first try- fuck" he kneels down in pain after being striked by you in the stomach
Nam gyu pulls a face in behalf of Thanos as he pats his back sympathetically while he whispers to you
"Don't worry. I know it probably wasnt his first try or anything- ow" nam gyu kneels on the ground after being hit in the stomach by thanos
₊˚。⋆❆⋆。˚₊
"What... what are you guys doing?" You question as you approach Thanos and nam gyu who were huddled up in a corner, in a long rather quiet conversation which seemed like an unusual activity for both of them to part take in
Both in the 'discussion' and 'quiet' part
Thanos loops his arm around your with a proud smirk on his face while urging nam gyu to announce what they were discussing
Nam gyu nodds eagerly as gets up in his two feet quickly, standing straight and tall with a loud and confident voice "we have decided the perfect name for the baby !!"
You see thanos's broad smile and nam gyu's confident voice, uneasiness settling in your stomach for whatever name they picked out
"These is the name that Thanos and i have personally given a lot of thought for and chosen after much contemplation !!"
Thanos nodded his head with a content expression while he winked at you, assuring that you'll like it
"Ahem" nam gyu clears his throat "before I announce the name that we have chosen, i would like to give recognition to the name we almost chose aswell !!"
Thanos immediately began clapping his hand loudly "waaah, I never knew you could speak so well "
This comment made nam gyu's chest fill swell with pride as he puffs out his chest a little
"I shall now, announce the first runners up, the name that almost was given to the new born baby"
nam gyu pauses which prompts Thanos to make the sound of drum rolls
"Nebula" nam gyu announces as he and thanos clap loudly.
Seeing your still figure both men urge you to claps aswell
"Nebula?" You mutter under your breath "where have i heard that name before?"
"And now, the name that has been selected over numerous selection test and discussion, the name of the baby is" nam gyu points at your stomach
"Gamora"
Thanos whoops loudly, both nam gyu and him clapping their hands in the air while you stand off handedly as it hits you
"Your naming our child after the daughter of the purple alien monster from a superhero movie?!"
#thanos squid game#squid game fanfic#squid game 2#squid game#squid game season 2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#thanos x reader#choi su bong x reader#choi su bong#su bong x reader#t.o.p x reader#t.o.p#t.o.p bigbang#thanos#nam gyu#squid game nam gyu#squid game thanos#squid game thanos x reader
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Tbf canon did forcibly remove Norman and Emma from the trio for roughly two years </3 Not to detract from the point you're making though.
Also feel like @thedoodlenoodlesuniverse's trio dynamics graph is still fairly accurate (original deleted, reblog here)
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Eternally grateful I've never come across jealous/spiteful Norman and Ray fighting over Emma, or jealous/spiteful Emma and Ray fighting over Norman.
(although I do subscribe to the headcanon of Norman having a pang of jealousy over how much time RE got to spend together before their reunion in the Paradise Hideout with how he tends to navigate extremes at that age, but it’s of a very specific variety. Seeing how close the Grace Field escapees have become during their near two years out in demon world and how that shared trauma brought them together could be a mixed bag for him, with the aching reminder that he wasn’t there with them, didn’t share those memories with them after a lifetime of being together, and the initial flare of jealously turns into shame over thinking it in the first place when 1) he’s mad at not being able to have been there with them‚ not at them, 2) how selfish it is to still want that when they already went through his death once and now will have to go through that a second time, and 3) he spent so long isolated and effectively helpless in his immediate circumstances while at Lambda and suffered for no justifiable reason that it manifests in a festering internal rage, which heartbreakingly can never be given a satisfactory answer…so basically banana_slug_army’s Interwoven lol)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/bb332f93b70edddd3f7668a5d0a65b37/c4f027691ffcb6ce-c0/s540x810/40d7313625c061b666150da5960fd2b90a6ea539.webp)
full score trio 😔
#yea…idk it just doesn't feel right with just two of em#like i love trios sm#this also applies to shipping#everytime i see people shipping 2 of em im just like. but what about the 3rd :(#the 3rd one ether need slike. a REALLY good alternative#or ot3 baybeeee#← OT3 is what one does if they are not a coward 🙏😌#/lh but also I've been burned too many times with a few series#semi-canon cishet m/f with pair-the-spares complementary m/f ships are a helluva drug#idk if you wanted this to be a tangent discussion post my bad#TPN Memes#Full Score Trio#Norrayemma#Shipping#thedoodlenoodlesuniverse#ctrl58#TPN Fanfic#banana_slug_army#𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑤𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑛#all the trio ship factions cut the third member out to some degree#but NE is the largest one and thus the most noticeable instance of it with Ray being cut out#I love Ray using the “you've loved her since we were kids” argument in that chart#as if they aren't still 11-13yo children dklsjf#this is also why I think you can argue all relationships are platonic bc like. they really are so young and feelings change over lifetimes#even if I am heavily biased toward my preferred ships in the long run/endgame lol#and with the emotional maturity they display well beyond their young years I get why people fall hard for these dynamics#re: jealousy people can write w/e they're feeling but it just seems so at odds with their characters#and also likely to be written in a cartoony way that I have little interest in#/déjà vu posting
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I want a cat. I want 5 cats. they'll help me actually live by being what I need to take care of so I have to take care of myself
#i just want to be less of an emotional and laborious burden on my family. i hate making them take care of me when i fall off on health#idk im sad and hungry#i still think it could be feasible to maybe turn the bedroom into a better use of space and we'd maybe all be able to sleep in it at once#and the whole other side house can belong to them and our side with us#idk. maybe they'd think it's not responsible enough to stuff our shit in one place but like#idk man i just want away from you people I'm tired of your voices I'm tired of your faces I'm tired of having to be around u worry about u#i dont fucking care i just don't ever want to see them again#idk i just hate how more and more i just get an anxiety response to them and it just gets worse over time#like its to the point now where like i dont even want them to talk to my children unsupervised. you dont get to influence them#like they fucking ruined their first and only attempt at having a kid im not fucking letting you do it again i dont trust you to ever#do any errands for me and my kids alone with them. like theyre not talking to them! sorry! you guys had nothing good to say in any emotional#level and anytime you guys have kids over all you do is make fun of them! so! you dont get to talk to my kids ever!#im genuinely so sad that its come to this but also like its not like theyve even done anything for me. its not like they know me#i dont fucking like them either like#i just want to never have to hear or see them ever again they bring me that much distress#i kind of just want to disappear in general because i feel like these thoughts r cruel so i may as well just kms bc im only gonna get worse
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