#im going to forever cry about this ;-;
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crucefix · 1 year ago
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kendall embracing roman while pushing his cuts against his shoulder to split them open, offering him both comfort and punishment (and for roman they’re the same thing), roman hating ken and being comforted by it at the same time, kendall knowing it’s what roman ‘needs’ and also using it as a means to put roman in his place, making him subservient and small, roman letting out that groan of relief because he can’t deal with internal pain and emotions so he needs it to be translated into physical pain instead. sick
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honeycreammilkshake · 2 months ago
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Yuji can finally have his own Human Earthworm with blobkuna haha
it seems to me that gege is really fond of metaphors and stories within stories, so i took a closer look at the human earthworm series that was given to us in the anime/manga and i found a lot of interesting things that, as usual, i'm going to turn into a sukuita essay. (sorry for the overly long rant coming up, anon ;-;)
the basic plot of the 4th movie is that an ordinary man is transformed into a half-worm, half-human creature by an evil scientist/doctor. the human earthworm manages to escape but is forced to hide from the outside world as he will be perceived as a monster because of his appearance. however, his hiding place also enables him to meet an animal rights activist who ends up falling in love with him. she is a very understanding, compassionate, and empathetic person (remind you of someone?) and although she is scared of him at first, she looks past his "monstrous appearance" to find the true person within, and he is ultimately more human than other humans are.
in the end, though, he is killed by the girl's friends, who only see a monster. before they attack him, though, she tells them that they will be the monsters for killing him.
this theme of the humans being more monstrous than the actual monsters themselves, such as in literature like frankenstein by mary shelley or the metamorphosis by franz kafka, is a theme used to invert and reframe the popular myths and stories of monsters both looking abnormal and being unnatural.
so... what does this mean in relation to sukuna and yuuji's story?
i think it's pretty clear that sukuna was perceived as monstrous from his birth onward. in historical japan, during the heian era, there was a lot of conflict between different religions and very rapid changes in culture and lifestyles as people began breaking away from chinese influences. this era is sometimes called the "golden age of the imperial court" because of the court's growing power and cultural prosperity, and a lot of this power resided with the Fujiwara clan who had intermarried with the imperials. however, for the majority of ordinary people, this era saw a lot of suffering, hardships, low quality of life, and a high infant mortality rate.
sukuna was born into this starving world and would have died had he not eaten his twin in the womb. but he was unwanted and unwelcome from the moment he was born. i've written this before (so i'm sorry if it's getting a bit repetitive) but i think a lot of fans don't realize how much more demanding and cruel life was during this time (compared to modern day japan) in terms of life expectancy and quality. and those factors shaped sukuna into what he is, or at least make up a part of his becoming a monster.
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in sukuna's own words his existence itself is anathema. the literal definition of this is "vehement disliking" and is a synonym of abhorrent. in religious usage it means "exclusion from the society of the faithful because of heresy" and it is described as being "cursed."
sukuna was perceived as being a curse before he even became cursed objects. whether or not he was born with extra limbs and/or lots of cursed energy, he was still seen as something unnatural and inhuman.
in other words, his unusual appearance and origin is monstrous to others. and i think he took this to heart and decided to just go with it, because he refuses to be seen as human by anyone even though he was in fact born one. he would rather be feared and despised as an imaginary demon than treated like a real person who was essentially cast out of the normal world.
but yuuji doesn't treat sukuna like just another monster in the end. instead, he offers him such selfless acceptance and honest empathy. and i don't think sukuna can take something like that.
sukuna is very aware of his own nature. he seems really proud to be an unfeeling, indifferent entity of chaos.
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hm.....
lots of thoughts on this one panel alone. but i'll try to keep my ideas short. i believe that sukuna embraced what others saw as his "cursed nature" and became the strongest so he could be above all the hatred and ignorance that made others perceive him as being a monster. so he matched his actions to what people feared from him.
he became the monster so he could look down on those same people and also so he could isolate himself from ever being affected by those feelings again. after all, those others are nothing more than weak prey who shouldn't lament their own suffering, just like he shouldn't lament being seen as cursed from birth on. just like he claims he isn't lonely because only the most selfish can be on top.
but still. people want to destroy him for just being the role they more than likely forced him into. he never became more than what people saw him as, and yet they still hate him.
he claims to be above that hatred, but i think it might actually get to him. while else would he reflect so much on it during his fight with yuuji. yuuji, who he lived inside of, who he looks down on for being "weak" because he is far too emotional and caring for others, yet that's one of the biggest reasons for yuuji's strength. strength sukuna tries to undervalue because he can't stand the idea that strength can ever be compassionate as well.
yuuji hates sukuna's ideals and his indifference to the value of life. but he still accepts sukuna. he sees past the monstrous appearance and realizes sukuna was made into a monster by chance. what if someone was there for him, like wasuke was there for yuuji? even though wasuke still pushed yuuji away and was all that yuuji had, he still kept yuuji tethered to being a good person and caring for others. wasuke served as both a lesson in what not to become and a reminder for yuuji to realize the importance of life.
sukuna probably didn't have that, or if he was given that chance, it was far too late for him.
yuuji actually wanted to live with sukuna. he wanted to the animal rights activist to sukuna's worm monster, but in the end, sukuna chose death.
the humans killed the monster they made, yet again. sukuna would rather live and die as a curse than be anything different. yuuji loved him even as a worm, but sukuna couldn't take it.
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and yuuji looks so heart-broken and disappointed for it.
also. i didn't notice this until now. but yuuji cradles sukuna's remains so so gently... in the hand that looks monstrous.
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monster to monster. yet yuuji was so tender. he didn't seek to mock sukuna. instead, he said that they were the same. that sukuna is him.
yuuji was created for the purpose of housing sukuna inside of him, for being his vessel. he was made into a "monster" but instead of letting that turn him into something evil, he used his abilities to save other people. and he even wanted sukuna to come back to him!!!
again, i'm sorry for making this into yet another paper-long incoherent rant. i probably should have stuck to my original reply which was "sad we couldn't see their halfling children ;-;" but then this happened instead. thank you for bearing with me if you read through the mess of my thoughts. ty for your wonderful ask anon <3
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kanos · 2 months ago
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“the place where i’m happiest is wherever you are.”
after all this time i was finally able to commission the wonderful @ziorre and got the most breathtaking art of dagan and my oc helia 💕. they’ve been on my mind a lot lately and ziorre really brought helia to life with this, i just can’t thank her enough!!
taglist: @imogenkol @carrionsflower @statichvm @pitchmoss @pavus @tommyarashikage @florbelles @strangefable @anoramactir @jamessunderlandgf @leviiackrman @firstaidspray @thedeadthree @risingsh0t @g0dspeeed @carlosoliveiraa @roberthouse69 @josephzeppeli
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skipblebee · 1 year ago
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And I love you love you love you, no it's not so hard to tell And I love you love you love you, is it obvious to everyone else?
Petrigrof fluff for the soul because I NEED it before the finale
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ratatatastic · 4 months ago
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when we get the forsyekky hug from the side but its only 6 frames...what do you want me to die....is this how we're forced to live with our lives... with 6 measly frames...
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skunkes · 1 month ago
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the bad: i have been raised without much warmth from my parents in childhood, but also pressured to conform to familial authority, doubt myself always, and value familial connections above all else (<- failed at this, and feel guilt about it.)
but also in experiencing this i have been so isolated from the entire rest of the world and others, that it will be nearly impossible to create my own "family" -> find safety and comfort in anybody else once my family is Gone. despite dis i find it really difficult to break away from the familiar, disobey and disappoint, because, well, why are my wishes more important than anybody else's. why would I cause upset and distress in anybody, and exert so much effort into my doubt filled half decisions, for my meaningless little Wishes. being away would also mean less time with these people who I'll never see again once they're gone. being raised this way is definitely paying off for those who did so.
the good: yaaaay adjacent inspiration for writing talon lore
#talkys#my dad scaring me but also giving me no advice on what to do instead only saying if i do this it will be the wrong choice leading#to more wrong choices well yep you got me i am scared. i am inept. i fear regret and punishment for wrong decisions.#i struggle to make decisions because i cant go back on them.#''ill never have savings again'' and ''you cant value friends over family they'll abandon you''#and ''living here is only a problem for you because you dont communicate. there is a way to work things out''#i wish i could work it out and stay i dont know why i cant work it out ! and what do i want#to leave so badly for... to continue to never have stable housing#never have savings again? be alone and in danger?#to be able to wear whatever i want and...buy things? really? that doesnt seem very worth it#nothing seems very worth it#im miserable here but maybe i'd be more miserable away...it is true#well at least the chances to leave are very slim. and will continue to get slimmer the more time passes.#but maybe its fine i dont want to ruin my life or be even more of a burden or reason for distress in someone else's#moving out wouldnt fix anything. wherever you go there you are.#my friend said i have to be a little selfish (positive) to push myself to leave. bt i dont want to be selfish. im ashamed of that as a trai#delete later#even now i feel immense guilt and stress when my dad does things that hurt or bother me bc i know ill miss him when he's gone.#(and ill have nobody after all of that. due to the being kept in a cage)#that sucks. why does everyone else always win. why am i always the weakest pliable one. i wish i had no emotions#my surgery is the only decision in my life ive been 100% sure on for years#and even then my parent's words had me crying and rapidly changing emotions daily until the day came#im not strong enough or sure enough about anything else to withstand More of that#<- and i know that tomorrow im gonna be like actually you know what who cares lets try to leave#and the next day ill be resigned to staying here forever#and the next day ill be like actually you know what who cares l
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demigod-of-the-agni · 9 months ago
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FF7 REBIRTH SPOILERS ft A THEORY OF MINE
"Emptiness"
I may be reading too deep into this but bear with me. Sephiroth doing his damned best to reinforce that Cloud is nothing, that everything he feels his fake, that he's a puppet pulled along by Sephiroth's strings with no real purpose of his own. "Your tears are empty" is a line that really stands out to me, because Sephiroth insinuates that Cloud isn't a person and has no true substance as an individual. He's a shell.
Then much later, in the dream-esque Sleeping Forest, Aerith wants to spend one of their final moments focusing on Cloud, focusing on "finding the real [him]". Then Cloud hands Holy to Aerith, and she gifts him the clear materia in return, presumably having taken up Holy before she leaves. Aerith theorised earlier in the game that Holy was probably powered by her memories and dreams, and having lost them to the Whispers, to fate, has rendered the materia useless.
Basically, Cloud aptly describes not-Holy with, "It looks empty".
An empty man holding onto an empty materia.
I don't know, man. The thing about being given an empty thing after being told and tortured with the idea that you yourself are an empty thing is getting to me.
Part 3 is most likely going to deal with the fallout of Cloud's broken psyche and piecing him back together to "find the real [him]". I'm theorising not-Holy is only restored once Cloud has finally figured out who he is and what he wants to do.
Because materia isn't just the crystallisation of mako and the Lifestream. It's the physical representation of hopes and dreams and desires. The Black Materia was created to deliver the Gi from their unending existence. The White Materia ensures the prayers of the planet are answered.
And now not-Holy belongs to Cloud, so that whatever he finds in himself will fuel not-Holy and provide it with new purpose, maybe even allow him to finally heal after over two decades of suffering, because as Aerith said, "it's about saving the world — and you"
That is all
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satorisoup · 4 months ago
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
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tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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girlthativealwaysbeen · 30 days ago
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mann im going to get my blood reports tomorrow and im lwk scared
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kindheartedgummybears · 11 months ago
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"Anthony canon soul survivor" this, "What if Megan was soul survivor" that.
Okay but just imagine, James and Anne survivors. Just imagine.
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potatobugz · 1 year ago
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come here son i am going to infect you with my inosuke + kanao sibling agenda
(do not tag as ship)
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science-lings · 7 months ago
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do you guys ever think about the fact that Phoenix was the same age as Mia was when she died when he was disbarred? That he said goodbye to her for the last time, thinking that he was finally living up to her legacy only to months later lose it all? Would he think she would be disappointed in him for falling into the same flavor of trap that she did? Do you think he sat in her office under the window without a badge as something within him died in just the same place as she did?
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theadventurek9 · 1 year ago
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"She is probably eligible for Finals in Texas" is something I clearly remember my friend saying as Aayla got her Novice title in ASCA this past April. It wasn't even something I knew about or was on my Radar. I just wanted to hurry through novice and open to start working on her UD like I was for AKC.
Due to a barky run, she had one 193, it was suggested that I replace it for a higher score. Then I got offered a ride to nationals and was told I could stay for cheap in a stall in the obedience area. The spark there started thinking I could make this happen and we could go.
I entered in novice B for a fourth time in May to get a 196 and secure Aayla's spot in Novice Finals. When the standings came out, Aayla was dog #4 in novice with a 199, 196.5 and 196. The dogs ahead of her were in the 196-200 score range. Two dogs were scoring similar to her as well. So I was excited to go and hoped to place in the middle of the 10 dogs that were attending.
Except for a weird judge issue that caused an NQ for the first pre trial, the second pre trial went well and Aayla got her highest score in utility to date with a 195. Her heeling was doing great and I was really looking forward to finals.
For finals you do two full runs under two different judges and combine the score. NQs on an exercise are just points loss not NQed from placing. So we did our two group stays first then started our individual exercises.
Aayla got a 195 on her first run. She two slow sits that lost us our 5 points. I somewhat watched the other runs, thinking we did well in the group of people. After everyone finished my friend ran up and told me that Aayla was in the lead by several points. Even if everyone else got a perfect score, Aayla would only need to get a 196 on the next run to win overall.
For the next run Aayla only had one slow sit, but had an auto finish on the recall. She got a 194. A few of those dogs had a history of getting 199-200 scores in novice before so I held my breath.
My friend (the obedience chair, who can't wait for any surprises) came up, grabbed me and said we got it.
Aayla was the Novice Finals Champion.
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drumlincountry · 4 months ago
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Sometimes caring So Much feels like a curse in this cruel world. but sometimes it allows me to connect with other people who also care A Lot and together we actually are able to make a difference. And that is literally the best feeling in the entire world.
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the-eclectic-wonderer · 27 days ago
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Every time I rewatch S1E2 Guess Who's Coming To The Wedding?, Dorothy's behaviour hits me harder. Not just how she acts around Stan (that final speech, oh my god Bea Arthur you magnificent actress), but how she acts around Kate and the whole premise. She's so excited about the wedding!! She's always wanted to give Kate a great wedding!! She says "Your wedding day should be the most beautiful day of your life" and you know she's been dreaming about her baby's wedding day ever since her own. You know she's desperately trying not to think of how anxious she felt, how trapped, how terrified, how chocked she was when she herself walked down the aisle. She says "And I just hope that you and Kate have all the happiness in the world!" and you can just see the memories of those 38 years of her life shoot through her mind, you can see her hold on to all the happy moments she can and pray that Kate's marriage is nothing but good years and happy Christmases. And the way her voice chokes up when she says goodbye to Kate?? "Now, listen, you be a good wife, you hear? Be his friend, be his lover. Don't be his slave!" Do you think these are the things she told herself during her marriage? Do you think these are the things people told her and she desperately tried to be all that -- to be the perfect friend, to be the perfect lover, so her marriage would work? Do you think that don't be his slave! was a desperate plea -- don't accept it all, don't stay no matter what he does, don't be like me? Listen this is just a rant and I am going nowhere with this but the truth is Dorothy is the strongest woman who ever lived on television and I love her so much and I want to bundle her up in a nice blanket and go beat up Stanley Zbornak with a baseball bat!!!! God!!!!!!
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clits-and-clips · 7 months ago
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Since writing the affirmations and starting manifestation again, I've actually been in a much better headspace. It's crazy how things align, and you end up where you need to be, especially through pain
#txt#have been reading the affirmations every day twice a day sometimes#doing my intentions and manifesting what i wsnt#which is mainly independence#also a good relationship with my ex from here#mainly stuff for me tho#and the full moon on Wednesday which is in scorpio which is his sun sign#will be a big release and maybe i can let go a bit or a lot lol#i need to move on and focus on myself and what i want in life and doing it all on my own#with support obviously but ive never been fully independent and im so ready for the blessings and the open doors#i dont know if ill truly ever be over him but i have to try for my own sanity at this point#i dont want to manifest anything selfish like him coming back to me because it probably wont happen anyway lmao#i hope i dont sound crazy lmao but coming back into my spiritual journey is definitely what i need#connecting with myself and my purpose feels like the only thing i can do rn#have a driving lesson tomorrow but in all honesty i could just go do the test and pass cause ive been driving forever and im good at it#just need to practice certain things but im nearly there! so close i can feel it and see it#anyway i hope i can keep this energy up and continue to head in a positive direction because it feels really good#if i need to cry about him and the loss then i will but im not going to dwell on it too much#i just need to take it as a lesson and let it go :)#cause at the end of the day i really did lead myself here whether it was his choice to end it or not#blah
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