#im going insane but aren't we all
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p4nishers · 1 year ago
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why aren't we talking about crowley not letting aziraphale fall?? WHY TF AREN'T WE TALKING ABOUT THAT??!!!
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arolesbianism · 1 month ago
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I wish So Bad that I could confidently recommend lob corp and library of ruina to people because they're both genuinely rly good games and I also need ppl I know to understand the insanity that is project moon but like godddd they are a fucking Investment. Both in time and in brainpower. I generally think ppl exaggerate how hard lob corp is but it's certainly not easy and when it does get hard it gets HARD. Also it literally requires at least one day 1 reset (basically a new game+) to fully beat the game and at this point I've done at least 10. And for lor I'm not nearly as far in and I'm just scratching the surface of the real game but it's a beast of its own. Also 100+ hours and also hard as hell. Like this game does not fuck around with its difficulty spikes it will make you use your brain and it will give you a damn headache in the process. It's also one of my favorite card combat games I've ever played with mechanics that just so beautifully complement each other to create a dynamic and interesting battle system that gives it a completely different vibe and feeling than any other deck builder games I've played to the point where it almost feels wrong to me to categorize them together. But also I am not even slightly joking abt the headache thing every time I play this damn game I close it with a horrible headache and have to take a multi day break. I think everyone should experience this with me <3
#rat rambles#for the record I have not played limbus company nor do I plan to but the cast is rly good and I know a lot of ppl vouch for it#let it be known if I ever do get around to reading limbus stuff I will become obsessed with outis shes so me bait#youre telling me shes a middle aged woman a war criminal and a bootlicker? sign me the fuck up#I <3 crusty dusty women who suck ass#also ofc don is also the beloved but thats a given#the real question would be which of the other limbus women would comsume my life#because theyre all contenders for characters that could make me go insane. for better or for worse.#also reason number 500 that everyone I know should play these games is that its sooooo fun to make project moon ocs#ofc I and I imagine most ppl mostly make nugget ocs (aka your employees and combat units in the first two games)#but like its just fun to make ocs in this world in general#the worldbuilding of this game is like 90% built on 'would that be fucked up or what?' and I adore it for that#theyll just be like yeah theres a whole faction that follows these things called prescripts which can range from super simple stuff to#literally impossible stuff and if you aren't able to follow them you will be killed and theres a guy whos job it is to hand them out and he#has to routinely inform people to their face that they have to destroy their lives or die and it eventually breaks him#and you go ok cool Im still not over the teleporting trains that dont actually instantly teleport but instead travel through pocket#dimensions over the course of thousands of years during which the passengers can be injured and mangled and feel pain but not die and it's#not uncommon for whole societies to be formed in them but once they arrive to their destination the state of all the passengers is#perfectly reverted back to their state uppon entering leading to them being none the wiser of anything that had previously happened to them#and they go yeah haha we liked love town too anyways wanna watch this robot have another mental breakdown#and you go fuck yeah and get your ass handed to you
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badgirlcoven-official · 3 months ago
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"Willow is a bad character because she's a mary sue" me when I missed the entire point of the show
#scrolling her tag and going insane#side note there is apparent a toh cr1t tag#I will not look at it for annoying takes to make fun off (affirmations)#at least i won't tonight who knows what the future holds#anyway im obsessed bc they were like#'imagine if willow was just a fan character in fanfics you'd all think she was pretty cringe huh'#NUHUH IM NORMAL UR WATCHING THE CRINGE CULTURE TOWARDS HARMLESS THINGS IS STUPID SHOW#also jesus fucking christ do you honestly think that a disabled coded woman of color being a badass is somehow overdone#like the reason ppl criticized MS's in the first place is bc we rlly do not need another white abled girlypop to be the super magical#chosen one and never be in the wrong ever#disabled ppl and woc don't GET that fantasy#also her powers aren't disproportionate to the universe at all#yes she gained a lot of power in two months but she's spent the past several years repressing her very potent magic to mold herself to#other ppls expectations the whole fucking thing is a metaphor for how disabled ppl who now have accomodations/can live their life on their#own terms do much better much faster than people give them credit for#and once again she's really powerful yes but she was for example nothing compared to Darius#she doesn't take on a coven head (though a battle between her and Terra would have been super interesting) and win and she can take care of#1-2 coven scouts on her own but needs support and help from others#if there are more of them#ALSO EVERYONE ELSE GETS MORE POWERFUL ALSO#why isn't Amity a mary sue for going from only making small abominations and needing a training wand to being like the 3rd strongest#abomination magic user? bc shes white?#their main complaint seemed to be that willow demasculated hunter tho#so like#lmao cope. seethe.
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okitanoniisan · 6 months ago
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im at the point in my rgg hyperfixation where shit i say about kiryu is like. nigh unintelligible unless you can piece together my scattered riddles and/or have access to the inside of my brain
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luxrayz64 · 6 months ago
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i need to be put down someone needs to just erase the concept of the legend of zelda from my brain forever because totk and the team behind it is not gonna stop pissing me off ever. for fucks sake aonuma limitations are not a bad thing and players often cannot be trusted with player freedom. if you want me to come up with a creative solution to a puzzle you need to put limitations on it.
the most well regarded parts of breath of the wild - the great plateau, eventide island - are well regarded because of the limitations they put on the player. you cannot have meaningful progression in a game without limitations.
people crave efficiency, and without limitations in place, players will take the path of least resistance. they won't engage with the possibilities of the ultrahand mechanic in order to take that korok from point a to point b - they'll make the hoverbike, or just pick the fucker up and walk it there. players have to limit themselves in order to reach the games full potential, and idk about you guys but im not fucking doing that.
which is why when aonuma says that he thinks the only reason people prefer the formula of the older zelda games is nostalgia, it makes me want to goddamn hit things. I dont want to create my own fun! that is your job! I never minded the linearity of the older games, because it challenged me - to solve that puzzle as intended, fight that enemy as intended. that 'as intended' is important here, because there was no quick and easy trick to get around it. I couldn't rocket shield my way around a dungeon. I had to engage with the game on the game's terms, and the more freedom players have, the less players will be willing to do that.
and for sure, there is fun to be had in 'cheating' the game. I had fun climbing around the fire temple to beat it in unintended ways (because the puzzles were boring and it felt poorly designed and I got sick of trying to beat it the 'intended' way), and on my second go around of botw I learned windbombing specifically to try and cheat the shrines.
but it gets to a fucking point in totk where you at no point have to actually engage with the game, because there is always a 'correct' answer that does not challenge the player at all. there is always the hoverbike, always a rocket shield. there is no reason to engage with the games mechanics, and at what point is it even worth playing? and the answer to that question is different for everyone, but personally I just don't see the fucking point in it
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soryualeksi · 11 months ago
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I'm just too disgusted with Germany and Germans. Where I look, if you speak out against directly and enthusiastically chasing human beings from shelter to shelter with tanks and drones, where children lose limbs and can't even get the simplest of pain relief, when you speak out. The "very good, very anti-racist, very pro-democracy and freedom" Germans tell you that Palestinians are "all terrorists", that everyone in Gaza deserves this, that everyone should "GO BACK TO *YOUR* COUNTRY" (and of course all these Your Countries are all "backwards" and "uncivilized" and "barbaric", man, I LOVE you, German "anti-racists", you're gold).
Disgust. Disappointment.
Y'all are "against AfD" because it's not very cash money amirite xDD to vote the open fascists into power, but you don't consider Muslims or really ANYONE who isn't white Western European even a full human.
And in 10 years time you'll hold a fucking memorial to feel sorry about yourself and sob, "We just didn't know!"
You DO know and you're tormenting all of us with your "but it's FINE actually, they DESERVE it actually, they're not WORTHY to be saved by our divine enlightened civilized grace" this very instance.
Jewish people in Germany aren't safe FROM (FELLOW!!) GERMANS here, WHICH IS DISGUSTING, white-as-snow-and-very-much-NOT-Muslim neonazis are marching in the streets, wear their fucking insignia in the open, organize without anyone REALLY giving a fuck until it gets fashionable - but you want to scapegoat an ENTIRE CIVILIAN POPULATION for that shame on your heart (instead of confronting that no, your family was certainly NOT "in the resistance and really sooooooo against Hitler"). Do you think that when 2 million Palestinians are dead, you will finally feel better? Do you think that crying "but Hamas is SO MUCH WORSE than my own nazi great-grandparents" enough time will make the Holocaust go away, be forgotten, be washed out?
Or do you just enjoy "those savage brown people" cradling their dead kids, in pieces, and you were waiting out SO LONG to finally find an excuse to share these sick feelings inside of you with the world?
I hope that dead, black heart inside of you rots out of your chest.
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ablednt · 2 years ago
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Living in america is like. I may or may not have serious/deadly illnesses but fuck if I know because the closest doctor that accepts my insurance, is taking patients, and doesn't want to violently rip me off all of my medications and yell at me is two hours away and regardless of if I can get a ride or not that is simply not possible to manage as a primary care provider
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kairithemang0 · 2 days ago
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anyone else miss when the saf tag just felt really full? like that february-june era where there felt like there was SO MUCH saf posting. anyone else missing that????
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autisticlee · 11 months ago
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what the fuck is conservatives' problem with hormone blockers. I don't get it. they whine and complain and make laws against giving kids hormones because "they're too young to decide and will regret going through the wrong puberty so young." so we said okay, we will just block puberty until they are adults so they have time to decide and aren't taking hormones as kids. AND THESE PIECES OF SHIT HAVE ISSUES WITH THAT TOO. they suddenly decide that (trans)kids must be forced to go through wrong puberty.
there's no middle ground or compromising with them. they simply want all trans people dead, illegal, and nonexistent. and I truly, genuinely do not get it. I don't understand!!!! their arguments never answer that. it's always dumb reasons like "it's bad and I don't agree" I don't agree with your beliefs so I guess that means you need to stop too 🤷
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tpwk-formula1 · 3 months ago
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Heyy<3 I'd like a Pizza with Sicilian Crust,RedSauce ,Salami, Basil, Spinach, Broccoli, Roasted Artichokes ,Prosciutto and with that a Dr Pepper,Diet Coke and a littel Dessert
scenario: Lando and reader are dating and just having fun. But Lando wants to try something new and asks reader if he can film them. <3
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Lee-Lee's Pizzeria Menu
sicilian dating red sauce rough sex salami "Such a little cum slut" basil "I love to watch my cum leak from your pretty pussy" spinach "Awe I love to know I stretched you out just enough to take all my cock" broccoli "Made just for me huh?" roasted artichokes “im gonna put a baby in you” prosciutto "I love making this pretty pussy squirt" dr pepper dirty talk diet coke recording dessert yes served by Lando Norris
AN - OKAY! So I went a bit insane with this one and totally did something completely different and I really hope you like it! Any of the words in italics are a part of the scene and if it is regular that means it is either plot or current time!
Lando x gf! reader
TW - rough sex, sweet sex, oral (m & f receiving), squirting, multiple orgasms, face fucking, breath play, creampie, THERES A LOT GOING ON, MDNI 18+
WC 3300+
Y/N POV
"So I was thinking about something I think would be fun to try," Lando tells me softly making me perk my head up.
"You do that?" I question softly making Lando stare at me a bit confused.
"Do what?" He questions back after a few seconds of not understanding.
"Think. You think?" I joke making Lando instantly scoff and roll his eyes at my antics.
"You muppet," Lando groans before busting out into a little fit of giggles with me.
"Anyways, I was thinking maybe one of these times in the future I could maybe film us? I totally understand if you aren't comfortable I just would love to have a film of us together," Lando tells me softly making my face grow slightly hot at the thought of being filmed.
"Well like, would someone else have to film us? Will anyone see it? I just have a few questions," I tell Lando softly not shooting down his idea but not agreeing without clarification.
"No one would need to film us, we can hold the camera or get a tripod and I would never let anyone see it," Lando tells me softly making me nod my head letting him know I understand.
"Can I have some time to think about it?" I ask not fully sure I am comfortable with the idea just yet.
"Of course love! Whenever you know or think you're ready to do it we can rediscuss," Lando tells me softly while pulling me into his lap and placing a few soft kisses on my lips.
It has been a couple weeks since Lando had asked me if he could film us and with 2 back to back triple headers coming up I figured this break would be the best time to film some content so the both of us can have it while Lando is out traveling, especially since I'll only be able to go to a couple of his last races.
"Love, I have an idea," I tell Lando softly crawling into his lap and making him raise a brow for me to continue.
"Go on," Lando urges while I bite my lips letting the nerves get to me.
"You know how you wanted to film us having sex, I was thinking since we were gonna be traveling a bunch this next month while you're on break we could film little scenes and snippets in different places and then I can edit it all together so instead of it just being one time we have sex it's like I don't know how many, we have a lot of sex," I ramble making Lando smile at my last comment.
"Are you sure?" Lando asks me making me nod my head.
"Ya, I think it would be nice to have when you're away," I admit softly while my cheeks heat up realizing that I just admitted to touching myself when he was away.
"Oh my god, my once innocent girlfriend is admitting to touching herself when I'm away," Lando says with a smirk making my face heat up even further.
"Lando," I say while swatting at his chest softly.
"Do you get into our toys too?" Lando with an even more menacing look in his eyes.
"Don't act like I have noticed things go missing when you're away," I tell him softly with a raised brow. We both start laughing lightly. We had definitely sent enough pictures and videos throughout the year of us dating to know damn well we both touched ourselves when he was away but it was truly the first time we had talked about it.
"Can I make a request?" Lando asks softly.
"Ya of course, love," I reply making Lando's face heat in embarrassment just thinking about what he's about to ask.
"I kinda want a video of you touching yourself in the edit," Lando tells me softly making my face heat just thinking about touching myself in front of Lando.
"I'll film one of myself too and you don't have to do it in front of me. I actually would love for it to be a surprise," Lando continues making me relax slightly.
"Okay, I'll film is when you least expect it and it can be a surprise for you," I agree making Lando's face heat up at the thought.
"I think we have time to make our first film," Lando says with a smirk making me laugh lightly be quickly agree.
It's been almost a month since we came up with the plan and Lando leaves for Austin tomorrow which means tonight I give Lando our movie we created.
"Lan, come to the room when you have the rest of the night to yourself," I tell Lando softly peaking into the sim room where he was streaming with Max Fewtrell.
"Okay, do you need me right now? I can get off!" Lando tells me quickly making me laugh when I can hear Max telling Lando he was too damn wipped.
"No, it can wait! Enjoy your stream," I tell him softly.
"I'll be on no more than an hour," Lando tells me making me smile and retreat back into our room where I went into the bathroom and started getting ready.
I did my makeup and hair before I changed into a new lingerie set I knew Lando would love. Once I was all ready Lando was knocking on the bathroom door and asking if I was in there.
"Ya, just give me a minute," I tell him softly while taking a pic in the mirror and saving it for when Lando is away before typing my black silk robe around my body and heading out of the bathroom.
"Where are you going? I thought we were gonna be hanging out," Lando tells me softly making me laugh and shake my head.
"We are, just was bored while you were streaming," I lie softly knowing damn well I just wanted to look good for this moment.
"So I finished editing the video and its kinda long but I wanted to watch it with you," I tell him softly watching his face light up.
"I really hope you like it," I tell him softly making him pull me into his lap so I was stratting him.
"I'm gonna love it! You're the star of the film, nothing better than that," Lando tells me with a smile before pulling me in for a kiss and then letting me turn around so I was sat between his legs letting my back rest against my chest while I load up the 45-minute video of some of our sex adventures the last few weeks.
Scene 1 - Taken right after they agreed to make the video
"Oh fuck Lan," I moan looking right into the camera that Lando was holding and angling it to make sure to get all of my upper body in the shot.
"Fuck, it's like you were made just for me huh? always taking ym cock so well," Lando grunts in reply making me moan out louder.
"Lan I might cum again," I moan out making Lando's thrusting speed up while he brings one of his hands down to my clit where he teases it while I fall over the edge all around his cock.
That's where the video ended and a new scene was in front of us.
Scene 2 - Taken later that night right before we left for dinner. Quicky in the bathroom mirror
"Fucking hell, so goddamn tight," Lando grunts making me throw my head back with my eyes closed.
"No, fucking watch us," Lando says aggressively while he takes ahold of my hair and makes me watch Lando fuck into me from behind.
I was doing my best to hold the camera steady but I was failing miserably so Lando takes it from my hand and continues to fuck into my pussy from behind making sure to focus the camera on my face and the way my tits are bouncing around with each thrust.
"Fuck Lan," I moan loudly when I start cumming all over Lando's cock. He quickly pulls out of my soaked pussy and angles the camera to show him painting my ass with his cum.
We hadn't planned to fuck before dinner but with the idea of making a movie for each other, we were like little teenagers again fucking any chance we could.
Scene 3 - On a yacht off the Meddeteraian coast.
"Lando!" I scream feeling myself fall over the edge again squirting my pleasure all over Lando and the expensive couch we currently were on.
Lando had propped the camera up on the couch making sure to get his and my lower half in the frame of the camera.
"I love making this pretty pussy squirt," Lando groans after watching me squirt for the third time in a row.
"I want you to cum for me again," Lando groans against my lips.
"It's too much," I whine but Lando only speeds his actions up taking me over the edge rather quickly.
"Fuck squirting so much you could fill the sea," Lando teases.
That last comment had both Lando and I laughing lightly.
"Can't believe you kept that in. So embarrassing," Lando whispers into my ear while squeezing my waist a bit tighter.
"I thought it was a good comedic relief. I edited out most of the silly comments you say," I tell him making him groan realizing his post-nut clarity most of the time turns him into a comedian.
Scene 4 - In Y/N's childhood bedroom after visiting family.
"Fuck watching you with your niece is gonna make you a mother," Lando groans while pumping into my tight pussy.
"Fuck Lan," I moan once the words sink in.
"You want that? You want me to give you my babies," Lando grunts through staggered moans letting the pleasure get to him.
"Yes please," I gasp out trying to keep my volume down not wanting my parents to hear us.
"Fuck, I'm close. Please cum with me," Lando grunts out while bringing 2 fingers down to my clit and giving it a rub in small circles bringing the both of us over the edge. As we are cumming Lando grabs the camera from the little stand it was on and brings it to show my face as I'm cumming.
“I'm gonna put a baby in you,” Lando grunts as he continues to fuck my pussy through both of our orgasms.
"Fuck, you look so pretty like that," Lando grunts sending one last thrust deep into my pussy before slowly slipping out and putting the camera close to my core so the camera can pick up his cum slowly leaking from my pussy.
"I love to watch my cum leak from your pretty pussy," Lando grunts before the video is cut off.
"That was some of the best sex we've had," Lando groans out making me smile.
"Ya it was," I reply softly leaning back farther making Lando grunt out. I wiggle aroung for a second and that's when I feel it. Lando was hard. I just smirk wiggling around another second before Lando is gripping my hips to stop my movement.
"Don't act up," Lando roughly whispers into my ear.
Scene 5 - Lando's apartment after playing paddle with Max Verstappen
"Why the fuck would you do that," Lando says towering over me kneeling on the floor in front of him.
"Lando, I didn't do anything! I was just talking to Max," I reply looking straight up at him.
Lando set up the tripod at the end of the bed and it was currently angled down so it could catch me on my knees on the floor.
"You didn't do anything? Cause from what I seen was you getting all up and close with Max when I went to the bathroom," Lando's voice booms out into the room making me whimper at his anger.
"Lando he was showing me something on his phone," I argue back only making Lando roughly slap my tit.
"No more talking," Lando says before roughly shoving his cock into my mouth making me gag instantly around his cock.
I could feel Lando's hip starting to shift a little trying to grind into my back.
"Of all things you using me is what's getting you to dry hump me like a hormonal teenager," I say shifting my head slightly looking at Lando as his face flushes red and instantly stop his actions.
"Oh you can continue. Be a good boy and keep grinding," I say confidently making Lando groan and start bucking again.
"You'll pay for your little comment later," Lando grunts into my ear and I giggle lightly.
Scene 5 Cont.
"Awe I love to know I stretched you out just enough to take all my cock," Lando grunts as he continues to fuck my face making tears run down my cheeks.
Lando roughly shoves his cock deep into my throat and holds his hips completely cutting off all of my airflow. I count the seconds in my head and once I reach 12 seconds Lando yanks his cock out making me gag and start coughing.
"Fuck," I cough out trying to get as much air as possible.
"We're going again," Lando grunts tangling his hand in my hair again before shoving his cock back in.
Lando roughly fucks my throat making me continnously gag and cry around his cock. My face has become a complete mess ruining any speck of makeup I had on.
I was a true and proper whore for Lando in this moment and I loved every second of it.
"Fuck, I'm cumming," Lando grunts before he shoves his cock all the way into my throat and unleashes a massive load down my throat. I swallow as best I can with Lando so deep. Once he pulls out of my mouth I make sure to collect as much cum off his cock before opening my mouth and showing him the cum pooling in my mouth.
I watch as Lando gathers a large wad of spit in his mouth before leaning down and slowly spitting it into my mouth mixing his spit with his cum.
"Hm, you're such a little cum slut. Swallow," Lando finally says making me close my mouth and swallow his cum and spit mixure.
"I think that's the sluttiest thing I've ever done," I admit softly when the scene in front of us ends. Lando had stopped his grinding as soon as he saw himself shove his cock all the way in my mouth cutting my airflow off. I think when you're in the moment everything seems so normal but then watching it back you realize how rough it really is.
"Do I do that often," Lando asks softly making me shift my body to face him realizing he needed a serious moment.
"Cut my air flow off? Not often but love, it is not something you have to change. If it was I would have asked you to stop. We have safe words and safe actions to get us out of every scene we ever do, I haven't used it for a reason," I tell Lando softly while stroking his cheek. I can tell he's not convinced but he's become more relaxed.
"I didn't realize that was what you looked like when you were struggling for air," Lando admits making me smile softly.
"Pretty slutty huh?" I joke I try lightening the mood while also pulling him in for a kiss trying to show him that I was really okay with it.
"Promise, you don't mind it?" Lando asks softly.
"Promise!" I reply back with a smile turning back around to face the laptop once again.
Scene 6 - Home alone while visiting Lando's parents
"Lan! They might come home," I whisper against Lando's lips as he pulls my body even closer to his.
We were in the pool enjoying the sun when Lando set up the camera right on the poolside clearly showing his intentions.
"They won't I promise," Lando replies while lifting my body out of the water and onto the edge of the pool. Lando changes the camera angle to make sure to get his next actions in the frame.
"We'll be quick if you're worried," Lando replied while pulling off the bottoms to my bikini leaving my lower half completely bare. Lando instantly brings his mouth down to my clit giving it a strong suck and making me whine.
"Fuck," I moan softly when I feel Lando shift his hands to the front of my robe teasing me over my lingerie. Lando's mind finally registers that he's feeling lingerie instead of my regular thong so he's pulling the front of my robe open to see his gift under.
"I'm surprised it took you this long," I reply with a smirk when he's opened the robe to see a specially made lingerie set to have similar accents to his Hungarian GP helmet.
It was a pretty light blue set with little hand-sewn embellishments to look like the hand-painted flowers that littered the helmet.
"Fuck baby, how did you even get this?" Lando asks softly when he realizes it is more than a light blue set.
"Made just for you," I reply with a smirk making him groan and throw his head back.
"You're the best. One of the most thoughtful things ever," Lando replies back softly as he brings his hand back down to my pussy and starts teasing me over my panties.
"Already soaked for me," I feel Lando smirk against my ear.
Cont scene 6
"Lan, feel so good," I gasp when I feel Lando softly push 2 fingers into my busy making me gasp at the feeling.
"I want you to cum," Lando grunts into my pussy sending a whole new wave of pleasure coursing through my body.
"Oh god," I cry out when Lando speeds up his actions bringing me closer to my orgasm.
"Cum for me," Lando roughly tells me sending me straight into a squirting orgasm.
"Fuck," I scream out as I watch my pleasure spray all over Lando and into the pool soaking him with more than just the pool water.
"Good fucking girl," Lando says while riding my orgasm out before he's slipping his fingers out and slipping them into his mouth to clean them off.
"Fuck, I can't take it anymore," Lando says roughly while slipping his fingers out of my lingerie and turning me around so I can face Lando.
I pull him in for a kiss while I feel him pulling his boxers and sweats down to reveal his leaking cock.
I'm instantly climbing fully into his lap with my lingerie pulled to the side so I can sink down taking all of Lando's cock deep into my pussy.
"Fuck I don't think I'm gonna last long," Lando grunts when I start bouncing on his cock clearly pent up from watching some of our sex over the past month.
"Me either," I moan loudly bouncing faster while Lando brings a hand between our bodies and starts teasing my clit knowing that will throw me over the edge far faster than anything else.
"Fuck Lando," I cry out as I feel my orgasm start to build at an embarrassing rate.
"I'm gonna cum," Lando grunts bucking his hips up to meet my thrusts trying to bring the both of us over the edge quicker.
"Oh fuck," I scream out as I start cumming all over Lando's cock pulling him with me and making him bury his cock deep in my pussy and filling it up with his cum.
"Fuck," Lando grunts making me sigh in contentment.
"The rest of the video can be a surprise. I wanna spend my last night between these thighs," Lando tells me softly still fully seated on his cock.
"Deal," I reply softly pulling him in for a kiss while we relax until the next round.
True to Lando's words we did go at it almost all night not stopping until we saw the first light of the sun rising.
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littlecafe · 2 years ago
Video
youtube
team 23:00 (dgna) - mirotic (orig. tvxq)
global voting: https://peaktime.jtbc.co.kr/peaktime/en/vote + Naver NOW app where to watch: viki (there are eng subs!)
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gotta-winwin · 30 days ago
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OT13 Reaction -- to winning at MAMA awards
masterlist
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a/n: in celebration of our boys winning both AOTY awards at MAMA last night. i am so incredibly proud i feel like i raised them or something. like guys- it is that serious they are my family and im going insane.
SCOUPS: you're the first one he's calling once he's offstage - he's dialling your number and a whole string of nonsense rattles off him the moment you pick up. he can't string together proper words as you congratulate him. tells you how fucking happy the boys are - you should've seen them, love - did you see woozi crying? and DK - he smiled so big - needs you to bring him back to earth and remind him that this is his award too. he deserves it just as much as they do.
JEONGHAN: he's literally been bored out of his mind as you guys sit at home, watching the award show live. the only times he's acc been paying full attention was whenever groups he knew personally were on screen - and even then - you know you're losing him to how tired he is. lets out the tiniest, babiest gasp when seventeen is announced as the winner. is crying but turns away so you can't call him out on it.
JOSHUA: he runs home to you right after their dinner together and collapses into your arms. he's spent from the sheer chaos and adrenaline. mumbles sweet nothings about how this award is also yours. we won, baby. we share everything - this award is because of you - all because of you.
JUN: he's hiding out in his filming trailer so he can watch the award show through your phone on facetime - it's grainy and glitchy as HELL but he does not care. there's a 3 second lag when seventeen's announced as the winner - so he can hear you screaming but he doesn't know why. his mouth drops once the wifi catches up and he's practically glowing the entire day on set.
HOSHI: comes home wasted and a bundle of pure energy. he's on a high from the win- rushes home to yell into your ear how ecstatic he is as he tackles you for a hug. tells you he's literally so down to name your firstborn child AOTY just cause.
WONWOO: he comes home rather calm despite the chaotic evening he just had. runs you through his whole day- from getting his makeup done to winning the award to having celebratory dinner. you sit and listen happily, cause this is the most yapping you've ever seen this man do and you're SO happy. finishes his yap session by telling you that you make it all worth it - you're the real award, not MAMA.
WOOZI: tells you not to watch their acceptance speech even though he knows you already did :( is uber embarrassed at how emotional his speech was. I was gonna go up and accept it like a nonchalant cool mysterious man but NO! I just had to cry. he doesn't talk about the win much to you, preferring to just enjoy a quiet night in after the crazy evening. whispers to you once you fall asleep that this is why he does music and thanks you and the boys for being his biggest fans.
THE8: sends you the badass photo of him with all their trophies, followed with a long paragraph about how grateful he is to have you next to him through it all. he's unbelievably bright and happy for the next couple weeks, resulting in you kind of missing sassy Hao and asking for him back. side eyes you when you ask and quips "you didn't win a daesang- I did." Well...he's back ig.
MINGYU: comes home and the first thing he says to you is: aren't you proud i didn't cry? pouts when you rewind the clip to point out: he did in fact cry, he was just hiding his ginormous body behind his members. vows to you he won't cry the next time they win- and yes, he promises there will be a next time. and many after that.
DK: a bundle of joy upon his arrival home. keeps telling you he doesn't know what he did to deserve all this- completely floored when you start ranting about why he deserves it all. blushes and hides his face cause the compliments have him shy.
SEUNGKWAN: comes home fully ready to unleash his bragging rights. asks you to only address him by AOTY daesang winner for the next hour, until the joke gets old and he just wants to relax with you. gets a little sappy retelling stories about their trainee days as you both walk down memory lane together.
VERNON: hands you a wad of cash the moment he enters your shared apartment. oh well. i lost the bet. he literally bet against his team winning and ofc you took him on it cause obv seventeen is gonna win?? tells you he was confident svt was going to win he just wanted an excuse to give you cash.
DINO: promises to shout you out the next time svt wins a daesang. obv you don't believe him, so he defends himself, promising that he will 100% name drop his girlfriend on global television for shits and giggles. yeah, i'll just grab the mic and say "i dedicate this award to my WIFE" and watch the internet explode. why not?
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postmoe · 2 months ago
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Moe im absolutely DROOLING at capitano 😵 May I request yandere! capitano preeety plees with a cherry on too 😫😫 U CANT TELL ME HES NOT JUST AHHXJSNSNSN HES SO FINEEEE
im sorry it's been so long life is just UGH i think we all need a bit of capitano rn-
i think i made the yandere a little too subtle but I hope it's still okay-
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When you first fell to this world, no one believed you to be an outsider. You were just crazy, a patient who escaped the asylum.
It happened when you were out on a job, your last year of med school and you were doing your practical part, following along in ambulances and assisting paramedics. There had been a building collapse, chaos everywhere, dust surrounding the scene. You weren't supposed to stray too far, it's only when you heard a young voice calling from help did you separate, calling out your intentions to your colleague before rushing through the door with your bag of equipment held tightly to your chest. As you began through the doorway, it was as if an earthquake struck, everything trembling and crumbling. You couldn't believe your eyes, the way the ground turned blocky, a red and black colour eating the sides of your world like an 8-bit transition. Gravity hit hard as you fell through, the broken, wooden floors turning into a faraway city, canopies of trees, rivers, mountains - before you fainted.
When you awoke you couldn't find any injuries that would result from a free fall from the atmosphere, namely death. If anything, you were a little tender in the muscles. You found your med bag not far from you before awkwardly making your way, searching for help.
One lonely night you had approached a group of soldier-like people. They were part of the 'Fatui', which people seemed to fear but what other option did you have? You told them your story, begged for food, and out of pity some had helped you. A lot of laughs came your way, but even so, you sat at a table with drunken fatui and got a nice bowl of stew and bread.
Just as everyone was leaving, you felt a large hand on your shoulder. It was their Captain, who the party under his command conveniently referred to him as 'Capitano'. He holds out a small, woven bag once he gets your attention, dropping it in her hands when you hold them out. It feels like coins - Mora, if you remember correctly, the currency of this world - and regards you with only a few words, "I believe you. However, I cannot help you."
It was the little glimmer of hope you needed. You stored some leftover bread in your paramedic jacket, running after him and calling him to wait, to have a conversation but, he was a busy man. He retreated into a nice looking motel on the outskirts of the city, leaving you to sit outside.
So you did. You waited all night on the side of the road, resting until he eventually came back out.
.
Granted, following an 'evil' organisation wasn't the smartest thing, that's only if the words of the people you've met are to be believed. As of now, they're the only people who have reached out a helping hand, and Capitano, the only one to make you finally breathe and remember that you aren't insane; that this is real.
Still, you keep your distance, following diligently like a lost puppy. "Leave her be," Capitano had said when one of his men asked about you, "She is no threat." Later he would say he was hoping you would get the message to journey on your own, to find your own way.
On a cold night he had saved you, though to anyone it appeared as nothing more than an easy kill. Two hilichurls, you were half asleep, focused more on keeping warm than any dangers. It wasn't until you heard the slash of his blade did you even notice he was there, the monsters leaving behind blood and dust in their wake.
Capitano drapes a blanket over you, "Come." You follow him into the camp, beyond the guards and closer to a fire. He points to a sleeping mat, "If you're going to follow me then stay within the group." With that, he retreats to his tent. You can't help the tears of gratitude as you bathe in the warmth, your sleep the best it's been in weeks.
You make friends with the fatui, it's unanimously agreed that everyone in Capitano's ranks are morally... adequate, compared to other Harbingers. "Don't even get me started on Il Dottore's..." one mentions, and you think as a 'doctor' yourself, you couldn't handle hearing his horror stories.
Eventually, you become part of their medic team, showing them all the fun tools and medications from your world. Even if they don't believe you, they pretend to, and they show interest. You've only cried twice when reminiscing.
A few times you've seen Capitano enter the medic tent, he grabs some bandages and some ointment before retreating to his tent. "Would you like some help?" You ask, not for the first time, and it won't be the last.
His usual response is what comes, "No, thank you."
It's a routine, you like to think he appreciates it.
.
You're not a stranger to violence. During your schooling you saw a lot of gore, it never phased you in the ways it would others. Of course, it was sad, seeing children who needed to have a leg amputated, people being victimised by a violent stranger, you could only do your best to give them the rest of their lives.
War, however, was another thing. Footage does nothing compared to witnessing it, the people you eat dinner with being ripped apart by monsters, other factions of the land getting burnt to death by the power of their gods, or frostbitten and forced to watch their comrades suffer until they themselves succumb.
Capitano scared you, in a way. He was always so strong, so willing to give his all to anyone who had the courage to fight back. It was his way in honour. You're lucky he had a sense of justice, apparently anyone else could have killed you and be done with it. Sometimes you imagine what it would be like if he drew his sword against you, or used his large hands and wrap them around your neck, suffocating you until he saw the whites of your eyes...
He was a monster, but maybe compared to the other, real monsters out there, he was the better option.
Tonight he got hurt, enough to show the blood spreading through his clothes. Wounds and scars were normal but this made your stomach churn. You see a glimpse of a monster claw that he's tried to hide with his cloak. There's a tear in his sleeve as well, showing his long glove underneath.
Nope. You can't just sit by as he struggles, you signed a contract saying that you would help anyone, no matter the circumstance. As he walks back to his tent, you follow him closely behind, your bag in hand. He stops, the flap partially open as he turns to you and says in a strained voice, "I'm fine. Go tend to the others."
You shake your head defiantly, staring into the dark abyss of his helmet with conviction.
He huffs, entering the tent and murmuring, "Do as you please."
His tent is much larger than any of the others, perhaps the medical one only being marginally bigger. There's a fireplace, a desk with a multitude of papers, scattered, used bandages and a large pile of bed wrapping and furs. He takes a seat on the chair near the desk, removing his coat and grabbing the claw, about to yank it out when you slap his hand away.
You waggle your finger at him, crouching to get a better look at the wound, "You're only going to make it worse. Honestly, if that's how you treat yourself it's a wonder you're still alive. Help me get your shirt off."
There's a hint of hesitation in him, though you're only a little sure you see it. Your focus is on pulling it over the claw without moving it too much, it had gone through bandages around his stomach as well, wrapping over his chest, the rest of his body... Look over him, taken aback. His flesh isn't normal, what you thought were gloves was actually the decay of his arms. No, decay doesn't seem right either but even so, there's no life. He lets you take it in, waiting until your eyes look to his mask. "My body is rotten, rotting, still," he clarifies, and you realise that perhaps decay is the right word, it's just a different meaning in this world. "I'm fine," he says again, as though expecting this to be too much for you, "You can leave."
You wonder why the smell isn't so bad, the sweet tinge mixing with a sour after scent. It wasn't the most pleasant but if you're being honest, it wasn't horrible. You put this aside and give him a dead stare, "You're so aggravating. Are you just allergic to help? Shut up and let tend to you."
He sits still after that, leaning back in the chair as you get to work. You tell him when it might hurt, he doesn't even flinch when you're prepared to extract the claw. Even the inside of his body isn't normal, his blood seeming to pulse out than continuously flow, the colour off in a blackish way. You had removed the bandages before, so the feeling of his leathery skin was odd, there was an odd sense to it that you couldn't describe. Darkness? How could you feel darkness?
You're priority is the claw wound, which you diligently tend to, cleaning and stitching it until you were satisfied with the result. You have a gauze left that you wrap onto him, sitting back on your heels to admire your work. "I'll have to check on it twice a day. If you need help bathing let me know, or I can instruct one of your men how to assist you without infecting the wound," you tell him, expecting him to blatantly deny any outside help.
Instead, he changes the topic entirely, speaking lowly, "I still can't help you."
"What?" You ask, mind still on the topic of his wellbeing.
He rolls his shoulders and looks to his tattered shirt, reaching to put it back on, though leaving it open, "To get back home, I still can't help you. You're wasting your time here."
Oh, so that's what he meant. You haven't spoken about it with him at all, and you did have questions you wanted to ask but you're not even sure if you have the mindset to discuss your fate immediately after learning the man you've been following is rotting before your eyes. It feels kinda shitty to bring up your trauma over his. You reach forward, fingertips grazing against the damaged skin above his stomach, wishing you could do something more than than bandage a wound, "Does it hurt?"
"I've had worse, at least it didn't come out the other side," he tilts his head to the claw, and you can imagine he might have a disinterested look by the sounds of his monotone voice.
You laugh, and you're not sure if he's saying that so you don't bring up his skin but you honestly can't believe what you're seeing, "No no, your body. Your flesh. Does it hurt?" You distantly wonder if that little vial of morphine you saved would alleviate it. Would it be a blessing of reprieve or a torture since it won't last?
Capitano sighs, probably the first sign of true emotion you've heard from him, "Yes, it's very painful. I'm used to it, however."
"Does the ointment help, the one you get from the medic tent? God I wish I could just," you frustratingly clench your fist before opening your palm to him, exhaling in sombre, "Take your pain away. I'm a medic in my world, but here I feel really useless sometimes."
You sit in comfortable silence, still crouched down before him. He hasn't removed your hand, you're not sure why but perhaps the cool touch it soothing to him? His muscles tense underneath you, and you only open your eyes when you feel him relax again. You're face-to-face with a strange light from your palm, a swirling breeze like a vortex coming inwards. You freaked out, retracting your hand fast but only getting a fraction of a distance before Capitano grasped your wrist, forcing you to press back against him. It's too late, whatever concentration you had fades, as does the light.
The way his shoulders sag gives a sense of disappointment. "What was that?" You practically whisper, a little scared of whatever just came from you.
He finally relents your hand, leaning back in his chair, "I believe... It's an ancient power. I shall do some research."
Capitano is curt, his head turned to the side and away from you. You get the hint, knees cracking loudly as you stand, causing you to laugh anxiously while you dust off the imaginary dirt from your thighs, "Y-Yeah, okay. Thank you. I'll check in on you in the morning."
Your goodnights are brief, the flap of the tent closing gently behind you.
There's a pyroslinger skirmisher standing guard at his tent, you give him a pointed finger and declare, "If you see him take off his bandages without me, you let me know! I won't tolerate my patients disrespecting my orders."
He gives you a salute, playing along, "Yes ma'am!"
.
Capitano's body is corrupted by the abyss, he's been stuck in a torturous torment of decay for over 500 years. Your heart aches at this, a condition your mind struggles to comprehend but there is one saving grace you both had realised:
You have the power to ease his pain.
It's a form of light that counters his darkness, and whilst you can never truly cure him, you can certainly take the edge off and allow him to rest. Physical touch works the best, a few times now as you're focusing on his ailments has he fallen asleep. Now you provide mandatory rest, it had taken a lot of complaining and arguing but you finally managed to get him to take off his helmet.
"I've seen the aftermath of a person's skull from a violent car crash, I don't think it could be worse," you had told him.
To which he responded, "What is a car?"
Seamless to say, you were correct. If you were honest, you were expecting some sort of Freddy Krueger look, though he certainly didn't meet those expectations. What caught you off guard were the piercing blue of his eye. Sometimes, you had thought you'd caught a glimpse of them through the mask, whenever raw emotion truly shined from the Captain. Now, you know you weren't imagining things. One eyes was scarred shut, though he could open the lid, the eye itself was pale and sat naturally closed. The scar across it took up almost half of his face, his skin partially remained its true colour, though he says its faded over time. The blight that covers most of his body travels up his neck, like twisted vines growing along his cheeks and forehead. His long, black hair remained neat, only a few strands falling forward once the mask is removed.
The tent remains securely closed at the time, your back facing it as you both rest in the furs of his bed for extra security. You hum a song that doesn't exist here as you caress your fingers through his hair and down his neck, circling around his shoulders and along his spine. He rests comfortably in your lap while the light from you absorbs his pain. One of his hands reaches out, grasping your left hand and intertwining his fingers with yours, his own hand enveloping yours like a delicate treasure, "I'm not sure I could ever let you leave now. You should have turned around when you still had the chance."
You laugh, because you know Capitano and you know his values. Even as the alarm bells ring from the way he squeezes your hand, like he'll never let you go, you ignore them in favour of your naivety, "If I left then I would have been torn apart by monsters."
He grunts and rolls so he's on his back. Your smile is awkward from the position he's put himself in, your chin tilting up to lessen the double chin from looking down. His hand now reaches up to your face gently stroking your cheek as he thinks aloud, "So as long as I stay in dangerous areas, you won't run away."
His words are making you feel too uncomfortable, so you flick his forehead and scold him, "Stop being so weird. You've kept me safe this far along, right? As long as I'm here, I'm going to help you." You hold his hand against your cheek, hoping to comfort him with a smile, "Besides, who would I follow if not my Captain? Anyone else would just be a downgrade."
Capitano's stare is as piercing as ever. He takes his time sitting up, shirtless and uncaring of the cold temperature. You much prefer this angle, looking slightly up so you can still meet his gaze. True to Capitano fashion, he hits you with a curveball and says something that catches you off guard, "I want you to sleep with me tonight."
Your face goes red, eyes avoidant as you stammer, "F-For the comfort, right? To keep your pain at bay?"
You think this is the first time you've seen him smile and, if this is his joking tone then... What was everything else? "Of course, for the pain. Why, was there something else you had in mind?"
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moonsaver · 2 months ago
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wheover that anon was that spoke up about mr reca I LOVE U WE SHOULD KISS
ALSO YESSS IRIS FAM MEMBER! READER WHOS AN ACTRESS/ACTOR!!! just imagine being THE mr. reca’s favorite thespian he’s ever worked with oh my gosh im drooling rn 😍🥰😋🔥😜
Yes anon!! Very real of the other anon. And of you.
This is yandere, so tw
Iris!Reader who's an actress/actor would smash. Imagine despite your humble beginnings and barely being able to keep your family afloat you make it. Although perhaps our beloved actor/actress doesn't quite fit the beauty standard, or they haven't made their debut in a popular film, or maybe they just aren't what most movies are focused on right now, considering the disparity between an actor's range and the genres they might partake in.
Here comes Mr. Reca, swooping you from who knows where, plopping you down into a makeup chair and reading the script to you at 50 words/sec speed. You have no idea where you are or what's going on before you're pushed onto the movie set, completely winded before Mr. Reca throws his hands up all "oh alright! Since you can't get the hang of this yet, I'll lend you a hand" or whatever excuse he loves to pull out of his ass. He personally guides you with the movie scripts, drags you along to any parties he may have to attend, forces you "into the filming sphere" or whatever by "exposure". You could be sleeping and he'd blast into your personal residence at 4 in the morning, and drag you along. He probably even forces you to sit down and listen to all his ideas and brainstorming sessions.
The more time you spend with him, the more sense he eventually makes. It's strange, and you almost end up questioning if you might be going insane. But you brush it off, because you realise he's been caring to you. Unlike most directors, he does care for his cast. He does provide a hospitable atmosphere to work with, which makes you realise just why your co-stars are so eager to please him. Mr. Reca, although insane and hard to decipher, makes you almost gravitate towards him when his eccentricities are laid bare before you.
Every time your short contract ends, he's already got the next one printed out and ready for you to sign. You appear so often beside him, it's unusual for you not to. Often, you make headlines with Mr. Reca backing you up. It's all in the palm of his hands when he gets you to stardom.
Oh, but isn't it a bit too much?
Nosy paparazzi that continually stalk and harass you, fans or even those that despise you call you or your family, people surrounding your home just to get a glimpse of your daily life, drivers who follow your car everywhere.. it's a bit too much for your pretty little head to handle. Mr. Reca is all too familiar with these pests. Why don't you stand closer and let him deal with them? Nevermind the fact he paid them, or that he's been rather eager to practice method acting with you.
Speaking of, he's replaced all your co-stars whenever it comes to suggestive or intimate scenes, considering himself as their stand-in since, well.. You're more comfortable with him, aren't you? You've been under his wing for so long, it's easier for you to do these uncomfortable scenes with him, instead of those no good actors.
You're not sure when it happens, but you notice the amount of cast dwindling until it's you and him, all alone. The movies are beautiful, but it's hard to hide the shivering by just pure acting skills when you realise no one has you in their grasp as much as Mr. Reca. His eager, insane eyes watching you like a rabid animal hidden behind a camera when you act all alone on a solitary set. This is the last time he allows the privilege of your visage on the lens, before you mysteriously go missing. You are meant for only the lens of his observant eyes, he states, as though confessing a haunting realisation.
Oh well, you can continue acting. Just remember your audience. It's only him you have to consider pleasing.
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hazelsmirrorball · 3 months ago
Text
And they were roommates | F1 Drivers
summary: y/n wanted to live in New York, so that's how she ended up living with three losers faceclaim: Sabrina Carpenter pairings: oscar piastri x fem!reader, lando norris x fem! reader, Logan Sargent x fem!reader, franco colapinto x fem!reader
a/n: Excuse any errors english isn’t my main language. this is inspired by new girl
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yourusername via instagram!
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liked by logansargent, oscarpiastri and 138 others
yourusername can someone pick me up? I don't think I can live with them anymore
tagged: @logansargent @oscarpiastri @landonorris
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logansargent we look really hot with our shades on!! But why the hell are Oscar and Lando wearing ur bras?
yourgirlbestfriend omg!! I thought you were joking when you said they used trash cans as pools in ur balcony
-> yourusername nothing is a joke when it comes to them
landonorris shoes off the couch! I sleep there
-> yourusername boo you whore
francolapinto you look so cute :)
-> yourusername omg im blushing
-> logansargent she really is blushing btw
-> yourusername delete this!
-> landonorris @oscarpiastri are you seeing this? isn't this ur girl
-> yourusername stop cockblocking me
-> oscarpiastri We are just friends.
-> landonorris but you wish you were more
-> yourusername do you guys know that private message exist
-> landonorris but I want your whole 100 followers to see that Oscar has a crush on you
-> oscarpiastri I do not.
-> <-
Logan and Y/n stood in front of the tv as the Zumba routine played at full volume. The clock read 4:30 am as the pair tried following the middle aged woman in front of them. Logan skipped in a circle moving his dumbbells side to side. As Y/n hollered when the woman on the TV would ask if they were hype. Oscar, being tired from the night before he could hear the pair having the time of their lives with the zumba. He quickly slipped on some pants not bothering to put on a shirt while walking down the stairs rubbing the tiredness of his eyes. When Oscar finally got to the bottom of the stairs he quickly got flashed with Logan’s short shorts. 
“Oh, Oscar, are you joining us?” Logan said, turning to him as he placed the dumbbells down taking a sip from his water. Y/n also turned jogging in place smiling at Oscar. 
 “I thought you guys were doing that dancing class” Oscar said as he yawned looking at the pair thinking that the clothes they had on was a cause of his imagination and lack of sleep. 
“Yeah, dummy. What do you think we are doing? This is a dancing class. We are doing Zumba. Logan found a cheap disk at a thrift store and he also found these sick outfits so we are matching with the ladies on the tv” Y/n responded stretching her wrist warmers. 
“Yeah, we are getting ripped”
“I thought you guys meant you were going to the gym and that they were offering the class. It's four in the morning guys. That stupid song is driving me insane” Oscar said glaring at the pair as he leaned against the wall. Logan groaned, throwing his head back as Y/n raised an eyebrow at him. 
“You are certainly not invited to our pilates mom group” 
“Logan, you are not a mother. Neither of you are” 
“Well with all you bitching and moaning, I should be” 
Lando pushed open the apartment door after  having one to many drinks at the club he looked at Y/n and Logan and furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. 
“Are you guys supposed to be John Travolta and Jaime Lee Curtis?”
-> <-
landonorris via instagram !
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 354 others
landonorris I just noticed that my whole camera roll is dedicated to my loser roommates. I need a life.
tagged: @logansargent @oscarpiastri @yourusername
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yourusername mom! I swear I don't drink
-> landonorris babe don't lie. those white claws are on ur side of the fridge
-> yourusername those white claws aren't mine, that's Logan side of the fridge
-> logansargent I hope none of you are touching my white claws
yourusername Oscar is such a nerd
-> oscarpiastri Hey! I have instagram.
-> logansargent surprisingly
-> <- Y/n pulled Franco Colapinto’s arm as she quietly tried to sneak him out of the apartment without waking her roommates up. Franco’s clothes hung loosely on her body as she shushed him for what felt like the one hundredth time. As they were almost near the exit, Lando turned on the light with a huge grin on his face.  
“Is this supposed to be his walk of shame?” 
“Lando shut up and go to be” Y/n replied through gritted teeth, as Franco stood in front of the door awkwardly. 
“I will not shut up. This is the first time you bring a guy home. Honestly I am so proud of you. I was worrying that I was the only one bringing people to the apartment. But now I don’t feel as bad.” Lando said walking up to them and wrapping his arms around both of their shoulders. 
“Lando, you literally bring two people daily. I think you should feel bad.” 
“No because, this is different. Wait until Osar finds out. Hold up, this means you are not a virgin anymore. Oh my God my kids are growing up.” 
“Lando, I wasn’t a virgin” 
“That’s what I am saying, Did he..Oh God. Oscar! Oscar, come here” 
The three of you guys stare at each other in silence while oscar quickly walks into the kitchen looking at the trio. He looked Franco up and down, quickly turning to Lando 
“What” 
“Did you know, Y/n isn’t a virgin anymore?” 
“I know”
“You know?!” 
“Who did you took it?”
-> <-
yourusername via insta stories! landonorris via insta stories!
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-> <-
The four of roommates sat on the couch quietly scrolling on their phones. They have been like that for like for an hour. The peaceful silence had broke when Lando gasped loudly.
“You guys remember that we agreed on doing a group costume”  
“No one agreed to do a group costume” 
“No, you guys did!”
“You said, we should do a group costume for Charles halloween party and we didn’t answer” 
“Anyways, as I was saying, I saw a tik tok of some roommates that dressed as the main south park characters and that would be perfect for us. Logan can be Kyle, Y/n can be Stan, OScar can be Catman and I can be Kenny” Logan said while showing them the tiktok on his phone. Y/n laughed and turned to Logan. 
“You being Kenny is insane” 
“Why?” 
“Oscar should be Kenny and you should be Cartman” Y/n responded as if it were obvious. 
“Stop defending your boyfriend. I don’t want to be Cartman”
“Lando. You are literally Cartman”
“ I am not! I already bought the costumes in our sizes so shut up”
“Wait, why did my card got charged” 
-> <-
oscarpiastri via instagram!
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liked by logansargent, landonorris and 50 others
oscarpiastri I am never saying yes for a 4th of July party.
tagged: @logansargent @oscarpiastri @yourusername
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yourusername who is that lady in the last picture, she is quite attractive
landonorris I look so good in this pic, what the fuck
logansargent oscars active era?
charlesleclerc I think I missed a chapter, what's up with that last picture
-> landonorris I don't even know what's going on, I thought the little guy that flirts was still in the picture
-> francolapinto i am taller than you
Francolapinto invite me next time
-> oscarpiastri No.
-> <-
“Damn it! Everyone to the bathroom right now!” Logan yelled, making everyone enter the small shared bathroom. Logan gripped on his towel showing it to the group. “Is someone playing a joke on me? Honestly, why is my towel still damp?”
“Because that’s not your towel, Logan. It’s my towel” Lando responded, pointing at the blue towel he was holding. Logan looked at Lando with fear. 
“No it’s not. Your towel is the red one. It always has been the red one” 
“I'll tell you this, pal. I've never used that. I do use that one every single day.”
“Oh, God.” Logan said, gagging. 
‘This towel's so warm and fluffy. It's like it's been in the sun forever.” Y/n said, touching the red towel. 
“This means you two have been drying your junk with the same towel.” Oscar commented, trying to escalate the situation. 
“Intimate.”
“Are you out of your mind?! What do you mean, am I... How do you think this is your towel? Do you even wash it?” Logan asked, trying to not get worked up, which he was failing miserably.  
“No, I don't wash the towel; the towel washes me. Who washes a towel?” Lando responded matter of factly while the others looked at him shocked. 
“You never wash?”
“You wash your towel?” 
“You never wash the towel?” 
“What am I going to do? Wash the shower next? Wash a bar of soap? You got to think here, pal.” Lando said, rolling his eyes. 
“I'm furious right now.” 
“ I get out of the damn shower, I'm clean as a damn baby, and I use the towel.”
“Let me ask you this. Have you been wearing my underpants” Logan asked as his eye twitch. 
“Sometimes, yeah. Who cares? You guys don't wear each other's underpants? You're lying. We all wear each other's underwear.”
-> <-
logansargent via instagram!
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri and 900 others
logansargent loving my roommates (excluding the little one)
tagged: @yourusername @oscarpiastri @landonorris
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landonorris the little one?! y/n is the little one. I am taller than her
-> yourusername oh shut up short king
-> logansargent take away the king
-> yourusername short
-> logansargent short
-> carlosainz short
-> oscarpiastri short
-> alexalbon short
-> georgerussell short
-> francolapinto short
oscarpiastri you are so American, im scared
-> <-
“I want to see who got podium!” Oscar said through his headset grinning, while lando scoffed. 
“I obviously got podium, did you not see my hard work out there? I for certain won” Lando replied hitting the table in front of him. As the screen went black. 
They all had been like that for the past two hours and none of them had gotten podium. So they had come up with a group strategy for at least one of them to come on top. When the screens comes back up lando yells angrily while Logan groans. 
“You guys didn’t give me five starts!” 
“Come on, Lando! We can’t  all be on the podium” Y/n replied from her room through the headset.
“You are such and ass. My outfit was better than your. Fuck! The theme was Main Character, you did a basic outfit, while I actually played the game correctly and did Sharpay Evans. It pisses me off that I lost. Like this game is dress to impress. Not dress to be mediocre. I am done”
logansargent via insta stories! oscarpiastri via insta stories!
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-> <-
yourusername via instagram!
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liked by logansargent, oscarpiastri and 127 others
yourusername apartment 512 got a doggy!
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charlesleclerc now our doggies can have a doggy date
-> landonorris I don't want my dog near your dog, leclerc
logansargent why did we also get pictures of you and Oscar? what happen to that handsome guy
landonorris if you guys are together don't you dare break up because we have a lease together, thanks x
alexalbon since when is Oscar this happy
oscarpiastri via instagram!
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oscarpiastri my favorite roommate
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landonorris I didn't get a post for my birthday
logansargent I think we are out of the loop what is happening
alexalbon Oscar is in his active era. I am afraid
yourusername love you, Osc.
logansargent you guys can't leave me alone with lando if you move out!
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star-sim · 1 year ago
Text
"nooo! she's taken!" ☆ enha maknaes
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☆ non-idol! bf! enhypen maknaes x celebrity! fem! reader ☆ summary: you are a very well-loved celebrity, and your relationship is finally revealed to the public. ☆ genre: fluff, another poor attempt at humor, it's very silly ☆ warning(s)? none! lmk if you'd like to see this w the hyungs! hyung ver.
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sunoo ☆
so youre a famous actress
you have your official instagram account
and then your personal one, that you only allow family and personal friends to follow
sunoo, your bf, also has an account on instagram
since most of you friends and family know him, it's not uncommon for him to take your phone and post on your personal account
one of those "hai guys i stole her phone 🤭"
all in good fun
so one night, you and sunoo and cuddling
it was one of those vibey nights
the lights were dim, candles lighting up the room with their orangey hue, light music playing in the background
laying on you and sunoo's shared bed, his face buried into the crook of his neck while you run your fingers through his hair
its honestly so soft and warm and comfy :]
the two of you aren't really talking to each other, just basking in each other's presence
and eventually you begin to doze off
at first sunoo was like "baaaaabee!! why did you stop touching my hair"
but then he realized you were asleep
so after givng your cheek a soft peck, and tucking you into the soft blankets
sunoo physically goes >:]
he takes your phone and decides that he's going to spam your personal account
because tbh he does this a lot and it's funny for everyone involved
sunoo takes very silly pictures of you and him
pictures of you sleeping, ones at very silly angles (ik he takes the most FOUL 0.5s)
on your story he posts them with also very ridiculous captions
theres one of you sleeping with the caption "mimimumuimuiu"
another fisheye lens one of sunoo with the caption "hai i stole [name]'s phone 😈"
but he also posts some sweet ones
like one where you're dozing off in his arms w the caption "she's so cute"
sunoo gets mushy at some point
like his captions go from funny to "im so happy that i get to call myself [name]'s boyfriend, i feel so lucky to be with such a beautiful and talented woman"
that's great!
really!
that's wonderful!
but.
there's just one problem
one
teeeeeeensy
weeeeeeeeeensy
problem
he was using the wrong account.
he was posting all this on your official, business, 7.8 million follower, instagram account.
and not your personal account.
!!!!!
😱😱😱
he doesn't notice until 20 minutes later his phone blows up with articles and text messages
and when he notices
sunoos like OH SHIT
he shakes you awake
and poor boy is so apologetic :(
"baby i'm so sorry i didn't mean to out our relationship like that i should have been more careful-"
but when he explains it to you
you kinda just laugh
and go back to sleep
HELP
sunoo deletes the stories but people already screenshotted them
yeah... so this blows up
i feel like they would become memes
like the ones of you sleeping become reaction memes or even worse part of those tiktok meme slides LMAOAOAO
a lot of people think it's adorable
and you do too
but sunoo is so embarrassed
poor boy
he was writing out entire think pieces on your instagram story oml
OH MY GOD I JUST THOUGHT OF SOMETHING TERRIBLE
there's definitely articles that come out about this
and yk how on articles theres a title page with images
one of the images is of you ofc
all these news outlets use your super professional HD MODEL pictures of you
like ones where youre a goddamn SMOKE SHOW, the "who is she?" ones, the ZOOWEE MAMA ones...
and then they use one of the foul images that sunoo takes of himself that are like 3 pixels
like the 0.5 lens ones 😭
nevertheless, there is a happy ending
everyone thinks its so sweet
including you
and when people bring it up on interviews you're able to just laugh about it
<3
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jungwon ☆
we joke abt jay and sunghoon and sunoo having mad side eyes
but i think we forget the FATHER of INSANE SIDE EYES
YANG JUNGWON HIMSELF
you're a singer/artist
and you just released a new EP!
on tiktok, you're making promotional videos to promote your new songs
looking like a cutie, popping off, as you always do!
anyways in many of them
you're in front of a glass door
or a mirror
so as youre being an absolute cutie promoting your song, in the background in the reflection you can see jungwon making faces
NOT BECAUSE HE'S MAKING FACES AT YOU
but bc sometimes there's ppl walking by and being judgy
jungwon is giving them mad stink eyes and it's caught in the reflection of your videos
i don't think a lot of ppl notice it until someone points it out
and when they do
theyre like
WHO TF IS THAT 😭
ppl are making tiktoks simply zooming into his face LMAOAOAO
and then a few days later
the paparazzi released pictures of you walking with jungwon, holding hands and on a date
and when ppl see it
theyre like
hmm...
that guy looks a lot like the guy in the reflection...
and then the dots connect
like sunoo, i think jungwon is embarrassed
everytime someone brings it up jungwon hides his face in your neck
and he wears that cute little bashful grin
but honestly it's cute
so just hug him and kiss his lil cheeks and he'll be okay
it kinda becomes viral on tiktok
so you make a few video stitches about it
you stitched the og video that pointed out jungwon's face in the background
your stitch was just a video of jungwon being embarrassed and freaking out
like bro was on the floor, hands in his hair
jungwon was in the trenches sorry 😭
there's another stitch where jungwon explains himself
he's dressed in a suit and tie and speaking so formally like he was making an apology video or something
"i would like to address a recent clip of me making inappropriate facial expressions-"
"babe you don't need to be so formal, it's a tiktok"
"you shant say that, i must do this for this is my will"
BRO WAS FIGHTING FOR HIS LIFE ☠️☠️☠️
#freejungwon
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riki ☆
youre an actress that's very popular
except some ppl hate you bc they think hating popular people makes them interesting *eye roll*
safe to say.... riki is your NUMBER ONE DEFENDER
like he is the ring leader to all of those [name] stan twt group chats
he's the one leading those discord raids on your hate groups OH MY GOD 😭
he has multiple accounts and he fights every person that dares tarnish your name
twitter is his battlefield and the keyboard is his sword
anyways one day riki is so deep into an internet fight that he GETS DOXXED 😭😭
like it wasn't even graceful
i think he'd make fun of one of your haters
and the hater goes "wanna see something funny? :)"
and BOOM
ADDRESS
IP ADDRESS
FULL NAME
PERSONAL EMAIL
PHONE NUMBER
dont actually dox people guys its not funny
when riki gets doxxed they get his full name right
and the hater, his assailent, and their little posse start searching his name on social media to further dox him
and BOOM #2
THEY FIND HIS INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT
now riki isn't stupid
so his ig acc is private
however.....
the profile picture of his acc is a selfie of you and him kissing
they also did research on him and found out that you and him went to the same high school...
in fact they found miscellaneous pictures posted online of you and him a few years back... holding hands n shit....
OH
SHIT
this goes viral over night
like
its so bad that even news headlines are covering it
"TWITTER USER @[NAME]LUVER1209, HOT ACTRESS [NAME]'S MOST NOTORIOUS INTERNET DEFENDER, IS REVEALED TO BE HER BOYFRIEND 😱😱😱"
i feel like the public's reaction to this would be really light-hearted
like i think mst ppl would be cheering riki on
"he's so real"
"oh my god i think i was mutuals with @[name]luver1209"
"this is what true love looks like"
you have super loyal fans and riki's mutuals so they support you too
except i do think theyd be in shambles, but in good fun
"i just found out [name] has a bf im going to flush myself down a toilet"
"i can't believe she chose @[name]luver1209 when his fancams are so shit... THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!'
"i've been here waiting in line for three years and this random @[name]luver1209 swoops in and takes my woman..."
riki's stan account gains a lot of followers
and so with your permission
he posts a selfie of you and him
probably with a cheeky caption like "KISS MY ASS!!!!"
i feel like people go back and watch old talk show interviews and stuff
and if you zoom in
you'll see riki in the front rows cheering the loudest 😭
bro is everywhere
in the future there's def a moment where like
you're at a live talk show
and the host asks you about the fiasco
and you can literally just point to him in the audience like
"yeah my boyfriend's right there-- hi baby!"
and riki from the audience, behind his phone that he's using to record you like its a fancam, is like "hi baby!" back
i dont think the media even calls him riki, he's stuck as @[name]luver1209 forever
not that he minds
😭😭😭
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hyung ver.
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