#im doing this every year for the next 60 years

[say-sike]

holy shit guys… @oogaboogaspookyman @genesisforreal its our 3rd anniversary… 3 WHAT THE FUCK!!!!! WHERE HAS THE TIME GONE

[daforged]

there’s a lot of things im not enjoying about my life right now but i think the worst one is that i don’t have anything to talk about other than how miserable and tired and unmotivated i am

[eir-trixa]

WOTTG SPOILERS AFTER THE CUT

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Can you believe Rick is validating me in my Percy-is-the-most-empathic-character take? I have legal basis but boi does it feel nice to have canon confirmation.

Second that book was short af I got the gist of it all while reading for like an hour.

Third, we addressed everyone else’s trauma. Percy’s still the group therapist LMAO 😭😭😭

Fourth, my son is such a good kid yall, this is why I lose five years of my life when someone insults or when he insults himself jfc my child.

Im honestly still processing and I have to reread the ending. Did it address Percy’s issues? Im going to go with “a bit” and call it a night. I mean, I guess it did? Percy got to unload and help Gale and Hecuba. We got an insight to how he’s managing to stay up and fighting and good despite all the shit he’s put into. Honestly the fact that he saw the humanity in Gale and Hecuba, that he saw their pain and grief and thats what made them trust him, that is so good. And the way he related to them. Goodness. And it highlights again how good a person he is, how much he feels and cares. I mean, he cried cause he had to send Mrs O Leary away, I cant with this kid-

I supposed what Im left unsatisfied with is how he still perceives himself as dumb? Baby, you survived San Fran for two months as a homeless kid without memories and pursued by different monsters who cant die. Youre the furthest thing from dumb.

He cant see this of course and while it was slightly addressed(?) by Annabeth telling him to his face that she doesnt give him enough credit, that he’s pretty smart, I dont think thats enough for addressing this particular issue. There was a time in the middle that he almost snapped because he thought Annabeth probably thinks him too dumb to know what to do next. Which I understand is frustrating to him. But to be fair this book made him look at Annabeth for a solution a lot. Theres also little comments about how when he cant think of anything - which is every 60 seconds apparently according to him- he looks at Annabeth. This doesnt help the co dependent allegations LMAO. Idk, I will die on the Hill that Percy is one of the smartest people in the series, not just emotionally but also in strategy. And theres, of course, nothing wrong with looking at the genius strategist for answers. Ive mixed feelings because definitely this is more of a Percy-insecurity issue than an Annabeth-being-bossy issue. But okay. One more book, heres to hoping we get more heart to heart on that front because Im 999998% sure she doesnt mean to make him feel stupid, Percy’s just got a lot of demons to fight but this in particular they need to figure out together. Still, its obvious how much they care for each other still. If only Dave and Hana did not piss me off at the start Id probably be a little more lenient about this.

Annabeth’s fatal flaw also makes a comeback, we love to see it.

And Sally Estelle Jackson. Now we have to find out wth is Percy’s middle name cause if Sally has one odds are she gave her son too. Trust me. Im Filipino. Iykyk.

Lastly, while I will forever and ever and ever support the trio from pjotv (theyre perfect and have done nothing wrong ever) I can see Rick’s injecting their personalities into the books. Im not sure if he does this on purpose or just subconsciously LMAO. Some of Grover’s dialogue is definitely inspired by Aryan. Percy being Lanky? Walker through and through, especially with his growth spurt lmao, and Annabeth’s confidence? All Leah. I can see what Rick’s trying to do. Ive no opinion on this, just pointing it out. I do love love love the live action. Just. I can see you Rick. You aint slick.

So there. I probably would need to reread the book properly at some point.

[haveihitanerve]

BUS! I know I came back to land for a reason…

Also- for-word: um. Be prepared? Its not innocent. At all. Not about a bus. Um. yeah. Don't watch around people. Yeah. thats all the advice i can offer. Now go off into the world Penelope Jemima B. D. And show the world who you are 😭

(the amount of distress i had while watching this is insane) anyway:

Idk what AJ and Tom were saying at the very beginning but cuteness 

“You're gonna fucking love it.” Tom is an iconic king but also AJ and Sam laughing at his dumb little jokey intro will always be the cutest thing to me

“Hopefully in that order…” yes please lol

“BUS!” AJ really enjoyed that- gorgeous cackle, 10/10. Sam doesn't know what to do with that and Tom has just reverted to repeating it bc… wow

“First murder.” “last murder” goodness gracious what lmaooo

Toms little pat on AJ’s back as they started the scene 😭

AJ awkwardly scooting away as Sam comes closer but also moving closer because he needs to at all times be touching them 😭

“You don't see young people reading anymore.” Ok idk if its intentional or not but every time we get a scene like this in any way sam always starts insulting young people for being on their “tablets and iphones” and etc etc, and i don't know if its an actual grievance that he has at this point lmao(even tho we as fans connect to them thru this but wtv lol) or if hes mocking old people for their grievances and either one works for me really lol i just wanna knowww

Sam: Good book? AJ: *every book ever created ever in the history of ever leaves his mind* yeah yeah, uh u-yeah uh its the-the the- the sexbook. Yeah thats such a good book AJ, i agree

“Quite a coincidence.” AJ: *blinks, not sure what to do with that information just casually dropped with nothing else* wha-what Sam: *smirks* Tom: *offstage* :D 

Sam: I wrote the sexbook Tom: *oh did you??* *legs crossed, hand over mouth, classic tom pose that slays every. single. time.*

“Arthur big dick” Tom shaking with silent laughter, AJ almost caving with a laugh, Sam laughing as he says it. Idk shared laughter means a lot to me

“Name five of them.” No thats foul- because AJ couldn't even think of one and now you’re making him come up with fivvveee titles sam??? Thats loowwww XD

“Big Dick 1, 2, 3 ,4 and 5.” The groan of the crowd lmaooo- they really wanted to hear AJ come up with creative titles lol

Tom’s disappointed nose pinch in the corner XD

“Im just gonna fangirl here real quick-” yes AJ! Yes! Finally we are represented!!

Sam: You're a girl? *slowly removes his hand from Aj’s shoulders* AJ: *did not think that far ahead, nor that it’d be commented on* ye-yes? Sam: ah.*contemplates* this is much creepier than I thought it was LMAOOOOO (Toms little grin shaky laugh in the corner 🫠)

“I just feel like your writing- it just really gets to the heart of- of the sexual experience.” truly, inspirational work Sam

“Didn't like it.” Silence as AJ just stares at him. :| yes. Do continue. 👀

Tom and AJ’s laugh as Sam just doesn't answer XD

“He-hello?” AJ sounded genuinely concerned for Sam lol

“Where did you go?” “the sea.” regrets it before the words are even out- XD

The way they both broke, shook for a few seconds, and then straightened in sync is insane

Its like a fricking switch was flipped holy shit- laughing- then suddenly sitting upright and focused again lol wow

Toms little giggling in the corner omfg-

“Are you getting off? Whe-where are you getting off?” He heard the joke and immediately corrected lmaooo

“Well, turn to page seven!” “Ahhh!” “Ahhh!!” the whole finger pointing and like “hahahaha i knew you'd say it you shit” is amazing and i adore it

“How old are you?” Has to clarify for the scene, i appreciate it sam lol

“32. How-how-” “okay.” “okay.” yeah maybe its better not to clarify sam’s age- seeing as hes been at sea for 60 years yet was clearly an adult when he wrote the book and- lets not get into it

“Im actually getting off at the next stop-” “mhumhmh” AJ and Tom’s little smiles at his dumbass joke ahhhh i love

Also- side note- his book gets off already at page seven??? Thats pretty early right? Or am i tweaking? Actually its a book about sex called Sexbook so nevermind, ignore me

“Im actually a writer myself.” “oh really? What have you written?” “big vagina 1, 2, 3.” Sam completely folds at that, and Tom’s little smile as AJ smirks, proud of himself ahhh such dorks :) 

“But i haven't- *breaks* i haven't released any yet because *voice shakes with laughter* im too afraid. *sam casually dying in the background trying not to laugh* Im too afraid of showing my work *breaks again* cause i will be judged.” The hand to the heart is truly my favorite thing XD

“Jemima.” Sam: *shit what was my name again* AJ: Arthur B. D. Sam: *thats right thank you* Arthur B. D. WOW!!! AJ remembered a name!!! Brilliant. 

Brilliant stagecraft of leaving the bus AJ, adore

Tom gets to be in a scene now! Yay!

“Boys…” Sam thought he could sit down and relax- nope! AJ is trying, but, yep he has to stand again too lol

Tom unbuttoning his shirt just to reveal a shirt underneath is a power move holy shit-

“As the united kingdom communist part we just cant take that.” Tom squints at him: mmmhmmm. *shakes head because he does not like that* Sam: *does it back equally as passive aggressive* mmmmmhhhmmm

“Us fine upstanding, british *lacking a very substantial british accent* communists that we are.” 

I see Tom is trying to revive Xavier???? Or smth…

“Oh what did you just stutter to me?” His strut-

AJ’s tongue in cheek smile as he approaches-

That chin tilt???????? Oh ma my my-

“How did you get my name so wrong?” ahh how quickly the mighty fall😔

“Magnus o. Puss.” AJ’s almost break at the name lmaooo

“Cause i have a full magnus full of o puss.” Sam’s breaking of character so completely that he just covers his face in shame lmaooo XD

“You just wiped your nose.” “Sorry.” “you're wearing a jumper.” wow tom- just insult everything about him i guess XD AJ: 😔sorry…

Aj trying to escape the scene. Tom: don't just sit down and cry! No mercy…XD

“Flatmate.” “oh!” AJ’s relief lmaooo

Tom: I’m the other flatmate. :/ keep trying buddy, one day you'll join the scene again lmaooo

“Get on the couch.” “how was your day?” “how was your day?” “how was your daaaay?” the way theyre actually sitting really close together with Tom almost leaning against Sam’s shoulder 🫠

“You know, my writing,” “We’re big fans.” Tom casually interrupts to clarify and support- and like- i know its for the scene and they’re building a really quick relationship- but AJ actually is a writer/director and they do actually watch his stuff-😭- anyway-

Sam and Tom’s continuous looks at each other “Oooooooh!”

“Its from your time.” THERE WE GO!!! SOME OLD JOKES!!!! “Oh yeah, just us two 65 year old women with our 32 year old flatmate!” lmaoooo they're all women and not one of them originally meant to be XD

“Well we were five.” “At first it didn't do much for us.” I would hope not Tom, but thanks for clarifying…

“As we matured-” “as we matured-” “Like our bible-” “like our bible-” im loving this casual repetition they have going on, wonderful

“It was spiritual but also exciting.” “like cocaine.” “like cocaine.” Sam would know… and still with the repetitions XD

“That would be convenient to the plot.” I love how Sam feels the need to say this aloud and not just subtly hint at it- because knowing the two idiots he’s on stage with- sorry, chaos demons- they would totally let him try to build it up like that, and then never actually get the plot going in that direction lmaooo

“Oh my gosh.” Sam and Tom both cracking at his gasp- now drum roll, will Aj stick to the plot or is he throwing in a curveball???

“Is it convenient to the plot?” Tom looks like he doesn't want it to be- just to annoy Sam lmaooo

“And i looked out the window temporarily-” *almost breaks* Aj- i love you, but there are more casual ways to let this further the plot, you know that right XD

“Well this sounds perfectly plausible.” After he and Tom just destroyed any way it could be plausible

“You've cracked my code did you?” we get a snippet of Aj’s delightful laughter, beautiful

“Pass the torch up. There you go.” AJ: *finger point of “clever”* lol

“You cant go off again back to sea.” “..okay.” AJ’s break at the easy agreement lol-

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW i did not expect a cute hug scene!!!!!! Yay!!!! 🫠💗

Ok- i will be honest- i really though Aj was going in for a kiss at first- and i kind of believe Sam thought so too with the whole “i always wanted a daughter” to solidify its purely sweet and not romantic just in case aj gets any more ideas lol

Sam’s “oh!” and hunch drop into Big Dick because he thought he was Tom’s assistant??? And not big dick, but here he is again lmaooo

Tom’s little vibrating act made AJ fold and i think its wonderful XD

Tom climbing on a chair because he needs to be taller ofc, classic

“You could look, im not wearing underwear.” Sam, not only looking, but doing the appreciate, yeah head nod is crazy

“Im everything you fear.” AJ interrupting his build up to monologue to snort is priceless

“You were just a lowly intern-” Hang on a fucking minute sam- Tom is how old???? That was 60 years ago- i don't care how young and lowly he was- he was at least a teenager which makes him a seventy something yead old man- y'know what its better not to ask

“Even you couldn't… open it.” Tom freezing in place in an effort not to laugh, Sam’s head hanging in disappointment, and AJ just having the time of his life 

THEM GENUINELY JUST LETTING/MAKING AJ WRITE THE ENDING OF HIS SEX BOOK ON STAGE IS THE BEST AND CRAZIEST THING EVER WHAAAAAAAT

Tom’s little head drop forward like “what are you saying aj? Oh you're doing this? Okaaay…” 

“Penelope.” sam. Sam. sammy. Samuel. Its Jemima. 

“Im trapped in a vagina.” Tom, AJ, and Sam all cracking at the perfectly set up joke, classic

“How is he doing this?” Sam not helping at all and making AJ come up with it XD

“He says it just- hes a ghost.” AJ has given up lmaooo

“Astral penetration.” AJ BREAKING FULLY, FOLD ON STAGE, MID STAGE!!!!

“Magnum o, full stop, puss.” Sam checking his watch to see how much he has to speed this up lmaoooo

“Hell die inside of that vagina.” *both break* XD

“Im in my office on another floor…” Tom really wanted to be in the scene and they keep forcing him out XD

“Hes astral penetrated me-” Sam fully folds on stage too- he knew, he just knew AJ would make it weird- specifically made it so that they were established as daughter-dad relationship- and yet AJ still found a way LMAOOOO

“Don't make me call security.” “Call security! I don't care!” “Security.” “JA. I am secure.” Tom baby im just not sure thats what he meant XD

“Im just going to put this out there: we have several copies.” lmaooo Aj come on!

“But then your friend would die inside wouldn't he?” AJ: *HAHAH FUCK YOU!!!* “ahh fuck.” Sam is impressed lol

WHERE DID HE GET THE SWORD?????

[drenched exit] sam: awww come on! *disappointed as though he didn't help set it up*

[door closes with a moist SMACK] Tom: *smiles because hes proud of himself*

“You've been meditating inside a big member!” why do they keep making it worse better

[juicy splash] Sam: *makes sound of disgust and disappointment*

“Its perfectly natural!” You tell ‘em king!

Physic powers?????

“You-you've pinned it to the wall.” … aj… theres no emoji or anything to convey my expression rn, but i assume its the same as yours so… yeah…

“You must challenge him.” AJ: *breaks fully because he did not expect sam to just appear behind him while hes being tortured?? by a man rubbing his own nipples*

“Feel the tension!” i feel the tension alright😭

Aj having to laugh mid battle (real) because  w h a ha t???

What is going on😭😭😭

OH MY GOD WHAT???? SAM ESCAPED THE VAGINA????

pleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasedontkisspleasekisspleasekiss

“That vagina was so acidic.” Sam please don't say things like that while you're dying in AJ’s arms- XD

“Im so happy i met you on the bus that day.” You mean literally that morning?? Or did i miss a time jump?

“The big vagina 4. *moans*” Death. 

aj helping tom up from the floor😭🫠

AND, SCENE!!! wow. That was… wow. Ok. Um. So. If you couldn't tell, i got very distressed towards the end. Like very. It was very good though, kinda what i expected. I’m sad Luke isn't there but glad he wasn't because it would have been so much worse 😭 but uh. Yeah. that was fun! So… hope you enjoyed???

@snek-of-eden you were so right, the chaos is unmatched and wow. Thank you!!

@dawn-speckled

[its-a-me-mango]

HEY ARTFIGHT IS OVER!!!! YAAAYYYY HIATUS OVER!!!! KINDA!!!! YIPPIEEE!!!!

Ok being fr I had so much fun with Artfight this year, I set out this year with the intention of beating my previous record and I COMPLETELY SMASHED IT!!! INSANE BEHAVIOUR!!!! MY WRIST IS ALL TINGLY IM SURE THATS FIIIINE :3

I'm not gonna be uploading the pieces I did for AF (If I managed to draw you something you're welcome to repost it and tag me, I'll reblog it!) but I thought it'd be fun to put together all the icons I did for each piece to show them all off!

Quite the mix in there, did you know I've been a furry artist for longer than I have been a human one? I think thats fun.

Just wanna say thank you to everyone who took part and who wanted to draw something for me! Y'all are all so amazingly talented and I deeply cherish every single piece that I received. Artfight is my favourite time of year because it means I get to do what I love doing most with my work, so I'm already looking forward to next year, I'll be there next year I prommy.

SO YEA, I'M BACK NOW, MOSTLY!!!! I'm gonna take it slow for a while but I'm back to doing SMG4 content, I AM PLANNING ON FINALLY UPGRADING MY PC THIS MONTH SO I MAY HAVE TO TAKE ANOTHER HIATUS BUT WE'LL SEE HOW THAT GOES!!! PEACE AND LOVE EVERYPONY THANK YOU ALL FOR HANGING ON FOR ME!!!

Rotting real quick thouhg ouhghhg god do you know what 64 pieces does to you??? It hurts, my bones I'm too old for this, I'm like a 60 year old man. /j

[kiefbowl]

i made a string of really dumb financial decisions and now im in debt that might take me years to pay off, do you have any words of wisdom for me queen. like that feels bad. how do i even save up. imagine flushing a pile of money down the toilet thats what this debt it

I know how that feels, believe me. A lot of people do. I'm feeling the pain of my 9 month school loans, and credit cards I had already paid off back "on" again (one in particular is pretty high...whooooops).

Don't lose your cool, I have a couple of flexible suggestions that you take, use, and modify to your specifics:

Tithe yourself - if your job does direct deposit (which most do!), you can direct deposit your money into multiple accounts. Get it set up so your paycheck goes 90% into your checking account, 10% into your savings account so that you're not even thinking about it. You might feel the squeeze for a little bit but you'll acclimate to that "missing" 10% sooner than you think.

Ask for a raise - if you're working, ask for a raise. If you're new, or maybe not that "great", or they're penny-pinchers, or you're just nervous to ask, don't even worry about it. Ask for 3% - this is low, and most jobs will give it to you just for the convenience of getting you to stop bothering them about it (if they can't afford 3%, run run run). For context, if you make $10 an hour, a 3% raise only gives you $12.00 more each week. It's really not much, but not nothing! If you're NOT worried about asking a raise, go all in! Ask for 10%, maybe even 15%. Flex some negotiation skills. Maybe you'll walkaway with 7%, but every penny counts.

Get yourself on auto payments [at the smallest amounts you can] - if you've got credit cards, log in right now and get yourself on auto payments for the smallest amount. If you've got student loans, do the same thing. If you've got utility bills, get them on auto pay. These things take 3 minutes to set up, and there are phone numbers to call if you can't figure it out. These companies WANT you to do this, they will help you get it done.

Work off the smallest amount you owe first [aggressively] - Let's say you have a $60 parking ticket, a credit card you owe $400 on, and three student loans that are currently at $6,000 & $7,000 & $10,000. Forget the student loans right now, you've got them on autopay for the smallest amount you can get away with. First, pay off that $60 parking ticket with your next pay check before it becomes a $200 ticket and a court appearance. Now you can focus on the paying off the $400 aggressively. Your minimum payments will still go off, but every time you get a paycheck, long on and pay an additional amount to the credit card (something you can manage and will also feel good to your brain - $50 feels good when you're thinking of your debit in hundreds for example). Once you've got that paid off, now you can aggressively pay off your $6,000. Don't worry about the other two. Just focus on the smallest amount you owe. Each paycheck, payoff a chunk of your smallest debt. It'll get exciting after awhile, like yes I get paid I can make that credit card even smaller. Gamify it, whatever.

Stop worrying about how long it will all take - Only worry about the smallest amount of debt you owe and how (reasonably) fast you can get that paid off. That $400 credit card, if you can spare $100 each pay check - that's only 4 paychecks. That's not too long, right? That's the way to think of time and debt: how much can you spare each paycheck to pay off your lowest debt.

Ask for help - do not punish yourself by lying to your parents and friends. Tell your friends you can't do fancy dinners because you are paying off debt and can't afford it. Real friends will bring over a pizza to hang with you. Your parents might be willing to send you a check without you asking for it. Don't feel guilty about monetary gifts, just take it. Go to a bank and talk about their consolidation options. Bring a third party so you aren't dazzled by sales pitches. Consolidation loans aren't objectively good or bad, they can be a life saver if they have the right terms that work for you. Don't think it's over your head! Ask as many questions until you understand all your options.

Buy smart, stop suffering - this really should be like 4 different bullet points, but I'm going to be as concise as possible: you'll never get out of debt if you spend your money without purpose, and you'll never get out under the yoke of anxiety that you fucked up if you just squirrel your money away in fear. A lot of people will give you advice that you need to put yourself on a tight, punishing budget. Maybe, but I think those are doomed to fail for most people. And now you feel twice as bad. Don't do that to yourself. Learning the value of $10 is important. So it learning the value of $100, or $1,000. And the best way to learn is to practice buying and using your money - there's a cheap $1,000 and an expensive $10, and you have to learn how much value you are getting out of these amounts for these purchases. If you punish yourself all week, and then allow yourself a "little treat" on Sunday - that doesn't feel worthwhile to me. Those little treats will grow every day. Soon you're stopping at Starbucks every day for "just $10" and your Sunday treat has become a weekly blow out brunch with friends and then week to week you're scrounging to eat Top Ramen and lamenting your dreams are dying. Instead, save money by spending money on things worthwhile that make you budget for them. Go sign up for those yoga classes you want, go sign up for those guitar lessons you want, go sign up for those art lessons you want, whatever it is. Whatever brings value to your life. Your $70 a week yoga membership can now be valued against your $70 week at Starbucks, and as your pockets pinch one hopes you'll choose the yoga over the Starbucks because one hopes that the yoga is serving you better. Or maybe yoga is ass and you want to spend it on Starbucks, at least now you know. Though I recommend your local coffee shop, as Starbucks is a union busting piece of shit corporation :)

[purplebehittindifferent]

Pls tell me you're lying about the next update being the last. I dont want this to go :(

Yes anons this is EXTREMELY BITTERSWEET. The next update being the LAST.

One ending only, for sanity’s sake.

I have you all to thank.

The next update is in the works as we speak, and I’ll announce this more later, while there will be no more comics (of my creation) related to reconnecting, I’m considering doing some exposition fanfics over on Ao3 if you all wanted to have more story,

as in my head- this story will never really end.

Now go say hey on the discord where I broadcast every time I start crying about the last update. :))

And remember! Once reconnecting is over- IM NOT GOIN ANYWHERE

YOU BET ILL STILL BE DROPPING FANART, AND MINI COMICS, YOU CAN BE SURE I WILL COMBUST WHEN DR CH3 COMES OUT, AND ALL OF THE ABOVE BECAUSE THE GRIND STOPS WHEN I DIE!!! AND IVE GOT A GOOD 60 YEARS LEFT IN THESE HANDS

[emnesoi]

FIFTY TO SIXTY THOUGHTS NOW

aaaa scary

ok i will comply but only because now this is a bit instead of just random

fuck i just knocked my phone over while i was taking off my headphones

i should take out the trash

tea is cool they should make more tea

oh right i was getting drunk i totally forgot and i have half a spiked drink at my desk

i wish my teddy bear would sit up well but the ds's between its legs mean it falls over a lot due to how the leg joints work

wow i have three ds's on this desk right now that's weird

my friend left her pocketknife over and i should really give it back to her

it's a really nice pocketknife but i dont wanna use someone else's pocketknife so i should ask her where she got it

fuck coming up with 60 thoughts is hard

i need to take more instant photographs i have one i took of a friend's tsukihi plush on the bulletin board over my desk

why did i say "friend" you know exactly who im talking about

is it weird that i have a bulletin board over my desk

theres a little shelf under that bulletin board and on it i have two 3d prints, one of a marker switch from myst and one that's a lithophane of the cover of the downward spiral by nine inch nails and i think it's interesting that despite the fact that i asked a friend to print the lithophane years before i got a 3d printer you could reasonably assume i printed both of them

wow that was a thought that took way too much time to expalin

theres a lot of guitar maintenance equipment at my desk which is weird cuz i typically do that stuff at my couch rather than here

jesus christ theres too much stuff on my desk

i dont even need this string winder cuz there's a better string winder literally right next to it

i think ive used that tuning pipe like once

theres also an ace ring right next to them and i think that's funny

when i bought this flashlight i was debating whether to get this pretty decent one or a really fancy expensive one and a friend said "get the expensive one and brag about it on r/flashlights" which immediately convinced me to get the pretty decent one

i also have a set of security screwdriver heads at my desk which my dad got for me and i remember him telling me that he went to the hardware store asking for security heads and they scoffed and went "if you could just buy those they wouldn't work" so he went home and bought two sets off the internet and i thought that was funny

i hope you're reading this in the tone of Jory in that one episode of the ten minute power hour where Arin sits him on his lap and painstakingly grills him about his favorite pokemon and it gets really awkward

wow that sounds really weird when i describe it like that

fuck im not even halfway done

if i had a nickel for every thought im gonna post here i would have $3 which isnt very much money

i got a humidifier recently because it's really dry in my room and im not used to anything in here moving besides me so i keep seeing the stream of fog fog out of the corner of my eye and going AH ! INTRUDER !

that's not a bespoke thought for this thread i posted that on a discord server earlier today does that still count

it's annoying how i have to turn off my vpn whenever i try to go on rateyourmusic because it thinks im trying to ddos them or something

i dont even rate my music i just go there to get an overview of what an artist's most liked albums are so i can get into them easier

that's why im getting into current 93 through sleep has his house rather than thunder perfect mind despite the fact that i think literally everyone except rym agrees that thunder perfect mind is better

though now that i look at it they're only 0.01 off so its not like that discrepancy is that weird

with all of the bonus tracks bandcamp has, thunder perfect mind is as long as swans' soundtracks for the blind and i think that's funny

long albums are cool and i should listen to more of them, some of my favorites that ive listened to recently can't fit on a cd

it's funny that "fitting on a cd" is my criterion for "long" when i havent been an active cd collector for quite a while, i guess that just kinda wormed its way into my brain

oh we're getting enough text in this post to make the editor lag that's scary i hope it'll be good for another 23 thoughts

hey 23 is the number of thoughts i had last time i commented on how many thoughts i needed to post

shit, no it wasn't, it was 26, i really should have checked

wow i hope this is interesting to read

how many words is this at this point i need to check

it's 875 as of that last thought not including bullet points, i think that's more than the number of words ive written for my actual writing in the past few weeks

since pages hold around 250 words that means you would need four pages (ceiling) to write as much as i had written by thought 41

will people understand what i mean when i say "ceiling" i hope so

i wonder how many words this will be when im done

i think i can estimate with that other word count

since 41 is roughly 2/3rds of 60, that means that the amount of words this will have at the end will be 875*1.5 which is 1312

holy shit that's the based number

i lied it's 1312.5 i just rounded it down so it would be the based number

wow it's REALLLLY starting to lag now i wonder if the text editor's unoptimizedness is exponential for some reason

at this point im in the 50s and you asked for 50-60 so i could reasonably stop here but i kind of already committed to 60 so i can't really

i wonder if this is what you expected when you sent this ask

probably not but i mean i don't know what else you could have expected, maybe just me brushing this off aloofly

i wish i had more money so i could buy more music

it's kind of weird that i buy music right like whenever i talk about this to people theyre like oh i just use spotify or youtube or whatever but im weird and neurotic and like owning things too much

it is so laggy now that sometimes ill make a typo and then correct it and then only see all of that happen like 10 seconds later

i wonder if it's weird that i can correct typos without actually seeing what i typed like i just Know

oh shit im nearing the end now i gotta make this count

i wonder what "making this count" means in this context like how would i make the final thought "epic" theyre just thoughts this has been a total stream of consciousness it's not really building to anything

kitty nyaaaaan

[wassupmygays]

yap about ur headcanons about the socs pls!!

heheeh okay some misc things about the soc guys that have popped into my head throughout the week (im sorry this is so long)

EDIT: ok ive put it all under the cut bc it got so long but i do yap a little bit about each soc guy so please read hehe :)

Chet

chet and his family moved from california when he was in 3rd grade. his first friend in town was one sodapop curtis on his little league baseball team

his dad is a cop and wants to advance up the ranks, and his mom wants to make sure they keep up their good social standing, so chet was not friends with soda for long

you know those boys in like 5th grade that crack all the dumb jokes, hit all the door frames, and tease every girl "because he likes her"? thats chet and trip

this is inspired by @/sky4cherry iirc but chet does Nawt get attention at home man. his dad is always busy with work and a little mean (yknow how dads are in the 60s) and his mom is always working on the next social function or trying to appease his dad. anyways he is just always at another soc guy's house just to have someone Talk to him

i think he picks up drinking and smoking, and fighting, for a similar reason to bob: he just wants his parents to fucking notice he's doing something wrong. but theyre high enough now in the social and job spaces that they can just wipe any misdemeanors under the rug

i cant decide if chet is an only child, or if he has like 2 siblings that are way older than him. idk

Trip

terrance dipp is The Exasperated older brother ever. bro did Nawt want a little brother sorry melvin.

anyways unfortunately i do think trip is very much a guy's guy. that boy is Not a good boyfriend to marcia unfortunately :(((((( at least by the time we get to their sophomore year/the show

him and chet can not be sat together in class. they will never shut up or stop hitting each other.

chet broke his arm one time in like 6th grade. trip threatens to break it again at least once a month

ive said this before but ill say it again: trip and melvin are just soc steve and ponyboy. trip is so tired of his kid brother being in all his sports and trying to tag along to everything

that being said, he was looking out for melvin so much during the rumble. he knew their mom would kill him if he brought his brother home all beat up, but also he really really didn't want him to get too hurt.

he Always goes to marcia to patch him up after hes been in a fight. (after the rumble though, him and marcia are on the rocks, and hes got melvin to worry about. so he just sneaks melvin home and tries to clean him up before their mom sees. its actually a sweet bonding moment between them i think)

trip lovesssss verbally poking fun at any greaser in school, especially two-bit. after he realizes two-bit likes marcia, his mean jokes become a lot more threatening

(i do love trip i promise i just also think hes kinda a mean guy. you know the kind of rowdy douche bags in high school im talking about. im so sorry ksco and sean jones i promise i love trip kdjfkdjf)

Brill

clark brillstein i'll be so incredibly honest i dont have much in my brain for him :((( i gotta sit and think more

i do think he has one of the better home lives out of the bunch, and hes got his lovely perfect girlfriend, and hes good at sports, and honestly i think he just. gets tired of everyone thinking hes got it so perfect all of the time. i think maybe thats why he likes all the fighting so much

while he is relatively happy with his life rn, hes tired of being doted on like hes perfect. and also sometimes he sees everyone else's lives being so shitty, he feels likes hes got to pick fights to justify him feeling bad about his lot.

Paul

ohhh im gonna have to hold myself back from talking about him forever. he will get his own post at some point aDKFJDKFJK

anyways. paul holden. the messiest and most scared gay kid in the town of tulsa

i think he and bob literally grew up together. like their parents are Old old friends, so paul and bob have always basically been brothers despite a 2/3 ish year age difference (i dont feel like doing the exact math). i think bev's parents are also in this old friend group, so pauls known her forever too

anyways. he was probably the bob of his friend group in his class, which is why nobody really really protested darry being in their group. but i also think that when he was with darry, paul didnt really care about the whole social friend group of things too much.

contrary to popular belief i dont think paul is the friend-group-leader type. idk if that makes sense and i can yap about it more but.

anyways post-darry breakup paul is a fucking mess. hes sad and angry and those fights that darry was always trying to stop feel so damn good. maybe bob and his buddies are on to something, and bob's dad always has a full liquor cabinet

Bob

obviously we know the most about bob and his home life and inner psyche and reasons for fighting and honestly all of it really resonates in my brain. like yea im keeping all of that

bro has charisma to the max. like he has always been the ringleader of the friend group, even in like 4th grade when all the boys started becoming best buddies

he used to be such a mommas boy. before her praise just became so meaningless.

oh ive just had a revelation. he is an angrier and more resigned buddy aldridge from rotpl. his dad is pulling the strings to make sure his precious son is climbing all the right ladders.

the difference here tho is bob realized this earlier, and that started his spiral into fights and drinking and causing problems. he wanted to see what would finally make his dad stop covering and fixing everything for him. he never found that limit

he knows cherry cant stand the drinking, and i do think he does feel bad about ignoring her feelings about it. but his urge to push back against everything and spit in the face of anyone who tries to tell him how he should be just overpowers. and god everything is more fun when hes boozed up

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

dont get me wrong i love the doctor and i enjoy big lore shake-ups or expansions but if you were to give me the show to run right now i think what i would do is make the seasons about the companion's world-shattering life-changing paradigm-shifting character growth/change/corruption

the doctor is 1) too big, and 2) one character. you start running into walls if you keep telling the stories through them (and by telling the stories through them i mean the driving emotional force from season to season being like,,,their emotional journey. hes alone, gallifreys gone, theres rose, loses rose, theres the master, god complex, he doesnt want to lose his companions, he doesnt want to break his companions, he doesnt want to corrupt his companions, gallifreys hidden, theres the master, the entire universe revolves around them. youre literally running into the walls of the universe here. youve reached the end (and if tv show theory is true im interested to see if that means we'll downscale the stakes after we've broken through these fourth walls))

if you make the narrative universe start turning around the companions (again? im not sure how much it did in classic who), then you open up your possibilities for stories youre able to tell bc as opposed to the doctor, you can keep getting actual new characters, who can vary a lot more in every conceivable way (and obviously we are diversifying if im running the show. nationalities, skin colours, religions, (dis)abilities, time periods, ages, and thats just the humans) which means they care about different things, they start in different places, end up in different places, they can have positive or negative character arcs but the point is that it's their emotionality driving where and when the story goes. youre freer bc youre not stuck with this character after their story ends. you dont need to keep the thing functional so the next showrunner still has a relatively stable jumping off point to write this same character we've been using for 60 years

it opens up the universe! we're running into the walls here but have we seen every corner of the universe yet? no! theres so much to explore even on earth even in one time that you'll never run out. we have not run out of stories we just kinda dont have doors to them bc the camera keeps pointing at the doctor instead of on the people around them

like sutekh is great and fun but why does it have to be the doctor fighting them? you know? personally. why does it have to be the doctor. it doesnt. i think the doctor should function more like the tardis in that this odd pilot-ship old married couple is giving our actual protagonists the opportunities for their stories. that we get to see. i love the doctor dont get rid of him but just like, alien him up on the sidelines. dont even rid him of his character arcs, but like, let his slow changes just slightly influence the companions' stories sometimes, instead of the other way around

and i love 13 obviously but it doesnt have to be the doctor with the timeless child story does it? you could change the names, set it somewhere else, and it could be someone else. sure you wouldnt get the whole thing with the master and i wouldnt want to lose that im not saying literally rewrite 13s era im SAYING. you could tell that story through a companion instead of through her

and i think thats the better choice. and thats what i'd be doing if i were given the show

[imoncloud7]

part 4;

prev. | m.list | next

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written portion at the end!!

"god fuckin' damnit." yn sighed as she put her phone down. she was currently in her last lecture of the day, contemplating how she got into this mess. and how all of her friends suddenly knew oikawa tooru. and how he found her twitter and followed it.

yn had met matsukawa issei in their last term during their first year of school, and while they were not too close, they did have one thing in common. they loved to go out. their drunk escapades slowly began to include mattsun's not-boyfriend-but-boyfriend makki, and they all slowly began to get a bit closer.

being that all of their friends were intertwined, it would be a matter of time before they all figured out what was going on between oikawa and yn. their hookups have surprisingly pre-dated all of yn's friendships in college, which have been difficult to come by. being from another country and also an introvert were really big roadblocks.

oikawa never seemed to care about that though. the first night they met, during their first term in their first year, he had approached her at some sort of welcome party an older student was throwing. yn had quickly figured out that he was a chronic flirter, but had enough alcohol in her system to go home with him. which ended up happening every weekend of the first year, and now second year as well. it was nice for yn to have physical contact, as that was hard to come by now having broken up with her ex and being that she had close to no friends in japan. it was a distraction, something that satisfied her needs with no feelings.

these days however, now that he knows more than just her first name and how to please her, it's too complicated. and wildly uncomfortable.

flashback: 1st term, 1st year

"smoking's not a good look on such a pretty face like yours" yn heard behind her on the balcony. the inside was stuffy and the music felt like it was eating her eardrums alive, so she had made her way outside for some peace and quiet. only for it to be disturbed.

"oh yeah? and who are you to have an opinion on that?" the girl looked over her shoulder to see who was behind her. she was met with a pair of chocolate brown eyes and windswept hair to match.

oikawa thinks his heart may have stopped when she turned to look at him. he had seen her inside and thought she was pretty, sure, but out here was a different story. the moonlight caused her e/c eyes to glow, and her hair seemed so much softer out here. his eyes widened a bit and he choked on his words a bit before responding.

"im oikawa. oikawa tooru. and sorry, truthfully i couldn't think of another way to approach you." he walked up towards the edge of the balcony, taking his place to her right. she took a long drag before offering it towards him wordlessly.

"no thanks, i'm an athlete i can't really do that stuff."

"but you're at a party, clearly intoxicated. i wonder what your coach would think of that." she shot back.

"touche. you never told me your name." he chuckled in his response.

"yn."

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notes:

the "smokings not a good look on you" line was actually used on me

i was at a club in singapore and an old man (maybe like 50-60 yrs old) literally started talking to me while i had a cig in my hand like go away u creep im 20

he texted me on whatsapp later abt that like mind ur business

idk why i gave him my number tbh i just wanted to see if hed buy me drinks

anyways i love matsukawa issei (whats new)

little flashback moment to when their whole affair started!!

either the next chapter or the next two chapters shi may go down

[cator99]

I love making phone calls I love sending emails and being overall pleasant to interact with I love looking for solutions and being eager to understand how the world around me operates and to ask people about the role they play in this beautiful world I love being able to tell that other people are excited for any reason at all to strut their shit in this way and I always take notes on how they do it. It's all so funny to me. I am doing this because I am an insane person. I am the best person for the job. I am like the inverse of Jude St Francis. Born in a wet cardboard box doomed fucked in the head and forced to make an accommodation with life BUT I think its cunty and will commit awesomely violent ritual seppuku when my life is at its absolute peak. But yeah I dont get anxiety anymore if I dont like something it I can just thank them for their time and then find a way to leave and literally do anything else no one really cares as long as you do it right and you know like you can just keep looking for better things you literally never know you might turn out to be really passionate about fish mongering and didnt even consider it and it's not always easy but if the alternative is unbearable then fuck it pack a bag and stick your thumb out on the highway and spend 2 hours chatting about life with a fat 60 year old semi truck driver with photos of his happy fatty family plastered over the entirety of his dashboard and who was concerned why some kid was wandering the highway without a jacket and is nothing but totally kind and appropriate towards you which you kind of didnt expect when you hit the road but then you get to the city and go to an orgy party at some xi/xirs apartment who you met while on a psychiatrist-approved leave to attend an LGBT youth summer camp during the tail end of your 4 month stay at a youth mental health/detention facility but you can't stay there because his 40 year old housemate just announced that he's moving to the states and suddenly wouldnt be contributing to next months rent and didn't want to say anything until the night before when his boxes were being actively moved out of the apartment in order to avoid any sort of confrontation and the resulting altercation is heart breaking this 40 year old workig professional gay dude just absolutely betrayed this screwed up teenaged lesbian with no hesitation but maybe the drug fuelled sex parties had something to do with it but im just there stoned watching some tv show about anthropomorphic fast food and xe really did care about me but this was not the time to be pulling some cutesy whimsical runaway shit so we said our goodbyes and xe gave me directions the youth emergency shelter. As far as I was concerned, I was living the dream. This was just the "hard" part. I broke the high score on the ancient tetris machine at the day-shelter and barely ate anything because they relied entirely on donations and for whatever reason nobody thought to donate anything gluten free. I slept in the girls quarters of the cold shelter we were taken to every night, driven in huge vans by the staff at the day shelter. The girls were primarily quiet and didnt want to talk or even look at anyone. Some of the native girls were chill to play board games or watch tv with though. The guys were real rough. Mostly drug addicts. Mostly violent. They were known for treating each other terribly. I was told I could "use whatever rooms or washrooms that align with your gender identity". I told them I'd rather use the room that made me less likely to have me end up raped or my pillow pissed on.

[kakiastro]

Chiron Aries transit: Wounded Identity

2018-2027

I think this gif reflects this transit so well. It’s time to see the beauty in you and heal

We’re not discussing this transit enough because it’s playing a huge role in what’s currently going on.

Chiron is known as the “wounded healer.” It’s the wound that leaves a permanent scar on you. The pain never fully goes away but it can be tolerable. Chiron is also a healer, when you start to heal yourself, you can help others. He’s also a teacher, understanding those wounds and learning from them is healing for you on a soul level.

So how does this affect the collective?

Chiron can teach us and show us where we need to heal as a collective.

It’s been in the sign of Aries for 8 years and the year 2027 will its last until 2077(I’ll be in my 80s🥴😅). Chiron returns every 50 years back to a sign.

Aries is ruled by the warrior planet Mars. It rules our identity, Men, courage, our motivation, sex, the head.

What have we been and needs healing these last 8-9 years as a collective?

-the corrupt power of men and world stage leaders, and the downfall of them is a main theme I’m seeing here. I’m pretty sure this is when the Metoo movement became prominent in our conversations in society as a whole.

-Men/Masc energy folks are being asked to heal those old wounds that’s haunted them all their lives so they can be their best selves.

- women/fem energy folks are finding a courage and level of independence they never knew they had before.

-every single soul here is currently having an identity crisis and asking themselves “who tf am I? I know what I’ve been taught or what I’ve been who I should be, but is this really me?”

-standing up for yourself when you didn’t have bravery to before.

-lack of motivation is another theme.

Those who are going through there Chiron Return (gen x) those born in the late 60s & early 70s are really going through this. It’s the midlife crises of the self. Aries is the baby of the zodiac so that’s people are trying to relieve some sort of lost youth that they had.

Example : Leonardo DiCaprio-Chiron Aries 7h. His relationship wounds have been in the spotlight more than his movies. He has a problem with serious relationship commitment “hence him dating young non committal women”, he’s stuck in his 90s it boy youth days. I’m not saying needs to act old or anything but maturity and surrounding himself with mature (adults his age) is a big theme for him.

You know, the pandemic is also apart of this storyline. We were at home by ourselves(Aries). Life stopped and we had to face the music within ourselves.

-Anger and frustration is also a huge thing we are healing through. How we express this emotion in a healthy way. There’s lots of things to be currently angry about but Chiron is asking us “are you going to let it consume you in hurt and destruction or use it to light the inspiration flame inside you? Your choice.”

Ive always felt Aries and Scorpio chirons are the most intense because it’s Mars energy Mars is deep, intense, passionate. Scorpio is also ruled by Mars(if you didn’t know)

- with the NN Aries & eclipse Aries, this Wounded and healing energy is going to be more prevalent now than before. Neptune enters this sign next year, you’ll be asking “who am I, body and soul?”

We are in the “time to face the music and heal era” are you doing the work?

So as we move through these next few years of this transit, think on how much growth you’ve done since 2018. The person you are now in 2024 won’t even be the same person in 2027. Document everything because this is how you see astrology work in real time.

Im open for readings!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for calling my father a cheater?

This is not a serious serious topic like others I've seen here but I need to know if I was justified or just an ass

Me (20s) and my father (60s) got a Jeopardy calender last uear5. Each day it asks a question and you put a guess, you get it right you gain points ("money") if wrong you lose that- essentially just how Jeopardy is. Its a one a day calendar for the full year

Well, each Sunday is a "Double Jeopardy" and you make a bid based on the amount you have. At the start me and my father both wrote down our total amount and how much we made that week, we did this independently. I distinctly remember asking him after that first week how we were betting, and after a discussion we agreed to bet each week what we made (for example, let's say the second week i made 3,000 but my total overall would be 6,000, I would only be able to bet up to 3,000)

Halfway through i have a distinct memory of asking him again how we were doing it, because we were close, but he was ahead. I felt confident on the topic and he wasn't as much. I asked "when you bet, do you bet from the total or from how much you made that week?" He said he never bets over what he made that week and that we only went by what we made. Because of that, I didn't pass him.

About two weeks ago he made a mistake and lost points because he misread a question and I got every question right that week. I got ahead of him by a few thousand.

Even though today isn't the last day of the year, he wanted to do the question because we wouldn't see each other. I agreed even though I was tired and had worked all day

Me, my father, and mother were sitting around their living room as I was visiting. I pulled the calendar out of my purse (its a pocket-sized, about the size of a small notepad, it isnt a calendar you hang on the wall lol).

I said I might as well bet it all, go all in. He asked me my full amount and I told him, he told me his- i was ahead by 2000. I said, again, well i can only do the 3000, so might as well go all in. My mother, who hasn't been involved, simply said don't bet a lot because you want to maintain a lead.

Well I bet the full 3,000 and got the question right! However, my father bet an amount he DID NOT make in the week NOR what you could make in the week. We both got the question right, so now he's thousands ahead.

I claimed that wasn't correct or how we had been doing it. He claims "you said all in, I thought you meant your total amount" I stated "no, I said the full 3,000 I had made first off, second off we've never bet from our total if we had I would have bet more on this". He is now claiming that only *I* was going by that, he wasn't, but that he had never bet more then what he had made that week so it didn't pertain to him to do that. He claims that *i* said I would be doing that, but he "didn't realize" we both were.

I told him we discussed this multiple times and he did agree that we had discussed it. Anyways, he is claiming he is the winner cause he has more now, and is bragging. I called him a cheater and am a bit frustrated. I didnt raise my voice, didnt curse, I only said "yeah but you're a cheater, you cheated so it isn't a real win" with a slight edge to my voice. To which he got upset and rose his voice and called me a sore loser and told me to stop being an ass. I didnt respond and so He says "well we will both follow that rule next year, you can win next year" EVEN though we BOTH followed the rule this year.

My mother didn't know about those conversations and said she wasn't sure what j meant when I said all in, she assumed I meant my full amount but she did hear me say 3000 is all I can bet im all in, and she didn't know why when I had a total amount larger then that

This frustrates me because when he's been ahead of me in points he makes digs at me, and when I do well he dismisses it. He makes jokes about how I'm not good at geography and there are a lot of geographic question (jokes on him, the final question of the year was a geography question and I knew it).

I wouldn't be upset if I had gotten the question wrong, but I got it right and SHOULD have won. In my mind, I DID win, but he is saying I don't have more points so I didnt win.

Like I said, I know this isn't like a serious life or death situation, but it actually does matter to me because idk if I'm blowing it out of proportion or not. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[nowoyas]

koi no yokan 32: damage control (nishinoya yuu/reader)

First - Prev - Next - M.list 1-30 - M.list 30-60 - Ao3

A/N: yeah if you saw me write "coming next year" and didn't expect me to pull this idk what you were thinking lmao. happy new year here's some koiny to go with your vespertine update!

Summary: News travels fast.

Warnings and tags: Blink-and-you'll-miss-it suicide ideation

Words: 2600

[name] to Fukurodani Group Managers!!! at 16:16

[name]: hi

[name]: I need a council

~

Kiyoko to Fukurodani Group Managers!!! at 18:05

Kiyoko: does this have anything to do with the fact that you and nishinoya haven't been talking for the past week?

Yukie: WHAT

Yukie: WHAT HAPPENED WITH CUTE LIBERO BF

[name]: I cannot beg you more emphatically to not call him my boyfriend right now

Mako: what happened???

Yachi: something's been going on with them recently, but [surname]-chan hasn't really wanted to talk about it

[name]: please

[name]: focus

[name]: I maybe got an actual boyfriend

Eri: you WHAT

Eri: clarification. NOT the libero???

Kiyoko: omfg

Kiyoko: is this why you haven't been talking?

[name]: no

[name]: not like. directly anyway.

[name]: the boyfriend was today after I left practice

Yukie: is he cute

[name]: he's ok i guess

[name]: I dont. know. how i got here

Eri: wait so if you're this like. lukewarm about actual bf. why are you dating him??

[name]: I dont KNOW!

[name]: he asked and I panicked and I'm trying to figure out how tf i got here and im spiraling

[name]: noya doesnt need this right now

[name]: i keep trying to get myself to text asuka-san and tell him im soryy i dont know why i said yes and i cant do it but every time i try i just fully blank

[name]: he was like. an acquaintance maybe a friend

[name]: hes kinda the only person ive been able to talk to since stuff started happening with noya

[name]: uh no offense yacchan + shimizu-senpai

[name]: just like. the only one not somehow involved with the club and who didn't know noya and who could just like. listen from outside.

[name]: i guess he's nice???

[name]: he plays baseball

Mako: the fact that you're not excited about the new boyfriend and the only thing you're worried about is libero boy is a really good sign that you are not in the right relationship

[name]: ive had like three panic attacks since i texted earlier and i think i might have another here in a second

[name]: you know what's funny?

[name]: hes a catcher. he's basically just a fucking. baseball libero bc my life is a joke

Kaori: ok i'm here now. what the fuck

Kaori: break up with baseball boy

Kaori: but also we're missing key context here. why were you not talking to libero?

[name]: its so stupid

[name]: he's been going through some stuff recently

[name]: so we were like. eating lunch together. bc I figured the other guys wouldn't question it if he dipped on them to eat with me and he really needed to like. stop pretending to be okay for five minutes and just breathe

[name]: it actually concerns me how good he is at making people think nothing is wrong. i don't think i would have noticed if i didn't know already

Yachi: wait soimething happened???

Yachi: *something

[name]: the story's not really my place to talk about. also i only know like half of it. please also do not mention this part to anyone else for obvious reasons.

[name]: and like. we were having fun and things were good. he was flirting which he does and almost kinda seeming like things WEREN'T blowing up and it was FUN

[name]: and then asuka-san (baseball) shows up looking for me. something about fucking… idk notes or something. we'd been sharing notes from time to time because i felt bad bothering everyone else for notes and i'm only just finally getting my brain completely back from the concussion so I'm basically useless for morning classes

[name]: noya flips out. does that whole protective glaring and growling thing. but it's sorta different when it's someone I know who's literally just trying to keep his science grade up.

[name]: i guess I probably missed some context bc he tried to just like. sit with us after I told him it wasn't a good time and ofc noya's like. hell no.

[name]: asuka-san leaves and he's obviously annoyed and now noya's telling me about how he apparently already KNOWS about him bc his SISTER checked up on him and I shouldn't hang out with him and like

[name]: in hindsight asuka-san was definitely only talking to me because he wanted to go out with me. but??? don't tell me who I can be friends with??? so I told noya he was overstepping and not to do that shit and then we just. stopped talking.

[name]: next thing I know he's canceling on hangouts we already had scheduled and shit starts going bad totally separately and now THIS and

[name]: i dont know what to do

Kiyoko: I think you kinda do?

Yachi: ^

[name]: no but like

[name]: Ive never felt uncomfy with silence with noya before

Kiyoko: no offense I swear but has he EVER been silent off the court???

[name]: he's different when it's just us.

[name]: like… deeply different

[name]: i think maybe if he acted around other people the way he is when it's just us other people would see the appeal immediately and I wouldn't have to worry about this bc he'd have a prettier partner who absolutely adores him

[name]: that aside i don't think i should have to apologize for telling him not to tell me who i can be friends with or talk to

[name]: but this is ripping me the fuck apart

Yachi: yeah, you've been… really obviously not okay this past week

Yachi: sorry

Kiyoko: you should tell him that and tell this asuka guy that you made a mistake

Kiyoko: I keep telling you that nishinoya's different around you and you clearly already know that? he's in love with you and the way you are around him is really telling of the fact that you've got SOME kind of feelings for him

Eri: the guy I saw with you was like. insanely sweet and caring yknow?

Eri: I don't know many guys who'd be that gentle. Our guys are nice but there's nice and then there's… that

Yukie: I have spent my entire life searching for a guy who will hand feed me when I'm not feeling well and that one just did it unprompted

Kaori: I can confirm that that's Yuki-chan's dream

Mako: break up with baseball boy it's not too late

[name]: see but all that's just it!

[name]: this stupid fight aside senpai's basically like. perfect

[name]: he's too perfect for me to ever date him

[name]: someone always has to leave first

[name]: asuka-san's… safe

[name]: whenever that blows up in my face I can survive it

[name]: do you have any idea what it would do to me if I actually got together with senpai and he changed his mind? If he DIED???

[name]: I've watched my dad live in hell for the past two years because the love of his life died

[name]: I'VE lived in hell for the past two years because she died

Yachi: [surname]-chan…

[name]: do you have any idea how close I am to not being able to take it anymore

[name]: if I lost senpai it'd push me over the edge so it's better that I never have him to begin with

[name]: maybe… this is good?

Mako: NO

Kiyoko: first of all I'm sorry about your mom (?) that's horrible

Kiyoko: second of all that is insane logic

Eri: I can't read suddenly

Eri: for a second I thought you just implied that libero is the love of your life and that's why you can't date him

Kaori: addition to insane behavior: "I can't date this guy because I like him too much so instead I'm going to date this guy I don't like that much because I'm planning for all my relationships to fall apart"

[name]: do you know how relationships work

[name]: there's only so many possible endings

[name]: we date and either one of us dies or we break up or we get married and THEN one of us dies or we break up

[name]: no other possible endings. someone always loses someone.

[name]: this is safe and it's good probably

[name]: it'll hurt a lot but it'd hurt more later so

Yachi: why did you ask for a council if you weren't going to listen to what we had to say??

Yachi: omg that came out totaly ewrong I'm sorry

Yachi: *totally **wrong

Yachi: …[surname]-chan?

~

Lunchtime comes and you barely register it. You've spent the day feeling nauseous. Far too nauseous to eat, at any rate. You stare out the window, mentally calculating the distance to the ground. Yachi tried to talk to you once or twice all day, including an apology for something she said in the group chat last night, but you'd shrugged it off. The good news is, you're starting to feel numb.

The bad news comes in the form of a pretty girl's thighs resting on your desk in the corner of your vision.

Satsuki found out fast.

"You wanna tell me why the fuck Hitomi-chan's telling me you got a boyfriend?"

"Genuinely, I do not know who Hitomi-chan is," you reply dully, unable to look at her.

"Asuka's older sister."

"Oh." You shrug. "Probably because I've lost control of my life."

A hand grabs your jaw roughly, jerks you to look into Satsuki's eyes. She softens a little as you stare back at her. "Why are you going out with him?"

"I don't know."

"You realize that Yuu's going to be completely heartbroken?"

You barely manage a nod. "I kept telling him something like this would happen. He refused to listen."

"You could have just told the guy you didn't want to go out with him."

"Sometimes I know something's going to hurt me and everyone I care about and I do it anyway because, quite genuinely, I am not in control."

"Okay, so break up with Asuka."

You shrug. "I think it's safer like this. Noya—Nishinoya would leave me completely destroyed if we ever dated and it didn't work out."

"Oh, don't you start dropping nicknames now, missy."

Another shrug.

"I get you've been through some shit, but—I mean, come on, [name]-chan. Who are you protecting, here? You look like shit."

"I also feel like shit. It gets worse before it gets better."

"So what's the fucking point?"

"You seem really determined to figure out why I'm self-destructing and ruining my life. I think you'd probably need a psych degree to get anywhere productive, though."

Satsuki's eyes narrow. "I'm determined to figure out why you spent a month literally sleeping in my little brother's arms and then started dating some messy baseball player instead."

You could do without the broadcasting. You don't have much energy to try to stop it. "Messy?"

"Three girls last year alone. I tracked them down. Two of them were at the same time, [name]-chan. Even setting aside my obvious bias, he doesn't exactly have a good track record."

…eh. You don't deserve much better.

"…just… look after your brother for me, okay? I know the timing is rough for him, and I'm sorry about that."

"I should fucking hit you for this."

"Do it," you reply with another shrug. "Send me out that window while you're at it."

"[name]-chan."

"Consider all this doing him a favor. I'm fundamentally broken. He deserves someone who can actually be there for him."

"You—augh!" She slams her fist on the desk hard enough to jolt it before hopping off. "I don't know why you're so convinced you're some horrible person who doesn't deserve to be happy, but you need to stop dragging other people into it. Text me when you want to come to your fucking senses."

~

Satsuki to Yuu at 12:52

Satsuki: where are you?

Yuu: why?

Satsuki: where are you

Yuu: 2-4. I'm bothering chikara

Satsuki: stay there. I'm gonna come find you

Yuu: ?

~

"Alright, spill."

Yuu fights the urge to sigh. "Hi, Satsuki. Do I get context now?"

"What happened between the two of you?"

He shrugs. Avoids eye contact. "Can we do this later?"

"No, we can't, and don't shrug at me." Satsuki slams a hand on the desk. "Why is she dating him?"

His blood ices in an instant. Beside him, Ryuu chokes on his lunch. "What?"

"Why. Is she. Dating him."

"Since when? Who said—"

"According to baseball bitch's sister, and as of yesterday."

…shit. He really did fuck this one up.

"What happened between you two? You were fucking glued at the hip before last week, and I know it's not because of the thing."

"I don't wanna talk about it," Yuu mumbles. His voice doesn't really sound like his suddenly.

"Too bad. Talk about it."

"N-Nishinoya-san, maybe you should—"

Satsuki glares harshly at Hisashi. "We're talking. Unless you have insight on the situation, I don't want to hear it."

"We're not talking."

"I talked to her to confirm before I came here, Yuu. She looks fucking miserable. You know what she said when I tried to get answers?"

He's not sure he can handle it. "Don't, Nee-san."

She glares something awful. A lesser man might not have been able to handle it, but Yuu's known Satsuki his whole life and can probably take it if she hits him. He'd probably deserve it, too.

"Fine. But you're coming home tonight, you're not staying at practice obscenely late, and you're talking to us. And if you try to skip out—it's hair night, by the way, so good luck walking around with your hair all fucked up for the next few months if you skip—I'm showing up in that gym and dragging you home. Got it?"

"Sure."

She storms out in a huff. Later, when he's had the time to take it in, he'll probably be angry. Probably break something. Probably snap when Satsuki inevitably drags the story out of him.

For now, Yuu tunes out the world. Ignores the questions from the other second years. Shrugs it off when Tsukishima, of all people, asks him about it before practice. Wades through the day.

~

Noya to [name] at 13:04

Noya: did you seriously start going out with that guy?

Noya: tell me this is one of your tests

[name]: im so sorry [message not sent]

~

The guys know by the end of the day.

Based on the timing of the text you got earlier, you assume Satsuki told Noya and perhaps the other guys, not that you need to know the flow of information. If Satsuki hadn't, Tsukishima and Yamaguchi could have heard from Asuka in class. Yachi or Shimizu could have mentioned it to Noya or to one of the other guys, who would have passed it on. No matter how it happened, the fact is that the guys are looking at you differently now.

You're a heartbreaker, you guess.

There's questions in their eyes. Noya, on the other hand, won't even look at you. You keep your head down and pretend like you're fine. You're not letting relationship drama get in the way of your work as a manager.

You told Noya a thousand times that he'd get hurt chasing you. Maybe now he'll actually believe you.

~

Asuka to [name] at 20:20

Asuka: do you wanna go on a date next weekend? I'd like to take you out if you're down

~

[name] to Asuka at 20:42

[name]: i cant do this [message not sent]

[name]: i'd love to! :) let me know when

Tags: @deeplightgarden @idonthaveanameideayet @dusstory @kazunish

[blueskittlesart]

how do u play zelda games... or are u just very familiar w the lore without having played all of them? i only have a switch and have played botw and totk it's the only console i've ever had and i'd like to play more games like ocarina of time and wind waker and majoras mask but idk how to access them and also. expensive 😭

i've played every game I talk about on here! I try not to talk about ones i havent played bc i don't have a full understanding of them lol. for me it's been about 10 years since I started playing zelda games so I've had some time to get this many under my belt but I can definitely recommend some good games & methods for new players!

since you said you only have a switch, i'll start with legal ways to get older zelda games on the switch. many of these will be expensive and arent actually the method i recommend to play them but. for the sake of being thorough. im gonna mention them.

skyward sword HD remake (highly recommend!!) this game would probably be a pretty good starting point after botw and the remake is notably easier to play than the original. it is $60 tho when the original game was $30. so

NES and SNES virtual consoles which are free with a nintendo online subscription have the original zelda, zelda II, and a link to the past on them. as a new player i wouldnt SUPER recommend any of these but alttp is definitely worth it if you DO end up liking some of the more modern games in the series.

the dreaded n64 virtual console has oot on it but im just straight up gonna tell you not to buy that shit. oot is a must play but there are millions of better ways to play it

the fucking $60 links awakening remaster. don't buy this

the way I personally played most of my games is either via console or hacked console. if you're willing to invest in a secondhand wii to hack you can emulate basically any console that came before it, including the n64 for oot and the gamecube for wind waker. if you're willing to invest in OR you have an old 3ds lying around (preferably that hasnt been updated recently but you can get around that) you can hack it to play GB/GBA/DS/3DS games, which includes link's awakening, minish cap, albw, oot 3d, and majora's mask 3d!

if you're looking for a COMPLETELY free option, my next suggestion is emulation. you want a decent PC to be able to run most of this shit without speed drops, and some newer consoles won't run perfectly no matter what. wii games especially are really dicey because of their reliance on motion control so there's not a lot of emulators out there for them.

for anything before the N64 (majora & any game released before it) I recommend the MAME vintage game emulator. this thing was originally built for arcade games but runs a lot of vintage consoles pretty well too and is generally intuitive and user-friendly.

Visual Boy Advance is a good option for GBA games (link's awakening, 4 swords, minish cap, oracle games.) these may also work on MAME

Desmume for DS games (phantom hourgass, spirit tracks)

Citra for 3DS games (requires high processing speed & decent graphics card, most laptops will not run it) (oot & mm 3d, albw)

for gamecube (wind waker) I used dolphin emulator on my hacked wii so I can't vouch for how it'll run on anything else but i believe it should also be able to emulate wii games? (sksw, tp)

hope this helps fuel your loz adventures! if you ever have specific questions about emulation or hacking i might be able to help also lol i hate paying for games so i do this a lot