#im a terrible fruit
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nyormilt · 2 years ago
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sorry, i just meant to make a little batter doodle and got… distracted… ^^; i cleaned up the sketch some, and then just totally… skirts, man. skirt, man. man in skirt.
. um, what was i talking about…? it rained today, i’m in a mood…
(hey, by the way, the outfit looks familiar for some reason, but i didn’t draw it with anyone specific in mind… is it Velma���s outfit?? from scooby-doo?? im losing brain matter by the second…)
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shotsofsalvation · 10 months ago
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the best type of idkparx crumbs
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songofstrawhats · 1 year ago
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Whenever fics specifically mention Nami or Sanji buying citrus at port I'm just like.....
That's why they have the tangerine trees???? Tangerines are very much citrus!! They will keep you from getting scurvy!! Like I appreciate the realism but the tangerine trees are very much right there!!!
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solcarow · 10 months ago
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historicalclaptrap · 2 months ago
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what are your top 3 hetalia India headcanons ? :>
ooooo tough one...I think if i had to pick just 3:
He/they/she love animals. Adores them, picks up and feeds strays, rehabilitates wild animals, the whole shebang. India has had so many pets of their life time that its litterally uncountable, but he has an especially big soft spot for cats.
Ashoka the Great completely rewrote Indias perspective on morality- famously coming to power through mass slaughter only to see the error of his ways and swear himself to non-violence? Revolutionary. Ashokas sign is still on the Indian flag to this day.
India, though they dont like fighting, are still pretty competant at it. You dont live for thousands of years wandering between several dozens of waring kingdoms without picking up some solid self defence. Still, theyre more a scholar and a carer than a fighter, and honestly find most of their 'job' (prior to the Raj) in being a diplomat and a peace broker for whatever side theyve throw n their lot in with this time.....
And a forth hust for fun:
India has terrible taste in men. Just the worst. People ask them for their advice on everything EXCEPT romance because yes they may be (comparitively) wise and sensible, but they are also inexorably drawn to a string of the most socially terrible men on the globe and literally no one understands why
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6kate1bishop6 · 2 months ago
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eating a bunch of grapes and enjoying it like are you perhaps a small animal or a type of bird
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foxstens · 10 months ago
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i hate tomatoes
except for when i don't
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dark-konohagakure2 · 6 months ago
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Helloooo! This is my first time requesting something like this so im super nervous .. but do you think you could write something along the lines of madara niece getting married of to him and them consummating (getting freaky deaky) the wedding? Its okay if not, i love your work! ^_^
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tw: incest, uncle/niece, noncon, forced marriage, age difference, misogyny, breeding, size difference, cumflation
All characters depicted are 18+
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Madara doesn't care about romance in the slightest, much less marriage. He can appreciate taking a woman's body as a spoil of war, but other than that he couldn't care less about such tedious distractions such as women. But as little thought as he puts into the matter, the fact remains that Madara will need an heir soon as head of the Uchiha Clan, and there is only one suitable candidate for birthing his sons.
Madara isn't incredibly close with his niece, he doesn't hate her, but he isn't exactly a doting uncle either. Most of his memories of his niece are of her as a small and meek thing, hiding behind her father Izuna's leg and clinging to her mother's skirt, but now that she's grown older, she has become an attractive young woman, the spitting image of her late father, his precious younger brother, so Madara decides to kill two birds with one stone.
Forcing her hand in marriage is almost top easy, the girl's mother has been in disarray since her husband's death, so the woman sees her only daughter getting married as a good thing for the clan. Even if Madara is the girl's uncle, he is without a doubt the most suitable male for her out of every man in the Uchiha clan, or at least that's the point he'll hammer in.
His niece isn't terribly happy when she receives the news that she'll be getting married, what's worse is that she gets this shocking news at the very last minute, as Madara doesn't even think to tell her about their unconventional 'engagement' until the very day right before their so-called wedding, and he definitely won't be sympathetic to her hysterical woman tears.
"Enough or your shrieking, girl. I've already made my decision and it is final. If you can't even do something as simple as rearing a few children for our clan, then you don't deserve to be called an Uchiha."
The wedding isn't exactly a large one, it'd just the two of them, not even the mother is allowed to attend her own daughter's 'wedding', Madara doesn't need two crying women ruining his special day. The wedding kimono suits his adorably homely niece rather well, but Madara thinks it would suit her much better on his bed, so suffice to say that the marriage ceremony will be rather quick.
Once it's finally done, Madara will practically drag her to his chambers, his cock unbearably hard beneath his wedding robe, he never thought he'd ever be so excited about sinking his cock into a wet cunt, but his niece's tight little Uchiha pussy is just too much of a tempting forbidden fruit for him to resist sinking his teeth into. While his main goal is reproduction, Madara will also be after his own pleasure during this act of consummation.
Madara's cock is long and thick, stretching her virgin walls before he then gets it halfway inside, and when he finally rams his thick meat into her, his leaking tip will immediately and mercilessly bash into her cervix like a battering ram, it would be next to impossible for her to get thoroughly knocked up due to how deeply Madara is penetrating her fertile cunt.
Madara doesn't take any half measures, he wants her swollen with his seed, with his offspring, and he's not going to achieve that by just one measly orgasm inside of her, he's going to cum inside of her as much as possible, fucking his superior seed into her until her flat tummy becomes bloated with the sheer amount of cum that Madara has dumped into her, and even then he's not going to stop enjoying his niece-wife for quite some time.
"Stupid girl, don't pass out on me just yet, weakling. It's only been four rounds and you're already whining and leaking? Pathetic. How did I get burdened with such a weak niece..?"
Madara's opinion on sex won't change too much even after having his way with his new 'wife', but now he's able reach a conclusion; he doesn't have any need for other women and their holes now, since his niece is the only set of holes Madara can imagine himself using for the foreseeable future.
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ozzgin · 9 months ago
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IM SORRY, but I need a whole smut fanfic with yandere ASMRtist where he just straight up fucks reader and posts it, and people like it
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Even better if it was an accident! Although let me add a little disclaimer that this concept turned more BDSM-oriented than I initially planned, but it has no correlation whatsoever to ASMR. Just wanted to point it out because the community already struggles with the sexualization of content. The guy just happens to be kinky. Content: gender neutral reader, male yandere, NSFW, BDSM themes (bondage, spanking, collaring, name-calling)
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He’s doing his usual sound recording, yet today it a little different. You're particularly cheeky, kneeling before him, back arched and bottom up. The pillow is soaked with your drool, lips forcefully parted by a bit gag. You're a mess.
Today, he's particularly aroused by your hooded eyes and damp skin. No harm in taking a break from his work, is there? His hand lands another rough spank, followed by his fingers tracing across your privacy. It seems he isn't the only one terribly pent up.
He gives you a little encouraging jolt before clarifying with a spoken order: "Spread."
You obediently follow his instructions, eager to be touched by more than his hand. He grins at your visible excitement.
"My, what a greedy whore you're being today. You're still red and swollen from the spanking, are you sure you want me to do even more damage?"
He presses himself into you as if to prove his point, though the feeling of his throbbing erection really only makes matters worse. You nod desperately and groan.
Once he's done pounding the life out of you, he stands up nonchalantly and dusts off his hands, gazing at his masterpiece: you're sprawled onto the mattress, heaving, dripping with his seed. Another fruitful day of pleasing his Darling.
He quickly finishes the last retouches of the recorded ASMR session and uploads it to his channel, distracted by the thought of a potential second round.
"Don't get up", he demands from his chair. "I'm not done with you yet." Judging by your expression, however, it's not likely you had any other intention to begin with.
Later in the evening, he idly checks his phone, somewhat surprised by the sudden influx of views and comments.
"Wow, this is probably your longest video so far. You're spoiling us", someone writes.
"What's the stuff at the end? Sounds bizarrely wet, yet tingly", someone else wonders.
His smile abruptly pales as it dawns of him: he never stopped recording. In a moment of anger, he throws his phone into the nearest wall, and you stumble over, startled by the commotion.
Damn it! That was his special moment. He feels like he'd just fucked you before the masses. His precious time - meant to be savored - has been tainted by the ears of plebeians.
He marches towards the bedroom, pulling you after him by the little house collar you must wear inside. No matter, he tells himself frantically, he'll just have to redo it. He'll fuck you even better this time, and it'll be for him only.
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[Yandere!ASMRtist Concept] | [More yandere works]
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luffington · 9 months ago
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OMG im obsessed with the fic with Cora and Doffy X Reader! i was wondering if i could request just Corazon X Reader? im absolutely crazy about the idea of sweet Cora having those repressed sadistic urges, and his struggle with wanting to be soft and kind, but cant help liking the darker and meaner, its just. UGH SO GOOD
Maybe the reader could have picked up on that a bit and is teasing him into giving in to those urges (which they're totally into lol)
Also i love your fics sm! keep up the great work <3
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✧.* art credit!
➤ pairing: donquixote rosinante (corazon) x gn!reader
➤ word count: 1.3k
➤ warnings: dom!corazon, possessive!corazon, dacryphilia, oral (m receiving), praise kink, established relationship, fem reader
RIGHT ITS SUCH A GOOD CONCEPT!!! we barely know anything about cora outside of what law experienced and we'll probably never find out more so.... character interpretation!
my first draft of this had a paragraph where the reader acted bratty to try to coax out his mean side and he almost starting crying.... i took it out because i couldn't do that to him (ㅠ‸ㅠ)
this ended up being pretty similar to the other fic (read here) but i hope you like it!
NSFW under the break! minors dni thank uuu
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Corazon was the sweetest man you’d ever met. Sure, he was a master of deception – hiding his Devil Fruit powers and tricking his brother into trusting him was definitely not an easy feat. His anger issues could use some work, even though the reasons behind his outrage were always justified. But his loving personality and strong sense of morality were very real.
He never doubted your kind heart, either. You had joined the Donquixote Family simply because you had no other options, and dealing with his crazy older brother was better than starving on the streets. Corazon was able to relax around you, be silly and affectionate without being judged by his cold-hearted coworkers, and finally speak after long stretches of staying silent.
But there was more to him.
Doflamingo seemed to be the black sheep based on what little you knew about the biological Donquixotes. A rare case of madness in an otherwise well-intentioned family. However, the brothers still shared the same genes and the same horrific childhood. And even though Corazon never discussed his experiences in the Navy, he certainly witnessed terrible things that still weighed on his mind.
Your boyfriend tried his best to keep any deep-rooted darkness away from you, but it was unhealthy for him to repress every negative emotion. You wanted him to feel comfortable around you. He didn’t need to be an angel all the time.
One time, the eternally clumsy blonde almost fell trying to hover above you in bed. Not wanting to crush you with his ten-foot tall body, he caught himself by grabbing your arm. Hard. You squeaked in surprise and he immediately apologized, but dark blue fingerprint-shaped bruises stained your skin by the end of the night.
Early the next morning, when he thought you were still asleep, he lightly traced the marks over and over. You caught him staring at them throughout the day, too, looking more intrigued than upset. He littered your neck, chest, and thighs with hickies the next time you fucked, and you realized inflicting pain wasn’t what turned him on – he didn’t want to hurt you, he wanted to mark you. Those were his fingerprints on your arm.
So much was taken away from him at a young age that of course he wanted to claim you as his own. Hickies were more conventionally sexy than bruises, so he was less ashamed about admiring them in front of you and telling you how pretty you look. Even gently rubbing a large one on your neck during a Family meeting, which made his brother huff and tell you to get a room. Corazon did get a room after that – pulled you aside into a private bathroom and fucked you against the sink while making you stare at yourself in the mirror. Whispering in a deep voice about how the color of your hickies matched his plum-colored lipstick.
A few weeks later, he came home in the middle of the night after being away on a mission with Diamante and Trebol for nearly a week. Thunder boomed outside the window and his feathery black coat left behind a trail of rainwater as he stumbled into your shared room. His tall frame visibly shook with anger, his dark sunglasses barely covered the fury burning in his eyes. You got out of bed to greet him and asked how the operation went, but he just pulled you into a very wet hug and mumbled, “I don’t want to think about it ever again.” 
You blinked slowly and whispered, “I can help you forget.”
The blonde threw his half-burned cigarette to the floor then smashed his lips against yours. He didn’t bother taking the time to build up to a heated kiss. Immediately biting your lower lip raw before pushing his long tongue inside your mouth. Your eyes fluttered shut, easily submitting and letting him take whatever he wanted from you. The smell of smoke caught both of your attention. Corazon instinctively stomped out the cigarette ashes smoldering on the throw rug without tearing away from the kiss for even a moment. 
“Let me use you.” He looked as desperate as he sounded. “Just for tonight, can you be my little doll? I’ll make it up to you later, I promise, I’ll be so good to you.” Heat shot straight to your core and you nodded fervently, clutching onto his drenched clothes like your life depended on it.
Which is how you ended up with his lengthy cock down your throat, your bare ass in the air and body wedged between his sprawled-out legs. Calloused fingers tangled in your hair to firmly guide you up and down. Graciously giving you time to relax by letting you swirl your tongue around the swollen tip, though he never pulled you entirely off his dick. He looked so pretty like this – damp hair clinging to his forehead, pale cheeks turned pretty pink, subtly squirming on the mattress, pupils fully blown out with lust. 
Corazon suddenly thrust upwards to hear you gag, several inches of his cock forcing their way into your tight throat. Tiny teardrops reflexively lined your eyes as your gag reflex kicked in. You expected the blonde to panic and immediately stop – even though it was just your body’s natural reaction and you were enjoying every second. But instead, he licked his lips like he wanted to devour you. 
There were those Doflamingo genes.
But unlike his selfish brother, Corazon asked if you were comfortable with everything happening for the second time that night. You gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up, obviously unable to verbally confirm with his dick stretching your mouth to its limit. His cock drooled salty precum onto your tongue as thick globs of your drool dripped down to his balls. 
You used both hands to stroke the rest of his length that couldn’t fit in your mouth – the huge man had a huge dick to match. Corazon swatted them away, held your wrists in one giant hand then pushed down hard until every inch of him was deep in your throat, messy blonde pubes tickling your nose. He was glad he set up a sound barrier, otherwise the entire Family would’ve heard the debauched moan that spilled from his lips.
After a few moments of admiring you and the prominent bulge in your throat, your boyfriend released you just before it became too much. “Good girl,” Corazon panted with a dazed smile. “Such a good girl, taking it all like you’re supposed to.”
He gave up trying to hold back after that, bucking his hips against your face and rambling about how pretty and perfect you looked like this. He pressed your head all the way down again just before he hit his peak, shooting a large load of cum directly into your stomach. When he saw your ruined state, a dark pit formed in his stomach. Tears stained your cheeks and spit dripped down your chin as you gasped for air, and he was turned on by it. 
Corazon quickly pulled you close to press soft kisses against your cheek and make sure you were okay. Nothing you said seemed to convince him, so you brought his hand between your thighs. When he swiped a finger through your folds, his eyes widened at how wet you were. He admired the way your sticky juices webbed between his digits, then immediately began toying with your cunt.
“I would’ve stopped you if you didn’t like it,” you grinned, shamelessly rutting against the palm of his hand. “Ruin me with your cock more. I’ll be a good toy for you.”
Corazon gulped, stomach fluttering with sinful excitement. “O-Okay, if… if you’re sure that’s what you want.”
Both of you knew he wanted it more than anything.
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salemlunaa · 5 months ago
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I might just be overthinking this but (this is lengthy, I wanted to explain as best I could)
I’ve been procrastinating the void for three years now it’s crazy. I haven’t got insane yet, but I have this terrible routine of going throughout the day wanting to enter the void but when I come home and it’s time for bedtime and all that suddenly want to enter leaves this magical third-party force making me do this. It’s a conscious choice. I just don’t get why I keep setting myself up for this disappointment every single day. 
Ive gone through all the reasonings. Even tho this current life makes me nothing but unhappy, tired, and I constantly feel like a shell of myself but it’s what I’m used to another thing I’ve noticed is I only want to enter the void when I’m actively doing something I don’t like like I’m at work or I’m at school or I’m doing homework but when I’m laying down in my bed I guess I’m not inconvenience so I guess I just tell myself all is OK even though there’s this voice deep down screaming at me to just enter the void because I know I’m gonna be disappointed and irritated myself next morning if I don’t, and I always just ignore it.
I don’t know if it’s because I prefer to imagine my dream life at a safe distance in just my head as insane as that sounds. I used to think I was afraid of change, but it’s not that cause I’ve always adapted to it. Well, I guess it was just usually not really my choice I had to. I’ve come to terms with the fact that there’s no way for me to prepare for a life. I haven’t experienced. I’m over that. I know. I deserve to live an stress-free fun life after the bullshit I’ve gone through. I mean, clearly I don’t want enough but at the same time I clearly do because I keep screaming at myself to just do it. I don’t know why my procrastination or laziness or stubbornness. I don’t know why I let it overpower that
Four years probably since I don’t know at least fifth or sixth grade I believe that somehow someway they’re just has to be away I can get the dream life I’ve been dreaming of. I don’t know why, but I just feel like something can do it for me like there’s no way I’m destined to live this shitty ass life, and now that I found the power to do so now I just keep pushing it back. Oh I’ll do it later even though I’m wanted this for years since I was probably 11, im 20 now, I found out about his whole community when I was 17 on a Saturday evening binge eating fruit snacks.
Im just so frustrated with myself, how I can allow myself to keep making my own suffering at this point, I know all the why but I don’t understand the why. Why I keep doing this to myself and how to stop it, I try to think and understand it everyday. I want to enter the void and get the life I deserve and I don’t plan on giving up ever.
Ik this is super long so thank you so much for answering if you do. can I be your 🌶️🥒 (spicy dill) anon, if that’s still a thing?
hi love🌶️🥒
you have the exact same problem that majority of this community has so please don’t feel lonely. A lot of people spend their days doing nothing at all and wait for the last second to apply.
you are not destined to live a shitty life, you get to craft your own life and i know it can be comforting imagining that from afar, but if you really want it you have to lock in, like really, you actually have to try.
I don’t want you to waste any more years like this so some advice i will give you is whenever you have any free time include the void, try and if it “fails” go back to what you know is true, relaxation and detachment and try again.
This is such a common problem in the community and your story will resonate with so many people, so to everyone reading this go an apply, stop killing time 💋💋
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appleblueberry-pie · 11 months ago
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Im back with another yandere satoru request hehehe
So, I was wondereding what would happen if Satoru's beloved found out about his very unhealthy obession with her?
Hold on, lemme cook rq- So, instead of getting the fuck away from him (like most logical people would do) she decides to try her best to get him some help. Like, she'd confront him about his very distirbing behavior, (basically tearing down his entire facade and presenting it to him) and when he's begging her not to be afraid of him, not to abandon him, she tells him that she wants him to get help.
Heres where I kinda got a little stuck....the thing is...he would listen to her every beck and call, but would he really get the help he needs, or would he decieve her and trick her into beliving that he's getting better when in realitly he hasn't changed at all. (He's just alot more careful about what he does behind her back.)
Mkayyy, thats all folks. Thanks for coming to my ted talk.
You kept hearing noises from your backyard.
It woke you up. You couldn't really recognize what it was, but you really hoped it wasn't raccoons eating your berries again. You admit, your garden has many fruits and vegetables, but you certainly didn't want them being eaten. They took too long to grow! So, you got out of bed, threw on your robe over your night gown and quickly made your way downstairs to your backdoor.
When you opened the door and stepped onto the grass, everything seemed fine. Your strawberries were intact. Carrots still growing. No lemons dropped from the tree. But to the far right, you did see a familiar figure continuously puncturing another man's insides with a pretty dangerous looking knife thing.
Someone was in your yard.
Someone was being killed in your yard.
You're within distance of a killer.
By the time the realization set in, the familiar looking man had already saw you staring at him. It was Satoru Gojo.
You both stared at each other. It grew painfully silent and you took a step back, your eyebrows furrowing. You began hearing your heartbeat in your ears and began breathing faster. Your lips separated, probably to scream, and Satoru dropped the knife, immediately running over to you to shut you up in time.
When he trapped you in his arms, you tried to scream in surprise, but he already had one of his hands covering the entire bottom half of your face. "SHHHHHHHhhhhhh. shhhhhhhh. shhhhhh." His heartbeat thumped against your upper back and you tried to look up at him. He was already staring down at you with those big blue eyes and you tried to take his hand off of your mouth. "It's okay, baby. You're alright. It's alright."
Well, he didn't kill you, so clearly you didn't have to be scared. You still tried to talk and he tilted his head. "......you gonna scream if I let you go?" You shook your head. He stared down at you, as if he was trying to catch you in a lie. But then he laughed and finally loosened his hold on you. You took his hand off of your mouth and turned around. "...............Why are you killing someone in my yard?"
He says nothing.
You try to look back at the corpse and he blocks your way. "Fertilizer."
You avert your gaze and hug yourself. "For your tree."
"I already fertilized it two weeks ago. You were there. It doesn't need fertilizer until like a few months later." Satoru goes silent and sighs.
"Alright, babe. You caught me." He stalks closer to you and stops when he's directly in front of you.
"I killed him because he was a terrible waste of space." His smile was unnerving and you only felt more uncomfortable and confused. "What....?" "....He was useless. And he got in the way." The way he spoke made things a little awkward between the two of you. Did this have something to do with you and him? You hoped not. But with the way he said it, and the way he was staring at you began giving you confirmation that this was the case.
"He doesn't deserve you like I do." You inhale sharply and take a step back towards your door. "Satoru-" "No, I'm serious."
"You can't just....kill someone. He's dead!" His shoulders shake as he laughs at your statement. "You think I don't know that? That's the whole point. To die." You shake your head, "I-I need to get you help. This isn't okay. You shouldn't think it's okay to kill someone just to....I don't even know."
"To have you," He states. But you didn't hear. You were already back in the house to research different forms of treatment he could possibly receive. You didn't know what you were going to do with the body.
Satoru did plan to use it as fertilizer.
He lied to you for 12 weeks. And he hated every second of it. He never liked hiding shit from you. Which is why he straight up told you that he killed that dumbass from a while ago. You deserve better than some liar. But he'd be damned if he let some random take you away from him. So, he told you that he was going to the therapist that he been paid off and also killed.
He told you the body was taken care of and you didn't have to worry about it. After all, your tree leaves looked perkier than usual(he didn't tell you that either).
When you heard he was consistently meeting with his therapist, you let him take you out more often. You let him hang out at your place to have sleepovers if you had the time, and you realized that you might have a small crush on him. You shouldn't have a crush on a killer, but here you were. You should've called the police on him a long time ago(not like he'd get rid of them either), but he promised you he'd be good. And he has been. So you trust him.
Satoru learned to stop doing things like being a killer when you're around. It was smart to do it at night. But definitely not where you live. Probably the stupidest thing he's ever done. He should buy that house a few towns off. Everyone would be better off dying in there anyways, especially if there'd be no trace of them in the first place.
He's lucky you're gullible.
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anonimusunnoaniswriting · 10 months ago
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Noni !!!! ♡
Help! Staaap me ! I'm having ideas aaaa, I don't write well, but the muses gave me this, and I need to torment someone with it ! Lucky you !!
Here was I doing the dishes and daydreaming about a certain blonde sorcerer, and I'm giving you the idea/prompt/ idk what this is, but maybe it.could turn into a story in your dexterous hands. Hehehohoho
Your husband Nanami Kento wakes up and you're not there, he hears you the kitchen making Saturday morning lazy day off work breakfast.
He wakes up hit and bothered and go the kitchen to tempt you, he's in grey sweatpants, you are wearing his white t-shirt. In a soft gruff morning voice, you're in the sink washing some fruits, he kisses the nape of your neck, talking smoothly into your ear, you can feel his "discomfort" pressed up into your back, he carries you, coax you back to bed, kisses wherever he can. You continue carrying on with your duty, playing vou, until his slips a finger into your panties, starts toying with you and then your done for it, breakfast forgotten, he carried you back to bed and sweet, spicy love making morning time. 🔥🥵💀❤️‍🔥
Sends you a hug and well wishes ! I'm gonna rot in hell with all these ideas.
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Tags/warnings: MDNI 18+, P in V, Cunnilingus, BJ's Domestic, Established relaationship, Soft Nanami Kento, mention of washing dishes and 1 mention of kidnapping (there is no kidnapping Nanami is just anxiety ball) FLUFF, smut, idk what else.
A/N: Here it is. Im sorry it took me so long to write this i mean i really put the pro in procrastination...
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A sudden clang of metal jolted Nanami Kento out of bed. Immediately, his arm reached out to his right-– empty. The messy bed and askew pillow suggested someone may have lain there, but the lack of warmth that reached the blonde's fingers suggested that the one he looked for had left long before he arose. 
Nanami swung his legs off the side of the bed and, picking up his grey sweatpants off the floor but not quite bothering with his slippers, cautiously made his way out of the room toward the offending noise. His hand balled up in a fist, ready to attack whatever intruder there may have been awaiting and, of course, to defend the love of his life: you. 
But what met Nanami's eyes instead was the most breathtaking sight he had ever seen…
In the soft golden glow of the gentle morning sun, you stood— illuminated. 
Your hair was still messy from it being smushed against the pillow. You wore his white tee-shirt, which strained against your hips, tummy, and chest wrapping you in a secure embrace. And on your feet were your fluffy, bunny bedroom slippers. His tee-shirt barely covered your ass which Nanami quickly realised was bare underneath, when you lifted your arms, trying to reach a higher shelf. You were washing dishes…washing dishes… the clang. Nanami quickly put two and two together and smiled. There was no danger after all – save that of his breath loss.
He silently crept up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Good morning, beloved.” 
You jumped, dropping the bowl you'd been sleepily scrubbing, replicating the sound that woke Nanami from his dreams. “Christ, Ken…you scared the shit out of me.” 
The man behind you chuckled. He dipped his head to rest in the crook of your neck starting to kiss your skin softly. The smell of the bed still lingered on your body, warm and sweet. 
“We'll, we're even now. For a moment I thought you were being kidnapped and were putting up quite a fight.” 
“What—what do you mean?”
“A loud clang woke me up.” 
Silence fell as you stood trying to process the reason, during which time Nanami's nose grazed against your skin trailing down, inhaling your sweet scent. 
“Did you know how much you smell like something terribly edible in the mornings?” He nipped at you. 
“Ken…” you whispered, “It's early, Ken.”
“Mmm.”
“We forsook the dishes last night already. I really want to finish up.”
“Well, I'm not stopping you, am I?” 
You sighed and tentatively resumed the slow scrubbing of the bowl you had dropped earlier. 
Nanami dropped his hands from your waist to the hem of his tee shirt on you. You felt the fabric creep up the swell of your ass. 
“Kento-o-o,” you warned. 
“Go on. You're still able to wash the dishes.”
The lips on your neck burned,  sucking and licking at the thin skin. A wanton moan sounded somewhere, and with a blush, you realised it was you. 
Nanami chuckled. “That’s my girl.” 
“Nanami Kento, you really are incorrigible,” You turned around to kiss him. 
“Can you blame me? When I walked in here to find you looking like everything I ever dreamed of?” Your noses touched, and Nanami pushed his hips against yours. Suddenly the room felt hotter than before. “Do you see what you do to me…”
You could feel the growing bulge in his sweatpants. It strained against the fabric reaching out, needing touch. 
Nanami flipped you around so he could face your back and ground against your ass. His hands reached up to cup your breasts pulling you into him so he could whisper in your ear.
“Let's play a game, let's see if I can make you come before you can finish washing up. If you finish washing first, you win and I'll buy lunch for us today. If I make you come, well, you're buying.” 
Your lover's fingers found your slit. Expertly delving into the folds, he toyed with the bundle of nerves between. You were playing a losing game. The events of the night before were still fresh in your muscle memory and with the lightest touch your libido had been awoken again, remembering the touches from a few hours ago. 
Trying and struggling to pick up a plate and the sponge, you quickly realised your grip was lacking. Kento kissed your neck again, this time with the intention of leaving marks. His semi-hard cock prodded at your back and the thought of him lifting you onto the kitchen counter flashed in your mind. 
“You seem to have lost some soap darling,” Nanami said without missing a beat. You looked down at your hand, curled up in a fist, squeezing the once-pregnant sponge for all it was worth. “Now wouldn't it be something if I could make you come on just my fingers…” 
“Ken…this isn't fair,” you whined. 
“Oh is that so, would you like me to stop then?” 
You shook your head vigorously. 
“That's what I thought.” 
Keeping his fingers at your clit, Nanami kneeled down and used his other hand, and shoulders, to spread your legs apart. The tight tee-shirt rolled up your ass, exposing it to the cold morning air and you felt goosebumps rise. He spread your asscheeks and dipped his face right in, replacing his fingers with his tongue. You were already dripping. It wouldn't take long. 
The dishes lay untouched. Your knuckles were white from squeezing the sponge, and here you were, just seconds away from coming all over your lover's face.
Anticipating the release, Nanami hummed against your pussy and in his signature baritone commanded, “Come for me.” 
His lips wrapped around your throbbing clit sucking on the nub. Your legs gave way and immediately his hands caught hold of your waist. 
“Fuck– haa– coming, Ken–” 
Your thighs quivered and your orgasm came shattering through and you held the countertop for support as Nanami helped you ride out your high, licking you with slow broad stripes. When you slowly came down from it he withdrew, getting to his feet. 
“Guess I won that round.” 
You did not complain when he took your hands and led you away to the bedroom. The tee shirt was the first to come off. With it, he wiped away any remaining soap suds on your arms. He sat you down on the bed, your legs still unsteady, and you took the opportunity to grab the waistband of his sweatpants. 
“Sweetheart, you don't have to…” 
You shushed him. “I want to, please?” You said, looking up at him with big eyes. 
Nanami nodded. 
You tugged the fabric down, letting his cock spring free. 
Smiling at him, half disbelieving you remarked, “It's like we barely touched each other last night, look at you Min-min…” 
Nanami stroked your head. “It's the effect you have on me, Princess. You turn me on, so fucking much…” 
Your tongue licked a long stripe up his length, while you kept your eyes locked on him. “I could say the same about you, you know.”
Nanami closed his eyes and tilted his head back, the grip on your hair tightened. 
“Really? In that case, I'd suggest we keep doing that for each other for the rest of our lives.” 
You took the head in your mouth and bobbed up and down on it, letting him fill you. Although he allowed you to go at your own pace his hand never left your head, gently stroking your soft hair. With one hand you wrapped the base of his cock where your mouth couldn't reach and pumped him in time to the movements of your head. 
As it was always, Nanami's size was not easy. No matter how many times you took him in your mouth, you would dribble and drool, trying to fit more. Fortunately, this served to only spur the man on, and he gently thrust into your mouth – careful not to hurt you. 
It was evident you were not the only one still raw from the night before. Quiet grunts and deep growls, in the company of sharp hisses, as your tongue found its way around his cock head, told you that despite looking composed, Nanami was as desperate as you felt yourself to be. The wetness between your thighs only increased as you sucked his cock – turned on by not only what you were doing for him but also what you were doing to him.
A sudden loud hiss and Nanami grunted, “Shit, babe, get off!”
Losing yourself in the feeling of his cock in your mouth you failed to notice how Nanami's balls had tightened, ready to unload. You released him with a pop but continued stroking. “Come in my mouth,” You felt a twitch under your fingers but continued your gentle movement. 
“No, not your mouth, need to – feel—”
He pushed you down to the bed without waiting for a response. You smirked, and spread your legs. 
“Look at you, so desperate for this pussy. If only people knew how the great Nanami Kento could be made to kneel so easily.” 
Nanami blushed, lining his cock up with your entrance. His hands fondled your breasts lightly flicking the hardened nipples. 
Your breath hitched in your throat as he pushed past the small opening, stretching you out onto his cock.
“I could– say the same– about you, my love,” Nanami parroted your earlier statement. 
He bottomed out easier than usual, filling you to the brim. Your hands found purchase in his hair – tugging gently and you pulled his head to yours, meeting his mouth in a rough, sloppy kiss. He pinched your nipples just as you slipped your tongue in his mouth and swallowed the filthy moan that dripped from your lips. 
Kisses coupled with well-timed thrusts had you at the edge well enough, but Nanami was far ahead of you. Desperate to have you come around his cock again he searched the bed for the small vibrator that had been discarded among the rumpled sheets the night before. Not once did he stop fucking into you, searching only with the sense of touch and, when he finally came by it, wasted no time in switching it on and laying it on your clit.
The effect was almost instantaneous. Your hips bucked upwards as blasphemous prayers dripped from your swollen lips. He grabbed hold of you, easily lifting your body into an embrace feeling the strong vibrations run up his cock as well. His thrusts grew faster and rougher with each passing minute.
“Hnng– fuck, I'm going to come, baby,” he growled. 
Your fingers carded at his hair and you pulled his even closed faces just inches apart as you looked into his eyes and cried, “C- come for me then. Right– right now. With me!”
Nanami let go with a guttural groan spilling inside you, at the same time you felt your climax wash over you. Your pussy held Nanami in a vice-like grip pulsing and throbbing as he emptied into you and you gushed onto him. The vibrator fell to the bed, once again lost among the sheets but you couldn't care less. Nanami was kissing you, like it was the first time he'd ever kissed you. Lips, teeth, hands, you were pulled into him as he devoured you. 
The high gradually faded. You laid your head on Nanami's arm leaving small kisses along his skin – wherever you could reach. He smiled down at you. 
“I meant it you know, let's actually keep turning each other on for our whole lives…”
You looked up at him, your heart full. “Nanami Kento, as much as I love you, I'm not accepting that proposal. You have to get me a ring.” 
He chuckled and pulled you into his arms, kissing the top of your head, “I'll do that, and more. Starting with our repeatedly abandoned dishes.” 
You kissed his chest smiling. “I can't wait to say ‘I do’.” 
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A/N: GUys i DROPPED MY PHONE ON MY FACE JUST AS I FINISHED THE SEX SCENE and it very STRATEGICALLY landed right on a pimple on my forehead with the corner like FML. here i am thinking about being railed into SUNday by MR NANAMI KENTO AND MY PHONE SAYS BONK GO TO HORNY JAIL HELP. THAT TOO DURING PRIDE MONTH. is this a hatecrime???
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six-eyed-samurai · 10 months ago
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SUMMARY: Rindou loves you and all but...you really aren't supposed to be spamming his phone during a meeting right now.... A/N: This is absolute crack, based off a recent convo and dedicated to my unhinged moot @plebbypebblepleb WARNINGS: Sanzu on drugs and swearing
>>look at this cat I found
>>he's so cute!!!!!!
>>IM GONNA DIE FROM CUTENESS can we pls pls adopt him???
>>never mind
>>HE BIT ME
Rindou felt his eye twitch. He discreetly swiped away the notifications on his pinging phone away under the table. Thankfully no one had noticed yet, although Ran was grinning slyly at him he always was.
Twenty messages.
Barely ten minutes had even gone by in the meeting.
Luckily he had turned off volume for his phone. Mikey wouldn't be too happy to have his Bonten meeting so frequently interrupted so unprofessionally. Rindou didn't have much interest in being laughed at or questioned by the others either.
>>riiiiiiin
>>I was watching some videos
>>would you become a 100 foot boa constructor who eats British children boiled and gets skinned to be used as socks or boots for a Russian lady I consumed three centuries ago (she tasted like coconut)
I'm in a meeting<<
And no???<<
Rindou continued to nod at Mikey's words, doing his utmost best to divide his attention between his rapidly typing fingers and his boss while Ran ducked his head under the table curiously and came up with a wink and a very obvious smirk. Koko eyes them both suspiciously.
He was used to this. Absolutely. One thing that came with dating you was that you had a tendency to spam his phone with updates of what you were doing, odd things you had seen, the most creative of questions and pictures bordering on unhinged.
He wouldn't change it for anything, of that Rindou was certain. He loved you to Pluto and back and in an every day fight he'd take your side over Ran (even despite the elder Haitani’s “miserable” theatrics of supposed betrayal). The texts livened up the dreary work of being part of the number one most wanted criminal gang.
But…
>>I'M NOT FINISHED
>>or drink fruit juice that will give you the seven most deadly diseases
Both are terrible<<
>>[image attached]
WTF<<
>>Like it?? <33
I don't want close up pics of your feet<<
>>how dare you
…it was quite the inconvenience when he was supposed to be working.
Like right now.
Rindou reached up and rubbed his temples. Mikey was getting to the important part and he was really struggling to concentrate. It wasn't like you didn't know he was busy. He had specifically mentioned it today. Rindou couldn't fault you either - this was just your love language and…this was probably revenge for him misplacing your favourite shirt.
He briefly considered ignoring your texts for now, until he could answer them later. But then it'd probably spiral to a 100+ and the vibrations were really starting to get to him. And he did once promise to never ignore anything you said after you apologized for talking too much. You might even call him.
Ugh. What a conundrum.
Ran’s smile widened and a new notification sprang up on Rindou’s phone.
>>Ah ah ah lil bro
>>texting your gf in a meeting?
>>you're very obvious about it
>>I'm sure Mikey will notice soon~~
Great. Two idiots were spamming up his phone now. Couldn't he ever catch a break? He caught Kakucho’s frown at him and adjusted his poker face again.
Shut up<<
You're on your phone too<<
>>I'm just warning you~~
Rindou exhaled sharply and kicked his brother under the table. Childish, but Ran was a child and he deserved it.
>>Rin???
>>guess what!!
>>my fav singer just dropped a new album!!
>>can we buy it later
>>pleaseeeeee
“Haitani Shithead! What are you doing under the table?”
Crap, Sanzu caught him. Rindou shrugged, leaning away from his side-eyeing neighbor. “Nothing, just need to arrange some things on my phone for some debts to be collected,” He lies casually.
The pinkhead is probably too high to realize the holes in the fib. Thankfully he lets it go with another pop of a pill. “Sure, don’t gotta be so secretive.”
“Also, don’t call me Shithead.”
>>[3 images attached]
>>chat wake up what is going on in my friends gc rn
Yes, Rindou wanted to scream, he absolutely had to be secretive…with the cursed pictures you had just sent him. Thirty unread messages already and the meeting wasn’t even ending yet! God, Ran wasn’t helping either - he too was now spamming Rindou’s chat.
>>rindou and (y/n)
>>sitting in a tree
>>k
>>i
>>s
You know what, he could make his excuses later. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Rindou massaged his temples again, sighed deeply and looked down on his phone.
He blocked the both of you.
***
Of course it came back to bite his ass when he went home later that night: having taken extreme offense to the block you had promptly banished Rindou out of your once shared bedroom and he was exiled to the couch.
Which was being hogged by Ran who claimed he was there first for his sixth nap of the day.
Maybe next time he should just “lose” his phone before a meeting.
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ajearthlinggg · 6 months ago
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exposing you based on your fav will wood/wwatt song (my longest post)
A lot of these have nothing to do with the song. They're basically headcannons lmao. My Blake Jennings is showing
No instrumental chnt except Rhumba sorry
i started this in June enjoy
EIAL
6up 5oh copout: its low hanging fruit to say you hate cops, and I'm taking it. You hate cops.
Skeleton Appreciation whatever the fuck: Covid RUINED you
Front Street: you like Heathers
Aikido!: how's that obsessiveness and inability to let go going?
White Knuckle Jerk: you also like nu metal for the same reason. (Its incredibly horny)
Cover This Song: same as Aikido but only with your exes omg do not text them they are assholes
Thermodynamic Lawyer: PLEASE take time to calm down when you get overstimulated I promise if you don't do anything abt it you will have such a terrible mental breakdown
Red Moon: YOU LISTEN TO MALE MANIPULATOR MUSIC STOP TRYING TO HIDE IT YOU CANT BE IN THE RADIOHEAD CLOSET FOREVER
Lysergide daydream: I honestly do not like this song at all so you get a pass (don't kill me)
The First Step: you're usually quiet but you know how to SCREAM.
Jimmy Mushroom: you're usually quiet but- I'm just kidding. You're always quiet
Chemical Overreaction: you're usually quiet but if- I'm just kidding. You are never quiet
Everything is a lot/dte: insomnia. I dont know why,but insomnia
Self-ish
self/ish: closet theatre kid
2012: fast talker to a not comprehendible level
Cotard Solution: turn off the v-sauce it is 2 am
Mr. Capgras: turn off the 🌽 it is 2 am
The Song With Five Names: you have incredible taste. You can't describe that taste, but hey, its incredible
Hand me my shovel: you were the only talented kid in your elementary music class
Dr. Sunshine is Dead: you love the smell of cigarettes
TNA
Suburbia overture: BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD
222: your English teacher loves you (you're so goddamn gay)
Laplace's Angel: your English teacher hates you. How do I know? Because you can't pronounce anything (its la-plass-es not la-place-is)
i/me/myself: you have to beat off the fake fan allegations with a stick everyday
Wbtta: hey queen. How are those hyperfixations going
Outliars and hyppocrates: you spell the title wrong every. damn. time.
bbw: same as 2012 but holy shit triple it.
Marsha, thankk you: dyslexia and ADHD
Love, me normally: I get it. I'm not even gonna expose you. You already have it bad enough
Momento Mori: you are just SO quirky! (knives whisper things to you when you hold them)
Icimi
Tomcat Disposables: you'd shove photos of your pets in your friends faces even if they were dangling off a bridge
Becoming the last names: you either have wonderful parents in a happy relationship or your parents have been divorced for years and you will never relate to this song
Cicada Days: stop using self deprecating humor around the wrong people PLEASE
Euthanasia: this song is a masterpiece I have nothing to say about you.
Falling Up: WONDERFUL TASTE. AMAZING CHOICE. NO RECOLLECTION OF YOUR CHILDHOOD.
That's enough: you love Alex g you just don't know it yet
Um its kind of a lot: you either already love Scott pilgrim or it will happen. Its a canon event
Half decade hangover: omg twinn!! I have an addictive personality, too!
(I feel like this is a good time to say don't take these too seriously)
You liked this: ...what?
The main character: you can't relate to the song, you hate yourself
Sdrr: IF I SEE ONE MORE PERSON TAKING THIS SONG SUPER SERIOUSLY IM GONNA LOSE MY SHIT YDHZJABXV
Bfb: ur just a silly lil guy
Willard!: you're a therian. There is no human explanation to this.
white noise: you love pink floyd you just don't know it yet
Atkf: HOW TF DID I FORGET THIS ONE anyways you get bad habits (nail biting, staying up too late. Etc)
CHNT
Yes to err: you are still waiting for chnt season 2 BC you want to see what happens with Adam
Your body, my temple: I have a strong feeling you have a tummy ache right now
Venetian Blind Man: you love nobody sexually you just don't know it yet (this is a very ace choice idk why)
Rhumba of Death: you LOVE Halloween
When Somebody Needs You: Tyler the Creator is probably your favorite rapper
Live
Trww
Self/ish: You can't sleep if your room has the SLIGHTEST amount of light in it
10-4 6-up: unlike the original, you don't just hate cops, you hate anybody who can tell you what to do (your teachers are probably just trying to do their job. please)
Cotards Solution: you can't sleep without background noise
Dr Sunshine Lives!: You never get sick physically (mentally on the other hand...)
Where do you get off: omg the horniest of the horny. Gerard Way on stage levels of horny. Nine Inch Nails levels of horny. (Or you really like Umbrella Academy idk why)
Aikido: you can't relate to it. You hate everybody
Take a break grab some water this is getting long
Thermodynamic Lawyer: you have gotten kicked out of restaurants because of how loud you are
Front Street: WE GET IT. IT'S BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL.
Wasting away again: I am so sorry holy shit
Hand me my (x), I'm (y): you suck at algebra
The First Step: you wish you could do the AUGHHHHHHHH
2012: severe social anxiety
Mr capgras: literally the opposite of 2012 (live)
Chemical Overreaction: you know so many random fun facts
Fibrodysplasia: I'm not even gonna talk about your mental issues because I will be banned from this app (which is pretty much impossible)
Icid
Cicada Days: you also get a pass fuck I'm so sorry
The main character okay you ACTUALLY can relate to it
Icimi: OMG I LOVE YOU
atkf: you cry every day even if you aren't sad
Becoming the last names: please don't become a Disney adult
Vampire ref: LISTEN TO MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN PUTTING IT OFF AND IK YOU LOVE HOT VAMPIRE MUSIC
Half decade hangover: oh my god talk to somebody it'll be okay I'm so sorry
Tsw5n: you love the way he says "what the fuck"
Euthanasia: once again, ANOTHER PASS. IM SO SORRY I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY
Jimmy Mushrooms: You. Me. Marriage. Now.
Laplaces Angel: you listen to LitWTC
i/me/myself: you were trying to separate yourself from the normal i/me/myself fans
The first step: idk why but you REALLY like lemonade
skeleton appreciation day: you can NOT play any instrument
tomcat disposables: you love concept albums
White noise: unlike cotards, you need to sleep in SILENCE
Love me normally: arctic monkeys. that's all I have to say. idk what about them but, yeah
misanthrapologist: GAY QUEER LGBT HOMOSEXUAL FRUITY ZESTY ROMANTICALLY ATTRACTED TO PEOPLE OF THE SAME GENDER
Falling up: wonderful taste once again please don't become a Disney adult
thats enough let's get you home: you say "YIPPIE!!" a lot
And if I did: god made you shy because he knew if you weren't you would be unstoppable
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0neir0z · 2 months ago
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severance 2x05 thoughts
she cold on my harb til i or
oooh! ouch ouch owwwwwwwww owie ow!
need the entire cast to win every award
seth milchick they could never make me hate you and your excessive verbosity
helena eagan though........ idk welcome back helly r
DYLAN MY GOAT
terrible day for markhelly nation, perhaps a win for markgemma nation though
okay whatever was going on between mark and milchick in that elevator... that shit was crazy
ik ive been on my innie!irv shit but i love outie irv just as much he's so so cool. like transition goal tbh.
also just in general those old men are ABSOLUTE FREEEEAKS "unsanctioned erotic entanglement" "im sorry i came at you just now" "i know where you live" the stalking and an invitation to the all old man yaoi polycule... yeah i Bet that man gives fruit head
big day for markgemma orpheus and eurydice parallel enjoyers but at what cost
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