#if you're not me than i can't be me

[lazylittledragon]

can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024

[gatheringbones]

["Sociopolitical sources of conflict

The cost of the lesbian choice is high and provides fertile ground for anger and conflict. Invisibility, pretense, and concealment produce stresses and feelings of vulnerability beyond those of people whose relationships and sexual desires are considered normal. Most lesbians live with fear that exposure will lead to loss of jobs and income. Many fear loss of their children through custody awarded to fathers, or through emotional estrangement as the children react to their mother's difference. Few lesbians have the authentic acceptance and affirmation of their family of origin. Some lead half-lives of lies and omissions, hoping that this will maintain some sense of family and home. Still others endure tense and emotionally distance family situations.

These losses of acceptability, security, and connection combined with isolation from both family and the larger culture create an intense need to experience oneself as part of a larger group, to have some sense of belonging through relationships, alternative families, friendship networks, and social and political organizations. Thus, community-as-connection provides definition, acceptance, and inclusion; it offers sources for social life, political activity, friendships, lovers, places to go, and other types of assistance. It is these needs that make community profoundly powerful.

Lesbian communities are typically defined by geography and composed of groups or networks who are connected through social and political activity. In small towns or universities, there may be a sense of one larger community; in larger cities, there may be many communities. The center of community can be one or more bars or coffee houses, a women's center, a social organization, self-help or discussion groups, or an occasional dance or musical event Thus, community is not a fixed entity, but rather a sense of connection or "groupness," defined and maintained by extended affiliations and frequent or even periodic contact. Community can also be more myth than reality when there is limited contact because of severe estrangement between community members.

In fact, the myth of community itself can be a source of conflict. When needs are intense and expectations of community are high, idealized notions may go beyond what any group of individuals can realistically provide— especially a group that is beleaguered and lacking in resources. Dependency upon community is also heightened by isolation from and discomfort in the larger homophobic culture. The world of the lesbian community is a small one, and social compression creates a claustrophobic sense of limitation and confinement. No matter how much support and sustenance the community does offer, it cannot replace what has been lost. Thus, members often experience feelings of bitterness and disenchantment over what the community has not and cannot provide, including the experience of "normalcy," which exists for those who conform to the values of the dominant culture. Communities also bear the weight of traumas, hurts, and jealousies as break-ups and exchanges of lovers creates ex-lovers, single lesbians, and new partnerships. Friendships between lesbians are often intense and erotically charged so that minor disagreements can be experienced as if one's friend were a rejecting lover. Tensions also exist between single and coupled lesbians and between one's friends and one's lover, because a relationship often reduces social availability. The wonder of lesbian community is not that problematic conflicts exist, but rather that communities remain cohesive, friendships weather hard times, and ex-lovers become friends. Social events too often are joyous occasions characterized by excitement, affection, gaiety, elation, and a wonderful sense of belonging and oneness.

However, stresses remain and an addition burden on lesbian communities is the self-hating of internalized homophobia. If a woman has ambivalent feelings about herself as a lesbian, she may also have ambivalent feelings about the worth of other lesbians. Frustration, rage, and bitterness toward one's condition may be turned outward toward the community of similar, inferiorized, and powerless others. Certainly, hating other lesbians is safer than turning one's rage toward the dominant group, which is less accessible and a great deal more threatening. Such feelings can also provide a sense of the little power any oppressed individual has in oppressing someone as powerless as herself. Thus, within-group conflict contains and deflects the impulse toward aggressive action inherent in frustration and rage, a convenient dynamic for any dominant group.

Another factor that can create conflict is the intense demand for sameness, for a common and collective identity that is typical of many communities. This demand for sameness can clash with the drive toward individual identity— that is, the wish to be one's own person and make independent choices. Susan Kreiger describes this demand for sameness as "mirroring," that is, the expectation that others will be a mirror image of oneself. This demand for sameness in lesbian community makes difference uncomfortable and suspect, as if dissimilarity could erode cohesiveness. The contradiction is that lesbians happen to be a remarkably diverse group. What lesbians share, aside from gender, is a decision to act on a preference, the preference to relate both emotionally and sexually to women. All the rest can be differences— race, ethnicity, class, politics, education, work, living styles, bisexual inclination, role identity, differences in sexual/political coming out, sexual behavior, early or late awareness of attraction to women. What is special to lesbians (and gay men) as an oppressed group is that there is an attempt to create bonding and community without a shared historical or cultural experience (unlike other oppressed groups, Blacks or Jews, for example), and in spite of enormous diversity. That both community and lesbian culture have been achieved, including a sense of lesbian history, tradition, and humor, is no small accomplishment.

The women's movement added substantially to community cohesiveness in terms of political beliefs and activities. It also drew lines between politicized and nonpoliticized lesbians and created new arenas for dispute in its initial denial of difference and its insistence on political sameness."]

sarah f. pearlman, from the saga of continuing clash in lesbian community, or will an army of ex lovers fail? from lesbian psychologies: explorations and challenges, edited by the boston lesbian psychologies collective, 1987

[mbohjeezart]

[ WIP ]

Bring a goat to a courthouse...

[captainjonnitkessler]

I firmly believe that any movement focused on how you *think* people should act instead of how they *actually* act is doomed to failure. In light of that I think it's clear that Democrats have failed to engage voters and drive turnout, and they desperately need a new strategy before 2026.

My sympathy for the absolute children who think it's a candidate's responsibility to get them "excited" about politics in exchange for spending the time to vote one day out of every 1460 instead of viewing being an educated voter as a civic responsibility is at an absolute fucking zero right now

[scarlettfevor]

I just saw this video talking about actresses who've had to wear sexualized outfits on film that made them uncomfortable (think Margot Robbie in Suicide Squad) and it brought up an ongoing concern of mine about how films and tv shows are way more explicit now than they've been before. Thinking about how many actresses have been topless or nude on camera when it's totally unnecessary) Like I know Hollywood is experimental and would show sex and nudity in their films, I don't have a problem with that it's just how disproportionate the amount of women vs men who have to be naked and sexualized in film is. It's misogyny, pure and simple. Forcing actresses to put their bodies and sexuality on display for the pleasure of male directors and a male audience. And I hate that you can never point out how many actresses have come out and said that no, they didn't like wearing sexualized outfits on screen, they didn't like going nude/being pressured to go nude, they don't like sex scenes or explicit rape scenes but still anytime anyone mentions this you have to fight puritan allegations because god forbid you question how a notoriously sexualized and objectified marginalized community seems to always be sexualized and objectified in media.

[sergle]

man, you know, nobody asked me, but I have such conflicting opinions on some of the fat falin art, where on one hand: it's always nice to see A Fat Body in fanart anywhere + it's being done in positive ways, for funsies and on the other hand, there is something so familiar about how you are automatically The Fat One if you are a woman simply standing next to a more petite woman, bc I've had a 0% hitrate in seeing people change Marcille's body type and keep Falin's, or change both of them. it's just Falin

[marshmallowgoop]

no thoughts just Heiji Hattori (HD)

[gingermintpepper]

In my Zeus bag today so I'm just gonna put it out there that exactly none of the great Ancient Greek warrior-heroes stayed loyal and faithful and completely monogamous and yet none of them have their greatness questioned nor do we question why they had the cultural prominence that they did and still do.

Jason, the brilliant leader of the Argo, got cold feet when it came to Medea - already put off by some of her magic and then exiled from his birthland because of her political ploys, he took Creusa to bed and fully intended on marrying her despite not properly dissolving things with Medea.

Theseus was a fierce warrior and an incredibly talented king but he had a horrible temper and was almost fatally weak to women. This is the man who got imprisoned in the Underworld for trying to get a friend laid, the man who started the whole Attic War because he couldn't keep his legs closed.

And we cannot at all forget Heracles for whom a not inconsiderable amount of his joy in life was loving people then losing the people around him that he loved. Wives, children, serving boys, mentors, Heracles had a list of lovers - male and female - long enough to rival some gods and even after completing his labours and coming down to the end of his life, he did not have one wife but three.

And y'know what, just because he's a cultural darling, I'll put Achilles up here too because that man was a Theseus type where he was fantastic at the thing he was born to do (that is, fight whereas Theseus' was to rule) but that was not enough to eclipse his horrid temper and his weakness to young pretty things. This is the man that killed two of Apollo's sons because they wouldn't let him hit - Tenes because he refused to let Achilles have his sister and Troilus who refused Achilles so vehemently that he ran into Apollo's temple to avoid him and still couldn't escape.

All four of these men are still celebrated as great heroes and men. All four of these men are given the dignity of nuance, of having their flaws treated as just that, flaws which enrich their character and can be used to discuss the wider cultural point of what truly makes a hero heroic. All four of these men still have their legacies respected.

Why can that same mindset not be applied to Zeus? Zeus, who was a warrior-king raised in seclusion apart from his family. Zeus who must have learned to embrace the violence of thunder for every time he cried as a babe, the Corybantes would bang their shields to hide the sound. Zeus learned to be great because being good would not see the universe's affairs in its order.

The wonderful thing about sympathy is that we never run out of it. There's no rule stopping us from being sympathetic to multiple plights at once, there's no law that necessitate things always exist on the good-evil binary. Yes, Zeus sentenced Prometheus to sufferation in Tartarus for what (to us) seems like a cruel reason. Prometheus only wanted to help humans! But when you think about Prometheus' actions from a king's perspective, the narrative is completely different: Prometheus stole divine knowledge and gifted it to humans after Zeus explicitly told him not to. And this was after Prometheus cheated all the gods out of a huge portion of wealth by having humans keep the best part of a sacrifice's meat while the gods must delight themselves with bones, fat and skin. Yes, Zeus gave Persephone away to Hades without consulting Demeter but what king consults a woman who is not his wife about the arrangement of his daughter's marriage to another king? Yes, Zeus breaks the marriage vows he set with Hera despite his love of her but what is the Master of Fate if not its staunchest slave?

The nuance is there. Even in his most bizarre actions, the nuance and logic and reason is there. The Ancient Greeks weren't a daft people, they worshipped Zeus as their primary god for a reason and they did not associate him with half the vices modern audiences take issue with. Zeus was a father, a visitor, a protector, a fair judge of character, a guide for the lost, the arbiter of revenge for those that had been wronged, a pillar of strength for those who needed it and a shield to protect those who made their home among the biting snakes. His children were reflections of him, extensions of his will who acted both as his mercy and as his retribution, his brothers and sisters deferred to him because he was wise as well as powerful. Zeus didn't become king by accident and it is a damn shame he does not get more respect.

[starcurtain]

One thing I wish I'd see more of among Ratio fans is some thought about how he views himself as a teacher.

Like yes, of course he refuses to compromise on the quality and rigor of the education he imparts, and he would find it unforgivably unethical to lower his standards in order to pass more students who had not genuinely learned the material. This is core to his character.

However, as someone who is a teacher IRL, I know the absolutely miserable feeling setting that kind of standard can cause. There's the obvious disheartening sense of disappointment ("Are students these days really not capable of doing the work correctly? Is our future in danger, if this is the highest level of understanding our current generation of students can achieve?"), but even worse than that is the self-doubt.

"Is this somehow my fault? Am I not teaching this material in the right ways for the students to learn? Is there something I could have done differently to get through to these students? Would a better teacher have a higher passing rate?"

We know that Ratio does (or at least did) struggle with feeling inferior to the Genius Society, so I think it is also likely, as much as he absolutely will not budge on his academic standards, that he has doubts about his teaching ability as well.

This is the man who wants to educate the entire world to cure the disease of ignorance, and yet only 3% of his actual students are able to get there. How can someone who gets so few of his direct students to a state of enlightenment hope to enlighten the whole universe? If so few students are successfully learning the material of a given class, doesn't that mean the teacher is doing something wrong?Would a better teacher--would a genius, maybe--not be able to impart their knowledge more efficiently and educate even the most challenging of students?

As someone constantly struggling with that balance between keeping academic standards high while also meeting the needs of today's students, I think the passing rates of his courses must affect Dr. Ratio much more deeply than I've seen fans discuss. I think he would question himself harshly over his class success rates, and I think he must be constantly trying to push himself to become the best teacher he possibly can be.

tl;dr: I hope one day the HSR fandom will stop sleeping on the fact that Ratio is an actual practicing professor who probably has astronomical levels of teacher angst. 😂

[humming-fly]

Inktober Day 25 - Alpha Gaming

Today I thought I'd go ahead and hunt down that new hedgehog game everyone’s so excited about, since I had a target giftcard and it's been a hot sec since I played one of these - was fully planning to hop on that cool winged shadow trend for the inktober to commemorate my success, but that changed 15 seconds into the first stage when I remembered I actually suck shit at sonic games 👍

[beanghostprincess]

A bit tired of people complaining about Sanji's principle of "not hitting women" being misogynistic when it has been clearly stated multiple times that he does not choose it and it's heavily tied to his trauma and admiration for his dad and respect for women and definitely not from seeing women as somehow weaker than him

[starry-bi-sky]

Blood Blossom lore for the Blood Blossom Au

Blood Blossoms -- otherwise scientifically known as rosa hemato -- are an extinct genus of flower from the rosaceae family that disappeared from the mortal plane in the late 1600s due to over-foraging from settlers during the Witch Trials. Prior to their extinction, they were already a rare breed of rose because of an evolutionary trait resulting in their main source of energy being ambient ectoplasm.

This means that blood blossoms only grow in areas where there are unusual levels of ectoplasm present. Regardless, however, only one or two bushes of blood blossoms can grow, as too many of them results in the ectoplasm being sucked out with no room of replenishing back to its original levels. This kills the blood blossoms in return. So a balance has to be met.

Blood blossoms have a mildly unsettling appearance. Their namesake, "blood blossom", comes from the blood red appearance of their petals, which start out as a vibrant red but steadily grows darker with age similar to blood drying on a page. Their stems, leaves, and thorns are, rather than green, a rich black-purple color. The center where the pistil sits is the typical yellow, however, it takes on the appearance of a yellow eye peering through the petals.

Blood blossoms emit a sweet, fragrant scent that allows them to not only attract bees, but also break down ectoplasm for consumption. See, what it does is that it discharges some of its pollen into the air, which then "latches on" to ecto. As the pollen begins to float down to the ground, the ectoplasm then sinks into the soil for the blood blossom to then draw into its roots. It gives the ectoplasm a physical body to latch onto, which it then uses to consume it.

Despite having a symbiotic relationship with ambient ectoplasm in it's natural habitat, the interactions it has with ghosts is an entirely different story. To ghosts, Blood Blossoms are terrifying, opportunistic parasitoids capable of consuming spirits whole if given the chance. Ghosts give off significantly more ectoplasm and when the blood blossoms sense that, they emit more pollen in order to consume it. Which is where the whole "blood blossoms are natural ghost shields" thing comes from.

Their sweet scents and vibrant colors made them popular upon discovery for perfumes and dyes, and when eaten taste sweet and slightly bitter, almost irony. Which is another reason for their namesake. During the Salem Witch Trials it was theorized that blood blossoms could expel the sins/demons from someone's body when consumed and prevent possession, or when surrounded by the roses, would trap the demons inside it's host body which would then be burned to banish it back to Hell along with the soul of it's host.

Which made them incredibly popular in executions, exorcisms, and Mass.

They could grow anywhere in the world so long as there was an adequate amount of ecto present.

Surprisingly enough, they do not commonly grow in or around gravesites due to a competitor flower nicknamed "rest in peace lilies" which, despite their name, are actually from the asparagaceae family and have more in common with bluebells. They're more modernly known as everlast bells. Ghosts prefer them over blood blossoms because they have a similar effect on ghosts as poppies do on the living where it sends them into a restful slumber. Hence their nickname "rest in peace lilies". The dead loove them.

In the Ghost Zone, their effects on the dead are far more potent than when they grew in the living realm due to the excessive amount of ectoplasm. They also grow much faster, so ghosts treat their appearances on islands similar to how one treats mint or kudzhu after finding it growing in their lawn: with extreme prejudice. And a lot of terror. Ghosts tend to rip them out when the flowers are not in bloom, or burn them when they are.

Their appearances in the Zone aren't much different than what they looked like in the living realm, with only a few mild changes like their thorns being sharper, their petals being more angular, and their eye-like center actually looking more like an eye. It's theorized that the Infinite Realm versions of blood blossoms gained very mild sentience, just enough that it almost feels like their eyes follow you when you pass by them, like a painting. Nobody is willing to test that theory.

To a ghost, getting caught in the hooks of a blood blossom means a slow, agonizing death akin to thousands of needle-sized mouths eating you all at once. The pollen doesn't stop until the ectoplasm is all broken down. Blood blossoms in the Ghost Zone are very much capable of eradicating a ghost entirely, core and all, with no chance of return. No passing go, no reconstruction, just complete oblivion.

Danny, prior to his poisoning, had severe allergic reactions when in physical contact with blood blossom in his human form. Rashes, blistering, hives wherever the blossom had physical contact with, inflammation, you name it. Luckily that hadn't been something he needed to worry about since they're, well, extinct.

[royalarchivist]

Tubbo: Yeah no– yesterday I met Roier and Missa for the first time, which was really really freaking cool. Me and Badboyhalo were walking 'round the floor, and Bad got a notification of like– [Briefly interrupted by his father] –with like, Roier taking a photo with like a viewer, and Badboyhalo was like "He is here!" 'Cuz on Insta– [An off-screen "hello" distracts him from the rest of the story] Yes?

[beaft]

anyway i'm always fascinated by the people who think that trans men transition purely to escape misogyny and gain social capital. idk how it is for other people, but since i transitioned i have not only experienced more misogyny than i ever did before but also lost access to the public spaces and support systems that might have helped me deal with it

[thequeenofsastiel]

Thinking about this:

So what I love about this is how completely accurate it is to describe your kink orientation as a "need". Because it's not just something I would like out of a relationship. It's not a want. It's a need. I'm actively unhappy in vanilla relationships(or that one time I spent a year trying to be in a relationship with another sub *shudder*). I need to be able to submit to my partner. And honestly I just need to be able to submit in general. Not having that feels like I'm suffocating. So Louis saying that he and Armand had figured out what they NEEDED from each other, not wanted, but needed, is perfectly accurate.

Also look at the love in their eyes!!!! You'll NEVER convince me that they weren't in love in Dubai.

[mydarlinglaszlo]

ok so i was really waiting for someone to gif the mika/jules scene at the end of 21x02 cause i unfortunately do not know how and i wanted to reblog it badly so ig a screenshot will suffice for now. ahhhhhhhh. it was such a short scene but it was!! so much!! to me!!

this was so soft??? them coming back to mika's house wearing civvies so they were together after work? the song in the background was so good. they were obviously holding hands or something before that. and jules stopping her for a moment before they're heading inside. the forehead touch. the way they were about to kiss before they heard Kwan playing video games (so it was obviously late). I'll forgive Kwan for the blocking cause my boy is Going Through It and I did love that they joined to keep him company, and mika helping jules beat him?? GOD!! 🥺

i love them sm!! why are they giving this to me now when midori is about to leave the show. i should not get invested in her and jules. but alas i fear it is too late. idk there is just something so sweet about them :(