#if you're an allo dating an aro

[nekropsii]

Wild how when I call Shipping Culture oppressively pervasive and awful for any Aro/Ace with the gall to enjoy anything on the Internet, I get called a Fun-Hating Killjoy and told to just shut the fuck up or off myself, no matter how mild or polite my comment is. Wild how when I say a character either is textually Aro/Ace or is easier to read as Aro/Ace than Alloromantic/sexual, people start talking down to me like I'm a child who doesn't know anything, saying "Friendly reminder that Aro(s)/Aces can Date/Have Sex too, just like us Normal People!". As if I don't know anything about my own identity. Wild how when I do either of these things or even just say I'm not into a pairing or uninvested in shipping in general people call me fucking homophobic, even if the (at least popularly perceived - let's be honest, people are wrong half the time) genders of the characters is never once made relevant. Even though their reasoning for me being homophobic is lack of investment in a gay pairing they like, and nothing more. Wild how people throw little baby tantrums at even the gentlest criticism of Shipping Culture, or someone choosing not to engage heavily in it. Wild how they have the audacity to ask, with hostility, what the fuck Aro(s)/Aces are talking about when they say Shipping Culture is hostile to Aro/Ace fans, or ask what's wrong with them when they say that they aren't into Shipping.

It's almost like Bigots don't realize they're being Bigots when they do Bigotry, so just saying you're not a Bigot isn't enough. It's almost like Aro/Ace people know what the hell they're talking about. It's almost like we have a fucking point. It's almost like we're valid in expressing contempt and frustration with the constant expectation to engage with Romance and Sexuality at every waking moment, even if we're Romance and/or Sex Favorable. It's almost like we're tired of getting our identities erased, and we're tired of expecting to "act normal", and we're tired of just taking it when Allos use the Favorable members of our communities as a scapegoat for why they should be allowed to totally erase any of our representation just for their "Harmless Queer Fun" - deliberately, and I mean DELIBERATELY, failing to recognize or acknowledge the character's orientation, and how an A-Spec's personal relationship with and expressions of Love are going to look drastically different from an Allo person's - and call us the Bigots when we even glance in the direction of objection.

It's almost like Allo/Amatonormativity are oppressive forces.

Alloromantics/sexuals are constantly looking for any reason they can to call Aro(s)/Aces unloving, unfeeling, frigid, soulless, cruel. Inhuman. They're looking for any reason they can to call us whiny children, stupid, people who "just haven't found the right one", addressing us only as "Works in Progress", or someone who can have their sexuality corrected with the right stimulus - Conversion Therapy and Corrective Rape are okay when it happens to us, after all. Any reason at all to call us heartless monsters. AlloAces are confused children. They can be fixed. AroAllos are manipulative, unfeeling sexual predators. They can't be fixed - just kill them. AroAces are frigid, mean bitches. They can be fixed. God forbid you're Aplatonic. God forbid you're part of the Repulsed spectrum. God forbid you're one of the Loveless. God forbid you hold any pride in your identity, God forbid you don't keep your mouth shut, God forbid you critique the overinflated importance Allos place onto Love as a concept. God forbid you critique something as asinine and juvenile as fucking Shipping Culture. Do any one of these and you've put a bright red, blazing neon target on your back.

Wild how the only real humans amongst us are the Romance, Sex, and Friendship Favorable who put their head down and mask as Allo, and side with the Allos when their fellow A-Specs get too loud for the comfort of their Allo friend's delicate little fee-fees. After all, Vitriol and Harassment are warranted when an Allo's feelings get slightly hurt that an Aro person says, on their own account, to no one in particular, that they're sick of every tag being 80% Shipping Content. Which is a vehemently evil personal attack, clearly.

Wild.

[redysetdare]

I would trust allo people more with shipping Aromantic characters if they actually treated it as an aromantic relationship instead of an allo relationship. You can't honestly think I'll believe when you say "They're still aro when i ship them!" and then show no signs of understanding or exploring how their aro identity affects their relationship outside of "I like dating and kissing" You can't honestly expect me to trust you actually support aromantic people when the only time you throw out support for aros is when you're saying "Aros can still date and enjoy romance!" because you want to ship an aro character.

I would trust Allo people more with aro characters if they stopped treating them like allo characters the moment they wanted them to kiss someone.

[bronzetomatoes]

If you're making posts abt how aro and ace ppl can still date and have sex respectively then you also understand that allo people might choose not to do either of those things, right? That sometimes people who are allosexual choose to be celibate, and that alloromantics can decide they're happier single? And that they're also not just waiting for the right person, and it doesn't mean there's an issue that needs resolving?

[aro-culture-is]

romance-averse aro culture is enjoying reading fanfic/books about romance, not minding your friends talking about their relationships, etc but at the same time getting repulsed when people ask you if you're dating someone or when something you do is "romantic" according to allos.

.

[papercranesandpride]

You know how we all agree that it's annoying and a problem just how much people throw around "aros can still date" and "aces can still have sex" because the implication is "don't worry, aro and ace people can still be normal and comply to societal norms about what is good?" You know how even though it is true and is a thing that individual aro and ace people should know, we also try not to say it too much because the allos take that, run wild with it, and use it as a chance to ignore our identities? You know how generally we're all pretty damn sick of those phrases?

Cool, so why is every other post I'm seeing right now about how you don't have to have sex, like sex, or be horny to be an alloaro? Like yeah. Obviously you don't. But as someone who does have unromantic sex a lot, for whom sexual attraction and desire and practice is a massive part of my life, it sure isn't great to know that my own community, the one group that out of everyone should be praising unromantic sex and standing up for it, is falling over themselves to make sure all the allos know that actually, being aroallo doesn't mean you have to be like me. I would think aroallos of all people would know better than to overemphasize that we don't all have sex. You know exactly how easily that gets turned into "oh good, being allosexual aromantic doesn't mean you're a sinning slut."

I sure am seeing a lot of emphasis put on how important it is that no one assume that aroallos are hypersexual or have high libido. And yes, don't make assumptions about any identity, but I don't like how much you all are willing to distance yourselves from people like me. I've seen it said much often that assuming alloaros are more sexual negative stereotype. It's a stereotype, yes, but it's only negative if you think having a lot of sex is a bad thing. Yeah, sure, being aroallo doesn't inherently make you more sexual than anyone else, but for me? I'm also aplatonic. Sexual attraction is all I have. Yes, I am more sexual than most people, and I don't appreciate being written off as a stereotype that people should ignore. That is some of our experiences as well.

Yes, you as an individual aromantic allosexual do not need to have sex. Please don't if you don't want to. But please also consider why it's so important that people don't think all alloaros are having casual sex. Please think about why it's such a big problem if allos assume you have a high sex drive. Why, exactly, is it such a problem if people do assume being alloaro means you're promiscuous? Let's look at those assumptions and unpack them.

[rjalker]

"what does not wanting to date have to do with being ace?!?!"

"what does not wanting to have sex with people have to do with being aro?!?!"

The current amisic stance is just as ridiculous as it sounds.

It's 2024 and people hate aroaces and non-SAM aros and aces so much they're literally trying to define us out of asexuality and aromanticism because they want the asexual and aromantic tags to literally be For Allos Only. I'm not even fucking joking.

the split attraction model is not mandatory. You literally do not ever get to demand people use it.

The asexual tag is for literally every single asexual person in existance. Not just allo aces.

the aromantic tags is for every single aromantic person I existance. Not just allo aros.

You do not get to ban aroaces and non-SAM aros and aces from using the main general tags for the fucking community just because you're allo and completely separate your romantic attraction from your sexual attraction.

Your experiences are not universal.

There is no fucking definition in existence that separates sexual and romantic attraction.

You literally do not have the right or ability to define other people's orientations or experiences to them.

"well I can easily separate my sexual attraction from romantic, so that means everyone can!"

No we fucking can't and newsflash, asshole, we're literally not even required to try! No other fucking orientation comes with the demand to forcibly separate sexual from romantic attraction. The fact that you think it's okay to demand this of aspec people just shows you're blatantly amisic.

The allo aros and allo ace tags exist. Use them if you hate seeing aroaces and non-SAM aros and aces existing so much.

If you hate seeing posts in the aromantic and asexual tags that don't conform to your personal definitions of asexuality and aromanticism that is literally just too fucking bad. Suck it up you whiny fucking self entitled brat. The world does not revolve around you.

If you hate aces and aros and aroaces so much you want to define us out of the aspec community to make sure allos are the only ones allowed...you will be the laughing stock of the whole fucking community. Get over yourself.

[cancerstanople]

As someone who used to identify as aromantic, I used to (and still do) struggle to differentiate between romantic and platonic attraction, here's my best explanation.

It's very similar to platonic attraction. You want to spend a lot of time with a person, you want to get to know them, you want to express affection for them.

The difference is in the intensity of it. With romantic attraction, you want to know their deepest secrets and show your affection for them RIGHT NOW. The feelings of love and attachment to this person are overwhelming and powerful clouders of judgement, especially at the onset of a crush or the start of a new relationship.

For the asexuals, this is why romantic and sexual attraction are perceived to be the same thing for most people, because sex is often thought of as the highest form of intimacy; it's a very intense, vulnerable, and physically close form of physical affection. But regardless of whether sex is a factor, the basis of romance is the desire to connect with someone as intimately and as quickly as possible.

Another difference is the duration of it. Feelings of friendship are generally very consistent, and can last long periods of time with less maintenance on the relationship itself. However, feelings of romantic attraction, while strong, are more short-lived. After the "honeymoon stage" of a relationship is over, the powerful, intoxicating feelings start to dissipate, and the lovers face a choice:

break up because the loss of the feeling means you're not motivated to keep the relationship going anymore

stay together and resign themselves to a more comfortable, platonic dynamic (I say "resign" not to mean that it's lesser than a passionate romance, just not as dramatic)

keep rekindling the fire, keep finding new ways to express affection or new things to discover about each other

When I explained it to myself in this way, it helped me understand why there are so many seemingly nonsensical rituals and customs surrounding dating and relationships: it's an attempt to regulate it. Romantic attraction is a very volatile feeling; it's strong, it blocks off your rationality, and it doesn't last a long time with the same person if you don't know how to keep it up. This means it has the potential to cause a lot of strife and maybe cause physical pain if there are no rules of engagement (engagement lol, pun not intended). So we have practices of dates, and marriage, and social mores about how to interact with each other in order to pace ourselves.

This is how I interpret it, at least. Other allos, feel free to add your own perspectives or shit on mine if yours is completely different. I'm still young, so my view on it is probably immature, but I think it's a good basis for future conversation, at least.

For the aros reading this, I hope it was helpful!

[green-enby]

Heyo! Have you watched Koisenu Futari (恋せぬふたり, Two people who can't fall in love) yet? It's a great series, just 8 episodes long! I binged it in one day :) [smiley]

It focuses on two aromantic asexual people living together. This is a little appreciation post, containing some thoughts that it evoked in me as an aroace.

If you don't want spoilers, please don't read!

It's so relatable how Sakuko keeps blaming herself all throughout the show… Insecurity stemming from societal expectations that dictate romance is for everyone, and that people who don't date are somehow "failing" in life; I think this affects allos as well.

When I broke off my romantic relationship, I too felt like it had been my fault, for not having been a good enough partner, for not being able to love them in the same way they loved me.

To finally learn that you are not "defective", that there's other people like you…! I love how the two MCs don't grieve their lack of attraction; Sakuko is perfectly happy discovering she's aroace. She and Takahashi are living their "best life" together.

Sure, many aroaces do wish they were allo, and that needs to be represented too, but this series to me really shined a light over why they want that: it's because amatonormativity is rampant in the world, not because lacking attraction is inherently sad. The main conflicts in the series stem from the clash between allo society and the aroace experience, after all. I think that's neat! It gave me a good dose of aroace joy—while still showing the hurts that come with it, realistically—and I really needed it.

I didn't expect her to come out to her family so soon, but whoa, that was intense. Her mother's negative reaction is what all people who exclude a-spec people from the LGBTQIA+ community should see, to understand that we face the same issues they do.

I haven't come out to my parents as aroace yet, and watching this made me realize how awful it actually feels to be in the closet. I somehow hadn't realized I am. I've always felt safe coming out to them as other things, as bisexual back in the day, and as trans non-binary.

It might be because my confidence disappeared when they reacted badly both times, but this coming out feels almost impossible.

Comparing it to coming out as bi, it's really not that different: if you're bi, you're promiscuous and date too many people; if you're aroace, you're a prude and cold-hearted. If you break away from the status quo, you're wrong either way.

But at least, most people do eventually understand the bi experience, if they understand same-gender attraction, and fuse it with straightness, even though it's a flawed method.

With aros and aces, instead, it's such an alien concept for an allo, which makes it way harder to come out and have to explain to them how to deconstruct allo-amatonormativity. It's exhausting. Thankfully, there's people like Kazu who are actually willing to learn about us. That gives me hope.

I feel like it's super eye-opening to find out the concept of romance didn't even exist in the past. Pretty sure that in Europe, it originated during the Middle Ages from the ideal of chivalry. So it's really just a social construct, and opting out of it shouldn't be so controversial!

It's just a set of pointless, annoying rules like having to kiss eachother, having to say "I love you", and doing it all a set amount of times, otherwise it's not good enough. What if we don't want to? What if it doesn't come natural to us? If it's just a social construct, fuck it, I'm not adhering to that! We do whatever makes us happy!

Even in the series itself, Sakuko too goes through a heartbreak, even if it's not the romantic kind: she valued her friendship and future cohabitation with Chizuru above all else, but Chizuru abandoned her, because of romantic love. It's not true that aroaces have it easy.

Like our MC, we have to deal with fear that we'll come off flirty when we're just being friendly, confusion over concepts that we feel we should understand, shame over the fact that we're different, fear of loneliness, frustration and pain that we'll always come second to our friends' romantic partners, or even trauma from a relationship or sexual encounter that we didn't really want. I could go on and on.

These last scenes really got to me. Especially the second one… I admit that I cried, when she had to turn her down, and it seemed like her aromanticism had ruined their relationship. It hurts that the way I am could seriously harm someone I care about. It hurts that most people work differently and that they can't help it, and that we can't help it either. I don't like being put in that position, to cause someone a heartbreak. I have with my ex, and had to watch them spiral down… It was horrible.

Still, I wouldn't change my orientation for the world. I'm confident in my identity, I love being aroace.

In the end, we can all reach our full potential, reach a point where we feel fulfilled and that we're living our best life, find ourselves a family if it's what we want, have our dream job and house. Being aroace doesn't condemn us to a life of unhappiness. That's what this series left me with by the end; it gave me so much hope for my future.

(I'm aware I'm coming off as a bit toxically positive here haha, sorry if I'm striking a bad chord; I'm just in a really good period right now, and riding this wave for as long as I can! Hopefully I can rub it off someone else as well.)

That said, I really loved this j-drama, it was funny and relatable and emotional, I wished it had lasted longer! It seems like the author isn't even aroace herself, so I'm amazed at how good the representation was! So much thought and research has gone into it, and it shows; the result is amazing.

Thanks for reading my scattered thoughts about this! 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

[genderkoolaid]

yeah im a aro-spec lesbian and ive literally been told that im 'reinforcing the predatory lesbian stereotype' bc i still sleep w/ ppl even tho im not really interested in dating rn. it doesnt matter that there are plenty of other lesbians that have casual sex, but apparently thats fine since they can fall in love but its bad when i do it bc im just 'using ppl' and 'have commitment issues'. even tho the women i sleep w/ all know and are fine w/ there not being any potential romance. but yeah amatonormativity totally isnt a problem in the lesbian community 🙄

yeah godddd even in queer spaces im super hesitant about being openly aro. cause casual sex/FWB is all fun and quirky when you're assumed to be allo and will eventually get a romantic partner/view casual sex as a gateway to romance. but if you are openly aro and want casual sex/FWB/sexual friendship/etc. then you are reinforcing stereotypes/internalized homophobia/traumatized/commitment issues/a heartless slut preying on allo people (who have feelings while we don't because we're incapable of love or being hurt!)

i think a lot of allo people don't understand that there is a difference in how people treat someone whose "taking a break from dating/sex to focus on themself" or "just having fun and letting off steam" and an aro/ace person just. existing and doing anything at all. if i told people i was taking a break from dating pr wasn't looking for anything serious right now they'd be totally chill, but say i don't feel romantic attraction, never want a romantic relationship and my ideal relationship is "friends with benefits"? suddenly they treat me like i'm a dr. phil guest.

and its bitterly ironic for the exact reason you mentioned: allos accuse us of "leading people on" and tend to assume we're going to be somehow toxic or abusive or predatory in relationships. and so we'll be so painfully clear about what we want and don't want and get confirmation that its okay a million times.... and then our allo lovers will get mad at us for not being okay with things we explicitly said we weren't okay with, and for not falling in love despite our explicit explanation that we don't fall in love.

[leidensygdom]

re: my last post, but since this always kinda comes up what's actually like to be an ace person with no interest for sex, lemme easily sum it up

I am a sex repulsed person dating a sex neutral person, we've been in a relationship for 2 years. I'm probably somewhere on the aro spectrum as well, or at least I do feel quite disconnected with how the usual for romantic relationships runs.

We've had people poke at our relationship over and over- Surely two ace people who aren't interested about sex have something weird. People tend to think we simply run a very very secret sexual life, or we are maybe lying about it, or we are ultra repressed. Or celibacy, that's always fun too, there's gotta be some religious reason on why two people who are dating and living together aren't going at it-

Now, I won't ever get into the usual morbid curiosity people tend to have about ace people. Asexuality is often kinda tied to "victim of SA" and so on by allo people. Some are, some don't. Not something I need to share.

So, now. What is sex in our relationship? Imagine you suggest your partner to maybe go open your favourite game of choice, or rolling in wet dirt for a couple of hours. Not to judge someone who would like to roll in wet dirt, but the idea is unappealing to both of us. Gaming is far more fun. We could be being stupid in Terraria. Or maybe we could go out and have dinner, or maybe roll in wet dirt for two hours. We like eating out, we don't like rolling in wet dirt. We go eat out.

Rolling in wet dirt is not something you'd feel like doing, ever. It isn't in the back of our minds. Some people absolutely love it, the world is plastered with it, people for some reason tell you that "rolling in wet dirt" is in their minds, and you're like, "that's kinda odd, I can't imagine actively thinking about that?", but it's okay, you just don't do it. It isn't even a checklist or something you're even curious about trying. There's plenty of other things out there you don't wanna do- Maybe eating a brain seems super unappealing while others swear by it. Maybe bungee jumping is all exciting to some, but it's just not something you ever wanna do it yourself.

So, well, there we go. That's what sex is to us. It's one activity we just don't have interest for, the same way that rolling in wet dirt is not something we ever plan to do. There isn't a grand secret we're hiding, it's extremely simple in fact. being ace is often actually kind of unexciting, according to aros. But I gotta say I'm quite excited about having a Terraria session tonight.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

(aro ask)

I guess I'd just like to hear about other people's experiences, and what it feels like for them, to get a point of reference for my own feelings.

Feel free to ignore this if not, but if you're cool with giving more specific advice: My partner is allo, and I worry that it's selfish of me to want to be with them because our relationship makes me happy as it is now, but we have different wants and ideas about what relationships mean long term. I can't imagine any relationship lasting forever for me, while that seems like something they very much do want. I know I need to talk to them about this, more than we already have, but I guess I don't know how to have that conversation without it feeling like I'm telling them I don't want or care about them.

hello anon,

I am going to let you, my beautiful aro sibling, in one some hot secret sauce: what you are describing is not an aro-exclusive conundrum.

I mean, sure, your doubts about the possibility of a long-term relationship are influenced by you being aro, for sure. who you are matters. but the actual problem here is not that you are aromantic, it's that you and someone you care about have different ideas about the potential longevity of your relationship.

(or you might, anyway. you said it seems like your partner wants forever, but do you know? they might not be thinking past last month. you're right, you do need to talk about that more.)

listen: people are in relationships that aren't forever all the time. if you think about it, relationships can actually only end in two ways: you break up or one of you dies. I think, statistically, a lot more relationships probably end in breakups than death. certainly that has to be the case in our heathen divorce-loving late marriage modern society, right? and that's fine. a relationship isn't a failure just because you didn't die in bed together like those old guys from Titanic; it can be beautiful and fulfilling and meaningful and important without being forever.

the point being that it's not selfish to date someone without the intent of dying together at the tender age of 103. but you guys do absolutely need to acknowledge that you might have very different ideas about what the future of your relationship and have the hard and honest convos that will help you figure out how to align those visions with your reality in a way that is, hopefully, not destructive to either of you.

as always I am gesturing to my pinned FAQ and specifically the relationship advice "talk about it or break up."

[ellilyre]

Reyna is aro/aroace and you shouldn't ship her

(by an aro guy)(please read (especially if you ship her romantically)

(simple lexicon : aromantic = little/no romantic attraction. asexual = little/no sexual attraction. alloromantic = average romantic attraction.)

Here I mostly talk about aromantism bc 1)as its children books there are not mentions of sexual attractions 2)I am aro but not ace, and I do not want to talk for a community I am not part of.

I can't find the screenshot but Rick said she's ace. Ace ≠ aro, but I wouldn't be surprised if Rick (a white cishet man (love him tho)) doesn't know the difference between the 2 (just like many queer ppl active within the community). So I assume he means she's aroace.

The discourse she has in ToA where she explains she doesn't need a romo partner is the most aro-coded thing I've ever seen a character said. I teared up because it's the first time I see a character actually vocalizing what I feel.

Shipping Reyna romantically is just like shipping Nico with a woman.

"But aro ppl can still date !"

Yes they can (i have dated romantically both before and after figuring out my aromantism). The questions "can we ship aro characters" is often talked about in the aro community, and one answer often comes up :

Most aro ppl are not comfortable with allo ppl shipping aro characters.

To me, this sentence feels like an excuse to ship her and ignore what aromantic is (in most cases) about. You want to give her the label so you're inclusive and an ally, but you don't want to commit to it and actually address her identity bc it would change from your habits (shipping).

You have every character. You can take any characters and ship them. There are less a-spect characters than homo/bi/trans characters. Often, if we call a character aro-coded we get called homophobic for "ignoring" the bond they have with a same-sex character (that could very well be platonic). In 19 years, Reyna is the first character that I actually can relate to.

Why can't Reyna's identity be as important and respected as Nico's ? Do you only care about queer representation when it work for your ships ? Do your support stops when the identities are not longer "fun" ? I am genuinely asking these questions.

Do not erase her identity and what she represents for many people. Shipping is less important than queer representation.

[margaretthatchersdead]

The fact that the bitching about aros has been going on for so long but people refuse to get new material. Honestly if nothing else it's just lazy and boring. Compare what people were saying a decade ago to now and it's the exact same.

"Oh but what about the aro cishet man who just uses women?" Gee, what if. At the end of the day, if you think someone feeling romantic attraction means they have a greater level of respect for people, you're really weird. Through this logic are all gay men misogynist? I mean considering how the people saying this tend to be terfs, they probably do also think that. The logic does imply that allo cishet men would be some of the greatest respecters of women and I don't think reality reflects that ngl.

"You're not queer just because you don't want to date women" Yeah I don't think you get how sexuality works bestie. "Want" isn't really how that one goes.

"You're still straight even if you don't wanna fuck" We're still on the conflating of aro and ace apparently. So many years to be educated and you've neglected to even learn the meaning of two words. Truly aro exclusionists are on another level.

"Well if they're a guy and they don't want to fuck men then they aren't lgbt" Interesting use of "lgbt" there when implying the only way any guy could be queer would be an attraction to men. I'm sure there's no other reasons whatsoever a guy could be queer.

Like it would still be bad if there was new material but at the very least I could have something for entertainment value.

[dross-the-fish]

If your partner is aro and you're ace how does that work? If you don't mind my asking.

I guess to some people it can look a bit odd. We don't go on dates, hold hands, cuddle or have sex in the way a typical couple might, instead we hang out, talk for hours, have a thousand in-jokes. We build halloween props together, visit haunted houses, see whatever sights we can afford to and buy each other presents because we're each other's favorite people. We take care of each other if one of us gets sick, we've seen each other through our hardest times and shared traumas. I was there through his entire transition when he realized he was FtM and he was the first person I came out as queer to. I also like that I don't feel pressured to ever have to have sex and he doesn't feel like he has to pretend he has a type of emotional connection he doesn't. We are just two best friends living together and committed to each other and honestly it's made us happier than trying to function in conventional relationships. We've been told what we have isn't real, that a queer platonic thing isn't going to work but we're 11 years in. I don't think what we have is any less than what normal allo couples have.

[fun-k-boards]

'Guys, remember! All relationships are valid, unless you don't want to be in one then you should kill yourself. All sex is valid, unless you don't want it then you should kill yourself. All people in fandom are valid, unless you're sex or romance repulsed then you should kill yourself. All character headcanons are valid, unless you headcanon them as sex or romance repulsed, then you should kill yourself.'

This is basically how allos act whenever aro romance repulsed and ace sex repulsed people exist in fandom space, or aro romance repulsed and ace sex repulsed characters exist in general. You're all annoying to be honest. 'aro people can still date/ace people can still have sex! As long as you respect them as aro/ace then it's ok UwU :33' they're repulsed so you can't even respect them as aroace you dumbass. You absolute goddamn moron. I'm so, so sick of you idiots.

[aro-culture-is]

Aro culture is hcing characters out of spite.

Oh, this character can't be aro because they've had a dating history? They just called to tell me you're full of shit and that their obnoxiously huge aro flag shipped today.

You say making this character aro is reinforcing stereotypes? Too late, they just received an outpouring of support from their peers after coming out.

Oh, this character is too young to be aro? Their guardians are aro too, now.

Every bitchy allo only fuels our arofication beam. Soon the world will be greener than it's ever been >:)

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