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sunsetscurving · 5 years ago

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honey, you should see me in a crown [modern royalty AU]

CHAPTER 2 || ao3 link

Lucas Lallemant, crown prince and heir to the throne, never needed someone to protect him. He never needed someone to protect him until the day he nearly got stabbed by an assassin.

Now he has to deal with an annoying bodyguard named Eliott Demaury who is, to the chagrin of Lucas, fucking handsome too.

As if his life isn’t difficult enough already.

Lucas waited in front of the palace, a little smile on his face. He always felt rebellious whenever he snuck out of the castle, meeting his friends in the deepest night and having some fun, some distraction from the royal life around him. He didn’t get to see his friends very often but when they decided to roam around the city, it was always a little adventure for Lucas. The guards usually didn’t know when he snuck out, Lucas found a way to disappear from the castle for some hours unseen until the guards would search the whole city for him. He actually didn’t want to go out in the next days after this… incident. But with the arrival of his bodyguard loaming at the back of his head, he had to use the last bit of freedom as long as he could.

Lucas leaned against the wall, the hood from his sweater drawn inside his face so that people wouldn’t recognize him on the street. He was standing in the shadow of the castle and his smirk only deepened as he heard hushed voices and saw three figures moving through the dark, approaching him as quiet as they could. Lucas pushed himself off of the wall and walked towards them, a grin on all of their faces now.

“I thought you already started without me”, whispered Lucas into the night as he reached his friends. They all greeted each other with a handshake combined with a hug and Yann, Lucas’ best friend, ruffled through his hair under the hood.

“We would never dare to do such a thing, your highness”, whispered Basile back and giggled, Lucas rolling his eyes. Basile and all the others knew how much Lucas hated it to be called like this but they had their fun mocking him. And Lucas would rather get mocked by them than not being able to talk with them at all.

“Someone got the weed?”, asked Lucas and looked at all of them and Yann wiggled his eyebrows, pulling out the stuff and showing it into the round. Lucas’ smile deepened as he threw his arms around Yann’s shoulders.

“We don’t have a lot time before the guards will discover my absence. Let’s make every second count.”

“Minute by minute”, answered Arthur with a smile. That was their thing, living from minute to minute and not wasting anything in between. It had a much deeper meaning for Lucas but he was glad to share this kind of a life motto with his friends.

“Minute by minute”, repeated the little group and with quiet laughter, they set off into the night, ready to find a place to get wasted and to lose control for one night, for some precious hours.

These were the times were Lucas truly felt alive.

Lucas danced the night away, a beer in his hands surrounded by his friends and music which he could feel reverberating in his bones. These moments were so rare that he drunk them in like air. He smiled, laying his head back while singing the words to the song which was playing in the club they were currently in.

“So, you’re getting a bodyguard, Lulu?”, screamed Yann over the loud music and with one sentence, he was back into the reality again.

Lucas groaned, looking at his best friend and Arthur rolled his eyes.

“Lucas wanted to get wasted tonight and not talk about his royal life”, said Arthur and nudged Yann on his shoulder. Yann lifted his hands innocently, looking over to Lucas again.

“I only want to know what’s going on in the royal life of my best friend.”

Lucas sighed and took a sip from his beer, moving along to the music the whole time.

“Yeah, I’m getting a bodyguard and the last freedom of mine will be gone too.”

“Maybe he’s young and hot.”

Lucas raised his eyebrows as he looked at Basile. They all knew about Lucas’ sexuality and totally supported him in this.

“Maybe he’s old and grumpy”, answered Lucas and the others couldn’t hide a smile from their face.

“Old and grumpy Mister bodyguard will have a lot of fun with young and grumpy Lucas”, said Yann with a grin and took Lucas’ empty glass, “I’m gonna get some more beer for you. Maybe it’s our last time being out for a long time.”

Lucas really hoped that Yann was wrong this time.

Yann disappeared in the crowd and Arthur, Basile and Lucas danced to the new song which was blasting out of the speakers now. Lucas loved this song and jumped with his friends, turning and spinning and laughing. Lucas turned around and his gaze flew over the crowd of young people having fun and dancing.

And suddenly, everything seemed to stop.

Lucas’ eyes landed on a guy who was directly looking at him, dancing with his friends who apparently were talking to him. But he didn’t focus on them – he was focused on Lucas. Normally, Lucas would look away now, hide his face and his body behind his friends. But the stranger didn’t seem to recognize that he was the prince. Usually, no one ever recognized him, to be honest.

And Lucas really didn’t want to take away his eyes from this fucking hot man.

He had messy hair and his eyes seemed glassy, probably from all the alcohol he already had. He was lifting his hand now, driving it through this messy hair of his and Lucas felt things inside of him while some kind of heat was rising inside of him. Lucas was biting his lips, a smirk now on his face while he literally made out with this stranger through eye contact.

This is fucking hot. He is fucking hot.

The other one didn’t take his eyes away from Lucas and Lucas felt himself drawn towards this boy. He wanted to lay his hands on the other ones hips, pull him closer, lay his lips on his sharp jawbones and—

“Lucas, we need to leave.”

Lucas hadn’t listened to anything his friends had been saying for the past few minutes, he was way to occupied with eyefucking this stranger. But as he heard this words, he turned around to Yann who seemed to be breathless.

“What?”

“The guards. They are already searching for you in different clubs.” Yann pulled Lucas towards the exit by his sleeve, “We have to leave. Now.”

Lucas couldn’t argue against this put he ripped himself away from Yann’s grip, turning around one last time to look at the stranger, to maybe memorize his face and find him again.

But he was gone.

Lucas’ felt something go cold inside of him.

“Lucas, let’s go”, hissed Yann and pulled Lucas out of the club. And maybe it was better that the hot stranger wasn’t there anymore.

Lucas couldn’t have left this easily otherwise.

“I don’t want to go home”, said Lucas with a laugh while all of them stumbled through the night, clearly drunk as fuck. But Lucas loved these nights – no protocol, no need to be the perfect heir to the throne, no need to behave. Only the constant pressure of the guards finding him was always kind of… stressing.

“Yeah, I also wouldn’t want to go home to a palace where every wishe will come true within seconds.”

“Shut the fuck up, Basile”, said Lucas and stumbled, taking a sip from the bottle of wine which Arthur had been carrying around the whole time, “If you want to trade places and become the prince of our country with people telling you what to do and how to behave the whole time, I would gladly do it.”

“I’ll pass”, answered Basile with a dumb laugh and Lucas passed the bottle to Arthur and Yann.

“Messieurs? May I see your ID please?”

Lucas hadn’t even seen the police at the end of the alley. And as he looked over to Basile, Yann and Arthur, he realized that he wasn’t the only one who was surprised by the officers standing in front of them now. They were not looking very friendly, one of them stretching his hand out to grab the ID of them.

And Lucas, being all drunk and happy in his little cloud, felt brave.

He pushed Yann, the oldest from all of them, aside and took position in front of the police officers, the bottle of wine still in his hand.

“Why?”

The officer looked down on Lucas as if he would watch an annoying insect.

“Because I said so.”

“Don’t you know who I am?”, asked Lucas while raising his eyebrows, the boys behind him being too drunk to stop Lucas from behaving this way. They only chuckled, Lucas tilting his head to the right side slightly to show them where to run off to in some seconds.

“You’re a drunk boy, probably underage and I want to see your ID. Now.”

But Lucas only grinned, being a little asshole because he actually knew that fucking with the police was really, really dumb.

“I’m the prince. I don’t need to show you anything, dudes.”

And with that, the group took off, laughing and running into the night. Their footsteps were echoing on the walls around them and their laughs flew through the night. Lucas heard how the police started to chase them. He looked over his shoulder and the rush of adrenaline made him laugh out loud again.

“We should separate!”, screamed Yann with a hint of a slur and all of them agreed on that.

“See you later, your highness”, called Arthur with a wink and as a crossroad came into sight, all of them took on a different direction. Lucas still felt the rush of adrenaline in his body but he also slowly felt how his strength was fading away, not having trained in weeks. He ran through the night, towards the castle and looked over his shoulder now and then. And suddenly, he saw how the officers rounded the corner and were still after him.

“Fuck this shit”, murmured Lucas. Couldn’t they have run after the other three of them? Lucas rolled his eyes and tried to mobilize his last strength, but as he turned his head around to look ahead of him again he suddenly realized what he got himself into.

He just ran into a dead end.

He stared at the big wall looming in front of him, the night getting thicker and thicker around him.

Okay, now he was really fucked.

“Hey! You, stop this!”

Lucas looked around with some kind of panic in his throat.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fu—”

And suddenly, he was pulled into darkness. Lucas stumbled and followed the person who just grabbed his arm and pulled him through a little passage which couldn’t be seen on the first glance. And which hopefully couldn’t be seen by the officers too. His savior was much taller than him and Lucas’ hand fitted perfectly into the other one’s hand. And when they finally entered another street and the light from the street lamps flooded the darkness, Lucas came to a stop and tried to catch his breath.

“Oh fuck, this was close”, murmured Lucas who was leaning against a wall while his savior was also trying to catch his breath. He still looked around as if to check that they really got away from the police. But they were alone on this little street.

“True”, said the other one and Lucas looked up, already mesmerized by this soft and smooth voice.

Only then Lucas realized, that they were still holding hands. And Lucas wasn’t ready to let go just yet.

“And you are—”

Lucas was just about to ask for the name of his hero as the other one turned his head and the light illuminated his face. And Lucas’ breath nearly caught in his throat.

It was him.

The beautiful boy from the club,

The boy who just disappeared without Lucas getting a last glance on him.

The boy who just saved him.

A smile, a big and wide smile, was spreading on Lucas’ face.

“Couldn’t let you go without asking for your name at least”, answered the stranger with a grin as Lucas recognized him and Lucas’ was already totally captured by his presence, by his smile and by these beautiful eyes. He was even more handsome this close and Lucas was not sure who gave him the permission to look like that.

And the other one didn’t seem to know that he was standing in front of the prince.

And Lucas was really glad for this.

Often, people only wanted to get to know him because of his title. But this man, this man saved him because he found him attractive and because they literally made out with their eyes.

This night couldn’t be any more perfect.

“I’m Eliott”, said the stranger now and took away his hand from Lucas’ only to stretch it out and shake Lucas’ hand again. Lucas chuckled quietly, the alcohol slowly fading away from his mind and brain.

“Thank you for saving my ass, Eliott.”

“You have a cute ass, so, you’re welcome.”

Lucas grinned at his boldness. It was a welcome change to the usual bootlicker he was surrounded with.

Lucas just opened his mouth to reply with something as he heard the bells from the palace.

Oh shit.

Now, he was really, really, really fucked.

Eliott frowned, looking up to the castle who was looming over the city.

“The prince seems to be missing”, murmured Eliott and Lucas slowly, very slowly, backed away from Eliott. He didn’t want to leave him, he really didn’t want to. He wanted to know him better and the sexual tension between them was undeniable. But he didn’t want to pull Eliott into the mess of his life. So he had to leave.

“I gotta go”, said Lucas now, several steps away from Eliott already and the frown of the other boy deepened as he looked back to Lucas. He took some steps towards Lucas and it broke Lucas’ heart a tiny bit to see Eliott feeling the same as he felt.

“Will I see you again?”, asked Eliott and Lucas could just not say no to this.

“Hopefully”, answered Lucas while still walking backwards, looking into Eliott’s eyes the whole time. He felt something inside of him, something he hasn’t felt in years, maybe something he hasn’t felt after all. He was not someone who just fell for strangers, for people he met at the disco, for people who rescued him from the police, for people who pulled him into fully with just their mere presence.

But here he was nevertheless, feeling like saying goodbye to the biggest opportunity in life till now.

“Tell me your name at least”, called Eliott now over the distance between them, Lucas already being several steps away from him. Lucas didn’t want to lie anymore. And he was glad that his name was not the most exotic thing ever.

“Lucas”, said he and grinned, the other one smiling now too. And, oh my, what a smile it was.

“Just call me Lucas.”

#thank you all SO MUCH for your support omg #i cannot wait to share this story with you guys #skam france #lucas lallemant #eliott demaury #skam france fanfic #skam france fanfiction #elu fic #elu fanfic #elucrownfanfiction

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harryseyebrows · 5 years ago

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Hmm I dunno. Maybe he asks Jeff if he wants to be in the delivery room with him, and Jeff is like ... do u want me there?? And then Harry’s like um yeah obviously. Or there could be something more climactic. Like Harry goes out for dinner with a male friend, and Jeff gets sort of twitchy and weird and jealous. And they get in a fight when Harry gets home, like Jeff makes a comment about their sleeping situation and Harry’s “date” and Harry’s like “it wasn’t a date because I love YOU”

why not BOTH. so harry has to decide like.. how he wants to do things lol and because jeff goes with him to is appointments, jeff is present when harry discusses it with his OB. c-section? he’d rather not; major abdominal surgery just really lacks appeal for him. epidural? yes, because he’d like to avoid as much pain as possible. hospital or birthing center? a hospital makes him feel more safe, but he won’t exclude the possibility of a center, either. all of these things make jeff’s head spin a bit, because it’s really happening. not right now, obviously. but there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. they’re going to have a baby. one little person thats made up of all the little parts of the two of them. he can barely wrap his head around it. but harry’s sitting next to him, casually talking about ‘bearing down like you’re having a bowel movement’ and its just totally bizarre. a baby. the whole process seems really intense and scary and embarrassing and he knows that harry isnt a very shy person but he wonders if he’ll want jeff in the room with him. so he asks. and a mild argument ensues but NO DRAMATIC REVEALS YET!!!

perhaps when harry goes on his little outing, he’s roughly 8 months and some weeks along. thoroughly pregnant. while he’s getting ready, jeff makes some comment like ‘are you sure you should be going out like that?’ because its january in london (harry wanted to have the baby at home - not LA home, but home home; and of course, jeff followed) and it’s slippery out and cold and well. jeff just really doesnt like the idea of harry going out with some random guy (he’s not actually a random guy, he’s a small-scale producer that harry is considering working with) when he’s carrying their baby. harry, for his part, mostly ignores jeff’s sourness. he gets dressed in relative silence - he doesn’t ask for help when he tries to wiggle into his elastic waist jeans, even though he almost falls over twice. he simply slips on his coat and boots and leaves with a curt, ‘there’s stuff for pasta in the cabinet.’ jeff tries to watch TV while he’s gone, but he’s too restless to focus. can’t stop thinking about harry and that guy, blake or brian, whatever his name is, putting his hand on harry’s forearm or touching his lower back. he does end up making pasta and it helps distract him a bit, but his mind is still going a mile a minute. he’s mostly relaxed until harry walks through the door two hours later and then jeff’s frustration and doubt and anger, if he’s being honest, are all renewed, fresh like a recently picked scab.

‘have fun?’ he asks, voice snide and mean in a way he never is with harry. ever.

harry is in the middle of putting his coat on a hanger. ‘what?’ he asks, eyebrows furrowing. his cheeks are very pink, from the cold. he should’ve worn a scarf.

‘on your little date. did you have fun?’ jeff places extra emphasis on the word ‘date’, lets it clang out of his mouth like a bullet.

harry rounds on him. he wobbles for a second because his center of balance has been off since month five, but he casts an imposing figure, his green eyes turned hard and fiery. that’s another thing that’s changed. Pregnant Harry is different from Not-Pregnant Harry; now he always seems ready for a fight.

‘excuse me?’

jeff shrugs, feigning innocence. ‘is he nice? did he pick up the bill?’

harry’s boots clack loudly on the hardwood as he storms over to where jeff is sitting. ‘what’s your problem?’

‘just looking out. wanna make sure that we get the vetting process done early. so that when you guys start playing house we don’t run into any surprises.’

he doesn’t know where any of this is coming from. everything is oozing out of him like lava - hot and molten and burning. he watches as harry visibly flinches, stung.

‘you’re being an asshole right now,’ harry spits, and jeff catches the moment his lower lip starts to tremble. ‘it was a business meeting. i wanted to talk to him about doing a song, you absolute dickhead.’

jeff wants to wash himself down a sink and turn on the garbage disposal. he knew all of that. really, he did. but he had to go ahead and let his insecurities get the best of him. and now he’s made harry upset.

he stands and puts his hands up in surrender. ‘h…’ he tries, but harry shakes his head.

‘no. don’t touch me. don’t even– i don’t even want to look at you right now.’

jeff feels that like a punch to his solar plexus. he nods, because he deserves it.

‘listen. i’m sorry. i shouldn’t– i didn’t mean those things.’

harry’s eyes are glistening now, and he hastily scrubs at them before any tears can fall, turning so block jeff’s view. ‘yes you did. otherwise you wouldn’t have said them.’

jeff swallows. ‘well. i shouldn’t have said them. it’s not fair to you. i– even if it wasn’t just… for business. you’re like. allowed to see people.’

out of everything, that gets harry’s attention the most. his head whips around so quick jeff worries about him snapping his neck. he sounds borderline hysterical. ‘what?’

‘i just–’

‘what are you on about? do you hear yourself?’

‘you–’

‘no. be quiet. you’ve done enough talking,’ harry says, chest heaving as he breathes quickly. ‘i dont know if you’ve noticed or not, but im pregnant. im having your baby. we moved in together! we literally live under the same roof. sleep in the same bed. i make you coffee in the morning. and im not doing that because i want to play house. i do it because i–’ his face scrunches up. he looks at the ground and lets out a huff of humorless laughter. ‘because i love you. not anyone else. you.’

jeff drops heavily back onto the couch. he puts his head in his hands. can’t believe how badly he’s fucked this up. because surely harry can’t mean present tense. no, after this? jeff might as well start packing his bags now.

‘harry,’ jeff says to his own socked feet. ‘im sorry.’

harry doesn’t move. doesn’t make a sound. he lets jeff marinate in his own gloriously-proportioned mistake.

jeff continues, chancing a glance upwards. ‘i can go. if you want. im sure you dont want me around right now.’

harry sighs and throws his arms up in exasperation. ‘did you not listen to one thing i just said?’

‘but–’

‘i only want you around. that’s the whole point. even when you make me really, really fucking mad and say stupid, shitty things.’

this is it. jeff wrings his hands together. he stands up and takes a few steps forward, but leaves some space between them. his whole body is tingling, both from harry’s admission and his own, that’s sitting just on the tip of his tongue, ready to be catapulted out there into the open.

‘i–’ his voice nearly breaks. he swallows and tries again. ‘i love you. too. i mean, in general.’

harry’s still royally pissed - jeff can feel it coming off him in waves - but he can’t conceal the way his lips wobble as he tries to fight a smile.

‘you’re an idiot,’ he says. ‘a complete idiot. i cook you dinner and ask to cuddle all the time and wash your hair in the shower sometimes. and you thought i was doing all of that, for what? just to be nice?’

‘i didnt know what to think! one minute you’re all comely and sweet, and the next you’re yelling at me because i put a spoon in the wrong drawer.’

‘ive got a baby sitting on my bladder! im hormonal! and you’re the one who did it to me!’

jeff’s throat goes dry. now is not the time to be thinking about that.

in a few short strides, harry closes the gap between them. well, as much as he can when he has almost a whole foot of belly jutting out from his middle. he grabs jeff by the wrist and brings his hand to the curve of his stomach, just under his ribs. it only takes a few seconds for jeff to feel tiny thumps under his palm and fingers.

harry cups him around the back of his neck with his free hand. up against jeff’s ear, he softly says, ‘even without this… without them. id still love you.’

jeff presses his forehead against harry’s. ‘i didn’t ruin things, did i?’

harry moves jeff’s hand, so it’s resting over his heart instead. ‘no. this is yours, too.’

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THATS THE SAPPIEST SHIT IVE EVER WRITTEN OH MY GODDDDDDDDDD IM GONNA PUKE!!!!!!!!!!!

#my fic #Anonymous

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agustdef · 5 years ago

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Here & Now - Chapter 7

Pairing: Yoongi x OC

Genre: Fluff; Chill romance

Word Count: 1,758

Warning: None.

Banner Marker: @dee-ehn

A lunchtime excursion is what I needed after a jam-packed morning. I’d been in New York for a week because of my other job and I was half excited and half drained. I’d come for a book convention of sorts, but I’d been attending other book-related things the entire time too. Meeting my agent, meeting with other authors, meeting with editors and just going to mixers. It was a lot.

I loved every solitary second of it though.

On day two of the con, my book friends and I had snuck away to have lunch at a rooftop bar we liked. Food and drinks were spread across the table as we ate and relaxed.

Some drank and some didn’t, me being part of the later even though I craved one glass of wine. It helped my mind decompress faster without getting me even slightly tipsy. But I’d put myself on a ban until later.

“Kendall, you’ve been eyeing the rosé for like ten minutes. Just get a glass already,” Sol, an editor friend, said.

I blinked rapidly and shook my head. Looking down at my orange juice I frowned but drank it anyway.

She huffed, probably over my nonsense. “Why not?”

I’d known her longer than anyone and she’d seen me drunk many times, so she knew why. “I can’t risk me turning sleepy instead of energetic. You know I have that panel.”

In the afternoon I’d agreed to do a panel on diversity in fantasy, that was by some miracle filled with POC whose identities were intersectional. We’d be having an actual conversation about how we built our worlds. And hopefully, it wouldn’t get derailed by an audience member.

After that I planned to drink, because I enjoyed it in a not getting wasted capacity and I hadn’t had a sip in over a month.

“So, about that Medusa retelling…” Sara, another author, trailed off, leaving the remark open-ended.

“No.”

“Okay, so how about that adult fantasy?”

“No,” I said again, shoving a fry into my mouth.

Sara rolled her eyes for a second but quickly went into puppy dog mode. “Why not? Why won’t you let me read what you have?”

Narrowing my eyes I shook my head at her. She’d been on me about it all weekend, which was more intense than her texts or Discord messages about it.

“Because they both need major and I mean major rewrites. Plus they aren’t my main focus right now. I don’t have time for them to be.”

“But Kennie, we won’t judge past you, we just want to see what you have.” My agent said, joining in on the harassment.

Soon the entire table was pouting at me. It was unfair, but I had to remain strong. Both stories were not things I would want to see. They were due for some major changes and made me cringe beyond belief. It was like some of my earlier music in that regards. Couldn’t really listen to it without shivering in disgust.

“No. You will wait.” I made sure to look them all in the eyes before turning to Ara. “And aren’t you supposed to be the one discouraging my wandering eye. I have a whole sequel to work on in like two weeks.”

Ara just took a sip of her tea and shrugged. Her unabashedness didn’t surprise me, she could be the worst when it came to me thinking about writing other things.

“Not like you aren’t ahead of schedule with it anyway.”

I was ready to respond sarcastically, but she wasn’t wrong.

We all quickly dissolved from trying to get me to show them my shame to talking about how con was so far. We all enjoyed it, but some were more drained than others. It was great to see people who liked books or liked out books, but after some much interaction with others, it would be hard to keep going.

It’s why we spent a lot of our non-con related meet-ups in a relaxed environment where no one was forced to say a word.

“So, any new music?” Ara instigated.

“None of ya business, ma’am.” I turned and glared at her, which made her glance away.

Rolling my eyes I continued eating in silence, listening to the conversations but making no effort to join in unless I was spoken directly to. I was so not present that I almost didn’t hear my phone ring and when I noticed it I was prepared to let it go to voicemail until I realized the voicemail.

Before anyone could say anything I snatched it up from the table where all the phones were. Everyone’s attention moved to me, but thankfully none appeared to have seen the caller ID or picture.

“That better not be work,” Sara warned.

“It’s not.”

Leaning away from her I cleared my throat and answered the phone in Korean. “Hello?”

“Hey,” Yoongi said.

“Hi.”

There was an awkward pause as usual when he called me, which always made me laugh. “What’s up Yoon?”

“Nothing,” he muttered.

My laughter increased and drew the attention of the table, which I brushed off as I collected myself.

“Nothing? You’re up at 1:00 a.m and nothing is up? If I recall you knocked out the last five nights before midnight.”

There was silence and then a scoff. “How would you know? You didn’t answer one of those nights.”

My mouth dropped open for a second in surprise, but I had no clue why. He’d been holding that over me for three days, whining about him having something important to ask me then. Yet he couldn’t recall what said important thing was.

“What was that? I couldn’t quite hear you.”

On the other end, I could hear him chuckle. He didn’t even bother to muffle it like he’d done the first few times we’d talked and he’d even slightly sassed me.

The jerk was trying to get a rise out of me.

“I will hang up on you.”

“Wait. Wait. Okay. I was working on untitled three and it inspired something else, so I wanted your thoughts,” he said.

My interest was beyond piqued. He never let me listen to things, no matter how much I begged. “Something else? Something else like what?”

“None of your business something else.”

“Well, how am I supposed to give my honest, professional opinion if I don’t know what I’m giving…”

He cut me off, “Not going to work. I can hang up instead.”

“Fine. Fine,” I said in English by accident. Again the group's eyes were on me, but I waved them off.

“Okay.”

For seconds after nothing was said and I could barely hear the clicking of what I assumed was his mouse. The more time passed the more excited I became until there was a soft melody playing.

“Shit,” he said before it stopped. “Wrong one.”

Again I was left to wait until a much more intense sound slipped through the phone. It was a much harder beat, something that felt very on brand with your typical rap song but was straddling line into metal music. I’d never assumed he’d be one for the sound.

Pushing past my shock I listened closely as he played it a second time unprompted. When it was over I played it over in my head, trying my best to pick it apart of something.

“So?” he asked.

“It’s good, pleasing to the ears. But were you trying to venture into metal music? And were you going for something so drum heavy? If yes, then maybe take away some of that cello. I think that’s a cello. Why the hell is there a cello piece in there?” The more I thought the more confused I got.

Instead of answering me he laughed. It sounded like one of his head throwing laughs too.

“Are you fucking with me?”

“Maybe,” he answered, still laughing.

“I’m hanging up!”

“No, wait. Here. This is the real thing.”

The track started the same, bass drum doing its thing and I almost hung up, but instead of the bass continuing with the cello like before it faded a little into the background. Everything that made it weird and metal was gone, replaced by a hip hop style beat that was more his style.

Once it played twice I spoke up. “I actually like this one and it’s still pleasing to the ears. Is there was a specific thing you were going for? I could be of more use if I knew.”

“No. Just wanted to see if it sounded okay.”

“Yoon, tell me. I hate the mystery,” I whined.

“No.”

Arguing with him would get me nowhere and I knew it. “Okay, then what was that other one?”

“Nope. Bye Kendall,” he said in a sing-song voice.

“No. Yoongi, tell me.”

“Bye.”

“Fine, bye.”

With a groan, I hung up and placed my phone back at the center of the table. The urge to pout and try to get him to tell me was strong, but I also couldn’t help the smile that formed.

Sara cleared her throat as I felt my cheeks begin to burn, drawing me from whatever weirdly happy place I was going. When I glanced her way her eyes were narrowed. “You said it wasn’t for work.”

As I cursed I blamed myself for not remembering that she one of the two Korean American’s at the table spoke it fluently, but that wasn’t the case. I’d simply assumed nothing I’d be embarrassed about would be said. Not like she didn’t know I knew him after I’d had her check a text for me without thinking it would be him days before.

I shrugged. “It wasn’t.”

“Sounded like it.”

“It was a friend asking for an opinion.” Grabbing my glass I hoped she’d drop it as I took a swig.

“Yup, totally. Min Yoongi just called for an opinion and that totally wasn’t adorable flirting.”

“No,” I practically shouted. Clearing my throat I tried again, “No, that’s not what happened at all. And you could only hear my side, so you wouldn’t know anyway.”

She wiggled her eyebrows and nudged my shoulder a little. “ You’re smiling way too hard for it not to have been.”

In response, my hand went to cover my mouth as I tried to push down the smile.

It’s cute. You’re both cute.”

Before I could respond someone asked her a question. As her attention diverted elsewhere I chewed the inside of my cheek and fought down the flustered feeling inside of me.

#min yoongi #yoongi #suga #original character #oc #sugaxoc #yoongixoc #producer!oc #writer!oc #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #yoongi fanfic #suga fanfic #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic

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hypereactive · 5 years ago

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1. Who was the last person you held hands with? my best friend

2. Are you outgoing or shy? shy

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? my best friend

4. Are you easy to get along with? depends. i try to be, but im also REALLY picky/have strong opinions on a lot of stuff, and im autistic..

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? yeah

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? a caring one, who listens before judging

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? yeah

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? my best friend

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? sometimes

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? probably my best friend

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “o”

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? uhm. I like A LOT of songs.

billie ellish- bury a friend and you should see me in a crown

rag’n’bone man - human

rebel - black pearl (hes a pirate)

Aladdin soundtrack - Prince Ali and one jump ahead

arctic monkeys - Do I wanna know?

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? rarely

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? yea

15. What good thing happened this summer? new job, in my field of study

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? yepp

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? probs at least simple life

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? only if I run into him getting coffee (he works there)

19. Do you like bubble baths? if im in the mood

20. Do you like your neighbors? one i do, one i absolutely dont, the rest i dont interact w

21. What are you bad habits? im REALLY picky, and can come off as ungrateful (if u can’t do it right id rather u just not do it. apparently its more common to think at least you got something/they tried.)

22. Where would you like to travel? Anywhere w the right people. Nowhere without.

23. Do you have trust issues? kinda. More like I understand people wont understand me or meet my needs adequately.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? morning coffee

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? my chin/teeth

26. What do you do when you wake up? if I have ResponsibilitesTM i get up and get coffee and leave the house in less than 20 min, otherwise i lay in bed on tumblr until i have to get up due to responsibilities or hunger.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? im good w where its at tbh

28. Who are you most comfortable around? my best friend

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? yeah.

30. Do you ever want to get married? yeah

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? lol yesss

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? none?

33. Spell your name with your chin. bdfuds

34. Do you play sports? What sports? not really. i like frisbee and longboarding if those count.

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? TV

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? no. I cant keep secrets.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? i usu dont. ill just go on my phone/leave/etc

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? my best friend.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? hot topic

40. What do you want to do after high school? lol im not in high school

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? depends on what they did and why, and if they want to grow as a person/make it right

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean? im tired/overwhelmed/content/bored

43. Do you smile at strangers? if i lock eyes with them and they smiled, i might smile back, but im pretty good at Not Looking At People

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? ocean

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? ResponsibilitiesTM

46. What are you paranoid about? having a heart attack and no one being around to help me/not noticing until its too late

47. Have you ever been high? yea

48. Have you ever been drunk? yea

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? black

51. Ever wished you were someone else? no, but i have wished my parents were

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my chin probs. idk i like myself

53. Favourite makeup brand? i dont wear makeup

54. Favourite store? this is a duplicate question.

55. Favourite blog? uhm.

56. Favourite colour? black/grey/light pink/raspberry/celery green

57. Favourite food? cheese, cheddar brats, spinach, chocolate chip cookies, milkshakes

58. Last thing you ate? rice w beef, spinach, egg and soy sauce

59. First thing you ate this morning? coffee and nutella

60. Ever won a competition? For what? I think so but i cant remember. Oh i think I won an anti-bullying poster competition once.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? lol nopee

62. Been arrested? For what? no

63. Ever been in love? few times now

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? uh. no. cuz i didnt even like the dude.

65. Are you hungry right now? no

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? i only have one real friend so I feel like thats unfair

67. Facebook or Twitter? tumblr.

68. Twitter or Tumblr? still tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? lol no

70. Names of your bestfriends? no, bc hed not appreciate it

71. Craving something? What? not rn

72. What colour are your towels? grey or floral w pinks and blacks and oranges

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? 3

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? yes, usu. 2

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? total? uh. 8?

75. Favourite animal? birbs prob.

76. What colour is your underwear? why?

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? chocolate, unless its ice cream. then vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? berry (any) or cheesecake (also any)

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? grey

80. What colour pants? a darker grey

81. Favourite tv show? uh. i like sherlock.

82. Favourite movie? deadpool probs. or pirates of the Caribbean. or Aladdin. or detective pikachu.

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? never seen either

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? never seen either

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? n/a

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? uhm. I cant remember. Probs the black and white one w the scar, or the starfish, or the sea gull

87. First person you talked to today? my sister

88. Last person you talked to today? my best friend

89. Name a person you hate? my past roommate

90. Name a person you love? my best friend

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? my past roommate and most recent ex

92. In a fight with someone? currently? no? ever? yes.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? 5

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? 6

95. Last movie you watched? i dont know

96. Favourite actress? i dunno

97. Favourite actor? i dunno

98. Do you tan a lot? no

99. Have any pets? no

100. How are you feeling? i dont know

101. Do you type fast? yeah

102. Do you regret anything from your past? yeah, but not overly

103. Can you spell well? i think so

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? no

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? i dont think so, but i want to (w the right people)

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? yeah, oops

107. Have you ever been on a horse? yep

108. What should you be doing? cleaning my house

109. Is something irritating you right now? no

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? yea

111. Do you have trust issues? yea

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? my best friend

113. What was your childhood nickname? B. as in, just the letter

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? yea

115. Do you play the Wii? no

116. Are you listening to music right now? yea

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? not usually

118. Do you like Chinese food? i think so

119. Favourite book? uhm. sherlock (the whole series). the uglies series (scott westerfield). the secret garden. Fahrenheit 451. 1984.

120. Are you afraid of the dark? no, but sometimes im afraid theres something in it

121. Are you mean? no

122. Is cheating ever okay? no

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? if i want to

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

125. Do you believe in true love? im not sure i know what this means

126. Are you currently bored? no

127. What makes you happy? i dont know

128. Would you change your name? no

129. What your zodiac sign? gemini

130. Do you like subway? i cant eat there

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? lol weve been dating for a while now

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? my best friend

133. Favourite lyrics right now? uh. I dont know.

134. Can you count to one million? that would take a month, so no.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? i dont know. probably that i couldnt go to work bc i was “throwing up from a migraine” when i hadnt thrown up (yet).

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? it varies

137. How tall are you? i think im like. 5′8″?

138. Curly or Straight hair? curly. but not consistent

139. Brunette or Blonde? i am a brunette

140. Summer or Winter? winter. i can always wear more clothes

141. Night or Day? night. its quiet and calm

142. Favourite month? august and october

143. Are you a vegetarian? no

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? yes.

145. Tea or Coffee? yes. depends on time of day/year/mood/etc

146. Was today a good day? i dont know

147. Mars or Snickers? mars

148. What’s your favourite quote? “if you cant explain it simply, you dont understand it well enough” -einstien is one of them. but there are more

149. Do you believe in ghosts? i dont know

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “aunt lillian’s footsteps became more distant, became whispers, were gone.”

@ramblebrambleamble i got bored and answered all of them

#about me

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dherzogblog · 7 years ago

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songs/17

Hey everyone. Welcome back. In a break with tradition I expanded this year’s playlist well beyond the 80 minute limit of a CD. in addition, and let’s be honest here, I did have some extra time on my hands to listen to music in 2017. So for your listening (and reading ) pleasure I present 1 hour and 50 minutes of the good stuff from the past year. I know, I know, it’s a lot. So is this blog for anyone who actually tries to read it. I’ll promise to try and get it back under control next year, but in the meantime…. enjoy! PS- Click on the bold type below for the music, extras and surprises.

Ride with Me- The Mavericks My theme song for 2017. This year was all about travel and figuring out what I was going to when I grow up. I checked ALL the boxes on the travel end, while the latter remains a work in progress. As the year began and I found myself “unencumbered”, I literally told Noreen to keep her bags packed. A few weeks later the always dependable Mavericks echoed my thoughts with this tune singing: “I gotta go… a whole world to see. So pack your bags up baby, Come along and ride with me “. And ride we did. From Havana to The Grand Canyon, Tokyo to Tel Aviv, Motown to Muscle Shoals and many places in between, It was trains, planes, and automobile’s across thousands of miles with Noreen and as well as some good friends. It was nothing but good times, and I was so grateful for the opportunity.

No Particular Place To Go- Chuck Berry In 1973 a concert film entitled “Let The Good Times Roll” was released. It was a document of the then popular Richard Nader Rock & Roll revival shows that filled Madison Square Garden regularly. The film featured performances by Bo Diddley, Little Richard, Fats Domino, The Shirelles, and Chuck Berry. It was an era of great popularity for the vintage rock sounds of the 50′s. American Graffiti, Happy Days, Sha Na Na, and even The Beach Boys had helped usher in a “oldies” music revival. It was “retro” and” throwback” before anyone coined those terms. And it proved that music that was once considered disposable as well as the exclusive domain of pimply teenagers had true enduring appeal. At the time Chuck Berry was riding the wave of his somewhat regrettable “My Ding A Long” novelty single. That song, as well as the 50’s/60’s revival in general is probably what got my 12 year old self into the theater. It was incredible to watch Little Richard climb all over the stage in a frenzy, his androgynous image predating Bowie, and his frenzied stage antics providing a blue print for Prince. Then there was Bo Diddley all in black, strutting the stage with his signature guitar chugging like a freight train, and Chuck Berry duck walking the crowd into a frenzy, it all had me mesmerized. Upon seeing the film, I was so blown away I went back to see it a second time just days later. It was the only way to see it again back then. The acts were all well past their prime and were considered mere “oldies” acts at the time. Berry was not yet 50. (He wouldn’t have been old enough to play Desert Trip) For me, it was a crash course in rock history helping me understand and process almost everything I heard after.

Champagne Corolla- Justin Townes Earle More Songs About Cars And Girls. JTE covers a lot of ground on this outing. He’s 8 albums into his career, and stepping out of the long shadow of his father.

How to Boil An Egg- Courtney Barnett One off single from Australian singer songwriter making her return to the list. More messy, jangly musings on Millenial angst. She returned later in the year with a full length album with in partnership with Kurt Vile.

On The Rock- Bash & Pop Speaking of jangly and messy, Replacement Tommy Stinson delivers one of my favorite songs of the year. Good fun.

Bad Art and Weirdo Ideas (Quiet Slang)- Beach Slang The original version of this song appeared on the songs/15 list. James Alex the band’s leader starting touring under the moniker Quiet Slang last year. This EP contains some remakes as well as covers recorded in a “Quiet Slang” setting that includes strings. I loved this song the first time around, and even more so now.

Slow Me Down- Jess Ware This year’s model. Yet another of the UK’s seemingly endless supply of soulful female vocalists. I love a good torch ballad.

Brand New Me- Aretha Franklin and The Royal Philharmonic Orchestra I’m normally suspect of these types of projects. Too gimmicky. Messing with these seminal records borders on sacrilege, But it being Lady Soul, along with some of my very favorite songs I gave a listen. Pairing classic Aretha vocals with brand new backing from London’s Royal Philharmonic Orchestra these reboots seem to reach for something else. Imagine them as part of an Aretha Franklin Broadway jukebox musical or the lush soundtrack to an Aretha biopic. And while this particular cut doesn’t have the low key swing of the original, it does have it’s own big, brassy charm. Cinematic orchestration aside, these Aretha vocals remain stone cold classics in any settings.

At The Breaking Point- Zeshan B Remarkable debut from an Indian Muslim soul singer out of Chicago. The album, recorded in Memphis, is a mixture of obscure R&B , and retro feel originals expertly capturing a mid sixties soul vibe. Sung in three different languages , including Punjabi, the disc also features a great rendition of George Perkins Civil rights song “Cryin In The Streets”

Feeling Alive- Earl St. Clair This young man from Alabama delivers a positive and upbeat message in a modern R&B setting. Plus, I am totally down with the sentiment: “My friends say I should live a little, gotta say yes more”. From his gospel influenced singing to the fiddle heard near the end, their are echos of the deep south felt throughout.

Sweet Love- Wizkid Slinky exotic riddims from this Nigerian hip hop artist

Skin and Bone- Phil Cook I don’t know much about this guy. From north Carolina by way of Wisconsin. His previous record (this was a one off single) was mostly performed in an acoustic country blues/gospel vein. This track reminds me of a late era Sly Stone groove meeting conscious hip hop. The message is right on time, so “clap your hands”.

Birds Of A Feather, We Rock Together- Vulfpeck Vulpeck are back with all their funky, eclectic, quirky charm intact. You not be be able to get the title refrain out of your head after hearing it once.

Brutal- the Expanders “Man say it brutal out deh”. Perfect description for the world at large in 2017. This Southern California unit specializes in rekindling the spirit of 70’s roots reggae, specifically the unique sounds of the eras classic vocal trios. This is a faithful remake of the Itals track from 1981. Original Ital Ronnie Davis died earlier this year.

Ladies Nite- Bootsy Collins It’s ladies night in America folks. Bootsy always knows what time it is. O.G.Funk style.

My Old School- Steely Dan (Walter Becker) When I got to college in the fall of 1977, Steely Dan’s Aja was just about to hit record shops. It was an immediate smash upon being released. Prior to that release I knew their pop hits, but not the LP’s to a large degree. I really loved Aja. I was a big jazz funk fan and it had a lot of that influence. Later that school year, during the blizzard of 78, I have vivid memories of that record blasting from nearly every dorm room stereo and radio as we were cooped up for days on end. My next door neighbor in the dorm (from Worcester/“"Woostah" Mass) was a true Steely Dan fanatic. He considered Aja a bit of a sell out on their part. He insisted I listen to the 5 albums in their catalogue that proceeded it. So I did, borrowing from his collection one LP at a time. I liked them all, especially the magnificent Katy Lied. But the song that always stayed with me was My Old School. A funky (and and not a bit bitter) anthem with a blast of horns straight from E Street topped off with an unforgettable sing a long chorus. As of this printing the Becker estate is now suing Fagen. California might fall into the sea just yet, and but no one is gong back to their old school.

Heart Of The City- Los Straitjackets In 17 years I’m not sure I’ve ever included a rock instrumental. Los Straitjackets remain the premier purveyors of that long forgotten genre. On their latest the band tackle’s the great Nick Lowe’s canon. Super rockin fun all the way through.

Jackpot- Nikki Lane Stylish Nashville rebel with a great voice, rolls the dice and comes with a twangy and rocking winner

A Little Pain- Margo Price A slice of country soul heaven from alt country’s it girl.

Living In The City- Hurray For The Riff Raff On her latest outing band leader Alynda Lee Segarra embraces her Bronx bred Hispanic roots moving ever so slightly away from the alt country sound of previous albums. This track splits the difference nicely.

Here Comes My Girl- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers I vividly remember both the first time I saw Tom Petty perform, as well as the last time. The first was in Madison Square Garden as part of a tremendous line up at one of The No Nukes Shows headlined by Bruce Springsteen. The under card was pretty strong that night. Bonnie Raitt, Peter Tosh, and Gil Scott- Heron. I was a fan of all the acts and had seen them all play live, save Petty. I was not sure what to expect from Petty that night. At that time he had three songs garnering airplay and scratching the Top 40. There was the Byrds like “American Girl”, the AOR ready “Breakdown”, and the taught, urgent energy of “I Need to Know”. That track had me wondering if The Heartbreakers might just be another skinny tie band. In addition there was the slight confusion because punk rocker Johnny Thunders band was also named The Heartbreakers . So I wasn’t exactly sure what I was about to see. His short dispelled any notions of a the act being new wave flash in the pan. It was clear Petty was more straight ahead rock classicist. The release of Damn The Torpedoes just a few weeks later would confirm that. Petty had arrived and was thrust onto the charts and into the big leagues. I was never a huge fan. I loved the best albums and ignored the others. I never found him a great live performer, but always left his shows happy. The songs were great and the band was top notch. Somehow despite his nuanced low key approach he became an unlikely MTV video star. He made continually great clips and they dominated the channel. Despite that, he never did promotions and contests, was rarely interviewed, and his managers did not work us nearly as much as his superstar peers. He toured regularly and always seemed to have a clip in rotation. He was the every man rock star, not bigger than life, not overly political, just writing great songs, hanging with The Wilbury’s and doing his thing. It felt like he was was always there, but he never was. A huge star, yet somehow in the shadows. Hence I rarely ever came face to face. My one memory is standing on stage at Live Aid next to him, and then Heartbreaker drummer Stan Lynch as they waited like anxious school boys to see the reunited Led Zeppelin. They could not have been more excited, anxiously awaiting the set to begin. The band hit the stage and started too play. It was a disaster, just awful. Half way through the second song Petty threw Lynch a sour look. In a flash they were gone, back to the artist compound. They could not bear to watch. I saw Petty perform for the last time just ten days before he passed. I was in the first row at The Hollywood Bowl. Early on I remarked to my wife “He doesn’t look good” (although truthfully, did he ever?). His energy seemed good, and his demeanor upbeat, but he was pasty and wan. He stumbled crossing the stage a few times, took some quiet puff of a cigarette hidden on the drum riser. And he was doing a weird thing with his mouth/lips/teeth. But honestly my reaction was not unlike running into a friend you haven’t seen in a bit where they did not look their best. Like everyone else, I was shocked when I heard the news. When all is said and done for me, it was the songs. Lyrics clear and concise, monster melodic hooks, classic influences and great production. Petty had a chip on his shoulder for sure, but it fueled the hope, ambition, and longing in his best songs and allowed him to achieve pop perfection over and over.

Gentle On My Mind- Glen Campbell 1968. I listened to what ever WABC played on the radio. Around that time there were three sappy and saccharine pop hits that always managed to make my cynicism free, nine year old heart ache with melancholy. The country soul of “O.C Smith’s. “Little Green Apples”, the maudlin mush of Bobby Goldsboro’s “Honey”, and the gorgeous,”Gentle on My Mind”. 1968 turned dark quickly with the assassination of Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy, the simmering controversy around the Vietnam War, and a divisive presidential election. The bright sunlight of The Summer Of Love disappeared as quickly, as did this type of 60′s pop (and psychedelia for that matter). Campbell continued to write mainstream and country hits, star in his own prime tine TV series (”Hello, I’m Glen Campbell!”), and later become tabloid fodder with his drama and drug fueled marriage to country bad girl Tanya Tucker. All of this conspiring to obscure the fact that he was a truly a tremendous songwriter and performer. I was moved recently watching the heartbreaking documentary “I’ll Be Me” which chronicles his battle with Alzhiemers on his final tour. Its well worth a watch and adds to the story of this somewhat overlooked legend.

Tupelo- Jason Isbell and The 400 Unit Beautiful ballad from the ex Drive By Trucker. A great album overall as well.

Transformation- Van Morrison If this sounds familiar, that’s probably the point. This track echoes back to Van’s great mid 70′s albums. It’’s smothered in enough tupelo honey, crazy love and celtic soul to turn on your electric light and send you into the mystic. I’m gonna guess you’re all ok with that.

Midnight Rider- Allman Brothers Band (Greg Allman) CLICK HERE for my earlier Greg Allman post (REVISED AND UPDATED)

Find Yourself- Lukas Nelson and The Promise of The Real Willie’s son and band fresh off the road deliver a promising set. This southern soul track recalls classic’s like William Bell’s “I Forgot to Be Your Lover”, and Delaney and Bonnie’s version of “Everybody Loves A Winner. That plus the pedigree gets my interest. Willie clearly raised him right.

What Would I Do- Lizz Wright The elegant and soulful Lizz Wright delivers plenty of grace on her latest set of well chosen covers like this Ray Charles gem.

Have You Heard Anything From The Lord Today- Cody Chestnutt Elusive and genre hopping Cody Chestnutt returns with only his fifth album in over 15 years. Better known within the industry than out, he always delivers something interesting. This time it’s a little bit of a little bit of faith.

Not Dark Yet- Shelby Lynne& Alison Moorer Two of country’s finest voices, and sisters, finally team up for an entire album. This is one of my very favorite latter day Dylan tunes, and they sing it beautifully. I was haunted by their version the very first time I heard it and have played it quite a bit since. I’ve always interpreted the lyrics to be the final reflections of someone getting ready to meet their maker. As 2017 brought some very tough days, there were times I couldn’t help thinking of it as a reflection of the state of our union and the planet. “It’s not dark yet, but it’s getting there” I thought to myself once too often. Here’s to a better 2018. Here’s the whole thing on Spotify: songs/17 The Herzogs wish you and all of yours the very best. Look forward to seeing you in the new year. xo dh Los Angeles, December 2017

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storytellerxxxx · 7 years ago

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ONE OK ROCK NYC 2 DAYS EXPERIENCE

Here’s me avoiding all responsibilities and totally ignoring that it’s almost been 2 months :D

As (many?) of you may know I went to both NYC shows, general admission for the first day and VIP for the second day!! I was going to do a write up in the following days after but I was still pretty overwhelmed then and have pushed it back till now, whoops. Warning, long post ahead as I gotta fit 2 days in somehow HAHA

So keep reading if you wanna know how I kissed Toru’s cheek, ran into them and got selfie + sign with Toru :D

All photos are mine/taken by me.

Since it was middle of summer this time, I could actually wait out in line and not die of freezing like back in January so I arrived at the venue around 9:20. Surprise, there was already a short line (that totally didn’t change much for the next few hours tbh lol) VIP and general admission lines were separated much later in the day like a few hours before opening time so everyone was just chilling till then.

This was a banner someone had made and everyone in the line in the morning had signed! It was gigantic and pretty fucking cool, they gave it to them during M&G.

Around 10-11 their bright orange bus arrived in the front of the venue but none of the members came with it. Around noon Ryota was the first to make his appearance and walked in alone. I went to get lunch and during the time I was gone, Ryota and Michelle walked past the line :)) At some point after that a camera crew came out to record the line, they had us all stand up and they filmed everyone cheering lol Ryota walked in again later with Toru at around 3 and Taka did as well soon after I think (I missed the record button on my phone for Taka, good job me). By then the line for VIP and general admission had been split. I was at the very front of the GA line. I’ll complain talk about the line splitting and staff when I get to day 2. But anyway, camera man followed them inside. Michelle and Jamil walked in a bit after them with giant bags of food I think, Michelle is so beautiful :’)

So yeah, then we got in and I got a spot in what I guess was like the third row between Taka and Toru. Palisades was the first opener, I didn’t listen to any of their stuff beforehand bc I wanted to experience them live first and let me just say, I totally fell in love with them. They played songs off their self titled album that was released earlier this year along with an Unsteady by X Ambassadors cover (which was amazing and I really want a studio version). Fun fact, Brandon (the second vocalist and bass player) held onto my friend’s hand for a moment during that :’) The lighting for their set was really dark so barely any nice pics :((

Here’s Lou, the lead vocalist! Super nice and chill guy btw

After Palisades was Set It Off...not much to say about them from me tbh I don’t really like them but their song Hypnotized is fun and catchy. Cody (I think that’s the singer’s name?) went into the crowd and disappeared at the end, I got to touch his hand from all the shoving.

AND THEN, what everyone had been waiting for, ONE OK ROCK! I won’t say much about the songs as I really don’t have as much to say as the January show bc this isn’t the first time hearing them live. I remember pointing out that Taka did seem to struggle a bit with I was King but he was on point for that this time. I had hoped that they’d have Listen and owt on the setlist but sadly they didn’t.

Toru was on fire. His arms are so nice.

So beautiful.

After Chester’s passing, I had already imagined oor doing some sort of tribute for him and they met my expectations that day with the One More Light cover. It was a moment that can’t be described easily, the first performance they did of it. There was sense that everyone was either holding their breath or singing along softly, paying full attention to Taka’s raw voice.

One More Light replaced Hard to Love and led into Take What You Want, which had (around) a minute of silence. Toru looked quite emotional at the beginning, I remember the people around me asking if he was crying (which he wasn’t). I wish I could say it was totally quiet but it wasn’t someone yelled the next few lines of the song like 3 times even though everyone was shushing him ://

The Osaka bros rocked it out together for a moment during a song that I totally forgot, oops. (hello pics from my phone and someone else’s hand right in front of me LOL) Again, was not on Ryota’s side of the stage and didn’t see him much being how short I am :’)) same with Tomo, but he was rocking it back there.

For the encore, Taka actually came down to Toru’s side to crowd surf, and I ended up touching his arm/shoulder LOL so. much. pushing. Everyone wanted a piece of Taka haha

No picture at the end this time but when they were waving goodbye and stuff, Tomo was the last one to leave the stage and he knocked into Toru’s mic stand, knocking off all the remaining picks...Security gave them out but I was too far away cries

After the show, we met Palisades by their merch! Was still so hyped from the concert and probably a mess but everyone was so nice. Told them we would be seeing them again tomorrow and they were excited. Lou called me sweetie HAHA Brandon is adorable

What is this?, you may ask. Well, it’s Toru’s feet LOL

So long story short, our group was still outside then and everyone else had left already. We were about to walk past the doors of the venue when Ryota and Michelle just came out. I was so shocked, I did some small wave and like quietly squeaked out Ryota I think. His hair was in a ponytail! Not was it only him, Toru, Tomoya and Jeff came out right after them. They told us they were going to get food and we didn’t stop them for pics or signs, just waved and said hi. And that’s how we ran into oor minus Taka, amazing.

DAY 2

Got there at around 10-11 bc I was dead from the day before. Same deal with waiting in line and stuff but none of oor walked by that day. Lou (of Palisades) did walk by the line at like noon or something and then walked back past us again bc he went the wrong way, that was hilarious.

Soo I had VIP second day and when they split the lines, the person let the VIP from the front of the line move to the VIP section (which was like around the corner) BUT they cut us off and then had the VIP from the back of the line go. It was so bullshit, thankfully most of my group had made it into the first cut. The asshole guy also yelled at everyone basically that they need to stop complaining bc “everyone will get the equal time and treatment.” He told this to those, like us, who had been waiting hella early that were now next to people who had just joined the line. They also had two security scanners but the guy only used one on the other side of our group + the other really early group.

(pic from day one, on day two we were on the outer side but the guy only used the right side. smh)

VIP was the same as always, show ID, get laminate. The laminates were a lot nicer this time :)

Went in and lined up for M&G, we were like the second group in the line lol Jeff explained how it would work, did a demo in which he had us pretend he was about a foot shorter to be Taka and had us cheer as he walked in, I think I was more laughing than cheering at that LOL but apparently we were ahead of schedule so they started really soon after that, like oor just randomly walked in right after.

Meet and greet experience, many thanks to my friend for recording my turn for me :’)

Hugged Ryota and said hi, moved onto Taka, hugged him and then we just kinda held each other’s arms and then he held my hand bc I spontaneously decided to thank them for the Chester tribute and that it was beautiful and that I would have seen them the next week in NJ. Yeah.

I did not notice at the time but Toru was intensely staring me down the whole time, amazing.

Then I hugged Toru and Tomo, I did not bump my head against Tomo’s shoulder like last time :)) Tomo is so happy and smiley, he’s so precious.

I went back to the middle for the pic and I said “Toru?” and he looked down (hello I am smol) and I asked if I could give him a kiss on his cheek (This was Anna (@shajichan)’s idea okay) and there was like an awkward second of just us staring at each other before he was like “sure.” He bent his knees so that I could reach him :’)) I was still on the tips of my toes :’))

Ryota was off in his own world the whole time so idk what he was thinking when he saw us tbh LOL and Taka’s hand had actually been around my waist from the moment I went back to the middle :’))) Being that close to Toru was an experience.

ANYWAY, I bought merch while we were waiting after the M&G. The merch for Ambitions is so...lol but I had to get something at least

The signed album from VIP as well. Not included in pic is the wristband bc I forgot I was still wearing it, smart me.

Since we were basically at the front of the VIP, I got a spot on barricade right in front of Toru. Let me just say this spot was magical or something bc I was not pushed once, had room to step back if I wanted to and I was cold. Magical I say.

Show was like the same except 250x better bc I was front row this time. There’s vids of like Toru being rude throughout the whole show on my ig if you want to see what went down.

Maybe it was being so close and being able to see them so much clearer but I was way more emotional during One More Light than on the first day. I’m pretty sure Julen has pics of me trying to cover my face with my phone during it :)) The silence in TWYW was completely silent this time, it was so perfect. Taka was also doing some mic tricks during MLF, like throwing it up and catching it, twirling it..etc really nice to see that again after so long since his wired mic tricks :((

Taka came out with a beer for the encore, surprising everyone I think LOL no crowd surfing this time sadly.

We went to Palisades merch table again afterwards, actually buying stuff this time. I got their album and shirt and gave their merch guy a $10 tip LOL

Album was signed later outside by Lou and Brandon!! We were waiting for them bc they had to clear the venue so we couldn’t take pics or have time to talk to them inside. While waiting outside, we met Palisades photographer/Brandon’s friend, Geremy, who was only doing photography for Palisades but oor was so amazing that he borrowed an AAA pass to shoot them the whole time :D

So sweet.

Ryota and Michelle actually came out and walked right behind me when I was talking to Geremy and my friends... but I caught Toru when he came out! Totally missed Taka even though he was like right next to me as well at some point

My signed phone case :’)

And that’s about it for the two days. Writing these reports are fun lol I am broke but those 2 days were fucking awesome and I hanged out with the best people, really want to do it again soon :D

#one ok rock #oor #it's been over a month #whoops #toru #taka #tomoya #ryota #this was so fun #i miss everyone #take me back #or take my to germany so I can meet Anna #either way #toru killed me multiple times #is anyone gonna read all of this #pls tell me if you do #LOL

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lebilliam · 7 years ago

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Hey sirmcartney asked me to do this

I’d rather be doing this over my school ish anyways :’)

Ask me some questions!

3 Fears: Ghosts :((( , fat insects , failing stuff

3 things I love: i fukin love talking to my friends and hanging out , listening to music that i havent heard in forever, and that post workout glow

2 turns on: i can send them memes :) , i can laugh and not give a heck with them

2 turns off: i cant send them memes :( , being mean to me (im sensitive af)

My best friend: zoo wee this is a hard one but id prob say logan or brian or adam or morgan or alex. take ur pick. (morgan and logan tbh)

Sexual orientation: str8

How tall am I: 5′9″ according to my ID

What do I miss right now: intimacy

Favourite color: orange!!!!!

Do I have a crush: ;)

Favourite place: currently ive been digging the imagination room

What am I listening to right now: affection // Cigarettes After Sex

Shoe size: it varies on the brand but normally 9.5 or 10? idk im bad

Eye color: brown

Hair color: black

Meaning behind my URL: its bc i wanted a recognizable alias that i could use across platforms

Favourite song: i always say liztomania by phoenix

Favourite band: Maroon 5 fanboy here but ive been a fan of Cigarettes after Sex for a while now

How I feel right now: STRESSED and ANGERY

Someone I love: myself (kinda)

My current relationship status:

My relationship with my parents: we dont really talk that much but good i think?

Favourite season: oof i like the heat but im gonna say winter bc i get to be emo and i can go walk on fresh snow

Tattoos and piercing i have: none atm

Tattoos and piercing i want: hmmm idk if i want anything big but i always thought the track shoe/wing thing would be nice

The reasons I joined Tumblr: all my friends had it so i thought i would be cool if i made one

Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?: i have gotten some before and i appreciate them

Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?: the last person i texted? surprisingly no

How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?: depends if i shower but i can get going in ~4-5 minutes

Have you shaved your legs in the past three days?: nope!

Where am I right now?: imagination room!

Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? hell yea who doesnt

Do I live with my Mom and Dad? not atm im chillin #dormlife

Am I excited for anything?: excited for the weekend

Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? hell to the yea of course

How often do I wear a fake smile?: everytime i feel weird around people idk usually i wouldnt say i smile that much unless im gooning

If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?: I believe that the world will introduce me to people when i need it (lame answer: idk anyone but maybe like my friends’ friends)

What do I think about most? this week it’s been the french essay i had to write but overall i think about being appreciated

Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? id be on both sides if i could but if i had to pick one id totally be in front

What was the last lie I told? oh haha i dont know (but i do know)

Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online? PHONE CALLS

Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Hell yea what else am i supposed to be afraid of. aliens are super cool man of course i think theyre real

Do I believe in magic? NOPE! but theres been some crazy magic tricks where i almost believe but then i see the “how it’s done” video for it

Do I believe in luck? hell yea of course! why would it not exist?

What’s the weather like right now? ughgh it’s disappointingly hot

What was the last book I’ve read? Huis Clos by Jean Paul Sartre (i had to read it for class but it really is a great work of art)

Do I have any nicknames? B, Lil B(ones i have heard the most) Billiam, Broletariate Biu (my mom calls me that), (billy bear is an old one and i dont know why they ever used it in the first place), goomph, toad, frog, ugly ass, nerd, dork, dingus

Do I spend money or save it? i spend it haha kms i really need to save more efficiently

Can I touch my nose with a tounge?: nope just tried and looked like a fool

Favourite animal? oof i want to say dogs but thats basic but dogs are so loving like i dont get it how do they do it

What was I doing last night at 12 AM?: i was up and i was emo. jk i was hanging out and watching bad Freshman xxl cyphers

What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Get Low by lil Jon or Faded (the remix) or change your mind by the killers. im gonna go ahead and say that change your mind gets my shit hyped UP

What is my favorite word? satiation

My top 5 blogs on tumblr: idk if im going to be honest i dont really use tumblr that much for personal blogs but i do love foodporn, til, ruined childhood

If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? love each other.

Do I have any relatives in jail? i dont think so? oh jk theyre not really a relative but they’re a close family friend’s relative

What is my current desktop picture? FUKIN FUNCTIONAL GROUPS THAT I DONT EVER KNOW OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD EVEN THOUGH THERES A TEST IN 10.25 HOURS

Had sex? ye

Bought condoms? ye

Gotten pregnant? cant really say that i have :p

Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? yes

Had job? yep! summer job at the zoo which was cool af

Smoked weed? once or twice

Smoked cigarettes? never.nope.disgusting

Drank alcohol? yes

Am I a vegetarian/vegan? i tried being vegetarian for a bit but then i wasnt eating enough red meat

Been overweight? as a kid i feel like i was overly big but now that i think about it i dont think i was fat

Been underweight? definitely

Gotten my heart broken? homeboy who hasnt?

Been to prom? yeep

Been in airplane? yeep

Learned another language? heck yes! english kek and im in the process of learning french. i tried learning lithuanian after a life changing experience.

Wore make up? surprisingly no

Dyed my hair? nope! i dont want to bleach my hair

Had a surgery? uhhh does laser surgery count? bc ive had 3 so far and i might have more

Met someone famous? every time i walk by a mirror ;) jk i met the senator of WA and the mayor of Tacoma a couple times

Stalked someone on a social network? pfft hell yes

Been fishing? yep! it’s always an experience

Been rejected by a crush? rip me yes

What do I want for birthday? i want to have a nice get together with friends where we do stuff that i dont have to pay for (but i dont think thats how life works anymore)

Do I like my handwriting? I love it in pen and when i hit my ecrivain stride, but otherwise when my hands get sweaty its just a fkin mess

Where do I want to live when older? i’ve always said paris, but zaragoza spain wouldnt be too bad!

Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad? yea boi

What I’m really bad at: believing in myself

What my greatest achievments are: i was a smart kid in elementary! i got some awards for getting good grades and i went to a competitive thing for piano once and i placed a couple times in some random races ive run

The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me: oof i dont want to really relive that experience

What I’d do if I won in a lottery: id ask /r/personalfinance

What do I like about myself: id like to think im gaining/losing healthy weight

My closest Tumblr friend: on tumblr?? idk i said i dont really use tumblr for friends but i’d probably say memequeen or sirmccartney

Any question you’d like? when am i going to meet up with my RA? no one knows idk i forgot about our meeting and hes really cool about rescheduling so i might do it this saturday

Are you outgoing or shy? it really depends on how im feeling but id like to think im pretty outgoing!

What kind of people are you attracted to? NICE FRIENDly people who can laugh. laughing is important to me

Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? personally i think yes

Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? nope!

Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? @thoseloverseyes most def

What does the most recent text that you sent say? “haha and then what ;)” jk it says” thank”

What are your 5 favorite songs right now? boy oh boy am i not ready for this question. Id think “this love, maroon 5″, humble (its a bop), “the air that i breathe, “open - rhye”, and rollin by calvin harris or this house by japaense breakfast idk the last one always changes

Do you like it when people play with your hair? i had a weird experience once but idk i think im willing to let other people touch my hair? not a fan

Do you think there is life on other planets?of course. this topic is not up for debate. just bc our defition of life has not been found that does not mean that there is not life in other places where we are either 1) not looking or 2) life that we cant recognize due to our weird weird obsession with water like life does not have to use water as a conduit for essential functions

well that was fun and id say it took some time. it def got me feeling better about life. 7.8/10 i would do it again but im sweaty af from this hot ass room

peace!

#personal

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hoofbeast · 7 years ago

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warning! dream daddy spoilers for damien’s route

first of all, i just want to say that i fucking love this game holy shit. i work full time so i only get enough time to play one route per day, so ill eventually get through all the dads, but i started off with damien. this post is going to be a whole shitload of screencaps and spoilers, so ill put everything under a cut

the theme song is so great XD i actually paused my pandora at work so i could listen to the song a couple times

i wanted to play my first run through of this game as close to me as i could manage. i took extra care to design my character to look like me. i had my husband help and he still cant get over how much this character looks like me. my first choice for hair color was white (like most of my hair is now) but we decided to go with red because no matter what i do to my hair i inevitably circle back to red. i gave him my signature sly smirk and i used my actual name, too :3

right away, this game has me pegged. this is exactly something i would do XD

she’s a real chip off the ol’ block. FUCK THE SYSTEM! *wipes tear*

we ran into brian and daisy in the park, and honestly, brian will probably be one of the last dads i pursue the ending for. few things piss me off more than one-upmanship. im sure theres a lot more to his character and route, but still.

also, question: is it possible that daisy is on the autism spectrum? theres a lot more to see of her, but what ive seen so far is that she’s exceedingly intelligent, doesnt get along well with kids her age but seems fine around older persons, didnt understand the concept of playing pretend until amanda explained it. i remember being pretty much exactly like that when i was a kid, and ive been thinking of getting evaluated for a while, myself.

the pokemon battle dad brag-off was a nice touch XD is it possible to win? cuz brian kicked my ass like it was his job

seriously, wow. is this game somehow able to evaluate the choices ive made so far and build a personality profile for me or is social awkwardness a way more universal experience than i thought?? because this is exactly #me

so anyway, i met a few more dads before calling it a day.

i kinda dig mat, he’s as awkward and rambly as i am, and i am always cool with people who are passionate about music and puns and music puns. so far, he was the top contender for my first dad.

then there’s robert, with his hot, smoldering gaze. hot and smoldering because i can already tell that inside, he’s a blazing tire fire.

i dont hate craig (forgot to get a cap of him, oops) but i do hate everything he stands for. namely, jogging, exercise, waking up before noon, and jogging. fuck an entire pile of that. i totally blew him off when he tried to get me to come to the gym and went back to sleep. like i said, im playing this as though Daddy Felix were the irl me and, honestly, craig would be lucky if he got a text of anything but misspelled swears and knife emojis from me if he woke me up at 6am

i will state right now that i do. not. trust joseph. he’s the only dad ive seen so far that actively flirts right from the beginning which is highly suspect behavior for a youth minister, and once i did the yard party and saw that he was still married, i trusted him even less. what kind of future could my character ever have with some cheatin ass bastard?? if i give you a bad dragon gift card will you back the fuck up off me, joseph >:/

#me

forgot to get a cap of damien in dead, goth, and beyond (i am totally calling it that from now on thats perf omg)

anyway, i got through the yard party part. i kinda feel bad for craig cuz i stonewalled him pretty hard haha. but mat was there and i wanted to know what he was saying.

about this dadbook thing, tho: its grindr. like, its thinly-veiled grindr. there is exactly 0 reason why a nonsexual social media site should have turn-ons and ideal dates. this is definitely where dads go to hook up and fuck.

i read through the profiles and decided to message damien, literally because his says to send him a letter if i wanna talk about black cats and i VERY MUCH WANT TO TALK ABOUT CATS, YES. i didnt expect it to trigger a date, but this is the opposite of a problem. i figured id just have to court mat on my next playthrough

damiens house is fucking awesome 10/10 would have tea again

hoh! looks like i found your slashfic, damien >:3

wait. the narration said it was a worn leather bound book. did this fucking nerd seriously have his gay naruto fanfic bound in leather and then he keeps it in his swanky library?? i knew there was a reason i liked him XD

i think the first time i saw this reaction was from brian at the park and i was looking at the text so i didn’t see what it actually was. this time i was paying attention and its fucking eggplant and droplet emojis and im fuCKING WHEEZING FUCK XDDDD i know damn well what that means ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

anyway ya boi felix fucking crushed it whoop whoop! i learned to date from the master (the dating master is of course papyrus)

i have actually never played a dating sim before so it never occurred to me that i could go on dates with multiple dads without fucking up my game. i thought i was locked in to damien’s route, which, again, was the opposite of a problem, full speed ahead ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

so damien wrote me a for real letter! what a classy gent. <3 i am always a slut for handwritten letters

so obviously i write him a letter back, and i try to pick the options that are classy and rule out the ones that are trashy or over the top. i remember being a goth teen (and a goth adult ahaha) and how much i hated being condescended to. i want to play along with damien’s shtick, not make fun of him

completely forgot to take any caps of the actual date, but damien is afraid of horror movies and that’s even more adorable than mcree being afraid of horses. also, the running gag of cliche horror movie shit happening when damien shows up (his door creaking open and then slamming closed, spontaneous cracks of thunder) is terrific. my favorite part of vampire chronicles II: evil never dies is during the twist ending where one of the characters fucking looks into the camera and says the full title of the next movie in the series (vampire chronicles III: evil must die again) like its an actual statement a person would say in conversation. that shit had me cracking up

third date i was cockblocked before i could kiss damien by his phone ringing, then we ended up here and omg if this is a blood donation clinic im gonna shit

i see pet carriers. this is a vet’s clinic or smth

*sharp gasp* he’s... a NERD!! not that i didnt know that already by the way he has smutty fanfic in his library lmao

who would i even be trying to kid, of course i am

me: *softly, choking back genuine tears* gaaaaaaaay....

fucking SWOOOOON

(also he reminds me of equius when his hair is tied back like this and just HNNNG!! this was the BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOME)

sorry heteros, mothmans gay and we’re dating

piss off joseph im clearly with damien i know you want your slutty altarboy holes filled but find somebody else to do it fucks sake begone, thot

screeeeee<3<3<3<3<3

THE END!

not sure if ill post about other dads and their routes. probably not like this lol. im no good at this whole commentary thing. maybe ill collect up some highlights and post them or something.

anyway, im going to go through each of the dads while making decisions i would personally make, where possible. once im done with that ill go back and savescum until ive tried out each option so i can try for all the bad endings. my brother’s girlfriend told me theres a secret ending for joseph but i told her not to spoil it for me (maybe a polyamorous relationship with him and mary?? that would be awesome mary is cool), and i saw in the achievements that you can fuck robert on the first night. otherwise im actively trying to go through this blind and im having a blast so far. this is a very fun game

#dream daddy spoilers #commentary #long post #image heavy

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chansondesalleurs · 7 years ago

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I was tagged by the sublime @corpsequeeninthenorth a while ago, but because I am total shit at doing things I am tagged in, I forgot. Well, that is only half the story. The other half is that partway through my latest social media marathon I felt the need to interject a morass of intrepid hemming and raucous hawing out of (sheer lack of) deference to the rat race of a pull-to-get-on-top lifestyle I keep good faith with, even as it pains me to admit it. Sometimes I'm barely even in a place to divert myself, let alone step up any game at all, but I was in a good place today, so I thought I'd do this for the hell of it. :D

Rules: Answer eight questions and tag eight people

Last Movie I watched: Star Wars (Episode VI) – The Return of the Jedi aka Re-watch Reboot vol. 2

Last Song I listened to: Enjoy the Silence – Depeche Mode

Last Book I read: The Raven King (also part of the Raven Cycle saga) by Maggie Stiefvater

Last thing I ate: a healthy serving of shrimp with spinach & tomatoes a++

Where would I want to Time Travel to: hmmm ordinarily, i'm not exceedingly fond of a whole lot of time-travel scenarios where I also get to fiddle with the past/future as one does, but then I'm thinking I might as well be all in earnest here for the tiniest fraction of a second as I fess up and vomit out my covert, semi-tangible feelings about the live-action BatB remake, insofar as some of the finer points the writers saw fit to come up with in their attempts to update the original in an interesting spin on it grabbed me round the ears and threw me into the wall as soon as I exited the cinema chamber. I'm talking about [SPOILER ALERT!!!] Belle and the Beast bonding over the loss of people who stood as maternal figures for both early in life which, coupled with the added onus of their estrangement from available relationship venues onwards, just about piled on the experience of sameness that was prompted by a visit to Paris (and Belle's own birthplace) in a later bid through the space-time continuum – Belle being let in on the details of her mother's presence there and ultimate fate that Maurice was pretty much unwilling to discuss and having an easier time expressing her shared interests with the Beast, gradually easing into a position where their relationship is fast approaching grounds of equality.

I guess I was really sort of impressed by the writers obviously delving into the basics of the tale and reaching into their special bag of tricks to get their awareness of major themes and underpinnings of the story across, Beauty and the Beast getting to know each other in the most intimate of ways, and both are transformed as a result. Do the writers earn their share of cookies for researching stuff and editing a whole list in accordingly, even despite a melange of familiar limitations and a bunch of tepid drawbacks, yes yes they do! I did also figure that the narrative itself was all too keen to put the Beast as a thrall to the enculturation of male privilege of a kind that is directly responsible for individual victimisation and the perpetuation of abuse and neglect – make no mistake, the Beast being a full-fledged adult by time the curse was put in place, he deserved every bit of what he got – spanning a nexus where gender and status share a common interface of class discrimination and material value. This is the type of magic I’m all about (*ahem*), and it helped flesh out the character quite a bit from a writing standpoint. It is important to me that it made the cut, much thanks to young Adam’s complicated relationship with papa, shining new light on his relationship with Belle, taking on additional dimensions of meaning, and not just for the thrill of watching the adaptation land, and well enough at it, let alone my very peculiar attachment to the original that I so count, certified and with a registration ID to boot, as a favourite. My girl Belle has always gotten to me in a way that no character in a tale has, her desire to make herself known to the world and explore its full potential for adventure on her own terms, all of which she learns to take in stride and accept with the good and the bad. Her bravery in the face of danger, and all her reserves of natural fortitude that she dips into to steel herself against the opinions of those around her, Emma Watson's version of Belle does not disappoint.

Like it is always a pleasure to watch Beauty cut a rebellious and dedicated figure in the confines of her immediate circle and beyond – for the purposes of the film, Belle is made to fit the mold of an inventor in conduct, all too given to the novelty of her makeshift washing machine that she may be left to her own devices while the laundry gets itself done, and her introduction teaching a young girl to read rocks my unwashed, plaid, ingeniously slide-proof socks. Even so, the townspeople and their timid, honest response to Belle during the first song is a wonder for the ages. The idea that not everyone condemns Belle, strange though their perception of her might be, is a refreshing and altogether hopeful concept in itself, at once cognizant of the 1991 animated classic and the changes it brings with it, much as it teases out the connection between Beauty and the Beast, who is similarly inclined in his intellectual pursuits. I did say that Belle was a huge role model for me for a whooping total of reasons, so next time I play-act myself as my Disney princess heroine of choice (for nostalgia's sake) I will be sure to remember: keep going, and know that no matter where it is that you find yourself, no matter the time, the world is as good a place to be as any; there is some ache and suffering and raring trepidation beyond the bubble, but there is beauty in it, too. [/END SPOILER]

(What in the name of all that is holy has BatB to do with the meme close to hand you ask. Did I swap a bunch of perfectly reasonable, self-contained answers for a novel-length reply starting in on the most recent adaptation of the story to hit the big screen and never easing off the gas with this monstrosity of a detour into fairytale-land? I have no idea. It might have something to do with the day being Wednesday and me slowly perishing under an immovable sea of homework, beckoning in its evil, Satanic way, but I won’t say I’m in love. Elsewise, I will be assimilated. tmi, y/y?)

Fictional Character I would hang out with for a day: Luuuke!!!!! (Skywalker, naturally.) I mean, blond and missing a hand? :P

Current Fandom Obsession: Hannibal, A Song of Ice and Fire, BatB, and a smattering of interests tentatively titled ‘Do I even have a fandom to speak of?’ Abandon hope, all ye who enter here.

(Also, SW: The Last Jedi = hype. The wait is too strong for me to handle.)

Anyway, I don't want to lure you into a false sense of security with stuff like that. Basically, this whole tumblr thing has gotten away from me lately, and though I honestly did try to cull it somewhat and get my blog back into some semblance of shape going forward, I fail at the internet. If you, like me, are by any chance sticking it out yet, you are awesome and deserve all the good things, too <3<3<3

I’m tagging everyone and no one in particular. If you want to take a spin with this piece, go right ahead!

#thank you for tagging me <3 #this was fun #I genuinely enjoy interacting with peeps on here even if I don't always show it either #lots of fascinating individuals to pick from #and so many things to learn about you #but then you never truly know someone #personal cw #I want to give you the tl;dr version srsly #I could do more – I always want more #long post for ts #text post #too bad I have the memory of a fruitfly #if you tagged me in one of these and I didn't do it on time I'm the worst #i'm getting better too #I hope I'm not wrong about this #so not ready to be wrong #/whelp #verbosity for ts #batb for ts

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kittoforos · 8 years ago

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A Beginner’s Guide to the Music of Aleksandr Bashlachev

By popular demand, here is a starter kit, in mostly English, to help anyone interested get into the work of my absolute favorite late-Soviet poet (/rock poet/singer-songwriter/guitarist of sorts) and one of my best beloved poets, as they say, всех времён и народов: Aleksandr Bashlachev (Александр Башлачев, or, if you’re feeling extra helpful, Александр Башлачёв— that last “e” is always pronounced “o”).

Aleksandr Bashlachev was born May 27, 1960, died February 17, 1988 (by his own hand; sometimes people count him in the so-called “27 Club”), and left around 60 poems/song texts and various recordings (audio and some video), many of which are available on YouTube (a lot of his stuff is on Spotify, too, if that’s your thing). Despite the short length of his life/career, his body of work was/is a sort of massive hidden influence on Russian rock music/the associated culture from Perestroika forward; he’s not at all well-known among the general public in Russia today, but if you’re at all interested in any of that cultural history (or if you just like Russian rock), he’s worth at least a passing familiarity.

I’m making this post partially because I just love him and want to share his brilliant work,*** but also because his poetry (like, frankly, a lot of Russian poetry) is graceful and rewarding on its own, but also densely loaded with intertextual meaning, and his performance style (messy snarly vocals, messy acoustic guitar, just a bit of a mess really, albeit a through-composed one; also incredibly intense, somehow simultaneously explosive and hypnotic— one of his contemporaries, Yuri Naumov, used the term “thermodynamic”, which I like a lot) can be a rather “acquired taste” for a lot of people, especially for those who aren’t already familiar with the stylistics of Soviet bardic music or, like, garage folk-punk or something idk. I know it took me a long time to get into his stuff, at any rate (but once I did, I didn’t listen to anything else for months).

Themes and frequent images in his work include: Russia’s fate, politics (complicated ones, for which he got “shaken down” by various “security” organizations a couple of times— they only stopped doing that in 1987), spiritual freedom, spiritual honesty (”it’s impossible to sing one way and live another”), human contact, human nature (each unique individual as part of the whole), words, bells, birds, heights, Leningrad, love (unconditional and all-encompassing: “even those I hate, I love— they’re just not good enough people to realize it yet”), the sun, the role of the artist in society, the utopian future, suicide.

Also a key point here: SashBash (that was/is his nickname) wrote not so much songs, as fellow rock musician Boris Grebenshchikov put it, as entire emotional spectacles, so when you watch a video of him singing, there’s a helluva lot to take in on top of the words and music themselves, even though he was given to keeping the mis-en-scene pretty minimalistic (just a snarly Russian dude, his guitar, and his bell bracelets). It can be pretty intimidating stuff overall, (especially if your first language isn’t Russian! and/or you’re not used to listening to poetry in Russian, in which case I’ll tell you up front that this is gonna be really rough, but ultimately totally worth it— all the time I’ve spent listening to this stuff and frantically trying to decipher it has helped me a ton with my Russian!) and it can be hard to know where to start with him because his poetry is very complex and he wrote in a couple of different “genres” (to use the term loosely); hopefully this guide will help.

So with that, here are ten (10) songs (plus important musical/poetic background) to get you started— all listed, linked, and commented on under the cut!

(i love this pic there’s something magical and telling about the combo of rocker-style leather jacket and komsomol lapel pin)

***and because this man desperately wanted to be remembered (he believed that people are reincarnated as soon as they are forgotten, and absolutely did not want to ever come back), and I get so much out of the art he made, I feel like i should try at give back at least a little, if only now, and like this

I see you’re still with us! Excellent! Поехали!

Okay, so, the first thing to know with Russian rock music is, a lot of it is based on (at least) two traditions: Western rock music (and/or the contemporary Soviet perception of it) and the Soviet bardic song genre of the 1960s and 70s (e.g. Okudzhava, Vysotsky). Russian rock tends to be heavily text-based and very individual-driven (in the sense that the lead singer of a group is often pretty much synonymous with the band— it doesn’t really matter who’s playing backup to Boris Grebenshchikov, as long as he’s there, the band is “Akvarium”), and SashBash’s work is definitely no exception to those rules— if anything he takes them to even higher levels. He worked almost exclusively alone, and a lot of his singing uses a dramatized speech-like recitative timbre; his main concern was not so much with rock music as such as with the poetry, with the Word, with expression through the Russian language (великий, богатый и проч. и проч.).

Although that artistic concern remains fairly constant throughout SashBash’s repertoire, his genre choices are less consistent. Roughly speaking, his work can be divided into short comic songs, short serious songs, and long-form epics or meditations. Texts for all the songs I’m about to list can be found at http://www.bards.ru/archives/author.php?id=1927.

Short Serious Songs: (i’m starting with these because because there’s a lot of them, because they include some of his best known songs, and also because they’re just a good place to start to get a feel for what he was about as an artist without buckling in for a twenty-minute Suffering Session— that comes later)

1. Время колокольчиков (The time of little bells) — SashBash’s most famous song, just generally a famous song, gave its name to the whole era in Soviet music culture. If you’re only going to listen to one of these, this is the one, and I highly recommend watching the linked video of him performing it (all of the videos I’ll link here are from a квартирник (apartment concert) at Boris Grebenshchikov’s place— there exist other videos of SashBash performing, but a lot of them are from large concerts which he was very uncomfortable playing, and a lot of the time it shows). Rock and roll, the role of the artist in a time of individualist upheaval, the fate of the Russian soul, and more. (3:20)

2. Лихо (Likha (Slavic mythological personification of Evil); Dashingly) — One of SashBash’s major influences on the Russian rock scene was an eye toward Ancient/Medieval Rus’ as both a source of contemporary Russia’s problems and model of possible futures, whether good or bad. These certainly weren’t new ideas in Russian literature (see: Westernizer vs. Slavophile debates of the 19th century), but SashBash’s deft, unforgettable phrasings (and passionate, agitated delivery) brought rock and roll into conversation with these classic Russian arguments, and imbued them with new urgency. (2:41)

3. Влажный блеск наших глаз (The wet shine of our eyes) — This is a bit sexier. Actually it’s all about sex. And love? And misery. And sex. (3:08)

4. Поезд №193 (Train №193) — This is a straight-up suicidal ideation song, an attempt to catch at a working definition of love, a swift pile up of quick-fix definitions, desperations. A genuinely short song with a pointedly circular structure. (2:16)

5. Вишня — This is the last song Aleksandr Bashlachev wrote whose text and audio survive. It’s a relatively melodic, life-affirming song full of fairy-tale imagery and general generosity of spirit, and the advice the singer gives to the princess character is actually pretty solid imho, especially for the 1980s (be brave, be kind, rejoice in all the things that please your heart and especially in your own freedom/will). (4:17)

6. В чистом поле дожди косые (In the open field slanting rains) — A treatment of a lot of the same themes as Время колокольчиков, but more explicitly and imagistically Russian (as opposed to Soviet), with the theme of rock and roll expanded to art/literature in general, a lot more Orthodox Christian imagery and ideas (anticapitalist), a less ecstatic and more lachrymose ambiguous ending... A lot of people claim this to be the best song he wrote. (4:57 (song starts around 30 seconds in))

Short Comic Songs: (We need a break...such as it is. Soviet humor. If you don’t know the drill, you will shortly. I’ll go ahead and put trigger warnings in for these.)

7. Подвиг разведчика (The feat of an intelligence agent (title of famous WWII movie)) An average late-Soviet asshole with a brutal hangover daydreams about going on Cold War spy adventures, is ridiculous. The linked video has a pretty solid translation in the drop-down. (4:55) TW: alcohol, food, domestic abuse, poison, homophobic slur, torture mention, guns, suicidal ideation, rape mention (casual use of term)

8. Верька, Надька, Любка (Faith, Hope, Love (girls’ names)). Sometimes subtitled Исповедь весеннего рака (Confessional of a spring crab). A very strange, ultimately sweet and oddly earnest song that starts fairly concretely and gets rapidly, cosmically out of hand. A giant confused metaphor for a single Leningrader’s personal ideological development, with metamorphoses. (5:20) TW: food, suicidal ideation, religion, alcohol/drugs, brief casual transphobia (? tbh i’ve been chewing on this line for two years now and in context i’m still not quite sure), unreality

Epics/Meditations: (ok here we go, от винта!)

9. Имя Имён (Name of Names) — A chant of shifting rhythms over a monotonous pair of guitar chords, an uncertain, lurching, demanding, overawed and underserved Credo. (8:19)

10. Ванюша (Vanyusha (boy’s name, affectionate)) — This is an arc-structured song, about trying to understand the loss of a loved one, of a child, to find or make meaning out of that suffering (Bashlachev, whose philosophy in total seems to me simultaneously very Soviet and very Orthodox Christian, believed that all personal development, and indeed all that, which is worthwhile in life, comes to us through suffering— “if your soul hurts, it means it’s working”). It uses a lot of Russian folk structures and motifs, both lyrical and musical. (11:53)

Please note that these are not my personal favorite songs of his, necessarily— just a good first set that I hope represents and can act as a starting point for his whole body of work. Thank you for reading!! Спасибо за внимание!!

BONUS SashBash singing Russian 19th and 20th century pop hits with some friends. Laughter, joy, and contextually inappropriate quotations of Lenin ensue

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eradikeats · 8 years ago

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18 Questions About Music

I was tagged by @and-so-are-you who is my husband/soul mate/trash can friend. Follow him for art and soft-goth vibes x

1. Which bands/artist do you own the most albums by? this question goes two different ways for me because i own whole discographies of many artists/groups and, some of these artists will have longer careers than others so inevitably they will have more albums, you feel. reality is that i own literally everything Maynard James Keenan has recorded and released in an official capacity either with Tool, APC, or Puscifer - plus soundtracks he’s appeared on. The Beatles because i took all of my parents collection and ripped it to my laptop. i own A LOT of Bowie and Prince, all of Muse’s albums, every Joy Division/New Order, The Cure, Deftones, White Lies, IAMX, Elbow. generally, if i get heavy into a band i become a collector.

2. What was the last song you listened to? The Human League - Seconds

3. What’s in your CD/Record player right now? i was listening to Cocteau Twins Heaven Or Las Vegas while i cooked dinner because you can kind of just yodel along without actually focusing on words

4. What was the last show you attended? white lies at music hall of williamsburg last month

5. What was the greatest show you’ve been to? oh jesus. there’s been a few tbh. elbow at reading 2011 was insane because i was back in the UK and a fucking rainbow erupted over the stage while they performed the birds and i totally lost it. a perfect circle at lollapalooza was the time i became someone Other. IAMX in London last year was emotional as shit cause i was coming down from a stomach flu, was with @simonjpg and @and-so-are-you and they played This Will Make You Love Again and wow. Muse’s War Child gig with fuckin DEAD STAR and the whole of the internet erupted asking me if i was ok which, no i certainly was not. i saw Stevie Wonder for free two summers ago which WOW. funny i’m naming legends but once i saw O’Brother open for Biffy Clyro and they blew me the fuck away. i’ve been a fan ever since and i’m so pleased they’re doing really well now.

i’ve been blessed with some incredible gigs.

6. What was the worst show you’ve ever been to? yikes. ive never been to a show where the band i’ve paid to see are awful but ive suffered some horrible openers, let me tell you. the worst was when i went to see brian fallon and his opener, i literally do not remember who, was so terrible i got a headache halfway through the set and had to leave the entire gig because i was in agony.

7. What is the most musically involved you have ever been? uh, in what capacity? well. i play violin and am a singer, i sight read better than i sight sing though. sight reading means im kind of okay at piano although my left hand prowess is non-existent, really. but i mean, if we’re being open and honest, i actually am employed in the music industry, so that’s pretty damn involved if you ask me lol.

8. What show are you looking forward to? SO MANY. ive got some huge festivals this year - Gov’s Ball, Glastonbury, and Lollapalooza (supposing i get tix to the latter). elbow in november, New Power Generation at the start of April. who knows what else will get announced - hoping for some official Franz Ferdinand dates (besides their gov’s ball set) or an APC tour.

9. What is your favorite band shirt? i have this v-neck black shirt from when i saw The Cure last year. the only size they had was xxl and i got it just because im compelled to get shirts at every gig i attend. its honestly the most comfortable shirt i own and i use it as pajamas.

10. What musician would you like to hang out with for a day? honestly, id love to spend a day with Dan Smith from Bastille. im not even like super, duper heavy into the band (i love them but not how i love many others) i just want to get some sandwiches and talk about movies with him. we’d have so much to discuss. probably would also love to hang with lorde and osmose some of her glamour.

11. Who is one musician or group you wish would make a comeback? like...from the dead? bowie or prince, full stop. come back and make a new album, Fair To Midland. such a specific, identifiable sound - no one is filling their space now they’re gone.

12. Who is one band/ artist you’ve never seen live but always wanted to? BOWIE AND PRINCE. im haunted by the time Prince came to NYC when i was in college and i was too fucking poor to see him. rammstein have decided to play an NYC date for the first time in fucking years and i just so happen to be at glastonbury when they’re here (i am bitter). TOOL is on this list but WILL BE REMOVED IN JUNE, CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE. also, recently lady gaga but specifically during her fame monster years. she came round when i was in college and my housemates went - regret it because she seems like an amazing performer.

13. Flawless albums? shit. wow. ok. ive got many. Radiohead - In Rainbows, Tori Amos - Little Earthquakes, Prince - Purple Rain, NIN - Year Zero, Cocteau Twins - Heaven Or Las Vegas, White Lies - Ritual (i swear to god, you have no fucking idea how far ahead of its time this album was- it’s six years old and it sounds like it was produced yesterday), Manic Street Preachers - Everything Must Go, elbow - the seldom seen kid, Ghinzu - Blow, and Echo & The Bunnymen - Ocean Rain - to name a few. i find when you listen to a lot of music, you wind up discovering how much art is really out there which is probably why my pretentious ass has a longer list than most idk

14. How many concerts have you been to, total? please don’t make me count. a very high number.

15. Who have you seen the most live? Muse

16. What is your favorite movie soundtrack? I have three really. The Fountain, A Single Man, and Pride & Prejudice. Also, not films but Braid, Bastion, and Transistor are some of the best video game soundtracks. I can’t really go a month without listening to them.

17. What was your last musical ‘phase’ before you wisened up? i turned my ‘phase’ into a career, i think we’re shit outta luck on the ‘wisened up’ front.

18. What is your ‘guilty pleasure’ that you hate to admit liking? i love the shit out of K-Pop. it’s been like a 7 year quiet thing in the back of my mind, but if you want to learn some SHINee/EXO/f(x) moves, i got you!

i forgot im supposed to tag people omg uh ok @zombeesknees because she is my queen and i want to know what she’s into; has @simonjpg done this yet? idk, do this if you want!

#music i like #about me #i know im forgetting important things here why are these so hard to do

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devosivad · 8 years ago

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Sleep Schedule Zero

eIts 520 in the morning and im awake. Tired but awake. I dont really want to go to sleep to be honest with myself. Do you ever get in those moods where you know you should close your eyes and go to sleep, but you just dont want to? Well thats me. I dont wanna take off these headphones. I dont want to turn off the music or close my laptop. I know im going to regret this when i wake up at noon or something and realize ive pissed away half my Sunday. I just hope ill think was worth it when I do wake. There’s always some sort of realization i come to when i stay up super late and get tumblr. Whenever i get on here and write its because ive realized something new about myself. I believe self reflection is very important in growing as a person. As someone who looks inward without even trying, I think im growing into a quality individual. All these little changes are beginning to add up into something greater. I’m getting better at school, putting my priorities first (except right now). I’ve made a better effort in going to the gym these past two weeks. I can tell my body is changing in reaction to it as well. My belly is going down fast and my torso as a whole has tightened up a lot. It’s pretty remarkable what a little time working out will do for you. I’d also have to attribute that to my diet lately as well. Lots of fruit, chicken, pizza, and of course water and coffee. Pretty boring diet but i havent eaten out in awhile so ill take it.

Tonight ive discovered my car goal for the future is the M2. The other day in macro i was super bored so i built my own M2 and it totaled out under 60K which was pretty surprising. I tried to ball park my potential expenses for a year to see how much id need to earn/save to be able to afford the car. Ideally my major should easily net me a 40k + salary immediately, so a year or two of working/saving and i’ll have a new M2. This is probably 3-4 years ahead of me but either way im excited to have found an obtainable goal that even I can be patient for. I watched some videos on exhaust sounds and found the exhaust bmw offers (non standard) is actually my favorite sounding. There’s so many crackles and pops and it has the raspiness just like the RB and 2JZ engines i love. Needless to say im excited that ill be able to own a modern day inline six powered car.

Im listening to a compilation of music from Your Lie in April right now and Its got me thinking about emotions. Having seen the show twice now, once in Japanese and the other in English, I know they use a lot of the same music throughout the show to capture happy moments and sad moments. The music captures reflective moments and adds to the emotion of the scene. Knowing how the show ends, I suppose one might say this is sad music. Based on association to the sad event it makes sense. But since it was used in both happy and sad moments im having a hard time feeling sad or happy listening to it. I feel like it puts me somewhere in the middle, not really emotionless but content. My expression isnt any different than it usually is so that doesnt help me. All i really know is the sound of the piano is intoxicating. I find myself pushing on an invisible piano, keying along with the song. Although i have absolutely no idea what im keying because ill find myself playing along with a high key followed by a lower key, and my finger is pushed down to the right instead of the left (lower side of the piano). I’d love to learn to play piano, but i definitely need some training to get my feet on the ground, and then id want my own piano and my own place to play it at. That awkward stage where you cant play anything would bother me. I also wonder if id enjoy it the same way hearing it from my own playing. I know it would take such a long time to play near the same level as what im listening to now and me being impatient, I cant wait a long time.

On the line of what im listening to and where its from, I think its my new favorite show. By new favorite show, I mean that in the sense that its a new favorite, not a new show. Ive been watching an episode here and there since we got Netflix back and Im on the fourth episode. This means im gonna watch this show again for a 3rd time. The 2nd time i watched it wasnt very long ago either, so the show is still fresh on my mind. Nothing that happens in the show is new to me. Maybe ill see some more stuff in the background i didnt see the first two times but other than that its all familiar. When we watch shows and movies we escape to that world. I think i just really enjoy that world .Its bright and colorful and full of emotion. Some people shy away from things that will make them sad and I can resonate with that to a degree. But i also believe that something bad will allow you to see the good in something you never really noticed before. “You never know what you had until you lost it”. With the sadness in the show, there was just as much happiness. I’ve experienced sadness in my own life and it sucks. Obviously it sucks. I’ve also experienced happiness, memories that still make me smile today. I can appreciate the little things in life that make me happy a little better now that I know what life is like when youre sad. It’s kind of like a beautiful spring day. Where the winter was cold and long and dreary. But now the sun is out and the ground is warming up but not too warm. You can just feel the energy. The birds are in the trees singing, the wind is once again a nice breeze instead of a brutal cold. On those spring days you really notice how great life is. You finally pick your head up and realize you enjoy the little things about life. We tend to lose sight of a lot of things that go on in our daily lives. On that beautiful spring day, the trip to the grocery store was never more thrilling. Getting to your destination is actually a bummer now because its so beautiful out. We get so caught up in work and school that we forget about the rest of our day. As humans we have a really narrow line of focus and its too easy to stay locked in on one thing for too long. If that thing isnt good for you, you can imagine how detrimental that can be. So Your Lie in April is my new favorite show for what it gives me. It makes me happy, sad, reflective.

Talking more about self reflection, im pretty happy with myself lately. I no longer care so much about what other people might think of me. I find it easier to be myself around people I dont know. I do what i want to do now and it feels great. One topic thats been on my mind lately is relationships. I haven’t really had a true girlfriend in years but I just dont care. I dont count any short term flings, but in reality most of my relationships never lasted that long. I dont know if its that I can tell it wont work out in the long run so i just close up shop and move along. Or if its something else. I know its never good to judge someone before you have time to actually meet them, but I knew from the get go that my last fling was nothing to me after my other head was out of the equation. Idk if its better that I tried even though I was sure it wouldn’t last long or if its better to just not go there in the first place. Im horribly picky with girls and theres 2 that i dropped the ball on and regret now. The solution to that would be to stop judging so much before you really know who they are, but if ends up not working out, and your initial judgement ends up being true, its hard to justify trying again if theyre not the “perfect” person, which is hard to find. For now Ill just wait.

Well this is gonna be the end of the post now. Im at that point where my body is really heavy and I can only really feel whats right in front of me. If i wasnt typing this entire time i doubt id be able to feel my fingers. If you read this then I hope it offered something of value to you, whatever that may be.

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supergenial · 4 years ago

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Top Doujin Albums 2020

Well, that year sure had it's ups and downs, mostly downs, but all of us who made it to this year got to hear Revo from sanhora rapping and quoting Obama, and isn't that what life is really all about. Once again it's time for me to go over my yearly picks in case you're looking for some cool stuff you might not have checked out, or just rejoice at seeing stuff you already like getting praised by an internet nobody. Much like last year, winter comiket doesn't count but the previous winter comiket does count, and the order is still random. Now let's dive into it.

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-We Are Yesod by Yesod (Electronic, Trance) (Bandcamp)

Absolute kino album. Just by looking at the album cover you already know you're in for something special. It really reminds me of the classic Kasai Hardcores album covers, just a bunch of goofy djs getting together and having fun, and the album really does vibe like that. The song INSANE MADMAN absolutely lives up to the name, and fatal sphere is also as killer as the name would suggest, I absolutely recommend checking out these guys. Also watch litmus's newest video, it's just fucking hilarious how he had fun with this one.

-Matsuyukisou by Ideadoll (Lesbians, Story Music) (Booth) (Translation)

youtube

When Lyse said they'd be in a collaboration with some people I never heard about I expected only one thing: I'll listen to the Lyse track a whole lot, and ignore the other ones. I was so wrong! Just an absolute fool. If anything the first track ended up being my favorite, and the second one is just so endearing, god, what a nice package all in all. It's a short, sweet, sad story of two girls meeting and being struck by fate. Nothing but love for Akari and Coto for hitting such a home run, I expect great things from them. And hey don’t look at me concerning the genre, they’re the ones that tagged it “Girls Love” on booth instead of any more conventional music genre.

-Zenoth by Symholic (Symphonic Metal, Story Music) (Booth) (Translation)

youtube

Continuing the vengel and maisery timelines we get more of this mechanical angel epic. From the get go just looking at Demythology in the tracklist you know the callbacks are gonna hit you and they really do. I feel like those previous albums were indeed interesting but they didn't hit me nearly as hard as this one, which was an instant knockout. It's actually really hard to tell whether my favorite is the leading track, the eponymous, or kioku no hana, and that's a really good sign. Guess I'm finally a simpholic (come on, I've been waiting years to use this pun, someone else already does an excellent job translating their stuff so I never have any reason to talk about them here!)

-LIVEWEAPON 06 by Lolistyle Gabbers (Lolicore) (Bandcamp... physical only???)

Ah, definitely The Problematic Pick. I'm as displeased as the next guy with the naming sense of the lolicore genre, but what can I say, the music do be slapping. Hands To Yourself plays pretty well with the Eizouken theme, the track ID lets me remember how much potential ID Invaded had, and "OH MY GAH!" is just an adorable track overall. Lost in space though, god, such a fat track, someone give this album an award or something, I mean I guess this is an award it's just not really worth anything lol.

-Valkyrja by OddAi (Symphonic Metal) (Booth... physical only 😒)

youtube

I already praised the leading track back when I translated it and I cannot overstate how cool it is. This thing was seriously stuck in my brain for a very long time. But you'd think since I only praised the lead track and the album is mostly instrumental I wouldn't include it as a "Great Album" buuuuuuuut... Giallarhorn and Fimbulvetr are reeeally good, though they make the album quite weird, could've just bundled Fimbulvetr and Valkyrja and call it a day, just a really focused epic piece, but with Giallarhorn and Ragnarok being more on the electronic side of sounds, the balance is definitely skewed, specially with Fimbulvetr coming after Giallarhorn and before Ragnarok. It just feels like a very weirdly formatted album overall. Still, as mismatched as it is... it's extremely my thing, so it gets the pass, go ahead and sue me for liking weirdly done things.

Rei by Kinema106 (Vtuber??) (Listen on youtube)

Is it really from this year? I'm sure some tracks are much older... But this album was indeed released this year, so I'll count it. Karasu, Shinchoku dou deshou, and Imperial Parade are top picks for sure, but the entire runtime is really quite pleasant, it's really cool how Uru can sound really glamorous on tracks like remember me and then like a total brat on tracks like shinchoku dou deshou despite not really having that much range. Definitely a good year for Uru, just hope she and Tom keep putting out great stuff every year instead of getting engulfed by her vtuber gig.

And here's some some other cool runner ups:

-Darkness by Seraph: Fiine no hitsugi will always slap

-MONOLOGIA by Otsuki-sama Koukyoukyoku : Purgatorium definitely on my favorite tracks for the year. Wait what do you mean it’s from 2019? Well this album is from 2020 so it stays.

-Seiren Femme Fatale by Ariabl’eyeS: It’s Ariabl’eyeS of course they’d be in my favorites for the year!

-Synchronicity by KOTONOHOUSE: Always thought they have one of the coolest names ever, but now they also got one of the better albums of the year too!

-Reigetsu Reception by Genkaku Aria: A latecomer so I haven’t listened to it that much yet, but I’m extremely super impressed with it so far so I’m throwing it in too.

So yeah, pretty good year. I mean, not really, for reasons that don't concern this post, but like, music-wise it was pretty decent. With that said my small announcement this time is that I will be translating a lot less this year. I already said I was toning down my output a while ago but idk, it still feels like I post way too often. Just for reference, this 2020 I translated over 70 songs. That's an embarrassingly high number. So I'm changing the schedule to posting only once per month plus some extras here and there when I feel like it. So yeah, let's have a great, lazier year this time around, see you all next time and remember: if you like an artist with a small follower base, tell them you love their stuff! I'm sure they'll be thrilled about it!

#review #yes it's a red flannel type of year this is not the time for the yellow flannel #NOR the blue one

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sheilacwall · 5 years ago

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Velvet Negroni is Trying to Make Music That’s Built to Last in an Ethereal Digital Age

When we chat his most recent record, NEON BROWN (via 4AD), has been out for less than a full week. But it’s already beginning to add layers to an increasingly mythological narrative. It’s not just Nutzman’s background being gradually woven together with each new review and published blurb, but it’s also the behind-the-scenes contributions that penetrate larger swaths of popular culture. The track “Waves” from Velvet Negroni’s previous release T.C.O.D. was played by Justin Vernon at Kanye West’s famously rural writing camp in Wyoming, resulting in a contribution to opening track “Feel the Love” on Kanye and Kid Cudi’s collaboration album, Kids See Ghosts. More recently, he’s lent vocals on both “iMi” and “Sh’Diah” from Bon Iver’s new album, i,i.

READ: First Look Friday: Meet Donavon — the Soul of the Algorithm & Disciple of D’Angelo

These high-profile contributions aren’t just Wiki-friendly Easter eggs and fine print liner notes; they’re a clear indicator that both Nutzman’s voice and creative direction possess a unique resonance that is parting the seas of an oft-impenetrable musical kingdom.

NEON BROWN offers an accessible entry-point to hear Jeremy Nutzman’s evolving artistry at work. Album highlight “Wine Green” is an instantly recitable, dancehall-esque anthem awash in peppy adlibs and ascending jabs of bass. “Poster Child” showcases a catchy, iridescent love-song-hook that glows vividly while the downtempo “Feel Let” spins out soft, palatable utterances that feel as if they’re being belted from a woozy, late-night cab ride home.

We talked with Velvet Negroni to explore the album, his creative inspiration, and a rapidly changing music landscape.

Title: Girboix Carmelo Artist: Velvet Negroni

Can you walk me through your contributions on Bon Iver’s album and Kids See Ghosts?

Justin Vernon played [Kanye West and Kid Cudi] “Waves” and it was the first thing that perked their ears that day so they got into it a little bit. There’s a part of the song that goes, “I can feel it in my bones!” I think it was basically just that little snippet that they just took that energy and vibe into “Feel the Love.”

So the inspiration was more cadence than lyrics or production?

Yeah, there wasn’t a sample. While Justin was in Wyoming, I was at his crib working, I was there rehearsing to perform a couple of dates with him. He had helped to work on the record a little bit previously.

How did you two originally link?

I play in a band with a couple of cats that he grew up with essentially and so that’s how that intro went long ago. It was kind of fun. We were just around sometimes, and we got to know each other a little bit. And then my friend Ryan Olsen had played what I had so far of the record for him, he was really excited by it and the next time he saw me he kind of just opened up his place as a base, like “If you need somewhere to finish this or work on it you should come out.”

Source: Artist

Can you tell me about the recording process and what went into your new album, NEON BROWN?

A lot of different things but mostly just good vibes, a good schedule and good hours. We would at least kind of sketch out one or two tracks, at least two things every day. Then after a little bit of that, circle back to one that we had worked on previously. The ones with real potential kind of just flowed out of the fucking mess and felt kind of obvious-ish, I guess. It’s like sifting for gold, eventually you keep whittling it down into a body of work that’s ready.

How do you feel now that it’s out?

It’s just exciting that people are listening to it. The album has been done for a pretty sizable chunk of time, that happened long ago it feels like, but now it’s just, knowing that people can listen to it…that’s exciting.

There’s a wide range of sounds on the album, some heady and stirring but also lighter notes. It’s interesting to see you do both.

It’s a natural thing in the songwriting process. Especially when I’m working with Elliott (Tickle Torture) and Simon (Psymun), there’s no off-limits. There’s that many more influences, like each person has a toolbox. Then there’s that added onto the writing process. So, we’re taking from a pretty wide range of shit just in everybody’s own mind and then putting them together. I don’t think any of us think about the style of the song as it relates to the album until after the fact.

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What new artists inspire you right now?

I’ve been excited about Yves Tumor on Warp and listening to this cat Mk.Gee. I can’t think of anything else off the top of my head that I’ve really been jacked on. I’m kind of just stepping back into remembering that I can listen to other people’s music you know, like on my own, really just listen to music. Usually, I’m just in such a creative mode in my headspace, or I’m not listening to anything, or I’m working on my shit.

When you were first discovering music at an early age, finding discarded records on a neighbor’s lawn, which albums were especially formative for you?

In that pack of CDs that I found, I remember some 311, Soundgarden, some Metallica, Lords of Acid. I think there was a Crime Mob CD, some Tupac and even Marilyn Manson. Those were my youngest memories of having music that wasn’t church music.

That was huge for me. But I was so young that when I was playing music, I wasn’t coming at it from a composing aspect at all. It was beyond me how you could even make something like that. I didn’t have any of the experiences that I have now to desensitize me to the wonderment of music in general.

Photo Credit: Rachel Kauffman for Okayplayer

What was the original intention of keeping you from being exposed to that music?

I mean those were just my parents’ rules. They were religious and didn’t think that anything else was worthwhile except for Christian music. I was practicing playing piano for at least one hour every single day and my mom would sit on the bench next to me, there was no getting out of it really.

We’re now living in a totally digital age. How do you feel the streaming era is changing music?

Oversaturation is a real thing, but there’s also so much more of a platform. I think that, eventually, for the most part, good stuff will be discovered. Like there’s too many people listening, seeing and talking amongst themselves deep in the Internet at all times that I think that the good stuff, the truth will prevail. It’s just a different style with music in general, because it used to be the furthest thing away to just go to a bedroom somewhere and record. Most people couldn’t afford to even rent studio time, let alone rent a studio and then then take their time writing songs in the studio as they go. People used to write a song, arrange a song, figure it out, get really good at it and then go record it. Now, it’s pretty much the norm to write a song as you’re playing and then you have the ability to manipulate audio. It changed the format.

When I first got into recording on my own, an amazing feature of it was that it moved so fast and I found myself making a couple of happy accidents. It was really exciting. Like, wow, what happened there? It went from writing songs and then finding happy accidents to just showing up and relying on happy accidents, rather than really spending time with the chord progression of the arrangement ahead of time.

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I think from the critic or audience’s perspective, you also have less time to win over an audience with a shrinking attention span. Not everyone is even really around for a full album to listen from front to back.

That’s huge, yes. You can grab your albums out of thin air. There was no way to pirate an album unless you stole it from a store. So, it was physical, and I think it meant more just inherently then. It meant more on a tangible level. Like, I paid eleven bucks for this album, I’m not sure if I like it yet, but I’m gonna listen to it and keep listening.

The attention span is so fast that I think there’s more people trying to just jump on a wave or catch a wave and make stuff that’s relevant right then, instead of thinking like a whole album. Instead of maybe making a piece of work that is supposed to stand the test of time.

What’s it like to be a musician in 2019? Especially considering it’s increasingly rare to make a living off your art.

You’re correct with that being a rarity, it also depends on what one person’s definition of living and what you’re satisfied with. I’ve been making music for a real long time, but only recently have I even taken into consideration, oh yeah, I guess there’s a chance I could make some money from this. Really. I can only try and imagine what it was like doing what I’m trying to do right now when the Internet wasn’t the Supreme Being.

Photo Credit: Tim Saccenti

Adam Isaac Itkoff is a freelance writer living in New York City. You can follow him (and us!) on Twitter.

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