#if this goes on for like. two more days ill get to a doctor maybe

[autism-corner]

big food wants me to 'eat healthy' but then how will my tummy make funny noises??

[nyx-is-missing]

hello! Can you write a Clarisse La Rue x reader where they met before Clarisse got sent to camp halfblood when they were little and were best friends then Clarisse left for camp with no explanation then years later reader goes to camp and sees Clarisse for the first time in years and it’s kinda awkward but cute

thanks :)

This is kinda long sooorrry, to help, the part where she gets to camp (kinda) will be in green

Girls on film 📷

Clarrise la rue x fem!reader

Warnings and explanations: bad words (take the kids out of the living room she swears) gender is specified cause it was written as wlw, but it doenst actually makes a diference, fluff, like two sentences, there is a kiss in the picture but they dont actually kiss sorry.

Unspecified parent gender for both sides so yall can pick wichever

Trying not to kill myself.

That was what i was doing 15 hours ago, just as any normal teenagers living (or as i prefer saying fighting for the soul to stay on the body) during finals week.

In my room there was nothing but piles and piles of normal work, piles for extra credit, piles of old quizzes to try to get me prepared for the new ones and a dumb incomplete project for photography class that was due tomorrow.

Okay ill admit, i had a month to make that, and all i needed to do was shoot pictures, but that was the problem, i prefer taking pictures of people, their emotions, whatever they might be, just never ceases to amaze me.

And my dumb project made take pictures of....landscapes.

Not too bad, if i had any actual real talent for that type of photography, but i dont, every picture gets ruined somehow, its the lightning, the lack of it, my camera falls, gets full of dirt and i get so mad that i just give up.

That whole speach was necessary for me to explain what i was doing 14 hours ago, and that would explain what i was doing 5 minutes ago.

14 hours ago i decided to shoot the photos, i could try many times before it got dark, and if o was lucky enough i wouldnt go insane before the golden hour, and could actually get some nice pictures.

I grabbed my totte bag taking with me only the necessary, camera stuff, the camera, some snacks and my notebook to upload the pictures before i went mad.

13 hours ago i was running to save my life.

And do you know that moment went you go through so much your mind decides to erase it?

That happened, now, what i do remember, i was sitting in a bench by a calm road not too far from the town, i had got some actually good pictures, some of me, some of the trees, some of a butterfly, maybe three cars had passed by since i was there, driving slowly, always saying hi and doing a thumbs up, normal, friendly people from the town.

And then i heard a noise that shook the trees.

I remember seeing something, but never what, i remember running to home as fast as i could, feeling my heartbeats in my neck, i remember the noise, but the people in the streets looked at me like there was nothing behind me and i went crazy

I remember getting home, having a desperate talk with my parent while they got my suiticase ready, and i dont remember a single word.

I remember a funny looking guy my age that got to my house, with goat legs and a more desperate look, and i remember one last hug before i left.

And thats all, aside from a hell of a lot of running nobody cares.

Aparently i passed out from shock or exaustion because i woke up in a unknown place, at night, in a hospital bed, with no actual doctors other than 15 year olds teenagers.

And a horseman standing in the corner, with quite a intelectual look actually.

And let me tell you guys that after the talk we had, if somebody told me i would marry queen Elizabeth within 4 days, i would just belived it.

Because nothing ever in my life would ACTUALLY beat up the level of crazyness of finding out i DO have another parent, they are just, A FUCKING GOD. GREEK. GODS. AH.

Then, after telling me my whole life was in fact, a big fat lie, the horseman... left.

Telling me i should sleep in the infirmary this night for precaution and that he was going to get me to a cabin tomorrow.

Like that was the most normal thing to ever happen to a human, he said goodnight and left.

While i sat there just trying to...basically form a sentence that wasnt "for fucks sake what the fuck was that"

I would have loved to say that i did slept that night, dreaming about glory and greek myths but that did not happened, at all.

I walked around the infirmary for hours, opening every cabinet and trying to make my mind to something, i searched for my stuff, and thankfully found my camera, with some pictures i hadnt noticed i had taken, one specific had a blurred thing in the forest.

When the first rays of sunlight appeared i got dressed, and decided that, in order to prove to myself (and probably to the mental hospital afterwards) i was not insane, i needed proof that i was actually living, actually there, being a demigodess, thats what they called.

Very few people were up already, and i did received some weird looks, it was clear nobody knew me, that was fine, i didnt knew anybody either.

I walked around taking some pictures, sometimes getting lost, but everything amazed me, the forest, the cabins, the stables, i found the entrance to a beach too, and then i got to the training area, aparently, i stayed far away, god forbid i woke up from this nightmare with a spear in my head, oh no, that would be bad.

Openning my camera i zoomed in the people, my speciality, it was sweet, seeing them trully smile, and not pretend for the picture, it was a genuine feeling the camera would keep forever, i zoomed around other peoples faces, but my camera focused on a face i could never forget, and she looked back at me, and realized i was there, but not that i was me, because she came towards me with a angry look.

Ill admit, the look scared me as hell, so much i tried to pretend i was never taking pictures of her, i slightly changed the angle and kept my face hidden behind the camera.

Do i need to say that did not fucking worked? No? Thank you.

"Who the fuck do you think you are taking random pictures of pe-"

She yanked my camera off of me mid sentence and stopped completely, looking like she had seen a ghost for some seconds.

"(Y/n)?"

"Clari?"

"How- what are you doing here!?"

She asked, with a worried look, still kind of confused, she did this look since we were little girls, and for a moment i had a big deja vu.

Two little girls running around, playing all day, telling each other secrets and stories, running to hug each other eveytime they were close, i still saw that girl in her eyes, but by her previous look, she did not.

"What am i doing here? What are YOU doing here? One day you dissapear without a trace, and your family said you went to a new school even though it was the summer, and now i find you sparring with a spear? You are that too? A demigoddes, i mean?"

I spoke fast, nervous, as if my time in the world with her would end just as it did once.

Instead of responding me right away, clarisse did something that maybe would scare every single soul she knew in the past years.

She hugged me. Hard.

Breathing me in, and not letting me go exactly as you would expect of someone who hasnt seen me in years.

"I couldnt tell you anything... it wouldnt be safe...im sorry, i missed my friend... i missed you."

I just looked at her for some seconds, and then hugged her again, this time i was the one making it extra tight, i was the one going insane by the reconforting smell of her shampoo, praying that she couldnt feel my heartbeats against her chest, and how strong they were.

"Just.. dont leave me again okay? And ill forgive you, i promisse"

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

the girl next door 6

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as age gap, manipulation, chronic illness, noncon/dubcon, coercion, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: A new neighbour moves in and upends your already disarrayed life.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself.

This lewk but silverfox

You can’t remember the last time you had the house to yourself. Even if your mother’s just next door, it feels a little lighter around there. And you’re happy for her. Maybe having Steve around will be good. He can be an outlet so she doesn’t have to put all her frustrations on you. 

She was happy when she left, even excited. That’s another rarity in your life. 

You start your day off with a tea. The apple cinnamon bags are a bit old so you use two. You bring the cup into your room and get your table set up with your pencils and sketchbook. You open the window to let in the sunlight, the natural light much brighter than the yellowed bulb above. 

You know your mom would tell you to do something more useful than just scribble in your sketchbook. You got the dishes done last night. Steve offered to help but you deflected as you foresaw your mom’s disapproval. You can’t let company pick up your slack. 

You try to wipe away the anxiety of last night. It’s over now. You shouldn’t have worry very much about it again. 

You finish your tea. It’s cold by the time you get to the dregs. You sit back to look over your sketch. Your eyes feel a bit fuzzy from hyperfocusing on that one stamen. You rub your brow and yawn. The sun shifts and you look over at the old alarm clock on your nightstand. It’s close to noon. 

Something else catches your eye. You look up at the window across from yours. The curtain ripples around the gap before it’s pulled open from inside. Steve stands on the other side of the pane. Can he see you? 

You can’t tell as he turns away without acknowledgement. The glare of the sun should hide your room well enough. You never really thought of it as your blinds are closed more often than not. 

You get up to rinse out your cup. You stretch your legs as you pace in the kitchen. You’re restless. You’re so used to your mom and her demands and expectations, that having your own time feels aimless. 

You could surprise your mother with dinner. Have it in the oven when she comes home. It’s still early but you can make something more than boxed macaroni. It will be a good cushion to fall back on when you remind her about tomorrow’s appointment. 

🏠

When your mother returns, you can see the fatigue around her eyes. For as little as she goes out, you’re not surprised. What strikes you, is how happy she is. You help her to her recliner and she sighs as she leans back. 

“Such a nice man,” she keeps repeating.  

You smile and let her regale you with a recounting of her day. Still, you can’t help but wait for the pendulum to swing back to normal. She leans her head in her hand, her eyes distant. 

“I swear, the universe sent him to me,” she says, “it had to. It was how much I need someone.” She drops her hand and traces her finger around the armrest, “sick, got a lazy daughter, stuck in this damn house...” 

There it is. You frown. You mash your hands together and waver. 

“I made dinner,” you offer. 

“I don’t want KD,” she snips. 

“I made... I made shepherd’s pie,” you offer meekly, “should be almost done.” 

“Hm, wondered what that stench was.” 

You frown. “I can put it in the fridge for tomorrow. Be good to have something we can just heat up after the doctor’s.” 

“Doctor?” She grumbles, “eh... I forgot.” 

She slumps and her eyes dull. You can’t help the pang in your chest. Sometimes you wish it was you who was sick. It feels like you deserve it more than her. 

“Hopefully it’s good. If you can get the surgery--” 

“Surgery!? Surgery. You keep going on about the damn thing,” she barks. “They can’t fix me, girl, get that through your head.” 

“I know, mom, but they can help--” 

“Like you help me? Crittering around here like a rat!” She hits the armrest violently, “would ya leave me be?” She closes her eyes and turns her face away, deflating once more, “ruined a good day...” 

You sniffle and slowly turn on your heel. You should have known better. You should have just left her alone. As much as she rants about you staying in your room, she prefers you there. Out of sight, out of mind. 

🏠

The next day, your mother doesn’t say much. Her silence is just a bitter as her words. You don’t push it. She gets in the car without argument and you set off into town. Even if she says it’s a waste of time, she listens intently to the doctor and answers all his questions. It’s only when she has to go through the tests that she shows her agitation. 

After some hours spent at the specialist clinic, you’re free to go. Your mom is just as quiet. You feel her mood roiling in the air. Her hand is shaking to the point that she’s hissing at it. 

You steer down to the corner and linger at the stop sign. 

“Mom,” you squeak, “you want some orange julius? A treat for the way home?” 

“Don’t talk to me like a damn child,” she snarls. “Let’s just go. I’m tired. Got no blood left in me.” 

You nod and bite your tongue. Maybe you can just put her to bed. Her naps are a respite, though you find yourself anxious in the silence, terrified of waking her prematurely.  

As you pull onto the suburban avenue, you slow and approach your drive. You pull in and shut off the engine. You get out and go around to help your mom. You open her door and she hauls herself out, tisking under her breath. 

“Didn’t see him,” she mutters. 

“Good afternoon,” Steve’s voice answers your question before you can ask. You look over the hood as he waves from his porch, “busy day?” 

Your mother steels herself and forces a smile, “just went to the doctors.” 

“Oh, everything okay?” He asks. 

“Sure,” she chimes, “just some tests. Nothing serious.” 

“Good to hear,” he stands behind the porch railing, arches crossed, “day’s not over yet. Still lots of time to enjoy the sun.” 

“Mhmm,” you mom grabs onto your wrist, shaking you as leans into you. “Nice day out.” 

“I was gonna do up a milkshake, if you ladies wanted to join me I got plenty to go around.” 

“Milkshakes?” Your mother considers, “mm, I’d have to change out of these.” She looks down, “smell like a hospital.” 

“Sure, take your time,” Steve says, “how about you, honey? I got strawberry. You seem like a strawberry type.” 

“Eh, she’s more a vanilla type,” your other cackles. “Plain.” 

“Got that too,” Steve ignores the joke. “I understand if you’re tired out though. Don’t wanna be too desperate over here, just wouldn’t mind the company.” 

“I’ll be over soon,” your mom assures him, “she’s got some laundry to do.” 

She keeps hold of you and points you towards the house. You help her inside, even though she does her best to hid how she clings to you. Her steps are uneven and stunted. You get through the front door and help her sit on the chair you keep by the door, just in case. 

“Goddamnit,” she’s shaking pretty bad. “Help me, you dumb girl.” 

“I... I don’t...” 

“Get my goddamn inhaler. I forgot it this morning.” 

“Oh, uh, okay.” 

You hurry down the hall and to bathroom. It isn’t in the cabinet. You go back out and scan the table. Not their either. You find it next to her recliner. You wish she’d keep it one place. You go back to her and hand it over. 

“I’m gonna go over,” she says before she huffs from the canister, “you’re gonna stay here. Out of my way.” 

“Alright,” you agree. You prefer that anyway. 

She takes a minute before she gets up. She shooes you away and you retreat to your bedroom. You sit on your bed and wring your hands, waiting as you listen to her. She doesn’t say goodbye before she leaves. Only the front door slamming lets you know she’s gone. 

You exhale and pull the fold out table up to the edge of the bed. You open your sketchbook and stare at the pencil. You don’t feel like drawing but you have nothing else to do. You just sit, looking at the amaryllis. You can pick out every flaw in your work. You close the cover and frown. 

A knock startles you and you stand up. Oh gosh, it’s probably Marge. What is it now? Is the siding too stained? Are the steps crooked? You get up and shuffles down the hall. You open the front door, hiding behind it as you poke your head around. 

Steve has the screen door propped open against his elbow. He holds a tall glass filled with pink, “here. Figured I’d bring this over.” 

“Oh, uh, thanks,” you accept the condensating glass, a wide straw poking out of the whipped cream topped drink. 

“Maybe next time you can pop over too,” he suggests, “I’ve been working on getting the pool going...” he grins, “it’ll be a good summer for it.” 

You nod and look down at the milkshake. 

“Really nice of you,” you say. 

“It’s nothing, sweetie,” he puts his hand on the door above him, looking down at you, “enjoy.” 

“Uh,” you look at him then at the straw. You don’t want to be rude. You put your lips around the tip and take a sip. “Mm, yup, good. Thank you.” 

His blue eyes stick to you and he drags his hand down the door, “I’ll make a deal. You come over to see the pool when it’s ready, and I’ll make you another. How about that, sweetie?” 

You push your lips out. It’s not nice to say no. He didn’t have to bring you the milkshake or invite you. You shrug. 

“Okay,” you agree, “erm, thanks again.” 

He nods and taps the door frame before he steps back. He gently closes the screen door and you watch him through. He turns and strides down the stairs. You shiver as the cold glass numbs your fingers. Hopefully, he forgets about the pool thing. You don't even have a suit.

[theangelsheardyou]

In the mood for some angst? Here's some bsd men x terminally ill reader🩷

Dazai:

• Atsushi notices that everyday, Dazai leaves work early to go...somewhere. it's not like the guy is the type to follow a schedule so he can't tell where exactly he's been going lately. When he asks he just plays it off as a joke, tho he does notice how his gaze seems to be so distant lately.

• turns out, everyday these past few weeks Dazai has been visiting you in the hospital. He always comes with a sweet little gift, nothing extravagant, maybe a flower he knows you like or a cup of coffee from a place you used to frequent.

• he would spend hours with you, just the two of you in that sterilized little hospital room, talking about anything and everything. His demeanor is nonchalant, yet more soft and sensitive to you. He's always had a soft spot for you after all.

• when he learned of your condition he didn't try to "cure" it or "fix" it. He decided that he will love you and stay with you and make you feel like nothing has changed as much as he can. He keeps up with the jokes, the gifts, and tries to make you feel as normal as you used to feel.

• you notice how he stares at you more often, how he looks deeper into your eyes when you talk. As if he's trying to memorize every feature before it all goes away.

• he's decided that once you're gone, is when he will go too. He doesn't want to live without you. He laughs to himself a little bit, a soft, gentle chuckle, at the thought. "It's not the way I would have wanted, but now I finally get to die with you."

• he thinks he's so good at keeping this plan from you. That he's hiding it completely out of your line of sight. But you know Dazai. You know him better than anyone. You know how much he loves you. And the day you part ways your last wish to him is that he continues to live, to move on, to be with his friends and do what he wants to do. And once you're gone, he never thinks of suicide again.

Chuuya:

• at first, he does everything he can to find a cure. He spends thousands on doctors and doctors all specializing in your condition. But they all say the same thing. It can't be cured.

• you notice how much this is eating him up, how he's been more cranky, more irritable, he's never resting. He barely even gives time to visit you at the hospital as he's always on the search for a new doctor who will finally tell him what he wants. That there's a way out of this, a way for you to continue being in his life. But to no avail.

• your request is final, it's the last thing you ask him for. You want him to rest, to give up, and to just enjoy the time you have left. At first he's speechless. His eyes are smaller and wider than you've ever seen them. It feels as though his heart had stopped beating, his blood stopped pumping, and the world just went quiet for a second.

• then there comes the anger. The frustration. How can you just ask him that? To let you go? To just stand by as this stupid illness takes you away? Don't you know how much you mean to him? Don't you care?

• Chuuya doesn't visit you for a while after that. He spends time alone. Not even drinking the wine he loves so much, the bottles he had been saving for a special occasion, the ones with you in it. He stares blankly at nothing, thinking of nothing. The world could end right there and then but he would still be in this state. At least we'd go together, he thinks.

• meanwhile, you remain at the hospital, in the same bed, in the same room. A part of you is happy, because now Chuuya can move on. He can forget about you and finally be happy, happier than he'll ever be with you. You smile at the thought. You used to think that this time would be full of tears. But you were never one to cry. Neither was Chuuya.

• it's sunset. The end of the last month your doctor said you had left. Your body has weakened, you can't even get out of bed. At this point they've stopped trying, stopped filling you with meds and serums and shots. Stopped plugging you into machines and machines and machines. There are no more pipes around your body. No more wires. No more tubes. They've decided to let you go peacefully, and make you feel as if you were sleeping in your own bed, in your own home.

• on the last day, Chuuya is there.

• he stands at the doorway, calm and collected. He enters the room without a word. All he does is sit next to you, and take your hand in his. You look at him and smile.

• "I'm here, doll." He says.

• he wants to apologize. To atone for leaving you alone for so long. For forcing you in this room by yourself. But he knows you hate apologies. He just wants to spend the last remaining moments he has with you, with you.

• as he's sitting on that little chair next to you, watching your breathing get slower and slower, softer and softer, your life force fading away, he examines your face. Your eyes, your nose, your lips. He examines how your hair is fixed into the way you always did it, as if nothing has changed.

• he wants to say something, the last thing you will ever hear.

"I won't forget you,",

"I'll never leave you,"

Something like that. But he doesn't.

Instead he sits and watches you, in complete silence. He only realizes now that you two have been so loud and noisy the whole time you've known each other. Simple conversations are said in such loud voices, but you both loved it that way. But this time, you both decided it would be quiet. Peaceful. A contrast to the unusually loud and vulgar lives you both have lived. An end to a chapter.

Fyodor:

• Like Chuuya, Fyodor isn't one to give up so easily. He goes beyond doctors, or medicine, or anything so ordinary.

• he goes for the Book.

• the one thing that can change anything. All of this. He can give you a better life, one without all the dirt and bloodshed he had associated you with. One where you're happy, living in the house of your dreams, with all the things you've ever wanted, happier than ever.

• a life without him.

• Fyodor loved you too much to watch you get tainted by his own filth. He always thought it was too late for him, but not for you. But now you don't have all that time. Now he has to erase everything. Erase every part of you that was dirtied by him. With a new life free of him, you would finally, truly, be happy.

• He's off on dangerous missions. Making all sorts of enemies. All to do the last thing he could to make you happy.

• "Fedya," you called, your voice as sweet and soft as it always was. He snaps out of his trance, not realizing his gaze was so far away. "Yes, dear?" He answers, hard, sharp eyes softening upon seeing you. "Come here," you ask.

• he stands up from the chair he was sitting on across the room from you, and walks to your bedside. He puts a hand on your pillow, careful not to touch you. He knows very well that your unique condition is not one that is contagious. Even if it was that wouldn't be the reason he isn't touching you. It's all symbolic, he doesn't want to dirty you any more than he already has. He wants to keep this valuable, albeit cracked little porcelain doll in this state, before it slowly disappears.

• "Hold my hand, Fedya." You tell him. Breaking from his symbolic gestures, he takes your hand in his, caressing you with his thumb as he does so.

• "I want you to do something for me," you ask, not meeting his gaze. "Of course, dear." He answers almost immediately. He knows you never ask him for anything unless it was really important.

• "I want you to stop looking for that book." You say. Fyodor's eyes widen a little, a frown almost forming on his face. But he's smart enough to not need a reason. And he knows you well enough to know you don't want a sappy little conversation between the two of you filled with tears and cries.

• It takes a moment, but he smiles and nods. "Okay," he says. "Anything for you, myshka."

• your final moments are spent with him telling you a story, reading from a book you used to love. It was in Russian, and he would read it to you as a pastime before going to bed together. Even after you're gone, he keeps reading. All the way until he finishes the book. He closes it and looks at you. Your eyes are closed, your mouth is slightly open, as if you were just asleep. He gets up and kisses you on the forehead, and doesn't leave until the doctors come in.

Ok that's all! And sorry but usually when I say "bsd men" I mean these three idiots who I love with my whole heart and my whole pussy🤗 also sorry if some were kinda out of character, especially fyodor, I haven't seen him much in the anime yet since I haven't gotten to s5😅

[wambsgansshoelaces]

omg a headcanon like the one you did for tom but for roman snd stewy? the period one i mean !! also gender neutral pls :>

thank you for requesting anon, i love u!!! enjoy xx

really craving pizza bianca rn

on your period (roman + stewy)

Roman

ᝰ has no idea what he’s doing

ᝰ he calls your period a full stop because ‘they’re synonyms lol’ (as his text said)

ᝰ just wants you happy

ᝰ so whenever you’re on your period he just

ᝰ does things for you??

ᝰ makes you breakfast in bed, attempts to pack you a lunch, botches dinner

ᝰ he’s trying at least

ᝰ he usually just settles for buying you whatever you’re craving and letting you lay your head in his lap

ᝰ he strokes your hair, your face, your neck, your back

ᝰ he makes sure you’re feeling good

ᝰ lots of chocolate all the time

ᝰ just so that he can eat it with you

ᝰ if you ever ruin any pants or clothing or even furniture, he replaces it without you knowing

ᝰ “didn’t i throw this pair of pants out last week?” you ask him one time

ᝰ “i got you a new one, don’t worry about it.”

ᝰ if you suffer with cramps or any sort of chronic illness regarding your reproductive health, he’s always quietly concerned

ᝰ “you sure it doesn’t hurt? you should tell me if it hurts.”

ᝰ keeps track of how long in between painkillers your pain returns

ᝰ makes you try a bunch of homemade remedies he googled

ᝰ the first time you go on your period while you’re living together, he goes out and buys you a heating pad, a weighted blanket, and a heated blanking thing all at once

ᝰ if you use pads or tampons, he gets really confused when out trying to buy some for you

ᝰ but he’s too embarrassed to ask

ᝰ so when you’re taking a nap he scuttles into the bathroom and takes a picture that he keeps on his phone

ᝰ and then gets the exact ones when he notices you’re running out or you ask him

ᝰ this man bullies the doctors that don’t listen to you

ᝰ like he is well known with the endocrinologists and gynecologists in the are as a nusiance

ᝰ and lowkey an asshole

ᝰ but it’s all ‘in your honor’ as he says

ᝰ “if they say they’re cramping, they’re cramping. aren’t you supposed to be helpful? how the fuck do you have a medical license?”

ᝰ has gotten kicked out of the appointment many a time

ᝰ but he always waits patiently for you outside

ᝰ and calls corporate like the diva he is

ᝰ has the means to get you the best care

ᝰ and he does get you it

ᝰ “you literally deserve so much more than i can give you. you’re my everything, remember?”

ᝰ “i love you, ro.”

ᝰ “fuck off with that sappy shit…. i love you more.”

Stewy

ᝰ knows enough about periods to be able to help you

ᝰ like he’s knowledgeable enough to cook things he knows your body is in need of during your period of ovulation

ᝰ urges you to work out specifically on your period

ᝰ “it helps clear your head,” he says

ᝰ but if you’re not up to it, he won’t make you

ᝰ maybe just a small walk around outside and he’ll let you just nap

ᝰ but if you even don’t even want to walk, he thinks you’re dying

ᝰ and showers you in affection

ᝰ which he does anyway even if he thinks you’re fine??

ᝰ he’s just dramatic

ᝰ he’s an awfully good cook

ᝰ he loves cooking

ᝰ especially for you

ᝰ he specifically makes you pho for dinner every first day of your period

ᝰ “it clears your sinuses, babe,” he says every single time

ᝰ it does, really

ᝰ he’s really big about the two of you sitting down at the table for meals

ᝰ but if you’re unable because of your period, it’s fine with him

ᝰ he bought one of those breakfast in bed trays just for those moments

ᝰ if you struggle with bad cramps or reproductive illness, he’s with you at every single appointment

ᝰ sometimes he even sits next to you on the patient bed

ᝰ he just likes swinging his legs over the side

ᝰ he scrambles off whenever the doctor comes in

ᝰ he’s so subtly evil with bad doctors

ᝰ “oh, i understand it’s your professional opinion, but i also understand this clinic operates solely on donations? huh, and i think those guys whose names are on plaques all over the place are my buddies! you know jeff? i know jeff!”

ᝰ holds your hand through everything

ᝰ pain, ultrasounds, examinations

ᝰ you’re both walking back to the car from a normal check up and he’s swinging your hands back and forth with his

ᝰ “you know, i’ll help you with anything you ask me to.”

ᝰ “thank you, stew. you’re sweet.”

ᝰ “i love you.”

[chorusofkhonshu]

Noone was going to die.

Mostly I made this because I guess people on some platforms were saying Noone was wrong for going with the Ferryman or that she should have stayed with Otto. So I guess I made this to inform that, no, she could not have stayed with Otto. Well she could have, maybe, but she would have died shortly after. She made the best possible choice to survive when she didn't know it at the time, and here's why. In the first episode she is already ill, she survived the water sickness but still has these lingering headaches. We even get told that the flower that she got from her parents died that morning as well. Get to that soon. Following the first episode Noone's condition slowly deteriorates more and more. The headaches get stronger, she starts to scratch behind her ear. The EEG machines hurt her head as well, she doesn't like the way they feel, a burning sensation in her head growing stronger and stronger. Then along comes episode 4 where near the end of the episode she starts to react violently to whatever happened to her at the end of the nightmare. Episode 5, back to that flower I mentioned earlier. Otto gets her an exact replacement to the one her parents got her. This is where we find out what kind of flower was given to her by her parents. That flower being a Chrysanthemum. In different parts of the world these flowers have many different meanings depending on their color. However it seems to be in Europe for the most part that these flowers are for gravesides or mourning the dead regardless of color. If this wasn't important they wouldn't have bothered mentioning the type of flower. Finally the last episode. There is a time jump of 2 or 3 days. Otto says so. Noone vanished again, this time a whole night, reappearing at sunrise in the south wing of the institute. She was then confined for two days. When Otto goes to see her, I can only assume she is in a haggard state because A. her illness has progress further and B. While she is scared to sleep, she still wants to and has presumably been trying to sleep, she says the nurse keeps interrupting her, the fire in her head hurting now more than ever. She's been kept awake for two days and nights, not allowed to sleep. Her stomach is also hurting yet Otto forces her to eat the sleep inducing candy. He does not want to wait for her to sleep and needs her to be in a deep sleep. You know the rest, she goes to Nowhere. My conclusion? Everyone one knew she was going to die. Her parents, probably other doctors before coming to Otto, he's a psychologist I guess so it makes sense for him not to find out until he sent her up for radiology. This is why her parents come to see her even once! They are bad parents, this is why her disappearance will be swept under the rug. Everyone expects her to die! They used to live in a crappy apartment but moved into a rich house, probably because of money they got when Noone was pronounced a survivor of the "water sickness" as she was paraded around on television to show the world there is a cure. How do you think that would look if the kid you paraded around as cured just up and died? That the cure was a lie? If the water sickness is a huge pandemic if could even be the case that the government is involved, silencing everything to prevent the truth that no cure exists. Her going to Nowhere was the only choice she had. I don't think Otto knew she was dying, mostly because he is blinded by the pursuit of the Ferryman. But this was her only chance to continue living. Listen, if it was me and I had the choice between staying in our world and going to Nowhere, I'd stay here. Now if I'm dying? You best believe I'm taking my chances in Nowhere.

[kurithedweeb]

An idea I had last night: Jacob survives.

So, instead of the amulet just making everyone drop dead, we're going with the curse being a plague. (Thank you @irenes-journal for turning the plague amulet idea into what it is today.)

In canon, the amulet kills everyone save the person holding it, so the plague amulet would theoretically grant one person immunity, or at least resistance. How it grants some kind of immunity/resistance is by releasing antibodies for the plague, slowly at first to acclimatize the body a bit before it floods the system, and Jacob got some of the antibodies before he gave it to Aaron.

He was the first to fall ill, and he took twice as long to succumb to the illness than anyone else infected did. The town doctor died before Jacob did, so when he fell into a coma that looked a whole lot like death, he was mistaken for dead.

Lily was barely holding on herself at this point, and Aaron came back from burying the day's dead to find his wife and son dead in Jacob's room. Lily worshipped Menphia and some minor gods, being from Tu'la, and raised Jacob to do the same since Aaron's side of the family doesn't worship any recognized religion (Ultima stuff is for later), and there was a small tomb previously made for when Lily and her children died according to Tu'lan burial practices. Which gives Jacob some more time than he'd have in a grave to get out before he runs out of air.

Aaron goes on burying bodies and surveying the sick while he mourns his own family's loss. Jacob wakes up maybe a day or two later in the dark with what remains of Lily. Obviously, he freaks out, crying out for help, and no one comes. Fueled by adrenalin and fear, he manages to open the tomb door just enough for him to squeeze through, and he finds the streets covered in graves. He has no idea what's going on, no clue how long it's been, but he runs home and his dad's not there and all the streets he's run down are empty and stinking of rot. He needs his dad to not be dead, so he comes up with this idea that obviously Aaron thought he was dead like everyone else and left.

And so Jacob packs a bag and sets out to leave Falconclaw, and he leaves barely an hour before Aaron gets home. They just miss each other.

Jacob isn't well. He collapses on the road and wakes up in a merchant caravan bound for some village way North. He asks if any of them have seen his father, says he's the son of the Lord of Falconclaw, and one of the mercenaries hired to guard the caravan sees an opportunity. By the time the caravan reaches its destination, Aaron is already in O'khasis being groomed by Zane to become a Juror.

Jacob is snatched off the street by the same mercenaries who were guarding the caravan and sold to someone visiting from Tu'la, and he winds up a servant boy for one of the king's vassal clans. Maybe Nana's, maybe the one his mother escaped from. The plague left him incredibly scarred, so for a long time he's a faceless, bandaged figure in the shadows of the house, all this anger and frustration building up inside him at not being able to figure out a way home, until one day the master of the house thinks it'd be funny to match a servant boy against one of his soldier-apprentices.

And Jacob wins. No training, having thrown away his weapon and beaten the other boy with his bare hands until they were dripping in blood. He's sent to the gladiator pits, maybe the same ones Liochant grew up in, and as long as he has his anger he dominates. His contract is bought by some wealthy noble with a penchant for collecting pretty, broken things, and on the road he kills them and flees into the night.

By the time he gets back to O'khasis, Aaron's time on the Jury is over and he's disappeared completely, having forsaken his own name and become The Stranger. This is when Jacob finally hears about, finally confirms, the fall of Falconclaw. He goes to Zianna, waiting for her to be out in town before he approaches her. She and his mother considered themselves sisters, once, and Zianna had been an excellent spy in Tu'la, if anyone would help him it'd be her. All Zianna has to give him is rumors, but anything is better than nothing.

He takes it, he thanks her, he goes on the road trying to find his father, and gets waylaid a bunch on the way by saving people and taking out the mercenary company that sold him to that Tu'lan visitor and into years of servitude and gladiator rings. He had a number of names in Tu'la, but he goes back to the name from a lifetime ago, introducing himself everywhere he goes as Jacob Lycan, son of Aaron Lycan, last Lord of Falconclaw, in an effort to see if his father will be drawn to the man using his son's name. By the time he makes it all the way around to Phoenix Drop, it's the middle of the Irene Dimension time skip, and since no one knew who The Stranger was or ever really saw his face, they don't realize that that's exactly who Jacob is looking for.

He goes back to Falconclaw, thinking maybe he can find some clues where this all started. It's practically the same as he left it since everyone thinks the land is extremely cursed, and in looking through their home he finds books on the teaching of his father's faith. He fits his father's old clothes, his old faith. He takes whatever he cares to keep from the Lycan estate and visits Lily's tomb before he leaves, and not a day later he comes across Abby, who's taken to the road hoping to find a lead on the woman she believes killed her father, Lady Katelyn the Firefist, who disappeared without a trace years ago about the same time High Priest Zane Ro'Meave and a few other Jurors did. She and Jacob agree to help each other and become good friends, and eventually they round back to Phoenix Drop.

A week after Aaron died.

Jacob introduces Abby first, notes that the Lord, or maybe she's the Lord's mother, seems to know who Abby is, and then he introduces himself. As Jacob Lycan, son of Aaron Lycan, last Lord of Falconclaw. And the look on this Lord's face is indescribable. She asks to speak with Jacob alone.

She tells him about his father in the last part of his life. She tells him how he saved her several times, taught her to fight, saved her guards, those two over there. That one he sacrificed himself for just last week, when he saved the man from another realm and finally got vengeance for his family and village. How he once said that when his journey was done, when he had taken the life of the man who cursed them all, he would finally be at peace with his wife and son.

Then there's a child's cry, and suddenly Jacob is being introduced to two little girls who his father helped raise. To his sisters.

He can't even process it properly before he hears Abby scream, and suddenly he is running to pull her off a blue-haired woman and holding her, thrashing and spitting vitriol, yelling how she thought of Katelyn like her mother, as Katelyn explains what really happened that day, and everything Abby has been keeping inside her for years spills out in wave after wave of tears. She clings to Jacob, and he finds himself crying too. If only they had known the truth earlier.

If they'd only learned the truth earlier, Abby wouldn't have spent so long hating an innocent woman she once adored, and Jacob could have seen his father again. Maybe if he'd known Aaron was The Stranger, if he'd known to wait in Phoenix Drop, Aaron would be alive. He would have had his son to live for.

They can't make themselves stay there once they know the truth. They're not ready. Abby tells Katelyn she'll be back to catch up later, and Jacob tells the Lord he'd like to meet his sisters another time, and with Jacob's quest over they go to hunt the Jury of Nine for Jeffory Goldenheart.

[invisibleicewands]

When Good Omens wrapped its first season, the story was over. That was it, the Amazon Prime TV series created by Neil Gaiman had finished adapting Gaiman and Terry Pratchett’s 1990 apocalyptic comedy novel. But Gaiman wasn’t quite finished with the tale of the angel Aziraphale (Michael Sheen) and the demon Crowley (David Tennant).

“We always knew from the beginning that there was more story because Neil and Terry, when Terry was alive, had talked about ideas beyond the first book,” Sheen tells Inverse.

In fact, some of those ideas made it into the first season of Good Omens, which aired on Amazon Prime in 2020 to widespread acclaim. With new characters like the archangel Gabriel (Jon Hamm), and scenes showing further insight into the millennia-long relationship between Aziraphale and Crowley, Gaiman was planting the seeds for the second season of Good Omens. That wasa gamble, considering Season 2 didn’t get greenlit until 2023. Even then, Sheen and Tennant weren’t even sure if Good Omens Season 2 was happening until they showed up to set the first day.

“Until you’re on set on day one, you don’t really believe it’ll happen,” Sheen says.

Nearly five years after they filmed Season 1, Sheen and Tennant settled back into their characters as if they’d been doing this for, well, millennia. With the apocalypse out of the way, Good Omens Season 2 is very much the Aziraphale and Crowley show, dedicating lengthy flashbacks to their friendship (or maybe more) through the ages. The chemistry between the two can be credited to Sheen and Tennant’s close real-life friendship, with the pair even poking fun at their relationship in a comedy series called Staged that aired during COVID. But the Aziraphale and Crowley relationship took off in a way they couldn’t anticipate after the first season, and which Sheen and Tennant felt some pressure to live up to.

“Gradually, I’d start meeting people dressed up as Aziraphale and Crowley,” Tennant tells Inverse. “And then that would happen more and more and more, and you realize, oh, this has got legs.”

Inverse spoke to Sheen and Tennant about Good Omens Season 2, how they dealt with the show’s passionate following, and what Easter eggs fans can expect to see.

Knowing the first season of Good Omens finished adapting the book, what was your reaction when you were asked to be in the second season?

Michael Sheen: Well, there was no real clear point where it was put to us. We always knew from the beginning that there was more story because Neil and Terry, when Terry was alive, had talked about ideas beyond the book. And in fact, some of those ideas are in the first series. The angels and Gabriel are not in the book. So we knew there was more story. And then as the series came out and it got the reception it got and the audience seemed to enjoy it so much, it was clear that there was possibly an appetite for more. And I think because Neil had talked it through with Terry in the past, about where the story could go, that gave him the confidence to feel like maybe we could explore this. And then it just developed.

David Tennant: Yes. But it crept up on us, didn’t it? It evolved as an idea, and it went from being something that, oh, wouldn’t it be nice if, to a genuine exploration of a possibility of Series 2, to when can we do it?

Sheen: Until you’re on set on day one, you don’t really believe it’ll happen. And then when I did turn up on day one—

Tennant: I wasn’t there.

Sheen: Because he was ill.

Tennant: I got COVID for the first couple of days of the shoot. Remember that was a thing? Everyone stayed off work and everything.

Sheen: Well, you did. Some of us battled on.

Obviously, both of you were in Doctor Who. I saw the handful of Doctor Who references in this season, with Aziraphale haggling over a lost episode of Doctor Who, Peter Davison playing Job, and David, your reference to Alpha Centauri. Whose idea was it to sprinkle in those Doctor Who nods? And were more that didn’t make it in?

Tennant: That’s Neil [Gaiman], isn’t it? Neil’s a fan, and Douglas [Mackinnon], our director as well, who’s worked on Doctor Who, so there are a few overlaps. But there are lots of, not just Doctor Who, there are lots of references to all sorts of things that are sprinkled in there.

Sheen: For film and TV buffs, there are so many little Easter eggs. There’s not a scene that there isn’t something going on in there.

Tennant: Yes. Some of them are very explicit, others you have to really search for, and lots I still don’t understand. But there’s a lot going on in there and there’s a lot of hidden content.

Sheen: Yeah. Because the episode of Doctor Who that I did was written by Neil. That was the connection.

A fantastic episode.

Sheen: Some say the best episode.

Tennant: Eh, there were better ones. I don’t know.

The relationship between Aziraphale and Crowley was a major part of what made Season 1 work so well, and I was overjoyed to see Season 2 doubled down on that. They’re obviously close in the book, but it was your chemistry in the show that made fans really embrace them as ineffable husbands. Did the glowing reception for the Aziraphale-Crowley ship influence Season 2’s direction? And how aware were you of the immediate fan reception to your characters together?

Sheen: Well it was quite overwhelming, really. When the first series came out, I’d never experienced anything like it before. I suppose David, having gone through the whole Doctor Who experience, had experienced some kind of passionate fan base now.

Tennant: Yes, yes. Particular shows like this that have that kind of enthusiastic following, it is quite overwhelming. But it’s lovely. It’s very humbling to be in the midst of that. And Good Omens, I don’t know that I was immediately aware of it, but then gradually I’d start meeting people dressed up as Aziraphale and Crowley. And then that would happen more and more and more, and you realize, oh, this has got legs. This has grabbed a level of adoration and love that is really lovely. It’s a real privilege to be connected to because it goes well beyond anything that we do. It becomes its own thing, and that’s lovely.

Sheen: There’s a lot of incredibly creative and talented people out there watching this show. And then putting that creativity and talent into writing fanfiction or doing fanart or making things, I’ve seen the most extraordinary things that people have made based on this show. And it’s amazing to have that and to know that people care about the story and these characters so much. And we carry that responsibility into the show, and take it very seriously, the way people have responded to this, just seeing how people have created their own communities based on it and formed incredible friendships and meaningful relationships as a result of it. It really is a privilege. It’s very humbling to witness that.

[lastoneout]

Hey uh @ people with ME/CFS I got a question...

Everything I've read and heard about kinda seems to go hard on the idea that over-exerting yourself tends to lead to exhaustion that just never gets better at all no matter how long you rest after, and like I always assumed I didn't have it, because yeah overexerting myself tends to make me way more exhausted than is does other people and the exhaustion lasts like, a week or more sometimes, but it does eventually get better.

Like last weekend I went shopping for my birthday and also to an art gallery, and then I did a few small errands, and I conserved my energy as best I could, resting often, using mobility aids, ect, but I had to spend Mon-Fri in bed doing basically nothing aside from watching youtube, listening to music, and playing tetris because that was all I had the physical and mental energy to do. And granted that was dragged out a little because I had to go to the ER on Wednesday due to a migraine that got triggered by all this(bcs overexerting myself almost always triggers a migraine) and on Tuesday I sat in the car while we took my cat to the vet for a quick nail trim, but aside from that I just rested and even though I am feeling a bit better today I'm still just SO fucking tired and I know I'm going to have to take it easy for a few days more just to be sure I'm okay.

Which like, idk doesn't sound normal, that's for fucking sure, but I do know that with enough rest eventually I will return to my normal, which isn't everyone else's normal but is still normal enough that I can make myself easy meals and sit at my desk and talk to people and make phone calls and run errands without it killing me too badly.

But like idk my doctors seem convinced that I don't have any kind of autoimmune condition(although they haven't actually ran any tests they just keep insisting I'm not showing the signs of one and to keep up with physical therapy even when I tell them that just going clothes shopping for a few hours puts me on bedrest for the next 2-3 days) but idk again this does NOT seem normal. I legit feel SICK sometimes when I push myself too hard, like I think I'm coming down with a cold or something but it never actually turns into one, I just have that "eugh" sick feeling for a day or two and then it goes away once I've rested enough(also for clarification I never get any real cold/illness symptoms like a temperature and I mask literally everywhere and this ONLY happens after exertion so I don't think I'm actually getting sick). I also don't usually feel rested when I sleep but I always chalked that up to the insomnia more than anything?? But it does happen even when I have a good night's sleep with no tossing and turning or nightmares...

Anyway if anyone who does have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome could maybe explain to me what it's like for them I would appreciate it because idk what else could possibly be going on with me but I am so fucking tired of my doctors acting like there is nothing wrong. It might not be ME/CFS, and I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia so maybe this is all just that? So I also wouldn't mind if someone who has fibro can tell me if this is all just fibro stuff. But idk I just want to know for sure, you know? (If it helps in addition to the fibro I also have arthritis, hEDS, orthostatic Intollerance, and occipital neuralgia.)

[vickyvicarious]

I didn't realize until re reading the Whitby section now... Mina sees the bite marks, and she concludes she is the cause, that she did this with her hairpin. But this definitely won't be the last time that she will blame herself about a misfortune on Lucy and even om herself.

Yeah... in fact, Lucy's first movements when Mina arrived were focused on her bite marks. She instinctively hid them even before waking up, but though Mina noticed it, she interpreted the motion as just due to being cold. Then when Lucy is a bit calmer and reaches to her throat again, Mina goes straight to assuming her clumsiness with the pin was the reason.

As I came close, she put up her hand in her sleep and pulled the collar of her nightdress close around her throat. Whilst she did so there came a little shudder through her, as though she felt the cold. [...] I feared to wake her all at once, so, in order to have my hands free that I might help her, I fastened the shawl at her throat with a big safety-pin; but I must have been clumsy in my anxiety and pinched or pricked her with it, for by-and-by, when her breathing became quieter, she put her hand to her throat again and moaned.

Later on that day, when she actually sees the marks, Mina is firmly set in the opinion that it was her doing, and she feels quite guilty and concerned already:

I was sorry to notice that my clumsiness with the safety-pin hurt her. Indeed, it might have been serious, for the skin of her throat was pierced. I must have pinched up a piece of loose skin and have transfixed it, for there are two little red points like pin-pricks, and on the band of her nightdress was a drop of blood. When I apologised and was concerned about it, she laughed and petted me, and said she did not even feel it. Fortunately it cannot leave a scar, as it is so tiny.

So, of course, when she sees them a week later (the above was August 11, below is the 17th) she feels all the worse about it:

I trust her feeling ill may not be from that unlucky prick of the safety-pin. I looked at her throat just now as she lay asleep, and the tiny wounds seem not to have healed. They are still open, and, if anything, larger than before, and the edges of them are faintly white. They are like little white dots with red centres. Unless they heal within a day or two, I shall insist on the doctor seeing about them.

Mina is only able to look at the marks again when Lucy is already asleep. It's possible Lucy is consciously hiding them from her because she knows Mina is feeling really guilty about it. But more likely, she's obeying the same impulse that drove her to hide them in the first place, when Mina had just reached her. It's Dracula's influence compelling her to hide the evidence.

But that's about Lucy, your ask was about Mina's guilt. And it does kill me a little to see just how quickly she assumes the responsibility for this injury, and how much it weighs on her. The fact that she sneaked a peek at Lucy's throat while she was asleep is telling in that regard: her "clumsiness" has been on her mind, she's been wanting to check in on the progress of the injury. And when she sees it looks worse than before, she feels awful. She tells herself that surely Lucy's illness isn't due to this... but obviously is just trying to quiet her own fears on that very point, and her resolve to call a doctor in to look at them proves she doesn't fully believe there is no relation. Part of that is just her thinking logically. After all, Lucy didn't seem otherwise injured after her nighttime walk, so what else could be the cause of this sudden new change in her health? The sleepwalking has been ongoing and getting gradually worse, but surely can't explain all of her symptoms, such as being so pale or gasping for air. Maybe the injury got infected somehow.

Mina likes to take action about things, and assumes a lot of responsibility on her own. But she's also entrusted with a lot of secrets/responsibilities from others, and it can be very difficult to deal with (especially when their requests all restrict the action she is able to take*). Her reaction always seems to finding fault with herself for not being able to take the right actions or deal with everything that's been piled up on her. She has a very understanding attitude about anyone else being incapable of doing stuff, whether from health or trauma or whatever else, but that grace doesn't extend to herself. It's pretty brutal to watch, especially when you know where it leads. It ties in really closely to her need to make all her actions serve a useful purpose, too. She doesn't get to just relax and enjoy things for no reason, she doesn't get to not be responsible for failing to notice and protect her loved ones from everything, she doesn't get to be forgiven for any transgressions, even ones forced upon her. Everyone else can, but not her. Why? ....Because she just doesn't.

It's not logical or reasonable, but her impulse is to assume responsibility for everything. Even things that happen to her. Even things that just happen around her, and that she did all she possibly could have done or could have known to have done. It's kinda heartbreaking. I'm very thankful that the people around her love and admire her so totally because she's not really providing it to herself.

*Mrs. Westenra requesting her to keep the secret about her health and Lucy's sleepwalking (while Mina still has to try and restrict the sleepwalking), Lucy refusing to let Mina tell anyone about her terrible experience (though Mina had to first rescue her and then ensure it doesn't happen again), Sister Agatha warning her not to let Jonathan experience any excitement (while Mina will have to care for him)... and that's just so far. And it's all well-meant, and in some cases circumstances make it difficult to do otherwise, but she needs to be able to act and be trusted with matters... without being left entirely alone to deal with them.

[look-a-yandere-fandom-blog]

I would like something (hcs or else, whatever you can make out of it/feel like writing) for Dr. Stockill and a darling who is not eating.

Eiter because they decided to hunger strike as a form of protesting against him (totally terrible idea but not every darling is the sharpest tool in the shed heheh...) or because they are sick and that makes it hard for them/takes away apetite.

Hunger Pains | Headcanons

Dr. Stockill / Gender Neutral Reader

Fandom: The Asylum for Wayward Victorian Girls.

No Spoilers.

_________________________________

Ambiguous yan - can be read as platonic or romantic.

_________________________________

Content Warning: Hunger strikes, disordered eating, illness, brief mention of force feeding, brief mentions of animal/human death.

(If there’s anything else I need to add to these warnings, please let me know.)

Tysm for the ask anon! <3 I hope that this lives up to your request/expectations!!

_________________________________

- It doesn’t take Stockill long to notice they’ve stopped eating.

- In the months, maybe years, that Stockill has known them, they have never displayed an avoidance of food to this degree.

- Despite his detachment, disgust, and apathy to almost everything around him, he is an observant man. Especially when it comes to his darling.

- Within a few days, the interrogations start.

- He begins questioning his darling; and the longer he goes without an answer, the more insistent he becomes...

- "Don't lie to me, I know something is wrong with you."

- Once he finally manages to get an explanation out of them, he's bewildered.

- This odd behaviour is out of spite? Some silly protest against him?

- Stockill believes that he treats his darling rather well, at least in comparison to the other inmates he oversees.

- His darling is given decent food and drink; dressed in clothes that keep out the asylum's chilling cold; and is kept close to the doctor whenever possible.

- Stockill even allows them to rest in the safety of his room, in his own bed (which is often unused due to his frequent neglect of sleep).

- And yet, they still fight him?

- They would prefer the bleak darkness of the asylum's wards, accompanied by nothing but filthy rats and those wretched whores, over staying with him?

- Even going so far as to starve themselves, just to prove a point?

- His darling begins to deteriorate... day by day. Their movements becoming slower, their thoughts foggier, their gaze more distant. All despite his attempts to reason with them.

- As he tries to rationalise it, his confusion gives way to anger.

- Convinced that his darling's behaviour must have been instigated by another, threats soon follow.

- "I swear, if you do not stop this idiotic demonstration... I will find whichever inmate placed the idea in your head, and I will make her suffer!"

- From here, there's only two ways that it can end:

- In one, his darling ceases their little hunger strike, giving into the doctor's demands. Whereupon things will return to how they were, and Stockill will limit their contact with others even more as a precaution.

- In the other ending, his darling continues. Until Stockill does something...

- Drastic.

- But, he would rather not resort to something as vile as force feeding, or harming their companions to threaten them into relenting...

- So, it would be wise for his darling to stop. After all, they don't want to have their friends' blood on their hands... do they?

_________________________________

- Alternatively, if his darling’s lack of appetite is a result of sickness or some other affliction, he’s more…

- Well, he's not exactly sympathetic, but perhaps more understanding.

- Now, this is a problem for him to solve, a condition to be alleviated.

- He quickly sets himself to work: to find a cure for whatever is ailing them.

- There's a sudden influx of dead rats (and eventually dead patients) scattered throughout his laboratory, all in his attempt to cure this illness.

- But, with the limitations of victorian medicine, there's a good chance that Stockill's ventures will remain fruitless.

- If the illness becomes long-term, or is in fact some incurable/chronic condition, then Stockill will continue to seek for ways to lessen it.

- All the while, he will focus on keeping his darling healthy; maybe even neglecting his plague research until he is confident that their condition is stable.

- They won't be leaving Stockill's room for a long while... As he will insist they remain bedbound to avoid the affliction worsening.

- He would try to encourage his darling's appetite with more pleasant food than the asylum typically provides.

- "I recall you mentioning this dish. Something you enjoyed before you were sent... here."

- The costs for which are taken from the asylum's funds... but that is of no matter to him. His darling takes upmost priority.

- "Also, don't attempt to smuggle some to the other patients again. Yes, yes, I saw that. You are not nearly as sly as you think you are."

- He's almost considerate in this state.

- It's eerie.

- Incredibly eerie.

- But, all things considered, it's far from the worst situation his darling could be in.

- And as they fall asleep, curled up in Stockill's bed, the doctor watching them with a hawk-like gaze...

- They see the ever so faint, ever so unnatural, twist of his lips.

- A smile.

- "I will see you tomorrow, my dear..."

_________________________________

[diningwiththeasquiths]

Kinktober Day 2: Mutual Masturbation

Words: 1074

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Daniel x Armand

Summary: Daniel thinks about “Rashid” a little too much and a little too deep.

“Your doctor in New York was consulted and has given consent. You’ll find a note from him in your electronic mailbox.”

Unusual wording aside, Rashid’s manner of speaking also caught Daniel’s attention. Its haughty inflection sticks with him throughout the day, still running through his mind as he gets ready for bed that night, brushing his teeth and staring at his own tired features in the large, light-rimmed mirror. The way Rashid talks to him leaves barely any room for argument. Daniel hasn’t been shut down like that since before his last divorce. It’s kind of hot.

Nope. 

He’s not doing this. Not even, especially not, in the false privacy of his own perfectly climate-controlled guest bedroom. 

After stripping down to his boxer shorts and putting on a T-shirt—so old it might precede Rashid, but nice and soft with only a few small holes in it—he gets into bed and attempts to find a comfortable sleeping position, plagued with the knowledge that he’ll wake up at least twice in order to use the bathroom. Despite it having been another long and draining day, his thoughts are not ready to quiet down yet. 

“We suggest you begin on the left.”

Only Rashid hadn’t been suggesting. The tone of his voice had made it very clear that he was ordering Daniel. His dick gives an interested twitch at the recollection.  

Huh. 

Well, shit. 

There’s something about the combination of Rashid’s pretty yet dispassionate face and the austerity of his words. Like he considers Daniel to be far, far beneath him. On one end of the spectrum there is Louis, the God, and on the other end there’s Daniel, the filth underneath Rashid’s shoe. 

He’s nearing half-mast now. Jesus Christ. There’s no way he’s going to give in to this, this unexpected and extremely ill-timed bout of horniness. Tell that to his overactive brain though. Something about a gift and a curse. 

What would it be like, with Rashid? He’d boss Daniel around in the bedroom for sure. Tell him what to do, what position to fold his aching body in, impassive eyes watching him struggle to comply, soft-spoken words dripping with thinly veiled venom.

Would Rashid touch him at all? Maybe even demand Daniel to pleasure him? Or would he avoid any physical contact between them and make Daniel touch himself, put on a pathetic little show for him? 

Ah, but that’s where the gloves come in. 

The thought of sterile black latex on his bare skin makes Daniel’s breath hitch. The same two-word thought that made him book that ticket to Dubai International Airport flashes through his mind.

Fuck it.

What’s the point of resisting his high-risk urges when his days are numbered no matter what? Might as well live a little while he still can. Consequences be damned. 

Throwing the sheets back, he raises his hips off the mattress and tugs his underwear down just far enough to expose himself. It’s been a long while since he’s been in the mood for self-gratification. The uncomfortable dryness of his hand only feeds the fantasy he’s got going on in his head, so he doesn’t bother with spit. Slowly but surely he gets himself as hard as he can get these days. 

In his mind’s eye, Rashid stands next to his bed fully clothed, just a titillating peak of his chest visible. His latex-covered hand moves clinically over Daniel’s cock. His gaze is detached– No, he’s not even looking at Daniel, the ever-present iPad in his other hand holds his full attention. Daniel lets out a soft groan, needing it faster but also feeling the near-painful friction of rubber against sensitive nerve endings. Rashid pays him no mind. The pace of his hand remains unchanged, methodical, almost machine-like. He goes through the motions absent-mindedly, like getting Daniel off is the same to him as making a cup of coffee.  

His dick is becoming more sore by the minute, almost too sore to keep fueling his arousal, forcing Daniel to switch it up and move things along. He keeps the same pace, but fantasy-Rashid finally shifts his attention from his screen to Daniel. The neutral look on his face doesn’t budge. The words he speaks might be encouraging, but his delivery is as cool and professional as always. Like the way Daniel is falling apart in front of him—because of him—doesn’t affect him at all. He sounds almost patronizing, especially with that accent of his. 

“That’s it Mr. Molloy. It won’t be long now, will it? Go ahead, make a mess of yourself. That’s it. Good boy.”

Yeah, that'll do it.

Huffing through gritted teeth, Daniel rubs himself through his orgasm. The toe-curling friction on his cock has crossed into something actually painful, but intense ripples of pleasure cancel it out. As soon as those dwindle he has to stop touching himself. It feels like he rubbed himself raw. The tremor in his right hand makes itself known again with a vengeance. Catching his breath a little, he regains the ability to think clearly enough to berate himself for the lack of self-control, praying that Louis did not pick up on any of that. 

There’s nothing he wants more than to take his underwear off completely, use it to clean himself up as best as he can, throw it on the floor, get back under the covers, turn over onto his stomach and drift off to sleep. So fuck it, that’s exactly what he does.

Some distance away, in the large open space of the master bedroom, Armand wipes himself down, his movements sluggish but meticulous. The giddiness of what has just transpired is quickly fading. It was reckless of him to listen in to Daniel’s thoughts and get carried away like that. He knows Louis is currently fully preoccupied with all the horrible things the interview is stirring up, and yet… this cannot happen again. 

He does make a mental note to integrate the remark “that’s it, Mr. Molloy” into one of his interactions with Daniel tomorrow, should the opportunity present itself. The little thrill he gets out of rattling Daniel is too good to pass up on, and he sees no reason to deny himself the delight of watching the other man squirm. 

Picking up his iPad, he scrolls through enough art auctions that the fluttery feeling in the center of him—something he has long since come to associate with Daniel—eventually fades into the background. 

[angelsanarchy]

Glass Houses: Jack Thurlow x Y/N Series CH 05 -> CH 06

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" "I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet."

Tagging: @roryculkinluvr @thatsthewrongwallcraig @icarus-star @cc-luvr @madamemaximoff06 @shady-the-simp @quicksilversg1rl

"How is your sleep? Is it leveling out or are you still experiencing fatigue?" Jack stretched out in front of the computer screen and yawned.

"It's still weird. Some days I'm too exhausted to function. Other days I work my ass off to clear out the house but when I finally lay down, I just can't shut my mind off." Jack explained.

"What goes through your mind when you find yourself unable to sleep?" Jack rolled his eyes.

"Everything...nothing at all...I think about what I might do the next day or working on the book but then I'm too exhausted to even sit in the chair." Jack was growing annoyed with how his meds made him like a zombie. His brain was far too developed to not be able to use it during the day time.

"How about your appetite? Are you eating regularly?" Jack hated having to explain that he was miserable because his body required these meds to stay sane.

"Not as often as I should. Most of that is because I haven't done the grocery shopping yet. I have to put in an order." Jack listened to the hum come from the doctor.

"Have you thought about maybe going to the grocery store? Getting out among the people just to explore." Jack laughed.

"Yeah I'm not sure I have the energy for that. Maybe if I go late at night but I don't want to mingle just yet." Jack couldn't imagine having to walk through the grocery store having people stare at him or offer condolences that are empty and way too late. He wouldn't mind running into Y/n but that's a different story.

"Didn't you say you had already befriended your neighbors daughter?" Dr. Carty questioned making notes.

"I'd hardly call us friends. She doesn't know I'm crazy yet." Jack explained with a self deprecating laugh.

"You aren't crazy Jack. People live completely normal lives with mental illness. It's like any other illness and you are taking the steps towards a bit more normalcy." Dr. Carty had been with Jack since he checked into the facility. He felt like Jack absolutely needed to be hospitalized for the time he was in order to not only get to the root of his trauma but to allow his brain time to come to terms with it. He recognized all the progress he's made and wanted him to feel proud of that.

"Well how does it feel to interact with someone your own age who isn't a doctor?" Jack shrugged.

"She's fine. I mean we have a really cohesive sense of humor. I think if we did hang out, it wouldn't be awful but I'm pretty sure she's a nurse or something. She wears scrubs whenever she's not in regular clothes and when she's in regular clothes she's usually care-giving for her mom." Dr. Carty laughed making Jack tilt his head.

"You like her." He said confidently.

"What? No! We've had two conversations. That's hardly enough time to develop a liking to anyone." Jack defended.

"Haven't you ever heard of love at first sight?" Now Jack knew the doc was fucking with him.

"Yeah, thankfully I live in the real world. Plus everyone knows it's more like lust at first sight. No one can fall in love just seeing someone. That's based entirely on physical attraction." Jack was more of a pessimist when it came to love and attraction. Plenty of people could be attractive but love is few and far between. Jack can count on one hand how many people he's genuinely loved in his entire life.

"Well is she attractive?" Dr. Carty pressed.

"She's conventionally attractive, yes. I mean she hasn't cured my lack of sex drive but again, we've only spoken twice. I don't think I could fuck even if I wanted to." Jack had known the Doc for long enough that his random bouts of vulgarity didn't make him flinch.

"So you have decent conversation with a pretty woman who can match your intellect and has a dog you enjoy spending time with...She doesn't sound like an awful friend to make. Maybe you should work on that." Jack pushed away from the computer and ran his hands down his face.

"Why? I don't want to ruin anyone else's life. She's clearly a much better person than I am and she's already agreed to let me take the dog for walks on occasion so why risk ruining that with her getting to know me?" Jack genuinely feared letting anyone close at this point. Shanda had been with him since day one and the only person who has gotten a pass is the Doc and that wasn't something Jack asked for but has gotten used to.

"She's not Cleo, Jack." The mention of Cleo knocked the wind out of his chest.

"I know that." Jack whispered timidly before standing from his chair to move to the window.

"Just because you never received closure from her doesn't mean you can't move forward. You have done your part in taking accountability. We knew going into that you might not received the absolution of forgiveness." Dr. Carty himself had reached out to Cleo and was told she didn't care if Jack had dropped dead, she refused to talk to him after having their child cremated alone. Jack had sent a twenty page letter without any sort of response and when he sent a follow up, it was returned to sender.

The few times he dared to check social media, she had erased him from her entire existence. She had a memorial post for the baby but she didn't use his last name. When he accidentally liked one of her posts, he was met with a block on all outlets. Shanda had assured him that she had moved on and was doing better but he held onto that guilt for abandoning her after such a sudden miscarriage.

"What are you thinking Jack?" Doc's voice broke through his thoughts as he stood at the window. He could see Y/n down in her mother's garden watering the flowers and talking to her mom who was sitting in a wheelchair on the porch with Ace in her lap. He didn't need to know Y/n well to see she was a good person.

"The best thing she could do is to stay away from me. I'm just...I don't deserve that again. I wasted it the first time and ruined someone's life. What would I even do if I allowed myself to find that with someone else after Cleo? How do I explain to someone what I did to someone I loved enough to want to marry and start a family with?" Jack's ranting started to make his chest hurt.

"Jack, I want you to close your eyes and take a deep breath." Jack became annoyed but did as he was told counting in his head as he took a few deep breaths.

"You need to remember that we are not our mistakes. We all have flaws and blemishes but it's how we right our wrongs that define us. You are not a bad person." Jack opened his eyes feeling a slight burn from squeezing them so tightly. Jack let out a breath before digging in his pocket for a lighter, picking up a cigarette and opening the window abruptly. The daylight made it hard for his eyes to adjust at first but he didn't realize the sound of the window would draw any attention towards him. He was met with Y/n's gaze as he took a deep drag of his cigarette.

"You have to forgive yourself Jack. If you don't let go of that weight, it will drown you." Jack kept his eyes on Y/n as she smiled at him and waved. Jack returned a weak smile, biting his lip.

"I want to...I really do but I just don't think I can." Jack admitted out loud glancing over at the screen to see Dr. Carty was frowning. He hated ending his sessions on a such a negative feeling but he knew he was out of time today. He knew that Doc didn't want to leave him alone with these thoughts so he gave him self work to do over the weekend so it would keep him occupied. Self work always made him roll his eyes because he could knock assignments out easily but whenever he sat down to work on his writing, his mind would be blank. All he wanted to do was figure out how to feel normal again.

[semiweirdshipper]

I need to write these three narcissistic, dangerous, intelligent A-holes in a fic together with a reader, like, soon.

Geez, just imagine the chaos.

Herman is the reader's primary care physician.

Hannibal is their psychiatrist.

And then Wesker can be their boss or something like that.

The reader is just trying to get by (definitely has suffered some kind of past trauma, possibly has a mental illness or maybe even some kind of disease. I don't know yet, but I'll find a way to make them unique), and they're going by without realizing that these three powerful men have feelings for them.

Imagine Hannibal learning that Wesker has something to do with the reader's stress, and so he goes to seek him out to kill and/or eat him only to discover that Wesker is much more intelligent and dangerous than he thought- and he too also has feelings for the reader. Oh, the irony.

Herman can be a step ahead of both A-hole 1 and 2 by using his professional, sappy charm to woo the reader into a dinner date or a walk in the park or something. (Writing this prince charming of a man is like drinking redbull- He gives me wings, baby!) And maybe one of the other two A-holes show up or do something dramatic to try and ruin their time. Hell, maybe Wesker and Hannibal work together to ruin the damn date, I don't know, but I'm bound to write something stupidly insane.

All three of them want the reader to themselves, but there's competition. What are they gonna do about each other without ultimately ruining the reader's happiness and trust? All three of them are extremely manipulative, so charming the reader is a breeze, but what about when the reader becomes overwhelmed because- hello!- their doctor, boss and psychiatrist are all each asking them on a date! Ahhhhhhh.

Gosh, the things I could do with this concept... I know, I know, I need to stop. I just figured that getting the idea out of my head this way would help me concentrate on updates that are actually important.

Thanks for listening to my goofy rambling, my loves. Maybe this idea could be something that blossoms into a story one of these days. We'll see.

[echo-writes-things]

Hi I’m angsty anon😛 I recently got back into the saw movies and am now hyperfixating on them after seeing saw x in theaters. Wondering if I could request a fic about the father/daughter relationship between Amanda and John? Wondering if you could write Amanda getting the shit beat out of her like how Eric beat her up and John’s reaction, what he would do, if he would clean her wounds and take care of her, etc.

YES I CAN I LOVE SAW I COULD KISS YOU ANGSTY ANON IVE BEEN SO DESPERATE FOR SAW ASKS

Psycho Family Headcannons:

Let’s be real Amanda gets into fights a lot. Not even on purpose it just follows her wherever she goes

John always patches her up and tries to make it a lesson. That classic old man “we can learn from this” fatherly advice

It’s a ritual every time they run out of bandaids Amanda gets to pick new bandaids (yes she picks princess bandaids not for herself but to make hoffman use them)

John always hates that he can’t step in and stop Amanda’s fights. He’d ask Hoffman to do it but we all know he’s go “no no I wanna see what happens”

One VERY RARE occasion Amanda had to go to Jill for help getting patched up instead of John because he was gone probably for a doctor’s appointment. It was awkward but they both appreciated the experience

John is gone a lot for doctors appointments (cancer check ups usually happen every 3-6 weeks depending on the stage at least that’s what I experienced) each time he comes back he hears Amanda getting into a fight.

Eventually he pulls the “I won’t always be here to fix you..” and she bursts into tears (see what I did there? I referenced Saw III)

One day Amanda got into a real bad fight with a victim, blood everywhere and most of it was her own.

John when full panic. “What happened?! Who did this to you? How are you feeling? Anything broken? Maybe I should take you to the hospital.”

Amanda calmed him down but he still made her sit her gay ass down so he could patch her up.

John may know some stuff about simple first aid but anything past that he’s lost. Stitches? He can barely hold his hand still. But he’ll put some gauze on it and if need be he’ll have Hoffman do it since he’d definitely know more about that sort of thing.

If she’s crying he’s wiping her tears and telling her that it’s all gonna be okay. “I’m here now. Let’s get you cleaned up”

She called him dad once when she was crying from being hurt and he had a wave of emotions. He has mixed feelings being called dad. It was meant to be for his son after all, not this homicidal maniac druggie he picked up off the street. But he lets it slide after a while and eventually gets used to it

Hoffman never makes fun of Amanda while she’s hurt but once she’s cleaned up he bullies her relentlessly

John then has to break up the fight between his two mentally unstable children, “you shouldn’t be fighting each other like this. Honestly you’re both acting like preschoolers”

John isn’t one for “treats”. He’s not gonna give someone a lollipop for not crying during their shot you feel me? So he doesn’t really give Amanda anything after he patches up her wounds. He’ll give her a pat on the back and encouraging words like “you’re strong and you’re smarter than fighting aimlessly like this.”

John is against the whole “Don’t start fights but you can finish them”. He thinks people should just walk away entirely. Silly man doesn’t realize you can’t always walk away, Amanda has tried explaining that but he won’t listen

Amanda is desperate for hugs from John. She never asks for them verbally but he can catch on when she needs one

Despite him practically being bed ridden his hugs are firm as fuck, one of those hugs where you kinda cry a little no matter who you are, just from how nice it feels

Sorry it’s not a fic! I might write an actual fic using these but I’ve had these headcannons held in my brain ever since I saw these tragic mentally ill people. I’ve got so many headcannons and theories please people send in asks for them.

[antaresr]

An AU based on something that just happened to me (my traumas my fics xD)

Liberashipping, lovers to friends to lovers again, maybe Mpreg?

Yugi and Marik had a relationship a long time ago, in that relationship they had two children, due to differences in how they wanted to lead their lives they decided to separate.

Yugi stays with the children and Marik leaves, for many years Marik only maintained communication with his children and saw them occasionally when Marik returned to the city, he and Yugi only saw each other when Marik wanted to take the children somewhere.

One day Yugi becomes seriously ill, his children (who are now old enough to work) take him to the hospital, the doctor who treats him says that he needs emergency surgery, they register him and transfer him to the pre-op room.

Yugi comes out of the surgery well and stays hospitalized for a while to recover. Marik, for some reason, feels that something is wrong and for the first time in years calls Yugi's cell phone directly.

They have a talk to catch up on things and how work and life have been going, then Yugi tells him that he is hospitalized and why, Marik promises to go visit him as soon as he can get back to Japan, Yugi tells him that It is not necessary, the call was enough.

Yugi leaves the hospital a month later, his oldest son looks for a job that allows him to go out or be absent if necessary to be able to take care of Yugi, his youngest son reduces his class hours at the university and takes care of the game store and also takes care of of Yugi to stop Yugi from doing something.

Marik returns, and not only that but he buys all the medicines that Yugi needs and also other things so that he is comfortable while he finishes recovering.

Marik leaves again, but now he constantly keeps in touch with Yugi, more than with his own children.

On his youngest son's birthday he calls Yugi's phone, congratulates his son and then starts talking to Yugi, they talk for three hours, they laugh, they gossip, they remember the past and then Yugi drops a comment:

I was never jealous or prevented you from doing things

That hits them both, because they probably never stopped loving each other, they simply wanted to do different things with their lives and decided that it was healthier to be separated to avoid fights, misunderstandings and that one of them will start to hate the other.

Ishizu realizes his brother's internal debate, with many years of experience she tells him to do what he considers right and to make his heart feel light.

Marik thinks, the things that prevented him from staying by Yugi's side are no longer a problem (freedom, discovering the world, doing things that he would not have been able to do if he had stayed), he is older, he is old, and returning to who he considers his home makes him feel warm inside.

Marik goes to Japan, to the game store, when he knocks it is Yugi who opens it, when he sees Yugi's big eyes half closed due to the sleepiness caused by the medications, he knows that it is the right decision.

"I think going back to Japan is the best, so I can see you three." Marik knows he can't go back just like that, he has to win Yugi back.

When Yugi notices Marik's intentions, he has his reservations because he has already lived a large part of his life without him, he had other partners and has dedicated himself to his career as a game creator and his children, he never need someone else and Marik was a memory.

After a long time (really long), Yugi decides to give Marik ONE chance, an opportunity that Marik exploits to the fullest, showing Yugi that this time he is not going to fail or leave his side.