#if they didn't want us to ship it then why is carmy looking at her like she's the missing piece of his soul then

[bobaheadshark]

can we talk about how in the bear s2 Carmy gives syd not just any old chef whites but thom browne designer chef’s whites? not only does it bring together all that interesting sartorial and style stuff about his character from s1 (selling vintage denim for emergency beef etc) but our man had to estimate syd’s measurements or guesstimate them? like what is the level of detail and back of mind knowledge he just keeps on a bunsen burner about his cdc… that shit is startlingly intimate, please…

and the other alternative is they have all the staff’s measurements on file to buy uniforms anyway and he goes to sugar and asks her for syd’s and she’s like “huh why we have the order coming in for everyone already” and he’s like “it’s custom” and she’s like “hmmmm”/okay i’m not gonna press and he’s like “what i just thought it’d be nice”. like sure, jan.

[ciaomarie]

ESCAPING INTO A SHIP

So what exactly made me latch onto the Sydcarmy ship like a leech on a water buffalo?

It was unexpected (for me)! Yes, the very first meeting between Syd and Carm did make an impact. I thought "Oooh, what's this?!" However, Carmy was/is such a mess that I quickly dismissed it. And Sydney just seemed to want his professional approval and a partner in making something great after the soul-crushing failure of Sheridan. So, the first season I personally didn't feel a mutual sexual/romantic tension, more like an automatic respect and shared goals/passions. Sydney nor Carm were obviously trying to flirt. Most slow burns on TV are 100% obvious like a Jeanine and Gregory (Abbott Elementary), Nick and Jess (New Girl), Jake and Amy (Brooklyn 99), Jim and Pam (The Office)...Until Braciole Ep. 8 that is.

S. 1 Episode 8- I won't get into everything but Carmy was desolate. Yes, he became a psycho chef and two people quit in Ep.7. However, he mourned Sydney more than Marcus. She was in his flashback/nightmare (?), then the way he told Tina that she looked like Syd (the poor pup), him texting her before opening the note from Mikey, and finally the most gorgeous locked gaze scene since Pride and Prejudice (2005). The soft lighting, the music, the colors, the mind-reading...magical. I still didn't get it initially. Silly, blind me.

Mentorship where??? Season 2 Carm and Syd's "mentorship" dynamic is pretty much over. They are true partners and spending more time together. They're dressing alike even when not in uniform, finishing each other's sentences or talking in unison. Sydney is opening up more of herself and Carm is asking to know more. They use the ASL sign for sorry with each other and no one else until ep 10. Then there's that locker scene in ep. 1 or 2, when they almost hang out just cause. However, Carmy misses the moment and there's the return of the kicked pup face. Before being on the ship I was delighted with all of their scenes and was looking forward to the food tour. They just ROCK together on screen.

Classic Love Triangle- Who's Claire? She's "Claire Bear", the prototypical "cool girl", who is willing to chase an socially awkward, wrong-number-giving man, despite being a pretty ER resident with no shortage of options. Did a CW writer get hired? Anyways, why was her presence used almost exclusively to put strain on Carmy and Sydney's relationship instead of The Bear generally? We could have had scenes with Nat, Richie, and Marcus arguing with Carmy about him being distracted due to Claire. They saved 99% of that for Sydney. They CHOSE to insert her in between or just after scenes with him and Claire. Showing Sydney's tattoos and her getting dressed with the stained chef's coat juxtaposed with them was WILD.

I LOVE that both believe their interpersonal problems are solely about The Bear/business partnership. In most "slowburns" the characters are far more conscious and actively work to keep things platonic. Jeremy might be a smidge aware that Sydney means more to him after the panic attack, but I bet he's shoved it down. All he knows afterward is that being with Claire feels wrong hence ignoring her call and recommitting to SYDNEY. He could of said "You all/This/The Bear deserve my full focus etc..." He was also nagged into greeting Claire at Friends and Family, seemed anxious when Fak brought her up right before The Table scene, and also while explaining that "she's great" to Sydney. He was at peace when focused on Sydney in the moment below.

The actors: Jeremy and Ayo's real life friendship is warms my soul and their chemistry onscreen is amazing. DON'T WASTE IT!!!

Jeremy smolders on screen. I want to see Carmy continue to stare, yearn, fall, then eventually confess and for Sydney to reciprocate his feelings. Anyhoo, does anyone else melt when Carm means business?! They do this twice in season one and it's not good for me. Whew, I need to clean my whole house or run a few miles.

Finally, there's so many other parallels between these two. They are fearful avoidants, have a missing or dead parent, jacked up stomachs, use sarcasm, but are generally very earnest, they struggle with anxiety, are compassionate, are perfectionists, peace-makers, give people multiple chances, are workaholics...so much more. A lot of that is also ME, lol.

Sydcarmy is my Roman Empire. I love them as much as you can fictional characters and they deserve the most tender, angsty, triumphant, romantic best-friends to more love story.

[yannaryartside]

Carmy will have to decide between two types of love

I keep thinking about why Carmy (possibly) deciding between Claire and Syd is taking so much time on the overall plot of the series. We have used a entire season of him falling for Claire, and my theory is that in this season the Syd vs Claire is gonna be toe to toe, and then in the final season he goes for Syd.

Now, if that happens this way, I have been analysing it from a writers perspectives, how this love stories create Carmen ultimate character arc. I am gonna propose to you two narratives and why I would go for the later. Character analysis ahead.

The Claire option

Walk with me here. If you ship Claire and Carmy and believe the trailers, you could say this whole thing is about Carmy learning to accept love and good things. That is why the last season ended with him rejecting the relationship out of trauma just to realize that Claire loved him. This season could be about him healing to a point where he learns he deserves love, apologizing to Claire, and getting back together. And you know what, that does make sense, writing this show as an exercise for learning to heal childhood wounds. It is clean and makes sense. Then in s4 his new self can make all the good decisions, have a couple of kids, bum you have an arc.

But the background noise, or the clues floating around, to call it something, doesn't make sense. Here insert all the Sydcarmy clues the fandom has talked about.

The show is trying to tell us that Claire is the love Carmy wants because he is trapped in his wounded self mentality.

As I said in this post, Claire's behavior looked extremely naive but manipulative sometimes. Her relationship with his family and the trauma surrounding it. How everybody seems more enthusiastic than him about the relationship at times.

The reason: the wound.

Claire is uncomplicated love, love with no expectations or boundaries, with only space for his needs, never hers. That is the kind of love a child expects from a parent. My theory is that Carmen, being with Claire, wanted to experience that kind of love, the one he didn't get from Donna. with a touch of his teen self fantasies and sex included.

And that also makes sense. Everybody that has been abused, particularly in childhood, will tell you that picking a partner without relying on your wounded self is very difficult.

A little bit of TMI on healing from abuse when you look for a romantic partner: One of the reasons I got into therapy is because I was terrified to end up marrying a man as abusive as my dad was with my mom and me. I had a problematic episode with one of my exboyfriends that made me realize I was repeating specific patterns, even when consciously, I thought I was picking men who didn't act like my father. It is something difficult precisely because you are not aware of it. It is all happening subconsciously.

So maybe that is why the writers want to give Carmen the chance to choose a partner as a healed person (Syd) and not as a wounded person desperate for love (Claire)

You cannot choose a romantic partner looking for the love of a parent, because parent to child love is the only type of unconditional love that can exist. Some therapist will tell you that the only way to cure that lack is with self love and forgiveness, but that is besides the point of this post.

Romantic relationships cannot be unconditional, it is a partnership. There needs to be expectations of grow, sacrifices and compromises, the two people need to get their needs met. You may heal together, but you partner may trigger your wounds sometimes, the same as your other relationships.

Syd definitely forces Carmy to evolve, while Claire enables him and keeps him in his past self.

Now here is where I think the twist of the series will come.

Remember when I said that Carmys core wound is ther he felt he was not good enough for Donna to love him? Because he could not be like Michael? This is the post

Syd is Carmy’s anchor and his peace. She is also characterized as someone who helps people to grow, who gives grace and sincerity when mistakes are made. She is the actually healthy woman/parent he never experienced.

Carmen has not healed his core wound. The lie he believes that he has to go the extra mile to earn people's love. The way he became the best chef in the world, dreaming of just getting a “good job” from his older brother.

But because his wounded self doesn't feel like he can be enough for somebody he actually wants (Syd), he felt for a woman that didn't asked anything of him (Claire).

That (never giving but always receiving) dynamic is what allowed Carmy to accept the relationship in the first place.

Thinking of all this made me realize that not only has Syd been the only person Carmy had chosen for himself (as other posts have brilliantly pointed out), but Syd is literally the only person who can make a relationship with him work. She had seen the worst of him (Donna) and had the capacity to make him think of himself beyound all that, hence the peace that she brings him “you are the best cdc” as in “you are great, you are good, a good partner, a good leader, you are my friend” you are not just the bear (your wounded self). He smiles because the person that he wants can see this even if he doesn't dare to belive it yet.

So I don't know how they could make Carmy realize all of this. I also could be wrong and the meaning of all of this could be something completly different. I also don't know of this opinion is controversial. Let me know what you think. Thank you for reading.

[thoughtfulchaos773]

Thanks @vacationship for pointing out that Sydney initiates the first touch with Carmy in Review. As an obsessive person, I will analyze the choice to touch Carmy and the buildup to it.

(Warning: This might bring up some annoyance with Carmy. However, the tension and buildup leading to his explosion in this episode are incredibly well done. Looking back on the episode, it speaks to Carmy's character development season 2.)

So we fast forward to Ebra reading the review, revealing Sydney's dish as the restaurant's highlight.

Ribbon of brine, huh?

Carmy was already busy but noticed he didn't initiate eye contact with her like usual. The only time he looks her way is to shake his head in disappointment-hurt-anger that this dish she makes herself and that he says isn't ready. It gets a green light. Really, it's about Carmys not being genuinely ready to change for their relationship to develop. Carmy doesn't do this until fast forward - he loses Sydney.

Maybe the lack of eye contact tells us there's a disconnect, and there will continue to be a disconnect between them throughout the episode. And the GLARE carmy makes at Sydney. Everyone should already know shit about to blow up.

Carmy was ANGRY.

He's nodding in agreement, but you can make it out that he's stewing while sydney is asking for understanding, something he's struggling to give.

Sidebar: it brings up the importance of Tina's say hello to Jeff's friend. Carmy isn't feeling that connection - that friendship right now.so Tina saying that adds fuel to his fire.

Fast forward to more buildup, Richie and Sydney's argument. Carmy comes up with his baggage, ready to end the fight between him, but he is not much help.

Carmy intervenes, and there's still no steady eye contact with Sydney.

Oh and the importance of Sydney saying WE are learning (call back to carmy asking Sydney in 1x03 bridgade, WE want to make this place better, right?). Early on, they established their bond, but Carmy makes sure, maybe out of spite, to say the new system was her idea.

This is when Sydney really notices they are not on the same page. That he's pushing her away.

Which is what makes her make the unconscious decision to touch carmy. A plea to connect again.

Carmy stops like she asks him to through touch. Even though he was ready to walk away, he couldn't help but take a moment to pause even though they're under pressure with time. And for the first time, he really looks at her. His eyes come up even though he's still in his feelings about the whole thing.

That also tells us about Carmy's character. He doesn't talk about his feelings, which reminds me of episode 2x06 'Fishes', where Mikey had to practically drag out of Carmy the reason why he was so angry with him. When Carmy is hurt, he either explodes quickly or lets it brew until it's too late. There's no balance in his anger.

But Sydney helps with this. With their relationship, they want to keep the connection going, and in order to do that, with disagreements, there needs to be a goal to always maintain connection.

Arguments happen even with the most compatible people. It isn't toxic as some naysayers use it as an excuse to this ship. both strives to connect and carmy, although angry stops to give Sydney a minute.

But he still turned away and didn't hash it out with her. He didn't check early on if she was okay. This could be a lesson learned- a blow up may not have happened if he had given Sydney more time and connected with her despite his anger.

This gesture reveals a lot about their relationship dynamic, and looking back, it helps me appreciate Carmy's character growth. His desire to improve communication and become a better partner for Sydney? Sydney being the same way and their efforts to maintain their relationship is what makes the ship so compelling.

[imliterallyjustablackgirl]

« Il faut casser des oeufs pour faire une omelette »

So, that's a french saying basically meaning, you needs to break some eggs to make an omelette, and it brought me back how much Carmy was avoiding confronting Claire. There's this awkwardness because just like a mirror with his relationship with Syd something is being avoided. He's not saying what he's meaning. He clearly doesn't want to spend his time with Claire because everything they do is out of convenience. I want to dig more about chores and Claire in another post. There's a theme of plates, omelette- means thin plate, referencing his thinness. (Google it) Before Tumblr literally took my previous post, I said, the episode before, Carmen ditched Syd while she was choosing plates, then he brings Claire another issue he cannot figure out on his own at the restaurant, their place, on HER plate. Her not displaying anger meaning establishing annoyance, which I think deep down was Carmy self-sabotage's ways coming to surface, from the fact that he basically flaunted to her face that he was ditching their restaurant to hang out with Claire. It's not the fact he was only hanging out with Claire, it's the fact that mundane( mailing a letter) , non-important things were more important than her and the restaurant he supposedly wanted to make into a respectable place of business. The reality is Carmy is literally so scared of his own feelings he rather mirrors everything he wants with Syd with Claire because it's safer. Even failing with Claire is safe, look how quick he much he regresses and how quickly, didn't his relationship teach him that he was worthy of love with or without them? The eggs Carmy has to break are Claire's feelings by being honest with himself. What does Syd cook Nat? An omelette, is a juxtaposition of how breaking some things can bring warmth and help us take care of the people we love. Syd took time to talk to Nat, ask her what she needed and what she wanted, and took care of that need. The fact that it is that same meal that is brought under the table as well? The intimacy, something that was needed. There's this other saying « Jouer carte sure table» meaning play all cards on the table, or showing your hand, it 's basically mean being honest. A table can be a meta for so much and so are eggs so the both being in our ship just- I will tomorrow ( really this time, explain why it 's basically a set up)

[psychicpinenut]

okay this season was stressful but in a different way.

the quick pacing i'm used to was not there, there were scenes that were dragged out waaaay too much like genuinely did we need these chefs in ep 10 talking about their careers for like 10 fucking minutes?? and while it was a big emotional thing, did we really have to have an entire episode of JUST sugar and donna? like 40 minutes of nat going into labor and talking with her mom? idk...

i think a lot of sydcarmy peeps can't look past their frustration about the ship but since i lowered my expectations before, i could look at it more objectively. i don't know why people are saying claire had so much screentime this season, i was actually surprised at the lack of it, like they brought her up once or twice, we would get the occasional flashback but other than that i actually expected her to be in it more and for their conflict to at least begin to get resolved. atp i think carmy waited too long to apologize and it would be weird if she forgave him after all this.

anyway carmy went full psycho. he just keeps saying stuff and reassuring sydney but he never actually follows through with anything. he promises and promises and just falls back into his old patterns. like my dude you can't just keep talking and not actually do any of what you're saying. actions matter, not words. this is why sydney wants to leave you. which leads me into sydney just taking all his crap. why is she not saying anything? the whole season i was waiting for that big final blow-up, The Fight they were gonna have about his behavior which never came. she's just suffering in silence and wants to leave instead of trying to save their baby (the bear). and i understand!!! i totally understand why she wants to leave but at the same time i want her to fight for it. it's her dream also, they made it together. if she has to kick carmy in the balls to do it then so be it. like why is she letting him fuck up their restaurant?

carmy doesn't ask and she's not saying anything, major communication issues.

also way too many fucking faks. didn't ask, didn't care.

but i also have the mind to realize that carmy was supposed to be unlikeable this season i think. since this seems to be part 1 of someone, this was probably just a set up to something else and that's why the pacing felt off. so i'm keeping that in mind. i enjoyed this season actually like it was tremendous but it felt very slow.

[imliterallyjustablackgirl]

HONESTLY: Marcus and Syd would make such a nicer platonic friendship. Till this day, I think it would be more appropriate. Little rant: Yes, I've said it and I will say it again: Some of you only want Syd and Marcus because you do not want Carmy and Syd to be together. Your ship relays on how much you view yourself in Carmy and because some of you are just full blown bias racists, you refuse to aknowledge that however beautiful, interesting and multidimensional a darksin character might be, there isn't anyway Carmy would want her because YOU do not want her.

It is infuriating because : 1) Syd's already showed us she wasn't interested in Marcus like that, Quit frankly he might have been smitten but she was just glad she made a friend when everyone was giving her shit at her new job. 2) You think that every black character that interact must date, mostly if they are in the same age pool. I wonder if Syd would have been a black man and let's say Carmy a white lady. The edits and overall just acceptance of the character and ship would have been different. The implications would have been different. 3) You are using Marcus as a scapegoat. For everything else: The fact that they cannot date because another guy has interest in her: And? Marcus doesn't control Syd, Syd control Syd. The '' she shouldn't because of Marcus'' : Stiiinkkks of misogynoir. + ''He's so sweet tho'' and? She. is. not. interested. and that got her screamed at by the way( at really important moment F-F night, HE didn't like it when CARMY did it to him, so- 1+1 = sure as hell don't = 3) by y'all cinnamon roll. I do not HATE Marcus, I like him but the one that use his status in the show often irks me, isweartogod. The same way I am still waiting for Richie's apology, I will be waiting for Marcus's. The show depict toxic masculinity wonderfully and how it impacts mental health and mostly men's health, we see it with grief and we see it with accountability. We get to see theses characters be imperfect and whole, trying their best at life. I think Syd is allowed to have that too. The room to be a person. Even if she were to date Marcus, how does it look that y'all couldn't fathom the idea of her finding love with Carmen, the man she respects and he LITERALLY hovers around her. He is so alert it almost seems painful.

Sydcarmies, please be aware of the racism that often comes with the implication of people saying theses things becasue it won't stop with the Bear. ( Look at TVD with Kat Graham, Sleepy hollow or even Flash -) You will see it with other shows, they expect black women and characters to be seen not heard or understood, that is why there is so many negative comments about her character...I saw someone on Youtube COMPLAIN she didn't open up to Carmy sooner about HER mother's DEATH. I need to find it.

People already do it with everything else, gaslighting black women/ characters or not. I'm glad I got a group of people that sees the vision for real, because places like Reddit scares me and quite frankly make the fandom so hostile. The idea that romance is so overbearing is a representation in my opinion of a lack of emotional intelligence. Love change people, inspire people , is world wide. Love can change, one time you love someone as a friend and then it changes to more. I'm so glad for this show fr, I want to work in the art field and I love to cook, till this day, it was a form of art that made me feel less alone. Sharing food is a love langage. So the fact y'all are nourrishing me with our common love for this show, is *chef kiss*. (Keep on posting babies xxx). (Shameless plug) I'm glad I get to share my love of the bear family w you. https://archiveofourown.org/works/52001119/chapters/131500966

Saw the clip of Ayo saying she didn't have romance in mind when playing the character and wants more platonic m/f relationships on tv which is 100% valid (I just want different in this case)...

but then I remembered that one scene where they're cooking together in the middle of the night in the Beef and in a moment of silence, the song rings out "this is what love feels like"

and I think that maybe the editors weren't on the same page

(that said, a romance not played as a romance while the foundation is being laid...makes for a great romance)