#if there's another reason i genuinely cant figure it out

[asexual-levia-tan]

i keep forgetting my cat is afraid of the dark

im sitting here like "why does she like sleeping on the couch next to me in the living room, but hates going to bed in my room???" yeah its cause when im in the living room the light is on and when we're in my room going to bed the lights are off

[sirompp]

just saw a l0whunt post where they KISSED feeling VERY violated even though it was properly tagged and i was the one who clicked on it anyway. but.

[starboye]

pairing: ethan landry x male reader

request: Definitely Ethan (Reader boyfriend) , could do when reader finds out he’s ghostface in the end of scream 6

warnings: angst, cursing, kinda yandere ethan

you had always thought that your boyfriend ethan was the shy closeted away kind of guy, he didnt talk much to others and was the hottest nerd youd ever met, and he was very romantic.

but as time went on you found him drifting farther and farther away from you physically and emotionally, you thought nothing of it at first but then you started to find it a little suspicious so you did some digging.

you formed an investigation of your own and connected the dots to realize that ethan was ghostface, at first you didnt wanna believe it so you headed to ethans house with one thought in mind "was ethan really the ghostface killer", you arrived at the house and headed in thanks to the extra key he gave you.

you waited out in his room waiting for him to come through the door, soon your head his bedroom window open and saw a figure crawl through, lightly illuminated by the moon light, as you got ready to defend yourself with whatever you could find.

as the hooded figure stood up and took off the mask you saw it was ethan under it "ethan" you say shocked to your core "y/n?" ethan says covering your mouth as to not wake anyone in the house "howd you get in here" ethan asks uncovering your mouth slowly hoping that you calmed down.

"no the real question is why the fuck are you ghostface" you question taking a few steps back from ethan "i swear i didnt mean for you to find out this way i promise i was gonna tell you" ethan says trying to calm you "tell me what that my boyfriend that i love so much is really a murderer and killed a bunch of people" you retort.

"well when you put it like that it doesnt sound that great" ethan chuckles "nothing's fucking funny ethan" you shout "okay okay just calm down and talk to me" ethan says with a lower voice "n-no im leaving" you say tuning to the door "wait y/n" ethan says pulling you back.

"fucking let go of me ethan" you say trying to break his grip "please y/n just listen to me i-" ethan tries to explain but you kick him of of you "i loved you ethan and this is what you do to me" you say tears brimming at your eyes "y/n im sorry let me make it up to you" ethan says.

"how ethan how could i possibly get back with a murderer ethan" you say now tears running down your cheeks "cant you just fucking forgive me im sorry" ethan says pulling you into a tight hug and not letting you break his grip "i love you y/n i really really love you" ethan brokenly says.

you nuzzle into his warm embrace, remembering a time were ethan was a genuine guy, nice, cute, and your fun little nerd, not a ravenous murderer "i love you too ethan but i cant do this" you lowly say crying into his chest "please just stay with me" ethan says rubbing your back to comfort you.

"no im not falling for this trap" you say pulling out of ethans warm embrace with ouffy eyes "goodbye ethan" you say before walking out of his room, ethan watching you with a broken heart, he looks down and stares at the ghostface mask for a minute before throwing it on his bed.

you both cried your eyes out that night and both for different reason, and after the whole incident youd come home regularly to find flowers with notes or others gifts presumably from ethan trying to apologize but youd just throw them away.

no matter how many times youd throw them away ethan would just replace it with another slew of gifts, wanting you too be his forever and ever, and nothing was gonna stop him from succeeding in having you.

taglsit: @mailmango

[envy-of-the-apple]

First of all. Stunning writing as always, my jaw was ON THE FLOOR MULTIPLE TIMES, ごちそうさまでした (thank you for the meal). Next of all— Do you wanna psychoanalyze the monster you know Gojo? Because I’m intrigued, but also confused!

Gojo subconsciously REALLY wanted the reader to know the truth about himself, we see that everytime he says it — that he’s a monster. Why did he pretend to be normal then? To not be a monster? // And because Gojo pretended to be normal, why wouldn’t he pretend he was normal when he was caught in the bathroom? Was it like, he was relieved almost, and content, when reader found out the truth about him? Why didn’t he just tell her or make it obvious earlier?

You don’t have to answer this of course! Thanks for reading my ask!

you-you wanna hear me talk about gojo?? rlly???? ilyletsgetmarried

okokok so i think to explain this ill need to talk about my personal hc of gojo!

kid gojo and adult gojo behave extremely differently, right? Kid gojo is….really really off putting. I remember when Gojo turns to look at Toji for the first time and his eyes are just….empty Like even Toji saw the crazy and was freaked out. That was NOT a human being you cannot tell me other wise. Like if me and kid gojo were stuck in a room together i'd turn religious so fast-

buuuut I think along the way Gojo realized that he needs to put expressions on his face and cut to high school and he’s being a silly billy<3. I think that Geto helped him out with this, another reason why he’s so nostalgic of that era. But even now we can see it’s an act and he slips every so often. When he’s alone, when he’s fighting curses. Terrifying, honestly.

(ik its not rlly an act. its more like a face he puts up? so more genuine than an act, but not as sincere as...lets say yuji's demeanor)

when Roomie is looking at the picture of kid gojo, he hadn't figured out how to hide it, or that he should. even Roomie was freaked out by kid gojo.

but i cant blame gojo for being...yknow...demented. even when he wasn't the strongest, he was very different from everyone else. i'd akin it to being stuck in a world where everyone is a dog. cute. you love dogs! but without a human connection, it can get lonely pretty fast because as loving as dogs are...they cant understand you.

and then you meet a dog who doesn't look like a dog at all. they insist you are a dog too, but you aren't. and when you do a horrible thing only a human could be capable of.... they don't choose other worse dogs, they choose you.

the bathroom scene was gojo's breaking point. he didn't want to pretend to be a dog anymore, because he wasn't. again he def did not mean for roomie to catch him jerking it buuuut he def sorta gave into being....himself into the one person he can actually see yknow????

[3liza]

saw someone talking about "scary dog privilege" on here today and cant find the post again but i guess it refers to when women are bothered less in public when accompanied by a large dog, and bypassing the quibble i have with calling that a privilege, i can absolutely 100% confirm it is true.

i was approached by a 30s-40s single white man wearing the Dipshit Uniform (guy in a baseball cap who looks like he drives an f-150 and has voting opinions i would not agree with) on the street the other day and all he had to talk about was Churchgrim. that he was VERY large, looked like a good boy, obedient, what breed is he, etc. this is the only interaction i get from men in public anymore unless i do not have the dog with me, at which point it goes back to the usual bullshit. however it has to be an actual scary-looking dog and you have to visibly have control of it. this is not why i got a large dog, it's just a side benefit. it probably has a lot to do with the masculine cultural coding of any large dog breed that isnt a poodle or a sight hound more than it does the actual violence potential of the dog, but those two things are related. notably, not a SINGLE man has tried to mansplain dog care or handling to me for five years. not one. i cant explain this because its not like being visible capable at a task or skill will stop them in any other circumstance, including when you are holding a literal firearm.

i remember reading some stupid op-ed from some idiot woman who got a dog "for protection" on her jogs and was baffled when men were not intimidated by her golden fucking retriever (although they should have been; goldens bite a lot, statistically, probably explicitly because people do not take them seriously)

the fact that men's body language and tone of voice has changed so drastically from before when i had a 90lbs black shepherd mix standing next to me is pretty damning tbh. all people both intentionally and unintentionally modulate their communication styles around that type of dog to display respect, interest, or fear, experienced dog people can be identified instantly by their comfort and confidence with the dog, and people with dog phobia are the opposite. the dog instinctively puts himself between me and approaching strangers, probably not out of a defensive instinct in grim's case but because strangers are interesting and he wants to be closer to the object of interest, but the physical barrier this creates is a great benefit to me.

specifically, men talk to me much much much more like they are speaking to another man when the dog is there. part of that is men are often genuinely interested in knowing information about a large dog of grim's type and are not using the dog as an excuse to flirt with or harass me. grim has a phenotype that is familiar to certain experiences within the united states as a "porch dog" or "yard dog" or "farm dog" that everyone who has lived in rural areas has usually known or owned a few notable examples of, and thats a general class of dog that tends to be good at listening and responding to humans and has a lot of opportunities to display intelligence or good judgment, so people with rural experience tend to associate him with good memories. he's also "handsome" in the dog sense because he got to keep his balls until he was 3, on the advice of his vet, and as a result he developed nice-looking musculature and a big thick neck which you dont get on city dogs much. he gets a lot of positive attention from older ladies as well, who you'd think would be afraid of being knocked over, but who are always just besotted with him for reasons i havent quite figured out yet. maybe they like seeing a youngish woman with a dog like this, i know that i feel good and happy when i see younger women and girls in situations where they seem safe or protected to me. i think to myself, "i don't have to worry about her" and i feel relief. observing young women and girls often triggers anxiety for women who are even just a few years older than they are, out of pure empathy. its one reason it's so important to be kind to younger people than you are.

anyway it's damning to the men because of course men don't think rationally that the dog would understand and be offended or angry if they sexually harassed or disrespected me. but they are still on their best behavior because the dog is an implicit threat that i can defend myself. and perhaps not only did they have nothing real to discuss with me before now because they assumed we had nothing in common and that i was an idiot or not human, but they are watching themselves carefully to only express normal human civility. i dont get that from random men without the dog. mostly (not entirely but mostly) i get either casual disrespect/disregard, or outright sexual harassment. when i was younger and less experienced with men and had fewer cycles of these interactions, i was completely unaware of how disrespectful these approaches or comments were, which is the interpretation i can see less-experienced women making now, even if they're my age. and when i was 20, my 30 year old friends seemed pathologically misandrist and defensive to me. it was purely the difference in our actual mileage. that sucks man. wish we could just be normal around people and not have to expect the worst constantly.

anyway, good dog

[chuuya-kisser]

im finally free so that i can fucking scream abt bsd 117 and tell my thoughts on this heartbreaker of a chapter (will def make another post feeding my delusions)

(spoilers utc)

firstly.

ASAGIRI. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUXK ASAGIRI. ASAGIRI WHEN I CATCH YOU ASAGIRI I THOUGHT YOU WERE KILLING-YOUR-CHARACTERS-PHOBIC?????? NOW YOUVE MELTED TWO IMPORTANT CHARACTERS IN TWO CHAPTERS???? WHOS GONNA GO NEXT CHAPTER HUH WHO'S NEXT IN YOUR DEATH NOTE

well

Uh yeah so anyways basically heart broken for multiple reasons so we'll go in order

1- aya. oh my gosh aya. shes what, a ten year old?????? and in the span of a day, she has found out about a vampire lord who is responsible for destroying or saving the whole world, shouldered the responsibility of getting said vampire lord away from the enemy to save the world, developed a father-daughter relationship with said vampire lord, sacrificed herself and got saved by him, believed that the world could be saved now, saw her new father figure's body be torn apart and replaced by a greasy ratass who wants to destroy everything or whatever, with said new father's last words telling her to run to save herself, being saved by said father, then having him dissolve and die again in front of her eyes again. shes a ten year old. what the actual fuck. oh and don't forget, she doesn't know that she lost her other father figure too!

gosh she is going to be SO traumatised and even that is an understatement i really hope she has the strength to recover

2- so akutagawa is back huh? about time, about time (though im not very happy about the cost it took- but atleast he's back?)and he has agreed to protect aya on brams wish? thats surprising honestly, so im wondering if the stuff atsushi told him while fighting him at the airport or whatever affected his subconscious or something so that he consciously wants to start protecting people?

OR maybe! he sees a bit of himself in aya or smth? i mean look i dont exactly remember what happened before he met dazai and was taken in by him okay, dont come at me. but maybe he sees that terrified little kid and something stirs in him or smth anyways go akutagawa go you're her third father figure please dont die again ‼️

(also he looks so good-)

3- and the biggest bombshell

kunikida.

KUNIKIDA‼️‼️ NO NO NO THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING PEOPLE THIS IS NOT I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT I AM IN DENIAL

just- THINK ABOUT EVERYONE. think about atsushi and tanizaki. who saw him disappear slowly in front of their eyes, to buy them time. think about fukuzawa. who wished for kunikida to be the next president because he was the most ideal. who cares so much, even if he doesnt show it as much. think about aya. she has such a deep bond with kunikida, and now she'll have to face the devastating news that one of the only people who truly believed in her is gone too. think about ranpo and yosano.

think about dazai. who is much too far away to do anything right now, who miscalculated once which led to him being too far to stop fyodors rampage in any way. who was truly doing all this because he wanted to keep the detective agency safe. who, when he realises what will happen next, his first thought is to warn them. who was his new partner, kept him alive, even made him a part of his schedules. who i think he must have to care for, even a little bit.

dazai, who thinks that anything worth wanting is always lost the moment he obtains it. and its happened again. and by the looks of it, it will happen again.

i genuinely want to know how he'll react but i dont want to at the same time. gods i cant fucking do this man

like huhhh asagiri are you tryna make me cry or some shit???? Because youre succeesing SPECTACULARLY

also- are we gonna see tanizaki get liquefied too next chapter? because this panel sure looks like it

im scared for september now like what else are you gonna throw at us, huh asagiri? and what do you mean i have to wait a whole month this is crazy

and i am STILL in denial and will continue to be in denial guys wdym, ofc kunikida is alive and well! hes coparenting aya with bram, having fun at the agency and stuff ‼️‼️ hes perfectly peachy theres no helicopter singularity out for everyone's lives!!! (wow this post is LONG)

[k-s-morgan]

Hey! I hope you are alright.

If it wont be spoiler or something can you tell why Tom is using harry's cups, plates and the other things, i really Wonder and cant stop thinkining about it.

And i want to say it Adore ATLWETD. For me, fav fic of all time

Another ask: When Tom asked "what was i to you" and harry replied "i dont know" what did Tom think? And why tom is asking those questions at first place?

Another ask: hey, are you okay? I hope everything is okay there. I don't know if it means anything but my prayers are with you.

I have two question about ATLWETD.

First what did Tom feel when harry hugged him? And what are Tom's future plans for both of them? What he want?

If you dont want to answer i understand and its alright.

English its not my first language so if there is any mistake or misunderstand i am sorry.

Another ask: I just figure out how to use tumblr and as soon as i did i came your acc. I love your works. ATLWETD is reason is am still reading tomarry. I just wonder what Tom is planining rn. Take Harry to knigts and the other things. if it wont be problem i want to hear your answer, love you!

---

Since these asks are sort of related, I decided to combine them into one!

First of all, thank you all so much, both for your words and prayers! I'm so pleased that you're enjoying ATLWETD and that you're thinking of me.

Some of Tom's thought processes will become clearer later on, but I don't mind offering the specifics, especially since we won't be getting his POV until the middle of the story.

Tom has been using his mood stone on Harry repeatedly. He's been mystified by all the emotions Harry seems to be alternating between, and one in particular has intrigued him most, which is attraction.

Tom's been wondering about the specific nature of their 'alternative world' relationship for a while, and now he's begun to suspect that maybe they were romantically involved - or on the brink of becoming involved. He's curious and fascinated by this possibility. He wanted Harry to answer him truthfully, and Harry saying "I don't know" proved his hypothesis that while they weren't together, they were probably about to be in some near future.

If you liked Tom using Harry's things, just wait until the Tie Saga in the next chapter :D It'll be hilarious. Poor Harry will be so confused and frustrated by Tom's actions.

Now, why is Tom doing that? A part of it is him testing how receptive Harry is to something this intimate. To him, it's yet another indication that they were closer than friends, and since Harry doesn't react, it's probably something the other Tom did, too. Another big reason is the violation of boundaries. Tom feels entitled to Harry, to everything he is and everything he owns. He views Harry as his thing, his personal person, and he's determined to take his freedom piece by piece because Harry is supposed to be an extension of him, in his eyes. There is genuine possessiveness in him as well.

Making Harry a part of the Knights also feels into this context. Tom wants Harry to be involved in his life to the fullest extent. He's interested in seeing what Harry is going to think and how he's going to react to some of his plans and ideas. Tom has seen valuable qualities in Harry, and he wants to use them for his benefit.

What Tom felt when Harry hugged him - uncertainty, mostly. Unexpected warmth. Fascination. Some awkwardness. It's one thing to build theories about their alleged romantic relationship, but it's another to get a more physical confirmation of it.

Tom isn't planning or not planning to become involved with Harry romantically right now. He's just watching how everything unfolds, and he's increasingly interested in being surprised and experiencing something new.

[drdemonprince]

Autistic friend anon here — thank you so much for your answer and the substack post. I was kind of stuck in the “rejection” feeling of “wait but if being autistic isn’t a bad thing then why are you so upset at the idea that YOU might be autistic”. I took it really personally and wasn’t really thinking about how much it sucks when someone acts like they know you better than you do. I’ll have to keep working through that.

I also often get stuck in the idea that “well if someone had just TOLD ME I was queer/trans/autistic then I could have figured it out sooner and life would be better” or whatever. But after many years of being out as queer/trans, I think that isn’t actually true and even if it is, I don’t interact with other possibly queer/trans people by “diagnosing” them with queerness/transness any more. In my head it seemed like autism was different for some reason, but of course it is not.

Anyway, your answer was really thoughtful and diplomatic, while also being very clear about what is bad behavior on my part. It is genuinely going to be a big benefit in my life.

Hey, nice to hear from you again!

I totally feel you. When I told a friend years ago that I thought she might be a BPDer, I was incensed that she ended up not taking that comment well. I meant it in an affirming, pro-Mad-Pride kinda way! I was a BPDer too! if she thought it was bad to be BPD, what did that mean she thought about me?

But I was looking at it the wrong way. I had just hurled a still very stigmatized label in her direction as a response to her complaining about real relational struggles in her life, which felt diminishing and presumptive. Telling various people in my life that I'm pretty sure they're Autistic can have a similar effect, even if they're on board Autism acceptance as an idea.

I used to fixate on the time I lost not realizing I was trans or queer or whatever the fuck I am yet. I had a vision of an older me materializing before me at age 16, specifically on the corn-lined roads I used to bike up and down furiously, and imagined telling myself the Truth of who I was and what I had to do to be happy. I believed that if i had known I was trans younger I would have avoided a lot of upsetting relationships, eating disordered periods, and general angst.

Now. I am pretty damn sure that is not true. It turns out that being trans was not a solution to all my problems, it was just another problem that I had. In the sense that it's a challenge to navigate on this bitch of an earth. if i hadn't chosen to be trans i would have chosen some other shit to do that also would have been a major pain in the ass i'm sure. that too would have been an interesting back story.

I dont think I was ever going to be outgoing and unneurotic and breezily well adjusted. That's not my lot in life. Feeling a little uncomfortable in my body and around other people is as definitional a part of me as my wit or my weird laugh. I can kinda love that about myself now, or at least accept it. nothing and nobody actually could have saved me. its just not that simple. but it's been a pretty interesting life.

i think we tend to impose our self-narratives onto other people when we are not happy or we are harboring deep regrets about having gotten something wrong or missed something in the past. but we cant spare our friends those journeys. they should get to have them. it's interesting and enriching to get things wrong, be in denial, cope in elaborate stupid ways, soul search, change our minds, miss something, find something, never know what's true.

[factual-fantasy]

28 Asks! :DD Thank you!! :}} 🛒

@raven-bearden-the-interviewer42

She met Seafoam when she rescued his ship from a great storm out at sea. :00

She brought the ship to safety and the next morning Seafoam crawls out into the deck and pulls himself over the railing to look around. All bruised and cracked from being thrown about the ship all night <XDD

That's when their eyes meet.. she tells Seafoam the story of how she saved his ship. And Seafoam is endlessly grateful! He was so kind and genuine.. 💞

@starz-nova

XDD Thank you!! :DD I'm glad you like it! :}}

@holly-opal (Link in ask)

I have not, but I know of it! :00 A friend of mine loves it and has recommended it to me. I've always considered reading it but never got around to it <XDD

A lot of people commented that he looks a lot like Davy Jones from Pirates of the Caribbean, so I imagine yes! <XDD

He might be happy to find someone that looks similar to him! :DD Though he probably wouldn't approach her.

If he saw someone like that, it'd be on shore. And if he's on shore? He's with his crew. Which means he's got a lot of people too keep track of and protect- he has no time to get distracted by interesting ladies! XDD

@sussyhahag

Man I've put one some weight-- XDD

But thank you! I'm sure Grim and "Gengar me" would be great friends :}}}

@beryl-shade

I could! :DD Maybe he'd be another pirate, they could call him "Tack" for short! :}}

While I imagine she'd love to help out in that way, I imagine Seafoam tends to his own laundry XD

@neo-metalscottic (Gerald's one year in question)

Thank you so much!! :DD The other comic is almost done and I'm hoping to post it soon! I've just had a few rough days with my health so Its not coming out as fast as I'd hope.. 😅 That, and I've been a bit mentally preoccupied daydreaming about web comic ideas.. 😞

As for Morton, I think his skin color will be a simple case of melanism! Nothing too crazy or magical there! <XDD As for his name and how he talks, I think its a reasonable idea that he would be named after a previous king! :0 Perhaps a previous king who had melanism as well..? 👀 Who knows XD

Though with his voice, I cant imagine him talking all "hulk" like. Since he's a part of the royal family he would have access to only the best education and speech therapy (if needed-). So the likelihood of any of the Koopalings having speech problems or talking "hulk" like would be low 😅 though that's not to say that out of all his siblings, he leans towards that type of speech the most! :00

As for Kammy and Kamek, she's not nearly as old as him. I was thinking Kamek is hundreds of years old, while Kammy is the Koopa equivalent of like... 60-70? She was brought into the koopa palace to be a nanny/maid. Her power is different from Kamek's, though I haven't figured out all the specifics yet.. I guess it can be said that when it comes to magic, they both studied and mastered different things.

Now if she ever faced Kamek in combat? He would flatten her. There is no Magikoopa alive today that can compare to Kamek's power..

...Doesn't mean she's afraid to get on his nerves though XDD She loves to mess with him, knowing that he's not allowed to hurt her.🤪

And lastly, its interesting to hear about the Vehicons getting some more originality! :00 My favorite out of those 3 would have to be the red one :}}

AWE! Thank you so much!! :DD I'm honored!! :}}}

@unicornfpotatoesdir

Nah, he's always gonna be littol! XDD And thank you!! :}}

@milk-powrit

My first instinct was no.. since Jangles is like 2.5-3 feet tall and I always imagined sans to be 4.5-5 feet tall. But google says sans 2 feet tall??? XDD If we're going by Googles standards then yeah Jangles is taller- but my heart dont want to believe he's that short 🤣💀

As for the 20k post, Jangles wasn't holding anything other than Gerald.. so I assume you meant this post..? <:0 If so, its a granola bar! Its been most if my diet recently so I imagine I had a few extra lying around for Jangles <XDD

@snailfen

So far I really like it!! :DD Better than Sword and Shield imo that's for sure <XDD

I do not. <:/ But you can find all my Pokémon stuff under #pokemon scarlet and violet or #pokemon in my blogs search bar! <:D

@lathan-chillyfilm

Funky lookin guy, I like him! XDD

@tallchest13-blog

*Cici tugs at my arm

"......so you gonna drink that-" XDD Thank you!

Thank you so much!! :DD I've got my hopes back up recently, hoping I'm over all this soon! :}} 🤞🤞

@yourstrulylightstar283

Awe, thank you!! :}}}

Oh yeah, after the wars all said and done? I'm sure he's pull back on that extreme and get some repairs done 🥺

@mimiocto

You know to be honest, Grim is very dangerous becuase his brother is a Sylveon. XDD If I remember correctly, V is higher level than Grim in the game. Dragon types better watch out! XDD

Oh hey! I've seen that guy around! I used to think he was Shockwave <XDD And he appears to be an Autobot?? With how Chaotic he is in fanart I thought he was a Decepticon-💀

But anyways- yes! With the fanart I've seen of him, I think him and Bash would be great friends XDD

@artblock200322022

Thank you! I'm glad you liked those comics! :DD

Though at the moment, I don't have plans to jump back into that fandom anytime soon. <:/ I've have some uncomfortable experiences with the Octonauts fandom recently so I'm taking a bit of a break for now-

@bee-the-inevitable-death

I don't see a reason to go through the effort to maintain an account on another website. <:0 I have all my inside jokes, my follower celebrations and all my followers right here in one place! Its much nicer :}

Awe! Thank you so much!! :DDD I'm glad :}}}}

@pink088

Nah its fiiiiine dw! As long as I have the bandages on the blood will stay in my hands surly :}} but thank you for the tea! :D

(Referencing this post)

XDD Are we sure it wasn't [M]ango?

Daaannngg.... Homestuck is way bigger than I thought-

@snailshard

That looks beautiful!! :DD And thank you! :}}

[psychiatricwarfare]

one thing that really gets under my skin is how allistics Love to pretend that if we just said things the Correct Way™ (whatever that means, since none of them are willing to explain it to me) then maybe our lives wouldnt be so hard & if we could just learn how to communicate Properly all our problems would be solved. so millions of autistic kids took to studying the dictionary, paying attention in english class, learning definitions and nuances, connotations, cultural contexts, implications, the ways the order of the words affects the meaning of the sentence, deciphering which adjective works Best in this context, figuring out which word should be emphasized over the others in the sentence (if any at all!), and doing that before every single sentence we say. and its still wrong. because it turns out, the "implications" they were talking about has nothing to do with the order i said my words or the exact definitions of the words, its a mysterious other problem that they wont tell me because i should just Know why whatever they think i said was mean.

and this is just what happens when we're actually able & willing to do these things, a lot of autistic people either dont care to put in all that effort or genuinely can't do it for one reason or another. but it doesnt matter, there's actually no way to be autistic without allistics misunderstanding you constantly and making it out to be our fault that they refuse to put any work into understanding us. its not fair the amount of effort i have to put in to Try and understand what the fuck allistics are on about half the time but they cant be bothered to do the same for us

i love autism and i would never choose to not be autistic given the chance but it's really fucking shitty sometimes

happy autism month, please keep listening to autistic voices even after the month is over

[cloudcountry]

What twst characters do you think would be good and bad at flirting?

i have Opinions.

Riddle Rosehearts - mmm bad. but so bad its cute. like he's trying to invite you to a tea party, blurts out the information, spins on his heel and marches off with a red face.

Ace Trappola - UGH HES SO ANNOYING he'd use cheesy one liners with a smug grin so if thats your type of thing come get him.

Ashton Vargas - i hate him. he sucks. also uses cheesy one liners but its layered with a vibe of superiority that makes me want to punch him.

Azul Ashengrotto - MY LOVELY <3333 AAAAA i can see him being suave if he's trying to butter you up, but when you say something back he's like ?!?!?!?!??!?! WHAT. he won't believe you though :((

Cater Diamond - aww he's so sweet!! but really devious. YK HIS BIRTHDAY BOY LOG IN LINES???

I SCREENSHOTTED THIS SHIT FOR A REASON!!! I WAS LIKE WHAT THE FUCK?!?!??! THAT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE. he's good.

Che'nya - good i think!! he's naturally very mischievous so he'd be the type to sneak it a flirty comment that you don't process until a few seconds have gone by.

Deuce Spade - AWW sorry no :(( he can't flirt for the life of him BUT its so bad hes cute!! yk?? like he's stumbling over his words as he tries to tell you you're eggcellent. his mom put him up to it.

Dire Crowley - hmm. he's a bit hard to pinpoint but i dont think he'd suck? hes bad but i dont think he'd be as bad as vargas.

Divus Crewel - i know everyone likes to think he's like super flirty or smth but i don't think so. he gives the vibes of someone who wants something more serious so his flirting would probably be less playful and more serious compliments on your work.

Epel Felmier - i cannot see him flirting for the life of me unless he was feeling particularly devious??? but also epel is a character that i cant write for the life of me so take everything i say about him with a grain of salt.

Floyd Leech - he platonically flirts a lot. flirts by biting you. he has a way of making his voice sound very pleasing to the ears so yes he's good.

Idia Shroud - PFFT LOSER. idia kissers knew this was coming. ygys know him. he doesn't flirt. he insults you and gets scared when you get mad. "why don't they like me?!?!" YOU CALLED THEM A NORMIE YOU WEIRDO

Jack Howl - like crewel, his flirting is more serious and genuine. he'll compliment your work and what you've done well. also wags his tail. he's good!!

Jade Leech - IS A BASTARD. he will humiliate you because he thinks its FUNNY. never let him figure out that you're easily flustered or he will NEVER LEAVE YOU ALONE (unless you like him the win ig???) he's good!!

Jamil Viper - I AM HERE TO SPREAD MY EASILY FLUSTERED JAMIL AGENDA. he doesn't flirt but if you ever flirt with him he'll get embarrassed.

Kalim Al-Asim - contrary to popular belief, kalim knows when he's flirting with you. its just...he's so friendly with everyone that you cant really tell. hes bad at getting his actual feelings across.

Leona Kingscholar - he's smug but thats about it??? he doesn't really flirt but if he compliments you you've already won at life so does it matter?

Lilia Vanrouge - HES A LITTLE SHIT. another one that won't leave you alone if he finds out that you're easily flustered. he's good >:T

Malleus Draconia - bad because he doesnt know what hes doing. he doesnt know how to talk to people informally. people find him charming anyway though!!

Mozus Trein - he's too miserable and tired to flirt sigh

Najma Viper - kinda has the same problem that kalim has except i can see her being very touchy. like hand holding and hugs. so if thats your kind of thing, then its good!!

Neige LeBlanche - the type to giggle if you compliment him (me.) he's very sweet, the type to get you flowers and kiss the back of your hand in greeting. good!!

Rook Hunt - hes good because hes so poetic and such a tease. h e can be touchy too, if thats what you like.

Ruggie Bucchi - he'd pinch all over your face as his way of flirting. he's just goofy like that. again, he's pretty teasing, so i'd say he's good!!

Sam - biased but he's the best flirter in the faculty by far. he's got a nice smile and a vibrant laugh and he's genuinely very friendly and open to people. good!!

Sebek Zigvolt - hes so BAD. hes only better than vargas. I KNOW THIS SOUNDS MEAN but he'd just yell compliments at you and expect you to reciprocate. has a crisis if you dont.

Silver - hes very sweet but so tired, just let him rest on your lap!!

Trey Clover - he'd be bad IM SORRY. he doesn't really flirt so he'd just be awkwardly making small talk with you until you catch on to what he's doing.

Vil Schoenheit - after that kiss in book six i think abt him more than i used to. he's a very sweet flirt, with soft smiles and pink cheeks. let vil be blushy. I NEED IT.

[nitrokiraru]

masterpost of all the times nitro+chiral has referenced their own games! made bc i was bored and i like epic nitro+chiral references

also includes references to other nitroplus games, if there are any refs i missed please feel free to add to the post or lmk and i will add them!

Togainu No Chi references

to start out is the bgm playing in slow damage! credits to this channel called L on youtube for the recording, they also uploaded other vids of n+c bgm being in surodame so shoutout to a real one bc im about to use all of their vids for this post

haunt, shifty, and tactics play in the restaurant!

this next one is not exactly confirmed to be a reference but I always felt like the re:code virus and trip ending cg was a homage to Kau

like??? THE OUTFITS LOOK KINDA SIMILAR IDK!!! i like to think that it is! and considering the fact that honyarara (dmmd artist) was a togainu no chi fan, i wouldnt be surprised if the similarities were intentional

Lamento references

to my knowledge there is not a lot of lamento refs in the other games, but like togainu no chi, lamento's bgm is also in slow damage!

kowaku, kaze ga huku machikado, and ketsui (? the last one is a lil hard to hear but it sounds like ketsui) play in the cafe!

Sweet Pool references

this reference is one i was NOT aware of at all until very recently, so credit to @/slybluehologhost for pointing it out! and for the screenshots if they are yours! their post was the one i found this out from lmao

the CG of one of the first rhyme fights in dramatical murder, is a corrupted version of the Okinaga household cg from sweet pool!

here is the original CG. if you notice it's using 3d resources, something that dmmd didn't actually have a lot of as backgrounds. the reason is because it's leftovers from the previous game!

if you look at the CG flipped, you can see clearly that it is the Okinaga household living room/kitchen!

in my opinion this is one of the coolest refs on this post. bc i played dmmd before every other n+c game, i genuinely didn't notice this when i first played. its something that only people who played sweet pool would notice, and i just find that so nice! just a lil easter egg for people who know

sweet pool bgm is also present in slow damage!

scene [warp02], chills02, and calm01 play in the bar!

another ref in slow damage is the billboard with youji official art on it

prolly my fav official art of youji ever

Dramatical Murder references

dmmd's bgm is featured in slow damage!

track 10, 12, and the video says bgm 22 but i cant rly hear anything? idk regardless the bgm plays when you go to beat up that guy who likes to get beat up by his brother for some reason LOL

another very very small reference that is extremely easy to miss is the fact that clear's nendoroid is in Mayu's room

if you zoom in on the parts i circled, you can see that the nendoroid box says 597. and nendoroid 597 just so happens to be the clear nendo!

under the cut are other nitroplus title refs! (also didnt wanna make this post look too long fndskgjn)

Other Nitroplus title references

Mayu's room is FULL of Nitroplus title references. so much that some of them I didn't really recognize besides the obvious, so i literally had to just go through the character lists on nitroplus games to find what characters they were. ur welcome for this incoming information that you may or may not have known

probably one of the most recognizable nitroplus characters in this room is saya from saya no uta, mayu has a figure of her in the middle! (theres more boxes of her but this was the most noticeable imo)

his figure display has many nitroplus characters on it

to start from the top, the one in the long maid like dress is Petrushka from Kikokugai - The Cyber Slayer

Next to her is Franco il Nero from Zoku Satsuriku no Django

i couldnt find anything for who's next to this chara, so i assume its just swimsuit versions of the character Mayu's obsessed with

Going to the 2nd row, though you can just barely see her, i found this character to be Echika from Tokyo Necro

Next (disregarding the obvious figures in between) to her are the two main characters from You and Me and Her, Aoi Mukou and Sone Miyuki!

i find it a little funny that they would put these references in because the audience for the people playing nitroplus games vs the audience playing n+c games are like VERY different but nonetheless, pretty cool!

while not a "reference" per se, sweet pool is heavily inspired by saya no uta!

this is something thats just a generally agreed fact, but i felt compelled to include it anyway because i rly love both of these vns and i love rambling abt them. theyre very similar in the ways that they both got meat n gore, and the main characters dealing with the meat n gore, and the general theme of just isolating yourself from people because of it and not exactly having a happy end. fuminori completely giving up his outside life for saya, destroying friendships n whatnot, and youji locking himself in his room and shutting out people who aren't dealing w his lil problem (makoto). the ending where saya wins and the red road ending shares some vibes imo. its all very similar even down to the soundtrack that had some of the same people working on it, and even gen urobuchi himself (writer of saya) worked on sweet pool as an advisor. so in my head its canon that these two games r brother and sister

thats pretty much it! (unless i decide to add more i swear theres probably so much im missing LMAO) thank you if you read this far ^_^

edit: check notes for other references people have added!

[stevie-petey]

hi honey <3 what was going on in steve’s head while bug was driving him home from the halloween party? :) mwah!

finally have some time to respond to this blurb because a LOT was going through that silly boys brain </3

enjoy !

"i'll drive steve home." if steve had had anything to drink, those words wouldve sobered him up immediately.

however, hes stone cold sober as you stand before him, demanding him to argue with you.

he tries. he really does, but you have that glint in your eyes that steve had quickly learned meant youd get your way, no matter what.

for such a sweet and selfless person, you could be frustratingly stubborn sometimes.

steve is about tell you to just leave him alone, this is most eye contact hes made with you since july, but then you grab his hand and it all comes crashing back to steve.

your hand still fits perfectly within his, and for a second steve swears the pads of his fingers tremor when they graze against your palm, as if theyve exhaled with relief upon your touch.

when youve dragged steve outside, the tremors in his fingertips has become so uncomfortable that he has to drop your hand. hes afraid that if he doesnt, his knees will give out. after the shitty night hes had, he cant afford to spare any more of his pride.

steve sees the disappointment on your face when he drops your hand, and he feels the familiar pang in his chest. hes disappointed you again, upset you, but he figures its time hes evened the score anyways.

you hurt him first.

"not to make this awkward, but i kinda dont know where you live." you voice from the drivers seat. your tone is light, steve can hear how much youre trying to tell him without explicitly saying so.

hes tired of everyone treating him like a fucking idiot.

"make a left up here." he responds, staring out the window. he refuses to let you see him cry. nancys words are still ringing in his ears while your perfume clouds his mind.

its all so fucking confusing.

"do you want to talk about what happened tonight-"

steve once admired your selflessness, how open you are with what you feel and how deeply you feel it. then, you closed yourself off from him. shrouded your kindness from him and masked every feeling on your pretty little face without so much of an explanation. now, after finally being confronted with one another, you want to talk about fucking feelings?

yeah, sure. steve can do that.

"why do you only ever care about me when im some kicked fucking puppy?"

steve sees you flinch from the corner of his eye and the anger hes felt ever since july vanishes. "you know thats not true."

"its not?" steve remembers the look on your face that night the two of you saw jonathan in nancys bed. itd been the first time youd shown genuine sympathy towards steve, the first time hes ever truly had your attention.

then he remembers the alley, how youd begged him to not hurt jonathan and hed let his childish anger get the better of him anyways. steve remembers grabbing you and pulling you away from the others so that you wouldnt get hurt by the cops. he had just wanted to help you, and when he told you this he knew you saw the helplessness in his eyes. your lips had trembled as you looked at steve, you had cared about him, then.

you had almost stayed that day in the alley.

but then you left steve to go run after jonathan.

and this summer, steve doesnt know what happened between you and him, but you left again.

"then explain what happened this summer." steve knows himself. he knows that if you can give him any reason, anything, then hed welcome you back into his life with warm and worn arms.

your fingers tighten around the steering wheel. your eyes scan the empty road ahead and steve already knows what youll say. "i..."

nothing. you cant tell him a single fucking thing. delirious and heartbroken, steve laughs. "yeah, whatever. some real fucking friend you were."

and thats what hurts steve the most. you were his friend, you told him this yourself. minutes before you pulled away from him, youd been telling steve how much of a good friend he was.

you knew. he had told you how much hes struggled with connecting with others. you knew, and you still left.

nancy has provoked a different kind of hurt. she doesnt know steves deepest insecurities, or how hard he tries to be good enough for her. sure, steve felt a purpose being loved by her, but she couldnt have known this.

you were different.

and steve just wants to go home.

the silence settles, heavy. you take a shaky breath and steve has to pinch the skin on his arm so he doesnt reach out to hold you. "i got scared."

he cant help it. steve turns to you, your confession surprising him. "scared?"

"yeah, scared."

and just as quickly as youve opened back up to steve, you retreat.

anger rises again. "gee, y/n. that really explains a ton."

"im sorry, steve. i really am. its just... i got scared, ive never been good at letting people in. i know it doesnt excuse my actions, and you didnt deserve any of it, but you just... you scared me."

steve understands what its like to be scared of those around you, of giving someone the power to be vulnerable around them, but after everything thats happened with nancy tonight, he finds that he doesnt care anymore what vulnerability gets him. "turn right after this light."

something changes, then. steve notices your posture straighten, your jaw clenches and your knuckles are white against the steering wheel. theres a newfound spark now, a fight within you. "look, you came crashing into my life in such a violent way, and it became the best goddamn thing that happened to me."

steves heart is pounding against his chest.

your voice shakes still. he knows, he can feel it, just how hard this is for you. "there you were, spending every day at my job just to talk to me. you asked me questions about myself and noticed things no one else had before and i just... i couldnt do it."

a pause, you look over at steve and you soften your voice, lacing it with everything hes wanted from you since july. "i missed you."

i missed you.

steve whispered those words to nancy in the hallway only yesterday, but he knows he really meant them for you.

no ones ever missed him before.

"missed?" when steve was young, he remembers asking his dad if he missed him. missed implied caring for someone at some point, but long after theyve already left. to have missed someone means to have long settled the ache that followed the hurt of leaving.

"miss. i miss you,"

something opens within steves chest. he can feel it, this expanding that slowly overtakes his body. it crawls over him, clouds his brain the same way your perfume does, and steve has to close his eyes as it settles.

he feels like a little kid again, accepting whatever his father gives him.

steve is tired.

but he sees you wipe at your eyes. your hands shake, despite your best attempts of steadying them as you drive, and steve knows he could never, ever remain angry with you.

he recognizes, suddenly, how similar the two of you are. two lonely kids trying to walk everyone home.

[magicxc]

Stork Visits

Pairings: Survey Coprs x Black Reader - do they want babies?

Word Count: 1137

Warnings: baby fever?

A/N: Here’s what I think in regard to the guys wanting babies. But tell me what you think! Is there someone who you feel would react differently than I imagined?

Headcannons Masterlist

Eren  - oh absolutely. I think he’d love to see a miniature him running around causing mayhem. He’s the obsessed dad, telling everyone you meet that you’re pregnant and watching literally everything you eat to make sure that it’s safe and healthy for the baby. Eren becomes a nutritionist, a midwife, and security guard all in one; and while you are grateful, he could definitely use a chill pill. 

Levi - I wanna say no, but he can be convinced. More of a soft no, or Levi’s idea of a soft no. He doesn’t really develop relationships or connections with others because of everyone around him dying and for that reason he’s really against the idea of raising a child. But once he finds someone special, I think he’ll view it with a different set of lens and even come to anticipate the idea of another Ackerman.

Erwin - very neutral. He isn’t actively for a child or against it. More of a if it happens, it happens kinda fella. Understand that work WILL be a priority and will often take precedence. Erwin is absolutely taking care of his family but it’ll be more in a financial sense. Although he is emotionally available as well it’s his physical presence yall will have to tussle with. However, he is making sure at the very least yall wont need for much. I'm talking a house in the best neighborhood, the best schools, the best clothes, etc. And he absolutely loves his family but when that job calls, it's toodles. 

Connie - also neutral to the idea. Connie doesn’t really take life seriously to me. I consider him to be in his playboy era lowkey. He doesn’t really live for the future, but more so the present so if you get pregnant he’ll be supportive of whatever choice you make. And if it does happen, he’s that overwhelming dad who’s plastering his child on all the socials. They’ll be in matching outfits, taking professional pictures for every milestone, and he’s stacking those presents high under the Christmas tree for the holidays. That child will have him wrapped around their finger so it's safe to say that you’ll have to be the bad cop for a good chunk of their childhood cause Connie is mostly concerned with being the cool and fun parent. 

Jean - yes!! He’s that military man that enlists straight out of high school, meets a girl, marries her two months later, and starts a family of five. Maybe even get a pet for the sake of it. Jean strikes me as very traditional in the family sense. His children will be honor students and he’s plastering his bumper sticker with all their future colleges. Their report cards get put on the fridge and while Jean does start off his parenting a little strict in the disciplinary department, he eventually learns to take it easy. 

Onyankopon - yes, but when the time is right. He wants to try and solve all the worlds problems before settling down to start a family. Soon enough he’ll realise that as much as he wants to he cant help everyone so he goes on to focus his energy on creating a life with his lover. Ony’s so adorable. Literally there at your beck and call. He’s taking you to all your doctors appointments, sitting through all your lamaze classes and designing the baby's room from scratch. Ony is the hands on father who’s spending weeks tryna figure out how to assemble the crib and he’s signing the kid up for every extracurricular activity possible as soon as they can walk - ooh and he’s never missing a practice. 

Reiner - idek with this man. I genuinely feel like the pendulum can swing either way, though I am leaning more towards no. I think Reiner carries way too much guilt to ever feel deserving of children and so he’s content to just have a wife while playing the role of cool, rich uncle. Mans is honestly just happy to be alive, and barely even that, so he’s not too interested in starting a family. He’ll babysit in a heartbeat and is sneakily feeding his nieces/nephews/godchildren ice cream for breakfast after their parents explicitly said no. He’s the one they call when they need a ride home from a party they weren't even supposed to go to and he’s providing an alibi if need be. Reiner is sliding $20 in their hands at every function and bringing them gifts from his latest excursion around the globe. While he greatly enjoys his time spent with the kiddos he loves handing them back to their parents even more; and greatly enjoys having his lover all to himself while doing things he never dreamed he’d reach the age to see and simultaneously healing the child within. 

Armin - yes!! I think Armin is gonna be the poster dad for kids lowkey. You ever meet those parents who run their household like the navy? Like in a scheduled sorta way? That’s gonna be Armin. Kids are in bed no later than 8pm. Their breakfast, lunch, and dinner will be balanced to each portion of essential nutrients based on the food groups of the plate. They're drinking 8 glasses of water a day and flavored milk yuck during snack time. Their juices are diluted with water so when they hit their first party and experience 100% juice for the first time they’re literally bouncing off the walls. I really feel like Armin would have that perfect cookie cutter type family who celebrates and decorates for every holiday. They brush their teeth before bed every night and must bathe with their special bubble bath soap or else they’ll lose their shit. He’ll raise kids you avoid in primary school lmaoo but get cool with during high school who eventually becomes a more chill version of their younger self. 

Floch - not really. He wants to run wild and sow his oats. Floch doesn't care for kids in my opinion. He’s in his selfish era which turns out to last a lot longer than he anticipated. Floch is an intelligent guy and while he enjoys practicing for a baby, he’s come to realise that he wouldn’t enjoy the responsibilities of said baby. He’s not actively in his nieces/nephews/godchildren everyday lives but instead is that uncle you only see at the family functions which is like twice a year. Once he’s there though they can ask for anything and he’s giving it to them. Money, a lil sip of beer, hell even some dating tips. He doesn't go out of his way to be present so it's really one of those you just gotta be there moments. Floch has always been on his own timing and enjoys living his best child free life. 

[miiilowo]

i feel like theres not a lot of great resources out there so i figured id just ask -- how would you recommend ways of living with/helping out someone else with npd? :)

youre right! most of the time when u look up NPD stuff its "THE ABUSER DISORDER: KNOW HOW TO RECOGNIZE IT AND DISABLE NARC DEFENSES SO THEY CANT TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU" which isnt. Great

all it really comes down to is listening to them n addressing their needs if they've communicated them to you. ill try to simplify it so i dont get too into details, though i will likely fail, and most of this advice will be based off my experiences, so idk how much itll apply to whoever ur talking about BUT:

generally (and w me especially) you can safely say that NPD mostly has to do with ego dysregulation. Our [as in myself and people w npd] mental health and general happiness tends to rely on how people perceive us, and if that perception is anything but positive, we feel like poopy doo doo dogshit. we kinda need to be paid attention to in a way that feels meaningful, yknow? compliment them, make sure theyre included in conversations (esp group ones), and try not to ignore em in any way. if youre talking to them and youre busy, for example, make sure you include that detail so they don't feel like youre brushing them aside. stuff like that. if they make art, and you genuinely like it, try going into detail as to why, whether its the colors or linework or what have you. if they write, tell them what you liked about the story or poem, etcetera. Tag them in stuff that reminds you of them if you have their socials, or send them things, show it to them, whatever.

lots of us tend to actually be very insecure, even if it doesn't seem that way, which might be important to keep in mind. sometimes we can get whats referred to as "narc crashes" (im not particularly a fan of the term narc, though theres nothing actually wrong with it, so ill just call it an NPD crash) where for whatever reason, we go from feeling great and secure in our egos and our stability and happiness and security to falling 600 feet down directly into hell no recovery absolutely awful 0% joy 0% light 100% agony. dogs with human teeth screaming at you and shit its really just no good. calling you a dunderhead

they usually (though not always!) come after a high where we feel fantastic, and most commonly the cause of a crash is we get hurt by someone, humiliated, or made to feel lesser in some significant way. for me, they're the worst when i no longer feel confident that people like me, and i become incredibly worried everybody secretly hates me. which is a very very very awful train of thought to be experiencing when you have the "EVERYBODY NEEDS TO LIKE ME NOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW" disorder. so if ur friend seems depressed or upset make sure to ask whats going on and bump up the praise and stuff up a notch. its the best way to recover for Me, at least. crashes dont have a consistent like. timeframe? i think it highly depends on the severity of what happened and whats being done to fix it, though im certainly no psychologist lmao

i feel like when folks w npd Are mean or unfair its because their needs arent being met, theyre doing awful, and they need support so they dont desperately lash out for it. god knows thats the case for me. thats another thing thats important to keep in mind i think

a lot of traits of NPD aren't pretty, and thats just a fact of the matter. its a disorder for a reason and all. even if we dont express the almost inherently negative traits all the time (usually because we are aware they are unfair to other people), its very likely that we are feeling them, and it does erode your brain after a while. The DSM-5 list of traits is probably the best way to go for this, as per this government website:

"A pervasive pattern of grandiosity (fantasy or behavior), need for admiration, and with lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood, as indicated by at least five of the following:

Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements, expects to be recognized as superior without actually completing the achievements)

Is preoccupied with fantasies of success, power, brilliance, beauty, or perfect love.

Believes that they are "special" and can only be understood by or should only associate with other special people (or institutions).[milo note: its hard for me to find something specific to make bold in this definition, but generally, i do not express that i think that i am better than other people even if i think it]

Requires excessive admiration.

Has a sense of entitlement, such as an unreasonable expectation of favorable treatment or compliance with his or her expectations.

Is exploitative and takes advantage of others to achieve their own ends.

Lacks empathy and is unwilling to identify with the needs of others.

Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of them.

Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors and attitudes."

Ive bolded the ones that would negatively affect people that, I, at least, try not to express but still feel, or feel the desire to do, near constantly.

As you can see, thats a pretty hefty chunk of them! I'm sure some people could take problem with every trait listed here, in which case they can suck my whole dick, but those are the ones I've noticed upset people the most, or make relationships the most difficult. I bring these up because if someone does express these, you need to keep in mind it is because of a personality disorder. That doesn't always make them acceptable, and if they are really upsetting, you should talk to them about it, but thats just like. basic relationship shit lmao. just try to be an eensy bit forgiving

Though the MAIN reason I wanted to bring up the traits is due to the 'entitlement/unreasonable expectation of favorable treatment/compliance' one. This can manifest in a whole lot of ways, but it is genuinely infuriating when someone ignores what i want them to do/what ive asked them to do/etc, especially if its for a reason that doesnt 'feel' solid enough, like them just not wanting to do it. it can be incredibly frustrating if someone with npd says they need something from you or want you to do xyz and it doesnt happen, so try your best to listen to them. if you cant do what they desire for whatever reason, make sure thats clear, and why. Most of us will recognize we're being unfair, but will still be mad; Just know its not because of you, its because of the disorder, and most people will not hold it against you because they're aware its unreasonable in some fashion.

i think thats like. the main things when it comes to meeting the needs of someone w NPD. to summarize and dumb it down:

make sure to compliment them in meaningful ways, especially when you really mean it

pay attention to them; try to prioritize them in conversation and such. it feels very nice. dont ignore them for the love of god

keep the crashes in mind, and try to uplift your friend as much as you can. reassure them you care about them, maybe not directly by saying "i care about you" but with your actions in general

listen to them and adapt to their needs as best as you can

remember that if they are being unpleasant its probably because of The Disorder and they are not doing well. dont let anyone be a prick to you but try to be kind. everybody goes through shit

if anyone has anything to add, or if you have any followup questions, feel free to ask ^_^ i very much didn't cover everything here, and again, this is mostly based off of my experience as someone w NPD, and everyone is different to some degree. The most important thing to do is ask about their needs, and try to adapt to them the best you can.

i think thats all i have to say for now tho so. sayanora. if i come up w anything else ill add it in an edit

[unicornsaures]

Divinity lams AU?

Alex is some divine, etheral being and John is just a pathetic and lost fallen angel who swears his devotion to this 'otherworldly being' for the privilege of following him around and being with him for eternity because it gives him a purpose. And at first, Alex just sees him as this sad soul whos's lost and doesnt know what to do and genuinely takes pity on him; but eventually it goes from a 'worshiped and worshiper' relationship to a relationship in which Alex see's him as an equal despite being nothing but.

And even before this, John had been searching for guidance through other people because he never fully trusted his instincts and yet this had only led him to be distrusting because the very reason he had 'fallen' was because he had followed anothers lead. In turn, he turned to etheral 'gods' who he knows cant do him wrong because they'll always view themselves as above him, and with pledging his devotion, they cant turn on him because he will forever be their faithful subject.

Unfortunately for John his devotion borders more on obsession. He loves looking up to see someone so majestic staring back down at him with such a soft smile in contrast to piercing eyes and to know Alex would be looking at him makes his heart flutter and insides melt and skin on In fire(figuratively..) and makes him just want to cut off his wings and give them to Alex as a sign of his true adoration he holds for him. And obviously this concerns Alex. I mean, his poor devotee is willing to do anything for him but theres a line, right? Alex still cares for him of course, what kind of being would he be if he allowed someone to sacrifice their own peace for him?

Cue emotional outburst number one! John would be rambling softly about how if he had the strength he would just rip out his wings and alex has to lean down and gently rest his palm on John's cheek to tell him not to ruin his beautiful wings and that being with him is devotion enough for him and that physical pain in his name would only cause harm. And then tears, of course, in natural angst fashion.

Oh, and John has an immense fear of corrupting Alex the entire time due to the fact hes a 'sinner' (by his own standards) and being in the presence of such divinity as a 'corrupted being' puts Alex at risk to fall from his stance of power. But even despite his fear he can't leave not only due to this eternal soul-binding agreement, but because being in his presence makes him feel alive and as though he can feel love again even after he had failed in doing so for so many years. But in the end Alex doesnt see himself as higher or with more power but as an equal.

John would have 'given up' his ability to feel love for another in order to be fully devoted to Alex, and yet he was convinced he didnt have it in the first place so he decided he wouldnt be giving it up if he never had it. But in turn he discovered that he did have the ability to love, but it had to be discovered through giving up the ability to love anyone other than Alex, and in a way hes happier with that.

But even so, John doesnt think hes worthy enough to be so close to someone so much better than he is, and he does view it as a privilege to be there until Alex tells him to stand up in which he physically has to look down at alex(he would stand at other points, of course, but he would never physically look down. If alex would speak to him he would physically attempt to lower his height to keep Alex above him by his own personal will.) But that is the point where he would cup johns face and then tell him that he's wonderful and the most faithful devotee hes had the 'honor' of being with and then tears. so many tears. so many pent up tears form years john has been telling himself that he cant feel love and to even be in the vicinity of Alex is a privilege that he doesnt deserve just to be told to his face that this divine being loves him and appreciates everything hes done and he doesnt want John to be hurt for him.