#if the other giants are wrong in the end just chop off some giants head

[thatfrenchacademic]

I was chatting with a (slightly more) senior academic about writing our respective academic monographs (Hers: published, successful. Mine : WIP).

On the topic of the literature review, I mentioned how uncomfortable I was, during my PhD, with how aggressive I had to be with previous works, to justify the existence of mine. "Find the gap" often felt like "Hammer down until there is a gap". It's nice to be beyond that, I told her, to frame my research as building on previous literature, accepting that academia is collaborative.

"I can't pretend I am not standing on the shoulders of giants" I said.

She nodded, and gently but firmly answered:

"That's true. But now, you are the giant too. You know that, right?"

And that shit has been living in my head 24/7 ever since, and it's going to be what I say to every single young academic doubting themselves ever.

You ARE standing on the shoulders of giants, and you ARE a giant.

[daisykihannie]

can i request yunho for #97 and jongho for #8 pls? 🫶🏻

97.) They want cuddles but you hate skinship

Pairing: Yunho x Reader

Warnings: Fluff

“Jagi~” you could hear your boyfriend whining as he walked down the hallway from his office to where you were currently, sprawled out on the couch in your living room. “Jagiiyyyaaaaa!” he whined again when you didn’t respond. You hummed in acknowledgment but continued scrolling on tiktok, not moving or looking away from the screen. “Baby?” he called out softly while standing by the foot of the couch now. You could only see where he was from the corner of your eye.

“Yes my love?” you asked and finally looked away from your phone to make eye contact with him. He had a huge pout on his lips and he was giving you wet puppy dog eyes. He stuck both his arms out straight in front of his body, towards you, and made grabby hands. “Can we pleeeaaassseeee cuddle? Just for a little bit?” he whined again, not dropping the kicked puppy act.

He was well aware that you weren’t a fan of skin ship, otherwise he probably would’ve already flopped onto the couch and caged your body under his full weight. “Is something wrong baby?” you asked and turned off your phone, placing it on the coffee table so that you could give Yunho your full attention.

He nodded, still pouting, but didn’t offer up more of an explanation than that. He’s a softy with an affinity for physical affection. Odd how someone with a love language of physical touch ended up with someone who’d rather chop their foot off with a rusty butter knife than cuddle. It’s not that you necessarily HATED skinship but you could easily list a million other ways you’d rather show your affection and love than that.

You let out a sigh when your giant puppy of a boyfriend didn’t continue further with what had him so upset and opened your arms, inviting him to cling to you. The pout and puppy dog eyes were instantly replaced with the biggest smile you’d ever seen, so big it turned his eyes into tiny crescent shapes. He wasted no time in flopping his body onto your smaller one and letting himself become dead weight on top of you.

You let out a huff when the wind was punched from your lungs but recovered quickly, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders. He slid his hands under your shoulders and used his hands to grab the top of them, clinging to you contently. He pushed his cheek into your chest and let out a sigh of relief, at this angle you were able to plant a soft peck to the top of his head and take a moment to enjoy his scent.

“How does your hair always smell so good even after working all day?” you mumble into his hair, slightly tickling his scalp and he erupted into soft giggles at the feeling. “I guess I just have some really good shampoo and conditioner.” he beamed in response, allowing himself to relax and get lost in your hold. You two stayed like this for a while, just enjoying each others company. You may hate skinship but it’s worth it to see your boyfriend so at peace and happy.

To him, your touch was healing and is the only thing able to wash away all the stress and frustration he feels on a daily basis, especially with tours and comebacks. It all tends to get overwhelming to him and being held by you is like pushing a reset button, wiping his mind and filling his chest with that warm feeling of love and adoration he gets knowing that you’re doing this for him. That even with you not enjoying cuddles and skinship like he does, you push your distaste aside for him because you love him that much.

“So, now that you’re more relaxed, can you tell me what’s wrong?” you ask softly, your hold loosing ever so slightly. You hear him whine and feel his grip on your shoulders tighten before he speaks. “Only if we can stay like this while I talk. Just a little longer, please?” his voice is muffled by where he’d pushed his face into your chest in his own way to keep you from letting go.

“Okay, we can stay like this. I won’t let go until you’re ready for me to. I promise.” your tone was reassuring and comforting. Yunho could feel his heart skip a beat and tears began to sting the corners of his eyes. These are the moments that truly cement Yunho’s desire to marry you one day.

[bethanythebogwitch]

Wet Beast Wednesday: ocean sunfish

Everybody knows ocean sunfish, right? Those giant, slow, silly-looking, parasite-ridden morons that eat jellyfish and can't defend themselves from predators really are the worst fish right?

(GIF: Lex Luthor screaming "WRONG!" from the movie Superman Returns)

First of all there's no such thing as a "best" or "worst" animal and judging animals by human standards of what is cool or successful is silly because our standards are not even universal among humans, let along other species. Secondly, the closest thing we have to a way to judge a species is how successful it is in its niche and sunfish are doing pretty good, thank you very much. Today I'll be talking about sunfish and how they are not bad fish at all.

(Image: a Mola mola located near the surface of the ocean, with the tip of its dorsal fin and part of its head breaching the surface. It is a round fish with no tail, only a wrinkly region of its body. Its dorsal and anal fins are long and slender The eyes and mouth are proportionately small. It is a pale white with light grey spots. A SCUBA diver is visible in the background. End ID)

Ocean sunfish, or molas, are members of the family Molidae, which is divided into five known species across three genuses. Im mostly going to be talking about members of the genus Mola, but I'll mention the other two as well. Molas are known for their size and odd appearances, looking like someone chopped a fish in half and the front half went swimming off on its own. They are members of the order Tetraodontiformes, making them cousins to pufferfish, triggerfish, boxfish, and others. While many members of that order are known to be highly poisonous, molas are not. They also lack several other common traits. Despite being bony fish, most of the mola skeleton is made of cartilage and they do not have swim bladders, forcing them to actively swim to maintain their position in the water column. Instead of a tail and caudal fin, sunfish have a structure called the clavus. The clavus is formed mostly from connective tissue and is used as a rudder. Because the clavus is mostly made of connective tissue, damage to it is not particularly harmful to the fish. There have been molas found alive and well that have had portions of their clavus eaten by predators. Because of their shortened stature, molas have the fewest vertebrae of all fish. The dorsal and anal fins are elongated and are used to provide propulsion by flapping back and fourth similarly to how birds wings move, albeit slower. Minute alterations in the angle each fin moves through the water help with steering, while more sharp turns are aided with jets of water ejected through the mouth and gills. Like their other Tetraodintid relatives, mola teeth are fused together into a beak-like structure that prevents them from closing their mouths. They also have some more regular pharyngeal teeth in the backs of their mouths. Some reports say that the fish can make noises by grinding the pharyngeal teeth together. Mola skin is thick and rough, described as being similar to sandpaper in texture. Like most fish, the skin is covered in a layer of protective mucus.

(Image: a mola sunbathing. It is positioned with one side of its body facing the surface. Its body is just under the water's surface. End ID)

The three species in the genus Mola are Mola mola, the ocean sunfish and most well-known of the molas, Mola alexandrini, the giant, southern, or bumphead mola, and Mola tecta, the hoodwinker sunfish. Mola mola has an average weight of 247 to 1000 kg (545 to 2205 lbs), mouth to clavus length of 1.8 m (5.9 ft) and dorsal to anal fin length of 2.5 m (8.2 ft), though some individuals can get much large. The largest individual on record had a length of 3.3 m (10.8 ft), height of 3.2 m (10.5 ft) and weighed 2300 kg (5100 lbs). M. alexandrini is the largest of the species. The largest known southern sunfish measured in at 2744 kg (6049 lbs) and 3.25 m (10.66 ft) from mouth to clavus, making it the largest known bony fish in the world. They can be distinguished from M. mola by the presence of bumps on the forehead and chin, a more rounded clavus, and differently-shaped scales. M. tecta is known as the hoodwinker sunfish because it was long mistaken for one of the other two species and was only identified as a separate species in 2015 after the body of one washed up in Christchurch, Aotearoa/New Zealand and was examined by scientists. Because it has only recently been discovered, little is known about this species. They appear to have the same range of sizes and weights of the other two species and can be distinguished by a slimmer body shape and a smooth clavus. All three species are found in tropical and temperate waters worldwide, though M. alexandrini and M. tecta are more commonly found in the southern hemisphere.

(Image: a Mola alexandrini underwater. It is distinguishable from Mola mola by the two bumps above and below its facial region, making it look lumpy. It is surrounded by striped cleaner fish. A SCUBA diver is in the background. End ID)

(Image: a Mola tecta seen from the side. It is smoother than the other two species. More of its body is grey with white spots. End ID)

Molas are open-ocean dwellers that live life in the slow lane. For a long time, it was believed they were moved around by ocean currents they could not swim against, making them plankton. We now know they not only can swim against the current, they are capable of bursts of speed fast enough to breach the water's surface and briefly go airborne. Sunfish are named for their habit of basking at the surface of the water. It was formerly believed they spent most of their time at the surface, but thanks to tagging, we know they make frequent dives into the deep ocean. They likely bask at the surface to warm up between dives. You may not expect something as slow as a sunfish to be a predator, but they are. Much of their diet consists of gelatinous animals including jellyfish, siphonophores, ctenophores, and salps, though they will also eat small fish, fish larvae, squids, crustaceans, and even seagrass. Because they can't chew, sunfish move prey into and out of their mouth by rapidly switching between sucking water in and spitting it out in order to shred the prey into pieces small enough to swallow. Special mucus lining the digestive system may protect the molas from the stinging tentacles of their prey. Molas and other jellyfish-eaters like the leatherback sea turtle play an important role in the ecosystem by keeping jellyfish populations down. Jellyfish are not particularly nutritious, so the sunfish need to eat a lot of them to survive, something they seem to be pretty good at. Being slow and having a very low-energy lifestyle helps the fish survive on a less-nutritious diet, making them very energy efficient. One thing molas get a lot of flack for online is having lots of parasites (with up to 40 known species). This doesn't really make sense. Every species has parasites. An animal in the wild that doesn't have parasites is vanishingly rare. Having parasites doesn't make an animal suck, it makes them ordinary. Because of their parasite load, molas are frequent visitors to cleaner fish, who will eat their parasites. Molas will also let seabirds land on them and eat their parasites while they rest on the surface. The molas attract birds by splashing at the surface. Adult molas have few natural predators, but are hunted by sharks, sea lions, and orcas. Interestingly, sea lions have been known to kill molas apparently for sport, ripping off the fins and then leaving the mola to die.

(Image: a mola seen from the front. Multiple smaller fish are picking parasites off of its skin. End ID)

Molas are broadcast spawners who release their gametes into the water alongside each other. A female mola can release 300 million eggs at a time, more than any other vertebrate. Newly hatched sunfish are 2.5 millimeters long and are often cited as having the largest discrepancy in size between juvenile and adult of any vertebrate. An adult mola can be 60 millions times the weight of a larva. The larvae look very different than adult, lacking their dorsal and anal fins but having pufferfish-like spines. Juveniles school together for protection and become solitary as they age. The diet of the fish varies as they age, with younger fish feeding more on squid, worms, crustaceans, and fish but becoming more reliant on jellyfish and other gelatinous prey as they age. We don't know the growth rate of molas, but a juvenile in the Monterey Bay Aquarium grew from 26 to 339 kg (57 to 880 lbs) in 15 months, suggesting they grow rapidly. The maximum age of molas is unknown, though individuals in captivity have lives for up to 10 years.

(Image: a mola larva. It is a brown ball with large, black eyes and no visible fins. It is covered in transparent, conical spines. End ID)

The two non-Mola sunfish are Ranzania laevis, the slender sunfish and Masturus lanceolatus, the sharptail sunfish. Both are alone in the genuses, but other species are suspected. I also found references to other species in Masturus, but could find literally no information about them other than that Masturus oxyuropterus is listed in some records. The sharptail sunfish looks very similar to Mola mola and reaches similar sizes, but its clavus has an extension that looks like a short tail. They were initially believed to be deformed molas before being recognized as a separate species. Unlike molas, sharptail sunfish are rarely seen at the surface, preferring to stay in deeper water. The slender sunfish is the smallest of the family, reaching up to a meter long. While we don't know much about them, we know their diet includes a lot of fast-moving squid, indicating they can move faster than their much larger relatives.

(Image: a sharptail sunfish lying on a blue tarp. It looks similar to a Mola mola , but with black clavus and fins. At the back of the clavus is a triangular extension. End ID)

(Image: a person holding a slender sunfish. The fish is small enough to be held and has a longer and skinnier body than other sunfish. Its body is a shiny silver with blue lines. End ID)

Mola mola is classified as vulnerable by the IUCN while the other species are classed as either data deficient or least concern. Molas are vulnerable to strikes by boats and bycatch. Another danger to them is plastic bags, which can easily be ingested after being mistaken for a jellyfish. The bags can suffocate the fish or block their digestive tracts. Despite their size, molas are docile and not dangerous to humans. I found one example of a mola harming a human and it happened when the fish jumped out of the water and landed on a boat. Allegedly, some fish have learned to recognize and approach SCUBA divers. Molas are difficult to keep in captivity due to their size, the amount of space the need, and special feeding needs, so only a few aquariums have them. Molas are captured for food, with the biggest markets being in Taiwan and Japan, where they are often called mambos.

(Image: a SCUBA diver attempting to hand feed a small mola. End ID)

[sylvies-kablooie]

just getting some thoughts re:loki s2 off of my chest

i think anytime you LOVE s1 of a show getting a second season can be a terrifying thing that almost always leads to disappointment. but i guess my biggest problem with s2 is the lack of follow up on certain things…?

what’s the deal with brad? what’s the deal with him escaping to the sacred timeline and being a movie star? is that genuinely all he wants and he’s just a giant jerk because that’s the way he is? what’s his relationship w dox?

what’s the deal with dox? what was her motivation for pruning all of those branches? what was the motivation for the TVA workers she recruited to go along with her? why was she willing to betray and die for the TVA?

what’s the deal with ravonna? last season we learned she was a school principal on the sacred timeline. now we learn she was kang’s general. why did she want to stabilize the timeline but refuse to cooperate with our heroes? what is it she wants beyond being the head of the TVA? why is she so willing to toss everything she had with mobius aside? what’s the implication of miss minutes saying they never needed him at all?

what’s the deal with victor? we get to meet this HWR variant and then… we see him die? we see him beg for his life and plead to get the autonomy he would have been denied and then… spaghetti? i liked seeing him prove his valor, but don’t you think there could have been more to explore? we see miss minutes say he will never be him but then don’t get to explore what that would mean?

what’s the deal with loki? why can’t he see beyond the TVA? he wants to keep the world safe but when sylvie asked do you care about anything BUT the TVA… was she really wrong? why are they rehashing the fight from the end of s1 instead of saying what they mean? why does he have the nerve to call sylvie selfish? why can’t he tell her he cares?

you see how there’s a lot of stuff that i would like to be resolved but with only one episode left i can predict about half of these will be on the chopping block, a quarter will be addressed, and the other quarter resolved in another MCU film or show you have to do homework to enjoy?

granted!!! an episode can change a lot and maybe they can answer all of these things within that timeframe. but i have Many Questions and few answers.

[blackjackkent]

Good news, everyone! There are TWO Spectators in the House of Hope dungeon, not just one.

No sign of Raphael yet but probably only a matter of time.

First order of business is to get Hope out of her chains.

The chains are anchored on giant crystals on each side of the arena, which possibly we could also destroy, but the hammer comes with a unique attack, "Unshackling Strike", which says "Smite the magical bonds keeping a a creature restrained, paralyzed, or stunned, freeing it." So we just need to get into melee with Hope and smack her with it.

I loaded Jaheira up with the hammer since she's the one of us least dependent on weapon attacks; unfortunately she's also the slowest of us so it took two turns during which I had everyone else start clearing the room.

The spectators, as usual, are scary as fuck and have 3 billion attacks; the most concerning bit was that one of them managed to land a paralyzing ray on Jaheira, which puts her out of commission temporarily. Unclear if this was deliberate because she had the hammer or just unlucky.

However! Hector has a freedom of movement potion, and we have Magic Pockets(tm) meaning Minsc could throw it on Jaheira before her turn. TEAMWORK! STRATEGY! I'm SO GOOD at this VIDEO GAME!

(Not really, but I try. XD Throwing the potion apparently doesn't work if you're ALREADY paralyzed, which is fucked up. >:( )

I think their target must not have been random, because they KEPT doing this to Jaheira, forcing us to kill them before we could cut Hope free. A surprisingly scary bit of this ended up being maneuvering everyone so they wouldn't get yeeted into the abyss by the knockback on the imps' eldritch blasts. (I did have to do a reload for this because Karlach got knocked off; I considered a feelsy drabble about it but it didn't really feel like it served any greater character point beyond "oh, whoops, shouldn't have stood there." XD )

The reload went much better; I was able to get Jaheira over to Hope and hit her, at which point absolutely nothing happened. >:( So I guess we were supposed to go for the crystals after all.

At this point I just got annoyed and beat everything up before trying to continue. XD This had the added benefit of letting us short rest and heal up before actually cutting Hope free.

Strike one.

Strike two. And she's out!

"FREE! I never thought I would be, believed I could be, hoped I might be. HEADS WILL ROLL!" she crows, waving her arms around. Then her face falls sharply and along with it, her voice.

"But we must address the hollyphant in the room. I can see how you avoid looking at me. I must be so terribly mutilated after all these decades of torture. Don't hold back. Tell me how bad it is."

Her head bows, her shoulders hunch.

Hector looks at her with some bemusement. "You look perfectly normal," he says, because she does - really more normal than one would expect under the circumstances.

She smiles weakly. "We both know that's not true, but thank you for being so kind."

He blinks. "No, really... you look fine."

The smile strengthens, but turns all the sadder for it. "You truly are the kindest fool I've ever met..." she murmurs. A pause, and then she turns away sharply. "We'll carve our way to the entrance hall and chop Raphael into messes! That's the hopeful version of course. The likely version is that WE ARE THE MESSES AND HE IS THE CHOPPER! ONWARD!"

-----

Hector and the others watch her leap back to the platform where they came in, and all of them look more than a little troubled.

"What's she talking about, Hec?" Karlach asks in a low voice. "She looks fine."

"I don't know," Hector answers grimly. "I'm more than a little concerned that perhaps she doesn't at all. It wouldn't be the first thing we encountered here disguised under a glamour."

The deep red of her face pales slightly. "Oh. Oh gods..."

"I hope I'm wrong. Gods, I hope I'm wrong."

[dalekofchaos]

Bret Hart on what's wrong with wrestling today

"I went to a show not too long ago in Cardiff, a pay-per-view, it was embarrassing to sit in the front row and watch all the kids in the audience slap their leg as the wrestlers slap their leg in these kick spots where they pretend to kick each other with shin pads and slap sounds over and over. To realize that the crowd is in on it, the entire floor is clapping and slapping their leg. I'm going, 'we used to try and make it real, what happened?' Everybody is in on it. It's a big giant charade. I had a hard time feeling the fan part of me come to life. When I watched Dungeon Wrestling and I'm watching this young girl [Zoe Sager] wrestling, just watching her take someone over in a headlock and having a real headlock on was so much more than anything I saw in Cardiff with the wrestlers over there. It goes back to simple art. Wrestling is an art form. 'All art is simple.' Wrestling is a simple art that is really just storytelling or good vs. bad, most of the time, anyway, and it's an easy story to tell. Wrestlers have been doing it for decades and wrestlers from 2005 up don't know anything about telling stories or what headlocks are,"

When I see wrestlers today just slapping and the crowd going, 'wooo' and everyone keeps slapping, one after another and these guys have welts all over their chest and blisters and their chest hurt that night and they go, 'Geez, I was an idiot tonight and let somebody slap me on the chest as hard as he could 500 times and my chest is killing me.' That's what they used to do to the jabronies back in the old days, they would chop them, beat them, and slap them. I would never let a guy slap me and chop me. Ric Flair is the only guy that ever chopped me. He usually got to me in the end where I would tell Ric, 'you can give me one chop in the match to get it over with,' but as far as the match goes, I'm not going to sit there and stick my chest out for some guy to slap me on the chest for an hour. That's not what wrestling is. It's not about hurting yourself. It's not about coming back to the dressing room and feeling…everyone knows that it's not real, right? They all know what's going on. So why are you letting someone slap you and chop you and whip you across the chest and hurt you and you're in pain all night and you wake up the next day with blisters all over your chest and then do it again the next night. It's just stupid."

“The old kind of wrestling is sorely missed by a lot of people. If the old wrestling was around, like my dad’s wrestling, we’d come see it. I’m trying to advise my son Dallas and help him deliver the kind of wrestling show that I would enjoy watching where the wrestlers actually know what a headlock is rather than doing the scripted ballet and leaping, twirling, and dancing around like a bunch of ballet dancers. I don’t really enjoy today’s wrestling for those reasons. They’ve lost a lot of steps towards the reality and credibility of wrestling.

Wrestling, in my opinion, needs to pretend to be real. It always has pretended really hard, almost to the point that you believe it is real. Wrestling is so far fetched today. When I think of WWE and see 20 wrestlers crowded together outside on the floor and someone dives over the top rope and knocks them all down like bowling pins, I roll my eyes at how pathetic wrestling is today. Top to bottom, all the top wrestlers and all the middle bottom wrestlers in WWE and AEW, all slapping their leg on every punch and slap. It’s to the point where I can’t watch wrestling today. Sadly, it’s getting too phony. I really question the direction that the people that are in charge are taking wrestling. AEW has gone in a bad direction with all the violence and gore. I watched an episode, Dr. Martha Hart doing her big press conference, I’m watching AEW and [Jon Moxley] is sticking a fork in somebody’s head for five minutes with a close-up. This isn’t wrestling. I would recommend turning all that off and not watching because it’s not very good. Wrestling is going in bad directions because people don’t know what wrestling is or was.

It’s the people in charge that I question, and I’m not sure who is in charge anymore, especially in WWE, you never know who is in charge from one day to the next. It seems to me that somebody is not paying attention to the details. Back in my day, there was Chief Jay Strongbow, Pat Patterson, Jack Lanza, who knew exactly what needed to be done and knew the orders to carry out from Vince (McMahon) each night. There was a better understanding. When you came back after a match, Chief Jay would say, ‘Don’t do this anymore, don’t do that, change this.’ It was always the best advice and people who knew what they were talking about. I don’t think that’s happening today.

I think the people talking to the young wrestlers have absolutely zero idea of how wrestling is. They are all guys who never made it in wrestling and none of them ever had any ideas. I don’t know who is doing the thinking anymore, but someone needs to fire everybody that’s in charge in both companies, in all companies. They lack credibility, they are not believable, and the 1980s wrestling was 100 times better than the wrestling today. The best professional wrestling needs to pretend to be real, when it stops pretending to be real, which is all of what they’re doing today, it’s ridiculous.”

[ithisatanytime]

中山美穂　WAKUWAKUさせて　【1986】

did you watch the jerry springer episode? oh of course not... lets see here *thumbs through papers* elon musk is a fag... thats not it *thumbs more* how come there are no black people in holocaust movies despite supposedly being holocausted by the millions and being in every other historical period peace despite all reason? thats a good one but no.. *thumbs through papers* ah here it is! bill burr is a fucking FAGGOT, hes the worst kind of fag, bald red heads are like perfect goy stock, and while bill isnt a soy boy he spiritually is exactly the same as one, boomers and soy boys are spiritually inseparable. google a picture of bill burrs black daughter, you wont find a straight up picture of her face, and do you know why? because she is FULL fucking black, 110 percent black, nothing wrong with that, but shes direct physical evidence that bill burr was cuckolded (for real) by his giant black wife. she literally filmed it, shes a director and she directed a movie where a giant black guy fucks her around the time she somehow conceived a full black daughter with bill burr. bill burr is representative of everything wrong with men now, there are tenants to being a man, rules to follow, one is dont complain, another is handle your fucking business, the problem comes when cowards hide behind the first rule and neglect the second, this is what bill burr, male feminists, and all boomers do. “i just wanna grill” while jews set this fags kids up to chop their dicks off and get literally raped, i dont care if its harsh thats what they are doing, and they will be remembered as the lowest of lowly cowards for all of time, you see how im complaining right now but towards the end of handling my fucking business? if you dont fantasize about tearing jew guts with your very own fingers, you are not a man!

 also i briefly went back on twitter to see if elon made good on his word (this was about a day before ye exposed him for the coward that he really is) and what i found most telling were the people i followed whos tweets i could still see. people like owen benjamin, i have a lot of distrust for anyones twitter i can still fucking see some 3 years on after i got banned and it should be obvious why.

[saviorfoxowlis]

N:Era: Where We Lie Part 2: As Seen On TV

Rosod explained, "Credit cards have a magnetic strip, you stooges, and are highly traceable. Owlis will know Cyras purchased 200 Drakold worth of ice cream if she looks at her bank transactions."

Cyras asked, "How do we stop the river transactions?"

"Wrong type of bank, and I don't know, do I look like a banker? Let's just say Ahmond is already done for."

Ahmond whined, "They're right, Cyras."

"No," Cyras half-shouted, "I'm sure that I can erase this information when I'm at the palace. I know some people. Wink wink, nudge nudge." Cyras playfully bumped her flank.

Ahmond's expression softened. "Thanks, Cyras, you're a good friend."

Cyras thought, how am I gonna do that? I don't even know how these credit cards work, much less erasing transaction history.

Owlis had books for holding records. The transaction history must appear in some type of book.

While she thought, Ahmond got a bag of loot around her waist, carried by a thin strap of leather. Cyras remembered Civics called the straps "belts".

The two departed for Lavandar, the empire's capital, with Ahmond having a bag of loot on a belt around her waist. At some point in Sunnyvilla, they'd see a flash and be walking down well-maintained streets. Tall and sophisticated lined neatly with each other, with various arches highlighting the next part of their destination. In the distance, visible throughout the city, stood the palace.

Cyras saw these mysterious flashes many times, but Ahmond finally explained how there was an entire system of teleporters throughout Wysdom for easy transportation from a kingdom to the capital.

Ahmond said, "I'm not sure how this all works, but Rosod told me they have some psychic coding. This is known as the Telehighway."

"Okay."

The girls arrived at the lawn of Owlis' palace. The giant purple structure fused elegance with sheer power. Vines dangled from balconies covered with plant life and exotic flowers. Banners patriotically displayed the coat of arms of Wysdom, a shield with a rainbow winged peryton in the center. Despite the age, periodically architects retouched with paint, keeping the place an architectural juggernaut.

Cyras came around the back as the garden was her favorite part. Not just because she was used to the outdoors, but because of rows and rows of weird vegetables. She plucked a carrot and bit down.

Ahmond winced as she heard the crunch. "You really should wash those first."

"Carrots are root vegetables. Roots go in the ground."

"Yes, but, that's gross."

Cyras shrugged as she came through the back door into the kitchen area. A brown wolf chopped potatoes.

Ahmond snuck a quick look at the butler.

Acknowledging her glance, Cyras said, "That's Cacao."

Ahmond asked Cyras, "How many workers are here?"

"Lots. Fifty."

The girls walked the stairs. Cyras, being in the prime of her life, made her way up quickly. Erstwhile, Ahmond, being athletically unendeavored, chugged.

Cyras pushed a double door with her head, welcoming a draft as she stepped out. There were two major towers on either the west or the east ends, both ringed by balconies. Columns linked the floor with the overhang.

Ahmond leaned over the small fence, and sprung back, her eyes bulging.

"Cyras, we're, 20, 30… 40 million feet above ground."

"Yup. My room is even higher up at the very tippy top of the tower," Cyras said while standing on her hind legs with her paw up as if she was patting the roof.

Ahmond whispered, "Oh that's horrifying. I can't go up there."

"Good, I wasn't inviting you."

"Hallo, girls," said a tall purple fox who walked towards them. Owlis' hazel eyes stared Ahmond down.

Tail flickering, Cyras knew the next crucial steps relied on what knowledge she could ascertain within this talk.

"Good news, Empress Owlis," Ahmond stammered, "I have enough money, that I can pay you off."

"Oh really?"

"200 Drakold." A shaky paw handed over the burlap sack.

"Tell me how you obtained all this money."

"Well you see, we have some investors." She stared at her paws. "and because summer is coming, our business is actually picking up-"

Owlis picked Ahmond up by the throat and shoved her against a column. Cyras gasped. "You listen here and you listen good you little PUNK. For your little scheme, I should skin you alive, boil you, and drain your fat for making rose-scented candles! I have never been this disrespected by a mere plebeian as you attempted in the past fifty years!"

Cyras bit on Owlis' tail and yanked, but wasn't pulling her away.

Ahmond choked out, "How did you know already?"

"I have a treasurer, genius, I guess they didn't put that in your daily almanac subscription. Anytime someone pays for anything more than 30 Drakold at a time on my bank account, I get an alert. In this case, several. You manipulated, maliciously, with scamming aforethought, my Wildborn cousin into buying 200 Drakold of ice cream. And I really doubt any of your stock is worth that." Owlis dropped Ahmond on her tail.

Cyras kept tugging and Ahmond wheezed. "I'll get the money, I swear!"

"You better, because for this little stunt, I will break you into pieces like a cheap set of plastic trademarked bricks."

Cyras charged Owlis. One hand got her nape and another her gut. The alpha flipped her, dropped her on concrete on her tailbone.

The spine compressed like an accordion but speed was the game. Cyras dropped on her back and bucked at Owlis' jaw.

The experienced fox slapped her feet away and when the younger followed with an uppercut, she replied with a headbutt.

A crack sounded. Cyras sucked on her now reddened knuckles and glared at the Empress.

"Since you two seemingly possess no other past times than angering me, you will both be passing out invitations for Cyras' birthday party. Perhaps that will keep you little fellas busy." Or maybe she said felons with an accent. Whispering, the alpha said, "I'm seriously gonna turn that little girl into a hat," as she walked away.

As Owlis left earshot, Ahmond began whimpering. "What am I going to do?" She grabbed Cyras' shoulders and began shaking the startled fox, "she will end me!"

Cyras smacked Ahmond with a fiery paw, some spit and stupid flying a few inches.

"Thanks," she said as she rubbed her cheek until Cyras launched an onslaught of many fiery slaps. The Karma slaps. A hundred slaps were dealt within exactly two blinks of the eye. Hopefully, Ahmond would think twice before shaking her ever again.

"Ow, my cheeks."

"Well, if we are preserving the other pair, I have a plan," Cyras told her. "On each paper, let's put an advertisement saying, 'get ice cream at Ahmond's Shop'."

"Our shop is called Freezer's."

Everyone called the shop Ahmond's shop. Cyras tilted her head but she only hung out with other kids. Maybe if she was with adults, she would hear the eatery be called Mosor's Malts, Vanos' Vanillas, or Kyofi's Krazy Kreams.

Ahmond said, "I guess passing out advertisements would be a good idea because Owlis has given me until 26:00 on Twiday night."

"That would be Woeday night at that point."

"Um, yeah, whatever, and we'll pass the flyers out for all of our friends."

Cyras said, "You have to do most of the writing." While Ryvoh made sure Cyras knew how to read while training her in the Wilds, she never taught writing, so if Cyras ever wrote anything she did so with painterly penmanship. AKA, horribly.

"Sure."

Both agreed this would be best if they conducted their business in the dining room. Cyras went to her room and brought the bag of little paper slips downstairs.

Hundreds of invitations became several thousand words, that Ahmond worked through with progressing injury. The coywolf learned about the exciting world of carpal tunnel.

So when they began the trek back to the ice cream shop, Cyras bounced down the streets, whilst Ahmond limped on three paws. "Ow, ow, ow."

A Violet approached them. He looked like the one from the shop they bought the lie detectors at except a bit lankier. Rubbing his scaly hands together, he said, "Excuse me, hello."

Cyras bristled her fur as she put herself slightly in front of Ahmond. "Hello."

"I saw you two girls. You see, there's a camera in my brother's shop and he works at the mall, and I heard, well you see, I invented these things, these devices known as lie detectors, and-" He gesticulated wildly, pointing at everything he was describing. "Well, I was noticing, that you two had, bought an awful lot of my machines. And that's lots of money-"

"Listen, I only bought them because unless Ahmond pays off her loan, my cousin Owlis will make her cry."

Ahmond whined.

"Like that. We didn't care about your product and just used you." Cyras gave him a shooing gesture. "Now remove yourself."

Daybreak took a step back.

Cousin, Daybreak thought as her brush brushed him past. He squinted, and realized that fox must have been Cyras, the new cousin of Owlis who was found and rescued from the Wilds.

If the cousin of Owlis bought the products, then, logic went that meant what was good enough for the Empress' cousin must be good enough for everyone else. Suddenly, marketing jingles rang in his head.

A smirk ran across his wide mouth.

Several days later, Ahmond said, "I really don't think we're getting more visitors."

Rosod spooned a mouthful of ice cream. "Well tweedledee and tweedledum, have you ever thought about the fact that anyone you two would be inviting are your friends? And how any friends you have already know about the ice cream shop?"

Cyras said, "Out of interest, Rosod, do you think you're helping, or are you just a jerk?"

"I'm not just a jerk, I'm a smart jerk, toots." She clucked and cracked her knuckles with her thumbs, then cracked either thumb knuckle with the middle and index fingers.

Lilu spooned at a mountain posing as ice cream. A few scoops of vanilla atop a slice of cheesecake, atop a chocolate bar base. And several cherries helped form the mouth.

Rosod said, "You know, just because your mom says you're fat doesn't mean you should make eat yourself sick to spite her."

Lilu's voice feigned interest. "Oh, then tell me what I should do."

"Personally, I start my mornings by having a nice bowl of oatmeal with raisins and a banana. Along with that, I have five milliliters of apple juice, because anything over is excessive with all the sugars. During lunch, I may have a sprig of broccoli, which I put in my fruit salad, as that provides protein in my diet. For dinner, you actually shouldn't eat because you're going to sleep soon, therefore I typically only have a few carrots for snacking-"

"Rosod, I should punch you in the face. That is literally the most upper-class crimson thing I have ever heard. Yesterday, I pounded back a steak, some mashed potatoes, some peas, a bowl of gravy, and a stick of licorice. Cyras, tell her what real food is."

Cyras said, "Well yesterday, I had some carrots, some potatoes, a few gingerbread cookies, a few chicken nuggets, a few slices of pizza. And then I had some mushroom soup. Then for lunch-"

A commercial came on the corner television, catching Cyras' eyes as she recognized the Violet.

"Oh there's an idea, you could do a commercial," Lilu said.

However, the commercial showed the Violet with his product. "Did you know that a study showed two complete strangers will, within a ten-minute conversation, tell 3 lies each? That's incredible." He threw his arms out at the spit-stricken screen. "A lot of dishonesty is going around our parts, but I've been installing lie detectors after talks with police stations, courts, and kindergarten classrooms.

"My patented lie detectors are very simple." A model appeared. "Just put several sensors on the person and watch the biometrics. Signals figure out someone is lying with incredible accuracy. But don't just take my word, here's one of my satisfied customers."

An older crimson appeared. "I been a judge for 'bout sixty years now, and I thought I could tell lies easy, but we're gettin' more and more readings, and keeping many bad people off of the streets. I find this a mighty shame nowadays we're losing our cultural values, and there are no good, honest, young folks anymore, that's why I think this is a good investment."

Daybreak appeared once again. "Why our product is so great, Cyras Sumhyr ordered over 20 of them." He showed footage of Cyras entering the shop. "Order now, and I'll double the offer. Instead, you'll get two Lie Detectors for ten Drakold, that's double the value. Just call in the next fifteen minutes!"

[pinkslashersimp]

Hiii, can i request for HCS from an AU where rz Michael Myers is just a very tall normal 17 year old boy? (an AU where he never killed his sister, never killed animals etc) and what would a relationship with "teenager" Michael be like? (sorry if this is confusing😭)

Hello good to see u again:>

I’ll include some general HC as well as relationship headcanons bc i have been waiting for this one i have so many thoughts in my silly little head about RZ michael omg

I will be writing him as 18 if hes in a relationship even if it’s sfw here ^

ur req isn’t confusing at all!! (and keep ur eye peeled bc i’m working on ur other reqs as well>:))💗💗💗

Normal!RZ Michael Myers headcanons 🌷💗

Generic headcanons about teen michael:

Still has his long hair, he didn’t wanna cut it at all and he likes that it hides his face most of the time.

Probably good that his hair hides his face, as I HC normal teen michael as a very shy teen boy and a little insecure.

(But in more of a ‘I hate all of you I wanna go home’ way, not a ‘I’m too scared to talk to people’ way)

METALHEAD!

I think his fave song out of these three bands would be Chop Suey! by System of a down, specifically the lines ‘Father! Father!’ and ‘Why have you forsaken me? in your eyes forsaken me!’

Would wear shirts from these bands with zip up hoodies and jeans. Literally just dresses like a normal shy teen metalhead.

Would wear shirts from these bands with zip up hoodies and jeans. Literally just dresses like a normal shy teen metalhead.

He listens to some other bands aside from heavy/death metal. Like deftones, the smashing pumpkins...

His fave song from those two bands are Shut up and drive/Today

Wouldn’t have many friends (because he’s bad at speaking to people...and they’re all a little intimidated by him) so he would definitely sit by himself at lunch/in class. Occasionally people will come and sit with him though, hes so quiet he gives off a friendly giant vibe

Spends all his time in his room listening to music and drawing/making masks.

Just like in the hospital, his room would be FULL of his crafts. Drawings, masks on the wall, posters of bands he likes, shelves full of sketchbooks and materials like glue and newspaper.

Very messy bedroom aside from this, though. Clothing on the floor, shoes by his bedroom door, unmade bed etc etc.

Michael still has paranoid schizophrenia either way and I honestly think his parents wouldn’t support him much. His mom would give him the “Im sorry mike i’m busy, it’s probably just puberty” talk (even tho hes 18) and his father would just chalk it up to him “being in that damn room all day.”

So he takes it upon himself to get help (even tho that shits horribly expensive). He gets a little job in the shop near his school and saves up enough to see a therapist each week/month.

Relationship HC

Most likely he’d be incredibly shocked when his s/o takes interest in him

Hes a 6’9 metalhead who sits by himself at lunch and rarely talk to anyone. why??? do you like him??????

Hes very suspicious at first, thinking it’s either a prank or you have the wrong idea and think hes some ‘mysterious’ dude. But after spending some time with his s/o he eases up by a lot

Would help a bit if his s/o dresses in the same way or listens to the same band but in the end it’s indifferent, hes just happy someone thinks hes good enough to hang around with.

Big fan of hand holding and cuddling from behind, especially when his s/o are sat in his lap, and he has his arms wrapped around them, resting his chin atop their head.

Wouldnt let you go to his house at first, his stepdad is a prick and he’s worried that would scare you off. he also really needs to clean his room first

Enjoys spending date nights where you literally just hang around in empty playgrounds running around and jumping on the swings, or loitering in empty parking lots and riding around in the shopping carts until an angry employee comes out to yell at you both

Waits for his s/o outside of class

Enjoys staying in with his s/o and quietly cuddling in his room whilst streaming some low budget horror movie on his TV

Not a very emotional person because of his childhood so he tends to show his love through physical touch and gifts

Fears nothing. He is your personal spider remover.

Definitely the kind of partner to learn the guitar to try and impress his s/o. Spends all week learning the intro to Shut up and drive so he can show his s/o once school ends and they come over

[prettytoxix]

Watergate pt2

Part one

Eddie Munson x Reader pairing

A/n: I’m not like overly proud of this but I still wanted to post it while I’m working on another Steve blurb :)

Summary: Y/n and the gang try to attack Vecna in the upside down (story spanning from episodes 8 and 9)

Word count: 3900

We were woke up by 7:30. Everyone was awake except for Eddie and me, so they were making quite a ruckus in the kitchen trying to find something to eat. Eddie and I make our way out of the bedroom and take our places on the couch where the group is now sitting. Nancy sat in front of all of us as she explained what she saw.

“He showed me things that haven't happened yet…” Nancy begins. “The most awful things.” She started. “I saw a dark cloud spreading over Hawkins…downtown on fire…dead soldiers… and this… this giant creature with a gaping mouth. The creature wasn’t alone. there were so many monsters. An army…And they were coming into Hawkins. Our neighborhoods, our homes. And then he showed me my mom, Holly, Mike and they.. they were all….” she trails off with tears streaming down her face.

“He’s just trying to scare you, Nance.” Steve ensures her. “Right? I mean it’s not real.”

“Not yet. But there was something else. It showed me the gates. Four gates spreading across Hawkins and these gates…they looked like the one here, at Eddie’s trailer, but it didn’t stop growing. This wasn’t upside down Hawkins…this was our Hawkins” She warns.

“Four chimes.” Max jumps in. “The clock always chimes four times, exactly. He’s been telling us his plan this whole time.” She concludes, shaking her head in disbelief.

“Four kills,” Lucas says. “Four gates. End of the world.”

“If that's true he’s only one kill away,” Dustin states the obvious.

“Jesus Christ!” Eddie swears.

“Try them again!” Steve commands Max. Max gets up and tries to dial the Byers' house again. But not by surprise, no one picks up. She tries again thinking maybe the number could have been dialed wrong but still no one answered.

We try to think about the logic behind the Byers not answering their phone. I suggested that it could be because of Joyce’s new job. I mean, she is a telemarketer now so I’d assume she’d be on the phone for quite a while but Max brings up the point that the line wouldn’t be constantly busy for three days. Whatever is happening here in Hawkins is somehow happening in Lenora.

“But Vecna can’t hurt them…not if he’s dead. We have to go back in there!” Nancy states.

“No! No! No! NO!” Steve, Robin, Eddie, and I all say in response to her crazy idea.

“Why not?”

“Because we barely made it out in one piece!”

“Because we weren’t prepared! This time we’ll be ready! We’ll get weapons and protection and we’ll go through the gate, find his layer, and kill him!”

“Or help kill us! The only reason you survived was because he wanted you to! He’s not scared of us!”

“And for good reason!” Robin adds, “We learned something new about Henry/Vecna/One. He’s a number just like Eleven…only evil and child-murdering with really bad skin. He’s super powerful. He could turn us inside out with the snap of his fingers… it’s not a fair fight!”

“So why fight fair?” Dustin says. “you’re right, he’s like Eleven. So that gives us the upper hand. We know her strengths and weaknesses.” Dustin concludes by explaining that when El travels remotely she’s in a trance-like state. That explains what Vecna was doing in the attack of the old Victor Creel house. He was in a trance-like state in the upside-down attacking his victims remotely. He’ll be vulnerable next time he’s attacking. We’ll need a distraction in order to get to Vecna.

Max offers herself as bait claiming that she’s still tagged by Vecna. Still cursed by him. She says that she’ll be able to distract him while the others find him and chop his head off. I feel bad for her, she’s talked to me before about some of the things that upset her. So I can only imagine the memories she’s seeing due to Vecna.

“Whatever it is…whatever you do… try not to miss.” She says.

Eddie tells the group that he knows where we can get weapons. He searches for the phone book located somewhere in the messy trailer. When he finally locates it he sets it down and flips it to the page he had in mind while we all gather around him.

“Check this out! Warzone. I’ve been there once. It's huge. They got everything you need for uh killing things basically…” Eddie explains

“How is this even legal?” I ask.

“Well lucky for us, it just is.” He says. “This place is just far enough outside of Hawkins. As long as we steer clear of main roads we oughta avoid cops and angry hicks.”

“I think if we’re trying to avoid angry hicks we shouldn’t be going to a place called ‘The Warzone.’” Erica suggests.

“Normally I’d agree but we need the weapons.” Nancy starts. “So I think it’s worth the risk.”

“It’s gonna take all day on bikes.” Dustin brings up.

“Oh, we’re not using bikes,” Eddie smirks.

“Oh, you got some secret car we don’t know about, Munson?” Steve asks.

“It’s not exactly a car and it’s not exactly mine... But uhh it’ll do.” Eddie says awkwardly. He directs his attention toward Max. “Hey, red, you gotta ski mask, or a bandanna or something in your trailer I can use?”

“Yeah, I have something that could work.” Max runs over to the trailer next door and grabs a Halloween mask. “Will this suffice?” She asks Eddie.

“That'll do the trick!” Eddie slips on the mask and urges us to follow behind him. He peaks around each trailer until he finds exactly what he was looking for. He tries to be stealthy, but it’s hard to be stealthy when you’re in a group so large. He runs up to an RV parked near all the trailers and jumps inside one of the windows.

The first thing he does when he gets inside the stranger's RV is take off the mask and rush to the front. He complains about how hard it is to breathe in that mask and I can’t help but laugh at him quietly. I’m second into the RV while everyone else follows quickly.

Once Eddie is sitting down in the front seat he reaches for the wires under the steering wheel. He cuts them with a pair of pliers while Steve and I watch. He starts to rub the cut wires together.

“Where did you learn how to do this?” Steve asks, more concerned than wanting to actually know.

“Well, while all the other kids were out learning how to fish or play ball, my old man was teaching me how to hot wire,” Eddie informs him.

“I’m not sure I really like the idea of you driving this thing.” I tell Eddie, fully aware of how he is with driving because I’ve been in his van with him and it wasn’t too pleasant. But driving a big RV with about 10 people or so in it sounds much worse.

“Oh don’t worry. I’m just starting this sucker. Harrington’s got her, don't you big boy?” The RV starts and Eddie quickly moves out of the front seat to make room for Steve. Steve struggles to accept the fact that he’s gonna be the one driving but after it sets in he starts to drive.

The owners of the RV notice and start to get very angry. Steve is going relatively slow so we all yell at him to speed it up. He floors it towards the road and Dustin notes that they look pissed at us.

“Well, it’s not very day you lose your house and your car in one fell swoop.” I announce.

And just like that, we’re on the road. Steve struggles to gain control at first. He’s definitely not used to driving such a large vehicle so it takes him a moment to figure it out exactly. But once he’s got the hang of it we’re set. It’s just a straight shot from this road to The Warzone.

Nancy takes the passenger seat next to Steve while the rest of us sit in the back. I’m practically on Eddie’s lap as we can all barely fit in there. My hands find their way to his hair as Nancy and Steve are talking in the front. Lucas goes to the very back to talk with Max. And I try to have my own conversation with Eddie.

“I’m going back in there,” I inform him.

“you’re going back where, sweetheart?” He asks, genuinely confused. Not really putting two and two together.

“…The upside down,” I say.

“No! No way! You and I staying up here! We can help in some other way, but I’m not going to put your life at risk!” Eddie looks at me with the most unsettled eyes I have ever seen. It hurts to see him worry about me like this but I know that I have to help my friends more than anything…even if it means risking my life.

“Eddie-” I start to say but he interrupts me.

“Y/n, I can’t let you go there… I can’t risk losing you over…over some monster!”

“Eddie, please listen to me, okay?” I stare into his eyes waiting for him to say something but he says nothing. I finish my thought. “This time we are prepared. We’ll have weapons this time, we can actually protect ourselves and fight them off. Vecna won’t be able to hurt me if he’s focused on Max.”

“I don’t like this, y/n. Not at all…” he sighs out loudly. “But I know I won’t be able to stop you. No matter how much I protest you’ve already made up your mind.” He looks defeated and it breaks my heart.

Steve pulls into Warzone and everyone leaves the RV to go inside except for Eddie, Lucas, Max, and I. We’re sitting there talking about Steve and Nancy. We start placing more bets on whether or not they’ll get back together before this whole thing ends. Lucas and Eddie say they won’t but Max and I say they will. Each winner gets $10, $5 from each loser.

While these are frustrating times it’s nice to be able to laugh as a group again. Not having to think about the possibility of death and worrying about our other friends. Steve bursts into the RV and announces that we have to go. The rest of the group follows him in and Erica tells us that Jason was inside. Steve leaves the parking lot as fast as he can without raising concern among the shoppers.

After driving for about 20 awkward minutes we find a suitable plot of empty land to start working on our weapons. Eddie Dustin and I stick together and make our “Shields” out of trash can lids and long nails.

Eddie places one foot on the crate he was using and puts on a production for Dustin and me. “Light but durable. Deadly but reliable... Hear me now! There will be no more retreating from Eddie the banished!”

“You’re really ready for bat-tle!” Dustin chortles. I can’t help but snort at that pun. It was a bad pun, don’t get me wrong. But it was actually kinda funny. Eddie looks over at me with this blank look on his face like he can’t believe I actually snorted at something so stupid.

“Do you get it?” Dustin asks Eddie. “B-a-t. Bat-tle?”

“Yeah, I get it, dude.” Eddie informs him un-enthused. Abruptly Eddie starts to tackle Dustin and they start to wrestle in the middle of this random field. It’s kind of nice to see them happily play but I can’t help but feel a little embarrassed.

“Is that really necessary?” I ask, not exactly annoyed but more exasperated. I look over to see if anyone else is watching them and see that Robin has glanced over while talking to Steve by the RV. “Sinclairs! How are those spears coming along?” I don’t want to pay any attention to Eddie and Dustin.

Lucas gives me a big thumbs up and I take that as a good sign. The thumbs-up is followed by the sound of the brother and sister starting to bicker. Dustin and Eddie continue to play fight as they bring their shields into the playful matter. They urge me to join them but I politely decline as I continue to put more nails into mine.

We all pile back into the RV and Steve starts driving to the Victor Creel house. The ride there is silent because we all know what’s about to happen. We don’t bother trying to cheer each other up with jokes or anything. We accept that this could be the last time we see each other healthy.

when we pull up to the house Max, Lucas, and Erica get out of the RV. We watch them walk up to the door before driving away. Our main target is Eddie’s trailer, where the gate is. We all go over the plan before even entering the trailer.

“We’re gonna run through it one more time, alright?” Nancy directs. “Phase one.”

I answer this one. “We meet Erica at the playground. She’ll signal Max and Lucas when we’re ready.”

“Phase two.”

“Max baits Vecna. He’ll go after her in his trance.”

“Phase three.”

“Dustin, y/n, and I lead the bats away.” Eddie answers.

“Four.”

“We go into the hopefully bat-free lair and flambe.”

“Nobody deviates from the plan no matter what, got it?” We all reply with understanding and then head into the trailer.

Steve goes up the sheet rope through the gate first and gets the mattress ready for everyone. We all put our gear through the gate and make it through safely. Once we’ve all made it through we start to go outside and Steve stops us.

“Listen if anything starts to go south at all? Abort. Got it? Draw the attention to the bats. Don’t try to be heroes, you’re just decoys.” Steve tells us.

“It’s alright, Steve. You can be the hero.” I tell him.

“I mean look at us,” Eddie says. “we are…not heroes.”

We all start to go our separate ways as the three others diverge into the woods off to Victor Creels house. Dustin, Eddie, and I start to use all the scrap metal we can find in order to make a cage-looking thing around the trailer for our protection.

“Not bad,” Eddie says.

“Not bad at all!” Dustin responds.

“Now for the fun part,” I say, elbowing Eddie who gets the hint after a moment. He rushes inside and just stands in awe at his guitar for a minute. “Jesus…” he mutters. “It’s like she was made for an alternate dimension.” He grabs his guitar off the wall and slings it over his shoulder.

“What do you say, y/n? Are you ready for the most metal concert in the history of the world?”

“Is that rhetorical?”

“Let’s do this thing!” We grab the amps and pedals and get them all connected on the roof of the trailer to make sure the noise travels further and louder. Now we just wait for the queue to start this thing. We sit on the roof dodging the fact that we could die. Just like the drive in the RV, we don’t try to make each other laugh or anything. We just talk.

“We’re gonna be fine, right?” Dustin asks me.

“Yeah, we’re all gonna be fine. We have weapons to protect us this time so there’s nothing to worry about” I try to convince him, but I can’t even convince myself of that fact.

“I wouldn’t place any bets, y/l/n,” Eddie says.

“I won’t let anything happen to either of you. I promise.” Now that was easy to believe. I can even convince myself of that because it’s true. I would do anything for either of them.

“Let's hope that's not the case,” Eddie says downward. I can tell he’s scared, that he’s not mentally prepared for this battle.

We get the signal that it’s time for us to begin our distraction. Eddie plugs in his guitar to the amp and begins.

“Chrissy, this is for you!” He starts strumming the chords of Master of Puppets by Metallica. I can’t help but mouth the lyrics as he plays along. He’s starting to get really into it as he starts banging his head along with the song.

“Eddie! Gotta lockdown in T-minus 30 seconds!” I tell him.

“T-minus 20!” Eddie starts to play the riff, and I’m very impressed but can’t say anything. I’m too focused on these bats to compliment him.

“T-minus 10!”

“Five!”

“One!”

We rush inside the trailer where we make it to safety and the bat-like creatures can’t get us.

“Eddie! That was amazing! Most. Metal. Ever!!” Dustin and I coo. Eddie bows and waves mouthing “thank you, thank you.”

We hear the bat-like creatures trying to find their way inside from the top of the trailer. We think we’re fine but we keep our guard up. Suddenly a bat starts to come out of the vent and into the trailer. Dustin and I go after it quickly with our spears.

“There’s no other vents, right?” Dustin intrigues.

Bats start to swarm into the trailer with no warning. We somehow make it into the next room over and shut the door behind but it’s obviously not going to hold out against the major swarm of bats. I urge Dustin and Eddie to go up the sheet rope and they make it through successfully. I’m about to go through when I think of a way to protect them. To lure the bats away from the gate. When I start to turn around Eddie and Dustin start yelling at me.

“Y/n! Y/n come on! What are you doing?!” I cut the sheet rope to make sure they don’t follow me.

“I’m buying us more time.” I move the mattress from under the gate to the side of the wall.

“Y/n no! Stop! Stop! What are you doing!”

I run outside of the trailer and hop on a bike that was placed conveniently on the side of Eddie’s trailer from before. I ride it as fast and as hard as I can. The bats chase me at a rate that ensures they’re no longer at the trailer.

I get far enough away that I can kind of slow down my pace just a bit, only to be knocked off of my bike by one of the bat-like creatures. I successfully protect myself from the bats that try to attack me while I’m on the ground. The spear was really useful in that matter. But once I’m up off the ground, the bats start to swarm harder around me. Attacking me faster than I can fight back. And just like that, I’m on the ground again. I feel the bats biting my limbs and several deep wounds starting to form.

“Y/n!” I hear Eddie calling.

For no reason known to me, the bats drop dead around me. I’m left laying there as Eddie runs up to me as fast as he can. Dustin follows shortly after him. Eddie kneels beside me and holds me while trying to convince me there’s not a lot of blood and that I’m fine. I can feel blood running out of my mouth though.

“You’re an idiot you know that, right?” Eddie informs me.

“Yeah, but I’m your idiot.” I try to laugh but more blood ends up spilling out of my mouth. Eddie puts his hand on my head and pushes my hair back.

“You’re gonna be fine. Do you hear me? Let’s try to get up, alright?” He places his arm under my arm to try and support me standing up but it feels wrong.

“I just…I need to…catch my breath.”

“Okay, no rush. Take your time. Take your time, y/n.” Everything starts to go black. It’s getting hard to see. My heart rate feels normal, but I just feel…tired. I close my eyes and everything is pitch black.

---

I can hear Eddie speaking. “Chapter 5, Riddles in the Dark… When Bilbo opened his eyes, he wondered if he had; for it was just as dark as with them shut. No one was anywhere near him. Just imagine his fright! He could hear nothing, see nothing, and he could feel nothing except the stone of the floor.”

When I open my eyes again I’m in an unfamiliar place. The room is white with light blue curtains over the windows. The lights are uncomfortably bright. I’m in a very uncomfortable bed and I can feel all the bandages around me. I look to my side and see Eddie, still reading aloud. Unaware that I’m awake.

“…Very slowly he got up and groped about on all fours, till he-” He looks up, and his gaze holds mine. I can see the light spark in his eyes as soon as they meet mine. “Oh my god! You’re awake! Y/n, you’re so stupid!” He comes to my side quickly, taking my hand in his own and kissing it gently. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m feeling…sore. Kinda heroic.” I joke. Eddie laughs just happy to see I’m okay. “How long have I been…ya know?”

“About three days or so…” He breathes out heavily and hangs his head low before raising it back up. “I’m glad you’re awake and all but you’re gonna get a stern talking to when you’re feeling better. Steve was not too pleased with you when he found out.”

“That reminds me… did Steve and Nancy get back together?”

He laughs, like a real gut laugh before answering my question. “No, uh Jonathan or whatshisface came back from California.”

“Are you serious? I owe you $5 now?”

“You sure do.” He says proudly.

“Can you keep reading?” I plead with him.

“Of course I can,” he picks up the book and flips it to where he left off. “Very slowly he got up and groped about on all fours, till he touched the wall of the tunnel; but neither up nor down it could he find anything: nothing at all, no sign of goblins…”

[jungshookz]

hwayoung’s two now and y/n’s allowed to be emotional about it, okay?

➺ genre; ceo!yoongiverse!! a little bit of yoongi and y/n being mushy for each other!! fluff!! cutest drabble for the cutest girl!! jungkook and jimin bickering like an old married couple as per usual!! 

➺ wordcount; 3.2k

➺ p.s. this drabble is approximately five months overdue and it’s basically been collecting dust in my drafts so i figured i’d finally release it into the wild since it’s mother’s day today and i thought it’d be nice to read something sweet on this special day!!!! happy mother’s day!!! give ur mom a big ol hug and a kiss on the cheek :-) and if u don’t celebrate mother’s day that’s okay you can still read this for a small boost of serotonin wahoo :D 

                                       »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i’d just like to inform you that if it wasn’t for the fact that today is hwayoung’s birthday, the idea of having cake as part of breakfast would definitely be off the table.” yoongi pauses before turning his head to look at you pointedly, “in fact, it wouldn’t even had made it to the table in the first place.”

“trust me, you’ve made that clear multiple times-” you roll your eyes playfully before offering yoongi a half-hearted shrug, “it’s not a big deal! we’ll just give her a tiny little chunk that’ll fit in her tiny little hand and then we’ll save the rest for later!”

“yeah, right-” yoongi snorts, making his way over to you to hand you a balloon, “you’re probably going to sneak an entire slice of cake into her mouth while i’m not watching-” he teases, digging his fingers into your sides playfully before wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you back against his chest, “you think you’re so sneaky-”

“hey-!” you giggle, squirming in his grip when you feel him starting to nip at the side of your neck, “this is not a very productive use of our time, boss-”

“hey, you two! are you just going to stand there making out all day or are you actually going to help me with the decorations?”

both you and yoongi peer over the edge to see jimin standing by the bottom of the spiral staircase looking very unimpressed and you flash him a sheepish smile 

“we’re not making out-” 

“yeah, well you might as well be-”

“we’re helping! we’re almost done tying balloons to the banisters-” you argue, holding the balloon in your hand up before flopping it around enthusiastically, “we-” you jolt when you accidentally let go of it, watching with wide eyes as it rockets around the ceiling before poot-poot-pooting pathetically and landing on the ground by jimin’s feet

whoops

“…yes, that’s very helpful, thank you.” jimin mutters to himself, shaking his head as he bends down to pick up the sad, spitty balloon up off the ground with a grimace, “when you’re done, come down and help me because this balloon arch isn’t going to make itself! chop-chop, people-” he claps his hands together as he wanders back to the living room to the half-constructed balloon arch

“you know, you’d think that hwayoung was his daughter-” yoongi murmurs lowly, twisting his neck to give your cheek a quick kiss before pulling away

“mm, tell me about i-”

“she’s mine when the two of you drop dead!”

you jump in surprise at the sound of jimin’s voice snapping at you from below and you and yoongi exchange glances before bursting into quiet giggles

“i feel like i should be more concerned that jimin seems to be very eagerly waiting for our deaths.” you joke, reaching for the bag of balloons and pulling out a handful of them

as much as you love your daughter you weren’t planning on having a super big birthday party for her just because..,., well, she’s probably not going to remember most of it considering she’s two and also it’s just the five of you celebrating at home, so you thought that a cake and a bunch of presents would be good enough of a celebration

of course, when you told jimin about these plans he looked like he was ready to bury you alive which is why he insisted that he’d take care of the food and the drinks and basically the entirety of hwayoung’s birthday party and told you that all you and yoongi had to do was sit back, relax, blow up a couple of balloons and also choose a cute birthday outfit for hwayoung

(jimin actually ended up taking over that part as well. he bought her a new birthday dress and a brand new pair of shoes to go with it.)

“everyone can relax! the star of the show has now arrived!”

the sound of the front door slamming shut suddenly shatters the silence and you smile lightly when you see jungkook sauntering in as if he owns the place

“good morning, kook.” you hum, jungkook looking up at you before offering you a lopsided grin, “actually, the star of the show is still fast asleep in her room.”

“oh, right-” jungkook snorts, dismissing you with a flick of his wrist, “i mean, yeah, of course this is hwayoung’s special day- but check it out! i picked up her birthday cake and brought it back here and i didn’t accidentally ruin it somehow!” he raises the big blue box in his hand with a beam, “i’m incredible!”

“that thing looks huge, jungkook!” you frown lightly, “i told you not to go crazy-”

“please tell me you didn’t max out my credit card buying a giant cake for hwayoung.” yoongi chimes in, leaning over and folding his arms atop the banister, “i hope you realise it’s just going to be the three of you having to eat it all-”

“it’s hwayoung’s birthday, i had to splurge! you know that ‘everything is cake’ trend? i ordered a custom cake and asked them to make it look like a giant cookie! but i also ordered a dozen chocolate chip cookies just in case she’s not into the cake.” jungkook smiles proudly before pausing, “…of course, knowing hwayoung, she’s going to love the cookies and the cake, so i’m not too worried. i’m going to see if i can shove these into the fridge-”

“what’s wrong?” yoongi nudges your side to get you to look at him, “you look like you’re thinking, which is never really a good thing-”

“hwayoung’s two now.” you blink twice before turning to look at yoongi, “she’s two.”

“yes. you’re very good at keeping track of our daughter’s age.” yoongi coos, reaching up to pinch your cheek playfully, “good job, baby.”

“two years old!” you gasp, turning around to lean back against the railing before shaking your head, “my god, she’s aged.”

“oh my god, you’re right. the ripe old age of two.” yoongi teases before gasping dramatically and reaching over to grip onto your forearm, “soon, we’ll be thinking about what elementary school to send her off to... and then the next thing you know, we’ll be helping her look for her own apartment when she’s off at university... and then you’ll be going wedding dress shopping with h-”

“stOP stop stop stop-” you wave your hands before covering them over your ears, yoongi laughing lightly when you frown at him, “i don’t want her to turn two! because that means she’s going to turn three… and then she’s going to turn four… and then five, six, seven, eight-” you pause and your eyes suddenly widen in horror, “she’s going to be a sixteen year old one day- what if she turns into a bratty sixteen year old?? because i was a really bratty sixteen year old and i don’t want her to turn out like me! do you know how hard it’s going to be if she turns into me? i used to sneak home at four in the morning-”

“let’s keep in mind that hwayoung is also my daughter and i was not a bratty sixteen year old,” yoongi interrupts calmly before giving your arm a reassuring squeeze, “she’s gonna be fine! and you turned out great, so give yourself a little bit of credit-”

“i just want her to stay two forever.” you pout, crossing your arms stubbornly as you look down the hallway towards her room, “is that too much to ask for??”

“when the terrible twos hit, i guarantee you’re probably going to feel a little different.” yoongi teases, pushing himself up off the banister before gesturing for you to go and join jimin and jungkook downstairs, “why don’t you help jimin out with the balloon arch while i go and wake our little miss two year old up?”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

yoongi presses his lips together tightly as he twists the doorknob, being careful not to make too loud of a sound to accidentally shock hwayoung awake

the last thing he wants is for to burst into tears at the start of her special day

he peers into the bedroom, smiling fondly when he sees a little lump under the covers shuffling a little 

a chubby sock-clad foot pokes out for a second before it disappears again

“이게 누굴까요? [hm… who’s that]?” yoongi asks quietly, the lump suddenly freezing in place, “드디어 일어나셨네요… [i think someone’s finally awake…]”

he tilts his head when a messy head of hair pops out from under the covers, the corners of hwayoung’s mouth immediately lifting in a bright smile when she spots him, “우리 공주 좋은 아침입니다! [oh! good morning, miss min!]”

he lets himself into the room and reaches over to click the white noise machine off before starting to quietly pad his way over to her, his heart melting in his chest when her mouth opens up in a quiet little yawn

“잘 주무떠뜹니까… [gub moming…]” hwayoung murmurs, eyelids fluttering slightly as yoongi reaches down to push some of her hair out of her face

“잘 잤어? [hi, baby… did you sleep well?]” yoongi asks, leaning down to scoop her up, “우리 화영이 생일 축하해… 밑에서 다 기다리고 있어... [happy birthday, my darling… we’re all waiting for you downstairs...]” he whispers, rubbing circles into her warm back when she immediately clings to him, “머리에 물 좀 묻히고 내려갈까? 머리가 아주 산발이네. [why don’t we freshen up a little, hm? the birthday girl can’t take pictures with a bird’s nest on her head.]”

“딴바. [birb’s ness.]”

                                      »»————-　🍰　————-««

“i hope she likes the present i got for her.” jungkook mutters, his foot tapping anxiously against the ground as he looks up towards the top of the stairs in anticipation of hwayoung’s arrival, “i mean, if she doesn’t like it, there’s a receipt in the box so i can return it and get something else for her… but i really hope she likes it.”

“jungkook, she’s two. i gave her a wooden spoon to play with the other day and she was ecstatic.” you snort, peeling an eye open to look at him from where you’re lying on the couch before shutting it again, “i’m sure she’ll love whatever you got for her.”

“what’s the matter with you?” jimin hums, glancing at you for a second before focusing his attention back on sticking the bright pink ‘2’ candle onto the cake, “you look a little out of it today.”

“gee, thanks.” you snort, blindly grabbing one of the throw pillows before hugging it to your chest, “no, i’m fine, i just- i was feeling a little mopey this morning about hwa turning two and now i’m just thinking about how time has just flown by…”

“mm. it seems like it was only yesterday that i was holding your hair back while you violently puked your guts out into the toilet bowl.” jimin jokes, holding a hand to his chest before spinning around to face you and jungkook, “ah… fond memories that i’ll look back on for the rest of my life.”

“you know, i should’ve told yoongi i was pregnant in another way.” you suddenly change the subject, propping yourself up onto your elbows with a frown, “all i did was give him a tiny cookie. how lame is that?!”

“to be fair, you didn’t know how he was going to react, so maybe it was a good thing you went for something so simple!” jimin shrugs, making his way over to you before sticking his hand out for you to take, “c’mon, miss mopey. hwayoung probably doesn’t want to see you throwing yourself a pity party on her special day when she comes down here.”

                                     »»————-　🍰　————-««

“-화영이가 엄마한테가서 이쁜짓 해주는 거 어떨까? [-now, mama is feeling very emotional today, so i think it’d be a really good idea to act extra cute, okay?]” yoongi whispers to hwayoung, planting a quick kiss on her cheek while slowly making his way down the stairs, “of course, that probably isn’t going to be a problem for you, seeing that you’re adorable 24/7-”

“i adowbo.” hwayoung murmurs, leaning down and squishing her cheek against yoongi’s shoulder, “졸려. [i seepy.]”

“졸리다고? [sleepy?]” yoongi pauses on the steps, reaching up to adjust one of her pigtails with a smile, “이거 큰일났네, 졸리면 어떡해! [you can’t be sleepy for your morning conference. look alive!]”

“is that the sleepy little birthday girl?” 

yoongi looks down to see you waiting eagerly at the bottom of the stairs, your hands clasped together and your eyes glued on hwayoung, “good morning!”

“mama!” hwayoung immediately twists around in yoongi’s arms at the sound of your voice, reaching out for you with a teethy grin as soon as yoongi gets close enough to you

“oh, happy birthday, my sweet little baby!“ you coo as you take her into your arms, squishing multiple kisses to her chubby cheek as you hold her close, “happy happy birthday, my beautiful girl…”

“ahppa bouday!” hwayoung giggles, little hands patting against your face

she leans in and smushes her nose against yours before giving you a drooly kiss on the cheek and you can’t help but laugh at how affectionate she’s being with you

see??

you want to keep her like this forever and it sucks to think about the fact that one day you’re going to set her down on the ground after carrying her and you’ll never pick her up again because she won’t need you to pick her up again

:-(

“oh…” you sniffle, suddenly feeling your nose prickle and your eyes starting to get a little tingly, “i love you so much…”

you don’t get much of a chance to say anything else before hwayoung’s suddenly being plucked from your arms, both jimin and jungkook immediately starting to fawn over her as per usual

“우리 화영이, 공주님이 따로 없네! [look at how beautiful you are in your dress!]” jimin exclaims animatedly, hwayoung clapping her hands together in response

her dress is sage green and gingham and it even came with matching ribbons for her hair and you have to admit that jimin made a pretty good choice with this birthday outfit

you probably would’ve stuck her in a pair of overalls or something

“see, what’d i say?” jimin smiles proudly, smoothing down the back of hwayoung’s dress before looking over at jungkook, “i told you the sage green was cuter- 아니 빨간 걸 왜 입혀 뭐 애를 도마로 만들 생각이니- [the red one that you wanted to go with would’ve made her look like a picnic blanket-]”

“아니 도마라니! [red gingham is classy!]” jungkook argues, trailing behind jimin while making faces at hwayoung to get her to laugh, “입혀보지도 않고- [you didn’t even give it a chance-]”

“난 그딴 거 염두에 두지 않는다 정국아- [i don’t need to give tacky garbage a chance, jungkook-]”

“hey, are you okay?” yoongi gives you a quick hug and kiss on the side of your head when he suddenly notices a tear running down your cheek, “she’s just turning two, y/n... she’s not moving out of the country-”

“i know, i know-“ you sniffle, reaching up to quickly wipe at your tears before chuckling, “i guess i’m just feeling extra emotional today-”

“c’mon, parents!” jimin calls out for you two while setting hwayoung down in her high chair, “the candle is melting and this cake is too expensive to get any wax dripped on it-”

“gookee!” hwayoung points to the cake and claps her hands as she bounces up and down on her seat, “gookee, mama!”

“yeah! cookie!” you mimic enthusiastically, smiling widely when she suddenly lets out a high-pitched squeal of excitement, her nose scrunching particularly cutely, “i’m glad to see that you inherited my love for cookies and not appa’s love for muesli.”

yoongi immediately scoffs and reaches down to give your bum a quick swat

“i know she’s saying cookie, but i’m just going to go ahead and say that she’s actually saying the name of her favourite uncle-” jungkook sighs, reaching down to pinch hwayoung’s cheek, “화영이는 꾹이 삼촌 제일 좋아하- [uncle gookee is your forever favourite-]”

“어 응 뉘에- [yeah, okay, whatever helps you sleep at night-]” jimin snorts, shoving the camera into his hands as the four of you stand in front of hwayoung, “okay, don’t touch the cake yet! let’s get some pretty pictures of the birthday girl first!”

“hwa, look into the camera!” jungkook coos, snapping his fingers to get her to look up at him, “그래 삼촌 한 번만 봐 봐- [look at uncle goo- yeah, there we go-]”  

you watch hwayoung fondly as she continues to ham it up for the camera, her little legs kicking in anticipation under the tray

“good girl, you’re being so patient.” you hum before reaching over to pluck a cookie from the open box, “ooh, i’ve been dying to sink my teeth into one of these-” 

“i had one earlier, they’re pretty good!” jimin nods, brushing past jungkook to get to you, “the bakery i ordered them from has, like five out of five stars one google review- hey, what’s that face for?”

“eugh- do the cookies taste a little funky to you?” you face screws up as you swallow the bite before holding the cookie up to take a closer look at it, “it’s just chocolate chip, right?”

“yeah- hold on, lemme try-” jimin frowns, reaching over to steal your cookie before taking a bite of it and chewing thoughtfully

“maybe you just got a weird one?” yoongi suggests, peering into the box with a frown, “all cookies taste funky to me, so my opinion probably isn’t valid here-”

“it’s fine, i’ll try another one later-” you dust your fingers off before perking up and clapping your hands together, “hey, should yoongi and i hop in for some pictures before hwa completely destroys the entire cake?”

“yeah, it… might be a little too late for that.” jungkook clears his throat and the three of you look over to see hwayoung’s tubby arms shoved elbow deep into the cake, “i gave her the green light to go ahead and eat. she just looked so sad and hungry, i’m sorry!”

hwayoung cackles in glee as she continues slapping her hand against the cake, her grubby little hands now sticky and her new dress stained with globs of frosting chocolate

“oh my god.” you stifle a laugh and reach up to cover your mouth so that you don’t burst out laughing at the fact that both jimin and yoongi look absolutely appalled

“i spent, like, ten minutes doing her hair-” yoongi whines, gently nudging you aside so he can hurry over to hwayoung and try to salvage the neat little pigtails he spent forever working on, “and now there’s frosting everywhere!”

“that dress was expensive, jungkook!” jimin snaps, and if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was about to burst into tears, “and i didn’t even get any nice pictures with her before she- come on, man-”

“i’m sorry!”

“ahppy bodday!” hwayoung shrieks in delight and flings her arms up, chunks of cake and specks of frosting flicking out from her hands, “i adowbo!”

👔click here for more ceo!yoongi content (+ hwayoung!)

🎙️help me help you make your wishes come true (send me a request!)

✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here? (full fics!)

💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles like this one!)

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[archived-kin]

late with lucifer

note from kin: i just realised that the title sounds like a talk show ffs

anyway get ready to get SAPPY (and also get ready for a low-key out of character lucifer)

fandom: obey me!

character(s): gn! reader, lucifer, satan, beelzebub, belphie

pairing(s): lucifer/reader

warning(s): brief existential dread right at the end but i think it’s relatively light

genre: fluff all the way (with maybe a teensy bit of angst???? i accidentally got kinda deep towards the end)

Deciding to commit yourself to a bona fide workaholic music nerd who would sooner chop his own hand off than skip a single working day for potentially the rest of eternity has been... a choice and a half, to say the least. Yes, he’s a sweetheart most of the time, and you love him more than possibly any being in the known universe (though jury’s still out on cats and the dragon you met a couple of months ago who brings you giant mouthfuls of leaves every weekend), but you’d be lying if he didn’t have qualities that make you want to drop kick some sense into him sometimes. And one of those qualities happens to be his absolute refusal to just take a damn break.

“Just one more hour,” He keeps telling you whenever you ask him if he’s finally finished with his mountain load of paperwork. “One more hour, and then we can spend some time together.”

It has been five hours since Lucifer went to his study to ‘get a bit of work done’. Five hours of attempting to finish the mountain of books Satan has recommended you in the corner of the library, probably irritating the poor guy to no end with your constant restless shifting. You're surprised that he hasn’t up and left to go read in his room in peace - then again, it’d be hypocritical of him to tell you off for moving about. You’d think a bookworm like him would be so absorbed by his beloved books that he wouldn’t be able to move at all, but he fidgets about so much when he’s reading that you’re surprised he hasn’t somehow worn a hole through his favourite armchair yet. At any rate, you’re pretty sure you can see him getting ready to flip himself upside down for the seventh time this evening in the corner of your eye.

You try once again to focus on the lucrative business deal happening in Chapter 52 for the fourth time in the last ten minutes, but your brain just doesn’t seem to be listening to you right now; no matter how hard you try to register what’s going on, the words just don’t want to be processed. Finally, checking the clock on the wall for what feels like the hundredth time this evening, you decide that you might as well go bother your busy bee upstairs. It’s been at least a fortnight since you’ve been able to spend a full evening or night with him, and, if you’re honest, it’s beginning to get a little on your nerves.

Satan barely looks up from his book as you hop to your feet and begin making your way out, though he does lift a hand to wave a brief goodbye. Contrary to your prediction, he has not flipped himself upside down, but is now sitting the wrong way around on his armchair instead, facing the seat’s back, with his book carefully balanced on its head. Unconventional, but you’ll give him credit for the creativity.

The House of Lamentation is oddly quiet for a Friday night, but you’d guess that’s because Asmo and Mammon, the two loudest members of the house, have taken it upon themselves to celebrate the arrival of the weekend by going out for the night and probably blowing their savings in the process. Well, Asmo will be blowing his savings - Mammon will most likely find a way to put his spendings on one of his other brother’s tabs, or worse, yours. Then again, you don’t buy things often, so you suppose you can spare a bit of cash. (Knowing Mammon, though, he’ll probably buy enough to put you in debt for the rest of your life.)

On your way through the corridor, you’re struck by a sudden idea. Lucifer’s been shut in his study ever since he got home from the R.A.D., which means he most likely won't have eaten anything. At any rate, you know for a fact he wasn’t there for dinner with everyone else, which means you now have a much better excuse for going to see him other than just wanting to. Lucifer may be a stubborn demon, but he's never been able to resist a mug of tea and some biscuits on long nights when it's you offering them.

Beel is rustling about in the snack cupboard when you slip into the kitchen - no surprises there, but it is a little odd that he’s going for the lighter foods rather than something more filling. You'd comment on why he's down here so late into the night - he should really be in bed - but then again, it's Beel. He'd listen to his stomach over his brain any day of the week.

“Oh, hey,” He greets as he retreats from the cupboard with an armful of what look like several cookie boxes stacked on top of each other. “Did you get hungry as well?”

You shake your head and pull two mugs out of the crockery cabinet. “Nope. Just thought I’d bring Lucifer some tea and biscuits, you know?”

“He’s been in his office for ages,” Beel agrees with an earnest nod. He glances down at the heap of cookies in his arms, then pauses. “Ah… here.”

You look up as you fill the kettle with water to see him holding one of the boxes in his arms out to you.  “...what’s this for?”

“There aren’t any biscuits left in the cupboard,” He says by way of explanation, shaking the box he’s offering to indicate that you should take it. “So you can have these.”

“Aw, you don’t have to do that, Beel!” You gently push the box back towards him and give his arm a fond pat. “I’ll just bring him something else. Go ahead and eat the cookies, okay?”

On any other occasion, Beel would most likely have accepted your offer without hesitation (the day that Beel rejects food will probably never come, but you have a sneaking suspicion that a black hole would rip this reality apart if it does), but it must have been a really good day for him in terms of being fed, because he actually continues to try to give you the box. You’re tempted to coo at the big softie’s uncharacteristic generosity, but you’re not particularly sure how that would go over with him. If being in a relationship with Mr Pridey McPrideface upstairs has taught you anything, it’s that you can never take a reaction for granted.

“No, you have it,” Beel insists, shifting so that he doesn’t drop the rest of his biscuits and stubbornly attempting to shove the box into your hands. “I’ve got plenty right here.”

Your surprise must show on your face, because a moment later he smiles a little sheepishly and adds, “I promise I’m not sick or anything. I’ve still got lots right here. One box won’t make that much of a difference.”

You think it over for a moment as the kettle begins to bubble aggressively behind you. You’re a staunch believer in the fact that one should never deprive Beel of his food, partially because he’s an absolute sweetheart who deserves the food he eats, and partially because something bad could and probably would happen if said food is taken from him. Then again, you’re not taking the food from him, strictly speaking - he’s the one offering it to you. That exempts you, right? At the very least, you have a counter-argument if Belphie tries to persecute you for taking his beloved twin brother’s biscuits. (He probably wouldn’t - the kid adores you - but it’s good to be prepared for possible trials.)

“Ah, fine...” You eventually relent and allow Beel to press the box into your hands. Your compliance is well worth it - the beam on his face and the little pat he gives the box in your hands in satisfaction could probably cure multiple strains of cancer. “You’re the sweetest, you know that?”

He flushes slightly. “I-it’s not that big of a deal…”

“Oh, that’s nonsense,” You tell him firmly over your shoulder, beginning to busy yourself with the teabags and sugar as the kettle hisses to a halt. “Personally, I think I’m going to remember it for the rest of my life.”

You smile to yourself as Beel laughs a little bashfully behind you. “Thanks…”

“No problem, bub,” You reply, pausing in your work to turn around and shoot him a wink. “Hey, chuck me a spoon, would you?”

He nods and does just that - literally. He throws the spoon across the kitchen with such precision that it lands perfectly in your outstretched hand.

You thank him and begin to pour the hot water into Lucifer’s mug. He says that he likes his tea as is, without any bells or whistles or fancy additions, but you’ve been doing this thing for long enough that you know that he actually prefers his tea with a teaspoon of honey and just a splash of lemon. He just refuses to actually say it out loud.

(To be honest, you’re not sure why he does that - does he think tea with honey and lemon is a wimpy drink or something just because you told him it’s often drunk as a remedy for a sore throat in the human world? Knowing the way his mind works, it’s probably something along those lines, but still, it’s a weird conclusion to make.)

You finish preparing Lucifer’s tea quickly - you’ve done this so many times that the movements have become second nature to you at this point - and start making your own. The drinks are finished a minute or so later, and with that you begin setting up your little snack tray.

After a moment’s debate, you decide that today is worth going the extra mile, and start to carefully arrange the biscuits on a pretty plate.  It’s a bit of a hassle to get them into the right formation, but it’ll be well worth it once you get them to their intended receiver - Lucifer always gets the fondest little smile on his face when you bring him his biscuits in patterns, and that man doesn’t smile nearly enough for your taste. Personally, you’d quite like it if he smiled like that all the time, but then again, their rarity is what makes them so precious to you.

Ah - you’re starting to get sappy again. That’s a surefire sign that you haven’t spent enough time with your beloved demon lately. Well, it’s a good thing you’re going to see him now, isn’t it?

The door to Lucifer’s study is still as tightly shut as it was five hours ago when you approach it, but you doubt he’s actually locked it. He’s stopped doing that ever since your visits while he works became a regular thing - he hasn’t said it out loud yet, but you know that it’s his way of showing you that you’re always welcome to come in.

Unlocked as it is, though, you can’t exactly turn the doorknob to let yourself in. You’re a human of many talents, but being able to balance a heavy tray in one hand is not one of them. Lucifer’s tea wouldn’t make into his study - it’d just end up all over the floor.

“Lucifer!” You call softly through the door, mindful that he might be having another one of his work-induced headaches, “I’ve brought you some tea! Open up!”

For a while, the only reply is silence. You know there shouldn’t be any reason for him to be, but you can’t help but worry briefly if Lucifer’s somehow angry at you. Then again, Lucifer’s always liked to play the fashionably late card against you - whether to tease you or to disguise something, you’ll never know.

It turns out that your little worry was unfounded - a few moments later, the door swings open to reveal your favourite demon in all his exhausted-looking glory. Lucifer, who looks like the physical manifestation of work burnout, offers you a tired smile, and stands back to let you enter.

(Here’s a little secret - Lucifer would never tell you this, but he’d perked up like a kid when candy is offered the moment he heard your voice. Still, gotta put up the cool front, right? Even if that means waiting restlessly right next to the door for a minute so that you don’t think he’s over-eager…)

“Thank you.” He murmurs as you bring the tray over to his desk and set it down on one of the few patches of wood that aren’t covered by papers.

You dramatically pretend to swipe sweat from your forehead as if you’ve just finished a ten-mile run and shoot a smile up at him. “All in a day’s work, love.”

He smiles softly and leans in to gently press a kiss to the crown of your head. His pale cheeks have darkened slightly - Lucifer’s always been a softie when it comes to the host of sappy nicknames you’ve given him. One gentle ‘sweetheart’ and he’s melting like an ice cube on a hot day. It’s the sort of thing that people like Mammon and Levi would probably call gross or something, but you honestly couldn’t really care less about that. It’s not harming anyone else and it makes both of you happy, so why shouldn’t you give your lover as many endearing pet names as you can come up with?

“What even is all this?” You ask, peering at the papers scattered across the desk as Lucifer moves over to have a look at the plate of biscuits. You look up just in time to spot the way his eyes light up slightly when he sees the flower you've arranged them into.

“This and that,” He replies vaguely, hovering a single gloved hand uncertainly over the plate, as if trying to decide which biscuit he can take without spoiling the pattern.

“That’s hardly an answer at all,” You complain, plucking three broken quills from among the documents and waving them at him. “Why do you keep using these? A pen would be way more efficient.”

“Official documents should be written in the traditional way,” Lucifer tells you. He takes his time chewing the biscuit he’s finally chosen before continuing. “And Diavolo prefers quill and ink calligraphy to look at.”

“Honestly…” You round the edge of the desk and reach up to brush some powdered sugar from the corner of his mouth. “You don’t have to do absolutely everything according to him.”

Lucifer blinks down at you, lips parting slightly in half awe and half surprise as you smile at him. “Ah…”

His smile widens slightly, and he gazes at you with so much fondness in his eyes that you almost feel a little weak at the knees at the very sight. Lucifer really is a dangerous demon - in more ways than one.

“Well, c-come on, then,” You prompt him abruptly, not wanting him to realise how much his gaze has affected you, because you just know it’s going to give him an ego boost. He pauses in surprise as you start tugging him over to the big armchair beside the fire - the one that the both of you can fit snugly into together. “Let’s have a drink together.”

“I still have papers to fill out—” He attempts to say, but cuts himself off as you shake your head and stubbornly attempt to push him down into the seat. It doesn’t work - Lucifer’s much stronger than you, after all - but he does at least seem to appreciate the effort.

“You’re taking a break whether you like it or not,” You insist, starting to smack lightly at his arms in an bid to get him to listen to you. “Papers can wait. I’m more important.”

That does get a little chuckle out of him, and he finally relents, sitting down with a subtle sigh. “That goes without saying.”

You laugh, suddenly a little more hot around the collar than you’d have liked. “You said it!”

Pausing to retrieve the tray with the tea and biscuits and set it on the table beside the armchair, you quickly join Lucifer in front of the fire, snuggling in at his side and letting out a blissful sigh as you feel him start to draw circles on your arm with his fingers. It’s a sort of habit that he’s developed over the last few months - you’re not sure if he even realises that he’s doing it.

The two of you stay like that in comfortable silence for several minutes. Lucifer’s tense shoulders relax more and more with each passing moment, and soon enough, he’s sprawled out against you, pressing his cheek lovingly into the crown of your head. 

It’s only at moments like this that you get to see this softer version of him, so you always cherish it when it happens. Lucifer may be a slightly passive-aggressive panther who could kill most beings with a swipe of his hand if he sees fit, but, every now and then, he’s a sleepy panther who’ll roll over and let you scratch behind his ears.

Conversation is usually sparse at times like this - the two of you are content enough in each other’s presence that you don’t really need to make small talk. Today, however, Lucifer seems to have something he wants to vent about.

“Belphie has been missing a lot of his homework again lately,” He murmurs. You make a noise of affirmation to indicate that you’re listening, staring at the mugs of tea sitting on the table and pondering whether the two of you will actually manage to part for long enough to drink them.

“Is it anything important?” You ask after a moment, playing absent-mindedly with his left hand. He doesn’t make any move to stop you as you mess about with his slender fingers, so you assume that he doesn’t mind.

“Mostly essays,” He replies, shifting slightly and letting out a quiet sigh. “He’s never liked writing them, but he hasn’t had so many missing before.”

You make a thoughtful sound. Now that you think about it, wasn’t Belphie confiding in you about this the other day?

“It’s just hard to sit down and concentrate sometimes, especially when I’m always so tired,” You remember him saying resignedly over hot chocolate and marshmallows. “It’s not like I don’t want to turn all my homework in on time. Sometimes I just can’t.”

“Well, you shouldn’t force yourself to do them, either,” You’d replied, giving his shoulders a sympathetic pat. “Needs over school of course. If you need to sleep more, then sleep more - if you feel like you can’t write the essay, then don’t write the essay. I’ll talk to Lucifer if he gets mad at you.”

He’d given you a grateful smile then, and turned back to his hot chocolate with a marginally brighter look on his face.

“Belphie’s been having a lot of nightmares lately, so he isn’t getting as much sleep,” You say slowly. “I told him to go ahead and take as many naps as he has to. His needs are more important than schoolwork, after all.”

Lucifer takes a long while to answer, but you don’t mind. It’s only fairly recently that he’s really come to terms with the idea that he doesn’t need to be so hard on his brothers - that it’s okay to put their comfort before whatever image of respectability he’s trying to keep up for Diavolo. The change has been somewhat jarring, according to Satan, but it’s not an unwelcome one, and you’ll gladly take responsibility for it with your constant reminders and careful explanations that Lucifer’s younger brothers have their own problems that he needs to give more leeway for.

“...did he come to talk to you about this?” He asks finally.

“Yeah.” You can’t see his face, but you can practically hear the frown beginning to pinch at his brows. “I know it might not seem like it sometimes, but he does want to make you proud. He’s never wanted to disappoint you.”

He takes a deep breath and releases it with a low hum. “...Belphie has never disappointed me.”

“Seems that he doesn’t realise that sometimes, though,” You sigh, tracing the seams of his glove with your index finger. “He’s a good kid, really.”

Lucifer doesn’t give a verbal reply, but he does hum again. You shift slightly and turn to look up at him; he looks back at you with sleepy, half-lidded crimson eyes. “Take it easy on him, okay?”

He gazes at you in contemplative silence for a long while, blinking slowly like an affectionate cat. Finally, he nods, and you beam proudly, dipping your head to rest on his chest, carefully positioning yourself so that his buttons don’t dig into your cheek.

“I’ll speak to his teachers,” He says quietly. “We should be able to arrange something.”

You smile against the fabric of his waistcoat, taking his hand in yours and giving it a squeeze. “That’s progress. I’m proud of you.”

He doesn’t respond, but you know full well that he loves it when you say that to him. He didn’t in the early days of your relationship, mostly because he’d thought you were patronising him, but now that the two of you are so much more familiar with each other, he’s learnt to recognise that you don’t mince words; you say what you mean, and you mean what you say. Which is exactly why, as the Avatar of Pride, he absolutely loves it when you tell him that you’re proud of him.

Lucifer himself is deep in thought. Struck by a sudden warmth spreading through him, quite independent of the crackling fire before him, he wraps his arms around you, resting his cheek against your head. It’s at moments like these, when you’re so close to him, that he realises just how fragile humans like you are.

It terrifies him sometimes, knowing that the unforgiving march of time means that you cannot be with him forever. One day you will leave, and you will grow old and fade away without him, because, no matter how much he wishes otherwise, you belong to a different realm. You are not a demon, and he is not a human; your worlds can collide briefly, for a single, beautiful moment, but then they will continue to move in their own orbit - and perhaps they will never meet again.

Some would say that, for this reason, he never should have fallen in love in the first place. Relationships like yours have always had a sort of taboo, even in the Devildom, because all beings are not created equal; humans have such short, meaningless lifespans compared to demons and angels, such little power, always depending on leaders and faith in a deity that they cannot prove the existence of. That is what demons tend to think of humanity, and until he’d met you, Lucifer had felt similarly.

But your life has been anything but meaningless, and the power you hold over him and his brothers is far stronger than any amount of potent magic that any being holds. The seven lords of the Devildom would lay waste to all three realms should anything happen to you. 

Lucifer had never thought that he had the ability to love so deeply and so purely, but then again, he’d also never thought that a human like you could exist. It seems that he’s been wrong about a lot of things, and he can only pray that he will be wrong in his prediction of how this will end.

But you’re with him now, curled up against him with a content smile on your face. For now, you’re here, and while you are, Lucifer doesn’t want to waste time on worries.

Your story is yet to reach its ending, and if Lucifer knows anything, it’s that he will stay by your side until then. As long as your worlds are still connected, he will continue to love you, and he will love you long after your worlds separate again.

He’s sure of it.

[wattpadscapcons]

Hello there? could you please write headcanons for pico and tankman (separately, please!) with an s/o who frequently disguises themself as human, but is actually this giant-lovecraftian-angel-thing with a buncha eyes?

im new here, may i go by angel anon? (if its already taken, how about &-anon?)

Heya Angel Anon! When I searched up "Lovecraftian Angel" the images depict it being either made up of wings with a single eye in the dead center, or as a set of intertwined rings with several eyes with a soul fire in the dead center. Both are equally terrifying.

Tankman John w/ Biblical Angel S/O

- He fell for the disguise but had a very uneasy feeling when around you

- He chopped that up to be just being nervous when he caught feels

- When you transformed in front of him (your last resort for escape) he was dead silent

- The entire field of enemy agents was thrown into a panic at the sight of you, causing a retreat on both sides

- He was one of the only ones left behind along with Steve and a few others, some with their guns drawn and aimed at you

- "What even are you?" "A messenger for God." "They're an angel, John." "What are your orders Captain?" "Stand down, go back to base."

- If he didn't believe in god before this, he does now, not that it changes much for his mission

- "He has forgiven you several times John." "What was my existence for Y/N?" "To lead, inspire, and create." "And the others?" "I cannot say." "....." "I know this may feel like betrayal on my part, I was going to tell you. Believe me I was going to." "I really don't know what you expect me to say Y/N." "How you feel?" "I feel....nothing. That power of yours seems to have an uncomfortably calming effect."

- Doesn't ask you to aid him in battle, but you do on occasion as a last resort to end wars

=

Pico w/ Biblical Angel S/O

- Knew you weren't human the first time you two met, he didn't know why though as you appeared to be a normal person

- That uneasy feeling you emit makes him feel off balance (metaphorically)

- "Y/N." "Yes dear?" "I know you aren't human." "How did you...?" "....So that feeling I have isn't just instincts kicking in." "It's the holy light." "You're an angel then?" "Precisely." "Show me your true form." "I don't think that's a good idea-" "Y/N, please just do it." "Fine, but don't blame me for the nightmares." "What are you talking-....."?"

- He wasn't exactly afraid of you. If anything, he was just in shock

- "That's what real angels look like?" "Your kind seems to like to depict us differently most days, I find it rather sad." "What I've been taught has been wrong." "Not true, we have our rings, wings, and our soul. You've been told that." "But we're told that those rings are golden and hover above an angel's head, and that-" "It's still true that we can be seen like that. You were not exactly lied to."

- Questions your powers all the time

- Asks about God, as well as questions his lack of faith

- "I know what you were wanting to ask Pico, and he has forgiven you for your bloodshed. You should feel no shame for being you." "Y/N..." "Really he spared you half of the trauma you would've had if my kind had not stepped in." "But, I never saw..." "We are invisible to those who don't need to see us." "I don't...I..." "You don't have to understand. Just know he loves you. As he does for your friends." "Y/N, why are you telling me this?" "I am a messenger, I delivered his message. And, because, you need to know you aren't a monster." "...…"

- If Nene finds out? Let's not think too much about that.

[lepusrufus]

Double edged scalpel ch.5

Ch.1 Ch.2 Ch.3 Ch.4

Summary: someone please give Nicole a break for the love of Miranda. And there be smut y'all

---

Seeing Cassandra's softer side made something flutter within Nicole's chest. The brunette was a sadist through and through. Witness to that fact was the array of torture devices that littered the dungeons. Not to mention the prisoners she frequently killed, only to haul them on the autopsy tables in her study to be examined, chopped and sectioned by the both of them.

But there was an uncharacteristic sort of gentleness in the way their lips slid against each other, sharp teeth occasionally biting down on Nicole's lower lip but never enough to draw blood. In the way Cassandra would drag sharp nails against flushed skin, but not go beyond the pleasurable amount of pain. Even the glint in golden eyes when Nicole went over some old notes of hers on more tricky anatomy concepts. Having an exclusive look at this side of Cassandra felt beyond intimate and the thought almost made her miss when the brunette spoke from where she was leaning over a notebook.

"Okay let's just wrap this up, I have plans."

Nicole hummed, dropping the liver she was holding in a freezer bag. Most body parts were already bagged and ready to be picked up by Cynthia and her undercooks, they were just putting into practice some things the brunette was curious about. She dropped the now blood soaked leather gloves in the sink and went to sit by Cassandra, who was scribbling some final notes.

"In that case I'll go enjoy a cup of tea," she sighed. "Tea that I had to skip because someone was eager to start on this early."

Cassandra raised an eyebrow at her, accompanied by her usual smirk. "I meant plans with you."

Oh? That was new. The brunette laughed at Nicole's wide eyed expression and snapped her notebook shut. She took her sweet time putting it on the shelf with the others and checking the time, pretending not to notice the redhead's inquisitive expression. Then, she lifted Nicole’s chin with a thankfully not covered in blood finger.

"Don't get me wrong I love it here but," she grimaced, "it gets stuffy sometimes. Especially in summer."

Well, that much was true. The undergrounds of the castle were oddly warm, although not downright hot, compared to what one would expect from a castle. Pair that with the annoyingly humid atmosphere and having to wear a leather apron and gloves so as to not completely ruin your outfit and you got the perfect recipe for discomfort. She really ought to ask Cassandra about installing some kind of better ventilation down here.

"Meet me in the attic in about… an hour." She leaned down and their mouths were so close that Nicole could feel icy breath on her lips.

The attic? She's never been to the attic, it was not only off limits for most staff but also dangerous if rumors were to be believed. Not that she had the clarity of mind to voice any concerns when Cassandra finally leaned in to kiss her, complete with a nip on her lower lip that made Nicole’s breath hitch.

---

The fact that Nicole had no idea how to get to the attic could be a slight problem. She had asked Anita, but not only did she not know, she also seemed mortified by the idea. Another maid just gave her vague directions to look for a ladder on the top floor. As if that wasn't like trying to find the needle in a haystack. Or the needle in a giant castle.

She was just wandering around the top floor, praying not to stumble upon anyone who would be less than thrilled to see her there. A sigh of relief escaped past her lips when she heard familiar buzzing and steps coming towards her.

"Oh Cas-" she swallowed her words when she noticed red hair spilling from underneath a black hood.

"Nicole! What are you doing here hmm?" Her inquisitive hum was way too exaggerated the same way her fangs seemed too sharp when she grinned.

"I was just looking for Ca- lady Cassandra. She asked me to meet her in the attic."

Daniela's mouth fell open, almost forming an O shape. Then back to her characteristic giggle, almost as if laughing at a joke only she knew.

"What, you don't know how to get there?"

"...Not really," she sheepishly admitted.

And that was a mistake. Nicole would've preferred to wander the hallways until Cassandra eventually got bored enough of waiting and decided to come see where her glorified lab partner was. But her plan was ruined by Daniela wordlessly grabbing her arm and pulling her in the opposite direction she was going in. She even went the extra mile to partially turn into a swarm, which made Nicole's panic skyrocket. She didn't mind bugs. But having hundreds of them fly all around you, accompanied by manic giggling was a whole other thing.

Before she knew it though, Daniela let go of her arm, laughing a little at Nicole's stumbling. She gestured dramatically towards a ladder and said:

"There you go. Say hi to Cassie for me."

"Th- thank you my lady." And with a small bow of the head she grabbed the ladder and started ascending on shaky legs.

"And enjoy your date," she called out, once Nicole was at the top of the stairs.

Blushing, she decided to ignore the comment and start looking for the sister less likely to turn her into fly food.

The attic looked… old. It was obvious that people didn't come here often, although someone probably did clean it regularly as there were no cobwebs nor dirt on any surfaces, aside from some dust. It was full of neatly arranged boxes and crates, their contents as mysterious as the castle's inhabitants. Tentative steps took her across ancient floorboards, navigating old rooms.

"Rah!"

Nicole damn near jumped out of her skin, a string of curses spilling past her lips. "Jesus fucking christ Cassandra!"

The brunette only laughed, hands on her knees and pretending to wipe a tear from her eye.

"That's what you get for making me wait for so long."

"I didn't even know where the attic entrance was! Good thing one of your sisters came to my rescue." Nicole rolled her eyes at the last word.

Cassandra stopped laughing, eyes narrowing slightly. "Which one?"

"Uh- Danie-"

"Did she hurt you?" Cassandra grabbed her arms, golden eyes looking for any visible injuries.

Nicole just laughed softly, taken off guard by the display of concern. "No, no. Just gave me a bit of a fright, that's all."

With an eye roll, Cassandra guided her further into the attic, through more dusty rooms, until they reached a short corridor, light spilling from its other end. The room they entered was relatively small, almost half of it occupied by stacked boxes as if it used to be a storage room like the rest of the attic and nobody bothered to completely clear it out. A few pieces of furniture were also present: a couch with a coffee table in front of it and paintings leaning against a wall to collect dust. This room however had a window, left slightly ajar, that allowed you to see the mountains stretching on the horizon, crowned by the beautiful orange hues of dusk.

Nicole moved to the glass to take in the view, mouth almost hanging open, when an ungodly screech from outside made her backpedal straight into Cassandra.

"What the fuck was that?" She asked, eyes widening at the sight of flying creatures circling the towers.

"Mother's flying guard dogs."

"They sound the same way I'd imagine the souls of the damned do." Nicole didn’t take her eyes off the ghoulish creatures, almost as if keeping eye contact would dissuade them from attacking.

Cassandra just shrugged. "Wouldn't be too far off. Also here." She sat on the couch, gesturing towards a cup.

Nicole went to sit by her side, grabbing the mystery cup. She frowned slightly when the steam reached her nose, bringing with it a pleasant minty and honey aroma.

"Tea?"

"Since you were so disheartened about having to skip it earlier," Cassandra averted her eyes, seemingly finding the curtains very interesting.

After a long sip, she let out a content sigh. The warmth was more than welcomed, despite the weather. She set the cup back on the table and turned her attention on the brunette, now fidgeting with the corner of a pillow.

"Thank you," Nicole said, leaving a small kiss on her cheek.

Cassandra smiled and turned around, locking their lips in a kiss that at first mimicked her gentleness, but soon turned hungry when dainty hands made their way to the brunette's nape, pulling her closer. She shifted them both, pushing Nicole down on the pillows littering the couch, until she was laying on top of her, legs on each side of her waist. Her focus was on leaving a trail of nips and kisses down Nicole's neck when the redhead jumped and barely stifled a yelp at another screech from outside.

"Ugh what the fuck is today, scare me out of my mind day?"

"How are you scared of these but countless dead bodies don't phase you?" Cassandra laughed, sound muffled by her position with her mouth against Nicole's neck.

"I used to work on corpses, not on ugly gargoyles that could chew my face off!" She gestured wildly at the window and the few creatures visible outside.

"You what?"

"You...didn't know?" Nicole couldn't help a giggle at Cassandra's confused expression.

"How was I supposed to know?"

"I thought your mother told you already. Or your sisters," Nicole shrugged.

"They knew?!" And, after something seemed to dawn on her, "Oh I'm gonna kick both their asses."

Nicole couldn’t help letting out a small laugh, placing her hands on Cassandra's cheeks and, with a pout for dramatic effect, "Right now?"

As much as the sight was both funny and endearing, the warmth starting to pool at her core was making her beyond impatient.

The indignation in golden eyes was replaced by an all too familiar glint and black painted lips went back to their work on Nicole's neck. Sharp fangs pierced the skin there, just enough to draw a few drops of blood and a whine. After licking every last bit of it, Cassandra's lips moved to the collarbones and lower, hands slowly starting to undo the buttons of Nicole's pesky uniform that was in the way.

When both the button up and the skirt were discarded on the floor Nicole tangled her fingers through black hair and pulled Cassandra in for a kiss. Her free hand went to the back of the dress, pulling down the zipper and guiding it off of the brunette's shoulders. Once both of them were left only in undergarments, Nicole pulled back to look up at the brunette.

"If I knew I was supposed to dress up I would've asked the chambermaid if there's anything fancy in the uniform stash," she said, taking in the beautifully intricate lace of Cassandra's matching bra and underwear, complete with a giggle at her awful joking.

The brunette only raised an eyebrow. "Mhm I can take care of that. Not like you'll need these for long though." Her hands reached under Nicole's back to unclasp her bra and in mere moments that too was on top of the pile of clothes on the floor.

Then Cassandra bent down to crash their lips together, tongue slipping past Nicole's lips when a wandering hand elicited a gasp from her.

Cassandra was by no means a patient person. Quite the opposite actually. But teasingly dragging her nails across sensitive skin only to feel the girl under her squirm and whine when her hand just won't go where she needed it made waiting all the more sweet. Slender fingers started to toy with the edges of Nicole's underwear. After a groan against her lips and an impatient tug of hair, Cassandra finally gave in, slipping two fingers inside her. She felt Nicole arch into her, a broken moan escaping past her lips when she broke the kiss to let her head fall back into the cushions. Cassandra took that as an opportunity to kiss the length of her neck, occasionally stopping to suck or bite at a spot, enjoying every gasp and moan she drew out of the redhead.

With Cassandra's rough pace it didn't take long before Nicole was clenching her thighs around her hand. Cassandra kissed her, swallowing her moan as she came.

The small room in the attic, Cassandra's drawing room she would later find out, was the perfect secluded spot. They spent the rest of the evening enjoying each other. First evening of many.

[sevensins-stuff]

For Your Love

(A fan rewritten Valentine's day event)

Beelzebub walked into the House of Lamentation one day before Valentine's day with a large ball of black something that he received while he was out. Sitting in the common room was Lucifer and mc who were calmly sipping tea together while all the other brothers slowly streamed into the room. The last of them all being the avatar of gluttony who entered with a bright smile and the large black ball at his side.

Mc set their cup on the small table in front of them before pointing at the black mass. "What you got there, Beel?"

"It's chocolate," he replied. "The owner at the candy store I always go to gave it to me for free."

Mammon stalked up to the large nugget of chocolate and broke off a small piece of it before putting it in his mouth, then swiftly spitting it out with overexaggerated sputtering. "It's so bitter!"

Beel nods. "It's 99% cacao and way too bitter for me to eat."

"I heard that dark chocolate is good for your skin, but if it's that bitter, I don't think I want to try it." Asmo shudders slightly at the thought of the lingering bitterness in his mouth.

"I was thinking about sweetening it up anyways. The owner said that all I needed to do was melt it, add milk and sugar to it and then reharden it. I was wondering if you guys could help me since it's a lot of chocolate to make."

Mc shrugged, standing up from their seat. "I'll help. I don't mind." The contagious smile from the sixth born caused their lips to turn upwards. One by one the brothers gave their word and in the end, only Belphegor and Lucifer had decided not to join the party in their chocolate making endeavor.

"I almost forgot," Beel began as they started moving towards the kitchen. "This chocolate's also enchanted. If you touch your lips to it before feeding it to the person of your choice, then that person will return your feelings." The air around them shifted slightly as seven pairs of eyes suddenly landed on mc. They only smiled in return and shook their head.

"It won't work on me. This happens everytime, but you guys can try."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beel, Mammon, and Satan took on the role of chopping up the giant ball of chocolate while Levi, Asmo, and MC each worked on melting the chocolate and mixing in their own ratios of milk and sugar to create a sweeter dark chocolate and a more classic milk chocolate.

Once everything melted down, they dipped their spoon into the glossy liquid mixture and brought it to their lips for a taste. This chocolate was so much better than anything they ever had back in the human realm. They dipped the spoon back in for a final stir without thinking about it before pulling it off the heat.

Once the counters had been cleared and wiped, Mammon and Asmo worked on laying out molds to pour the chocolate into and from there all they had to do was wait for it to harden and then they would be ready for eating.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Valentine's day finally rolled around and the group was excited to see how their hard work had fared. It paid off to say the least. Mc chose the bar that they poured their mixture into and inspected it. The matte finish of it combatted the glossy look it had while it was melted, but it was sturdy and surprisingly light. But how did it taste?

All eyes were on them as they took the first untempered piece and it was just as sweet as they remembered. Proud of their finished product, they shared a piece of it with everyone around and the two late comers that still happened to make it just in time.

The perfect balance of sweet and creamy melted across their tongues in blissful chocolatey goodness and it was enough to make their hearts beat double time. Leviathan was the first to shy away from eating anymore chocolate. "M-mc, do you make chocolate for a living or something?"

They turned to look at his half hidden, blushy face with a slightly arched brow. "Not as far as I know. Is it really that good?"

"It's way too good! I-I don't think I can have another bite!" Levi dashed out of the kitchen leaving them with more questions than answers. They then turned to everyone else around them and noticed that they too started to become a bit more shy and blushy.

"What's gotten into you guys?" Immediately, their own question was answered by a small replay of their memories. Of course! They touched their lips with the chocolate when they tasted it yesterday and mixed the enchanted spoon into the mix, affecting their whole batch. They froze for a moment, looking over their faces once more before chuckling awkwardly.

"Um, I'm gonna go see what's wrong with Levi. You guys can have some more chocolate if you want." With that, they left the brothers and ran upstairs to check on the third oldest's condition.

.

.

Leviathan

[doublebill]

Suptober 2021 - Day 1: Harvest

Dean smiles to himself as Castiel pulls another spindly carrot out of the ground and beams up at him with pride.

It had been too late in the year to plant anything worthwhile when they first moved into the small dilapidated house, but Dean had cleared the whole yard, buying in vast amounts of compost and digging the whole place up for Cas to plant whatever he wanted the following spring. Considering all of the time, and effort, and hundreds of dollars they'd ploughed into the garden, Cas had managed to harvest about $10 worth of usable vegetables.

Despite this, it was all worth it. Dean would do the exact same thing every year for the rest of his life if it meant that Cas would look that happy, pulling underformed root vegetables out of the ground.

"Maybe we could make a stew." Cas said, nodding to the half a dozen long, pencil-thin carrots he cradled in his arms as he headed back up the new wooden steps into the house.

He placed them in the sink to wash off the dirt and Dean wrapped himself around his angel's back.

"Yeah, Cas. Stew would be great. If you want to go and wash up, I'll get started."

Castiel turned in his arms and gave him a gentle kiss before he headed to the bathroom to wash the sweat and grime from his body. Angel he may be, but they both knew that Cas' mojo was waning, he didn't waste it on things like wishing himself clean anymore. There was something nice and homey about that, it made this feel more real, like they were real people. Dean had spent decades not fitting in with society, being on the fringe and now he had a normal little life. He worked at the hardware store in town, Cas volunteered at an animal shelter a few days a week, and spent the rest of his time, pottering around the little house and garden.

Dean sighed at the carrots and turned on the faucet to rinse away the earth and gathered the other (store bought) vegetables to make the stew.

He remembered a story of a man who offered to show a poor family how to make soup from a stone in return for shelter and food for the night. Cas' carrots reminded him a little of that. He chopped the carrots, along with onions, and potatoes, and half a dozen other types of vegetable, putting them in a pan over a low heat and went to work on making some bread.

The house was getting there. He did pretty much all of the renovations himself, getting tools and materials at cost through his job was helpful. It was slow work, but it was making a space that reflected them. It had soft couches and a good TV, bookshelves, houseplants, Cas had even bought Dean an acoustic guitar from a thrift store in Kansas City for last Christmas. It was a far cry from the giant, austere, concrete bunker, but what it lacked in space and hunting resources, it made up in heart and comfort. There was a spare room, and a pull out couch so there was room for Sam and Eileen to stay when they came by for dinner every couple of weeks. There was an old Nintendo system that Dean had picked up for a steal in a garage sale for when Jack dropped in.

Dean was kneading the dough when Cas walked back into the kitchen, wearing soft pajamas, his damp hair sticking up wildly. He walked over to the stove and gave the stew an appreciative sniff. Dean plopped the dough in a large bowl and covered it with a towel to let it rise. After rinsing his hands, he pulled Cas with him into the living room to slump onto the couch. He ran his fingers gently through Cas' hair as he lay back against Dean's chest.

"Maybe we could get chickens. Then we could get eggs all year round. Maybe we could trade some with our neighbours as I don't seem to be terribly good at growing them."

"Eggs?"

Cas snorted "Vegetables. I am fully aware that this wasn't the bountiful harvest I was expecting when we planted them."

"We're both new at this, it'll get better." Dean pressed a soft kiss to the top of Cas' head.

And it did.

With the end of the great cosmic Winchester saga, Dean had been worried that normal life just wouldn't be able to satisfy him but he couldn't have been more wrong. He made friends, regular meet-at-the-bar-for-a-couple-of-beers friends. They went to barbecues and became well-known in their community for being a kind and friendly (if slightly odd) couple. He had his friends, he had his family, and he had his Cas.

That winter, he made a point of learning a Skynrd song on the guitar. On Christmas Eve, by the light of the fire, he serenaded Cas with Simple Man. At the end, he put the guitar aside, knelt down in front of Cas, and asked him to marry him. 

With tears of joy in his eyes, Cas said yes.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34184017