#if someone has points against what I've said here I'm going to politely ask you to DM me for a conversation

[soupacool]

I'm not trying to derail I am venting on my personal blog. No tags or hope for engagement or whatever.

But why the fuck am I seeing this sentiment popping up again and again today blaming transmascs in a situation where a cis man is being transmisogynistic? Why does this point get continuously reiterated? Like I know I have my own bubble but overwhelmingly transmascs are in support of the transfems on this site who are clearly facing a very transmisogynistic issue. But then to blame transmasculine people for disunity within the trans community when shifting blame on to us for something we are not responsible for?? I'm not saying that transmasc people cannot partake in transphobia and misogyny and transmisogyny but I dunno it just seems unnecessary to me in this moment.

This is not the main issue at hand. I am not pretending this is a bigger issue than the transmisogyny built into the systems of Tumblr and the internet and everything. But it is deeply frustrating to me

[a-student-out-of-time]

An Important Reminder In Trying Times

Hey everyone, Mod Bubbles here.

I know that I've said over and over that I don't like talking about politics on here, but I really feel the need to say this:

This Is Not The End.

I understand things probably seem really bleak right now. A lot of people are going to be hurt by this, and the sheer amount of fearmongering and worst case scenarios are inescapable. But the country and the world are not going to change overnight. To be honest, it may not change very much at all in the next four years. I'm not a political scientist, so I can't tell you that for sure. There's a lot to be concerned about.

What I can tell you, as a student of history, is this: not only have we survived this once, we have survived this every time.

Think about it this way: every single tyrant, every single right-wing representative, every single emperor and colonial power, every corporate scumbag and power-hungry lunatic. No matter how many of them have ever come to power, held onto power, and tried to make themselves seem invincible, not a single one has ever held back humanity's progress and not a single one has proven to be invincible.

There were countries throughout history, especially in the 20th century, that fell under brutal dictatorships and saw countless lives lost. Did the people just give up and accept it? Fuck no they didn't. They fought back. Many of them lived to see democracy restored to their lands in their lifetimes, or fought to see it restored in their children's.

From Europe to Latin America, while many countries still have their issues, they endured and their people have survived. Their governments were not invincible, just as none ever have been.

Regardless of the outcome of this election, the world will go on. People will not just roll over and accept whatever horrible things happen, the fight will continue and we will do everything in our power to carry on as we always have. We'll carry on to achieve bigger and better things.

Let me also be clear: if you feel the need to cry, please cry. If you're afraid, don't pretend you're not. If you're angry, allow yourself to feel that anger. But if you're seriously contemplating giving up or hurting yourself, please don't.

You may hear all this news and ask yourself, "Bubbles, what's the point? What can I do about all this?" I've felt that way too, I have for a long time. I understand completely. It's scary and overwhelming, but I'll tell you exactly what you can do to fight against that: you can be kind.

Do you want to know where the most tangible change in the world begins? It's never at the top. It begins with people like us on a communal level, where we reach out to help others. Whether that means we help our neighbors, our friends, or any strangers we can.

Going out of your way to start fights, looking for someone to blame based on the flimsiest justifications, and just being cruel because you're angry, those aren't how you change anything. Those just add to the problem.

Here's just some ideas on what you can do instead:

Get away from the news, stop doomscrolling, mute doomers, and turn the TV and news apps off. This will get you out of a negative feedback loop that'll make you feel worse and more powerless, which is what they're designed to do in order to maximize traffic.

Remember to eat, sleep, brush your teeth, take a shower, take your meds, and do everything else you need to do to stay healthy.

If you or someone else really feel like leaving the country for your own safety is best, you can still work do so. But please don't convince yourself that if you can't, it's over.

Give back to people as much as you can. Show the people in your life who support you that you care, and that all that they do for you matters.

Donate to good causes you believe in.

Stand up to bullshit whenever you see it.

Do not give up on your dreams and ambitions. One bad leader does not mean your future automatically ends. Stop worrying about any potential apocalypse in the future, because you can do that even on the best days, and instead work toward a future that you CAN achieve.

There's this pervasive and very inaccurate idea that it's only the president who gets to enforce policies on the country. This ignores governors, the House of Representatives, Congress, mayors, and the countless other leaders involved. And it ignores you.

You do not have to spend the next 3 years and 364 days doing nothing but feeling miserable. In fact, that's the last thing you should do. Fear and despair are the weapons they wield, and they only have as much power as you allow them to have over you.

If your view of politics is that you just have to vote for the "right one" and then everything will be utopian, or that if people vote for the wrong one" then we're headed for a terrible dystopian nightmare, I have to tell you that that is incredibly reductionist and also very dumb. I can also tell you from personal experience that it's not them who make the real changes where it's needed.

A friend sent me a video that really opened my eyes on this situation: Adam Conover, the guy behind Adam Ruins Everything, said he's not worried about all this. Why? Because he and some friends were able, through their own power, to make real positive changes in their community. They were able to bring homelessness down in their district by over 38% through their own efforts.

And he's right that, as a silver lining to all this, it made more Americans than ever take a stand against all the horrible shit they were seeing and get involved with solutions.

Speaking from my own experiences as well, when Hurricane Helene devastated my area, it wasn't the politicians who came and repaired roads and power lines, it wasn't them who brought in food and supplies to everyone, and it wasn't them who worked tirelessly to save people still in need. It was everyone in our local communities.

The people at the top have never really cared about anything more than your money and your vote, but the people around you care more than you may believe they would. Hell, even strangers on the internet care more than you'd believe.

Now, even if you've made it this far, you may be wondering "What about when he starts outlawing and banning things?" To that, I say look at Prohibition and see how well that went. Politicians have only ever operated under the idea that banning something will make it go away, and it always does the exact opposite. And if you're still worried, you can get involved with organizations that fight to support these things being available and regulated.

But by now, you may also be wondering "What if I can't get involved? What if I'm too young or I don't have the money, or my parents won't let me?"

Then just be kind.

Stop looking for enemies to blame. Don't martyr yourself for some nebulous cause or the idea that your suffering increasing means the rest of the suffering in the world will go down. Don't torture yourself by telling yourself that you didn't do enough.

Show compassion, show support, show love and genuine care toward people who need it, including yourself.

"But there's so many shitty people in this country and the world, why should I-" Stop thinking that way. This isn't about them, this is about you and how you can make a difference. There will probably always be shitheads and power-hungry morons, but that does not negate the fact that you can choose to be different. You can choose to be kind.

Kindness is a sword that you have to learn how to wield. Wield it responsibly and use it to help others. No matter how small or insignificant it may be, YOU DO MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

I say all this as a 29-year-old who spent most of his life feeling scared and miserable about so many current events, convincing myself I'm useless and selfish because I was worried about so much and I hated myself for all of it. And I've decide I'm not going to do that anymore.

During the last right-wing era, I managed to help build a whole community out of my love for Danganronpa. I created friendships, relationships, and there are people alive right now because I chose to do so. Because I chose to use that community for kindness. I want to keep building from there by going into streaming and reaching out to more people.

I won't lie to you and say that I'm not scared, because I am. But I'm also not going to let fear change who I am. I want us all to be better to ourselves and others, because that is how you defeat hate. It starts with you.

And if you're still concerned, let me share with you a quote from The Great Dictator, a movie made in 1940, when World War II wasn't even at its height yet:

To those who can hear me, I say - do not despair. The misery that is now upon us is but the passing of greed - the bitterness of men who fear the way of human progress. The hate of men will pass, and dictators die, and the power they took from the people will return to the people. And so long as men die, liberty will never perish…

Please take care of yourselves out there, everyone. We'll get through this, just as we always have.

[ecoterrorist-katara]

you act like your fandom isn't responsible for shitty racist behavior towards irls liiiike dont be a hypocrite pointing fingers at everyone except your own ilk lmfao

I was initially going to write a snarky response, but upon reflection you sound pretty young and I don't want to get into a pissing contest with someone who is likely a minor. Instead, I'm going to share my philosophy on how I engage with fandom and explain why it doesn't make sense for you to come to my ask box and demand that I answer for people who I don't even know.

My approach to fandom is entirely hedonistic. 1) Fandom is not, and never will be, my personal milieu for activism, and 2) I'm not responsible for the behaviour of people who happen to share my preference in a ship; I can only control what I do.

On 1), I come to fandom for escapism and indulgence, and these two qualities of fandom are completely incompatible with my approach to activism. Activism must be rooted in the real world and often demands doing things you don't want to do. That's like...the polar opposite of what I want to do on Tumblr.com.

Sometimes I incorporate analysis of oppression and justice in my fandom discussions because I find them interesting, but that's still about me and my enjoyment, not about oppression and injustice in general. A lot of my life has been dedicated to structural injustices, whether as topics of study or as systemic forces to organize against (more accurately, I spent most of my adult years striving to combine the academic and the practical facets), so obviously they crop up in my discussions, but my engagement in fandom has never been about activism and I've been quite clear about that. For example, I may talk about decolonization in the context of ATLA, but I harbour no delusions that my salty complaints about Bryke are, in any way, relevant to furthering the decolonial project.

On 2), notice that in my response to your last ask, I never claimed the entire Zutara fandom only consists of people who never did anything wrong. I only claimed that I, personally, strive to behave like a reasonably decent person in my fandom interactions. Fandoms consist of literally thousands of people, if not tens of thousands, so of course people in my (and yours, and everyone's) fandom are capable of shitty behaviour -- but like I said before, I'm not the fandom police. It's not a role I'm interested in taking on, nor one I'm arrogant enough to think I should. I don't try to be a role model at the club or at the grocery store; in a similar vein, I'm not facilitating or curating or shepherding the Zutara fandom. I just hang out here, same as everyone else, and I'm not going to insult my followers & my peers' intelligence by saying "PSA: did you know it's not okay to say shitty and racist things to people?"

My responsibilities in fandom extend to following basic fandom etiquette and interacting with posts and people that don't contradict my values. I sometimes repost salty things about specific ships, or occasionally I'll interact with Zutara antis who come to me, because salt can be fun in moderate doses plus I have post-COVID POTS so I need a lot of salt anyway. Every time I have interacted with a hostile Ka/taang shipper, it has been because they came to my post, my blog, or my tags to stir up shit. Even so, I'd never go to a Ka/taang blogger and expect them to do something. I have, btw, received messages asking me to highlight/expose certain Ka/taang shippers for their politics or things they've said, and I don't publish those either, so there's not a whole lot of fingerpointing going on here in general.

I'm going to stop responding to your asks, but I hope you can reflect on what exactly you are trying to get out of fandom, and what kind of behaviour you think is productive and generative for you. I'm not saying everyone should follow my personal fandom engagement philosophy, but I am saying you can't impose your philosophy onto me.

[mlm-mod-taka]

Hi there! I'm here to request a little something I've had bouncing around in my head a while and I feel like you'd do a great job at writing it! I'd like to request Taka, Gundham, Fuyu, and Kiyo with an S/O who's basically a giant compared to them and is suuuuuuper affectionate and friendly. Like the first time they met, the reader picked them up and basically swooped then into a hug raving about how adorable they are. You don't have to do it ofc, but if you agree to I CANNOT wait to see the

HAVING A BIG, AFFECTIONATE, FRIENDLY S/O • taka, gundham & fuyuhiko x gn reader

first off, i just want to say i am so sorry that you had to wait for so long, i just got back from my two year long break. second, im also sorry, however, i do not write for korekiyo, so i simply didn't include him. i do apologize for not asking if you wanted to replace him with another character, this request has been pending for so long that i decided against it. third, this is more a story in bullet point form than actual headcanons. despite all of this, i hope you can still enjoy this long awaited request.

tws/cws: yelling, cursing, threatening and violence. (mostly during fuyuhiko's part)

|| -> mod taka <3

at first, kiyotaka will admit that he was quite intimidated by you. seeing someone extremely taller than him isn't an everyday occurrence. yes, many other people were taller than him, but not by such a large degree, usually.

however, if he stood next to you, he'd seem like an overgrown child. so, naturally he was on-edge whenever you were near him, since you could probably easily beat him up if you wanted to.

but he had to remind himself that he was the ultimate moral compass! it doesnt matter how strong or large you are, he will discipline and scold you when it was needed. he will never back down from a fight when it comes to morals, even if he could easily lose that fight.

when you two first met, he decided to make the polite decision to introduce himself. once he was done with his maticulously-worded greeting, (that he had planned last night) he was expecting you to respond in a rude tone, filling the delinquent expectations that he had made of you based on your appearance in his head. but instead...

he was met with the biggest, tightest, and closest hug of his life. his first thought was to hug you back, which he was about to follow, until he remembered that you were in a public space and this would technically be considered as pda.

once he realized that revelation, he immediately pulled away from the hug, scolding you about touching people in public without permission. while your hug was extremely warm and welcoming, he forced himself to keep up his own rules.

you just stood there, very still while he gave you a lecture about being physically affectionate with someone you barely know. he also proceeded to go on a mini rant about the negative effects of pda, but you werent listening to any of it.

you were mainly just focused on how he seemed very passionate about keeping the peace, which made him look weirdly cute. people often look very adorable to you whenever they were talking about something they cared alot about, which is what ishimaru was currently doing.

you interrupted his planned speech about keeping ourselves civil, to compliment him about how cute he looked. taka immediately stopped in his tracks, looking at you like you just spoke a forbidden sentence.

"...pardon?" kiyotaka asked, but it sounded more like a flustered squeak he made out of surprise. you repeated your comment about him, watching his face slowly turn more red, realizing that you were being serious about what you said, and that you weren't mocking him like others do.

after the initial shock wore off, he reacted exactly how he expected you to, which was scolding you passionately again. however, it didn't sway your mind, he still looked very adorable to you while he was practically going teacher-mode on you because you called him "cute."

what you didnt expect, however, was what he said right when he finished telling you off. "thats all! i hope you have learned your lesson!... and while i don't agree with your methods of doing so, i do appreciate the compliment." he added the last part on with a rushed shout, then immediately left, trying to hide his red face from you.

from then on out, you actively seeked taka, and tried to befriend him, which he accepted. you still don't tone down your affectionate-ness and compliments at all, but he seems to be scolding you less and less. in fact, he seems like he anticipates them now, which makes you happy. little did you both know, that this friendship would lead to so much more.

gundham is the same as taka. he was intimidated by your large stature, and general... bigness. however, gundham tanaka is no coward, he will challenge anyone who dares compete against tanaka the forbidden one!

he walked up to you, with extreme confidence, and started his usual menacing speech about how he was a more powerful entity compared to you "mortals". before he could even finish the first sentence, you interrupted with a sentence that caught his " mighty" act off guard.

"aw, you're so adorable! like those hampsters that are on your shoulder! you're almost as cute as them!" were your first words to him. before his mind would even catch up to the strange sentences you just uttered to him, you grabbed him and pulled him into a bear hug.

gundham needed a solid few seconds to compose himself before he speaks at all. the devas are all squirming in his scarf, also caught by surprise from the strong hug you gave them. once he does process the situation enough to not look like a shocked puppy, he immediately starts thrashing in your large arms.

"release me from your armed trap at once, mortal!" he says in a mix of rage and panic. you quickly let him go, feeling a slight pain from how haphazardly he was moving in your grasp, and also because he didn't seem like he wanted to be hugged, if the sentence he spoke to you was anything to go by.

when he was released, the first thing he did after dusting himself off was restart his original speech of him being the supreme overlord of ice, but this time, he added that you are a very bold human for having the gal to touch someone so "highly superior" with such carelessness.

...or something along those lines. you weren't sure. your ears were only processing a muddled version of a few of the words he was saying, the rest was a blur. mainly because you weren't really paying attention to what he was going on about, you were just focusing on the cute, confident look on his face. along with the cute hamsters resting cozily in his scarf.

gundham stopped talking once he realized that you weren't looking him in the eye, or even anywhere near his face. you were staring at his neck, so he looked down to see his friends, then shot a sharp glaze at you after realizing why you weren't paying attention to his great speech.

"why are you looking at the dark devas of destruction, mortal? rather than listening to the words im gracing you with? you are not worthy to be in their presence, or mine." he continued death glaring at you, crossing his arms while waiting for your answer to his question.

"oh- im sorry... my lord? i was just admiring how cute and fuzzy the... dark devas? looked!" you gave the hamsters a small wave while speaking. you didn't know why he was speaking strangely and giving his pets such uncommon nicknames, but you didn't mind. you thought it was a little cute, actually.

of course, gundham was used to the compliments towards the devas. however, he wasn't taking the adjectives "cute" and "fuzzy" very well. they were evil! they were his partners in crime! how dare you call them such belitting names? before he could scold you again, you quickly swept the rug from under him again.

you quickly butted in, and started unconsciously showering him in compliments. calling him well-spoken, cool, dressed nicely, had cool hair, handsome, and such. you also added how his voice was very pleasant to listen to, and that his eyes were very expressive and clear.

as the flattering statements added on and on, he got more and more flustered. his slight stuttering from being caught off guard by the first two quickly because full-on sputtering with his face almost becoming as red as mahirus hair.

before you could make him even more speechless, he took the very little confidence he had left to attempt to make his usual "super big and bad evil" goodbye statement, but a very shortened and messy version escaped his lips instead, with him quickly scattering away before more of his pride was taken away by your giant cursed goodness.

while you were left confused as to why he left so suddenly, you quickly bid him adieu, continuing on with your day in hopes that you two would meet again, and maybe, just maybe, you would get along with each other.

little did you know that he was secretly plotting your demise for daring to treat him like that, muttering his evil plans to the dark devas, feeling that he needed to avenge them because of how you described them as if they weren't his wicked subordinates!

...deep down though, he would be lying if he said he wasn't looking forward to seeing your large, smiley self again. you were one of the few people who didn't scrutinize his personality, and he greatly appreciates it. maybe, when you acknowledge how truly devious he was, then, you could be acquiantances. or something deeper than that.

lets be honest, fuyuhiko would really really dislike you when he first meets you. he has this ideology that people who are positive and kind are fooling him, trying to catch him off guard and trap him with their fake happiness. given his family and who he is, he was taught to be skeptical of almost everyone, so it wasn't much of a surprise when he was skeptical towards you.

everytime you even attempted to get near him, he either yelled at you to back or else he'd shank you, or peko would step in, quickly telling you to leave with her hands already on her sword handle in case you try to push it.

you would try for weeks to even have a slight chance of talking to him, because he is the only person out of your class that you haven't had a personal connection with. heck, you even started to have a slight bond with peko when she wasn't busy protecting fuyuhiko!

if you were being honest, you were genuinely starting to give up on having him warm up to you. you knew that no matter how hard you try, some people will still find ways to dislike you. you thought that this would be one of those unfortunate cases, and you were on the edge of accepting it.

until that one night. you were having trouble sleeping, and nothing seemed to be working. you knew that it was probably too late for anyone to be awake right now, so you decided to take an evening stroll around the school. maybe the walking would tired you out.

you walk out of your dorm, only to see kuzuryu starting absent mindedly at the stars in the late night sky. he looked so... at ease. the sound of a door opening and footsteps started him, and his attitude quickly did a 180, turning aggressive.

"what the hell are you doing sneaking up on me like that?! are you gonna try to fool me again, huh? with your fake smiles and over-the-top hugs?" he yelled, paying no mind to the fact that it was 4am, and he could wake someone up.

you reassured him that you weren't going to hurt him, but to be honest, you were hurt at the accusation that it was fake. you wanted to speak your feelings, but you felt like that would make him more on edge, so you just ignored that hurt for now.

disregarding your word, he told you to stay far away from him, pointing at the very end of the balcony he was leaning against. you did what you were told, not wanting to agitate him further. to be honest, this is probably the nicest he's been to you so far. usually, he'd just tell you to fuck off, so you weren't about to let this rare opportunity to talk to him slip pass you.

after a few moments if silence, you decided to ramble a bit, maybe that'll warm him up to you. you talked about everything you could, random stuff you thought of, all the way to deep philosophical conversations that would make you ponder at night.

fuyuhiko didn't look like he was listening, if anything, he looked as if he was spacing out and using you as a white noise machine. however, that was better than his usual response of him threatening you, so you kept going.

eventually, he said something, cutting you off mid-rant. "you know, you don't have to keep up the act right now." "what do you mean?" "i know you're lying, just admit it to my face so you can stop using all your energy trying to convince me you're a good person."

ouch, that stung. but, this is the longest he's talked to you in private, you couldn't let this go. "well, what if i told you it wasn't a lie?" you smiled at him. "bullshit. no one is ever that positive or nice."

"well, i am. and i'll prove it to you if you'll let me!" "pffft. yeah right. do you just want me to believe that someone as big as you isn't a secret spy or assassin? don't even try."

"im not. i can prove it to you." you were so close. he was talking to you, he was actually talking to you! you would have preferred if the conversation was more positive, yes, but he was talking to you! you were getting somewhere!

"really?" he paused, you could see his eyebrows slightly furrow in thought. "fine, since these other students are making things boring as hell, i'll let you prove it to me."

...it was that easy? all you had to do was say that you were willing to prove it at a balcony when it was 4am? it was a bit anti-climactic, but hey, you weren't complaining. "great! you won't regret this!" you walked to hug him before he put his tough guy act on again.

"don't. touch. me. i said i'd let you prove it to me, not use me as a personal cuddle bear. with how different we look, i think you'd crush me." "ah, not much of a hugger? sorry, i get it. should've asked first."

he yawned. "yeah you should've. anyways, i'm hitting the sack. kill me in my sleep and ill haunt you forever." fuyuhiko spoke as he walked back to his dorm room.

"i won't!" you replied, waving him goodbye. you know it was small progress, but you're getting somewhere. you'll definitely gain his trust.

[matan4il]

The ICJ ruling went about as well as I was expecting. No call for a ceasefire and no ruling on whether the war is a case of genocide, but Israel still has to send in aid (which it was already doing) and try to contain civilian deaths. All in all it said nothing new, made no decisive decisions and it just feels like we're back where we started but now Israel has to send in a report in a month. What are your thoughts on the ruling?

Hi Nonnie! Thank you for this ask. Yes, it went just as we thought it was most likely to go, and the explicit decision on the case was never going to be given during the decision of the provisional measures. If it's okay, I wanna combine my answer to you with this ask as well:

I've seen a few people mention that the ICJ not calling for a ceasefire probably indicates that the judges don't think a genocide is occurring at all. After all, if they believe a genocide is actively going on, why would you allow the side committing it to continue the fight? Granted, I'm seeing both sides claiming the ruling to be a victory for them. So, who knows at this point what any of it means?

Okay, so my feeling about this is complex. I mean,

On the one hand, I very much acknowledge that this is the best resolution on the subject of the provisional measures that we could have gotten. Anon, you're right. If there was any indication of an actual genocide, the ICJ would have decided in favor of Israel having to stop its fighting in Gaza. There apparently is a precedent, the ICJ did issue a provisional measure deciding on the end of Russia's fighting in Ukraine, based on the convention for the prevention og genocide. So yes, there's no reason why the ICJ wouldn't do the same here if South Africa had a strong enough suggestion of a case.

The reason why I still don't feel great is that I think the very discussion is a perversion of justice. It's like... think of a situation where you know there can't be a just result, because the court is biased. Think of a scenario where a political rival of the government is put on trial for murder in North Korea, where the judges are known to serve the interests of the government. To not be executed would probably be considered the best possible result, but it's still wrong that such a biased trial exists, that someone would be put on trial for merely being a political opponent.

Yes, each side got some things it wanted and lost some stuff (SA got the ICJ to ignore its abuse of the genocide convention, and got some provisional measures when legally the whole case should have been thrown out, while Israel got the fact that the provisional measure to stop the fighting, the only one the ICJ could grant that has real weight and impact, was not issued), but at the end of the day, Hamas celebrated the decision. Because it understands that even if no practical change comes from the ICJ's decision, it's another step in its war, which it runs parallel to its terrorism, to delegitimize Israel's very existence in the global public's mind. And on the most basic level, if an antisemitic, genocidal terrorist organization is happy with the ICJ's decision, I find it hard to be.

I hope this kind of explains why, even though I'm aware that the result was the best one we could get, it's still awful. To go back to how judge Aharon Barak, the survivor of an actual genocide, put it, the whole trial was like judging Able for Cain murdering him. Hamas should be put on trial. Hamas should be called out on, and persecuted for its genocidal intents and actions against Jews around the world. Hamas should be put on trial for crimes against world peace when it intentionally started a war against Israel. Hamas should be put on trial for war crimes perpetrated against its own Palestinian population when it has killed them intentionally, and intentionally put them in harm's way, to get killed in the fighting, when it used them as human shields. And anything less than that is a perversion of justice.

Thank you both, like I said, I do hope this helps. Take care!

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[galvanizedfriend]

hii Yokan! i miss you!😭

how are you? how is work?? I hope everything is going well<3

rn there's a little Comic Con in my city, and it really did help my mood!! (even tho I throwed up 6 times and fainted during the morning of the first day due to the heat and lack of iron🥲) 2 days down, 2 more to go 🙏

ANYWAYS! I know you've been going through a writer's block lately, and I read a post that said something about asking/commenting about the fictions to help the "stucked" autor, SO!

I've been re-reading TW III (shocking, I know) and those little hints about married!kc are just 😭😭 my heart melts, really, although... I was never really sure you'd get them married, mostly due to Care's speech to Cami about how Klaus supposedly sees weddings, and because I remember you saying that you weren't planning on giving them an actual marriage, but rather the closest thing next to it. I checked to comments to see other thoughts, and I saw one of you reply saying that you were completely against married!kc at the start, but then you were slowing changing your mind about it...

so, what was it that made you say "fuck it, I'm gonna ring the bells"?? is it because many people asked you to do it, so you are throwing us a bone, or is it something else?? I'm really interest on hearing the process of your change of heart <3

have a good one, friend <3 love you xoxo

I don't know if I am eloquent enough or if my train of thought makes much sense, but I will try 😂

Also grab a chair because this will be a long one. Be careful what you ask me, I do not know how to shut the fuck up 🙃

Objectively, I still think Klaus is not the marrying kind (in canon context, at least). That man has been alive for a thousand years. He's the vampire of vampires, one who sees humans as a lower species. He's used to getting what he wants by conquering and subjugating because he can. Why would he ever submit himself to an inherently human institution that, throughout history, has served as a tool for various types of social, political and religious control? The ceremony itself doesn't mean anything to him. He probably thinks it's ridiculous and performative, not to mention extremely frail. You can just change your mind and get a divorce, or the good old spouse murder, and then what? What's even the point?

(Just to be clear: I'm not personally preaching against weddings and marriages here btw, it's just how I think Klaus might have seen it.)

If you look at it from the sentimental side, Klaus spent almost a thousand years saying that love is a sign of weakness, a character flaw. He carried his siblings, the only people he genuinely cared about, inside coffins because he didn't trust them enough not to leave him, betray him or end up captured and killed by one of his enemies. Now, why would he want to marry someone, thus exposing yet another vulnerability to be exploited?

Having said that 😂

When we first see Klaus in TVD he's trying to surround himself with a whole new OP supernatural species that will have no choice but to stand with him. They will protect him, they will go to war for him, do whatever he asks them to and they will never leave (or that's what he thought, anyway) because they don't have a choice. That is the only way Klaus knows how to trust people: by completely removing their capacity to challenge him. That's how paranoid he is.

But as the story progresses, and especially with The Wolf in particular because it takes their relationship much further than the show, Klaus realizes there is more than one way to earn people's trust. I feel like that's one of the pillars of his relationship with Caroline. He could've just compelled her (in TVD, not TW because she's a witch), but he never did because he wanted more from her than obedience. All of the things he liked about her - her personality, her honesty, her fire, her loyalty - would've been essentially erased or made meaningless if he'd compelled her. Which puts her in direct opposition to how he related to his hybrids, right? He pretends to be fine with people who have no choice but to follow him, but what he really craves is more real than that. He surrounds himself with people who will worship the ground he walks on after some forged "gratitude" for releasing them of their curse, but he is fascinated by how gutsy Caroline is to look him in the eye and tell him the things that no one else will dare to. What he really seeks but doesn't have the courage to admit is that he wants someone who will choose to be with him. And that's the difficult part, because it can't be conquered or taken, it has to be earned.

Klaus comes from a place of paranoia and extreme distrust of everything and everyone around him, especially after Mikael in New Orleans, and he feels very isolated and alone. He tells Stefan about that, right? The loneliness of immortality. When The Wolf starts, in spite of how he and Caroline were having a bit of a thing before it, he's not sure she would want to stay with him. Actually, he thinks the first chance she gets, she's gonna bail. It's why he's mad when he thinks she wants to terminate the pregnancy. It's not about the baby (it's never about the baby), he couldn't care less about the damn baby at that point, it's the fact that he thinks she's trying to get rid of him, as if that pregnancy is the one thing that is holding them together at that point and so if she's no longer pregnant, she doesn't have to be with him. What I'm very inarticulately trying to say is that his initial approach to Caroline being pregnant is the same he had with his hybrids, as if the baby is a version of a sire bond. It's crazy and dysfunctional, yes, but it's how Klaus rationalizes it, how he thinks he gets to keep people around him - either through daggering them or giving them no choice.

Slowly, Klaus internalizes the fact that Caroline is choosing him. She tells him that a few times throughout the story, and even when he's hallucinating her at the beginning of TW4, because that's something that she has said before and that has stuck with him for reason. She could've left him at any point, but she didn't because she wants to be with him. It's a choice that she has made not because he forced her to, but because she's in love with him. She protects him, she fights for him, she walks through hellfire for him because she wants to, not because she must. He has earned her trust and her love and her loyalty. And that is something that is new for Klaus in his one thousand years of life, at least at this magnitude and with this much clarity and certitude.

So I think when I started writing TW3, which was them in their domestic era, it started to feel like something Klaus might actually do. Not just because it obviously does mean something to Caroline and he would basically do anything for her (even though she never asks for it, which in itself is something, because Caroline comes from relationships that made her feel so insecure and unsafe that she would've held on to a ring like a lifeline, but with Klaus she simply does not need hard evidence to feel safe and reassured, she knows how Klaus feels about her, she's very comfortable in their relationship, she knows that what offers her means a lot more than a thousand weddings to other people ever would - even though she does still love a good wedding lol), but because it suddenly makes sense to him. Not the big party, or the tradition of it, or making it official or anything of the sort, but as a way to externalize what he feels. There is a symbolism to it that while not ideal, it might be the closest to thing to expressing just how devoted he is to her and how she is, pure and simple, eternity for him. When that comes from someone who has lived for as long he has, and who has been as cynical as he was for as long as he was, it does mean something, even if nothing else does.

There is a territorial factor to it as well, of course. 😌 He's a very possessive man and so he wants everyone to know Caroline is his, and it's why it first came to him during the thing with Jackson, but it's more than just that. If it was just about that, he wouldn't do it. He is at a point where he no longer has any doubts about how Caroline feels for him (although there will be a little something something on that front at the beginning of TW4, just because they've been apart for so long, but it will be quickly dispelled).

The most sacred thing for Klaus was the vow he took with his siblings when they fled Viking Falls. They stuck together through everything because of that. He knows the value of a vow and a promise. And he wants a version of that with Caroline. It's the first time in his life when he contemplates genuinely offering that to someone other than his family. There are a million ways he could go about it, probably, but he knows asking her to marry him is the one that will be most representative to her, because of the age where she was born and how she grew up, etc.

And so that is why I decided that Klaus was going to buy a ring even though I crossed my heart and hoped to die a million times for years when people asked me about that. 😂 I just think it's the natural course this story has taken. It's long enough that it eventually made sense to me that he might do it.

Does any of that make sense???? I don't know! I just typed my stream of thought and hoped for the best and now I'm afraid to read it again, so apologies if it's just crazy words.

Now if only I can get back to writing and actually get to that part. 🥲 Pray for me 🙏

THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK! 🙃 Here have a pretty married Klaroline gif.

[lorynna]

Seperate post because I am unable to reblog yesterday's debate about sex-selective abortions:

Down below is the link to the full blog post if anyone is interested in reading the whole thing. I am just going to reply to a few of the absolute insane and brainrot takes by @aux-squiggle :

1) "I'm sure you'd (correctly) chastize me if I went on every post with someone having bleach & dyed hair crying about how hair bleach harms the hair and saying "yes I understand it's your body and I'm not against your autonomy but hair dye is so stupid" at some point one realizes that it's just my opinion on hair dye and I should shut up unless explicitly asked for my opinion, which at no point were you asked for your opinion on what I'll do or (what you think) makes sense to do with my body."

Starting right off, it's actually the first time I ever spoke about sex-selective abortion on here, so me "going on every post" is wrong and intentional inflammatory wording. The comparison between dyed/bleached hair and abortion lacks heavily - it's also ridiculously stupid. I'm sure what you do with your hair and the policies surrounding it is an equally political and complicated topic like abortion. Even if you should go around telling people "Sure, do your thing, dye your hair but it's unnecessary in my opinion to promote the beauty industry by partaking in it, because it makes money off of women's insecurities" you have the right to speak your opinion and reblogging another person who's stating their opinion, who's stopping you? Surprise, you can speak your opinion even without being asked for it! Some people will agree, some won't, that's the way it is! I'm sure you don't ask people you have differing opinions from each time if you please may reblog their post, or do you? This is the internet babe.

2) "Next thing idk where you've gotten this "trivilization of abortion thing" or making it seem like I have said abortion is a cutesy procedure with absolutely no harm but as poodle has said it's also very safe. Idk if you think every mention of abortion has to come with a full list of disclaimers but if you read me saying "I will get an abortion if it's a male" to mean "lol guys I get abortions every weekend let's go down to the spa for a pampering plus abortion trolololol" that's your own tbh. The issue is you view being pregnant with a male fetus (as opposed to a female one) as a trivial difference, when it's not trivial to me, many other radfems and indeed for many libfem women."

Surely not every mention of abortion needs to come with a huge list of disclaimers, after all you're not their doctor but idk about you, talking about "i will get pregnant and abort as many times as I have to, until I conceive a daughter" does sound very trivializing to me. Lastly, sure the future sex of anyone's baby means something different to anyone and a certain preference or even the so called "gender disappointment" is real and valid, but is it really the solution to spin the wheel on each pregnancy again and again until you get what you want?

3) "As for the race, sex, other attributes thing, as I've already established, since fetuses are not people and are not going to suffer if their mom gets rid of them, I don't care. I couldn't give a fuck if a white woman aborts a half POC baby tbh like that's her business. No POC suffers from her actions. I also refuse to have a half white baby.

Obviously that's easily addressed by me choosing a black African sire but if I were in a consensual relationship with a white male (would never happen because I don't date males but ygtp) I would abort because I don't want to birth a half Euro baby, as statically they pair up with Eurodescendants themselves. I already know you probably also think that's stupid but I have no wish to contribute to my oppressor's group in that regard either, even by a generational separation, as I know the most likely choice Afro/Euro biracial children make as opposed to monoracial black children.

To me, mixed (b&w) people are black, but ¾ white people are white. Having a monoracial black child means my grandchildren (if any) will also be black (mixed b& something else, or monoracial) meaning the family makeup is what I'm most happy with. Idc what my great-grandchildren (if any) are, I'm probably dead anyways.

So yes I would intentionally make choices, including that of abortion, that bring me the life I'm happiest with. Other women who do that are not my business, I don't care. They could abort because they don't like the star sign their kid is expected to have. A birth that brings the mother sadness, no matter how small or how frivolous the reason for sadness is, is not good and if she aborts to avoid that, all power to her."

That's....really interesting...to know. You have established you would not blink an eye for whatever reason people abort, be it their future baby's star sign, their sex or their ethnicity & race. Your reasoning for not wanting a non 100% black baby being that according to you they statistically are more likely to pair up with eurodescendants making you worry about your family tree becoming "less black"? Then you're going on about "who is black" and "who is white" according to you.

To clarify to anyone who does not know my stance on abortion: I am pro choice, I support every woman's right that does want to get an abortion, despite her reasoning. An abortion as the process itself is not tied to a moral aspect, as the fetus in these stages of development where an abortion is possible, is a non conscious clump of cells. However I do think that the reason for why a woman decides to abort can be criticised. For example: A woman wants to get pregnant and succeeds. She finds out the baby would be born in February, making it an Aquarius, so she aborts it. My stance on sex-selective is similar to how I view cheating on a spouse. I don't think cheating is right but I wouldn't want it to be illegal.

"Regarding pro-choicers saying "no one aborts for fun and silly reasons" and prolifers potentially using this as a clapback, what do you want me to do about that? There's far superior pro-choice arguments, and further to that, these are only fun and silly reasons to you. These are monumental to other people (including me), and since it's their womb they're the only one's who's feelings matter.

Again as I've told you, I will not censor myself for the sake of prolifers not getting offended, I genuinely could not give less of a fuck what they feel. They will always find a reason to hate on the pro-choice movement and since we understand prolifism is actually about tying women down to men and control of women, everything about both my and your lifestyles upset them. There's no placating their bs. If you are upset that I won't censor myself, keep it to yourself."

Making it seem like I gave a fuck about pro lifers and said "oh look at this poor pro lifer being so upset about your words!" instead of "you are actively harming the acceptance of the pro choice movement". You don't understand that the activism you are making is nothing the world is ready for yet. In most countries, abortion is completely banned and women who go through with it nonetheless are going to prison or are even paying with their lives. I am genuinly glad, that you are living in a progressive country where you can access abortion easily and safely and where healthcare even pays for it. Most people do not have that kind of privilege and pro choice activism firstly needs to focus on gaining acceptance by introducing people step by step to the movement, coming to them with facts and good arguments. You've got to understand your far rad stance is not realistically applicable as of right now.

"If in the 0.00001% chance the genetic test is wrong (which have functionality been at 100% accuracy for years, btw I've found several Irish based tests so I don't have to use an international product) at 8 weeks (and the tests after that) then I get several scans from 14 weeks on that also confirm the sex (and would be told if there is a discrepancy). If at those tests they find it's actually a male and the Y chromosome was somehow not picked up, I go to the UK and get an abortion then. If somehow it's not found out until 24 weeks+ (I'd have an easier time winning the lottery) I go to New Zealand for a 3rd trimester abortion. There's probably something wrong if it was missed that many times, at every single scan and test.

Have you prepared for nuclear war Lorynna? Have you decided what to do if a gamma ray burst sanitizes exactly half the planet (the side you're not on), and have you got a contingency plan on what to do if suddenly 4 billion people die? What if global supply chains collapse tomorrow (an actual likely thing tbh). Nuclear war and supply chain collapse at least are far more likely than a fetus being missed as male not only on the first genetic test, AND the tests after that, AND every single ultrasound after that. Idk about gamma ray burst though, probably the same likelihood.

If by some hellish demon reality I get stuck with a son then obviously I raise my son, as I've discussed previously in the linked essay."

Insanity. Proceeding to ask me about every possible catastrophic event that potentially happen and asking me if i prepared for it because yes, sure - it is exactly as unlikely as your baby to turn out being a boy despite all of your fancy tests. But glad to know that should the tests fail, you'll raise your son?

"" There's no reason to fight" "but I do have an opinion." As established, your opinion was unnecessary and uninvited, so it's very likely people will get mad at you if you call major life choices "stupid" without providing any reasoning beyond your feelings. Like I said, telling me what I should be ok with residing in my womb is nothing short of foul, and frankly unasked for."

Oh no! How evil of me, I dare to have an opinion and according to you it was unnecessary and uninvited! Oh man, so many people are going to get mad at me for calling major life choices stupid without providing any reason at all! At this point I'm almost 100% sure you're illiterate and typed your responses while blindfolded and with your left pinky toe. Claiming my arguments are feeling-based rather than objective criticism. And sure, because I said that if you were mature, you'd approach an intended pregnancy, accepting that both sexes can be the outcome of that and that a person who wants to get pregnant in my opinion should be okay with either, I am the worst!

[piglet26]

Alright, Is the Star Wars Fandom Sexist?

As you probably know Daisy Ridley signed onto do another Star Wars film. I welcomed this..... mostly. If they don't reunited the Dyad I'm very curious as to what would be the point (more on that later.) Well, I saw this quote from a recent interview of hers, "I think my take is things get blown out of proportion and the interactions I've ever had with people have been nothing but wonderful and supportive," Ridley said. "I've only ever been embraced. And I think we're going to make a great film."

Now whether or not Ms. Ridley actually feels this way.......she's intelligent enough to say just this. Undeniably, all of the men who have talked shit about her for the past 7,8 odd years will now have softened to her for simply not holding them accountable. Hey, that's the biz kids. Don't make enemies out of your audience. No man wants to be called a sexist even if he actually is one.

Is there sexism in Star Wars? Yes and no. It has never been a straight answer. Now if you ask a lot of men in the Star Wars fandom if they are sexist..... they'll say no. Why? Princess Leia of course! Padme! Strong women who directed men, issued orders and politically led. They did and do support these women. In fact, if you had asked me if the fandom was sexist prior to The Sequel Trilogy I would've said that the SWF is one of the most progressive fandoms for women and has been since the 70s!

Where did it all go wrong?

Well, maybe this

Or, this

Maybe just good ole fashion paranoia. Personally, I think it's a combination of all three. The minute Disney bought Star Wars the fandom was primed to distrust it. Change, for better or worse, was on the horizon. Hell, even worse, corporate change. It's Rage against the Machine raging FOR the machine. Least we forget how Star Wars started...... as a "fuck you" to corporatized assembly-line movie production.

However, we are not her to discuss whether The Sequel Trilogy was good. Debatable..... with the exception of Reylo. That's just iconic. We are here to discuss how on earth Daisy Ridley ending up bearing the majority of the responsibility for its failures. Maybe even more importantly the "Feminization" of Star Wars.

A sane person could tell that. The same people screaming "Star Wars is Dead" for the last seven years are still saying the eulogy. Still going on whining and complaining about it. There is a general rule when franchise start to go off the track - you ignore it was ever made. Godfather 3? Tokyo Drift? Never happened.

If you don't like what Star Wars has become then the first person on your shit list should be it's creator. George Lucas. George could've signed over Star Wars under the guarantee that whatever outline he produced for The Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Disney HAD to stick to - he didn't. He could've signed on a producer - he didn't. He could've picked someone else except Kathleen Kennedy to replace him - he didn't. Somehow George Lucas has escaped any responsibility in what his life's work has become. Maybe the fandom got it out of their system after the Prequel Road Rage.

News that George Lucas's treatments were thrown out and the extended universe being cancelled didn't exactly calm down the public.

Maybe the next person should JJ Abrams and Kathleen Kennedy for for thinking that there was something wrong with Star Wars. Star Wars already was diverse. It already HAD strong females. Yet, there they went finding problems that didn't exist. Why? Money. Disney has a powerful female/family demographic. Star Wars a strong male demographic. Disney sought to combine the best of all worlds in one franchise and they were the company to do it. Look at what they accomplished with Marvel!

Then the announcement came that there would be a female protagonist. A female Jedi to be exact. I thought this was different and interesting. The men did not. What they saw in there head was THE FORCE IS FEMALE in flashing bright lights. This was it. Confirmation. Star Wars was about to get pussyfied. From the get-go Daisy Ridley's Rey was to be a focus, a target, for the mistrust, uneasiness and rage from the men.

Let's me be clear men are ok girls liking their stuff. As long as girls are not in a position to influence whatever it is they like, or rather "ruin it." Can you blame them? If a bunch of straight dudes came in and started writing Sex and the City I'm telling you- they'd ruin it.

The Force Awakens finally arrives and curiosity was able to lure in even the most salty man. Not to mention the possible joy of seeing Han, Luke and Leia on screen together again. TFA is a perfectly decent film. There were two glaring choices in this film. One, Han is killed. Two, Rey beats Kylo Ren at the end. All things considered we should not have been surprised what the internet had to say. Rey was a Mary Sue. Men who didn't even know what a Mary Sue was were even saying this.

The term “Mary Sue” was first coined in 1973. A young main character, usually a woman, who was portrayed as unreasonably gifted across every discipline: intellect, combat, the arts, etc. This character would often become respected (and maybe even loved) by main characters and would end the story by saving the day in heroic fashion.

You don't have to like Rey. You don't have to love her. Rey isn't even the greatest character ever developed, but come on! I wonderer if the people criticizing her even watched the movie. I heard criticism that Rey was too likable! Well, she's the protagonist. She's too pretty! That's a bad thing? She's too nice! She comes off really brash and naive actually. She's the greatest pilot ever! She flew once and not that well. Most of the criticism around Rey was disingenuous and petty as hell.

Many critics have taken the lazy route of she has no character arc or character, but that’s not a very observant take. Her yearning for family and her desperation for her parents to return, while understandable, made her vulnerable to Kylo Ren. Her loneliness made her ultimately vulnerable to anyone who would be nice to her. Now I understand there was no consequences for her faults. However, there can't be both criticism. She either doesn't have a personality, or, she has one, but doesn't suffer consequences for it.

“How could she fly the Millennium Falcon so well?” “How could she beat Kylo Ren when she’d never used a lightsaber before?” “How could she resist Kylo Ren’s interrogation?” The film answered most of these questions. Ironically, no one questioned the 8 year old Anakin Skywalker or the farm boy Luke Skywalker for being amazing or great at anything because of The Force.

She grew up defending herself in melee combat. Her quarterstaff is not a lightsaber, of course, but it was established early on that she has the instincts and the reflexes to hold her own in a fight. While I don't agree with Rey beating Kylo Ren I understand how it was accomplished. Pure, dumb luck. It was luck that Ren was physically and spiritually crippled during their confrontation. Not to mention he had the hots for you. Finn was able to hold him off mostly because Kylo was toying with him, but when he grew bored Finn ended up face first in the snow. No one questioned how Finn the janitor could wield a lightsaber.

Let's talk about Finn, or rather John Boyega. All things considered pretty lucky guy. He got a likable that he played well and got paid well. You wouldn't know it by listening to him. He complained bitterly. He attacked the fans. He attacked Disney. He attacked America. He got off Scott free with fandom. Most remember him with nothing but fondness. Maybe because he is black people feel slightly uncomfortable going after him. But, the women? No problem. Even when fans hate male characters, they talk about what they hate with nuance.

Daisy Ridley did her job and she went home. She carried on beautifully and respectfully with what she was given by the production team. That is all any actor can do. The same would apply to the girl who played Rose Tico. Yet, criticism of what was happening on screen started to bleed onto the actresses in real life.

Mark Hamill shit talked the Sequel Trilogy - fair, enough. But why did you sign on? It he because he needed a job? Hondo wasn't a great leader. I agree. But, countless people ended up losing their lives due to Poe because he refused to listen to the female authority around him. Where was the fandom with their logic bitterness scorecard? The majority of the criticism I heard (Literally several videos on Youtube) was criticism towards Hondo for not telling a newly demoted soldier all of her plans.

Anywho Rey has this new movie coming out...........okay. Not sure who wants to come back for it other than her. After TROS and the fans most co-stars seem good doing other things. OG characters are killed off. There is one person with stunning jet black hair, 6'3, plush naturally red lips, a big dick, freckles and a heroic run that she's in a dyad with that would make this whole movie worth it. Do I faith they'll do the right thing and pay Adam Driver whatever they need to to bring him back? No. Cause there is a little bit of an agenda. For some reason love in the Star Wars universe doesn't do very well, but for the woman it's none existent. The concept that a strong woman doesn't have to die alone seems odd to the very people that want equality for women. For example I saw this comment, "Rey Skywalker is her own character and her continuing story doesn’t have to revolve around Ben Solo. Daisy Ridley’s return shouldn’t be overshadowed by fan expectation over Adam Driver returning."

Yes, it does. This film needs to work. I cannot stress that enough. You know people want to see this film fail. Reylo isn't purely for sentimental reasons (I WOULD SEE MY DYAD REUNITED FOUR TIMES IN THEATRES) Reylo is the biggest marketing advantage Disney Star Wars has..... you knew that when Solo flopped. Do the smart thing, put these people on mute and give us a iconic fight fuck scene.

Rey also wear clothes appropriate with her environment and match the physical needs of what she needs to accomplish like her male peers. Logical and refreshing. I hear the men mostly complain about the lack of hot women in their fantasy.

We could also talk about the sexism Carrie Fisher faced from the not only the studio, but the fandom for the crime of getting older and gaining weight. Her in a metal bikini is already in the spank bank - she contributed enough.

Again, neither Carrie Fisher nor Daisy Ridley in a smart world could ever really own that. Anymore than the Rose Tico actress could. Worse, they could never really tell the Fanboys what they really think of them. I love me some Fanboys, I do, but they aren't a perfect group of people. They just criticism everyone's work like they are. We're suppose to ignore the giant dump they take on anything and everything that comes out. I genuinely think the people beyond The Star Wars Sequel Trilogy sought out to create a great story. To honor what came before. In many respect they did. They aren't George Lucas though.

There is legitimate criticism towards Disney for how it has handled the Star Wars franchise. Currently it can't exactly be be described as quality over quantity. The writers seem like they are writing for early 00s Disney Channel rather a complex space political fairytale. Characterization has not been wonderful. Again, it's not simple. While Disney has not steered the ship perfectly. I would argue there was an audience sitting in ill will and waiting to be disappointment.

[9leaguesofmirrors]

The Favour (a Ross Gaines x Joseph Lisgoe fanfic)

What if Pauline refused to help Ross in season 3 episode 1 and she left before that very scarring scene ever happened? In this version, he decides to call in the help of an old acquaintance

This one is a little more ✨spicy✨ than my other fics, but it's just fade-to-black, I'm not quite brave enough to write actual smut

I love how well these GIFs go together, like Ross just made a smug comment and Lisgoe's sick of his crap 😆

**********************************************

"I've come here on my fucking time off, so this better be important."

Ross couldn't remember when he started being on speaking terms with Joseph Nigel Lisgoe, but it happened. They weren't friends, but they also weren't exactly enemies. Well, Ross thought Lisgoe was a sadistic cretin who used violence to make up for his lack of brain cells, and Lisgoe thought Ross was an arrogant bastard with no concernable personality. Other than that, they didn't hate each other

Hence why Ross didn't see an issue with enlisting his help. Since he didn't have his number, he had to track down and slip a note under his office door that read I need your help, we'll discuss at my house followed by his address

Which is how he got here, face-to-face with a very unhappy Lisgoe at his front door

"Make yourself at home."

Ignoring this statement (which he could tell was merely being said out of politeness), Lisgoe all but barged past and leaned against a counter in the kitchen

"Your house reminds me of you: dead on the inside."

"I didn't invite you here to insult me."

"Couldn't you at least have gotten dressed? You look like a right twat in that dressing gown."

"I think," Ross said as he went to the cupboard and poured them both a glass of wine "that we should focus on the real reason I asked you here."

Lisgoe curled his upper lip slightly, as if he would rather have been anywhere else at this point, but took the glass anyway. He took a sip, watching Ross closely

"You gonna tell me or am I supposed to guess?"

"Someone I hired for an undercover job has decided to go against me."

"Fucking hell, OK James Bond!"

This was met with a glare, not that Lisgoe seemed to be all that bothered. In fact, he has a shit-eating grin on his face that suggested he found this whole thing funny

"I don't know why you're laughing."

"You're so far up your own arse, no wonder you talk a load of shite!"

"I'm going to ignore that. All I'm asking is for you to get rid of her, I'm sure that won't be too taxing on you, what with the very little brain power you possess."

"I'm not a contract killer." Lisgoe put his glass down on the counter "I may be a crazy bastard, but I'm not some assassin."

"You're the only one with enough of a craving for violence and lack of empathy to do it."

There was a pause. Lisgoe took another swig of wine

He'd never admit it out loud, but it was refreshing to have someone challenge him. As much as he liked being the one everyone feared, there was something about Ross' lack of fear that both frustrated him and kept him oddly entertained

"What's in it for me?"

Ross considered his answer, but his thoughts were somewhat hazy, clearly more interested in why Lisgoe was staring at him. He was completely unreadable, which was off-putting to say the least. And yet it, for some reason, made him feel more drawn to him. He wanted to know what it would take to make him snap - what he would do when he did

"Who says you're getting anything?"

"I'm not doing this shite for free." Lisgoe sneered, taking a step towards him "It comes with a price."

They weren't incredibly close, but it was enough for Ross to briefly catch his scent. Sharp, spicy cologne which seemed to fuse with the underlying leftovers of cigarette smoke. It wouldn't be much of a surprise if he'd smoked before he came here; he could see it now, Joseph Lisgoe outside the door with a cigarette in his mouth... sucking it gently... his eyes closing as the smoke fell from his lips

Ross put an end to that thought immediately

"I could tip off the police to the rumours going around Royston Vasey about your violent tendancies, I'd say guess how many years you'd get," he put a hand on Lisgoe's shoulder and looked at him with pure mockery in his eyes "but I'd hate for you to hurt your head."

"You'd tell the police, would you?" Lisgoe retorted in a soft voice that made it sound more like a dare than a question

"What if I did?"

Despite not being the most intellectual of people, Lisgoe could read emotions on their faces and bodies easily. It's what he used to get under people's skin before he inevitably threw a punch. There was a stillness in Ross' body language that told him he was telling the truth - he respected that, in a way. Another thing he caught onto was Ross' eyes. They seemed to drag their way up and down his frame, meeting his eyes with a subtle, sharp intake of breath. He was being looked at in a way that was rare for him, yet something in him was very satisfied that it was directed to him alone

But there was something else. Something of a spark in his eyes, something that said I'm onto you

He wasn't about to give him the upper hand

"I don't ask for much." His voice was softer, slightly rough "But, if you need me as badly as you clearly fucking do, then you'll have to convince me."

"That depends on two factors: what you want, and how you want me to convince you?" Ross chewed his lower lip, an action that caused Lisgoe's jaw to tighten

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

Satisfied with the edge he'd taken from him, Ross put down his glass. As he did, he made sure to let his hand brush against Lisgoe's, relishing in the way he jolted away

"There's a grand history of people who, daggers drawn, eventually find each other attractive." He said innocently, tilting his head to the side slightly as he stared into dusty blue eyes "What do you think, Joseph?"

Nobody called him Joseph

It's was Lisgoe or, if you worked for him, Mr. Lisgoe. A silent agreement among the inhabitants of Royston Vasey. He didn't know what was worse: the fact Ross had the balls to break that rule, or the fact it sounded so nice in his voice

"I think you need to remember who you're talking to. You might get away with saying what you like to the thick pigs at the dole house, but I'm not that easily fucked with."

The venom in Lisgoe's voice shouldn't have affected Ross the way it did. He wasn't scared, but it pierced through his chest and pumped molten fire through his body

"I assume," He put his hand deliberately over the man's wrist, his voice steady "you know what you want in return for all of this?"

Lisgoe took a step forward and stared. It was like he was considering not the offer, but him. Finally, he spoke again:

"Anywhere between 10,000 and 20,000 is great."

"Excuse me?" Was Ross' response, trying not to look too disappointed as Lisgoe pulled away "You expect me to pay you that amount for one simple task?"

"You're not asking me to have a little chat, are you? You want me to get rid of a bitch, and the fact you contacted me means you want it to hurt."

"You're hardly worth the oxygen I breathe, let alone £10-20,000."

"You've got a set of balls, haven't you?"

"I want you to leave."

"Now hold your fucking horses, I'm not done!"

He moved over to the address book on the table and opened it, slightly surprised by how empty it was. Surely this guy knew more people than WORK and MOTHER

"So, is your dad an asshole? Or is he dead?"

"What are you doing?" Ross asked, clearly not appreciating the question

"You got a pen?"

"Don't pretend you can write."

"Fuck off and get me a pen! Wait, shut up..."

"I didn't say-"

"Here's one."

Lisgoe had taken a pen from inside his suit jacket and scrawled something onto the page. Upon inspection, Ross noticed it was a phone number with the initials JNL next to it

"As a debt collector, I never like doing favours without getting something in return."

"And what exactly do you have in mind? If it's more money, I'm out."

"You doing anything tonight?"

Of all the things he expected to hear, that wasn't one of them. Regardless, he shook his head neutrally

"I'll be back in an hour." Lisgoe put the pen down on the table "For the love of shite, get dressed."

"What's the occasion?" Ross sneered in response

"The occasion is, when I get back, I'm doing whatever the fuck I want with you."

Ross' chest caved in. He couldn't think of the worse reason: actual fear or... OK, maybe the second option. Either way, he was trying not to show it on his face

"What exactly are you implying?"

That made Lisgoe laugh a little. Ross went to question him, but was quickly silenced by being tugged by his dressing gown into a searing kiss. It was forceful, not that it came as a surprise - this was Lisgoe, after all. And Ross certainly wasn't complaining. Especially not when his lower lip was being pulled between Lisgoe's teeth

"Unless you have another stupid question, I'll see you later today"

Before he could turn and go, Ross had grabbed him by the wrist

"You said earlier that a debt collector always gets something in return, would you also say they'd rather get it in a timely manner?"

"I don't remember what I said, but sure. What's your point?"

"There's clearly something between us. A certain... heat-"

"Alright, Ozzy Wilde."

"Oscar Wilde, but that's beside the point. What I'm saying is what's the point in waiting for it to cool down?" In a moment of boldness, Ross reached for Lisgoe's jacket. Without breaking eye contact for more than a second, he unbuttoned it slowly "Unless you're too scared to-"

Once again, his words were cut short and Lisgoe's mouth was on his. It was frantic and raw, neither one of them was interested in being gentle. Ross' hands were warm, Lisgoe's skin was cold, which came together to form what could only be described as electricity. Without breaking the kiss, Lisgoe was being pushed against the kitchen counter and, well, Ross was dropping to his knees to return a favour

*********************************************

"So, what's the bitch's name again?" Lisgoe asked as he threaded his belt through the loops of his trousers

"Pauline Campbell-Jones," Ross sat down on his sofa "she's completely egregious. She's violent, foul-tempered and vulgar."

"Right, I suppose you only find those traits sexy in men."

"Let's make this clear, I only did that to pay you back."

Lisgoe didn't know why he got the urge to ask, but he sat down beside Ross and looked at him with slightly furrowed brows

"Do you fuck everyone that you ask to favours?"

"No."

"So I'm a special case?"

Ross looked Lisgoe up and down contemplatively, then replied "Yes."

"Can you say anything else? One-word responses piss me off."

There was another silence. Ross stared at the wall, thinking things through. OK yes, maybe part of the reason was to get Lisgoe on board with his plan, but did he enjoy it? Maybe he did. So what? Since when did sex mean anything? That being said, even with all that aside, Lisgoe wasn't completely insufferable to be around. In fact, he was one of the few inhabitants of Royston Vasey that he could see as being something of an equal to him

"We don't have to be strangers, I suppose. You did give me your number for some reason."

"Ignore it then," Lisgoe shrugged as he got up "I just gave it to you so I could tell when I was done with her."

Then there was an odd moment of pause

Ross stood up and they were facing each other. It was awkward and tense, but not altogether unpleasant. Just strange. Almost as if neither of them were in a rush for it to be over

Suddenly, Lisgoe snapped out of it and headed for the front door. Ross went to let him out. It was all very formulaic, as if nothing happened between them. And surely, that's all it was

Nothing at all

Once he'd gone, Ross went back into the kitchen area and looked at the number written into his book. Then he saw it

Lisgoe had left his pen behind

If he hurried, he could probably catch up and give it to him. Or he could wait for him to realise and come back for it

Ah well, what's the rush?

[kats-comfort-corner]

Unexpected Ch 85 Theory Post

Spoilers under the cut

*deep breath*

HE KNOWS

HE KNEW THE WHOLE TIME

I FUCKING KNEW IT

okay so i don't actually have any definitive proof or substantial evidence beyond this and almost 20 years of an obsession with this character's personality specifically

HOWEVER

Chapter 79

Key Points:

Shikamaru checks in immediately after seeing the weirdness and asks about what happened "when they were attacked by Boruto".

The translation might be a little weird here, 'cause I don't completely understand Eida's response - which is a shame because I think most of the analysis works better when you can grasp the nuance. Anyway, lol.

She starts off saying "Nothing really" - there's a pause where Kawaki tells her to tell Shikamaru that the Hokage's dead. So, jumping from, "Nothing, all good" to "oh shit actually the Hokage is dead, my bad" is maybe slightly suspicious.

Chapter 80

Key Points:

Eida says rather bluntly that the Hokage has been killed by Boruto, but she's under duress with Kawaki's hand to her throat, so maybe she's not sounding like she usually would. Just a guess.

"There's a very high possibility" is not the same as "The Hokage has definitely been killed". I don't think Shikamaru 100% believes Eida, but I do think the possibility is upsetting enough for him to act on it regardless.

Shikadai is actually the main reason I am fairly confident Shikamaru knows something is up because this kid sees all this weird shit that doesn't add up and you know he talks to his dad about it.

Shikadai sees Sasuke take off with Boruto and you think he's not going to go to his dad like, "hey what the fuck?"

They're Naras, y'all. Come on now.

Chapter 81

Key Points:

Shikamaru is the Hokage now, apparently.

Okay, that's actually a huge factor to consider as well because I don't think he would take that position if he didn't believe Naruto was still alive and able to take it back as soon as he was found. Shikamaru doesn't want to be Hokage, are you kidding me?

"The sanctions against Boruto were in accordance with regulations." "It's also the will of the Hidden Leaf's citizens." "No matter what I order, it won't convince them."

These are not comments that come from someone dead set on hunting down and punishing a criminal that murdered a political leader. This is the kind of thing you say when you're like, "listen, yes, but also bureaucracy is a bitch and I've gotta keep up appearances or someone else will actually hunt Boruto down and kill him".

He's less worried about the fact Sarada is trying to protect Boruto and more worried about how she's doing it. In my opinion. This is not a fact, I just wanted to point it out, lol.

Again, Shikadai hears Naruto's daughter, and who is currently perceived as being Kawaki's sister, say she wants to protect Boruto who supposedly killed her dad. She also said she feels like he's alive somewhere, and I'm willing to bet dollars to donuts that is something a lot of other folks, including Shikamaru, feel as well.

Shikamaru's reaction to when Boruto arrives pretty much solidified my belief that he knows something is up and he doesn't think Boruto killed Naruto, or at the very least that Naruto could still be alive and there's more going on with this whole situation, so he's not eager to jump the gun and kill a child. Which is more than I can say for some of our pol- nevermind ignore this

Shikamaru's reaction to hearing Code is there and attacking people: Orders an evacuation and tries to figure out why Code is attacking, immediately concerned about the safety of the villagers.

Shikamaru's reaction to hearing Boruto just showed up: Prioritize Code and the claw marks, but keep tabs on Boruto without suggesting any kind of attack or restraint or anything like that. He's not worried about Boruto. But he is wanting to gather more intel on the situation as a whole, which makes sense, all things considered.

Chapter 82

Key Notes:

Very intentional frame of Shikadai seeing Kawaki show up, Kawaki shouting for Himawari and Inojin to move out of the way so he can attack a claw thing, not worrying about their safety at all.

Himawari calls him "Big Bro" and Kawaki tells her not to call him that. Not very big brotherly. Again, Shikadai is there for this. Along with everyone else, so. You know, things are kind of weird. These are weird dynamics that are not matching up with their false memories.

Chapter 83

Key Points:

Shikamaru, again, wants Kawaki to focus on eliminating Code - who is an actual threat - and pretty much ignores Boruto because he's not a concern.

Focuses on getting rid of the claw things even after Code has run off, prioritizing keeping him away and protecting the villagers instead of "trying to bring a Hokage killer to justice" or whatever the fuck people are trying to do with Boruto.

Chapter 84

Key Notes:

What Shikamaru took away from Kawaki's breakdown of the situation was that Boruto only came to the village to deal with Code. Meaning that Boruto was never a threat to the village, and there's no reason to worry about him, but it also probably indicates that there is something worth doing more digging into to figure out what the fuck is going on with all of the discrepancies in his memory that I'm sure are pissing him off.

"It better not be someone in the sensory unit."

Kawaki doesn't trust Shikamaru, and probably not anyone else in Konoha. That's not a very "Naruto's son" kind of attitude to have. The fact Shikamaru doesn't seem phased by that distrust means he's either been dealing with it for three years already, has been suspicious of Kawaki this whole time, and more likely both of those things.

Also, what the fuck, that sounds threatening? Ino would kick Kawaki's ass. I'd love to see him try though, lol. No I wouldn't, don't do that please.

Weird tensions between Kawaki (supposedly Naruto's son) and Sarada (Sasuke's daughter). If it were a rivalry, that'd make sense. But the hostility between them? Nah, that don't track.

Sarada basically confirming that Boruto was after Code and most likely trying to find a way to save the people who have been turned into trees. A very "Naruto's son" kind of attitude.

Chapter 85

Key Notes:

BOY. IF AMADO KNOWS, SHIKAMARU HAS KNOWN THE WHOLE GOD DAMN TIME

His face is hidden and he's not surprised or saying anything because if he's been trying to figure this shit out without tipping anyone off WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU SAY

Especially if he doesn't want Eida to know that he knows, because jesus christ her powers are scary and he's probably not eager to have to add that into the mess of variables he's already tangling with.

In Summary

Main Points

Shikamaru has been suspicious of this shit since omnipotence went off and fucked with people's heads.

Shikadai has been privy to some strangeness around Himawari, Kawaki and Boruto at the same time, and I can't imagine that he hasn't asked his dad about it or something. So whatever Shikadai has seen, I assume Shikamaru is somewhat aware of or we'll see a scene where something Shikadai saw or something he says makes it all click into place when his dad hears about it.

Shikamaru's language and attitude around Boruto have been intentionally vague and avoidant. It's the "will of the village", following the system's rules, etc. etc.

Shikamaru's more concerned with Code as a threat than with tracking down Boruto, which conveniently gives him an excuse to not pursue Boruto and prioritize the safety of the village at the same time.

Amado knows? Then Shikamaru has known. No doubt. There was a whole ass chapter where Shikamaru outsmarted Amado. Narratively speaking, we've got a point of reference for why there's a parallel here with Amado talking about this out loud and getting to see Shikamaru's reaction - or in this case, lack thereof - to hearing it.

Conclusion

Shikamaru continues to be the coolest man alive. Thank you for coming to my TED talk, byyyeeee

[sweaterkittensahoy]

I saw someone the other day--as they were claiming my concern for crochet in fast fashion was too niche to be geniune concern about fast fashion in general (yes, really)--who said she boycotts Starbucks because of their union busting.

And, like, seeing that and the claim against me side by side was sort of a revelation. Like, you think I'm not sincere in my concerns over fast fashion because I'm not yelling about all fast fashion all the time and am, instead, speaking as an expert in the one place in fast fashion (crochet) that I know I can fully understand and explain.

And you're doing an ongoing boycott even though the union has not asked for one. The Starbucks union (twitter here) has called for boycotts at certain times. Like red cup day. They are using boycotts strategically to send a message to management. They are NOT asking for a perpetual boycott, and carrying a perpetual boycott and bringing it up in a completely different conversation just tastes like you want to be patted on the back for being the best at solidarity.

But you're not. You are actively going against what the union wants.

Anyway, there's something here about moral purity and thinking you have to "win" at being the most politically active and engaged that is fucking exhausting and stupid and tied directly into the idea that the left has a massive issue with thinking incremental change is somehow bad and wrong.

Like, I don't know. I have finite energy, and my art form is constantly devalued and treated like a joke by people who don't even know how to do it, so maybe that's why I've got a stick up my ass on it being further devalued by companies who are lying about how its made to make whatever profit you get from a 14 dollar vest that took someone several hours on a knitting machine, and maybe you have the energy to get mad at all fast fashion all the time, but we're both on the side of skilled workers deserve to get paid, except you refuse to buy coffee from some of them for the morality points you gave yourself.

So.

[the-kcm-muggleborn]

Kind For You

Fandom: Hogwarts Legacy

O/C: Sebastian Sallow x Edwart Thompson x Ominis Gaunt ✨️platonic✨️ (My OC)

Warnings: None:}

Word count: 1k>

Chapter 4

Part 1

Weeks went by. November was at its end.

Edwart was studying hard, trying to keep up with everything that had happened the past 4 months, his head was a mess, and all that ancient magic was exhausting. He wished there was simply a book he could educate himself on. Edwart was disappointed and tired because there was still so much the Keepers were not telling him. And to add to it Ranrok and Rookwood were starting to get too close to finding the truth about this powerful magic. 

Edwart was sitting in the library working on his astronomy assignment when Sebastian came in looking for him.

“You're here. Brilliant.” He sat next to Edwart who just signed deeply.

“What is it that you need, Sebastian?” He spoke sharply.

“Uu someone’s in a sour mood. Relax. I just wanted to talk.” Sebastian raised his hands in a surrendering gesture. 

Edwart left his assignment and rubbed his hands across his face. He leaned in his chair and groaned. “I apologise. I've just been having trouble sleeping.”

“Again?” Sebastian spoke with concern in his voice. “Maybe it's time you got to Nurse Blainey?”

“No. No, I'm fine, it's just something that's been… Never mind that.” Edwart shook his head. “What did you want to talk about? I could use a distraction.” Edwart smiled slightly.

“I spoke with Ominis. I told him none of us will be able to avoid Dark Magic forever. So the more we know about Salazar Slytherin and the Dark Arts. the better prepared we'll be.” 

Edwart sighed slightly. Not the distracting topic he certainly hoped for. Sebastian continued. “Unfortunately. only a Gaunt knows the location of the scriptorium's entrance and Ominis won't tell me. I’m simply out of ideas.”

Edwart wasn't sure if helping Sebastian with this one was a good idea. But he deeply trusted both Sebastian and Ominis. So he decided they'd be safer together than apart. “Do you want me to try and talk to him?”

“You? I suppose it's worth a try. but don't get your hopes up. Ominis is annoyingly stubborn. Nothing new.”

“Okay then. Lead me to him.” Edwart packed his things and both boys headed to the dungeons. 

“Keep an eye out. Never know who's watching, although that hasn't stopped us before.” Sebastian said jokingly.

“Strictly speaking. it has. We were caught.” Edwart spoke back, matching his friend’s tone.

“Ugh. Don't remind me. Damned poltergeist - such a nuisance” Sebastian rolled his eyes as they kept walking.

Both boys finally reached the dungeons when they noticed Ominis leaning against a wall.

“Oh. There’s Ominis. Go. And good luck.”

Sebastian took a turn and awaited a few feet away. Edwart took a deep breath and walked over to Ominis who looked rather lost in thoughts.

“Hello, Ominis. How do you do?” Edwart decided to go about this friendly but firmly to not waste time.

“I'm… Alright. ” Ominis smiled lightly. “It's just Sebastian's been pestering me lately about something and I'm frustrated with him.”

“Can I be honest?” Edwart decided to get straight to the point but he did not want to lose his politeness.

“I suppose?” Ominis seemed suspicious.

“Sebastian told me about the scriptorium trouble. We were talking about Hogwarts founders, and he mentioned it. Wouldn't say much more, though.”

“I understand. Well, he seems to think it contains the answer to saving Anne. I think it's likely full of Dark Magic that is better left untouched.”

“You've never been inside?” Edwart asked with interest.

“Of course not! I only know about it because of my favourite aunt- Noctua. She thought like I do. Didn't agree with the family on the use of Dark Magic. She wrote regularly to my father about her efforts to gain access, and then she simply vanished.”

“Sebastian told me a little of what happened when you were young. What your family made you do. I'm sorry, Ominis.” Edwart treaded carefully. 

“Should’ve known he would have told you.” Ominis signed. “I think neither of us had the most idyllic childhood.”

“True. That’s why I think we could be stronger if we went together than let Sebastian go alone and possibly get himself killed.”

“Maybe you're right…” Ominis said hesitantly.

“That is a bit unnerving.” Edwart crossed his arms. “I understand your hesitation. I suppose even if it might lead to answers about what happened to your aunt. it does pose a risk.”

“Aunt Noctua went down this path with good intentions and lost her life. I don't want the same to happen again. To neither of you.” Ominis shook his head and started slightly pacing again.

“You don't know that history will repeat itself. Besides, you said your aunt thought like you. This could honour her memory and get you answers about Slytherin and Sebastian answers for Anne. Your aunt pursued this alone.” Edwart stopped Ominsi's pacing by putting both hands on his shoulders to grab his attention “We will do it together. I'll promise you. I am taking responsibility.”

Ominis swallowed thickly. As he was finally convinced. “Hmm. I see what you've done here. And, I confess, you've convinced me. I didn't think it was possible…”

Edwart backed away and thanked Ominis. “Let's go fetch Sebastian.”

“Edwart-” Ominis stopped him. “Do you..? Know what you're doing?”

“Can't say that I do.” Edwart chuckled “But there's safety in numbers. Trust me, Ominis.”

As the trio was finally together. Ominis led both boys to the alleged entry of the scriptorium. 

“I hope I… we don't regret this,” Ominis said under his breath as he stood to the side. “These braziers grant access to the scriptorium.”

“Now, you'll share? You wouldn't tell me when I practically begged.” Sebastian pouted a bit.

“It wasn't you who told me what I needed to hear,” Ominis said as calmly as ever. “Opening the entrance has something to do with threes.”

Edwart looked around, he noticed 3 symbols on a stone wall in front of him.

“Well- three heads are better than one.” Sebastian joked.

“It's two heads are better than one.” Ominis furrowed his eyebrows.

“And by that logic, three is better than two. Simple mathematics Ominis.” Sebastian smiled. 

“I see 3 symbols here” Edwart poked at a wall. “I think this is the stone door.”

“Well done, now to open it.” Sebastian said. “three braziers.”

“Someone’s been actually listening.” Ominis chuckled. 

“I do that…” Sebastian agreed. “Occasionally.”

Edwart cast 3 fast confringos. which opened the door. 

“Something's happening,” Sebastian said almost excitedly.

“I hope we're ready for this.” Ominis on the other hand looked as anxious as Edwart never saw. 

Part 2>

-------------- Autor's notes:--------------

Thank you so much for reading Part 1 of the new 4th Chapter! I know it's been long-awaited! I'm still working on it but it's certainly looking good. Many more missions to come and a third trial! I'll be skimping on those and some of the side quests that do not have cutscenes. Hope you enjoyed it

[catsnuggler]

me complaining in the tags about the struggles of being an anarchist and a Norse neopagan are not at all to imply I think I've got the short end of the stick in life.

potentially being misperceived as a Nazi is a problem, it sucks.

it also isn't as bad as being a Jew, a person of color, a socialist, disabled, and/or a queer person, etc, and seeing someone who appears to be (and is) an able-bodied white man, standing at 6'1", wearing a symbol on his neck that might indicate he's a racist, but maybe not, and you don't know, but you know he's just going about his business and, sure, he keeps to himself, he isn't hurting anyone or harassing anyone, but maybe he just doesn't think he could get away with it right now? and nobody has said anything to this guy, nobody has questioned what that thing on his neck is, what it means, if it means what they fear it means, what you think it means - and you aren't going to be the one to ask him. he's not the tallest guy, but he's tall enough. he's not the strongest guy, but he's strong enough. he also looks depressed, and like maybe all isn't right with him... should you really bark up his tree, or just finish your business and go off to your own corner, and just hope that maybe that thing on his neck doesn't mean he's a Nazi? well, he is - I am - not a Nazi, but how is the average person, who either doesn't recognize it at all, or vaguely knows it's associated with some pagans, or vaguely knows it's associated with some Nazis - how is that average person supposed to know that?

yet wearing the hammer is also, I feel, an act of resistance in an area that is so full of conservative Christians. to indicate that just because I'm another white in this area, doesn't mean that I'm a Christian, and that possibly that also means I don't share their politics - and, in point of fact, I don't share their politics at all - is an affirmation of my individuality and humanity, and I hope that pushing against the Christian conservative cultural bubble of my area, in my own way, makes it a little easier for people of other religions, and other deviations from the Christian conservative norm, to push against that bubble in their own ways.

but then, I have encountered my coreligionists here before... some are cool people, others are what I utterly detest and loathe, and what I fear I'll be perceived as.

problems, struggles, not the worst in the world by any stretch of the imagination, I don't think that for a moment, but that doesn't mean they don't suck.

[blowflyfag]

ECW Magazine: February 2000

16 QUESTIONS WITH YOSHIHIRO TAJIRI

BY GABE SAPOLSKY ‘JAPANESE BUZZSAW’ KICKS HIS WAY THROUGH ECW ROSTER

Since joining Extreme Championship Wrestling in the beginning of 1999, Yoshihiro Tajiri has proven to be a perfect fit for the federation. From his bloody, barbed-wire beating at the hands of Taz at Heat Wave on July 18 to his victory over Little Guido and Super Crazy during a three-way dance at Anarchy Rulz on Sept. 19, Tajiri solidified the brutal reputation he built as a wrestler in Japan.

Tajiri is currently a soldier in Steve Corino’s war against hardcore wrestling. The following is an interview with the “Japanese Buzzsaw” conducted through an interpreter.

Q1. DO YOU LIKE WRESTLING IN THE UNITED STATES?

A. I like it except for the people. They are really ignorant and disrespectful. This has become a home to me, though. In Japan, I was also considered a rebel, I never really fit in. I am much more comfortable here. I get paid the most money here. I’d say that’s my favorite thing about the United States.

Q2. HAVE YOU PICKED UP A LOT OF ENGLISH?

A. I’m learning very quickly. I know a lot of phrases, for instance (now speaking in English): “ECW fans are white trash” (now back to Japanese through the interpreter). I’m very intelligent so my English improves every day. I learned Spanish while I was in Mexico. Soon I’ll be fluent in three languages. 

Q3. HOW DOES MEXICO COMPARE TO THE UNITED STATES?

A. Im supposed to answer that in one paragraph? They are very different. I can live in Mexico, Japan or the United States with equal ease. 

Q4. HOW DO THE DIFFERENT PROMOTIONS YOU’VE WORKED FOR COMPARE?

A. ECW has been my favorite promotion. I’m on national television every week here, I get the biggest checks of my career. I’m in a video game and everywhere I go I can find someone to kiss my ass because they know how good I am.

Q5. HAVE YOU HAD DIFFICULTY GETTING AROUND IN THE UNITED STATES?

A. Not really. A guy named Doug Gentry has actually helped me a lot. I call him and he drives me wherever I want. If I need something done around the apartment, he comes running. If I ask for a favor, he does it. He’s such a mark. It makes me laugh. It’s like I have my own butler. 

Q6. WHY DON’T YOU HAVE RESPECT FOR THE ECW FANS?

A. Like I said earlier, most of them are ignorant white trash. They chant items off a Chinese food Menu at me. They are just too stupid to even know that I am Japanese. Most of them couldn’t tell the difference between a Japanese, Chinese and Korean guy if they were all standing next to each other with their country’s flags hanging over their heads. That is pure ignorance. 

Q7. HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN YOUR CHANGE IN APPEARANCE AND ATTITUDE SINCE YOU ENTERED ECW?

A. This is the real me. I acted polite and quiet when I first got here because I was trying to earn a job. Now that I have cemented my place in ECW as a star, I can do and act however I want. You can say I put on an act and that I worked the ECW fans. Their stupid minds stereotype me as a nice, little foreigner. Well, that’s not me. I’m the Japanese buzzsaw and I’m the most dangerous athlete in ECW. I’m after the big money and I’ll do anything to get it.

Q8. THAT INCLUDES ALIGNING WITH STEVE CORINO?

A. He pays me the best. I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to make as much money as I can. There were two things that attracted me to wrestling. I wanted to travel and I wanted to make money. So far in ECW I’ve been very successful at both. 

Q9. HOW DID YOU COME UP WITH THE IDEA FOR THE TARANTULA?

A. That has to be one of the stupidest questions I've ever been asked. I'm proficient in Japanese, American and Mexican wrestling styles and kick boxing. I know every pressure point and every way possible to twist and turn your body. I know more wrestling holds than most wrestlers, for instance Tommy Dreamer, will ever forget.  The Tarantula is just what happens when I apply my immense knowledge to the ring.

Q10. WHICH WRESTLING STYLE DO YOU PREFER

A. It really doesn’t matter to me. I’m a machine. I just win and make money.

Q11. WHO HAS INFLUENCED YOUR CAREER?

A. Of course Kendo Nagasaki who trained me. I’d say from Mexico it would be Negro Casas. I have learned many things from him that I do today in ECW. As far as non-wrestlers, Victor Quinones, who booked me in ECW, has been very influential to me in and out of the ring. Victor has played a huge role in my success

Here are the names of some people you have been involved with in ECW. What are your opinions of them?

Q12. STEVIE CORINO

A. He is one of the most intelligent people I have met. Did I mention he pays me really well?

Q13. Jack Victory

A. A true legend in the business. It is an honor to be associated with him.

Q14. TOMMY DREAMER

A. I have shown respect for everyone mentioned, but I cannot do that for Tommy Dreamer. I hate everything that Dreamer stands for. I really take pleasure in hurting him and anything that is dear to him. That is why i sprayed Francine in the face [on July 31 at ECW arena in Philadelphia]. I will make him suffer and I will break his back and put him out for good.

Q15. SUPER CRAZY

A. Crazy and I were once very good friends. The rivalry we had in ECW has destroyed that friendship. I think he’s just getting jealous because I’m winning more of the matches. He is definitely one of the best lucha libre wrestlers in the world and a great athlete, but I’m better.

Q16. JERRY LYNN

A. I’ve been in the ring with the best of Japan, like Jushin Liger, the top wrestlers of two Mexican promotions and many of the top stars in America. Jerry Lynn is one of the best technical wrestlers I have ever faced. He is flawless, except for one thing: He is weak. He is always injured and that always gives me a body part to kick the hell out of. If i know Lynn has injured ribs, you better believe I’m going to kick and chop those ribs until he cannot breathe. That is why he will never beat me.

[absenthiium]

good things that happened yesterday at the radical pride parade: a list

-being there at all, for starters, was incredible. queer issues often tend to be ignored, in italy, and bigger pride parades have a very vertical organization, are mostly devoid of any political content, and intertwined with politicians and corporations that never gave a fuck about us. the group i'm in, that has organized this alternative, oppositional parade, has been meeting for about two months which is nothing. and yet, there was about 5000 people protesting with us.

-we felt so proud. of being there, of having done it, of knowing it's the beginning of something. someone told us we're making history, here, and we are. i saw history in my comrades' eyes, in their bared smiles, and i know, i know, what we're building will grow higher than the sun.

-while distributing pronouns badges, i ran into a quartet of old dykes, who asked me to write "lesbian" in various languages onto their tags. upon inquiring on my pronouns, one said "ah, masculine and feminine. just like me in the old days".

-a friend, I, insists he's going through the faggot version of menopause. as in, they say, he can no longer be a twink, because he's 30 and needs a job.

-i wrote and performed a speech against the presence of cops in queer spaces. i felt powerful, for someone so anxious; like rage was eating me from the inside out, like fire could spring from my mouth as i screamed into the microphone.

-about pronouns badges: my friend Lu and i tried to give a few to some cops. they refused, of course, as they can't wear them on their uniform. who knows, maybe that's way they don't have collar numbers here.

-in my defense, i brought a rum flask solely because Lu asked, and because it was exilarating the last time i did. but as we took a sip each, all we could do was agree that it was a fucking awful idea.

-at some point, those in charge of the music put on smalltown boy by bronski beat. my friend cal and i hugged each other tight, as we almost wept on the other's shoulder.

-i danced, so much. i don't think i've ever felt less ashamed.

-fuck, i love, and i love, and i love; what we've done and what it's been and what will been and all i've met and seen and touched. i love you, and we're strong, and we're going to be alright.

[whatever-you-can-give-me]

Genuine question: why does disagreeing (without being all ‘u r wrong’, but simply just saying ‘cool! Here is my take on this’) with how others see a character get you immediately labled a ‘transphobe’? Or just labled as anything really. Like. Fandom space is for having fun, fandom space is a place of many different & wonderful headcanons & new ways of seeing things! Yet ‘headcanon’ is still not ‘canon’, and can be disagreed with. Hell, you can very well disagree with some of the stuff canon does! It doesn’t make it less canon of course, it just makes your experience with it more palatable to you.

So when a person says ‘here is my blorbo! I imagine him as trans and like viewing related content!’ and you say ‘awesome take, i bet there are a lot of interesting things you can do with this if you explore this more! I personally like thinking of this character & looking at content of him as biologically male, as described in canon!’ shouldn’t the answer be ‘wow! Two cakes! So cool!’ instead of ‘u r just a bigoted transphobe, the only right way to see him is as [insert specific gender identity] or literally as anything BUT what u see him as, because canon mentioned these select things that pertain to said character taking on masculine and feminine traits specifically from a narrative standpoint’ ??

I’m seriously just so lost. Just because someone doesn’t like seeing a certain character a certain way, (without disrespecting other interpretations,) it suddenly catapults them into being an awful person??? huh??

Of course it also works the other way, and with many other things, which is just as weird, which is exactly the point of my question here.. bros, the world... 💔 (m so sorry this is so long ong. i tend to ramble. pls don't answer if u don't have the time, have a good one <3)

oh man this is. first of all i'm not sure if this is in reference to some specific post or tag or if it's just because i've been very opinionated recently. but i do love to talk, so you're in luck.

also i'm not. sure if this is bait? i'm going to answer under the assumption that it isn't because it's. honestly a pretty good summary of a very real issue not with fandom exclusively but more so the internet as a whole. if anyone else has gotten this exact ask copy-pasted in their askbox let me know in the replies. (sorry if this is 100% genuine op, there's just a Lot Of Bait on this topic going around at all times forever and it's. june. so.)

objective disclaimer: don't. insult or accuse people of things. because of the art they make?? especially not fanwork for free for fun??? have you seen the state of the world right now? Now Is Not The Time To Be Arguing About Trans Headcanons. i'm answering this because i have a lot of thoughts on the nature of fandom, not because i think knee-jerk anger at anyone is helpful right now. if you're big mad, write to your senators or donate to the trevor project.

anyway.

basically: it's twitter's fault. [not just twitter, but twitter is The example of this] the algorithms of most websites, especially social media websites, prioritize arguments and things that are generally clickbaity because if you're spending a lot of time arguing, you have your eyeballs pointed at the site for longer and therefore you see more ads and therefore the advertisers and therefore the app makes more money. therefore the kinds of "you're disagreeing me therefore you must be bigoted against my opinions" kind of kneejerk discourse gets a lot of clicks and very mainstreamed. this is an issue the entire internet has, and also politics. it's twitter's fault. i hate it here.

in the specific circumstance you're describing. it's a few things, a lot of it being. gestures at the current state of the world. there's a lot of genuine anger towards genuine injustice boiling inside of a lot of people, and it's getting thrown at the nearest target because systematic change is difficult and slow, and sometimes it feels good to give someone a hard time for a tiny microcosm of something you're angry about because you can't wrestle god or throw a brick at a politician.

a lot of us in fandom are queer and scared. it doesn't justify hurting other queer people over different interpretations of a media property, but that is often why it happens. can't stop current events? yell at someone you feel is putting art in the world that Isn't Queer Enough (don't fucking do that, yall. there is room in the world for a lot of art. and just because it's not Visibly Queer or Queer In The Way You Are doesn't make it less valid as art. certainly don't accuse people of bigotries about it.) or that they feel like their space is being encroached upon by an outsider (no one has to tell you their list of marginalized identities to have their art allowed past the threshold of Queer Enough! don't fucking do that either, yall! you sound like cops!)

there's also the fact that people tend to put themselves in their art and interpretations. so seeing "i don't view this character this way" can feel like "i don't think You are valid". it's important to recognize when you're taking something Personally when it Isn't Personal. you're allowed to have your Big Feelings about particular art or interpretations. god knows i do! but the artist probably has Big Feelings about their art too, and while you may not understand them, that should be respected.

and this "seeing yourself (or not seeing yourself and it hurts) in art" goes both ways. a lot of the same body types often gets headcanoned as trans, because it's a very easy in for Baby's First Trans Headcanon, and as far as human sexual dimorphism goes, there are some patterns. but, say, what if a skinny, short, baby-faced cis man wants to see art of babyfaced cis men, without feeling within the queer community the kind of scrutiny he experiences outside of it, the assumption that his masculinity must be different, that obviously someone who looks like that is a trans man. what if a six foot tall cis woman sees the way that big, tall women in media are so often headcanoned as trans, more often than shorter, thinner women, and feels othered by it? wanting to represent themselves in art does not become somehow less valid because of their gender identities. that's ludicrous.

but people are angry and scared, and people put themselves in their art, and people get angry when they feel like their space is being encroached on, and they lash out. it's not fair, and i hate how common it's become, but i see how it happened.

honestly, i've thought about this specific issue a lot, so thank you for possibly-baiting me, anon. this is such a. it's such a bubble issue, but it's a microcosm of a very widespread problem of outrage merchants and Doing Things Correctly and What Is Allowed To Be Queer.

it's all allowed. all of it. even the stuff you hate. even the stuff that's Too CisHet. there are so many bigger problems than fanwork right now.