#if so no wonder he wants to retire
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@perpetualcynicism has my brain thinking : jing yuan angst? jing yuan angst. either way, check out some of their brainrots in the notes. they're glorious.
sometimes i do dare to wonder. how long would it take for jing yuan to fall in love? the xianzhou have lived long lives. time doesn't quite flow as it does for us. would it take him months? years? centuries?
damn.
#&&. notice board !!#it's their idea of jing yuan's unchanging view of you that broke me#and yet at the same time it makes so much sense#he's seen drastic change yes#but the luofu in itself is a very stagnant piece of the universe#finding change ; immediate change must be so hard when you live long lives surrounded by so many people who live long lives#and to suddenly have these spots of short lived species amongst you#it must be jarring to some#it reminds me of that one apprentice to a short life species artisian#he never really had the chance to show any change or improvement before his master died due to his own procrastination#and it must have been jarring#losing track of decades so easily#god and jing yuan himself had yingxing for a friend#how would the rest of the quintet taken his natural death?#would dan feng have pulled the same move he would have for baiheng?#HMMMMMMMM#and this also begs the question#for immortals like zhongli#who lived six thousand years thus far#what is the passage of like for him?#he's lived amongst mortals. he's seen change so so much change#do those six thousand years truly feel like eternity for him?#if so no wonder he wants to retire#to count the passage of time with the lives of mortals ( like sand in an hourglass )#like damn#immortal characters are delicious#i want to pick them apart.
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it's so interesting talking to and around my father, because personality-wise we are extremely similar (so much so that sometimes I'll say things, then my mother will go quiet and respond...you know, you sounded just like your father) but I grew up as a woman, and he grew up as a man, and that does that make an appreciable difference.
#he's in a vicious fight with the neighborhood HOA (seriously it's a saga) but if he did some soft power outreach#downplayed his viciousness; groveled a little and complimented their hard work; played the long game?#he'd OWN them.#but he doesn't want to do that and his life has never actually forced him to learn those skills.#meanwhile I'm sitting there wondering why he hasn't just...complimented karen.#told her he SOOOOOO appreciates how hard she works. he's so grateful she's showing him how the neighborhood is run.#oh and I do have questions and also if you're taking suggestions...?#like sorry but ''I walked into a room and people immediately recognized I was in charge'' is not a good longterm strategy.#''I know the most about this issue and am correct!!!'' again. not going to work.#how have you gotten to RETIREMENT AGE and this has never been soul-crushingly embarrassingly beaten into your head?#this is hs nonsense.#anyway. thanksgiving....happened.#celestial emporium of benevolent knowledge
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📸 by Martin Trenkler
#max verstappen#autumn posts#AHHH THE NEWS!! I am so happy for him!!!! 🥹❤️✨#over the moon for them both ahhh#sending them all the best wishes!!!#and omg his comment about already being a bonus dad 😭❤️ MY HEART#he's so wonderful 🥺💞✨#also Martin is a real one for this hashtag 😳 hehe!#that glow ✨🌅✨#ahhh#I usually don't blog about drivers' off track / non sports lives as much since it's not my jam#but with all his talk of wanting to be a dad!! and how hard it seemingly has been? just awww my heart#our boy is speedrunning life 🏎️✨#sad talk potentially ahead but ............#if he does retire sooner than later I get it!! I'll be bummed but excited to follow his career wherever#just like Daniel like bro say the word and I'll get into supercars 🫡❤️#very Fellowship of the Ring 'you have my sword' type beat#anyways!! I gotta run to work!!#sadly office life is keeping me off the insta search 😭#this weekend I'll have a little time!! one family thing and gasp .... a date!!!!!#I met a gal last weekend a local gay bar and now we're getting brunch 😳❤️ we shall see!!#my heart is open and go with the flow#especially since Merc in retrograde has me 😵💫 hehe#anyways!! I gotta run!!#sending everyone the most excellent of energy and happy Friday vibes!! 💖✨✨#hope its a great time of day!! 🌇🏙️🌃❤️
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Please don't crucified me if this headcanon is deemed unrealistic in real life. (´;ω;`) More notes / detailed notes:
stayed & travelled with the Figs for awhile -- after being found, before finally dropped of to an institution, as the Figs think their travelling life style is not really suitable to raise a child
quickly picked up civilization as he is an intelligent child (that's why he is a ravenclaw)
exchanged letters with the travelling Figs during his time at the institution / orphanage
was a really helpful child during his time at the institution / orphanage that he is close with the staff
he thinks of befriending people is a way of learning & by helping them he gets to experience a lot of different things
a mellow temperament child in general (just like how it is ingame)
likes exploring (bcs damn! we really going places in that game)
picked the silly 'Alex Xander' name himself, maybe he heard a mother called her child with that name once and he is obsessed with that name ever since.
he always writes Xander as his 'family name' to show that he is complete even without a family
actually a bit older than his classmates, as he went through extra few years to catch up to civilization as a feral child
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#anyhow i really love our barn owl; she's so beautiful but with a face like biscuit
#i can't stop thinking of how he is a child raised by the forest; so ... ; like; that's why he got clawed scars on his face and all .......#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy mc#character sheet#student id#hogwarts legacy fanart#fanart#i was torn between the thought of fig adopted him for several years already; exactly after he retired from travelling#or they never had any contact with him after they dropped him off#and literally only met again when his magic awakened & noticed by hogwarts; and Fig be like; Aren't u that child?#and during their time together Fig is considering to officially adopt him as their child#it makes the end game so much sadder ; ~~ ;#like; they were just going to be family for real; and suddenly AUGH; and then what's gonna happen to him; that's another story#anyhow what's gonna happened with seb; i don't think he has any other guardians in the family; tho @nne can just whoosh! without guardian;#is legal matter doesn't matter in this world; ok ; no more headache; just independency & fantasy#fsh; knowing how his family is financially stable; 0minis would want to just adopt; but he would hate adopting @nne & seb to his family#pondering i wonder if any other prof would like to take custody over my child#or probably Figs have kind relatives that would take him in#aieehhh let's not think too hard for that part now#i am not a novelist for a reason#plot holes; plot holes everywhere#fshsfh anyhow i don't know wand flexibility is a thing#i was confused what to pick and just went with what they chose for me first#is that information even important or has any meaning at all
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i swear my stepdad is so illogical AND stubborn it hurts
#okay so strap in coz this is a wild ride#tl;dr we have been without heat and warm water for years and i mean literal years#because he refuses to pay off some debt he built up with the company#because he feels unfairly treated (let's not get into this. it absolutely makes no sense) by the company#so instead of doing the logical step of growing some balls and admitting he made a mistake and paying off his shit#he's been looking for a new supplier all over but the deal IS#that he's been doing this with a couple of places before and people are hesitant to even make him any offers#and you'd think that learning about THAT at least now he'd be like. idk willing to just pay off his debt and be done with it#but you'd be WRONG#now he's looking to just have our entire heating system replaced for the teeny tiny price of 25000 bucks#mind you his debt isn't even a THIRD of that#and obviously he can't afford those 25000 bucks#so what's his next step now you might wonder?#well good thing you asked. his next step is going off on ME for not paying towards the new heating he wants#and now that that's not working for him guess what he did next?#that's right. he bought shit expensive 'space heaters' that are pretty much just small little boxes that you plug into an outlet#and he swears up and down that they're going to heat up our house (it's negative degrees outside)#(it's obviously not working)#and genuinely. all i can think of is how much money he shoved into trying to macgyver this house into a house with warm water and heating#and how he blew off ten thousands of bucks he got paid when he retired within the span of two weeks#when this debt could have been paid off ten times over by now#so now you might be thinking. okay tiago. why don't you move out#good question you see. my mom is disabled and reliant on someone who cares for her#something that he can't won't and shouldn't do because the last time he sorta kinda tried she almost died and we had to call an ambulance#she wouldn't eat a thing if i weren't there to cook. the house would fall into disrepair if i wouldn't do maintenance all around#i've set up (functioning) heat in some areas she occupies and i've gotten a boiler going so she at least has warm water#i'm paying off their bills to make sure he doesn't skip on paying any others. i'm buying groceries for them because again they wouldn't get#any for themselves#and finally. i've offered to pay off his debt so that we can finally live like normal fucking people do#and guess what. guess WHAT. he just got mad at me for not adding money to that 25000 bucks pool for that new fancy heating he wants
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It is always in the back of my mind that Olivia Octavius was the Doc Ock of Miles’ universe, like they were in the same universe the entire time!! That’s his Doc Ock!! Was she like a well known supervillain throughout his childhood? Did anyone have any clue to her identity (outside of the Parkers)?? Was it like a big deal to Miles to suddenly learn of this supervillain’s identity even if they hadn’t fought before because everyone in New York knows about Doc Ock??
Even if he had no personal connection to her, had never fought her before, had never met her civilian identity (I think), that’s still a big deal to suddenly find out what a supervillain looks like/is called outside of their costume, right??
#I wanna know more about Miles growing up with these villains that he (and everyone else in New York) relied on Peter to fight#and then suddenly adjusting to them being *his* villains#(as well as getting his own villains as his own superhero identity)#I want a mixture of him accepting the mantle and making it his own#I wonder if any villains retired when they saw that there was a new Spidey#like if they had that thought of ‘well if the new generation is picking up the hero work then maybe villainy should be passed off too’#or if any of them just didn’t wanna fight a new Spidey because they missed the old one too much#i wanna know so much more about Miles universe and all that so badly#Miles Morales#olivia octavius#doc ock#doctor octopus#Spiderman#spider man#spider-man
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📄⚾️🧢✨
#reblog#art#digital#original character#oc#persona#persona art#baseball persona#I had a huge phase back then when I wanted to play baseball so badly professionally but that didn’t went anywhere#hopefully now since I have time management I’ll get back to this wonderful sport#he’s now presently a office worker but has no memory of this old job (MYSTERY LETS GOOO)#He was retired and basically repurposed due to the controversy of AI vs humans in sports#however he was more specific a tool for amputee baseball players to use his parts and basically continue in playing the game#IM AM SPEAKING OF PERSONA LORE SINCE IT KINDA TIES TO AI WHEN IT CAN BE USED AS A TOOL NOT A EXPLOTIVE TJING (LOOKING AT SOME PEOPLE 👹)
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Man is saying weird things to me again
#help mom he's oversharing about drinking scotch every evening#that's very on brand for Man#tales from diana#i literally did Nothing to reach out to him i don't know what he wants#i was just thinking in the shower literally not even half an hour ago about how you know it's strange#he used to always have this way of talking to me like he was trying to impress me which is just kinda silly honestly#like i was a 20-21-year-old in awe of him and he was a retired male model eight years older than me w more life experience#and some rather exotic and interesting experiences at that#i think he somewhat envies that i seem (at least to him) like a self-possessed 'intellectual'#thats how he talks to me at least. it's funny tho#not that im not. like. smart. i think the both of us know i'm better-read than he'll be in 3 lifetimes#and i'm not quite self-possessed but i certainly don't have the open-wounded insecurity he does#while also being rather more confident than most ppl in some areas (and it's not ALL unearned)#he's got much more ambition than i do though. more ambition than i'll have in 10 lifetimes#and he seems to do everything with a motivation of external validation and approval.#so i think he has a chip on his shoulder. poor little Man#the two of us could not be more opposite. but i don't really strive to be like him in the ways he strives to be like me#he chases this dream of what he thinks the perfect man is and it's quite inhuman so of course he falls short.#i on the other hand am if anything much TOO accepting of my own faults and shortcomings. ahem#these are all things i will never say to Man. he's too silly to hear it#besides. im rather sure he likes me (? in some way) and i am these days just very ambivalent to him#i can't NOT say i find him attractive bc i do but he's just. sooooo not the one lol#he's a fascinating creature all flaws aside but i never find myself studying him at my own volition#Man just comes outta the woods sometimes to tell me about his travels or women or whiskey. he's odd#he's very eccentric but between the two of us i think i'm the better eccentric. no wonder he visits me sometimes#but he brings gifts and prayers like he's coming to a devotional shrine or something. i'm like sir this is not a temple#he'll never be normal but he is so strange in the ways i'm too good for. if i do say so myself#(and that's saying something bc i'm not too good for ANYTHING)
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i hope whichever psychiatrist i end up with will do what i say.
#like if its that guy who just finished his residency#this bitch is my age. and ive been taking pills since i was like 11. i have more experience than him essentially#and idk who im gonna get. im literally just gonna go off availability.#theres no way to tell anything otherwise#theres i think 3 in that office.#well technically 4 but i went to the 4th one for a bit when i was a teenager#and i dont remember what happened but i associate him with betrayal. so i guess he betrayed me?#wish i remembered how. i wonder if my mom remembers.#but i cant go to him it would be too weird.#also hes old and my problem is my old one retired. and i dont want to have that problem again any time soon.
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Started crying over the Batman Beyond Animated Movie concept art. I am so normal.
#do they want my left or right kidney? they can have that one and my appendix as I don't need those to survive#I'm saving my uterus for Silksong if it needs more funding. I'm not gonna use it so might as well.#/j#about selling my organs not about crying over Batman Beyond Animated Movie#I think a Batman Beyond Animated Movie could fix me. Or make me even more autistic about it. probably both.#Batman Beyond is what got me into Batman. it was the only Batman related thing my library had and I thought it looked cool#so I would just watch Batman Beyond for like 5 hours minimum every day during my surgery recovery#so if you're wondering why I am like this...that's why. Batman Beyond did it. it's still my comfort media and i always go back to it#THAT ONE IMAGE OF INQUE CHASING TERRY?? OH MY GOD IT'S SO GORGEOUS#oh my god I am so ordinary and neurotypical#THE FUCKING PRODUCTION DESIGN GUY ON SPIDERVERSE POSTED THEM??#sav eme Batman Beyond Animated Movie#it will fix me I promise#if it is made I will forgive Bruce Timm for his weird thing for Batman x Batgirl.#SPIDERVERSE OF BATMAN MOVIES?? OH MY GOD#Derek Powers on my movie screen#THE SHIT THEY COULD DO WITH SHRIEK??? HOLY FUCK#I hope to god they still have the cold open on old-man Batman (world-weary and brittle-boned) almost shooting somebody in a panic#because THAT is the only compelling reason I have ever seen for Bruce leaving behind the mantle#I love content where its like 'oh when he gets older he becomes the Alfred to a new Batman' or 'he'll retire because Gotham will be better'#but I'll be honest. I do not think Bruce is capable of retirement. I do not think he would ever hang up the mantle willingly#unless he almost became the very kind of person who got his parents killed: a gun-wielding coward. the pain in his eyes.#I could see that. Bruce realizing that he is incapable of being Batman. That he will do more harm for Gotham than good.#if they don't want it to be the opener that's fine. but I want that damn scene.#ajdfl;dksajfl;kjdsfl;kadjskl;fjds Terry my friend Terry on my movie screen#I am going to explode
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#😳#Who saw it coming?#Who is surprised?#Who is pissed?#Who is saying good for him?#Who else is wondering what major faux pas they did to have this move even pop up on the bingo card?#Has someone checked on Lew?#Has someone sent therapists to T#Has G been checked on?#I wanna know what his laat straw was#Is this even def confirmed?#Was it the team?#Was it the car?#Is T retiring and he wants to jump ship because he knows the direction things will turn without him?#Or just trying something different for what may be the last decade of his desire to race?#very interesting#I doubt it was money#Man has more than he knows what to do with lol#Also doubt it was a spur of the moment thing he has probably thought this over for months if not a year#So many theories#My sick ass can't even think straight#Is it a proven fact that we become mentally slower while sick?#Ive done and said some really slow shit the last near 2 weeks and I refuse to blame it on anything else but sickness#Like I really feel dumb#My agent asked me when to expect the edits we discussed and me with my whole chest said I guess you can expect them when you see my email 😮#My 16 year old forgot what a synonym was my ass said a spice 🤦🏽♀️#Wtf#send help#lewis hamilton
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something something about how the rings not just symbolised Yuuri and Victor's bond and was not just an omamori for them something something Victor was the first person Yuuri wanted to hold on to and share his dreams with and depend on after fighting for so long ALONE something something the rings symbolising this exact same thing something something about how Yuuri's arc still is wonderful even when he didn't win the gold because he finally learnt to actually depend on people, share his dreams and aims with them and not fight alone which is something he struggles with for the whole show
#yuri on ice ///#I am not sure about how to intrepret the whole of yuuri's arc but that's purely because I've watched the show only once#It always felt a bit off to me when the whole winning gold was a bit rushed in the last episode#And of course you could blame that on the pacing and you could say that there was flaws in the writing/the writers got confused#I've seen multiple posts about it and while I personally disagree I do think it is a valid interpretation#But I want to work with what DID happen in canon so I can be at peace with the episode lol#I choose to intrepret his arc as being one where he learns to not beat himself up over his failures (In lack of a better way to phrase it)#His anxiety plays a huge factor in it too though#One could argue that maybe winning gold would've given him that final push in believing that he is in fact extraordinary and not just#A dime a dozen skater (and I think that would have been wonderful too!)#And yeah they could have made him win gold AND have him not retire! But I don't think what we got in canon is inherently bad writing#(I mean excluding the scoring which from what I hear was inaccurate? But it doesn't bother me because Idk anything about scoring lmao)#Or maybe it's because this is a lesson I personally am struggling to learn and accept - that regardless of whether you win or not you#can and should strive to be better and better without losing hope#also a bit related to this but to me the emotional climax in the finale was actually Yuuri's free skate and him breaking the record#It was what further cemented my#thoughts about Yuuri's arc being about him and his need to be satisfied with his skating regardless of winning or losing#also fyi the takes I talked about aren't inherently ones I came across lol I just was thinking of various counter points#The whole reason I am writing this si because I want to understand this whole thing myself gdishsjshdh so writing it down seems like a good#thing#n rambles#Also hopefully this post doesn't show up in tags djsbdjbdjd
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Next week is high school computer deployment; Powers That Be obviously want all the high school librarians working because these are our students. We get paid extra since the days are outside of our contract.
I’ve been feeling guilty for only signing up for 3 out of the 4 days, but I’m mostly helping out the others since my kids don’t attend. (I ran the numbers and my school has something like 75 signed up versus 300 - 2,000 per other high schools.)
Anyway, the job station assignments came out in email and........
THREE ???? of the five of us are not listed anywhere ???
And the one other librarian is only listed for ONE DAY’S shift ???
What the heck is happening???
#we've known these dates since like February#one was wanting to retire so like I get it maybe he did so but WHERE are the other two?#I am very puzzled and a little put out bc like...#this deployment is our job#did everyone quit and get a different job or something#forever out of the loop#so this shall be interesting#no wonder they were begging for volunteers on two of the days they have only 2 people doing a 4 person station#work
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2024 Hungarian GP | x (edited)
#daniel ricciardo#autumn posts#the (edited) is quite unnecessary as it is most readily apparent lol but!!#I tried to rotate it 45 degrees ish and my lack of photo editing skills leaves much to be desired#anyways arm 😵💫❤️✨#I fear I'll be in a perpetual state of missing him#but I'll be savoring memories of him like light from a star still reaching earth years after its gone out 🌠#also that's overly dramatic hehe a new journey awaits!!! and I will be excited if he wants to share it with us!!!#until then I'll be blogging like its 2017 at times hehe#omg I was looking up top 2017 tracks and man there were some bangers that year 👏😎#okay nostalgia trip over I've been meaning to write but tbh I got myself all needlessly stressed!!#2025 is the year of not adding so much undue stress on myself - it's keeping me from flying!!!#also 2025 goals include drinking more water and less coffee 😒 sigh hehe#hope everyone has a very wonderful last day of the year!!!!#enjoying time with friends or fam or favorite hobbies ❤️#off to another chapter!! I hope good things are in store!!! 🎁🎉✨❤️#also if you read this far then hello and also my silliest yearning is Dan comes in to replace Liam in the summer#even tho RBR does Not deserve him and the stress of the sport with travel and media scrutiny are so much#retiring at 35? a dream!! but I do wonder what the vibe will be like after DTS drops#it feels like a proper goodbye had yet to come...idk#I'm still excited for Carlos and Max and Lewis and new faves too but#ahh I'm not saying anything that hasn't been said before#and he himself said he's done!!! so! c'est la vie#not goodbye but see ya later (in supercars or as a globetrotting dashing sponsor or just kickin it on the farm)#I'm at peace with all for the most part!!! but I'll be missing what could've been all the same#anyways I should go touch some grass! I'll be back soon!!#thank you everyone for all the kind tags my heart is like 💖💞💓💗💕!!!!#I appreciate this space and y'all so much ❤️❤️❤️ onto another year together!!#many more memories to make!!!
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it’s so funny how i rewatch s1 anthony scenes and i don’t give a shit about him (unless i really try to keep in mind what we know about him and try to understand what’s going on behind the facade/beyond what the show dictates we should see because it’s definitely not from his pov) and then i watch s2, particularly from ep 3 onwards, and suddenly it’s like, !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is my dumbass idiot
#ramble.txt#bridgerton#sorry i keep posting about this skfjgnfk#i might've moved fandoms but i'm not sure yet#this show really came at the perfect time#when there's nothing new from seb and people were mourning (?) the apparent state of AM atm#i mean. who cares?? seb made his choice and afaik it wasn't just because of the slow car that he decided to retire#anyway. i actually like anthony's s1 hair but not the sideburns#the sideburns and hair were especially atrocious in 1x08#before that it was passable#and i would love to know if they makeupped him to look tired almost all the time because he certainly doesn't look that way in s2#the van dusen dude mentioned that they broke anthony at the end of s1 so maybe that look was intentional#do i think about this/him too much? yes i do#it's such a delight to have new things#tangentially: i wonder if there are any fics out there of violet dying in childbirth (hyacinth survives) and suddenly anthony has 7 kids to#look after all on his own in addition to the title and the estate and omg#tangentially again: i really like how the show leaves it open to interpretation how much angst you want to assign to anthony#i just rewatched bits of 2x01 and the part where violet's like 'you will end up alone' and anthony stops and then he's like 'good day mother#yeah i just. you can interpret that in so many different ways from non-angsty ('omg whatever') to very angsty (maybe i deserve to be alone)#and i just think that's cool#uh ANYWAY#(i might gif that scene btw. MIGHT.)#anyway i'm out#//#actually i ... maybe i wanna gif his last scene in 1x08 too#hmmm#maybe that could be one gifset
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So today I want to talk about puberty blockers for transgender kids, because despite being cisgender, this is a subject I’m actually well-versed in. Specifically, I want to talk about how far backwards things have gone.
This story starts almost 20 years ago, and it’s kind of long, but I think it’s important to give you the full history. At the time, I was working as an administrative assistant for a pediatric endocrinologist in a red state. Not a deep deep red state like Alabama, we had a little bit of a purple trend, but still very much red. (I don’t want to say the state at the risk of doxxing myself.) And I took a phone call from a woman who said, “My son is transgender. Does your doctor do hormone therapy?”
I said, “Good question! Let me find out.”
I went into the back and found the doctor playing Solitaire on his computer and said, “Do you do hormone therapy for transgender kids?” It had literally never come up before. He had opened his practice there in the early 2000s. This was roughly 2006, and the first time someone asked. Without looking up from his game of Solitaire, the doctor said, “I’ve never done it before, but I know how it works, so sure.”
I got back on the phone and told the mom, who was overjoyed, and scheduled an appointment for her son. He was the first transgender child we treated with puberty blockers. But not, by far, the first child we treated with puberty blockers, period. Because puberty blockers are used very commonly for children with precocious puberty (early-onset puberty). I would say about twenty percent of the kids our doctor treated were for precocious puberty and were on puberty blockers. They have been well studied and are widely used, safe, and effective.
Well. It turned out, the doctor I worked for was the only doctor in the state who was willing to do this. And word spread pretty fast in the tight-knit community of ‘parents of transgender children in a red state’. We started seeing more kids. A better drug came out. We saw some kids who were at the age where they were past puberty, and prescribed them estrogen or testosterone. Our doctor became, I’m fairly sure, a small folk hero to this community.
Insurance coverage was a struggle. I remember copying articles and pages out of the Endocrine Society Manual to submit with prior authorization requests for the medications. Insurance coverage was a struggle for a lot of what we did, though. Growth hormone for kids with severe idiopathic short stature. Insulin pumps, which weren’t as common at the time, and then continuous glucose monitoring, when that came out. Insurance struggles were just part and parcel of the job.
I remember vividly when CVS Caremark, a pharmaceutical management company, changed their criteria and included gender dysphoria as a covered diagnosis for puberty blockers. I thought they had put the option on the questionnaire to trigger an automatic denial. But no - it triggered an approval. Medicaid started to cover it. I got so good at getting approvals with my by then tidy packet of articles and documentation that I actually had people in other states calling me to see what I was submitting (the pharmaceutical rep gave them my number because they wanted more people on their drug, which, shady, but sure. He did ask me if it was okay first).
And here’s the key point of this story:
At no point, during any of this, did it ever even occur to any of us that we might have to worry about whether or not what we were doing was legal.
It just never even came up. It was the medically recommended treatment so we did it. And seeing what’s happening in the UK and certain states in America is both terrifying and genuinely shocking to me, as someone who did this for almost fifteen years, without ever even wondering about the legality of it.
The doctor retired some years ago, at which point there were two other doctors in the state who were willing to prescribe the medications for transgender kids. I truly think that he would still be working if nobody else had been willing to take those kids on as patients. He was, by the way, a white cisgender heterosexual Boomer. I remember when he was introduced to the concept of ‘genderfluid’ because one of our patients on HRT wanted to go off. He said ‘that’s so interesting!’ and immediately went to Google to learn more about it.
I watched these kids transform. I saw them come into the office the first time, sometimes anxious and uncertain, sometimes sullen and angry. I saw them come in the subsequent times, once they were on hormone therapy, how they gradually became happy and confident in themselves. I saw the smiles on their faces when I gave them a gender marker letter for the DMV. I heard them cheer when I called to tell them I’d gotten HRT approved by insurance and we were calling in a prescription. It was honestly amazing and I will always consider the work I did in that red state with those kids to be something I am incredibly proud of. I was honored to be a part of it.
When I see all this transgender backlash, it’s horrifying, because it was well on the way to become standard and accepted treatment. Insurances started to cover it. Other doctors were learning to prescribe it. And now … it’s fucking illegal? Like what the actual fuck. We have gone so far backwards that it makes me want to cry. I don’t know how to stop this slide. But I wrote this so people would understand exactly how steep the slide is.
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