#if only he didnt care about people it would be so much easier

[crystallizsch]

thinking about jamil traveling alone for the first time but for some reason you’re still constantly on his mind

(i’ve been thinking about this and i just needed to get this out of my system and omg this was just supposed to be shorter but it ended up wayyy longer than intended)

(this is also an attempt at another x reader and it was proofread only by myself. some things might read awkward so go easy on me, i barely write 😔😔😔)

(kind of like a future au??? and can be read as romantic/(queer)platonic??)

Jamil had been planning this trip for months.

He had always wanted to travel to a new place by himself where he didn’t have to worry about anything or anyone else. Just himself and his own enjoyment.

Jamil planned on maximizing this whole trip. Reading everything about the place and making sure to see all the things that he would want to see while he was there.

However, you made sure to let him know that he should let himself loose and enjoy his trip naturally. It was supposed to be a fun, stress-free trip after all. Planning it out entirely defeats the purpose of that.

He needed to embrace a little bit of unexpectedness. You said it was “all part of the fun”. If he knew everything there was to expect, what would be the point in visiting?

Jamil saw what you were saying and admitted defeat. He gave you the benefit of the doubt and decided to have flexible and “loose” plans, as you suggested.

Meanwhile, Kalim had already thrown a whole “goodbye” party for him. Thank goodness that Kalim had gradually learned over the years to be more aware of Jamil’s wishes. They simply compromised on a small and humble party (even though Jamil would have preferred not to have one in the first place).

You came with Jamil to drop him off at the station where he was heading. You both exchanged your usual banter, and you wished him safe travels and for him to have fun especially.

You thought you imagined it, but before he was about to leave, he looked like he was about to say something else. And he definitely was about to. You'd never know what it was though.

Instead, Jamil simply bid you farewell.

As Jamil was walking away, you playfully shouted after him to not forget about you. It was only a joke (for the most part).

Jamil didn’t look back, but you know he rolled his eyes in exasperation. And he certainly did, which was followed by a soft smile on his face that you wouldn't get to see.

━━━━━━✦

Once he reached his destination, Jamil took in the new sights. He breathed in fresh air, his chest feeling lighter and more relaxed.

It felt wonderful that, in this place, he was just another face in the crowd. Nobody knows him. And he knows nobody. Everything was new and unfamiliar and he reveled in that feeling. You were right, it was better to experience these things firsthand as being there felt like a fresh start. Even though he knew that this anonymity would only be temporary.

One of the first things Jamil made sure was to keep his phone out of the equation. He needed to experience everything naturally without having the need to document what he saw as well as the stress of other people contacting him.

Jamil might have partially failed on the latter. He had to have his phone open for emergencies for certain people. Unfortunately, some worries and responsibilities can’t really fully leave him.

━━━━━━✦

Jamil first visited an antique clothing store. It was a charming and unique place filled with different kinds of wear, displays of jewelry and trinkets, and of course, the touristy souvenirs. Those were noticeably out of place, but it was to be expected.

Having experience and knowledge about his own job of being aware of what is around Scalding Sands, Jamil was delighted to know that the majority of the products in this store, at least, seemed to be of genuine quality.

Jamil may have to come back to this place. He thought you would really like that little trinket he saw through the window.

As Jamil strolled through, he was surrounded by a vibrant mix of sounds and colors adorning the streets. Individuals, families, tourists, and locals bustled about. There were even street entertainers as well as vendors who tried to sell him their wares, which was always amusing to say the least.

A catchy melody caught Jamil's attention, and he spotted a breakdancer performing on the street. He thought to himself that he might try out the routine for fun, and he'd ask what you would think. You'd enjoy the performance too, wouldn't you?

Jamil was exploring when he unexpectedly stumbled upon some festivities. It appeared to be the festival he had read about that he hadn't planned on participating in until later. Since he stumbled upon it now, he figured he might as well just check it out.

As Jamil looked around, he noticed a dance circle filled with people of all ages. Friends, families, and couples were all dancing together. He felt compelled to join in. It was as if the lively music and the enchanting atmosphere were inviting him personally, and he found himself dancing amongst the people.

The band played with much fervor, and the people were equally as energetic. Jamil was having fun. He caught himself laughing despite himself, his body swaying to the beat and in sync with the other dancers.

No one was here to judge him. No one to evaluate his front, or tell him to keep up an image. Jamil could easily just be himself. And after everything, he could easily choose to fade back into the background.

As soon as the energy died down for him, he looked back at the crowd. It still held the same energy when he went in, but he was personally spent.

Jamil wondered. If you were there, he might have enjoyed it more with you. That thought slipped through his mind, and immediately went away as it came.

The following days were a bit more mellow but still enriching. Jamil wanted to build up to an exciting finish but it seemed like the enjoyment peaked within the first few days.

The cuisine being served there was particularly fascinating. Jamil entered a restaurant, the aroma of delicious food enticing him in. He ordered dishes at a surprisingly decent price for the amazing quality they were being served. Seeing the way the dishes looked reminded him of how he had been getting better at making his own dishes more presentable. It still wasn't perfect; he could still learn more. He could actually take some inspiration from these dishes.

Jamil planned on researching more of the local cuisine once he returned. Then, he could try some rendition of his own and see what you think, as well as hoping that he could do these dishes justice.

━━━━━━✦

This isn't good.

Jamil felt... lonely?

He shouldn’t be feeling this way. What happened to enjoying this trip by himself?

Against everything Jamil told himself not to, he opened his phone and checked his messages, the majority of which were from people who inquired about his trip. This simply soured his mood. If Jamil had his phone ringing for them, he wouldn't have had a break. Why did he even open up his phone for this?

Oh, he knew why.

Your name specifically caught his eye with a preview of your message. He decided to open it up and he saw texts from you telling him to be safe and to have fun, which were basically the same things that you both exchanged when he left.

In the most recent text, you jokingly asked for him to send pictures, fully expecting that he wouldn’t. Admittedly, you were wondering what he was up to. You had really wanted to come with him but knew he really needed his trip for himself.

You felt a bit selfish sending that text because you knew Jamil shouldn't really be worrying about updating you or anyone else about what he was up to.

You didn't know that as soon as Jamil read that message, he briefly considered humoring you. He thought that perhaps he could take only a few photos here and there just to satisfy you. And then explain what else he had seen and experienced so far.

Jamil started to draft a message to send to you. He’s sure that you’d enjoy hearing all about it, plus it’ll be nice to have someone to share this experience with—

He paused at the thought. He saw that typed all he wanted to share at the moment, his finger hovering over the send button.

Wait a minute. No, no. What was he doing? Jamil quickly erased everything he typed out and shoved his phone back in his bag.

This experience was for him and himself only, at least for now. You’ll just have to wait once he returns from his trip.

━━━━━━✦

If Jamil was to be honest with himself, he had actually initially planned this whole trip with you in mind.

Throughout those months of planning, there was never a moment when he wasn't going back and forth with himself whether or not to include you in the trip.

You didn't know about this, of course. If he did manage to plan this whole trip with both of you, it would have been a surprise leading up to it.

But you yourself drilled into him how wonderful it was that he was finally able to go on a trip by himself. This was his very first opportunity to travel by himself and he doesn't know how long he will have that opportunity again. Perhaps it was your sentiments that finally convinced him that this trip was supposed to be for himself alone.

But deep in his heart, Jamil still felt something missing. He felt some kind of regret and longing that now he could not shake off.

As Jamil brooded to himself, he found himself standing in front of the antique store again. Once again, Jamil caught a glimpse of the trinket he had been eyeing the very first day he had been there.

━━━━━━✦

When you told him to not forget about you, you didn’t mean for him to take it so literally.

Jamil shrugged at the call-out, attempting to look unbothered. He had souvenirs for his family too, so it wasn’t like you were the only person he had on his mind.

But you just know he was embarrassed knowing that most of the souvenirs were meant for you. It was funny but really sweet. You assured him that you’d just return the favor next time.

Jamil really didn’t need you to, but perhaps it’ll also be payback enough for you occupying his mind while he was supposed to be away focusing on himself.

Maybe next time it'll be easier if Jamil would just bring you along.

[unluckilyimnot]

Listen, sooo...

I just saw a really cute tiktok and what would you say about the furin boys buying flowers, a little heart and this stuff as a suprise because she/they/...(?) Often baked something for him for example and when they give the gifts to their partner they start crying but like happy tears.

Like the previous partners didnt care enough for romance and this gesture is making them like really happy.

Hope you have a nice morning/day/night ♡

Gifts - sakura, suo, nirei, umemiya

m.list | rules

Note: hiii you're the first person to ask with them I'm so happy hihi that's very very cute and I like those kinds of base thank you so much!! Suo is maybe a bit ooc I'm sorry

Sakura

Sakura spent a lot of time in front of that stupid flower shop before finally getting in and finding what he was looking for.

For the past few weeks, his mind was busy with you and all the things you do for him without getting anything in return. That's when Suo and Nirei suggested to get you flowers as a gift, to show that he cared as well.

But Sakura never had to do anything like this and he was now waiting outside your school, a few meters away from the entrance, with a small but cute bouquet.

He could feel the gaze people were sending him and did his best to ignore it, reminding himself how it's important for you, so he doesn't have to be embarrassed of it.

When he finally catches sight of you walking out, he rushes to you. Trying his hardest to hide it behind his back to surprise you. Your eyes widened when he tended to you, looking away shyly, urging you to take it already.

"For the cookies you make all the time... We all love it. And, wait hey !"

The time his eyes fell on you again, tears built up in your eyes and were almost falling down your cheeks. He almost lost his grip on the bouquet in the rush to check on you, panic rushing through his body.

Why were you crying suddenly? Wasn't it supposed to make you smile?

He felt betrayed for a second before he noticed the smile on your lips. Shaking your hand to him to try to calm him you ended up giggling at his reaction.

"It's nothing, don't worry it's beautiful !" You said, as if you read his mind. "My previous partner didn't really care... so I'm just emotional."

His face softened and he got closer, pushing it into your hands this time.

"You shouldn't cry over this. I'll get you something better next time" he speaks his mind with a blush all over his cheeks. He looked away, not bold enough to stare at you after saying something like this. And you're reminded why you fell I'm love with him.

Suo

Suo notices for sure all the efforts you put in baking, or even cooking for him, and the gentleman that he has to pay you back. And make you feel as loved as he does every time he realizes the time you spend just to make him happy.

That's why on this Saturday, he arrived at your grandparents' place for your usual date with gifts in a bag.

You smiling at him makes his life easier and he's scared he's not doing enough to show you that. Keeping your pace with you, he still greets your grandma in the living room before going to your room.

As you sit on your bed, ready to tell him to join you, he tends you the bag with both hands.

"It's for you." He smiles, taking a close look at your reaction. "For all the things you do for me."

He didn’t know what he was expecting, but seeing you crying as the emotion got complicated on your face and you opened all the small gifts he got you wasn't on the list for sure.

You mumble something he couldn't get, about your ex but that's the only words he heard. Finally taking a seat next to you, he took your hands on his while brushing away your tears.

"I didn't hear you, my dear, what did you say ?"

"My ex never cared about that, so I'm just a bit overwhelmed," you sniffed why leaning slightly in his touch. You swear you could see his eyes softened as if he was already looking at you like the most precious things in the world.

Leaning in to kiss your lips, you could feel him smile, before he rested his forehead against yours.

"I have to make it up for that then."

 Nirei

"(Name) !" You jolted in surprise by the loud voice you know too much suddenly screaming.

Nirei has been looking for you all day, not remembering you mentioned you were busy helping Kotoha today. When it came back to his mind, you were on a break, taking a coffee with her. Both of you turned surprised to him but soon smiled at his relaxed expression. He must have run around the town just to find you.

“What are you carrying Nirei ?” asked Kotoha, laying a bit more on the counter. “It seems heavy. It’s from the citizens ?”

“Not at all ! Well, part of it no.” he giggled, a small blush showing up. He walked to you who hasn't spoken a word for the moment and handed the small, white bag to you. “It’s for you !”

Your eyes widened and you looked at him as if he was some kind of alien. For you ? 

“Me ?” The look in your eyes tells him all he has to know but he only nodded at you. 

“Yep, for all the time you baked for me !” 

Carefully taking the bag, you found all types of little things, from candy, charms for your phone to a new necklace and a card with a small note on it. As you looked at all those things you like so much, you felt tears coming to your eyes, burning a little, before your eyes fell on the note. You choked on your laughter and looked up to not ruin your makeup. 

Covering your face with your hand, you finally got up to take the very much puzzled Nirei. He was probably thinking of what he had done wrong, even though you were just so happy about it. 

“Thank you so much, Nirei. I never thought you’d love it so much.”

He couldn’t bring himself to ask anything, simply holding you closer. His heart’s lighter now that he heard you laugh.

Umemiya 

Since Umemiya heard you talked about your ex with Tsubakino, he was thinking of a way to make it up for you. He’s still upset that you were treated so poorly compared to what you do for others and desperately wishes to make you feel appreciated this time. 

He already had, what he thought, an idea, but he didn’t want you to guess so he had to organize it all somewhere you know. Not that he minded much. 

That’s why when he heard the rooftop’s door open behind him, he couldn’t wait to see your reaction. 

“Hajime ?” you looked around for him. “Why did you make me come this late, nobody’s there and- oh.” You stopped, a rather blank face at first as you looked around all the things he made up. 

Garlands were falling around the small space he used to eat with his friends, all kinds of food you liked on the table from what you could see and a small bag on the corner as well. You stayed silent for a second, mouth agape. Blinking a few times, your eyes finally fell on him. 

He had a huge, satisfied smile on his face, almost making you blush at the fondness dripping from it. He was patiently waiting for you to open your mouth to talk, rather than eating mosquitoes. 

“You prepared all of that ?” 

“Yep!”

“What for ?” you giggled nervously as you got closer, amazed, looking more carefully to what was on the table.

“Thank you. Because you’re always there for me, helping me, even cooking for me.” he explained calmly as he followed you around, half a step behind you. “You deserve it.” 

You choked on your laughter, feeling the tears coming to your eyes as he kept talking. “I don’t.” 

“Yes you do.” Before you could turn around, two strong arms wrapped around you, pulling you to his chest. Resting his head on yours, you muffled you cried in your hand but you could tell he was smiling. He must feel proud of himself, and he should. 

“That’s perfect, Hajime. Thank you so much.” your voice cracked, but you didn't really care. The ffelingof his hug tightening around you was enough.

Let me know if you liked it !

Reblogs are appreciated ♡

[ggsbooks123]

Memories — part two of memory garden

warning: gets pretty angsty here and character deaths 😓 mentions of suicide (jude bby is guilt ridden)

summary: you don’t know how much longer you can take it. The thoughts eating away at you telling you to kill someone in your heart you knew was pure good… but what happens when the voices turn on you?

a lil disclaimer yall i mixed cressidas name with cresta without thinking and realised half way through… i couldn’t be bothered to go back and fix it so i continued using it 😭 cresta is cressida!

— —

The next morning I woke up to Boggs shaking me and asked me to step outside, the sun was only just making its ascent.

I notice my restraint is off, Boggs must have taken them off before waking me up, I took a deep breath. I wasn’t sure why he had done it, I was in no right mind.

My eyes lifted at the doorway, Peeta was right there… No. I shook my head, following Boggs out the door.

He stood gazing over the destruction of the city, I tightened my fist when the echo of a voice tried to break through. Not now. This was the outcome of war and nothing I did to them now would prevent this. But the voices never agreed.

“Wanted to check how you were feeling after your first night” He explained once I joined him at his side, it was nice that he cared.

I shrug, glancing back over my shoulder “I don’t think it’s a good idea that i’m here, I was getting help back at the district… I don’t know why i’m here” I definitely didnt think it was a good idea, Coin had sent me here knowing i was far from recovery.

“Coin always has a reason” Boggs muttered like he’d been reading my thoughts “I think she has no use for Katniss and Peeta anymore-“ He eyes filled in the blanks his words didn’t…

“She sent me to kill them” I whisper back realisation smacking into, I was a weapon, again. But it wasn’t the capital this time, it was the rebellion.

When will i be free?

The voice sounds almost sad and I realise that it’s not a voice, it’s my own thoughts. My own depressing and given up thoughts.

“She can try and turn you into some psycho killer but the people in that room care about you, even if you don’t see it. So do I, the three of you kids have seen more hell than anyone deserves” Boggs explains, finally turning from the city to face me. “You’re just kids”

I frown, glancing down at my hands. Kids. We weren’t even eighteen years old, it was something that defined so much about someone and id forgotten.

“Thank you” I whisper, movement from inside alerts me and I reach for my gun, what if Peeta took this distraction as an opportunity but then Katniss stepped out, my heart didn’t slow but my hands dropped.

“What’re you doing out here so early?” Katniss asked stepping closer but keeping a respectful distance, my hand clenched.

She’s with Peeta, they will kill us all. The desire to kill Katniss was easier to push down but when it came to Peeta is was a thirst for blood like no other.

I shake my head, not hearing what Boggs responded with.

“How are things?” Boggs doesn’t respond to this question so I glance up and see they both have their attentions on me.

How are things? I wanted to scoff, but I knew that I was an accident waiting to happen, they didn’t know what would set me off. Apparently just saying how are things is one example. I shake my head and I notice the flash of concern.

“I can only get better right?” I spit, I don’t mean for it come out like that but she flinches and Boggs places his hand on her shoulder.

I feel it, my hand moving on its own before my right slapped down on it, instantly both their eyes slammed to me and without further explanation i declare, “We need to put my restraint back on”

And with that Katniss went inside and woke the others and Boggs cuffed me again.

Finnick was the first to step out, alongside a girl with a vines blooming flowers across the left half of her shaved head “Jude, I wanted you to meet Cresta, she’d one of the directors for this whole thing”

I smiled lightly at her, hoping to be polite since she no doubt had to stay up for an hour and watch me last night. “Nice to meet you, are you from the Capitol?”

She nods, “Do I give off that capitol ignorance?” She asked as a joke but in her eyes I could tell she was pleading I said no which made me smile slightly wider. I liked her.

“No, no. I was just asking didn’t mean to hit right on the money” I shrugged, “Maybe after this I could read palms?” I raise an eyebrow at Finnick who seems to just be smiling at me. “What?”

“Nothing, just glad you’re finally started talking about an after this” And with that Cresta and him left me, sending my mind reeling.

After…

— —

The next few days were especially hard, we had to travel a few streets at a time due to these devices called pods, the game makers had created them, no death should be boring apparently.

One of the pods had contained thousands upon thousands of snakes, luckily they seemed to stop at a certain point. Just like in the games except we could activate them from a distance.

Some of the other pods though, made it harder to remember where I was and who my friends are. Boggs had set off the last pod, four explosions had destroyed the road before them and each explosive made unbidden thoughts enter my head.

Now we were slowly making our way through the Capital streets, it seemed bizarre to think that it was once luxury.

“How’re you feeling?” His voice breaks through everything, and my neck snaps to him as I take a step back, bumping into Finnick who seems to have noticed why and is already guiding me to walk again.

Peeta frowns, turning away for a moment before looking back at me “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you” Maybe he was trying to be nice, because we both knew it hadn’t been the reason.

“It’s- It’s okay. Really. Just a lot going on, and I think I’m feeling better. The questions that i’m asking help” I respond, trying to stay calm and push the voices away, though they’re not really there at the moment.

He seems to perk at my words before shooting over his shoulder “Ask one now, can’t hurt” I blow a breath, rattling through my brain for anything and then it clicked.

We’re back in the 75th Hunger Games, it’s a couple days in and we look utterly spent, I don’t even look like i’m making my next five steps.

I try to remember when this was, must’ve been right before the arena been destroyed, Peeta and I had run into the Careers and I’d paid with three strikes to my chest, Peeta not much better off.

The thought of the wounds made me reach for my chest, but they were gone. Magically healed by the Capital just to be tortured mentally.

I watch myself trip slightly but Peetas there in an instant, arm looping around my waist, holding me for dear life.

It looked so natural. Right. Together, his eyes never leaving me, concern dripping with every blink.

I hear him whisper like he’s next to me “We’re almost at the beach alright, just a little further” I can feel the desperation in his words, he needed me to make it.

I remember the exhaustion now, the utter fatigue I felt. The thought to close my eyes was over bearing but I couldn’t let Peeta down… win, I couldn’t let him win!

I snap out of the memory, luckily Finnick has my arms in his hands because i’ve stopped again and Peeta is looking at me with concern over his shoulder every few seconds. “Jude?” Finnick whispers and I take deep breath.

“In the last Hunger Games,” I began, trying to sort out the memory, he was saving me or was he the reason I ended up at the Capitol? “You saved me after the Careers attacked us, real or not real”

He frowned at the question, was it concern or hurt in his eyes, I didn’t know because when he blinked it was gone but then he stopped turning to face me. This time Finnick doesn’t push me forwards. He didn’t save you, and now he knows that he can’t get away with his lies anymore. Kill him!

Before I could act on the voices that abruptly awokened he speaks up, “I got you to that beach, then the arena went out and the Capital got you. So yeah, I saved you from the Careers but I couldn’t save you from the Capital and it’ll kill me everyday that you had to go through that and this and I couldn’t do anything”

His voice grew more anguished and devastated with each word and I found tears falling down my own face as he took deep breaths in front of me. The old me would’ve known how much this was eating at him, would’ve helped him but how could I?

I didn’t know me anymore. Or what I could do before I snapped.

I didn’t know what to say so I said “Haymitch told me that I- I told them if it came down to it, to save you” His eyes sharpened on me somehow, “I don’t blame you for what happened in the Capital, I never will. I’m sorry”

The air hung still as Boggs turned to them finally, breaking the moment “Keep up! We haven’t got all day” Peeta sighed, glancing at Boggs before solely landing on me again.

“Real. I saved you from the Careers” I smiled lightly, kill him, I shoved it down not paying any attention to it.

“Thank you” Finally, we began to follow the others down and around another corner. Soon we were arriving at our next pod, this one had a large arch with completely and utterly destroyed walls surrounding it left to right.

More destruction passed as they continued, how long before it’s too much, until the city isn’t even salvageable. Boggs told us to hide behind the walls while he set it off the next pod and then checked for anymore. We did as told, I took position between Finnick and Katniss and two other guys i didn’t know, Peeta and Cresta, Jackson and Pollux on the other side.

I felt anticipation, the voice had free roam when the pods went off. Too much going on at once, I couldn’t control it.

The pod detonation sent my mind spiraling, as I assumed, this one, four guns emerged from the wall and rained bullets into the archway destroying bits of the wall they were behind.

If you killed them their symbol would be gone, who would push that hope and if not for Katniss and Peeta, it would die with them. The voice stronger than it’d been in days.

No! I crouched further agaisnt the wall we’d taken cover behind, I’d been given my blank gun back for the promo but this was all too much, I felt the butt of the gun against my temple as I curled into my self.

I bring my head up and smack it against the gun, get out of my head. Get out. Get out! “My favourite colour is purple, I can’t wear red bows. Peeta saved me. My favourite-“ I repeat the words, whispered and keep bringing the butt of my gun to my temple.

A hand on my shouldern brings me back, at first my eyes catch the utterly devastated ones across from me. Peeta. He looks like he’d burn the world… For me. I break the eye contact quickly and the look in Finnicks eyes said it all. He didn’t have to go through what I had to understand, I didn’t know if I’d be able to do this without him, or Peeta… No matter how much I wanted to kill him sometimes.

Suddenly an explosion going off catches us off guard, did they set off another pod? “Boggs!” Katniss screams break the air, Finnicks hands move under my shoulders and lifts me to my feet, hauling me around the corner.

We both freeze at the sight, easily three of our squad members had been hit by the bomb. But it’s Boggs who lays in Katniss’s arms that makes my stomach drop and I’m almost sure I would have crumbled if not for Finnick. Bogg’s legs were gone, nothing but two stumps and onrushing blood.

Oh god, oh god. I slam my eyes shut and a ringing breaks out in my head. This is my fault, it’s all my fault, I never should have trusted them, Boggs should have never trusted them. The thoughts come harsher than they have in weeks and I can’t break away from them.

Kill them before they kill us all. This one isn’t my voice and I snap my eyes open sure I’d see his old and drawn face in front of me, but he’s not there. Relief fills me, but the twitch in my hand isn’t as my eyes dart to Peeta.

He must’ve been hit by the backlash of the bomb, Jackson was helping him to his feet as Cresta was helping one of the twins, who’d I forgotten were even there amongst all the chaos. His blue eyes darted around until they met mine and then they drifted to my hands.

I was holding my gun… I didn’t remember grabbing it, and it was full of blanks but it could still be a weapon. Kill him, I shake my head taking a step back at the same time I hear a click from afar, my head shoot’s up and I look to see l the other twin had rushed to help the other and had set off another pod.

I flinched ready for another bomb but instead the walls to the archway we just entered and the three others all begin to close, Katniss now standing from Boggs and holding the device he had seems to catch sight before anyone of us and the look of horror on her face is enough “Run!”

An arm grabs me and yanks me forward but my hands tighten on my gun, it was his fault. I can’t shake away these thoughts anymore, not after Boggs.

“Jude, keep it together!” Finnick spoke from beside me but nothing could bring me back, not after everything, everything that he’d done.

I felt my mind unscrewing, going barbaric at the thought of Peeta being so close and safe, he would make it out of this courtyard. And I tried to fight every single part of me that wanted to change that.

I couldn’t… Not after Boggs. You’re just kids, Peeta was a kid that had been the reason of hundreds and thousands of people… He had to die.

The air thrums around us as we rush up the stairs and I take this moment to look over my shoulder, a wave of black liquid lurches towards us and with utmost certainty I don’t want to find out what happens if it reaches me but then my mind flicks.

No consequences, kill him and die knowing you saved innocents. I wanted to shake these thoughts away, Peeta rushing up behind me tells me that he’d probably only run when he realised I was safe but a larger part of me knew he had some hidden agenda to kill me and cause more harm than good.

I had time.

It was the last confirmation I needed, shoving Finnick off me and throwing myself at Peeta, I let one of hands release the gun as I grab for his shoulder but his foot catches something and I only manage to grab his shirt as we go rolling down a few of the steps as he tries to fight off my grip, I hoped I had timed it right.

“Jude! Don’t” He cried out, finally managing to grab my wrist so I raise the gun in the other, “You have to die” I whisper, unsure why I needed to say it before I bring down the gun and finally, finally-

I’m shoved, NO. Snow’s voice screams in my head and I let out a cry, the yell breaks my skull open and I feel every ounce of rage pouring from the word.

His anger becomes my own and fuels me as I jump up from the ground and grapple the man from our squad who had ruined ruined ruined everything.

I knew it was wrong, some part of me as my ears rang and my mind exploded, but I couldn’t stop stop stop. The liquid rushed behind the man in my arms now, we’d spun, had I done that? Before my foot lifted and connected with his middle and I sent him into the abyss of oil.

Then it was all gone, the ringing, the voices and my mind was clear. I just killed a man. Someone must have grabbed me because i’m moving but I don’t feel it and I don’t care I’d killed someone, killed killed killed.

I feel the tears now as a door slams shut behind me and I hauled up my stairs, these are wooden not stone. The voices come back but they are no longer on my side. And it’s my own voice.

You killed an innocent. You need to die, you’re a danger. And I agree, I scream and scream that I want nothing more than to be dead and I must’ve actually been screaming because soon all I see is the same abyss I had forsaken another to.

— —

An explosion wakes me up and proceeds to remind me of everything that had happened before I succumbed to the darkness, I took in my surrounding the only light coming from the curtained window that Katniss and Gale were peering out of.

Whatever had just happened outside had affected Katniss more than Gale, and as I shift my position to get a better look but it’s useless, Gale lets the blinds close.

I let my eyes dance around the room, there’s more people in our group than I had realised, two men sat together checking the other for injuries, another man I seen but still didn’t know the name of stood with Cresta while Finnick and Peeta sat watching the window that Katniss and Gale were at. Jackson was no where in sight, I didn’t want to see her anyways, the guilt would twist even further. The twins… gone.

I swallow the sickness I feel, I had been so crazed I hadn’t taken the time to even get to know them.

All of the squad was far from me, I realised I was placed on stairs and the rail along it is what my hands are cuffed to.

Now you can’t hurt anyone. That hadn’t changed, no longer would I fight the urge to kill Peeta, somehow my wish of not killing him had been granted. Now I had to try not to kill myself, though that statement was half hearted.

Suddenly the familiar ring of the Capitals announcement played and my veins grew cold until one of the squad members spoke up “All the tvs in Panem are connected to the announcements, if the powers on then the shows running”

I rolled my eyes, the power that they could flush into abandoned apartments was incredible when some districts could barely keep the lights on for an hour or half.

The anthem continued, causing me to close my eyes but that only let the voices free reign in the darkness.

You could’ve been helping them stop this instead you let the Capital control you. I grit my teeth together not being able to take in what was happening on screen from the inner battle I was having with my own thoughts. You nearly killed Peeta and you were proud of it.

I nearly threw up.

My skin was on fire, pure and unadultered disgust and shame with myself, how could I have not realised that killing Peeta was the worst possible thing I could do, I would be nothing. Nothing, there was no way to put into words what would happen if he died.

And by my own hand, I closed my eyes. No. Never again would I let them win, hurt him. Never. I’d kill myself before I ever did something like that again… If I was even given the chance of redemption after what I did.

I open my eyes as I hear my name mentioned and see that the Capital is replaying everything that’s been haunting me since i woke up.

I watch the black oil like substance hurtle it’s way towards us, and I see it clearly now, Peetas eyes are on me waiting until I’m safe and clear before he runs after me and in that split second decision i’ve made one aswell.

Watching it on the screen was horrifying, my arm reaching for his throat but finding his shirt instead, us rolling together and still the look of murder on my face, so twisted it doesn’t even look like me before Mitch yanked me off and I thanked him by kicking him into the pod trap.

His scream echoed through the screen and I flinched, I’d been so full of rage and out of it I hadn’t heard it or seen as a metal cage lined with spikes shot from the oil, encasing the now dead Mitch.

I close my eyes unable to watch the rest. Monster, monster, monster. My voice spits over and over again, these I can’t shut out. It’s simply my thoughts the more I push it triples.

“Well, what’s next?” Jackson asked out of sight, I glanced around the room yet none of them seemed to look at me. I understood why they wouldn’t, some of them knew Mitch.

I killed their friend. Yet no one responded.

Was it not obvious? “I- I killed him” I whispered, all of their heads snapped like my voice was the last they expected “You should either leave me here or put a bullet in my head so no one else dies”

In the corner of my eye I see a hint of blonde flinch at my words, but I’d nearly killed him if it wasn’t for Mitch… Now he was dead, I didn’t get to live. “It’s the only reasonable solution, you can’t tell me i’m wrong”

“You’re wrong” Peeta cut in before anyone else could agree or disagree, I couldn’t tell by their faces and yet none of them cut into Peeta “You are restrained and we have a watch on you, Mitch knew what he was signing up for, we all did”

I looked away from him. This wasn’t right, my thoughts were against me now but what happened when they turned on him again? Because they would.

“You saved me once, you’ll be saving me this time aswell if you just-“

“No”

My eyes met his and I knew I’d never seen the fire in his gaze that he’d held this moment, Peeta was not budging on this. I frowned, I was a liability why couldn’t he see that?

My mind flashed to solutions, none came to mind. “There has to be a way where if I know i’m going to snap that I can stop myself” My words break at the end as I gaze around the room, there’s only silence “Please… please”

Gale steps forward and I see Peeta take a step but Katniss stops him, and I’m grateful as the brunette boy crouches down and pulls something from a hidden pocket.

A small pill, it was hard to think it’d do what i asked, delicately Gale pushed the pill into my own hidden pocket and patted it “It’s Nightlock, no pain and instant. Only if you have to”

I nodded, hesitantly but promising “Only if I have to”

And with that they set out, planning a course of action. The pods were too often now, they would have to stop constantly.

It was time to go underground

—

- … sooo part three?!?

—

DONT SCREAM AT ME IK IM AN ASSHOLE IM SO SO SO SORRY FOR MAKING YALL WAIT MY GOODREADS GOAL WAS SLACKING HAD TO CATCH UP HOPE YALL LIKE THIS XXXX

taglist girlies💓: @yazminetrahan @solarbxby @abbersreads @antonietta18

[e-m-ma-lmfao]

hi! i literally love how you write❤️

could you write a fluff with a little bit of nsfw (if you dont take nsfw requests, just do it all fluff, i love fluff so i doesnt bother me) with a fem reader x cloud?

here's how i want the story, but you can obviosuly change it to your preferences.

y/n was a childood friend of cloud,and she didnt see him in A LOT of years. then she encounters him and they basically talk about rhe the good old times. a month passes and it's y/n's birthday, they all celebrate at the bar and give y/n a present. then it's cloud turn to give her the present, and he gives her a boquet and a letter with some photos from much years ago. after that, he kisses her and she kisses back. after the birthday party, cloud was a little bit drunk so y/n took him at her house to take care of him and cloud gets all clingy and says things to y/n. (if you want to add some nsfw, you can add it in this part of the story)

thank you❤️

Happy Birthday Slowpoke

pairing : cloud strife x fem! reader

description : an unexpected reunion leads to birthday wishes, unspoken love confessions, and drunken kisses.

warnings : small make out sesh but no smut, drinking alcohol (clouds gets drunk)

Sector 7 gets quieter at night. Never silent. But quiet. Walking through the streets is much nicer at night when there aren't so many people pushing to get through. It’s easier to think. Easier to take in your surroundings. 

There’s a certain hum that brings you comfort as you walk through the nearly empty streets. You remember when you first came to Sector 7, nervous and scared, and still dealing with the aftershock of Nibelheim. 

Nibelheim. Cloud.

God. How was he still stuck so deep in your head after years? 

You missed him. Him and his stupid blond hair. 

It was embarrassing how fast your head would turn at the sight of any blond man. Any. Even children sometimes. You had to catch a second glance to make sure you hadn’t just seen your childhood friend run past you as he giggled with his friends. It was never him, but you hoped. 

The peace of your walk was disturbed by a man walking past you. Bright blond hair fluff led up like the feathers of a chocobo in black clothes, and heavy footsteps. He pays you no mind as he walks past you, but you force yourself to do a double take. 

But this man is different. Even with his back turned to you he feels familiar. His hair stands up, the way Clouds did when he was a child. He’s dressed in the garb of a SOLDIER with a big sword on his back, Clouds always promised he’d become a SOLDIER. And he even walks the same way Cloud would as a kid, trudging along his path, god forbid someone think of him as anything but independent.

It all feels too coincidental. And without thinking your lips open to speak, “Cloud?” 

“Hm?” The man turns, only his head and shoulder so as to not pay you too much care, to face you. And your mind is flooding with nostalgia.

You're running after a young boy, blond haired, breathless laughs leave yours and his mouths. 

“Cloud!!! Wait for me!!” You squeal after the older 

boy whose legs carry him much faster than you can keep up with. And your tired legs, mixed with your lack of available air, are making it harder to match his pace. 

For a minute you think he doesn’t hear you, or maybe, that he doesn't want to listen. But soon enough he skids to a stop, looking back at you as he pants lightly. He wears a stupid smile on his face, cheeks flushed.

“Sorry y/n.. I keep forgetting I’m too fast for you. Your little legs can’t keep up,” He teases and lets out a juvenile giggle.

Finally you meet his side, matching his breath, “They can so!”. 

“Yeah right slow poke.” A childlike pout appears on your face, fitting for an 8 year old you. Always pouting. Always following after Cloud. 

You were never really sure why Cloud kept you around. But when you were kids, it never really mattered for more than a second. You just liked being around him, and him you.

“It’s not fair. You're older, your legs are longer!” He smiles down at you, laughing between heavy breaths.

“Only a year older.” 

“Still!” He stays quiet for a minute, letting you catch your breath without teasing you further. 

When you finally straighten back up, he’s still showing a giddy smile on his lips. Without a word, he grabs your hand in his, and takes off running the same way he had been before. Only this time you can keep up with him, pulled behind him.

“Cloud!” 

“Hm?” He turns to look behind him, a wide smile full of teeth on his face and eyes bright and blue. Still hopeful. 

His eyes meet yours and you realize the same blue eyes are looking into yours, only they are tired and the hope of his youth has been long gone. Yours probably look the same, usually. But right now they are wide and beginning to tear up. And his pupils, blown in recognition, are nearly as wide as yours.

“Y/n?”

“Cloud!” In an instant you latched onto him, arms wrapped tightly around his torso. Your face squished against his hard chest, probably wetting the front of his tank top from the tears slipping from your eyes.

He’s hesitant, but eventually one hand lands on your back and the other grabs onto your waist, pulling you in impossibly closer to his body. When you were kids, hugs were nothing out of the ordinary, but this one feels so different. You’ve been longing to hug him since you were 13, longing to see him since you were 17.

It’s overwhelming, the amount of emotion flowing through your body. You're happy to see your best friend again. You're sad that you haven’t seen him in so long. And you're angry that he left without ever saying goodbye. 

“Y..you.. are you real?” 

You look up to find his voice, wiping away the wetness from your face. His hands move to touch your face, then to your shoulders and finally fall to his sides. 

“Yes, Cloud. I'm real. When..how.. It’s been years Cloud.” 

“I know.”

There are a million things you’d like to say to him. You’d like to scream at him and punch at his chest until he bruises, not likely you could hit him hard enough to leave any marks but you’d try. But then you want to hug him, and run through the streets with him hand and hand like when you were kids. You don’t know what to say to him, where to start, or if you even should. 

“I missed you.” 

“I know.” He doesn’t say it back, and the lack of emotion that he shows is almost aggravating. But you don’t make it known to him how annoyed you are at him for his underwhelming reaction to this reunion. 

You invite him back to your apartment and, with a lot of convincing no and many ‘pleases’, he agrees to join you for an hour tops. His hesitancy hurts your feelings, you don’t admit that to him though, god forbid he realize that you hadn’t changed much since you were young. Since he clearly had. 

“You can sit down, you know.” He raises his brows, your acknowledgment of his awkwardness unexpected, but he takes a seat at your small table. The chair he sits in is the perfect size for you, and while he’s not the tallest man you’ve ever encountered, he almost seems to not fit on it. 

He is so silent, it stirs up years of pent up sadness and frustration deep within you, and inside you deeper still a fury of anger festers. But you push it away, locking those emotions up for another night when you haven’t just stumbled into your best friend of 10 years after 4 years of being apart. And you offer him a drink. 

“Are you gonna tell me what you’ve been up to for the last 4 years?” He is silent, stoic, hides his face by taking a sip from the glass of water you offered him.

“Not tonight.” Your teeth grind together inside your mouth, holding back your tongue from spewing words better left unsaid. He must see the clench in your jaw, the anger and disappointment in your eyes, “But another time. I will.” 

You fill the rest of the night with slow, and awkward, conversation. He doesn't make much effort to initiate it, but he answers your earnest questions without any complaint. At least the ones that don’t involve his work, his past, his lack of a goodbye. So the night moves slowly.

It doesn’t feel like very long has passed at all by the time he tells you he has to leave. 

“Already?” 

“Yes. I’m sorry, my days are busy.” 

“Are you staying in Sector 7?” He nods, you're not appreciating this strong and silent thing he has going on. 

“Working?” Another nod. “Well..if you find yourself free next month, we’re celebrating my birthday at the Seventh Heaven..uh.. it’s Tifa's bar actually.!”

“I know.”

“Oh.. yeah I guess, you would’ve gone to see her.” 

“I didn’t go t- .. I’m sorry. I should go.” He walks to the door, posture straight and stoic expression broken by a look of pity for just a moment. You walk him out. 

You can’t help yourself from speaking as your eyes meet his back, your mind is lacking in self restraint tonight, “Will you come?” 

He faces you, mouth parted before a small smile plants itself there, “I’ll try, y/n, goodnight.” And he’s gone into the night with quickened steps.

“Hey! Have some faith in him. I’m sure he’ll make it.” Tifa leans over the counter with a bright smile, sliding a drink into your hands. 

“Yeah, I’m sure.” 

The bar isn’t full, but the people that matter are here, most of them anyway. 

Biggs and Wedge, probably already tipsy based on the volume they're producing, are playing darts in the corner. Barret sits on the other end of the bar, Marlene seated beside him as they whisper between each other. And Tifa stands in front of you, a positive grin lingering on her face. 

“Y/n!” Marlene springs off the barstool, with the help of her father, and rushes over to you with a clumsily wrapped gift in her hands. 

“For me? Well thank you, Marlene.” You smile down at her, gently taking the gift from her hands and unwrapping it to find a bracelet made of beads and charms. 

“I made it for you. And I have one too! See?” She holds up her wrist, which you hadn’t realized was hidden behind her back, to show you the matching bracelet she wears. You lift into your arms, holding her in a tight hug. 

“They’re perfect Marlene, thank you.” 

With her still in your arms, you resume conversation with Tifa, and are promptly joined by Barret. You love them, like family of course. But you are so focused on the lack of Clouds presence that you forget to fully no appreciate the ones around you. 

Tifa reaches behind her, into the fridge and pulls outs an obviously homemade cake. “We decorated it together,” She slides a wink Marlene’s way and begins lighting the candles. “Make a wish y/n.” 

You think for a moment, it’s childish that you're hoping for your wish to work so genuinely, but you take a deep breath and blow out your candles with a heavy breath. One sweep. 

“What’d you wish for y/n?” Marlene’s voice is loud beside you. 

“Hey now.. you know the rules, I can’t tell you or else it won’t come true.” She pouts for a minute but her smile quickly returns when Tifa hands her a piece of cake. You take your own piece in your hands, sharing a smile with Tifa and Marlene. 

“Hey man! Good to see you. Glad you could make it.” 

Your eyes are moving faster than you can focus on the sound of Biggs’ words, finding the one person your wish standing in the doorway. In his hands he holds a bouquet, flowers of your favorite colors wrapped with paper and a pink bow.

He approaches you with a sheepish smile on his face, “Sorry I’m late. I didn’t know what to get you as a gift, I hope I got the colors right. Oh! And there’s this,” He reaches into his back pocket and hands you a sealed envelope. On its cover, your name is written in messy writing.

“These are ..beautiful, Cloud, thank you.” 

“Drink?” Tifa is cheery, as always, if not more so. 

“Yeah, thanks.” He takes a seat beside you and you try to hide the way your eyes linger on him. The muscles in his grown arms. The familiarity of his spiky hair. You're not so angry anymore, now that you've had time to process his return, rather longing for the relationship you had as kids. The closeness you’d been lacking in your friendships since he left.

“Are you gonna open it?” 

“What?” His voice brings you back to the moment, and you realize you’ve been ogling at him.

“The envelope..” 

“Oh! Yeah, right. Yeah.” 

You reach for it and carefully open it, trying not to rip the paper too badly. Tucked inside the envelope is a photo of the two of you as children and a folded up letter, reading : 

This is stupid. But I tried to write something so I wouldn’t have to say all this out loud.

I haven’t been around for a long time, so I don’t really know where we stand anymore. But as far as I know, you’ve been the only person I’ve been able to open up to about everything. 

Without you, I probably would’ve spent my childhood alone. 

When we were kids, I swore I’d be a SOLDIER. But to be honest it wasn’t all I thought it would be. And I’m sorry I left you for shinra.

And I know I should’ve said goodbye, and I probably hurt you when I left. But I’m here now, and I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon. 

You were my best friend or you are my best friend, doesn't matter. 

Happy Birthday Slowpoke.

He looks at you intensely as he tries to gauge your reaction. It’s a simple letter, and could be written by a child with a little effort. But it’s Cloud, and it’s the most you can ask from a man like him. It still has your hands wiping at your eyes.

“Hey, did you make her cry? No crying on your birthday!” Tifa returns, leaning over the counter to slide Cloud his drink, looking over at you. “Y’alright?”

“Yeah I’m okay. I’m really good actually, thank you.. for this, Cloud”.

He nods, and you swear his cheeks redden, but he looks away before either you or Tifa can comment on it.

Cloud's drink is gone in moments, and he is asking for another, whilst making comfortable conversation with you. A ‘happy birthday’ ‘how’s your day been’ ‘what do you do for work now’ kind of comfortable. He doesn’t ask anything personal, does not dwell on the past, you almost wish he would. 

But you indulge him and his calculated questions, being satisfied with any conversation at all, and let the night flow.

It doesn't take long to realize that Cloud is not a drinker, or at least that he does not know his limits. It’s dark out now, and music plays from the jukebox, and Cloud sways drunkenly to a song. You can’t help but laugh, whilst also feeling weird seeing him be so free and not high strung. Not a SOLDIER, just a man.

He stands up, grabbing onto your arm to pull you over in front of the jukebox where Wedge is dancing with Tifa. 

“Careful Cloud!” You stumble after him, bumping into his chest as he pulls you. He doesn’t seem to notice, grabbing onto your hands to spin you and move you around. 

“You're a pretty good dancer now,” He moves you to face him, moving to the music still with a goofy smile on his face, “Do you remember.. when we..when we were kids and you would step on my feet ..everytime we danced.” 

You giggle at his slurred words, “You're so drunk right now.” 

“And you’re ..sso pretty..” He moves in closer, close enough that you can smell the liquor lingering on his lips. 

“Oh wow.. you're really drunk.. haha.” You make no effort to move away from him, but you laugh at his actions to relieve the awkwardness flowing from your body. 

“Mhm..” He closes the gap and places his lips against yours. Your hands find his chest, eyes falling close as you kiss him back. Your self control is weak, and you want to keep his lips against yours. But he's drunk, and your head is starting to spin.

Somehow you find the strength to push him away and he moves away with a pout on his puffy lips. 

“Let’s.. uh.. get you home, yeah?” 

“But I’m having fun!” He attempts to spin you, but he ends up making himself dizzy, “Actually, yeah.. that’s probably a good idea.”

“Yeah.” You laugh at his flushed face, holding onto his arm as you say goodbye to everyone and leave the bar.

“Can we go to yours?” He doesn't let go of you, even after you’ve walked halfway down an empty Sector 7 road, but he has instead moved his grip to hold your hand to keep you close to him.

“My apartment?” 

“Mhm.”

“Yeah..yeah sure.” He leads you to your own apartment like he knows the route by heart, he’s only been there once and yet he acts like he lives there by the speed he finds it.

Once inside he collapses onto your bed, not much space in the apartments, so you suppose that was normal considering there was no couch. 

“Do you want some water?” He shakes his head, laying on his back to stare up at the ceiling. 

You move towards the stereo on the opposite wall, turning on the radio so there is noise for you to focus on instead of his arms as they rest underneath his head.

“I missed you too .. y'know.” Clouds words barely make their way to you, his voice quiet and music humming just loud enough.

“Hm?” You turn to face him, moving to sit on the ledge of the bed in front of where he lays. 

“The night I saw you,” He leans on his elbow to hold himself up, “you said that you missed me. and I didn’t say it back. I did. I missed you. I just didn’t know what to say to you then.”

You don’t say anything, you're not sure what to say anyways. 

He looks into your eyes for a few minutes before pulling you by your arm so you lay beside him, but he shifts positions so he holds himself above you with his hands. 

“Can I kiss you?” 

“Yes.”

His lips meet yours once more. But unlike the bar this kiss is calculated, not clumsy and childish. He is drunk, and it’s obvious by the taste that remains on his lips even after he has licked them clean multiple times.

Your fingers find his hair, his knee finds its way between your legs and your chest begins to move quicker. He moves to latch his lips onto your neck, sucking spots that will definitely be purple and red tomorrow, while his hands find their place under your shirt on your hips.

And while you’d love for Cloud to continue his journey, the fact remains that he is drunker than a teenager on their 18th birthday, and you want this moment to be one enjoyed sober. So you pull his head up to meet his eyes, and very puffy lips. 

“Your drunk Cloud. I think we better save this for another night.” 

He pouts, face flushed, but he nods with a sigh. Getting comfy he finds a place to rest his head, on your chest, but his hands don’t move from your skin. If anything you feel his grip tighten, keeping you close as he practically lays on top of you. 

“I missed you, a lot. I thought I'd never see you again when you left.” Your fingers find his hair once more, rubbing at his scalp and playing with blond strands.

“I know. I didn’t think I’d see you either.” 

The room is quiet, except for the soft hum of music flowing from the stereo. His fingers tense and relax again in sync with his slow breaths, moving to trace the softness of your skin. But eventually his movements stop and he seems to still. 

“Cloud?”

There are still a million things you’d like to ask, like to say. And so many years of words you’d like to catch up on between him, months of love confessions that you had admitted to Tifa that you’d like to share with him. But the soft snores that begin to leave his mouth tell you he’s in no mood to talk right now.

“Goodnight soldier..”

[mrsnerdygirl]

I was thinking right now about how sad it is that Harry never properly celebrated his birthday. You know how we go all out on children's birthdays, inviting people and making theme parties, well Harry never had that .

On his first birthday, he celebrated over a small tea "party" , with his parents and Bathilda, with no other family members and friends around . In her letter , Lily said that it was okay since he wouldn't remember, and while she was right , the fact that it was his first and last birthday with his parents and it wasnt even proper, saddens me so much .

Growing up i know for a fact that the Dursleys didn't celebrate his birthday. Remember when he went to Hogwarts and for Christmas they send him a single toothpick ? What about Dudley's hand-me-downs? Sometimes i actually think that they didnt even tell him untill he started attending kindergarten, or sometime earlier when his birthday was . I belive that it was easier that way for them , not having to bother with his questions , but of course when Harry saw that there were no children like him , with no parents, loved ones , or idea as to when they were born , he started asking questions.

Something that i had forgotten about , and only remembered when i reread Chamber of Secrets, is that for his birthday, Harry sang to himself the Happy Birthday song, and that broke my heart . Just thinking about how many times he had to do that because noone cared is terrible.

The fact that the second birthday cake he ever got was when he was eleven , a grown boy, is even worse .

On the third book , he doesnt even recall it being his birthday, he completely forgets about it , that's how little birthdays mean to him .

"He never got to celebrate a birthday with Sirius" , now that line destroyes me, because i know sirius felt terrible for missing his godson's birthday, and i also know that getting a letter saying Happy Birthday, is all Harry wanted , because growing up he didnt even get as much as that .

His sixteenth birthday was the only one that came closest to a nice celebration, Harry had Remus , the Weasleys, so practically most of his loved ones , but i know for a fact that not having Sirius there , and having lost him just a month ago tore the boy to pieces. There was a war going on and he wasnt safe , especially at that time, so of course it wasnt the best , and in my opinion what he deserved.

On his seventeenth , he was worrying about the fact that in a week he would be god knows where , doing god knows what . Voldemort was more powerful than ever, and i think that the only time he was a little at peace was when Ginny gave him her present . It was the first time Harry didnt mention the war , or the deaths of people , or his approaching death , he was at peace and that was short lived because he got into a fight with Ron and then he was feeling miserable because reality hit him harder than ever , he realised he didnt have a future ahead, and that this could be his last birthday for all he knew.

When he finally started enjoying his day , the minister arrived and ruined everything. After he left so had some of the guests, and the ones that were left seemed to feel uncomfortable.

Im sure that when the war was over , he didn't celebrate his birthday, i dont think he cared much , especially knowing what happened just a couple of months ago and how selfless he is .

So knowing that today he is celebrating makes me feel good . Knowing he has a family now , and that there is no ministry or Voldemort chasing his guests away is amazing. If anyone deserves a good birthday, that person is Harry James Potter.

[thekingofwinterblog]

Fundamental Flaws

So one interesting thing i noticed about the League's flaws, is that the things that kept them from working together at the start, remained the basic flaws that prevented them from helping each other overcome their own flaws.

Namely that they all joined together out of convinience, and they never really got to the level where that actually changed.

When Himiko joins the league, she introduces herself with her seemingly rather confusing motives, namely that she wants a world that is easier for her to live in.

Shigaraki does not understand her wishes at all, and of course lashes out shortly after this after dabi has introduced himself as well, having deemed both of them as not the sort he wants to hang around him.

Dabi by contrast doesnt even try to explain his motives or goals beyond the very vague "fullfill stain's will."

The end result of this is that Shigaraki doesnt even attempt to understand either, and decides to just kill them.

The funny thing is... this kinda attitude never really changes.

Compress even notes it as one of the main reasons he loved the league so much. it didnt pry into his backstory and just took him in regardless.

This attitude is what managed to bring the league together as a force... but it also prevented them from truly truly growing as a group.

Because of the fact nobody wanted or even tried to learn each other's backstories and deeper motivations, none of them ever managed or tried to Help Dabi make a possible future for himself where he could get his vengeance on Endeavor, and still get to live afterwards, instead they just let him burn on, even encouraging him to do so, with the end result that he came to a hellish innevitable march towards death.

Dabi himself tried to help Toga emotionally by setting her childhood home ablaze and rally her heart towards vengeance and freedom, because that's what he is motivated by, but he completely failed to understand what she actually wanted out of life, the reason why out of the entire league, the only person she was able to transform into was Twice, because he was the only one who actually tried to understand her.

This in turn means that Toga ultimately ended up seeking what she truely wanted amongst the heroes, and finally found in uraraka, what she had been afraid to seek/never got from most of the league.

Something that ultimately cost them the war.

this is best showcased when Shigaraki actually lays out his motivations and feelings for villainy, and the rest of his crew(other than spinner) is either completely disinterested, dissapointed or confused.

None of them actually cares about Shigaraki's motives other than spinner, not even Twice.

only spinner and the doctor(who doesnt give a shit about Shigaraki himself) actually cares at all.

of the rest, the only one who even attempts to understand Shigaraki is Toga, and not because she cares about how he feels about it, but because she begun to realise that her goals and interests are ultimately incompatible with shigaraki's(something that would come to fruition during the final arc).

Out of the league, the only one who even tried to understand and did care about shigaraki's motives, and attempted to figure out how they allign with his own wishes, is spinner, and it's not a coincidence that at the very end, he is the only one Shigaraki left his final words to, even if Shigaraki loved the other main members of the league.

The five people Shigaraki Tomura truly cared about in his hearts of hearts at the end... But even here where his feelings are laid bare, there is also another, sad truth.

Kurogiri, the man who effectively cared for Shigaraki as his own son isnt included amongst them.

Kurogiri is a rather complicated character, but it's clear by his final words, that he truly loved the league, just like compress did, and hoped they would be reunited in whatever came next.

It's not clear WHY shigaraki felt like this(maybe once he learned the man was a Nomu that pretty much sealed his ability to think of him as an actual person) but it goes to hammer in the fact that the league was just on a fundamental level not able to try to reach out and understand the motivations of each other.

the main exception to this, and the only one who seems to at least have wanted to understand everyone else is Twice, withouth any doubt the true heart of the League of Villains. The only one who everyone, even cold, brutal dabi considered a close friend.

he is the only one who understood Toga, who always opened his heart bare for the entire league, and when it seemed Hawks was about to join that number, he did everything he could to make him feel welcome and to actually understand what hawks was teaching him.

it's not a coincidence that it is when he dies, that the league really begins to come loose at the seams.

Dabi completely loses it in a way he hasnt done since the time he snapped and tried to kill shoto as a baby, and afterwards any and all morals and reservations completely evaporates in his heart, which is is replaced by a fire that doesnt go out until he literarily cant do anything anymore, having become a burnt out husk.

Toga as to confront the fact that she is living in a fantasy and has to actually commit to the league and it's goals or go her own way.

Mr compress tries to step up to fill in the void Twice left behind, but the grandpa of the group ultimately realizes that somebody is gonna have to sacrifice it all, and decides that like any good father figure, the duty will fall to him. Thus any wisdom he might have been able to impart to the next generation is lost when he becomes the next leaguer to fall right after twice.

But he could have shared these bits of wisdom at any time before this... his goals, his background, the origins of his unique insight into the world. But he didnt. only here, at the very end is he willing to put all of his cards on the table for the league he loved so much.

Spinner doubles down of his friendship to shigaraki, but in the process lets all of his other relationships in the league falter in the hour when they matter the most, when everyone needs to stick together, and by doing so ultimately fails shigaraki as well by not reaching out to him as he's suffering.

Withouth twice and compress, Shigaraki in his most critical hour, when the question of wheter he or AFO will rule this new body, has nobody who has no reservations about reaching out to him to try to be his emotinal support, with all the rest of the league literarily just standing by listening/staring at this mental battle as he suffers.

In essence, all of the leagues problems and weaknesses could have been solved if they had actually been willing to talk to each other to understand their respective ideas and goals in life.

Instead, they did the opposite of what the members of 1-A and aizawa did, and let everything foster and grow until the rot destroyed all of them from the inside out.

[melaniepilled]

i know the fandom loves to pretend that xie lian doesn't take care of himself but let's really think about it for a second. he doesn't have a penny to his name, he has no luck, no spiritual powers and no friends and family left in the mortal realm. how exactly should he take care of himself?

he eats food off the floor because it's better than going hungry. that's how many people in poverty live. he doesn't think twice before touching something that might poison him because when you don't receive medical attention for centuries, you're naturally going to adopt an "it is what it is" mentality about your health. he probably didn't get treated by a healer the first few times he got corpse poisoning because he didn't have enough (or any) money to pay them with. he's humble and ignores however which way he's slandered because what can he do? he's heard things like that and worse before.

800 years of poverty will teach anyone humility as well as strip them of it. 800 years of poverty and solitude can make anyone into a complete cynic, an abuser and/or worse.

but xie lian didnt break, not permanently. what jun wu put him through is nothing compared to what the world put him through. tell me this: is jun wu truly the real villain of the story? or is he a micro manifestation of all the other systematic issues in the TGCF universe, wrapped up into a shiny, evil package that's easier to hate, easier to digest and easier to fall for?

know that even though jun wu "set up" the fall of xianle, it was corruption and imperialism that truly brought the kingdom to its knees. know that teen xie lian truly fought for his people, be they patriots or rebels, and that the reason his efforts could never come to fruition was the corruption of the royals and the nobles.

in a world as systematically corrupt as that (much like our own), how easy do you think it would have been for a poor, homeless and friendless man to live a happy, fulfilling life (which he never lived)? and how much easier would it have been for him to gradually give away his morals and principles in favour of a better meal for once, for a better bed for the night? considering his martial skills and vast knowledge of cultivation, would it not have been easy for him to take a path like jun wu himself? like xue yang, even?

and do you think that xie lian did *not* do all these things just because he had "self-sacrificial" tendencies? after centuries of being only a little better than a beggar, do you think the reason he wants to help the common people is because he feels Rich Prince Guilt?

don't you think that the act of preserving oneself here, the act of not sacrificing onself for a cause, is actually whenever xie lian decides to keep following the path of justice, his Third Path? does self preservation only count when it's your body you're preserving, or your material wealth, or your name? surely your own principles matter more. surely you mean more than a fancy title on a tyrant's mouth.

place yourself in xie lian's shoes, and answer this: if you were to go through all that, even if you were to not become a horrible person, would have found and maintained the courage, time and time again, to keep being kind, to keep taking care of yourself, to not become heedlessly reckless, to not become a walking corpse with a noose (ruoye) wrapped around your neck?

in my opinion, xie lian is a hell of a lot positive for a man who's been through so much and never heard a "it's okay, you can rest now" once (until hua cheng came along, at least).

do you think xie lian doesn't feel bitterness towards lang qianqiu, who buried him with a stake through his heart for gods know how many years, because he just... hates himself? or do you think it's because he helped raise lang qianqiu since childhood and earned real respect and admiration from him, after so many years of being spat on, cursed and ultimately turned invisible? do you think he begged to be banished once again only because he felt guilty (although yes, he did feel very guilty) for the terrible fate that befell lqq's family, or because he also genuinely cares about what happens to his people --- he protected the xianle remnants by setting himself up as a cold-hearted murderer, and he protected lqq by refusing to fight him.

do you think that being so old and having seen so much, xie Lian can't tell danger when it's looking him in the eye? he's not stupid. he doesn't neglect his safety until and unless it's to protect someone he cares about. e.g., when he tried his level best to protect shi qingxuan during the Blackwater arc, knowing that he's fighting things and people beyond his control. my point: it didn't matter if he failed. he had to try, just like he tried with his kingdom, and the kingdom that came next. sqx was the first person after hua cheng to befriend and defend him in a long time, and he wanted to show him the same courtesy. can this be reduced to "self-sacrificing" tendencies or "playing the hero", too?

when xie lian stepped out of that bridal sedan, he knew he was playing with fire, but he's not stupid. if he hadn't stepped out, who is to say that crimson rain sought flower wouldn't have entered on his own, or dragged him out forcefully? xie lian isn't a "you only live once, let's make bad decisions" person. xie lian is a "no matter how many lives i live, i will not change" person.

[lavaablast]

My headcanons pt1 (because i self project on everything)

(my opinion remember this is all silly fun) (also i change my mind contantly so expect me to edit this post constantly)

Kai Smith:

the band aid on his eyebrow is there because he has an eyebrow piercing, and he wants to protect it from getting ripped in battle (also doesnt want a scolding from Wu hehe)

self harms but instead of c///ing he burns because well, obvious reasons (less likely to be found out too)

orthorexic, is obsessed with being in peak physical form

hear me out on this one, i know he eats junkfood (so do orthorexics okay every 3d is diferent) anyway he never does it alone. he eats junkood only with other people, and he's always thinking he'll "make up for it" later. so yes he eats junkfood and yes he is orthorexic (felt like i had to defend my point there dsfsd)

body dysmorphia. knows he looks good but doesnt know what he looks like

"if i gave up on being pretty, i wouldn't know how to be alive" or wtv mitski said

has an extensive skincare routine but if anyone asks him he'll just say he "washes his face with cold water"

anger issues, but like he can explode on the ninja too and then he immediately regrets it but its too late which leaves him with... ->

guilt. ALL THE TIME. its in the back of his head wherever he goes

sun aries, moon sagittarius. i wont back down on this (im a sun aries and moon sag)

claims he "doesnt care" but actually cares so much it hurts (especially about Nya/Lloyd he'd do anything for them you hear me ANYTHING)

has strong morals and ideals but will give them up in a second when needed for survival of himself or the ninja (people often see this as a bad thing but he just wants everyone to live no matter the cost)

ironically, can't handle spicy food and is ALWAYS made fun of it by the others

is reckless and takes stupid risks because he does not care for his body whatsoever (the others think he doesnt know whats at stake, he does, but doesnt care when it's just his own saftey he's risking)

lowkey a perfectionist, but has a different idea of perfect than others so they wouldnt know (aka he needs things/himself/stuff he makes to be perfect, but not perfect objectively, perfect to what he thinks is right)

loves his parents because they tried their best, but still resents them. he hates that he does, but he does

cried all of his tears out ONCE after Nyas "death" and didnt cry at all after that, instead taking so much on his plate that he didnt get a single chance to think about it again (it'd be too painul, this was easier) which lead to....->

his grief being put on hold; and only when Nya already was back did it come out and he had no idea why he was feeling this way so he didnt tell anyone (what would he have said, im in agony for no reason at all?) and it was HELL to do it alone

tied to the above; he couldn't ask for help if his life depended on it (literally)

loves too hard

hates too hard

BPD coded (i dont wanna diagnose him but,,, im justsayinnn *whistles while walking away suspiciously*)

trust issues, but lowk all the ninja have them because like,,, just look at what they have to deal w bro

commitment issues because freedom is the most important thing in the world (after Nya/Lloyd) so settling down or commiting to one thing too long feels like threatining his freedom

actually smart (both emotinally and intelligently) but doesnt use his brains capabilities that much

great memory but also shit memory (remembers a whole row of numbers for no reason but forgets he has to pick up lloyd from the arcade..)

hot. thats all i rest my case

loves himself but hates himself

everything and nothing at the same time, everything about him contradicts himself, but also doesnt, but also does

hes a really simple person, really. but also the most complex one youll ever meet.

hates labels, especially being labeled by others (for the reasons above)

likes men but hates labels so,, no labels (not even the label "unlabeled")

infact he has a deep hatred for the label 'unlabeled' because if something is unlabeled, then why are you LABELING IT

red. everything is red redredred RED he loves red

has sibling bracelets with nya and lloyd (kai has green & dark blue, lloyd red & dark blue, nya red and green)

everything has to be red except the things that are black and orange. i rest my case once again

drinks just a bit too much for it to be considered concerning (started at 14)

will yell and scream at anyone who tries to help him (why do they think he needs help? why are they babying him? why cant the see he is capable?)

wouldnt let nya touch a bottle until she was 18 (be thankful nya its for the best)

paints his nails black or red.

has a strand of hair dyed red all the time

perfect teeth even tho he often forgets to brush them (how? fuck do i know)

would be a hyena i he was an animal

hates smartphones so he has a.. push-button phone?? whatever they're called. and he also only has the nokia brand. wont change it for a thing

"hates technology" but couldnt live without video games

loves to try new things but will have a breakdown if he HAS to try new things

stubborn asf, wont ever do anything he doesnt want to, which...->

makes people think he's selfish, but actually he's quite the opposite

selfless in an unconventional way, i'll make a drawing explaining it

please understand what i mean with that chart because it explains it so well in my brain

thats it for now cfdsfdr

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hey , how would Jeff the Killer, Slenderman, Ticci Toby and Eyeless Jack react to a Albino reader ?

Jeff the killer, Slenderman, Ticci Toby, and Eyeless jack w/ an albino!reader !

jeff and toby are the only two characters strictly written as platonic as per admins personal boundaries, but the others can be seen as either way YAHOO playing TLTs new fnaf song on loop while writing this its so mf good got my bones getting in a twist YIPEE did some research on albinism since i didnt want this to be the characters simply reacting to the surface level stuff so thats why it took a little longer to get to this ! hope thats okay!

SLENDERMAN:

sticking true to my personal headcanon that outside of feeding and running people out of his forest, he doesnt actually interact much with humans... asides from the additional torment he puts potential proxies through but hush hush thats a whole different can of worms. point is, i think its unlikely that he would meet someone with albinism. sure, hes probably seen albino animals now and then, but a person? new experience for him, but i dont think he would be treating you like a spectacle. puts two and two together not long after meeting you... though even if hes accepting of it, he doesnt know of the extra precautions you need to take (to protect your eyes and skin from the sun, for example) but hes pretty receptive i think... notices youre having a hard time on days where its sunnier out so he either keeps you inside or keeps you in the shade. doesnt like giving you things from victims, so hes going to find other means to get you what you need (sunscreen, hats, sunglasses, ect). generally very accommodating, has a soft spot for you. i mean of course he does, you managed to win over this ancient forest demon thing

EYELESS JACK:

already knows what it is, down to common traits and the different types since i personally hc that before he became this silly man eating demon he was studying in medicine + generally had an interest in this sort of thing. doesnt bat an eye to the way your eyes sometimes twitch or drift off, helps you to the best of his ability when the strain gives you headaches. very good at reminding you to reapply your sunscreen and to remember to wear a sunhat when you go outside. if he has to, hes going to give you his jacket just so you can protect your upper body long enough to get back to your place/// just please give it back when you see him again..

JEFF THE KILLER:

"has heard of it but like slenderman knows next to nothing about it asides from "oh it means you dont have pigment/have low pigmentation" has heard of it but like slenderman knows next to nothing about it asides from "oh it means you dont have pigment/have low pigmentation", but unlike slenderman hes kind of... an ass about it... like hes generally an arrogant asshole, so it may take a while for him to pick up on things to make things a little easier for you. seems like hes annoyed with helping you remember to pack your sunglasses and other necessities, or when giving you something to help with any headaches caused by any strain... but let it be known that if he truly didnt care he wouldnt even bother to pipe up and drag you out into the shade when the sun starts beating down on you two.. he simply shows his care for you differently, you know?

TICCI TOBY:

he gets it, he does. maybe this is because he relates to having to just. deal with stuff that makes you different from others. or because admin is on the fence of headcannoning toby with poliosis... which while not albinism, visually he can relate and also relate to some of the other symptoms of it (namely the eye issues). flip flops between reminding you to pack stuff you need and forgetting.. but when he does remember hes very pushy about it, so much so that you might need to tell him to tone it down. you guys tend to vent to one another about things since theres some relatability between the two of you. as mentioned in my previous post hes prooooooobalby going to steal things for you to help you feel better; from things that will physically help you to things that will emotionally help you

[lagsemantics]

Hi! Would you like to talk about your Soundwave Misfire rairpair? It's actually pretty cute ngl. How did they meet?

bahah thank you for asking!!

i've laready pestered @robot-rarepairs-dotcom about this in this specific ask but, yeah, why not yell it out loud and proud for the people in the back? and come to think of it maybe i should make a comic out of it sometime someday??? or a fanfic? no, i shant...

so. from the top. the war is still raging on all fronts. there is the fighting with blasters, guns, cannons ad whatnot, sure. but. its said that wars are won off the battlefield. and soundwave, as the chief intel officer is here to secure the rightful victory of the decepticons.

but its not an easy job by any means. there is infinite amount of information to be sourced and only so many tasks sw can attend to at a given moment. so knowing the right cybertronians and having mechs in the right places was all but crucial. and the neutral underground is one such place. but here comes an obstacle. neutrals dont take kindly to 'cons. it'd be a long and tedious process to plant a new network in there. it'd be so much easier if soundwave could find anyone who is already a regular in those spaces. and time is of the essence. there must be something, someone...

...and here comes the idea to employ the scavengers as contacts.

soundwave is naturally skeptical of the idea. the scavs? the bottom of the bottom of the barrel? undisciplined, lousy and, most probably, disloyal? but that just further proves the point. no one would put them under scrutiny. no one would pay them any mind, no one would care. they could slip in anywhere, anytime, get what soundwave needs and then disappear with no trace, since no one even payed them more than a passing glance and a dismissive scoff.

their questionable allegiance is another thing. the one thing soundwave is certain theyre loyal to is survival. he can grant them that. the decepticon high command has a lot of shanix to spare.

and its not like they need to get any major missions, either. soundwave could run a test trial to figure out whether this solution was at all worth investing into.

besides, the scavenegers (as most of the low-ranks) were expendable assets, after all.

and so the chief intelligence officer yields. soon after they send an anonymous signal to the w.a.p., requesting to meet their representative in some shithole bar on a neutral planet.

misfire lost the straw pull and was chosen to be the representative. which in practice meant he was the one speaking with the mysterious figure while the rest of the gang was to sit around (mostly) quietly and listen. and enage if the things went south. because, where one goes, the others do as well.

only when the mission renders sucessful, soundwave reveals himself - to shock and awe of the scavs. but, nevertheless, a long term symbiotic relationship formed. scavengers did what they were instructed to, to mixed results, but they did nontheless. soundwave paid accordingly. all was well.

but there is more to it than meets the eye.

soundwave, though he would never admit it, would grow fond of the scavengers - the lowkey, chill and maybe even fun life they had. a far cry from what he was forced to put up with in the high command. no more power struggle, no more persisting rumors of war. for a moment, aboard of the w.a.p. he could no longer be the head of the decepticon intel office. he could... just exist. not sure how he feels about it, yet. he needs more time to figure it out.

at the center of this is misfire, naturally. the one who talked to him first and the one who was sort of ushered into the role of the one to build a figurative scavengers-soundwave relationship bridge. naturally at first misfire and the others didnt take too kindly to soundwave. as a team they had rather complicated views on the high command as a whole. and soundwave was the very idea of the high command. as skeptical as the scavenger would be, the relationship was beneficial. soundwave became a token of survival for them. but soon enough though, that was to change.

i mean, misfire isnt stupid. he's introspective. he likes people. he likes knowing people. even soundwave was not beyond his curiosity. and, accidentaly or not, he got to know soundwave. the little things about him, that naturally started to seep out of his hardened shell now that he could, primus forbid, finally relax. soundwaves concealed passion for music, his innermost philosophical reflections, the way he cares about his casettes. the mask faltered.

soundwave is being taught how to be his own mech - who he is and who he has potential to be off the battlefield. he's been taught about the importance of trust as a part of loyalty and to overcome the egoism and dispassionateness which emerged as a part of desensitization that came about from everything he has experienced. misfire has been taught of bravery, the many ways to be strong and how important it is to fight for what he believes is right - to live for something beyond just the sake of living.

soundwave has also been converted into a gamer. he's become frighteningly skilled at whatever the cybertronian equivalent of mario kart is. but he lets misfire win :]

oh, and since then soundwave has brought along his casettes to one of his w.a.p. visitations. misfire is slowly but surely advancing to become "the cooler dad". soundwave is not sure how to feel about this.

[sodrippy]

one of these days i need the full story of your dnd mishap

😭😭😭 please

the short story is our party had three people (2 players + DM) who thought we were playing a fun friendly magical campaign and two people who wanted to recreate a critical role campaign amongst themselves...i think if youre familiar w cr you might immediately see the issue there.

long story is people put WAY way too much personal shit into their characters and almost immediately started taking the actions of characters as genuine irl slights and like. two sessions in had already lost sight of the difference between the pc and the player.

oh shit this got really long im sorry i dont think you care This much but i havent thought about it in a while and it bewilders me every time-

SO i was playing a cunty rogue and had TOLD everyone 'hey she is probably gonna clash w the party at first, but she'll warm up to everyone really fast, so dont worry about that' like it was clearly in the spirit of building a realistic character who had her own hangups etc. which i assumed the others would understand bc they'd done the same. plus is it not boring and unreal asf if a bunch of strangers meet after a murder of someone close to them and all just get along immediately w no suspicions or secrecy? cmon man.

and yet. the two cr-people got really weird about my pirate character stealing (???) and sincerely pulled the dm aside to express their concerns about the 'level of violence being enacted' and asked that we all try to be aware of what class of people we did crimes against. like. they wanted me to stop stealing from the 99% and ask everyone if they were rich before i picked their pocket ig. ALL THE WHILE. ONE OF THE OFFENDING PCS WAS IN THE MAFIA?????? LIKE. DIRECTLY EMBEDDED IN THE MAFIA THAT RAN THE TOWN.

i suppose that pc was off the hook bc he did possess the elf cock that the other guy wanted so bad, so. love won. i guess.

anyway they ended up taking hours out of our sessions to just dialogue-rp about slowly falling in love in a complex way or something. except then the non-elf player was like 'actually, dm, can you give me a love interest npc i need to add more depth to my character.' or smth, to which our dm lovingly crafted a beautiful working class hero of a guy. which the pc proceeded to hard reject. what was the point of any of this? we may never know<3

need to be clear as well this was all happening over discord bc we all live in different timezones, my very close friend was up at 2AM for this bullshit every week. AND he didnt even KNOW these other people very well, but suddenly theyre finding fault w not just his character but him as a PERSON? i just rmrd they accused him of like.....negatively influencing me??? like. MORALLY???? brother we have been friends for 10 years you are nothing to us you dont know us like that lol.

but they did REALLY really hate my character, which eventually made me feel like shit all the time bc like. obviously im putting work into her, its a creative construction and to have it railed against that badly is not fun. so i said ok you know what, ill just make a new character, hopefully thatll keep the peace and we can salvage this.

so i pitch a new character and oh they LOVE her. they fucking love her concept. which was so.........the first character was a lot easier for me to play bc she was a little more like me, and this character was specifically the opposite....how am i meant to take that reaction, yknow

which also reminds me: the original pirate rogue i played was a tiefling (yeah yeah gay stereotype i know. im not subtle or original, whatever) and there was a complaint (made only half-jokingly, ykwim) that she was too white.

shes not even HUMAN what the fuck do you mean shes too WHITE. IM not white that should imbue any character i create w an inherent not-whiteness. but even still, again, she is half sea creature. shes not. human. to be assigned a race like that....hello??

anyway so these two cr-rp players eventually blocked me and my friend on tumblr without saying anything, and got confused when we found out and said 'yeah ok we dont wanna play dnd with some guy who has blocked us on other social media' as if WE were the weirdos. like they saw no problem w continuing this disastrous campaign as long as they got their mandatory monologue time.

the worst part is my dm made SUCH a stunning campaign and world and it was so so so fun outside of this mess, i still feel really bad they never got to realise the world fully. plus my character had a sickass backstory thing where she was like. slowly unlocking latent magic the longer she spent underwater bc her demon parent was abyssal and stuff. which is whatever but the sick part is she was developing SCALES and maybe GILLS. in like a nasty gorey way it was gonna be so cool. but noooo lets talk about strange morality and your lameass god for 1.5 hrs. at 11pm on a friday.

[ndoandou]

Ikevamp bois playing modern games part 2

Vincent

Vincent is way into.. gartic phone

Qnd perhaps skribble.io

Like way into it

He would sit down 12 hours in front of the computer and guess what HES BEEN PLAYING GARTIC PHONE AND SKRIBBLE.IO IN A LOBBY OF RANDOMS

12 HRS IN HES STILL NOT DONE WITH BOTH GAMES

Hed obv speedrun a drawing in a short period of time and manage to make it look *chefs kiss*

Imagine if skribble.io had a vc feature tho

No no, like imagine if people were actually toxic in this goofy ahh game

They would yell down vincent down the mic telling him to go play with photoshop

Randoms are salty that vincent can draw and portray even the most ridicilous prompts which results him with the highest score always

Not to mention hes really good at guessing even the shittiest drawimgs from other ppl

"Broer how- that persons drawing looks ridicilous, even arthur's dog could draw that"

"Don't be mean theo! I could guess the drawing from the emotional connection i felt from it"

Jean

Jean has a shitty brick nokia phone

And he really loves playing snake II

No im serious

Well i suppose momte doesnt trust him with any other phones than that

the last time he was given a smartphone he downloaded some hack and slash game

took the word slash literally and then proceeded to cut the phone into two

comte was too stunned to speak

momte didn’t want his kids to miss out on gadgets but he cant have jean destroying his smartphone

BINGO! a nokia 3310 it is! 

jean didnt know how to react at first, but he found it easier to navigate and thats when he found out baout snake II

found it a bit pointless at first but despite saying that, he doesnt realize that thats the only thing he does besids fencing

snake II is his pre workout

the only thing he will be doing before his fencing practice

before meals

and before bed

‘‘jean are you sure you haven’t had enough of snake II..?’‘ comte asked causiously as he never know how his son Jean would react

jean looked at comte and stayed silent for a hot minute

‘‘no’‘

Napoleon

OK FLASH BACK TO MY E BOY NAPOLEON FANART FROM 2021

its official

He plays league of legends

Napoleon is deffo a jungle/top main

Jungle preferabbly

Bros actually cracked coz hed turn any non meta champs into an absolute beast

I see him being especially good with pantheon jungle

Hed play league with jean tbh

And jean would be a dedicated top

But i dont see jean being the best player..

No, like imagine napoleon defending jean from "top troll" and getting spammed "?" On his lane

Napo would literally go to that persons lane just to steal their minion last hits

If hes feeling extra hed even use pantheons ult to yeet over to that player to ks all the minions on that person's lane 😭

"Jgl troll gg"

Ok napo is actually not toxic and is rly nice to play with

Hed even supp for you if ur learning a new champ

Hes only toxic to people who are toxic to his buddies

Comte

Ill be honest

Comte looks like someone who would download all games from every ad pop up he gets

And im talking about anything gacha related

He does not care whether the game is explicit or not as long as he can collect pretty characters

Is he interested in the gameplay??? Probably not.

"For what reason did you spend $$$$$$ on xxx game???" Leonardo asked as he scrolled through comte's in game billings, cocking an eyebrow

"Hm? Well i simply wanted to collect all of these lovely looking characters."

"Without leveling up your characters?"

"Non"

"Do you understand how to play this game?"

Comte only looked at him with his unwavering smile

"honestly this is the most ridicilous spending ive witness from you, heh" Leo snorted

"Much appreciated, but i dont recal asking for any input, old friend" comte retorted

Leo looked at him and sighed

"Honestly at this point i shouldn't be surprised"

.

.

This took me forever to upload because i coulndn't figure what type of game comte would play then one day i was like AHAAAAA

Also i didn't proof read as always so pls dont chop my head off :"))

[kristiliqua]

im just thinking about wil’s stream today and how much it revealed abt q!wilbur’s character based off of his actions and behavior . help .

(TLDR at the end)

likeee . bro was so quick to draw conclusions , assume , and then put blame on others , despite have little to no information on literally anything abt the eggs’ disappearance . he was quick to blame everyone who was active on the server , saying that the eggs are still missing bc they “havent tried hard enough” and are just “doing nothing” , in terms of searching for them — all of which is untrue , but he says it as if its a fact anyway . even finding q!cellbit sus and not trusting him , despite knowing (again) little to nothing abt the guy , about his character and who he’s like as a person (that he cares a fuck ton abt the eggs and has been trying so hard to find any clues as to where they are) , the fact that he’s been gathering all the info he could ever since they disappeared (and before that , with other shit) . but he blames and finds him suspicious anyway .

he blames everyone else , when everything is and has been out of their control . they dont know much and Cant know much bc they know jack shit abt what could Actually be happening with the eggs . they only have theories and ideas

realistically , the thing q!wilbur should blame is ,, whoever or Whatever took the eggs away . but since he doesnt know wtf thatd be , its not as easy or assuring as it were to be if he blamed it on an actual Person or people he knows , instead of smth he doesnt know at all . its easier for his grief , to blame someone for the cause of it , to be angry and upset at someone . a physical person he can blame . and this irrational/illogical behavior is probably caused by the , yk . reasonably upset reaction that came with the bad news of his daughter being gone

plus the way he went to just ,, do it all by himself , despite the Very limited intel he had , saying that theyll never find the eggs if they just “follow the rules” (in his words) and all “do the same thing” . so he does it his own way , searching for any clues on anything , despite knowing practically nothing abt anything thats happened these past few months . even tho he knows that , logically , everyone else on the island probably has a bunch of info already , info that they could give him to help in his search (bc they all have the same goal in mind) . but instead he’s stubborn and doesnt want anybody else’s help , thinking theyre too incompetent and dont care enough abt the eggs — so he does it by himself , all up until someone reaches out to help him , rather than him asking for help himself (that someone being q!phil) . and in his attempts he ofc fails miserably , bc he Doesnt Know Anything . he has limited access to everything that could potentially be helpful (doesnt know where or what the order is and barely has any waypoints , only checking his and tallulah’s and the outside of phil’s house) , and so he’s basically working with fucking scraps . like itd literally be Impossible for him to find the eggs all by himself , he Needs the help from the others in order to make even a little bit of actual progress (so everyone thank q!phil for pulling up even after their little argument)

and logically (bc he isnt Stupid) , he probably Knows that . he knows that the others very likely care abt the eggs as much as he does (bc why would they all be gathering up for this mission thats For the eggs if they didnt .?) and have far more info than he could ever get by himself , bc he’s been gone for months and hasnt been caught up on anything of actual importance . but he was so upset and quick to blame everyone else (the mfs who could actually Help him and Know Shit) that he shut them off , going off by himself . esp after q!phil lashed out at him

anddd maybe there was a little spite or pettiness in there too , him wanting to prove that he can do it better than them , that he can get more than theyve ever gotten since they “didnt try hard enough” n all , and him finding shit out in a single day would be a huge testament to that idea . but ofc that didnt happen lmfao — he was practically playing a big guessing game with the info he had (or the lack thereof)

TLDR — i just find it interesting that q!wilbur was so quick to jump to conclusions and to push blame onto anyone and everyone he could , even tho he barely knows anyone on the island anymore . the way he went to take matters into his own hands , bc if theyre not gonna do anything abt it , then he will (,,, Not . bro was So lost)

just . what an interesting fella . what fun characterization . what a silly guy who is mourning the loss of his daughter (he is in denial)

[egtotaldramatakes]

im so happy i found this blog my td obsession is going to take over again !!! i have an insane amount of headcanons however most of them are about mike and his system because they are my childhood and current comfort character (also a very personal character to me because my mental issues)(this is going to be a long rant)

so heres a ton of mike n co headcanons while i plot how to rewrite all stars and draw it:

- mal is actually really into psychology, and tries to learn about it a lot. this is wht he knows so much about the system and how he could take over in all stars so easily (though in my eyes half of all stars was not real and i am going to demolish the writers with a wrecking ball) alsobmal is actually quite smart, however it is not portrayed well. he is about the same level as alejandro in terms of understanding others socially, maybe as observant as izzy, however he does not like showing that. he also usually does dumb things brcause he craves chaos to make him feel like he has control over his life (can you tell im self inserting(joke))

- the whole system collectively sucks with school subjects involving remembering very specific, one time use things (social studies, language) and formula based subjects are easier. however their grades are not great. also, they are all smart, but show it in different ways. svetlana is coordinated, mike is emotionally understanding/comforting person, mal is emotionally observant, manitoba is good with nature and animals, i can go on but i am not good at actually describing things like these in words !!! ask me if u want more explanation ig

- due to the above (grades), home life is not easy, and mike went to total drama to escape from life where he lived, though it was not the greatest idea. he met zoey though!

- mal is not really evil. he can be mean/rude as a defense mechanism, and prefers to do chaotic things for fun, and like i mentioned above to have a sense if control. he is very reactive / hotheaded and will get angry/emotional easily. he likes to see others hurt because he was hurt so many times and probably believes nobody would try to care for him, which is a large reason he tries to take over in all stars, since scott exists. he is destructive, and likes to show proof that he can be powerful, where mike tries his best to hide very strong emotions, and act happy as much as possible.

- mal thinks everybody loves mike, and has liw self esteem because of tje fact that he isnt mike. ("im a bug eyed weirdo and everybody loves me!") but mike thinks nobody could possibly like him. vito and svetlana usually have very high self esteem however, svetlana due to being good with athletics and probably for having medals for sports, and vito for being abke to talk confidently to others, which makes others act nicer. chester and manitoba do not really care about how others view them.

- svetlana being active (and mal fighting in juvie) probably gave them an ungodly sleeper build (how mal was able to mess up alejandro's wrist in all stars)

- mal didnt really want to go to juvie, probably only going for a big fight where he really hurt someone out of defense, but after seeing how much of a big deal it was and how people actually paid attention, he disobeyed people a lot more to get a negative reaction, since to him, "at least it is a reaction" or something like that

- i need to stop writing angst because i feel like i got hit by a truck but !! anywasy mal initially doesnt trust zoey and tries to sabotage her bond with mike, however zoey does research on trauma / rffects of trauma and kinda figures out that if she does nice things for mal, he will not be as destructive. it is slow and difficult but they eventually manage to bond as well as form a friendship

- mike has rarely had good food and when zoey takes him out to a fancy resturaunt for the first time he cries bevause the food is so good (they used to live in a house where groceries were forgotten and would sometimes fend for themself, and when dinner was cooked it wouldnt alwsys be something they liked, due to the different food preferences between each alter)

- mike, svetlana, and vito are dog people, manitoba, chester and mal are cat people , zoey got both and takes allergy medicine for the dog (mike insisted she didnt have to get a dog and this only made her want onr more(she always wanted a dog but never got one because of her allergies(she never considered she could take medicine since nobody close to her owned a dog)))

- the cats name is patches, she is a calico with one eye who mal found on the street, he initially tried to ignore her but couldnt leave her outside.

- the dog has short fur, not sure ehat breed, maybe a chocolate lab. has a name like hershey or some chocolate brand

- they go insane the first time they have a birthday and cry when the cake is brought out and zoey cries because she had birthdays but at home and with only her family

- sleep terrors.

- mal tried to give himself piercings several times but it failed since mike would find it and remove it and it the piercing would close up

i want to write more about the othet alters but they have so little screen time in comparison :( i also havent watched roti / all stars in like 2 months and my memort is really bad so i dont remember alot to base hcs on, also i zone out alot when they are on screen

my head is going fuzzy again and my neck and head hurts so i am now 🧭 anon !!! perhaps one day i will reveal my blog heheheh..... i hope these hcs are okay / dont get me hate and i will be back!!! i think ive typed for 45 minutes god

.

[meetthegofer]

🦀🦅💕😑💀 (esp interested in the last one considering game mechanics)

THANK YOU TORRANCE MY GOAT.. once again since this will be a little long its going under a readmore 🔥 thank you though this is a very fun selection

🦀- How did they handle realizing they were in love? Embarrassed? Nervous? Mad?

fossey was absolutely the more accepting of his feelings of the two in this regard; though they were definitely pretty nervous they tended to downplay it a lot, like "welllll... people get crushes on coworkers with all the time!! plus its not like anything's gonna come of it, so its fine for me to like him.. im sure ill get over it soon" <- that. generally just didnt register that they might have a chance At All and as a result didnt really catch themself reading too much into his words/actions because "well its not like he'd like me anyways! that would be wasting my time. i have a job to do, after all".

sniper on the other hand...

for him, the realization was like being hit in the face with a brick. not because he thought fossey was particularly undesirable in any way that would make him go "i cant believe i like THEM", but rather because he was still operating under the expectation of not really getting to know them or really form any relationship/attachment past just. general coworker amiability. it honestly made him panic a bit, because he wasnt sure if this would affect his performance in battle ["if i get hung up on something like that, itll be easier for me to get distracted and hurt more easily. or worse, ill underperform" <- that sorta thing] and again, he tries to consider himself as being somewhat divorced from feelings, at least on a professional level. of course, we know this to not be true [calls his parents regularly, shows genuine care to his teammates, etc etc] but well. hes stupid. <3.

🦅- How good are their friends at being wingmen? Do they even help at all or just sit back watching the pining with a bag of popcorn?

...you could not possibly have a worse ensemble of wingmen than the options laid out for these two. at the absolute least, fossey has the support of miss pauling, who reassures them about things when they feel down. however shes not really an active wingman? like she encourages fossey but doesnt ever actively try to vouch for fossey as a potential partner for sniper, mostly because fossey has asked her Not to [going back to the whole lack of perceived desirability they feel and all]. other than that, they havent really confided in their feelings to anyone else, mostly because they know theres literally no circumstance under which it would end without great humiliation.

sniper, on the other hand, tries to be discreet when asking for advice, but everyone kind of Knows who hes got his eyes set on. so when he tries to ask for help and is immediately met with a chorus of "ooooh so youre finally gonna ask out fossey?" hes like FUCK YOU and also how did you know [fake idgafer they saw you saying good morning!! when you dont do that for anyone else!!!!]. so i think he would get frustrated and then not ask for help again

that said i can definitely see a few of the mercs trying to take things into their own hands. scout makes stupid jokes to fossey about sniper ["yknow hes got a picture of ya in his camper, right?" "HE WANTS TO SHOOT ME?" "NO"], soldier probably tries giving him unsolicited advice that literally only worked because zhanna matches his freak so well, and medic breaks HIPAA in a strange way to try and bring them closer together. none of it ever works but theyre all quite content to watch the two of them very awkwardly dance around their feelings for one another and tease them about it [though mostly sniper. since fossey does a shockingly good job at hiding her side of things + they havent known her nearly as long]

💕- Who confessed first and how? Did it go as planned or did shenanigans ensue?

oh this ones fun. they both kinda confessed at different times, but the first one just... didnt work? going back to this question set, after fossey apologizes/confronts sniper about his avoidance, he Does confess his feelings, but does so in a more vague way that fossey absolutely Did Not Clock as romantic. unfortunately this ended with the most brutally unintentional friendzone known to man

its not as though All hope is lost, though. like i said, there were multiple "confessions", albeit fossey's was admittedly much more thought out in terms of like. the specifics.

see, they have a really bad habit of overworking [mostly because they lose track of time very easily, and their work is so repetitive its easy to get lost in the sauce. they arent a very intentional overachiever], and a lot of sleep problems. as such, it was bound to happen that they would one day fall asleep at their desk, having worked themself to exhaustion and not really noticing it until they'd woken up...

sniper notices fossey sleeping at their desk, hours after they were supposed to leave for the day [being a bit of an insomniac himself, he would sometimes just. walk around. everyone on the team is kind of a freak it makes sense to me. you know]. so he goes and wakes them up like "hey dude you were supposed to leave hours ago" and theyre like FUCK right ill be out of here in a second. however, before they can leave, sniper remembers that fossey usually Walks home. so he offers them a ride, because the idea of them walking home alone at like 2am greatly unsettles him. they agree, and since its only a 15/20 minute walk it ends up being a very short drive, spent in an admittedly comfortable silence between the two. maybe a longing glance or two is passed without the other noticing.

and just before fossey steps out of the van to go fuck off to their apartment building, without even thinking they lean over and give him a kiss on the cheek, then step out and wave goodbye like nothing happened. [its not until theyre actively closing the door to the apartment building behind them that they realize what theyve done. and by then theyre like FUCK]

sniper is obviously speechless, because just a couple months ago he got friendzoned and he was still wrestling with the fact that his feelings were only getting stronger with time. he just kind of sits there for a second before he realizes he probably looks crazy just sitting there in a van outside an apartment complex that is primarily home to like. old ladies. and on the drive back to his usual parking space for the camper hes just like Fuuuck work is gonna be so awkward tomorrow.

and the next day they do talk it out.. fossey stops by his camper and is like Heyyy so can we um 😅 talk about last night haha... and they give a verbal confession but end it with like "im not really expecting you to feel the same way but since you basically already know i figured id tell you..." and snipers just there like It is unbelievable how much i feel the same way. i imagine the conversation itself would be quite awkard/seemingly "anticlimactic" for the start of a relationship, sort of like [incoming maine moment] shimamitsu's first little stint as a couple in skip to loafer where they just very awkwardly are like "do you... wanna try going out?" after a rather embarrassingly sudden confession. but both of them are autistic and awkward so <3 love is love <3

😑- How easily do they get jealous and how do they handle it?

fossey is admittedly not very jealous at all LOL though this mostly comes from the fact that they dont place very high value in themself. so theyre like "? if he ever found someone else he'd just go for it man i dont think it'd be worthwhile to keep me around just to cheat". they also just arent really the possessive type, since they do actually trust him quite a bit in this regard and are very much of the "if you love something let it go" mindset. however in the context where i ship sniper with the other mercs theyre very chill with it. because fossey has the fujoshi spirit 👍

if they ever Would get jealous i think they would handle it well enough on their own, though. they tried exactly one [1] time to make a joke about sniper leaving for someone else and he was MORTIFIED so they were like Damn i probably shouldnt do that again that was a little mean.

sniper i think would probably be a little bit more jealous? it doesnt come up very much, but every once in a while someone gets just a liiittle too close or looks a liiittle too long and hes like ? You could back up a little bit!

he mostly keeps it to himself since fossey isn't and has never been the type to pursue or flirt with others even in a playful context, so when he Does get jealous its usually directed at the other party. i think early on he mightve gone to fossey about it first and when they got confused [because they didnt think the other person saw them that way + were absolutely NOT trying to go for them] he realized it didnt make much sense and didnt really bring it up like that again. not much reason to blame fossey for how others feel when they arent the one Inviting those feelings, yknow? at most he might be like "damn that guy would Not leave you alone" but even then it happens quite rarely, so its not something they really have to address more than like. once or twice a year. that said i Do think he might get a little more clingy without really noticing it... hugging a little more tightly or casually throwing an arm around their shoulders a little longer than usual.

💀- If the canon character is canonically dead, how did your OC handle their death? (Or did you completely omit their death cause fuck canon?)

this one is interesting, not just because of the game mechanics but also because of his canon [albeit temporary] comic death. when considering respawn compatibility + mechanics and the nature of the game, i think fossey is desensitized enough to how much violence occurs around these guys on a daily basis that the concept of sniper being hurt in this way doesnt really faze him any more than it does miss pauling or any other merc. like he knows he'll be back. its fine. though i do think in the back of his mind he sometimes worries that one day sniper might come back and not remember/not love/not care for him anymore, although this has yet to happen, and if scout's persistence with trying to court miss pauling is any proof, it likely never will.

his comic death, however, is a different story, primarily because it left him with some pretty permanent scars. fossey freaked out so fucking bad when they found out what happened [since they werent present for it] and they just like. almost couldnt really believe it? the desensitization to his death in the context of the gravel war + respawn machine and how it functions made them less cognizant of the idea that Hey he could still die for real one day. and that realization shook them pretty badly... if they were actually present for it i think they would genuinely be inconsolable for a while. but LUCKILY hes back 👍 insert i cant help myself "all clean!" image here

[starheirxero]

I've come to a realization, and decided, to ramble again! Fair warning, it might get a little out of focus? I have a lot to say, but I'm trying to make it understandable-

So:

Lunar is in the belief, that they are still on Eclipse's strings.

And the tragic truth is, they are right. Just not in the way they thought.

Looking back on Eclipse's death, knowing everything we do, Lunar, logically, was in control of the situation.

They have the powers, and Eclipse has nothing. Even though he thought, he might "rip the stars out", he was fully aware, that he was weak. He had to rely on the control he already held over Lunar's head.

And in a way, it worked.

The control Eclipse has is the reaction. Eclipse makes Lunar react.

It is something that I've noticed from the beginning, even before Lunar's death.

Eclipse bites, sinking sharp teeth into people's throats with his words. But Lunar and him aren't so different.

Because Lunar bites back.

Eclipse has the natural ability to make them aggressive. Everytime he wrongs them, everytime he bites and claws, Lunar will bite back. He has the ability to make them snap.

Lunar's reaction to Eclipse is to counter, to growl, to fight back. Something that they might have gotten from Eclipse himself, or maybe old Moon, and even Bloodmoon.

The only difference? Before, they would know their limit. Before, there was a limit. But now they have powers, now they have the ability to fight them physically, no longer held back. So they don't hold back.

On my first few watch throughs, Eclipse seemed to have complete control of the situation, even though, logically, it was Lunar.

But the reason is Lunar. We see it through their perspective. Lunar didn't feel in control, because Eclipse knew exactly which buttons to push. Making them feel smaller, calling them old names, making fun of them, making them feel unheard by checking his nails when they were talking. He made them react, made them use their powers.

Of course, it wasn't quite planned like this, but to be honest? I think Eclipse got exactly what he wanted.

Because he didn't seem upset, not even fearful! He was cackling and out of breath, sounding amused, maybe even delighted.

Maybe it's the realization that he's still in control. Maybe it's the realization, that Lunar still feels so strongly about him.

Or maybe he's finding satisfaction in knowing, that they are not so different after all. That he still managed to mold Lunar into an image similar to him.

And even though Lunar felt relief, they only spun themselves deeper into their puppet strings by doing so.

Because their teeth are dull. Eclipse's are sharp, because of how much Lunar truly cares. A part of the reason for their anger was the realization, that Eclipse didnt change.

He didn't feel remorse. He acted the exact same. Lunar, deep within, hoped for him to care, to love them, even if he never showed it. And their reunion proved them wrong, showed them that Eclipse truly doesn't care about them. To him, they have always been a tool, and they are even now.

They wanted their brother to love them. It's all they ever wanted, from the moment they gained consciousness.

And so their affection turns into a familiar anger. The anger, that tries to get a reaction out of him. Something to prove, that there is something more inside of him. They want to hurt him, just like how he hurt them.

But their teeth are dull. Because Eclipse doesn't care enough, doesn't value them. Their words leave him unaffected, for he doesn't care what they have to say, what pain he caused them.

So anger turns into rage, which turns into hatred, as that little spark of hope dies out, focusing on familiar rage instead. It is easier than the mess in their mind anyways.

Interestingly enough, this whole time, Earth is completely ignored. She's present, but neither of the brothers acknowledge her. Lunar is tunnel-visioning onto Eclipse, reinforcing once more, how much control he holds over them.

It is, in all senses, a tragedy.

-Stardust

NOOOOOOOOO OH MY GHOD STOP YOU'RE LITERALLY RIGHT FUCK EVERYTHING FOREVERRRRRR

HE WILL ALWAYS HAVE CONTROL OVER LUNAR AS LONG AS THEY LET THEIR RAGE ABOUT HIM CONSUME THEM WHOLE. THEY CANNOT PIERCE SKIN THAT DOES NOT CARE FOR THEIR BITE AAUAGAHGHGHHHH!!!!!!!!!