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thestorybrookeclocktower · 4 years ago

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I’ve been abused. This is the first time I admit it to myself.

I’ve been abused several times, psychologically, mostly, but also phisically and sexually. It’s hard to admit it. It’s been harder to realize it.

I was an abused child. Before I dig into it, I’d like to point out that I’m managing to do this only thanks to She-Ra, to Catra, in particular, to Adora, and to this video: https://youtu.be/arsKPegw1Tg . So thank you, Noelle Stevenson, and thank you, whoever made that video.

I’m frightened, right now. I’m scared as fuck. I think I don’t know myself, I think I never did. But I must go on, I must find out who I really am. I owe it to myself. I’ve been hiding for too long.

I was an abused child, and I have to write it down because my mind keeps escaping that. It’s hard to stay focused, and that never happens to me, I’m a writer, when I write I’m concentrated, focused, but now... now it seems like my brain’s floating away. And I can’t let it do it.

My parents divorced when I was two or three years old, I’m not sure about it. I clearly remember the day my father went away, the door slamming, my mom crying and myself trying to reassure her, telling her I was there, she had notHing to worry about. I was always way older than my age.

After that, I guess (my memories are a bit confused in the timeline), my grandmother (so I was told) convinced my father to build a wall during the night in the middle of our house to split it in two. I remember waking up and finding this rough, grey wall. My mom lied and told me there had been a earthquake and that the wall fell down. I didn’t know how a collapsed wall would look like, and believed her. My father left us without a kitchen. As I said, I was two or three years old. Thinking about it now, it hurts me to think of how hard it must have been for my mother to face all of this. My father used to beat her, when they were together. She told me that he broke her cranium, once. I cant remember it, I don’t even know if I ever witnessed when it happened. But still.

Later, my mother fell in love with the man who became my step-father. He was our neighbor, they worked together so they already knew each other.

My father disappeared for two years. I spent one year living with my grandparents in another city, because my mother worked and wasn’t home for days, so che couldn’t leave me alone all that time. I remember missing her, and nothing more.

Then, I remember growing up with my mother’s partner trying to be a father. He couldn’t. He was mean to me. His idea of education was based on yells and threats. He continuously told me that I wasn’t his daughter, that I was nothing, that I was worth nothing.

I also remember that I wanted to be hurt. I wanted to hurt myself and, in my fantasies, when I played alone in my room or in the garden, I imagined my “enemies” kidnapping me and me sacrificing to save my friends. That thing lasted. I would always want to sacrifice to save someone I cared about, but who didn’t care about me as much as I did. I still have to understand why. I just need some time, I guess. After all, I just found out I have wounds.

We moved. My father came back, at some point. He started sending the police at our new home, accusing my mother of child abuse, I guess, and trying to claim me as if I was some kind of property. I guess I started feeling like an object when I spent my weekends and summer or winter vacations with him. He had the right to spend time with me, I didn’t have the right to choose. I don’t think he never treated me bad, he was simply unable to be a good father. He just left me with his friends’ children to play. I had fun with them, anyway. I always insisted to be the victim in our playtime, though. Something bad would always happen to my character. I often played the villain (they were happy with it, none ever wanted to be the villain but me), but my villain always had a reason, a past, a complicated story that led them to the dark side.

I guess I was never really happy. There was always this shadow, this weight on my soul. I still can’t name it. I only know it’s there, but it’s lighter today. Maybe because I see it for the first time.

When I went to middle school, I was depressed. I kept saying “we’ll die anyway, what changes if I do or I don’t do this?”. I also developed a passion for swords and daggers. I always read a lot, especially fantasy books, so I guess it was just natural that I started loving blade weapons.

I also felt guilty for continuously feeling sad. I thought I didn’t really have a reason. My family had money, I went to holiday four times per year instead than just twice, everything I asked they would just buy it to me. But my stepfather would always rub it in. He made me feel like I owed him everything I had, because he was the one who paid the bills. He is an alcoholic. He freaks out every time he gets drunk, and he starts drinking at ten a.m.. He would walk naked at home. I was way too young to see a naked man when it happened the first time. He also spied on me when I was in my room, so I was always anxious that he was watching me and could never relax.

I wasn’t good at school, I only liked mathematics but was terrible at all the rest. I just couldn’t concentrate, and now I know that I had locked myself in my fantasies, in another world, where I was strong, powerful, where I was happy. No, no, sorry. I’m lying to myself again. It didn’t go this way, actually. I locked myself in another world, it’s true, but that world was horrible. I was becoming a teenager and I started watching Buffy, so I was pretty obsessed by vampires at the time, and also I was starting to realize what sexual desire is. The thing is, in my fantasy I was powerful, yes, I was strong, but I was always defeated. I would get captured by this beautiful vampire woman who would torture me to death and then turn me into something different, with magic. I would become her sexual slave. I fell in love with her, in my mind, and I would submit to her. It’s embarrassing to admit it, yeah, it sucks, it’s rape, torture and Stockholm syndrome. But that’s the truth. As I said, I wanted to be hurt.

Also, despite this I never admitted to myself I liked girls. I didn’t even consider it as a possibility, I told myself I was in love with Angel (surprise, with the bad guy trying to redeem himself! Who would have thought that?).

At the same time, my mom got a bad self-immune disease and lost her job. Also, in the same years, one of the teacher at school started targeting me. I was shy and insecure and she would take advantage of it and humiliate me in front of everyone. She seriously damaged me, my self-confidence (as if I had any), and my stepfather made it only worse. I got bad grades from her (even when I was prepared I was so anxious that I couldn’t speak when she questioned me) and he got angry and yelled at me that I was stupid, that I was unable to do anything, that I was an imbecile and that I was worth nothing. Once he threw a school book at me and broke my lip.

My mother tried to comfort me, but I always hid what I was feeling. I was really, really depressed. So much that one day I grabbed one of my collectible daggers and aimed it at my stomach, and I pushed. I wanted to die. I wanted it to end. And I wanted a slow, painful death.

But I stopped. I didn’t even get a scratch, not because I changed my mind, not because I couldn’t find the “bravery” to kill myself, but because I didn’t want to hurt my mom. I knew she would be devastated if I died, and that is the only reason why I didn’t push harder. She still doesn’t know about all of this.

I guess I made myself a promise, that day: I’d be stronger. And it was a mistake, because I locked the doors of my heart doing so.

Years passed by. I learned Kung-Fu, I made some friends, just a few, lost others, this is not the point. They didn’t abuse me.

I started dating guys. Older boys, usually, and I convinced myself I was in love with them. One touched me without asking my permission, and I didn’t stop him. I was so stupid... gah. I wanted people to like me so much that I pretended to be like them. I told them I liked music I didn’t like, stuff like that. Silly, silly young me. I was lost and I didn’t know it.

Other years, more boys. I’m pretty, and I know it, and I used it to flirt with basically any guy I found. Shame on me, I know. I only kissed them. After all, I wasn’t even attracted by them. I liked girls, even if I didn’t want to accept it. I was already different, I didn’t want to be even more isolated.

I also spent a lot of time online chatting and gaming. I used to play to this online role play game by chat, I had found the perfect, fake, fantasy world there. My first character was an elf with positive alignment. I stopped playing her because she bored me. My second character was a sociopathic girl, a sadistic villain. I still have that character, even though I don’t play her anymore. I made her torture and try to kill innocent people several times. She was my dark side. I used her to take out my darkest instincts. I’m ashamed of who I was, now. I became a bully for a couple of years, a dangerous person, a mean person. I hate myself for that.

I was in high school and I was a little more equilibrated when this guy I knew since first grade asked me out. I knew he liked me since then, so I thought I had power on him (because that’s why I flirted with guys, I liked the power I had on them). He took me on his minicar and we found ourself in an isolated parking lot. He was never a healthy person. He was unstable since he was a kid, but he had always been kind with me. He was kind and pleasing even that night. And manipulative. And abusive. He used my ever-present sense of guilt, he told me I had to because he took me in his car and drove for me and waited all of those years, and he insisted for maybe half an hour until I gave in (I couldn’t leave the car, we were in a dangerous block and far from home). I had my first and only oral sex experience with a boy. It disgusted me so I stopped after like three seconds, but he forced me to masturbate him, he phisically did pushing my hand on his d*ck. When he came, he also said I wasn’t good at it. He then offered to give back the favour, I refused and asked him to take me home. Two day later I texted him saying it was over. God, this was hard to write. My heart is pumping in my chest. I need some water.

By the way, I was eighteen then and I still hadn’t had sex yet, and I was the only one in my class and between my friends in general. About them, I lost them all along the way. They simply let me down, not repaying everything I did or gave to them in terms of affection, or treating me like shit when I came out, or just disappearing slowly. I have trust issues for this, it’s hard for me to open up to someone now, but I’m trying.

I found this boy at a party, at that point I felt nothing, I was just curious about sex. We started dating. I didn’t like him, I approached him just because I thought his ass looked good. Yeah, how romantic of me. But, as I said, I felt nothing. I didn’t care about him. He fell in love with me, even though I told him many rimes I didn’t love him. I felt nothing for him, or with him, even in bed. Sex was a delusion to me, and I treated him like shit. But still, he would stay. Poor guy.

During those years (yes, we spent four years together somehow), I finally realized I liked girls. Fate brought me to a convention, where I met the love of my life. I ended the relationship with the boy and started my new life with her.

She changed me, a lot. I was a mess when we met. I was rough, selfish, the bad girl I always wanted to be, unable to love, to have a healthy relationship, unable to find the strenght to be vulnerable. She was patient with that broken, confused me, and I’ll never thank her enough for this. I don’t deserve her. She always supports me and shows me how much she loves me everyday. I’m so grateful for her.

I learned to be humble, I learned to be vulnerable, selfless, a decent humang being. I learned to love. I learned to protect her, not (only) myself. I dismantled almost all of my walls. I don’t know if this one I’m tearing down right now is the last one. I do hope so. I’m so tired of those cold walls. Today, I don’t want all these swords and daggers. I don’t need them anymore.

I wish I was strong as Catra and Adora, strong enough to face myself and let myself be happy. Thank you, Noelle, really. I always believed in the power of stories, but I never thought an animated show could give me so much, that I could relate so much to someone (let alone the importance of their relationship on screen for the LGBTQ+ community, it’s a true revolution). I was attracted to Catra since the beginning, I completely fell in love with her during the fifth season, and now I understand the reasons behind it. I just feel her, deeply. And I also deeply admire Adora, her pure soul, her strenght, her bright heart.

Sorry for the long post, sorry if there are any mistakes, English is not my first language. Thank you again.

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purplesurveys · 4 years ago

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What were your favorite things to draw when you were a lil kid? I knew I wasn’t an artist the moment I started experimenting with pens and markers, and the only image I liked to keep - and was capable of - drawing on repeat was your usual kid’s portrait of a house with a sun and clouds lmao. I never learned how to draw anything else.

Do you think there is something with or around you, like a spirit, angel, ghost or something else? How does this make you feel? No, never.

Imagine you’re a stranger looking at yourself. What things would immediately catch your eye? Probably the way I’m scowling at stranger-me staring at me-me.

When did you feel the most confident in your life? Not sure when I’ve felt the most confident, but I typically feel so whenever I get something I’ve been desiring and working hard for, like getting a job offer or being accepted to my dream college or passing a really difficult exam.

Do you think love is needed to have good sex? For some people, no. For me, loving one another is an absolute must. < Yes, hits the nail on the head for me.

Do you think, or want to, die in the city you currently live in? I don’t think it would matter where I die, as long as it’s not from a terrible freak accident.

What is the strangest thing you have ever encountered? That time I went to Singapore and a sex toy shop was casually blatantly standing in the middle of Orchard Road for families to stroll pass. It’s not objectively strange, of course, but it was definitely a big culture shock. Putting up sex shops in the Philippines is basically a game of who can find the best spot to hide them in.

Favourite soft drink? I never drink soda, so I don’t have a favorite.

What do you like to put gravy on? Fried chicken or steak.

Have you ever gone canoeing/kayaking? Yes, in Palawan.

What is one thing you know about your family history you’re proud of? I come from a line of datus from both precolonial and colonial Philippines. The most exciting part about it is that it technically makes me a princess, or at least our local version of princesses haha. I’m also distantly related to one of the three women who sewed the first Philippine flag.

Who depends on you the most? Kimi and Cooper, surely.

Are you related to anyone famous or historical, if so who? See two questions above. Coming from my datu ancestors, my relatives also continue to serve in the local government of our family’s province until today. Not that I’m particularly proud of them or show this off whenever I want because they are all very vocal Duterte supporters and regularly engage with him and his family, so *barf*

Would you ever donate a kidney to anyone, and who? If it ever comes down to it, I’d offer one of mine to my dad, Angela, and either of her parents.

What is the main quality you think makes a great parent? They recognize when they’re wrong and know to acknowledge it and apologize.

What three things do you think of most of each day? Tasks I have to do for work for the day, tasks I have to do for the rest of the week, and financial concerns.

Does/did your high school have pop machines? No, of course not. Are there schools that are ok with selling soda? :/

Do you know anyone who’s won the lottery? Not that I know of, but then again these things are shared in secret so there’s always that chance of possibly knowing someone who won the lotto at some point.

Have you ever slept in a water bed? Never slept but I’ve played on one.

How often do you use Flickr? I haven’t visited that site since I was like 11. Not even sure it still exists.

Who is the last child that you took a photo with? I think my cousin Toffe, but it was most likely a family photo that the two of us happened to be in. I don’t have a lot of photos with my younger cousins and kids in general.

How often do you wear hats? Never. I always think about getting a bucket hat of my own but I just never go through with it.

Would you ever get a nature tattoo? I never even entertained the thought before. But considering Hayley’s albums and songs have like a million references to flowers, it sounds like a good idea now :)

Is anyone in your family sick at the moment? My paternal great-grandma was recently confined in a hospital but she’s been discharged. I have a grand-aunt who suffered a mild stroke a couple of weeks ago and is currently recovering.

Where do your siblings work, if anywhere? They are both still studying. If I had to guess, my sister would probably end up in the film, media, or advertising industry, if not a freelance artist.

Where is your favorite place to buy groceries? If I had the money for it I’d get my groceries at Marketplace, but I’m content with getting ours from SM or Robinsons for now.

Who do you generally talk to the most? Probably my immediate family and my team at work.

Is anyone saved in your phone under a nickname? Not anymore. I use nicknames on my friends more frequently on Facebook Messenger.

Whose birthday is coming up? One of my cousins’ birthday is on March 31.

Have you ever ordered from an informercial? No, never.

When, where, and why did a needle last pierce your skin? Around a month ago when I was embroidering. I usually accidentally prick myself from time to time.

Have you been to an escape room? Was it a success? Nah, not really my idea of fun. I’m a little weak at problem/riddle-solving :(

How many followers do you have on Instagram? I literally never use my Instagram except to lurk and look for influencers to potentially tap for work. The account was initially my one-photo-a-day-in-2020 dump, but I stopped in April last year and now we’re in 2021 it doesn’t even serve a purpose anymore lmao. But for some reason Bea asked for my account and still followed me (and is the only person following me), which I’m sure she already regrets.

What’s the most recent music video you watched? Thoughts? Continued the next day. Jessi’s What Type of X. Killed it as always.

Have you ever recorded a cover of a song? Never.

What makeup products are your go-tos? None.

Are you going to school this year? No, not anymore. I did that for the very last time in 2020, and I don’t see the point in going back for an MA because I feel like I’m already covered.

What is your favorite water activity? I’ve only ever tried kayaking, but that was a very pleasant memory.

What are your favorite video games? I’m not a super passionate video game fan who’s always up-to-date, but I do have a soft spot for games I bonded on with my family when I was a kid, like Grand Theft Auto (very inappropriate for a kid to be playing, I know lol), Silent Hill, Resident Evil, Mario Kart, and Smash Bros.

Do you like jello? I never got over the texture, so no.

When was the last time you gave someone "the finger?" Not sure when exactly but it happened recently, maybe a week or two ago. I suddenly thought about my ex and flung both fingers around just for myself lol.

Have you ever held a snake? Yes, I got the chance to hold and take a photo with one on my trip to Bali. I was the only willing one in the family.

Most unique place you’ve ever been to? Baker’s Hill in Palawan is what I would imagine seeing if I ever took drugs and had a trip of some sort. Most random place ever.

If you were a superhero, what color would your cape be? Continued from...I don’t even know anymore. Just know it’s been nearly a week since I first started this, lmao. Idk maybe gold.

Have you ever slept out on your porch all night? We don’t have a porch. We do have a rooftop and I’ve fallen asleep there a couple of times. I only do so when the climate is cold, though.

Do you like horror movies? Sure, but I haven’t watched any in years. Just have never been in the mood for it for a long while now.

What’s your favorite Coke product? Blech, I hate soda.

Watergun or water-balloon war? Water gun. I’ve never been hit by a water balloon but I imagine it hurts?? so I wouldn’t want to experience it if I never had to.

Do you know anyone that’s afraid of elevators? I know my sister and grandma are claustrophobic but they’re not ~deathly~ afraid of elevators.

Is there anything in your room that belongs to a boyfriend, or a friend of the opposite sex? I don’t think any of my guy friends have lent me stuff that I got to take home, so no.

Who’s your favorite Beatle? I was never a fan. I remember pretending to be, back when liking The Beatles made you look all cool and hippy and trendy... but I honest to god just couldn’t get into their music.

Have you ever texted an ex whilst drunk? How’d that go? Yeah just once, super super way back when I was still thought remaining friends with her was the way to go. It was fine, I didn’t message anything horrific and we were both chill about it the next morning.

Do you have to stand on your tip-toes to kiss your boyfriend? I don’t have a partner anymore but yeah, I used to. I think? Maybe? I barely remember anymore. I definitely did have to tilt my head up quite a bit, though.

Have you ever been tackle-hugged? I can’t remember if I’ve received one. I’m usually the one who gives them.

Have you ever rejected someone’s kiss before? I don’t think I’ve been in this situation before.

Is your mood or the overall tone of your day often affected by the dreams you had the night before? Just for like the first half hour of waking up, especially if it was a nightmare or a triggering dream. The more I wake up the more the dream fades away, and the sillier it feels that I was affected by it.

Do you think that there are any positive aspects or outcomes of suffering from a mental illness? If you have a mental illness, do you think it has changed you for the better in any way? No. Sugarcoating mental illness doesn’t sit well with me at all. I know I’ve learned to be gentle and understanding towards other people because of the emotional abuse I’ve received in my own relationships, and I absolutely hate that it’s because of mental illness. I shouldn’t have had to learn to be kind because I was treated shittily first.

What is your opinion on celebrity culture and celebrity worship? Have you ever been guilty of putting a celebrity on a pedestal? Do you think it’s somehow more acceptable/understandable to obsess over certain types of celebrities (musicians over YouTubers, say) than others? At what point do you think an obsession like that crosses the line? I sometimes think it’s silly when fandoms fight and defend their favorites as if they know them personally, but I’m heavily into my fair share of celebrities and I honestly don’t see anything wrong with it. As long as you’re not hurting anyone or doing anything stupid like stalking your favorites, you do you.

If you were to pursue a career in photography and had the opportunity and means to photograph whatever you wanted, what would most like to photograph? People.

Is there a certain type of clothing (outerwear, activewear, loungewear, etc.) that you enjoy shopping for more than others? Cute tops.

Are you ever afraid to post your ideas, artwork, photography, etc. online for fear that they will get stolen or not credited? No, because I am not even creative in the first place and can’t make any form of art to save my life.

When is the last time you did something sexual? Last night.

Who is the last person you showered with, if anyone? My ex but that would’ve been ages ago. It was super rare that we absolutely had to shower together.

What do you think when you see roadkill on the side of the road? Sad and kinda disgusted if the guts are out, but also relieved that they don’t have to suffer in pain anymore.

Have you ever had an ex that just didn’t understand that it was over? Yeah, me. Luckily I came to my senses a few months ago and have felt better and been better ever since.

Are your fingernails currently short or long? They’re unequal lengths because I’ve been either biting or picking at them over the last few weeks, but for the most part they are long enough to need to be clipped.

Would you rather have big or small dogs? Big.

What is your favorite sports drink? I don’t drink any of them, so none.

What was the last compliment you gave a guy? I told my dad the dinner he made tasted excellent.

Does your jaw ever crack, pop, or lock? I don’t think my jaw has ever made a sound before, hahaha.

Have you ever thought of how you would give your kids “the talk”? No, but I think it’s also relevant to note that I live in a very conservative country where sexual intercourse is never discussed, especially within families; and that it’s virtually unheard of to hear of people until my generation to have been given the talk. I had to find out all by myself, and I remember being very confused when we were being taught the reproductive system in fifth grade because they only taught about the organs and their functions, and never anything deeper than that.

Luckily the last conservative generation was Gen X, and younger generations have been a lot more open-minded. And if I had to guess, I’m fairly certain Millennial parents would be more willing to give their kids the talk.

Do you ever feel like you’re missing out on something? I mean, my 20s, thanks to Covid.

Do you ever write/draw on windows that are fogged up? Yes.

If you were married, and your spouse’s parents became ill, would you let them move into your home? Of course.

Have you screamed in a pillow before? Probably.

What do you like more, acoustic or electric? Electric.

Did you actually have a cookie jar? No.

What’s worse, having someone mad or disappointed in you? Disappointment is more gut-wrenching. I feel more hopeless and helpless when someone feels that way about me.

What do you bite on more, your tongue, lip, or nails? Definitely my nails. Lip-biting isn’t a habit of mine and I only ever bite my tongue accidentally.

Do you think that knowing when and how you’re going to die would ruin your life? No. I would find that comforting, actually.

Do you have a favorite bromance? From TV or a movie. J-Man and Channy’s from Friends.

Do you find flea markets and thrift stores enjoyable? Sure.

What color is your wallet? Pink, but I def have to buy a new one soon as I’m still using the one my ex gave me...

Have you ever been somebody's photography subject? No, and I would hate to be. I don’t like being in front of the camera.

Nicki Minaj fan? I like a lot of songs by her but I’m by no means a fan.

Have you ever seen the Niagara Falls? Nope but I would love to.

#survey #surveys

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c-bulletaftermidnight · 6 years ago

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Ok I said I wouldn’t ask but your TFA answer was so awesome I’m curious - things you liked/disliked about TLJ?

Oh boy, oh boy

Liked:

_ Uuuh. Kylo becoming Supreme Leader and cementing himself as the true villain I guess since it’s interesting to work on it’s gonna the political & military landscape of the FO??

_ Kylo being shown off again as a good tactician when fucking up the Raddus.

_I’m glad Phasma’s gone.

-Finn & Rey hugging at the end of the movie that’s it.

That’s it.

Dislikes:

_ The worldbuilding has been fucked up just to respond to Rian’s whims when he have barely any explications about the context.

_ Fucking bad designs everywhere.

_Boring cinematography except a few times.

_ The fucking zooms-in and Kylo looking like he’s stuck in a washing machines when he barrels rolls around the TIE Silencer.

_ The FO is suddendly overpowered with money and personnal. The loss of SKB has like no impact on the organization. This episode should have explored to their backstory but Rian simply didn’t care.

_ Everybody in this movie shut off their brains.

_ Hux went from “officer didn’t had not much battle experience” to a total joke. His traumas due to his upbringing are ignored and his sufferings are reduced into supposed moments of comedy .And it’s not like Rian didn’t knows his past, he even gave him a first name. Hell he didn’ even bother explain Hux’s past to Domhnall and he discovered that his character had a first name when an interviewer asked him about it (Domnhall seemed pretty angry about it since he invest himself a lot in reserches and stuff for the characters he plays.) Knowing how Domhnall had to improvise the blaster scene, i’m sure he would have objected even more of Rian’s decisions. His purpose half of the movie is to do Huxposition on the bridge, being totally incompetent and thrown around. It’s gonna be hard for JJ to repair this and have the audience take him seriously as a villain.

_ Poe, well, I never cared much about his character. I even tried to read the comics but I felt barely nothing about him. But I was hoping TLJ would help but instead they managed to makes me hate his character. The Poe/Holdo arc was badly written. There was many ways to make an arc like that make sense but also more emotionnal for these two characters. I hate how one second they makes him this macho man who keeps understimating lady officers but a second after, the female characters are “haha, I like him ;)” Yeah sure.

_Finn’s arc who is reduced as total coward and a joke and where war has to be explained to him (a fucking child-soldier) by a woman that constantly think about hurting him when he mentions Rey, the person he is close to the most and then is forced as a potential love-interest to him for some reasons. The DJ explanations are just bad (of course, the Resistance has to buy weapons. We knows that Rian, thx) The suicide run was also pretty stupid. Also the fact that him and Rey didn’t reuniting on the Supremacy screams so much Rian wanting them to interact as less as possible in the movie. Finn deserves better.

_ Rey’s arc. Can we even talk about an arc? Her character regressed. As if she didn’t dealt with years of abuse and survival on Jakku and as if Kylo never tortured her and hurt her closed ones. Hell she even get tortured twice in the space of two days because of Kylo. The Force-skype stuff feels so forced. Adam & Daisy only have good chemistry when their characters are set against each other. Rey talks about how she is scared of the Force within her but we see her then has no problem to deal with it and master everything in one second (rendering the existence of jedi school pretty useless like you just have to download the Force-powers of a master jedi and that’s it. The Force.exe is installed. ) The small training scene where she cut the rock looks pretty stupid, her sword fighting position is pretty bad during it. Going to the dark side has no consequences on her. She has no agency. Replace the word “Force” by the plot and you’ll see what I mean.

_ Luke. Has someone who has to deal with depression, I think showing Luke as irritated and stuff can makes sense. I kinda relate since my temper changed a lot. I had a lot of patience & kindness but now, everything irritate me (from a member of my family intruding in my space to hearing the ringing of the phone) I’m scared to see my friends, I feel like a walking failure that I will never be satisfied about myself or will satisfy my parents, I just want to be left alone & if this lead me to die that way, then so be it. The problem is how wonky the writing leading-up to this Luke is bad. Everything is about to make us feels sad for Kylo (I don’t). Kylo’s turning against his family upon learning that he is the grandson of one of the most dangerous war criminal would makes senses. Luke blaming himself because he felt he failed to help his nephew after years of work instead of randomly popping his lightsaber would have made more sense. Luke’s grieving all his others students would make more sense. Luke attempting to reason Kylo after the massacre but still failing would make sense. Luke looking for a solution on the island and then failing to find one, thus made him feel unable to see his sister face to face would makes more sense. There’s is barely any emotionnal moments for Luke and the Final holographic showdown feels like they absolutely wanted to avoid Kylo to kill Luke directly (like c’mon, he’s been committing war crimes since the first minutes of TFA)

_ Kylo. TLJ is a bad attempt at Kylo’s pity fest.It’s interesting that his traumas are acknowledged while the other character’s are pretty ignored despite having a tragic’s past that should impact them as well. Everything is about him. Most of his actions are pretty villainous, he’s no grey character like people are trying to force us to believe because he looks sad. This is an humanized villain arc (which he didn’t need after seeing TFA), not a redemption one. At least he is now the main villain too, so there’s tha (But the “Uwu save ben solo” stuff going around spoil my liking of him as a villain. I’m not here to see whether Kylo is gonna turn LS for a third time in ep9. It would be too repetitive at this point) I just hate the “ You are truely Han solo’s son”line because it is obvious he is more like his mother. Only father figures are important to the characters in SW, it seems. Also the goddamn scar being moved on his eyes but it doesn’t impair his vision despite being cut by a freaking lightsaber. Like Rian could have gave us a legit explanation why Kylo was weakened & needed Rey to fight the preoatarians guards: Losing an eye would be an huge handicap tha het is not used to yet so he needed help to take the throne.

_ Leïa is only here to looks sad and for Kylo’s momentarily manpain (and Marry Poppying around space). Like really, you reduce Leïa fucking Organa too that?? The woman ready to move time and space just for the sake of saving freedom? the princess of Alderaan who saw her planet being destroyed but kept up on? the woman who was mainly in charge of the strategizing of Hoth’s evacuation? The woman who was willing to stay on Bespin just for the sake of massacring stormtroopers because Vader gave Han away to Boba Fett & would have stayed if Lando didn’t pulled her off to the Falcon? The woman who had to face the galactic backlash of her being Vader’s daughter but still kept on? A woman full of anger but also sense of duty?

_ Rose, rose, rose… I was excited to meet her so imagine my disappointment upon discovering she was just here to lecture & push around Finn & being forced as another love interest that doesn’t even work. It’s like she forgot that her sister died the same day and that she should still be grieving. We don’t even get to see her use her mechanic’s skills in the whole story. The message about her character makes no sense between her last line in tlj and all the destructions she is willing to provoke (not all the ppl working at Canto bight are rich, has it show in the Canto Bight book) or let happens. KMT doesn’t deserve that.

_ Yoda’s appearing bcos I hate this hypocrite of a gremlin and was expecting for Luke to dunk him in the sea.

_ Chewie, the glorified cab driver.

_ The battles are a huge clusterfuck & the most badly written space battle I have ever seen.

_The way Poe’s piloting skills feels to OP when you compare to other pilots, in particular in recently RO.

_D’qar’s battle is a fucking tactical mess. Everyone has been conviniently dumb down. Same during the slow-mo chase. What’s even the point of bringing the whole fleet of star destroyers if they are just useless.

_ Bad infiltration scene on the Supremacy on the same level as RO’s one. I’m just tired of infiltration scenes in SW. Please stop that shit.

_ The preotarian guard fight is a choregraphic mess that has no stakes for the characters. Everyone is just waiting for their cue and twirling around. It’s like it was shooted in one go. And there is a difference between Luke in ROTJ kicking a blaster out of the hand of a foe looking bad due to technical problems of the time. And a knife suddendly being edited out at the last minute because the mc would have die then

_ Crait. A good example on how not taking in account the worldbuilding that could be used in battle. So you’re gonna tell me that the Resistance decided to hide away in a base with no issue other than big metallic door in the front? Sounds like a good plan.

_ Leïa never taking command of the battle and strategizing and letting Poe deal with all that despite that she is the general that Poe is a demoted member of the Navy who caused a shit-ton of mess among the Resistance like 30 minutes ago

_ Hux is still depicted in a idiotic way & using bad tactics again. If this is supposed to be a movie about the characters learning about their mistakes,well it didn’t do its job.

_ What is even the use of the third cannon of the gorrilla walkers??

_ What was even the point to use these old speeders besides for being destroyed?

_ Rey shooting down 3 TIES in one shot seems to break a lot of SW physics. Her disappearing of the whole fight shows how much Rian didn’t care abt her character beyond having her interact with Kylo.

_ Y’know, I have Battlefront 2 and in the game there is mining tunnels on the battlefield that you can use to hide. In the movie they are not present, the whole Resistance sit dumbly in trench and just wait to be massacred. I was hoping those tunnels would re-appear in the movies & would be used to sink the walkers by bringing them down with bomb used for mining but nope. The image of walkers falling in a sinkhole, provoking a storm of red dust, coloring the outfits,armors and vehicles in red would have been pretty badass to see.

_ The ramming canon trained on like 10 kilometers instead of using the gorrilla walkers designs and adding to them the mini death-stars canons. They can’t use it all the time tho bcos it would need to cool down before shooting again. Aren’t these supposed to be artillery vehicles ffs???

_ The Resistance not even rigging their escape ships with bombs so if the FO penetrated their base, they can at least cripple them by exploding them. So much for a group that is supposed to be specialized in guerrilla warfare.

_ Talking about guerrilla warfare, i was expecting at least a pursuit and firefight in the mines. No use of the worldbuilding during battle scenarios once again.

_ Leïa should have been the one to confront Kylo, not Luke. Showing her willing to fight her own son and dies during it for the freedom of the galaxy would have been a good way to send her off and building her as this strong, resilient, legendary leader willing to fight her own family for the good cause. It would have been a good middle finger to people who slandered her upon learning she was Vader’s daughter.

_ Rey effortlessly levitating these rocks. Showing her struggle would have made the ending scene more rewarding.

_ The news of the Battle of Crait spreading super fast despite that the Resistance official journalist, Suralinda Javos wasn’t even present during it for documenting or something.

_ Broom boy & the way it is implied that he might join the Resistance or something because of his Force-powers. A fucking child.Involved in a war. I thought Finn being a child-soldier was bad thing?

And I’ll stop there for now, because there is so many problems with this movie, i’m never gonna be finished with it.

#tlj criticism #rian there's no point abt subverting expactations if you can't write coherent characters and plot

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goodnightallwhites · 4 years ago

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Midtown High's Newest Snowbunnies By BlackingPacking

Midtown High's Newest Snowbunnies

By BlackingPacking

Submitted: July 10, 2020 Updated: July 10, 2020

Mary Jane Watson and Gwen Stacy want to buy some weed for the first time. They end up joining the ever-growing ranks of thotty teen snowbunny party freaks. A bit of subversion of expectations

Provided by Hentai Foundry.

Chapter 1 - Aaron Davis, Part one 2

1 - Aaron Davis, Part one

Gwen Stacy and Mary Jane Watson were, among other things, very different types of rebellious.

Gwen was edgier, tomboyish, borderline violent with how her sense of humor was. The tomboy aspect was helped by her disappointingly small bust. She couldn’t even reach a C cup.

Mary Jane, on the other hand, was quirkier, more nerdy, would more likely win an argument with a teacher than just annoy one. And her bust was a spot she excelled at. Or two spots.

Both, though, did plenty of similar things, even together. Sex was one of their favorites, with plenty of steamy lesbian moments, with sloppy wet kissing, pussy licking, and ass eating shared between the two of them. Not to mention complaining about Peter Parker’s tiny little peter. One of their favorite memories was when MJ was on her last break with Peter when they both went to a party in the sluttiest clothes they wore. MJ knew Peter would be there, and wore a leather corset and dyed her hair black just to freak him out. She and Gwen had some damn good phone sex after that. They spent hours on the phone almost every night, without either’s family knowing, having the kinkiest phone sex their FBI agents could imagine. This being before they’d graduated to full on hot lesbian fucking.

Something they’ve only done once, however, was smoke a joint. Gwen got it from a party, hid it from her father, and let Mary Jane share in enjoying the small amount of actual mary jane. They’d enjoyed it, but that was weeks ago. They wanted more.

And what better way, thought MJ, than getting it herself? That’d show Gwen for always saying she was the cooler one.

She wouldn’t even go to the school’s dealer, Hobie Brown. They needed a guy who could get them whatever they wanted- weed, high nick vapes, fake IDs, whatever. She’d get the good stuff from the guy who every kid in midtown was told to stay away from on their walk home, the guy Hobie wanted to be.

Aaron Davis, garbed in a purple t-shirt under his leather jacket, smoked a vape in an alleyway. Nothing illegal, and he never got high on his own supply. He never even kept his product in the same place day to day. It was how he made himself the biggest dealer left in Midtown. He was smart, far smarter than most. And he wasn’t even 25 yet. The guy was going places.

As for Mary Jane, she liked his confidence already. He stood there with swagger, looking more impressive than 90% of the students at Midtown, easily. He was a few inches taller than her, and almost half a foot taller than Gwen, but carried himself like he was far, far above them. They liked that.

Best of all, they’d heard rumors that Aaron accepted sex as a payment. And sex was Gwen and MJ’s favorite thing.

It certainly helped that he was black. Everyone knew what that meant, of course, and it’d be a welcome

change after only having sex with all 3 inches of Peter Parker.

MJ had a whole pervy little plan concocted. She had managed to arrange a meeting with Aaron through Hobie, set at 2:55, right after school let out. Gwen was told, though, that she should meet behind the apartment flats the students were all told to stay away from at 3:30. MJ had her stuff ready during last period, and nobody cared that she brought her backpack to class.

Nobody but Peter, of course.

“Hey, MJ,” he asked after the 2:50 bell rung.

“What is it, Peter?” she asked, annoyed after spending a full 45 minutes horny beyond belief. It was a struggle for the redhead not to finger her pussy through her jeans.

“Ah, nothing MJ. You just looked uncomfortable all class- plus you had your backpack today. In a hurry for something?” He acted so fucking cocky. As much as MJ told herself that she was a size queen who only deserved the biggest, hottest cocks, she had to admit that Peter was cute. He had that whole ‘hot nerd’ thing he was growing into since he lost the glasses, got a whole lot fitter, and had a confidence boost. She actually got wetter. She hoped the over-observant bastard didn’t notice how the wet spot in her panties felt like it was soaking into her jeans.

“Yeah- I’m, uh, not feeling great now Peter. I’ll talk later if I can though!” She walked faster.

“Oh. Alright. I’ll, uh, call you?” He called, stopping as she sped off.

“Don’t bother!” she yelled.

By 2:55, she was at the location. Her tight maroon and white t-shirt showed off her round tits perfectly, and her jeans showed off her ass like nothing else she owned. They were bell-bottoms, something that hadn’t been in style for 40 years, but she knew the curviness made her butt pop just that much more.

And then, there he was. The purple garbed tall black man, standing behind the old apartments across the street. They were home to single mothers and school kids, none of whom would be home now. MJ wondered how many he had fucked.

She knew the stereotypes of course. White man, small dick, but black man? Big dick. She new her mom had joked to May Parker about how MJ’s abusive asshole of a dad was just insecure about his ugly little pecker. She’d even heard him say the N word a few times. How the hell a beauty queen like MJ came from a guy who, from what she heard, had hairy little marbles for balls was a mystery to her.

But Aaron Davis? Not only would he not have to be too impressive to dwarf Peter and Mr. Watson, but he still looked like he’d be impressive against anyone. He looked good without trying too hard, he could model if he didn’t have such rough features, especially under that tight t-shirt.

The definition of big dick energy. And that didn’t even count the bulge in his jeans.

“Hey there,” MJ breathed, looking around the corner to see no one followed her. Her heart felt like it

was in her throat. She was gonna fuck thi 20-something year old dude. She didn’t know how or where or in which of her eager teen holes, but she know she would.”

“Yo- MJ, right?”

She nodded, “do you- have the stuff?”

“The stuff?” He cracked up, “yeah kid, I do. But how do you know you’re not a cop?”

MJ stopped. “A-a cop?”

“Yeah. Ya gotta admit it’s fishy. High school bitch, askin for weed when she coulda just gone to my boy Hobie? What are you, little girl, freshman, sophomore? 14 or 15? I’m down to get some head, but not to do anything illegal. Well, that kinda illegal.” He chuckled.

“I’m a senior, thank you! A-and look, here’s me student ID,” she flashes her wallet, showing the card and her under-21 drivers liscense. “That's enough?”

He chuckled again. “Yeah bitch, it’s good. But, I saw you got some good money in that wallet. You ain’t just gonna by my shit like a normal thottie?”

“I’m,” she walked up to him. Shakily she laid her fingers on his chest, “thottier than most, you might say.”

“Oh? You’re lookin nervous babe. Ever done this?” He lifted his fat bulge.

“I-I-I’m not a virgin! I know what to do.”

“But you’ve never sucked off a nigga in an back alley, have ya?”

A back alley? He wanted it here?!

The dirtiest she’d ever done was blow Flash Thompson in his bathroom while his girlfriend was outside. And even then, Flash Thompson, while better than most at 6 or 7 inches, definitely did not compare to the thing that stretched Aaron’s pants. “N-no...” she admitted.

“It’s ok girl,” he hummed. She looked up at him. Those tight round tits of hers nearly brushed against his chest, “I’ll show you the ropes.”

Suddenly, with a thud, she felt a large object slap against her stomach. She looked down and saw it- a long, fat cock.

“You can squat down right? Show me how low you can go.”

She obeyed with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. With her ass out lots more than it needed to be, she squatted down to take his cock in her mouth. It was bigger than her face, with a thick width and thick foreskin and a nice, fat head. It’d be hard to take down.

“Eat my ass, Peter,” she whispered as she held this big beautiful dick.

“‘Scuse me?” He asked.

“Oh,” MJ looked up. She was drooling. “Peters my, well, Gwen, the girl who’s coming later, Uh, our ex. He’s about this big.” She pinches her fingers together.

Aaron just burst out laughing, “Ah, don’t make me laugh!” Despite the obvious.

“It’s true!” she laughed too though. This big cock stared her right in the face. A real man’s cock. What the fuck was Peter gonna do about it, huh? Mary Jane had some reservations before, but as she opened her mouth all wide and breathy and nasty, she realized just how right it felt to suck on a cock this big. That’s what was really important. That a guy’s cock was big. It was a size game, and only the biggest, fattest, pants-tearingest cocks deserved to win. If Aaron took this cock away, MJ would probably curl up on the ground and cry.

Aaron rolled his eyes, “Whatever, bitch. Just keep goin with that jb-bj.”

“JB?” asked MJ as she popped her jaw each way to get ready to suck off that dick.

“Jailbait.” he whispered as she slid her tonguey mouth right down his veiny cock, “And whoo damn is it worth it”

“Mmmmgh!” said MJ happily as he started fucking his throat. Of course she was worth it- she was this close to a modelling contract, after all. She never wanted to be an airhead or some haughty bitch, but goddamn if that didn’t seem fun. Maybe if she’d joined the cheerleading squad she’d get black dick like this more often. Sally Avril probably got her ass raw dogged to nirvana. Cummed in too.

With Peter, MJ had been used to counting the seconds until he came. With Aaron, it was minutes. But just minutes. He wasn’t going at it subtly, roughly fucking the back of her throat so she drooled and spat over his hairy crotch and thick, muscled legs. He didn’t care about her pleasure, but not because he didn’t know how. Just because he didn’t want to. She was, along with being a customer who was probably being way overcharged, a cumdump to him. But little else. And he made it work, dammit.

He shot thick cum into her stomach. She’d heard it called ‘baby batter’ before, but now she understood this. As his balls tightened up and his truly manly cock got even veinier, she could feel how much batter-like man milk he was dumping in her. She could barely close her mouth with it all in, after he stopped.

Baby batter. In the back of her mind, she was thankful he didn’t just shoot that up her pussy or she’d have some serious explaining to do.

On the other hand, she really wanted to get fucked. Fucked hard. Fucked right in the pussy by this cocky, misogynistic, drug dealing black thug. With his big fucking cock. Because fuck what she needed, she’d be getting what she wanted.

“Mmm-mmmmm!” she said, biting her lip as she sat down on the filthy alley ground, legs spread, and started shaking. She kept moaning like that until her jeans were totally soaked. She’d cum from barely even touching him. Barely even being touched.

“You bitches are weird, you know that?”

“I- I’m sorry, but I don’t care,” MJ stood up and began stripping, “Wanna fuck?”

“Ah shit, girl- right here?”

“M-hmm. C’mon, I’m so fucking horny,” she just threw her underwear down with her clothes.

“Didn’t you just cum?”

“Yeah- and I said I was fucking horny!” MJ’s mind told her to stop, that rawdogging this dude in this alley was a horrible choice, no matter how big he was or how wet she had gotten, but those voices quieted as she orgasmed. They’d probably go away with the next. “So, how do you want it? Face to face, or me bent over?”

“Shit, you white bitches are all the same,” he said as he licked his lips. Aaron surely had no second thoughts.

But it seemed not all those voices came from inside her head.

No, one came from a thotty blonde genius who liked knives a little too much, who was walking right up to them.

“MJ- what the fuck?”

Oh shit- Gwen!

#bbc #story #interracial

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strawbebehmod · 7 years ago

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Royven au

Based on a convo I had with @bloodyalphonse

So ok, you know that hawk riza au I’ve been doing stuff for where riza is just a hawk but no one realizes this? Well what about an au where Roy is actually just a Raven Berthold taught how to make fire. Like, not even fire alchemy, just straight up light a match. And the thing is, he’s still just a bird, so he flies around like a maniac setting things on fire, including himself. After Berthold dies Riza is kinda forced to take care of his pet and to make sure he doesn’t kill anyone or himself on accident. She and like three other people are the only ones that realize he’s just a fucking bird and not a person. The others being pinako, maes, and Olivier, who is still extremely confused and furious as to how a bird is her rival for furher. Seriously. He’s not even trying to become furher. He’s a bird. Just picture it: –He doesn’t even apply for the military. They just show up to riza’s door one day and are just like, “We want your bird.” –Riza responds, “WHY?!?!?!?!” –she ends up going with him because he’s still her bird and she doesn’t want people to kill him –Maes steals the kishe from riza this time –roy steals his glasses and hides them as a result because corvids hold nasty grudges –still ends up liking hughes after enough treats –He’s still made a state alchemist even though all he can do is light matches –some how still becomes the hero of ishval despite accidentally setting himself on fire ten times while there –”how the hell is my bird a higher rank than me” –Still is sent with riza to go recruit the elric brothers –When riza shows up and finds out what happened, she just wants to leave quietly and not report them. – the Roy decides to fly around the room with “his” pocket watch, smack into something, and sit in Ed’s lap and caw at him for a few minutes before Riza can grab him and leave –this somehow inspires ed to become a state alchemist and a year later he comes to take the test claiming that Roy told him to become one –”HOW????” Is Riza’s response. –pretty much everyone is able to understand what he’s saying except her it seems –he rides around on Riza’s shoulder –and black hayate –keeps trying to bring her food when she’s sick –Ravens can learn how to speak a little, so he learns how to say everyone’s names –he calls ed pipsqueak –Likes nuzzeling Riza –Imagine sad Roy at Maes’ funeral just sitting on the head stone. –He suddenly says “it’s raining” Riza never taught him to say that. He insists that it’s raining despite her saying otherwise. –When framing maria ross Riza has to be very careful with roy –”Roy this is very important” she tells him, holding his face to look directly at her, “You cannot set maria on fire. Only the dummy, got it?” “CAW” “*sobs* why did I think this was good idea” –He ends up playing with the bracelet around the fake maria’s wrist at the crime scene –Bird Roy managing to kill lust completely on accident –also healing havoc completely on accident –Riza is in complete denial that day even happened –imagine the scene with bradley cornering Roy and separating him from his subordinates –Roy isn’t listening to his back story at all, he’s flying around the room, playing with shiny objects, and trying to drink the fuhrer’s tea –”Mustang you are being very childish about this” is all he has to say. –Riza begs to stay by his side. Mostly because she is 100% certain he will burn down central completely on accident. –Bradley gives him a new handler instead –Roy does not like this handler and proceeds to steal one of his fingers –Ed applauds him for this –Ravens can learn how to pick locks and use tools –he sometimes takes riza’s money and buys random things with it –one time he bought a whole flower cart –Riza: HOW MUCH MONEY WAS THIS Roy: Caw! *starts placing each individual flower on her shoulder Riza: *sighs in exasperation* what am I going to do with you –The homunculi still plan to use him as one of their sacrifices –Riza tries to explain to them multiple times that he’s a bird and can’t actually do alchemy –they do not believe him and force him to open the gate anyway –On his door is just a match stick –when he comes out of the gate, he is blind like before, but now he can actually transmute and speak in full sentences –This freaks riza out when he asks if she’s ok –”The fuck did they do to my bird?!” –Riza is pissed and kills father herself as a result –no one fucks with her pets and gets away with it –Roy somehow manages to become fuhrer one day –Riza is not sure how this happened as she nor he never announced his candidacy, and she actively told people not to put him in office –Olivier is ready to murder someone over this –He he still some how has a fruitful reign as fuhrer, establishing peace between nations and helping to get the ishvalan people back to their now rebuilt home land –Riza is still pretty sure this is all one big joke on her and everyone was in on it all along –once, someone glued a fake mustache to his face –he liked it. Alot. Riza, not so much. –it was three weeks before it fell off on its own –One day riza gets him a duckling to let him take care of –he names it maes –He takes good care of it, but freaks out when he tries to swim because baby ravens can’t swim –Riza has to help him chill by petting him and such whenever he sees the little guy swimming around –He tries to teach maes how to speak. that does not work. –he successfully teaches him how to light things on fire though. –At the ripe old age of 58, Royven passes away the way of Alex the parrot, his last words being “you be good. see you tomorrow. I love you.” –Riza never gets another bird after that. –Even though Olivier hated him, She respected Riza. After he’s gone she admits to her “he was good bird.”

And there you go. I made it sad. Hoped you liked this au!

#roy mustang #riza hawkeye #fullmetal alchemist brotherhood #fma au #fmab #strawbebehfic #royven

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assbuttyourlife · 7 years ago

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When We Were Young - Chapter Fifteen

Pairing : Misha/OFC

Warnings : Language, Fire, trauma, PTSD, family members’ death (including child), therapy, flashbacks (not in every chapter), injuries, cheating. Long fic. Angst, fluff, Smut. Mention of suicide.

Words : 4895

Summary : After her grandmother’s funeral, Lily must return to the place she lived in when she was young and has to confront the ghosts of her past. She will run into an old friend that she thought was lost forever.

WWWY Masterlist

AO3 link

CHAPTER 15 - SKIN TO SKIN

After they entered the hotel room, still without a word, Lily fell down on her bed, feeling exhausted. It wasn't late, but all those emotions drained her, and she still felt extremely guilty to see Misha so upset. The atmosphere in the room was heavy and cold, but Misha broke the silence with his low voice.

"I'll be back soon." She looked up to see him leave the room, probably to go get something to eat. She Just hated everything about herself right now... But she had to do it... right? She didn't even know exactly how she really felt about him. They were in love when they were young, that's for sure, but now? Everything had changed. Nothing could be the same anymore, and obviously he didn't want to face it.

She did what she always did when she wasn't feeling good: Call Katie. She just hoped she wasn't too busy rehearsing.

"Heyyy! what's up Lily-bee?" She picked up right away and just hearing her high and raspy voice made Lily feel better. "Hey Kat! You seem good! Where are you?" "In the cafeteria at work, with David who says hi! Are you with Misha?" "Not right now, he uuh... He went to get some food."

Even through the phone, she couldn't fool Katie who immediately heard something was wrong.

"Is everything okay? You sound weird." "Yeah don't worry, we just kinda had what you could call a... disagreement?" "Again? Let me guess: He doesn't want you to sell the estates." Lily cleared her throat. “He actually doesn't. You're good!”

That happened yesterday, but she actually were glad that she had an excuse not to talk about what really happened. At that moment, she thought about something else that changed between her and Misha: they were fighting a lot more. Of course they had fights too when they were teens, but it was rare, and pretty much everytime about something really stupid. But now, they seem to disagree about everything, and it just proved how much they've changed and nothing could be the same.

“Ah ah, I knew it! He's a sentimental and he keeps tearing up when he talks about his childhood, I knew he would try to make you change your mind about selling. Did he actually succeed?” “No, he didn't. I will definitely sell whether he likes it or not. It's not his decision. It won't be easy for me either, but I have to.” “Lily... Do you realize how much money those properties must be worth?”

Katie had a point... The Litchfield mansion was huge and well preserved even if it needed to be freshen up a little, and the farm was even bigger and still workable despite the half burnt residence that should be fixed. “Probably a few... millions...” Lily pointed out.

Money had never been a problem for her, as far as she could remember, her grandfather and father did such a great job with the farm that they had more than enough and they were privileged enough to help other people, but hearing herself saying “millions” was kind of a shock for her anyway, so she just decided to laugh about it for now.

“I'll buy you a boat.” She chuckled. Katie scoffed. “God... I won't even start to tell you how much you'll be able to do with that kind of money, I guess you already know.” “Yeah, don't bother. So... Can we please change the subject for something... lighter?” She was beginning to feel really uncomfortable and that was not why she called Katie in the first place, she needed to be cheered up.

“Alright, alright. Hey umm... Have you checked Twitter since the convention?” Okay... Twitter was definitely a lighter subject, but she had a very bad feeling when she heard the tone in Katie's voice. “No. Should I?” “You know, you should uuh... you should probably change it and make it more... private.” “Why? What's going on?” “Well... you know how Supernatural fans are about girls and everything...”

Couldn't she be more specific? No, she didn't know anything about those stuffs! “Just... Trust me and change it okay? You don't need to waste your time reading everything. It's worthless.” “Thank you! Now I'm freaking out! I'll check it later.” “I need to go, Lily. David's eyes are getting scary, he's been waiting for me long enough. Call me if you need to talk alright? Love ya!” “Wait! What-” Great... she hung up.

Since Misha was still out, she opened the Twitter app on her phone and checked her timeline. It didn't look that bad, some people wanted to know if it was really her they saw at the convention, some others sent her nice tweets saying they were happy Misha found her back, that they were cute together on stage, that they wanted more stories, and then some... oh...

Some people thought she was lying about her identity just to be close to the cast, she saw someone tweeting that she was just Vicki's girlfriend, but Misha wanted to hide it so he made this old friend/girlfriend story up, others simply sent insults thinking she pretended to be his friend just for his money or fame... and she also saw a tweet saying she just wanted to end his marriage because she was jealous. They sure had a lot of imagination!

Their words were very hurtful though... Attention whore... freak... gold digger...jealous bitch...

She jumped when she heard the lock on the door clicking. Misha walked inside the room, put the food on the table and saw her standing in front of the window like a statue, her phone in her hand and a very annoyed look on her face. “Wow, relax. I took something for you too!”

She opened her mouth like she wanted to say something, but no sound got out. She just stayed here with her mouth open, breathing heavily.

“Lily? Don't be so dramatic, I'll get over it. I'm sorry if I reacted so-” She raised her phone and slid her finger on the screen to show him all those tweets about her. He wasn't even surprised.

“Oh... Yeah I could've warned you that could eventually happen.” She felt a wave of wrath growing inside of her. “That's all you have to say???”

He threw the phone down on her bed. “Well, it's unfortunate, but it's part of my life. Some people are just really, really stupid and do that for... I don't even know what for to be honest. I just don't pay attention to them. I'd rather focus on the positive aspect of this fandom to do good things.”

Unbelievable... He talked about it like it was the most normal thing in the world. Was she overreacting? Was she just a drama queen or something?

“Oh, so I am just supposed to shut up and let people insult me in public?” “Well, first you're supposed to make your Twitter more secure, but yeah, just ignore them. Don't let them get to you. You have no idea how many horrors I've read about me, and even about my family, kids included.”

She sat back on her bed and rubbed her face, sighing deeply in defeat. “That a lot of crap for a couple of days.” Misha frowned. “Hey! I don't want you to feel bad about our trip here!”

She stared at him with wide eyes. “Look at us, Misha! We can't stop fighting! We disagree on everything, this is ridiculous! And now this? This whole thing is a complete disaster!”

He sat on his bed, facing her, a bit disappointed she felt that way. “I don't think it is.” “See? Again, we disagree!”

His face fell at her hurtful sarcastic tone and his voice started to raise. “Don't ruin this for me! I enjoy being here with you!” “Naturally, it's my fault again. It was a fucking bad idea in the first place and you know it! We have nothing to do here anymore, among ashes and ghosts of the past! We're not the same persons anymore, we have nothing in common, just face it Misha, and then you'll be able to move on like I did!” She almost screamed.

She sighed heavily, got up of the bed and went to the bathroom, not bothering closing the door behind her as she was just getting her stuff back to put them on her suitcase.

“What are you doing?” Misha followed her. “I'm going back home, where I belong. We've wasted enough time. I should be rehearsing for next weekend's concert and you should be with your family while you're free.” She spat harshly. “Oh, so this is your solution to every problem in your life, uh? Running away? Just like you ran to Europe? That's the only thing you can do? Very brave, Lily!” They were both screaming at each other now, Misha following her every move, ready to jump if she tried to escape.

She opened the dresser and picked her clothes, throwing them angrily in her suitcase without even folding them properly. “Shut up! Don't pretend you know me! You don't! You did, but it's over. It's fucking over, Misha, do you understand that?” Her voice was shaky as she started crying, not because she was sad, but because she was full of rage, trying to make him understand that all of this was useless. She had a hard time closing her suitcase, as it was a big mess inside and she was shaking from anger.

“Do what you want here, take whatever you want, I don't even care. I'll call the agency to sell the houses next week, so you better hurry.” She put her suitcase down and started walking toward the door, taking her jacket and phone on her way. Misha followed her, feeling everything around him crumbling.

“Lily, stop!! Wait!!” He ran to the door so he could reach it before her and stood on the way so she couldn't get out. “Get out of my way!” He didn't move. His jaw clenched and his nostrils flared as he stared at her angrily. “Make me.” His voice was dangerously calm and low now.

In her rage, Lily threw her jacket in his face but he caught it. “Get... the fuck... OUT... OF MY SIGHT!” She yelled, catching every object she could put her hand on and throwing them at him between her words.

Tired of her little scene, Misha stepped forward and caught her right wrist so she would stop throwing things at him. She gasped. “Let me go!” He caught her other wrist, roughly pulled her towards him, spun around and pinned both of her wrists above her head against the front door. She struggled, panting, so he stepped closer to press her whole body between him and the door to keep her from moving and hurt herself.

“You fucking bastard! Get the fuck away from me! Let me go, damn it!!” She screamed, feeling trapped. He got even closer and looked down at her, his face only a few inches from hers, her wrists still pinned above her head. “I can't...” He whispered between clenched teeth. She panted and tried to struggle even more, but he was definitely stronger so she could only writhe a little under his weight, driving him crazy.

He leaned closer and crashed his lips on hers, sucking on them before biting her lower lip, which startled her so she made a strangled noise. He took both of her wrists in his right hand as he needed the left one to grip firmly on her chin and tilted it up so she would look at him in the eyes.

“I just can't let you go, don't you understand that?” He growled before roughly kissing her once more, this time pushing his tongue inside of her mouth.

She was still panting and writhing between him and the door, but she kissed him back, biting his lower lip too. Misha slid his leg between hers and raised his knee up a little so his thigh was now pushing up right between hers, and she completely lost it when she felt the pressure between her legs. Her eyes shut down and her legs almost gave up so he had to let go of her wrists to support her, but he didn't stop. He grabbed her chin once more and tilted her head up.

“Look at me.” She heard the dominance in his voice and felt the wetness between her thighs spreading, as he laid his hand on her hips and slid it under her shirt, now biting on her neck. She gave in, unable to resist him any longer, raising her arms so he could take her shirt off completely, and she went wild when he licked on her neck, right on the spot that he knew made her weak, soon sliding his tongue lower to her chest. She moaned loudly and grinded against his thigh while she touched him everywhere, finally free from his grip. She almost ripped his shirt open, eager to feel the warmth of his skin against her chest after so long.

She couldn't stop touching him, his large shoulders, his firm chest, then she reached further and scratched his back until her hand finally reach his jean's bandwaist, and she plunged under his boxer to squeeze his ass. He groaned and reached for her jeans too, unzipping them quickly. He pulled his leg back from between hers and she whined at the loss. He stopped kissing her and stared hungrily in her eyes while he pulled her jeans down roughly. She helped him by stepping on it and freeing her legs. She was now only in her underwear and this vision made Misha even more eager. He pressed his body to hers and cupped her ass, raising her from the ground, and she instinctively locked her legs around his waist, her head falling back against the door in a thud when she felt his rock hard erection through his jeans. She gripped on his shoulders when he kissed her once more. The kiss was wet and full of tongues, they were just devouring each other. She rolled her hips against his jeans and they both whined at the sensation.

Misha turned around with her still hooked around him, walked to his bed and threw her on it before pulling his pants off while she was laying on her back biting her lower lip. He climbed on the bed, put his hands on her knees and spread her legs before laying down on top of her and leaving open wet kisses on her neck. He reached behind her back to unclasp her bra and she arched to help him. She let out a long and obscene moan when he closed his mouth around her right nipple and sucked hard. She scratched his back one more time and shoved her hand between their bodies, gripping his hard clothed cock to stroke it.

“Ahh!” He grunted and threw his face in the crook of her neck, biting harder, kneading one of her breast in his hand. She pulled down on his boxer, unable to wait any longer. He knelt back on the bed between her thighs to help her, and she licked and bit her lower lip, humming when she saw his thick cock finally free. Of course, Misha did the same and quickly pulled her black panties down too, before observing her body with darkening eyes. His hands caressed up her legs and he bent down to kiss her on the lips. He laid down on top of her and when he felt their naked bodies fully connected, as she wrapped her arms tight around his chest and her legs around his waist, his cock rubbing on her lower stomach, his mood changed, and he kissed her slower and slower, deeper and deeper, realizing he was making love to the woman he missed so much.

He could've kissed her like that forever. It was worth a million words, and he put everything he felt for her in that kiss, sucking on her soft and luscious lower lip, tasting her over and over again. He held her face in his hands and broke the kiss to stare into her green gaze. She stared back at him with shiny eyes and smiled, sliding her hands down to his lower back. She pushed a little and felt the tip of his cock on her now soaking entrance, which caused her head to fall back and her mouth to open without making a sound.

Misha sucked on her neck one more time while thrusting his hips further and entered her slowly until he was fully inside of her, causing her to dig her fingers on his back and moan. He didn't move. He just stopped everything to look at her and appreciate the exquisite feeling of her around him.

“I missed you so damn much.” He whispered. Her eyes reddened and she ran her fingers through his hair. She gently pushed his head down and kissed him slowly. “I missed you too.” She replied softly against his lips. Misha wiped a tear that fell from her eyes with his thumb and stroked her hair back. He gently pressed his lips to hers again and started to thrust slowly. They both stopped kissing to moan in each others mouth, as good as it felt for both of them despite the torturous slow pace of his hips. They stayed with their mouths open, breathing each other's air, while Misha sped up his pace a little and thrust harder, needing more. She moaned at every move.

“Oh... Misha... fuck!” The sounds she made were driving him crazy, so he sped up even more, knowing he wouldn't last long after twenty two years of missing her perfect body. She grabbed his hair with a hand, wrapping her other arm around his chest. The feeling of him inside of her was pure ecstasy. She forgot how good he felt, how thick he was, how perfectly their bodies matched. She whined and swayed her hips under him, her breasts rubbing against his chest. He could feel her hard nipples against him, her arms shaking around his neck, her warm stomach under his, her legs hooked around his waist, her walls twitching around his cock, and the feeling was almost unbearable.

“Come with me.” He purred in her ear and thrust his hips frantically, sucking her neck one more time. “Oohhh god... Misha... Oh fuck... yeah!” She bit her lower lip hard and held onto him even tighter, squeezing her eyes shut.

“Open your eyes, Lily...” He wanted to sink into her gaze while she came, he needed her to see him loving her. The feeling of him thrusting fast and hard inside of her while she was wrapped around his warm and firm body was so unbelievably good that she just wanted to close her eyes to melt in the sensation, but she fought to keep them open and look into his piercing eyes, now almost black from lust, with a hint of blue sparkling emotion.

They both dissolved into pleasure at the same time, staring at each other and screaming each other's names. She felt her walls clenching around his hard cock as his pace became unsteady and he came inside of her, and her eyes rolled back as she cried out his name one more time. He grunted and thrust a few more time, guiding her through her orgasm, and when her moans got lower, he collapsed on top of her, laying his head on her chest to catch his breath. She didn't roll to move him away from her. She needed to melt under his weight and warmth just like she used to do when they were young.

Misha had always been a cuddler, he liked to stay and lay on top of her to cuddle after sex, and apparently it didn't change. He pulled up a little, supported by his elbows on each side of her face, and he looked at her for a while without saying anything.

She opened her eyes and saw him staring at her with awe.

"What?” She whispered. A tender smile slowly grew on his face. “This is no PTSD... This is not because we're here... This is not nostalgia or any other crap. I love you, Lily, and I mean it. I know you're scared, but I'm not. Something... or someone, took us apart for twenty two years while we could've been happy together, and I'm done wasting time.”

She shook her head, closed her eyes and clenched her jaw. “Oh Misha...” she caressed his cheek and traveled to his hair. God how she loved his soft hair!

“The only thing I'm asking you right now, is to not regret this. We'll figure the rest later. Can you do that?”

Her right hand traveled softly from his shoulder to his lower back as she sank into his gaze. She knew she would regret this the second she would be away from him. She would feel terribly guilty and she would probably never be able to look at Vicki in the eyes, but right now... she was happy and complete... She felt like she was sixteen again, and she only wanted to keep him forever.

“I don't know.” She replied honestly.

And this was the exact time Vicki chose to call her husband... Misha's phone rang on the nightstand so he picked up, moving away from Lily in the process, and she sighed, feeling empty again. “Hey Vic, what's up?” Misha answered casually.

Of course, Lily's brain started to work... too much. She was currently naked in the bed of a married man and a father, who was also naked, talking to his wife on the phone right after they had unprotected sex... Nice one, Lily! And she was supposed to not regret it and not think she was a reckless slut after that? She just did what Peter did to her a few weeks ago, except it was even worse for her because she was destroying a whole family... Oh god if Rebecca knew about that... She would hate her for devastating her family. And if her mom could see her right now, she would be so ashamed of her own daughter!

She felt terrible, unable to keep listening to him being all cute while West took the phone because he was missing his daddy, so she got up, picked clean clothes in her super messy suitcase, and went to clean up in the bathroom, avoiding looking at herself in the mirror. He was still on the phone, naked in his bed, when she got out, fresh and dressed.

“I don't know yet, we'll probably go to see our old school or something.” She heard him say to Vicki. He looked at her and winked. She went to check her phone on the armchair near the window.

“I gotta go, Vic. Kiss Maison for me. I'll call when she wakes up.” He hung up and went to the bathroom to clean up too. While she waited for him, Lily tried to eat a bit of the chicken salad Misha brought earlier, but all she could hear were the words whore and home wrecker, resonating again and again in her mind, so she gave up eating, feeling nauseous.

When he got out of the bathroom all dressed and ready to go, she observed him, and something bothered her.

“You look like you don't feel an ounce of guilt...” It startled him so he leaned on the table right next to her. “That was fast... I thought you'd reject your guilt a little longer.” She sighed and closed her eyes. “You just fucked another woman and talked to your wife and kid right after and you act like this is totally normal when it's definitely not.”

He crossed his arms. How could he be so insouciant? “That's how you see it?” “That's exactly what it was, Misha! How blind are you?” “I just made love to the woman I was supposed to marry but lost tragically twenty years ago. We are lucky enough to have a second chance, Lily... I won't let that slip away from me without fighting. I tried to stop missing you, to stop loving you, to stop wanting you, but I can't, you hear me? I can't lose you twice.”

Damn it! He knew perfectly how to make her feel like jelly!

“I don't feel guilty because I know what I'm doing. I know Vicki, I'll talk to her. Then I'll figure something out depending on her reaction.” “Depending on her reaction??? She will fly to Seattle with her crying kids who lost their daddy, and she'll get to me and slit my throat while I sleep and expose my head to the world! And she will be RIGHT about it!"

He didn't want to, but he slammed his hand on his mouth and laughed uncontrollably. “Are you fucking laughing? Is this funny to you?” “Your reaction kinda is, yeah! Do you hear yourself? You should avoid anticipating reactions of people you don't know. I'm pretty sure I know what Vicki will do or say, and I can only tell you you're far from the truth.” "No. You will shut up about it and preserve what you have. She doesn't have to know does she?" "Yes, she has to know, first because we are honest with each other about everything, and then because it will happen again."

As appealing and exciting as it sounded in his mouth, she couldn't imagine herself being that kind of woman. "No, Misha. It won't happen again. Consider this a... I don't know... a closure fuck."

He grabbed her arm and forced her to stand facing him. He was still leaning on the table, so he spread his legs and pulled her towards him, then took her chin in his hand and kissed her. Oh god that mouth... She couldn't help but kiss him back, feeling her legs getting weaker and weaker. He left her mouth to look intensely into her eyes.

"It will..." He leaned to suck on her neck. "happen..." He traveled to her ear and tugged on her earlobe with his teeth and her eyes rolled. "again." He pressed her hips to his crotch and she tried to suppress a moan but failed miserably.

"That's it...I'm going to hell." She had a second of lucidity and drew back from him, sitting back on her chair. "Okay, you have a point, I'm weak and you and your fucking perfect body are devilish. That doesn't mean I want that." "Seriously? You're still gonna pretend you don't want us to be together after that? Bullshit!" "I don't know what I want, Misha! Actually yeah... I want us to go back in time and get out of the hospital after the fire with everyone still alive, and we would go to college and get married and be happy like we planned. Can we do that? NO! Every other scenario where I would have to share you or destroy your family is unacceptable."

"Are you done? Who said you would have to share? You're just scared, I understand that, and it's normal. I won't force you to anything, and I won't do anything before talking to Vicki. But unlike you, I know exactly what I want, I will give up only if I know for sure that you don't want it too. But for now... We should go out of this room and have some fresh air to clear our minds. How about we go to the park, then we can go have dinner somewhere, and you know what I would love to do?" Her face turned into a puzzled expression as she squinted her eyes. "I would love to check out of here and spend our last night at the farm."

She almost gasped. "What? There's nothing there! No water, no power... No beds!" "Like I care. I lived like that before, remember?"

Oh snap... Of course she remembered but she hadn't thought about it and now she felt slightly embarrassed and guilty. "Yeah you did but... This is different... I mean... It's wild and full of... Insects and who knows what else and..." He chuckled. "When did you become so townie? You're a countryside girl! Where did your adventurous spirit go?" "It burnt away."

That harsh comment hit Misha like an ice cold shower. "I refuse to let you become that kind of person. We're going, period."

He stood up, put his jacket on, took his suitcase and left the room to go check out at the front desk, taking her with him by the hand. Lily sighed but had no other choice but to follow him... It's gonna be a damn long night.

#misha collins #fanfiction #long fic #slow built #when we were young #young!misha

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gasterimagines · 8 years ago

Note

How would the gasters react if someone had hurt their S/O and continued to threaten them often?

Undertale - He’d be so scared for you- Is this person dangerous? Do they know where you live, how to contact you…?- When you tell him about the threats, he’ll insist on going to the police- Until you inform him that the cops do jack shit to stop stalkers or past abusers until it’s too late- Still, he convinces you that it might help to file a report if you haven’t already- He can’t imagine why someone would ever hurt you!- Just thinking about what you might’ve gone through makes him want to cry…- You’ll never be out of his sight again- Whether you’re going to work, the grocery store, a friend’s house, right down the street- it doesn’t matter- He’s gonna follow you like a nervous puppy- Now he’s not the violent type at all, but if he ever sees this creeper in person they’re getting a death glare- And when an 8'2" monster with scars, pointy teeth and claws is glaring at someone, it leaves an impression- They don’t need to know that Gaster can’t even bear to squish a bug, let alone harm a personUnderfell - He’s going to make them pay- The very moment after you confess what’s been going on, he demands to know where they live- Whether you know or not, it’s probably best not to tell him- Brutal torture and/or murder would technically solve the problem, but I think the cons outweigh the pros here- Gaster’s been in your position before, and it enrages him to no end that you’re going through it- How fucking dare they do this to you- You, who are the kindest, most innocent person in his eyes- Okay ‘innocent’ is stretching it a bit, but he’s still pissed- You’ve been nothing but wonderful to him since you met, even when he certainly didn’t deserve it- He might go quiet and briefly question if he’s ever treated you the same way as they did/do now- Being a sarcastic asshole is one thing, but the last thing he wants to do is legitimately cause you harm- Acting like a decent person is such a struggle for him- You might notice a subtle, positive change in his behavior- Also, if he does find the person who’s sending you threats, there’s a 99% chance he’s going to beat them half to deathUnderswap - He may seriously consider taking you to his home cave in the Underground and never letting you leave again, for safety’s sake- The idea is quickly scrapped as being insane and impractical- Though it still tempts him- This is his worst nightmare come to life- There’s no predicting what people like this might do, no knowing if they’re serious about their threats- He’ll start burning letters or deleting messages that they send you before you can read them- If you thought UT Gaster was being overprotective, hoo boy- US is always there, watching over you- Maybe you can’t see him, but he’s definitely lurking in the shadows (and you know it, having learned his quirks and creepy habits long ago)- If anyone approaches, he’ll swoop on in and carry you to safety- Literally batman- The biggest issue with this is that most of the people you encounter are friends, neighbors, and otherwise harmless acquaintances- They’re left confused and a little scared after a cloaked figure suddenly snatches you away- You guys are gonna have to discuss a new solution together- He confesses how terrified he is that you’ll be hurt again- But admits that his current tactics are really not helpingOutertale - Why did you not tell him until now?!- He immediately freaks out- Which freaks you out too- Now you’re both in a panic- He equips your home with the highest rated security system money can buy- And even borrows a few of King Asgore’s royal guards and stations them at the gates- He insists that one follow you like a bodyguard at all times- It makes him feel so inadequate though- He wants to protect you himself, but this boy be smol- He’s the tiniest of the Gasters at only 5′3″ with a petite frame- I could pick him up like a freaking duffle bag- But all that really matters is that this person can’t reach you- Gaster won’t rest until you feel safe- Literally- He loses days of sleep agonizing over it- If it comes down to it, he’ll get you the best lawyer he can and testify against this creep

Mertale - His first thought is to wonder why humans are so cruel to each other- He’s frustrated at all of mankind- As well as himself- It’s not like he can help it, but he’s angry about being stuck in the water- What if this person got to you out on land?- They could do something awful and Gaster would never know- He gets super anxious every time you leave- You can’t stay by the shore all day, of course- But he wishes there were some way he could come with you- If you could somehow lure the person to the beach, Gaster would happily scare the shit out of them- It’d make them think twice about contacting you knowing there was a literal sea monster on your side- He asks you to bring any letters they’ve sent you, or any sort of objects you associate with them- Confused, you comply- He then tells you you throw them out into the water- Just- Throw them- You both watch the stuff sink into the sea and drift away- Littering aside, it does feel nice to let go of those things- Like closing that painful chapter of your life

#reactions #gaster #w. d. gaster #undertale imagines #gaster imagines #undertale #underfell #underswap #outertale #mertale #angst

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ryryanfunko-blog · 8 years ago

Photo

“I GOTS DA GIFT!”: Marty McFly & DeLorean Funko Pop!

Obtained: Christmas 2014 Photos Posted On: Dec. 1, 2015

So this is the only Pop that I’ve got that came with another object, and I really liked it. I’d seen it on Hot Topic’s website and quickly noticed it cost somewhere like $23? or $25? Something like that. And again, at this time, I still wasn’t crazy about Funko Pops. But, I am a big Back to the Future fan. It’s definitely one of my favorite movies of all time. And I know, I know, there’s three of them. But I’ll group ‘em in all together as “a movie,” just for the sake of ranking favorite movies. Because frankly, my top favorite movies seem to be a line of movies with sequels. And I can’t really choose one over the other, because they all really stand well together (except, admittedly, I think Back to the Future III was meh). So, Inception’s my favorite movie of all time at this point, but some movies following that in no particular order are the Back to the Future movies, The Matrix movies, the Ocean’s trilogy, and more.

Tangent again, but whatevs. So, I saw it on Hot Topic’s site, and I wasn’t that crazy for Funko Pops yet. So seeing a price tag of $23-25 for a toy? Didn’t make sense to me. So I passed. But anytime I’d be on a computer, I’d often find myself going back to HotTopic.com just to look at it, LMAO. And by now, I’ve come to realize, if I find myself re-checking some sort of product, it’s a sure sign I do want it, and if I can, I should probs get it. But I didn’t think like that at the time, so I’d online-window-shop it and then get back to my regular routine. But Christmas was nearing, and from my last funko blog post, you’d know I just bought a Frieza Pop to gift to my brother. Well, so, for Christmas, or any gift-giving occasion, my brother’s straight to the point and doesn’t like to play guessing games, and this is one of the things I like about him: he asks you straight up what you want. LMAO. I love it because for Christmas, my brother and sister are both like Santa Claus in a way. My sister really plays into it though. She literally comes over with SACKS of gifts. Multiple gifts. Not cheap little stocking stuffers. She buys multiple nice gifts and puts them in a sack, for each person. Thing is though, if I’m being honest, she often does get things she thinks may be cool or useful, but actually might not be. Again, it’s the thought that counts… But in that way, she’s like Santa Claus. My brother though, although he doesn’t gift with multiple items or huge sacks, he’ll accept lists from me, LOL. I’ll give him a list of things I want and he might get me one or two of them. But at least it’s a guarantee of what I actually want! So that’s always been cool. Oh, and when I said he doesn’t sack his gifts, I forgot to clarify that he doesn’t do anything to wrap or conceal them either. He just gives it to you straight in the store bag he bought it from, LOL. But whatevs, I gots da gift! Oh, and another thing; my sister, although it’s nice she sacks up a bunch of gifts, for a few years I’d send my Christmas list to my closest family members, to sort of make it easy for them like my brother; you know, take the guess work out of it. I’d try to be as polite as possible though, because it does feel strange to ASK for gifts, but I mean, if we’re being real, if we know the gifts are coming, wouldn’t we not want our money to go to waste and get something the other person may not even like? I’m all for playing it safe and being sure they’ll want and like the gift. But my sister made it clear she doesn’t like that I send out a list, and that it’s not my Birthday (ie: I shouldn’t get to choose). I get it. So she blatantly ignores my lists and gets me what she thinks I’ll like. And well, let’s just say that my closet can only fit so much…

;-)

Another tangent. Weeeee! LOL. My bad. It ties in though. Read on, reader.

So anyway, Christmas was nearing and my brother asked for a list from me. I forget exactly what was on that list now… I vaguely recall some weight-lifting related item… maybe that was at the top of my list. I think it was some weight lifting gloves. Not sure though. There were some other stuff too, but I know the Marty McFly Funko Pop was included. And well, voila! My brother gifted me the Marty McFly Funko Pop!! From…??

(This is where you guess)

(Keep guessing)

(This isn’t where I do one of those annoying things people do in conversations and go, “Guess what? *they answer it without actually allowing you a chance to guess*)

(I’m actually gonna allow you a chance to guess)

(Okay, time’s up, over… blaow! snap back to… the future… – see what I did there? ;-)

(Major brownie points to whoever got those references)

(Yes, there were two references in that one line)

(BTW, screw brownie points. Like sorry brownies, imma let you finish, but Krispy Kreme donuts are the best sweets in the world)

(Cinnabons are close behind though, without a doubt)

HOT TOPIC! DOT COM! Yep, he ordered it from their site (I told him where he could get each gift, should he get them). But I knew he got it from HotTopic.com because, as usual, he did nothing to conceal it. He gave it to me inside the shipping box with invoice slip and all, LMAO. Oh!!! It’s coming back to me. He got me this pop, but also did get me weight lifting gloves! Sports Chalet!! But, he got the wrong size, and they didn’t have my size in stock, so he ended up just returning them, but that was totally fine. So yep, Christmas of 2014, we ended up exchanging Funko Pops, basically. LOL. I got him a Frieza and he got me a Marty McFly with his DeLorean. I ended up placing this awesome little dude and his whip on my TV counter with the other pops I had, right on top of the cable box. Soon, I’d move it over to the corner of my desk. It’s currently on the top of my Funko shelf case that I’ll most likely post online at some point. I’ve posted pics of it online at various moments, but the line-up always changes. :-)

So yeah, I was super stoked to get this Pop. Although I wasn’t crazy over Funko Pops quite yet, I’d been kinda side-eyeing them. In a curious way. One of the things that helped was that my co-worker Kasey displayed some out-of-box Funko Pops on his desk, one of which was his Deadpool Pop. Just seeing it at his desk every day kinda had me intrigued to their cute little designs. And so, any time I’d walk past a Hot Topic, I’d just look at the Pops, but not necessarily feel a desire to buy one. But every time I’d see the Marty McFly Pop on Hot Topic’s site, I always thought about how cool of an out-of-box Funko Pop it would be to have, since it was with the freaking DeLorean!!

I just love the Back to the Future movies. The 2nd one is my favorite because of its futuristic elements. I loved the futuristic ideas they had; the self-lacing shoes, the hoverboard, the self-drying jacket, their fashion. I dunno, I dug it. It’s also pretty cool how some of those things are being attempted to be produced today. I’m kinda iffy on it because of how its being done. I mean first off, the self-tying shoes, Nike came out with some a few years ago. Except I heard they weren’t even self-lacing, they were just replicas. Meaning, they were just designed/modeled after the movie’s shoes. But it was still cool; they looked fresh. But, they were super limited and were only being sold on eBay, I think. But they sold for super insane amounts of money. So that wasn’t realistic to get. Then they made another attempt at it like last year in 2016, but I didn’t follow through with the news on it. Also like super limited/unattainable/crazy-expensive, so I didn’t care for it again. But then they were making another actual self-lacing shoe that was more affordable, but this thing looked ugly. Looked like a Skecher shoe with a nike swoosh on it. No offense to Skecher wearers. :-) And secondly, like seriously, hoverboards. We’ve got “hoverboards” today. I’m not sure why we call it that when they’re just segways without handlebars, which may or may not explode. *shrugs*

But anyway, yeah, I love the Back to the Future films, 3rd was meh, and 2nd was my fav. I forgot how I ever got introduced to the films. I think my dad introduced me to the movies… maybe he rented them on VHS? or perhaps we caught them on TV? I’m leaning towards VHS though. But anyway, I loved them so much that in my late high school years, or maybe even early college years, I’m not quite sure… but around that time, when I had some money of my own, I bought the trilogy on DVD. This is big for me, because I don’t like buying movies on DVD. I don’t like rewatching movies. It’s too much time to dedicate to watch something I’ve already seen and already know what’s gonna happen. And to pay to re-do something? Not my ideal spend of money. But, when it's a film I really enjoy? I’ll shell out some cash for it :-) So I got myself the trilogy and rewatched it in all of its glory. I remember back in the day too that my best friend at the time, Jason, would catch one of the movies on TV. We’d be on the phone together, and I’d put on my DVD and ask him where he’s at in the film, and I’d fast forward to that part and it’d be like we were watching together. Fun times. But now, I can’t actually find my trilogy of DVDs :’( (nor can I find Jason, LMAO, but that’s a whole other topic). If only this Funko Pop DeLorean could bring me back in time………. LOL, I was gonna make some cheesy joke about going back in time to find that DVD trilogy… But how much of a waste would that be? Imagine? Using some time travel machine just to find an old DVD set I had, when things like Biff as President and stupidvisors exist? Yeah, real smart use of time travel, Ry. :p

So as for the Funko photos themselves… The first photo with the newspaper was a photo I was stoked to take a pic of. Just archiving the fact I have these two things, is enough to encapsulate my fandom for the movie. I love the fact that USA Today came out with their own Back to the Future themed paper on the date that Marty travelled to the future. For one thing, that was massively creative, and perhaps took a lot of patience on USA Today’s part. Like, I wonder when they thought up to do this, and how long the company’s been waiting to publish it, LOL. And also, it finally put an end (?) to all those ridiculous memes that would pretend “oh, this is the day and year that Marty travelled into the future!” Like nope, nice try, clickbait. No really, nice try. A bunch of “fans” fell for it. But it was easy to tell when they were fake memes. The original Back to the Future setting takes place in 1985. That’s the starting point. Marty basically travels 30 years in either direction. Don’t @ me about the 3rd movie when he goes into the ol’ west, because I don’t care about that, and I’m like 95% certain 1985 is still a good reference point, because he probably ended up going back to 1885. So back to the meme. If he is only going 30 years in either direction, that means 2015 was the year of his travel into the future. BOOM. Case Closed. (Love that anime.) So the newspaper though, I wasn’t able to snag it the morning it came out for like a number of cents… or whatever newspapers cost these days. I had to order it online from USA Today’s website for like $4 D,: LOL.

The second photo was just a standard pic to take in Marty and his whip, LOL. I love Funko’s mold of the DeLorean. It’s done perfectly, IMO. Just the right percentage of a used and dated look to it, but not overly raggy, which captures the essence the ride always had in the movies :’). Also, I love the irony of the car itself. It looks like a cheap hunk of metal. Like not high-class or sophisticated looking. But its function is quite the opposite and performs an action of only the highest of class and sophistication! The third pic, well, I was hoping to just snap a shot of Marty and the DeLorean in front of the DVD box I had… But alas, it was lost somewhere… in the past… so instead I grabbed some Calvin Klein tag laying around and just snuck it in as an Easter egg treat for any of those who really dig Back to the Future :-) And if you don’t know the reference, you’re not finding it here. Go watch the movie(s)!

https://twitter.com/_RyRyan/status/671708238560161792

#Funko #FunkoPop #FunkoFriday #RyRyan #BacktotheFuture #Time #MartyMcFly #DeLorean #CalvinKlein #HotTopic #Christmas #USAToday

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