#if im being entirely honest that’s mostly why it’s taking so long

[alovesreading]

Hey! Loved constant repeat so much I've read it twice now since finding it last year 😂 but just wondered was there any update on the next part of this? I know people have previously asked so no pressure, just can't wait to see what happens next!

twice?! you’re a fucking legend!!! thank you a million for reading anon 😚

well next part is defo happening, you can see we have 2 chapters and an epilogue left on that one. lots of stuff going on in my life rn so it’s been taking a while but i’m slowly writing!

focusing on CSD at the moment, but i promise CR is coming too!!

thanks again for reading and for sending this in!!! xxxx

[moncharrow]

water polo player! abby

a/n: hey!! i know i said id be posting for ellie first but this thought hasn't left me for a month. i love the though of this oh my god i am feral. thanks for reading! rb or comment to support a lil fic author :) also i'm gonna be referring to water polo as a super gay sport and that's because it is xoxo i mean high contact with buff women. like.

-content/warnings: 1.4k, mentions of contact sport violence, smut scenes (strap, riding abby, nickname 'beautiful', semipublic sex in a locker room, fingering, oral (both receiving), gn reader but has a pussy, mentions of roughhousing in water/ drowning (not really drowning but yk)

men dni.

water polo is one of the most intense sports- it's high contact, rough, with a high probability of being punched, getting a black eye, etc

but when you're as buff as ms abby anderson here, it's not as big of a deal

there aren't really many set positions in wp, but the most important one is center- placed front-and-center of the goal, they're the person everyone looks to to get a good shot

center has to be dependable, strong, and fast

abby is perfect! her drive is amazing (ahem ahem) and she's constantly swimming like crazy to get into position so her team can rely on her

she started in high school, learning the ropes and getting to know the sport

got crazy good, and was definitely a very proud varsity athlete. she knows she's good, so why shouldn't she flaunt a bit?

im gonna be honest she absolutely wore her varsity jacket for way too long during freshman year in college

she joined her collegiate team (possibly on a small grant/scholarship) and met the most amazing team

it's hard to be queer in sports a lot of the time, but her entire team is queer/allied!! she has a space to be herself which she really appreciates

she blossoms on that team

every girl at her college absolutely drops their panties for her im not even kidding. its not even that fun to her because she just wants someone to love, not just a hookup

((that doesn't mean she rejects them all though))

the pretty center draws crowds to the natatorium

and that includes you, of course

you're a friend of the goalie and you're not all that into sports, but once you hear that the hot girl you've been thirsting over in org. chem is there?? it's all over, goodBYE

you are seated right in the action, front row of the bleachers, cheering in school colors, pretty eyes glimmering in the bright sun, sweat drops dripping down the front of your shirt

abby is fully focused on her game but when she's benched she gets a liiiiiittle distracted ngl

like i said though, she's mostly game face

but after a win? she feels like she's never lost. she's pure confidence and she decides to keep the streak going and see if she can successfully get your number

it's slightly awkward because when abby gets closer she sees that wow you are so much more attractive than she first thought when she had chlorine water in her eyes

so she just doesn't ask you out lolol she bails and bugs the goalie about you for the week leading up to the game, asking who you are, if you're coming next time, if you like this or that

her hands are so large and strong from gripping that ball... just imagine what they could be used for !

her thighs are absolutely massive- she has to stay above the water somehow, and the kicking she has to do has sculpted her into a thunder-thigh goddess

eating her out is insane because she fucking clamps down on your head with her thighs LMAO

broad shoulders that you can hold while riding her

strong shoulders that you grip and squeeze onto for dear life every night before a game as she plows into you for "good luck"

-the room is filled with the rhythmic slapping of her skin against your thighs as she grips your hips and bucks up into you.

"taking it so well for me, huh? my little good luck charm..." and you can't say anything. you just whine as you feel every muscle in her body working overtime to treat you just right

the veins in her forearms throb and pop out as she bounces you up and down, touching and squeezing and groping everywhere she can. she looks up at you cheekily, biting her lips and grinning. "there we go, beautiful, look 't you go"

"i'll be sore tomorrow" she says. it isn't a complaint. she says it's her favorite workout

yeah she says she's done but she's also finger fucking you in the locker room during half-time

-"sorry coach, i'll be quick, i promise!" abby lifts herself out of the pool with pure upper body strength, muscles tensing and water dripping off her like some kind of lesbian wet dream. when she promises haste, she means you'll be quick, because you know the drill. you're already amongst the rows of lockers as abby pushes you against them, sliding past your underwear and shoving her fingers in. her thumb is on your clit, middle and ring fingers finding your g-spot immediately and going at it relentlessly. "think you can do 5 minutes for me, beautiful?

-you can because she won't accept anything else. you're cumming all over her fingers, groaning at the overstimulation as she fucks you through it. when you're done, she pulls out, inserting her fingers into her mouth and cleaning them. you shoot her a playful dirty look as she jogs back out the locker room door

-"thanks for the pep talk, babe!" girl.

she wins every game and says it's because of you

it's sweet, but she's just that good of an athlete

but if you met her because you play too? oh get ready for a whole 'nother world

you're her defense during practice, in the trenches with her and jumping over her shoulders to make sure she doesn't get the ball

but she'll do petty shit to fluster you, like turning and kissing your shoulder and holding your hand in the middle of wrestling for position like ???

-"anderson!" the team captain reprimands. she gives a cheeky smile and puts her game face back on, pinching your thigh underwater where nobody can see

water polo players' love language is straight up drowning people. like the coach yells for everyone to meet him in the corner of the pool and instead she's fucking barrelling toward you, wanting to pull you under

when you're waiting to practice throwing the ball into the goal, she'll slide under the surface and tug at your ankles to pull you

when you come back up, she's giggling like a child and acting like it was another teammate

-"abby, i know it was you, you idiot!" you say, grinning

despite not really having jerseys like in other sports, abby will have you wear her team merch with logos

you wear last year's team shirt to bed, her flannel pants to class, her two-piece tops when you go to the beach with her

you go crazy for her when she's in her polo suit. they're tight so that players can't get grabbed, but it's tight in all the right places

it showcases abby's broad shoulders and slutty waist, curving around her chest and tastefully contouring her back muscles

thank god for this sport, you think

she always complains about how the suit rides up her butt, giving her a slight wedgie, but it gives you perfect access to her tight ass

smacksmacksmack

-"can you hold off for one minute, babe?"

-"no."

it's like there's no person attached to that ass. and she's just as obsessed with yours dw! she uses those big hands to grasp your entire cheek and land a harsh slap! on there that makes you jump. she just smiles n laughs

water polo! abby who takes you out to dinner after games and ends up stealing your food because "ohmygodbabeimsohungryyoudontevenunderstand"

it's like she's never eaten

speaking of eating... (im sorry)

she will throw your legs open when she eats you out. if you try to shut them she'll use the full force of her forearms to pin your thighs down and dig her face deeper in your pussy, sucking and licking like a woman starved

who wrote that. i didn't. anyways..

you put her hair up in a fishtail braid for her !! then she'll ask you to put her swim cap on and give you a cute smile when you screw it up

-"i fucked it up! sorry!"

-"babe it looks great" while she's tucking all her shorter hairs into the bottom of it

if her team is winning by a lot, she'll mess around a bit and point at you after she scores a goal, and you roll your eyes and your face feels hot because she's so ridiculous

but you do feel a lil special.

anyways water polo abby mi amor :3333 take me in the locker room

[richeeduvie]

Can someone please explain to me the whole baby thing? And dog bone au? And all these aus im so confused

DOG AND BONE!AU BASICS

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.

This is asked every five months and I'm happy to explain it each time! I'll put it in the pinned post! This is a long one so sorry yall

So Dog and Bone is the title to the AU for a self-insert x Roman Roy fic compilation. There's no actual series yet…sorry, I know! How long has it been? But these fics range from entire one-shots that center around a plot that can lead into another one-shot/drabble, with the content of said piece becoming important to the whole AU, to just cute, fluffy or smutty drabbles and blurbs. Most of them are based on requests. Your request could become a big part of Dog and Bone!

BABY

Baby is the name for the self-insert. Fics will flip from a second person to third person POV, so you'll see her referred to as 'Baby' a lot. I don't consider her an OC because there's no and will never be a physical description of her and to be honest, I only started to referred to her as Baby so I could write third person POV fics when I'm lazy and don't want to go heavy in internal monologue, which is what I do for second person POV fics. I never use 'Y/N' for her or any self-insert. But many see her as other people and not themselves and I love that too!

Personality-wise, you'll find her to Roman's soulmate. Although she is still a victim of being out-of-touch due to her wealth, she's managed to be kind and respectful and just something that Roys don't have outside of her. She's the ultimate nepo baby with Logan just giving her some vague career path at Waystar to keep her around. She mostly works in marketing and spends her days with Tom and Greg. So, the story of DAB (lol). Baby is the childhood best friend of Roman (and Shiv). In the AU, Baby's biological father was Logan's best friend and business associate. She met the Roy family when she was five and when Roman when almost seven. She was meant to be the best friend of Shiv, but Roman stole her one day when Shiv when to get more toys and baby Baby was on the swings. His sister is still pissed about this to this day.

Nothing much has been mentioned of Baby's bio dad just yet, but it was a one-time thing (so understandable is yall don't remember) that we see Logan giving Baby the medal her father gave him after his funeral. He's dead and apparently fought in a war, or maybe just liked collecting medals as much as Logan did.

So, facts about the dead dad:

Maybe was a veteran

Was hinted to have given Baby an eating disorder

Died when she was eight

Possibly kept her away from her mother

Logan's her godfather, but it was Frank to take her in after her dad had passed. Frank ON TOP!!!! PAPA FRANK!!! Baby's mother is very distant and she's really only seen her for a few holidays throughout her childhood. I've always imagined her to be those wealthy hippies feigning spirituality and did maybe try to get Baby in terms of custody, but didn't try a lot - not even after Baby's father died. So, Baby gets to stay with the Roys with Frank being her guardian. With this, it's just co-dependency and possessiveness growing.

Roman and Baby don't really have friends outside of each other. They do everything together and eventually start doing relationship sort of things together. They take each others virginities. Roman gets panicky and painful in the muscles if Baby has to leave him for more than three days. It's great, but nothing's official.

They live this way until Roman gets with Tabitha.

Now, you may be thinking 'Why does he begin a relationship with Tabitha if he's so possessive and seemingly satisfied with the situation he has with Baby?' Well, I have two fics that'll help you to explain Roman's stupidity:

Why Does Rome Still Date Tabitha (They Don’t Have Sex, but Still) Kendall Wins!AU Confession

The latter of the two is a bit more personal and truthful for Roman. It can be noted that as much as I am a GerriRoman supporter, their relationship does not happen in the DogandBone!AU. Only because one, frankly, I don't know how to or have the desire to thread it throughout the story because I already kept Tabitha's plotline…which is Roman's downfall. You will see. And two, you'll find that Roman and all of the Roys, really, have a lot of themselves changed all because they have one genuine friend that's cared and loved them since childhood so that big part of Roman's plotless plot-time in canon is gone here. Grace didn't happen as well because Jesse Armstrong said so lol.

As I said, the genuine friend line applies to all of the Roys (excluding Logan, except for his AU…), but it really applies to Kendall. Going back to the point where Baby and Roman are fourteen/fifteen and fifteen/sixteen, he gets sent away to military school. I made it so he's only there for two years to which Logan just doesn't care to send him there anymore because I want Baby and Roman teenage puppy and needy love for as much as I can get it. During this time, Kendall has this belief, this kindness to take in Baby when she's at her loneliest.

and…so…Kendall and Baby's whole thing?

The link above sums up their whole situation but I'll elaborate a bit more here because there's Tern Haven. Tern Haven happens in the OG!DogandBone!AU and KendallWins!AU, the grooming situation happens in every AU.

Of course, Roman comes back and Baby sobers up for the most part and leaves groomer Kendall's ass in the dust! It's when Roman starts dating Tabitha decades later that Kendall, who never actually made a move on Baby, brings hell and tragedy to the family. Baby's not so keen on continuing to have sex and the weird thing she has with Roman as he is with Tabitha around, so she becomes lonely and thoughtful in the need to reconnect with friends, maybe start dating herself. She's there during Tern Haven and can't go to Roman's room to hang out, Tabitha's there. She doesn't bother Shiv and Tom, she could talk with Frank, maybe? Maybe, but she makes her way to Kendall's room.

And whatever high horse Kendall put himself on for not doing anything with Baby, maybe not being in love with her - or at least having no awareness about it, whatever was starting with Naomi, it's gone when Baby enters that room.

Again, Tern Haven happens in Kendallwins!AU and the OG!AU. The only difference is that after, Roman is either successful in pulling Baby away from Kendall, or he isn't. This is where it can get confusing as it can with all the AUs because there's so many little splices of moments within content that really helps you understand how things happen but I can say that the Kendallwins!AU is just sad, scary, and dark.

But enough of that!

OG!DOGANDBONE!AU

After Roman's successful in getting Kendall away from Baby, he immediately breaks up with Tabitha and they heal from what happened. Kendall declines quickly during this. Logan dies and they get married after the GoJo sale. They have Baby Jr. On occasion, we'll have fun and write them having two more kids, Baby Jr Jr and Roman Jr, but they aren't canon - or they at least would get a canon fic like Baby

FICS TO HELP: Romulus Sneakers | Dad Frank feat. Baby Roman Call Them Brothers Back in Town Bone and Her Heart Roman’s a Friend Stealer While you were sleeping Touch Me (I'm Sick) Date Death | Part One Date Death Part 2 Babied (He Loves It) Violet, Blue, Green, Red To Keep Me Out Phone Call Home Baby Baby in “I went to Market” Baby in ‘Too Much Birthday’ After the GoJo Sale Telling Roman She's Pregnant

BABY JR

Baby Jr is an unrealistically perfect angel of a child that belongs to Roman and Baby in their AU and was born a preemie with a slew of health problems, but because I love her so much, it's becoming a running joke for her to just exist in every AU, somehow. if Baby's there, Baby Jr's there. She's named fittingly. You'll see her a lot in smaller blurbs and fics. Another running joke is that she hates Kendall in every AU, though she's barely mentioned outside of the OG! and Loganwins!AU.

JUST MY FAVORITE BABY JR FICS:

Baby Baby's First and Last Day at School Bear Baby Jr! Baby Jr Doing Something Dangerous Connor Taking Baby Jr Fishing Baby Jr seeing Baby Roman with Glasses

VARIATIONS OF THE OG!AU

They aren't mentioned a lot anymore because we don't get so serious about them and it was more just to have fun with the story, but the OG!AU does have some variations to how the plot goes. You have Baby and Roman having Baby Jr before season one where Tabitha and Tern Haven are things that obviously never happened:

If Roman Knocked Baby Up Logan Bullying Baby Jr YoungBornBabyJr!AU With Roman Forcing Baby to Marry Him Roman Drunk and Loving If Roman Knocked Baby Up in Their 20s If Baby Jr was Little in The Pilot Logan’s Baby Jr Favoritism Where’s Your Daughter?

Then, you have Baby dying and Roman killing himself to leave Baby Jr an orphan: Come Time, Baby Jr Missing Mommy.

Or you have Baby AND Baby Jr dying to leave Roman killing himself after his last moments of suffering…which, I can't find, but do we really want to read that?

If you don't want to suffer, it can end simply as a nightmare Roman had in the night. Here's another Nightmare Blurb.

LOGANWINS!AU

Listen. I CANNOT be the only person who has consistently written for Logan. I CANNOT! But I do and Baby is unfortunately the victim of a joke turned into a horniness for an old, old man.

Logan doesn't actually have a fic establishing the Loganwins!AU. Everything that's longer than a blurb are moments that already take place after they've gotten together. Tern Haven does not take place here because it appears that this…intimate relationship takes place before season one. Roman doesn't get together with Tabitha in this AU because he's really fucked up about his soulmate having sex and marriage with his…Dad. His abusive Dad. Baby Jr does exist here! This started as a joke to get people grossed out over old man Logan cock, I played it so I was DISGUSTED to appease any requests that were sent in. I really was. I don't know what happened. But a lot of what is written expands past Logan x Reader and more about the AU itself, which happens with Kendallwins! and the OG!AU too.

FICS TO HELP: THE OFFICE CONFRONTATION Mondale The Second Baseball Sick Baby Jr Mom(my) Siblings and Baby Jr Buzz off! Sister Shiv Recital Alone Baby Jr How Does The Relationship Begin? How Does Logan Propose? Are Baby and Roman Still Close? Pregnancy Announcement in the AU They Bought a Cat Who's Baby Jr's Godfather? Panty Stealer Roman's Twitter Argument

You guys are lucky I can't find the smut fic I wrote. But it's here on this blog. Somewhere.

Nvm here it is my bad: Reflections.

AFFAIR!AU

There's the Loganwins!AU, then there's the Affair!AU, which was established pretty recently. It's where Baby begins an affair with Roman while she's married to Logan and Baby Jr ends up being Roman's daughter, not his little sister. As much as I have accepted my great enjoyment in indulging the Logan lovers, I do think this is Baby at her most Succession.

She gets the benefits of being Logan's wife and his favorite wife, a cute daughter, Roman at her heel, whining for her to really be with him but knowing he'll never leave her at her denial. She's horrible, a whore. A baddie winning.

FICS TO HELP: Baby Jr being Roman's Daughter Roman and Newborn Baby Jr Baby in the Affair!AU Roman revealing she's his to his siblings "Dada" A Slight Confrontation How does it start? In Dad's Bed

GROOMING SITUATION (OG!AU and KENDALLWINS!AU)

So, I explained most of it above, but these are the fics to help understand just how messed up DogandBone!Kendall is. He's a different man, guys.

(Also Stewy was there. Stewy was her friend. A flawed twenty-something year old who didn't care enough to separate himself from Kendall when noticing the red flags of him and Baby, but he denied, denied, denied. But he also gave Baby some sense of being…ya know, a kid…cause he saw her as a CHILD)

Tern Haven:

Tern Haven EXTENDED TERN HAVEN More of Tern Haven (…Yay…)

Ken's Groomer Era:

Sleepover Drugged Up Heart Does Baby go Clubbing With Kendall? The Birthday (Big One) Kendall being Confused That Baby's Not Jealous More of Ken being Confused That Baby's Not Jealous Sleepover 2 Kendall's Birthday Gifts....

The Aftermath:

Smacktalking During Too Much Birthday Bad Bit

There's more, of course. There's always more.

KENDALLWINS!AU

After Tern Haven, Kendall has Baby. He's won Baby. He gets more addicted to drugs while making her dependent on them. He turns her into nothing - and just for him. He's scary and paranoid when it comes to Roman. A variation of the AU would be the Babydies!AU, where she accidently overdoses after he leaves her alone. It's a lot. This is not a fun AU, guys. But I like to write it!

FICS TO HELP:

Housewife Thing Waystar Press Conference Accusing Baby Jr of Not Being His Roman Trying to Get Baby Back From Kendall A Slight, Brotherly Confrontation Daily Does of Horror (Heroin) Mention of Heroin Handsy Baby and Kendall and Pills Panty Stealer Brother Roman's Dick Pics Saying Roman's Name Flower Delivery

THE OD FICS:

No Time Needled Memories

NOW....

SHIV'S AU

Shiv's AU isn't even a win!AU, technically. We haven't really dabbled in the idea of her winning. Just more of her yearning, but all in all, this woman wants Baby soooo badly. Too sad she has the guilt of being a woman. And her father. And Tom. And the denial hot on her skin.

Calling Shiv Shiv

TOM'S AU

Apparently the man can get obsessed and they haven't even kissed in his AU, yet. Fitting considering the shit he pulls with Greg. It's Baby at her most guilty due to her friendship with Shiv.

KARL'S AU

No.

STEWY'S AU

I give crumbs and only crumbs. But we're getting something started with Wedding Bells (Part One)!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.

I hope this helps! xoxo

[zivazivc]

im too scared to ask because of the answer but is Hed and Les relationship ok?

(you should be scared)

They love each other unconditionally and are closer than most siblings, and I want to answer with a definite yes, but it’s more of a soft yes.

They’d die for each other and would never want to cause each other any harm, but they both hold very deep-rooted and painful resentment toward each other. This anger, while valid on its own, feels unjustifiable and selfish to both brothers, and is why they have a hard time addressing it. It only starts to get resolved later (for now I’m aiming at the time frame after Floyd leaves the band and before Les runs into him again, which is Hed’s late twenties and Les’s early thirties) when Les finally opens up to Hed about things that happened during their early childhood in the Rock Kingdom, which Hed was too young to comprehend or remember, and this revelation puts a lot of things into perspective for Hed and is extremely cathartic for both of them.

Like I’ve mentioned, Les didn’t talk to Hed about his trauma, (they are four years apart which is a big gap when you’re a kid), and Hed could never fully understand why Les had taken him with him to the Funk Kingdom. It’s a question he never receives an honest answer to, and it’s something he (although unwillingly/with doubt) resents him for since he had a difficult childhood in Vibe City as the only tiny Rock Troll who always got othered and excluded, even bullied.

There is also the related issue where Hed doesn’t understand why his brother is so troubled and disconnected, because he’s under the impression that they’ve more or less been in the same boat all their lives. That it’s always been them against the world. He even thinks Les had it better than him since he is half Funk and sticks out less like a sore thumb among a Funk society than Hed does…

I realize I’ve never addressed this directly, even though I figure some of you probably assume it already, but Les is a deeply depressed character and has been like this since he was very young (similar to Branch, although it’s expressed differently), and he has occasional episodes where he spirals and even becomes suicidal. The first time it happened and he tried to go through with it, Hed was only 8-10 years old, and the fact that his big brother was willing to end it all and leave him alone shook Hed’s entire world. The incident filled him with such intense fear and hurt that he cannot find it in him to forgive his brother for it no matter how much he wants to. He also developed anxiety surrounding Les’s mental state and is terrified of letting him out of his sight for longer periods for fear of losing him.

Les’s resentment towards Hed stems mostly from jealousy and not knowing where to direct his own hurt, and he hates himself for these feelings because none of it is Hed’s fault. — Hed is/was both of their dads’ favorite son, and as far as Les is convinced, he was their mom’s favorite too. He dodged all the worst abuse Les experienced under Butch, Butch even flaunted Hed as his son just to put Les down, and as a little kid Les pretty much hated his baby brother for it. Hed was always seen as the “better” brother even though Hed was a loud brat compared to Les. But it didn’t take long for him to grow on Ish and his roommates while there was always tension between Les and his dad (due to Les already being deeply messed up by the time they got to Ish). Hed in general is a charismatic social butterfly who knows how to get on trolls’ good side. He vibes with both Rock and Funk Trolls, and clicks with most music and trolls in general, while Les struggles with social interactions that aren’t work related and often comes off awkward, especially as a teenager, he’s more casual in his twenties and onward, though still very much closed off.

Hed is also very smart (academically. in regards to reading the room, he is a dumbass), he always kept up with school, which he was allowed to attend without question, there was even early talk about uni, while Les never even got to finish elementary school because of his poor performance and him getting expelled over an incident, and was forced to start working early.

Hed also (because of his small size) was often let off the hook when he’d get into trouble/do something stupid. He was babied (word used loosely) by Ish and their uncles a lot in general. If Hed broke something, he’d get yelled at while Les would have to fix it or pay for it out of his pocket. 

They lived under two completely different sets of rules all their lives and Les festered a lot of hurt from the unfairness of it.

Les’s resentment wanes over time. Floyd is the one who helps him find release for a lot of his bottled up pain during their time together. Floyd is basically the first person Les confides in about nearly everything he was put through, and he encourages Les to talk to Hed about it. Which he does after a few years, and Hed learning about what his brother was put through as a little kid is what allows him to finally understand and forgive his brother…

[hvenart]

Since Young Royals is over I wanted to take a look at some characters and kinda explain how I interpret them as people. (this is hella long but I’m mostly praising the show and how they handled things cus I’m an optimistic girl who loves life)

First of all you have the students of Hillerska. Hated them.

Genuinely cannot stand most of them and I gotta be honest, I was cheering for the school to close down. The toxicity and pure classism that radiates of that school is sickening but I’m afraid not unrealistic. As Willhelm said it’s in the walls of that place, it’s impossible to get it out. Everyone in Hillerska loves to pretend everything is fine. As Wilhelm said EVERYONE IS FAKE. Not just Hillerska but the monarchy and that entire system is too. While there are most likely very close friendships in the school it seems like nobody really knows or tries to understand each other. They refuse to acknowledge the fundamental problems of the school and instead party and just see the school closing as a sad thing.

Vincent is a perfect example of that. I love how they showed that queerness never was a problem for him. Vincent was fine with Nils being queer cus it doesn’t directly effect the system. Simon being a socialist who can possibly talk about the issues of the school was. I also think that he sees August purely as his role. He sees him as a party animal and having connections to the royal family. That’s the role he fulfills so he’s confused as to why he wants to be more than that because position wise he’s in a perfect situation. Him not knowing what August wants as a person and not knowing his best friend was queer just shows to me how little they know each other. How superficial their friendship is.

Nils is interesting. He’s queer and him being a person of Color all give him an interesting position in the whole system. He probably has a little more empathy and is a little less out of touch than his friends (ex. he is the first person to talk about how fucked up their initiation was) but he chooses to ignore it. I think that for him the pros outweigh the cons because at the end of the day he’s still rich and at the top of the foodchain at hillerska so it makes sense that he has no desire to change anything. Which brings me to why I LOVE felice.

Felice is by far my favourite character (Simon is a close second). She very much could turn a blind eye to everything and be like everyone else but she doesn’t want to anymore. I think being a black girl in Hillerska gave her more sympathy and understanding of the problems but I think even then she could’ve dealt with it like Nils because lets be honest racism is everywhere. But she realises if it’s already this bad for her she can’t imagine how it is for the people of the lower class. It made her see how fucked the hierarchy is and realise how deep it is engraved in the school. She realises that not even her best friends want to truly understand her struggles because it’s awkward for them (I said in another post her friends weren’t as bad as Vincent but honestly they’re just as bad). That realisation made her not wanna go to New York. She doesn’t wanna ignore her problems like everyone else but face them head on and goes to Sara. The one person who at the end wasn’t fake to her.

Im absolutely in love with Sara and Felice’s relationship. They kinda parallel Simon and Wilhelm in a way because Sara was the first truly honest person in Felice’s life just like Simon was to Willhelm although Felice and Sara are the platonic version of that (and while I loved that it portrayed the importance of friendship, my lesbian ass was really wishing they would’ve kissed like the TENSION but that’s just me). I also think that’s why the betrayal of her with August was so painful. She couldn’t care less about August, she cared about the fact that the one person she thought she always could rely on did that to her.

I also loved Sara this season. She’s a very flawed person yes but you could always tell her apologies were sincere. You could tell she had strong feelings for August but she was able to put Felice’s, Simon’s and most importantly her own feelings first. I was really scared they were gonna make her and August get back together in the end (especially with the conversation about giving people second chances in reference to her dad being also possibly about August) but they made sure to stick with her character development.

That brings me to August. He’s a really interesting character to me and I never know how to feel about him. He has done some horrible shit and at first I wanted him to suffer or do something big to try to make things right and I didn’t like how he never truly got his karma but I like how open they left his character. He obviously has some issues (eating disorder, trauma from his initiation,…) but he doesn’t ever delve deeper into them. He acknowledges the things he does and is obviously very sorry but just like the rest of the people in Hillerska and the Monarchy he ignores the causes of it. He never acknowledges his eating disorder. He’s probably aware that he has a problem (cus Simon pointed it out) but ignores it. He ignores the reasoning Sara gives for them not working out and gives her solutions that in the grand scheme will not change things. He still has huge respect for Eric despite what he did to him and the fact that it clearly left lasting traumas and just brushes it off. He longs for the Crown Prince role not even thinking about the harm that it can cause him. I said that he didn’t get karma but that’s not true. I think that the Crown Prince title is a curse and even if Wilhelm didn’t mean it that way, I think he got his final karma at the end by passing that curse down to him.

I love how they handled Wilhelm and Simon. Wilhelm had just like the rest of Hillerska and the monarchy the tendency to ignore things. Simon was the one who had to give him a wake up call and break things off. Simon forced him to face reality. He didn’t understand why Simon saw the title of Crown Prince as such a curse. Everyone ( ex. His mother) around him kept saying how much of a privilege it was that he never took a step back to question if it really was such an honour. His mothers words were so deeply engraved into him that it took him a while to finally be able to hear Simon. Simon wasn’t the reason why he didn’t want to be the Crown Prince, he just made him realise he never wanted any of this in the first place. It was never about Simon it was the fact that Wilhelm as a person was never really for the Monarchy. He loves his mother and the connection to his brother but he finally was able to let it go. He knows his brother still would’ve loved him but the perfect image of his brother the Crown Prince is gone. I don’t think he’s ever gonna forgive August but he has let it go and given him the title he so desperately wanted. His hatred towards him is not strong enough to keep the title of Crown Prince. In the relationship he was the one who needed to change. Sure Simon also went through growth and had to have a lot of understanding but it was Wilhelm who had to realise his core teachings and the way he thought of life were very flawed. He had to be his own person outside of the system that held him down so desperately. And even the mother understands that. She will always be part of the monarchy but she acknowledges that it nearly destroyed her and realises that she doesn’t want that to happen to her son and lets him go.

Hillerska, the monarchy and the classist hierarchy is not gonna change. But some people can. That’s why I think in the end there was no song about revolution. They didn’t have one. Sara, Felice, Wilhelm and Simon were the ones who truly got away from everything. They were able to get away from the schackles of the system and leave it behind. Even if Hillerska did reopen I doubt they would go back. They didn’t revolutionise anything other then themselves. There wasn’t a revolution but an evolution of themselves.

I think that’s a beautiful message. You can’t always change the bad things around you but you can change the things about yourself that were caused by the bad things around you. You can do and be better even when the world isn’t.

[adamworu]

hii i just wanted to say thank you for the years uve been posting eva and hyper-analyzing the series and kaworu especially .. i found ur blog after watching the series back when the Kaworu Database consisted mostly of soundboards and shit like that and despite my waning interest in the series ive not had the impulse to unfollow u. which is weird for me, because at the ripe age of 26 there’s a lot about nge that doesnt sit right with me anymore.

i got my boyfriend to watch NGE and the rebuilds with me and found myself genuinely ashamed way more than i’d anticipated. the last movie was the nail in the coffin for me specifically because of, let’s face it, the surplus of self-aware asuka fanservice. i was repulsed and denounced my interest in the series entirely. it was difficult to make such a claim because of how important to me the series was (still is, if im being honest) and how pivotal it was to my growth at the time i first watched it.

saw one of your posts on my dash today and went to take a casual look at your blog cuz i was curious as to how you were faring in the sea of eva content after a solid 10 years. looked at one of your posts explaining what nge is at its core and the messages it means to send and How it sends them and found myself falling back into the mindset of “fuck, i missed this shit.”

i appreciate how many years you’ve spent looking at evangelion as a piece of psychological horror, how many years you’ve spent dissecting it under a microscope with 50000x magnification. you’ve been the Only thing that’s brought eva back to the front of my feeble little brain over the past, idk five years or so, and youve now been the reason why i can still appreciate the series despite its flaws. you don’t focus on those flaws and it reads that you do so not because you don’t care, but because they’re obvious and don’t need to be stated. im starting to ramble and im sorry that this ask was long but dming you felt too.. personal despite this message being exactly that.

TL;DR, thank you for analyzing evangelion and kaworu nagisa for many years and singlehandedly reminding me of all the reasons why i enjoyed the series as much as i did when i first watched it. i know your interest in eva is waning, so thank you for what youve given the world over the last 10 years <3

Thank you ever so much! This blog sort of started as a way for me to navigate Eva myself. It's been 10 years and though my passion has fizzled, I still get those visceral feelings of Eva no matter what. It always pulls me in. I still have some of that juice left in me, but mostly I found other source material at the moment I'm highkey obsessed over (I'll give you a hint: cult classic, starts with V, ends with D). It's not all bad. I hope you have a wonderful day :)

[cacklefrendly]

I love how you draw your gin and vodka!!!!!they so cool and cute!!!now I wonder what is you're gin backstory.like do he parent work with the organization or something like that??I'm just curious

:D AWW THANKIEEE ANON!! i keep telling myself that i'm gonna draw them being threatening and. it doesn't happen. they end up being sappy again. so im glad i'm not the only one who enjoys it regardless lmao

as for backstories. uh.

good question.

what backstory my personal versions of Gin and Vodka DO have — and my versions of the entire Black Org. team, too — is vague enough to be almost canon-compliant while leaving plenty of wiggle-room in case future canon declares any new information i think is interesting. it's not a tactical choice! working around canon to make things complicated is part of what makes playing with side characters fun for me. :>

also i'll admit: i usually don't think much about a character's childhood unless it gives something meaningful to the story. i don't think it matters too much why Gin got into the Black Organization? to me, it matters more that he's there and making it everyone else's problem :P i might change my mind later though, we'll see!!

for Gin and Vodka, at least, their backstories are more of a years-long, vaguely three-arc showcase of who they are at wildly different points in their lives together, which has some really interesting moments implied but not explicitly stated.

just for fun, here's a synopsis of those 'Arcs': (i remembered to write a transcript this time, it's under the read-more)

“ARC” 1: SETUP (met once, briefly, by accident.)

VODKA (asides: “Just some dude” & “he uses cheap ballpoints and it hurts my soul. he gets better I promise.”)

maybe grew up in a rural area?

recently finished college, working at one of the Black Organization's front companies

dealing with being a closeted gay man while also trying not to get involved in normal office drama and still hear all the gossip

Very Aware that the company is doing some shady illegal stuff and is SUPER CURIOUS, but 1), he'd like to keep being payed thank you, and 2), he has enough self-preservation to know better than to go snooping

honestly he's just Some Guy

GIN (asides: “dysphoria hoodie” & “[PROTOTYPE] called, Alex wants his damn clothes back.”)

where did you even come from-

working as a low-level assassin with the Black Organization but already starting to garner attention from some of the higher-ups

aggressive, paranoid, AND experiencing dysphoria all at the same time!!! uh oh!!

dealing with the gradual realization that being trans is. a Thing. while also having a really bad-ass action movie as a life, complete with betrayal and murder and explosions

starts transitioning after he climbs the Organization's ranks enough to carve out a place he KNOWS he's safe and can relax

“ARC” 2: MEET-NOT-CUTE (a year or two after “Arc” 1)

VODKA

suffering from the aftermath of The Incident and trying to grapple with the fact that he's been working for an international crime syndicate

and trying to understand his role in all of this mess

and trying not to get killed by his new boss

AND is trying not to think about the fact that his new boss is SO scary and mean

AND trying SO HARD NOT TO THINK ABOUT HOW HE'S KINDA INTO THAT-

GIN

high-ranked enough that he can no longer keep working alone and he HATES IT SO MUCH

it's not just a blow to his pride, it's also all the paranoia. it's mostly the paranoia, to be quite honest

called dibs on the most harmless, pathetic-looking man he could find who still seemed to be useful. and that man was Vodka

even so, spends a good while CONVINCED that Vodka will turn on him if Gin gives him the chance.

BOTH

Gin keeps trying to bait Vodka into trying to kill him and is infuriated as nothing happens.

Vodka sees the bait and is confused at first, later horrified when he figures out what Gin's expecting him to do

as Vodka shows his usefulness, Gin starts to calm down. full-on Trust takes several years to develop

the first time Gin falls Asleep near Vodka freaks Gin out more than a little

“ARC” 3: GET A FUCKIN ROOM (roughly a few years before and into Canon)

Vodka: “If you want coffee you gotta’ let go.” Gin: “*unintelligible sounds of disapproval*”

they aren't in a romantic relationship. they haven't even had a one-night stand. and yet they carry a very "aging gays who've been married for 30 years" energy. it drives the Team up the wall.

before the Trust developed, Vodka let Gin control/initiate all contact as an appeasement/self-preservation strategy. at this point he still does it, but out of habit more than anything.

plot twist, Gin's actually super tactile with people he trusts. he invades Vodka's personal space constantly. it's especially bad when he's cold or tired (so, most of the time)

they know each other's boundaries very well even though they never, like, sat down and talked about it. it's been trial and error thus far. it helps that they're also good at reading each other.

Vodka's uncomfortable attraction turned into a crush, which turned into quiet love. Gin's wariness turned into trust, which turned into love. BUT Gin's doesn't think much about trust OR romance so he's not actually aware (yet) that his feelings for Vodka are more than Really Strong Trust. he also doesn't know Vodka's feelings for him (YET)

there are so many ways this fucking slow-burn could end and I love all of them too much to pick just one

[ask-egonspengler]

good evening and happy holidays, dr. spengler! im very interested in the study of specter classification and was wondering if you might expound upon the subject a little. more precisely, i am curious as to what motivates an appirition to take a certain form once it passes on. why do some ghosts manifest themselves physically, while others take hazy forms, or dont manifest at all? thank you for your time! :3

Happy holidays to you, as well. This is a fascinating question and one I’d be delighted to answer. I hope you’ll forgive me if this is less coherent or I’m more prone to rambling than I otherwise would be. It’s been a long, long day.

Ghosts, in the traditional sense (the spirit of a deceased person or animal which manifests to the living), don’t have much control over the way they appear, much as the living don’t have control over the features they’re born with. Much of it has to do with the way they were in life — the soul is, after all, the very core of their being.

Usually the dead will continue to inhabit this plane of existence only if they have reason to do so. Typically said reasons fall under one of two categories — the manner of death or unfinished business.

Victims of murder, war, accidental death, or traumatic illness often tend to hang around after death. Put simply, they just…weren’t ready to die. Their spirit held onto life after their mortal bodies gave out and as a result, a ghost is “born”.

Unfinished business is a vague term, and purposefully so, as it could be nearly anything. Some become ghosts because they never fulfilled a lifelong ambition, such as starting a business or having children. Others, once again, just weren’t ready to die. Or just happened to die with some heavy regrets.

Typically the way in which an entity manifests has something to do with the strength of its reason for being here. A mist or orb is usually a lackadaisical ghost with very little power. Higher classes of ghost often present as humanoid, if they can. It takes a certain amount of power for a ghost to manifest itself in that way, so some prefer to make their presence known in other ways. They’ll move objects, create cold spots, close doors, interfere with electronics, or subtly touch the living. Some will even carry a scent, like a specific type of perfume, a favorite food, or something linked to a hobby. Those who had contact with the ghost of Eleanor Twitty reported smelling old books and a powdery, floral scent of perfume. Speaking of Eleanor Twitty — as a spirit, she could manifest as humanoid in appearance, but if provoked, she turned grotesque and distinctly inhuman. This was due to the manner in which she died: she was murdered by her lover and thus, her ghost developed a temperamental attitude and a potent defense mechanism should she ever be crossed.

Honest, narcissistic, or just plain average ghosts often appear as human. On the other hand, the spirits of those who were corrupt in life are often corrupted in appearance as well.

Non-human entities of a certain class can change the way they present themselves at will, and often do so as a means to an end. Demonic or malevolent entities especially enjoy taking innocent forms; those of children or little old ladies. Lesser entities are just…stuck being ugly, for lack of a better way of putting it. The first ghost we captured is a manifestation of extreme gluttony, so he — if I can even assign such a thing a gender — is, in appearance, a green blob which is…mostly mouth, with just enough arm to be able to reach for food to shovel into said mouth. He reeks like bad breath and rotting food and leaves behind a thick green ectoplasm which smells just as rank.

So, overall — if a specter is capable of manifesting itself at all, its traits are often not entirely under its control. However, if it does have some level of control, its appearance and other traits are used as another means of more effectively haunting its surroundings.

[writingformeandyou]

a recap of what i’ve been up to

hey there guys. long time no talk. thats mostly my fault im going to be entirely honest here the TL;DR is when i got into my relationship back in late 2018 my creativity kinda tanked. Still i shouldnt have neglected this blog and left everything up to Amic. I really went outside and touched grass for a whole year and then the panoramic happened and that was wild. overall, I’m very sorry. for the longer read should be below the cut.

So, getting into the long story.

In 2019, i had spent nearly the entire year going out and enjoying life of being an adult with free time and a job. Theres not much there to explain. 2020, The Pandora’s Box, right when the pandemic hit a family member of mine as well as myself had caught COVID. That was a wild time in itself and back then we had no idea if anyone could make it if they were sent to the hospital. So when my family member got sent we had said our last goodbyes and could only hope that everything would come out okay. Being sick myself I was not allowed outside to give my family member a hug. Luckily they are okay but we both have long lasting effects from our time. The rest of 2020 went as one should suspect. 2021, Recovery, I spent most of this year truthfully trying to get back to where i was in 2019 but with limitations. It was about celebrating the life that we had and were grateful for another year. not much else happened personally in this year. 2022, Life, last year was spent actually living. with every precaution i could take i went out with friends and touched grass a whole bunch. lots of family issues were happening but in the grand scheme of things it was nothing to waste my time with. I actually had a lot of creativity in this year but didn’t really act on a lot of it.

Back in 2018 i had started playing FFXIV and didnt seriously start playing until like mid 2021. At that point i got serious and made lore for my WOL and wrote some snippets and such for her. It was mostly for myself and i didnt really share it with anyone else but like my friends who were also playing the game. Now im currently in Resident Evil hell and i blame only tiktok to be fair. also a close friend but thats on a different subject. my creativity had really dissipated for a while but now im feeling back in action but unfortunately i will not be taking any requests at the time but i might end up posting my stories on here. im currently in the process of writing a fic for RE. I have had one for ffxiv but i do not think ill sharing that one unless i seriously clean it up. I figured i should update you guys on why i was gone for so long and why Amic had taken over for a while before they left. which i am deeply sorry for i didnt realize that i had been gone for that long or had not had any inspiration for so long. funny that Resident Evil was the one fucking thing that brought me back to writing for fun again. well i hope that was satisfactory enough. im very sorry everyone, please understand thats why this blog had been dead for so long. until next time, Mod Vic

[computerpeople]

tw child abuse i didnt realize how fucked up this actually was until i wrote it all out LOL anyways sorry this is long. absolutely no requirement for anyone to read, but lms if you do since its long

a situation ive had really stuck in my head with this whole dad situation is the time that i had a minor seizure and instead of being worried that i came home from a date with my (at time physically abusive) ex, where we went to a baseball game with his dad and his dads gf for his birthay with massive blown out pupils, they screamed at me for hours about how im a useless waste of space and an evil child and how i clearly was going out and doing drugs with my boyfriend and lying to them about where ive been, and you know, im unaware of it but at the time i had just had a minor seizure and was freaking the fuck out because nothing was making sense and they were flashing flashlights into my eyes andf screaming at me and i couldn't make out anything they were saying until i started screaming at them to take me to the hospital and have me pee tested because i knew that i hadn't taken anything and if i WAS drugged (which i couldn't tell anymore because i was, again, post seizure and extremely freaked out) it wasnt of my own accord and that i would have BEEN drugged by someone else if i was

went to the hospital where i got screamed at in the car the entire time, and then screamed at in the waiting room. i just cried, man, i cried and cried and cried the entire time and kept screaming at them that i was innocent and that i hadn't taken anything because fucking obviously i hadn't taken anything. i was like 15 and severely heavily medicated and my boyfriend was a 14 year old theatre kid danganronpa fan, of course we werent taking hard fucking drugs. they eventually calmed down ocne the nurses started being around and started being overly nice to me, offering to get me star bucks and snacks from the drink places downstairs, mean while im like in shock and shaking violently and can't think coherently. and they explain to the nurses that im severely mentally unwell/struggle w some pretty severe ptsd so if im not able to communicate right thats why.

the nurse took me to the bathroom to pee in a cup and while we were walking to the bathroom she was like. "hey.... be honest with me, did you take anything?" and i shook my head and said no, that i told them to take me here to prove that i didn't. and she nodded and said "i knew you didnt" before letting me into the bathroom. i dont really remember the rest of that night bc it was mostly calm because obviously i peed clean and i was exhausted but i ended up getting home at 5am when the sun was already up, and they expected me to go to school after (got in trouble for going to bed and staying home). they never apologized though, they just kept insisting that trhey did all of this because they were terrified i had got drugged by someone at the ball game. they still haven't apologized.

[pwblogarchive]

November 2004

November 2, 2004

“Complaining Couldnt Touch This Kid.”

i would feel bad ever telling anyone what to do. i have thought for months what i would say or how i should act- ive thought and thought. i don’t like kerry or bush (i like kerry alot more than bush though). i am going to vote for john kerry. i won’t beg you or tell you to do anything. but if you are of voting age and are in a swing state. please think hard and make the choice that fits you best.

peter

November 3, 2004

your princess is in another castle

happyhalloween

November 3, 2004

5:47 pm

booyah

November 4, 2004

“brothers and sisters.”

the smell of fall. leaves. the weakerthans show- "the sidewalks watching me think about you". both ewok movies back to back. peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. the things they write about me versus how it really goes. the book being in my hands- how we all feel in our skin. sometimes when you're caught you just gotta throw your hands up and confess. the way you smile when you say his name like you never do with me. new songs.

peterpumpkineater

November 7, 2004

“things that mean other things always don't mean a damn thing in the scheme of things”

being home is always a rollercoaster for me. things are good, then ok, then pretty bad, then good, then bad again (not always in that order). im getting by more latley on a pair of really thick glasses and no faith in human beings. as of now i have a pro-tools situation and have been recording things, mostly just making up stuff on the go and seeing how it turns out. so far its fun. ive had a lot of my mind as of latley, just how there's so much good that turns straight to bad and im always like this the night before i leave. certain things are constant struggles for me but i keep fighting them and i dont know why sometimes when i end up feeling wrecked, but i guess my brain is trying to tell me that the few struggles i take on are worth fighting. i dunno anymore. i hope so though, because no one should feel unhappy like i do at a time like this. im not unhappy with my life, just unhappy with an aspect of it. otherwise things are pretty ok. i took my dog ben on a walk today and he was running around a lot. i picked him up a few times though he is getting far too large for that and will so be too heavy. i saw some of my friends today, not everyone that i wanted to or everyone as long as i would like to. but the people i spent my time with were more than worthy of it. the one thing that bugs me about going away for long periods of time is when i get home i feel like everything has changed around me to a degree where i cant keep up. like im a step behind every time i get home. eh, late night thoughts.

November 11, 2004

“drop it like its hot”

The day spent dreading flying. I am scared to fly for some reason. Make it to las vegas. Our flight to l.a. Was cancelled. Drove from vegas to l.a. Began working on the songs. Me and patrick are sharing an apartment here, so are joe and andy. Its like old times. The weather is amazing. There are so many good shows here. Went to over it. Gonna try and see morrissey in a couple of days. Hung out with my friend kate from the fight. She's rad. We went up on muholand drive and saw the entire city. It made me feel like I couldn't breathe. She says the word "vitamins" funny cause she's british. She also say the word "safe" a lot and calls sneakers trainers. Their record comes out next week. I command you to buy it. I miss home but this record is going to be worth it. I promise. Its going to make you think about things in a new way.

Sorry for the boring journal entry. I realize I didn't get the closure I wanted from take this to your grave. This record will have the most brutally honest words I have ever written.

That's all. Lets get hitched and grow old.

Peterpan

November 14, 2004

“I've got a dark alley and a bad idea that says you should shut your fucking mouth”

We've got about 23 songs right now. Were gonna cut it down and figure them out. Its strange staying in one place for so long. If you're watching tv tommorrow- we snuck some tickets for the american music awards- I'm sure well be like a million rows back but well try to start a fight or spill a drink on someone famous on camera so you can get a laugh. I'm sure they'll never let us stop by again...

Peterpumpkineater

November 15, 2004

“finally an entry that doesnt involve joe's general tso's chicken”

the AMAs were less than interesting as i am sure anyone who watched knows. ana nicole smith was fucking faded as hell. it was like watching a blondehaired trainwreck. walked onto the red carpet by accident but we are so unfamous that we didn't even get in trouble. got to eat good food and people watch at stupid parties. hung out with my buddy chad and some kids. watched kanye west with like thirty other people- kanye west is amazing. im getting pretty sleepy. maybe ill think of something better in the morning.

im

just

out

of

chances

p

November 15, 2004

we only do it for the attention.

I'm just a broken emo record.

Time to retreat to other areas.

You know where to find. Or maybe you don't.

me and patrick are gonna go cry and hold hands.

Wink. Smile.

Peter

November 17, 2004

4:16 pm

“after the party theres the hotel lobby”

yeahyeahyeah. we're becoming so l.a. psyche! anyway. i dont have much to say except the weather is radical here. after our chicago metro show on dec 29- we're gonna have an after party and prescreen the release the bats dvd- maybe youll hear about it and stop by. youll laugh. youll cry.

laterskater

November 24, 2004

“its too bad you only look so goddamned beautiful when you're crying your eyes out”

i am going to do a better update soon. but just to say- the recording is coming along. andy is almost done with drums. his hair is so flowing. like a pony. nyc was amazing as usual. we have some suprises coming up. (if you don't like suprises than you also probably don't like saturdays, palm trees, puppies, ice cream, first kisses, etc). fuse was fun. thanks for coming out and hanging out, i felt pretty dorky and was a glad there were some people there. im sorry i had to leave right from there to my plane, so i am sorry i couldn't stick around and hang out. we'll be there all day on dec. 26th to make up for it. also, it was definitely weird being anywhere with out the rest of the band so don't expect too much of that. we are attatched at the hip.

you can get "the boy with the thorn in his side" at select hottopic's starting this week. if yours doesn't have it, ask them to order it for you.

more later. peter

oh yeah to the girl who gave me the signed morrissey picture and jetted before i could thank, THANK YOU.

November 26, 2004

their eyes are like pills. its funny. the blue ones take to you down. the brown ones pick you up. it doesn't even make a whole lot of sense looking back on it now. there are a couple of sets of eyes that are like bookmarks in life. they are there to mark the chapters. highlights so you pay attention to the changes. dogeared pages. the way she looked at me the first time- all the blood ran out of me. with the biggest eyes. that trusted and believed and dreamed and hoped and lived. so i blinked. i faked like i couldnt tell. i was always so goddamned scared to see my own flaws reflected on them. and i cant count the times i crushed them. and you realize that they will never look up at you the same.

i cant blame you for giving up on me.

join the club.

i have a lifetime membership.

- petey

November 28, 2004

“professor murder”

ok so my new shoes are kind of bad looking. but i like them. both are dunks. one are lowtops and pretty much are bears colors, the others are high tops and are white and blue. i own way more than 5 bad pairs of shoes. i own about 11 that only i enjoy and are not here to impress anyone. they know i love them and i let them know that at least once a day. maybe ill take a group picture of them for you if i get around to it. what i really wanted to say is im sorry i got into xbox so late, but i just wanted everyone to know that just because i started play knights of the old republic 4 days ago doesn't mean i haven't almost beaten it yet. because im just that close. and i made sure to buy the new lord of the rings rpg for such cases where i will need a new video game. but when kotor2 comes out, i will be learning so many force powers you'll wish the force was with you too. but its not. its mostly with me. my dog gets to have some too cause he can jump really high and can still be picked up even though he is teetering on 70 pounds at only 5 months. good job ben! you're growing up! he's probably more a dark jedi because he still nips a little and thinks it's real cool to pee when he gets excited. sorry ben, not cool my friend. just funny. anyhoo, its been a while since ive given a list of what i currently enjoy. here is such a list:

music:

owen-i do perceive

aloha-here comes everyone

pig destroyer-terrifyer

brian wilson-smile

interpol-antics

isis-panopticon

tusk-tree of no return

frank zappa-broadway the hard way

video games:

star wars knights of the old republic-xbox

lord of the rings the third age-ps2

star wars jedi academy II-xbox

grand theft auto san andreas-ps2

dvds:

aqua teen season 3

home movies season 1

arrested development season 1

star wars 2: clone wars

tv:

tom goes to the mayor

internet:

yahoo mail

food:

chicken in most any form

[elysianslove]

Please wrote more surrogate fics please . could I request one with SakuAtsu or could you just start a series on these. If you'd me comfortable with that. That on IwaOi surrogate fic brought me so much joy. I can't even describe it.

oh my goodness i’d love to!!! it makes me so happy knowing you liked it cause like,,, idk why it’s just special to me :) also im so glad you asked for sakuatsu bc these two ships are basically my favorite jhfgbsj. and yesyes i’d love to have a mini series with like little scenarios of each ship <333

this was insanely long. like insanely. 

content warning; artificial insemination, pregnancy, haikyuu manga spoilers, gay people being happy idk 

being iwaoi’s surrogate 

BEING SAKUATSU’S SURROGATE 

↬ it took forever to even get them together, so with a duo as indecisive as them, it’s imaginable how long the decision to raise a child together took. it took a long, long while for that transition from enemies to lovers to be final, and even then, they hadn’t realized how serious their relationship was until they were off getting married and then suddenly wanting a child? 

↬ it was something atsumu brought up out of the blue, just casually as they sat side by side on the couch. “wouldn’t it be nice if we raised a child together?” and it stuck with sakusa ever since. he didn’t know why he was obsessively thinking about it as much, but it’s all he could think about. literally. anytime he so much as thought about atsumu with a child, and a child of their own too, his stomach did a thousand and one flips. sakusa was never the biggest fan of children, and he knew that neither was atsumu. but, this would be different, wouldn’t it? Still, he tried to remind himself of the cons; they were pro-athletes, they didn’t have time, they didn’t understand the weight of the responsibility, were they even ready for something like that? somedays it was too tiring to take care of themselves, of each other. were they ready to be responsible for a whole life, someone dependent entirely on them? it seemed too— unrealistic. like something he could only hope to dream about, and just dream about.

↬ until he thought of atsumu with a little kid, a spit image of either one of them, sitting on his lap, giggling and laughing and squealing in glee. and so he decided, there will always be cons, he just has to see if the pros outweighed them. and honestly, they did. they were pro-athletes, sure, but that also meant they were financially stable, and could provide for a child, properly. they were mature now, knew each other very well, and had adapted to living with one another. they had family and friends all around. the kid would for sure grow up loved and cared for, and him and atsumu would add another person to their family. it really seemed like a dream, but this time, an attainable one.

↬ so as he ate dinner with his lover, he blurted out, “let’s raise a child together,” and atsumu honest to god choked on his food. he asked sakusa if he was serious, if he meant it, if this was real, and sakusa’s answer was yes to every single one of his question. yes, he was serious; yes, he meant it; yes, this was real. as real as can be.

↬ they both already knew they wanted a surrogate, and it didn’t matter who was the father. so long as the child was theirs.

↬ finding a surrogate was, well, a pain, to put it into perspective. sakusa was so picky about the “requirements,” if you will, and atsumu was suspicious of every single woman, it was kind of ridiculous really. he just “didn’t trust that they wouldn’t run away with the baby!” in his words. atsumu suggested sakusa’s older sister, which seemed perfect in his head, but sakusa refused, claiming it was 1. extremely weird, and 2. he doubted she’d say yes, with her own life to handle.

↬ and it finally, finally, came to atsumu: he could always just ask, well, you. he had met you during his college years, and since then, he’d been coincidentally crossing paths with you ever since then, and you’d even managed their msby jackals team at some point. it was weirdly ironic how he’s coming back to you, kind of like fate.

↬ so he suggested it to sakusa, and for once, the latter didn’t really have any way to object, except, “what if this inconveniences her?” other than that, you were the perfect candidate. they knew you well, trusted you, knew they could rely on you. and atsumu was sure you wouldn’t run with the baby. with regards to the inconvenience part, well, they could always just deal with that when the time came.

↬ they invited you over for some breakfast two days later, after they’d thought about it properly, endlessly, and figured you were their best option. it was weird seeing them so nervous when you first arrived, like they were breaking up with you or something. atsumu barely ate with how nauseous he felt, and sakusa spent the entire time watching you eat instead, hands fidgeting and legs shaking. it was really weird, but you didn’t bring it up, letting them take their own time to tell you whatever it was they wanted to tell you, because obviously, they clearly had something to say.

↬ after breakfast, you sat in their living room, just watching the tv quietly, until sakusa offered to get you some water. you weren’t really thirsty, but you agreed anyways, unsurprised to see atsumu rise from his own seat a minute later with a, “be right back,” as he headed to the kitchen. you could hear them bickering and whisper-yelling, and if you weren’t starting to grow as nervous as they were, you would’ve had it in you to laugh. they returned looking like they were bearing the most daunting of news, sitting down on the couch perpendicular to you. atsumu’s hands were sweaty and intertwined tightly together, while sakusa tried to remain as composed as possible. it seemed like the dark haired man would speak up, finally, parting his mouth with a deep breath.

↬ but it’s atsumu that blurts out, “please have my baby!— our baby. please have our baby.”

↬ honestly, your first response was to laugh, in disbelief, as you clutch your glass of water. but then you see their faces — god they looked so goddamn scared — and you realized that, they were really serious. they really wanted you to carry their baby for them. holy shit?—

↬ you were mostly speechless after that, stuttering as you ask them to please explain, you’re honored but are they are, have they thought about this? properly? in depth?

↬ to your surprise, they really knew what they were doing. they’d done their research, and thought about a million other options before deciding that you were the best one. they also repeatedly told you that you didn’t have to do this, and that they didn’t want to guilt-trip you into doing it either. they wanted you to say yes only if you yourself wanted to say yes, and if this wouldn’t negatively affect you or halt your life in any way. you were the one that was going to be carrying the baby anyways, weren’t you? at the end of the day, this was all about you.

↬ you asked them for time to think about it, and reminded them that it wasn’t a no. you just wanted to make sure you were making the right decision whichever that ended up being. a few days later, you call them, asking them to meet up one way or another, and atsumu’s even more nervous than he was asking you; not even sakusa’s gentle lips to his temple or large hands soothingly rubbing at his back or his kind words could help him. sakusa himself was insanely anxious. in his head, it seemed like your ‘no,’ would finalize everything. that it would really mean no hope in having a child of their own, their very own.

↬ you invite them over to your home, and the kettle is already boiling when they arrive. you make them tea and make small talk if only to delay the inevitable. but, to each of their surprises, you take a deep breath and say, “i’d be honored to carry your baby for you,” with the brightest, warmest smile. sakusa has to bite his inner cheek to will himself to not cry, because he can’t believe you said yes. you agreed. you’re going to carry their baby. him and atsumu were having a baby.

↬ atsumu doesn’t stop himself from throwing his arms around you, collapsing on top of you in tight hug that you kind of can’t breathe, but you let him, and you laugh when he thanks you for saying yes, that he’ll “be forever in your debt.”

↬ it’s the happiest you’ve seen either of them.

↬ when you’re done with the process of insemination (of course, atsumu does joke that the three of you should go the natural way and have a threesome, to which he earns a smack from his lover and a smack from you, at the same time), the three of you just have to wait, really. it’s the longest period of waiting you’ve ever had to do, but you try to be patient, as patient as you can be. when you wake up one morning and throw up, you look at your period tracking app to see if maybe you were pms’ing. except, you weren’t. you were late. like a good three weeks late.

↬ immediately, you’re booking a doctor’s appointment. you wait to tell sakusa and atsumu after confirming your suspicions, because you don’t want to raise their hopes up for nothing. they’ve already been swimming in a pool of doubts ever since the insemination, calling you everyday to check up on you and ask for any progress. when the doctor confirms your pregnancy — holy shit you were pregnant — the first thing you do is go over to their house. you know it’s not the best idea to show up unannounced, but with how long they’ve been waiting, and how much they’ve been wanting this, the more and more you fed into it, you couldn’t wait any longer to tell them. you arrive, and the moment sakusa opens the door for you, you gasp out, “i’m pregnant.”

↬ sakusa’s quite literally frozen in shock, his mouth pressed in a thin line with eyes wide open, while atsumu walks over and goes, “oh hey,” in greeting before noticing sakusa’s face and just ???? “what’s going on?”

↬ “i’m pregnant.”

↬ “you’re what?”

↬ you show them with tears stinging your eyes the results of the test you’d taken at the doctor’s, and atsumu grips the report so tightly, like it’ll disappear if it slips only slightly from his hands. sakusa’s still in shock, trying to process everything. it takes him a good while before he can function properly again.

↬ the pregnancy itself is a lot smoother than you’d imagined. iwaizumi, as their athletic trainer, although not well versed with pregnancy, knew a lot about health and taking care of yourself in general, so he made sure you were always eating right and healthy. he even accompanied you once when sakusa and atsumu couldn’t, to the doctor, and made sure to ask him specifically what you should and shouldn’t be eating. all of the olympic/national team are more excited than anything. they’re insanely protective over you, and always pamper and care for you you when they can, whether that be back/neck/shoulder massages or giving you their food when they notice you eyeing it or letting you lean entirely on any of them for support as you walk. granted, they do make fun of you, especially the bigger your stomach got, but they mean well, really. suna once made fun of you and, because of the hormones, and because he was genuinely just mean, you started to cry. since then, suna swore off bullying you, at least until you gave birth.

↬ osamu is beyond ecstatic to become an uncle. he’s so excited it makes atsumu incredibly emotional. he goes with his brother on trips to ikea to buy a crib and gifts him an insane amount of baby clothes and always begins a conversation with, “how’s the baby?” every time you’re around, osamu’s hand can be found resting on your stomach, soothingly rubbing, excitedly grinning when he feels a kick. he is just so happy for his brother, he could cry.

↬ you ask them if they want a gender reveal when you find out or to keep it until the delivery of the baby, but they’re both insanely impatient (even though sakusa does try to convince atsumu to wait because it’ll be exciting, he himself isn’t even that convinced of that and they just ask you to tell them). with the help of osamu and his and atsumu’s parents, you organize a gender reveal party. the moment he sees the pink smoke, atsumu cheers so loudly it makes you laugh till your stomach hurt. sakusa’s grinning wider than you’ve ever seen him, grabbing atsumu’s face and kissing him, before pulling you into a tight hug. it’s literally the cutest thing ever, everyone just cheering loudly around you and celebrating with you.

↬ when you go into labor, you’re with neither of them, but with osamu, aran, and kita. they were staying the night at a hotel since they had training away from where they lived, and you were spending the night at osamu’s because the fathers of your baby really didn’t want you to be alone so close to your due date, and who better than osamu? your water didn’t break, but you kept having contractions. you were brushing it off as normal pain at the start, but they started to get worse, and closer together in time. kita, because he’s kita, had been keeping track, and told you how far apart your contractions were. to which you went, “contractions?!”

↬ aran’s calling sakusa and atsumu as kita grabs your bag as osamu grabs his keys and helps you to his car. you really couldn’t have been around a better set of men, because they were perfectly composed the whole time, helping you breathe and stay calm by staying calm themselves, reassuring you that you didn’t need to worry and that you will get to the hospital in time. they did flinch every time you screamed or cried out in pain, but aran held your hand the entire drive there, and kita guided you to steadying yourself as osamu drove as fast as he could.

↬ the issue was with sakusa and atsumu. to say they were freaking out would be an understatement. they were positively losing it. atsumu’s anxiety was louder than sakusa’s, but the latter’s was clear as ever on his pale skin and clammy hands. they were so annoying in the delivery room, literally faring worse off than you, who was pushing a whole baby out of her body. when you finally gave birth to a healthy baby girl, atsumu sobbed and sakusa cried in his hands, so maybe it was alright after all.

↬ they literally couldn’t believe their eyes when the nurse handed you the baby and placed her on your chest. she was so, so tiny, so beautiful, and theirs. honestly, you couldn’t hold back your own tears at the sight of her, and at their reaction to her. you held her in your arms as they thanked you, over and over and over again, for the biggest blessing they could ever receive.

↬ despite the fact that you were simply their surrogate, sakusa and atsumu knew they couldn’t just separate you and your baby, and neither could they just take her home all of a sudden. so for the first few months, you stayed in their guest room, but the baby slept in her own room. it was more difficult than you expected it to be when you were leaving her to go back to your own home, but they promised you repeatedly that they’re not really taking her away. it wasn’t as if you couldn’t visit at any time you wanted to come visit her. but at the end of the day, you knew what you had been signing up for, and that she was their daughter.

↬ she grows up to be a gorgeous woman. she’s interested in volleyball, sure, she’d been raised with volleyball players everywhere around her, but it’s not her immediate passion. atsumu thought he’d be more upset about that than he actually was, because he found out that it didn’t matter at all what she wanted to do. hell, if she wanted to do nothing at all and stay home forever with them, he was 100% on board with that. whatever made her happy and healthy, he was okay with. she grows up to be really close and really comfortable with both of her fathers, and they make sure with every passing day that no matter what, she can always come to them. and she does, about every little thing. and each and every time, they listen and advice and guide her properly. a s parents, they’re a perfect balance of strict and lenient. they set and raise her to never cross those boundaries, but otherwise they give her complete freedom. they respect her privacy, her decisions, everything.

↬ there was a day when she came back home from school, and they had taken a biology class for kids, where a teacher had explained periods to them. obviously, as curious as ever, she’d asked her dads about it, because she didn’t really get it. she wanted to know the how’s and the why’s and the what’s and the when’s. with every passing second atsumu had felt his lifespan shorten. eventually he suggested they call you, who she knew as her ‘aunt’ for the time being, since you were a woman and nobody would really explain it better than you. when she did get her period eventually, and had to sheepishly and shyly ask her dads to go to the store for her because she needed, um, supplies, atsumu lost it. sakusa had to try and calm him down all while laughing as he got ready to go to the store for her, because the drama of miya atsumu never gets old. he just couldn’t believe she was already getting her period. what the hell! what the actual hell!

↬ of course, he proceeded to embarrass her by telling osamu, telling sakusa’s parents, telling his parents. not cool :(

↬ when she was old enough, especially to understand the concept of being a surrogate (oh my god the sex talk was a whole other insufferable thing), they told her about you, and that you were actually her biological mother and not just an ‘auntie.’ she tried to be angry at them for keeping it from her, but she was honestly more excited about finding out than anything. it brought the two of you closer together, and for the next mother’s day, she organized a whole brunch for you, her and her dads, got you a gift, flowers, everything. yeah, you did cry.

↬ you genuinely have never been more satisfied and thankful for a decision like this one, ever, especially because of how much of a blessing the outcome had been.

can u tell this isn’t my first time thinking about this. ever since i posted the iwaoi one i’ve been wanting to do a sakuatsu one, but i didn’t really know whether anyone had enjoyed that or would want more, so thank you for sending in this ask!! love u all mwah <3 

[superhero--imagines]

Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here! / Part 11 Here! / Part 12 Here! / Part 13 Here! / Part 14 Here! / Part 15 Here! / Part 16 Here! / Part 17 Here! / Part 18 Here! / Part 19 Here! < This is Part 20!>

Donate to Move to Higher Ground HERE!

A/N: There’s not going to be an update on Wednesday (it’s the day after my birthday and I’m going to go cry at the space station) lol. The next two parts will be like - alternative timeline/pov/intermission posts. Which will just be to add some depth to the story I guess. Stay safe! See you next Saturday!

* “Get out”

* You can’t have been parked more than five minutes before Jessica prys the driver side door open from the outside

* You’re hunched over the binder in your lap, hurriedly scrawling answers onto the worksheet

* Edward just sighs, moving to get out of the car

* “Wait-“

* You stop him by placing your hand on his shoulder

* Edward grins, so these are boyfriend privileges huh?

* You’re going to pick him over your human friends. Well he would be lying-

* “Give me the answer to the last question before you go.”

* Edward deflates

* Guess somethings don’t change.

* “It’s sin(x) equals 18”

* You nod, quickly writing down the answer

* “Thanks Edward.” You mumble learning over to press a chaste kiss to his cheek

* “Now get out”

* He stands outside the jeep a goofy grin on his face, a hand touching the place your lips were on his cheek

* Well at least some things change

* You don’t miss Jessica’s gaze on you as you put your binder into your backpack

* “So... what do you want to talk about Jess?”

* You don’t miss the incredulous look she gives you

* “So about Edward then”

* “Yeah, no duh”

* You let out a deep sigh

* “Where do you want me to start?”

* How far back does this story even go?

* Probably when you saw him that first time in Denali

* His angular face, and those deep amber eyes

* And those butterflies in your stomach

* “You can start with what happened after you guys left the party!”

* So you’re going to have to fast forward a bit

* “Well he was mad because-you know two against one- if it was anyone else it would have been a traumatic experience waiting to happen”

* She nods, thinking you’re talking about you

* You’re talking about something transitive happening to those boys

* For those boys if they tried something with you that is

* You were pretty far gone, you might have actually killed them if Edward hadn’t come to get you

* Not out of anger, just negligence

* At the very best they might have cried if you weren’t able to control your emotions

* “And then after - we were arguing- and then it was just happening”

* “You guys had s*x?”

* You sputter

* “Geez no! We were kissing, get your mind out of the gutter Jess.”

* “Well I don’t know (Y/N/N), he’s been pinning after you since freshman year a kiss just seems anticlimactic all things considered ”

* Besides you guys have this vibe around you-

* Like a sort of intimacy or something-

* You’ve both always had a sort of closeness.

* Like it was the two of you in one world, and then everyone else in another

* But now there’s a physical closeness to you both

* The kind of vibe people who are sleeping together usually give off.

* She saw it when you were together at the aquarium

* “Nah that’s impossible” you let out a long sigh

* “I’m pretty sure he wants to wait until marriage”

* Jessica sputters at that

* “M-marriage? Holy crap (Y/N)-“

* You nod, it’s such an antiquated notion.

* Especially considering you’re both technically dead

* Honestly, what could be more awkward than a couple of virgins fumbling around in the dark for a few hours on their wedding night?

* “He wants to marry you?!?”

* Oh

* Yeah that would be the normal thing to be concerned about

* “I’m not really sure” you scratch the back of your head

* “You’re my soul mate”

* He had said it so causally, like he was talking about gravity or the weather

* Like it was a universal fact

* The words make your stomach flutter

* Ugh you don’t have time to think about this

* “Well that’s what happened, and now Carlisle is always crying in the house and Esme is already planning weddings. Now come on we’re going to be late for class”

* You get out of the car before Jess can get a word in edgewise

* So this is really happening

* She sighs

* Well she’s be lying if she said she didn’t see this coming

* She knows there’s a lot of people competing for your affection

* Hell even Conner dropped his f*ck boy tendencies for you

* But Edward is the only one who looks at you, and only you

* Jessica’s guilty of it too, she’ll admit that

* You’re her first choice, don’t get her wrong, but if you don’t return her affections

* Well that’s fine, she’ll just date Mike, or Conner, or Bella or whoever

* It’s the same for the rest of them

* Conner will be bummed when he finds out-

* Mostly because he can’t believe he dropped his other side pieces

* But he’ll get over it

* Just like Mike did

* But Edward-

* There’s no one other than you for him

* She see’s it in the way he looks at you.

* If it’s not you, it’s just not any good

* So he’ll wait, maybe even his entire life, until you’re ready to love him back

* A small smile twitches on her face

* She’d be lying if she said she wasn’t happy for you

* “I wonder if anyone will ever love me like that” she mumbles to herself, right before flinching in surprise when you swing the passenger door open

* “Oh my god you scared me!”

* “I scared you?!? Jess this is my car, how am I supposed to lock it if you’re sitting inside?”

* “Oh right”

* You make it to class by the skin of your teeth, taking you seat between Edward and Alice in English

* “So what did you two talk about?” Edward whispers with a small smile while the teacher calls roll

* You roll your eyes

* “Like you don’t know”

* He has a sly smile on his face and you’re not sure why

* Alice starts obviously stifling laughter beside you

* Rude but okay

* Edward leans close to you, so close his lips are only a centimeter away from your ear

* Does he mind?

* Maybe he’s immune to sexual feelings, but being that close is doing things to you

* “I’m actually not waiting for marriage by the way”

* You can practically feel the grin on his face

* You look up to him, your golden eyes meeting his

* You were right he is smiling

* His smile takes a mischievous turn, and you feel his hand slide onto your thigh and give a teasing squeeze

* “Didn’t want you to have any misconceptions” he says with the same sly grin as he removes his hand from your leg and leans back in his chair

* Ah

* So that’s why Alice was laughing

* (Y/N). Exe is broken

Bonus:

* “Hey”

* Bella looks up to see the Jessica standing by her locker as she pulls her books out

* “Oh hey, did you get to talk to them?”

* “Um yeah, it’s about what we were thinking.”

* Bella nods, if she’s sad she’s not showing it.

* “It’s good that they’re together. He loves them a lot, I’m sure Edward will treat them right”

* Jessica nods, Edward does love you a lot.

* She watches Bella try to cram books into her bag

* She is kinda pretty now that she looks at her, in that angular face- snow white kinda way

* She’s no (Y/N)

* And she’s no Mike

* “Hey did you finish the trig homework? I was having tr-“

* But maybe-

* “Hey, Angela and I are going dress shopping in port a, do you want to come with?”

* Maybe they can be friends

* They both liked the same person, so they’ve already got something in common

* Bella looks at the blonde

* To be honest, she’s been holding everyone here at a distance

* In a few years she won’t see any of these people ever again, there’s no need to get attached

* Not after what happened in Arizona

* But still-

* “Yeah, that sounds like fun.”

* Guess she never learns

Tags:  @moonlights27​ @thebluetint​ @the100thtwilight​ @awesomebooklover17​ @oneofthepotterheads​ @smileygirl08​ @imdoingathingmom​ @iconicgguk​ @yrawn​ @alyciaswhore​ @little-horror-show​ @wicked-watering-can​ @lazydreamers​ @ xxxmuxxx @ideas-for-you-to-adopt​​​ @poisoinedhope @maryleigh8796​​ @moose-squirrel-asstiel​​ @hotmessgoodness​ @jaimewho​ @corabmarie​ @what-am-i-doing10​ @alluring-venus​ @imdoingathingmom @anotheryooniverse​ @im-tired-not-sleepy​ @emmettcullenisahimbo​ @my-super-musical-life​ @smolvampiregirl​ @it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream​ @mihikaahujaaa @werewolflover3252​ @teenagezombiekryptonite @shynz​ @reclusive-chicken-nugget​ @monkeyluver4546 @wonhomarshmallow​ @bwbatta @bubblyabs​ @thatwaspossesion​

[darthwheezely]

okay im backkkkk 💌 anything kinda angsty for fred pls (like a break up but theres a bit of making up at the end pls

resentment and reconciliation- f.w. hcs

Warnings: this one kinda hurt to write I’m ngl, I love you Jess but DAMN - cussing probably, mentions of slut shaming, actual smut, a lOT OF ANGST, hateful!fred

THIS WILL BE SO UNGODLY LONG THIS IS BASICALLY A PSUEDO ONE SHOT

people that might like this(?): @whiz-bangs78 @vogueweasley @theweasleyslut @loony-loopy-lupinn @lupinsclassroom @vivianweasley @oh-for-merlins-sake @kitwalker02 @tatesimper @gcdric @slytherinsunrise @lumosandnoxwriting

you and Fred were friends...

...simply friends

yep

mhm

only friends

friends that liked to casually dominate each other multiple times a week

sometimes multiple times a day

but regardless of your entirely messy relationship, you were best friends

...weren’t you?

“Fuck, Y/N, you’re so goddamn tight me,” Fred hissed as he was pounding inside of you, determined to release some kind of frustration from seeing you with George for the whole day when you both knew you had really just wanted to spend the day with Fred. Right?

“Freddie, you feel so good” you said airily as he hiked up one of your legs onto one of his shoulders.

“Yeah, princess? You like the way I fill you up so good, make you fucking mine?” When you moaned in response he threw your other leg onto the opposite shoulder, determined to show you just how much you were his, and what that meant for him. He had been watching you for months pretend nothing was happening outside this room, and regardless if you knew it or not, it had been killing him the day he agreed to your rendezvous the first time.

“Yes, Freddie, fuck, yes”

“Gonna come for me, sweet girl?”

“God, yes, Fred-“ and with a harsh thrust to your g-spot you clenched around him tightly, your body releasing onto him in a massive wave. He put his free hand that didn’t have your arms pinned above you to your clit, determined to have you as overstimulated as possible.

“Fred, please-“ you whined vehemently at his rough touch.

“I’m coming baby, I’m right here” and with a final pound he had smoothed your walls with him, the throbbing finally subsiding. He rolled his hips slowly to ride out his high, and he then pulled out, falling to your side and pulling you into his arms. He could feel your heart pounding as your breasts heaved against him, desperate for air flow where he had rid you of it all.

“We haven’t held each other like this in a while, Freddie...it’s...it’s really nice.” You whispered against his bare chest, pressing a kiss or two there. He nodded and buried his mouth in your hair, fluttering his eyes.

“I promise I’ll take every opportunity to hold you, okay?”

that was tuesday

let’s skip to Thursday morning

you had only told one other person about your complicated relationship with Fred, and that was Hannah Abbot

you trusted her, you saw her as your BEST friend

but unfortunately, good ol’ hannah didn’t really feel the same

she had it out for you when Roger Davies had confessed he had a crush on you at the Yule Ball, kissed you even, against your consent

see, he was Hannah’s date

and she didn’t like that very much

to top it allllll off?

she had been casually crushing on Fred ever since she had her heart broken by Roger

so now here you all were, seventh year and you assumed as per usual that everything was fine

when clearly, unbeknownst to you

this bitch saw you six feet under

so Hannah did what she knew would hurt you the most

she told Roger :)

“Please he’s absolutely balls deep in love with her, but poor thing doesn’t know she’s using him for a roll in the sack.” Said Hannah, filing her nails in the courtyard. Roger looked at her absolutely dumbfounded.

“No, Y/N, isnt like that. And besides, Fred’s a good mate of mine and...She just wouldn’t do that to him. Feelings or not, she’s not one to use people.” He shook his head starting to get up from the tree he’d been leaning on.

“Well, she used you, didn’t she?” She purred demurely. He turned to look at her, jaw clenched.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He gritted out.

“She’s making him her personal whore, exactly like she did when she rejected you at the Ball...I mean...cmon, Rog. Don’t people deserve to know who she really is?”

everyone had heard the next day how Y/N was fucking Fred Weasley like an Olympic sport

and how he wasn’t the one coming out on top for the first time

at first he didn’t know what he did when he walked into the Great Hall to stares and whispers

George had tried to get him to go back to bed so he could bring him food

but fred demanded answers

and when he found out what it was

...he was crushed

You walked into the cascading staircase, bounding up the stairs. It was Thursday night, you and Fred’s night to be alone while George and Lee would be hanging out. You walked into the room to see Fred, throwing things onto his bed and looking angry and...hurt?

“Fred, what-what is all this?” He didn’t look at you, just continued to pick stuff up off the floor, and got one of your bras. He threw it at you.

“It’s all your shit, Y/N. Might as well help since this is the last time you’ll ever be in my room. Or around me again quite frankly.” He started to look down again and keep working but he heard you whimper and his eyes flashed up to yours. He started to laugh harshly. “Oh my god, stop.” He rolled his eyes and threw his arms out. “You got what you wanted from me didn’t you, Y/N? Quick shag and no feelings and knowing you had an entire fucking human being completely and utterly devoted to you with, what did Ron say? ‘Half the commitment’?” He smiled at you but it was one with rage, with tears pooling at his eyes, pain emitting off his body in hot waves. He didn’t even know he was shouting.

“I mean, Jesus, I’m in love with you and you got to go on and-and fuck whoever you want because guess what at the end of the day you get to tell everyone that Fred fucking Weasley is your own personal whore and would do anything for you and that just got you where you wanted it didn’t it? Didn’t it?” He had stopped yelling, his heart pounding as he took in the sight of you fully in tears now, flinching at him quietly. He felt immediately then like he was going to throw up, something wasn’t right, you usually were so fiery and assertive and here you were looking like a dog that got kicked repeatedly. He swallowed thickly. “Get your stuff and get the fuck out I can’t stand the sight of you.”

Without looking at him you reached onto his bed and grabbed everything you could carry, and swiftly left the room. Everyone in the Gryffindor common room, except George, looking at you with pure unbridled disdain.

George was the only it seemed, that cared about you at this time for the next couple weeks

He didn’t tell Fred, but it had been George that had been sneaking up food to you in your dorm room

It had been George that had sent you little notes in class that said things like

I love you, Y/N. I believe in you, okay?

He even visited your dorm one day when you couldn’t move so much as one leg off your bed, and he caught you then, while you were sobbing about the loss of Fred and yourself and he held you and put you back in bed

and waited until you fell back asleep and moved the hair out of your face

he needed to tell Fred the truth

meanwhile, Fred was floundering

he had fallen back into his coping mechanism of sex and violence, mostly the first one

he had started hooking up with virtually everyone in his year that he’d ever rejected

after all - fred was labeled as a slut so why not act like one

if there was anything Fred was good at, it was being loud

in bed it had never been an issue - in fact, it was a talent now, yeah?

he’d been hearing it around school for weeks now

how easy he was

how much he would do to get in a girl’s pants

how he dipped his wick in anything that moved

anything and everything

he got it from girls

“c’mon freddie can i take a ride just once”

to the guys

“Oi freddie, you let your mates hit it for free too?”

if it were from a guy he’d usually swing a punch

or 12

he’d gotten in his most fights that he ever had in any of his years at hogwarts

but then Georgie came along:

George had waited on Fred’s bed, as his twin was in the shower. Lucky for Fred, George had been able to trace Roger’s little dip in the gossip system all the way back to Hannah Abbott, who everyone knew was bullshit, and had decided to let his brother know exactly what kind of a supreme asshat he was being to their best friend (and the love of Fred’s life, let’s be super honest.)

“Georgie, what the hell are you doing-”

“About to give you the whip cracking of your life, dear brother.” George swung his legs off the bed as Fred continued to dry his hair in the mirror, rolling his eyes.

“Is this about the last girl I had by? We didn’t fuck on your bed if that’s what you’re so worried about.” Fred quipped and George took everything in his power to not bitch slap the hell out of his older twin. George clenched his jaw and rolled it.

“You fucked up, Freddie.” He said quietly. Fred turned slowly to look at him. “Excuse me?”. “You. Fucked. Up.” George said a bit louder. “Y/N got played. By Hannah Abbott and Roger Davies. She’s had a crush on you this whole time, you absolute dumb piece of shit.” And then George did push Fred then backwards onto the bathroom wall, but he was too dumbfounded by the usually sensible twin’s behavior to do anything back.

“That’s-I don’t understand-“

“Oh my god, Fred. Hannah’s been in love with for ages, she lied. To everyone. Roger did too, he’s wanted to get with Y/N since day 1 you know that just as well as I do.” Fred tightened his arm, thinking about Roger with his lips and arms on you that night last year-

“Your point? She still said that shit about me” he said gruffly, but a pool of anxiety swirled in his stomach all the same

“Don’t you get it? Y/N is in love with you. She didn’t say or do anything to hurt you. At all. She hasn’t been eating, she hasn’t been doing homework, she throws up constantly, she’s barely left bed but to go to the library and usually all she does there is sleep anyway, she cries all the time and it’s been me making sure she still is present if not to just see people every damn day! So quit youre moping and fix this shit or I swear to God, Freddie, I’ll knock your block off.” George was heaving, pools of water in his eyes as he swallowed. “She’s my best friend too, you know.”

Fred looked up at George then and had started to cry. All of those things he said, all of the words he spat at her like they could burn her skin and cause some of the pain he believed she had caused him, when in reality you had-you had done nothing wrong.

“Georgie, I’m sorry” he choked.

“I know you are. But I’m not the one to say it to right now...you’ve gotta find her, Freddie. Please.”

you had been in the corner of the quidditch stands

the wind was blowing against your hair

you couldn’t be in your room anymore, it started to smell like you

and you, prior to an hour ago, didn’t smell too appetizing

you reeked of sweat and tears and your own sick

you took a shower so hot you wanted it to burn you alive

maybe sanitize the last of your fear and your hurt away

you had lost weight, you had lost feeling

you all in all had just lost

and you had never wanted to go home so badly, already considering writing home

you hated being reminded that your best friend and crush hated you

wanted you to be hated by everyone else too

but then, you heard footsteps

“Y/N?” Fred whispered to himself as he saw you in the stands. You looked so worn, so lifeless sitting there - he almost didn’t recognize you from the way your hair, usually scrunched up and bouncy had fallen flatly against your face, further slapped around by the wind outside. You had been wearing an oversized sweater and your sweatpants had pooled around your ankles. Simply put, you were miserable. 

“Y/N?” He called again once he was standing in front of you. You turned to look at him in what felt like slow motion, but when you locked eyes with him, you immediately felt fearful. 

“I-I’m sorry, I’ll leave now” you sputtered

“No, hey, wait, please” he reached out to grab your arm and you froze, letting him take it. He looked at you, with a flash of fear and worry on your face and he wanted to throw up knowing he was the one that made you feel like that.

“Fred, please let go” you hoarsely whispered.

“No, love, I’m not going to let go I have some things to apologize for.”

You started to cry, eyes dropping again to his hand on your arm and breathing feeling suddenly like a very hard task. “You hate me now: you sobbed and you pulled yourself from his grip, turning away from him and gathering your bag. He started to scramble for your hold again tears starting to stream down his face

“No, angel, please, I could never hate you”

“Oh? What about those things you said to me in your room-” you were walking faster over the benched seats, making your way to the other side.

“I know I know I said those things in my room but I can’t believe them because you have to believe me when I tell you I’m in love with you” and he was sobbing at your body turned away from him. You turned to look at him with a skeptical quirk of your face.

“No, no you don’t.” You spat.

“Yes, Y/N, I do please let me explain” he said earnestly taking in your bright eyes and the furrow of your brow.

“People who love each other don’t scream at them and throw things.” You said flatly. You wanted him to be true but you couldn’t make yourself believe him.

“Just give me five minutes of your time and-and if you hate me you never have to see me again. Please.” He closed the gap between you two and motioned for you to sit down. You licked a tear from your lip and nodded siting on a bench besides him.

“Hannah and Roger told everyone-”

“I know what happened. What they did. I want to hear about you. And what you said. And are saying” you looked at him in the eyes with steel burning behind your irises.

He sighed and rubbed his jaw. “I thought that what we had was purely sex in your eyes. And I was too much of a coward to ever ask you, so when I heard someone tell me that my own insecurities could possibly be true,” he inhaled a harsh breath as tears started to fall “I-I was crushed. By the idea that you saw me as what other people saw me as...as a toy? I guess? Or a sexual prop? To use when you wanted. But I hide my feelings a lot as you know, so even if you did feel that way, it would’ve looked like I agreed because I hate you knowing how sad I am,” he started to choke on his tears, the anguish of knowing he hurt you this much was too much for him to ever be able to handle. “I just wanted to hold you and whisper in your ear and tell you how much I love you and the thought of my own fears being true pushed you away. And you never have to forgive me. I-when I yelled at you like that I wanted to see you hurt, I think. I wanted you to see how sad it made me to think about you with other people like you had been with me and” he took a final breath and you pulled his body into you. “Y/N, my love I’m so sorry.” His sobs shook your body, the feeling and angle of the destroyed boy you love shaking you everywhere. You pressed kisses to his head. “Freddie, I love you” you repeated “I love you here and here and here and here and here” and with every kiss you gave him, you were determined to soothe him. “I-I’ sorry too, for not being as forthright with you about how i felt too. It’s always been you, Freddie.” He choked out a watery smile and he leaned in to kiss your face everywhere he could, his tears stinging against the wind and your cheeks. 

“If-If you could ever be with me I will always be open to it at any time, you know that don’t you? I-I understand if you can’t.” He held his forehead to yours, his nose brushing yours ever so slightly. 

“Freddie, I love you. You were who I missed when I couldn’t get out of bed for fuck’s sake you’re all I want,” and he leaned into you then fully, capturing your wet and chapped lips against his. Your arms wrapped around his neck and he melted into you like this

this

this was fred weasley

[evilminji]

D-Dad shaped Father Figure Lancer? He's concerned for this young man. Young Jason did not seem to have the most stable home life but is trying to make a difference in his community! And while he does hope some day he pursues his obvious passions for The Arts and gets a degree, it is not the sum total of a man's worth. Lancer is proud of him. Sends him his cell number.

Lancer DID teach YEARS of Ecto contaminated youth. He can advise Jason on how to handle some of his sickness, consult Experts for what he does not know. And just?

Imagine. Imagine being an undead superhero. Afflicted by madness. A crime lord. Everything has gone to shit. There is NOTHING left of you of that boy you once were... that goodness and light. Except this rinky dink little site. Basicly no one follows it. Why bother...

But maybe you update it because your drunk. Or a bit too punch drunk. Or it's 1am and you wish things were simple again. Were GOOD and clean and made sense like they used to. Maybe the book you bought just sucks. You update.

Mostly half hearted responses. Not sure what you were expecting. Except? That one teacher, the funny one that swore in book titles, is ALL OVER it. Just a WALL of text. Sent you an email too. Apparently... he.. he NOTICED.

He was worried as hell. Couldn't do much about it but clearly feared the worst. You always liked the guy. He was silly but stern, encouraging. Like B on his better days.

B doesn't have "better days" these days it seems like. At least not around you.

You find yourself answering the email. And the follow up. And the next. The most mundane, civilian, part of the last piece of who you were... somehow become an anchor. You try to do better, be better, because you know he'll be so proud to hear you're thriving. You fight against the festering GREEN that chokes and tears and poisons everything inside you because... because you want to believe you're better then that. Then THIS.

That he's right about you.

You find yourself talking about it. First vaguely, then more and more openly. Because Teach is not so Normal. His town has "Ghosts". It's even legit, he found the papers. It's apparently a thing. You start to wonder... you maybe kinda hope...

You ask.

Because "What If?". What if this has all been bias? Talia even SAID the madness has never lasted this long. Which means... it could very well NOT be Pit Madness. It could just have started around the same time as you came out of the pit. After you came back from being a mindless zombie. If ghosts are a Thing... could this be some sort of "I Died" thing?

Teach asks about your symptoms. Sends back honest to God cutesy high school PSA sheets about how to handle Ecto-Emotional spikes. And disregarding the talk about "growing" and "changing bodies"? It's eerie how close it is. Teach is talking about driving across town to consult some experts. Get their take on it.

Is telling you it's going to be okay.

As though anything has been okay since you crawled your way from the grave. You're terrified to believe. To let yourself hope. You does anyway because... because it's not Superman or Batman or some other larger then life figuring promising impossible to comprehend unthinkable things. It's a bald, pudgy, middle aged English teach with endless determination and the somehow unshakable belief you're worth it.

And yeah, sitting on your ratty couch, staring blankly at your laptop, you find you CAN place your faith in that. You didn't even know you had any faith left to place... yet here we are. And somewhere in a town (that's often where ever it damn well FEELS like being) called Amity there is an old and rickety, ergonomic, literary puns covered car puttering along towards the newly expanded Fenton's Building to talk to an old student.

That conversation will greatly concern and alarm the ENTIRE Family Fenton. (I'm sorry, did you SAY BUBBLING?!?! ECTOPLASM DOES NOT BUBBLE.) And cause a, rather now alarmed, one Mr. Lancer to STRONGLY request young Mr. Todd come visit. Immediately. For medical attention. And extend an offer to stay on the pull out couch Mr. Lancer has in his home office for a while.

You consider the offer. Consider telling anybody before you fuck off...

You Tell Alfred, Kori, and Roy, then hop on a plan. Peace Out Brucie✌

@stealingyourbones @cyrwrites

Short DPXDC Prompts #702

Lancer was very worried when the book recommendation blog he followed nearly religiously stopped making posts. Dead silence. Three years later, Lancer gets an email that they posted again. He almost forgot about them. Finding their email attached to the blog, he shoots them an email asking about their long hiatus. This certainly won’t be the start of a very interesting friendship…

[nonbinarykai]

Ok since two people asked

Why Lloyd is my least favorite ninja and how I rewrite him

Notes:// you know the rodeo by now, long post so it’s going to be under a read more, and I’m not gonna tag this with Lloyd because of the criticisms I have against his character, if you don’t want to hear Lloyd be critiqued then don’t reas the post

Why I don’t like Lloyd

Maybe it’s because I’m a Kai kinnie or maybe it’s because I have a bias agaisnt the younger sibling but Lloyd has never really been a favorite of mine

He was enjoyable in s1 but after that he kinda lost all personality for me and I stopped enjoying him

I think this is mostly for two reasons:

1. His screen time

2. His “character arcs”

I’ll go ahead and knock out his screentime here because it pretty much speaks for himself

Lloyd takes up so much screentime in the show that it’s actually jarring, he’s the character with the most seasons, having s1-2, s4, s8-11, and finally s14 ((the island special)). Which I think makes lloyds writing flaws all the more noticable

A big reason, albeit a bit of a petty one, for why I don’t like him is because he constant hyjacks other characters plots and makes them about him, this happened with Kai in both s4 and s11

Even if he’s not the main focus of a season, he always has a side plot focusing on him like in s3 and s12

The writers need to include Lloyd in other seasons is making it harder for the other main characters to actually have enough screentime to grow and develop on there own

And as a side effect of this, Lloyd gets to become the most important character in every season he is, taking roles from other characters who needed them

My best example is Cole being leader, he was set up and established as leader in the pilots and s1, and he did pretty good in it! Cole being a leader is a interesting concept that I would have loved to see been developed

But after Lloyd grew up they threw that plot point into the trash so they could have the mystical green ninja be leader even though throughout s1-7 he hardly actually talks to the main cast and him being leader doesn’t add any interesting dynamic like cole and kais rivalry despite Kai being a sort of right hand man to Coles leadership.

And in s1-s7 especially everything literally revolves around Lloyd to the point where his existence is more important than everyone else’s, and everyone’s motivations are to protect him.

Again I understand he is important, he’s the green ninja, but you have to let your other characters grow and develop, Lloyd is not the only main character in your show

Like for fuck sakes I don’t need 3 arcs about Lloyd and his dad, can I finally have another Kai season

Lloyds character arcs honestly kinda suck

Im going to be honest with you

Lloyds kinda an ass

The reason I like jay more then Lloyd even though jay has been way more mean spirited then Lloyd throughout the entire series is because you can atleast make the argument that jay doesn’t know when his jokes can hurt. And the show doesn’t portray jay as in the right, he gets what he deserves for some of the meanier things he says.

The same can’t be said about Lloyd

Lloyd says things to the other ninja that is honestly so mean spirited it’s jarring to hear it from him

Best example being when Lloyd told Kai to get over his shit when Kai was grieving in s4

But what makes it so frustrating is that the show always portrays Lloyd like he’s in the right which is why a lot of his character arcs feel flat or uninteresting

The only time this doesn’t apply is in s2 and in s3, in s2 the show paints Lloyd as being unfair to Misako when he RIGHTFULLY gets mad at her for abandoning him, I’ll get back to this later

The second time in s3 is when he’s traveling with Garmadon and having to be taught to balance his powers, which is actually one part of s3 I really liked, it was nice to see these two bond and have Garmadon teach Lloyd something that wu would other wise not teach him. And it’s a real shame the season cut it short AGAIN

The biggest example of the show making Lloyd seem in the right no matter what is in s4, Lloyds whole arc there was to learn how to view things from a different perspective and appreciate the things others have done for him. And this is would work if the show decided to do the same.

Again back to that scene with Lloyd and Kai in s4, the show treats Lloyd as if he’s in the right and it’s never addressed after this. Even though this is supposed to be the beginning of lloyds arc where he’s supposed to learn to view things from a different perspective

This scene would have worked if

1. The show didn’t paint him in the right for this, either by having Lloyd apologize or having the show acknowledged how it might have hurt Kai

2. If the plot Lloyd has remained a side plot instead of taking up the entire focus

Seriously, s4 could have been the ONE season where you can have a Lloyd side plot thats not forced and yet they fucked it up and made it the entire focus of the season thanks a lot.

To quote what I said in my Nya anayalsis awhile back

“I’m not upset that he has a flaw, just that it’s not recognized as one”

Lloyd would work way better as a character if the show just let him have consequences for his actions

Ever since he grew up and got the green ninja role he’s been treated like he can’t do no wrong which is clearly not true

But since we’re already on this topic

Hurting Lloyd doesn’t make him a good character

I feel like Tommy ((and sometimes the fandom)) really misunderstand what the use of suffering for in a story

There atleast 3 reasons writers make there characters suffer

1. To undergo a arc and realize where they have been wrong or to give a character a lot more depth to expand upon

2. If the story is a fallen hero one and the character suffers because of his Huberius

3. If the story is a tragedy

Ninjago is neither a fallen hero story or a tragedy and his pain doesn’t develop him as a character

A lot of writers don’t understand that suffering isn’t what makes a character good, it’s what pushes them to become good, you can’t just throw a character at the wall and expect them to instantly be a well written fleshed out character

A lot of the suffering Lloyd has to endure is mostly for no reason and it’s really mean spirited because it adds nothing to the plot, it’s just there to hurt him

Let’s bring up s11 as an example, Lloyd didn’t HAVE to fight the ice emperor from a writing standpoint, if anything it should have been kais battle because his lose of power and Zane going evil would have been a perfect reflection of s4 and tie it up after it ended kais character a bit open ended

But no let’s have Lloyd do it instead because haha isn’t trauma COOL and HIP

Now to be clear, I’m not saying that all of your stories have to end on a happy ending or anything like that, if your a writer then your allowed to do whatever you want with your personal writing

What I am saying is that ninjago is an actual SHOW made by PROFESSIONAL writers and they can’t understand the concept of a story structure

And the lack of actually addressing his trauma is really bringing down Lloyd as a character

Because it comes to a point where you understand why Lloyd is sometimes mean or distrustful of other people and it’s frustrating because you know that it’s flaws of him that are never going to be fixed because there writers want there trauma baby

How I would rewrite him

I’ve seen a lot of people suggest Lloyd become a villain in a future season and you know what, I sort of agree

But not in the way you think

I feel like it would be way more compelling if Lloyd was a villain but is still a ninja, instead of Lloyd switching sides, the show is switching perspectives

More or less I want Lloyd to be a reflection of the “true” villain, which is how wu ((and subsequently Lloyd)) put small Victories as more important then the ninjas life, passion, and desire, and how there black and white thinking of good and evil ends up to a lot of problems because there’s a lot of grey area there choosing to ignore

I want Lloyd to start of being loyal to wu’s philosophy and the protagonist, for random example let’s say Kai, sudden turn on these ideas in order to look outside the box to find if there truly is a better way to protect people without harming himself

I want Lloyd to be upset over what he thinks is a turn to the dark side when in reality, it would make his motivations make sense and not make his turn to “villainy” be out of character.

And over the course of the season he starts to realize how wus and subsequently his leadership has hurt the others and himself, and have him reflect on if all the pain they suffer through just to clean up wus mistakes is really worth it like wu says, or if there’s a better way like kai says

As for Lloyds actual character himself, I’d like for his flaws to be more noticeable

Have Lloyd be a gifted kid who gets praise when he doesn’t deserve it but still kinda acts like a brat because he’s still mentally like 10

Have him be a control freak who follows the rules way to strictly and is all serious when they have to do missions

Have his idealization of wu be realized and critiqued because honestly wu sucks ass

Would this make his character less like able? Maybe, but then he’d actually have depth and something to improve on

He can still have his s3 and s4 arcs, it’s just now they’re more important because he’s actually learning to be better

AND BEFORE ANYONE SAYS IM PURPOSEFULLY MAKING LLOYD WORSE SO THAT KAI LOOKS BETTER

ILL HAVE YOU KNOW AWHILE BACK I MADE A POST SAYING THE EXACT SAME THING ABOUT KAI AND HIS FLAWS SO THERE (/hj /lh)