#if i had to guess its probably because they would have disney backing them up on this

[freaky-flawless]

I don't have a strong opinion on the Jack and Sally dolls as I'm not a fan of the franchise itself, but I am a little irritated that they could give Jack a completely unique and accurate body and head sculpt but couldn't be bothered to give Elvira even slightly bigger tits.

[artist-issues]

BAM SURPRISE you are the head writer at Disney or whatever (the entire corporation for all their companies and movies, not just Disney animated) for one week and anything that you do during that time cannot be changed/altered later. What are you doing

Oh geez

Okay, besides torching all the sin-affirming stuff they do—

I would mandate that no more Live Action Remakes be made. Like, ever. I would cancel all upcoming sequels. I would force only Walt Disney Animation Studios and Pixar Studios to work on new animated films coming out—no utilizing the studio in Vancouver or outsourcing the work to AI or Japan or anywhere outside the U.S.

I would do that in the hopes that the animators who understand our specific culture would be forced to meet the challenges posed by new projects, instead of taking computer-generated-AI shortcuts to solving hard-art problems. And, when they make a movie that takes inspiration from other cultures, it forces them to learn about those cultures, themselves. Then, when they make movies, their unique American-in-Fill-in-the-Blank-Culture perspective adds depth, flavor, and my favorite thing, earnestness, to the design of the movie.

Next! I would hire Chris Sanders back. I would pay him literally anything he wanted. Probably by selling all our holdings in Marvel, because Marvel is dead as a doornail.

With that cash flow I would also LOWER THE PRICES TO GET INTO DISNEY WORLD AND DISNEY LAND. The prices get lowered. I don’t care. I don’t care. I don’t care if the whole company goes belly-up because I did that; I would drop the prices considerably to get into the parks. And to get Resort Packages. And then I’m jacking up the prices for the overseas parks.

Know what else I would do? Fix the Yeti in Expedition Everest, add the Hatbox Ghost into the Haunted Mansion, and blitz social media telling everyone about it. While I’m there I’ll make a post about how we’re destroying Genie+ and the Lightning Lanes. Utterly gone. Nobody gets to purchase cut-in-line time slots. Everybody waits in line together. Because guess what, forcing the normal-people line to completely halt while you let traffic from the gave-up-my-firstborn-to-purchase-a-faster-line-experience line go first every three minutes is CAUSING the wait times FOR BOTH to get LONGER, tricking people into purchasing “faster” line experiences that are actually still horrifyingly slow, and ruining the already-overpriced day for everybody involved.

Ahem.

Meanwhile, we’re getting that money back, because I’m putting Chris Sanders on a brand new project; he’s going to pitch me two ideas. One idea is all his own, it can be anything he wants. The other has to be an adaptation of The Firebird fairy tale. But he can be as liberal as he wants with the details, like he was for Beauty & the Beast.

He gets to direct his own, obviously, but since directing two projects would be really hard, I would bring in Roger Allen and Rob Minkoff to handle The Firebird.

Once we have the money, I’m funding four new projects in Disney World. The first is, Pizza Planet is becoming the new restaurant at Disney Springs.

The second is, the Rock n Rollercoaster is getting replaced by Phineas & Ferb’s coaster—just in time for the new season to come out on Disney+!

The third is; Avatar: The Way of Water-themed Resort which connects to the park, but guests may only cross over into the theme park during special After-Hours, when regular guests have had to leave because it’s closed. But it would be over the water, and have its own water park.

There are those indestructible glass windows making holes in the floor and the sides, and the rooms are all suspended over real water (with carefully-constructed foliage so that even though it feels open to the air like in the movie you actually have complete privacy, nobody can see into the rooms. And we’ll add curtains for the faint of heart, whatever) The windows in the floor double as screens which you can turn off or on; if the screens are on, a randomized animated loop fools the eye so that every once in a while, Avatar characters and marine life swim by or interact with guests.

Fourth thing in Disney World: additions to all the lands they’ve hobbled together in the last twenty years.

For example, New Fantasyland gets a Tangled ride where you’re following Rapunzel’s hair trail through the environments of the movie, and you and Flynn Rider are trying to catch up to her; but at certain crossroads the people in the vehicle can choose between multiple paths for your ride vehicle to travel down. This way, you and your party can be racing one another, so there’s an element of competition like there is in Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin.

Also! Galaxy’s Edge gets walk-around droids, two new hangout-style open-air restaurants, and an elaborate playground area made up of of nets, rope courses, and simple alien animatronics like you’re exploring a Resistance Base that was constructed by Ewoks.

Dinoland U.S.A. Is scrapped (except for the Dinosur Ride which is relocated) to make room for The Pridelands. You heard me. You thought I was going to say Zootopia, but no, that’s not jungly enough for Animal Kingdom.

The Pridelands has another the-most-elaborate-playground-in-the-world section, which is huge and sprawly, and full of things like fake tunnels which connect to the hollow skulls of elephants in an elephant-graveyard section, with screens made to look like windows that peer down into the geyser-bubbling lair of Scar. And of course there’s a Pride Rock, but it’s made like Rapunzel’s tower, so it looks far away in perspective, and occasionally an animatronic Zazu hops out onto the ledge, looks around, and hops away, or Simba prowls out, roars, and backs up out of sight again. Like a giant incredible cuckoo clock.

There are three rides to start with. One is a zany Timon-and-Pumbaa ride/game where you’re basically doing the Space-Ranger-Spin thing, looking for grubs. Another is a rollercoaster called “Escape the Stampede” and you’re basically hurtling along as if you’re galloping just ahead of the wildebeest in the gorge.

The third is a walkthrough of the events of the film, but with Avatar-level-advanced animatronics and hyenas come lurching out from behind things to snap at you.

The Pridelands has two restaurants; one is counter-service and it’s called “Timon & Pumbaa’s Grub Hub” and it’s all pasta bars, and Mac-n-cheese, so you can pretend you’re slurping up grubs if you’re a kid. The other is a reservation-only restaurant made to look like the beautiful forest Timon & Pumbaa live in, with built-in waterfall features and a ceiling that changes color and lighting effects to look like a starry sky or a dazzling sunrise depending on the time of day. It’s very atmospheric and the idea is to go on dates there. There’s also live African music.

And we’ll relocate the Festival of the Lion King here, too.

I’d also make a video game that is open-world and online-multiplayer, like Destiny, BUT it’s an elaborate retro-futuristic world with its own story based on Tomorrowland. The story would be impacted by what the players all around the world choose to do in-majority, and I’ll have three or four different routes it can go—but the main thrust of the game’s long, ongoing plot is a metaphor for the hard, passionate work of being innovative versus the dangers of cutting corners to make a profit in the name of “progress.”

For our Live-Action Department, they’re going to be working on a new series of Westerns based loosely on Big Thunder Mountain. It will be a trilogy, and it will star Matt Lanter as the hero, villain-character played by Chris Pratt, and Tim Allen (Tim Allen is Matt Lanter’s estranged father.) When they’re done with that they get to make a Space Mountain movie starring Letitia Wright. That’s what our Live Action Department gets to work on—original dramas based, if anything, on our original theme park attractions that nobody else in the world has.

And for our television studio, Tom Bancroft and his brother Tony are hired to make an animated series called “Escape Schism” and it’s about a young girl who discovers she has the ability to escape her dystopian-future world by jumping through television screens into movies. Each movie is a loose parody of iconic movies in the real world. The catch is, she can only stay in those movie-worlds for one day, and she can only take one object from the movie-world back into the real world after each visit. Other characters include the little brother she’s always trying to protect from the dystopia of their reality, and her older sister who works as a detective for the evil corporation that’s functioning as the government.

It’s lighthearted, it gets great views.

Then I’d hire @doverstar to make a series on Disney+ as a sequel to Lilo & Stitch: the Series. It can be Stitch & Ani.

Then I’d put the guy who did The Lion Guard in charge of Disney Junior, spearheading two new shows—one is a show about Robin Hood and Maid Marion’s life before the events of the animated movie, and the other is an original show called “Gift Shop” and it’s about a gift-shop owner who is actually a fairy godmother, and has to figure out the exact-right gift to give the fairy tale characters who stop by every once in a while. But it’s told from the perspective of her pet owl, Dusty.

Aaaand finally I’d completely destroy the Haunted Mansion movie in favor of a new, three-part television-film, (like the ones they do on SyFy) told from the perspective of the Groundskeeper. In this treatment, a young man named Kyle is terrified of really making the most of his life because of a fear of failure. He made one big mistake and it cost the family their ancestral home when he was a senior in college, and he can’t get over it. He becomes groundskeeper of the Haunted Mansion because of the exorbitant amount of money offered to do the job, thinking it can help him buy back the family house. Instead, he encounters the Hatbox Ghost—who enlists the new Groundskeeper’s help adventuring to break the control Constance Hatchaway has over the 999 Haunts living there. The Hatbox Ghost and she used to be in love. Kyle has to help them solve that in order to free himself from the position as Groundskeeper—but he thinks there’s something the Hatbox Ghost isn’t telling him.

While we’re at it, I’d remake Wish and The Rise of Skywalker. Because nobody can undo what I’m doing but I can undo what they did, right?

[7-wonders]

‘laying wide awake at night after watching a horror movie that left them unnerved’

could you do that prompt with the reader being the one who can’t sleep and Adrian comforting them and promising he’ll keep them safe?

I had two people request this prompt, thank you! Man I've MISSED writing for Adrian, this was so fun.

You've made a lot of dumb decisions in your life, though that's not specific to you. No, being human is about making dumb decisions. What is life if not a string of dumb decisions, one after the other?

Still, letting Harcourt and Economos pick The Exorcist: Believer for a team movie night instead of fighting harder for your and Peacemaker's choice, Taylor Swift: The Eras Tour, probably ranks up towards the top of your list of dumb decisions.

It probably wouldn't have even been that scary of a movie if you weren't watching it in the movie theater! Yes, The Exorcist scares you (you don't know a person who isn't scared by that movie), but it doesn't terrify you—there is a distinct difference between the two. Watching it in a darkened room, in surround sound, with 100+ other people just as scared as you are? That's terror at its finest.

After the movie was over, every member of The 11th Street Kids excitedly talked about how good it was, how scared they remained. Yet none of them looked affected or like they actually were still scared, so you pushed down your own fear and laughed it off as well. You went out for a couple of after-movie drinks, kissed Adrian goodbye as he went on patrol with Chris, and went home.

Now you're here, lying paralyzed under the covers and staring through the dark room intently as you try to discern if you're actually seeing something lurking in the inky blackness. Are those the yellow eyes of one of the possessed little girls, glowing dimly in the dark? If you strain your ears enough, can you hear the Latin of the exorcism? Your body begins to shake in fear, and you slowly draw the covers up over your head.

So wrapped up in your own mind are you that you miss the quiet sound of the door slowly opening. After having worked at A.R.G.U.S for a few years, it should be second nature to catch on to the feeling of the air shifting outside of your safe haven. But fear is a very powerful thing.

When something grabs the blanket and tugs it down, you scream.

The lights flick on as you do so, blinding you momentarily. When you blink the brightness out of your eyes, you come face-to-face with Adrian, your boyfriend. He's still in his Vigilante costume, which means he's just come back from patrolling. His mask is pulled off, and he's staring at you in bewilderment.

"Hey, I didn't mean to wake you up!" Adrian apologizes profusely.

"You didn't," you assure him, even as you try to get your heart to stop beating in your throat. "I wasn't able to fall asleep."

"Really? That's weird, you're always asleep by the time I come home." He hits the screen of your phone, lying on the nightstand, to check the time. "Do you know that it's three thirty right now? You're supposed to have a full eight hours of sleep to function healthily, and you're not gonna be able to get that."

Your lips twitch up in a smile. "I know."

"Then why aren't you asleep?"

"Promise you won't laugh?"

"I promise!" His face is so earnest, and you wonder why anybody would think that your open book of a boyfriend didn't have emotions.

"It's because of that stupid fucking movie."

"Which stupid fucking movie?" he asks cluelessly.

"The one that we saw only a few hours ago?"

Clarity dawns on him. "Oh, that stupid fucking movie! I didn't know it scared you that bad, pumpkin!"

You appreciate the seasonal term of endearment, probably one of the more tame ones that he's come up with. "You mean it didn't scare you?"

"It was a little scary, I guess. Maybe I'm just built different."

"You almost cried when we went on 'It's a Small World,'" you remind him, referencing your trip to Disney World.

"Hey, those dolls are fucking scary and definitely have the souls of children trapped in them!" Adrian defends. He must see something in your face that betrays just how scared you've been since you arrived home, because his own softens. "Man, that movie really scared you, huh?"

You nod, and he nods back.

"Alright, then." He sits on the bed abruptly, pulling you into his arms and laying down on the mattress with you.

"What—Adrian, you're all sweaty! You need to go shower!"

"Not until you fall asleep. I'm gonna stay right here and keep you safe."

"You know that I know the movie's not real, right?"

"I know. But your fear is. So I'm gonna make sure that you fall asleep, and then I'll fight off any nightmares if they try to come knocking."

He's so sweet sometimes that it makes your teeth ache. "What about your eight hours of sleep?"

"Screw that, I can catch some zzz's at the office tomorrow."

You laugh. "When you're supposed to be doing the mission paperwork that you've been putting off for over a week now?"

"Pssh, paperwork, shmaperwork."

Your conversation dies down, and Adrian reaches a long arm over to turn the lights off. Despite your best efforts, your eyes close from the heaviness of sleep calling to you, Adrian's humming and his hand rubbing your back helping to get you there. The memory of fear zings through your brain, however, and you jolt with a sharp gasp, feeling like you do when you're about to sleep and have the sensation of falling.

Adrian's immediately holding you tighter, making sure that you feel him with you. "Don't worry, I'm right here."

You nod and settle back into him. "Love you."

"I love you more...my moonlit lake." You chuckle, and that's the last thing you remember before finally falling asleep.

True to his word, Adrian makes sure that no nightmares bother you tonight.

7-wonders Halloween Spooktacular

[canirove]

My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 4

Author's note: On this chapter there are some things that give away that this story was written a long time ago, like the fact that it says that he is City's captain... Or that he dresses well 😅 P.S. I'm joking, please no one get mad at me 😭

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Masterlist

"Did you sleep well, darling? You look tired" grandma asked me the morning after the game.

"It probably was all the excitement from yesterday. She was still buzzing like young people say" grandad laughed.

"I think it was a mix of not being on my own bed and getting out of my comfort zone. I'm not used to it." 

Which was a lie. Mostly. I did miss my own bed, the one at my grandparents' house had the worst pillow ever. But if I looked dead and tired, it was because I had stayed up until 2 am reading about Rúben, watching his videos and looking at his photos.

Some would call it stalking. I call it doing research.

I read about his career, watched proper interviews and other videos where he was being silly, finding myself smiling like the idiot I am. I even watched some in Portuguese, the fact that I speak Spanish being very helpful to understand what he was saying. Or at least half of it.

I spent an hour just on his Instagram account, looking at everything he had posted, and especially the posts where he was topless. Like... He couldn't be real. He couldn't have a body like that, it had to be Photoshop. And it wasn't just the abs and the biceps. It also was his back. His legs. Everything. And judging by the photos where he was wearing clothes and the couple of times I had met him, he also knew how to dress and make the most out of that perfect body of his, which was unfair for the rest of the human population, both male and female.

I also spent a lot of time reading fanfic about him. There are so many talented people out there! And horny, which made me feel less alone. Because my dreams... Well. They were similar to the ones I had been having since meeting him for the first time, but now I knew what was under his clothes, and they weren't happening just on the lift or Lucy's house. Now that I knew that he was a freaking professional football player, there were so many new scenarios to explore... And I explored a few last night, like the changing room at the Emirates.

"Darling, are you sure you are alright? Should I take you to the doctor?" grandad said, bringing me back to reality. 

"To the doctor? Why?" 

"You look... I don't know. Off. And look at your cheeks."

"My cheeks?" I said, touching them. They were feeling very warm.

"Let me take your temperature" grandma said. "I don't want you traveling alone back to Manchester with a fever."

Oh, if only she knew. 

I wasn't traveling back to Manchester with a fever. I was actually traveling back to Manchester to meet the cause of my fever. And just the thought of it was making my stomach do funny things, not sure if good or bad ones. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Oh, c'mon!" I said when the shopping bag slipped from my hand as I reached to call for the lift, all its contents slipping on the floor.

"Let me help you with that" a male voice said behind me. No. Not just a male voice. The male voice. Rúben. 

"You don't need to, I can manage."

"And I want to help" he said, already picking some things from the floor. "Doesn't Lucy have someone to do the shopping for her?"

"Yes, but that's the weekly shopping. This is different."

"I can tell. I don't see Lucy letting Julia eat so much chocolate and sweets" he chuckled.

"Tonight we are having a movie night, that's why I bought all this. I'm not planning on feeding her just sugar for the whole weekend, I'm not crazy."

"Good to know" Rúben smiled. "What movie are you watching?" he asked while calling for the lift, the shopping bag on his hand.

"Not sure yet. Something from Disney I guess."

"What's your favourite Disney movie?"

"What?" 

"Mine is "Aladdin". Love the songs" he said, walking into the lift once the doors had opened. 

"I'm not sure about mine" I said, following him. "As a child I loved watching the "Swan Princess", but that isn't Disney."

"I think I've never heard of it before. Is it cartoons?"

"Yep. It is about a princess who is under a spell that turns her into a swan during the day, and at night she goes back into her human self but only if she is on a certain lake and when the moon is shining."

"Do they sing?"

"Oh, yes, they do. They have great songs."

"I'll have to check it out."

"What?" I laughed.

"Don't tell anyone, but I love watching kids' movies." 

"Worried your teammates may bully you?" I chuckled as the lift's doors opened at our floor.

"Nah, they already know. By the way, the Emirates was the last place where I expected to see you" Rúben said, walking towards my door.

"Same."

"Lucy hadn't told you?"

"We've never talked about you." Which is true. But mainly because I knew my face would give away that I am very attracted to Rúben. Like, a lot.

"Now that you know... What do you think about it?"

"I don't know" I said, opening the apartment’s door. "It's just a job. A special one, but a job."

"Your opinion about me hasn't changed then?" he asked, following me inside and into the kitchen.

"Why would I change my mind?"

"You know what they say about football players. Just a bunch of idiots that kick a ball, who earn way too much money, who just party and cheat on their wives... Those things."

"I don't know enough about you to judge."

"Then we must do something about that" he said, leaving the shopping bag on the table. "Do you think Julia would mind if I joined you on your movie night?"

"I'm sorry, you want what?"

"It'll be a way to get to know each other a bit better. And I don't have plans tonight, so watching a Disney movie in good company sounds great."

I don't know what happened after that, what I said or did. Probably that yes, that he could come, because I remembered his smile and a "see you tonight." But my brain was stuck on his previous two last sentences.

For some reason, he wanted to get to know me better. Me. And I apparently was good company? He could have said it just about Julia, he clearly adored her. But he wasn't talking about her. We weren't talking about her. So... It was about me, right? I was good company. Did that mean that he was flirting with me? Rúben Dias, Manchester City captain and international player with Portugal, was flirting with me? The piano teacher turned into nanny?

It had been years since a guy had tried to flirt with me, I was very rusty. So maybe he was just being nice and I understood everything wrong. Or maybe not.

Whatever it was, I would be finding out in just a few hours... 

[pfffsfic]

Post-Fall Falls False Starts- Chapter 6: Wish Upon a Triangle

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"Cosplaying him didn't work, or at least it hasn't yet," Sarah mused. "I was gonna go and try to fall asleep by the instructions for summoning him, but it turns out I've only ever seen here and never actually been here and I don't know my way around at all. Embarrassing, right? I just fell asleep in a random cave and hoped that would work."

Rob blinked absently.

"Thing is, I dunno when we are. Like, has he already been summoned? If I did it first, would that lead to some kind of freaky paradox? Would I be on the wrong side of time law? I guess I also want him to come to me because that's more satisfying than just brute-forcing it and making him show up, but is that too selfish of me, or is it just the right level of selfish?"

"Uh-"

"Besides! Imagine I summon him and he asks why, and I say, oh! I dunno. I just wanted to talk! That would make me seem so desperate! Ugh, but maybe desperation can be cool in sort of a yandere type of way? Is that how I want him to see me? As some- some- fangirl? Well, maybe I am, but not for him! This is purely a narrative thing! Ugh! How the heck do I get him to notice me without making it seem like I want him to notice me? Rob, any ideas?"

Rob scrunched his eye closed. He felt like a web browser with 52 tabs open. Minutes earlier, Sarah had led him back to camp, sat him down, and promised to explain everything. She had asked him where to start, he had said, 'wherever you think is best', and she had replied, 'okay, I'll start in the middle'.

"Uh, you want me to tell you how to meet a demon?"

"Not just any demon. We're talking about-"

"I know, you've said Bill like fifteen times! I have no clue who he even is or why you wanna meet him so bad. We're done with the middle and the end- start at the beginning. Can you do that?"

"The beginning. Okay, okay, sure, I can do that. I'm more of an in medias res type of girl, myself, but linear storytelling has its benefits-"

"Get to the point."

"Chill out! I'm getting there! Okay, okay, so! Our story begins in 2012."

"Maybe start a little closer to the present."

"No can do. You want the whole story, right? Besides, 2012 is the present right now, at least probably. The timeline hasn't been confirmed- whatever."

Rob almost scoffed, but found himself nodding and burying his chin in his palm.

"Okay, so, the year is 2012, and the media landscape is a pretty great place for a company called- wait. No, no, let me start from the veeeeery beginning. The year is 1901. Flora and Elias Disney are in Chicago, Illinois, about to bring their fourth child into the world..."

The shadows grew longer, and Sarah's story meandered every which way, and at one point she retrieved a flashlight from who-knows-where and held it under her chin despite the lack of anything spooky in her ramblings. When she finished, the first stars of the night had appeared in the evening sky above the clearing. Rob found himself staring at them instead of paying attention.

"Anyways," said Sarah, taking a breath so deep she momentarily turned inside out (had she not been breathing for the hours it took her to tell the story?) "Gravity Falls. That's where we are."

He sat up, rubbed his eye, and thought for a moment, 'what a waste of time'. And then, as if by a truck, he felt the weight all of the information his subconscious brain had picked up on while he zoned out.

"Wait," he said, holding his hands up. "You're telling me this place where we are exists in the form of a fictional cartoon back home? We are inside a story you've already seen? Right now?"

He knew this place was also a work of fiction to the real world, but he had never once considered that it might be fiction to his world as well. What did that mean? Surely that had really huge implications hovering just outside of his cognitive reach! Hindsight was 20/20! And now, for better or worse, he was no longer the capable one. Upstaged. By a fangirl, no less. Typical. Hold on, he wondered, what if this went both ways? What if somebody recognized him as a fictional character? That would be bad for his whole monster shtick that he had been fantasizing about on the down-low since his encounter with that human guy. He'd need to know for sure! Sarah was nodding.

"Do you know if there's an internet in this universe?" Rob asked. His phone had been dead since long before he left Elmore, what with the lack of a usable power grid.

"Sure there is! After all, in season 2, episode 2-" Sarah paused, noticing Rob's dead, empty gaze, and got to the point quickly. "Yes, the internet exists here. Why? Oh, don't tell me..."

Sarah was blushing and squishing her cheeks now and Rob felt it was best for his peace of mind to not think about why. He had in his grasp a chance at thriving in this new world, armed with someone knowledgable about it, and he could not jeopardize that by giving the poor girl an existential crisis over her own nonexistence. He had come to think of himself as the solemn guardian of forbidden knowledge- a man (or, when it counted, kid) burdened with the truth and the responsibility associated with that truth. That had been the ethos behind his convoluted rescue plan for the people of Elmore Junior High. Well, that and it seemed like the kind of plan a professional supervillain ought to make, and, provided there were a lack of supervillains in the real world, he wanted his rather spotted career to go out with a real bang.

"Sarah, I just wanted to ask- no hard feelings, right?"

"Hard feelings? About you not listening to me? Oh, trust me, I get that all the time."

"No! I meant about the whole Superintendent Evil thing!"

"That? That was a long time ago."

"It was two weeks ago."

"Two weeks is a long time in the apocalypse. Look, don't worry about it, okay? Human AUs are totally classic! I was just thinking, hmmm- if this Evil guy is actually evil, Gumball and Darwin will take care of him in about 11 minutes."

That comment might as well have been an arrow through Rob's nonexistent heart.

"Would it cheer you up if you got to say, 'I told you so'?"

He had wanted to say that before, but now there was very little fight left in him.

"I told you so," Rob replied in a weak little voice...

...That grew stronger as something bubbled up inside of him.

"I told you so! I TOLD YOU SO!" He got to his feet, gesturing wildly, as his pent-up rage came to the surface. "Nobody listened, and we could be in the real world, but instead I'm stuck here with a crazy weirdo girl who's trying to summon a demon! On purpose! And we have no food, no internet, no way home, heck, no home to return to. It's your fault. It's all of your faults! The one time I try and do something good, fate comes along and slaps me in the face for it! UUUGH!"

He smacked his head on a nearby tree and fell backwards into the dirt, clutching it in pain and glitching out for a second. Why was it that every time he tried to lash out in anger he ended up hurting himself? ...Well, in this specific instance, he wasn't sure what he thought would happen.

"What did you think would happen?" Sarah asked, peering over him.

"Shut up," he mumbled, rolling over to lay face-down in the dirt.

"Do you need ice?"

"I know that if I say yes, you're gonna-"

She flopped down next to him on her back so that they were cheek-to-cheek, her iciness soothing his headache a little. He reluctantly let it happen. He hadn't meant to fall asleep, but something about the whole situation lulled him away from the waking world and into an uneasy dream.

It was the forest, yes, just as it had been before he fell asleep, only Sarah was absent and so were the stars above. He noticed moments later that the floor underfoot was the familiar- if heavily cracked- tile floor of Elmore Junior High, covered in the dirt that lined the forest floor in the waking world, with a familiar hole several feet from him leading down into the void. It wasn't growing. A moment from his memory forever frozen in time. Something drew him towards the hole and he discovered first that its surface rippled like water and second that he could see his reflection in it.

The reflection shifted and changed with the surface of the liquid static. It melted into his cute (he liked to think so) look from long before he had been chewed up and spit out, and then into how he'd looked right before hitching a ride out of the void the first time, and then into Superintendent Evil's visage, and then into an odd human form he didn't recognize- and then into a yellow, strangely-shaped form he definitely didn't recognize.

It blinked.

Five seconds later, Rob processed what exactly was wrong with that, and six seconds later, one of the reflection's black hands reached past the static surface and latched onto the edge of the hole, pulling its entire triangular body out and into the air right in front of Rob's face. The thing put its hands on what passed for its hips, ascended further into the sky, and turned a gaze with an undercurrent of frustration to Rob, who blinked and suddenly righted himself in confusion. Something stirred in the back of his mind, something that would have helped clarify the situation had he been more lucid.

"Hey, kid! Want a once-in-ten-billion-lifetimes opportunity?" came a shrill voice from everywhere, though Rob gathered the thing was the one speaking by how its body flashed. "You're about to hear me say something I have never said before! Listen up- I'll only say it once- this is the kind of thing you're gonna remember for the rest of your life, whether you want to or not!"

Happiness, maybe? Annoyance? Anger? It was hard to tell. Either way, Rob found his words at the exact same time that the yellow thing did, and as it turned out, they were the exact same words.

"Who the heck are you?"

[fancylala4]

Hi! I see where U reblogged my tangled crit posts 👀

I dont hate it, it just doesnt hit as well as it should. I prefer the barbie version. And I prefer Disney Rapunzel with ROTG Jack because not only they the same age but i find the parallels a bit more fascinating.

I remember seeing a arrow toy Rapunzel themed at Target, just recently I found out she was going to use a bow and arrow beforehand XD much much cooler than a frying pan!

Which begs to question! Why is the franchise so off with its girl characters? Gothel's entire motivation is staying young, Cass ended up a mess, Ariana is underwritten. And Rapunzel barely has another girl her age to hang out with. It's just Cass.

I get it. I disliked the movie at first because of the movie itself and how badly it was written but I started to hate the movie because of the rabid, racist fans and how badly they treated patf just to prop this movie up back in the day. The fandom is still pretty bad from what I seen.

The Barbie version is one of the best adaptations of rapunzel I have ever seen. It’s so good and it holds up perfectly well today except for the animation of course. If you get a chance, you should check out rapunzel’s revenge. It’s a great rapunzel comic and Disney took elements from that version as well.

I definitely agreed that Jack Frost and rapunzel would make a good couple. I liked them way better than him and Elsa and definitely would be way better than creepy dream.

Oh I saw that now in stores and I wonder why they made it when Merida is right there. I did hear that the series writers wanted her to have the bow and arrow but Disney didn’t like that idea. Probably because they wanted her to be helpless and didn’t want her to be taken seriously with a weapon. I remember looking at some Lego sets and I saw that rapunzel had a bow in a set for the series. So I think that rumor was true. Yeah, I would like the bow and arrow way better than that dumb frying pan. I guess it doesn’t matter since rapunzel wasn’t shown as a threat with the frying pan and it was more Flynn’s weapon in the movie.

Yeah, it’s so weird how this franchise is targeted towards little girls and all the female characters in it is just off and can be really offensive. Gothel is a walking outdated stereotype of many, rapunzel has no flaws, gets overshadowed in her OWN movie and couldn’t even drive the plot of the movie! It’s hard to believe this movie was made in 2010, it belongs in the 50s.

I have limited knowledge of the series characters but is cass the one who they made a villain and has blue hair like she’s some anime character? If so, It’s bad because I think I seen people say that she’s a villain because of how she looks and they turned a friendship into a bitter one just in a sake of something dumb. Do the writers think that girls have to be catty to each other or else it’s unrealistic? It’s a weird choice for a franchise targeted towards little girls. Ariana is the queen, right? I think I reblog a post about cultural appropriation in the movie and they mentioned her name. But really? They could have had a good plot point about rapunzel and her getting used to a good mother after what she’s been through. But they thought it was better just to focus on the king, have him be even more abusive to rapunzel than gothel was (reading her diary, following her everywhere and locking her up in a fucking tower after she just got out of one!!) and say that it’s ok because he’s doing it because he loves her.. I also “love” how the queen basically did nothing about this and just say supportive things rapunzel behind the king’s back like that means anything. Disney really needs to hire women for this franchise because this is just embarrassing and sad in this day and age.

[humorisstoredinthetits]

The Heathers+Veronica Trip to Disney World

I guess I should probably introduce myself, hello people I'm Heather and I talk about Heathers and thats about it

I made some earlier headcannons about this but I'm gonna be expanding upon them

Now onto the gays TM

PS I'm gonna explain all the Disney stuff for the people who haven't been

Mac had always wanted to go to Disney World since she was little kid

Her parents wouldn't take her because 1 they didn't want to deal with each other for that long and 2 they didn't want to spend all that time and money to go only for Mac to have a meltdown and not want to do anything

But now Mac is an adult and can do what she wants and she wants to go to Greedy Rat Park (also Disney implemented DAS which is for people who for whatever reason cannot wait in line for extended periods of time, it lets people come back to rides at certain times and skip the line)

Veronica was all in for it, she thinks it would be fun and a good time, and despite the fact they have all this money they don't really go on vacation that often

Duke was pretty iffy on the whole thing, it sounded like fun on paper but they would be in the heat and have to wait in lines and people, but she also knows it would make Mac so happy to go so eventually she gets on board

Chandler is the big holdout

She knows that to get to Disney World they would have to go on a plane and she is super afraid of planes, plus she's also not a huge fan of amusement park rides

It gets to the point that Veronica and Duke planned a surprise trip for as a gift for Mac's bday and they just told Chandler they're going, suck it up buttercup

Chandler throws a hissy fit but they remind her that it would make Mac so happy to go

Mac is like Chandler's kryptonite so when they brought that up Chandler decided to just deal with it

They also decide to take a trip to the beach for her at a later time to make up for this

So her bday comes around and it comes down to the final present

Mac opens it and there's 4 Magicbands (Its a bracelet that acts as a park ticket, payment method, room key and more) in their signature colors and a small note saying 'We're going to Disney World!'

She starts happy crying and pulls them into a big hug

She hugs them so tight that it starts to hurt

They plan to go in October bc it won't be super hot but also not super cold, and most of the kids will be in school so there won't be as many people, both of which are chosen to make the trip as least stressful for Mac as possible

Over the next few months Mac spends all day watching Disney World videos on youtube to know what to expect

She orders everyone matching shirts for every day so they can have cute group photos

She packs her suitcase months in advance and it just sits in the corner of her room

In the meantime Chandler is regretting her decisions

She's afraid of planes and Veronica spends a-lot of time reminding her that planes are safer than cars but she's still afraid

She also shows Chandler videos of the rides to show her exactly what they are gonna be when they get there

Fast forward to the night before, Mac is so excited she is bouncing off the walls while Chandler is internally freaking out because she doesn't want to go on the plane

Veronica seriously considers putting some NyQuil in her coffee so she sleeps the whole flight

They drive to the airport and go through TSA and Chandler is still freaking out but she doesn't wanna ruin it for Mac

Mac finally notices Chandler looking upset and they talk

Chandler confesses that she is afraid of planes but she wants to go on this trip bc Mac has been looking forward to it for months

Mac comforts her and when they get on the plane they get out the split headphones and watch Disney movies the whole ride there

Of course they watch Frozen bc it was their favorite movie during their childhoods

In a weird role reversal its Chandler being the one holding on to Mac's arm during takeoff and turbulence

Veronica and Duke sleep the whole way there bc between dealing with the ball of sunshine who barely slept last night and kept tossing and turning and giggling and the nervous wreck who did the same neither of them got much sleep either

They get to Florida and get their luggage and get on the bus to Disney World

The plan is to spend 5 days not including the day of arrival and departure, one for each park and a free day

They're staying at the Grand Floridian (Biggest, most expensive and fancy hotel) bc they have the money so why not

They arrive at their room and get settled

There's 2 queen sized beds so they have to decide who gets to sleep with who

Duke and Veronica quickly take one of the beds for them bc they would like to sleep and not deal with the other two not being able to sleep

They go have dinner at 1900 Park Fare (Restaurant, weird name ik) where they get to meet Aladdin, Cinderella, Tiana and Mirabel

One of the things they decided while planning was to get as much character dining bc they thought it would be something Mac would enjoy, and they were right

Mac makes a plan there to try and meet as many characters as possible and take pictures with all of them

After dinner they go take a dip in the pool before going rest for the night

Day #1: Magic Kingdom

They decide to go to Magic Kingdom 1st because both it and the Grand Floridian are on the monorail so it would be the easiest to get back to the room if Mac starts to not be able to handle it

They get up super super early bc Mac physically cannot contain her excitement

They have breakfast reservations at the Crystal Palace where they can meet the Winnie the Pooh gang which makes Mac excited (Pooh is her favorite bc he's yellow)

From there they go to Tommorowland

I'm not gonna go over every ride bc if I did that we would be here all day and I would have to make 10 posts to contain it all so I'm just gonna do hilights

Chandler usually stays outside the rides bc she's scared but there's a few that she will go on, usually those that are slow

She does go on Buzz Lightyear's Space Ranger Spin (shooting ride) and obviously she goes with Duke bc she must beat her

They both fight over who gets to control the spinny stick in the middle

They have special spots that give more points which Duke looked up in advance so when they get to those sections her points skyrocket

Chandler is mad butthurt whenever they exit the ride and Duke is gloating

Veronica actually got more than her but she lets Duke have her victory (She also looked up the special spots in advance)

Mac tries to do literally everything which takes a minute

They go on the Carousel of Progress (show) which occasionally spins to the next scene but Chandler didn't realize this was gonna happen so when it does she screams

After they go on the Tommorowland Speedway (You drive a little car) which is hard to control and Chandler's life flashes before her eyes while Mac goes as fast as she can

They move into Fantasyland where they see Gaston

Gaston goes to Chandler and starts flirting

Mac intersects and asks for a pic and when Gaston poses with his flexed muscles she pulls down her sleeves revealing her toned cheerleader muscles and Gaston's mouth drops

Veronica and Duke are off to the side dying of laughter

When they get to the Haunted Mansion Chandler gets so scared that she has to go through the 'chicken door'

Veronica has never looked more embarrassed in her life when her 20-something-year-old gf has to leave a theme park ride bc she's scared when they went over it before they left

They have lunch at Cinderella's Royal Table (in the Castle) where Mac gets pics with Cinderella (duh), Aurora, Ariel, Snow White and Jasmine

When they go on Jungle Cruise (explanatory) Duke laughs so hard at all the stupid Dad jokes

They finish up the rest of the park and still have some time to spare so they go shopping

Chandler finds a couple of shirts and some cute Disney jewelry but not much else

Same with Veronica, but she buys a couple of pins and other random collectibles

Duke buys some pins of her favorite characters for her office at work plus a few other things

Mac buys so much stuff that she can barely carry it all, shirts, collectibles, pins, stuff for their home and so many stuffed toys

Thankfully they can get it all shipped back to their resort to pick it up when they get back so they don't have to carry it for the rest of the day

They have dinner at Be Our Guest (Beauty and the Beast restaurant) where they meet Belle and Beast

They try the grey stuff (its delicious)

Afterwards they go back and ride some stuff again

Chandler looked up where all the special spots were while everyone was on other rides so she goes for a rematch and she beats Duke and is celebrating but then Veronica shows that she got 100,000 points over her

Duke and Chandler mope for the next 15 minutes that they got beat by Veronica

They go find some of the characters that Mac missed on the first go round like Buzz Lightyear or Jack Sparrow who only come out randomly

They then go get a spot for fireworks which they watch

Mac happy cries again

They then go back to the resort and pick up their purchases

They have to make 2 trips because Mac bought so much crap

They all pass out because as much fun they had, they are exhausted

Chandler's Favorite Ride: Buzz Lightyear's Space Ranger Spin

Duke's Favorite Ride: Jungle Cruise

Mac's Favorite Ride: Under the Sea; Journey of the Little Mermaid

Veronica's Favorite Ride: Haunted Mansion

Day #2: EPCOT

They get to EPCOT early

Mac wants to stay at each park from open to close and bc this is her trip everyone agrees

Veronica enjoys the more educational rides like Spaceship Earth (the globe) and Living with the Land (shows off EPCOT's farming) but Chandler and Duke are bored out of their minds

They go to Cosmic Rewind (Guardians of the Galaxy rollercoaster) which obviously Chandler sits out of but while she waits she goes into the gift shop

In there they sell Infinity Gauntlets and she decides why the hell not

She gets one of the Iron Man ones bc its red and thats her color

When they get out of the ride they see Chandler with the gauntlet on her hand they start laughing bc the sight of Chandler with this oversized thing on her hand is too funny

Chandler goes up to them and does a terrible Thanos impression and goes "I am inevitable" and tries to snap but she didn't realize that it physically cannot stop

She gets mad that she spent all that money on it and it can't even snap which is like its whole deal

Of course the other 3 buy one too

They go on Test Track (car ride) where you can design your own car and they create the dumbest looking car possible

The wheels are bigger than the rest of the car, it has all these stupid add ons like spoilers and giant exhausts and stickers

They dub it the Heathermobile

They have lunch at Space 220 (it simulates being in outer space) which is cool but Mac is disappointed there are no characters for her to see

They go around the countries on the World Showcase which also bores Chandler and Duke bc its just learning

When they get to Japan Duke and Veronica buy so much anime crap

They all get kimonos in their own colors

Duke debates buying a samurai sword but realizes that she probably wouldn't be able to put that on the plane

They buy a bunch of Japanese snacks including some pocky

Mac and Veronica play the pocky game, Mac loses bc she's giggling the whole time

At each Pavilion Duke makes a terrible impersonation of that country's accent and Veronica just facepalms every time

They go to the Norway Pavilion and Mac and Chandler are excited bc they have all the Frozen shit

They're slightly disappointed bc on the Frozen ride the faces of the animatronics are projected and they look kinda creepy

But after they get to go meet Anna and Elsa and this was like a dream come true moment for kid Mac and Chandler and they take a really nice picture

When they get home they frame it and put it on the wall

They have dinner at Akershus (princess restaurant in Norway Pavilion) where Mac meets most of the princesses she had already seen plus Aurora

Chandler takes a picture with her bc that's her favorite Princess and Disney movie

They get done with everyone pretty quick bc EPCOT is alot smaller than Magic Kingdom so they decide to go drinking around the world

Drinking Around the World refers to going to each country and doing their favorite activity, drinking alcohol

Veronica stays sober bc one of them has to make sure they get back to the room

By the time they get halfway around the Heathers are all wasted and Veronica basically has to drag them back to the room

Chandler's Favorite Ride: The Seas with Nemo and Friends

Duke's Favorite Ride: Cosmic Rewind

Mac's Favorite Ride: Frozen Ever After

Veronica's Favorite Ride: Living with the Land

Day #3: Hollywood Studios

The Heathers wake up hungover as hell

Veronica prepared for this and got some water and other makeshift hangover cures she could make with what they had in the resort gift shop

By the time its time to leave they feel mostly better

They get to the park and go straight for Toy Story Land

They go on Toy Story Mania (similar to Buzz lightyear) and Duke and Chandler had been researching to see what they can do to cheat and win

Upon finding nothing they both try new tactics

During the third section Chandler realizes she's down so she keeps ramming into Duke to try and throw her off balance

Seeing that Chandler is playing dirty, during the next round Duke kisses Chandler which stuns her for a few seconds which allows her to regain the lead

Duke gets the win but then Mac gets more points than her to the shock of everyone

She takes a victory picture and orders a shirt off of Etsy saying "Toy Story Mania champion"

They head to Galaxy's Edge (Star Wars Land)

They got reservations for the lightsaber building and droid making

They each build a lightsaber, Mac is upset bc she can't get a yellow crystal but she finds out she can buy one so it all works out

Once they realize that if they fought with those they would break they go to another gift shop and buy the cheap toy ones

They also all make droids in their signature colors

They go on Smuggler's Run (Millenium Falcon Ride)

Mac and Duke take the pilot role and Veronica and Chandler are the gunners

The two other people unfortunate enough to be with them have to deal with them all yelling at each other bc the gunners arent shooting fast enough and Duke keeps ramming the Falcon into things

They get a low score and they're all kinda upset with each other but not really, they get over it in like five minutes

They go on Star Tours (Star Wars simulator ride) and Veronica is the rebel spy

After they get off the Heathers keep calling her a traitor to the Empire and shit like that

Mac fucking loves the Muppets and nearly happy cries during MuppetVision3D (muppet show)

They have lunch at Sci Fi (you eat in cars and watch old 50's scary movies

Chandler and Duke sit in the back and are scared of the cheesey old movies while Veronica and Mac just laugh at how obiviously fake they all are

They go watch all the shows like the Indiana Jones and Beauty and the Beast ones

Mac goes meet Olaf which is also a childhood dream of hers

They all go to the Frozen Sing a Long and Mac sings along

The rest of them think its cute

Duke is the only one who isn't scared of the Tower of Terror and she goes on alone

There's a great picture of her screaming her lungs out on the ride that they wanted to hang on the wall but Duke wouldn't let them

They have dinner at Hollywood and Vine (just a regular restaurant tbh) where Mac meets Minnie, Goofy, Pluto and Donald

They go see Fantasmic! (Nighttime Show) at the end of the night

When they leave they're just in awe, Mac is happy crying

Chandler's Favorite Ride: Toy Story Mania (even if she lost)

Duke's Favorite Ride: Tower of Terror

Mac's Favorite Ride: MuppetVision3D

Veronica's Favorite Ride: Rise of the Resistance

Day #4: Animal Kingdom

They get there early like every other day

They get in line for Flight of Passage (Avatar flying ride) and they are just in awe of how amazing of an experience it was

Even Chandler who doesn't normally like rides through it was an amazing ride

They buy little Banshees which sit on their shoulders and its really cute

They have breakfast at Tusker House where Mac gets to meet the whole Mickey Mouse gang

Next is Kilimanjaro Safari (self-explanatory)

Mac has an amazing time seeing all the different animals, especially the stuff they don't have back in their local zoo like hippos and crocodiles and she takes a bunch of pictures

Afterwards they has reservations to go on a closer tour of the ride where they can get a whole lot closer to the animals and they even get to feed some of them which makes Mac so fucking happy

They go to the Tough to be a Bug show and right as the show ends the seat moves like bugs are crawling under it and it scares the crap out of all of them

There's several shows involving birds where they can see him up close and afterwards Mac talks to the handlers about the animals

They go on Kali River Rapids (raft ride) and they all get soaked except for Chandler who wisely sat that one out

They all come back with wet clothes and Chandler just has this 'i told you so' attitude

Mac is pretty disappointed with the Dinosaur area and how low quality the whole thing seems

Animal Kingdom is pretty small and there isn't a whole lot to do so they call it an early night

Chandler's Favorite Ride: Flight of Passage

Duke's Favorite Ride: Expedition Everest

Mac's Favorite Ride: Kilimanjaro Safari

Veronica's Favorite Ride: Na'vi River Journey

Day #5: Free Day

They decide to sleep in and just cuddle when they wake up

Even Mac, who wants to go out and just do things is tired and in desperate need of physical affection from her gfs

They decide to spend the morning at Disney Springs, the shopping center for Disney World

There's plenty of non-Disney shopping to do there like Uniqlo, the Coke Store, M&Ms and their favorite, the LEGO store

They all get a plush M&M with their signature color and they snack on a giant bag of them that they bought

They buy just so much Disney crap bc its their last day

Clothes, Collectibles, Duke buys like 20 different pins, Home decorations

Mac gets a bunch of plushes

When they go checkout at the World of Disney (main store at Disney Springs) the cashier just sees 4 women all carrying as much stuff as they physically can and has to call someone to help them bring it all to the area to ship it to the resort

Then they go to the LEGO store and buy the 400 dollar Disney Castle plus other Disney sets

They go around and eat a bunch of different treats and snacks

They go back to the room to rest for a little while before deciding to go to putt-putt golf

Obviously Duke and Chandler make it a competition which Mac wins

Mac is really good at putt-putt

Then they go back to the room, take a dip a the pool and get some drinks

In the following morning they have to arrange the shipment of all of their purchases to their home which is made more difficult bc Disney needs their receipts to be able to ship so they are just scrambling to find all the necessary ones before the bus to bring them back to the airport gets there

They do manage to figure it all out and they get on the bus and eventually the plane back to Ohio

Despite everything they all had a good time and they're thinking about making it a yearly trip, much to Mac's delight

[kimodraw]

do you have any recs for other peter pan media? i love your art and just read peter darling and i feel crazy

thank you so much! sadly i don't have many because i think a lot of peter pan media is. bad and misses the point.

If you haven't read the original book, i can't recommend it enough! I find sooo charming and well written. Other than that my favorite adaptation ever is the 2003 movie it drives me up the walls how good this movie is. The disney movie is fine and very well animated but you dont need me to tell you abt the disney movie.

As a kid i LOVED Peter pan in scarlet by Geraldine McCaughrean!! Wendy and the lost boys go back to neverland as adults and find it has gone to shit, peter wearing hook's coat and becoming more and more irritable. I actually just learned its the 'official' sequel, authorised by the Great Ormond Street Hospital, so that's neat

Huhh I saw a peter pan musical 2 years ago lol? its french and definitly wasn't recorded, i was the only adult without kids and i had a great time, smee was a woman (double win for feminism AND homophobia ) and they didn't take advantage of the room filled with 6 years old to ask them to all scream they believe in fairies. boo, don't know why i told you abt this. movin on

I haven't read the loisel peter pan series yet so i can't exactly recommend them but i love the art

it seems very edgy and also probably misses the point, and i bet its filled to the brim with early 2000s sexism but. loisel art. yummy. need to check out my local library rn actually

I also liked peter darling quite a bit! heard the audiobook version and had to listen to gay erotic scenes narrated by an old british man on the subway. great experience

i hated lost boy by christinia henry with a PASSION: bad writting, made hook straight, doesnt get peter by making him litteraly evil (hes meant to be a child!! the most child ever!! when he does bad things its because he's selfish or doesn't get it or is angry he's a child!!!) anyway i hate how much this book gets recommended to me whenever my peter pan posts get some traction stop talking to me abt lost boy you guys tricked me into reading it already!! only good thing it does is replacing the native americans by. giant spiders. so i guess less racism than most peter pan works. great

idk ive heard of hooked recently. you guys know abt hooked? from booktok? seems bad

i have a short and mediocre playlist abt my peter pan,, thing too (title translates to 'im mad because 'lost boy' really is the perfect title for this' lol)

thanks for allowing me to ramble abt peter pan!! sorry for not having a lot of positive answers, have a peter i havent posted here yet

if anyone has recs THAT ARENT LOST BOY BY CHRISTINNIA HENRY!!!! feel free to drop them, both me and anon would love that im sure

[degenderates]

ok fuck it. ranking covers of a home at the end of the world by michael cunningham because guys some of these covers slap and some of them are the ugliest shit i've ever seen. this is the kind of post i would have used to make back in my tiktok days but there's no way im opening that app by my own will again. so mutuals read this post.

last place/ugliest cover first.

the stock photo. literally what is going on here. the font is practically unreadable and makes no sense. the image itself looks like someone pulled it right off shutterstock. its giving my middle school vsco account. why are there three women on the front? the story is primarily about two guys and one girl. i mean there is a second female pov but she's not part of the polycule. font is clean but ugly. bye.

the movie poster one. i have so much beef with this cover, even as a movie poster. they literally took three screenshots of the movie and overlayed them into a weird collage type thingy. why is colin farrell standing like that?? why is the character jonathan in the back?? it's giving disney channel. it's giving early 00s--in a bad way. no rights at all. 🍅🍅🍅

the perks of being a wallflower one. i guess there was a craze for late 90s books to have typewriter font in the middle of a minimalistic cover?? i hate minimalistic, abstract covers. you could choose to tell us something about the book but no. here is an orange circle and a black circle. okay.

the modern cover (i assume). i like the watercolor and how it's not too busy but there's still a discernable image (unlike a CERTAIN cover i just discussed...🙄). the font kind of fucks up the whole thing though. it doesn't match the vibes of the book at all. it's very new-adult-romance and just feels off. because yeah technically the book is about new adults and their relationship drama but it's not this...cute.

the uk cover (?). the quality of this image sucks but i literally could only find it on abebooks.co.uk so. it's not bad, just really busy. the font has a shadow so it can be readable but that makes it feel even more cluttered. i like how the angel statue makes an appearance, but all the colors and how bright it is just makes it feel like a little too much.

the color burned one. honestly while i like the vibes i'm not quite sure who this lady is supposed to be. that looks like a wing so she's probably the white angel statue, but she looks too human. and angels aren't different colors like that. i like how this is simple and black, very classy. but ultimately it doesn't really make a lot of sense.

the grey one. this is simple, but nice. it's dark but with light shining behind the house--a nice balance of hardships but also hope, which fits the story. there's a swingset, which makes sense given the story is about growing up, in a sense. and there might have been a swingset at the actual house in the book. can't remember. the font is clean. a little sci-fi/futuristic for my taste but that's alright i guess. this is the cover i have. i guess i should be lucky it's not one of the previous ones but i really wish i had the next one...

the first edition. look it's classy. it's gothic. the angel is there. the sky looks like it could be ohio or nyc. there's powerlines. the font is stylish but not over the top. it's not too bright. it's slaying. one of my favorite things about this cover is how it emphasizes the angel, because the book itself was written around michael cunningham's seminal short story "white angel" which i have talked about a lot on this blog. it also is in a similar pose to the actual angel statue it was based on, the black angel of iowa city (shown below). i'm a fan. i wish i had this cover soooo bad<333

~~~

overall thoughts: most of these covers are kind of shitty lol. this book deserves better</3 if one of y'all live in the US, dont care much about covers, and want a free copy of this book i'll send my copy (the grey cover) to you for free just so i can buy the top ranked one on ebay lol. anyways if u got to the end and found this at all entertaining, tell me so. this was fun to do except when tumblr deleted the whole thing and i had to remake the entire post!!! lol!!!! and y'all should read this book because it's very good and very messy queer and i adore it deeply. <3

[marybeatriceofmodena]

You seem to know so much about phantom and its history in general and this is probably such a stupid question I’m sorry but why the fuck have they closed it on Broadway and the west end? No matter how much I think about it it makes no sense to me that it’s not bringing in enough money bc if people aren’t seeing what are they seeing????? Just close all of NY and London down at this point like ? And now I’m feeling like I should have seen it at least one more time since the news came out but the first time was so perfect I didn’t want to ruin it. But I’ve just been feeling like it’s a publicity ploy? They’re gonna say they’re taking it off then bring it back in 5 years shinier… but no one else seems to think so. Now I’m feeling like an idiot for not seeing it 5 times in a row even though it’s in my back yard.

Anyway. I’m sorry just had to get that out somewhere I’m sorry it was to you

Okay, so, right off the bat - the West End production is technically still running. It's not exactly like the original, but it's still there (and it has a VERY solid cast as of now so I would still absolutely recommend to go and see it if you ever have the opportunity. If you're scared of getting the restaged tour, it's really not that). There are a few differences with staging, the wigs are different from what they used to be, the orchestra has been reduced, some of the choreography is a bit different - but it's largely the same show.

What *did* happen in the West End was that like all productions, it closed during COVID, the cast and crew waited to be able to go back, and Cameron Mackintosh (aka the producer, aka Satan) invited all of them to a Zoom call, where they learned that they were all fired and that they'd be replaced by a new cast and crew. That included people who worked in the orchestra for nearly 30 years, Philip Griffiths who played Reyer since, like... forever, and I'm skipping a bunch. The reason why CamMack did that was to reopen with a smaller orchestra, a few reductions here and there, and obviously, with a younger cast and crew working around, salaries will be lesser on the basis of experience. And understandably, a lot of people didn't want to come back and go through the whole hiring/auditioning process all over again. Philip Griffiths for instance basically went: "Fuck it, I played the role for 30 years and I shouldn't have to audition for it" (and he's correct).

Obviously, COVID has been tough on the arts industry in general, and there are several shows on Broadway who closed as a result of it (the whole deal with The Music Man revival with Hugh Jackman was to make as much money as possible to recoup for losts, because anything that has Hugh Jackman in it or The Music Man itself has always sold very well on Broadway). Phantom was not one of those shows that was struggling, because it's kind of like Wicked, Chicago, Hamilton, or any Disney show in the sense that it will reliably make money no matter what. It's expensive to set up and stage as opposed to, say, Six, but it still very much made a profit.

Cameron Mackintosh didn't really give a reason as to why he was closing it (at least none that I'm aware of, or if there is, it's probably PR fluff), but if I had to make a guess, it's probably going to reopen in a few years, just like the West End production did, but with the reductions I've mentioned above, with a cheaper orcheatra, cheaper crew, etc. and you get a nice little opportunity to have it get nominated at the Tony Awards for Best Revival.

So yeah anyway eat the rich

[kanzakurawrites]

What are your honest unpopular opinions on Descendants?

I honestly don't know if any of these are unpopular, but here goes.

I wasn't bugged by the royal wedding or the engagement in the third film. The whole heir and spare thing is a legitimate practice and since Ben has no siblings and it seems to be unknown who's next in line (Chad mentions not knowing in the second film, and as the son of Cinderella he really should know the succession line), he pretty much needed to get married as soon as possible, especially with the villains taken into consideration (he has already been kidnapped). Their adults, financially stable, and true loves, so in the Disney realm it really does make sense for them to marry.

I don't really like Doug. I mean, he's okay... but something about him just rubs me wrong and I really wish Evie didn't end up with him in the end. I think it would have been nice for Evie to become confident in herself and find her place in Auradon before "finding a prince." Maybe Doug would have been an okay thing, if the relationship had began as a friendship in the first two films and only started a romance in the third movie vrs. the whole "I love you" thing and them apparently being true love? I don't know, I'm lowkey convinced that he was faking being asleep. (Also, if Evie was to fall in love with someone it would have been nice for it to be a person who had no ties to her mother's story. I guess I kinda understand, it could be sweet, maybe a little Romeo and Juliet without the tragic ending, or with it if the relationship didn't work out. But yeah...)

I like Mal. I don't like everything about how she was written, as some of it feels inconsistent, but I like her. I'm also not angry about the love potion in the first film. The VK's were raised by villains. What Mal did wasn't good, but its something she can learn from. It would have been nice to see Ben and Mal's relationship grow differently, not as quick and a bit more tentative because of it, but its a DCOM what do you expect?

While I'm on the fence about watching the new Descendants film, Chad having a sister isn't something I found shocking. As stated above, heir and spares are real. It makes a lot more sense for all of the royals to have multiple children vs. one for each couple.

I like the third film. (Though I very well might be biased as I love the Hades storyline XD)

I was not surprised or upset by Hades being Mal's father. I actually like it. Yeah, Mal is probably overpowered, but I'm here for it. Now if only we got to see powers she would have inherited from her dad...

I was not a fan of D2 Mal's hair, and while the dark root of the wigs in the third movie bug me SO MUCH that even though I like how Mal's hair gained blue I would have preferred the wigs and styles from the first movie being brought back.

Descendants would have been better as a teen/young adult tv series, either live action with a large budget, or an animated series. Some music could still be in it, but not excessively either.

I probably have more, but this is what I got off the top of my head and I'm still not even sure if they are unpopular.

[farty-city]

watching the new doctor who special bc this is, first and foremost, a dw fan account. blogging my thoughts

Episode 1

i’m a bit weary of reboots and stuff and i know this will be self indulgent but i have hope bc rtd but we’ll see

i forgot they made donna part of a swirl relationship

omg angst

did rtd manage to make dw child friendly and also profound

well i’m sure they also had to tone it down bc disney

ong they killed her

wtf r the next two episodes gonna be about

omg they made rose like… woah

omg

wow

what if i got emotional

the non binary thing with donna’s rose was like.. lazy tho

i liked the maternal metacrisis solution tho

and they’re going back and rewriting the doctors sexuality but i will excuse it because it’s rtd and an openly gay doctor would have been a hard sell in 08, i guess. also he had that thing with rose

i do partly feel that they were relying on the past grandeur and lore of the show which obviously worked on me but like i generally think it’s lazy

Episode 2

THIS EPISODE IS CRAZY

rtd did not dissapoint

i liked the beginning with newton

the Creaturss r so good

that scene of ten screaming and yelling and hitting the grate me lmao

this is crazy wow

they made them look so fucked up ddujfgjjjfg

what is the mavity

THE FUCKING BREAK INTO THE GALLOP cjfjdjdjd

oh no oh fuckkkkk

oh my god

rtd will threaten to kill the main characters and it will work every time

yeah this one is probably the best out of the three

idk maybe i’m biased bc i liked the plot but the character building and the writing from an objective standpoint with the theme of the mini series binaries and what we hide away and what happens when we are reflected back to ourselves, and how it is distorted- representative of how we see our own self. u know

but mavity tho … was it just for laugh or at i’m i missing something

Episode 3

o fuck i forgot nph was in this ..:/

his fake german lsnjds

doctor who has ai wtf what is that robot

oh this is interesting…

oh god it’s about privacy in the digital age and screens

there’s an evil puppet hiding in our screens

what an interesting social critique..

All World Leaders Are Being Affected By The Giggle

the toy maker concept is actually pretty interesting and definitely reminds me of like the literary jester i just feel like they were relying too much on the toy makers mystique to impress us

women and gender studies majors would have massive words to say about the doctor birthing scene

the catch scene is actually pretty cool

the puppet as a symbol for the biblical christ , the toymaker, the all knowing Creator

and i did like what rtd was trying to say as far as rage and believing you are right

omg ten hugging 15(?)

our blobo finally got the hug he needed

the master callback yes down to the nail polish

good 2 know a twink will still be speed walking around the tardis

so ten got his family and his happy ending…

now ether are two tardis’s. they’re fucking with canon, but its not new.

[sweettjrose]

Detective Mickey Pilot P.1

So I made a post earlier about what other Mickey and Friends content they will make due to the most likely end of the Rudish shorts. Personally, I am really hoping we don’t get another drought like before with only the pre-school cartoons coming out. I really like these characters and think they deserve content. And it seems like others agree as that is probably my most popular post on here (Though I barely post on here lol)

One idea I mentioned was a Detective Mickey series, taking place in the modern day, that is inspired by the comics made by Floyd Gottfredson and other Mickey comics, including the Topolino series, but also references Mickey and Friends lore in general. Being less of an adaption and more of its own thing. It is honestly such a great way to expand on the Disney characters in more of a dramatic sense after the Rudish shorts expanded more on a comedic sense. Plus it explores a piece of Disney media that deserves more attention.

So with all that said, I had a pilot idea that has been bouncing around my head and I just feel like I need to share it. This would be the first couple of episodes (Kind of like what both Ducktales did) that is inspired by the comic “Mickey Mouse Outwits the Phantom Blot”. 

Keep in mind this is just an idea, and not what I think should be the only way to go about it. Tbh there are so many ways this kind of show could go. I had to split this whole thing into parts, because of how big it got and how much I wanted to share. I would love to hear your thoughts and maybe I can share other ideas I had for this show if it existed, if you are interested or have any questions.

Next Part: X

I also made an improved version of this story. If you want to read it (I really recommend it) check this out.

The show will start off with what appears to be a quiet night. We zoom into a fancy-looking museum where two figures are talking while going down the elegant and large halls. One appears to be a high-ranking security guard and the other one is in fancy attire. The security guard is assuring the other that the security system protecting the emerald (This would have a better name, but isn’t important now) is one of the best in the world and that there is no way any villain or criminal is getting through. As they discuss this, the security system is being shown off, being pretty impressive and thorough. The fancy one still appears nervous however and states that the emerald has very special properties and that if anyone gets their hands on it, who knows what they could do. They even start name-dropping some villains, almost saying the Phantom Bl-, before being silenced by the security guard. The guard assures them that they are 100% confident that there is absolutely no way anyone can get this emerald, including any creeps in cloaks… 

As they say that they stop to where the emerald is or rather was… The cushion where the emerald was once placed has an emerald-shaped dent with a note left on top. The note reads something along the lines of

“I was hoping for a bit of a challenge, but left rather disappointed. I guess that is never in the cards for me. Perhaps next time you won’t BLOW it up.

Sincerely"

The letter was signed with a couple blots of ink. The classic signature of the infamous master criminal. Both are shocked with the security guard furiously calling for back up saying that the Phantom Blot has been here, without realizing that they are stepping into a tripwire which leads into a hissing sound. The one in fancy attire hears the hissing and tries their best to warn the guard only for it to be too late. The once quiet night is now interrupted with the sound of a loud explosion and a cacophony of sirens as police cars swarming the area. Any public who happens to be out at night frantically looks around in fear, knowing that some villainy must be near. The camera pans up to a shadowy figure in a black as night cloak and two glowing white eyes standing on top of a building overlooking the mess. You can’t see his face, but you get a sense that he is grinning as he chuckles to himself, pleased to see the explosion and the chaos that surrounds it, with an emerald in his hand. 

We then cut to what appears to be reporters reporting on the emerald theft, but then it evolves into reporting on other crimes of the Phantom Blot and then not just reports but interviews and public accounts. Essentially they explain that the Phantom Blot is one of the most nefarious criminal masterminds in the world. Always seeming 100 steps ahead of any police or law enforcement organization and is able to make the most challenging heists seem like child’s play. This Phantom Blot has never been captured and has never failed, running his schemes nearly perfectly with impunity, often taunting and teasing law enforcement as if this was a game to him. He is feared by the public, but adored and respected by other villains (with a couple of exceptions, but that would be explored in other episodes). He has waitlists full of criminals who dream of working with him on the few times he gathers a team. Mostly drawn to his charisma and leadership but also knowing that with him that failure is a rarity. Many wonder if this evil genius is truly as invincible as he appears or if maybe someday there can be someone who can stop the Phantom Blot. 

This is where Mickey fades into view. He is currently asleep though not for long after being awakened by an alarm clock (looks like the classic cartoon clock) and jumps out of bed excitedly saying that today is the day. He goes to fix breakfast and feed Pluto with a large smile beaming on his face. Pluto, while happy that he has more food, is a bit confused by the sudden excitement from Mickey. That is when Mickey tells him that today is the day that things change. He mentions that he finally found a way to convince the Editor in Chief to stop giving him busy work and to let him take on the real stories. He even mentions having a secret weapon thanks to Minnie as he pulls out a white box from the fridge. Thinking about Minnie he checks his phone and looks at pictures of her together, reminiscing on how lucky he is to be her boyfriend, being high school sweethearts and together ever since… That is when he notices that the time on his phone doesn’t match the time on his appliances… Shoot, Daylight Savings Time, he was so focused on working on his special project that he completely forgot to change his appliances… Including his alarm clock which means that he is LATE… He rushes out the door… Realizes that he is in his pajamas… and then comes back in his clothes (looks similar to what he wears in the Topolino comics but with a white spotted red bowtie) and makes sure to grab a camera (similarly colored) to put around his neck and the white box… He tosses, gently, the white box, into the car and rushes out of the driveway. Going as fast as he can… Within the speed limit.

This is where the name of the show will appear. (Detective Mickey is the current placeholder title) Mickey will drive through the town as various gags take place and we can see some characters. We can see Mickey’s Neighbor Mrs. O’Hara wave goodbye to Mickey, Goofy and Pete who seem to be discussing something while taking Max and PJ going to school, Sylvester Shyster walking off with a sinister grin on his face, Clarabelle outside of a bakery she appears to own, Horace who is coming out of some kind of Amazon-like Pick up place carrying a large number of boxes, and a couple of other characters that are callback or will be referenced in later episodes. Once he is parked, the best he can, he rushes into a building that says “Mouseton Argus”. He instantly bumps into someone through the door, destroying the white box and causing pieces of cream and pie crust to splash out. Mickey looks up to see the person he crashed into is… Ugh, Mortimer… Mortimer of course takes this chance to mock Mickey and brag about how he just came back from another successful interview after catching his 3rd set of crooks that month. He reminisces about how ever since he started that Private Investigation firm, he has been having nothing but success while Mickey gets people their coffee. Mickey of course retorts that he does more than that and things will change soon. Mortimer of course laughs it off, before licking a piece of cream from the white box that flung out onto his cheek. He instantly recognizes it as one of Minnie’s Banana Cream Pies and asks for a slice only for Mickey to tell him to shove it. He then retorts that he’ll just stop by her place and ask for a pie and hey maybe ask her to get a new boyfriend too. Mickey rolls his eyes as he enters the building.

Mickey stops by his office to pick up a laptop, which is more of a corner with a kiddie table and chair, and immediately heads over to what appears to be the office of the Editor in Chief at the Mouseton Argus, ignoring all the glares and comments about him being late. He comes in apologizing for being late, but mentioning that he has something the Editor will want to see. He then shows a presentation on his laptop of various pictures that Mickey took and other demonstrations of his skills. Mickey goes straight into the presentation, trying to convince the man that he has enough experience to start joining the journalists on bigger stories and to move up from a Junior Assistant Photojournalist in Training. Unfortunately, the other man doesn’t look pleased and tells Mickey that he doesn’t think he is up to the task. Mickey tries to bring in the destroyed banana cream pie, but that doesn’t change anything as he continues to explain that just because Felicity is Mickey’s sister and she was one of the best journalists they ever had, enough to move away to a larger city and work on national news, doesn’t mean that he will get special treatment, heavily implying she was the only reason Mickey got hired in the first place. Mickey tries to interject. But is met with more criticism as the Editor mentions that they are nice enough to even let him make a cartoon for the funny pages, but when it comes to journalism he even wonders if Mickey is good enough to be a journalist. This unfortunately is the final point that leaves Mickey defeated as he takes back the pie, only for the Editor to stop him… So that he could leave the pie, but also to get him a coffee as Mickey was late this morning and thus missed getting him his morning coffee. Mickey sighs and solemnly goes to do so. When he returns with the coffee, he sees a couple of journalists inside the Editor in Chiefs office talking with an intern, who gives off major slacker teen vibes. They appear to be inviting the intern to go with them on a story as it would be a great learning experience. The Editor agrees and says that he supports him 100%. The teen shrugs and dispassionately agrees, bringing up the fact that the Editor in Chief is his uncle, which leads to cheers. This is the final straw for Mickey as he leaves the coffee on the desk and sulks back to his “desk” in despair.

The next scene immediately starts with a shocked Minnie who is very upset at the information that Mickey gave her. They are at a nice restaurant, clearly on a date. Minnie mentions that Mickey shouldn’t let them treat him like that and whether she should go and give the Editor in Chief a “Talk”. Mickey immediately lets her know that it will not be needed, but that he appreciates it. Minnie clarifies that she just wants to help given the fact that when she was getting nasty comments from her peers about her bow-centric fashion, Mickey was there to support her all the way. She believes in him just as much and knows that he will accomplish great things and wants the best for him. She even wonders whether Mickey should work somewhere different since they clearly don’t respect him there. Mickey reminds her that being a journalist was a dream of his and his sister and how they bonded over journalism. His sister started her own local paper as a kid and let Mickey take the pictures and draw the comics, while she focused on writing articles. He doesn’t want to give that up and let her down over some bullies at work. And the “Mouseton Argus” is the best news source in Mouseton and the best way for any journalist to get anywhere. Minnie sighs seemingly confused about what else to do, but then a smile grows on her face as she appears to have an idea. She brings up that since they won’t let Mickey be part of the bigger stories, why doesn’t he just find one on his own. Mickey grows a smile of his own as he thinks about the idea and adds that he can ask his neighbor Chief O’Hara to see if they have any unsolved cases he can look into. Minnie cheers on the idea and even mentions making some of O’Hara’s favorite lemon bars to help. They then continue to excitedly talk into the night coming up with new ideas and just enjoying the night together.

We now jump to another day as Mickey is heading into the Mouseston Police Department. He is carrying what appears to be a plate full of lemon bars. He goes to the lady at the desk and asks if he could see Chief O’Hara as they are neighbors and has a delivery for him. The lady ignores him and Mickey mentions to say it is from Mickey Mouse. She ignores him again until he gives a confused “please”. That seemed to do the trick as she told him to sit on the chairs in the lobby and that she’ll let O’Hara know that he’s here. Mickey thanks her and immediately heads over, but not without noticing what appears to be a wall of wanted posters (perfect place for cameos and references to future episodes). He stares at all the criminals carefully observing each one, but notices there seems to be a larger poster covered by a couple of smaller ones. Almost instinctively he starts to move the posters out of the way, until realizing he isn’t tall enough to get the ones at the top. He then drags a chair, careful to not make too much noise, and is now tall enough to reach the posters at the top. As he removes the final paper the larger poster is fully revealed reading “BEWARE THE PHANTOM BLOT” at the top. Mickey looks deeply into the cold white eyes of the dark-cloaked figure shown and feels a sharp shiver in his spine, when he tries to step back to take it all in, he stumbles on the chair he was standing on, immediately getting the lady at the desk to bark at him. He apologizes and looks again at the poster, still feeling unnerved. He comments to himself “Boy, I would hate to meet this guy” “Yeah I think anyone would”. Mickey jumps again on the chair, getting another angry glare from the secretary. 

He looks to the source of the other voice recognizing Chief O’Hara. O’Hara looks tired, but happy to see him. They greet each other and Mickey hands him the lemon bars, much to O’Hara’s excitement, and asks if they could chat. O’Hara mentions that they are really busy, but you know what he can squeeze in a few seconds. It would be nice to not think about work for a little bit and to chat with a friend. He leads Mickey to his office as the entire police department seems to be in chaos with officers and others rushing around in the background. Mickey inquires about what may be going on and O’Hara alerts him that a federal inspector is coming soon and they are trying to be prepared for it. They eventually reach O’Hara’s office with O’Hara sitting down and already digging into the lemon bars. He realizes what is happening and apologizes to Mickey and asks what he wanted to tell him. Mickey tells him about how he is wondering if O’Hara has something he can investigate for his job. O’Hara inquires as to whether they aren’t giving him anything at work, and Mickey sheepishly gives some excuses though O’Hara’s seems to understand what is actually happening. He says that he is glad to help as Mickey was always helpful to him even as a trouble-making kid. He remembers Mickey solving the case of “Mrs. O’Hara’s missing Orchids”, which ended up being the other neighbor's dog. Even comments that he is surprised Mickey didn’t become a detective given his strong observation and deduction skills. He then focuses back on the original conversation and mentions that due to the inspection all of the cases are being handled to increase the number of completed cases, much to Mickey’s dismay. He apologizes until a flash of recognition hits his face as he remembers that they just got a recent call about something. Apparently, a pawn shop is reporting a missing camera. According to the caller, it just disappeared one night with absolutely no traces of theft. O’Hara remarks that since the person reporting was elderly it is possible they misplaced it. Also in these cases, they just see if it was confiscated by a recently caught criminal or is on a suspicious Ebay (Or Ebay equivalent) listing and if not found after a week just assume it is lost forever. But maybe Mickey could look into this, it could lead to something. Mickey of course is glad to have anything and takes the case immediately. Noting that we all have to start somewhere. 

And with that, Mickey thanks him and runs off with the address of the Pawn Store, excited about all of the possibilities laid out for him. This could be his big chance. A chance for everything to change for the better. A chance for him to get the recognition for his efforts. A chance for his dreams to finally come true. That is if he didn’t immediately run into Detective Casey knocking him down. Casey tells him to watch it as he has important work to do as Brick helps him back up. Mickey apologizes profusely before running off as Casey shoos him away. Brick asks who that was and Casey mentions that it was probably no one important.

~ So that is part 1, this ended up being a lot longer than I expected. But again I wanted to get it out as best as I can. I tried to make it shorter by cutting the dialogue. But I would love to hear what you think. I think there may be 4 other parts, unless they also end up getting too long, so we’ll see. Thank you for reading!

[cartoonfangirl1218]

Hey, remember when I had a whiny self pity party a few months ago about my grad school. 

It’s back. 

You see, I had thought I reached a calm state of acceptance about it. Yes, it wasn’t what I wanted but it was still a good school. Its well known for writing for a reason, it will be fine. 

Then orientation happened. And nothing really bad came from it, the teachers all seemed nice and enthusiastic but I just left feeling worse I guess somehow. 

The writing workshops seem fine but just the other classes about publishing, it just feels like I’m playing pretend I guess. It’s more essays and more group projects that are supposed to prepare for the actual job and that’s the whole point of education I know. 

But god, the other program had you actually tour publishing houses. And there was a whole semester project where you got to work personally one on one with an editor to develop your novel and another semester with an agent to try to sell it to the publishing houses. 

You got to work, I want to work so badly instead of having these vague classes where homework is the stand-in for an actual chance inside the publishing world. 

And don’t even get me started on the internships. How this school is all about networking and we’ll get you connections and whenever I ask about job, the answer is always the goddam same. It’s always go to the career center. 

I did go to the career center in college and all the career center does is help you with your resume. Which is fine but I would like to actually add a job to my goddam resume instead of polishing up the nothing I already have. Because I know the problem is I having nothing on my resume because no one will fucking hire me since I have no experience like the worst circular dumpster fire. 

And no one is going to recommend me because I have to be an adult and do it myself, take initiative. I know that but god, everyone says you have to have connections or know someone so why can’t the teacher help me get in something. And I don’t mean the school literary magazine. I read that and I understood nothing of that pretentious poetry nonsense. Nothing!

But maybe I’m wrong, supposedly the alumni in the career center message boards always reply back. Maybe they’ll help. Or maybe it will be like the last time when I talked to three editors from Disney-Hyperion and Simon and Schuster (how’s that for initiative)That they’ll keep me in mind but you just to have keep working at it and maybe find local journals. And I’ll smile and say thanks, and they’ll smile and say they’ll remember but let’s face it, they probably won’t. 

And those local journals don’t even have the decency to reply with an automated rejection email because apparently that’s not a thing anymore. They just don’t answer at all. And I’m too polite to send a snarky email saying maybe they’ll hire me to rejection emails for them cuz they need it. Not that they’d reply to that anyone. 

And the ones that do answer and give me an interview then they cancel the interview because they don’t need anymore hires. Do they not fucking communicate?!?! How do they not know that the position isn’t filled when they offer someone an interview? Why do they have the internship sign still up! And this has happened to me three times. Three, what the hell. 

And the others, cuz only one had the decency to reject me outright told me they needed more personality. Omg this is internship, I’m probably just getting you coffee and checking emails. Do you really need my personality? My personality is whatever you want me to be because I just want to get hired. I mean I guess I could talk about how I like books but I really think you should have guessed that from the fact that I’m applying for your journal and that whole cover letter where I talk about my book blig, my library experience, and all that. But nooo that’s just my accomplishments, they want personality. 

Well my personality is in the middle of a meltdown between crying ion the toilet and punching someone in the face repeatedly. Thank you very very much! 

And my regular job search isn’t going much better with the aforementioned no rejection email thing. Or just not replying to emails. Or they want a high school student. Or it only goes to the Princeton Uni ones because they’re so special. Which will be ironic since the only job that I’m going to get is at the University store. Yes, maybe it’s a shitty temporary job, but I guess that’s a rite of passage and I want money. 

Yet it’s so so depressing at the same time because I know what my friends are doing. Ones in foreign exchange in Uruguay at a clinic. Ones working at a hospital. Ones in law school. They get to work, they get to be in the fields while I’m stuck in this online program in theoretical publishing land instead of the real thing. 

And I know I shouldn’t compare but it’s hard and then I have to talk to them and literally have nothing to say when they ask what’s new. Nothing is new. It’s read a little and depend on the day, do laundry or go food shopping. Or when I get the store job, I can add fold t shirts, stack t shirts, ring up t shirts, find my atrophied brain among the t shirts. Basically the same thing I’ve done all summer. 

Because how can I build a social life in an asynchronous program. Seriously? So many people yet the most superficial interactions. It’s not like real life and it’s not like fandom life where you already have a jumping off point and I must admit I suck at group situations. I need one on one but again, it’s all async so ffuuuuck. And don’t get me on local adult classes. They use to be $75, now they’re $210 for Beginner’s French, what sort of capitalist greed nonsense is this 

And let’s not even get to my love life, that will go down a depressing spiral just the same. And I have tried and maybe it’s the guys I’ve texted with but they suck at texting. I’m always initiating and it’s always one word in return and I cannot be the one initiating, I just feel I’m bothering you. And since I’ve stopped, it’s been months with nothing so clearly that’s a dead end too. 

I mean, people always go on in the internet age it’s so easy to communicate and noooo it’s not true! It’s not true! It’s not true! 

The only thing I’m excited about is doing a paralegal degree online. I’m not even interested in law! But at least it will feel like an accomplishment compared to this program.

Because maybe I’m not cut out for this. Maybe I’m not as good of a writer as I think I am. And I’m trying to be realistic that maybe I can be an editor but apparently getting into it is even harder than being a writer. Apparently just getting in that field is just hard and it sucks. And I could be a librarian but that involves learning math, it’s been three years since I did math, I can’t get back into, I can’t. The GRE has spoken. 

So I’ll be a paralegal and I just die a little inside. And my friends are all like why are you giving up on my dream and come on, you think I want to? 

I don’t! I know I would be good at it. I read 100 pages per hour, I’ve done interviews with authors, I wrote 100 posts for my book blog in 18 days and once did a 100 day streak of one post a day. Basically, initiative and I’m disciplined and bit obsessive which I would think they want. I’ve edited others work, I think I write pretty good emotional scenes with angst and humor, I’ve written in the voice of other authors, I’ve planned detail book series which is exactly in the job skills of a story editor. I would kill in this!

Maybe, I mean I don’t even know. Maybe it is harder than I think and I should try for something else but I don’t know because I’m not in that world, just theoretical land of school papers and essays, wasting my time when I could have learned to accept that dreams die long long ago. 

And yes, this is all very self pitying when I could transfer but what’s the point? What’s the point of sticking it out for a year and transferring. I should just suck it up and do the two years I’m paying for. Transferring wouldn’t solve the fact that Boston is too expensive to live in. That’s why my parents told me to accept this one, to stay home and save the money on rent and transportation. And take care of my grandfather and dogs. It was a sign they said, 

And I know it’s selfish to want otherwise. I mean I love my grandfather and I don’t want to be too far away if he, god forbids, dies but it hurts. It feels like I’m stuck in this false grown up world where I’m pretending that I’m going to actually earn something out of this vague program of busywork that will “prepare” me while everyone is out there doing things with their jobs full of purpose and fulfillment and life and cute guys and culture. 

And yeah, I just needed to scream it out there in the void of the internet where it can’t get back to my family. Then they’d just feel guilty (which maybe they should have thought about before undermining my decision but whatever, I’m trying to get over the resentment). But there’s some good stuff, like seeing my family and having my dogs. And I have the car so I can go to the library and movies and. . . Yeah that’s it. But my first Zoom class is today so maybe it’ll be better. Please be less empty than I think.  At least I got this all out in words instead of swirling in my head every time I go food shopping strangely enough.

[ben-talks-art]

Thought's on the finale of The Owl House

So now that the series is (sadly) over, I felt like talking about the finale a little since I think there are some interesting things in it to discuss.

Taking into consideration that this series was cut short and they had to do the best they could with the best they had, they still managed to deliver a pretty freaking good finale all things considered.

The animation was great, the storylines were all wrapped up, every character had one last moment to shine (although some were brief), and as always, you can feel a lot of the love and effort the creators are putting into the product.

Most of the problems I had are basically just a matter of wishing this could have had more room to breathe because plenty of things get solved a tad too quickly. It kinda makes me wish I could see a director's cut.

Almost all of the issues I can just accept and blame it on Disney for axing the show, but two in particular really make me go "this needed more time."

(spoilers)

The first one is the Collector.

This kid has been built up like crazy. The entire season 2 finale is basically trying to show how much of a big deal they are, how much trouble they can cause, how disconnected from reality they are, and just how immensely important it is that they get dealt with properly.

Even in the final scene of episode 2 of season 3, it ends with them going "I want to play a new game!" Dun! Dun! Duuuum!"

And then we see said game, and it's just a dream sequence to teach Luz a lesson we already new, followed by playing some games that just last for a few minutes.

Then the Collector gets a little sad, Luz talks to them, and they become friends...

That's it. That's the big climactic confrontation with one of the most powerful characters of the show.

Now, I will say, I did enjoy that they address that the kid just suffers from a lack of understanding of how mortal lives work, and I do appreciate they didn't just make them some raging, crazy kid who hates Luz because King likes her more. I'm glad they made them surprisingly reasonable and patient for their mental age.

Still, I can't help but feel their "defeat" and redemption arc were way too fast and easy. If I were to guess, the stuff with The Collector probably was meant to be its own entire episode, and the true final boss was another, but they had to shrink it due to the cancellation, and if that's the case, that's a real shame because I would really like to see a deeper exploration of this kid's way of thinking and seeing Luz trying to help them realize their errors.

As it is, it wasn't done badly, but I wish it had more.

I also don't like how when Luz gets "killed" the Collector is the one getting focused on and crying over her. Their bond is just not that strong to make these tears feel earned. It's like if in Lion King the one crying over Mufasa was Nala or Zazu instead of Simba. It's not the worst character to cry over her, but there were definitely better options to focus on.

However, I can forgive all that because the scene where they try to deal with Belos using the power of love was absolutely perfect and it made me laugh hard. That was definitely my favorite joke on the whole show.

And now, the second thing on the finale I'm kinda iffy about...

Belos comes back as the final boss (again), and kills Luz, resulting into her turning into literal orbs of luz that just start fading over time until they make their way to... King's dad.

Because why not?

Who just happens to be able to give her an "I win" button so she can go into her Super Sayan form (because every Disney show needs to have at least one character with a Super Sayan form now, not that I'm complaining)...

...and alongside Eda and King, they defeat Belos and save the day.

Now, first of all, Luz's titan form? 10/10! I absolutely, freaking love that design. I love that she's a combination of King and Eda being a mix of a witch and a monster, while also having her own side with all the glyphs floating around her. Plus, she has claws, and we all know that anything with claws is instantly cool. Definitely, my favorite super form from any Disney show. (Unless they make a Jake Long reboot and give him a super dragon form)

I also like how the animation just shines as they fight Belos (who now looks like a badass bone dragon creature), and how each of the main trio has a small moment to help in the battle, it isn't just Luz doing everything.

Not to mention they have an amazing remix of the opening theme playing in the background which just makes it even more awesome.

My favorite part is when they start to wonder where Belos' weak spot is and Luz says "You know where" and Eda just gives the widest, proudest, most joyful grim ever right before all voice actors give their all while screaming "THE HEART!"

It reminds me of Puss In Boots 2 where all the characters look like they're having fun while going through the adventure.

I kinda wish Luz could have had some cooler lines, but they tried to make a point that Luz is a dork that isn't very good at it so... Eh, I'll forgive it. I know she has her "Eat this, sucker!" thing, but I honestly completely forgot that that was even meant to be her catchphrase.

Honestly, this entire climax is amazing and just perfect for the series... But I kept thinking to myself "how in the world did Luz went from being a ball of light to meeting King's dad???"

I have no problems with what we got, I'm just not sure HOW we got it. The way Luz just went from nearly dying to just appearing in the place of the one guy that could help her save the day felt very Deus Ex Machina.

These are basically my only two problems with the finale. I wish we had gotten more time with the Collector and their arc, and that we had a bigger exploration of how Luz got there.

The way it is, it feels like the day was saved not because the heroes were smart enough, or strong enough to defeat the bad guy, but... Because the plot said so.

I mean, yeah, King's dad gave Luz the power because she was nice to his son, so you could say her kindness was what saved the day... But I don't know... Is that what Owl House's final theme is about? Being kind?

Owl House's themes for me were always about being creative, being weird, not being afraid of experimenting new things, thinking outside of the box, and learning to observe and listen, and not being afraid of accepting who you really are.

I wish these themes had played a bigger part in the defeat of the final boss, like in Gravity Falls where what allows them to defeat Bill is Stan's willingness to sacrifice himself for his family.

Luz and King have a great relationship and the fact that she is a wonderful older sister to a little monster does tie into the theme of accepting others and not being afraid of trying weird things... But I'm not sure if I like how that's the final message we leave the show on.

I guess I just wish that King's dad would have had a bigger build-up. If maybe while dying Luz would have used her creativity one last time to somehow get her to teleport into the Titan, then I would have been more okay with it.

This show seriously needed more episodes...

Still, even though the build-up was kinda rushed (to me at least), the pay-off was so good that I can't really get too upset about it.

Again, titan Luz was everything I never knew I wanted in my life (there is gonna be so much fan art of that form on the internet). If a slightly confusing solution is the price that needs to be paid to get such an epic form and such an epic climax like that, I'll gladly take it.

[moonstone27ls]

Marvel comics...

heh small vent so don’t look into this too much.

Normally I don’t really get annoyed. At most I only really got upset when they retconned the Maximoff twins as Magneto’s. But every now and then stuff has changed that makes me go “whatttt”

I guess for starters that X-men Krakoa storyline. Has gone wayyyy too long. Too many characters which would not be so bad but too many to keep up with. And they don’t even bother catching up with the other characters. No I don’t mean the obvious main core cast. Referring to lets see I guess an example would be uhh Icarus, brother to Cannonball(to anyone who isn’t a marvel fan sorry you’re reading this and probably thinking I’m nuts). I heard some of the writers had thought of having him date Dust/ aka Sooraya Qadir. But ... as far as I know nothing has happened with his character since you know the whole resurrection crap. He’s kinda like a lot of characters they brought back, used for background maybe but no real development.

Another would be Kevin Ford/ Wither... as far as I know nothing either with that character. I dunno I thought they missed an opportunity to see if him and Selene would have interactions. Nothing, no “Oh whoa I was manipulated” or “I’m still loyal to Selene”. Then Northstar is apparently suppose to get his adopted baby resurrected... but haven’t heard a thing on that. One mention and its radio silence. I know storywise they got all these AUs, etc, etc. But so much goes on and all these new characters you forget there other X-men BESIDES the main core.

Uh not entirely fond that Marvel is apparently retiring Mary Jane as Peter’s love interest. Now before someone starts a shipping war with me. No I’m not entirely against Black Cat, no. Been use to her since the 90s.But I just you know added her in the cluster of love interests. A part of me doesn’t want them to shelve M.J. away. Just hope Marvel’s just doing this temporarily. Like how Scott/ Cyclops was with Emma Frost for a while. You’re use to the new gal but know the old love interest is just as important. I dunno I’m probably rambling sorry.

Anything else... uhh kinda find it strange that since WandaVision it seems Marvel is catering to Disney. I say seems. I only have two examples. Like how although Wanda was bettering herself and going on dates with Jericho Drumm / Doctor Voodoo... they still shoehorn in Vision. Pft... sorry Wandavision fanatics but I don’t care for Vision. That is a ship I wanna see retire, because it was always the SAME with them. Wanda loves him, he either gets reprogramed or treats her like crap Wanda goes through hell. Its why I couldn’t really like Wanda in MCU she put people in hell over a STUPID robot she couldn’t get over... not her twin brother. Her robot a robot if, he was so smart could have downloaded a copy of himself. (its been done peopleeee) 

And recently Agatha’s gonna be a villain now... I admit I’m not a 100% caught up in her history comic wise. Buttt... up until hat stupid show. I always got the impression Agatha was an ally. Soo why do this now? I dunno I really don’t oO. That one felt like to cater Disney+ subscribers and I admit that irks me a little. 

But oh well they need money I guess.