#if he didn't then his story wouldn't be nearly as tragic
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HEARTLESS 💔 - FINAL CHAPTER
Agent Whiskey (Jack Daniels) x f!reader
Summary: A wedding, a new addition to the family and revisiting memories finally bring the Daniels family their well-deserved happy ending ❤️
(This is the last chapter of the HEARTLESS 💔 series)
• YOU CAN READ THE ENTIRE SERIES ON MY MASTERLIST
Warnings: a tad bit of angst (but not really, it's mostly just expressing emotions and revisiting sad memories), mentions of suicidal thoughts, fluff, brief smut (more like mentions of it), tension, talks of becoming a widow, Wyatt and his baby sister being the most adorable kids in the world, happy ending ❤️
A/N: it took me so long to get this done, I guess nearly six months, I don't know, I feel I sort of lost my way with this story, but I had to come back and finish our cowboy adventure, give them their happy ending. I love you all and I really hope you enjoy this chapter, I thank you everyone who has followed this story and showed me support through all these months of writing! It wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you ❤️🫶
12.6k words
Nothing could have prepared you for the reaction your cowboy had the moment you broke the news to him you were pregnant - or rather he found out about it by spotting the test boxes in the bathroom trash. You had been worried about everything, so many scenarios running through your head, always anticipating the worst and making you fear each single measure he could take. Just to have a grown ass cowboy on his knees before you, his face resting against your womb as he blinked away the tears that insisted on flooding those brown baby cow eyes of his. He just worshiped you, mumbling so many words you couldn't quite tell what they were, but the way he looked up at you, as if you were his whole world, made your heart skip a beat. It was a terrifying change, but you oddly didn't feel scared, not at that moment, not when you had Whiskey at your feet, showing he wasn't going anywhere, he was committed and devoted to you, to his family, a family that was growing, just like that tiny little seed in your womb, that was going to grow into a full baby, a blessing to that undeserving man, something he prayed for every single night, there was nothing Jack Daniels wanted more than to be a good man to his family, to be the husband and the father you and the kids deserved.
The kids.
He chuckled to himself at the thought of it, something that seemed just like a distant dream short days ago, was now a reality, the fact Wyatt was about to become a big brother, and the overwhelming love he felt for his son, also multiplying towards his second child. It was also terrifying to him, to love someone he hadn't even met yet, and how that could be taken away from in the blink of an eye like it happened to him before. He shook his head, squinting his eyes unaware of the tears that rolled down his cheeks, chasing those thoughts away. Nothing would happen to his family, you, Wyatt and the little angel inside of you would be just fine, because that was his responsibility and he would fight for it until his last breath. You felt his tears against your bare skin and a gut feeling told you exactly what he was thinking about, you didn't want him suffering for that, things wouldn't be as tragic as they were, Jack Daniels was a heavily traumatized man, who lived in fear of losing his family by not being good enough to protect them. You couldn't let your cowboy suffer in anticipation like that, so you pushed him gently, sitting on the floor to face him in the same eye level and stroked his cheek, the way his eyes were red with tears and he sniffed even if he tried his best to control his emotional reaction, reminded you so much of Wyatt, your son being the tiny little version of him. You placed your lips on Jack's forehead, then you went to his cheek kissing his tears away and finally to his lips, never breaking eye contact, at the same time he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you as close as possible, needing the reassurance only your touch could provide. You kept your cowboy so close to your heart, taking deep breaths and letting his presence sink in, finally realizing how much you'd missed your cowboy, spending days apart from him. You had been so deep into your own thoughts after finding out about the pregnancy you completely neglected the side that craved your cowboy with you. You wanted to hold him, kiss and make love to him, but at that moment, you could see the vulnerability in his eyes.
It broke your heart; Jack was a strong, fearless man towards anything that did not involve his family. He was able to take down dozens of enemies in a fight, he could face the most furious bull in a ring, he didn't fear death or pain when he was out in the world protecting a nation that didn't even know they were in danger to begin with, but he was not that brave when it came to his sugar and his son, and especially not once they added a baby into the mix. One could call him paranoid, but he was just not willing to take the slightest risk, it had happened once, it wasn't going to happen twice.
"Sugar, I-”
His voice cracked, he had tears in his eyes, threatening to spill at any given second, he wanted to promise you, word it out loud how hard he would fight for you, for your relationship as a couple, your upcoming wedding, he wanted to assure you you could splurge as much as you wanted, choose whatever made you happy, he wanted to throw himself at your feet like the dog he was, he wanted to cry and beg your forgiveness even if he had already done that before, more than once, and even if you, out of your superior state of grace, had forgiven him. He wanted to tell you he knew he wasn't worthy of you, but he wasn't strong enough to keep away, he wanted to swear you and the kids would be forever safe, he would do anything you wanted him to: quit Statesman, throw away all his lassos and whips, he would become a goddamn farmer if it were up to you. He wanted to thank you for bringing sense into his life again, for robbing him from those depreciating, suicidal thoughts. He wanted to thank, and beg and promise you, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything at all, all he did was blinking his tears, letting them run down his cheeks. You knew it, you knew it all, he didn't have to say it, you could feel it from his heart to yours. Caressing his cheek gently, you nodded, leaned towards him and kissed his lips once more.
"I know cowboy, I know it”
•••
The slight noise of crayons sliding through a sheet of paper filled your ears and brought your attention back to reality. You focused your eyes on the bright colorful shades that added a meaning to a confusing drawing Wyatt was finishing. A pillow under his bum so he could be tall enough to use the coffee table as his personal art table, while he glanced at his baby sister, Rosie, who rested in her baby seat and watched attentively her big brother's every move. The eight-month-old cooed and kicked her little legs, wanting Wyatt's attention back at her, their bond being as strong as it was the day she was born, he giggled at her.
"Calm down, Rosie… I will continue the story in a minute” he said in his smart pants way and turned his head at you, knowing something was up. Wyatt was only six - proudly going 7 in a few months, but he was able to tell whenever you were lying to him. He'd asked if you were alright a couple of times in the last hour, and you'd said yes. But you clearly weren't fine.
Dropping his crayons, he got up and walked towards you, bright brown eyes staring into yours and a comforting smile.
“What happened, mommy?”
“N-nothing happened, honey… why don't you go and keep telling Rosie the story… What story was it?”
"The story of us before she was born…” he said proudly and you let out a chuckle, of course he would want his little sister to know her origins and tell her everything that happened in the months that followed your wedding proposal up to her birth. You allowed yourself to stop the mental torture and point at Rosie who kept cooing in order to have Wyatt talking to her as she loved. As much as the sight melted your heart, a heavy weight in your chest stopped you from taking another breath without feeling pain. Jack should have been there with you. He should be sitting right next to you, playing with his kids and giving you all sorts of dirty smirks hinting at what would go on in your shared bedroom once the kids were off to dreamland. But he wasn't, and you swallowed hard every time you thought about it. You hadn't lied to Wyatt at all, when you said nothing happened; because nothing indeed had happened, the real problem was that something should have happened. He should have declined Champ’s request for a last mission, and being the stubborn cowboy he was, when he got there, he should've killed his enemies straight away, he should have answered Statesman's official communication channels, and above all, he should have arrived home two days ago.
You didn't get contact from him and neither did the agency, even if they actually sent Ginger to your ranch so she would keep you company and make sure you weren't lost in bad thoughts, even if she stood in your kitchen making you a cup of tea, always offering you dozens of stories in which Whiskey managed to save the day and showed up at the last minute, it still didn't work, quite the opposite, it made it everything worse. But you had to remain strong for the kids, there was no reason to spread panic, even if you were feeling panic yourself, you couldn't do that to them.
You hugged your little boy tight, burying your face into his soft curls, and smiled, looking at your precious Rosie, picking her up from her seat and holding her gently.
"Go ahead, love” you told your son and Wyatt smiled, giggling and tickling her tiny little feet.
"So… after daddy found out you were a little seed in mommy's tummy…”
And at your son's sweet words towards your daughter, your mind drifted off to the memories he was taking so much pride in telling her.
•••
“Honey, it's okay, I'm fine, our baby is fine” You'd told your cowboy for the third time but he wasn't convinced just yet, it had been a silly little accident and nothing more: you’d been playing tag with Wyatt and Jack outside when a chicken running lose crossed your path and your tripped over it. Thinking in retrospect, it wasn't silly, it was plain stupid actually, but the moment Jack saw you tumbling, he ran towards you as fast as possible, immediately lifting you up and placing his hand on your belly. The pregnancy was now two months along, and your soon-to-be husband was always in a state of alert, just like a guard dog, he wouldn't leave your side unless it was strictly necessary to, and at any slight glimpse of danger - well, his exaggerated conception of danger -, he would be ready to act.
"Sugar please, you fell down, that's something pregnant women aren't supposed to do, let's just go to town, get you to the clinic, have one of those fancy ultrasounds exams and make sure everything’s fine. Afterwards, Wyatt can have one of those happy meals he loves and you can check up any remaining wedding details you'd like to”
You both knew there was no detail you hadn't double checked in the month and a half you'd found out about the pregnancy. Your wedding was all set and ready to take place - a week from then, at the Daniels’ ranch. Everything was thoughtfully chosen, organized and done despite how fast things were going. However, the fear in that man's eyes made you nod and agree to his request. You knew you were okay, just as your baby was okay, but he didn't, not when his worst nightmare haunted him every single day, giving him no breaks or concessions; the horror of losing yet another child taking away his logical rational side more often than he'd liked. So you did it for him, for your worried cowboy. For the cowboy who wouldn't keep his hand away from your small baby bump and would pray silently for things to be okay.
“Alright Jack, let's go”
You gave in to his request and allowed him to help you climb up the Bronco, along with Wyatt safely tucked in the backseat just a few moments after he ran inside to grab you and himself a jacket. Your heart clenched with an overwhelming wave of love, your family was so perfect it didn't even seem to be real. As you watched the ranch become smaller and smaller in the rear mirror, Wyatt played with some dinosaur toys in the backseat, you noticed the cemetery entrance Whiskey drove by; the same cemetery Gabriella was buried with her unborn baby and that brought another pang towards your chest. You thought of her and her baby, and the joy and expectations she must've had, you thought of your own cowboy, and how hard it must've been for him to receive the news that destroyed his life. Placing your hand on your womb, you stroked it gently. You weren't worried until then, but the cold realization of what happened to your fiance, was enough to spike the doubt. Life was going so well for you, perhaps too well, and you worried at some point the good wave of luck would die out. Thoughts wandered, but a heavy hand rested on your thigh, snapping you out of your thoughts. Jack glanced at you, still keeping his attention on the road, but making sure to look into your eyes.
"It's going to be fine sugar, our sweet little bean is here, safe and sound”
You nodded thankfully for his words and tried calming down, knowing you'd be in town soon.
You could list the most emotional moments of your life: your first kiss, your first love, the first time you ever saw that pathetic handsome cowboy, the instant you fell in love with him, your first time with your cowboy, the first time you exchanged love words, finding out you were pregnant with Wyatt, listening to his first heartbeats and you could spend a lifetime listing all of those moments. So you figured the moment you heard your newest baby's heartbeat for the first time, you wouldn't become too emotional, but you were definitely wrong. The moment the loud heartbeat filled the room, your heart raced like crazy, looking around you saw your cowboy's eyes filled with tears, a sweet smile as he leaned in and pecked your lips gently, at the same time Wyatt's happy grin also caught your attention. The way he clapped his small hands so excitedly and giggled.
“See mommy? Baby sissy is alright!”
He said happily, as he was sure he would get a sister, and turns out, he was right all along.
That night, after Wyatt was safely tucked into bed, Jack came over to you, a basket and blankets in hand, a shit eating grin as he cornered you and kissed your cheeks, before going south and getting to your neck. Goosebumps spread all over your skin, you knew exactly what he was thinking of and you couldn't help but chuckle. He was still your handsome, charming silly cowboy and you loved him with every fiber of your being. He didn't even need to say anything, just offering you his hand, knowing you'd take it without questioning and without further ado, you two were quickly running through the green grass of the ranch, escaping to your old getaway spot, the one you'd spend uncountable hours with your cowboy, just enjoying the sunlight or the moonlight, relaxing and hiding away from everything and everyone. The early stages of your relationship, where you didn't know if you and the cowboy would actually become something more than a steamy affair, before even dreaming of getting pregnant with his child and going through everything you did. You would both get into your favorite date place: the barn.
Just a blanket to make things comfortable, some treats to nibble on and all the love flowing through your veins.
"It's been so long since we came here” you told Whiskey, as he opened the door and welcomed you after him. He didn't say anything, not before pressing you against the wall and stealing a kiss. And that cowboy was hungry for you. The way his hands gripped your waist before roaming over you, his heavy breathing and a whole new discharge of hormones thanks to your pregnancy, got you so worked up, your hands sinking into the softness of his hair, his stetson lying on the floor at how fast your make out session started.
"Missed you, sugar.. it was about time we came up to our good ol' barn, ain't it right? Just us… ‘cause mommy and daddy gotta have their fun” Jack's heavy breathing was so enticing to you, the way he hungrily went over to your neck and without you even noticing him, he had set the blanket on the floor, making it a cozy place for the two of you to lie down among stacks hay. Smooth dirty cowboy, must've done that a thousand times. If those barn walls could talk, they'd certainly tell the most explicit erotic tales, ones out of many that were actually starred by you. However, there was no place for jealousy of the past, instead you focused on the bright future you got ahead of you and the known fact you were now the only one going to the barn with your cowboy. No other woman would touch him but you, and that was priceless.
By the time you were both finished with your round, all that was left was resting against each other's body. His arms firmly wrapped around you, short nails scratching up and down your naked back, at the same time you nuzzled his chest. His warm skin and his heartbeat, those small details reminding you it was real. Your happiness was real. Love overflowing you at all times and nothing could be better at that moment. As you shifted and lay on your back, Jack's hand immediately rested on your baby bump. It was still quite small, but you could both see it taking its shape, it was your child growing healthy and strongly inside of you. The mixture of you and the cowboy, the final proof your love was so abundant it flooded into something more. Whiskey's hand stroked your skin, a distant smile on his face, as so much went through his mind. He couldn't help but experience so many feelings at once: love, fear, excitement, regret, grief. All of that mixed up in the handsome mess he was. He couldn't wait to meet his sweet daughter, because just like Wyatt, he was also certain it was time for a baby girl Daniels to make her debut in the family, yet, he couldn't help feeling the bitter taste of regret, thinking of all the wasted time and opportunity he could've spent around you and baby Wyatt. Thinking of how he could've and should've been there for you and him. Your first pregnancy, how everything was so new and scary, how hard and stressful things were, how much you and your son needed him. He closed his eyes and silently prayed for forgiveness, trying to convince himself better late than never, which was true, but he could've been a better man. His mind also drifted to very old times, when he wasn't much more than a boy recently graduated from high school, a wedding ring shining and a beautiful, young and bright Gabriella expecting their baby boy. She was supposed to have gone to college that year, if she hadn't gotten pregnant, Jack knew she would've made a great lawyer, exactly like she dreamed of; he often blamed himself for robbing her of her bright future, even if he knew he would've managed to work and given her and their son the best life possible. It was a topic he discussed several times in therapy and grief counseling. At first, he was adamant about not wanting to do it, but Champ only gave him two options: either treat his old deep wounds, or leave Statesman behind and start over with no job, no money, no support. And he was being kind, because more than once Jack heard people telling straight up to his face he should be rotting in jail. The truth was that Champ was right, he needed to, he should've treated himself years ago, it made him understand and finally accept that no one was to blame, but the killers who ended Gabriella's and the baby's lives. It made him see, he had loved them with all his heart, but he was still alive and he was entitled to be happy, he shouldn't feel guilty about loving someone else, about wanting to build a life with someone other than Gabriella, and above all, he understood that his sweet Gabriella would want the same for him, because he was sure if he was the one who died that night at a convenience store, he would never wish her a lifetime of sorrow and grief like he led.
"I think you're miles away from here, Jack…” your voice had snapped him out of his thoughts and brought him back to reality, just as your touch, fingers running through his hair as he chuckled and nodded.
"Just thinking about life, that's all”
"You know I love you, right, cowboy?”
“I do, just as I love you sugar. With my whole heart”
He pecked your lips and then got to your belly, his mustache tickling your skin as he left a trail of little butterfly kisses on your bump.
“And I love you too, baby, with all my soft old heart, a broken heart fixed with so much love and patience by your beautiful mama, your handsome big brother and by you, because I'm sure you're daddy's little sheep”
•••
"... So when you still lived in mommy's tummy, daddy called you little sheep, because you were too tiny to be a cowboy and also a girl” Wyatt giggled at his own joke and cooed as Rosie clapped her chubby hands. Your kids’ genuine happiness and innocence filled your heart with love and pride, and the fact your cowboy wasn't anywhere Statesman looked for him, only fueled the worst fears and thoughts you had going on. Raising your two kids on our own wouldn't be impossible, you'd done it before with Wyatt, you'd been strong enough to do it, but that was not the occasion any longer. You wanted your cowboy by your side, Jack and you were meant to be, you were married now and you wanted nothing more than to stay with him for the rest of your life, to watch your kids grow and grow old with him. You loved him with all your heart and that lack of news was driving you insane. Turning to Ginger, she simply shook her head, still no sign of him, and it pierced your heart. You wanted your sweet handsome Jack next to you, so you could both enjoy your family.
"... And then Rosie, mommy married daddy and it was under the willow tree! Remember we played snowman last Christmas there?! Mommy looked like a princess! Mommy, tell Rosie you looked like a princess!”
Wyatt tugged at you and caught your attention again, you kissed your daughter's head gently and then stroked your son's beautiful face. He was the sweetest child you'd ever met, he'd been your best friend for so long, you just nodded at his words.
"And you tell Rosie you looked like a tiny little prince and walked mommy down the aisle!”
“So Rosie…, Mommy and daddy's wedding was so fun! Let me tell you…”
•••
The arrangements for the wedding weren't as complicated as you thought they'd be, not when you had Whiskey by your side, always willing to make your dream - and his, come true. No matter the decoration, the dress, the flower arrangement or the buffet. Anything was perfect for him, because at the end of the day, you'd be his forever, his wife, the mother of his beautiful children. You'd sign your name as Mrs.Daniels, just like Wyatt and your baby would. And he couldn't wait for that to become true.
Taking advantage of the fact it was awfully warm for December, you both decided to hold the wedding at the ranch, where you could fit all the guests - nothing too much, just friends, some relatives, fellow agents on Whiskey's part, anyway - and all the other things implied by a wedding: a beautiful altar, a nice dance floor and all the great amount of flowers your cowboy insisted on you gifting you with, roses of course, he loved those as a little boy because his grandma and mama loved them, and it's a commonly well-known fact that above being a Mama's boy, Jack Daniels had been a grandma's boy, which only made you love him even more. He was a roses man, and you knew with all your heart that a little Rosie was growing up in your belly, the perfect mixture of your love and the cowboy's, just like your handsome, precious son Wyatt, was.
The location chosen at the ranch could only be by the willow trees, such a special place for you and your family, it was bound to become even more special. It would be the place where you and Jack would exchange your vows of always loving each other and your family; it was beautiful. The directions were also perfect, the exact balance between simple and elegant. Nothing to be too much, just some fairy lights carefully placed on the trees, white chairs on the green field and several roses of all colors scattered all over the place. You'd always heard men didn't usually take part in those details, but your Whiskey couldn't be further from that; he loved spending every moment helping you decide what you wanted and giving some of his thoughts too. The cake tasting was also another happy occasion: Jack made sure to take you to the best bakery in town, you, him and Wyatt had the hard task of trying a little bit of every cake available in order to pick the right one for the party. You, trusting your boys’ fine taste, you let them pick the cake: strawberry and cream. Everything seemed ready for the two of you to tie the knot. The dress was also easy to find, you weren't picky, you wanted something pretty and comfortable, that would make your baby bump discreet and allow you to enjoy your special day. Taking Wyatt with you so he would help you choose the best outfit, you simply loved how attentive and sweet he was, all the time he clapped his little hands and giggles
"You look pretty mommy!”
That's what you'd heard the most those days.
Your handsome cowboy on the other hand, had his suit completely figured out: after inviting some of the Kingsman agents, Eggsy sent your fiance a special fine tailored suit, the kind that fit your cowboy so perfectly and it hung tight to all the right places. He looked so good, too good it was almost impossible to be able to hold yourself back and honor the agreement you'd both made to wait until the wedding to sleep together again. It was quite silly to do that, but you remembered being younger and reading somewhere about how having a dry spell a few days before the wedding could fuel the honeymoon even more. You and Jack decided not to travel for your special getaway, he was still very worried about your health, no matter how many times your doctor assured both you and him things were alright with mama and the baby. There was also the fact you didn't have anyone to leave Wyatt with as well, he was a kind and sweet child to be around, but he wasn't used to being away from you for more than just a couple of days. Your mom was completely out of the picture and you and Jack didn't really feel comfortable in hiring someone to watch your boy on such short notice. A couple of weeks at your ranch, enjoying the upcoming end of the year festivities, your family and taking care of your pregnancy didn't sound that bad at all, you were looking forward to it and each time you saw Whiskey, your heart fluttered, thinking of all the happiness ahead of you.
Two days before your wedding, Wyatt woke up sneezing and sniffling, you had warned him not to spend too long around the river with his dad, you weren't certain what kind of vegetation was that, but it was enough to strike an allergic reaction in your little boy; and since Jack had been out to go fishing and Wyatt wouldn't leave his side for two seconds, it was understandable he didn't wake up feeling great, which made you give him some antiallergics in order for him to feel better. It'd worked to an extent, if it weren't for the fact the antiallergic your son got was the drowsy kind and it put him down to sleep through the whole afternoon, so without Wyatt's usual presence around you, always playing or asking millions of those thoughtful and creative questions, you took some time for yourself, relaxing and lying on the couch, waiting for Whiskey to be home. Your future husband was as excited for the wedding as you were, he couldn't wait to say ‘I do’ and finally be able to be your husband, and yet, you could still see there were some days in which Jack's mind wandered and he seemed so lost in thought. Or late at night, it wouldn't be rare to get up to grab a glass of water and find him looking out the window, silently and reflexively, just staring into the darkness outside the window. You hadn't asked what was going on, suspecting it had to do with something extremely intimate, and that didn't worry you one bit, your love was strong and your cowboy was devoted to you, perhaps it was something to do with those ugly thoughts he dealt with a while back; although he'd assured you he still went to the his therapist appointments regularly and things were much better in that sense then. Eventually, you felt your eyes getting heavier and heavier, and you ended up dozing off, your body fully relaxed against the comfortable couch and the warmth of the sunshine coming through the big window.
The distant sound of the Bronco's engine wasn't enough to wake you up by itself, you were so tired, a combination of your pregnancy and all the rush you had been settling things, all you needed was just a couple of hours of extra sleep and you'd be all set. Your sweet cowboy knew that more than you did, so he just tiptoed his way into the kitchen in order not to disturb you. The cowboys sweet tooth was really making him lose focus, so he had to grab a slice of that delicious cake you'd made him; no matter how many times you'd told Jack he looked the same sexy cowboy as always, he was sure he was growing a soft belly, and that was certainly due to your great cooking and mostly baking skills. And yet, he couldn't care less about it. He would trade any abs and fit body in the world for the happiness of your shared domestic bliss. He was so absentmindedly eating his second slice of cake - it was just too good to stop in the first one, he didn't even notice you approaching him, only when you placed your delicate hand on his back he managed to turn around and give you a smile as best as possible, due to the amount of cake he was eating, so you just chuckled and shook your head
“Chew it slowly cowboy” you said sweetly and wiped some crumbles off his cheek and then went to his chest, doing the same with his shirt. His free immediately rested on your belly as he grinned.
"How's the little cowboy?”
"He's alright… I'd like to talk about the big cowboy, though” you told him and saw his puzzled face as you chuckled and wrapped your arms around his neck. Jack's body was so broad and strong, it simply made you always feel safe and quite turned on, although you couldn't get distracted by him. His arms wrapped around your body, heavy hands resting on the small of your back as he sighed, he hoped he wasn't in trouble, although he had quite a good guess what you wanted to talk about. He placed a peck on top of your head and looked into your eyes.
“What is it, sugar?”
"I want to know what's going on, cowboy… I know you're excited about our wedding, just as I am, but sometimes you just get so lost in thought, you wake up in the middle of night and underneath all that spark of happiness, I still see some melancholy underneath… I don't want to see you sad, Jack”
He closed his eyes when he felt your hand on his cheek, the slightest caress was already so comforting for that broken cowboy; he was a screw up but he had the best intentions, all he wanted was to make you happy without having to worry about losing the three of you. You, Wyatt and the baby being much more than he ever deserved, he just wished he didn't worry so much about everything all the time. Taking a seat on the chair and pulling you to his lap, he rested his face on your cleavage, sighing as he wondered if he should actually open up and tell you what was constantly on his mind. What if you somehow misinterpreted what he meant?! What if you got angry with him and his over protection? So many things ran through his mind as he remained in silence for a few seconds, until once more that healing caress of yours snapped him out of his newest wave of melancholy, this time tangled into his messy hair, you could see the tension dissolving from his shoulders and how he was ready to talk.
"I'm so happy with everything that's going on… our wedding, our baby, our cowboy Wyatt growing up stronger than a horse, I spent so long thinking I could never be happy in my life only to be the happiest man in the world. I'm so thankful to you for all of that, sugar. You made me a better man, you made me want to be better for you and our family and now we're welcoming a new baby into our lives, I can't help my excitement to do this with you, sugar, it's my dream coming true”
The cowboy said honestly, this time he was the one who held your face between his hands, caressing it gently and being so delicate towards you like he'd always been. Still, you knew him, being sure there was a little bit more to it than just the pure excitement.
"And…?”
Whiskey licked his lips and gave you a sad smile, seeing nothing would go past you unnoticed, not when it came to him at least. He felt pretty happy and safe because of that, his heart warm at how sweet you were.
“And my mind keeps taking me back to when I was young… All this wedding preparation going on reminds me of the first time I got married… how young and naive I was, how happy Gabriella got, and how hopeful we were when lil Jack was growing in her belly” he swallowed hard and lowered his eyes “please sugar, don't think I'm comparing you two or that I still love Gabriella in that way, but it makes me sad to think my boy could've become a man, a big strong cowboy, and his mama should be a hell of a successful woman by now. I know I discussed this hundreds if not thousands of times over the years, but their fate was just so unfair, and along with that, the fear of losing you and our beautiful little family the way I lost them starts creeping up in my chest and I just get so paranoid over everything an-”
You interrupted your cowboy with a kiss; touching his lips with yours, feeling the warmth of him irradiating onto you, the way his arms wrapped around you and he deepened the kiss, loving to have a taste of you, especially when his mouth couldn't make the right words, he knew his heart could, and above all, your heart could listen to it. And you understood it, you really did, it wasn't because Jack still thought of his late wife, not in that way, but he just couldn't help wondering what would've happened if things didn't go the tragic way they did. Your cowboy was a romantic and sensitive man, no matter what he tried saying or doing. You broke the kiss with a gentle smile and took his hand “come on, cowboy, let's go for a ride” you told him as you dragged him out of the kitchen, stopping midway just to let Helen know you and Jack would be gone for a while and she should keep an eye on Wyatt just in case.
The walk to the stables was quick, as your cowboy didn't hesitate in going after you, still slightly puzzled as to why you decided to go out like that, but the moment he saw your smile, he went soft: he would do anything for you. You finally let go of his hand and went to Silver Pony, greeting her and petting her head, warming up his heart. Jack loved how sweet and kind to the animals he kept at the ranch you were, knowing you loved that beautiful horse, just as much as Wyatt loved his beautiful little pony, he frowned softly as he saw you getting the saddle and putting it on your horse.
"I thought we'd agree you wouldn't ride horses for now, you know, to prevent stuff in case you fall or-” you interrupted your cowboy with another peck on the lips, knowing he wouldn't resist further than that. Smiling you shook your head slightly
"You know, it's funny you don't want me to ride a horse but you do want me to ride a cowboy every single night” you winked as you saw a slight red shade crossing his cheeks before he cleared his throat “come on, Jack, I'll be safe, I'll be with you, you're the best cowboy in the world, the best I've ever seen, we'll just take a short ride and that's it…”
And with your puppy eyes, you managed to convince him. Like you always did.
And you were right after all, the ride was short and calm, nothing different went on, as you two exited the ranch entrance and took the small side road towards the fruit trees, the cowboy just assumed you were going to pick up some to make a dessert or something similar, but the moment you crossed the fruit path and walked a bit further, stopping by the cemetery, was when he finally realized what you'd had in mind. He did not see that coming, a part of him still tried to deflect him from considering that, but when he saw you getting off Silver Pony and picking up some flowers, it was the confirmation he needed.
“S-sugar, why? Why are we here?”
He asked as you took his arm and made your way inside of that holy place.
"I think it's important, maybe this will ease your mind, Jack… I know how hard this subject still is for you, and I also know you haven't visited her in a while. I think it's important for you, and well, for me too, that way we can soothe these feelings that still haunt you, cowboy. Let's go, I do it with my heart open”
And with your encouraging words, your cowboy Jack Daniels took your hand and walked towards his late wife's grave, knowing it was always a bittersweet feeling, but above all, necessary. He hadn't been there in a while, it was almost as if he'd lost the habit of doing so, not feeling that need of visiting them, not after he started attending therapy and realized he had to let his first family go, not after he realized he needed to fight for the family he had with you and that was the most important thing. Still, around special dates such as their anniversary or worse, the anniversary of their passing, he felt he had to honor them by showing up and leaving a couple of flowers. Jack was also aware that you visited their grave once and it warmed his heart. You took some of your time to acknowledge their existence in a substantial way and not treat them as if they were just his weird obsession. Once he realized you both stood in front of the tombstone, he took a deep breath. No matter if years and decades went by, the sight of their names written there always pierced his heart. He knew his relationship with Gabriella could've taken so many turns if she hadn't died: they could've been together until this day or they could've split up, they could still have feelings for each other or hate each other's guts, so many possibilities, none of them would ever come true, but what shattered his heart for real, was to think of his little boy, think of his little Jack, still so small and fragile inside his mommy's tummy, unlike Gabriella, Jack never got to hold him, never got to look into his eyes or caress his hair. Technically, it should've been easier for him to get over the loss of someone he had never met, but it wasn't, if anything, it was even worse, because he could never stop himself from wondering what would've happened. Would his son be good at school or get bad grades? Would be a mama's boy like Whiskey himself was as a kid or would he be rebellious? If he'd followed his dad's step and found his sweetheart earlier in life, there was a fat chance Whiskey would be a grandpa by then.
But those ifs and might-have-beens were just spiculation. There was no way to know it, and not to descend into madness once more living off daydreams and made up scenarios, was that he seeked help. He was better now, better than he'd ever been, but at emotional times like those, it was quite difficult not to be caught in the moment, so he felt startled when you placed your hand on his shoulder.
"Do you want me to go and give you some time?” You suggested as you placed the flowers on Gabriella's and the baby's graves, you had a gut feeling that moment was important for your cowboy, but now that you were actually there, you felt slightly dislocated, not knowing exactly what to do or what to say, it felt so intimate to be there, to see Jack's eyes fill up with tears, but instead of asking you for a moment, he tightened his grip around your hand and kept you in place. The two of you closed your eyes and said a silent prayer to his first family. You thanked Gabriella for taking care of your Jack and promised her you would make him happy, not letting him fall into his old depressive habits again; you also wished her and her baby's soul peace and happiness in heaven. Jack, on the other hand, prayed for them and for his new family, he told them he would always keep them both in his heart but it was time to let them rest, they'd never be forgotten or unloved, but the cowboy had another family to love and protect, he asked them for their blessing and he burst out crying when he spotted a blue butterfly on Gabriella's grave. She used to love butterflies and blue was her favorite color. It could've been a sign or not, he wasn't really sure, but the fact was that a weight seemed to be lifted off his chest at the same time he pulled you for a hug and thanked you for going there with him.
Truth was: if roles were reversed and Jack had died that night instead of Gabriella, he would've wanted her to move on and find peace and love with someone who could truly make her happy, so he finally realized and convinced himself there was no reason for him to do that, his late wife would've wanted the same.
•••
As Ginger got off the phone and paced the room, you felt your throat tightening with anxiety and worry; your chest was so heavy and the tears threatened to splurge from your eyes at any moment, there was still no sign of your cowboy and the way Ginger seemed tense as she whispered information with whoever was at the agency, only brought you even more fear of having lost your husband. You eyed the kids, who behaved perfectly and it pained you not being able to appreciate that, you wish you could sit down with them, talk and play, smile and hold them, but at that moment you were so unavailable, all you needed was to have some news from your cowboy, that was all you wished for; you wish you could hold him tight, you wish you could feel his presence, his warm, his scent all over you again. You craved your cowboy, your husband, and you couldn't even begin to consider the possibility of not having him anymore, at the same time those depressive thoughts were the only ones that crossed your mind. Wyatt complained about being hungry and as much as you should have gotten up and started making him dinner, you simply couldn't move yourself from your seat. Everything hurt and the way Ginger hung up and simply shook her head, signaling there were still no words about your cowboy, just shattered your heart. You discreetly dried a single tear and nodded at her, as you buried your hand into your son's curly hair - exactly like his dad's when he went a few extra weeks without a pretty decent trim. Even at your gentle caress, Wyatt still whined about being hungry, but seeing you were under no conditions of making them dinner, Ginger offered herself to make him some mac&cheese while Helen immediately stepped up to prepare Rosie's bottle. You thanked them and enjoyed a moment of silence as you were left in the living room by yourself. You shook your head thinking of things you couldn't actually change, but if you had that power you would've insisted him to stay, not to take that last mission, the future for the two of you along with the kids was just so bright, you had so many possibilities, he didn't need the money, he should've just stayed home with you. It should be a quiet evening, having a family dinner together, feeding and bathing the kids and then snuggling in bed, feeling those quick strong hands of his, roaming all over your body while those devilish lips whispered the most sinful things in your ear.
If only.
You sighed and got up, walking around the living room, stretching your legs and trying to control that huge sadness that seemed to have taken over you like a dark thick shadow that wouldn't go away. As you went to the window and watched it how the overcast sky had turned into a dark night, cold night, you saw the trees moving softly with the wind, which blew coldly through the leaves, you thought of how thoughtful Jack had become those early days before the wedding, how he would just stare outside and allow his mind to drift away, you knew now he had thought of his late wife and how things could've been different for her, you didn't want to think of that, because your troubled mind would wonder if you had really lost your husband already, if your worst nightmare had become true, if he would be reunited with Gabriella at that moment. So many ifs, as much as you fought that thought it didn't seem so distant which made you gasp and finally broke into tears. It was torture. Your heart was broken.
When you looked out the window once more, your eyes were still blurred with tears, as you tried controlling yourself, knowing it wasn't the time for your kids to see your outburst, so at first, you didn't actually see that curious figure moving in the darkness, it wouldn't even make sense to you, no one could be possibly wandering around, the glimpse of a mysterious figured might've been confused with a hallucination, but not the sound of a horse's hooves approaching the house. That was very real, you realized, the moment you raised your head and frowned trying to see exactly who it was. It wasn't possible, was it? The thing you'd been praying for the most for the past couple of days, had you fallen asleep? Were you dreaming? You wouldn't be able to tell, not with that anxiety bombing you completely making you feel as if your heart was about to beat right out of your chest. Not holding back anymore, you simply ran to the front door, opening it and rushing towards the knight in shining armor coming back home to you.
"Jack!!!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, your face filled with pure emotion as your depressing, pained tears were quickly replaced by happy ones, the relief you felt was enough to spread through your body and make it weak, having the sensation you could reach the ground at any moment, but there was no problem, your cowboy was finally back home.
Noticing you, your despair and your eagerness to see him, Jack immediately got off the couch and finished the path towards you by running. Welcoming you into his eyes, you jumped on him, crying and gripping his body against yours as if your life depended on it. You cried as you felt his hands running up and down your back, the way he whispered sweet little soothing words, reminding you he was finally safely home. You couldn't believe it, one moment you felt terrified you'd have to move onto a sad, depressing life without your cowboy, and then next, he was right there, for you. You also knew he was tired, hungrily, bruised and in need of a shower and certainly a lot of Ginger’s painkillers, but you allowed yourself to be a little bit more selfish and keep him to yourself, holding your husband and taking every bit of him.
"It's okay sugar, I'm home… it was the last one, I promise you, from now on, I'm retired Agents Whiskey, no more leaving my family behind to risk my life for others” he promised you with his whole heart, not being able to take your sadness at the realization of how much you'd suffered with him gone. He couldn't do that to you nor your family, he had priorities in life, and they would always be you, Wyatt and Rosie.
The way Jack kept you in his embrace, face buried into your neck, your sweet scent reminding him of home and showing him that just like you, he wasn't dreaming, he was indeed back home from a mission he didn't die for a true miracle, his heart calmed down. You could've stayed in that embrace forever, it was all your heart begged and ached for, nothing more or nothing less, and the only thing that was able to break that hug was when Wyatt's voice shouted a happy “daddy!!!” at the top of his little lungs, followed by Rosie's cooes and loud baby noises, the cowboy's eyes filled with tears at that scene. It wasn't just his sugar, it was also his kids claiming for him, his family who waited hopefully and patiently for him to come home to. He opened his arms to them, Wyatt running as fast as his favorite horse and Rosie being brought in by Helen, but it didn't take very long until she was in her daddy's arms, cooing and gripping his cheeks like she always did while he kissed her sweet face. There was no reason to cry or be sad about stuff, the Daniels were reunited again.
•••
The next couple of hours went by in a blur, you felt anesthetized at everything that went on, and while Jack had to sit down with Ginger - and Champ who arrived about an hour later and got them all locked into your cowboy's office, Helen insisted you to take a bath, followed by a calming herb tea, while she kept an eye on the kids for you.
You never really knew what went on during the mission, it was top secret after all, the only thing you were informed about was that the mission was dangerous, but a success, and Jack Daniels, now retired and former Agent Whiskey had been a hero. As a thank you for all the years of service, Champ gifted your husband with a significant part of the Statesman's shares, which would assure you and your family a comfortable future to put it mildly. Not only that, but he also offered your cowboy his CEO job, not the whole chain, but from the local factory, which meant he didn't have to drive more than just a few miles until the distillery, sit down at his desk, get his demands done and come back at the end of the day to see his beautiful family. It certainly brought you a big relief, your cowboy would be safe and sound and your kids would grow up with their dad around.
Once everyone finally went home, Jack had clarified all the professional details, he was able to shower, eat and have you take care of his wounds, stitching him up and patching him up, he was finally good to go. Of course, he had a 5 o'clock growing due to the days he was unable to shave, but he would have enough time for that. The important thing was that the four of you lay on the couch of your living room, relaxing and letting the calmness sink in. Your cowboy sighed relieved as he rubbed your arm up and down, at the same time the kids yawned but fought so hard their sleep. Wyatt was rubbing his little eyes, and yet, he didn't want to go to sleep at all, his tiny little hands caressed Rosie's thin and soft hair, the one that smelled like strawberry baby shampoo and he loved it. He giggled at her, who returned her big brother's affection by giving him a sweet gummy smile.
"Mommy, daddy, can I continue telling Rosie about the wedding?” Wyatt asked between yawns as Jack chuckled and nodded, his fingers toying with his son's soft curls, the feeling of his feeling surrounding him was better than anything he'd ever experienced before.
"Go ahead little cowboy, just don't forget telling your pretty little sister how beautiful mama was”
At his daddy's incentives, Wyatt let out one last long yawn and looked at his sister.
“So, Rosie… about mommy's and daddy's wedding. Mommy was so pretty!”
•••
The unusual warmth for December allowed you to have the wedding of your dreams: right by the willow trees, just as you had fantasized about since you were just Whiskey's girlfriend a few years back. Time flew by just as a lot of things between the two of you, things that had finally been settled and worked on, and your happy ending was near. You stared at yourself in the mirror, in awe at the fact the wedding dress suited you way better than you thought it would. It was a relief, as your pregnancy progressed, one of your bride's fears was not fitting into your special dress on your even more special day. Luckily, that wasn't the case. Everyone who helped you get ready, had been nothing but kind and honest, when they all told you you looked beautiful, but none of these compliments were nearly as heart warming as your son's, whose little eyes got brighter the moment he spotted you. He had insisted on getting dressed along with his dad, since he was convinced cowboys should help each other, but once he was ready in his adorable cowboy attire, he insisted on helping his mama this time, after all, you two had been best friends for a long time, so it was fair he would be by your side. Not only that, since he'd been officially invited to walk you down the aisle, Wyatt had noticed how important his task was, and he didn't want to do his mommy dirty, he wanted things to be perfect, so once he rushed to you, you simply got on your knees to hug your little man. In a way, if it weren't for him, none of that would be happening.
"You're beautiful, mommy!”
There was something Wyatt wasn't tired of saying, perhaps it was all the kindness you had in your heart you used to raise him well, or maybe he was just taking after his dad in being a charming cowboy, it was still too early to figure it out, but what really mattered for you, was how proud you were of the little human being he was becoming. Those were motivational things that assured you things were on the right track, when it came to raising and loving your family. As you twirled and your son clapped in excitement, he giggled and wrapped his little arms around your legs once more, not containing his urge of hugging his mommy once more. It never crossed his witty mind that it could wrinkle your beautiful dress in any way, but if you were being honest, neither did it go through your own mind. You'd never refuse any of your beloved ones’ caresses out of fear of wrinkling a piece of clothes. Things were perfect the way they were, you couldn't want anything more for the three - well, now four, of you.
"Mommy! Daddy’s so nervous! He can't wait” Wyatt whispered between his giggles, not sure if that was gossiping or not, but he didn't see any harm in telling his mommy about important things like that, and those were important to him. You chuckled and held him again, placing a peck on top of his head and nodding.
“Well, I'm nervous too… it's a dream daddy and I have, you know? It's coming true… it's like having so many butterflies in your tummy, kinda like when it's your birthday and you can't wait, that's all you can think of and you feel as if your tummy is funny but in a good way?!” You explained to him the best way you could, a way you knew your son was going to understand and you couldn't be happier about the face Wyatt was so damn smart. Good thing both your and the Daniels genes were a good mixture, because he took you by the hand with his smaller one and nodded.
“It's time mommy!”
The walk from the house to the willow trees didn't seem to be that long before your wedding day, you could've sworn things were a lot easier than they seemed at that moment, but each time you looked at your son's pure determination in taking you to his daddy, your heart calmed down. You figured your husband was as nervous as you were, but not only that, he was probably as happy as you were too, and in addition to it, he must've been so handsome. You just didn't expect him to be that handsome. So handsome that the moment you reached the willow tree path, everything seemed blurry and not so important. The decorations you knew were beautiful, the fairy lights on the trees, the roses all scattered around, the guests, all of your friends, fellow agents and important people who took part in your lives, all of that simply came second the moment you spotted your cowboy. Jack was so handsome, the gorgeous, flawless suit he'd been gifted by Eggsy and the Kingsman simply fit him like a velvet glove, perhaps it was that, or the way he took off his cowboy hat in respect at your entrance, knowing you should be the spotlight, after all, you were the bride, just not any bride, you were his bride and that was enough to make that old mushy heart beat nearly out of his chest. It was like nothing existed at that moment except you and him, and once the song played and your son took you by the hand, accomplishing the very expected task given to him, you could barely believe that was real, but it was, and you were marrying your cowboy.
As you stood in front of your fiance, you swore you never felt such a stronger wave of love for him. You both had gone over so many things, but in the end, love overcame it all and there was no other way things would be like, you and him would finally be together, married, before the men and before God, forever and ever.
"You look gorgeous, sugar” he whispered and took your hand, kissing it gently, before he turned to the priest and you did the same. The ceremony was short and full of beautiful words, exactly like you and Jack wanted. No boring services where you both and the guests would fall asleep halfway towards it. Your cowboy always defended the idea of small ceremonies and large parties, and you couldn't agree more. When you were both pronounced husband and wife, he kissed you, and you returned the kiss, the way he held you in his arms showing you it was real and meant to be, oh that cowboy meant business. But he didn't just stop there, once he broke the kiss, he got on his knees in front of you, like the gentleman he was and pecked your stomach very gently. An obvious and yet extremely delicate way of breaking the news to the world there was a new member of the Daniels family on their way.
•••
As you carried an asleep Rosie into your eyes while Jack did the same with Wyatt - your husband was a gentleman, he carried the heavier one so your back wouldn't hurt - he couldn't help but chuckle.
"He fell asleep before telling her about our wedding party, that was a good one”
"And he couldn't even get to her birth either, but don't worry Jack, I'm sure we'll all be gifted with his version of the facts, all they gotta do is recharge their batteries for a little while and they'll be good to go, way better than us, by the way, because I'm exhausted”
"Me too, sugar”
Your cowboy planted a sweet peck on your lips, watching as you placed Rosie carefully in her crib and covered her up, tucking your gorgeous daughter in and allowing her to fly into her sweet dreams. Then, it was your son's turn, you followed Jack into Wyatt's little cowboy room and watched him do the same, tucking your son gently and wishing him sweet dreams with the loveliest whisper and closing the door behind him. And then it was just the two of you, finally the two of you.
As Jack took you to your shared bedroom, you could already see a hint of sadness in his eyes. He was sure you were about to enquire about what happened on that mission, but the only thing you did was approach your cowboy carefully and slowly and kiss him. Feeling his heavy hands resting on your hips as they brought you closer to him at the same time you wrapped your arms around his broad width. Things didn't have to rush, not now, not at the moment where you were so deep into his caresses. As he broke the kiss, you stroked his cheek.
"I know, Jack. I know you aren't supposed to talk about what happened on that mission, I'm aware it's top secret, but I also know you nearly died, so I just want to tell you I'm thrilled to know you aren't doing it again, I'm so happy you've finally retired, that way I don't have to worry about not having you coming back home to me, and well, us, your kids, your family. I just love you with all my heart, and I don't think I'd bear becoming a widow…”
Your lips were immediately connected with his, as he felt the urge of kissing you once more, the way your words stung - because he knew you were correct, he knew missions were getting more and more dangerous, either that or perhaps Jack was becoming too old for that. But he also knew he had no right to screw things up, not when you two had built a gorgeous family, he didn't have the right to take that away from you by letting you become a widow, and god forbid Jack die before enjoying his marriage and kids. It wouldn't be fair, not after everything you two fought so hard for - still, your words melted his heart all at once, he loved you endlessly, more than anything in the world, and he wished he knew how to word that out for you, so a gentle kiss was the best he could come up at that moment.
“You won't lose me, sugar. I promise you that much, you got all of me, I am retired and I'll be around so much you gonna get tired of my face all the time”
“I doubt that, cowboy… I love you”
"I love you too, my beautiful sugar. You're the woman of my dreams, my beautiful wife” Jack kissed your hands as he wrapped his arms around you, placing you down the bed and straddling you. He was having his way with you that night, something the two of you anticipated so much. There was nothing you wanted more than to sink into your cowboy's arms. Forever.
•••
What Wyatt failed to tell his little sister before the two of them fell asleep exhaustedly wasn't the biggest part of the story, but you were sure he would've told her how good the yummy food was - and that he was the one who helped you pick it all up, and in case you and their daddy decided to get married again, for the party purpose of course, and nothing remotely similar to a breakup, Wyatt was sure you'd call Rosie for her help too. He would also tell her about how pretty it was to see the two of you waltzing, exactly like a princess and a prince, and how you and his daddy danced with Wyatt on the dance floor until he was too tired to remember what happened next. For the following months, there was nothing more than just pure bright happiness in that ranch. Wyatt started school, he was still in kindergarten, and as much as you and Jack were proud of your little boy, you could've sworn you saw a single tear run down your tough cowboy's cheek. He was thinking of how many important things he'd missed from his son's life, but that wasn't going to happen again. He was a present dad, the kind of person to attend any type of teacher-parent conference and be there all the time for his kids. He loved them with all his heart, and with the months progressing along with your pregnancy, Jack had stayed by your side at any given opportunity. He loved you, and he loved his baby girl, and every single night he dreamed of her; he dreamed of her sweet face, a face that resembled yours, as well as Wyatt's, and even resembled his own. He wondered what her hair and eye color would be like, and as he saw your pregnant belly swollen with his baby, the love seed he planted there, it also made his own heart swollen with pride.
When you woke up cramping and soon enough your water broke, he felt he had won the damn Superbowl, driving you to the hospital in his Bronco at the speed of light and later on having Helen pick up Wyatt from school and take him to the hospital. By the time your lovely little cowboy was officially a big brother to your newest bundle of joy: Rose Marie Daniels.
Although Wyatt insisted on calling her Rosie because he thought it was cuter and the nickname sort of caught on. If you usually went by ‘sugar’, your husband and son went by ‘cowboy’, why couldn't your beautiful daughter go by ‘Rosie’ after all?
And so went on your life as a married woman to the man of your dreams and your two beautiful children. There was nothing you could ask for, you had it all, and you loved every single part of it.
•••
A whole year had passed: your cowboy had finally gotten used to his retirement, out go super secret dangerous missions, and in come mornings spent at the distillery, supervising the production of the finest Statesman's liquor, afternoons spent taking care of the ranch and carrying Rosie all over, as the two of them waited eagerly for Wyatt to come home from school. You had talked to your husband about daycare, he knew it was quite a good idea, his baby daughter was smart and fast as a thunder, but the mere idea of sending her off to spend the whole day away from him was enough to tear his heart apart: he couldn't go without watching silly little cartoons, or making cute piggy tails on her soft hair and allow her to take a daily nap on top of his chest and belly. She was almost turning two, and as much as it mesmerized him to see her blossoming and growing up so fast, it still saddened him to see how fast time flew by. He was getting a third kid fever, but he wasn't sure if it was happening; maybe it was, he still needed to talk to you about it, but those were later plans, he still had so much to do with his life, with his family, he wanted to enjoy Wyatt, who was now nearly turning 8. His beautiful Rosie was practically a toddler now, and there was nothing more he enjoyed in the world than picking up Wyatt from school and letting the kids run loose with you in the green fields while he grilled his famous burgers. Those were special days, because they had nothing elaborated in them, just a family moment among the Daniels, something the brokenhearted cowboy thought he would never get, but turns out he did. He deserved it all. After trying so hard to convince himself he didn't, after trying to convince himself he was just a heartless man, he was shown he wasn't a horrible human being as the two of you had thought several times. You two had come along a long way, but in the end, things had worked out, because your love was big and strong, and nothing in the world could come between you.
As you watched Wyatt and Rosie playing with Silver Star, you walked to Jack, wrapping your arms around his body and kissing him deeply. His face was smooth as always and his mustache always trimmed, just as you loved kissing and riding quite often. You smirked at him and snuggled him.
“So, have you made up your mind, honey?”
"About what, sugar?”
“You know, running for mayor in this upcoming election..”
You and Jack had discussed it, more likely drunkenly discussing the possibility, you didn't know if he had actually meant that, but you knew your husband well enough to see that fire in his eyes and the genuine will to help the ones in need and give it back to the city that took him in. He returned the smile and kissed your neck, warning a groan from you.
"I still don't know, I think of it sometimes, it would be nice, I know I'd have support from you, the kids and quite a lot of people in town, but I worry it would make our lives too exposed you know, and I don't want that, I love our life the way it is, how happy and calm those kids are, I don't know about mixing up things…”
“Well, I want you to remember I love you and I'll support you no matter what. I gotta admit it makes me feel a little nervous to have this possibility of getting into politics and having our lives changing completely, although I'm sure I'd love to call you Mr.Mayor”
And at that naughty line, you earned a smack on your butt, making you squirm softly and see your cowboy really enjoyed the nickname, even if he didn't try running for mayor. Still, there was something else you knew he wanted, it could be a future plan too, but it wouldn't hurt to talk about it.
"You know, I was thinking that maybe in the near future, we could have a third baby… what about adopting this time?”
And your cowboy's heart nearly exploded with happiness and excitement. There was nothing he wanted more than seeing his family grow. No matter if it was by blood or simply by love, for a man who bought a ranch to fill it in with broken promises and lost dreams, nothing made him happier than to see his family running all over that place with so much joy and excitement. The happy giggles and squeals, and to think that could even grow, it was just an endless bliss, the kind of bliss Jack Daniels, former Agent Whiskey had to pinch himself and make sure he wasn't asleep, but instead, it was his lovely, beautiful reality.
"Daddy!!! We're hungry!”
Wyatt chimed in as he ran to him, followed by Rosie, who clung to her dad as if her little life depended on it.
"Yes, daddy, we’we hungwy!” She imitated her big brother, still not able to pronounce the R’s properly and making her daddy's heart melt into a puddle of love and affection. He got on his knees, wrapping his arms around his children. He loved them with all his heart. Just as much as he loved you, deeply, more than anything he had ever loved anyone.
Jack Daniels, former Agent Whiskey, a man whose heart was once broken, was now a man full of love. He was devoted to his wife and his beautiful kids, nothing in the world mattered more than them and for someone who had been known as a heartless man, he was nothing but love and comfort for you, Wyatt and Rosie.
The four of you were perfect for each other and maybe in the near future, there would be another addition to the Daniels, but until then, that cowboy was going to devote himself completely to you.
He wasn't ever called a heartless man again, not with that amount of love he felt overflowing through himself. He loved and he received love, just like he was supposed to, just like he deserved it.
____
A/N: thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you all for the kindness and the support you all showed me with this story. It's been nearly a year of what should've been just a one shot and turned into a 20 chapter piece of work! I'm so happy and proud of myself for being able to write this beautiful story, nothing cheers up my heart more than knowing you all showed me so much love! Please besties, it's been a long ride, so if you can, leave me a feedback for our cowboy's last ride, I hope you've enjoyed it, as much as I did! Love you all and once more, thank you for the support ❤️💫
#pedro pascal#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x y/n#pedro pascal fanfic#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal series#agent whiskey#agent whiskey x reader#agent whiskey x you#agent whiskey x y/n#agent whiskey fanfiction#agent whiskey fanfic#agent whiskey series#jack daniels x reader#jack daniels#jack daniels x you#jack daniels x y/n#jack daniels fanfiction#jack daniels fanfic#jack daniels series#agent whiskey kingsman#kingsman
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So I read The brooch from the possible future au (this is why it was on my mind when you made that post about Cyrus) and I loved it😭 It hurt, but it was also heartfelt and beautiful and I got really emotional from it so sorry in advance if this rant sounds a little silly.
It was somehow so comforting despite being so tragic.
First of all at the beginning they're just sitting there, being content❤️ (you know I love characters just sitting around (or if you didn't, now you do!)
"Sometimes Aiden still couldn’t believe that this was real. That this was his. He never wanted Talon to stop looking at him like that. "
This says exactly what needs to be said!
Also, I love how much Talon's smiling in this (in the beggining of it)
"Too valuable for someone like me, he thought, but didn’t say it, because he knew Talon didn’t like it when he talked like this."
I don't like it when you talk like this! But it's so cute because it implies that Talon and Aiden did have talks about this!
"Wherever you are, my heart is with you"❤️😭
Now, you probably expect me to scream at you for the second part, but I won't because like I said it is somehow still heartwarming for me.
See, now I want to start quoting again, but then I'd put nearly the whole thing here, so I'll say this:
Every word describes the whole situation so perfectly. It feels like there's not a word out of place, like they are all emphasizing a point that I think isn't really the tragedy, but the love they have for each other.
I also love how much affection Talon is initiating here, trying to comfort both of them.
The fact that Aiden tries to give back the brooch. The fact that Talon doesn't let him, and that THIS comforts Aiden somewhat.
But I do have to quote my favorite part!
"A small sob escaped him as Aiden held out a small object to him, hands trembling. “I think… I think you might want it back. Give it to… give it to her.”
And the last part... it was so hard seeing Aiden like that so I won't go into much detail here. He reminded me of Milan a little.
And if you'll indulge me I would like to go on a little rant about my story and angst:
I don't know if I emphasize this enough but I NEED you to know this:
All the (canon) Ákos angst comes with the inevitable end of Ákos ending up all right. With someone comforting him, helping him, or him realizing that it's okay. Otherwise, I wouldn't do it to him.
You see, the thing is that Ákos is an incredibly strong person. More importantly he has people around him to support him (his parents and siblings).
The reason I talk so much about post story Ákos angst is because aside from those small things that fade with time Ákos goes back to being normal and happy!
He goes back to following Endre around everywhere.
He goes back to exploring the castle a houndred times with Moss.
He goes back to reading in Adél's room.
And when he's not able to do something that he used to be able to do, when he's scared, there's always someone to help him through it.
There's this moment in this holiday special thing (THAT I SWEAR I'LL BE SO SAD IF I CAN'T WRITE THIS YEAR) where they're walking in the winter woods and he wants to run off and look around, but he's a little scared, and Adél notices and follows two steps behind him so he doesn't have to worry. And then, after a while, he doesn't enen need Adél to do this.
Whenever he's having a problem, there's always at least one of his siblings to swoop in and help.
And like I said he's not always having problems!
Also this goes without saying but he will realize that it wasn't his fault.
Most importantly Ákos didn't lose his curiosity which in my opinion would have been the most tragic thing that could have happened (it happens in the villain Adél au). Sure he becomes a little more cautious (especially at first) but no less confident.
I might have mentioned this already but Ákos has always been interested in the Black swamp. And he didn't let what happened to him ruin this.
When he grows up, he will (probably, the specifics of this may change) research history with a special emphasis on the Black swamp, and he'll love it.
Ákos took this horrible experience that he had and made something positive out of it. Something that interests him, something that makes him happy (that down the line even ends up helping others).
Ákos' strength comes from two places:
One is that that's just what he's like
But more importantly because he was influenced by each of his siblings. He has a little bit of each of them in him, plus his own stuff!❤️
I hope you didn't mind this little rant🙈 I was just hoping that knowing this about Ákos gives you at least some fuzziness even if it is bittersweet like the ones I got from reading your short story.
I finally got around to answer this! Thanks so much for your patience 😌
I’m feeling really flattered that you liked The Brooch so much you wrote this ask!
Though I know the possible future au is a very painful one for us Taiden stans, it is really dear to me. And I loved writing this short story for it in particular! Both part one and two!
Part one really is mostly hurt, but it has lots of comfort in it too. I wanted to make the meaning of the brooch for both of them clear. I think I managed that quite well and to be honest, I did tear up a bit while writing the breakup part and the one where Aiden told Ash…
Also you’re not wrong, Aiden in the last bit is a bit like Milan, which is sad if you consider that it’s pretty much what Aiden always feared.
You’re always welcome to rant a little about your story to me!
You really don’t need to justify your Ákos angst to me. I know I complain about it (in a very fond way btw, never in the negative sense), but this is your story and you can do whatever you want! And don’t worry, I’m very aware that Ákos will be alright in the end. And I’m really glad about it ^^
And it’s great his siblings will help him through it all. That’s one of the best things about stories like yours!
(I’m very glad my boy Ákos will be alright in the end btw!)
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Can you do a yandere!wheatley oneshot where the reader escapes but gets caught by him?
Attachment
Summary: His unpredictable fixation towards you is perhaps all that's left keeping this facility intact. Though "intact" might be a bit of a overstatement.
Warnings: yandere character; imprisonment; vague description of death;
Wheatley likes you.
Though, that's a sentiment he's not sure he should be feeling. Or, technically speaking, if he can even "feel" it. The ones responsible for his existence might have programmed a personality and a certain ability to recognize and simulate what a human can feel, but that doesn't make it any less of a fabrication. Still, he guesses it's real enough for him. If a turret can scream in pain when it meets its sudden demise, why wouldn't he be able to call you his friend?
How else would he describe it? At first you were just a human, a surviving test subject, a way out of this place. The only way out of this place. He needed you for practical reasons, but you... You needed him more as a sort of an anchor.
He endeared himself to you faster than he thought he would. Humans require some sort of connection, he's aware, and you have been locked inside this abandoned facility with barely any notable traces of humanity left. It's tragic, really. Who else would you be leaning on, if not the only sentient thing who didn’t seem to want you dead in this place?
That’s when he realised it. He realised that you needed him. And found himself feeling quite proud of that! Would you believe it? Someone actually found him useful! Who needed his guidance, who wanted his company and who actually cared. Someone cared about him.
But he's above all that now, right? Right.
He's certain of it, probably just as much as he was certain he convinced you (and himself) that he doesn't need you. He got everything he could ever want now! Long gone are the days of pathetic little Wheatley, who took orders from higher-ups and was dependent on their mercy to even just move around the facility. Now he's the higher power, now he's the one in control!
So why would he care?
He doesn't! He doesn't. He doesn't care, he doesn't need you. You're just a human, an insignificant test subject. Who cares! He's just keeping you for... Practical, scientific purposes, of course. There's tests to run, and he requires test subjects to run them, after all. That's all there is to it.
But his reaction to your abrupt disappearance spoke of a different story.
During a moment he neglected to pay attention, in a rare instance that his gaze failed to be trailed onto you, you managed to get away. Though you finally decided to take advantage of a distraction, to slip through the faults of his supervision, you weren’t expecting your escape attempt to go that smoothly.
Finding a fault in his "security" wasn't the hard part. Not really. Wheatley's intelligence has... Very noticeable limits. The hard part was not meeting your sudden and very painful death shortly after. The structural integrity of this place is about as stable as Wheatley himself, and it's honestly quite impressive how either are still standing.
It actually didn't take him long to locate you, but he nearly destroyed whatever parts of the Enrichment Center are still functional, and he also nearly took you to your death while he was at it.
Wheatley's anger is something that you, on most days, try to avoid. Despite still having the very fresh memory of him as your small, harmless and slightly idiotic spherical friend; you would be lying through your teeth if you said he doesn’t scare you in his current position. He's still an idiot, sure, but that doesn't make him any less of a terrifying idiot.
"Sooo... Are you done with your little temper tantrum?" His voice has become somewhat of a background noise as your time trapped in here passes.
You’d think at this point you would rather tear your ears out than hear him talk for even just a second longer; and at some point in the beginning of all of this you did find that idea enticing, but nowadays you can barely find it in yourself to care. Besides, at least it’s a sign you’re still alive, you suppose. The rare few times he does leave you completely rotting alone in a test chamber for long stretches of time make you question that fact.
As usual, you don’t give him an answer.
"Oh, c'mon, we both know that you can't keep this going forever." You wonder how he hasn’t gotten tired of this yet. Or if he ever will. He does like to keep mentioning how easily he could get rid of you, but he never follows through with his words.
"Ok, maybe you can. I wouldn't put that stupid stubbornness beyond you, actually..." He’s technically not even in the test chamber with you, but you can feel his gaze searing into you through that large screen, even despite the cracked glass (courtesy of a particularly angry moment from you). "But my point still stands, mate. You're gonna grow desperate. And guess who's the only one left you can turn to?"
You know he likes you.
Maybe that’s the worst part. There’s no one else waiting for you outside these walls. And from what you vaguely remember of what GLaDOS told you before, is there even anyone still alive at all outside these walls? Had she told you the truth or have you just now grown exhausted and complacent enough to finally believe her?
"Me. It's me- Just in case you couldn't guess. Wouldn't surprise me, humans tend to be a bit slow, afterall-" Your lack of response never really seemed to discourage him. If nothing else, he tends to get a bit lost in his monologues when you offer no input of your own.
"I'm sorry." Your voice came out a bit hoarse, you barely remember when was the last time you actually spoke out loud instead of just screaming or giving him the silent treatment.
"Of course you are-" He was so caught up in his speech that it took him a second to process what you said. "Uh, Wait- You are? And-" You watch his eye squint in disbelief. “You’re talking to me?” But he pretends to recover quickly.
"I mean, of course! Oh, of course you’re sorry, why wouldn’t you be?” You would have rolled your eyes at the immediate switch up, had you any energy left. “And, as you know, normally I wouldn’t humour you, but well…“ He trails off.
“Considering we’re having a civilised conversation for once, I might just let it slide!” He was doing a terrible job of pretending to be indifferent to the situation at hand, it’s been a while since you heard him sound this chipper. “I can be gracious, after all. But, well, you’re gonna need to say it again.” You can tell he had gotten really close to the camera, with how the screen only had visibility of his bright blue light “iris”.
“No reason! No particular reason, it’s just-” You didn’t let him continue.
“I’m sorry, Wheatley.” If you had to take a guess, he just missed hearing your voice.
There was a silence that lasted for a precious short while, a rare moment where he simply stared at you without saying anything. Observing. Absorbing.
“Good to know you can still do that. Talk, I mean. Had started to think you lost your ability to speak. That can happen sometimes, you know?” For a moment, you could swear he sounded just like you remember him. Trying his best to sound helpful and knowledgeable. Well, you suppose he never lost that habit, just with way more of an ego now.
“You know what? I just had the best idea.”
“Truly an ingenious plan. From now on, you’re going to stay with me. Right here, in my lair.” He put an unnecessary amount of dramatic flair on the last word. “I know, I know, what an honour.” You didn’t particularly want to be in the central AI chamber again, nor did you want to be physically near him, but… Maybe this could work out in your favor.
“That was the problem, right? Humans need company, of course. Failiable creatures with their impractical needs.” He sounded a bit too unpreoccupied for someone who was currently messing with the structure of this place, opening up a path for you to follow along. You wished this place would just collapse already. But you have a feeling he wouldn’t let you go even if it did.
“And that way you won’t need to be going anywhere ever again.”
#tw yandere#yandere x reader#yandere x you#yandere imagines#yandere oneshot#yandere wheatley#yandere wheatley x reader#yandere portal#yandere portal x reader#tw imprisonment#tw death
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Just a couple of reasons why Izzy is NOT
RICKY doing that?? Pshaw, they didn't even meet until this episode! From the narrative POV, this doesn't make any sense. Izzy supposedly taking his own life off-screen was more likely.
not enough stakes. That WE'RE GOING IN, BOIS scene almost didn't have any at all, not even to the level "someone gets hurt", definitely not to the level of "someone gets killed off". That scene was "Successful heist" vibe, not a "We're gonna look Death in the face" vibe. Izzy getting shot was like a random thing - which COULD have been poignant in a different show (about how life is tragic and unpredictable, yadda yadda), but it's really out of place here.
Izzy touched Stede's leg in the bar. This wouldn't have happened if the continuation of their relationship was not planned (and I mean plot threads getting forgotten about is a thing, but it doesnt seem to be a thing in this particular show). Teaching Stede is one thing, that can be interpreted as part of the "Izzy accepts the crew as a family" narrative, but keeping your hand on someone's knee? Not really familial and also would have been random if that was the intention.
We were shown this very same type of wound basically being easily survived by both Stede and Ed. Stede also moved a lot after getting stabbed (more blood loss, same as Izzy). Still both survived. Ed treated getting skewerd like a scratch and was not shown to be even slightly affected by it. If now this wound would suddenly be fatal that would be illogical in the context of the show.
Izzy didn't die from rotting leg infection, didn't die from the blood loss when getting a leg amputated (major surgery done by complete noobs), didn't die from pain shock, didn't die from a bullet to the head (thanks to luck but still), didn't die from a severe head trauma (I assume a bullet ricocheting off of your nogging hard enough to leave a scar would give you one. Ed definitely agrees), didn't die from subsequent alcohol poisoning while his health was very much impaired. "Indestructible little fucker" indeed, so why would he die here.
on the topic of "indestructible little fucker". The show spells out a lot of things to us with words. Sometimes also repeating them kinda incessantly (count how many times a variation on the "turn toxicity into positivity" was mentioned). So pronouncing Izzy as such is basically a spell (during a storm and lightning to boot! STYLE), it's the point of him now.
Ed and Stede getting this type of wound has made it symbolic. It would be a different wound if the creators just needed to kill Izzy off. Giving him this exact one does not give the situation a "time to go, bud" meaning, instead it connects Izzy more to the guys - and again, not in a familial sense but specifically a romantic one.
the show didn't spend nearly enough time on grieving given what Izzy is to the story. Instead, that was the only time of broken pacing and vibe tbh, it was a bit jarring (he dead. okay, now wedding). I mean, Im not expecting the SPN-final-death levels of time spent, but still.
There was no narrative sense for Izzy to die after the journey he had in S2. That was a character on the mend, having ALREADY paid off all their sins. A second punishment like that (and by cinema rules death is always either a tragedy (not that type of show here), a joke (not that type of show or situation) or a punishment) is undeserved and illogical.
By the end of S2 Stede was not being his best, but rather kind of an asshole. This character clearly has not finished his journey yet to settle in an "inn" or whatever. Which means that the guys are there only for the purpose of being close to the grave for when Izzy gets back.
If we assume that removing Izzy was important for BlackBonnet - why? To make them closer? What is he, their child or parent (not even really a friend), why would his death make them closer? Plus, they already got to that point without his help. It would make a bit of sense if he was Ed's pronounced romantic ex who was still a threat that needed to go but that's not the case. It would make a bit of sense if he was Ed's pronounced past / the Blackbeard that needed to die - and to be clear, he was (WAS) that to a certain degree in S1 and the creators tried to use that point - BUT Ed ALREADY both rejected his past/BB persona (via Jack for instance) AND also accepted and embraced that part of himself. The narrative tells us that Ed learned to use his "darkness" for relative good, to protect those around him or as means to achieve something good. Izzy did not need to be cut off for this plotpoint.
It would make sense to write the character out if the actor needed it. But we know for a fact that Con loves playing Izzy. So not the case either.
S2 specifically established with Ed's "gravy basket" situation that none of those idiots know how to certify someone's death.
Izzy somehow being back after this gives (more) purpose to the whole Buttons Burb situation. Introing what, real magic (??) into the show was a weird point in itself (and it was not refuted in the show as, say, Ed's confusion) but also a point that went kinda nowhere. But it's not "nowhere" if it was needed for S3 Izzy return!
The only kinda one real point towards Izzy really being gone is
cinema rule number whatever: they show the character's dead face with open eyes. And the show did do that… But again, freakin Bird Buttons flew on his grave. So Izzy definitely comes out of it.
But thank you for giving us a chance to enjoy Con's impeccable dying acting!
#ofmd#our flag means death#izzy hands#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd meta#does this count as meta? what is meta
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Hello Puppet pals + Romeo fans
would you like a fresh, fun new dose of pain tonight
On Romeo (long post)
So way back in april, in the taiwan event they showed some material from what looks like early builds of the game. this is the still i want to talk about today
It's gepetto (romanized to "zepeto" here) asking if we've "killed the beast".
In the released version, we meet him outside in rosa isabelle street after the KOP fight. It looks as though he's even beside the same lamppost. There's no other similar scene of us meeting gepetto like this, so it's likely referring to the puppet king. (When we meet him on the bridge, he's seen that the donkey has been killed, so we wouldn't need to lie.) but the thing is, this question is a YES OR NO ANSWER, meaning one or the other would be a lie.
So maybe in the early versions of the game it was actually possible align with/spare the puppet king (and by extension romeo) and then lie to Geppetto about it. (I mean, it's possible that it's simply just lying about not killing him to G, and we couldn't spare him to begin with)
I think they realized that they couldn't possibly make such a narratively important boss fight optional and that story-wise it wasn't linear enough to work. The story as a whole is not nearly as effective without his loss.
TLDR: I'm speculating that that image was from an early version of the game, and Romeo could've actually lived but the devs made the hard call against this.
[It's also possible that they just made that image for the purposes of presentation, and that it doesn't mean anything, or that it's another beast entirely.]
But still, somehow it makes it the more tragic. *stares blankly into space.*
(bonus fun notes below)
In this IGN interview before release, Director Choi dropped a big hint about romeo here.
youtube
"Yes, this is the king of puppets. And we want to call him a character and not a monster, because he will be the centre of the story. So if you play more and discover more about him, you'll find out more about what he is and who he is."
the puppet king being lampwick was also inadvertently leaked by IGN in this video:
youtube
I don't think people unfamiliar with the story would know anything, but pinoheads definitely would've and did recognize what "romeo" alluded to
They kept Romeo's ENTIRE EXISTENCE a secret up until launch. During the roughly two years of promotions before release there was never any mention of Romeo before release. Zip, Nada, so much so that the budding fanbase was starting to assume that he wouldn't even be in the game. NO ONE saw it coming when we found out who exactly we killed. Developers did consider that people who had read the book would catch on to particular things, so, bravo neowiz
And here's the other ingenious thing - they showed us the "Mad Donkey" boss early on in the demo and NOW I'm starting to wonder if this was a deliberate play. Almost everyone assumed this was already the game's iteration of Lampwick, so Romeo came as a surprise, and I think the proceeding story reveals about who the King of Puppets truly was were very effective.
also.. it's extremely cute what they did with the character. Of course, Romeo is the canonical name of Lampwick in Pinocchio, but the name "Romeo" is also probably the most heavily associated with Shakespeare's play Romeo and Juliet (which also takes place in Italy, as does Pinocchio!). And then we meet him in a theatre, and he puts on a play for us before we fight. Romeo supposedly had an affinity for acting, as Carlo did with the piano (I have heard this around on reddit, I don't know where this originates from, please lmk if you've seen these lore items). But most of all, Romeo and Juliet is a deeply remembered tragedy - like Lampwick in collodi's pinocchio. They are two young boys who didn't get away.
(maybe all of this was so obvious to everyone else but i love it still haha)
Fun to revisit this stuff after release with new clarity.
[To Reiterate - All of this is just my speculation]
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Your recent posts about Gojo... It's literally why I interact less and less in fandom. People see hot characters and project stereotypes on them without a care of what they are
It can sound petty especially with how it doesn't matter in the long run but it's like seeing people saying that in a no curse au Sukuna would be a playboy... Like yeah it's an au, he will be a bit different (like not being a mass murderer cannibal) but that is just... Seem so ooc to me, even in an au.
But well yeah. They just change them into male lead of romance novels. They don't matter in another context to them which is why you'll see me blow up about how vain it all feel like
Another example is how interesting Jogo is but nobody care about him because they don't want to fuck him. Like his last fight with Sukuna? The fact that he's the first person Sukuna ever praised for being strong in the story? A "stand proud. You are strong." Like? When I game to this moment I was zo shocked because it's not expected on Sukuna at all. And how Jogo mourned the death of Hanami and Dagon too?!
Yeah you know I just know now that outside of fanworks it's better to just ignore fellow fans because they have nothing to say beside how hot a character is
It really does suck that when it comes to liking a character some people just stop at their appearance and that's it. Nothing else intrigues them and they go as far as to misinterpret them -> leading into misinterpreting the story and having terrible ass cold takes that just feels like they need something to say to make them sound "logical".
And it's people like that who are the loudest. So when others want to engage in the story and they check out meta posts and reviews for it, they'll see that trash first and run with it.
When JJK first came out, I did see it was quite popular but at most I saw fanart for it and kind of just ignored everything else. I went ahead with watching the anime and then went to see what people were saying and honestly? What the hell?
Gojo is a character that has a bad case of "likeable character, unlikeable fans".
I truly do believe that some of his fans only take to him for being attractive and powerful. When it comes to his story? "Eh, what's that?"
Look, I'm all for finding characters attractive. I, myself, find some characters attractive. But I don't see the thrill of stopping there when that character also has a whole story you can explore.
I know Gojo fans are mad, but... his pretty ass is in a story that is meant to be written tragically. People will say "he should be the MC, that's my MC". Well, guess what? He's part of the main cast, so his ass is getting that full experience.
I like Gojo a lot, too, I do. But watching the first season, something deep in my soul told me "oh, he's a sad one", so I guess a part of me was already prepared for something like 236.
This is going to sound harsh, but when he said "I would win" way back in the beginning? I clocked in that he, in fact, wouldn't. That fight against Sukuna was going to be a lost battle. Oh, I believed in Gojo and I wanted him to win. But whenever a nearly, seemingly invincible character say they are going to win... most likely they're going to lose.
And again, it's JJK. There's going to be loses and agony. It also doesn't matter sense for Gojo to win when YUJI STILL EXISTS!!! Like, sometimes, I feel like some of the fandom just wants Gojo to take the frontlines just so Yuji can't do anything.
I didn't expect for him to die, no. Still hurts. But... come on... the manga wasn't ending that soon.
The fanon interpretations I see of him (Gojo) is just... if you asked me to pick one I hate the most it is the "Gojo is a womanizer/playboy" interpretation. Same case for Sukuna, I do not see it. Especially, when in canon this guy just does not care for all of that. But it's fanon stuff and since I don't like it, I just steer clear of it.
And good point about Jogo. I'll be honest, I find that the Disaster Curses were interesting antagonists of the beginning of JJK. They were the first real threats for our cast. They were challenges.
They were curses made from humanity's fear of disasters and other humans. And yet, even with being curses, they showed "human" qualities. They were able to talk, a rare case for curse spirits, and feel other emotions. Mahito often displayed joy, example. Dagon and Jogo displayed sadness. They were a group that did hold some care for each other.
And yeah, I would say because of their physical appearances they're often ignored. (Unimportant, but I actually loved Hanami's design, that's my favorite design right there.)
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Lily of the Valley
Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam
Summary: Jason Todd dies and comes back to life. As the League takes him in, he navigates his morality and family values over the years.
Chapters: 16/?
Characters: Jason Todd, Talia al Ghul, Ra’s al Ghul, Damian Wayne, Barbara Gordon, Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne, Sheila Haywood
Relationships: Jason Todd/Original Character(s)
Additional Tags: Immortal Jason Todd, League of Assassins Jason Todd, Protective Talia al Ghul, Good Parent Talia al Ghul, Jason Todd Needs a Hug, Good Sibling Jason Todd, Hurt/Comfort, Adopted Children, Resurrected Jason Todd
Chapter Sixteen: Tobacco Jasmine
One night in the infirmary, Saru had a nightmare, and Jason limped over to her bed to wake her. He clutched his side with one arm and held a book in the other. "Saru? Can I—? Saru," Jason nudged her. She took a sharp breath and opened her eyes, smiling once she made his face out in the dark.
"Did I wake you?" Saru asked. Jason shook his head. He'd been awake for hours. He raised his book and Saru nodded, allowing Jason to sit beside her on the bed.
"My neighbors, you remember the dawn of youth with pleasure and regret its passing," Jason read. Saru inched closer to him and looked into his eyes. He stammered, swallowing hard before taking a breath, and continued the story. Saru didn't mind. She found his reading voice to be warm and sweet. Jason would stop in between pages to glance at her to see if he'd lost her interest. The novel was short, but Jason read it in a way that made it feel real. "Real beauty lies in the spiritual accord that is called love which can exist between a man and a woman."
Saru wanted to kiss him, but she knew he was far too shy for such an outward display of affection. His innocence would not allow it, so she lay her head on his shoulder and smiled. Jason stopped and offered a soft hum of approval. The sun rose on the horizon, illuminating the infirmary as the tale came to its tragic end. Jason looked at Saru and her closed eyes before moving toward the edge of the bed. "Don't go," Saru whispered. Jason sat in place. "I was listening."
"Did you like it?" Jason questioned. Saru nodded.
"Jason, can I tell you something? You have to promise not to be self-conscious," Saru gently spoke as she reached for his hand.
"I'll try not to," Jason answered.
"Have you ever noticed the light your eyes give off in the dark? It's not human," Saru pointed out. Jason blinked hard and looked at her. "I don't think it's strange... It's actually stunning. You're like a moonflower. You look so beautiful at night." Jason let her hold his hand, and she nestled close to him, so close he could smell the spiced floral scent in her hair.
"Thank you. Saru, you have a beauty that most people only see once in their entire lives. Every time I look at you, I feel you've given me a gift," Jason smiled.
Saru squeezed his hand. "I think I can rest now," Saru whispered, "Unless you'd like to talk." Jason shook his head and made a soft noise.
"No... You should rest. I should go speak with my mother. I haven't seen her since the match," Jason replied as he stood up. She let go of his hand and turned her face away. Jason walked down the hall, careful not to make noise and alarm the nurses.
He crept into Talia's room and nudged her. Talia sat up and smoothed his hair back. "What are you doing out of the infirmary?" Talia asked. Jason smiled. Talia hadn't seen him that happy in years. "What is it?"
"Could I ask your permission for something?" Jason questioned.
Talia knit her brows together. He'd never asked her permission for anything before. "Go ahead," Talia replied with caution.
"Well, I'm nearly sixteen now... And I-. I'd like you to know I've never requested anything else... And I wouldn't ask you if I wasn't sure it was what I wanted—."
"Little one," Talia interrupted, "Don't agonize. It's not becoming." She chuckled as she held his face in her palms.
"Could I go on a date?" Jason asked. Talia's eyes widened.
"With who? Where?" Talia questioned. Jason's cheeks went rosy.
"I'd like to share a meal with Saru... Something special. At the end of the month," Jason answered, "Mama?"
Talia nodded. "Jason, can I ask you something?" Talia whispered as she climbed out of bed. Jason sat next to her. "Is it serious?"
Jason cocked his head. "Are you asking if I've kissed her?" Jason questioned. Talia smiled and kissed Jason's forehead.
"Have you told her that you like her?" Talia questioned. Jason nodded.
"Last night, I sat with her and read her a book," Jason described, "Then the sun came up while we held hands, and Mama... Mama, I haven't felt at peace in so long, but I felt like a teenager. I don't think I've ever felt like a teenager, and now I'm nearly sixteen... My teenage years will be over soon."
"You're right. Jason, I give you my permission to go on a date with Saru... But promise me one thing," Talia whispered.
"Anything, Mama," Jason whispered. Talia embraced him, and he clenched his fists to keep from wincing.
"No matter how old you get, you will always be my little one," Talia replied. Jason hugged her and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
"I promise, Mama," Jason whispered.
"Now go back to the infirmary. It's almost time for breakfast," Talia commanded. Jason chuckled and winced as he stood up and returned to the infirmary. Saru was completely unconscious by that time, and Damian sat next to Jason's empty bed.
"Gē? Where have you been?" Damian questioned.
"I missed Mama... Damian, what are you doing here?" Jason asked. Damian climbed into Jason's bed and pressed a kiss to his cheek.
"I thought you were lonely," Damian replied. A nurse entered and woke Saru before serving breakfast to Jason and Saru. Saru opened her eyes and glanced over at Damian.
"Good morning, bābu," Saru whispered. Damian grinned at her.
"Good morning, Saru... Are you and Jason friends now?" Damian asked. Saru nodded.
"He's a nice boy... Damian, can you believe your brother read to me last night?" Saru whispered excitedly. Damian laughed.
"No, not Gē," Damian shook his head.
"He did. He's an excellent storyteller," Saru replied. Damian glanced at Jason.
"Jason likes romance novels," Damian announced.
"Di!" Jason chastised him. His face reddened, and he couldn't bear to look up out of embarrassment.
Saru smiled. "It's a rare trait for someone as strong as Jason to be a romantic... His natural inclination towards empathy is a desirable trait. Not everyone is like that," Saru replied. Jason couldn't look up even if he wanted to. Jason wasn't used to commendation, especially in a romantic sense.
Damian leaned toward Jason to whisper in his ear. "Grandfather mentioned you at dinnertime last night," Damian confessed, "He said good things."
Jason kissed the top of Damian's head. "Should I speak with him?" Jason questioned. Damian nodded.
"He has to go away soon," Damian replied. Jason's appetite left him.
#fic#batfam#lily of the valley fic#Jason Todd#Talia al Ghul#Ra’s al Ghul#Damian Wayne#Barbara Gordon#Dick Grayson#Bruce Wayne#Sheila Haywood#Immortal Jason Todd#League of Assassins Jason Todd#Protective Talia al Ghul#Good Parent Talia al Ghul#Jason Todd Needs a Hug#Good Sibling Jason Todd#Hurt/Comfort#Adopted Children#Resurrected Jason Todd
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Isn't hilarious how Heiji parents are a lot more similar to Shinichi (much more composed and professional) and Shinichi ones are more similar to Heiji (much more eccentric and bizarre)???
I maybe find it a bit sad!
Both boys seem so disconnected from their parents. Episode 263 reveals that pizza bagel mom didn't even know that Heiji is the kendo captain for his school because he "doesn't tell [them] anything at home."
And at the end of Episode 221, we learn that she purposefully didn't go see Heiji in the hospital after he got shot (in Episode 118)!
Meanwhile, Shinichi gets poisoned and nearly killed, and he doesn't say a word about it to his parents. In "The Desperate Revival," there's a rare bit of emotion about his parents' absence, too. He expresses that he is upset that they've left him all alone in Japan for the past three years (Episode 192):
And of course the treatment that Heiji and Shinichi get from their parents may have nothing to do with a personality clash... but maybe it does. Maybe Heizo and Shizuka and Yukiko and Yusaku find that their children are nothing like they expected, and they distance themselves as a result.
I will say, though... I think there's something particularly tragic about Yukiko's few appearances across the series (that I've seen). The first time that she lays eyes on Conan, she looks absolutely distressed—as though she didn't want to believe that her son had nearly died and told her nothing about it, but she can't deny it any longer when she finds herself face to face with the truth (Episode 43):
And while it's maybe more overt in anime-original material like Episode 418, the plot-heavy Episode 345 does reveal that Yukiko worries about Shinichi... but she doesn't approach him. In that special, we learn that she's been hiding in their house and watching Shinichi secretly (and then promptly terrifies him when he investigates). In 418, it's practically the same scenario; Yukiko disguises herself and spies on Shinichi because that's the only way she believes she'll really know how he's doing. If she were to ask, she knows he wouldn't be honest with her.
I get the sense that Yukiko knows she's screwed up as a parent, but she has no idea how to "fix" it, and she goes about trying in... some less-than-ideal ways.
This is all long and rambling, but I was recently able to digitize my Detective Conan VHS tapes, and—at the moment! I've ordered the ones I'm missing!—that includes six of the eight Shogakukan Illustrated Encyclopedia Series releases (which you can find more information about here). They're kind of obscure Conan content because they were released on VHS only, and, well, spoilers from here on out, so do stop reading now if you don't wanna know.
But the ending of "A Written Challenge from the Pyramids!" got to me. I can't say I super understood the story, but I did understand that Yukiko seemingly can't announce to Shinichi that she's returning to Japan. She has to send riddles for him to solve rather than just say, I wanted to see my son.
And, sure. Maybe I'm thinking too hard. Shinichi likes solving codes. But I do find something kind of sad about how Yukiko feels like she has to connect with Shinichi through games and pranks rather than, you know, honesty.
Also, these tapes are a wild ride. I feel like everyone needs to experience this ending.
#i'm sorry i feel like none of this really has anything to do with the ask but i hope the silly vhs video makes up for it ^^;#replies#anonymous#ramblings#video#detective conan#case closed#shizuka hattori#yukiko kudo#heiji hattori#shinichi kudo#conan edogawa#long post
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Not sorry, but I believe Sanji's arranged marriage made WCI worse. I didn't like the arc that much already, but the marriage was extremely unnecessary.
I know the framing is supposed to show Sanji is kind, but to me Sanji's kindness was never called into question. Whole Cake did not bring it back or highlight it. We knew Sanji was kind when he was told to leave Gin to die on the baratie and Sanji fed him anyway. We knew Sanji was kind when he trusted Nami even after barely knowing her and tried to reassure the rest of the crew there must've been another reason for her leaving. He extended that same kindness to Usopp by defending him from Luffy during Enies Lobby. He even blamed Zoro for Usopp leaving at all!
He's kind enough to remember everyone's favorite foods and preferences BEFORE Whole Cake Island. His kindness is shown equally to men, women, and kids in multiple arcs both main, filler, and in one piece movies set during pre-time skip. Of course Sanji is kind. THIS KNOWLEDGE CAME FREE WITH YOUR PRE-TIME SKIP ANIME.
The poor attempt Whole Cake does is try to remind people Sanji is a nice guy after the horrible character assassination of making him an even bigger pervert which are two separate problems. The kindness was never drawn into question! We knew! We always knew! It's Oda's fault for deciding over and over again to make Sanji behave one step removed from "accidentally" groping women!
Like, Sanji's fandom wasn't built because he's strong like Zoro or fun like Luffy. Sanji's fandom derived from his gentleman schtick pre-time skip where he's genuinely fucking sweet when he's not twirling around like an idiot. If he was actually an intolerable gross pervert, it wouldn't matter how well he cooks. People would either have mixed feelings about him or they'd hate him. But post time skip Sanji???????? They were riding the fucking edge with that behavior. Like REALLY riding the edge! It was the cushion of his history that kept him popular along with the hope that they'd fucking tone it down!!!!! They wanted the grossness toned down! They didn't need a reminder of the kindness!
Add the fact that he didn't need A SECOND ALTERNATIVE BACKSTORY???? Apparently nearly starving to death on an uninhabitable island with a man willing to eat his own leg so the child had a shot at survival wasn't tragic enough for some people?!??!?? What does Judge's relation to Sanji add other than a last name he doesn't want and never claims? What do his supposedly emotionless family generate when Sanji has already been the character that chooses kindness when surrounded by cruel people. He's a freaking pirate! That's a normal Tuesday on some of the islands they go to! What did this arc add to him that made me look at his behavior differently? Should I thank Oda for adding another dead mom to his corpse arsenal, or will I acknowledge the fact he probably just wanted to add a super sentai reference so he could cover every style of anime in his giant storybook?
And I don't want to say Whole Cake was a bust. I mean Jinbei is there!! We finally get to see what kind of real threat Big Mom is!!! The Charlotte family is a colorful and tasty looking cast!!!! Sure the Katakuri fight wasn't nearly as exciting as other big encounters but there were big plot relevant things within the story including a connection to punk hazard! Yet, the whole thing with Sanji's biological family and this arranged marriage was the dumbest segway for us to get this information!
#one piece#black leg sanji#sanji#also pudding is 16 and i dont like that at all#why like why why why why why
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Bolts upright from my bed
In an AU where Pharma lives the Adaptus thing and comes back on the Lost Light, wouldn't he find out that the crew had to deal with being cornered and nearly killed by the DJD and a bunch of other Decepticons?
And then Pharma could get to be like "oh I see :) you were under threat by the DJD :))) why didn't you just run? Oh you couldn't and had no means of escape? Funny :)))) didn't you call for help? Oh you did right??? And did anyone come???? :)))))) did anyone come in time to save you from the DJD????? DID THEY????? DID YOU JUST CALL FOR HELP AND RUN AWAY AND THE DJD JUST LET YOU GO????? :))))))))))) OH THE DJD BLOCKED COMMUNICATIONS AND HAD YOU SURROUNDED????? OH HOW TRAGIC I GUESS YOU COULDN'T ESCAPE AFTER ALL AND A LOT OF YOUR FRIENDS DIED :)))))))))))))))) AND THE ONLY REASON YOU WON WAS BECAUSE YOU HAD A LOT OF SUPERPOWERFUL FIGHTERS ON YOUR SIDE???? WOW IMAGINE WHAT MIGHT'VE HAPPENED IF YOU HAD NO FRIENDS AND BARELY ANY MILITARY SUPPORT AND THE DJD CAME HUH??? WOW WHAT A RELIEF THAT DIDNT HAPPEN"
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In other words, I'm pretty much convinced that the reason Pharma is remembered as "the evil cowardly doctor that murdered innocents to save his own skin" instead of "the Autobot that got mindbroken by Tarn into thinking that making a plague and killing everyone was his only way to escape" is because he got introduced before the DJD were established as a pants-shittingly evil and sadistic group of freaks, and unlike Rodimus' crew he didn't have the luxury of being a main character whose thoughts and experiences were shown on screen. Pretty much his reputation as "crazy token evil Autobot" was sealed from MTMTE #5 and by the time MTMTE #50-something brought Dying of the Light, Pharma was a footnote in the story and never got to have this new information about the terror of the DJD factored into his own character.
#squiggposting#pharma apologism#i mean isnt there literally a scene in dying of the light where tarn talks about how drawing out his strike#makes the enemy suffer more from degradation and panic#and megatron says that he wrote the DJD manifesto to be about systematically isolating and tormenting targets b4 actually killing them#and when they send out an SOS its not received until literally weeks later#and pretty much the only reason most of them survived was bc of spark trauma magic#and having a mad scientist that could make super badass upgrades and weapons#but oh when PHARMA doesnt call for help and doesnt run away it's just bc hes evil and cowardly#i mean i know in the text he says that he just wanted to get away with his name cleared but like#how can you look at what the DJD did in future chapters and go oh yeah pharma did what he did#just because hes prideful and didnt want to ask for help or get caught for his misdeeds#like sure that's the only part the narrative shows but that's prolly bc pharma wasnt meant to be that deep#from a doylist view there wouldnt have been room in the story for this random side villain to get a sad backstory#anyways it just really. gets my goat lmao#the difference b/t pharma and the LL crew on necroworld in terms of audience sympathy#was basically just placement in the story and screentime#hence why pharma is just a crazy evil doctor who sucks at being an autobot#and the LL crew are brave heroes and friends making a last stand against evil#good for the LL crew that they could actually fight back but uh. pharma couldnt#abyways sorry for being weird about pharma on main it will happen again
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Do you consider Elijah to be redeemable?
It depends what you mean by redeemable.
If we are talking in terms of TVDU standards, sure. If we are talking in terms of normal standards for redemption, probably not.
In TVDU, there's this expression everyone likes to use, "they aren't evil, just broken." I hate this expression. Very few people in life or in fiction are straight evil because it is not very compelling. Villains with tragic backstories give complexity to the story. If you look at the vast majority of villains in any fiction, they will have origin stories that make them behave the way they do. But this doesn't excuse their evil acts. Which is why I hate the expression. Sure, they weren't born that way and we can blame whatever events made them that way, but until the character/writers take accountability, redemption is not possible.
A redemption arc needs a fleshed out character with a lot of dimension. Aka a good backstory with complex plots throughout with internal/external conflicts, accountability, and change of behavior. The Mikaelsons are set up decently for redemption arcs since the more dramatic/terrible their origin story is, the more likely people will root for them. That's why we see so many characters who honestly haven't done nearly as many bad things as the main characters get less chances from the audience for redemption. There needs to be something to make the audience sympathize with why they are behaving that way. It's also why we often see villains with tragic childhoods, because what tugs on the heartstrings more than seeing a broken child who can't protect themselves so they learn to be evil so they will never be hurt again.
Elijah has a good backstory, at least if you are paying attention to him. Some of his backstory gets lost in Klaus since the show focuses so hard on him. But Elijah canonically grew up in an abusive household. He was pretty neglected and given a lot of responsibility at a young age. He was also growing up in a very different time and likely didn't learn proper ways to cope with life/emotions. His brother dies and then his father kills him. He's then forced to turn into a vampire and loses the woman he loves and the future he hoped for. This is all just the first 1% of his life. Throughout his life, he is dealing with his siblings, his vampirism, losing people, being betrayed by the people he loves, etc. This all creates a pretty sympathetic villain. Especially when you look at his motivations.
Elijah's motivations change a bit throughout the shows. In TVD, he really comes across as a family man. He is ready to kill Klaus for what he did to their siblings and is constantly trying to reunite with all of them (including Finn and Kol). Now when we go over to TO, his motivation seems to revolve around Klaus and Hope with Rebekah not far behind. His motivations help with his redemption, even if his limited focus in TO is annoying. Killing for the thrill of it is harder to redeem than killing for the protection of family. While it doesn't make it okay, most people can understand the reasoning. I've said it before, I don't defend Elijah for all of his actions, but at the same time, I can't say most people wouldn't do anything to protect their families.
Unlike a lot of the Mikaelsons, Elijah does seem to take some accountability for his actions. He knows what he is. He's not proud of it and feels deep guilt for his actions. The issue we get into with Elijah is we don't see a lot of positive change of behavior. He has a moral code, one that was much stricter in TVD, and continues to get blurred the more his is pushed into a corner. I often blame the writers for switching out his personality traits with Klaus in order to build Klaus' redemption because we do see Klaus become more family focused and less blood thirsty in season 3/4 while Elijah seems to go off the rails, killing anything he perceives to be a threat (like a certain paranoid hybrid we know). The writers do this because, again, Elijah is the more redeemable of the two. Klaus's motivations have always held him back for that. It's hard to redeem a character who kills for fun and takes joy in abusing their family members. But a family man who acts to protect their family, even if it's by doing terrible things, is much easier to work in a redemption arch.
Since TO is focused on the Mikaelsons, I think they all could have had redemptions. Again redemption in the context of TVDU. Practically everyone but Elijah gets a redemption/chance at a happy ending. Although, I tend to disagree that Klaus actually had one. Elijah's positive motivation and fatal flaws were intertwined. His attachment to his family made him do terrible things. I've written a story, The Last Sacrifice, which I think gives Elijah a type of redemption that is possible for his character. Yes, it does involve him sacrificing himself for his family. I think this is the only true redemption for him since he was so willing to sacrifice others for his family, it needed to come full circle. He could improve his character and his behaviors in a lot of ways, but it's not truly a redemption since he isn't learning from his past behaviors. Again, his fatal flaw is harming people for his family to stay together, so for him, to make the ultimate sacrifice for his family to stay together, even without him, would be a sort of redemption.
The reason I say no for normal standards is because the Mikaelsons, each and every one of them, have all just done too many bad things. They could sacrifice themselves for the world but it still wouldn't really change anything. It wouldn't fix the harm they've caused in the world or their underlying questionable motivations. Now, I know redemption arcs don't need to solve all the past problems, but the Mikaelsons are inherently morally grey at best. It's hard to keep them in character while also truly redeeming them. I love them, but they are not good people.
Thanks for the ask!
#elijah mikaelson is morally grey at best#love him but he needs some serious therapy#tvdu#the originals#the vampire diaries#elijah mikaelson#tvd#the mikaelsons#anon ask#fandom asks#redemption arcs#fandom#tvd ask#fandom answers#tvd anon ask#andrea831 metas#andrea831 metas elijah#andrea831 metas mikaelson
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I saw someone recommend Babel: Or the Necessity of Violence: An Arcane History of the Oxford Translators' Revolution by R.F. Kuang as an example of a fantasy story with no romance in it, and tilted my head curiously, thinking about what radically different things a story can mean to different readers. Because when I read it, I saw a significant subplot devoted to deliciously subtle, tragically unrealised queer love story between Robin and Ramy.
It lived in unanswered questions and charged silences*. It was hard to look at, hard to understand, in a world with such rigid expectations and strict social rules. It was a forbidden love on multiple levels, between two boys who were meant to devote their hearts and minds to serving the British empire above all personal concerns, between two boys who were meant to love women if anyone at all. In a story all about the magic of words, it was unspoken, unspeakable, but still not unacknowledged. They knew, or almost knew, and were getting gradually, infinitesimally closer to someday putting words to it, if only between themselves, until Ramy died and all that possibility died with him.**
It's about being closeted. It's about meeting the first other person you've ever known who's like you. It's about inching towards something you have no roadmap for. It's about the long history of tragic homoerotic vibes between British academics. It's about the love that dare not speak its name. It's about yet another thing the Translation Institute took from Robin, that's simultaneously yet another thing the Translation Institute gave him.
It's about another thing Letty's privilege blinded her to. A white woman wanting a brown man, and killing him for rejecting her***, never seeing the reason in the same way that she never saw the racism her friends were subjected to on a daily basis. A love triangle, mirroring the one between Griffin, Sterling and Evie, though Letty didn't know it was a triangle and couldn't even imagine that Ramy might care for Robin instead or that Robin might have his own desires beyond comforting her in her heartbreak. Robin asked Ramy why he didn't dance with her, and he said Don't you know why?*. Later that night Letty wept drunkenly into Robin's shoulder, asking Why doesn't he see me?, and he knew better than to tell her the truth****.
*p. 244:
"She wants you," Robin said. ... "Very badly. So why—"
"Don't you know why?"
Their eyes met. Robin felt a prickle at the back of his neck. The space between them felt very charged, like the moment between lightning and thunder, and Robin had no idea what was going on or what would happen next, only that it all felt very strange and terrifying, like teetering over the edge of a windy, roaring cliff.
**p. 410
One day Robin would ask himself how his shock had turned so easily to rage; why his first reaction was not disbelief at this betrayal but black, consuming hatred. And the answer would elude and disturb him, for it tiptoed around a complicated tangle of love and jealousy that ensnared them all, for which they had no name or explanation, a truth they'd only been starting to wake up to and now, after this, would never acknowledge.
***p. 503
"I think she wanted him dead," he continued hoarsely. "You could see it on her face – she wasn't scared, she knew what she was doing, she could have aimed at any one of us, and she knew it was Ramy she wanted."
"Robin ..."
"She loved him, you know," he said. The words came out of him like a torrent now; the floodgates were broken, and the waters could not be stopped. No matter how devastating, how tragic, he had to say it out loud, had to burden someone else with this awful, awful suspicion. "She told me, the night of the commemoration ball – she spent nearly an hour weeping into my shoulder because she wanted to dance with him, and he wouldn't even look at her. He never looked at her, he didn't ..." He had to stop, his tears threatened to choke him.
****p. 249
"I wish he would see me," she kept repeating. "Why won't he see me?" And though Robin could think of any number of reasons – because Ramy was a brown man in England and Letty the daughter of an admiral; because Ramy did not want to be shot in the street; or because Ramy simply did not love her like she loved him, and she'd badly mistaken his general kindness and ostentatious verve for special attention, because Letty was the kind of girl who was used to, and had come to always expect, special attention – he knew better than to tell her the truth. ... He had the oddest feeling of disappearing as he spoke, of fading into the background of a painting depicting a story which must have been as old as history.
(Despite how long this ended up getting, footnotes and all, I'm not trying to argue that my interpretation is right and the 'no romance' interpretation is wrong - I love the ambiguity, and think it's genuinely fascinating how this reading jumped out so clearly to me, a bisexual who spent a significant amount of my late teens pining over my best friend while coming to terms with my sexuality, while another reader with a different perspective saw something else entirely.)
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Hey, no need to respond to this, truly, but I just had to say something. Feel free to ignore and I won’t bother you about this again, but it makes me uncomfortable how you portray Riko as this traumatized kid who just needs love&attention in your writing when he is canonically an abuser. He nearly beat Jean to death and ordered other Ravens to rape him. He broke Kevin’s hand and tried to emotionally abuse him into returning to him. He helped Drake cross state borders while he was being investigated for child sexual assault and pointed him at Andrew. He paid Proust to assault Andrew. He tied Neil to a bed and tortured him. He killed Seth. Yes, his backstory is tragic but he is an abuser. And it’s uncomfortable reading about how his victims should feel sorry for him bc now they’re older and more mature and Riko “was a kid”. I recognize you have the right to write what you want, I just wanted to tell you how it reads. I’m not trying to be mean or harass you & I won’t send anything else other than this. And do not post this to the public if you don’t want to! Seriously, I’m not trying to be mean or hurt your feelings, you’re a great writer and I don’t believe you meant anything malicious or were trying to communicate what I took from how you wrote Riko, just that that’s how it comes off.
Hey, I am going to respond to this just because I want to be clear that I am writing Riko very very aware of the fact that he has done things in the books that make me really dislike / hate him as a person. Still, as a character there are things I want to explore with him y’know?
Especially from people who he really has no power over at this point. Especially from people who he did use to have power over at one point.
Some of this might be coming across a certain way just due to the fact that I had some ideas earlier on in the writing of these that I've discard. Such is the nature of a WIP. The other part is that a lot of the snippets are missing broader context. Such is the nature of a Snippet.
Either way you're fine to be uncomfortable with that and to not like how I'm writing it but I do just want to cover generally how I'm approaching Riko in the 2 AUs I'm really treating him differently than canon.
In the Math Nerd AU I want to explore a Neil who is a lot older and who still, honestly, hates Riko. He hates him and would love to watch him sink into the pits of hell once again.... but he's also a Neil who has grown a lot since he was 18-19 and dealing with Riko the first time around. He's a Neil who not only benefited from but now truly and absolutely believes in the power of giving someone a chance. Wymack has had that level of influence on his thinking.
He was a Captain and stayed close with the Foxes and Wymack over the years. He has seen all of the kids that Wymack gave 2nd chances to.
Some of them deserved that second chance and they utilize it.
Some of them deserved that second chance and failed to utilize it.
Some of them didn't deserve those second chances and did utilize it.
Some of them didn't deserve that second chance and proved that they didn't deserve it.
Wymack still offered it to all of them and he didn't always like those kids but Wymack still did his best to help them. Neil thinks Wymack died with his only regret being that he didn't have a chance to drink the pricey bourbon they'd gotten him and that he wouldn't get to call Kevin after his games.
Neil WANTS / NEEDS / CRAVES that peace of mind for reasons I'm not going to touch on here because it doesn't involve Riko.
I have decided on a few things that are different from the initial description, such is the nature of a WIP.
Its not quite clear in the snippets because hey they’re snippets and not the full story and honestly I’ve avoided doing these snippets from Neil’s POV. All Neil is doing right now? He’s offering Riko a chance and that's it.
What Riko does with that chance I haven’t touched on at all. Neil is offering a Riko an opportunity to stop before he sinks his own ship and Neil won't even toss a life preserver because watching him drown was immensely personally satisfying to Neil last time. What he wants is the certainty that there was no redeeming Riko, that there was no excuse, and that he's totally normal for thinking about how Riko looked the night he died with warmth. If Riko proves him wrong? If all Riko really did need was someone he had no power over to treat him like a person and not a commodity?
It'd be the ultimate proof that anyone can benefit from a second chance, that Wymack was always right to offer it. He'd be okay with that too.
I also want to explore what Neil can gain by delaying the satisfaction he got the first time around by outright telling Riko to just fuck off. How playing it a bit nicer / smarter with Riko means that the Foxes are safer and also gives him the opportunity to protect other people he has had a hand in saving. Andrew was the first person that Neil saved when he went back in time, but he wasn't the last. Neil also wasn't always successful in saving some people despite his foreknowledge.
Again, nature of the WIP and nature of the Snippet were not everything is here since I sure as hell am not writing this in order with the snippets but I am going to touch on it in a WIP Wednesday ask pretty soon, probably once I finish this beast / make myself dinner.
For New Kings it's a lot easier since mostly I'm treating Riko as a joke. Someone who wants to be a threat, who remembers being terrifying to these Foxes. Except now he...just kind of isn't. He has no power over any of them. Like Nicky said, he's seen home loans scarier than Riko is at this point.
It really is them just seeing someone they remember being so huge and threatening and scary and…..its just this sad sack 20 something playing at being God because he’s good at a sport. Honestly, in comparison to what some of them got up to later? He's not even that good.
They won’t take him seriously because why the fuck should they? That would just feed into his already insane ego. In my experience there’s nothing that upsets an abuser more than his once victims just won’t give him any power over them. (Again its the nature of the snippet in that its not the full picture and I haven’t even covered Riko’s reaction to the Fox’s dismissal of him as a threat in all its unhinged glory nor Renee's grand theft Moreau.)
STILL, if that isn’t something you want to read then please just add the tags #Math Nerd AU and #New Kings AU or ME (jtl-fics & justthislazy) to a block list. I'm religious about tagging so if you still want to read other stuff then just blacklisting those tags will keep you safe.
I can add Riko Moriyama as a tag on the parts that involve / mention him if you still want to read the snippets that don't include him.
I’m not out here to make someone uncomfortable but I do want to explore these things in my writing. It might change the further I go but it might not so please proceed at your comfort level.
Thank you for writing to me with your concern and I’m more than happy to accommodate with tags if you wanna message me.
Still, like you said, I'm going to write what I want.
#my writing#Riko Moriyama#Math Nerd AU#New Kings AU#This thing is very wordy#TL;DR Right now it's a WIP with SNIPS and I haven't put the full context out#I am thankful for this ask so people can make the decision if they want to read further#I will now take a shower cook dinner and write some more ASK WIPS
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Next up for Cartoon Network era of shows, who is your favorite character from each of the mid-2000s CN City-era shows you've seen like: Megas XLR, Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends, Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi, Life & Times of Juniper Lee, Camp Lazlo, My Gym Partner's a Monkey, Ben 10 2005, Squirrel Boy, and Class of 3000?
Okay since I didn't fuckup last time we can jump straight in
Megas XLR: Coop. He's a fun walking disaster and voice acted amazingly. As for the show itself.. it's pure gold to me. A classic. A fun, nonsensical mech show with a clever premise and beautiful animation. It could use a tweak or two if it was revivied, but I dig it.
Fosters Home for IMaginary Friends; Wilt. He's one of Phil Lamar's best rolls, has a great design and the good wilt hunting special fleshed him out heartbreakingly. As for the show itself it's pretty good: it does suffer from that issue the earlier cn shows had where sometimes it's a bit too mean spirited, but it's not nearly as frequent and the colorful character design, wonderful premise, and truly outstanding cast from Frankie, everyone who was into women's crush as a kid, to Herriman who I hated as a kid (and still do at times, he's a prick), but now respect as a more complicated genltemanly prick who simply need to ease up a bit, but you get WHY he's like this as he's running a pretty wacky boarding house and madam foster while kind isn't really doing the day to day stuff. A truly great cartoon.
Hi HI Puffy AmiYumi: I like yumi. As for the series itself..ehhh. Besides the obvious of "You shoudln't of had two american women, even really talented ones, play two japanese women', it's just kinda .. there? the music's good, the character design is great, but it's got no real substance. Maybe on a rewatch i'd be wrong, but it's just kinda eh.
Life and Times of Juniper Lee: Out of the regular cast, Dennis, who evolved from "just kinda being there" to "a fun addition to the main cast". Supporting it's Kai Yee, as most of June's rogue's gallery is weak (Aunti Roo and Loki accepted), but he was the shot in the arm the series needed and had the series stuck around I wouldn't be suprised if we saw him again. The show itself is solid though: Judd WInnick copied Buffy's notes well, while adding his own spin to things, and the tragic idea of June being stuck is heartbreaking but intresting. IT has a good mythology, a solid lead and it's only weakness was June's friends being locked out, which is something they WERE going to work on but got canclled. Not in the highest tier of the animated superhero shows at the time (Jake Long eats it's lunch), but still worthy of being part of them all the same.
Camp Lazlo: Hard choice as everyone is pretty great, but I have to go with Edward who started as just a generic bully but evolved into this petty dick who can't accept no one likes him for good reason that just stands out to me. I do mean it when I say I love pretty much everyone though. This show is a fond part of my childhood, one I wish was streaming on max and given hbo's current practices, will hopefully land on Tubi as it's underated. Admiteely I love a good summer camp story, and this series might be why, so i'm biased.. but my love for Joe Murray's other big work helps me see it was also just THAT good, a fun summer camp adventure. Ignore the finale I haven't seen and don't intend to, but enjoy everything else. This series is a treasure that's on rocko's level, at least from memory and deserves all the praise.
My Gym Partner's A Monkey: MONKEY MONKEY MONKEY. I like Ingrid for her having to lean down and crush on Adam and I like Principal Bulfrog for both being hilarous and being at the center of the only episode I really loved so let's call this a tie. Their both great. And as you can tell by that last part yeah.. I hate this one. It has a decent if stupid premise, but it leans way too heavily on kafka comedy: adam tends to get buffeted around for no reason, jake is an asshole, and most of the cast follows suit. Even Bullfrog is a dick, he's just at least you know.. funny. The episode with the robot teachers is the one I like.. because it's just wacky nonsense and ends with a wizard for some reason. The show had chaotic energy but squandred it on making adam miserable when he'd done nothing wrong.
Ben 10: Vilgax. Max was close, he's a great mentor.. but Vilgax is such a memorable villian despite only showing up as an ominous guy in a tube for most of season one and only in his full glory four times, one of which I haven't seen. But Steve Blum leaves an impression for him, this unstoppable MONSTER who easily tears through Bens creatures. Ghostfreak is also close, but Vilgax has more personalitY: While his goals are simple, to conquer you get a sense of arrogance and superiority he ENTIRELY backs up. The series made their own thanos or darkseid and it was glorious. He suffers a bit in the sequels as the mouth thing was a BAD design choice, but man is he great. As for the series itself.. also great. Really need to rewatch it at some point, but it's a solid superhero show and sets itself apart from the other kid sueprhero works of the time.. by having it be a child instead of a teen, with all the impulsivness, over the top names and enthusasim that entails. Ben's a brat, but he's not a bad kid and his childish impulsivness lets the series go more places. The concept of taking dial h for hero and applying truly awesome alien designs to it is fucking brilliant and improves on the original idea amazingly. Add in tons of lore, great villians 3/4 seasons, and you can see why Cartoon Network milked this series as long as it did and why it'll probably return some day after some cooling off.
Squirrel Boy: Kurtwood Smith dad only for virtue of being voiced by Kurtwood Smith. I almost picked no one. This show wasn't good, it was boring and I don't like it. A waste of everyone involved and not one I really care to revisit. It's probably not bad as my memory but lord it isn't good.
Class of 3000: SING, NA NA NA NA NA. Principal Luna both for being consitantly funny and his awesome music number. And I only didn't see season 2 because I wasn't aware it happened till it was too late. I need to rewatch this one. A true cult classic that deserved better: Andre 3000 was clearly all in and game for whatever, the series itself had a great cast, and the musical numbers are all bangers all the time.
So that ends this one. Next I see a LOT more superhero shows coming, robots in disguise and more. I actually love doing this as it givces me a chance to talk about great shows I simply haven't yet.
#cartoon network#ben 10#class of 3000#my gym partner's a monkey#camp lazlo#fosters home for imaginary friends#the life and times of juniper lee#megas xlr
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Season One of Percy Jackson and the Olympians is FINE
All and all, I'd say it's a fine adaptation of the first book.
The spirit is very much in place. The story's sense of humor and light drama is present and well balanced through the show. One moment you have a gripping discussion of Sally explaining she fell in love with a god, and it's followed by Percy asking if she found Jesus. It's a funny line that doesn't undercut the drama because that's exactly what a kid like Percy would ask. Even some bits that WEREN'T in the book that very well could have been, like Mr. D lying to Percy about being his father for some cheap booze or the gosh dang Consensus Song. Moments like that show me that the people behind this show are HUGE FANS of the books and wanted to make something that's faithful but still provides something new to enjoy.
And there are SOME changes to the story, a lot of them I don't really mind. I like that they made Sally more sassy and Grover more proactive. I like that Medusa's made more as a tragic villain instead of a monstrous one. I REALLY like that we got to see Poseidon early. That last one takes the punch out of the dramatic weight of seeing him in Book Four, but seeing him now really helps cement the idea that this version DOES love Percy and Sally, something that I didn't really get in the books. Which might have been the intention, but the show is trying to be something different, and I respect it for it.
When it comes to the action, it's pretty good. Stuff like the Minotaur fight and the battle with Ares wasn't as long or epic as it was mapped out in my head, but I can understand it. These are big fights involving little kids and CGI is expensive (Even though you wouldn't have this problem if the show was ANIMATED, but I digress). Despite the limitations, the show did will and provided some kickass moments.
As for the actors, frickin' round of applause across the board. Nearly everyone they got does GREAT in their role, fitting the changes the show is going for and the spirit of the book everything is based on. Some particular standouts for me are Adam Copeland as the perfect D-Bag that is Ares and Walter Scobell who IS Percy Jackson. It's the kid especially that impressed me the most, as he nails the sarcastic, angry, endearing, idiotic, and loyal to a fault hero that makes Percy the best. If there's any actor who I think is struggling it's probably Leah Jeffries as Annabeth, who seems a bit too standoffish and closed off, as if she's holding back a lot of personality that the character has. However, to be fair...
A. Annabeth was more or less the same in the first book, so I'll allow it. Just as long as she has more of a wit to match Percy's. It's what made Percabeth amazing.
B. This is a child actor we're talking about. Even Walter, who is PITCH PERFECT casting, manages to have some awkwardness and stiffness to his performance at times too. I'm sure that as more time goes on, these kids will get better and better each season.
And, yeah, I'd say that this is enough to make Percy Jackson and the Olympians a FINE TV show...But there's some things that hold it back from being good or even GREAT.
Firstly, there's the pacing. The pacing in this show is off a lot of the time, and this is mainly a problem with most straight to streaming shows nowadays. We can have long, extensive TV shows anymore as networks and services are demanding shorter and shorter seasons, to the point where its less of a season of television and more of a long movie. It's no different here as we're forced to fly by past plot point after plot point, all while trying to be more episodic AND while setting up future stuff. It makes you appreciate the moments when the show DOES slow down and let moments settle, but there's not enough of that.
Then there's the way moments are told out of order or are condensed. Like how Percy and Annabeth have their heart-to-heart on the train instead of on the animal truck. Or how Annabeth starts calling Percy Seaweed Brain when the journey's almost over instead of doing it right away. Or how Luke sparred with Percy near the END of the season, not the beginning. I'm not exactly an accuracy purist. I find changes are fine as long as the spirit is in tact, which it very much is. And if I wanted the story told exactly as it was, I would have just read the book. But changes like that make me feel like they're missing the point. Like, that zoo truck wasn't great, but it will be a happy memory between Percy and Annabeth as a time when they REALLY talked. Annabeth calling Percy Seaweed Brain was a straight up insult that Percy hated but grew to accept as something only SHE can call him as it later turns into a sort of petname for him. And interrupting Percy's battle with Ares with Percy sparring with Luke spoonfeeds us information, when showing them do that in the beginning would have benefited in making that scene act as a set up with a pay off. Besides, we spend so little time with Luke anyway that when we get to that BIG REVEAL, it's not as impactful because he was barely a character. Again, I don't mind changes, but if you're going to do them, make sure the story doesn't suffer.
But while we're on the topic of changes, let's talk about the ones that REALLY bother me.
I don't like that some other gods are introduced too early. It takes the impact out of Ares and Hades being big, intimidating figures when there are other gods that the characters can just chat and reason with.
I don't like that Annabeth's fear of spiders is just glossed over. Not only does it SHOW US (instead of telling us) that a strong-willed character like Annabeth can be emotionally shaken by something as small as a spider, but leads to a sense of tragedy of her past and her being a child of Athena. To gloss over it is a huge disservice to Annabeth as a character and it doesn't feel right.
And I REALLY don't like that the movie did the Lotus Casino better than the show. Because if the movie that the author loves to shit on managed to be more faithful than the SHOW...it messed up.
So...the show is a mess at times. I still enjoyed it and I hope we get a season two. But if this series wants to get past The Sea of Monsters, it'll need to focus on what makes it GREAT instead of using more of what holds it back as just FINE.
#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson tv show#percy jackson tv spoilers#pjo tv show#annabeth chase#ares pjo#sally jackson#poseidon pjo#quick thoughts#what i thought about
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Some more thoughts on 'Morality Pets Redux'
Link to original post.
ONE still blows me away by how clearly he differentiates between manga and webcomic. There's a tradeoff that he respects: if the webcomic is short, sharp and to the point, then the characters have limitations in how they can interact, try things out, and grow. Conversely, if the manga is long to the point that it can take a long time for it to get to some sort of point, the characters have more scope to find themselves. He treats both versions with respect and if there's no scope for characters to change themselves, then they don't. Which is why we have two great stories to read! :D
There's no point in Tatsumaki changing in the webcomic because there's no one willing to have her in their lives. She's been so toxic that all Fubuki wants is to be left the hell alone, and even Saitama's gone 'eh, I've lost all interest' after she rebuffs his attempts to reach out very rudely. She notes that she ends up driving everyone away, but she's far from actually accepting that she needs to change. Tatsumaki in the manga has positive reasons to change -- she has a sister who wants to get along better with her. Doing so means accepting both her and the people around her, even if it's difficult and there are legitimate challenges. It's a hard pill to swallow but she's trying.
I really appreciate the difference between regretting the consequences of one's actions and being prepared to change one's actions. So human. If feeling bad about our actions was enough to change them, there'd be no anti-addiction or dieting services, counselling would be rare, and prisons would be all but empty.
In both versions, Genos is the guy who wants ultimate destructive power and is willing to even kill himself if it'll take enemies to Hell with him. However, for a guy who is so committed to destruction, it's striking that he's cut to the quick when Sonic taunts him saying that he can't protect anyone.
There's no scope to explore this seeming contradiction in the webcomic. We need to accept that hey, he has places where he won't go and that's fine. The manga has more space, so ONE can dig into the protect vs. destroy issue and have him have to make decisions about what he actually values. The despair that lanced through him when victory slipped through his grasp when fighting Elder Centipede says so much about what matters:
Something @carma-tjol said in their tags really added a lot to my understanding: they pointed to the link between Genos seeing himself as having value and changing his outlook on heroes from assets to people. It added so much salience to Fubuki refusing to run away and risking her life to save him because she didn't abandon her people. She really challenged his outlook.
I like that he's still wrestling with himself after the fact. Had King not come when he did, it'd have been a lose-lose situation: Tatsumaki would be dead anyway and the monsters would be free to rampage over the land and kill millions. He needed to hear Saitama telling him he'd done right to feel a sense of peace. It's very human -- it's hard not to look back even when we see that we've made the right choice.
Come to that, there was something that we'd (okay me and the small sharing circle of mutuals who talk too much about Genos) had been fearing: that Saitama would just note that Genos was broken again, the way he had in the webcomic. Remember this thread? It very nearly came to pass but for King intervening and vouching for Genos so that Saitama had to change the way he saw his disciple. Thank goodness.
If King hadn't been there, because Genos is actively questioning himself, the outcome of Saitama seeming to be dismissive wouldn't have been mere depression. It'd have been total despair. What Genos would have heard is that he's weak and lacked the guts to follow through on his committment to destroy enemies even if it meant killing himself. Talk about a tragic misunderstanding! Blessedly, ONE meters his angst -- it doesn't do to crush all your character's hope in one go.
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