#if ever there’s a more first draft book i have not found it. the amount of times stephanie;s posted abt not being done w the third book yet

[chryzure-archive]

jst saw some of the spin-off trilogy fans come to the realization that the fucking vampire scene holds no reason to it besides vampires. keep that awareness rolling, this entire trilogy is messy writing w only vibes in mind!!

[r3starttt]

Lady of the moon

caitlyn kiramman x reader | read this or DNI

an: I highly suggest you read the request, also, might be part one if this gets enough support bcs this idea has been sooo long on my drafts but it wasn’t until this req that I actually put my mind into it. Pls reblog, comment, whatever, thx mwah

moonlight in a quiet garden, that’s her beauty

Another day of the usual stealing, running and trying not to get caught by pultover citizens as an attempt to survive in the undercity.

You were currently at the roof of what seemed like the fanciest mansion you've ever stepped, luxurious white decorating It's external walls and a deep dark blue on the roof that shined by the almost unbearable sun.

A jump and you were already outside a balcony, desperately trying to open the door as fast as possible at the sight of a nice amount of enforcers at the main entrance. Until desperation kicked in.

Something you've learned is topsiders have nothing to worry about, with that said, their security sucked. So a kick and you were inside what seemed like an office.

There were at least four bookshelfs fulled with books of all kinds of stuff, a huge table in the middle near the biggest window and the door you've came in, it had some sheets with designs, maths and other stuff written you could barely understand.

Aware of the minimum time you had to grab everything and leave and amused by all the stuff you would gain a good reward of, you disposed to sarcastically and slowly grab every peace of whatever artifacts you could find to put It Inside a small bag. Looking trough the books for anything that looked valuable.

That until a weird shimmer cought your eye. Blue and small there was a round crystal directing the shine of the sun to your eye, so you grabbed it.

It wasn't the only one so you didn't think twice and grabbed them all.

Humming, you didn't realize there were footsteps approaching until you heard some keys trying to unlock the door.

You've never get caught, so the panic of it all made you fall, and with it one of the blue orbits you've caught some seconds before broke.

As your hand extended to grab it the door got open, you closed your fingers in the palm of your hand, making of it a tight fist.

"Yeah, I think you should change this door, it's not the first time it blocks itself" That was the most feminine and sophisticated voice you've ever heard, accompanied by the profile of a girl probably your age, with blue dark hair. It reminded you of the crystals you've found. How could someone like her have a place like this for herself you thought, interrupted by a face completely terrified.

"Wait!" She screamed to whoever was accompanying her. You mover your fist to your face, relaxing it as your fingers expressed a silent emotion, warning her to not make any silence.

"What now? You forgot something again?" A male voice was heard, if it's wasn't for that girl you would be dead already, something you knew was men could only mean danger here.

The blue haired girl nodded, rapidly realizing she couldn't be seen so she spoke again "Yeah! I'm so sorry, just... leave the boxes here and I promise I'll help you"

Fancy black shoes stepped inside the office, gently approaching to you as the man probably mid upstairs groaned.

Accompanied by more steps, now going away and the loud sound of boxes hitting the ground right outside the place you just robbed. Your heart beat could be felt all over you'd body.

Why would a topsider panic about you? Why wouldn't she just try to directly kill you as you were told they would if they ever caught you?

"Just go, I won't say anything, I promise" she gently kneeled on the floor, leaving the box she had in hand as quiet as possible.

And of course you didn't believe any of it, but what else could you do besides running away from here?

"Don't come here again, it's dangerous" her voice and words caught you of guard. "Yeah I know that" you responded sarcastically, grabbing the broken crystal from the floor "Your people, they're all crazy"

You could notice a small pout appearing on her face "I'm sorry"

Ignoring her words you turned around, readjusting your bag now heavy on your shoulders, stepping slowly to the outside of the balcony, to leave right like you came in. "Don't be"

You shrugged, giving her a last look. She was the most prettiest girl you've ever seen, and somehow, even not believing any word she said, you could feel her warmth, she wasn't like the others.

And that tought as much as it made your heart feel nice, it also made you worried. Because piltover is made for the cruel and hunger of power, not for the nice and tender like her.

"Take this" her hand had something that looked like a music box, but by the way it looked it was probably the most expensive music box. Yet, it couldn't be so easy right?

You laughed taking it away from her and quickly saving it in your bag "Why for?"

"My dad's money, you won't get in trouble" the way she spoke elicted a smile on your face "thanks uh..." your hands moved, expressing you wanted to know her name

"Caitlyn" "Yeah, thanks caitlyn, hope to see you next time" she was about to laugh until everything went white. A loud pit covered your eyes, blinding you and making you jump out of there.

As you recovered the very small vision you could get you noticed the balcony floor cracking. Did she do this?

Did she do this?

You glanced at her, noticing a blue shine near her. It had been a peace of the stone it fell when she caught you.

Could the others explode? It didn't matter. You had to run away.

The voice of people screaming in fear caught your attention, making you look down at the floor that was starting to fall.

But before you could do anything there was someone waiting ro you already. By the way it screamed caitlyns name it was probably the same man you heard before.

-

"I've heard you were running around piltovers finest?" Silco's voice was hear the moment you stepped inside what was home for you, for him.

"Don't be so mortified, look" as you left the bag fall to the floor you saw his face pointing at the big aquarium. "Beautful aren't they? Yet, up there... at the surfece, no one even know they exist"

His eyes narrowed back at you, opening his arms as he wanted for you to step closer. Once you did he placed his hand on your back, moving it up and down "they're monsters" you shrugged

"There's a monster inside all of us" you nodded, chuckling at the sight of a syringe. Grabbing it nonethelessly and turning your body to properly face him. Injecting it into his eye.

-

The nation of zaun, that’s what you cared most about. You were born there, grew up there, saw your life get slowly destroyed in front of your eyes at the youngest age possible. You learned to forgive, on your own, ironically based on what you’ve seen. What you lived with that blue haired girl named caitlyn you managed to keep in contact after that one time you got caught.

You thought that both sides were doing their bests to have the highest life quality, to keep its people alive and to keep its own spaces existing. You knew you were part of the bad guys, the dangerous and dirty. Even though you weren’t, so, how fair was it to think the same about the other side?

Piltover’s citizens were people like you, afraid of the unknown, with imaginary enemies they were thought to hate since birth. People trying to survive with the peacefullest life possible, with dreams, families, life’s to give a chance experiencing in the best way possible.

So you couldn’t really hate them, because to you, that was ironic, stupid, nonsense.

Oposite to Silco, the man you grew up with, the one that saved your life, the one that was your only family. He thought you to hate them, to be powerful and never fear anyone, never trust people, not even your own, because it was only the two of you in this world.

And you couldn’t blame him either, he suffered what you saw, so you couldn’t really relate to anyone’s pain, specifically not his.

You were the reason this all existed. And how he would let you know, every day, every time. You’re everything that’s behind The nation of Zaun, you found everything that was necessary to create it and make it a possibility. For you it was someone else, a person you omitted while explaining to Silco what had happen and a detail Sevika didn’t know either. For you it was all thanks to caitlyn, who made sure no one searched for you after that, the girl that somehow managed to make people forget everything that happened.

The girl you were currently looking for, most exactly, waiting for since you failed to find her. She genuinely cared about you, and knew the danger of your stance in piltover, so the window of her room would always be open for you.

Laying on her bed you heard steps coming closer and closer outside her room, it could only be her so you waited for her usual entrance where she would catch on her bed the moment she stepped inside, smiling at you an practically running to ramble with you about whatever.

But today wasn’t the case apparently. You noticed the trophy she had in hand, probably her parents did something again and she didn’t like it. “Why so blue kiramman?” she laughed humorlessly “so funny” her eyes rolled as she stepped closer to her bed, you sat on it, waiting for her to come sit next to you.

“I’m a hundred percent sure it was your mom so, please cait, stop being so annoying and stubborn and enjoy your privilege yeah?” she shocked her head, grabbing the trophy in between her legs, making them dance on the air “it was someone else, I… uhm, wanted to tell you something”

You furrowed your brows almost immediately “did you do something? someone did something to you?” your eyes wandered all over her face, trying to read her mind somehow. She didn’t look physically hurt, she couldn’t be but you had to check anyway by how she was acting, you could never know with this people.

Caitlyn extended her trophy to you, confused, you just grabbed it in silence. But it all made sense the moment you read the word enforcer “You’re fucking kidding me? what’s wrong with you caitlyn?”

You leaned your face to make her look back at you “I knew I could never trust you” you groaned in annoyance. It made her look back at you, grabbing your writs and her trophy back, placing it on her bed “don’t say that, you know I have no more options”

“You do, you just want to make things harder for everyone. Just do what your mom says and let her give you a princess life Caitlyn” you swayed her hand away, walking to the window near her bed.

“But you know I don’t want that” her murmur made you so angry for some reason, you always agreed on it, you were the one to support her on not doing what her mom suggested. But she omitted a huge detail, one that you felt like a direct attack to you and what you cared most about, zaunties.

“I don’t want what my family wants either and look at me! I do what Im told and still manage to enjoy parts of it. You’re so privileged… it’s stupid that you’re tying to play the nice humble girl when you’re not, you could never know what it is to be like that”

You weren’t sure of what was more hurtful from this whole situation, but didn’t care either. “Playing the good guy involves me being the bad one, my people being the bad guys, and we’re not, caitlyn”

The tears that were slowly covering her face made you regret saying those words, but god how hurt you felt, how betrayed. Maybe Silco was right and it was only the two of you alone in this whole thing. Or maybe Caitlyn was growing up to become like her people, and so were you. Maybe oil and water can’t get along.

-

“Golden boy…” you whispered at the huge sheet in front of you with the face of the man that was also the reason of everything. Jayce, caitlyn had told you about him. Everyone kept on saying how perfect he was but you were proven more than once topsiders are a bunch of pretty faces trying to play the humble.

Every time you saw that blue uniform you got a feeling in your stomach, nostalgia and disgust. You could only imagine it would at least look good on caitlyn, with her pretty blue hair and her pretty face, because you never believed there was a way she would actually made the job. Only for her convenience of course, like making even harder zaunties life’s, making your life harder, making Silco’s life harder.

Because that’s why you and your people were here for, the blue orbs that would make the difference.

After that fight with Caitlyn you stopped coming back in a while, fearing she could find you and you could attack her, fearing she could attack you and you would have to let her hurt you, fearing you could get her in troubles or she could get you in troubles. Yet here you are, doing it all for Silco.

Well, you weren’t supposed to be here exactly, but jinx insisted on letting her do the hard job. Sevika was there too so she would manage all, or so she insisted always, no matter what you or jinx or anyone else did she could always do better, so you were taking advantage of it to get what you wanted all at once.

Proving nor sevika or jinx could do this as you could, and taking a peek of caitlyn who had to be somewhere. Her family would do anything to keep her from seeing real world but as any other citizen in here, they had to play the humble and caring people so there was no way she wasn’t working on a day like this. Progress day, being also close with that golden boy she had to be at least standing somewhere looking pretty and pretending to work.

To your surprise there she was, right in front of you, some meters apart. She was standing in front of a tent until she turned around. Due the position you were in you couldn’t see who she was talked to, but she looked entertained. Until she didn’t, you lost her out of sight.

-

“Caitlyn kiramman, why does that don’t surprise me?” you chuckled at the sight of amused eyes of a man that worked with you, covered by her, trying to make him speak with her usual sweetness, the same way she did with you. You had a gun pointed at him, ordering him to keep quiet as you kneeled near them.

She turned around, her face showed a mix of confusion but warmth, like the first time you ever saw her. You moved the gun closer to the man, signaling to leave, which he did immediately.

“If you care so much about the undercity why not ask your old friend mhm?” You saved the gun, extending your hand to help her stand again, which she ignored, eliciting a laugh from you “You did this?” her voice, it caused the same feeling that uniform, and her face, and this place. It made you feel dizzy in some sort of way.

You nodded “why, you’re gonna take me to prison or something?” Caitlyn rolled her eyes, crossing her arms as she stepped back. “You haven’t changed” “Yeah?” you mocked.

Next to her on the ground you noticed some pictures, you just glanced at them, knowing she would pick them up the moment she noticed you looking at them.

“That’s not me, the mask” she narrowed her eyes at you, doing exactly as you’ve expected “He said something about a man, you work for someone now?” she seemed surprised

You shrugged “I always did” her mouth opened yet before she said anything you spoke again “I thought you didn’t do your job, you looked better standing and just looking pretty outside your mom’s tent”

“You were watching me?” her eyes studied your figure, furrowing her brows “it was her tent then? I guessed that” her hand traveled to the side of your arm, giving it a gentle snap, which made you jump back “What was that?”

“You disappear for years and now this?” now you were the one rolling the eyes “I thought something had happened to you”

You watches the scene in our silence, she looked genuinely worried, intrigued by this whole situation. It made you realize how normal you were about all this, how you’ve created a whole reality of her person now, and how inaccurate that might be.

But then you remembered why you left her on the first place, the words Silco said to you.

“So you agree your people’s dangerous?” you let out a sigh, turning around and watching all the mess your crew had done “enforcers are dangerous” you murmured, hearing her steps roaming somewhere behind you.

“I’m not, I’m here because I know something’s been wrong and I want to help the undercity” you shifter your gaze back to her “Why?” “For you”

[the-winter-spider]

Kinda Don’t | B.Barnes

Warnings: Angst, character death

Word count: 3.5k

A/N: Never proof read, going through my drafts and just posting shit lol, enjoy?

Master list

****

Bucky and you had a long history, and I don't mean long as in only a decade but 7 of them.

You were the girl next door literally, you grew up directly next door to Bucky. You moved in right before puberty hit not just the boys but you too.

It was always just you three and it was the first time you had any real friends, your father was part of the army, science sector of it so you were constantly moving never having enough time to actually make any life long friends let alone fall in love but when he went missing, later discovered dead in some secret lab he had under your house, your mother and you packed up and moved to the city that everyone wanted to live in, New York.

With the endless amount of possibilities or more so the endless amount of men your Mother could shack up with and have them support her and yourself. You didn't mind of course as long as she was happy, you were happy.

That was until her latest husband David started yelling a lot, then he started drinking a lot, then he hit you for the first time. Your mother told you it was the wrong place at the wrong time, you walked into the house right as they were fighting and he struck you. You never said anything except went straight to your room, then climbed out your window back to where Bucky was.

And when he saw you, you broke down. He promised he’d always be here for you and you were the only girl that would ever have his heart. He was true to his word to a certain extent. That was until puberty hit and every girl was throwing themselves at him, it was inevitable he was gorgeous.

He went out with every girl in town, except for you because you weren't as pretty as them even though he always would get drunk and end up climbing through your window instead of his, telling you just how you were the most beautiful girl he’d ever laid eyes on how he was so lucky to have you, but then the next day when you woke up he was gone, back out the window and back to holding some other dame in his arms.

But when the war got worse and people were getting their letters left and right you knew Bucky’s were coming and he stopped seeing other girls and he spent all his time with Steve and you.

It was different, he would hold your hand on the street, he would take you dancing, he would take you on dates. You found yourselves constantly under the sheets intertwined with one another and then one night when he thought you were sleeping he told you while running his fingers through your hair that it was only ever going to be you, it was only ever you and when he saw any future it was always with you.

He told you he was hopeless in love with you since the day he saw you standing by the moving truck holding a box and you tried your hardest not to open your eyes and tell him you were in love with him too.

The next day he enlisted and spent the last night he had with Steve and you at some Stark thing you cared nothing about but at the same time everything about because Bucky cared about it and you cared about Bucky.

And just like that he was gone and the first decade and a half of your history had ended before it ever really started. When Steve showed up on your step to tell you about Bucky and to give you the book that Bucky wrote to you every single day, he told you he was going to avenge his death and he would come back to you, and then he never did either. When Peggy Carter knocked on your door to tell you about Steve you shut the door and shut anyone out that was left in your life.

Till sometime in the 50’s in the paper it said Howard Stark was looking for volunteers and you never forgot how much Bucky would beam at the opportunity so you showed up at the base and he said yes before you could even speak after hearing how you were Steve’s best friend.

You were injected with the closest hope to the next super soldier serum without the drastic physical changes. They called you Miss America, and you hoped you would have made your boys proud but when Howard noticed you weren’t ageing as you should they ran tests, discovering that your cells rengernated at an extremely fast rate now allowing you to age as you should before you could run more tests and possibly find an antidote or even how enchanced you really were, Howard died.

You were alone again, Peggy tried her best to keep you company and to keep you hidden, you should have been in your late 60’s like her but instead you looked 3 decades younger than her, she thought it would be best to fake your death so that's what you did.

Y/N Y/L/N died in 1995 at the age of 75, your cause of death was undetermined. That’s when Lily Barnes was created, born in 1965 making you 30 years old, which is what you would stay looking for the next 2 decades, when they found Steve on ice you could have sworn you saw a wrinkle that was never there before.

When he found out Peggy was alive he was of course over the moon but when he saw you he couldn’t believe his eyes. He had Fury look into you and when he saw a death certificate, they found where you were buried and it was beside Bucky. But yet you were standing directly in front of him looking like you had only aged 5 years in the last 70. You told him everything, he was so mad at first but he came to terms with it when he realised he wasn’t going to be alone.

Fury tried to recruit you for the avengers but you wanted nothing to do with making new friends and losing them your heart simply couldn't handle it. Fury understood told you he didn't like it but he understood, he put you in a safe house Steve respected your wishes and besides Fury, Steve was the only one who knew where you were that until a red head knocked on your door, Steve beside her and he told you to suit up, you did no questions asked.

The next thing you knew you were on a jet, getting debriefed about someone by the name of Thano’s. But when you were getting close to a place called Wakanada, your heightened sense picked up on something you.

–

“Steve, what's wrong?” You stood by Natasha putting all your weapons in their correct spot.

“What isn’t wrong?” Natasha tried to joke but you ignored it.

“Stevie” You asked again “You know I can tell right? I can sense literally everything”

He gave you a soft smile “I forgot you were enhanced” he sighed “There’s something i haven't told you”

“No shit” You smiled

“She doesn’t know?” Sam asked from the front seat, Steve shook his head in response.

“How much doesn’t she know?” Natasha whispered

“None of it”

Natasha looked at you, placing a hand on your shoulder “I’m sorry in advance, I didn’t know” she then proceeded to sit by Sam, giving Steve and you the space you apparently needed for this conversation.

“I’m so sorry, i just, there was so much going on and you wanted to stay out of it and i know if you knew you would have been brought back in, but then Natasha happened and i didnt know about their history and he was so happy, I haven't seen him smile like that since you, then Wakanda happened, he deserved to be free, he deserves to be happy and so do you and it was wrong of me not to say anything, your my best friend you took care of Peggy, I – “

“Steve, slow down, what are you talking about?” Your senses were in overload, you could feel every atom, every fibre in the air, alerting you that you needed to run, that you needed to fight.

He gave you the same eye’s he gave you when your Ma past, the same eyes he gave you when Bucky forgot about your birthday because Dot said yes to a date, the same eyes he gave you when he told you Bucky died. “He’s alive, Bucky’s alive”

“What? Steve that's not funny”

“I know, I’m not joking” He reached just beside the shield and handed you a file that said CLASSIFIED in big red letters “Were arriving in an hour, I’m sorry I should have told you sooner, everything you need to know is in here. I’ll be right over there if you need me, I’m here for you”

The file was heavy in your hands, your mouth was dry. When you read his name at the top it felt you were swallowing a razor blade. You read everything as fast as you could, you held back tears, letting the metaphorically razor blade cut any emotions you wanted to have. You were angry, so angry, so hurt that this was kept from you, you wanted to kill Steve Rogers, you wanted to murder Captain America. But no more than you wanted to kill yourself, he was alive this whole time, the same time you were alive. You could have done something, why didn’t you know to do something? You should have felt he was still alive and in pain, he was your soulmate, he said you were soulmates. That was until you got to the second last page in the file, it was an HR paper from Stark Industries and your eyes were blurring with tears when you saw the world's relationship and saw two signatures at the bottom one reading James Barnes and the other Natasha Romanoff.

“Landing in 5, 4, 3 – “ You heard Sam counting down, you placed the file down. You took a deep breath soaking in every fibre of information presented to you in the last hour. You stood up having an internal battle of whether you should kill Steve now or later, you wanted to strangle Natasha, but it wasn’t her fault, you couldn't blame Bucky, she was amazing if you swung that way you would have fallen for her too, you should have known the second Steve told you he was alive, before you even opened the file, he always had a thing for redheads. You clipped your last knife to your thigh.

You gave Natasha a small smile and she returned it. You could feel Steve’s presence hovering beside you, as the doors whired open “Does he know?” you didn’t even look at Steve as the doors slowly opened.

“No” He sighed “Im so sore –”

You shook your head “Don't”

Natasha was the first one out, no doubt in your mind wanting to see Bucky, Steve followed shortly after, then Sam, then Bruce, the Rhodey, than you’

Her arms wrapped around his neck, her lips grazed his you heard her mumble an ‘i miss you’, that metaphorical razor you swallowed sliced your heart in half.

Steve hugged Bucky, whispering something to him and his blue eyes searched for you, disbelief written all over his face. He started to make his way to you, but stopped just before he could reach you, his eyes trailed over your figure, tears brimmed his eyes “Doll, I -”

You cleared your throat, shifting your demeanour from heart broken and love sick back to someone you swore you never wanted to be again and that was Miss America “We have a fight to win Sargent.”

He blinked a few times, shifting his gaze to Steve and he shrugged in return, he turned back to you “But I - “

Steve came up beside him “She’s right Buck”

Bucky looked like he was having an internal battle within himself before he nodded and the team made their way to the battle ground, Bucky never leaving your side, his pace stayed with you the whole time until the fight started, he kissed Natasha on the cheek wishing her good luck, before he got the chance to say something to you, your back was already turned getting in your fight stance.

You lost him for a while during the battle, while still keeping an eye on him without being too obvious. You did the same with Steve you knew he was more than capable and was no longer that little boy from brooklyn, even though you were still mad at him he was still your best friend, well one of them.

The fight dragged on, and when you thought you had any possible chance of winning, people started turning to dust all around you “no no no” you mumbled running closer to Steve, your eyes locked with Bucky “Y/n….” he trailed off before he was completely gone.

—

F i v e whole years.

Five whole years of losing Bucky again, five years of growing so close to Natasha you would consider her your best friend. It was just you two in the compound, you came back to the whole superhero lifestyle and tried your best to do anything you could to keep things running smoothly. It was hard half the fucking world was missing, but your whole world was.

You wanted to hate Natasha you did, she had everything you ever wanted in the palm of her hands and yet you couldn’t. She was everything you aspired to be. You were nothing like her and it made sense why Bucky kept anything you thought you had in the dark, it wasn't because you thought he was savouring it, soaking up every moment, no it was because he was ashamed.

You wanted nothing more than to hate her, it would have made things so much easier but she was just as amazing as everyone made her out to be, you hoped you could somehow find a way to get Bucky back and selfishly you hoped he would wildy confess his undenying love to you but you knew that would never happen, and at the same time you were rooting for them, he was your everything then and she was your everything now.

You could push your heart break aside for decades again couldn't you?

Could you die from a broken heart? You hoped it would make everything so much easier.

But you didn't and here you were about to do fucking time travel. Standing on the platform you tried to tune out all the energy and nerves you could feel radiating off of everyone, a hand found its way on your shoulder “Were gonna get him back Natasha smiled at you before turning to the rest of your teammates, her family “See you in a minute”

—

“You know, i thought living as long as i have would have been the craziest thing to ever happen to me” You smiled thinking of all the crazy shit you experienced in your overly lived lifetime.

“But here we are, in space going to some place called Vormir, don’t be too full of yourself y/n'' You laughed, bumping your shoulder against hers.

“Welcome” A voice echoed behind you. Grabbing your knife, Natasha reached for her gun. “Natasha, daughter of Ivan. Y/n, daughter of Lilith.

As you both made your way forward you tensed immediately recognizing who is in front of you.

“Who are you?” Natasha questioned, your knives still raised.

“Consider me a guide, to you and to all who seek the Soul Stone”

You eyed her cautiously before taking a step forward “Oh good, you tell us where it is, then we’ll be on our way”

Red skull looked at you “If only it were that easy”

He turned around starting to move forward, you looked at Natasha, she shrugged in response and then the two of you followed him near the edge of a cliff, what looked to be a sunset in the distance.

“What you seek lies in front of you, as does what you fear”

Natsha pushed ahead peering over the edge “The stones down there” Her back to you.

“For one of you” Red skull respond

You were overwhelmed, you could feel the stone, you could feel the calmness, the sureness radating off of Natasha, her pure willingness. Your feet dragged you forward, peaking over hoping the stone would be in reach, which you knew it wouldn't be, because it would be crazy for something to be that easy.

“For the other” He continued “You must lose that which you love, an everlasting exchange” He paused dramatically, you swallowed the lump in your throat “A soul for a soul”

She took your hand in hers, pulling you away from the ledge. Taking a seat on a rock, while you leaned on one. You knew what you had to do, what had to be done “Y’know, I think our hopefully chatter doomed us”

She smiled at you “We cant seem to ever catch a break huh?”

“People like us never really do it seems”

She stood up turning to face you “And here i thought we found a little bit of break in each other the last 5 years”

You smiled back at her “It's always too good to be true”

“Whatever it takes” She took your hand in hers

Swallowing back the lump in your throat “Whatever it takes”

She stared in your eyes, you felt nothing but love and longing radiating off of her “If we don't get that stone y/n, millions of people stay dead, Barnes stays dead”

Nodding in agreement “He deserves a life Nat” You placed your other hand on hers “A great one and you —“

“I'm starting to think we mean different people here y/n”

“For the last five years Nat, all we've been trying to do is get to right here, that's all its been about. Bringing every body back, getting Bucky back”

“Don't you get all sappy on me now y/n/n”

“Nat..” you trailed off

“You think I want to do this? I'm trying to save your life you idiot”

You squeezed her hand “Yeah, well I don't want you to. I've lived long enough Nat, this would be a great way to go” You smiled back your tears “Bucky has you, i have you” you looked off towards the sunset “It's not that bad of a sight, y’know if its the last thing i see”

She placed her free hand on your cheek, turning your head to face her again “I love Bucky” her eyes piercing into yours “But i love you more”

“No, Nat -“

I wasn't finished” Her thumb swept one out of a dozen fallen tears finding their way down your cheek “But he could never love me, his heart belonged to someone else but the little piece of it i got to see”

You shook your head as she brought your forehead to hers before she continued “Whatever it takes”

“Okay, you win” You released her hand before sweeping your leg under hers, placing your arm across her chest and pinning her down “Tell Bucky and Steve i love them”

She grunted before hitting your arm, and using her legs to flip you around before standing up and pointing her widow bite at you “You tell em’ yourself” before shooting it at you, an electrical charge attacked your body.

She started to run towards the edge before you recovered, grabbing your knife and aiming it at her leg grazing the side enough to knock her down.

Before you started to charge at full speed to the edge, as you were about to fall, she wrapped her arms around you shooting your grappling hook at the top of the cliff, you both swung back at full force smashing into the edge, you looked up “No no no” you tighten your grip on her but you could feel her slipping “How do you know i love you! This could be for nothing you dont know”

“I know”

You tried to reach her with your other hand for a better grip but failed

“Let me go”

“No” you sobbed “No please no”

“Its okay” she smiled

“Please” Tears were burning down your face, before she kicked off the wall her arm ripped from your grip.

“No!” You screamed till your throat was raw, as you looked down you saw her lifeless body laying there.

Everything went black and you could hear water running, you sat up frantically, you were no longer hanging off the cliff, as you lifted your hand out of the water a single stone laid in it. Your tears meshed with the water before you were being brought back.

“Did we get 'em all?”

“Are you telling me this actually worked?”

You dropped to the ground, cheeks raw from crying, you could feel all eyes on you, “Y/n? Where's Nat?” Bruce questioned, you turned to look at Steve, shaking your head no, avoiding all the other eyes because you wouldn't dare look into their eyes, you were nothing to them.

She was their family and you came back and she didn't.

[anim-ttrpgs]

Some History of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy

Brandon and I have played a lot of TTRPGs, from nearly every edition of Dungeons & Dragons to half-finished playtests of things you’ve never heard of. Our history with TTRPGs is a love story, but one pockmarked with frustration. We found ourselves enjoying D&D 3.5’s vast character creation options, but wishing it focused more on  grounded characters and historically informed combat; being drawn in by Call of Cthulhu’s horror and existential dread, but disappointed in its investigation mechanics for actually getting the investigators to those moments of horrifying revelation; being intrigued by Monster of the Week’s juxtaposition of both normal and supernatural PCs (for horror and/or comedy), but finding its lack of character options and reliance on genre tropes a hindrance; being unable to find anything that would be good for a S.T.A.L.K.E.R. inspired TTRPG campaign. We eventually found the OSR movement and AD&D1e and 2e to be far closer to what we wanted on the medieval fantasy front, but we still had nothing on the modern horror or urban fantasy front, and Shadowrun is… Shadowrun.

So, with around 20 years of TTRPG experience between us, we set out to make the game we wanted a reality.

The story of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy’s creation really starts in late 2021, when Brandon asked me to help playtest a very early rough draft of an investigative horror game he thought up. Living isolated, impoverished, and unable to find work in England at the time, I readily agreed. Noticing that the game didn’t have a combat system and desperate to set my mind to something constructive in between tedious job applications, I offered to write a combat system for it. I soon had to use the last of my money to move back home to Louisiana where I eventually did find work despite a variety of health issues, and continued to work on Eureka as a system for our personal use.

As 2023 drew near, it became clear that my current job wasn’t going to be a permanent career, and I needed a fall back plan. Work towards making Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy a professional release began in earnest, with Brandon and I founding A.N.I.M. a few months later. It was initially set to go to Kickstarter in April of 2023, then May, then June, but each time we realized it just wasn’t ready. No one had ever heard of us, and we wanted to break into an industry and customer base increasingly financially hostile to any TTRPG that wasn’t D&D5e compatible. We needed to build an audience, and build a greater appreciation for independent and small-budget TTRPGs within the community at large.

Thanks to some assistance from one of the team members from Tuesday Knight Games (makers of Motherhship), the first beta copies went public in September of 2023 to a splash of instant (relative) success, and the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club was founded on Discord two months later, a community dedicated to buying, playing, and analyzing less well-known TTRPGs - which includes almost everything except Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition.

Ash became friends with us through the book club, and after offering an increasing amount of assistance, joined the team proper in January of 2024, adding much needed copy-editing skills as well as another 15 years cumulative TTRPG experience.

The Kickstarter campaign for Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy launched on April 10th, 2024, was fully funded within 3 hours, and by the end of the campaign had reached a total of $15,455, 486% of the goal. That is where we are at now, working every day to put the finishing touches on the game and complete the stretch goals to the best of our ability before our tentative deadline of January 2025.

This is a far more ambitious project than a super-small team like ours should have attempted for our debut game, but with a mix of talent, luck, skill, and a whole lot of help, we have somehow managed to pull it off. We think the resulting game is a deep, robust, professional-quality TTRPG that provides a one-stop shop and extensive toolbox for any investigative or mystery game you’d like to run. A dark and moody noir, a classical British whodunnit, the lighthearted sleuthing hijinks of Scooby-Doo, Eureka does it all.  (You can also get the latest PDF for FREE for a limited time by joining the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club!)

Elegantly designed and thoroughly playtested, Eureka represents the culmination of three years of near-daily work from our team, as well as a lot of our own money. If you’re just now reading this and learning about Eureka for the first time, you missed the crowdfunding window unfortunately, but our Kickstarter page is still the best place to learn more about what Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy actually is, as that is where we have all the fancy art assets, the animated trailer, links to video reviews by podcasts and youtubers, and where we post regular updates on the status of our progress finishing the game and getting it ready for final release.

Beta Copies through the Patreon

If you want more than just status updates, going forward you can download regularly updated playable beta versions of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy and it’s adventure modules by subscribing to our Patreon at the $5 tier or higher. Subscribing to our patreon also grants you access to our patreon discord server where you can talk to us directly and offer valuable feedback on our progress and projects.

The A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club

If you would like to meet the A.N.I.M. team and even have a chance to play Eureka with us, you can join the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club discord server. It’s also just a great place to talk and discuss TTRPGs, so there is no schedule obligation, but the main purpose of it is to nominate, vote on, then read, discuss, and play different indie TTRPGs. We put playgroups together based on scheduling compatibility, so it’s all extremely flexible. This is a free discord server, separate from our patreon exclusive one. https://discord.gg/7jdP8FBPes

Other Stuff

We also have a ko-fi and merchandise if you just wanna give us more money for any reason.

[charliedawn]

Morpheus x Reader

Synopsis : You are planning on asking Dream to marry you and rehearsing all the best ways to do it—only for Dream to hear you. Enjoy.

"...Dream of the Endless. No. Too formal. Hum..", you mumbled to yourself while walking up and down the corridor. You tried to find the right way to address the Dream Lord who you were about to ask a very important question to, but it was hard. Nobody knew how to talk to Dream. And even after all those years beside him—it was impossible for you to find the right way.

"..Dream ? Yeah. No. Maybe...Morpheus ? What would he prefer ? Does he even have a preference ?!" You even had trouble finding the right title. To you, he had always been Dream. But, to everyone else ? He was the King of a realm you couldn't even begin to grasp the immensity of. He was powerful. Powerful enough to move mountains and shape the minds of billions of people..He wasn't simple. And, maybe was it the reason he had chosen you ? You were simple. Your mind was an open book to him. He knew its every nook and crevice. Because everything that made you special or anything out of the ordinary came from your dreams.

You kept to yourself and didn't dare meet the gaze of any of the creatures roaming the castle and busy with their daily tasks. You had a task of your own to apply yourself to, but whenever you would try to find the right words—those two gorgeous ocean eyes would come haunt you and freeze all coherent thinking out of your head. How did one propose to the Lord of the Dreaming ? Master of Nightmares and Dreams ?

How did one propose to Morpheus ?

It was a difficult task, and even though you wanted nothing more than to rush to the library and ask Lucienne for help, you knew you had to do this on your own. Morpheus was ethereal—beautifully so. He had a castle. Subjects. Magic..He didn't technically need you—but he had still chosen you to remain by his side. So long had past since your first meeting with the Dream Lord—and yet—you still had trouble talking casually with him. You were at a loss for words every time he graced you with his presence.

But, you had to do it. You had never been so sure of anything in your life. Today was the day.

"Morpheus. Dream of the Endless. Would you..I mean..If you'd do me the honor of accepting to..?..No ! Not like that !", you yelled out of frustration and earned yourself a couple of confused and concerned stares from the different people surrounding you.

You suddenly felt very embarrassed and decided to find shelter in a more secluded place to continue your internal debate. You then took the direction of your bedroom for some peace and quiet—knowing Morpheus wouldn't return from his trip to his sister's realm for another day or two. It left you just enough time to be prepared and find the perfect words.

You took a big breath and couldn't help but pick at the beds of your fingernails while pondering on the final draft—the final question that would get past your lips in his presence. You wanted it to be perfect—just as perfect as him..

"Could you marry me, please..?", you asked with just the right amount of desperation to show your terrible fear of rejection. You were on the verge of tears and pictured Morpheus actually saying no. The walls would shake. His unforgiving eyes would glare dagger at you. His red lips would turn into a dark scowl. You wanted him. So badly. But truth was, you had noticed how he had seemed so distant from you the past few months..You were scared he might have grown bored of you—or worse, found someone else.

You didn't even hear yourself utter out loud—your voice a mere whisper as you tried not to think of all the hurtful things he could do to you..He was the only being in the universe you had ever really felt at home with. You loved him, and it was high time he knew just how much.

He would hear your feelings.

Even if it was your last day in the Dreaming.

"Morpheus. Dream of the Endless. Love of my life. Would you marry me ?", you finally settled for those words with your eyes closed and imagined Morpheus standing there—an indescribable expression on his face. But, after some time, a small smile crept on his face and he parted his pretty lips to utter one word.

"Yes."

Your eyes snapped open, as that yes was far too real to just be a fruit of your wild imagination. You turned around swiftly and your eyes widened at the sight of the object of all your desires and affection standing before you. You hadn't even heard him come in !

"You...should have knocked.", you stated—too stunned by his mere presence to say anything else. You just couldn't believe he was here. You hoped it wasn't some cruel joke of one of the Nightmares..You stayed frozen for a while and neither you or Morpheus seemed to know what to say next. Finally, Morpheus decided to end your suffering and break the agonizing silence.

"My apologies. Should I re-enter then ?", he asked and turned slightly to the door—showing he had every intention to do just that. But, you quickly shook your head and grabbed his hand.

"No. No ! I just...Really ?" You uttered that last word in such disbelief—it brought amusement in Morpheus' eyes. However, he remained silent and it took a moment or two for him to speak again.

"Why yes..I would get out and re-enter again—with knocking this time—if you'd wish ?"

You let out a small huff before shaking your head again. He was doing it on purpose. He wanted you to say it. You indulged.

"No. Not that. The other thing. You..You really want to marry me ?"

A heavy silence settled between the both of you at your question and Morpheus seemed to ponder for a second or so—probably to taunt you.

"May I give you my answer now ?", he finally asked and you nodded.

"S..Sure. Please. One more time."

He smiled tenderly at your endearing overwhelmed expression and took a step forward.

"I..."

He took another step.

"...do."

You burst into tears of joy and tried to wipe them away unsuccessfully. You then wrapped your arms around his shoulders and peppered his face with kisses—ignoring the way he groaned in fake annoyance under the attack.

"I love you. So much.", you laughed and even though tears strained your cheeks, you had never felt happier in your life as Morpheus chuckled—his chest rumbling from the action as you pressed yourself closer against him.

"...I would certainly hope so.", he playfully replied and you didn't answer. You were in another land—another universe..You had reached the summum of bliss and refused to return to the land of the simple living.

But then, a thought came to your mind as you asked.

"Say..Why did you come back so early from your trip ?"

Morpheus hummed softly to himself before finally confessing.

"I..was actually asking for my sister's advice on how to propose to you. She wasn't exactly clear. She said to 'follow my heart'. And somehow ? It led me back directly to you.."

Well—If that wasn't romantic, and an excellent way to tease Morpheus for centuries to come..Morpheus then reached for something in his pocket and when you saw the ring in his hand—you suddenly ran out of breath. It was beautiful. It was all so.. Morpheus. The dark ring was made out of black matter and you could see little dark purple stones floating around it. You laughed to yourself and Morpheus gave you a quizzical look.

"...Are you alright ?", he asked—a little worried at your euphoria, even though overjoyed himself. You then took out the ring you had chosen for him—with the same exact pattern and the corners of his lips curved up slightly.

"...Great minds think alike.", you mused and Morpheus tilted his head to kiss your forehead tenderly.

"You have the most wonderful mind I have ever seen..", he admitted and you chuckled. To think you had worried about him growing bored of you...You should have known Morpheus would never do that to you—because he had fallen in love with your mind before you had even physically met.

"Likewise, dear Dream of mine.", you mused and Morpheus smiled. He leaned forward for a kiss, but you shook your head and pulled away from his embrace.

"You still haven't answered my question. Do you really wish to spend the rest of your days with little old me ?", you taunted and Morpheus restrained an eye roll, as if the answer wasn't obvious..

"...Yes."

The moment he finally said it, you grinned widely and wrapped your arms around his neck and finally kissed him, making sure to make a mess of his already dark curls running wild.

"...I love you..", you whispered in his ear and Dream smiled before nuzzling your cheek and you could have sworn hearing him purr appreciatively.

"Me too, my little dreamer. Now, and always."

You laughed and tried not to sound too dejected at the thought of eternity. You weren't eternal. Your love would last long after your disappearance however, but you hoped his would last as long.

"Always is a long time..", you playfully reminded him—but Morpheus remained dead serious as he replied sternly.

"There is another reason I came to my sister."

You peered up at him with a quizzical expression and Dream smiled fondly down at you, his fingers tracing the side of your face tenderly.

"My love...How would you like to be immortal ?", he asked and your eyes widened significantly.

"Wait...Like Hob ?"

Morpheus smiled and nodded.

"Yes. I managed to reach an agreement with my sister to extend your life expectancy..indefinitely."

You felt tears in your eyes and your heart swelled with love for the being that was willing to argue with Death on your behalf. You stood up on your tiptoes and kissed his lips.

"...Dream of the Endless. I do not deserve such gift, but if it means spending more time with you ? Then, call me selfish. For I will accept this gift with open arms."

You felt Morpheus' smile against your lips and he held you a little closer. He would never call you that, for it would admit his own selfishness.

And Dream didn't like to admit his weaknesses.

He wasn't about to lose you to his sister, and he would make a deal with Lucifer themselves to keep you by his side.

"....So, did you ask Hob to be your witness already ?"

Morpheus let out a low growl from within his chest, one that you recognized as a reluctant admission and you chuckled knowingly. Figures.

You wondered if Lucienne was available ?

[space-writes]

hello (again) writeblr! i decided to make a new intro that has all my current wips on it, since i have way more than when i first started out on here.

about me

I go by Space, my pronouns are they/he, and I’m in my third decade of existence, which is absolutely wild. I’ve been writing for most of it, so I like to think I’m pretty decent

I write mostly fantasy and erotica (sometimes at the same time), both original and fanfiction, and all of it's queer

You can find my work on my AO3 here, crossposted to my neocities here, and under my snippets tag

I’m open to tag and ask games, and my inbox is currently open to anything as well. I don’t always reply the fastest, but I’ll get to it eventually! (I don’t take part in chain asks, so please don’t send me them)

I use obsidian.md for all my writing, and it’s my favourite notes app ever, so I also talk about that occasionally. The tag for it is here, and I’m hoping to write some more showcases/tutorials this year!

my main goal is to actually finish some damn books and also to inflict my OC brainrot upon people. so far the second one is the only thing that’s actually happened, but i live in hope

My current wips are Chronicles of Valloroth (Renegade Prince being book one), Obedience, Obsession, and claws—summaries and links for all four are under the cut!

this is my writing sideblog, you can find my main @thespacelizard, and i follow/like from there

tag directory is here

current wips

Chronicles of Valloroth

⚔ Genre: Fantasy Adventure

⚔ Features: Queer cast, found family, A Whole Entire Dragon, magical mishaps, The Mere Concept of Doing The Right Thing, a grumpy assassin, a sparkly mercenary, knock-off tieflings, a handsome prince (he’s gay), more banter than your average dungeons and dragons campaign

⚔ Status: Book One: First draft completed, re-drafting in-progress || Books Two & Three: outlined

⚔ One Sentence Summary (Book One): A runaway prince seeks freedom in a new world and must find a way to convince a rag-tag group to defeat an ancient dragon, all whilst he is being hunted by a band of mercenaries and an infamous assassin.

⚔ Series Tag: valloroth blogging

claws

🩸 Genre: Queer Horror

🩸 Features: teacher/student relationship (university edition), toxic romance, gender fuckery, broken identity, demonology, murder, self-harm, obsession, stalking, infidelity, a lot of blood, pact-based magic system, corruption, jealousy, eldritch entities, love is a wound, body horror, attempted suicide, and a little bit of arachnophilia

🩸 Status: First draft complete!

🩸 One Sentence Summary: A young student’s obsession with his demonology teacher sparks a twisted romance that draws him to the limits of his humanity—and into the web of an eldritch horror.

🩸 Series Tag: wip: claws

Obedience

💜 Genre: Erotic Romance, D&D fanfiction (original characters, Forgotten Realms setting & loose 5E ruleset)

💜 Features: a variety of BDSM scenarios, one closed off wizard dom, one enthusiastic nerdy sub, weird uses for dnd spells, a painful amount of pining, somehow; worldbuilding, emotional slow burn, as much self indulgence as I can possibly fit in a fanfic series

💜 Status: Arcs 1-3 are complete (read on AO3 here, or my neocities here). The first book of Arc 4, The Perils of Wanting is currently being posted bi-monthly here. The second book of Arc 4, A Question of Trust, is on its second draft.

💜 One Sentence Summary: A D/s M/M series featuring two wizard boys, the kinky magic they get up to, and the feelings they definitely don’t have for each other.

💜 Series Tag: obedience fic blogging (it began on my main, so the tag there has more snippets)

Obsession

🕷 Genre: War of the Spider Queen/Forgotten Realms fanfiction, also Erotica, Horror and a smidge of Dark Romance

🕷 Features: OC/canon, a nightmare transmasc wizard boy, obsession, stalking, jealousy, violent impulses, dubious consent, possessiveness, evil gender dysphoria, incest, gore, the inherent horror of Having a Body, and occasionally actual school things happening at Sorcere

🕷 Status: Ongoing serial, which you can read on AO3 here, or my neocities here

🕷 One Sentence Summary: Pharaun Mizzrym is everything to Vizaeth Thaezyr. He’ll do anything for him—even if Pharaun doesn’t know it yet.

🕷 Series Tag: obsession fic blogging (it also began on my main, so check the tag there for additional content!)

[futurewriter2000]

Nothing but stares and glances - pt. 1

A/N: So I had this in my drafts for a while and to be honest, I wanted to get it over with but I felt like it was better for me to do another part but from Fred's perspective. I think it's a good way to finish it.

REQUEST: Hello. I had a story idea and would love to have it written by you (with Fred Weasley or Sirius Black). The reader is a quiet, shy Ravenclaw who always laughs at his jokes (she's just his classmate). She doesn't understand why he flirts with all the girls and pays attention to everyone except her. What she doesn't know is that he does it because she's the only one he really likes and the prettiest of them all.

xx

Something about Hogwarts always felt so peaceful- whether you came from a loud city, small town or a lovely village, Hogwarts always felt like home. When you were somewhere alone; in your room, by the lake, sitting by the stairs or the library- it felt peaaceful.

Though there were some people that brought terror to some of the First Years or any student any age, there were also the ones that brought enormous amount of fun and life. And one specifically made your lips go from ear to ear almost every day.

"Shall I walk you to your dorm later on Miss Johnson?" he said to the girl who walked by his side as they both entered the classroom.

Your eyes immediately met his, only for a moment and that moment felt like eternity until interrupted by a large amount of brown hair.

"I think I can walk by myself to my dorm, Mr. Weasley and you know what happens if a boy steps a foot to our dormitory." she gave him a cheeky smile and sat down.

"Fun happens." he grinned widely, his eyes not looking once at yours, only hers. "And more fun if you'd let me walk you to your dorm." he winked at her before making his way to his seat, which was a row to right behind you.

Eyes meet, smiles appear but only before he disappears behind you.

"You're really red, you know?" your friend leaned to whisper in your ear.

"Well, it is a bit too warm here and these uniforms are really tight." you replied with a smile but she only giggled.

"Mhm, mrs. Weasley." she said very quietly but you only bumped her with your elbow as you both laughed afterwards.

And there was not one class that didn't go by without one of the Weasleys cracking a few jokes. No teacher liked to admit they found them quite amusing but you could always see a small smirk hiding behind those stern words they spat back at them.

Except Snape. He never found anything amusing.

"You know he keeps watching you?" your friend whispered to you.

"Mhm, sure." you replied quietly.

"I'm not kidding."

"He flirts literally with half of the school except me." you rolled your eyes to her, feeling something heavy in your stomach. "He must think I'm ugly or something."

"That's not true, (y/n)!" she spoke a bit too loudly to get an ugly glance from the teacher. "You're a natural beauty. Maybe you're the one he likes. Have you ever thought of that?"

"No." you smiled at her. "Because it's not true."

Your friend rolled her eyes and looked back at him. His eyes glanced at her but only for a few seconds before focusing on the teacher. He even grabbed a pen to pretend he's taking notes but as soon as his pen hit the paper, his eyes focused back on you.

But the way you looked at each other hasn't told you a single thing because they were just looks and glances, never words, never affections. He is chatty and flirt with most people, most girls but he has never, even once approached you in any of those manners.

You didn't feel special. Never really and sometimes you really wanted to feel special. What girl doesn't? But you crawled up to your books and your dorm- or any peaceful finding you happened to stumble upon and you stayed there.

It wasn't unusual to find you in a library. It was unusual to find him in the library. He never roams there but it was like a sixth sense by now that you could feel him coming before he even entered the room.

His walk was very attractive- lean and loose. His hips swayed and never had you seen him stiff in your entire years in Hogwarts. He walked by his twin, who you could distinctively tell apart by now. Knowing which one is which made you feel obsessed with him already. You knew it was unhealthy but you just couldn't help yourself looking at this beautiful man.

He sat down to the group of Gryffindors a few dozen seats away from you and looked at you.

Eyes met and smiles appeared.

It felt like a forever moment that the two of you were looking at each other but you shyed away first. You pretended to study further but your mind couldn't stop thinking about your side profile or if your hair is pinned up properly. Are your cheeks red? Merlin, you hope they're not red. It'd be so embarrassing.

"Forgot how to use a comb, Melanie?" you heard him say to the girl next to him, touching her tangled hair.

"I could ask you the same thing, Fred." she replied, smiling as she ran her fingers through his sticky hair- seeing black smoking powder come out of it. "Or a shower." she laughed.

"No. Can you show me?" he winked and Melanie only rolled her eyes.

You felt your stomach turn into knots. Here you won't get any studying done- with him being near you and flirting with other girls... or just him being near you since his presence is so intoxicating.

You grabbed your things and started to leave when one of the Gryffindors stopped you.

"Hey, (Y/n)?" you heard Angelina call.

"Yeah." you turned around, a bit surprised.

"Have you done homework for Arithmancy. I really haven't gotten to it and you always have it." she pleaded with her eyes.

"Sorry, Angie." you shrugged. "I always do Arithmancy last minute because it's the easiest."

"The easiest?" laughed one of the twins. George it was. "How is Arithmancy easy."

"Well, if you figure out the system of how it works... then it's easy." you smiled as George leaned back on his chair.

"Then do mine?" he grinned.

"Five Galleons." you smirked and he laughed.

"Five? Expensive are we?"

"I'd say economical."

"I'll risk the scolding from the professor."

"Or just do the homework." you smiled then looked at Angelina. "If I finish it early, I'll send it off to you." you winked at her and left.

---

It wasn't until the next morning when you got a note from Angelina if you had managed to finish your homework. You felt annoyed, if you were completely honest. You didn't mind lending your homework to people but there was a difference between lending people and being used. Angelina was always nice to you and you knew that she was always a sincere person but sometimes you got a feeling that she never tried to do anything because she relied on you. What if you needed homework- you did at times, and nobody had one to lend it to you. It felt suspicious.

*snap*

It was like a turn of a switch when your sweet tooth started to ache so badly. You wanted that sweet chocolate rolls from Hogsmeade but it's already closed and it's cold outside- plus you've been trying to save money.

You rolled back on the bed and looked up at the ceiling.

You could always eat an apple?

"No way that's happening." you answered the little voice in your head. "When I'm craving chocolate, I eat chocolate." you jumped on your feet and put your clothes on. You checked in the mirror, no makeup this time and you felt okay with that.

You put your sneakers on last and just left the room, down the hallway out-

"Hey! (y/n)!" you heard Angelina behind you and you cringed before turning around with a smile.

"Hey." you waved and saw her whole friend group sitting there and chatting.

"I don't want to be annoying but did you finish it already?" she smiled and you retracted your smile.

You did but you didn't want her to know that. "Nope. Not yet."

"Can you hurry up then." said Melanie with a roll of her eyes.

"No, I won't." you snarked back. "If you think I'll do my homework just for you mates, you are most definitely wrong. Do it yourself." you continued, crossing your arms and backing away.

You were never that rude, but sometimes, even you had your buttons. You continued to stomp out of the common room, steam coming out of your ears as you kept ranting to yourself: "Just because they think they're funny and almighty, sitting there and waiting for me to do their homework for them- are they really that incapable to do it themselves. Especially Fred and George. George was the smart one, he always got good marks on any exam he ever took, he just pretended to be stupid. I noticed that a long time ago, the only difference for why he's hanging out with them lot is because of Fred and even then I don't know why he's hanging out with them- probably because they're really pretty." you stopped yourself in the middle of the corridor and then smiled in disbelief. "Hah! I can't believe I was so stupid all this time. I'm crushing on someone who is hanging out with people just because of their looks and not because of their smarts?! Why would I EVER want to be with somebody like that- IN A RELATIONSHIP!" you huffed, then started walking again fast and steady.

You felt somebody grab your elbow and stop you. With a reflex from your own sibling, you quickly pulled out your wand and pointed directly at his nose.

"WOAH WOAH WOAH!" he backed away with his hands in the air. "Calm down there, Road Runner."

"Fred?!" you exclaimed in shock, because believe it or not, he was the last person you expected to see. He might as well confess his feelings to you and this might end up being a movie. Or, he is here to smooth talk you into giving him your homework and then to that Melanie arse.

Your wall went up immediately.

"I am not giving you my homework and for the record why is everybody making a big deal out of this homework."

"A) because it's for Snape and even on a good day, he doesn't pity us and B) I'm not here for the homework. I think I am much more interesting than that."

Point taken. Especially with his gorgeous brown eyes.

No, (y/n)! Focus. You are mad!

"I can't believe you hang out with those people." you blurted out accidentally than quickly covered your mouth with your hand. "I am so sorry, Fred. I didn't mean to say that out loud."

"So you were thinking it." he narrowed his eyes and smirked.

"Yes- NO! No..." you tried to correct yourself. At this point it's better to keep quiet because everything you say, comes out wrong. "I'm sorry." you appologised again.

"No need to apologise. Everybody has a right to their opinion." he smiled softly. "It was me who wanted to apologise for back there." he put his hand on the back of his neck and chuckled in embarrassment. "I know it seems like we use you for school but I couldn't care less about that. Really." he dropped his hand back against his body and smiled awkwardly.

Merlin, he was so adorable all you wanted to do was kiss him here in the middle of corridor but you had to keep reminding yourself that he doesn't have the same feelings for your as you do for him. At one point that painted disappointment on your face but you managed to hide it away.

"It's okay." you let your shoulders drop and your body loose. "I was just about to make pancakes anyway."

He furrowed his eyebrows. "Non-related but can I join?"

You shrugged. "Sure, why not."

[shit-taster-connoisseur]

For the qsmp valetines event, for my giftee @routeriver

howdy!! sorry for the hold up on this one, i went through 4 drafts of this story idea many times until i settled for this one ultimately dhjex hope it's at leasy up to ur taste!!

Some warnings:

-mentions of cannibalism

-unhealthy relationships

-just girls being girls

-some relgious imagery

-a whole lotta demonic imagery/mentions of it at least

But please enjoy some demon!tina x human!bagi :)))

Word count: 1500

The other wordly consumed Bagi's mind, far longer than she was capable of remembering anything.

As where there were meant to be memories were feelings, thoughts–ones she drew down with crayons and a tiny fist. Ranging from spooky men in clothes, the shadowy figures in her room, and more often than not, demons. Demons whose horns curled into knife-like edges, gangly bodies, and claws who knew just how vulnerable human flesh is.

Her obsession sent her into a spiral.

From scrawling demonic pentagrams out of crayons, to drawing pentagrams out of her own blood in high school. It all amounted to nothing in the end.

No breakthroughs or simple summoning gone right.

So she had to become an adult when she was out of excuses. She became the proud graduate her parents wanted, and went to solve the mysteries of the real world.

But the itch to settle old affairs never left her.

So her brother presents her with a book, rustic and its bindings rotting–but ancient with a story: A witch that lived isolated in the woods. One day, the children of the nearest village began to go missing, one-by-one. A mob was sent knocking at the old hag's hut the next day, and what they found was not a rugged woman cooking their children for stew, but a creature ripped from the underworld. The mob forced to watch in horror as it gnawed their children to the bone.

The witch disappeared and was never found, and the story's ending equally lost to time.

The book had been the only trace left behind. Awaiting for its next champion.

So Bagi accepted it and followed it like a commandment and she was a prophet. She wasn't quite in her right mind. Like the witch, perhaps she too was going insane from her isolation, from the mundanity of real life.

And the book offers to fulfill her what she desired most in the world.

So she gets Tina.

There'd been many scenarios Bagi played of what ifs, the first was of what if she had gotten her hands on a demon. The first was taking its head to the street and proving everyone wrong.

But she couldn't do that. Because Tina was much prettier with her head attached to her body.

If Bagi had summoned her with the holy bible, she'd have gotten down on her knees and believed she was a goddess herself. And gladly Bagi would've spent the rest of her years groveling just at Tina's feet to be saved.

But no, Tina is a demon, a woman from hell who makes Bagi feel small, with claws that know the exact pressure to make her bleed, and skin that's a delicious shade of violet.

And Bagi loves her.

It's a realization that shouldn't have taken so long to deduce–Bagi would argue that she fell in love the moment she laid eyes on Tina; her chest had burned with a fire so hot when she took in the demon for the first time, Tina who was still doused in the glow of the summoning circle for which she came from.

The fire in her chest never ceased–even when Tina pestered her, when she once pushed a plate to the ground in an act of defiance when Bagi rejected her deals, offers of riches and fame, time-and-time again. Even when Tina had watched Bagi's chest heave up and down in her sleep every night, it only ever added fuel to the fire.

Because Tina cared. Sure, Bagi had been the reason Tina was bound to her, a chain handcuffed the demon through an oath before Lucifer himself, an unspoken tie between an evoker and the very thing invoked into the existing in the same plane. But she stayed, and she stayed even when she wasn't exactly trapped in Bagi specifically. There had been a world beyond Bagi's shabby walls, Tina could readily explore at the tips of her claws, a world she surely missed. She stayed.

The night they changed, Bagi asked only a question.

“Were you a human before?” She asks through her fatigue. The flashing colors of the tv bathed them both in its artificial light.

Tina had stood behind the couch where Bagi lounged, while her stature dwarfed it, she somehow leaned up against it, craning her spine.

Tina looked cute being so memorized by things so simple–so human. The tv has only a rerun of a show which had been background noise for Bagi, but somehow the center of Tina's world that night.

Such a simple question had ripped Tina out of that world. Bagi had to learn to forgive herself for it.

She looked perplexed, almost solemn as she had lamented over decades of her life.

Still she hadn't speaked, so Bagi almost forgets about it in the fog of her mind.

But like the sun, Tina parts it like clouds. With a, “yes.”

And it hadn't been a shock or a revelation for Bagi. There'd been the small things, like how she'd somehow recognize and listen to niche singers, how she seemed obsessed with an American cartoon show about a bird and cat, that she knew the aroma of tea by heart–all of these things hell wouldn't have.

After that, Tina became shy, a shell of that cocky demon when she thought she had Bagi wrapped around her finger on behalf of all of hell–which she did. When Bagi so much as spotted her, whether a shadow or of the mortal plane, she'd rush off in a flurry of mist.

Bagi hadn't blamed her; she felt like a teenage girl all over again. Obsessing, overthinking every little move a girl of the week made–for a second, she believed Tina hated her, was tired of the mundanity Bagi trapped herself in.

But that wasn't the case. When the thought manifested, a delusion always shoo-ed it away because as she said, Bagi was obsessed. And when she's obsessed, Bagi vision tunnels where she sees only her feelings–and it's unfair, it's unfair to Tina who's been back on earth for however long, who's still not used to the changes that manifested in her absence, and snuck into the world as visitor than a human, a mortal.

So the only thing Bagi was left to do was wait. She was willing to wait forever. As whatever haunts Tina, she'll talk about it–she'll talk to Bagi.

And talk she did. When Tina was finally tired of hiding in her shadows, and places far from Bagi's grasp–she leaned down into Bagi's embrace one day.

The smell of flora choking Bagi in its intensity, but it's addicting, like the cigarettes she had in her pocket that'd surely kill her one day, but no, Tina is a different type of addiction. Because she saved Bagi, and never will Bagi promise to stop the day after.

“I'm fucked up, Bagi.” Tina pleaded against Bagi's neck. But her warnings fell to deaf ears, as all Bagi could remember was the warmth of Tina's breath on her neck, and the vicious grip Tina had on her hips.

Tina ripped herself away, to balance both hands on either side of Bagi's head – she desperately missed her touch.

So Bagi took her cheeks in both hands to wipe away the stray drops of blood pouring out her eyes with a thumb–she could only remember Tina crying.

“You'll fucking hate me.” Tina warned the second time.

Bagi couldn't help but smile to her. Because it was ridiculous, a nightmare never to come true.

“I would never.”

“You will.”

Bagi's hands explored the ever foreign anatomy of her love's face–they eventually found its home, nestled behind and in Tina's white hair.

“It's impossible, Tina.”

“Why not?” Tina hissed, a claw sinking into Bagi's pillow–fluff leaking out. But Bagi had never been deterred once.

“Because I love you.” It made Tina's face soften, her bloody tears slowing, her shock had been palpable–but there'd been a doubt, she studied Bagi's face, looking for any crease in her expression that'd contradict her otherwise. Hoping she had been lying.

To silence it, Bagi leaned up to do something she'd been wanting, praying to do for eons. But it was Tina who kissed Bagi first, maybe, because it's Tina who pulled Bagi up further and connected them at last.

It's not what Bagi had dreamt of. It wasn't as passionate as she wanted, but better, so much better because it's Tina, and her world seemed more bright with Tina.

Amidst it, Tina whispered against her lips between breaths: “I will hurt you.” Spoke like a prophecy rather than a doubt. Bagi would allow it, she'd let Tina feast on her flesh before she went a day starving, she'd let Tina's claws draw wounds on her back if it meant she wouldn't be bored. God, Bagi would accept every slap or scratch, or really anything if it meant Tina would stay.

It hadn't occurred to Bagi then, but perhaps Tina meant hurting her in a different way.

-

[0cta9on]

Hoya there bud✌️ This ask is more of a fun discussion about an idol, how I grow fond of them. The idol in question is Jiwoo, NMIXX. Well you can skip my yapping of her and went straight to the ask at the bottom hahahaa.

_____________________________________

After binging quite decent amount of NMIXX content, Jiwoo randomly starting to be "how do I say this" kind of like she's being placed on my soft spot beside Sullyoon. I find her both cute and beautiful at the same time. Her slight bucking teeth and her puffy cheeks lik-arggggghh- so cute, I just want cup her face so bad.

God, I can write the whole ask about her facial feature alone, how I find both her toothy and non-toothy smile absolutely "beauty-cute" (Akhhhhhh my lack of vocabulary can't elaborate how I majestic she looks).

Keep this in mind back then, my first impression of Nmixx or even Jiwoo. "O.O" debut gives me an irk from the start of the song (Now I understand the hype behind it). Their visual overall was decent in my books back then. Before I start stan Nmixx, my only notion of Jiwoo is from countless short of her crying. Of course, my first judgement would be "Those IT GIRL maknae vibe". Look at me now? Nmixx being my top ULT girl group plus I highly regard group with noticeable vocal capability.

There's a cute accident, currently I learn a bit of Korean and by now I can read a bit of Hangeul (Well I learned it through Duolingo, so much debate Duolingo a shit app to learn a language, I don't give a crap, I already can tell the different pronunciation compared to native tik tok content) That time I was just trying my spelling skill in Korean. I want to spell JIU (from Dreamcatcher)

A bit of Korean for yah (This is my assumption on how it sounds like, I self study ok), 지우 > I thought it spell out JIU

지 > 'Ji' (ㅈ = J, ㅣ= i) and 우 > 'U' (우 = 'U')

But then it search up Jiwoo of Nmixx, now google thought my interest was towards Jiwoo and even my tik tok, Youtube, even tumblr filled with Jiwoo, I ain't complaining but it gives some content of her where the side of her I didn't know would be so attractive. So from there I see more of her and starting to fall in love with her.

Whoosh, maybe I know which idol I want to write now hahahah.

_____________________________________

May I know out of all the Nmixx member, How does Jiwoo and Haewon being one of the few Nmixx members you had written story for?

Look at this cutie, the urge to write more of her is killing me, I guess I will save it for her fic in the future.

Hope this give you slight mood booster

Hello mikeylo! First of all, HOW COME YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU RELEASED A FIC???? I'll read it when I get the chance, 13.2k words is impressive for your first fic :] (word of advice, you should probably put a "keep reading" bar near the beginning :> )

Jiwoo is a cutie :> Nmixx in general are great performers, but I like how she balances out their powerful vocals with her cool rap tone. I would love to write more Nmixx, I just need to finish the billion other drafts I have rn :,]

The Jiwoo piece I have was a short request, so that pretty much explains why I wrote her. If I'm being honest, I don't think I would've ever written her on my own unless I somehow got a really good idea for her :> The other Nmixx members aside from Kyujin rank higher on my list of priorities.

The Haewon smut was written simply bcs I found her hot at the time :> It was the first smut I've ever written, which means it's pretty bad :,] It's not that interesting plotwise and it's littered with corny dialogue, cliches, and mediocre smut. My expectations are a lot higher now, so time between releases has increased a lot since I want to make sure I never write something like Beach Day again :>

Have a Jiwoo <3 This hairstyle on her looks really good :0

[master-of-47-dudes]

So I showed the early stuff off a bit a few months back, but I've finally completed the first draft of Act 1 of my Lancer adventure path, Kindness of Strangers! The deets can be found on the pilot net discord, but:

LRBT-III, otherwise known as Blanche to the locals. This sun-baked dustbowl of a planet has the high honor of being one of the few habitable terrestrial bodies that anyone has discovered in the Long Rim- and probably the only one that's actually any use to anyone. Luckily- or not so luckily, if you ask some people- it was Union that found it first. Well, about 70 years ago when they stumbled across this star system they got it in their heads that the Long Rim's days were numbered. There’s untold millions living out there scattered along the emptiest shipping lane in the known galaxy who'd need a way out once no one needed to pass them by, and by Christ the Buddha Union was gonna be there for them waiting with open arms.

All of that is background, though. You? You’re a bunch of mercenaries who got their hands on a couple of GMSes, decided to make your manna selling violence for pay. Worlds like Blanche don't take to colonies very well, so even two generations in there's still plenty of frontier out there being settled and railroad tracks being laid. The people out there struggle day by day to survive, and people like you are there to protect them from those who got sick of the hard life. Not everyone out there has the guts to stand up for the little guy- that's why you're called Lancers.

A setting and a campaign all in one, Kindness Of Strangers and its (eventual) follow-up Dancing With the Devil are a series of Wild West-themed 2-mission adventures intended to take players from 0-12 as they find themselves embroiled in the midst of a corporate conspiracy to overthrow the Union-backed government of the isolated colony of Blanche and a ploy to seize control over a nearly completed Blinkstation. All the while, a strange religious movement worshipping an eons-dead alien civilization grows ever more influential in the background...

This campaign tackles themes of colonialism, nationalism, corruption, and conflict between indigenous peoples, settlers, and immigrants, all in a world where well-meaning intentions have gone sour and the ghosts of the past have come back to haunt it. It comes with:

- A setting guide for LRBT-III and its weird-as-hell star system!

- A 0-12 campaign split up into two books, Kindness of Strangers and Dancing With the Devil, that are made up of three 2-mission adventures each. And then a final mission to tie things up.

- 4 Alt-Frames: the IPS-N Nemo, the SSC Painted Lady, the Horus Roper, and the HA Grant (still working on these)

- New Reserves! (still working on these)

- New Exotic Gear (still working on these)

- New NPCs! (still working on these)

Things to look forward to:

- Rallying a town to fight off a horde of bandits!

- An epic duel at sunset!

- Accidentally walking into a partial metavault and escaping with the only scars being mental ones!

- A weird amount of references to the works of Tennessee Williams and Arthur Miller, like a probably legally dubious amount!

- Exploding plants!

- Exploding wildlife!

- The **CHRISTHEBUDDHASAURUS**

- Helping striking miners fight off Pinkertons!

- Investigating the bombing of a water filtration plant!

- AND MORE

...so this is really my first time doing this kind of thing so I don't entirely know what all to put here BUT I've put together first drafts of both the Field Guide to LRBT and Kindness of Strangers Act 1: A Streetcar Named Desire. They're not in any state where I can charge for them- I'd call them "playtest and editing ready" rn- but I figure I can share them here so people can give notes. If people think it's cool I could possibly do a kickstarter or something to get the money needed for art and help with editing and lcps and such.

Field Guide to LRBT:

Kindness of Strangers Act 1: A Streetcar Named Desire:

[jakowskis]

💖💙💜 owen harper bisexuality masterpost 💖💙💜

i've had this in my drafts for a minute but i figured i'd finish it up and post it today for bisexual visibility day :D

it hasn't cropped up recently, but i've seen a lot of people who've questioned owen's bisexuality over the years and i thought i'd compile all the 'evidence' (although it completely baffles me that we got a show with five canonical bisexual characters and people want to write two of them off as straight / "heterflexible" ?? there shouldn't have to be 'proof' of owen being bi, RTD said torchwood is about five bisexuals fighting aliens in cardiff which means they're all bi, full stop. also, bisexuals should never have to 'prove' they're bi, and in regards to fictional characters, i'm sick of people nit-picking who 'deserves' to be counted as rep and refusing to 'claim' certain characters if they're morally grey or if the fandom simply doesn't Like them as much-)

but i digress.

so without further ado, here's everything i've found that supports owen's status as a bicon :-)

explicit canon instances

➤➤ obviously, we have to start with his gay kiss in the first episode of the show. there's a lot to be said about that kiss, i'm not gonna get into all that here, but i've seen a lot of people say it's not proof of owen being attracted to men, and i wholeheartedly disagree. you can literally catch him smiling very happily after the kiss (and one of owen's few genuine smiles of the series, too). i don't think a straight man (or even a "heteroflexible" man) would beam at another guy who's just informed him that he wants to fuck him. a fair amount of people have also said they interpreted owen calling the taxi as him intending to get away from the couple, but i don't understand how they're getting that impression, because that smile makes it seem very much apparent to me that running away is the last thing he wants to do.

it's also, notably, the first time we see bisexuality IN the bisexual show, which i don't think should be discounted. like, we see owen do something gay before jack does, for fuck's sake. is it a good first impression of how torchwood portrays bisexuality? no. is setting owen up as a more sex-driven, opportunistic bisexual nicely contrasted against ianto & tosh's more romance-oriented brand of demisexual bi/pansexuality? in my opinion, yes. i love that the torchwood bisexuals all practice their bisexuality in different ways. that's very special to me. 'cause it's realistic! real bisexuals all experience bisexuality differently! obviously it'd be a different story if he was the only bi rep, because lord knows we've seen enough of that already, but torchwood makes an effort to show us five different brands of bisexuality, and five different bi stories that largely only exist in the subtext, that aren't the focus of the show, and it's fantastic. it's all i could ever want out of bi rep, honestly, even if it is a bit dated now.

➤➤ the other explicit moment in the show: asking tosh and ianto for an end-of-the-world threesome in sleeper (s2ep2). i've actually never seen owen bi-deniers (fhdskjf it's a conspiracy) even mention this scene. owen literally asks ianto if they can have sex with each other to his face, and he's dead serious when he asks it. that's... i mean you can't mistake that as anything else. like fhdsjkf??

➤➤ next we jump to some of the, i suppose, extended universe content. whether the books are canon or not is debated, but the novel 'another life' features owen playing an online simulation game, and it makes a point to depict owen flirting with someone with a male avatar + wondering to himself if the guy would be down for cyber-sex. [someone posted part of that scene here. for context, owen's also got a VR headset on during that bit.]

➤➤ another instance is on the website, which some also don't regard as canon, but, i mean, i don't know who worked on the things we see on that site, but obviously they got their information from somewhere. they probably consulted with the writers on the show, or at the very least got notes on what things to touch on. anyway, there's a portion of the site where you can find a 'background check' on owen, and it's just a collection of messages from some ex-lovers of his. one of them is a man.

again, some people disregard the canon validity of the website, but the way i see it, the information on this site was released while the show was airing for fans to look at and to gain further insight on the characters. one of the things they felt a need to tell us about owen, important enough to be featured in his background (wayyy before the katie plot was developed), was that he wasn't just interested in women. personally, i regard that as canon. you can find this here. and even if you wanna say fragments jossed this background, it doesn't joss his, like... identity.

next we have things said by russell t. davies himself + by burn gorman (owen's actor)

➤➤ again, RTD (who's torchwood's creator, but i'm assuming everyone reading this knows that) explicitly described torchwood as "a bunch of bisexuals living under cardiff and fighting aliens". that's not ambiguous. [i don't have a direct source for this quote, it was apparently said on the dvd extras.]

burn's comments on owen's sexuality include...

➤➤ (when asked who owen fancies) "Owen's pretty cocky, he'll try it on with whoever comes along." [x] and yes, this is vague, but vagueness is often interpreted as proof of bisexuality. (for example, in the pacific rim dvd features, newt's bio stating he was interested in "whoever will take him" was widely interpreted by the fandom as him being bi.)

➤➤ (in regards to owen's "let's all have sex" line) "I don't think he [...] thinks about the implications, or whether it's with a man or a woman." [x]

(ok i have to admit, although i absolutely adore burn, i'm not super fond of the way his 2006-08 self would talk about how torchwood handled sexuality*. however! he kind of hit the nail on the head in saying that, even if it's in the context of owen wanting end-of-the-world sex, because my take on how owen sees his own sexuality has always essentially boiled down to thinking he'd be like, "well, why wouldn't men also be an option?" (well, with sexual attraction anyway; i think owen's relationship with romantic attraction is far more complex.) i think he resembles jack in that way; anyone's a prospective sexual partner, if they're attractive and interesting and he decides he wants them, and he's also impulsive as hell, so he doesn't think too hard about gender in the moment if he decides he's into someone. there's not really any hang-ups.)

➤➤ and ofc...

(out of context this could look like he's just jokingly calling owen an alien-fucker, although owen makes his thoughts on alien-fucking pretty clear in countrycide lol, but it was said in the context of owen/andy as a ship [x].)

*if you're wondering what i'm referring to, it's a comment here [x] about how the torchwood team's bisexuality is a result of being in a pressure cooker environment and having a 'wartime mentality', and they just kind of 'take what they can get'. the implication that bisexuality is out of desperation/accessibility rather than attraction is pretty damn icky, BUT i love him lots and he generally seems to be pretty woke these days (+ otherwise has always seemed to grasp why torchwood's rep was so unique and groundbreaking and important) so i'll go ahead and hope that was just, y'know, simple 'being a straight guy in 2008' ignorance. fifteen years is a long time and i have faith his opinions have evolved by now, esp considering he used the word 'pansexual' at a 2016 con [x]. (actually, ok, you caught me, that last bit wasn't super relevant and i didn't need to bring it up, but i just wanted to gush about him doing it because how often do you hear that word out of celebs, especially older and presumably straight ones. and in 2016, too. kinda slay of him, ngl)

aaand finally, some random, non-explicit little things that i think support him being a bisexy king (several of these are goofy and half-serious)

➤➤ in episode 2, they make a point to cut to owen smiling after jack's line about "you people and your quaint little labels". one might argue he's smiling at gwen & carys on the screen, but cutting to him immediately after jack says it very much implies he's reacting to jack's words, and i think it's particularly poignant after, again, we saw him kiss a man the episode prior. (which, another thing - owen's literal introduction features him kissing a man, like that's gotta count for something. if the literal third thing i ever see a male character do ever is kiss a guy, that means something.)

➤➤ and of course, in the same episode, we get "period military is not the dress code of a straight man" .... owen's the only one of them with working gaydar. also what a fruity thing to say

➤➤ speaking of fruity things to say, in s2e10 when they're all watching the old film, owen goes "look at the state of them 💅" and he says it SO cunty for no reason it always kills me fhsdkjfd

➤➤ combat.

➤➤ no, really.

➤➤ bonus: in the combat commentary, it's mentioned that when RTD saw the above scene between mark & owen, he said it was "the gayest thing he'd ever seen".

➤➤ in the three monkeys, a big finish audio featuring owen & andy, owen flirts with andy repeatedly. even if he just does it to be annoying, it's still pretty damn gay. also the pet names... (he calls him sweetheart, sunshine, and tiger. it's half-mocking, sure, especially because it's owen, but there's also a domesticity to it.)

➤➤ and then there's the hope's "you're alive again and you want crisps?!" "be glad that's all i'm asking for" (owen was like 'i will not use this as an excuse to try to sleep w andy i will not use this as an excuse to try to sleep w andy i will not use th') these are the only two audios i've heard with this duo, i'm sure there's more examples in the other two. i know gooseberry literally has owen sabotaging andy's relationship with his gf and that is... woohoohoo.... i'll update this once i get through those.

➤➤ …. this is my personal opinion but i lowkey think he kinda wants john hart a bit when they all first meet him in kkbb hdskjfds. gwen & tosh both seem very charmed by him and they're meant to, it's supposed to be like 'oh, look at jack's ex waltzing in and charming the pants off everyone (ha), and only ianto and jack see through him' - owen isn't given a flirty line of dialogue or even a close-up shot of him eyeing john like the girls get, but if you watch him closely he certainly looks… intrigued by him. i think owen's more of a bi disaster than he lets on.

➤➤ in episode 10, diane notes that owen has "beauty products" in his bathroom. obviously this shouldn't be indicative of sexuality, but how many Straight Men in 2006 were moisturizing lmao. hell, how many do nowadays 😭

➤➤ gwen & owen's dynamic settles into a lovely little friendship in s2 and owen lowkey gives gbf vibes <3 them making fun of the movie in s2e10 together + the cheek-kissing at the end of s2e9… bi besties!!

➤➤ the peace sign he throws up in meat when he meets rhys fdsjk i don't even believe in some of the silly internet jokes abt bi culture but c'mon

➤➤ have you seen his taste in women. diane is soo butch and gwen's a total tomboy in s1. that's bi culture babey!!!! i too like girls when they're boys

➤➤ i already talked about it but the aforementioned scene where he asks tosh and ianto for a threesome... he asks them, like, immediately after they team up and bully him for not comprehending that there's "no phones. phones all broken. anyone there? no, 'cause the phones aren't working." that was suuuch a disaster bi owen moment for me. i too would get a little revved up if tosh and ianto both bullied me at once <3

aaand finally... the biggest Evidence of all....

➤➤ he's a leather jacket bisexual. need i say more

and that's all! thanks for reading!

[credit for the dividers used in this. didn't tumblr used to have built-in dividers? i miss that.]

[ghostinthelibrarywrites]

Come rest for the winter

The fifth installment of the Don't know what's out there series is up! This one is pretty much pure holiday fluff (yes, it's March, but let's just pretend it's still December.)

Relationships: pre-Geralt/Jaskier/Yennefer; established Geralt/Yennefer

Rating: T

Warnings: none

Word count: 14k

Summary: To help Jaskier combat a bad case of writer's block, Geralt and Yennefer invite him to celebrate Midwinter with their family at Kaer Morhen. But between making Midwinter ornaments, learning how to hold a sword, and tagging along on forktail hunts, Jaskier starts to realize something about his feelings for his two dearest friends.

Read the first couple of scenes below or here on AO3!

***

“Gerrrrrrrralt!”

Jaskier has an incredible ability to make Geralt’s two-syllable name stretch out to five or six syllables when he’s whining. With a sigh, Geralt peers into Jaskier’s living room, where his friend is sprawled dramatically on his couch, laptop perched precariously on his chest. “Hm?”

“In your professional opinion, is it possible to die of writer’s block? Because if so, I think I’m dying.”

“You’re not dying.”

“How do you know?”

“Because I’m a professional.” Geralt finishes stirring a ludicrous amount of cream into Jaskier’s coffee and strides into the living room to hand him his mug. As Jaskier reaches for it, his laptop starts to tilt. Geralt catches it just in time and relocates it safely to the end table.

Jaskier tilts back his head and lets out a groan that sounds more than a little like a dying kikimora. “I’m never going to finish this book.”

“You said that about the last book. Probably about the one before it too.”

“Yeah, but my publisher didn’t send either of those back to me because they hated the ending so much.” Jaskier heaves the sigh of a man who has seen untold horrors and will never be the same. “You should hear what they’ve been saying online since the release date got pushed back. People are saying I’m going to be the next C.R. George.”

Geralt shoves his legs out of the way so he can perch on the end of the couch. “You have to know I don’t know who that is.”

“He wrote the Heartsword Cycle.”

“Hm, right, one of my favorites.”

Jaskier lifts his head from the couch to squint at Geralt. “Really?”

“No.”

With another sigh, Jaskier flops back down, sloshing a good deal of coffee down his arm. “He wrote four of a five-book fantasy series, then got hit with writer’s block. For ten years, the final book kept getting delayed, until he went and dropped dead of a stroke. Then his publisher hired someone else to write the last book, but it was an enormous flop and everyone hated it. And two years later, his daughter announced she’d found a nearly-complete handwritten draft among his papers and released it online. There was a lawsuit and there’s this whole thing about which book is the real final book and—”

“Jaskier, you’re twenty-four and in reasonably good health. You’re unlikely to drop dead of a stroke.” Geralt takes a sip of his own coffee. “You just need to sit down and write it.”

“Oh, that’s easy for you to say.” Jaskier scowls up at him. He seems to be hamming up the whole tortured artist thing, with a week’s worth of scruffy facial hair. From the smell of him, he hasn’t bathed since at least yesterday, if not the day before. “What do you do when you’re stuck?”

Geralt shrugs. “I usually try one of Lambert’s bombs.” At his friend’s pensive look, he adds, “That wasn’t a suggestion.”

“But what if—”

“No.”

“Fine, then leave me to my suffering.” Jaskier takes a swig of what’s left of his coffee.

Geralt is tempted to do just that, except for the fact that he came over here just to alleviate Jaskier's suffering. He's been worried about his friend ever since the release of Will of the Order got delayed, especially since it came on the heels of yet another messy breakup. It's not like Jaskier to be lying on the couch in the middle of the afternoon, unshowered, still in his PJs, and seeming to not even have noticed that he just spilled coffee all over himself.

“Do... you want to go grab a drink?" Geralt asks. He has no desire to go grab a drink, but maybe an excuse to put pants and deodorant on will cheer Jaskier up.

That earns him an arched eyebrow. “Are you having a stroke? You want to go somewhere? Outside the house? With people?”

“I do occasionally go out and interact with people.”

“Since when?”

Geralt thinks about it. “I came to your college graduation.”

“That was two and a half years ago and Yenn made you.”

“I was still there,” Geralt says. “And I came to the launch party for Will of the Enchantress.”

“Yenn made you come to that too. You spent the whole night standing by the appetizers.”

Geralt shrugs, conceding the point. “The shrimp was good.”

Jaskier snorts with laughter. “Ugh, am I that pathetic that you’re willing to go out to a bar with me to cheer me up?”

“Yes,” Geralt says.

“Geralt, I’m touched.” Jaskier puts a hand over his heart. “And a little offended, but mostly touched.”

Geralt shrugs again. “When’s the last time you showered?”

Jaskier looks outraged. “Yesterday!” At Geralt’s raised eyebrow, he deflates. “Okay, maybe the day before.”

“And the last time you shaved?”

“I refuse to have my hygiene criticized by someone who uses 2-in-1 shampoo.”

“And yet, I showered today,” Geralt says. “And yesterday too.”

Jaskier groans. “I’m a mess, aren’t I?”

“Do you want me to be honest or encouraging?”

Jaskier sniffs. “Next time I need cheering up, can Yennefer be the one who comes over?”

“Do you really want that?”

“No.” Jaskier groans again. “It’s just, I was so proud of that ending! It was the ending I’d had in mind since I started the first book! And they just said it was ‘trite’ and ‘out of character’ and told me to start over.”

Geralt makes what he hopes is a vaguely encouraging noise.

“And I don’t know what to do now,” Jaskier says. “I just keep staring at my computer screen, hoping inspiration will strike, but words just aren’t working and ugh.”

“You have time.”

“I have a month. That’s no time at all.” Jaskier looks up at him beseechingly. “Geralt, I need you and Yenn to go do something heroic and inspiring that will get my creative juices flowing. If it contains some dramatic irony and moral ambiguity, all the better.”

“It’s winter,” Geralt tells him. “Most everything that requires me to be heroic is hibernating right now. And Yenn and I are leaving for Kaer Morhen this weekend. The whole point of going to Kaer Morhen is not having to do anything heroic.”

‘Fuck, I’m doomed.” Jaskier sags. “I’m going to be the laughingstock of the literary world. Everyone will know I’m a fraud.”

With a jolt, Geralt recognizes the salty scent of approaching tears. It’s been over five years since he first met Jaskier and he doesn’t think he’s ever seen the kid cry, except for that time he got his wisdom teeth taken out and then tried to watch nature documentaries with Geralt. Apparently, watching a gazelle get taken down by a crocodile was too much for him under the influence of painkillers.

But even that wasn’t this kind of despairing hopelessness. Geralt has seen Jaskier angry, frightened, indignant, hurt, and sick. But he’s never seen him so defeated.

“You could come with us to Kaer Morhen,” Geralt hears himself saying. “We’re spending Midwinter there. There will be five other witchers there, plus Triss, Ciri, and Cerys. That’s a lot of inspiration.”

Jaskier looks up at him with wide eyes. “I thought Kaer Morhen was just for family.”

“It is,” Geralt says and promptly regrets it when Jaskier’s lower lip begins to wobble. “It’s not a big deal.”

The next thing he knows, Jaskier’s arms are thrown around Geralt’s neck. Geralt just manages to save his cup of coffee, enduring the embrace for a long moment before he asks, “Does this mean you want to come?”

“Do I want to see the hallowed ground where you became the man you are today? Where you held your first sword and killed your first monster? Of course I do.”

“You can come so long as you don’t say shit like that.”

“You already extended the invitation, Geralt. No takesies, no backsies.”

“You should have no trouble finishing your book, with turns of phrases like that.” Geralt waits a moment for Jaskier to let go of him. When he keeps clinging on, he says, “If you keep hugging me, you’re going to need to at least put deodorant on first.”

“You were alive in the Middle Ages. There’s no way I’m the worst smelling thing that’s ever hugged you.”

“You’re right. There was the time I had a grave hag covered in alghoul guts clinging to my back. Long story.”

“And that hug is over.” Jaskier scrambles backwards. His eyes are still a little watery, but he seems to have composed himself. “Thank you, Geralt. Genuinely, I’m honored.”

Geralt shrugs, feeling unaccountably embarrassed. “Lambert’s been wanting to meet you anyway ever since you put Eskel in the second book. He wants to one-up him and get his own spin-off.” He pauses considering. “On second thought…”

“Nope!” Jaskier scrambles for the bedroom. “I’m going to go pack now. You can’t uninvite me if I’m already packed”

Geralt rolls his eyes at the ceiling. “We leave the day after tomorrow. You better shower first. I’m not spending all day in the car with you smelling like that.”

“Love you too, you grumpy fuck!”

With a sigh, Geralt goes to finish his coffee.

***

“Wow,” Priscilla drawls from her perch on the bottom of Jaskier’s bed. “You’re spending Midwinter with the sugar daddies. It’s getting serious.”

Jaskier raises his head from where he’s searching under his bed for his favorite sweatshirt to glare at her. “You need to stop calling them that.”

“I don’t think I do,” she says. “Since they are, in fact, your sugar daddies.”

“If they are, they’re quite bad at it. They gave me socks and a gift card for my birthday.”

Priscilla shakes her head mournfully. “They just don’t make sugar daddies like they used to.”

Jaskier throws a pillow at her. “I’ve already told you, it’s not like that. They’re just being nice and inviting me along to Midwinter so I won’t spend it alone with a frozen pizza and a blank Word document.”

Priscilla doesn’t even bother voicing her skepticism; it’s well-documented at this point. “You could have come to Midwinter in Cidaris with me and Valdo.”

Jaskier shudders theatrically as he throws his sweatshirt into his suitcase. The fact that Priscilla is now dating and fronting a two-person folk band with his college sometimes-crush, sometimes-nemesis, Valdo Marx, is still bizarre to him, though he thinks he’s taking it with a measure of grace. “The frozen pizza and blank Word document is better company than Valdo. No offense.”

“He would say the same about you.”

“Well, he never had very good taste.” At the raised eyebrow that earns him, Jaskier hastens to add, “About everything besides girlfriends, of course.”

“Of course,” Priscilla says dryly. “So, back to the sugar daddies—”

“I already told you, they’re not—”

“You’re going to spend two weeks in the mountains with them and their family?”

“Yeah, Geralt has two brothers and a father,” Jaskier says carefully as he throws a handful of boxers and socks into the suitcase. “And then there’s their daughter and her girlfriend—”

“Geralt and Yennefer have a kid?” Priscilla’s eyebrows draw together in confusion. “You’ve never mentioned her.”

Abruptly, Jaskier remembers that for all Priscilla’s jokes about sugar daddies, Geralt and Yennefer look no older than their mid-thirties, while Ciri looks like she’s just out of college. “They adopted her when she was twelve,” he says, which is technically true. “She lives in Skellige with her girlfriend now, but I’ve met her a few times.”

“So.” Priscilla’s lips curl into a smirk. “Does this make you her brother or her stepfather?”

Jaskier throws another pillow at her. “You’re the worst and I don’t know why we’re friends.”

“We’re friends because I was the only person in our hall who didn’t threaten you with bodily harm freshman year for blasting showtunes all day, every day. And because I had the good sense not to sleep with you when you hit on me.”

“You and Valdo have equally terrible taste.”

Priscilla throws the pillow back at him, hitting him full in the face. “Look, all I’m saying is that you’re going to be spending two weeks at some picturesque cabin in the mountains.”

From what Jaskier has heard, Kaer Morhen is more of a looming castle than a picturesque cabin, but he doesn’t bring that up.

“There will be hot chocolate, Midwinter lanterns, snow. It sounds awfully romantic.”

Jaskier blinks at her. He’s never considered Midwinter a particularly romantic time of year, given that he’s spent most of his Midwinters either being reminded of what a disappointment he is to his parents or at Essi’s place, watching her and Shani canoodle. “Their entire family will be there.”

“I don’t know, it’s like something out of a movie. They take you to meet the family, you bond with their daughter, maybe you twist your ankle skiing and Geralt has to carry you gallantly back to the cabin—”

“Skiing? Really, it’s like you don’t know me at all.”

“Maybe you twist your ankle walking down the stairs?”

“Slightly more likely.” Jaskier starts to zip his suitcase, realizes that he doesn’t have a chance in hell of getting it closed, and grabs a duffel bag to relocate some of his things. “Have you forgotten that Geralt and Yennefer are as good as married? To each other? And I don’t think they’re looking for a third.” At Priscilla’s pointed look, he hastily adds, “Not that I would be interested if they were. I’m just going to spend some time with friends and to get my creative juices flowing.”

“I don’t know if it will be the creative juices flowing.”

Jaskier throws the pillow back at her, and then the two remaining pillows on his bed for good measure. She makes no effort to defend herself, which he takes as an admission that she knows she deserves it.

***

“He won’t be any trouble,” Geralt says, cradling his phone between his ear and his shoulder as he throws an armful of underwear into his suitcase.

Zipping her own suitcase closed, Yennefer snorts pointedly.

Geralt’s eyes flicker to her and his lips twitch. “Well, he might be trouble, but not the kind you’re worried about. He won’t write about Kaer Morhen if we ask him not to. He’s respected the other things we’ve told him were off-limits, like Ciri.”

Yennefer can hear the rumble of Vesemir’s voice from the other side of the phone.

“Sorry for the late notice,” Geralt says. “I would have invited him sooner if I realized he didn’t have plans for Midwinter.”

Yennefer cocks an eyebrow at that. Geralt has never given a single damn about holidays, including Midwinter, in the entire time she’s known him. The only reason he deigns to celebrate Belleteyn is because it’s Yennefer and Ciri’s birthday. 

“See you in a few days,” Geralt says. “Tell the others not to drink all the White Gull without me.”

As he hangs up, Yennefer asks, “How did he take it?” Vesemir has always been fiercely protective of Kaer Morhen. It took him years to get used to Yennefer’s presence, and even longer to get used to Aiden’s.

Geralt shrugs. “He’s not thrilled by the late notice, but he says there’s plenty of food and liquor to go around. I think he’s just happy that there will be something to distract Lambert from finding new ways to blow things up.”

“It’s not like Vesemir to be overly optimistic,” Yennefer says. “Have you warned Jaskier that he’s in for two weeks of drinking that horrible White Gull and watching you spar?”

“I’m not letting him touch White Gull. Kid’s a lightweight.” He circles around the bed to stand behind her, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Anyway, I think a quiet Midwinter will do him good.”

She leans back into his embrace, closing her eyes. “I wouldn’t call Kaer Morhen ‘quiet,’ especially once the bombs come out. Remember to keep Jaskier away from those. I can’t heal him if he gets his arm blown off.”

Behind her, she can feel Geralt’s wince. “Maybe this isn’t a good idea.”

“Probably not, but it’s just as bad an idea to leave him unattended for two weeks. He’s good at finding trouble.”

Geralt huffs a laugh and presses a kiss to the sensitive spot under her ear. “That he is. Befriended us, after all.”

“A rare moment of good sense on his part.”

“Hm, if you say so.” Geralt kisses her again. “Not looking forward to the drive though. Sixteen hours is a long time to spend in the car. And you can’t curse him to be quiet.”

“Oh, Geralt.” She turns to face him, cupping his face in her hands. “You know that I love you more than anything in this sphere or any other, right?”

His face softens. “It may have come up once or twice.”

“And there’s almost nothing that I wouldn’t do for you.” She brushes her thumb over the scar slashing across his eye. “Almost nothing. Because no matter how much I love you, I am not spending sixteen hours in a car. I will be portaling to Kaer Morhen. You and Jaskier have fun on your road trip.”

***

When Jaskier pulls up in front of Geralt and Yennefer’s townhouse, he finds Geralt leaning against the bed of his truck, arms crossed over his chest and an unimpressed look on his face. 

“Yes, yes,” Jaskier calls as he scrambles out of his car, nearly forgetting to park the car and turn it off in his haste. “I know I’m a teensy bit late—”

“I told you we were leaving at six. It’s nearly seven.”

“I stopped for coffee!” Jaskier raises his tray of drinks like an offering to the sky. “Caramel latte for me, cappuccino for Yenn, black coffee for you.”

“And that took you an hour?”

“Well the barista wrote her number on my cup so I had to stop and chat so she’d know why she probably won’t hear from me for the next two weeks. I’d hate for her to spend her Midwinter pining.”

“Can’t have that.” Geralt’s annoyed expression softens as he takes the tray of coffees. “And Yenn portaled ahead, so it will just be you and me. She refuses to spend two days driving to Kaer Morhen.”

Jaskier covers up his surprise by rolling his eyes. “What a diva.”

“I’m going to tell her you said that.”

“We’ve discussed this,” Jaskier says as he retrieves his bags from the backseat of his car—his suitcase, a small duffel bag, his guitar case, and the messenger bag where he stores his laptop. “I’m not even a little bit afraid of your partner.”

“Sure you’re not.” Geralt’s eyebrow raises as he surveys Jaskier’s luggage. “I invited you for Midwinter, not to move in. Don’t think Vesemir is looking for a roommate.”

“Har,” Jaskier deadpans. “You did warn me that it would be cold in the keep.”

“So your plan is to wear all your clothes at once?”

“It’s adorable that you think I could fit all the clothes I own in this little thing.” Jaskier pats the duffel bag.

“Looks like you could fit your entire apartment in there, couch and all.”

“Well, I have no idea what to expect, so I packed for all occasions. Drink your coffee. Maybe it will make you less grumpy. I’ll get the next round too.”

“We’re not stopping a thousand times for coffee.”

“It’s what, sixteen hours of driving in total?” Jaskier flashes his most innocent smile. “That means I’ll need at least eight stops for coffee. Once every other hour is reasonable, don’t you think?”

Geralt rolls his eyes. “Get in the truck, Jaskier.”

“Six times? That’s my final offer.”

“I will leave you.”

“No you won’t.” But Jaskier climbs into the passenger seat anyway. “I stayed up late making us a road trip playlist. I think you’ll like it. It has everything from modern pop to classic rock to sea shanties.”

“A playlist?” Geralt says the word like Jaskier has announced he’s going to set a wyvern loose in the car.

“But of course! It’s not a road trip without music.”

“Of course not,” Geralt grumbles and starts the car.

***

“Baby, you’re a firewooooooork!”

“I’m going to leave you at the next rest stop.”

“Make ‘em go ah ah ah!”

“Not going to wait for the next rest stop. I’m going to leave you right here on the side of the road.”

“As you shoot across the sky—Geralt, why are you pulling over? Geralt!”

***

Read the rest on AO3!

[cervicrazed]

🐖 for nyle? he still around?

Oh man what a throwback‼️

He's been in stasis while I've been developing Dead Wood but rest assured he's not retired just yet!

More about this Deep Cut Character below:

^ This is Nyle Clervey! (2019) ^ This is Nyle as drawn by @/voyvoyz

✨- How did you come up with the OC’s name?

For his first name I gave him the "boy version" of my deadname (first time experimenting w/ aliases) and his last name derived from Frankenstein's Henry Clerval. I was in 6th grade at the time and incorrectly assumed Henry was a black character for some reason which is wild considering his pro-colonization stance but whatever

🌼 - How old are they? (Or approximate age range)

The amount of notes I kept on his timeline is insane. To keep a long story short, he's from an alt timeline where prohibition wasn't lifted until the 1940's instead of the 30's. (There's also aliens in this setting!) He was born in 1915 but the oldest I've ever drawn/written him is in his early 30s

🌺- Do they have any love interest(s)?

His wonderful wife Miyoko!!!! When Nyle met her, she was an acrobatist for a traveling circus. He was smitten at first sight and made a point to talk to her after every show. As soon as he found out she wasn't happy there, he promised to help her escape - making good on said promise the very next night. They were unofficially married about a month later.

🍕 - What is their favorite food?

Coddies!! sometimes referred to as "the poor man's crab cake"

little deep fried cod patties made w/ mashed potatoes, eggs, salt n pepper, onions, + crushed up saltines. They're simple to make and cheap to buy! He would even use em as bait for fishing 🎣

💼 - What do they do for a living?

Officially, Nyle helps run a sleepy bookstore in East Harlem called "The Open Book" & plays trumpet for jazz clubs on the weekends. Off the record, he's a bootlegger and co-owner of the speakeasy hidden underneath the shop.

🎹 - Do they have any hobbies?

When not practicing his scales, his favorite hobby is having book club with his wife and coworkers. Sometimes the club really is about reading books, other times it's code for drinking in the speakeasy's off hours (and attempting to read a book together afterwards)

🎯 -What do they do best?

While most would call him a talented liar, Nyle insists that it's just good improv

🥊 -What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

He loves music more than anything (except his wife), jumping from the fiddle to the trumpet in hopes of raising his chances of joining a jazz band. His favorite musicians + greatest inspirations are Duke Ellington and Louie Armstrong

Nyle hates wasting time. He's not a stickler when it comes to time management, he just hates being held up when he has a task in mind. If he sees a long line, he'll find a way to cut around it.

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories?

The summer of 1925 - the last one he'd spend in Virginia. Stealing berries from neighbor's bushes, shooting cans with his slingshot, sneaking into the cinema with friends to watch 'Don Q: Son of Zoro', and even learning how to drive! (he very slowly crashed his father's jalopy into the big tree in their front yard)

It will forever remain a fond summer in his memory

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

February, 1942 - he'd planned a wonderful valentine's day for Miyoko, but had been drafted just three days before he got to surprise her. They weren't sending married men over at first, so he'd thought he'd evaded it. When he told her the news, Miyoko swore that she would wait for him to come back.

He was abducted on his way to bootcamp and doesn't know how long he's been gone or how long she's been waiting. It eats at him every day he spends away from her

🧊 - Is their current design the first one?

lmao not at alllll

Originally he was just a silly little guy w/ emoticons for a face + a cowboy hat. He slowly became more as I added more characters & started high school my hyperfixation on 1920s-1940's social life

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

Wander over Yonder!! It had just come out and I also wanted to have a silly protagonist who went on space adventures and embodied the boundless joy of the indomitable human spirit!! Nyle did unfortunately get a little more sad as time went on, but he's still optimistic!

🌂 - What genre do they belong in?

Historical Fiction! Episodic Sci-Fi Comedy against his will

💚 - What is your OC’s gender identity and sexuality?

Cis + Het! A rarity!

🙌 - How many sibling does your OC have?

In his first draft he had 2 - Ian (older) & Oscar (younger)

I shelved Oscar for the new timeline, but am still on the fence w/ Ian

Don't know how to integrate him just yet

🍎 - What is the OC’s relationship w/their parents like?

Nyle adores his parents! His mother was a schoolteacher and his father was a deliveryman/rumrunner. He idolized his father and believed the tall tales (and true stories) he'd spin for him.

He died in the winter of 1926 due to influenza, leading Nyle to form an even closer and protective bond with his mother

He'd do absolutely anything for her

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

funnily enough, the research that went into making him

I used to get "into headspace" when writing for him as a fun exercise and a lot of that involved pouring over archived letters/ledgers and historical antecedentes while listening to Harlem Renaissance Jazz

I know that may sound boring as hell but rest assured I had hours of endless entertainment diving down those rabbit holes.

✏️ - How often do you draw/write about the OC?

Not really that often now a days - this ask is the first time I'd properly written about him in a few years

💎 - Do you ever see yourself killing off the OC?

I did at one point, but it went poorly with test audiences so I scrapped it. Until I find a good reason to do it, I don't think I will.

💀 - Does your OC have any phobias?

That when he finally finds a way to get back to earth, Miyoko's corpse will be there; still waiting for him.

🍩 -Who is your OC’s arch-nemesis or rival?

Amylla! "huh??" i hear you ask "just how old is this woman??" Don't you know you can't ask that

She's technically after the aliens that abducted him, but the misery of being separated from his wife is too delicious for her to pass up.

She is the only person he's ever truly despised.

🎓 - How long have you had the OC?

Since middle school!

🍥 - What age were you when you created the OC?

11 or 12 (baby....)

[devil-on-acid]

The Heart of Eywa Pilot

Chapter 1

A/n: i could not stop myself from writing this. This is my first time writing fanfiction after reading them for years. I hope you guys enjoy it. fort the most part i wrote this to let my creativity out and to heal my post Avatar TWOW depression. Sorta warning i wrote half of this while under the influence and later on fixed the mistakes and some sentencing. Also note that English is not my first language so my vocabulary is not impressive. Please enjoy this first draft/pilot. Any feedback and comments are appreciated.

Genre: Thriller/Isekai/Fantasy/Sci-fi

No Pairings yet

Word count: 3,301

 _________

I know myself, i’m obsessive. I have hyperfixations. Hobbies and will do anything to make days go by faster. I am one of those people who are sometimes not aware of what is happening. My emotions not in tune with my body. My feelings are cut off from my responses, i am…..

i was never able to cry when i wanted to or when i needed it. Instead of feeling numb i went to feeling everything all at once. That is the only way i can describe it in short.

But if i am being true. This feeling i have is indescrible.

And all of this came from nothing but a single unrealistic wish i had while trying to fall asleep.

 ________________

Third pov

The year is 2023, slowly it’s getting colder at night but warmer at day. The freezing cold prickling at your skin and the wind sharp in your face. During the day it’s still cold but the sun comes out alot more. The enjoyable heat of the sun coming through the windows a start of a new day.

A girl no older then 17 is currently in her room weaving and braiding a band from string in a multitude of vibrant colours. Colors who are getting harder and harder to find in nature. As she is braiding we hear the background noise of music softly spilling into the room. The girl in question keeps her head down as she braids the strands delicately tot the beat of the music. The laptop it is playing from sitting far beside her on the desk facing the wall. Everytime she looks up she studies the massive collection of posters up on her wall. Posters of music she loves. Movies, series, artworks made by hand. The one in the middle had just been added to her wall. A poster of the movie Avatar the Way of Water. It’s blue color looking back at her. It has been a month ever since watching the new instalment and (y/n) felt nostalgic evertime she looks at it. the feeling of wanting to leave this place getting larger and larger she looks at that wall. she often imagine stepping up to it and would hope the wall could just swallow her up as if a portal had transformed it.

_________

(y/n) pov

It was a normal night of settling down for the night. Doing something else besides studying or working. Some time for myself to work on hobbies or anything that has gotten my interest lately. I often times like to stare at the wall in front of me. My huge collection feeling overwhelming and soothing at the same time. I tend to think about how many stories have actually been made in such a way as we make them now, we are al storytellers as humans i presume. The amount of fantasy needed for it is already impressive to begin with. I often get lost in the music of soundtracks playing in the background while i work. I always like fantasy, action, sci-fi and thriller. But my childhood favorite has always been Avatar (2009). It was the first sci-fi action movie i watched. But i found it a fantasy as well. The whole world so thought out a full book can be written about the Culture of the Na’vi and the beautiful Flora and Fauna of planet Pandora. If i’ll ever be able to make a wish it would bet to get transported there. Living the life of a free Na’vi. Exploring the forest of pandora, instead of living month after month in a little gray box. It feels so wrong to think we live like this, most of us. Not knowing what to do with our lives as so much is expected from us. The pressure building up and your body feeling more tired then ever. That feeling has been crawling in the back of my throat the older i got. The more responsibilities that i didn’t want the larger the hollow and empty feeling in my chest. Work, eat, go to sleep,  repeat the day. I am not the only one feeling like this. People around me have expressed the same feeling. And still i wonder how they manage to push trough as well as they do. It almost fills me with curiosity and jealousy.

Braiding away at the new necklace that i am making i start having this uneasy feeling. I try to ignore the feeling and try to concentrate on my work. Focusing on the beat of the background music coming from my laptop. But the more time past and the sun went under the bigger my paranoia became. The more i try to ignore everything around me the more blurry my vision got from starting at my hands. At some point i was ripped away from my dazed state only to get goosebumps all over the back of my neck and my arms. The laptop my music came from had stopped playing the music and instead an awfull buzzing sound came from it. like the electronics started to malfunction. panic seeps trough my skin as i start the hear the music again, but there was something wrong about it. it was slower and was playing backwards. Trying as fast as i could i turn off the laptop and sit back down. Trying to calm my breathing, slowing my heartbeat.

As my mind began to clear i was able to stand up again. ‘’its probably just something wrong with the laptop, its 10 years old anyways’’ ‘’nothing is going to hurt you, you are not in danger’’ ‘’you are savely in your house with all windows locked’’

With those thoughts all i was able to cal myself down, checking the time i noticed it was already 00:47 at night. Better to go sleep instead of staying awake much longer. I changed into my pyjamas, brushed my teeth and my hair and layed down in my bed. When i get scared or i feel like there is something wrong i always hide away in bed. Maybe even hide under the covers if i want to. It was a habit of my childhood that stuck with me even to now.

As i was laying in my bed trying to sleep i tried tot hink of the many possibilities of getting out of here. Wheter escaping from this house and moving to a place i felt happier or escaping this world completely, everything is possible in your dreams anyway so why not indulge in a fantasy for a few hours until you go back to your endless working cycle. The house was unusually quiet. My parents where both visiting my aunt abroad and my sibling has their own place 20 min away from here. The usual sounds of snoring from my father in the other room and the buzzing sounds of the washing machine weren’t here. It was deadquiet.

As i’m laying down trying to get comfortable i force my eyes to close, instead of staring at the ceiling. I try to make my mind go black and slow down my rapid thoughts. However one thought came to me that i was unable to get rid of no matter how hard i tried. The most unrealistic wish i ever made. Because it wasn’t real. But to be able to dream about it, to dream about Pandora is a privelege.

Before i know it i feel myself being pulled away by this reality and into the next. I let the serenitiy take over my mind and body and accept everything coming my way. the aches of my body dissapear, the stress in my shoulders lift up out of my body. This feeling, the feeling of flying, a dream i tend to have a great many of times washes over me like a wave of water. my mind at peace when i slip into unconciousnes.

I see a tunnel light up completely by white glowing vines. I am being pulled by my entire body through this tunnel at such a high speed i wanted to close my eyes from being blinded.

And then everything went black. It stayed like that for it felt like hours. Just staring at the blackness as peacefull bliss fills my body. Slowy i start to feel sensations again. I can feel my bare skin touching what felt like grass or moss. The cold breeze flowing over my skin, i can feel how humid and warm the air is. I try to hang on to what i feel. my ears start to pick up sounds one by one. The wind. The moving of plants all around me. The sounds of bugs, birds and other animals i can’t recognise filling my mind. Wanting to see my suroundings i try to move my body. Trying to twitch any muscle i can think of. My fingers, my toes, my face and my eyes. It felt like i was laying there for over 20 min before the sensation in my legs came back to me. My body waking up from my toes, up to my calves, to my stomach, my arms and upper body. When my back and neck where able to move. I take in the deepest breath i could, pulling in my stomach before letting go again.

The air was so fresh i enjoyed every second of it. being completely awake now i open my eyes too fast and got blinded by the sun. Wait…..the sun. I tried to pry my eyes open again blinking a few times to sharped my vision. The first thing i saw where the enormus trees towering over me. Looking down from it i was overwhelmed by beauty all around me. The grass and moss on the ground was greener then i’ve ver seen in real life, the ferns and flowers all looked to be tropical species i had never seen before.

It took a bit before my mind caught up to me. ‘’i must still be asleep.’’  I kept repeating that to myself as much as possible ‘’you’re asleep, you’re alseep, you’re asleep. No one can hurt you in your own dream’’ but as much as i was trying to convince myself it didn’t feel like i was telling myself the truth. This, wherever i was looks and feels way to real for it to be a dream.

Last option. Pinch or hurt myself into waking up. I pinch myself on my arm, doesn’t work, i scratch myself on my wrist, i’m not waking up. But now i look at my hands in shock and wonder. Five fingers on each hand. My skin is a beautiful Azure blue colour with darker stripes in patterns along my body. Softly glowing freckles on my hands up onto my arms and down my stomach and legs.  I put my hands up to feel my face, it felt the same as it did before i went to sleep, but my ears are higher onto my head. I am able to twich and move them, picking up even the slightest of sounds with them. I pull my hands behind me and feel the back of my head. A long braid from the center of my head goes all the way down over my back towards the ground. As i looks behind me my new tail is swishing back and forth on the ground. And i come to the realisation that this can’t be a dream. This is way too real. Wheter it is a dream or not i am unable to wake up.

 My wish, my unrealistic ‘’i want to go to sleep’’ wish came true.

‘’i’m on Pandora’’

 ‘’WAIT….what the…’’ i shoudered in a shaky breath by what was coming over me, my mind was having a hard time believing what i was saying out loud. This is impossible.

‘’i’m on Pandora, and i’m na’vi’’

With my new eyes i scanned and observed my sourroundings. I was amazed at how much i see. Every tree, strongly rooted into the ground. So many type of plants, flowers and moss around me. Never had i seen a forest like this one. Not even in the pictures of the earth i saw online. Or the footage i saw in documentaries.

I try to move my legs and sit up properly to stand up. As i try to stand up with difficulty i have to grab onto the tree nearest to me. I stand there a bit letting the dissiness fade away and test my legs. Slowly walking a circle to see where i am or rather where to go. I try to think about the possibilities that i have. I have no idea in what year i got into here on Pandora but that would be difficult to find out without anything that doesn’t involve  technology or the humans. Do the Na’vi even count the years ? or the months ?. i don’t think so. I’m not even sure how that would go.

The best options i have on foot is see if i can recognise anything, a scene from the movies, or a sign of life. Hoping i won’t run into any dangerous animals i choose a direction and started walking. Feeling every leave and fern i touch. The green moss feeling soft to walk on. The more and more i walked the more types of bugs and small animals i encounter. I can hear prolemuris swinging above me from tree to tree. Sometimes seeing Arachnoids crawling upon the trees. My mind started to wonder, if i truly am here, where are the others currently ?, are they already gone, or do they still reside in Hometree. Is Jake already on Pandora as well ? or has he been here for years already. All of these questions can decide my fate. I don’t know where i’m walking to, but the most likely thing to happen is getting killed by an animal or being found by a clan and being killed for being a Dreamwalker. That name really does fit me in this case. I’m essentially walking in a dream.

The it wasn’t that much light left anymore in the forest. Soon the sun will dissapear during eclipse. But i am too distracted by the world around me. Around me i find more and more shimmyflies soflty fluttering from one plant to the next. I was hypnotized by it’s eight iridescent wings and delicate build. Trying to touch one was difficult. They looked almost too fragile to even touch anything they come in contact with. Like the thinnest ice melting away after a single touch.

I mindlesly follow the insect like creatures flying all in the same direction. Some of them flying up into the trees. Other left behind to go someplace else. It wasn’t long till i realised the sun had completely dissapeared. I was in a rather dark spot still following the shimmyfly. I looked at my feet with each step. The ground of moss on the floor reacting to my steps with it’s bioluminecent light. creating a path of my footsteps that fades away withing seconds. I start feeling like the sounds around me go in sync. Each small droplet of water, each insect, each call and chirp from the animals mixed together. Like music to my ears. i’m getting more and more lost from where i’m going, but it didn’t matter. I was so calm and at peace here. I could feel my skin tinteling as if pain doesn’t exist. The more i listened the more it almost felt like i was hearing actual music was playing around me. It felt like i wasn’t alone. As if there was a comforting presence of something or someone all around me. It made the drifting feel slower then it actually was. But it still then felt like i was watching the biolouminescence of the forest for hours. Sometimes just trying to spot more small insects. Other times touching plants to see their reaction in colour.

But unbeknowns to me, it actually was hours that i was walking. My body starting to feel faint from being so tired. I tried to still figure out a new direction to follow, i can’t remember which direction i came from. Taking another few steps i start hearing the dripping sound of water.

‘’That must be a river’’ i was getting thirsty from the warm humid air. Putting a faster pace on my walking i follow the sounds of the river water the best i could.

___________

Third pov

Walking through the forest you want to make your presence almost invisible. the forest of pandora holds many dangers. You need to be alert, silent, and quick. That is what a hunter was doing at that very moment. Hiding in the trees looking for any smell, sound, or track from an animal to hunt.

Being in there for more then an hour the hunter went back and forth looking for any clue of animals passing through the area. What he didn’t expect however where the presence of a great amount of shimmyflies around. Shimmyflies where difficult to find this deep in the forest. It wasn’t till long that he realised there was something wrong, something or someone was there that was unfamiliar. A scent he did not recognise as any animal he knew of.

Going further into the new direction he chose. Not wanting to be spotted he climbed into the trees so he could see from above. Watching carefully at any change or sign of life. A little further away he stopped abruptly. Right down on the ground further away he saw a person walking slowly the opposite direction, right towards the river. The person now identified as a young girl was dressed in peculiar clothing, clothing not completely the same as the Sky People. But still a red flag to look out for. The girl was dressed in just a thin dress. Carrying no weapons as far as the eyes could see.

This could mean only one thing, a sky demon invading into their land. No matter how outnumbered the demon was it was still a cause of concern in the mind of the na’vi hunter. As quiet as he could go he ran to his ikran in a hurry, making Tsaheylu and flying back to the village. He knew where the sky demon was headed and he wasn’t far from the village, if he was fast enough he could warn the other warriors and the Olo'eyktan about this and they would be back before she drifted to far from this part of the forest.

after the war with the Sky people years ago, they sended them all back to their own planet, the dying planet they destroyed for their own greed.

Only a few where chosen to stay, scientists loyal to the protection of pandora and it’s natives. Loyal to the omaticaya. But out of those humans none of the avatar drivers have been young females, only adults known by the clan and recognisable to them. Even then they never venture this far from Hells gate and not on their own.

These thoughts worried the warrior fearing the worst. Flying at a faster pace trying to reach his destination. Looking down the area one last time remembering the way back, it was a completely dark spot. The bioluminescence gone from the area where he just ventured. Completely dark against the night sky protecting a certain Na’vi girl from the aerial hunters.

__

Meanwhile the girl was still drifting, unaware that she was being watched. Shock settling into her body as she was still accepting and processing what happend to her. All that matters now is staying alive long enough to find the only people she might know, the Omaticaya.

[relmsramblins]

Changing Plans

TLDR; many of my WIPs change massively from idea to first/final drafts. What are some of the largest changes in your WIPs/finished works?

since I haven’t been writing as much, I decided I wanted to talk about one of my experiences with WIPs that I don’t see talked about much. Which is the transformation from early stages to first full draft.

now, my experience may be somewhat unique because I don’t think I have a serious WIP that has been in the mental oven for less than… two years? So I’m that time, there have been major major overhauls to each story.

For Heart of the Empire the entire (hand written) story was originally only one book in length and followed Hullin through its entirety. (small spoiler for the end of book one I supposed) I started writing it in high school and finished it my senior year of college, so it took the better part of ten years. After I finished it, I tabled it for about a year or three. When I came back to it, I decided Ízbeth (originally Elizabeth, sue me for unoriginality I guess) was a much better POV for the first book and would make the story much more compelling from the start.

For Sentient War, in the very very early stages it was a Star Wars clone Fic but quickly jumped into my own universe with it. I’ve been world building the galaxy in it for ever, but never quite found the right flow to tell the story. Honestly probably gone through the least amount of heavy overhaul - more just expansion.

Dash - my first book in the 12+ book Legacy Novels - started out as a bear-future dystopian story, but I decided I wanted to write a steampunk story and there wasn’t anything about it that couldn’t be changed. Since then, the story has gone through several shifts in tone, characterization, world building, and expansion. But I think it’s my only story that has complete switched Genres from the original concept to first draft.

So fellow writeblrs, what is the largest major change a story of yours has undergone from idea to first draft? I’d love to hear in the comments and reblobs?

@fleurtygurl @caxycreations @ember-writer

[mygeekcorner]

Fine I'll give you some more book asks since you acted all pathetic and reblogged it again and begged for more: 18, 25, 30, 42, 43, 50, 51, 55, 61, 67, 68, 80, 86, 99, 100, 102 (lol), 104, 117, 118, 124. Also you must answer them all in one sitting (no drafting) otherwise the curse of the procrastinating tumblrina will fall upon you

Hahahaha omg yes, brilliant, love it, love you

18 your least favorite book ever

I mean there have been a fair few bad choices I've picked up along the way. But that I actually finished?

I really do think it might have been Twilight. Granted I did go in expecting to hate it, but it still managed to be blander and worse than I thought it had any right to be for a series with such devoted following.

25 a book by your favourite author

I said this in another answer but I don't really have favourite authors like that anymore. There are many good authours out there and I will read a series or two but I don't go looking for their names like I used to. But so far I guess Erin Morgenstern is a 2 for 2 author with very beautiful prose in both The Night Circus and The Starless Sea

30 your favourite middle grade book

So I've already talked about Narnia, HP, and my love for Eva Ibbotson but that was pretty much what I read back then. So I'll just mention Which Witch? by Eva Ibbotson as well. I don't remember many details from it, but I do remember that I laughed my way through it, which is never a bad thing.

42 a book that made you want to scream by the time you got to the end

I remember A Storm of Swords by George RR Martin made me call you and scream at your answering machine lol

It was bad enough that the Red Wedding happened, but then right after we've seen the massacre the next chapter is from Aryas point of view again and it's her and Sandor reaching Riverrun and she is So Close to being with her family again, to being safe. But he is mean and harsh and won't let her run off and if I remember correctly he takes out his fucking axe and hits her in the head with it. And that's how the chapter ends???

I mean obviosuly he hit her with the blunt side and only enough to knock her out, but we have Just Seen how you can't trust anyone, and then she's with this big mean killing machine who she doesn't get along with, and he hits her with an axe??? Fuck man! Rude-ass bitch is what Martin is. But what else is new, you know?

43 a book that you have read more than three times

Harry Potter. And yes, I am well aware about how much we're all hating on Rowling now, please don't misunderstand me. But I had read the first 3 books over 30 times before the series finished. I used to re-read them about once a year. There is not a single book that even comes close to the amount of times I've read them. No, not even Narnia.

50 a book that made you cry a LOT

The Glass Lake by Maeve Binchy fucking wrecked me when I read it in high school. Like it is off to a pretty grim start with a mother leaving her family and them thinking she killed herself as is, but then it gets even More emotional. I remember this one chapter that just left me sitting there shellshocked for the better part of an hour, those of you who have read it will know when.

51 a book that you found underwhelming

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I know! I'm sorry! I love the movie and bbc miniseries as much as the next hopeless romantic but the book just kind of... didn't live up to it? Reading it you can kind of tell that it is her first novel and certain things are a bit rushed and clumsy. I still enjoyed it, but I was expecting to love it, you know?

55 a book with a satisfying ending

Chronicles of Narnia: The Last Battle. Them dying just felt right to me. Not that I wanted them to die-die of course, but the way that it happens? Yes. It all came full circle and I always found a certain comfort in the way he let them die and stay dead (to our world).

None of this rising from the dead bullshit. Just tell a good story and wrap it up like a neat little bodybag. Only cowards let protagonists rise from the dead. Looking at you JK, yes even when I first read the book.

61 your favourite horror novel

Ok so reminiscing on books I read as a kid has me thinking, one of the books that really had me Scared for real when reading was probably The Witches by Roald Dahl. And like yes, I know, it's a childrens book. But it's a Scary childrens book. And I was a Child. I just remember the horror as he found out he was stuck in a hotel infested with child-eating witches *shudder*

67 your favourite historical fiction novel

Rhett Butler's People by Donald McCaig, I really enjoyed Gone With The Wind, but this published fanfic/spinoff/prequel to that is just so good. It made me care for the characters in a whole new light all over again. And he always was my favourite out of all the original cast so it was nice to have some more ideas about what he had done before Scarlet threw that first vase at him.

68 your favourite piece of classic literature

Can I say Shakespeare here or did it have to be written as books-books? I'm deciding books-books is the premise so I guess I'm putting down Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë. I don't like the ending, but after the book mentioned in #86 a bit further down it is better now. And I think it's the classic I've come back to the most so...

80 a book that reminds you of a loved one

The Demon's Lexicon by Sarah Rees Brennan that @hobbitsus lent me in high school was just a blast to read and I remember it fondly. And the whole story is just so very Her from when we were growing up which adds to the love.

86 a book with an insane plot twist

The Eyre Affair by Jasper Fforde. Yes again with me bringing in published fanfic of classic works but the whole premise is so good! There are people who can jump into books? There is someone who manages to jump into an original manuscript, thus changing all the copies of the book? There are detectives working on putting the original Jeyen Eyre back into order when this happens to her? And that is the reason the book ends the way it does??? Amazing.

I never quite liked the ending in Jane Eyre, there is this bit that just seems to come out of nowhere to me. In this book? It's because Detective Thursday was there doing whatever she wanted. This fanfic makes the original work better. But the way it twists to do so? 11/10

99 a book with a strong female protagonist

The Deed of Paksenarrion by Elizabeth Moon gives us all that Girl power Asexuality Forge your own path representation and I am here for it. Does the last book feel like the same series as the first book? Not even slightly. But the books are still a fun ride and I recommend anyone wanting to read about a farmer's daughter running away to join the army and then being actually good at her job give it a try.

100 your favourite gothic novel

ok so in like my mind Gothic should be Old. Old as balls. But I will also admit to Wanting to read books that old more than I Actually read them. So I will be cringe enough to just go with Interview With The Vampire by Anne Rice cause that's the book I loved in high school and the internet lets me classify it as goth even if it doesn't feel right

102 your favourite dark academia read

What even counts as Dark Academia though??? I feel like it should be an ancient and heavy-ass tome but most things I read are quite modern? Can I say The Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley? Like the book took up a good part of my backpack when I read it in school, that should count for something right?

I liked the way it spanned three generations' worth of stories and all the mysticism going on. It was my first Arthurian fiction as well which felt very Big and Impressive at the time.

104 a fluffy, sweet read

A Hundred Pieces Of Me by Lucy Dillon was a really comforting and nice read that I liked way more than I thought I would when it comes to chick lit. I think of that book whenever I try to pick out a vase now lol

117 your favourite anthology

So do we count fairy tales here or no? Cause I kind of want to say Bland Tomtar Och Troll which is that swedish collection of childrens stories that had the most exquisite art in it and I was especially obsessed with the story about the mermaid Akmea who saved the beautiful sailor, or the one with the kindly white lion who showed up in someones yard.

Sidenote: I went through these old books to find the pictures since google was no help and one has an inscription wishing me a happy 4th birthday, and one has me trying to write my name and it is the most stiltedly awkward penmanship ever and my gosh that's the cutest thing 🥺

118 your favourite short story collection

Hoo.. I don't read a lot of those but when I was in high school they would give out little paperbacks called "Färdlektyr" with assorted short stories and poems and I always looked forward to that semester's edition, does that count?

124 the book you’re currently reading

I started on The Forest Of Stars by Heather Kassner a while back, and realised that the first 5 chapters do not live up to my hopes and so have not read anything since I had to put it down at the end of a lunch break OTL

These were a lot to do in one sitting! I did take a short break for dinner, but otherwise I did do it all in one go, please be happy? :*