#if anyone reads through this whole thing congrats!

[risingsunresistance]

been getting back into mother 3 after All That and every time i see the sunflower field im like. whoa. that's so neat. i am Not overthinking it !

[naanook]

Seeing you again - B.K

synopsis: it's here if you want to read it! (You don't need to read it to understand this one, plus, i changed a few things)

words: 1.3k

contains: cheating! (I condone this behavior but... bakugou... yeah), use of y/n (like twice? I think) reader's gender is not said <3, you/them pronoun, suggestive(?)

nana's note: welll~ it's finally here! Thank you to the people to ask for this, I haven't write it if it wasn't for yall <3. I read it myself, but I'm kind of dyslexic and my first language isn't english so be mindful please! If you notice any misspelling or grammatical mistakes you can let me know! (I'm soo so nervous to publish this lol, it's also my first time writing something kind-of long in english, please be kind <3)

When you left to America, Bakugou was furious, after all you all have been through, he thought this will unite the group, will unite the both of you.

He was pacing in his room, looking at the floor as he thought of ways to make you stay, damn, he even thought in confessing his feelings for you, thinking it might change something, his last hope.

After what felt like an eternity, he decided to walk towards the common area where he knew he'll find you and ask for a minute of your time. Only to be met with sad expressions and you… nowhere to be seen.

“Sorry man, they already left” said Kirishima and he felt like all of the air of his lungs where punched out. “I saw them standing outside your room for I while, I thought you two talked” Kirishima adds, which only makes Bakugou feel worst.

Eleven years has passed, Bakugou had achieved everything he wished when he was a teenager, He was the number one hero, had a nice relationship with his coworkers, friends and was not insecure anymore and of course… had a beautiful fiancé, patient, funny and smart.

The thought of you leaving still lingered, but he always made sure to push it away, telling himself it was a stupid teenage crush and that he was over it.

“Bakugou!” Kirishima's voice “you're coming tonight, are you?” He asks, looking excited

“Huh? What are you talking about?” The blond asks

“The UA reunion party at Kaminari's! Midoriya will be there, and I heard (y/n) was going” Kirishima says and Bakugou just freezes “you're coming then?”

“Y-yeah- yeah” Katsuki answers, still not processing the whole information correctly, but he nods anyways.

“Great! Do you think you can pick me up?” Kiri asks, trying to keep the conversation going, but Bakugou only nods, lost in thought.

Later that day, Bakugou pulls out in front of Kaminari's house, swallowing hard as he gets out of the car

“Oh man, I'm so excited to see everyone, I've heard (y/n) has a great career in America, and they’re one of the top heroes there, we have so much to catch up on” Bakugou grunts as he hears your name, looking away and mentally preparing himself as he walks inside Denki's place.

He looks around, searching for you but he doesn't see you, making him feel more relaxed, thinking you haven't arrived yet, leaving him time to compose and prepare for your arrival.

Bakugou engaged in a few conversations, with Sero, Mina, Midoriya and anyone he can encounter, trying to take off his mind off… you- there you were, speaking with Iida in a corner, you looked… marvelous, and for a second, the blonde forgot he was engaged.

“Did you hear that?” Denki asks to a Bakugou who was completely lost in you, he shakes his head, slowly starting to walk in your direction, like something was pulling him towards you.

When he sees you looking at him, he let's out a small gasp, reminding himself to act normal as you finish your conversation with Iida to walk towards him.

“Hi!” You say, with that sweet voice, bringing thousands of memories back.

“Hey” Bakugou says back, trying to act normal, calm.

“I heard lots of you lately, congrats on being the number one, you always wanted that” he hears you talk, you sound… happy

“Heh, thanks, it was obvious tho, I am the best” he smiles at your giggle for his comment “h-how have you been?” And like that, two old friends feel like sixteen again, chatting and laughing together.

“You know, I still remember that day” Bakugou hears you say, you were both outside in Denki's backyard, stargazing as you both drink “I stood outside your door, wanting, no- wishing to stay, I even thought of confessing my feelings for you in that moment, thinking it would change something” you whisper, kind of embarrassed to say such an intimate thing, and Bakugou just freezes at your next words “i-… think i never stopped”.

Katsuki doesn’t say anything, he doesn’t even move as he thinks at your words, you… You like him? You were going to stay for him? Everything could have been different, so different.

“Y-you like me?” He asks, turning his eyes at you “i-i'm… I'm engaged” the blonde whispers, mostly to himself as he looks down, thinking what's next

“I-i know” he hears your weak voice “i think I'm just trying to…. Close this cycle” you shift, looking at the sky and taking a sip of your drink

“I'm… in love with you” Bakugou whispers and meets your eyes; your face full of surprise “i-i think I always did” he adds, moving closer to you, looking at your lips and licking his own

“B-Bakugou” you whisper

“I know… damn it” Bakugou whispers and quickly move away, taking your words as a no, feeling rejected and guilty at the same time, he couldn’t do that to his fiancé, it was not ok, what kind of men would he be if-

“W-we can do it… if you want” He stops thinking again at your words, looking at you once again, admiring those lips he always wanted to taste.

Bakugou leans forward one more time, looking at your eyes, silently asking for permission, and when he sees that look in your eyes, fill with desire and eagerness, all the world around him disappears as well as all the problems this kiss will bring to him.

He groans once he crushes his lips against yours, wrapping and sucking on your lower lips eagerly and passionately.

The kiss deepens as he pulls you closer, one hand tangled in your hair while the other wraps around your waist. Your lips move together in perfect synchronization, years of longing and unspoken feelings poured into this single moment. His touch is gentle yet demanding, tender yet passionate, making your heart race with every movement. You can feel the warmth of his breath, taste the sweetness of his lips, and sense the overwhelming love in the way he holds you. Time seems to stand still as you both lose yourselves in this intimate embrace, neither wanting to break away from this perfect moment you've both waited so long to share.

Bakugou pulls away gently, still leaving small kisses on your lips “c’mon to Sparky’s room, please, let’s allow ourself a moment more… intimate” he begs with his eyes, looking at you as he stands up and guides you through the house, ignoring everyone around him.

Once Kaminari's bedroom door closes, he kisses you again with renewed passion, gently guiding you toward the bed.

His hands explore your abdomen tentatively, seeking permission for more, and once granted, he cannot hold back.

He opens his eyes again, the sun entering through the curtains bothering his eyes, Bakugou sighs and looks down at you, laying asleep on his chest as he starts to remember the night before your lips on him, your skin, your warmth- he sighs, closing his eyes again as the guilt starts to sink in.

“Good morning” a voice pulls him away from his thoughts, making him open his eyes again, smiling gently at you.

“Good morning” he says back, his hand moving over your back, caressing it gently under the sheets

“Where’s Denki?” you said, like you suddenly remembered this isn’t your room.

“I made him sleep on his couch after the party was over” Bakugou says and smiles as he hears your laugh, hugging you tightly as you press your head in the crook of his neck.

Oh god. He’s so screwed

tags 🖇 - @lex2205 @d1orhaz3 @cocoballsblonde @disaster-rose

[sleepingdeath-light]

how he confesses to his s/o hcs ; fyodor dostoevsky

requested by ; anonymous (event)

fandom(s) ; bungou stray dogs

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; fyodor dostoevsky

outline ; “hi hi for your 4.4k event can i request how undertaker, choso and fyodor would confess to reader ^^ congrats on the milestone btw!! (*^ω^*)”

warning(s) ; none, just fluff!

first thing’s first but it is going to take fyodor quite a while to come to terms with the fact that he has feelings for you — that’s not to say he’s oblivious to his own emotions or wilfully ignorant of how his mind and body react to your presence, just that he’s not going to act impulsively on what may be just a fleeting infatuation and, instead, will give himself plenty of time to consider his feelings and, if he comes to the conclusion that he wants to act on them, to plan how he intends to woo you

… or, rather, how he intends to get you to confess to him because it’s fyodor and there’s a snowball’s chance in hell of him ever letting himself be vulnerable in front of anyone

even the person he plans to marry one day

and unless you know fyodor incredibly well and are incredibly good at reading the most minute changes in his facial expressions and body language (unlikely unless you’re actually dazai or at the very least extremely similar to him), it’s damn near impossible for you to tell that his feelings for you go beyond an appreciation for your work ethic and contribution to the d.o.a, meaning he has plenty of time to go through with his planning and such without anyone suspecting a thing

(outside of maybe a bit of teasing from nikolai, but after spending more than a few consecutive minutes around him it’s easy to tune out the utter nonsense he says as white noise — or, for you, to dismiss it as his usual weird teasing)

now, moving onto the whole confession thing itself because, in typical dostoevsky fashion, he ends up settling on a whole convoluted plan to get what (who) he wants

the first phase of his plan involves a lot of research (stalking, really) so that he can learn everything there is to know about you (likes/dislikes, allergies, relationships, routine, medical history, hobbies, exes, etc.) — both so that he’s able to present a version of himself to you that you’re sure to find impressive and attractive, and to reaffirm to himself that his feelings for you are real and unshakeable and not based on some false version of you he created in his head, for example

then he starts to shift around your schedule so that you’re spending more time in his company, incrementally increasing his one-on-one interactions with you until you’re so comfortable around him that you’re confident enough to question him on his methods and engage in actual conversations with him — setting the stage very effectively for the two of you to be able to have a relationship as equal partners in the future (he wants to take you as a lover, a spouse, not as another unquestioning devotee like ivan)

after that it takes a few months for the two of you to go from colleagues to somewhat friendly to actual friends, and even longer for him to start noticing signs that point to you developing actual romantic feelings for him (which, naturally, occurs before you realise you have a crush on him yourself), but fyodor is a remarkably patient man who has nothing but time on his hands so he doesn’t mind the wait

but being patient doesn’t mean that he’s above teasing you here and there both because fyodor is kind of an asshole who likes to see you flustered, and because he is, after all, trying to get you to confess your feelings to him so that he doesn’t have to do the whole ‘being vulnerable’ thing — so, yeah, expect to spend however long being teased by your boss until you finally crack and say those sweet little words that you’ve been swallowing back for weeks

and once you finally, finally, confess he will be quick to reciprocate with a brief but shockingly heartfelt ‘and i, you’ before pressing a chaste kiss to your knuckles and asking you out on a date that he knows for certain you’ll love (because of all the stalking research he did)

(the more traditionally romantic declarations of love can wait until after your first date)

[acheronist]

to the ghost of henry peglar, congrats on writing your poem down 177 years ago!!!

to the actual academic scholars who have studied the pages before me....

so I took the royal museum greenwich's scan of the poem page (which is available online hereeee) and screwed around with its light levels in photoshop until henry's script was darkened enough to see more clearly. then I digitally traced over the darkened letters as best as I could, while also trying to discern his handwriting, and type up how I was reading it & this process took me about a week to get done between like... living my regular day to day life lmao.......

so when it WAS done, the final isabel acheronist peglar papers ["the open C"] transcript seemed a bit different than how I remembered the readily available russell potter transcript going ? (the poem is on the last two pages of that pdf for those of you who don't spend a billion hours a week looking at it btw)

it felt like I was getting more/different information out of it, compared to the potter transcript, which was kind of stressing me out honestly. so THEN I compared mine with barry cornwall's original poem and found more words that matched up? particularly in the second and third stanzas?

so!!!!! almost two hundred years later here's what I've landed on:

April 21 1847 the C the C the open C it grew so fresh the Ever free the Ever free the Ever free without it without it covered it will Run to Earth above Re gions Round I love the C I love the C when I whare & I wish to be with and and silence whare Never go if a sailor should a Come and Make the meek What matter what matter Come Ride Or Sleep there was shores white and of red morn at the noisy hours knew I was ever near I was Born the [...] in felt Unto the Maid the wale the young dolphin ...... yet thes back of gold the Call of gods When I was on Old England Shore I like the young C more and more oftentimes time flew to a sweltering place like a bird thats seeks it mother Case and ware she was bird oft to me for have I loved a young and Hopen C

so then after going thru All Of That, I wanted to have a version of the original poem with parts that Henry did remember clearly highlighted for comparison purposes:

I know it's a popular theory that Henry was writing a dirty parody of the original poem? which if true, is funny as hell. me when i have to write cheeky victorian porn before i die.

But (serious voice) something about that hadn't ever seemed exactly right to me... IN MY HEART it seems more realistic that around 1847 he (and also by extension, the whole surviving expedition crew) were starting to experience confusion / brain fog symptoms from being ummmm quite physically unwell. the lead poisoning/scurvy combo would have severe effects on the brain's ability to function properly, and I started to wonder if Henry was trying to test his memory somehow? So he picked a widely known and popular Victorian era poem about being a sailor to see how much he could recall??? and he then got a little whimsical with it, and wrote in his own words to fill in the portions he couldn't fully recall, because it's his own diary and likely didn't expect anyone else to ever read it, much less have it turn into ONE of TWO surviving sources about the expedition?????

like... idk... this is probably the work of someone in the exact moment as they were starting to realize how bad things were, and then was trying to cope by using poetry. and That hurts my feelings enough as it is, but going through it was also just a very weird and haunting experience....... like, I can recognize all these tiny details in this dead guy's script and handwriting now. and to read his own account of his life in his own words, what stood out to him and what he recalled, what he wanted people in the future to know about him? insane. it literally felt like i was getting haunted by him for no reason. on top of knowing that Someone (#teamarmitage) loved this guy enough to keep his memory protected and safe, even though They Were So Totally Fucked And Going To Die There, unknowing if they'd ever be found again........

SIGHING + SIGHING + SIGHING + SIGHING + CRYING A BIT HONESTLY

anyways thanks for reading this all. I don't think that this is revolutionary franklin expedition news by any means, and idk if there's a better different transcript somewhere that i've not found that already covers all this? but it's consumed a lot of my life lately lol and i wanted to share. because its the anniversary of henry writing it, and it felt...... important....? 💌....????

[froschli96]

You know what, fuck it, I have to speak my truth! (this is gonna be a rant, so anyone who actually likes assassin's creed revelations and/or the secret crusade, be warned or maybe don't read this at all)

remember how altaïr talks to king richard at the end of ac1, and richard is like "[humans] come into the world kicking and screaming, violent and unstable. it is what we are. we cannot help ourselves."? and how altaïr answers "no. we are what we choose to be." and how that ACTUALLY has meaning bc he himself was "violent and unstable" at the beginning of the game but he has learned and is now CHOOSING to be a better person who cares about others and humanity at large? remember how his calmness and gentleness was something that he ACQUIRED over the course of the story?

and remember how in revelations they then suddenly had a PRE-AC1 altaïr say about the first of his targets "no man should pass from this world without knowing some kindness." and be all wise and calm and collected during a nice little chat with al mualim, who suddenly acts all fatherly? (like, this is suddenly supposed to be a positive relationship? what??)

also, during the confession the target says to altair: "you put too much faith in the hearts of men, altaïr. [...] humans are weak, base, and petty." and altaïr answers: "no. our creed is evidence to the contrary." KJASJFJDKL???? like, it’s almost insulting how close this exchange is to the one with richard. you know, the one that was actually earned after a whole game of character development. like WTF??? cool congrats now that development means nothing. like, apparently that was just altaïr reverting BACK to being the exemplary assassin who understands and believes in the creed that he was apparently just born as. (i also hate how having a young inexperienced altaïr saying this implies that altaïr's faith in humanity is a sign of naivete instead of a sign of the wisdom he has gained after being confronted with counter arguments for a whole game, and also something that distinguishes the assassins from the templars who use humanity's supposed wickedness to justify controlling them like in AC1, but whatever)

altaïr’s development in AC1 mattered BECAUSE he is not NATURALLY a good person, it actually said something about humanity's capacity for both bad AND good and how humans don't have to be forced to be good through mind control bc they can by their own free will choose to be better when taught how and when allowed the freedom to grow. but no. apparently altaïr has just always been calm, wise and gentle. and he just sort of forgot about that during AC1 bc…. ? bc of adha?? bc of abbas???

oh don’t get me started on the whole abbas thing. (it doesnt even make sense that abbas is so hung up about his father and "his family’s honor", like what about the whole point of al mualim not allowing parents to be close to their children bc it would make them weak? like, my dude, you’re not supposed to HAVE any family aside from the brotherhood)

they used the throwaway character that had like 5 lines and made him into altaïr’s main antagonist in revelations… like, abbas wasn’t supposed to be this ONE dude who had personal beef with altaïr, he was just supposed to show how while altaïr’s revered by many, a lot of his brothers also hate him, bc 1) altaïr is a shitty person at this point and 2) bc there’s no real feeling of community and family in this version of the brotherhood, but just a pervasive sense of competition and jealousy — these assassins don’t care about their goal of safeguarding humanity bc they’re too hung up on petty squabbles and divided by rivalries (you know, the things that made malik hate altaïr even before solomon’s temple and that he overcomes in the end which enables him to forgive and to reconcile with altaïr so they can work together and stop al mualim? (you ever just think about "we are one. as we share the glory of our victories, so too should we share the pain of our defeat. in this way we grow closer. we grow stronger." and cry? bc i do. all the time. malik, the man that you are))

and now abbas is altaïr’s childhood best friend turned lifelong enemy?? like, bowden bent over backwards to come up with an explanation for why altaïr is an arrogant ass at the beginning of AC1, when the explanation is right there: he was raised to kill without asking questions and was constantly praised for how good he is at murder, which resulted in him becoming arrogant and disregarding human life. like, it doesn’t have to be some shakespearean family feud type shit. and guess what, this "simple" explanation actually plays into the story’s themes, who’da thunk!

(like, abbas might not have been a "fleshed out" character in AC1, but he had a specific function and now that function is gone. mr bowden, mr mcdevitt, you know characters are allowed to simply exist to tell us something about their worlds and the systems they live in and sometimes that’s more important and also more interesting than having every single character have a detailed backstory to explain all their behaviors, right?)

with all of this revelations loses all nuance in regards to the levantine brotherhood and also the creed in general. like, altaïr being a master assassin at the beginning despite being a terrible person and not actually understanding the creed is a criticism of the brotherhood and the creed itself. like, it said something about the order that someone like altaïr was able to get that high in rank, simply bc he's good at killing, which also tells us what is considered important in the al mualim era assassin order. when you make altaïr’s arrogance the result of his personal conflicts instead of how we was raised by a brotherhood that only valued one's ability to kill, you lose that characterization of the assassin order itself!

and by suddenly making al mualim a semi good "father figure" you also downplay his manipulation of not only altaïr but all those under his care. (altaïr says something about al mualim being "as a father" to him exactly twice in the codex, but he doesn’t mean by that that he WAS a father to him, what he means is that he was the CLOSEST THING he had bc HE DID NOT HAVE PARENTS, not because his mother died in childbirth and his father was executed when he was young btw, BUT BECAUSE IT WASN’T ALLOWED, like his parents actually lived but weren’t allowed to be close to him, he says he came to view al mualim’s "weak and dishonest" love as enough and even better BECAUSE HE HAD NOTHING ELSE, BECAUSE AL MUALIM ISOLATED HIS ASSASSINS FROM THEIR FAMILIES. al mualim "loved" him bc he was good at killing people for him! hm, i wonder if this could be trying to say anything about cults and indoctrination and the inherent contradiction in fighting for peace and free will by taking children away from their parents and raising them to become killers?? like, altaïr wasn't ~the special orphan boy~ taken in by al mualim bc his father died a hero's death, it was "the way of the order" to have al mualim be the closest thing to a parental figure for everyone to ensure absolute loyalty! altaïr saying al mualim was like his father is not supposed to make you go "oh, he must have actually been a good guy for altaïr to consider him a father", it should make you go "oh that's kinda fucked up that he considers the dude who made him into a killing machine and who manipulated him a sort of father figure"!)

and then in revelations they suddenly portray that relationship as positive and healthy??? like, it would be one thing to give it some nuance by delving into the psychology behind al mualim’s "love" and maybe showing how al mualim did care about altair in a complicated, fraught sort of way (like, you know, there’s a lot of interesting things you could say about al mualim at several points addressing altaïr as "my child" in AC1 and how that parallels Garnier referring to the people he drugged and abused as his "children", and what that says about how the templars view the people who they say they want to save and in whose best interests they supposedly act (in any case, al mualim doesn’t use that phrase because he has any real parental feelings but rather to patronize and to invalidate any objections, like in a "mother knows best" way))

but they even fucking DARE to parallel that relationship with that of altaïr and darim in revelations, by having the reflection in the puddle of darim hugging altaïr showing altaïr hugging al mualim…. like their relationship wasn’t inherently abusive but just tragically cut short because al mualim was just "corrupted by the apple"… like WHAT???? so it’s not the very real problems like grooming, manipulation and indoctrination and the hierarchical structure of the brotherhood itself (all of which are antithetical to the assassin ideology), it was just the evil apple all along. great. that’s DEFINITELY a lot more interesting.

god im sorry i really dont want to spread negativity but this is driving me INSANE. like, somebody please tell me im not crazy bc i feel like somehow most of the fandom is in agreement that revelations and the secret crusade have better storytelling and characterization than ac1.

SPEAKING OF WHICH, can we talk about how, even IF we completely ignore AC1 and treat revelations altaïr as his own character…. the narrative still doesn’t really work?

basically, the whole point of his story in rev is that "he gave his whole life to the brotherhood", this obsession led to him not using his time with his family which has him ending up dying alone in a dark library and this in turn makes ezio reevaluate his life choices…. except. he doesn’t? neglect? his family? or whatever? like, his devotion to the assassins is sort of painted as this tragic flaw that leads to a lonely death bc it supposedly comes at the cost of his family, but… his wife has joined the assassins, (at least) one of his sons is in the brotherhood and even when he goes to protect the assassins against the mongols, he takes his family with him (except for the son who stays behind bc he has a family of his own and who, ironically, ends up dying bc of that)… like, you can’t describe altaïr as a good husband and father in the database and have his son tell him that "everything that is good in me began with you, father" when they say goodbye, and then want to make us believe that he put his family behind the brotherhood and that that is a character flaw that leads to his tragedy.

because you HAVE to have a character’s tragedy be the result of a character flaw. like. that is how tragedies work. otherwise it just becomes tragedy for the sake of tragedy which is… boring bc it has no purpose. and we know it is SUPPOSED to have purpose bc ezIO FUCKING QUITS BEING AN ASSASSIN AFTER WITNESSING IT!

it’s like they want to have their cake and eat it, too — they didn’t want to actually make altaïr a bad husband/father, but still wanted to make his life a tragedy where he loses his family which is why instead they outsource all responsibility to abbas who now has to be the reason for ALL the deaths.

like, they try to make at least maria’s death kind of sort of the result of altaïr’s rashness or whatever but like… these guys KILLED THEIR SON and TOLD HIM THAT ALTAÏR HAD ORDERED HIS DEATH. like, altaïr losing it in response to that is not rash, it’s fucking logical and justified! if anything the scene made me angry at maria for trying to stop him. like, GIRL, he was YOUR son too??? but god forbid we give female characters actual real emotions, she has to fill the role of "voice of reason who dies for altaïr’s man pain" i fucking guess.

like, it’s this weird mix where his tragedy is simultaneously painted as his own fault but also not really bc abbas is the one responsible for all the shit that happens. it just… it just doesn’t really go together.

the only way to make his story make sense narratively and to give it actual purpose is by looking at it in the context of ezio’s story, bc the things he sees in altaïr’s memories are supposed to be a revelation (ha!) to ezio specifically. and i guess that’s maybe the crux of it all — altaïr’s story in revelations was conceived of first and foremost to support ezio’s story and development. which is probably also why many people maybe don’t notice bc, having skipped ac1 and started with ac2, the majority of people mostly care only about ezio and only really appreciate altaïr’s story in as far as it serves to push ezio forward. (tho i’ve also seen a few people say that ezio is also written kind of weird in rev, but i’ve never really been an ezio girly myself so i can’t speak to the truth of that)

like, altaïr dying alone in the library doesn’t really have to make sense for his character, i guess, bc it’s only really supposed to be a cautionary tale for ezio.

so, i guess, for once, they actually had a MAN dying for another man’s character development, which is pretty woke actually. ubisoft, i take everything back jksdsfjhgdsahfhsdhfghfdsgjhsdgjh

[cheapshrimpysheep]

CONGRATS FOR YOUR MILESTONE!!! I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! And you're one out of the only 5 twst/om writing blogs I have notifs on for, your writing and blog aesthetic makes me so happy!!!

For a request, could you write Kalim sparring with a reader who's a good fighter? It's my personal hc that Kalim can throw a punch of two due to Jamil drilling various self defense techniques into his head. But the whole sparring thing is very lighthearted and fun, since Kalim is not really interested in fighting anyone (especially the person he has a crush on, wink wink 👀) and his fighting partner is not interested in hurting him either. Everything just turns into them being silly and getting into a tickle fight instead or something.

If it's not something in your comfort zone, that's okay! I still wanted to drop by and congratulate you for your hard work. Requests or no requests, writing is content that deserves to be praised and celebrated to thank you! Sorry for the long ask erifidnwyrkd ~ray

COMMENTS: THANK YOU! 💖 I'm always so happy when people tell me they like what I write that much. That's why I love writing this. This is where I feel most appreciated. 🥰

In fact, I am a coward. 😅 So I'm not very familiar with knowing how to fight. But still, I hope I got around it well. As you can see from the number of words, I ended up having fun writing it. I hope you and all have fun reading it too. 😉

CHARACTERS: Kalim Al-Asim x Reader

TAGS: Fluff; GN Reader

WORD COUNT: 1.150 words

CONTEXT: Jamil and Kalim used to train from time to time. One way for Jamil to guarantee that, in an emergency, where he wasn't present, Kalim would have any chance of defending himself and escaping or something like that.

But that day, due to some complication at the basketball club, Jamil couldn't train with Kalim. However, he remembers that he already saw you defending yourself against some NRC students, and thinks you might be a good replacement. And maybe, in a way, it would be an interesting idea to have Kalim fight against you, knowing that he has a crush on you.

So, he calls you and asks you for this favor, and assured you that he would somehow repay you.

You arrive in Scarabia, without Grim. He knew that in Scarabia they liked to have banquets from time to time and he loves to eat. But Jamil wasn't there to cook a feast and probably most of the food he would get is the food that Kalim likes to shove down his throat. So he decided he would be better off with just tuna in Ramshackle.

You've just walked through the front door when...

“HIIIIIIII!” Kalim greets you, while running towards you. He has the cutest smile on his face. “How was your day? Do you want to eat anything? Jamil left some really good things in the fridge.”

You tell him that you already ate some time ago, so you would be ready to train with him as soon as you arrived in Scarabia.

“Train? Train what? AH! Is there a test I forgot?!”

You say no and ask if Jamil hadn't told you what he had told you.

“Oh! That. Ha ha HA HA! Sorry, I guess I got so excited when he told me you were coming that I forgot to pay attention to the rest of the conversation. Hum... Don't tell him that, pleeease.”

You promise you won't say anything and he thanks you with an appreciative smile. You remember that Jamil had said that he had left some papers with instructions for training somewhere. When you ask Kalim about this, he doesn't know where they are, but he can guess by knowing Jamil. Or maybe Jamil only knew where to put them because he knew Kalim would forget.

You see the papers and as you would expect, they are all self-defense techniques, where you would be Kalim's aggressor. Techniques for him to defend himself from punches, knives, being grabbed by the arm, neck, etc. You didn't like the idea of even pretending to attack Kalim, but it was the instructions and it was for his own good. Right?

“Can I see the papers?” Kalim asks you when he sees the slight discomfort in your expression. You hand him the papers, he takes a look at them and smiles. “Ah, the same as always. Don't worry, this seems to be just a review. Jamil does this a lot since he says I'm very forgetful. It's okay. Nothing very difficult. You just have to pretend to attack me.” But your discomfort doesn't leave your face. “Hum? What's wrong? You're not feeling well?”

You tell him that you don't want to hurt him and that you don't really like the idea of attacking him, even if it's just pretending.

“I don't want to hurt you either. Not even Jamil, despite what he tells me to do. But we don't need to do this training like the ones I do with Jamil, right? I really hope not, otherwise I'm going to lose all the rounds.” He says with a slightly embarrassed smile. You ask why. “Because like I said, I don't want to hurt you, so I think I'll end up letting you win every time. Ha ha. AH! That's it! Why don't we play fight? Some of my siblings like to do it. We don't need to take this so seriously, we can just have fun. Right? What do you think?”

You think about it and agree. And both of you also agree that it's okay as long as Jamil doesn't get upset. Or finds out.

The "training" started normally. But it was when he got to the part of training to defend himself from knives that Kalim had an idea. He went to get one of those thick markers, took off the cap and said: “You know paintball right? The goal is not to get hit by the paint. Why don't we try to do something like that?” He hands you the marker. He removes his coat and other accessories from his torso until only his white shirt remains. “You're going to try to paint me and I have to dodge it. It'll be fun, you'll see.” he says with a big amused smile.

You ask if he doesn't think Jamil will be upset with him for ruining his shirt.

“Maybe, but don't worry, I can buy lots more where this one came from. Ha ha ha.”

He was right, that was fun. You forgot that you were training self-defence and looked more like a couple playing. At one point, Kalim managed to grab your wrist and steal your marker. And he looked at you with that rare mischievous smile of his. “My turn!”

You seemed surprised. What does he mean his turn? Weren't you the attacker? But then he looks at you and straightens up.

“Oh. You should take off your coat first. I'll get a better see if I catch you with the marker on your white shirt.” You hesitate. You don't have many shirts like that. “If I ruin the shirt I can buy you a new one, or two, or as many as you want. No problem!... Pleeease? I'm having so much fun with you!” He's making puppy eyes.

You agree and take off your coat and accessories. You continue that "training" until there comes a time when both of you have kind of given up on defending yourselves and are already covered in paint streaks on your shirts, arms and even your face. You realize you dropped the marker and can't find it.

“You lose your weapon?” Kalim says “Well, it looks like there's now only one way to find out who wins.” And he attacks you with tickles. “Surrender!”

You try to resist, but end up really surrendering. Kalim was too good at tickling. And as soon as you know it, the two of you were on the floor, practically hugging each other. He smiles affectionately at you.

“I wish you were in Scarabia. We could have fun like this every day. I could see you and be with you every day for much longer.”

Your noses were almost touching when Jamil appears and drops his training bag to make a noise that would get both of your attention. He looked bothered. “WHAT?! Why are you two-? OH, for the patience of the great seven.” he sighs.

If you dropped in here out of the blue and want to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

[sophieinwonderland]

"They're Hellenists now?!"

I love the title here, and how this r/systemscringe member is freaked out that systems do, in fact, exist in all religions!

That's right! Nowhere is safe from us!

Yes dear, people do tend to talk differently in spaces where they can be anonymous and not have their lives and reputations be ruined due to rampant ableism. The fact that many systems would be afraid to say this aloud because of social consequences, including losing support from friends, family, and possibly even their employment is really not the slam dunk you think it is.

I don't know why I keep reading takes from these subreddits when they all make me lose braincells every time.

First, seeing yourselves as separate people is fine. Healthy multiplicity is a valid goal.

But even if it wasn't and you take the outdated view that you need to see yourselves as one person in order to heal, people do counterproductive things all the time.

"Real people wouldn't do this because it's counterproductive" is the biggest indicator that you have somehow managed to go through your whole life without ever interacting with even one single real person. Because if you ever had, you would know better!

I know it's hard for you people, but please at least try to use your brains for once!

It's only one alter who wants to practice, so it would feel dishonest to claim they themselves, as the alter writing that post, was a follower of Artemis. It's likely they have a different religion.

Again though, this is an anonymous account.

And more importantly, people with DID... and I know this is a shock to r/systemscringe... ARE HUMAN BEINGS!!!

They are not a monolith, and even if some are reluctant to come out as having DID in public, it's pretty absurd to think they all will.

And it being a covert disorder doesn't mean that nobody with the disorder will ever talk about it. It means that it can be hard to detect given that amnesia can make switching hard to remember, and a lot of the experiences in it are internal. If someone with DID doesn't tell you, there's a good chance you wouldn't know. From the outside, they might just seem forgetful, and to change moods a lot.

The disorder being covert doesn't give you an excuse to fakeclaim anyone who talks about having it!

It's infuriating that r/systemscringe's standards for fakeclaiming is literally just... saying that you have a disorder...

And one final point is that for the people who are ashamed and won't talk about it, the reason for this is because of people like those on r/systemscringe who will treat them like they're either lying, crazy, OR BOTH! And the way to fight shame and normalize talking about DID and OSDD is to be brave, take risks, and talk about having them in places that aren't just about those disorders.

So congrats to that one user who went and spoke about their alters in the Hellenism subreddit. It's only a small step forward, but progress will be made by a million small steps like this one.

[bondoes-art]

First night at Freddy's spoilers!

So uh... How we feeling?

I loved it, even if their computer was being a pain. AJ whipped out the chainsaw, normal RE things.

Mike and Lizzy, supportive siblings! Look at them go! It was kind of sad seeing her constantly calling the police to see if there was more info, and when that didn't work she got a job and a conspiracy board.

Matt being murderous business manager per usual, calling up 'MadPat' I loved the little call to his ego name that people decided on.

(Completely off topic, but let it be known I despise the fact that Casey's voice for Glitchtrap without the filter would totally work for my boy Ruthless, which I love and hate because now my brain wants me to animate the man to Glitchtrap lines)

"A little overtime never killed anyone." Bonnie no-

The ending, oh boy the ending. Baby driving in and running over Glitchtrap, allowing Lizzy to finish the job. Poor Baby got ptsd, though to be fair the cut of Lizzy with the drill probably would've freaked me out a bit if I was in her shoes. Then Baby was gonna attack her despite the animatronic's protests. Let's just say the blood(?) effects on that were phenomenal, but it was really sad. "Don't take me back there."

And Glitchtrap at the end, oh boy. It all seemed like it was going to be okay, Lizzy and the animatronic's made it through. They all leave right away except Lizzy, and then suprise Glitchtrap is not dead. He shocks the poor girl then blows the both up with Matt's weird plug in bomb.

The poor animatronics, they were so excited to leave with her and then the building blows up behind them. Never have I thought I'd feel such sorrow behind little plastic eyes. Nothing changed but they looked so sad.

And calling up poor Nate. Xander did a wonderful job on Freddy's lines there, I could feel the tears in his voice. I wanted to give poor tiny bear man a hug. They all just lost everything.

I started crying as the credits rolled. I also did at the end of Virus because the finality of it all hit me like a truck. The blooper clips from both the original and prequel, blurick07 art (congrats on that if you're reading this holy shit), the slowed revamp of Baby I Love You. You can't do that too me.

Fnaftm had been a part of my whole childhood, and the fact that it's all come to an end and I'm going to be an adult this coming July it's all kind of bittersweet. It's over, all in the most gorgeous movie.

It's gonna be hard to move on but I wish RE well in whatever comes next, fnaf or not.

I'm totally going to be making art at some point. I still wanna hug the little furry babies. :(

[ilythena]

·˚ ₊˚ 𝐌𝐲 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤!

🎵 Gherbo - friends & foes.

Sum. ᯤ Being the blue lock characters pretty ass gf.

Char. ⩩ Nagi Seishiro, Reo Mikage, Bachira Meguru PT 2. - Rin Itoshi, Chigiri Hyoma, Isagi Yoichi.

Tags. ⌯ People (it’s actually bachira) hitting on you, you’re an it girl, bad ass bitch frl, kinda crack

𝐍𝐀𝐆𝐈 𝐒𝐄𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐎 (なぎせいしろ)

“Where is nagi at?” You mumble, standing on the sidewalk, looking down at your phone to look less awkward to strangers. You’re so hypnotized by your phone you don’t see him and his team walking down. “That girl over there is super pretty.” “She looks really familiar?” Isagi and reo say as they glance at you.

Nagi turns his head to where they’re looking to see you and he smiles. “That’s my girlfriend.” He says and reo laughs, nagi looks him up and down in a ‘the fuck is so funny’ type of way. Reo catches this and scoffs, “no way you’re pulling her.” Kunigami says and as if it was on cue, you hear him and see nagi from across the street. You smile and wave to nagi and he waves you over, reo is shocked. Isagi’s mouth is wide open and he cannot believe it. You walk over saying hello to everyone and clinging to your boyfriends arm and he’s glaring at the whole damn team at this point

“Did he force you to date him? Is this a joke? Nagi got a girlfriend before me?! I’m gonna faint.” Bachira says as he holds onto Isagi and puts a hand on his forehead. You laugh hard and nagi frowns at you mumbling a “how’s that funny?”, Isagi is still standing there in complete shock. “Y-you’re y/n! The one who won the woman’s high school soccer championship in kanagawa! No way!” Isagi says and he’s about to faint literally.

“Y’all just mad I get more action then y’all.” He replies and drags you away from them, your smiling and yelling a “bye! Hopefully I’ll see you all around!” And Bachira is yelling “bring her back!” To nagi.

𝐑𝐄𝐎 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐆𝐄 (レオみかげ)

“Reooo! Wait up” you whine, and reo chuckles and slows down a little for you to catch up. You both walk through the doors of the school and immediately all eyes are on the two of you, people staring and mumbling— it honestly scares you a little. You both walk to class and you think something is wrong. Why was everyone looking?

It’s the first time anyone’s ever seen you since you’re new to the school, and you’re nervous beyond belief.

Class goes by and reo pulls you aside as soon as it’s over. “What’s wrong? You look upset.” “Why is everyone staring at us?” Before reo can respond a tall boy with white hair walks over and talks before him. “Are you and reo dating?” Straight to the point. You nod and he smiles, pats reo on the back with a “congrats” and leaves without another word.

Confusion is written all over your face and reo laughs and says “that’s nagi. I’ll introduce you to him one day, but I was gonna say they’re looking bec-“ cut off once again, this time by some random girl, she shoves a camera in your face and smiles “Reo Mikage’s girlfriend! The brand new school sensation. Everyone is fawning over how beautiful she is! What’s your name and how do you feel about all the support and compliments you’ve been getting on the school page?”

Reo sighs and excuses the both of you and drags you outside, everyone smiling at the both of you and suddenly it makes sense. Everyone’s looking because you two are dating and they want to know who exactly you are. Nosy. As you pass groups of people you hear them mumbling “it’s no surprise reo got the prettiest girl here. It is reo mikage.” “They’re both so cute. I don’t know if I want to be reo or be with reo.” “Reo better watch out, cause if they break up I’m going for her first thing!”

You smile as he drags you down the hall and laugh. He sees and smiles as well, happy you finally understood and aren’t upset anymore.

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐀 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔 (ばちらめぐる)

Logging on to Instagram, you read through the comments of your recent post.

Isagiyoichi: ❤️

User26774: 😍😍😍

^chigirihyoma_: Bachira we know this is u come to practice ugly.

S3ishir0: Nobody Doing it Like y/n ig….

^y/nsthebest: fym “ig…” 🤨

Thebestmikage: WHATS 4+4?

^rensuke50: ATE!

You laugh at your friends comments and get dressed to go through the day. Walking to the soccer practice you smile and yell “heyyy!” To everyone and everyone yells hey back, but nobody was as loud as Bachira. He stops everything he’s doing to run over to you and hug you despite how sweaty he is.

“You’re sweaty bachi’” you whine, and push him off of you because you don’t want him to ruin your clothes. Chigiri yells “Bachira come here and finish practice! We’re almost done.” “Wanna spend time with the light of my life” and nagi fake throws up in the corner. “We know y/n would never go for you Bachira give it up! She really want me instead” reo jokes, and Bachira takes a random shoe and throws it at him.

Reo chases Bachira and kunigami screams “my shoe! I spent money on that shit you know!” You laugh and Isagi kicks you out because apparently you’re too much of a distraction for the team (Bachira.)

You spend the rest of the day home and hear loud knocks on your door. Who else would it be? Bachira shoves his way into your home and flops on top of you on the couch. “They’re bullies” he fake cries and you stroke his hair and laugh. “My poor Bachi.” You kiss his forehead and he hums into your chest.

You take out your phone and snap a picture of him on you and post it on your story, adding a text saying “@bachiraluvsy/n the best bf” and post it. You put the phone down and silence it, only wanting to focus on your boyfriend for the rest of the day.

Notification Center:

2 hours ago

Reo <3: Y/N ARE U FR.

Reo <3: I LOST TO BACHIRA?

Nagi :x: LMFAOOOO REO MAD AS SHIT RN

Nagi :x: *attachment: 1 image*

[chipchopclipclop]

i have finished death mark 2...... thoughts.....

general thoughts is the overall story was.... BAD. LOL.

I'll start with the good. The interactions between Yashiki and alot of the returning cast i really liked, the writing especially in the first few chapters. An example being alot of Yashiki and Daimon's chatter, especially the whole weight of saving lives things that comes back at the end, alot of it was quite sweet and heartwarming similarly between him and other mark bearer characters.

^^^ BEST CG EVARRRRR....

I liked the choice of Hiroo and Mashita being the two that come in when he's at his lowest, their curtness and refusal to take his attitude was really refreshing, felt really like what he needed at the time lol. In that same vein i enjoyed his characterization alot in the early-mid game, and how it develops. He's such a sensitive guy lollll and it comes through well with how much he cares but near the latter chapters it kind of.... sours.

Though there were a few new characters i liked his interactions with, Abe and Maruhashi specifically i found endearing of the new cast, Alot of them just Die. Or theyre Hime and Michiho AKA the bane of my fucking existence with this game.

They are the two pushed front and center and it is truly its worst aspect, as characters they're shallow personality wise and though you could say that about others in the cast, them being in love with Yashiki on top of it makes it so much worse.

They barely have any scenes where they actually properly interact and feel like they bond at all but for some reason im expected to believe they're suddenly in love with him?? -and in the end they were also dead the whole time, and not even themselves. So it wasn't even real, and somehow any of this is meant to hold any weight to the audience...?? explaining it as the ghosts being desperate for him instead doesnt really make it.. any more compelling (lol the scene at the end where hes like maybe they just wanted those beautiful normal school days they spent by me.... when did that happen yashiki)

I understand Yashiki is probably saddened by the deaths of two young girls but they're treated with so much more weight and gravitas than anyone else in the cast and its so unearned, especially when alot of the other ghosts are somehow way more compelling in that aspect.

He also becomes borderline ooc around them like in what world am i expected to believe he emotionally dumps his burdens on the two highschool girls he barely knows because of how sad he is when hes got like how many other people he knows FROM THE OTHER GAMES he could do that with...????? (AND BASICALLY DOES... ALREADY...?) and it lifts his heart like truly wtf was i reading. HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT.JPG

Chapter six is really where it falls off the cliff with this, after hanging out with Hiroo, Mashita and Yasuoka and solving that case they just dissapear from the narrative for a day so he can......... hang out with michiho...?? i couldn't even enjoy murder yashiki in this game because of how ludicrous it felt that the rest of yashiki's companions just dissapeared to make it happen, and no one calls or anything lmfao. I cant imagine how much more compelled i would have felt if he was dealing with that situation with any of the other three around instead of HIME. LIKE I AM ACTUALLY SO INCENSED ABOUT THIS SCENARIO BEING RUINED SO HARD WHEN IT COULD BE SO GOOD BUT I DIGRESS (RIPPING MY HAIR OUT) (CRYING BC I LOVE BLOOD AND HORROR)

Even the first two games weren't as bad as writing women as this!? EVEN IF I HAD TO SEE MASSIVE TITS ON SCREEN THEY WEREN'T TRYING TO JUMP ON YASHIKI AS WELL AS A CENTRAL PLOT POINT (lol kakuya) congrats exp you have outdone yourself with the misogyny.

To continue on the topic of new characters, it feels like so many of them were given so little screen time to make you actually care about them. For how prominent Abe is he barely actually does anything, and Maruhashi instantly dissapears when shes no longer a red herring. On top of this game basically killing off any other character that appears, its hard to get invested in them as characters at all.

You have no opportunities to actually effect their fate as you do in the other two games, so there's even less attempt to immerse you there. Horikoshi comes the closest behind the other two but its because her case with Hanako was easily the strongest and most resonant of the game (lgbt win). Its not even like this is the first time Yashiki saves the lives of kids and bonds with them after, especially with the caveat of being a teacher, like how did you fuck this premise up so bad.

They either needed to commit to more scenes and writing in general to attach you to the new characters or just not have any returning ones show up so prominently if they're not also going to further interact with them.

The overall mystery suffers for it, and while i like the twist of the doll being helpful in this game actually, it is so easy to guess michiho and hime are the departed, and i already didn't even like them so it doesn't hit at all emotionally. Like, i was not feeling very betrayed or anything lol.

Further critiques -> though running around is very fun, the horror in this game really didn't at all compare to the others with the loss of that first person perspective for alot of the exploration, sad.

I also feel like we got more horny shit than we did in NG which is also like lol one step forwards two steps back. Even the gore wasn't as good............... kind of mid in every regard there. I did like the mushroom and scissor stuff, but the bugs and mold ended up just kind of ..... eh...

Mary continues to be the best antag in these games, she slayed and she continues to keep slaying. The sisters were really kind of a letdown in the end, especially since i think i could have enjoyed it if they pulled them off better.

As for my yaoi cocaine score though thats a 10/10 they made yashiki and mashita meow and hiss like cats in this game for some reason, i genuinely think that shattered my mind a little.

I also can't believe they gave us these two panting in unison asmr as well so you could make your own [REDACTED] if you wanted. The departed getting jealous mashita was standing next to him in that one confrontation too like she's calling him a homewrecker..... lol...... also the part where mashita jokes abt him keeping the gun and if you make yashiki go 'then i will 😇' and him immediately backpedaling like okay i was kidding. give it back. very moe very powerful.

I feel like the entire time mashita was on screen he was basically acting as yashiki's brain to keep him from getting too lost in his emotional attachments, truly everyone needs a bitch wife to keep them sane.

TL:DR this game could be so good (average) if it wasn't so fucking badDDDDDDDDDDDD easily the worst entry in this series...... dont buy it unless its on sale for 4 bucks (this applies to every game) or just watch in on youtube lol.

anyway. beautiful yashiki collection. I CANT BELIEVE MASHITA DIDNT GET A BAD END CG ACTUALLY < / 3 BUT YASHIKI'S IS REALLY GOOD < / 3 SMALL WINS < / 3

[vaguely-concerned]

A short comic about the night Sophia Amell became Irving's apprentice.

CW: Suicide attempt, self harm, blood

*

And this is why for a large section of her life, Sophia would do pretty much anything for Irving without hesitation lol. He was exactly the adult she needed in the exact moment she needed him to be, and that kind of thing puts down deep roots in a person. More context/headcanon stuff behind the read-more! It mentions some mental illness stuff but nothing too in-depth.

Sophia was always a talented student, but as she closed in on her teens and started to come into her magical power truly, some stuff started going very, very wrong inside her. (She’s around thirteen in this comic.) Part of that was down to purely mundane untreated mental illness setting in, as it is wont to do and especially in one’s teens, and also the day-to-day fuckery of living in an environment like the Circle system. But a big component of it was also the relentless and seemingly unending way her magical potential kept unfolding, until there seemed to be no room left inside her for anything but the electrical storm intensity suffusing everything in her mind and her life. It became almost impossible to focus on anything else through the sound and fury of it. None of the techniques she’d been taught were enough to keep her centered or stop her from dissolving into the violence of potential screaming out through every cell of her body. The Bad Times were here and they meant to stay.  

Whatever stuff our souls are made of, hers naturally conducts magic like a motherfucker, helplessly, without pause or relief. She’s a relentlessly humming live wire of magic with no off switch. The Fade is constantly like ‘wow. Wish I could fucking live directly inside of her bloodstream that’d be neat too bad about this Veil thing getting in the way’. This is significantly less cool and more shitty than it sounds like to live with day to day, and doubly so in the Circle — on one hand potential phenomenal cosmic power, sure, on the other: congrats, you are an unceasing whole-person wandering magical tension headache from trying to contain said phenomenal cosmic power (which will absolutely wreck you and everyone around you if you lose control of it for a moment btw). and also there are Templars watching your every step. Don’t slip up ahaha. 

(Aside from any political or image reasons (and initially some deep seated respectability politics too lol), I think this is partially why Sophia has next to no interest in blood magic — Maker help her, her trouble does not lie in a lack of available power haha, it’s in trying to keep her act-of-god levels of available power focused and contained enough to not get fucking blown away by the recoil and leave nothing but a miserably smoking crater around her.) 

She was a straight As, teacher’s pet, never any problem to anyone student, which spelled exactly as much catastrophe for her as you’d suspect. Her only friend was Jowan, whose oblivious self-absorption would be almost cruel if it weren’t so hilariously real and unstudied lmao. (There’s some lingering if largely one-sided in that dimension resentment in that relationship all the way into DA:O. Catastrophic sibling event long before Jowan even realized it lol) No one could see what was happening, and even if she could have found the right words to do so she was so scared of telling anyone that she felt like she was losing control — she’s been told all her life that that’s the Worst sin a mage can commit, and she internalized that good and proper and was so ashamed that she was falling short. 

As these things do in the dark, her desperation and loneliness festered into true despair and hopelessness, which culminated in the night of this comic, hidden away in the most isolated and out of the way corner of the tower she could find. Thank the Maker for Irving, or there would have been no Hero of Ferelden in this timeline.

After he’d stopped the bleeding and covered up the blood well enough that they wouldn’t be stopped if spotted in the hallways, Irving brought her to his office — she was still half-sure she was in soooo much fucking trouble, but actually once they were sat down he just went ‘For formality’s sake I had thought to hold off on this until next year so you might finish your basic studies first. Under the circumstances, though, I think it better to broach the subject now’ and asked her to become his apprentice. 

(When Alistair asks her about it eventually, having spotted the very faint scar that remains on her arm when the light fell just right to reveal it, Sophia tells him: “I was… very confused that night, and he was very kind. I owe him everything you owe Duncan, and more,” and that is basically how she thinks about it for a long time. Irving’s side of that is slightly different, as I’ve tried to outline elsewhere — he doesn’t think she owes him anything, if anything I think he still feels awful he didn’t see how bad it was back then until it was almost too late and is still making up for that in any way he can — but the parental love is very much there on his side too. The way he keeps pushing his luck before Amell/Surana’s Harrowing to give them all the advice and support Greagoir will let him get away with??? Yeah. That’s his baby.)

With Irving’s direct guidance and support and attention to stabilize her, she found better ways to cope and learned to channel her magic into small, practical purposes when it felt like it would brim over in her veins and tear her apart. (When stressed out or agitated, she’ll still reflexively and methodically trace out glyphs to calm herself down haha.)

While all those strategies helped take the worst edge off and left her more or less functioning, I think Irving saw that long-term it wouldn’t be enough, and thus… his plan to send her to the Grey Wardens, where she regularly gets to go off like a live grenade at the one target that’s universally deemed morally and socially acceptable (i.e. the darkspawn). Irving you son of a bitch you did it, you got that girl to adulthood and beyond not only alive but still some definition of sane… and, eventually, even happy. You pulled it off again you machiavellian old fox (too bad about the jowan-shaped collateral damage along the way I suppose but hey. Eggs and omelets right. right.) 

(If the Wardens didn’t come along as conveniently as they did, he might have tried to get her into the King’s army instead, probably. Anything to get her out of the tower, because he — probably rightfully — thinks staying cooped up there really might have killed her in the end. And he’s her dad and can’t accept that.) 

Anyway Sophia is partially my way of playing around with the in-game dynamics of just how wildly, unreasonably OP a mage warden can be by the end of the game, especially through awakening. She was a gifted child, near-fatally so, and from whence most of her character springs. What more can I say. Also wow. Apologies for the parenthesis bonanza, that’s just where my brain is at right now I canot chancge this fhdskja

[gor3sigil]

hi i dont really know how to introduce myself, so i hope you dont mind if i skip that part.

i just wanted to ask about that post you made a few days ago. in one of the last paragraphs you mention how hatching is painful. but is it supposed to feel like my entire world is cracking apart around me?

what you mentioned in the beginning of the post, about how the people around you felt about masculinity, that very aptly describes a lot of my fears of reactions to me identifying as masculine, which is what started me crying and ultimately spurred me to message you.

im just so scared

i have lots of trans people in my life, i just dont know how to talk about this with most of them (see: Very Scary :C) ive spent my whole life using femininity to take down peoples walls and help them feel comfortable around me. what the hell am i supposed to do as man? can i even still behave that way? will people even still trust me? will they like me? will they feel safe around me? its unbearable. every time i think about it my brain tries to run away, there's just so much fear.

is this normal at all? to be scared like this? i mean, considering i too struggle with the radical feminist narrative you mentioned? i dont believe the narrative, but i fear it. and then i get insecure and i cant stop thinking the insecurity an indication that manhood is the wrong direction for me.

am i making any sense?

Hi, it must've taken lots of strength to write all this so congrats to you. My answer will be based on my own experiences so take it with a grains of salt. Yeah, your world will definitely shatter too. Because even if you're just socially transitionning, if you do so while being surrounded by trans friends, most of them will change the way they percieve you so your interactions may change. I know that's scary, but you have to trust the process. If they're good friends, they won't like you less or anything. That's the hardest part I think. As you read in my post, coming ot made me lose tons of friends, most of them trans, because they treated me badly after I came out.

And yes, you are making sense. I went through the exact same fears as you. The fear of not being deemed as safe anymore. Unfortunately, I don't really have any solutions to offer you, appart from building your own community, online and/or IRL. Like I said, most of my trans friends were kinda crappy about me being masc and I struggled for years to feel comfortable in my masculinity as a result. Because I did the same as you, me being a "woman" was my way of saying that I understood the struggles of others and was safe. Let me stress one thing. You are still okay, you're not a bad person. Even if you discover new things about yourself, even if you're transmasc, even if you're transitionning (if you do), you are still very much the same person as before, with your understanding of a number of issues, with your own pas experiences.

It's a point I really can't stress enough. As I said in my post, you are still worthy of love, support, tenderness, being understood, being heard, being listened to, being comforted. One thing I noticed is that my previous friend tended to dismiss my feelings and/or be "rough" with me thinking that it was "affirming" because I was a man now. Let me tell you that that's BS and don't let anyone treat you this way.

Maybe try to test the water, idk if you came out already or not but maybe in your presentation or just by talking about transmasc specific issues with them, see how they react. That being said, I really do hope that your friends will be understanding. Or that by explaining to them how their behavior is wrong they will understand and act differently, because sometimes people so shit cause they don't know any better. I hope this helps, and I really wish you all the best. If you ever need to talk feel free to reach out again. Take care.

[revalition]

HELLO!!! congrats on finishing the intellect skills!!! :D!! this ask is your free pass to share any INT quotes you didn't get to share this week >:3!!! i would LOVE to read all of your cool quotes!!! <33 (if you have more than can fit in this ask i CAN AND WILL SEND YOU ANOTHER if you want me to!! hkjg <333)

hello voli!! ooh... I like this. You also get my not-asked-for comments on them, yay!

fair warning that most of these are probably 'less good' quotes since i had to pick and choose the ones I liked best to put in the posts. but. anyway.

making a cut here because it's gonna be loooong

lots of Logic ones! he has the most passives of all the skills so...

hehe logic won't let you mess up some important stuff!

this second one, Kim will stop you. And if Kim's not there, Reaction Speed will stop you (easy). And if RS doesn't fire, Logic stops you haha.

he gets so excited! very rarely!

go go logic deny it!

big one, but I love when so many talk at once. yeah logic, why didnt you think of it?? hmm??

as always, it's you who's dumb! never ever logic

it's endlessly funny to me when the skills ask the others to contribute and then they just... dont show up.

good question...

This one is SO funny. Logic. ily. this is also a Medium check!! I completely missed this one when searching through earlier. I wish fayde could just bomb my computer with all the logic dialogue so I could sift through 80 pages of it, instead of limiting it to 100 results :(

(this shows up if the query is too big - Sorry, all the words from your query were filtered out. Please use less common words, and ones which are longer than 1 letter (partial and mid-word matches count, you see, so searching 'd' would return everything with a 'd' in it, and that's like 53,000 records, you won't want to read all that!) and, like... no, no, you are severely underestimating me. I actually do want to read all that, desperately)

anyway.

Logic passive fails my beloved

is he not creative enough to make something up?? echem, drama, and inland come up with times for him

hghhk the great serotonin jackpot. I'm super normal about electrochemistry. who is NOT an int skill and will have to wait. logic's comment heals your morale!!

ah yes, very normal things for a joyrider to have in their car. ty logic!

his love of jigsaw puzzlessss

what could go wrong??

related:

this is a different check! but thank goodness for these guys and their stupidly brilliant ideas. saved the day in my 1 INT run.

wow! sarcastic logic my beloved. one second before empathy throws moralism at you

mmm, this one isn't super logic focused, but you can't get this dialogue without passing the challenging Logic passive... and it's really interesting.

this is about to get really rambly but I read a story once about if when you die, your soul travels to a timeline where the flow of events was different and you didn't die. But as your life progresses, avoiding death becomes less and less likely... (eg, avoiding death by getting hit by a bus would take you to a very similar timeline. But avoiding death from old age...) and by the end, the world was unrecognizable. It was a bit sad... I wish I could remember what it was called.

This dialogue reminded me of it. Of the improbable futures. A world where you hit that 3% chance on the dice over and over and it slowly changes everything.

anyway!!

if you didn't deduce that the 2mm hole in the world is a baby pale, a Legendary Logic passive can deduce that it's really off that your radio is catching entroponetic crosstalk all the way in Martinaise.

If you deduce the pale in the church, Soona comments that the recording in the electronic doorbell is likely crosstalk, and Kim makes a comment about often getting crosstalk on the police radio as well.

But it doesn't seem like anyone else has come to the same conclusion...

Harry knows a lot more about the pale than he should.

The final rest state for reality.

hustler logic!!

Logic... come on man. this is not helping. The whole dream is so horrible. He's so nonchalant about it too.

Look at this! The variable is called volition tea... Conceptualization imagining the yummy ginger tea for you is so sweet

I love this. Poor Kim...

Thank you Conceptualization. We would be lost without you.

:(((

poor harry

KIM don't take away concy's poetic name!! >:(

I love these twooo.

and that's apparently 30... uhm. I got extra logic and conceptualization ones in at least..?

you can feel free to send another ask if you actually want even more haha

I was supposed to spend tonight assembling volition quotes!!! and then I somehow got sidetracked on this for (checks clock...) 2 hours. oops. but it's okay cause I picked up lots of other great quotes to shove into my giant doc!

ok :) that's it. thank you for the ask!!! hopefully you don't regret asking (though if you do... you should have known better lol)

[bartonbones]

you said to ask no other questions unless it was "what other drabbles do you have about declan lynch" so I must ask: what other drabbles do you have about declan lynch

oh many many many but i fear none of them make. like complete sense devoid of context. and all of them are forgetting 99% of the details of canon. but declan is just so delicious to write and he gets lines stuck in my head 24/7. a lot of them revolve around the intersection of his tummy issues and his intimacy issues becuase i just think it's fun. here is a little one i wrote after reading intermezzo and eating a delicious italian meal

Declan clears his throat. Runs his fingers down the buttons of his starched white shirt. Blinks while he does so, once, short, not long enough to gather his thoughts or tense and then untense his ever-aching jaw. There’s nothing to gather his thoughts about, he thinks, nothing strange or abnormal about your girlfriend of six months asking, politely, as if more curious than concerned, if you are, in fact, slightly anorexic. 

“Slightly?” Declan questions, as if that is the more shocking part of the question. “Can someone be slightly anorexic? Or isn’t everyone?” 

Ashley shrugs. Between them, dessert plates, espresso cups, mascarpone gelato with toasted pistachios, pomegranate seeds, olive oil. Espresso, gone. Gelato, artfully tasted, three spoonfuls, melting potentially from the heat of the place—summer, August, every AC in the tristate area overworked and exhausted, spitting out their last few weeks of cool air—or maybe the candle, lit for ambiance, nice restaurant, Italian, not too fussy, but nice—or maybe the embarrassment, thick and loud, which he tries to smother with wit before he has to kill it with something worse. 

“You waste a lot of food,” she says. 

“Alright, Dad,” he says. 

“It’s not a judgment. Just observation.” 

What about Dad makes her immediately jump to judgment? Her issue, probably. He thinks she grew up without a lot of money, unless that was Ashley, the previous, and not Ashley, the current. Ronan makes fun of this but underestimates the amount of Ashleys born in the early nineties, a trademark era for the name, actually at its peak in 1987, three percent of all female births in the US, he googled it. Ronan did not believe in innocent coincidence.

Declan shifts. Considers taking another bite of gelato just to beleaguer the point, but sees it through: Okay, she’ll say, congrats on one extra bite of ice cream. Did you, like, eat lunch today? Decides just to not bring attention to it. Wonders how this whole thing started if not for attention and now whenever anyone makes a single comment in his direction about it he thinks about maybe killing himself. Remembers that he’s not supposed to think like that anymore, according to the counselor at Henrietta General, Ronan’s arms wrapped in gauze, Declan’s throat wrapped in shame. How am I supposed to fix this? he’d said. He hadn’t been talking to her. He hadn’t meant what she thought he had. Ronan hadn’t done what she thought he did. But, still: be mindful of what you say. Words mean something. Don’t give him any ideas, essentially. But Ronan wasn’t here. 

“Your observing me makes me feel slightly suicidal,” he says. 

Ashley smiles. Tight, indulgent. Over it, maybe, or just really fucking smart, smart enough to know that Declan Lynch’s troubles are not the kind you can fix just by being a sweet, attentive girlfriend, or maybe not at all. 

“I like observing you,” she says, head tilted. “I think you’re very nice to observe.” 

Declan smiles, raises his eyebrows. Notes, with distant pleasure, the empty feeling in his stomach, even after a four course prix fixe, Ashely’s smooth blonde hair and full, pale cheeks. After this, his lips there, or on her shoulder, maybe, hands down her back, knuckles against spine, it’s all one thing to imagine touching her, and then outside, at his condo, in reality, she stands on tip-toes to kiss his jaw and the whole thing goes sideways. 

“Ah,” he says, and is it so hard to tell an ah which is pleasurable and an ah which is suddenly, inexplicably anxious? She reaches her arms, strong and soft, around his shoulders, scrapes her nails down the back of his neck. He tries to shift in a way that seems normal, leans back against the door like he’s relaxing, except feeling the cool glass of the door, thinking of Matthew—who is at Aglionby, but also in bed, right now, inside, could wake up, could want water or a story, could come out, could see this, Ashley’s hands now toying at the buttons of his shirt, lips crashing against his. 

“Ashley,” he says, urgent in a way he hopes just sounds aroused. He laughs, self-conscious, his body feels like it’s on fire. He doesn’t want to think about this. Too much attention spoils him, there’s such a thing as too close, too kept, too loved, he knows that, nevermind how. “Ashley, love, I—” 

Her mouth moves lower, past the buttons she’s undoing. It’s all very public, even though the hedges cover most of them, and it’s late for the DC business crowd on a Thursday night, all the lights off in the windows surrounding. He’s sweating like they’re in floodlights. 

The empty feeling in his stomach becomes ravenous, so hungry he’s nauseous. How to tell your girlfriend to stop making out with you? How to tell her to stop buying you croissants when she brings coffee, an extra box of whoppers at the movies, half a sandwich when meeting for lunch? How to tell your girlfriend to stop paying attention to you? 

“Ashley,” he says, again, voice cracking. Again and again, as if to remind himself who was in front of him. “I want to break up with you.”

[solitaireships]

Under the Mistletoe

Merry Christmas! This fic was written as a Secret Santa gift for @fatiguedshipper, who requested something about her and her partner, Jason! This is basically just a bunch of Christmas fluff, but I hope that you like it! I have a couple of little self indulgent easter eggs too, so congrats to anyone who manages to figure out what they are. And thank you to @sellkiie for running this event!

Rating: Gen

Genre: Fluff

Words: 1218 words

Divider by strangergraphics

Winters in Gotham are often harsh. Practically the moment the calendar turns to December first, the city is blanketed in a layer of snow. It’s a beautiful sight, as long as you’re not stuck in the traffic the snow always brings with it. The roads get slippery and impossible to navigate between all the snow and ice, and that only makes getting through the city even more chaotic than it usually is. But luckily for Layla, today she’s not out and about. Gotham University is out for their winter break, which gives her the perfect opportunity to enjoy the view of the snow that seems to perpetually fall outside. 

It’s a much nicer view when you’re not having to navigate your way through the cold. And it’s an even better view when paired with the decorations in her and Jason’s apartment. The fireplace bathes the whole living room in its warm glow, stockings lined up along the mantle. The Christmas tree decorated with ornaments and tinsel is another nice touch that brings a bit more light into the room, some of the lights glinting off the shiny wrapping paper of the presents gathered under the tree.

Layla’s glad too that she had help from Jason getting everything set up. She doubts that things would have come out as nicely as they did without his help. He was able to help out with the heavy lifting that she would have struggled with on her own, and it’s nice just to have the man she loves with her for the holiday season. 

Especially since he’s been taking some time off of his work. She knows what he does is important, but still she always worries about how he’s doing. Being Red Hood means he's constantly putting himself in danger, and there's always the worry of him getting hurt. There’s less to worry about now though, while Jason is sitting next to her on the couch, reading a book and drinking some hot cocoa. They’re close enough together that their knees touch, not quite cuddling but close enough to have that steady contact with each other. It’s comforting to be so close with him, and to know for once that he’s completely safe.

“It’s beautiful out there, isn’t it?” Layla asks, looking out to the snow covered street below. For as harsh as the winters may be in Gotham, they’re at least pretty. It’s impressive how much the grime and darkness of the city seems to be transformed by a blanket of snow over it. 

“And cold,” Jason notes, flipping to the next page of his book. 

“Yeah, that tends to happen in winter,” Layla says. She nudges his knee with hers. “We could go out together. I heard they’re going to be doing a Christmas market over on Winick, that sounds like it could be a lot of fun. I bet the lights they’ve got for it are gonna be really pretty.” 

“Not that we’ll be able to see them if we go right now,” he says. 

Jason has a point. It’s a little too early for the city’s Christmas lights to be on, with the sun still bright enough that the lights would barely be visible. 

“Ugh, yeah, true. Maybe we can go out to dinner, then head over to it?” Layla suggests. It has been a while since they’ve been able to, after all. Between her class schedule and everything keeping Jason occupied as Red Hood, it’s hard for them to have both the time and energy needed for a night out. But that’s another benefit of the holidays— for once they don’t have anything else competing for their attention. It can just be the two of them.

“That Italian place on Conway will be good,” Jason replies. 

“Yeah, that sounds nice,” Layla says. 

They’ve only been to that restaurant a couple of times, but it’s the perfect spot for a dinner date. She also can’t help but notice that it’s not too far from where the Christmas market will be— something Jason no doubt took into consideration with the suggestion. They’ll be close enough that they should be able to walk to the market from the restaurant, and Layla’s pretty sure that it shouldn’t tire her out too much. 

It'll be a nice evening out. Still, she wishes that she could do something in the spirit of Christmas with Jason now. And as she looks towards the doorway leading to the kitchen, an idea strikes her. Jason was the one who had to put the mistletoe up at the start of the month— he’s tall enough that he could reach the doorway even without a step stool. They exchanged a couple of kisses beneath it when they first got it set up, but since then have mainly been too busy running from place to place to really enjoy it. 

Now, though, they don’t have anywhere else to be. They can steal as many moments from each other as they want. 

Layla just has to figure out a way to get him to come under the mistletoe with her. Though as she looks down to her mug of hot chocolate, she sees a good enough excuse to get up. She’s just about out of anything to drink, and they have plenty more in the kitchen. 

“I’ll be right back,” Layla says, getting up from the couch with her mug.

Jason makes a noise of acknowledgement, then getting back to reading his book as she heads into the kitchen. Once she’s there, she puts her mug down on the counter by the hot chocolate supplies. She can get herself a refill later, but for now, she has something more important to do.

Layla makes her way back towards the living room, standing in the doorway. “Jason, can you help me out with something real quick?”

“You can’t get a drink on your own?” he teases, but he gets up anyway, coming to meet her in the doorway. 

When he makes it to the doorway, she takes his hand in hers, smiling up at him. 

“Look what we’re under,” Layla says. 

Jason looks up, eyes landing on the mistletoe before he looks down to her lips. “You planned this, huh?”

“Maybe. But it’s usually traditional for people to kiss under the mistletoe,” Layla says. “So. Kiss me?”

He sighs, but there’s a grin on his face. “I guess since it’s tradition...”

Layla has to get on her tiptoes to reach Jason, wrapping her arms around his shoulders partially to get closer to him and partially to bring him down a little closer to her. There’s a playfulness to the way they kiss, both grinning as their lips meet. Jason places his hands on either of her hips, drawing her flush against him. Layla loves knowing that even though he’s not much for physical contact with most people, he can never seem to get enough of being close to her. They fit together naturally, and there are few places Layla thinks she’d rather be than in his arms. 

When they pull apart, Layla’s feeling breathless and giddy, the touch of his lips still seeming to linger against hers. She smiles up at him. “Merry Christmas, Jason.”

He responds with another kiss, this time to the top of her head. “Merry Christmas.”

[uhohbestie]

Hi! I literally JUST finished reading TAMN and it is easily one of the best scarian fics like. of all time. in my opinion. but for context i binged it for a bit at first and then took a bit of a break for my heart to recover and then came back to finish it off, so i’ve been sort of avoiding discussion about it on here as to not be spoiled until now.

That is to say i’m not sure what questions have already been asked and answered and while i’ve tried to scroll through the asks to check i’m very behind so i apologize if this has already been touched on BUT

Do you ever plan to reveal what happened with Joel, or is that something you plan to leave ambiguous? Or Lizzie? I got so attached to him during his relatively short time in the fic and my god the gunshot scene- Its going to haunt me a little not knowing if he lived or not, but I also fully understand if that’s not a question you intend to answer.

I’m also curious if they ever end up meeting with mumbo (i’m assuming that was the aforementioned “mustache man” because who else) or found pearl, also is Scott alive out there somewhere in this AU? Did Cub survive? I know I’m asking way too many questions and I don’t really expect answers to all of if any of them, but if any extra details are allowed i’d love to hear them.

Regardless thank you so much for writing this fic, it’s clear there was a lot of love poured into it and that was reflected in the absolute emotional rollercoaster it took me on. The world and the characters and the tension was all completely captivating, I felt absorbed in it all in a way I only ever really experience once in a blue moon and it’s something I cherish. This fic is always going to stick with me, and I can tell by all the fan works that have been made that I’m not the only one, so congrats on putting something out there that managed to resonate with so many people. I’m thinking about joining the discord sometime soon, but I need a minute to process the emotions I’m having over making it to the end of this fic now haha. Anyway I didn’t mean to make this into a whole essay, so thank you if you actually take the time to read my rambling, and I hope your pillow is nice and cold for you tonight :)

Aaa thank you SO much, we're both so happy that you enjoyed TAMN!! As long time long-fic readers ourselves, it was so special for us to get to write and share it, and hearing that people enjoyed it as much as they did has given us both SO much happiness. It means a lot!!! <3 <3

As for your questions!!!

Some of them we can answer, and some of then we'd like to keep vague and ambiguous on purpose. I know for a fact that writing Lizzie/Pearl's side-story is something both Key and I are champing at the bit to get to, and we're also very interested in writing some prequel portions of the Redwood compound in their earlier "establishing" phase, while also continuing to explore Scar and Grian's story (both in pre-zombie apocalypse vignettes, and in post-epilogue one-shots). Other parts we don't want to promise because admittedly it's a world that could easily expand infinitely and we are but two lowly writers, and even more is going to be left open-ended on purpose, because it invites people to get creative on their own, and that "oh my gosh, what do you think happened HERE.... do you think maybe....?" is one of the things that got us so invested in fandom and fanfic ourselves in the first place.

Which!!! (shameless segue) brings me to the TAMNcord Discord!!!

Honestly and for true, some great "what if..." conversation occurs there pretty much daily by the incredible people that TAMN has attracted. Anyone and everyone is welcome to join, and feel free to simply lurk and observe if you'd like! If that's of interest to you (or anyone reading this) then we'd love to have you!

Thank you again for reading TAMN, I'm so happy you liked it :') <3 <3 -🔒