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⋆。°✩⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ Welcome! ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆。°✩
Hello! I am Fyre! And this is my main blog with my side being @a-starseeker for reblogs so I don't flood this one. I try to tag as much as I can for organization, I use tags like fyre art or fyre rambling for my posts. I am over 18 so nsfw will be on both blogs! 🔞
My main fandom is: Harry Potter with various others sprinkled in as well.
I am an artist and a writer! My links can be found here if you want to follow me on other platforms. Can tip/support me also on ko-fi
I write for various ships in HP, smut, dead dove, beware tags, read at your own risk. I write from Sirius x Regulus, to prongsfoot, deerhunter (Orion x james), Sev x lily, Sev x Sirius, and plan to write more. Marauders era is where I usually am in, hahahaha.
Remember, fiction ≠ reality, things are not black and white and fiction should be a safe place to explore and let yourself run wild as long as you harm no one real. You may be squicked by one thing but that gives you no right to harass others, learn to block key words and tags or accounts instead of attacking/harassing others. Also characters are fictional but the people behind the screens aren't and your words can harm them.
My ao3 is fiendsihfyre
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Writing Master Post Section
Current Fests/Events I'm In:
Prongsfoot Bingo :
No fics out yet
More to be added.
#hp fanfic wroter#hp fanartist#hp fandom#fanfic writer#the marauders#marauders fandom#sirius black#prongsfoot#deerhunter#hp deerhunter#james potter#regulus black#lily evans#marauders era#dead gay wizards#the marauders era#severus snape#mwpp#blackcest#starcest#the most noble and ancient house of black#the black family#if anyone is reading this end#if you can guess where my side blog username is based off of#I'll write you a fic or drawing#a treat for whoever pays me full attention or is curious to look through all the tags
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Finally now that the comic is fully public on comicfury, I get to share it with all of you here, too <3
If you enjoyed, please consider supporting by buying a PDF of the comic on itch.io: https://tawnysoup.itch.io/home-in-the-woods
#I'd rather not clutter the caption so I'll ramble a little in the tags#HitW is short but special to me as it represents and encapsulates some hard life experiences I was going through at the time of its creatio#Ofc in a more metaphorical manner! but. I have been very much enjoying reading people's comments and speculation as its been posting#the interpretations are so meaningful and varied and i love that and really want to encourage anyone to reflect on what it means to them#for me making this comic was a way to process and move past trauma. i feel like it ends anti-climactically but i wanted to be true to#where i thought things were actually going in my life moreso than to veer towards impact. ultimately im glad i managed to finish it#and for it to finish going public right before the new year? maybe i can see this as shedding that old pain in time to become something new#so thank you for reading for supporting and for still being here. lets wake up to 2025 with wind in our sails#Home in the Woods#my art#my comics#original comic#cw guns#cw blood#cw body horror
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real talk having the 2nd worst new years eve yet 🤢🤢🤢 (throat infection, twisted neck, banged-about-foot, ego AND the rest o' me all bruised like misjuggled peaches 🍑🍑🍑)
im bent outa shape and suspectin the universe owes me 8 buck if anyone wannsa chip in
#yes the 🍑🍑🍑was just an excuse to shove ass emojis in your face i'm only (occasionally. allegedly) human#now ask me about my FIRST worst new year eve. it involves wizards and portals and elaborate lies i make up on the spot#SAD REAL TALK <STARTS>:#also made the mistake of reaching out to my mom post-xmas#like what kind of c-ptsd NOOB does that. what kinda chronic holiday trauma survivor NOVICE??? embarrassing#THE SEDUCTIVE FALSE HOPE OF NOSTALGIA WILL LURE YOU IN EVERY TIME#'oh but maybe they won't disappoint me. but maybe they won't rip my heart out this time'#sweetheart that's your dear sweet inner child's yearning for what never was or will be. BEAT IT BACK WITH A STICK!#SAD REAL TALK <ENDS>#....back to that part where i talked about being bent out of shape#if anyone w/ metalwork skills wants ta take a blowtorch & hammer & tongs & have at... I'm open to experimentation is all im sayin#in lieu of that i would also welcome someone buying me a sandwich. i am. so sore.#(metaphysically sore but also the other more urgent im-at-my-daily-NSAIDs-limit kinda sore)#(hence: sanwimch)#...i got so sleepy writing this i started imagining the astonishing hedonism#of stroking a freshly grilled cheese-dripping sandwhich across my body like a loofah#the soothingness of the gooey warm near liquid cheese. the vaguely spongelike quality of toasted sourdough slice.#look i didn't imagine it on PURPOSE it just came to me like a vision like a threat#like one of those weird mens locker room ads where the sportsball is watermelon??? u know the one#where there's nudity & food & homoerotica & hot steaming showers in the background and STILL the overall effect is more offputting than sex#look i have a throat infection. i can barely swallow. i'm sipping chocolate milk to survive and i'm NOT EVEN ENJOYING IT. each drop is agon#(opposite side of the Tantalus spectrum but i'm suffering more than he has in 3.5 thousand years)#i'm dehydrated. barely conscious. electrolytes are circling down the drain. doctors should be incubating me w/ capri sun straws right now.#I GET A PASS ON THESE TAGS#i don't know what i wrote! and i don't stand by it! and you can't make me read em!!!
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Was there ever one...?
#Celtrist#cel doodles#fanart#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#hellaverse#hellaverse fanart#alastor the radio demon#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin alastor#angelicsmile#radiorose#radiobelle#radiodust#radioqueen#radioapple#radiostatic#vaggastor#radiomoth#There wasn't any ship in mind making this#Actually was intended as an aro thing#But could totally be read as a ship thing (hence all the listed ships)#And I know what people are looking up#Who's on the other end?#Was there ever anyone?#soulmate au#red string of fate#artists on tumblr#radiojoy
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sometimes I think of all the on-the-surface warm, well-meaning but deeply ineffectual advice and attention john gives harrow through harrow the ninth (make some soup and get some sleep! get a hobby! don't be so hard on yourself! self care harrow! as long as I need take no actual responsibility in this relationship whatsoever I would have loved to be your dad!) set up against the stark truth that with his other hand he has been staging her attempted horrific murder again and again and again like a living nightmare on the logic that it will 'put her down or fix her'. and then I find that I wish there is a hell. a special hell where twitch streamers turned necromantic death emperors go
#the locked tomb#harrowhark nonagesimus#john gaius#harrow the ninth#this is why I don't buy john as misunderstood and initially well-meaning AT ALL#this is a pattern you see with him again and again and again -- right down to his interpersonal relationships#(and indeed it's in the more grounded interpersonal relationships you can most clearly see him as he is I think#the fantasy death empire of a thousand years doesn't register quite as viscerally because it's like. heightened; not quite real#but the emotional violence and manipulation that surrounds him? oh boy that is EXTREMELY real and scarily well-observed)#there's a premeditation to so much of what he does (contracts with planets that only end 'in the event of the emperor's death' anyone?#yeah john we get it you're hilarious and I wish you weren't)#the greatest trick john ever pulled was making anyone think he's just a lil guy. what does he know he's only god#when you first read the book the complete callousness of the other adults is so horrible that john seems like an oasis of care#(though you start to get this uneasy feeling when that care never seems to translate to like... relief or soothing or resolution)#and it makes it feel almost obscene when you find out what's actually going on#it's the mercy & augustine enabler hour but at least they're completely honest in their cruelty there#while john is -- well he sure is being john huh#this is just me being angry with him btw philosophically I don't think this is how the story will or should end#(with john slam dunked right into hell that is)#it's just... harrow is so vulnerable. and what he does to her is so insidious and fucked up#john is very deeply human. unfortunately the capacity to quite simply suck so much is deeply human too
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someone should write a story where there’s ppl stuck in a time loop, but the pov is from someone who rlly doesn’t care. there’s a whole ‘protagonist group’ or whatever trying to figure out how to escape the loop but this dude has just kept living their life so no one has noticed that they’re also stuck. they’re just sipping the exact same coffee order for the hundredth time watching the group strategize at an adjacent table and thinkin “man, wonder if they’re gonna figure out how to fix that today.”
#that one kid in the group project#my pondering#writing prompt?#if someone actually writes this or has read smth similar plz tell me#i have a deep fascination with stories from ‘side character’ perspectives#idk how this would have a plot#if i already knew how i want it to end i would’ve written it#problem is i want to read it#hell i’ll probably still write this at some point#i won’t tell anyone tho#my google docs r full of stories i wrote for me to read c:
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i hesitate to say whether it’s inherently negative or positive but it is certain that reading homestuck permanently alters people’s brains. no other fandom have i witnessed or took part in has ever created that level of dedication and craziness, and definitely not with the same longevity. you STILL see involved homestuck cosplays at conventions and if you follow new people reading it it’s like watching a very entertaining descent into a specific type of madness
#homestuck#cricket chirps#i think the vocabulary plays a big part in it because by the end of act 4 you talk about the comic#and you’re entirely incomprehensible to anyone who hasn’t read it#1k
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Parallel Lines and Brothers.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#lan wangji#lan xichen#jin zixuan#Does anyone else think about the tragedy of the parallel lines? Of characters who are parallel lines?#Of running the same course as someone. Of echoing each other in perfect synchronicity.#It's more than being a foil. It's about being on the same path and being so near to each other.#and yet parallel lines never intersect. They cannot meet each other despite their existence being tied to another.#I think the brothers tragedy is just as much of a tragedy of parallel lines as is pre-resurrection wangxian.#Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian spend so much time running side by side and yet - they cant close this gap between them.#Even if their relationship never recovers - they are forever tied together through their past. The good and bad and ugly.#All the things that are left unsaid between them. All the love and sacrifices they made for each other that are never shared. Parallel line#I firmly believe any post-canon material that would have them be indifferent towards each other is just...really doing them a disservice.#And dear god the Lan brothers. They certainly love each other! Its a far fonder fraternal relationship than jiangxian (/platonic)#They fool you by having you think they have a good read on each other. Lan Xichen certainly wingmans + advocates for lwj!#But lets not forget - Lan Xichen by the end is in the reverse situation and headspace as Lan Wangji by the end of this story.#Lan Wangji is more free and open than he has ever been. He's in love. He's married. He and wwx are intersecting lines.#& LXC who grew up with and lived the same path as LWJ - who even is said to resemble him visually - his parallel line - shuts himself away#Despite all the love LWJ has for his brother I don't think he ever manages to reach him.
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https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-3999
String identified: SCP-3999 Object Class: Apollyon Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3999 cannot be contained stop be contained
String identified: Item #:
String identified: Researcher Talloran:
Closest match: Trametes ferrium Common name: Metal eating fungus.
Researcher Talloran is to be identified using the BLAST database modeled using AlphaFold kept in a standard terrarium suitable for moths.
Common name: finding tumblr's genome one post at a time.
String identified: The following file contains a virulent infohazard. Due to this, it is imperative that all personnel accessing this file be certified as having a Cognitive Resistance Value (CRV) of no less than 14.5. Should you fail an automated CRV verification, please remain calm and do not move. A member of your site's medical staff Researcher Talloran will be with you shortly.
Special Containment Procedures: Researcher Talloran is to have his genome aligned with its 12 closest genetic matches using MEGA. Navigate to the "table" section and select phylogenetic tree. Click "yes." Use sub-branches to note connections between each branch, such as families or kingdoms.
Item #: Cydia strobilella genome assembly, chromosome: Z Object Class: Spruce seed moth
(Researcher Talloran must link the image source.) This can be the only conclusive fact.
So stop asking.
#asks#requests#sent to me#scp#scp-3999#scp 3999#bugs#insects#moths#spruce seed moth#unreality#in case anyone is wondering. i did indeed BLAST this SCP article and the spruce seed moth was the result#however i saw the opportunity to be a fucking nerd in public and so i took it.#i recently read this scp. pretty neat#happens to be in the same series as my all time favorite!#this scp had some interesting little biology worldbuilding which i loved OFC. but it kinda fell off toward the end#if you read it/have read it share your opinion too :)
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Inspired by that one person who continued a fic after their best friend died...
Jason Todd had an ao3 account. Jason Todd had balls of steel and logged into the batcomputer. (Trying to figure out his username but I keep thinking BlueBird or CrimeAlleyBoy)
Bruce was well aware of this. He didn't think to log it out of the batcomputer, keeping the tab open just for Jason. He's read some of that stuff that Jason has written (mind you, the kid was an avid defender and writer of WonderBat). He found it rather cute and it wasn't like Bruce has never read fanfiction about himself (both Bruce and Batman).
And Jason? He wasn't really sure if Bruce knew but he didn't really care that much. And besides, being Robin made sure he was prepared for anything the Ao3 curse was going to throw at him. If that damn curse sent Riddler then his fist would be the solution.
There were around 20 fics in that damn account, ranging from his OTP that was WonderBat, some SuperBat, and the crack fics of Bruceman. (Jason would never allow himself to tell Dick his username but he sure as hell has his older brother beta read all the Bruceman fics. That man was one of the OGs and he wouldn't disgrace his brother.)
He avoids the Ao3 curse until it appears in the form of the Joker.
When Jason dies, Bruce keeps the tab open, making sure that the account doesn't log off. Because that was a part of his son. (When he missed Jason a tad too much at times, he'd read one of those ridiculous fics that would make his two eldest sons laugh.)
When it's around two months after Jason's death, Bruce gains the courage to post an announcement on his son's account, making sure his fans were well informed and not anticipating for the next chapter.
I'm sorry to announce that this account will no longer be posting any updates. This is the author's father and I must unfortunately inform you that my son has passed away. Thank you for being there for him and reading his stories...
The post is along those lines.
(Tim was an avid reader of that account and was utterly devastated when Robin's death was further confirmed through this post. Yes he knew this was Jason's account. Of course he did!)
But Jason comes back from the dead.
Sees his account again after getting out of the league. Sees Bruce's announcement and maybe it makes him feel a little better.
But Jason's a menace and the day he started posting fics was the day he vowed that he wouldn't let the Ao3 curse take him. He even announced that to his readers in his first story (WonderBat obviously)
He posts an entire fic of oneshots consisting of Batman with numerous members of the Justice League. In his end notes, it says:
Not even death can stop me. I write WonderBat in the face of Death and told him to fuck off.
The next few posts consist of Batman/Justice League, even a few Bruce/Justice League (yes, that includes Batman). And Bruce, with Jason's account still logged into the batcomputer, is mortified when he sees Tim shamelessly read a 5+1 fic of BatLantern on that huge ass screen.
#dcu#jason todd#red hood#batman#bruce wayne#tim drake#red robin#ao3#Jason was an Ao3 writer and was known as one of the best WonderBat and Bruceman writers of all time#Dick was his Bruceman beta reader#I swear to god he wrote a regency au of the Justice League with a love triangle between the trinity and ending as poly#Bruce sees all the 20+ BatLantern fics he's posted out of pure spite#Jason doesnt give af if anyone from the hero community has read those fics#yes a lot of them have read it aka Tim Dick Cassie Steph and a lot more#Dick was the OG Bruceman shipper#Tim shipped BatLantern out of spite
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essays i want to write about hotch
hotch and fire -> who couldn't he save? what happened?
hotch and gideon's relationship -> because spencer wasn't the only one gideon walked away from
the foyet arc -> specifically the stabbing. specifically how it was almost 100% also sexual assault and how hotch chooses to deal with it
hotch and anger -> i wonder if he has his father's temper
hotch and his team -> he loves them so deeply, so completely. that has to take a toll.
the scratch arc -> being drugged like that has to leave some kind of deep mental scars. as well as seeing a victim with your name carved into their forehead. also im convinced that if TG hadn't left, spencer's prison arc would have been hotch's instead.
hotch and autism -> and how he sees a freedom in reid that he feels he's never had for himself.
hotch's childhood -> "an extremely violent, abusive household" ok lets expand on that!!
hotch and leadership -> heavy is the head that wears the crown
#i may end up writing some of these anyway#would anyone read them lmao#brain worms so bad#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#character study
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Alright, there's something I'd like to talk about, and let's come at it with an open mind. When Season one of Arcane ended I was 99% sure that Mel was not going to make it to this season. I was praying for every kind of miracle that could happen just to keep that beautiful goddess on screen but she was the first line of contact for that bomb.
Now that everything has been revealed, I want to talk about that bomb.
Ironically, Season two episode one starts with the exact same shine of gold that ended season one.
See, season one:
Season two:
And when the smoke clears we can see her leaning really close to Jayce, like she got blasted towards him.
Now, looking at the seat arrangements from Season one, I can actually see it a lot better now that I'm taking a second look. We can see that she is standing directly in the line of fire, Jayce is standing to her left and Viktor is sitting in his chair, Jayce's chair. Just about everyone sitting by her right died, Salo is sitting furthest away from the blast, opposite her. He probably saw it just a few seconds before she did.
And when she wakes up, all groggy and out of focus, her hands are on his shoulder. They been there, she did not just put them there, she already had her hands on him. Protecting him.
But what I really want to pay attention to, is the look on Mel's face when she and Jayce take in the damage.
The entire place burned down. Realistically, not a single person should have survived that, especially not unharmed.
Then the damage starts sinking in (Don't look at Jayce, look at Mel):
Look at Mel, as they look around the room of injured Councillors.
Jayce is panicking, full on panicking, he's had his nerves rattled, he's never seen anything like this (unlike Mel who, if the audience remembers, grew up in Noxus). And the sweetest thing is how she follows him around, trying to comfort him, while he's trying to shake Cassandra awake.
And she stays right there by his side, until her mother pulls her away (foreshadowing about their duties pulling them apart perhaps?)
Now, imagine you were in the middle of a disaster, a terrible disaster, and you had the power to save every single person in that room, but you did not know this because no one ever bothered once telling you that you had powers. However, in that moment, you did indeed save one person, without knowing, without even thinking. Who did Mel save?
She saved Jayce. (The craziest thing about that.....is that.... Viktor was literally right beside him. He was right beside Jayce OMG 😭😭).
Watching this scene, I cannot imagine the amount of guilt that threatened to swallow Mel whole ever0y time she saw the aftermath of what happened and a small part of her brain would nag her that she could have prevented it, that she could have protected Jayce's friend.
So why Jayce? Why ONLY Jayce?
"Because she loves him."
Obvious answer, two plus two equals four, but this is Arcane we're talking about, there is more to this simple equation and it is plain to see in their reactions in the aftermath.
Jayce is devastated. He is new to war, he does not know shit about it, it scares him to see all the people that he respects flattened like they are nothing. The Piltover Council means something to Jayce.
To Mel, they are colleagues. They are.... people with names and faces and power. They are people she would help on a normal day, but at the first sign of danger she clung to one person.
Jayce was Viktor's first friend, and he was Mel's too. He was the first person to tell her that she was not crazy. The first person to strangely believe in her dreams, to pour out affection not out of arrogance but genuine care that he was not ashamed or even hesitant to show her. He fought for peace when she began to doubt. When she felt unstable, his naivete and pure heart steadied her.
Mel loved Jayce. Loved him so much that she did not freak out when he was tweaking cause of the Arcane. So much that she fought for him when he was getting outright dominated by his ex. 💀💀 And while it is not the space shattering world changing soul bonded union of javik, I think it is beautiful that Mek loved Jayce.
I think it's ironic that the brotherly love that people keep trying to achieve with Jayce and Viktor was represented so well with Jayce and Mel. I think it's iconic that a male and female character that banged on screen can go their separate ways without a dramatic breakup and without losing the entirety of their care for one another (cause some of it was definitely damaged after their individual trauma).
What I'm trying to say is that Mel loved Jayce. The love was there. Call it romantic or platonic or whatever but she cared about him more than she cared about anyone in that room when that bomb went off.
And it just twists something in my heart....that Jayce was so loved by the two people that meant so much to him. That he gave all of his heart out and they gave everything back because of how selfless his love was. Everyone says Viktor and Mel are out of Jayce's league but they both keep putting him first. (TT) They just cannot resist that all encompassing love of his. It saved Viktor, and it saved Mel who finally found her truth, and lost him to find it.
#meljayvik#not canon? very canon bexause they both loved that pathetic loser 😭#and this is not to say that Mel missed out on Jayce's love because she actually got the full package#and he showed her how selfless love can be and she'll never settle for less ever again#and I'm just crying over Mel finding herself because the dude she took interest in ended up healing her#I'm just ranting rubbish at this point#don't know if anyone will even read it#mel arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#mel medarda#I love Jayce Talis and his weird super power of attracting the most cosmically powerful beings in the universe#and accidentally making them love him so deeply. he is so loveable. I can't believe he ever had haters#jayce talis#jayce x mel#jayce x viktor
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no you don't get it. i literally love stories where they dive into people's hearts/minds (literally or figuratively) sm it's my favourite type of storytelling.
#p5s#fairy ranmaru#shiguang daili ren#limbo the king#king in limbo#pet anime#pet manga#pet 2020#dmmd#homunculus#homunculus manga#sankaku mado no sotogawa wa yoru#the night beyond the tricornered window#sarazanmai#id invaded#paprika 2006#wonder egg priority#tedpost#it allows them to portray emotions in such visually interesting ways#and is a great way to make parallels between the person who's mind they're in and the main characters#these were all the ones i could think of rn but i bet theres more that i havent seen yet#also i only mentioned scramble here because i think it does this concept better than regular p5 lmao.#FEEL FREE TO SUGGEST ME MORE OF THESE#doesnt matter what medium or genre!! could be a book a movie idc i eat stuff like this upppp#EDIT; updates the post after reading ltk and checking if tricorner fit this desc#EDIT; added homunculus too because whilst technically he never actually enters anyones minds he does visualise them into the real world#so its the same end result of seeing a person's true thoughts and feelings. but a slightly different method to get there
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good omens + text posts (part 9)
an assortment i made last year with some season 2 mixed in for variety :3c
#good omens#aziraphale#crowley#anthony j crowley#gabriel good omens#anathema device#newton pulsifer#newt pulsifer#pepper good omens#gomens#ineffable partners#ineffable husbands#text post meme#fex post meme#fex pix#go tpm#i meant to make this post weeks ago but i got too in my own head about mixing memes from s1 and s2 shfkdhfks#like overthinking about if i should keep the seasons separated unless there's a specific theme like in the last set i posted#but in the end i decided that it's probably not something anyone would have any opinion on lmao and so here we are#if you're reading this and you Do have opinions about how to arrange my memes then feel free to tell me
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sellllllll it's meeeeee. hehehehehehehehehhehe
so for ur writing exercises.... deku + light? please? pretty please?
:3c
heheh heheh hehe niku. this will be the death of me. me writing izuku for the first time 🥲 i will only do this for you </3
contains: established relationship, spoilers for the end of the manga, aged up deku but sometime in between the final outcome (he doesn't get the h*** s*** from bakugo yet), mentions of sex and scars
deku + light
izuku only sleeps with the lights off.
it isn't uncommon; many people you know can't sleep with even just a sliver of light turned on somewhere in the room. but the difference with izuku, you learn, is not that he's unable to stand the light―it's that he refuses to.
you quickly pick up on it the first few times he sleeps over.
he fidgets in bed, pretty badly, actually. the nightlight you sleep with glows a warm yellow, illuminating the side of your face and coating him in its afterglow. you chalk it up to nerves, how he pulls at his sleeves and adjusts his position constantly; he is, after all, one of the most anxious people you know.
and this relationship―it's new. heck, even you feel a little jittery with his arm wrapped around you.
the rhythmic tapping on your hip only increases pace. you don't think he realizes it, so your hand gently reaches for his, intertwining your fingers as you turn around in his arms.
he's close, nearly touching you nose-to-nose; the proximity leaves you fuzzy, a little ticklish, so you giggle, a soft "oops," as the freckles dusting his face almost glisten under the warm light.
"hi," you whisper, meeting his eyes; they stare back at you wide in surprise, "can't sleep?"
he looks almost guilty at your question, as if you’ve caught him with the one thing he's been trying to keep from you.
"just—" his voice comes out louder than intended, prompting him to chuckle nervously as he readjusts his volume, "just winding down, sorry."
you inch closer, nuzzling his nose lightly, "it's okay."
"did i wake you?" he asks, cheeks flushing pink as his eyebrows furrow in immediate concern. his expression is something caught between stifling a grin and feeling sorry.
you shake your head against the pillow you share, strands of your hair tangling with his. "just winding down," you tease, watching as his gaze turns softer, eyelids drooping heavier.
sometimes, you think, izuku holds the world in his eyes―a deep, dark green, the color of life. most times, they look at you with wonderment, bright and alive; photos from inko tell you they're the eyes of his inner child.
on nights like this one, however, they hide a depth in them weighted by what you can only assume is time, and all that has happened to him in such a short span of it.
you try your best to understand what lies beneath them, knowing full well he'll never tell you outright what truly bothers him.
"is it the light?" you bring up, some time after laying in silence.
"hm?" he clarifies.
"do you have a hard time sleeping with the nightlight?"
his eyes widen briefly once more, as if shocked that you've caught him again. these split second reactions are ones you've learned to be attentive to when it comes to izuku.
"no," he tries to lie, but you know better as you turn to your nightstand and reach for its switch, "you don't–"
"it was hurting my eyes," you quickly make up an excuse, tucking yourself closer under his chin as you cut off his attempt to deny it again.
finding out that the light was the problem was the easy part—
you'd begun to notice much earlier on that izuku was barely rested on the nights he'd spend at your place. it was only when your old nightlight broke that you began to notice him waking up much later than you did, groggily rousing from a deep sleep.
—what was hard, was figuring out why.
at first, you suspected it was his scars.
"s-sorry, it's not—" he'd warned you, right as your hands gripped the hem of his shirt the first time you were about to have sex, "—it's not nice."
you didn't care though; you still don't care, and you've made that abundantly clear to him since. you love izuku and all his parts―all the nicks and jaggedy pieces of skin that make up who he is.
when you eventually ask him about it, with a request that he be honest with you for once, he tells you that it is and it isn't―the reason why he exclusively sleeps with the lights off, that is.
it's an odd, comforting relationship he has with his body—that he is simultaneously grateful and sorry for how its become a canvas, both painted and marred to symbolize japan’s historic last stand.
you find out the real reason when you catch him staring at his hands.
he does it often, when he thinks you aren't looking—his fists bunched up in the same way he used to watch the power of one for all course through his fingertips; the same way he used to prepare them in battle.
there’s a faraway look in his eyes that lingers, you notice—a little wistful if anything.
“do you miss it?” you finally ask. he gives you the same shocked look he does every time, as if he’s been caught with a secret he’s been trying to hide.
he’s learned a fair bit about you now, too, though—lying to you is futile when you’ve perfected reading his truth. he stares at his fists again as you take a seat beside him, moving to give you space. you rest your head on his shoulder gently, waiting.
“sometimes,” he admits, but you know it’s an understatement.
“i think about the vestiges a lot. i miss them the most, i think,” he continues, clenching his fists tightly, “i always try to reach out to them, but i guess it doesn’t work that way.”
“i… i try to replicate the right conditions every night, but…” then he lets go, stretching his fingers out wide. the scars on the surface ripple through his skin, telling its own story.
you hum, acknowledging what he means. silence sits with the two of you as you take his hand in yours, slowly unfurling his fingers until his palm reveals itself to you. it’s rough to the touch, seasoned with hard work and all that he’s been through.
“is that why you prefer the dark?” you ask softly, after some time.
it's not often that you stay up later than izuku does. when you do though, you catch him shifting in bed, moving from side-to-side. you pretend you aren't awake, but you hear him mumble their names, dwindling in volume as he dozes off to sleep.
he stares at his palm for a moment before he admits quietly, "yeah." his brows furrow as if contemplating whether to say more, but he shakes his head, dark green strands swaying to the beat of his embarrassed chuckle, "nevermind, it's silly."
"it's not."
you intertwine your fingers, sandwiching his hand between yours. a slight sheen glosses over his eyes as he tilts his head up to look at you. he draws in a breath, before it spills over.
"it's..." he finds the words, and you squeeze his hand in comfort, "it's easier to believe it was all real when the lights are out, and that maybe it can happen again."
#deku x reader#izuku x reader#midoriya x reader#bnha x reader#shotorus.workbook#it is here ! the first time ive ever written izuku ! i hope u like it niku !#idt i'll ever feel like anything i write of him will be enough but i tried !#SPOILERS FOR MANGA ENDING PLS DONT READ AHEAD#some stuff abt the blurb: i see this happening in the time between him losing ofa and before getting the suit from bakugo#so somewhere between when hes teaching#and i think its a lot of complex feelings ― he's happy he did what he had to do but is also mourning the loss of something he once had#i don't think i can ever convey that feeling fully but i hope i at least managed to touch on it here with him !#i see this as like . the period in his life where he's transitioning out of something he once knew into smth else entirely#i also hc reader to be his colleague (like a teacher or smth) but anyone closely related to the job would work !#really just someone who has a base level understanding of what he went through but doesnt know everything#which is why they're still trying to learn all these things abt him and read him better#and also why he tries to hide a lot of things from them still / is hesitant to share in fear of scaring them away smth like that !#thats all i can think of for now but ill let u know if i have other thoughts on this later on ! hehe#hope u enjoy niku !#ask#rep#ask game answered#most nervewracking experience of my LIFE writing him#stellamancer#niku.🥩
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Cassandra Cain and Asian Stereotypes
So I've seen people debating whether Cass is a racist character or not because she falls into certain Asian stereotypes. While this discussion is valid and important, a lot of the conversation (on this website and beyond) is steered by White/non-Asian people, or people who haven't read a lot of Cass' stuff. This is my take on Cass and Asian stereotypes as a Chinese Cass fan. I do not speak for all Asians, or even all Chinese people, who are absolutely free to disagree with any of these arguments.
Stereotypes I will cover here: Silent Asian, Model Minority, and Hypersexuality.
The Silent Asian Stereotype
The most obvious stereotype Cass runs into is the Silent Asian. I would recommend reading the linked article for more information. Silent Asian characters are Asians who are part of a core cast, but rarely speak. Kimiko Miyashiro in The Boys, Lilly in Pitch Perfect, and Katana in Suicide Squad are all examples of this. The article also mentions Ben from Umbrella Academy, who can only communicate with one character, thus limiting his dialogue.
Why does this happen? Removing Asian characters' dialogue reflects the Western conception of Asians as demure, rule-following, and meek, never speaking up or acting out. It also means writers don't have to spend as much time writing these Asian characters, who are secondary to White protagonists.
The problem with the Silent Asian, then, is not the silence itself, but the consequences of silence. Mute Asians exist, as do Asians who don't speak much; in media, Silent Asians are harmful because they indicate an unwillingness to focus on the Asian character.
This is why Cass, even before she learns to speak longer sentences, is not a Silent Asian. While her conception undoubtedly has unfortunate echoes of this trope, she defies it by being the protagonist of the story. A protagonist cannot be a Silent Asian, because a requirement of the trope is being a secondary character. Cass' feelings and actions are the center of Batgirl (2000), so allegations of this stereotype don't actually make sense.
Furthermore, the trope is about passivity and acquiescence to a White authority. From her introduction, Cass is neither passive nor acquiescent - her origin story is literally about defying David Cain, a White male authority figure. Beyond her not speaking much, she ticks none of the boxes for this stereotype. I think it's time for people to stop mentioning this stereotype in conjunction with Cass, who in every possible way subverts it.
The Model Minority Stereotype
The model minority myth is the belief that Asians are more successful and talented than others, particularly other minoritised groups. Like the Silent Asian, the model minority myth paints Asians as obedient and submissive. This is, in many ways, more insidious than the Silent Asian - there are still people who believe this stereotype (and jokes like 'of course you're good at math, you're Asian') is somehow not racist.
Though this myth seems positive, make no mistake that White people invented this tale for two reasons: to put down Black and Brown communities, and to prevent Asians from ever fully assimilating into White culture.
Cass plays on this myth very interestingly. I've discussed in this post how David Cain and Bruce's assertion that she's 'perfect' is a blatant reference to the model minority myth - by describing her as 'perfect' to them, they are centering their own desires, erasing Cass' individuality.
This is partially why I don't like 'Cass is Bruce's favourite' and 'Cass is an angel who can do no wrong' interpretations when people are just saying it without context. Cass being Bruce's favourite, or Bruce seeing her as an angel, is not a good thing - it is a representation of his biased attitude towards her. He is unable to accept her being a murderer because he is trapped within the model minority mindset. This is not saying Bruce is a full-on racist, but that his actions and perspectives are coloured by his Whiteness.
Cass' abrasive personality, willingness to defy Bruce and David, and very real flaws (her inability to see grey areas, communication difficulties, etc.) make her avoid this stereotype. Additionally, her close relationships with Black characters like Onyx and Duke are essential to combating the anti-Blackness at the core of the model minority myth. Her character evokes the stereotype (perfect martial arts silent fighter), but ultimately defies it through being the star of her own story (and also not being good at math. The fact she doesn't have anything to do with tech is actually one of my favourite aspects of her character, because I am TIRED of tech Asian characters).
The Hypersexual Asian Woman Stereotype
Asian women are often exoticised and fetishised as the ideal sexual partner; think of the term 'yellow fever', which describes men lusting after Asian women. The hypersexualisation of Asian women in media once again goes hand-in-hand with Asians being submissive. They are seen as innocent and child-like, while simultaneously being seductive and sexually experienced.
This stereotype is genuinely perpetuated in Batgirl (2000), mainly by the art in Horrocks' run. Where in Puckett's run there is refreshingly little sexualisation of Cass, once you hit Horrocks' run you get a LOT more shots of her lying down, sexually suggestive covers, etc. People have discussed this already, probably to more effect than I will do here.
However, as I wrote in my Gender and Sexuality posts, the writing is actually fairly defiant of this trope. Cass is vocally uncomfortable with hypersexualisation, and neither of her male love interests stick around. The problem with the Hypersexual Asian Woman is the focus on White sexual interests, where the woman is objectified for the White male gaze. Simply because Cass is the protagonist, the writing focuses on her sexual interests, and in the end it's about gaining control of her gender presentation and sexuality.
Cassandra Cain Vs. Asian Stereotypes
The through-line that connects all these Asian stereotypes is a lack of agency. There's a reason passiveness is the main trait for all of these tropes- the Asian body must be weaker than their White counterparts, in order to be tools or weapons against other minoritised groups.
Cassandra Cain, a character born from a choice that defies White male authority, rises above this passiveness with flying colours. The details of her character certainly fall into some of the above tropes, and the way her character is handled later (evil Cass, New 52), is certainly racist. However, the reason she means so much to me is because at its core, her story is a story of Asian agency. And that in itself is unstereotypical.
#cassandra cain#batgirl#batgirl 2000#race#uhhh idk why i wrote this whole essay idk if anyone will read this entire thing#it's a love letter to cass and a racism analysis all in one#definitely other asians may disagree and that's totally valid#this is NOT the be all end all of opinions of cass and race!! please read other people's opinions as well#i didn't even touch on how cass' suicidal ideation is a refreshing portrayal of asian mental health which is a hugely underrepresented topi#model minority myth when i get you...#batman#meta
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