#if anyone ever wants to write any of them PLEEEEEASE

[blemishezarchive]

DAISY CHAINS! sapphic punk band. opening act on the "blemishes made me gay" tour. will bite the head off of any cishet man who comes into the vicinity - this is NOT a safe space.

pauline shen, vocalist. 27, non-binary, she/they, lesbian. a little bit of an ego; has beef with adam for absolutely no reason. friends with jodie and jude. indifferent to anwar. (fc: jessie mei li)

lydia devlin, bassist. 27, cis woman, she/her, bisexual. very bold, outspoken, will punch you in the face without question. hooked up with adam a couple times and then never again. (fc: emma mackey)

joanie martínez, lead guitarist. 28, trans woman, she/her, bisexual. absolute angel for the most part. (fc: zión moreno)

beatrice "bea" crawley, rhythm guitarist. 29, cis woman, she/her, lesbian. not quite the mom friend - more like the semi-absent reluctant father figure. (fc: olivia cooke)

charlie moss, drummer. 26, non-binary, they/them, lesbian. just a gremlin. gets along with all the members of blemishes, and pretty much everyone else. (fc: brigette lundy-paine)

[whumpsday]

BBU Community Days #9: Owned

here are two of my favorite BBU pieces taking place during captivity!

The Cedar Chest from Zee / Frathouse Boxboy by @deluxewhump

This is still one of my favorite whump pieces ever, let alone just BBU pieces. It was the first BBU writing I ever reblogged to this blog. The claustrophobia, the way Zee tries so hard to comply and is still shoved in the box for absolutely no reason. THE BEGGING. The careless party-guy atmosphere is built up so well, and you can really feel Zee's fear. I literally have parts of this memorized I've re-read it so often. Bee has left whump behind, but I will always look back on her writing fondly.

Excerpt:

“You are a Box Boy, right? Shouldn’t we keep you in a box when we’re done playing with you?” “Gross.” Someone gestures at the blood on his knees, on the floor.  “N…..no,” Zee whispers, eyes widening. He pushes back against Michael’s hand on the back of his neck. “Please. Tyler, please. Michael?” Tyler nods to Michael and he pushes Zee forward toward the box. He doesn’t mean to fight, to struggle. He doesn’t. He wants to be good but they make it so hard. He can’t go inside that. He can’t it’s too small, it’s too SMALL for him, they can’t close the lid and he’d be inside, they could bury him alive in the dirt he’d never get out, he’d dig at the top with his fingernails til they split and broke and run out of air. He doesn’t realize how hard he’s struggling until two more boys rush into help Michael, grabbing Zee’s wrists and holding them tight, picking up his legs and setting him in.  “No! Nonono pleeeease, pleeeeease I’ll do anything— I’ll stay on the, the caps. I’ll drink the king’s cup, I swear, I swear to god— please— pl...nonono, I was good! I was good!”  Michael’s hand covers his mouth with bruising force. He tries to scream for Alex, looking wildly at the people around him for a friendly or sympathetic face as they wrestle him into the box, legs tucked up so he’ll fit. 

Corset from Seven Series by @whump-queen

AAAAA AKIA... I LOVE SEVEN... I love how this piece showcases Seven's learned helplessness. He can reason that his owner wouldn't want Kiarra to hurt him, and he wants Kiarra to stop hurting him, but he doesn't take the obvious route of informing Antoine, because he's so conditioned into just accepting whatever pain anyone wants to give him. The whump aspect is also really unique and well-done. Not just being forced into a too-tight corset, but being forced to complete his domestic work with it on? OUCH.

Excerpt:

“P-please, no, no more—I can’t— can’t take—” “Oh you can’t take any more?” She sounds angry, Seven has overstepped, no no please— “I-I’m sorry M—" As if out of pure spite, she gives one final, brutal tug, and Seven cries out, his eyes are squeezed shut, his head is spinning. He can’t breathe he can’t breathe he can’t— “See, you can take it after all, can’t you.”  She grabs his shoulder and spins him around, and a delighted smile spreads across her face when she finally sees his expression—His cheeks are red, his eyes are lidded, small beaded tears glisten in the corners, threatening to spill over at any second. His lips are bitten red and bloody and parted as he desperately gasps for air.  He looks as if he might pass out. Perfect. “Put your shirt back on,” she orders, and while Seven stumbles over to the chair to retrieve his button-down shirt, she continues, “You are to return to your duties now, Seven.” Panicked eyes shoot up at her from where he’s fumbling with the buttons, “W-what?”

@bbu-on-the-side

[da3dm]

oc ask game!

irza: 2, 5, 6, 18, 35 & 45

vara: 2, 6, 8, 16, 18, 36, 38 & 48

eze: 5, 11, 17, 19 (reaching w that one), & 43

Lol, yay! Also, pleeeeease scroll down my blog bc I answered a different ask of yours and you haven't given me a fake fic title yet—

I answered it with writing! It's short and you likely don't remember that ask, but I did!

This is loooooong so it's under a cut...

—

Irzayn:

2: Do they wear perfume/cologne? If so, what scents do they prefer?

He usually doesn't, but there's times when he goes to visit his mom that he'll use lavender or lilac scents since they were his mom's favorite and it hides the smell of blood. Vara also likes it, but knows better than to say anything about it.

5: Do they have any tattoos? If so, what are they and do they have any special meaning?

No. Even if he tried, the needles wouldn't go through his skin unless he admitted he was a dragon, and that will never happen. Vara has put those temporary ones on him before though.

6: If they were badly injured, and for whatever reason couldn't go to a hospital, who would they go to for help?

He actually can't get treated at a hospital at all, but...

No-one. He will try to hide it for as long as possible. Most of the time he heals it himself, but he will usually end up pinned down by Vara and receive forced treatment...if he was ever gravely injured he might actually try to talk to Quickvine (Hero version of Vara but he doesn't know, for anyone who doesn't know these two) as Voidshire (His villain self)

18: How easy is it to become their enemy?

Become??? Dude, the moment he lays his eyes on you you're considered a possible threat. Vara had to keep digging and digging at the exterior for a very long time to get anywhere with it! But honestly, you truly become an enemy the moment you do something he doesn't like, which...is a lot of things lol

35: Do they believe in fate or do they believe they are in charge of their own destiny?

He doesn't believe in either. He doesn't think destiny exists at all, and rather that you have to bash your way through other people to get anywhere in life. He's traumatized and if he did believe in destiny/fate, it would be that others are in control of yours and you have to shred them apart to take it back every day.

45: Do they plan in advance or just wing it?

Both! He has this entire planning board thing where he maps out the entire city and puts sticky notes all over it about guard/hero schedules, where traps are, and where what he wants is. From there he just dives in head first and doesn't look back, winging absolutely every last part of the actual attack.

—

Varazae:

2: Do they wear perfume/cologne? If so, what scents do they prefer?

Nope! Most are too strong for him and he also doesn't want to drive away animals bc he loves them. On another point, some of the plants he grows wouldn't react well to the change. He does like how lightly Irza puts on his when he actually does put some on.

6: If they were badly injured, and for whatever reason couldn't go to a hospital, who would they go to for help?

He may be outgoing and eccentric, but even he is cautious. He would go to relatives, the hero association, Irza, or as a last ditch effort, if he thought he'd die otherwise, he'd approach Voidshire and pray the villain doesn't kill him. (If only he knew the villain was in love with him lol)

8: Do they collect anything? If so, what and why?

Definitely! He collects fabric, seeds, and information!

He really likes practicing to sew bc of how much Irza always comes home with torn clothes, but the dragon can't sew to save his life. So while the skill is secondary to his cooking, he can still do it very well!

And seeds...is both bc he grows plants and wants to know more about them, but also bc he's trying to save Irza's mom from the parasitic seed inside of her.

Information is bc he feels like something is suspicious and he isn't super strong, so he wants to be prepared to protect himself from anyone, even other heroes.

16: Do they have or want kids?

He doesn't have any and doesn't care if he ever does, but he'd absolutely adore being able to raise a kid! Irza is constantly telling him he can't adopt random children or animals off the street!

18: How easy is it to become their enemy?

I'm not really sure he even understands what an enemy is lol. It would take something extreme for him to think you're an enemy...bc even when he gave Irza those scars way later in that betrayal arc, he still never thought of that dragon, his best friend, as an enemy. It actually takes until a certain event way later for him to think of even Ezephr, one of the most twisted people in the story, as an enemy.

36: Would they ever kill someone? Have they already?

...yes.

But who? (secrets I shall not tell)

He's not as pure as you thought.

38: What are their dreams like? Do they have any recurring dreams/nightmares?

He has nightmares a lot. Mainly of losing his family or Irza, and actually after first meeting Voidshire he has nightmares about the villain slaughtering everyone in his life for a while. Those nightmares are one reason why he'll sometimes sneak into Irza's bed at night for comfort.

48: How likely are they to go on a quest for revenge?

He won't. He believes that karma will strike them down instead, and it always does...

Buuuuut he does tag along with Irza to help the dragon with his own revenge and mainly to keep killing to a minimum.

—

Ezephr:

5: Do they have any tattoos? If so, what are they and do they have any special meaning?

He's got a tattoo on the back of his neck with his lab number. It's why he keeps his hair so long, to hide it. The only meaning it serves is to haunt him and drive him even further insane.

11: Do they have any addictions?

Not unless his...violent tendencies count

17: How easily would they be convinced to do something that goes against their morals?

19 (reaching w that one): How easy is it to become their friend?

(yes, yes you are) It's not possible. The stalker situation with Irzayn where he shreds the guy apart all the time but doesn't kill him is as close as you can get.

43: Can they handle stressful situations?

He is the definition of stress, nothing stresses him out, so I guess yes? Usually he's the one causing the stress.

—

Ask game!

Feel free to send me asks on this whenever!

[berrieluv]

Shaving.

I'm sorry for writing this, it was a thought I had and I couldn't be in peace if I didn't write, my apologies.

Sirius Black x Plus Size!Reader. Summary: Sirius wants to help you to shave your pussy. TW. Characters are +18, modern AU, kinda sub Sirius?, mentions of pubic hair, reader doesn't like pubic hair, pussy kisses (? idk if that's a thing), mentions of Jegulus and Marlene x Lily. I was dying to use this photo.

I DO NOT SEE/DESCRIBE READER AS THE GIRL IN THE PICTURE.

Sirius found himself bored.

Even though everyone had much things to do, he would simply do what he feels like it. He wasn't dumb enough to spend hours and days studying for a test (he could get an approving grade without trying) but he sure wasn't enough of a nerd to spend hours and days studying (he knew he could never get straight A's as Lily, Remus, Regulus and his girlfriend do), but he and James were fine with just getting on the next grade.

Unlike him, James and Marlene (who parted ways with so each one could go and annoy their partner, trying to see who, between Regulus, Lily and you would get tired first and kick them out of the room) you were concentrated on your books, trying to get the best grades for every class you were taking.

"Baaaaaaby"

You heard Sirius crying, entering to the room. Your eyes were still fixated on your book and your tiny notes along side.

"Baby, please, listen to me"

You finally look up at his pleading tone of voice. You smiled when your eyes catch him, he was the prettiest boy you've ever seen (Sometimes you would tell him Remus was so you could piss him off. He would get extremely jealous, in a really, really childish way, because you used to have a crush with Remus and both of you had your fun back in your single days, which reminds unknown by Sirius or anyone. Jealous Sirius was the most adorable thing ever, but that's another topic). Sirius had cut his hair a few weeks ago, now it had started to grow and part of it was obstructing his face, like bangs, but he hated when you would tell him about his bangs.

"Yes?"

Sirius pouts at you for using that tone.

"Why do you hate me?" You sigh, knowing where this was going, and deciding not to put any more attention on him your eyes are back on your book, his reaction was pouting even more. "Looooooooove, please. Pay attention to me"

"You're such a whore attention, did you knew that, Sirius Orion Black"

He smiles and nods when you finally get up from your desk. Sirius opens his arms when he sees you walking to him, you hug him in response.

"I miss you so, so much"

"Sirius, we haven't been away for more than two hours this past days"

"Pleeease" He pleads, gaining a confused look from you. "Let me be inside of you"

You start to shake your head, laughing "No way"

"Why?"

"I'm working on my assignments" You quickly answer, going back to your desk "And I haven't shave"

Sirius pouts even more, looking adorable, he looks at you with puppy eyes and leans in your desk, his chest obstructing your book and you look at him with a smile. He wouldn't be insisting any more into you cockwarming him, he knows how much you hate to do anything sexual when you haven't shave, no matter how much he would tell you that pubic hair really doesn't bother him, you wouldn't allow anything to happen when it's too far from the day you shaved and too near from your shaving day.

Being your number one simp and fan, Sirius knew like the palm of his hand your period calendar along with your shaving calendar. So, being Saturday 13th, twenty days far from the day he knew you shaved, he knew you will have to do it between today and tomorrow.

"Let me shave you"

You look at him, now confused, and kinda disgusted. You didn't know why but to think about Sirius, your boyfriend, or any past person who was involved with you sexually, seeing you hairy would send a sensation of discomfort and disgust.

"No"

"Baby, please"

"No, Sirius"

"I knew you didn't love me no more"

"Sirius, stop"

"Pleeeeease, let me shave you, baby"

"No" You look at him, pushing him gently from your desk "Now shut up"

Sirius looks at you in silence for a second.

"I'll do all the steps you do" He pleads "I'll put your creams, your soap, everything"

Would it be that bad to give it a try? You really hated to shaved, but you hated even more pubic hair so that's basically what has got you through all this days.

"Fine"

That fine sounded more like a question than an affirmation but it was enough for Sirius, who ran to your bathroom to get all your stuff into that little car you first bough for books but ended being more useful for skin care.

"But I'm gonna keep studying"

Sirius nots and goes into the bathroom again, getting your towel to put it on the little couch you had in your room, placing it gently and instructing you to sit, you obey him, taking your book with you and getting off your pants and underwear before sitting.

You tried to not think about the hair. It wasn't an insecurity for you, you just hated it so much it was insane. So you concentrated on your book, glancing at Sirius who seemed really concentrated every now and then.

"You know how to start?" He shakes his head with a cute little smile, getting first your chemical exfoliant to start preparing the skin gently. "You ask me if you need to know something, deal?"

"Of course, love"

You smile at him and go back to your book. A few minutes later you couldn't process a single word the book has printed in it. You were totally obsessed with Sirius working on your pussy. If someone would tell you that your future and first official boyfriend would be shaving your pussy you wouldn't believe it, not in a million years. But it was Sirius Black, the boy who could make you feel comfortable with just being there, who would never say something hurtful towards you and who would never dare to disobey you because he was totally enamored with you and he hated you seeing you mad or crying.

"Love, I need you to spread your legs a little bit more open. Your skin is obstructing the sides of your pussy"

You laugh at the petition, gaining a look from him, smirking when he notices you have leave your book aside.

It was easier to just say that the fat in your tights was the one obstructing the way, but Sirius grew up with the idea that the word "fat" was bad, and insult, and the last thing he wanted was to insult you, and even though you have tell him, "fat" wasn't a bad word, and you didn't see it as one, he would still be very nervous to call you that.

He loved your fat, let's be honest. There was nothing more that Sirius loved than being trapped between your tights, or your belly when he would give you butterfly kisses, causing the extra skin on your belly to shake.

You jump a little when he tries to shave the curve between the tights and the pussy, failing on maneuver the razor and causing a little cut. Sirius looks at you totally scared when he sees the the red thread of blood going out.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so, so, so sorry, my love. I'm really sorry, I-"

"Sirius, it's fine. It was just an accident"

"But I hurt you, that was so irresponsible of me, I'm the worst boyfriend ever, I'm sorry, darling, I'm- Please don't hate me" He cries "Don't leave me away from your pussy"

You laugh at the last sentence and grab Sirius chin to pull him near to you for kiss.

"It's fine, Sirius, really. It happens too often to me"

After the kiss, Sirius looks at you with puppy eyes.

"Can I go on?"

"Did you finish already" He shakes his head slowly "Then go on, prince"

Sirius smiles shyly and goes back to his job. Kissing your tights in the place where he cut you.

"I'm sorry" He says, still looking at your pussy.

"I told you it's fine, Siri"

"I'm not talking to you" He says, incensed at your voice, going back to talking to your pussy a few seconds after. He leaves a kiss near to your clit, in the parts where he has already shaved. "Gotta treat my pretty pussy right. I wouldn't want her to get hurt, do I?" He speaks in a childish voice and you just laugh. "No, of course I don't want that, you're my favorite thing"

Almost twenty minutes later, Sirius finishes. He already applied your creams and everything.

"You need a cotton pantie, love"

"Mmh?"

"So it doesn't tickles"

"Oh, yeah, yeah" You say, getting out of your head, where your only thought was Sirius, concentrating in your pussy and only your pussy. Sometimes in you. You would jump sometimes to make him worry only for him to apologized to between your tights. "I'll go get them"

"No, my love. I'll go. I need my pussy to rest"

[intheticklecloset]

Circuit Breaker (My Hero Academia)

Primary Universe

@veryblushyswitch​ Sounds like a perfect opportunity to combine a couple of requests if you ask me! Also a beautiful excuse to write some KamiJirou! I love these two together and thanks to both of these prompts I was able to write a fic that featured this couple! Hope you like it!

~

“Kaminari!”

“Whaaaaat?”

“You can’t just sneak up on me like that!” Kirishima tried to sound indignant, but it was difficult when he was grinning so big. He had his arms wrapped protectively around his torso after his friend had surprised him with extremely ticklish electric shocks to his ribcage.

Kaminari smirked. “I can, I did, and I’m definitely going to again. Can’t stop me, Kiri.”

Kirishima scoffed and turned his back, waving a hand. “Yeah, yeah – AIEEE!!” He shrieked and wrenched himself out of Kami’s radius, stumbling back with an even wider smile now. “Again?!”

“You turned your back!” Kaminari laughed, wiggling his fingers with tiny sparks of electricity shooting from them. “I can’t help it if you’re really that naïve.”

“Go pick on someone else,” Kirishima laughed, backing up with his eyes still on Kami this time. “Try out your ticklish shockwaves on Midoriya; I’m sure he’d love that.”

Denki chuckled, letting his friend get away for the moment, glancing around the dorm. Midoriya, huh? It would be fun to try it on him…but it would be even more fun to try it on a lot of people!

Thus the electric hero’s tirade began. As suggested by Kiri, he started with Deku, sneaking up behind him and graciously waiting for the boy to set down his stack of heavy books before grabbing onto his sides and igniting his quirk just the tiniest bit – enough to send a strong, ticklish jolt through him and make him shriek just as Kiri had.

“K-Kaminari?!” he cried once he’d turned around, covering his mouth, looking surprised and embarrassed by how loud he’d just been. “What was that?”

“Just trying out a new use for my power,” Denki replied with a confident grin. He wiggled his fingers. “Turns out the tiniest bit of electricity can be really ticklish if activated in the right spots. Want to see?”

“I-I-! N-No, thank you, I’m – I’m good!” Deku stammered and blushed, nearly tripping over himself in an effort to back up. “M-Maybe…some other time?”

Kaminari smirked. “I’ll hold you to that, Midoriya.”

After that, he started trying it on anyone he came into contact with on a regular basis. Sero, Mina, Ojiro…he even got lucky and was able to try it on Bakugou once. The blonde had shouted and cursed, but with determination Denki was able to wrestle him into a kind of bear hug and ignite the ticklish sparks on his stomach, forcing his angry friend to laugh for a few seconds before he broke the hold and then yelled at him for a solid minute.

Tokoyami was an interesting subject. He actually wasn’t intending to try it on him, but then curiosity killed the cat and he was able to manage a poke – just a poke – to the teen’s side. Tokoyami hadn’t made a loud noise like the others, but he had jumped out of his chair and whipped around to glare at him. That was an interesting note for later, Kami thought.

Finally, however, he decided he had to try it on the girl that – as it turned out – would bring about the end of his reign of ticklish terror and take the throne for herself.

Jirou was sitting outside, flipping through a notebook and jotting things down when Denki passed by the back doors and saw her out there. He glanced around to see if any others were about. When the coast seemed clear, he smirked and joined her, plopping down beside her.

“Hey, rockstar,” he said. “What are you working on?”

Jirou blinked at him in surprise. “Um…just jotting down some lyrics.”

“Writing another song?”

“Well, yes,” she replied hesitantly, closing her notebook. “But I don’t think I’ll perform this one.”

“Oh?”

“It’s just for me.”

He smiled at her. “What’s it about?”

Jirou gave him a withering look. “It’s just for me, Denki.”

“Aw, come on,” he whined, though internally he was elated. She’d walked right into this; he didn’t even have to be random about it this time. “You can tell me.”

“I don’t want to – hey!” Jirou yelped when he reached for her sides. “What do you t-thihink you’re dohohoing?!”

“Pleeeeeease tell me?” he begged, not using his quirk just yet. It was satisfying enough to tickle her normally for the moment. “Pleeeeease, Jirou?”

“You mohohohoron!” she laughed, though it seemed only half-forced. “Stohohohop!”

“If you don’t tell me, I’ll tickle it out of you~” he teased. Then – to his surprise – he felt fingers tickling him instead, making him spurt out a giggle. “Gah! Whahahat the--?”

Jirou smirked, shoving him away from her, digging into his sides and ribs. “Two can play at that game, you know.”

“H-Hehehehehey!” Kaminari found himself quickly losing composure as she pushed him back, now looming over him with her fingers still attacking him. “Dohohohohon’t! Plehehease, I’m reheheheally ticklish!”

“Should have thought of that before you tried to tickle me.” Jirou smiled down at him, moving her hands up into his underarms. “Besides, I know you’ve been trying out your quirk on people the last couple of days, and I am not about to be your latest experiment.”

“Whahahahahat? Whohohoho told you thahahahahat?”

“Don’t know if I should say. You might just seek revenge on them for it.”

“Y-Yohohohohou behehehet I am!” Denki squealed when one hand traveled down to squeeze at his hip. “Gahahahahaha, please, stohohohohohop!”

“Nope.” Jirou grabbed at one of his knees when it came up to kick the air. “You started—”

“NOHOHOHOHO!!” Kaminari suddenly exploded with laughter, his legs kicking more frantically now, pulling his knee from her grip. “Nohohohohot thehehehere, please, I’ll dohohohoho anythihihihing!”

Jirou stared at him incredulously, then grinned and quickly straddled his calves, effectively pinning him in place while she reached forward to squeeze at his knees again. When he tossed his head back and let out a loud scream of laughter, she laughed along with him. “Well that didn’t take much, did it, sparky?”

“PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE JIROU!!” He begged, flopping around helplessly as she kneaded into the sides of his knees. “STAHAHAHAHAHAHAP I’M SORRYEHEHEHEHEHE!!”

She tilted her head. “Hmm…are you, really?” Her voice was contemplative and teasing. “I don’t know, Denki. How do I know you aren’t just saying that?”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! FINE, I’M NOHOHOHOHOHOT SOHOHOHOHORRY!!” Kami admitted, his face turning from pink to red the longer she focused on that spot. “BUT I P-PROHOMISE I WOHOHOHOHON’T TIHICKLE YOU IF YOU LEHEHEHEHEHET ME GO!!”

“Ha! Bargaining now, are we?” Jirou laughed, sliding her fingers to his knee pits and digging in there.

“NO – CRAP – OH GOHOHOHOD NOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!!” Kaminari laughed so hard and so loud it sounded more like was being murdered than tickled. He tried to push himself up to shove her away but was too weakened by his own hysterics to do anything more than squirm. “NOT THEHEHEHEHEHERE JIROU PLEHEHEHEHEHEHEASE!! I’M SEHEHEHEHEHERIOUS!! STAHAHAHAHAHAHAP!!”

“You sound serious,” she teased, though she did notice the air around him beginning to spark a little.

“AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!” The more she tickled, the more Kami laughed, and the more he laughed, the more he felt himself losing control of his quirk. “PLEHEHEHEHEHEASE I’M G-GOHOHOHOHOHONNA BLOW A FUHUHUHUHUHUSE!! JIROU!!”

Noticing the air around him growing more and more charged with each shrieking laugh she forced from him, Jirou finally stopped and allowed him to catch his breath. Denki gasped and let out some leftover giggles, his face dark red and eyes bright with unshed mirthful tears. “Th-Thank you…”

“Don’t relax just yet,” Jirou warned, smirking when she saw him look at her with horror. “I never said I’d let you go.”

“B-But…if you tickle me too much I’ll—”

“You’ll blow a fuse. I saw.”

He stared at her, eyes widening when she slid her hands beneath the legs of his sweatpants to make direct contact with the skin of his knee pits and scribble there lightly. Instantly he dissolved into hysterical giggles, falling back and clenching his teeth in a bright smile.

“But that doesn’t mean I can’t still tickle you. I’ll just have to go about it differently.”

“Jihihihirou,” Denki whined through his laughter. “Why?”

“Because you deserve it for being such a punk.” Jirou smiled at winked at him. “And because you’re totally adorable like this.”

Kaminari felt himself blush so hard the heat of it reached the tips of his ears, and between how flustered he was and the gentle, unbearable tickling, he found he could do nothing at this point except lay there and giggle and hope she’d have mercy on him soon.

Jirou’s smile widened. Denki may have been annoying at times and was definitely one to push buttons, but he’d also been the one to help her come out of her shell and follow her second passion for singing all the way to the stage during the festival. Between that and having him like this – giggly and blushy and begging her to tickle him anywhere else but there – she felt that her heart was full, and she didn’t know if she’d ever be able to stop making him smile like this.

Meanwhile, Denki Kaminari swore he’d never try to tickle her again.

Well…unless he really, really wanted to. Which he knew he did. So basically, he was doomed to constantly be at her mercy.

But he could live with that.

[recurring-polynya]

Tokusatsu Au where Rukia plays the lead actress in a superhero action show. Renji plays one of the villains and they are The most popular ship in the fandom. Bonus points if Orihime plays the main villain and loves every second of it.

This was the very first prompt I got, and I fell in love. Unfortunately, aside from a brief period of being grotesquely fascinated with Power Rangers as teen, I know almost nothing about tokusatsu. I did as much research as I could and I attempted to watch an episode of Kamen Rider, but my eyes glazed over halfway through. Anyway, please forgive my inaccuracies, I wrote this with my heart.

ao3 | ff.net

🏍    ⚡   🎬

“Uh, looks like we’re almost out of time,” the panel moderator for “High-Spirited Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe!: A Sneak Peak at Season 5” declared, “but would you be willing to take just a few audience questions?”

Head Screenwriter Kurosaki Ichigo glanced at Leading Actress Kuchiki Rukia out of the corner of his eye, and she gave a tiny nod.

“Yeah, sure!” he replied.

There was already a young woman waiting at the microphone, practically vibrating with anxiety. She was wearing a t-shirt that had ZabiTo4Ever!! handwritten in marker on it. Rukia knew, deep down in her bones, what the question was going to be.

“Hi, yes, hello, big fan of your work! My question is: are Tomoe and Zabimaru going to kiss this season?”

“No,” Rukia started to say.

“As you probably know,” Ichigo said loudly on top of her, “the show holds close to the core plot points of Kuna-sensei’s manga, although, because of her minimalist style, we do expand a lot of the dialogue and filler scenes. She has said in several interviews that High-Spirited Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe! is not a romance manga, so the odds of Tomoe and Zabimaru ever kissing on screen are very, very low.”

The young woman stared at Ichigo grumpily. “Does this also count Zabimaru’s secret college student identity, Satonako Takeru?”

Ichigo stared back at her. “Yes. It does.”

The next question came from a person wearing a full suit of HellKnight’s plasma armor made out of overlapping plates of cardboard. Rukia was kind of impressed by it. She wondered if he could sit down.

“Hi, Kurosaki-sensei, I am a huge fan of your work,” a voice emanated from deep within the cardboard. “I was wondering if you are influenced at all by fanworks, and if Episode 73: Pride is on the Line!: The Bake Sale Must Go On! was based in any way on the classic fanfiction, ‘Tell Me All Your Best Lies’? It’s the top story by kudos in the ZabiTo tag, which I might point out is the most popular shipping category on AO3.”

Ichigo cleared his throat gently. “I am contractually not allowed to read fanfiction, although I do enjoy fanart! There are some incredibly talented artists in the fandom, although for some reason, no one ever wants to draw pictures of Lead Screenwriters.”

“I’ll draw you, sleeping on the set like you always do,” Rukia offered, and that got a pretty big laugh. Rukia’s Tumblr of behind-the-scenes doodle comics was beloved among the fandom.

The next question was from a nonbinary person wearing a big poufy skirt and a hairstyle that would make their make-up and hair guru, Yumichika, sit up and take notice. “Hi, this is a question for Kuchiki-san! If the show is going to roughly keep pace with the manga, as it has done up until now, you should be shooting the storyline where Tomoe and Queen Bloodbuzz switch bodies later this year. I was wondering if you could comment on how you feel about filming that storyline?”

Finally! A good one! “Yes!” Rukia nodded eagerly. “I don’t usually like to speak for my fellow cast members, but Orihime and I are beyond excited about playing each other. We’ve been studying each other’s mannerisms and practicing already! Does anyone want to hear my Queen Bloodbuzz cackle?” She wagged her eyebrows as the audience cheered. “Here goes-- bwaHaHaHaHAHAHAHAAHAAAHAAAAAAAA!”

“Bonechilling,” Ichigo commented dryly as the audience erupted.

“Amazing, Kuchiki-san!” the moderator exclaimed. “I think there is time for one more, but this will be the last question!”

A tall girl in a full set of High-Spirited Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe motorcycle leathers stepped to the microphone. She was holding a notebook. “Hello!” she warbled. “In a 2020 interview with the Psychics and Sidekicks podcast, Abarai Renji was asked about his opinion on ZabiTo as a ship, and he replied,” she consulted her notebook, “‘Tomoe is such a cool lady and talented Battle Clairvoyant, and she always follows her heart and stays true to herself. I think that Zabimaru can’t help but be impressed with her, even though they’re enemies, and I always try to roll that into our on-screen interactions.’ I know that in the past you’ve refused to comment on the ship, but I was wondering if you had any thoughts on, y’know, his thoughts?”

“Well, he’s correct, of course, Tomoe is very cool and admirable,” Rukia replied, which drew a few laughs, although it seemed like the audience was leaning forward in anticipation of her answer. “Like I said, I don’t like to speak for other cast members. I’ll be doing a big cast panel with Abarai and Inoue and Matsumoto and Ukitake tomorrow afternoon, and I hope you all can make it! See you then!”

The moderator thanked them enthusiastically, and then Ichigo and Rukia slipped out the back guest entrance.

“Evasive as always, Kuchiki,” Ichigo teased.

“Whatever,” Rukia sniffed. “The higher ups say we’re not supposed to comment on stuff like that, and I was not commenting. By the way, how many secret fanfic accounts are you up to? Four?”

“It’s only three!” Ichigo paused. “I wrote that fanfic the guy brought up.”

“Of course you did,” Rukia sighed. “I do blame you personally for the popularity of the damn ship.”

“Me? Blame Kuna for making up two such sexy, emotionally constipated dumbasses!” Ichigo defended.

“Also, it’s not Ichigo’s fault that you and Abarai have insane chemistry.”

Rukia spun around, grinning. “Orihime!”

Rukia’s two co-stars, Inoue Orihime and Abarai Renji, the portrayers of Tomoe’s demonic archnemeses, stood in the hallway behind them.

“We sat in on your panel!” Orihime beamed. “You two were brilliant!”

“Don’t worry,” Renji added. “We were incognito.”

“Incognito” was relative, Rukia supposed, when you were at Tokyo’s biggest tokusatsu

convention.

Orihime was wearing a Zabimaru outfit so detailed that she probably could have won a prize down at the cosplay hall. She had the gravity-defying ponytail, the eyeliner, the insane widow's peak (complete with forehead tatts), the fangs, the motorcycle boots. The paper mache snake skull helmet was a little lopsided, but it was charming. She had her top zipped a little higher than canon, but that was forgivable, too.

Renji had taken the opposite tack of looking as much like a normal person-- or at least a normal Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe superfan-- as possible. Relaxed fit jeans and an oversized hoodie de-emphasized his ultra-fit physique. He was wearing a t-shirt with a very dramatic rendering of Orihime that said “Queen Bloodbuzz can step on me!” and a ball cap with the logo of Seireitei University, the fictional college Tomoe and Takeru attended.

“You think you’re in disguise,” Rukia pointed out, “but there are thousands of teen girls in this place with entire Tumblrs dedicated to your stupid face when you’re out of costume.”

Renji cocked an eyebrow at her. “You underestimate me, Rukia. I have bought… new sunglasses.” With a flourish, he whipped out a pair of the dorkiest wayfarers she’d ever seen, and flipped them onto his face. “I’ve disappeared! Who am I? Where am I?”

“You look really great, Orihime,” Ichigo said, his cheeks coloring a little bit. “Did you get Uryuu or Yumichika to help you with that costume?” In his continuing theme of doing things he wasn’t supposed to, Ichigo had finally started dating Orihime on the downlow around the time they finished up filming last season. It had done absolutely nothing for how shy he still got around her. They were, in Rukia’s opinion, cute as hell.

“Oh, no, that would be cheating!” Orihime replied, wagging a finger at him. “Well…maybe I did cheat, just a tiny bit. Renji helped me make the helmet and he held up references for me while I was painting on the tattoos.”

“Only the forehead ones,” Renji quickly added.

“He wouldn’t even offer feedback on my booby tattoos!” Orihime frowned. She leaned forward. “Rukia, how do they look?”

Ichigo turned even redder.

“Perfect, as in all you do!” Rukia replied loftily.

“What’s everyone got coming up next?” Renji asked. “I was thinking of slipping out and trying to pick up some real coffee.”

“I’m judging a villainess-themed cosplay competition,” Orihime chirped. “But I’m dying for a blueberry caramel iced latte. Renji, my henchman, pleeeeease!”

“Of course, my liege,” Renji replied in his Zabimaru voice.

It’s not like it had been a hard decision to accept the role of the motorcycle-riding, badass heroine of one of the most popular manga of the last decade, but it had turned out to be one of the best decisions of Rukia’s life. not just her career. Aside from a few of the money-obsessed executives, she liked nearly everyone in the cast and crew, but the fact that the fact that the ruthless, homicidal, literally Hell-spawned villains of the show were played by the two sweetest marshmallow people she had ever met just took the cake. Renji and Orihime had already known each other from some voicework they had done previously, and their excitement at working together on a live-action project had infected the entire cast from the start. Rukia wasn’t sure, but she strongly suspected that Renji was the one who had hyped Orihime up to ask Ichigo out.

“I have a writers’ workshop I’m moderating this afternoon, and I wanted to review the writing samples people sent in,” Ichigo said, scratching the back of his head. “I’d love to stop by that cosplay contest, though, at least for a few minutes.”

“You’ll be needing caffeine, too, then, eh?” Renji offered. “Hot, black, and in the largest cup they make, as usual?”

“Ugh, you’re the best,” Ichigo groaned. “You wanna power-up this season? Costume update? You know what? Maybe I’ll just have you defeat Tomoe once and for all, no one likes her anyway.”

“C’mon, you know I’m the world’s number one Tomoe simp, don’t do that!” Renji laughed.

Rukia rolled her eyes. “I’m free and I could use some fresh air. Besides, it’s going to take all your dumb muscles just to carry Kurosaki’s vat of coffee back here.”

“Cool!” Renji proclaimed. “We’ll be back soon!”

“Thanks, Renjiiiii!” Orihime waved.

“You need to stop off and put on a disguise?” Renji asked.

“No point in it, I always get recognized,” Rukia sighed, pulling her sunglasses out of her purse anyway.

“Here,” Renji said, plunking his hat on her head. “Maybe this will help.”

“Thanks,” Rukia replied, and then did a double take. “Whaaaaaat is on your head?”

“Shut up!” Renji laughed. He usually shaved his head when they were filming, because it made it easier to deal with the make-up and wigs, but since they were between seasons, he’d grown his hair out into a short, tousled mop of reddish-brown waves. He looked, for the lack of a better word, dreamy. “I shot a movie over the summer, and they wanted me to look softer.”

Rukia looked at him over the top of her sunglasses. “You didn’t tell me you were doing a movie!”

“Oh, it was just a little indy romcom thing. I wasn’t sure it was gonna pan out, I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it.”

“You were in a romcom? You’re kidding me!” They ducked out of a side door of the convention center into the bright sunshine.

“Yeah, it’s about a guy who goes to the gym to try to get ripped to impress a girl, and makes friends with me, this nice, already ripped dude who gives him lifting tips and encourages him a bunch. By the end of the movie, it turns out we have crushes on each other.”

“Oh, no, that sounds really cute, actually!”

“It was written by a woman who graduated from one of Ichigo’s writing workshops. The script was really snappy and Ichigo thought having someone like me as the gym guy would give it just a bit of campy cachet. You know what a good sense he’s got for stuff like that.”

“That was cool of you to go out on a limb a little,” Rukia replied.

Renji rubbed the back of his neck. “I’d been wanting to try something like that for a while, actually.”

Rukia blinked. “You aren’t… you aren’t thinking of leaving the show, are you?”

“Huh? No. No! No, the show means the world to me, I would never. But… it’s not gonna run forever, y’know?”

“I would have guessed you’d want to be a big action star or something!” Rukia said, throwing a few air punches. “That’s my dream!”

Renji stuffed his hands in the pockets of his hoodie. “Yeah, that’s what I thought I wanted when I first got into acting. I’d read the Tomoe manga, and I thought playing Zabimaru would be a good jumping-off point, besides just being a cool character overall.”

“Is that… not true?” Rukia frowned.

“Oh, I mean, I guess so! I didn’t really know about the fandom, though and… to be honest, I’m kinda into the idea that there are all these fans who think I’m complex and redeemable?”

Rukia regarded him out of the corner of her eye. “They just want to fix you.”

“Maybe! Ichigo made me read this one fanfic that was eight thousand words of the reader getting sick and Zabimaru making them soup? And feeding them the soup? I still haven’t decided how I feel about it.”

“How does he have time to find these things? Does he even sleep?”

“Anyway, it doesn’t hurt to be well-rounded and it was fun. I’m still mostly an action guy, but I wouldn’t mind doin’ something with a romantic subplot. A period drama or something like that. I look pretty good in hakama, you know.”

“I bet you do,” Rukia laughed. She squinted at him, but his expression was unreadable behind the shades. Renji didn’t have the classic leading man looks, not like her ridiculously famous older brother, but she could definitely see him as the best friend, the B-plot romance, with his cute, messy hair and that big doofy grin.

“By the way, I’m sorry you had to field that question about me spilling my romantic sensibilities on that podcast.”

Rukia laughed. “You didn’t even answer the question, either! These people are relentless!”

Renji stopped at a street corner and peered down the various possible directions they could go. “Which way feels like it might have a coffee shop?”

“You didn’t have one in mind before we left? I thought you knew where we were going!”

“Nah, I just like to go out and see what there is.”

“I can look up a map,” Rukia said, reaching in her bag for her phone.

“Let’s just go this way,” Renji said, stepping out into the street in the direction that had the WALK light. Rukia sighed and had to scramble to catch up with him.

“So, what do you think about it?”

“Huh?” Rukia asked. “Think about what?”

“Our ship. ZabiTo.”

“I can’t believe you just said that word out loud. And you know we’re not supposed to give our opinion on it!”

“Aw, c’mon, we’re not supposed to give public statements on our opinions. I don’t think there’s any harm in talking between ourselves. We’re in disguise, even.”

“‘Disguise’,” Rukia sniffed.

“You don’t like it, I can tell.”

“He’s a bad guy! Everyone always talks about chemistry, and that may be true, but I just don’t think that Tomoe could ever get over his acts of violence and cruelty.”

“Queen Bloodbuzz is cruel. Zabimaru is not cruel.”

“Okay, that’s fair, but still. He’s kidnapped just about all of Tomoe’s friends and or turned them into monsters at one time or another. He’s always setting Karakura Town on fire or flooding it with magic lizard goo. He ruined the sports festival.”

“Maybe the sports festival deserved to be ruined,” Renji muttered under his breath.

“Okay, you’ve got a point on that one,” Rukia admitted.

“It’s really clear though, that he’s got some agenda beyond just simping for Queen Bloodbuzz--”

“The simping for Queen Bloodbuzz is the most relatable thing about him, to be honest.”

“Granted. But, what if he’s got a good reason for everything he does, actually? What if he’s doing all of this against his own moral code as a means of infiltrating Hell itself and getting himself into a position of trust so that he can bring down the Lords of Hell from the inside?”

Rukia slipped her sunglasses down to the tip of her nose. “Does Kuna give you Zabimaru spoilers?” The reclusive creator High-Spirited Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe! was only barely involved with the television show, but she did privately meet with each of the cast members about once a year. Most of Rukia’s meetings consisted of Kuna giving her constructive criticism on her battle poses.

“No, mostly we practice sneering,” Renji replied. “But I gotta play the guy, so I gotta think about this, you know, what motivates him? I mean, you’re probably right, it would never work out. But unlike Tomoe, whose principles would call for her to ignore any attraction she has to him, Zabimaru has the freedom to pine for her, perhaps because his love is futile and he doesn’t think he deserves it anyway.”

“That’s kinda dark, dude,” Rukia frowned.

“Yes, well, that is the kind of character acting that netted me the 2019 Nickelodeon Kids’ Choice Best Villain Award, Foreign Language Category.”

“That’s literally what’s going through your head when you’re shouting that if I can’t make some sick motorcycle jump, you’ll turn all my friends into stuffed animal versions of themselves?”

“No, of course not! At those times I’m thinking about how much I love my job. OH! and what is that I see!” Renji struck an extremely Zabimaru pose. “A MISTER DONUT!”

“My hero!” Rukia exclaimed, unable to resist an opportunity to shout dramatically. “I’m sorry I doubted you!”

“I think we should get some donuts, too. Orihime loves donuts,” Renji declared.

“Oh, for sure,” Rukia agreed. She was thoughtful for a moment. It would be easy to move on to a different subject, the subject being donuts, but she wasn’t happy with leaving the last conversation hanging. “Look, Renji, just because I don’t like the dumb ship, you know that’s not a reflection on you, right?”

“Huh?” Renji replied. “You mean you don’t mind if I like it?”

“Well… I mean, I don’t, I guess, but what I really meant was, er… we joke a lot, but Tomoe and Zabimaru are just parts, y’know? Just because I don’t think Zabimaru isn’t good boyfriend material doesn’t mean I…” Rukia trailed off, suddenly realizing what she was saying. “Um. What I mean is. You’re very nice and probably one of my favorite people I’ve ever worked with and if someone I knew wanted to ask you out, I would definitely encourage them to, A+ guy, I’d say, probably would make a great boyfriend.”

Renji pushed his sunglasses up onto his forehead and regarded her for a long moment. “For the record, Kuchiki, I think that both you and Tomoe would make excellent girlfriend material.” While Rukia stood there and gaped like a fish, he turned and pushed open the door to the coffee shop. “Ichigo likes crullers and Orihime always wants the most colorful thing they’ve got. Do you know what you want?”

“I need to think about it,” Rukia squeaked. She wasn’t talking about donuts.

🏍    ⚡   🎬 

Bonus: Here are my notes from when I was making up the show. I hope this wasn’t too confusing!

High-Spirited Battle Clairvoyant Tomoe!

based on a manga by reclusive mangaka Kuna Mashiro

Head Screenwriter: Kurosaki Ichigo

🌟 Starring: 🌟

Kuchiki Rukia as Yukimura Tomoe, a spunky college student who can see ghosts and fights demons from Hell! She rides a motorcycle!

Inoue Orihime as Queen Bloodbuzz, a Lady of Hell, who seeks to gather energy from the Living Realm so that she can become the Supreme Ruler of Hell. Very aesthetic. Much bees.

Abarai Renji as Zabimaru, Queen Bloodbuzz’s ruthless henchman. He leads a double life as fierce-looking, but gentle-hearted college student Satonaka Takeru! What is his long game??

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-yigas]

Could we get another Miphlink/Yiga Husbands double date?? I can't get over how much I love the way you write them! 😅

Thank you! I do in fact, love writing them all, including Mipha, who is JUST precious! (also yes to that one anon, you’re getting that smut of them you wanted, I’m getting there. 20 asks don’t get responded to overnight).

“Mipha, lil’ red, how’ve you been?!”

Kohga and Sooga were invited to come over for another double date. It was Mipha’s turn to pick what to do, and she had a rather interesting idea; learning how to make drinks. That was it. Kohga might have thought something like clothes making, maybe even searching for seashells or watching Link do his training. Not that Kohga was complaining, he loved an excuse to drink. Mipha accepted his offer for a hug, just delighted to see him.

“Kohga, Sooga! My dear friends! How are you both?”

Mipha parted from the hug, and offered Sooga her hand. She learned a long time ago that he didn’t exactly enjoy touching women, so she always offered her hand, in case he didn’t want to be touched. He refused it this time around, lightly bowing his head in apology.

“I’m quite well, Lady Mipha. Didn’t think I’d be carrying so much alcohol on my back though.”

Kohga scoffed, arms folded across his chest.

“What? You expect ME to carry it?”

“No Master Kogha, I just-”

“Anyhow, he’s just whiny because it’s an indoor date. I’m SO ready to teach you how to make some drinks! Where’s your little boyfriend anyway?”

“He’s inside, helping me set out the snacks.”

Sooga cocked his head to the side.

“Should...you have left HIM near the food?”

She thought about it for a moment, and realized her mistake.

“Er...pardon me for a moment.”

She dashed back inside, and Kohga chuckled. Sooga looked down at Kohga, and he could NOT stop smiling. Kohga noticed it, and scowled.

“What’s so funny?”

“You call ME such a lovesick sap. Yet here you are, fawning over their love. You’re such a hypocrite.”

“You know what, get your ass inside, I’m not listening to you.”

Sooga chuckled as Kohga nagged him into talking inside. Mipha had her own room in Zora’s domain, but quite frankly, it was like a mini mansion. A giant bedroom, a kitchen, and a living room, all to herself. No doubt it was built for her purely because everyone LOVED her, not that she needed such space. Kohga liked it here though, it was DAMN pretty in here, even though red was his personal favorite color. Kohga closed the door behind them as he dipped his head into the kitchen. Mipha was scolding Link (if you would call her gentle ‘please save food for the guests’ scolding), when she seemed to just now notice them, smiling as she brought over bowls of snacks to the living room.

“Sorry, Link ate most of the fried salmon skins. He really does enjoy my cooking.”

Sooga gave a shake of his head.

“It’s alright, he may have them. Kohga always makes me shower after I eat fish.”

“Because that smell just does NOT go away! How am I supposed to cop a feel when you smell like a doc?”

Link didn’t have any complaints, grabbing the bowl and helping himself to the rest of the salmon skins, nodding at them both in a hello. Mipha chuckled, slightly shaking her head.

“So long as that isn’t an issue for anyone, I would’ve gladly made some more for you, Sooga.”

“Kind, but not needed Mipha, thank you. If I may though, can I put this bag down? I’d hate to accidentally break any bottles.”

“Oh yes, please, on the coffee table!”

Sooga nodded, going to the living room and putting the rather big back of alcohol down onto the table. Mipha brought a little cart full of snacks (including sauteed nuts, honey candies, meaty rice balls, bread and butter, tabantha bakes, and banana chips), pushing it right by the table before she sat down next to Link on one of the couches. Kohga whistled at the rather cute array of treats she had.

“You didn’t have to make so much, Mipha! That’s sweet of you, but I wouldn’t want you putting so much work into this.”

“You agreed to teach us all about making drinks, providing you food is the least I can do! I also have some cake in the fridge, in case we need something else sweet.”

“Ugh, you’re precious Mipha, you really are. Blondie, don’t lose this one, she’s a good one.”

Link nodded in determination, and in a way, Mipha found it adorable. Kohga started to take out the bottles from the pack, setting it all down. Now Kohga wasn’t an alcoholic by any means, but he did like having variety in his drinks, hence why he had QUITE the stock. Mipha leaned over to the tray of snacks, helping herself to a meaty rice ball. Even as she was stuffing her little face, she was being so neat about it, just as the princess she was. Sooga meanwhile, sat up straight and to attention, as usual, not letting himself relax.

“So, what drinks ARE we making today, Master Kohga?”

“Let’s start with Mipha’s. Ladies first and all of that. I know which one you like, I NEVER forget a drink order. Don’t think you’ve ever seen me make drinks actually, so this should be fun.”

Kohga was always fast when it came to making drinks of food. It took him pretty much only a minute to cut fruit, salt the rim (of course he brought his own glasses), pour the ice, juice, vodka and stir. Sure it was a simple drink, but the speed was nonetheless impressive. He handed her the glass, and she gladly accepted it, handing the rest of her rice ball to Link. She took a sip, and although she tried to hide it, he could tell she enjoyed it, based on the way her lips curled into a little bit of a smile.

“I always thought it was so much more complicated than that, quite frankly.”

“Honestly, ANY drink is easy, once you know what you’re doing. Sooga, your turn big guy.”

“I don’t think we packed wine.”

“We didn’t, because that’s boring. That, and I like the fact that you watch my hands when I make these.”

Kohga nudged him with his shoulder, trying and failing not to grin. Sooga knew he was right, he LOVED watching him make things. Be it food, drinks, or...well, anything really. Kohga dug into the bag, pulling out a bunch of stuff. Sooga cocked his head to the side, curious.

“Wait, what are you making-”

“Shh, you’ll like it, trust me.”

In a tall glass, Kohga poured a container of some kind of syrup, adding some wild berries right after. He mashed them up, added a bit of some red liquid, and topped it off with ice cream, and a dash of soda. Sooga picked up the glass, inspecting the rather colorful drink.

“What...is this?”

“It’s a float, just try it. I even made it low alcohol, because you’re a pansy.”

Sooga gave it a sip, and slowly nodded, finding himself rather liking it.

“That’s quite nice, actually. Sweet, but bitter. How did you get the ice cream to stay-”

“Don’t ask questions, and just enjoy. Meanwhile, let’s get to refilling your glass Mipha, you’re all ice over there.”

Mipha looked down at her glass, lightly shaking her head.

“Oh no, I couldn’t possibly. One is more than enough.”

“Come on, you ain’t swimmin’ anywhere. Just one more?”

Mipha hesitated, but chuckled in defeat, handing him her glass.

“Alright. But just one more, then that’s it.”

“Atta girl!”

He chuckled, gladly setting her up with another drink. He had to at this point, who wouldn’t make a drink for their hostess? Especially with the way the snacks seemed to slowly be disappearing. Kohga rested his chin on his hand as he looked at Link.

“Now...what would YOU like, I wonder. Don’t think I’ve ever seen you drink, Goldilocks.”

Link gave a shake of his head, stuffing his face full of buttered bread. Kohga thought about it, before snapping his fingers.

“Wait, I got just the thing for you!”

Link had only just recently become of drinking age, so he wasn’t exactly a booze hound. Not a problem, Kohga catered to anyone and everyone, experience be damned. Kohga started to two different kinds of rum, some vodka, lemonade, and some black currant cordial. He mixed it all together, and slid it over to Link.

“Like it? It’s a ‘pink fairy’. Seems like something you’d like. Bit on the strong for some, but hey go big or big home. Now drink, drink!"

Link took a sip, lightly shaking his head after his sip. Kohga chuckled, leaning over and patting him on his pretty blonde head.

"You'll get used to it, blondie. Just-"

"Link, drink swap."

Mipha traded their drinks (with hers definitely having a lot less), and Link more or less accepted the swap. Mipha chuckled after taking a sip, leaning over to pinch Link's cheek.

"It's adorable, your first drink! You're just. So cute, Link."

Link's face erupted in blush, and he rubbed the back of his head, shy boy he was. Sooga pulled out his Sheikah slate as Kohga made his own drink (banana hammock, obviously), and started to play a song, playing it at a reasonable volume. Mipha seemed pleased as the music played, and she squealed, grabbing onto Link’s arm and flailing her legs wildly.

“Link! Oh I LOVE this music! You HAVE to dance with me! Please please pleeeeease!”

Drunk Mipha was a TOTAL dance bunny, and paired without the usual shyness, it was adorable, honestly. Link finished whatever was left of the drink, and nodded. Link was never one to tell his girl no, and it showed. They both got off of the couch, choosing to get up and dance together. The music wasn’t quick, wasn’t slow, but it enough to give a relaxed party vibe to the room, and Kohga couldn’t help but chuckle, nursing his drink as he watched his drunk little fishy get her groove on.

“You did that on purpose didn’t you?”

“I have no idea what you mean. I just like a little postmodern music. Nice tune.”

“Sap.”

“Enabler.”

They both had a chuckle at that, sitting back and watching these two idiots. Drunk Mipha had a little swagger to her, and Link knew fairly well how to dance. Enough so, he managed to dip her, just to kiss her on her forehead.

“That’s bullshit cute. Can’t say I blame her, boys got moves. He-”

He didn’t get to finish his sentence as Mipha started to tug at his arm, chuckling and swaying in place.

“Come on you two! Can’t just be me and Link up here! Dance with me Kohga!”

“Hey, if you wanna look bad, your funeral, fishy!”

Kohga tossed back the rest of the drink, before trading Link, and getting his chance to dance with Mipha. Link watched Mipha nearly giggle herself half to death, before he offered his hand to Sooga. He rolled his eyes, taking another sip of his drink.

“I suppose Kohga would just scold me if I refused. Alright.”

He accepted his hand, and joined him right next to Mipha and Kohga. It was half hearted, not very well done dancing, but that didn’t matter. All that mattered was that they were having fun, chuckles and giggles moving around the room, just as much as their feet were. Even Sooga had to admit; he was having fun. He swapped partners with Kohga, now dancing with a very enthusiastic Mipha. Thankfully, he wasn’t scared enough to NOT twirl the little princess in place, catching her before her dizziness nearly made her fall to the floor. She cared not at all, laughing it off rather loudly.

“Ha! You’re just like Link! Ever the sweetheart, Sooga.”

“I’d say he’s a lot more like Kohga, quite frankly.”

He chuckled, glancing over at Kohga and Link, who were having just WAY too much fun together. Mipha giggled, getting herself to stand back up.

“You love Kohga SO much, oh my GOD its so sweet. I cry thinking about you guys sometimes, it’s SO sweet. You guys NEED to get married. I wanna see it, so bad.”

“Kohga WOULD look good in a dress, I agree.”

“Thought that’d be you. You have the tits for it.”

“...pardon-”

“Oh switch time!”

Their partners swapped, and suddenly Kohga was in his arms. Not that he had any complaints. Kohga laughed as he held onto Sooga, still keeping in tune to the song.

“Good call on the swap, any longer and I might’ve stolen her mans. I’m telling you, he’s into me.”

“Not anymore than me, Master Kohga.”

“Is that a fact?”

“Absolutely. I can prove it too.”

Sooga leaned down, parted their masks a bit, and pressed his lips against Kohga’s. It was a sweet, tender moment between them, and even though it wasn’t an outdoorsy date, Sooga wouldn’t trade it for anything.

“Link!-”

They both turned to watch Link trip over himself, sending himself falling on top of Mipha, who fell backwards onto the couch. They both shared a laugh, and it was tender, watching Mipha hold onto Link’s face as she did.

“Oh...you’re a big, silly man, Link. I love you. You and your soft face, and your big elephant ears.”

They both snorted at that, forehead pressed together. Sooga looked down at Kohga, who was clearly amused at them both.

“Kohga?”

“Hmm?”

“Did you...think it would end up like this?”

“Well yeah, they’re nuts for each other-”

“No. I mean...everything. Us being together, the world being as perfect as it is now. Did you see that coming?”

“...no. But you know, I’m really glad things ended up how they did. All of it.”

Kohga put his hand into Sooga’s, chuckling. There was a sweet, blissful moment of tenderness between them, before Sooga spoke again.

“You want to grab everything in the fridge and leave them be?”

“Absolutely, been thinking about the cake this whole time.”

[irwintry]

Wowwww and we do #43 and #51 with Cal pleeeeease?

ooooooooo yes sorry this took so long! it’s not exactly how i planned to write it 

#43 “You have no idea how much I want you right now.”

#51 “You make me feel alive.”

-

Calum had stormed into your home without warning. 

“It’s unbelievable! Unbe-fucking-lievable. I just––I don’t get it. We broke up, what, a year ago? And I’ve been fine without her. Seriously, I’ve been fine! And then she meets this guy six months later, falls in love, and gets fucking married? She can’t be serious, Y/N. This can’t be happening. People don’t still do that, right? They don’t fucking get married after six months of knowing the person. Love doesn’t just happen like that.”

“Calum.” You sighed, hoping your voice would steady his pacing. You were sat there at your couch with a bowl of potato soup; the movie Casablanca played softly on the TV.

He only glanced at you for one burning moment. “Married. Not just engaged. Fucking married. And they didn’t even elope! Just got married. Jesus.” He groaned and rubbed harshly at his face. “I’m happy for them. I-I mean her. I don’t know the other asshole. I’m happy for her. Truly. She was nice and sweet, and I loved her, but God––six months. She didn’t even wanna get married when we were––holy shit, she told me she didn’t want to get married.”

You raised an eyebrow as Calum plopped onto the couch beside you. 

“She said she didn’t wanna get married,” he repeated. “Said it wasn’t what she wanted. So, I just said it wasn’t what I wanted either. Fuck, but that’s not true.” He hugged a pillow to his chest. “She just didn’t wanna marry me. She didn’t wanna marry me. Why didn’t––” Calum glanced over at you, his eyes brimming with tears while the muscles in his face relaxed. “Why didn’t she wanna marry me?”

“Oh, Cal.” You sat closer to him, and once a few of the tears slipped down his cheeks, you tugged him into a hug. 

“I didn’t even wanna marry her,” he said. “B-but, she didn’t wanna marry me.”

“Anyone would be lucky enough to be with you, Cal,” you replied, pulling back to barely look at him. He was too close for you to see his eyes. “Anyone would be lucky to marry you. She just knew she didn’t deserve you.”

“She didn’t love me.”

“No, Calum––”

He sat back. “How would you know if she loved me?”

You shrugged, but you felt defeated. You felt like your voice was hopeless. “I don’t know,” you whispered. “I just saw the way she looked at you.” Because I know it’s the same way I look at you. 

Calum’s lip trembled, and he glanced back down at his trembling hands. “Can I––can I tell you something?”

“Anything, Cal,” you said, setting your hand on his back. “You can tell me anything.”

He nodded and swallowed, almost as if the words had gotten stuck in his throat. He let out a shaky breath. “You have no idea how much I want you right now,” he said. 

You tried not to react. You tried not to let the stinging in your heart distract from his words. The warmth of his body heat burned your hand. 

“But I’m just a fuckin’ idiot,” he continued. “I’ve ruined all of my chances. I always ruin everything. Because I look at you, and I think well, you’re my best friend. I’m supposed t’see you as my best friend. And for years, I’ve shut down all of these thoughts because fuck, you’re my best friend! And best friends don’t––”

Calum sighed. “They don’t ruin a good friendship over shit like this.”

“Shit like what?”

“This!” he exclaimed, hands flying and tears fleeting with the sound of his voice. “Me complain’ about my ex’s fucking wedding when I don’t even give a shit. I’m just jealous and mad. Jealous because I’ve waited my whole life to find a love that just fits. The kind of love you have when you know you wanna be with someone for the rest of your life. And mad because––hell, I broke up with her. I said we should see knew people, and she did! Married the fuckin’ arse. A-and I didn’t. Because I’ve been too stuck on you for the past three years.”

You closed your eyes slowly, secretly wishing you were caught in a cruel dream. But when you opened your eyes again, reality was still there to greet you. “You...you’ve been...”

“Stuck on you,” he said. “In love with you. You name it. I just love everything about ya. I’m myself with you. You make me feel alive, a-and I couldn’t admit it to myself. Took my stupid ex getting married to make me realize that the only goddamn person I’d ever wanna spend forever with is you. I didn’t wanna marry her because deep down, I just always wanted it to be you. Always thought it would be you.” 

A few tears had slipped down your cheeks as well. The manner of his confession was unlike you had imagined it in daydreams. But, then again, it was very alike to Calum. 

“I just––” He sniffed. “I just want you. Wanna love you and grow old with you. Stupid stuff like that.” 

You couldn’t find the right words to say, but you couldn’t sit there in silence any longer. You rested your hand against his wet cheek, smiling through the warmth of your own while the surreal became real. Once you leaned in to kiss him, Calum was smiling, too. 

[bigskydreaming]

How do you think the major DC/Batfam events would of happened if editorial hadn't stopped the DicKory wedding and they've just been a couple this whole time?

Oh god.

I don’t even know. But now I desperately WANT to know, and like, why has nobody ever written this story lmao nm we all know why.

But for starters, none of the stuff with Blockbuster, Tarantula, etc would have played out at ALL the same...assuming Dick was ever even IN Bludhaven, like, if he and Kory had married, why would they have left the Titans and not still been in New York, y’know? (Bonus! Dick never ever ever ever ever became a cop!)

But then too there’s the stuff that happened with Kory’s homeworld and her responsibilities to her people when they were refugees......no matter how much Dick had tying him to Earth at the time, this is not even just his girlfriend anymore, this is his WIFE, dealing with the potential end of her entire people....there’s NO way he’s gonna wait at home and expect her to go off and deal with that all on her own, he’s like no, I’m going with you, this is our ‘in sickness and health,’ let’s not argue about this when we could be using that time to travel instead, your people need us.

Jason’s return would have played out dramatically differently IMO, because as long as Dick was around and present in any capacity at the time, I think Dick would be in a LOT better place, a lot more centered here....and no matter how paranoid or pessimistic Bruce might have been about Jason at times, Dick would have had Kory there to counter that, and point out and remind him of all the things he loved about Jason, all the ways he KNEW Jason, no matter how much they both had changed....because Kory would remember that sweet kid who was so eager to go help the Titans save his big brother and she’d have just enough emotional distance and objectivity from her in-laws’ issues to be able to keep THAT image of him front and center and make sure to remind Dick of it too.

Ma’ri would likely have been born by the time Damian came along, assuming her birth happened around the same time most of the other OG Titans became parents, with Cerdian and the twins as well, and Lian already being a toddler....maybe even Jake might have been born by now too....

Which would have created a whole different dynamic as Damian would have been raised that year Bruce was gone by both Dick AND Kory, had a father figure AND a mother figure to compare not just his later relationship to Bruce to, but his relationship with Talia too as well.....not feeling as lacking or insecure by whatever choices Talia made in regards to him, assuming that most of the rest of DC events and choices other than Dick and Kory stay relatively the same and DC sucks at writing her. Its likely Damian never dies.

Before that point, again during the year Bruce was gone....things could have gone dramatically differently, smoother for the entire family just by virtue of Dick having Kory’s support and could bounce things off her as a sounding board the way he didn’t have anyone at the time.....the transition of Robin to Red Robin could have gone a lot smoother and with less resentment, Dick might have had the mental and emotional SPACE and presence of mind to be a lot more understanding of Tim’s insistence Bruce was alive instead of just focused on the pain he’d feel if he gave into temptation and believed Tim only to have those hopes crushed later down the line. Again, in this AU I’d posit that due to Dick and Kory never breaking up, Dick never grows distant from the Titans period, which makes it all the more likely they’d have remained a constant presence in his life at this time and he’d have been more willing and trusting about relying on them to help out in Gotham, because the way he did things wasn’t the way Bruce did things and that was always a strength in the past, they’re different men, they have different approaches and trying to do things the way the other did was NEVER going to work for Dick or be to his advantage.

All of which means Dick had help and OPTIONS for dealing with Jason and getting through to him, that is, if he wasn’t already closer because of how differently his initial return had gone down. Cass likely wouldn’t be in Hong Kong, because she’d have more reason to be around if it wasn’t just her and her brothers and Babs (who wasn’t even IN Gotham by that point). I’ve always headcanoned though that Cass and Kory would get along GREAT, and be really close, and again, if Ma’ri and potentially Jake are already born by that point, no way Aunt Cass is leaving her niece and nephew behind in this trying time in particular.

And then again, maybe Steph never died or was believed dead either, because War Games didn’t play out the same with Dick not in Bludhaven and with Kory’s potential intervention.

(Of course, by that line of thinking, its possible Tim was never fired as Robin and Jack Drake was never murdered and we’re just gonna gloss right over this here, see, because despite my frequent Tim Ire, he IS a part of this family, dammit, and no second rate sperm donor is gonna stand in the way of that, so whoops, in this AU Jack Drake tripped and fell down the stairs and like. He still died. Oh no, very sad, much regrets, Siri plz send flowers, end tweet.)

And then of course, eventually you get the next generation old enough that Ma’ri, Jake, Cerdian, Lian, the twins and a Robert Long from a parallel Earth who just dropped out of the sky one day because Who Cares and never left, like....are all bursting at the seams to start their own team and go out and have their own adventures, and Ma’ri turns on the Grayson charm to be like “Pleeeeease, Uncle Dami, enable us, please, it’ll piss off Grandpa Batty, and you know you love making him do the scrunchy face of doom, c’mooooooon, we just wanna borrow the Batplane for a little trip and we’ll bring it right back and wash it and everything, NOBODY HAS TO KNOW.” 

Kory, from the other room: I already know.

Ma’ri: Curses! Foiled by my lack of an indoor voice yet again.

Uncle Dami just winks at his niece though, in that way of his that isn’t actually a wink cuz he’s still Damian, and he doesn’t Do That, but he does twitch his eyebrow in a downward direction at least, and that’s basically the same thing, it totally counts: Don’t worry, Little Star. You had me at enable.

And just. Yeah. More of that. All of that. Selina and Bruce probably actually walk down the aisle at some point too, by the power invested in me Cuz I Said So.

In conclusion:

This would be amazing and excellent and DC sucketh for denying us it, The End, roll credits, and SCENE.

[breaniebree]

Hey bree!! So I have a really silly request. I have seen many posts where tonks morphs into dumbledore and scares the shit out of other students. Also sometines dumbledore himself joins in and there are 2 dumbledores talking to a student. So could you maybe write a oneshot or something. ( Pleeeeease × infinity) The point is that whatever you write it always turns out amazing. You just write so well. So could you try please when you have time??

Hi, siriusblack15!  Thank you for ask, but I’m not one to take prompts because a) it takes away from what I’m writing and b) it sets me way off track from what I’m writing.

I’m that honoured you’d make a request though and I promise to think about it.  I did already write her turning her into Snape and she’s told stories of how she morphed into different professors over the years.  I will never say never, but right now we’ll say not now, does that work?

Flashback Chapter 21

“Mum mentions it whenever she gets a letter from Professor Sprout,” Tonks told him honestly.  “Nymphadora, you better not be following in your cousin’s footsteps — that boy was always in detention!”  she mimicked in a well done impression of Andromeda.

Remus laughed, drying his hair with the towel and wringing out his wet shirt.  “Are you a mischief maker, Nymphadora?”

She smiled mischievously.  “Only if I get caught.”  When Remus laughed she grinned widely.  “At the end of the year, I morphed into Professor Sprout and told our house that even though we had lost the House Cup to Slytherin, we were still having a party to celebrate our accomplishments.  Then I went to the kitchens and got food and drink and we had a grand old time.”

Remus’ eyes widened.  “You morphed into one of your professors?”

Tonks nodded, grinning widely.  “Only once or twice.  Let me tell you, Snape does not find it amusing at all when he catches you.”

“Snape?”  Remus asked in surprise, recognizing the name.

“Yeah, Professor Snape?  Was he not a teacher when you were there?  I guess he is pretty young actually, only finished school a few years back."

He remembered who Snape had once hung around with, and he suddenly had an image of him teaching Defence Against the Dark Arts (and it wasn’t a good one).  What was Dumbledore doing even employing him at Hogwarts?  Remus had suspected him to be a Death Eater before they had even left school; all of his friends had turned out to be.  But he had never heard anything or seen anything on any of his missions with the Order about Snape actually working for Voldemort.

“I do know, Snape.  Sirius and I went to school with him.  He was a greasy-haired git back then too, but we were never very nice to him.  What does he teach?”  Remus asked in interest.

"He teaches Potions and he’s Head of Slytherin House too.”  Tonks said, grabbing the peach juice that Remus had brought out with him earlier and passing two of the bottles to Remus and Harry.

“Hmm, well I find that very interesting,” Remus told her.  

Potions had always been a special subject of Snape’s.  It wasn’t the worst choice, he thought as Slughorn must have retired.

"He's crabby, but maybe that’s only to me because I sent him hair care products anonymously every week for a whole semester until he caught me packing up the basket in the Owlery one day.”

“Oh, that’s priceless!"  Remus busted into laughter.  He could picture Severus Snape opening a package of hair care products, a look of pure disdain upon his face and his greasy hair falling forward.

Tonks grinned widely, moving to help Harry dry his legs better and squeezed out the water from his trouser legs. 

“Definitely the same git.  I tripped over someone’s bag and knocked a textbook off one of the desks and he looked at me and said: ‘Ten points from Hufflepuff since Miss Tonks isn’t capable of walking into a classroom.’  Git.”

Flashback Chapter 57

(jealous Remus)

He offered her a small smile.  “Where’s your boyfriend these days?”

“Jon?  He’s visiting his grandparents in Paris this week.  But next week I’m going to stay with him and his parents for a bit,” she told him with a smile.  “I’ve missed having him around every day.”

Remus nodded; staying with her boyfriend, there was a thought he immensely didn’t like.  When Harry came back downstairs, Tonks spent the next thirty minutes regaling Harry and Remus with some of the pranks she had gotten away with at Hogwarts that year; including transforming into Filch and giving a few of her classmates detentions.  

Flashback Chapter 88

Remus ran his fingers through her hair.  The last thing he wanted to do was touch her that way after a dream like that.  The fear of hurting was still much too close to the surface.  “Tell me about some of the pranks that you got up to at school.”

She smiled against his chest.  “That could take hours.”

“Perfect then,” he said with a smile as he kissed the top of her head.

Tonks stretched her legs out, tossing one over his legs as she moved closer.  “Well, let’s start with I did to Filch.  Did I ever tell you that in my first year I kept changing my appearance to look like McGonagall and lecture Filch on proper respect towards the students?”

Remus chuckled, entwining his leg with hers.  “No, I don’t believe you did.”

Flashback Chapter 122

“Now what is this map you guys have been speaking of?”  Tonks asked, accepting the blank parchment from Harry.

“I’ll explain after, Tonks, try to get it to reveal itself first,” Sirius said with a grin.

Tonks rolled her eyes and tugged her wand out, tapping the parchment.  “Revelio!”

Cursive writing began to fill the parchment.

“Read it aloud,” Remus instructed.

“Mr Moony congratulates you on your attempt, but thinks someone as sexy as you could do better.”  She turned to grin at Remus who blushed.

“Guess it’s still connected to our magic.”

“Keep reading,” Sirius instructed.

“Mr Wormtail wonders why you bother even trying if you’re going to use ‘revelio’ to find your answer.  Mr Padfoot thanks you for your attempt but insists a smart-arse like you should prank better.  Mr Prongs offers you his smile and says: Neener neener neener.”  Tonks smirked at them.  “What is this?”

Remus tapped his wand on the parchment.  “I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”  The maroon coloured lines flowed across the parchment and Tonks’ eyes widened.

“This is Hogwarts!”

Harry grinned at her.  “It’s a map of the entire school and it’s completely brilliant!  They created it when they were at school.”

“See, it says so right here, Messers Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs,” Remus said with a smile.  “Filch confiscated it in our last month of seventh year and Fred and George Weasley stumbled across it.”

Tonks grinned widely at Remus.  “I wish I would have had this at school.  Do you know how much fun I could have had?”

Remus rolled his eyes.  “You had enough fun impersonating Snape and other professors!”

She grinned.  “Did I ever tell you about the time I morphed into Snape and made out with a statue on a dare?”

Sirius busted into laughter.  “No, did anyone see you?”

“Oh, yes, I made sure it was quite public.  There were some interesting rumours after that.”

Harry smirked at her.  “That’s brilliant!”

Remus handed the map back to Harry after closing it again.  “Anyway, Snape does know it was us and he’s well aware that he’s being watched.  Dumbledore and McGonagall have both spoken to him about his behaviour to the students.  I’m glad to see that he’s following through.”

“If he doesn’t, Prongslet, you tell me.  I want to know and I will have words with him.”

Harry nodded at his godfather.  “Okay.”  He smiled at Tonks as he helped himself to some more of the pot roast.  “Did you ever morph into Dumbledore?”

Tonks grinned at him.  “Once.  Dumbledore told me I did a good job, but next time he was going to put me to work.  He was chill about it.”

“Who else?”

Tonks laughed.  “Professor Sprout once and I gave Hufflepuff permission to throw a massive party.”

“Did it work?”

“For a while, until Sprout showed up and shut it down and found out ‘she’ had given permission.  I spent a full month in detention, but it was worth it.”

Remus smirked and squeezed her hand.  “Troublemaker.”

Tonks merely looked at him.  “Me?  Mr I Made My Own Map of Hogwarts to Prank and Cause Mischief?”

He blushed and kissed her cheek.  “I have no idea what you’re implying.  So, Harry, what are having for dessert?”  he asked, grinning from ear to ear.  

Tonks only smirked at him.

Flashback Chapter 186

Remus woke up the next morning to the soft graze of his wife’s fingertips dancing along his spine.  He sighed in contentment, a big smile on his face as he rolled over to look at her and jolted in alarm, rolling off the bed and onto the floor as Tonks busted into hysterical laughter.

“Uncalled for!”  he declared, glowering at her.Tonks, who had decided to alter her face and hair to resemble a certain hook-nosed, greasy-haired git, slowly changed herself back as she roared in laughter.  

“Get back up here.”

Remus knelt on the floor by their bed.  “Promise me that you will never do that again.”

She grinned and leaned across the bed, kissing his lips.  “Admit it, you thought it was hilarious.”

Remus fisted his hand in her curls and kissed her deeply.  “No,” he growled.  “It sure as hell killed my morning erection.”

Tonks giggled.  “But your face, Rem!  Oh Merlin, it was priceless!”

“How long have you been plotting this, Dora?”

“Months… eons…” she said, still giggling.  “But you always wake up first and distract me.”

Remus stood up.  “First day of our marriage and you’re already giving me trust issues.”

Tonks grinned and leaned forward to kiss his limp cock, licking it softly as it trembled under her tongue.  “Let me make it up to you,” she murmured as he began to harden under her ministrations.

Remus held her in place for a moment, letting her work him over and then he tugged her away and to her feet on the bed.  He wrapped his arms around her, tugging her forward into his arms and wrapping her legs around his waist.  He kissed her deeply before he headed into the kitchen, holding her in his arms and then he sat her on the barstool by the island.

“First we need sustenance.  What do you want for breakfast, Mrs Lupin?”

Tonks grinned, stretching her arms up over her head.  “Pancakes.”

Remus nipped at her bottom lip and grinned.  “I love you, Nymphadora.”

Tonks tugged him close for a long kiss.  “You’re not really mad at me, are you?”

His hand moved to cup a naked breast and he grinned.  “You are a mischief maker and I love you, but please, for the love of Zeus never make yourself look like Snape again, especially in our bed!”

She grinned.  “I promise, my husband.”

He grinned widely at her words.  “I’m going to make my sexy wife chocolate pancakes with fresh strawberries and powdered sugar for breakfast.”

“That sounds brilliant,” she told him.  “I’m going to sit right here at the counter and watch you make me breakfast.”

Remus bent his head to lick her breast.  “As long as you stay naked.”

Tonks grinned as she checked out his own naked bum as he headed to the cupboard.  “I just have a few last minute things to pack, but then I’m ready to go.  Will you tell me where we’re going yet?”

He grinned at her from over his shoulder.  “No.  It’s a surprise.  Our portkey leaves at one.”

Tonks brought her legs up and sat cross-legged on the counter.  “But it’s our honeymoon, I want to know.”

Remus only shrugged, a soft smile on his face.  “You will, at one-oh-one.”

She sighed as she watched him putter around their kitchen naked.  As far as she was concerned, they could spend the next seven days right here.  She didn’t care.  She just wanted to spend the whole time making love with her husband in every way imaginable.  Her eyes stayed on his bum, watching the sway of it, the way it clenched and moved as he bent and stretched and she licked her lips, her eyes falling to the long swaying cock between his legs.  And she definitely wanted him to stay naked, she thought.

So far this being married thing definitely had its perks.

Flashback Chapter 187

The moment that he was out of earshot, Tonks grabbed Harry’s hand in hers.  “I finally did the prank on him!”

“The one where you make yourself look like Snape?”

She nodded, snorting in laughter.  “He jumped out of the bed so fast, it was hilarious!  I’m still laughing about it and it’s been over a week.”

Harry grinned widely.  “I wish I could’ve seen it!”

“Oh, Harry, he was so traumatized!  It was brilliant!  Worth every second!”

Harry grinned and couldn’t help but laugh as Tonks doubled over in laughter herself.  The two of them were still laughing when Sirius and Remus came in almost five minutes later.

“What did we miss?”  Sirius asked, wiping his greasy hands on the grease rag he had hanging from his back jean pocket.  He was shirtless and glistening from the heat outside, his hair pulled back in a short stubby tail at his neck, the front pieces still dangling in his face.  He drank cold water from a tall glass before looking at Harry and Tonks again.

Harry grinned.  “Tonks was just telling me how she woke Uncle Moony up one morning looking like Snape and how he fell right out of bed!”

Sirius busted into laughter.  “Like how much like Snape?”

“Just her face,” Remus said in annoyance.  “But it sure as hell wasn’t the wakeup call I wanted from my new wife.”

Harry busted into laughter again as Tonks and Sirius joined in and Remus glared at them.

“It wasn’t funny!”

Tonks stood up, clutching her side as she moved to kiss her husband.  “It was hysterical, but I love you.”

Remus flicked her in the forehead.  “Minx.”

[pastpatientlywaitingforimagines]

Dragonology | Charlie Weasley x femHufflepuff!Reader Part 1.

A/N: In completion, this fic has 16k words. I’m splitting it into parts because technology is hard, but they’ll all get posted at the same time. I think it’s the longest thing I’ve ever written and I’m pretty proud of it. I know it strays from the musical-themed fics I’ve written in the past, but HP was the first fandom I ever wrote fanfic for. I did this to enjoy writing again and it worked, so I hope you enjoy it too!

DRAGONOLOGY FAQ

Warnings: Romance, kissing, alcohol, dragons

“Did I tell you Ron has some friends over?” Charlie mentioned as you were about to step into the fireplace. You shook your head.

“Harry Potter and a girl that they’re friends with. Just be cool, ok?” You chuckled at your boyfriend’s request.

“I always play it cool.” This time it was Charlie’s turn to laugh.

“Have you forgotten that time we met the beater from Puddlemere United? You were definitely not cool then.”

“That was different,” you defended yourself, handing Charlie his bag before grabbing a handful of Floo Powder. You gave him a quick kiss before throwing the powder and clearly stating “The Burrow”.

As soon as the flames subsided you were hit full force with a hug from a whirl of long red hair. Ginny started talking your ear off, telling you all about her most recent term at Hogwarts. You moved away from the fireplace, listening intently to the thirteen year old’s stories as you put your bag down. Charlie placed a hand on the small of your back when he arrived shortly after.

“Do you know where Mum is?” Charlie snuck his question in while his younger sister took a breath. She shrugged, gesturing in the general direction of the kitchen before continuing, “Me and the twins were just going to play quidditch in the garden, will you be on my team pleeeeease?�� As soon as the words left her mouth the twins started yelling from the top of the stairs about how they both wanted to be teammates with you instead of each other. Ginny grabbed your hand and started tugging you in the direction of the door, but Charlie stood in her way.

“We’re going to see Mum first. You lot can go practice in the garden, because (y/n) and I are going to crush you tomorrow,” Charlie raised his eyebrows, sending his younger siblings scurrying outside. With a smirk, Charlie took your hand in his own and pulled you into the kitchen where his mother was busy enchanting a tea kettle.

When she saw the pair of you enter the space she rushed over immediately, wrapping you both in a warm hug.

“I’m so glad you’re here! (y/n), dear, you look amazing as always. Charlie, your hair is much too long. I’m making some tea, have you met Harry and Hermione yet?” You noticed Charlie’s youngest brother, a black haired boy, and a curly haired girl standing on the other side of the kitchen.

“I’m Charlie and this is (y/n),” he introduced you. Harry Potter was exactly what you thought he’d be, a scrawny fourteen year old. You felt bad for the poor boy as you sipped your tea and chatted with Ron and his friends while Charlie rubbed calming circles on your shoulder with his thumb.

At the end of the evening, after a lovely dinner made by Mrs. Weasley, you and Charlie climbed the stairs up to his room. Just outside of Ron’s room, Charlie turned to you and put a finger to his lips.

“Charlie seems really cool,” you heard Hermione on the other side of the door.

“(y/n) was cool too, who exactly is she?” Harry asked quietly.

“She and Charlie started dating while they were at Hogwarts. She was the beater for Hufflepuff, probably the best player they’ve ever had I reckon. After they finished school they moved out to Romania together to work with dragons,” Ron supplied answers for his friends, “We all love (y/n), Ginny especially. Mum keeps telling Charlie he should propose soon, not sure why he hasn’t yet honestly.”

Charlie’s eyes widened and you could see a pink hue flush his cheeks in the dim light. He glanced upstairs and finished going up the next two flights of stairs to his room. You followed,  perching on his bed as Charlie dug around in his bag, avoiding eye contact with you and letting an uncomfortable silence fall in the empty space. He finally found what he was looking for, a full bottle of firewhisky, which he opened and took a long swig from before finally meeting your eyes with his own. You gave him a small grin before taking the bottle from him and taking a swig yourself, feeling the warmth hit your stomach.

“Sorry about that,” Charlie finally broke the silence, settling next to you on his bed. You handed him the bottle and leaned into his shoulder, feeling his body move as he took another drink.

“You know my friends think we’re secretly engaged?” you giggled, taking the bottle back and putting the glass to your lips.

“Really?” Charlie seemed surprised.

“Yeah, they ask about it almost every letter they send me.” You passed the bottle back to Charlie, who took a sip before speaking.

“It has to be perfect.” You glanced up at him in confusion.

“When I propose to you. It has to be perfect. That’s why I haven’t yet.”

You readjusted your position so that you were facing your boyfriend.

“You could ask me to marry you right now and it would be perfect.” It was Charlie’s turn to be confused.

“Wait really?”

“All that I care about is that you want to spend the rest of your life with me, doesn’t have to be fancy or anything,” you shrugged. Charlie set down the bottle and picked up his wand. He flicked his wrist before setting his wand down again and taking your hands in his own.

“I’ve had this since before we moved to Romania,” he let go of your hand to catch the small box he had summoned from his bag. He opened it up, revealing a simple but beautiful ring.

“(y/n), I’ve known for a long time that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?”

“You’re not just saying that because of the whisky?” you jested. Charlie shook his head ferociously.

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you too. Yes I’ll marry you,”  Charlie leaned in and kissed you deeply. You could still taste the firewhisky, though you weren’t sure if it was from his tongue or your own.

You ended up curled up comfortably in his arms, still passing the bottle of firewhisky between you and admiring the ring that now adorned your left hand.

“I think it’s hilarious that Ron and his friends think you’re cool,” you said quietly. Charlie pressed a kiss to your forehead before taking the bottle again.

“Why’s that, love?”

“Because you’re the biggest dork I’ve ever met,” you mused.

“I don’t know, I think you’re a bigger dork than I am. Have you heard yourself talk about Swedish Short-snouts?”

“I have never met a more precious dragon than the one I’ve been working with. She’s a creampuff and deserves every word I say about her.”

“My point exactly,” Charlie pressed another kiss onto the top of your head.

“We should probably stop drinking if we want to have any chance of beating the kids tomorrow,” you mumbled, turning the bottle around in your hands.

“I don’t know, it might put us on a more even playing field. We were the best two players in our year,” Charlie took the bottle and took another swig.

“Are Ron and his friends playing too though? From what I’ve heard Harry Potter is the best seeker Gryffindor’s ever had,” you jabbed your elbow into Charlie’s side jokingly.

“I assume they will be, maybe you’re right.. we should stop drinking,” Charlie gently helped you sit up before standing and putting the now mostly empty bottle on his dresser. He pulled his hair tie out of his hair, letting his red locks fall around his shoulders. The two of you made yourself comfortable under the blankets, tangled in each other’s arms, and with another flick of Charlie’s wrist the light was put out.

When you went downstairs in the morning, you were greeted by Ginny shoveling food into her mouth as quickly as she possibly could.

“Slow down there, girlfriend,” you teased, making plates of warm food for yourself and Charlie.

Between bites, the littlest redhead explained herself, “The twins are already outside practicing and didn’t bother to wake me up. I have to get out there too.”

“They didn’t wake you up because they know you’re already better than them. They need the extra practice, you don’t. If anyone in the Weasley family is going to be a professional quidditch player it’s going to be you,” you shrugged. Ginny’s eyes grew wide, and her fork slowed down.

“Maybe you’re right,” she mused, looking a lot less stressed than she had before.

“Of course she’s right,” Charlie came into the kitchen, pressing a kiss on your cheek before accepting the plate of food you were offering him.

“Are the others up yet? Harry and them?” At the mention of Harry’s name, Ginny started coughing, as if she was choking on the piece of sausage she had just put into her mouth.

“Erm, I don’t know,” she said quietly when she regained her composure. Charlie chuckled, “looks like someone has a crush,” he said teasingly to you.

“I do not!” Ginny stood up from the table, the tips of her ears almost the same shade of red as her hair. She practically tossed her dishes in the sink and then disappeared outside.

“She definitely does,” you and Charlie laughed.

When the time came for the backyard match you had eight total players, as Hermione had been guilted into participation “for the sake of evenness, ‘mione,” as Fred had put it. It was determined that you and Charlie would be ‘captains’ of one team, with the twins as ‘captains’ of the other, since the four of you came as your own separate package deals.

You and Charlie won the first pick, and with little deliberation chose Ginny.

“As (y/n) put it this morning, she’s the Weasley who has the best chance of going pro.”

Ginny practically bounced over to your side, grinning widely.

The twins picked next, immediately choosing Harry.

“Best seeker Gryffindor’s ever had,” they said smugly.

“Watch it,” Charlie warned, “we want Hermione,” he said much to the surprise of everyone involved, including Hermione herself. Ron joined the twins, and the teams went to opposite ends of the garden to strategize.

You knew the game would be over when Molly announced lunch, but your team was down by one goal and you could smell something delicious in the kitchen. Charlie glanced over at you from where he was hovering by your team’s goalposts and gave you a curt nod, showing that he was on board with what you were about to do. You gripped the quaffle tightly and pulled up right next to Ginny.

“Don’t focus on anything but getting this ball in the hoop ok?” You passed her the ball. She set her face in determination and you pealed away. You positioned yourself between the twins and Ron, who were closest to the hoop on their side.

“Wow, being a chaser is pretty hard, my left hand is kind of sore. I think it might be bruised, can you guys tell?” you held your hand up towards the twins, turning your hand slightly so your ring glinted in the sunlight. You watched smugly as both of the twins’ jaws dropped.

“(y/n), is that a ring?”

“Our Charlie proposed?”

“Was that there yesterday?”

“Took him long enough!” You laughed at their comments as they zoomed closer with Ron and Harry in tow to get a better look. You lowered your altitude, bringing the boys with you. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Charlie nudge Ginny ever so slightly before coming over to join the group that was forming.

“Happened last night, boys,” he said with a grin.

“Does Mum know?” Ron asked.

“You lot are the first to know, though I’m surprised Ginny didn’t notice at breakfast this morning.”

“Speaking of, where is Ginny? She should be freaking out right now,” George was the first to notice his sister’s absence. You nodded your head towards the makeshift goalpost, where Ginny was waiting. With a bright smile she tossed the ball through the hoop just as Molly called out into the garden.

“Time for lunch dears!” The boys all groaned, knowing that the game was ending in a tie.

“I’m going to have a sister!” Ginny hit the ground and quickly threw herself into your arms. A look of confusion crossed Molly’s face, glancing over at you and Charlie for clarification. You held up your left hand with a smile, and Ginny was almost immediately replaced with Molly wrapping you in her arms.

“I knew this would happen, wait until Arthur hears! Now you’ll officially be part of the family! Oh and we’ll need to start planning the wedding, we could have it here!”

“Easy Mum, we only got engaged last night. We’ll have plenty of time to plan but right now I just want to have some lunch with my beautiful fiancée,” Charlie reminded his mother.

While you agreed with Charlie and were not ready to start making wedding plans, the rest of your soon to be siblings-in law were making plans of their own while you ate lunch. Fred and George were teasing Charlie about the number of dragons that were going to be invited, while Ginny was telling you about the extended Weasley family members that would be invited. Ron talked mostly with his two friends, but he grinned ear to ear whenever you made eye contact.

You and Charlie had been dating for so long that you had strong relationships with all of his siblings as well. Bill was at Hogwarts the same time you and Charlie were, so he was the first of the Weasley clan besides your handsome dragonologist that you met. In fact, he was the one who had encouraged Charlie to ask you out in the first place.

You also met Percy while at Hogwarts, and though the younger boy didn’t always approve of the shenanigans that you and Charlie had gotten up to in your later years at the school he did admire your dedication to studying magical creatures and putting in the time it took to get it right and be your absolute best. Even if he wouldn’t admit it, Percy looked up to you and arguably sent more letters to you than he did Charlie.

Fred and George had each other, so your relationship with them was more a rivalry of who was the better pair. The only trick they could pull that you and Charlie couldn’t was switching places unnoticed so you learned to tell them apart very early on, though it took them until your last year at Hogwarts to realize you had just been humoring them the entire time.

Ron and Ginny were very young the first time you met them, and both were equally enamored with your strong will and quick wit. You were Ginny’s first strong female role model besides her mother, and Ron considered you his sister after you played chess with him for a whole afternoon.

The reason you and Charlie had come home to the Burrow from Romania was to attend the Quidditch World Cup. Arthur had gotten tickets from work and had invited the whole Weasley clan to attend. You were taking Bill’s ticket, after he had sent you a letter telling you that he wouldn’t be able to leave Egypt and that Molly had recently been worrying more about you and Charlie so going home would be good for everyone.

The morning of the match, everyone had to be awake very early to make it to the Portkey on time. For you and Charlie, the 4am alarm was a normal time for the two of you to be getting ready to tend to the dragons in your care.

“Morning, love,” Charlie kissed you, eyes still closed and arm draped across your waist effectively trapping you in his embrace as you moved to get out of bed.

“Good morning, it’s time to get up,” you reminded him, poking at his cheeks with your fingers.

“But we’re on vacation,” his eyes stayed closed.

“You promised to go to this match with me before we were even done school. You can sleep in later.” Charlie’s eyes opened, crinkling at the edges as he smiled.

“Are you excited?” He asked as you pulled the sweater Molly had sent you last Christmas over your head. Your eyes locked on his.

“More than you can imagine.”

The rest of the Weasley Clan was not as chipper as you were that morning, but the brisk walk to the Portkey helped wake everyone up. You met up with the Diggory’s, and you couldn’t help but notice that Cedric was as wide eyed meeting you as his father was meeting Harry.

“You’re a Hufflepuff legend. I’ve heard stories about your final match, I can’t believe you lost. The team hasn’t been that good since you left,” the younger boy gushed. You nudged Charlie’s side.

“Honestly I can’t believe we lost either. The Gryffindor seeker wasn’t even that good, Maeve should have gotten the snitch,” you teased.

After the exhilarating Portkey ride (“I’ll never get used to that,” Charlie whispered in your ear and pulled you closer to him after arriving), you made yourselves at home in the tent Arthur had charmed for the event.

“What was Cedric saying about your last Quidditch match?” Ginny said, sliding closer to you at the table as you made your next move in your chess game with Ron. Charlie was on your other side and let out a chuckle when she asked.

“Check mate. It was the best match I’ve ever played in. You haven’t heard about it?” Ginny shook her head. You looked at Ron and raised your eyebrows.

“I’ve heard stories from the Gryffindor side, mostly about how it ended,” he started cleaning up the board.

“That’s the best part,” Charlie affirmed. You stuck your tongue out at him, rolling your eyes and turning back to his little sister.

“I’m only telling you this story because it’s part of the reason I’m here,” you told her. Confusion washed over Ginny’s face.

“Charlie asked you out during Care of Magical Creatures class, we all know that.”

“Not why I’m here with Charlie, but why I’m here at the World Cup.”

Next Part

[leah-halliwell92]

Here Come’s The Sun

Summary: May has had it with Jack’s passive aggressive attitude, his pining after Lucy and most especially her own pining for him. So she takes one out of her sister’s book and decides to stay in on the day of love itself. There’s nothing better than work to give one some time alone with their thoughts...and away from the borderline disgusting lovers on the outside world.

(For those who know...This will be in the same universe as an in progress work for this same fandom. And if anyone else has questions drop em in my box!)

May adjusted her glasses as she stopped in front of the table that is a little ways away from Dracula’s cage. She resisted the urge to scoff and roll her eyes at the files that cluttered up its surface. 

“Can’t even be bothered to put the papers in their respective files,” she said to herself as she separated the papers into their correct file folder and putting the files into a neat pile on a corner of the table before setting her own folders on the table.

“Thought you’d be out like the rest of your colleagues,” the man in the cage said nonchalantly.

May rolled her eyes at that but said nothing and went about finishing her file on Castle Dracula. 

“Isn’t that what today is all about? Pairing up with your other and giving each other tokens of affection and what not?” He continued on unbothered.

May rolled her eyes and looked up to find the man in question staring at her through the glass of his cage. 

Dracula to his credit, looked as curious as he sounded.

May gave herself a mental shake and went back to her writing.

“What on earth could be so interesting in that file that is keeping you practically mute?” He asked now annoyed at being so blatantly ignored.

May sighed and looked up before saying, “I’m writing about my latest expedition. If you must know I’m writing about the ruins of a castle I was studying.”

“Were?” He asked his brows furrowing in curiosity.

“Yes,” she said with a sigh, “I was about to uncover something important when my dear sister gave me a call to come home.”

“Ah so it is my home you were digging through,” he said with a cocky smirk, “So I do interest you then?”

May scoffed, “Don’t push your luck, I’m not my sister.”

“No?” He said in disbelief, “So you don’t want to study me? And have been wanting to crack me open like an egg and poke and prod at what’s inside for the last two weeks?”

May laughed out right at that.

“I don’t see where that could ever be funny,” Dracula said a growl coming from his chest.

May’s body still shook from laughing but she had to admit, he is rather handsome and the way he seemed to ooze raw power impressed her...slightly.

“It is when you say such a thing to a woman with a doctorate in European history,” she said with a small grin.

“Oh,” he said now looking, slightly, abashed.

She shook her head at him and finished the paragraph she was working on so she could give him her undivided attention.

She gave him a look over comparing what he looks like to the portrait she’d seen in one of the rooms. 

“What,” he said smirking again, “Like what you see?”

“That is irrelevant,” she said voice even as she continued studying him from her seat.

“Well aren’t you ever filled with surprises,” he said cockily.

She smirked and was about to say something else when...

“Don’t entertain him...it won’t do you any good,” her sister, Zoe, said as she walked in lab coat billowing with every step she took. 

May rolled her eyes in the dark making the vampire in his cage smirk. 

“Goodbye Zoe,” she said loudly.

“You shouldn’t even be here,” she said clearly not liking the clear dismissal.

“And where should I be Zoe?” May asked angrily, “In the bowels of the foundation locked away with my files and archives? If the point was to keep me buried I’d have stayed in Transylvania.”

Zoe couldn’t say anything to that, not because she didn’t have anything to say but because her younger sister had a point. She knew of the expedition and knew where. May would have been safe no matter what...

“Take Jack with you by the way,” May said not looking at her sister finally turning to look at her sister.

Zoe for her part was confused as to why, after all May had a bit of a crush and thought her sister and colleague were going to give a relationship a try. 

May gave Zoe a heated glare. 

The sisters shared a silent conversation before Zoe nodded sadly and left the room.

May cleared her throat and stood.

“Will you ever tell me why you were so studiously examining my person?” Dracula asked curiously.

May gave him a weak grin but excused herself to put away Jack and her sister’s mess of files leaving her behind.

She kept her steps light not wanting to draw attention to herself as she made her way down to the records’ hall.

‘I really need to find a second office,’ she thought as she put the files back in their respective spots.

Everything was going better than she expected time wise, she even had time to change into her leggings and a cozy top, when she heard two distinct voices walking through her sanctum. 

“Of course she’s here,” Jack said as he walked in turning on all the lights as he walked through the room like he owned the place, “She never leaves this place.”

May covered her mouth to keep her breathing in check. She knew Jack wasn’t too keen on her, she also knew what he thought about her. He made it no secret and told anyone who’d listen all about her hermit-like ways. She never thought that he’d completely disregard the fact that she has an education and a title in her own right. 

“She’s qualified historian Jack,” she heard one of her colleagues say in defense of her.

May took off her shoes and worked her way around the large archive’s room. Knowing the room like the back of your hand helps when one wants to make a swift escape.

“She’s a qualified secretary,” he said derogatorily. 

May paused a tear escaping her. She knew that that is what he and her sister saw her as. 

She made a quick exit narrowly escaping the pair and making her way back to where the cage is.

May ignored Dracula’s questioning gaze and dismissed the guards swiftly reminding them that she is as much in charge of the place as Saint Zoe. The guards left at her order but felt no comfort in leaving her there with a clearly dangerous...beast. She proceeded to put her files in her bag and pull out her laptop.

“Are you alright?” Dracula asked after having had enough of seeing the woman command the attention of all in the room.

‘She really is something,’ he thought holding back a smirk remembering how Agatha had done the same on the Demeter when his true nature was revealed.

May gave Dracula a guarded look before pulling out her sketch pad and a pencil before clicking the space bar on her computer allowing music to play from it softly. All the while not answering his question.

Dracula was about to inquire again when a Doctor Jack Seward walked into the room.

“There you are May, I need you to pull a file out for me,” he said flashing her a flirtatious grin.

She looked at him then at Dracula before looking back at Jack.

“Sorry we’re closed,” she said and went back to her drawing.

Jack looked dumfounded at the response. May had always done something for him when he asked without question.

“Its very important May please?” He said laying the good puppy look on thick.

“Oh pleeeeease do you really think that act will work?” Dracula taunted, “Do you really think she’ll fall for it? 

Jack bristled at that but spared Dracula no response to that.

“When the dead guy is right,” May said never straying from what she was doing.

Jack’s temper was showing, the morning’s CCTV was going to be more than amusing to see for all involved.

“Go find Lucy Jack, I’m sure she’s dying to see you,” May said glaring at him, “After all I’m just a lowly secretary.”

Dracula gapped at the girl...no. Woman.

Jack’s eyes widened at her words, “May–”

“It’s Doctor Helsing,” she said voice hard, “And I will become your worst nightmare if you don’t get your ass out of here.”

Dracula openly stared at May then mouth wide open as her words mirrored those of a similarly strong willed woman.

Jack swallowed thickly at this, “How can you–”

“I am an educated woman with fighting experience,” May said, “You may be taller than me but you know what they say...they higher they are the harder the fall.”

Jack swallowed at that having seen you training one day and took your threat to  heart. He wouldn’t show this to her though, he needed that file and he’d do almost anything to get it. Even play your feelings for him to get it.

“May, please,” she said dropping his voice down some.

Dracula rolled his eyes and raised his hand to get May’s attention.

She looked his way fire in her eyes, “What.”

“Just letting you know you might have to do that if what he did is any tell,” he said almost pitiously nodding in Jack’s direction, “Well that and his heart rate’s accelerated meaning what you’ve said has had a rather profound effect on him.”

May looked at Jack in interest.

“Come on May you can’t mean to trust him can you? He’s a monster!” Jack screamed.

“Actually he’s been nothing but courteous to me since I walked through the door. The one whose been an ass is you thinking I’d whore myself to you because I have a school yard crush on you that will pass the longer your higher than thou attitude is ruling what little common sense you have,” May said a dangerous smirk on her face.

“Jack! There you are,” Zoe said as she walked in.

Dracula backed off the window pane and moved to lay down on the chaise of the cage.

“Did I miss something?” She asked seeing Jack’s pale face before yelling, “What did you do Dracula!?”

“He didn’t do anything Zoe, believe it or not,” May said evenly standing from her seat.

Zoe wasn’t in the mood to argue and was sure she’d see the feed in the morning, the pair looked unharmed and Dracula looked to be more than used to being in his cage.

“I know you don’t believe me Zoe,” May said softly, “Just leave.”

Zoe went to her sister but was more than hurt when May took a step a way from her.

“Leave,” May repeated defeatedly, “Take your...man with you.”

Zoe wanted to say more but decided to wait till later and did as May said. 

“Let’s go Jack,” Zoe said firmly.

“But...the file,” she said in protest.

“Can wait till tomorrow,” she said firmly.

Zoe didn’t wait for Jack to respond or do anything, she dragged him from the room promising to call May later so they could talk.

May sighed and slumped back into her chair.

“Are you alright?�� Dracula asked.

May sighed and looked to the man who stood back at the window.

She shook her head and went back to her drawing. 

A couple of songs later a soft guitar was heard coming from her laptop.

“Can you raise the...um...what is it...” he started asking a little lost for words still unfamiliar with the technology still. 

“You mean make it louder?” May asked lightly. 

He nodded.

Here comes the sun, doo-dun doo-doo Here comes the sun, and I say It's all right

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here

”Dr. Helsing,” Dracula asked staring at her in what looked like wonder but May couldn’t be sure.  Here comes the sun, doo-dun doo-doo Here comes the sun, and I say It's all right

May looked at Dracula questioningly an inquisitive brow in the air. Little darling, the smile's returning to their faces Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here Here comes the sun Here comes the sun, and I say It's all right

“Would you honor me with a dance?” He said with a shrug.

Sun, sun, sun, here it comes Sun, sun, sun, here it comes Sun, sun, sun, here it comes Sun, sun, sun, here it comes Sun, sun, sun, here it comes

“Oh what the hell,” she said and stood, “If I’m going to die might as well die dancing.”

Dracula looked surprised at her comment but held his tongue. 

May was somewhat careful and put on her grandmother’s cross and under her shirt. Before making her way to the door and using her key to open the door.

“Hold it mister,” she said as Dracula was about to step out of the room, “I go in, you don’t.”

Dracula agreed to this and offered her his hand.

Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting Little darling, it seems like years since it's been clear

May took his hand and together they danced until dawn...and the news that his lawyer had arrived.

Here comes the sun, doo-dun doo-doo Here comes the sun, and I say It's all right Here comes the sun, doo-dun doo-doo Here comes the sun It's all right It's all right

Dracula Tag-List: @kaddis-world, @count-snackula, @your-pixels-are-showing, @peachlogiic, @the-life-and-times-of-a-nerd, @lokiisbrucebanner, @deny-black, @drsherlockmoffat, @festering-queen, @ashashashashashie, @hoefordarkness​,  @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels, @glamrockmonarch

[bandzrus]

The No Fun Tour (Part 2)

The Dirt!Tommy Lee x Reader

Masterlist

SUMMARY // This is Part 2 of this one-shot here.  You’ve been working as a roadie for Motley Crue for a number of years because of your interest in the music business and family connections with Doc.  The boys are touring with Ozzy and things are looking promising for them, but they’re under strict orders to keep the shenanigans down or else their deal with Elektra Records is in jeopardy.  After Doc assigned you to watch Tommy for a night and you woke up wrapped in his arms, you’re starting to realize you have more feelings for the drummer than you thought.  Ozzy’s wife Sharon has also been cracking down the on the boys, leading them to nickname the tour the “No Fun Tour”.  You’re still on babysitting duty for the band, but you’ve decided they can have a little fun just for one night.

NOTE // oml I can’t believe you guys liked this one-shot so much!  It’s the first one I’ve ever written, I was lowkey only expecting a couple of likes, not a whole bunch of comments saying to write a part 2! My requests are still open if you guys want me to write other stuff btw.

WORDS // 4006

TAG LIST // @brooklyn-antiques @queens-rose-garden

***

You were surprised Tommy kept his mouth shut after what happened.  None of the guys could be described as humble, so you were surprised he hadn’t bragged to Vince and Nikki about you sleeping in his bed.  You were thankful though.  If Doc ever found out, you’d probably be fired because your position as roadie would be compromised.  You were content to act as if nothing ever happened, and it seemed like Tommy was at least on board with the idea.  The week continued as usual, moving from hotel to show, you carrying instruments back and forth and doing booze runs for the band.  Things were still rocky with Elektra Records; the one smooth night at the hotel hadn’t solved that just yet.  Doc was hoping to finish the tour with minimal damages, and Ozzy’s wife Sharon seemed to share his passion for keeping the band from having any fun.  She’d police Motley Crue around like she was their mother, and while you were glad there was less work for you to do, it was obviously taking a toll on the band.

              Nikki was even grouchier and angry than usual, Vince kept claiming he had blue balls, Mick was sulking, and Tommy wouldn’t stop whining to you.

              “We’re out of booze again,” the drummer grumbled, letting the last couple drops of the gin bottle fall onto the table of the bus.

              “That’s your second bottle, Tommy.”

              “So?”

              “Maybe try being sober for once?”

              Tommy crinkled up his nose.

              “This really is the No fucking Fun Tour.  Can we pleeeeease go out and get something?  At least a pack of cigarettes?  Vince stole mine,” he said.  You rolled your eyes and put a hand on your hip before turning to the driver.

              “How much longer until we get to the hotel?” you asked.  Doc looked up from his newspaper and raised an eyebrow.

              “Mmm maybe ten minutes?”

              “Thanks,” you said, turning back to Tommy who was giving you his signature pout. “Can you wait ten minutes?”

              “No.”

              “Too bad.”

              The drummer let out a huge sigh and chucked the bottle across the bus where it thankfully landed in a pile of dirty clothes and didn’t smash.  You really didn’t want to be cleaning glass off the floor right now.

              “Would it make you feel better if I agreed to go out and get cigarettes with you once we get there?” you asked, sliding into the booth opposite Tommy.  

              “Only a little.”

              “I’ll take that,” you said, leaning back against the window and propping your feet up on the table.  Tommy gave you a funny look.

              “What?”

              “Shouldn’t you be like… I don’t know, doing something around here?” he gestured around the bus vaguely.  

              “Like cleaning up after you guys?”

              “Yeah.”

              “I already picked up all your guys’ shit from last night this morning and I can’t do laundry until we get to the hotel, so no.  Now that Sharon’s around you guys are so much easier to manage,” you smirked, knowing that mentioning Sharon’s name would piss Tommy off.

              “I can’t believe Ozzy puts up with that bitch,” the drummer muttered darkly under his breath.

              “It would be like if one of us married Y/N,” Nikki agreed, sliding into the booth next to Tommy.  You tried not to flinch at his comment.  Had Tommy said something to Nikki after all?  Or were you just being paranoid?  Whatever the case, Nikki didn’t seem to notice your movement.  The dark circles under his eyes were evidence that he hadn’t been sleeping much at all since the start of the tour.  Despite how whiny Tommy was, he didn’t look nearly as worse for wear as the rest of the band.  The fact that he was shoveling less coke up his nose than usual was probably part of it.

              “God, I can’t believe I’m saying this but I can’t wait until we’re off this dumb tour,” said Nikki.  “I haven’t screwed any chics in over a week and we’re out of blow.”

              “And booze,” Tommy added.

              “Fuck, are you serious?”

              “Yeah dude, and Vince has my last pack of cigs.”

              “This is the worst fucking tour ever.”

              “Well we can at least get off this bus in about five minutes,” you put in.

              “Thank god.”

                Thank god was right.  Even you were starting to get sick and tired of being on the bus.  It had been a long haul between stops, and with the boys less wasted and high as usual, there wasn’t much to keep you busy.  When the bus pulled up outside the hotel, it took all your skills to stay out of the way as the band pushed and shoved each other out the door and out into the parking lot.  Following after Doc, you sidled up next to Tommy and waited for Doc to give his speech.

              “Alright, you’re rooms 508, 509, 510, and 511.  I’ll be down the hall in 504 if you need me.  I don’t think I have to tell you boys that if anyone so much as lights a match or thinks about throwing anything out the window, we’re back on the bus. Elektra is on my ass about our budget, and you’ll be back on the street if you screw this up.”

              “Finally no fucking babysitters,” growled Nikki.

              “We’re still going into town, right Y/N?” Tommy leaned in to you.  

              “Yes,” you promised, patting his shoulder like a cliché parent.

              “What’s this about going into town?”

              Vince’s blond head popped up from over the drummer’s shoulder.

              “Town, what?”

              All four boys were around you in a second looking like a bunch of starving puppies.  You couldn’t say no to them if you tried.

              “I’ll call a cab,” you said.  You left Doc and the boys out in the parking lot as you asked the receptionist to call a cab for five.  You glad when it showed up in less than five minutes.

                Squeezing in like a pack of sardines, you were wedged between Tommy and Nikki because Vince had snagged the front seat and Mick was giving death glares to anyone who threatened to go in the back with him.  You were once again very thankful that neither Tommy nor Nikki wreaked of alcohol, cocaine, cigarettes, piss, and hairspray yet today.  They would by the end of the night, but that you were used to.  Letting the driver know to take you to the nearest gas station, you settled into your seat, folding your hands in your lap.  You cast a glance up at Tommy when his hand bumped yours.

              “What?” you asked him.

              “Nothin’, just trying to get comfortable in here because somebody doesn’t want to share,” answered Tommy, looked over his shoulder at Mick.

              “I don’t want your chicken legs back here, drummer,” said the guitarist, flipping Tommy off.  Tommy stuck out his tongue and turned back around, letting his arm fall around your shoulder.  You hated to admit that it felt nice.  Usually it was you making the physical contact with Motley Crue, whether that was helping put on makeup, adjusting outfits, patting them on the back, or holding their hair.  It felt good to have the gesture returned in some way.  Nobody else could tell since you, Nikki, and Tommy were so squished together, but you leaned into the drummer.

              It was only a seven minute drive to the gas station, and it was just as much of a hassle to get the boys back out of the cab as it was to get them in. Jostling to be the first in the door, the little bell on the gas station door signaled your entrance.

              “Tommy, pick me up some cigs,” Nikki said, following Mick towards the alcohol at the back of the store.  Vince was about to follow them when he spotted a leggy brunette in the chip aisle. You knew you’d be waiting an extra few minutes for the singer to rejoin them in the cab.  Letting out a breath, you and Tommy made for the counter to inquire about smokes.

              “Uh, how many of the Marlboros do you have?” the drummer asked, pointing for the cashier.

              “Two up here, but I think I’ve got more in the back.  Give me a minute?”

              The two of you nodded.

              “Want anything, Y/N?”

              “Come on Tommy, you know I don’t smoke,” you said.  “I’ll drink whatever you guys pick out, but I draw the line at lung cancer.”

              “You’re a better man than I,” teased Tommy.  “But smokes aside, do you want to talk about the other night?”

              “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you lied, running a hand through your hair.  

              “The other night at the hotel, and just now in the cab.”

              “We’ve been to lots of hotels, drummer,” you diverted.  This was going to be the start of a very awkward conversation and an even more awkward relationship that you didn’t want to happen.

              “For the record I wasn’t trying to get in your pants, I just didn’t think you’d want to sleep on the floor in those pants.  You’re the one who destroyed the pillow wall.”

              You let out a huff of breath and faced the drummer.

              “You were hogging the blankets, but it was stupid and I shouldn’t have done it. I’m your guys’ roadie, I’m not just some chic you can hook up with and dispose of whenever someone prettier comes along.”

              “Can you at least admit that you enjoyed it?” Tommy asked.

              “And if I do what does that mean?”

              Tommy was about to answer when the cashier came back with a box.

              “Seven please,” the drummer told him, reaching into his back pocket for cash. He gave you a look as he handed over the crumpled pills and grabbed the cigarettes off the counter.  The two of you waited by the door until Nikki and Mick finished loading cases of booze into their arms and paid as well.  As you had guessed, everyone else was loaded into the cab before Vince finally reappeared, hair looking a little more disheveled then when he had gone in and with a lipstick stain on his collar.

              “I should tell Sharon,” joked Nikki, punching the blond in the arm. You and Tommy both snickered from the back seat as Vince got in the cab.

              “Don’t you fuckin’ dare,” he warned, adjusting his collar to hide the lipstick.  Divvying up a six-pack of beer between you, Nikki leaned over the seat to you and Tommy.

              “You grabbed my cigs right?”

              “Got ‘em right here, man,” Tommy replied, handing over three of the packs to the bass player and taking a sip of his drink.  You were struggling to get the cap off; usually you had a counter or something to help.

              “Need a hand?” asked Tommy.

              “Yeah,” you admitted, handing the bottle over to him in defeat.  Not breaking eye contact, you watched the drummer pop the cap off with his teeth.  Giving you a big grin he handed the bottle back.

              “Very subtle,” you said with a laugh.

              “It impressed you, didn’t it?”

              “Impressed isn’t the word I’d use.  Maybe entertained?” you replied cheekily.  “The only thing impressive about you guys is how stupid you can be.”

              “Oooo ouch Y/N, harsh!” winced Nikki, him and Vince turning around to join your conversation.

              “Yeah, but I’m not wrong though,” you said.

              “If anyone other than you said that about us I’d bash their friggin’ skull in,” Vince commented, sipping on his beer.

              “She is mean, isn’t she?  Almost as bad as Sharon,” said Nikki.

              “Cuter though,” Tommy defended, patting your thigh affectionately.  Part of you didn’t want him to lift his hand.

              “It’s like having an annoying sister,” Vince concluded.

              “You guys would be so dead without me.”

              They totally would be dead somewhere in a ditch without you and Doc. Mostly Doc, but you’d like to think you’d helped Motley Crue a lot too.  You’d been travelling with them for years now, helping them get ready for shows, interviews, music videos, everything.  You could tell if one of them was about to puke way before it happened, and you could handle all of them pretty well when they were drunk and or high. Even though your job was supposed to be just loading and unloading equipment, you had taken up the roll of babysitter long before Doc suggested it.

              Taking a long swig of your beer, it was only a couple more minutes before you were all back at the hotel.  Pushing and shoving each other, you found Doc in the lobby still, waiting.

              “Hey, Doc,” you called, giving him a wave.  The four boys were trailing behind you guffawing about something.

              “I see you found what you were looking for,” Doc said, gesturing at the armfuls of booze the band was carrying.  He didn’t look amused.  

              “I’ll make sure they make it to their rooms,” you promised, putting an arm on Tommy’s shoulder and leading them all towards the elevator.  This hotel was fancier than the last one you had been at, and the elevator was made of glass.  Herding Motley Crue inside, you pressed the button for the 5th floor.  The sight that met your eyes when you turned around was one you should have seen coming. They were only one beer in, and they already had their pants down with their asses up against the glass, mooning everyone in the lobby.  You put a palm to your face and shook your head.

              “You guys are fucking ridiculous,” you muttered.  They were all laughing hysterically and looking over each other’s shoulders at the started on-lookers.  You couldn’t help but laugh a little yourself.  They were wild, but you loved them.  When the elevator arrived on the fifth floor, you gave them all the keys to their rooms.

              “No babysitting tonight, but you heard what Doc said earlier.  If there’s any kind of mischief, you can kiss your record deal goodbye,” you warned, slapping the room keys in each of their hands.

              “Yeah yeah,” promised Nikki, shooing you away with his free hand, the other clutching the almost empty beer bottle.  Waving goodbye, you watched them all go into their rooms, and when you were satisfied they were staying put, you went back to the lobby to join Doc.

                He wasn’t reading a newspaper anymore, but instead had a series of spreadsheets and notepads sprawled out over the table.

              “Can I help with anything?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at one of the complicated looking spreadsheets.  

              “A coffee would be nice,” Doc replied, scribbling something and pulling out a calculator.  “Trying to figure out how we’re going to make any money off this tour is proving more difficult than I’d like.  Everything is just going straight to damage claims.”

              “I’ll get that coffee,” you said, giving him a reassuring smile.  Doc was a real trooper.  You knew firsthand that managing Motley Crue was no easy task.  Wandering into the breakfast room of the hotel, you spotted the coffee bar.  Black with one sugar, the way he always like it.  You grabbed a cup for yourself as well before you walked back to Doc and handed him the cup.

              “Thanks, Y/N, you’re a saint.”

              “I try,” you smiled, sipping.

              “The boys give you any trouble?”

              “Nothing out of the ordinary.”

              “It seems like everything went good with Tommy the other night.”

              You choked and spat a little of your coffee back into the cup.

              “Sorry?”

              “Well he didn’t cause any trouble so everything must have gone well,” Doc said.

              “Oh… yeah, everything was fine.  We watched TV.”

              “Yeah, he mentioned something about Gilligan’s Island to me.”

              “Did he mention anything else?” you asked, worrying that Tommy might have said something else to Doc.

              “Nope, that was it.”

              You let out a sigh of relief and took another sip of coffee.

              “Only a few more weeks of this tour, right?”

              “Yep, thank god.  I don’t know how much more of their bitching I can handle.  I’m surprised they’re not at each other’s throats yet,” muttered Doc, rubbing his temples and exchanging his pen for the cup of coffee.  “You’ve been a real help, especially with Tommy.”

              “I really don’t know why you think Tommy listens to me more than anyone else,” you said, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

              “He’s got a bigger heart than the rest of them.”

              “And what does that have to do with anything?”

              “He’s got a bit of a soft spot for you.”

              “Did he tell you that?”

              “Nikki told me.”

              “Ahh,” you sighed, taking another sip of coffee.  So Nikki knew something was up between you and Tommy, at least as far as Tommy’s end was concerned.  People had started nick-naming the two of them the Terror Twins, so you shouldn’t have been surprised Nikki knew more about Tommy.

              Absorbed in your coffee, you and Doc hung out in the lobby for a while. The peace and quiet was nice, since you didn’t get it very often anymore.  You read through a bunch of magazines, and then around 9pm you decided to go check on the band.

                Mick was lying in bed with his eyes closed and his hands crossed over his chest, looking very much like a gothic ancient Egyptian mummy.  You didn’t think he was asleep because his guitar was on the bed next to him and some papers were scattered around.  He’d probably been working on some new material.

              Vince’s door had the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign on it, but that wasn’t enough to stop you.  It was the not one but two female voices from inside that made the decision to keep the door closed very easy.  You’d walked in on enough of the blond’s sexual escapades to know what kinds of sights would greet you on the other side of that door.

              You didn’t hear anything from Nikki’s room, which surprised you a little, so you checked inside.  No Nikki, just a bunch of empty bottles and his base.  His jacket had a new rip in it, and wherever he was, he was barefoot because his boots and socks were near the window.  Great.

              There was a shout from the room next door, Tommy’s, and you mentally braced yourself for whatever was coming next.  Letting yourself in, the first thing you saw was a half-naked Tommy with a tie around his forehead.  Where the tie had come from you had no idea.  Nikki was cackling away on the bed, a vodka bottle in his hand, mostly empty.

              “For the love of god, you two, what’s so funny?” you asked, closing the door behind you and assessing the rest of the damage.  Nothing seemed to be broken yet, but most of the bedding was on the floor and the sink was running.

              “Tommy thinks he does a good Elvis impression,” chuckled Nikki, taking a long swig out of his bottle.  Tommy also had a bottle in his hand you noted, and there were about a dozen more littering the carpet.  You shut the sink off.

              “Come on Tommy, do it again for Y/N!” begged Nikki before collapsing into hysterics again.  The drummer gave you a big goofy grin and cleared his throat before beginning to sing the lyrics to Hound Dog.  

              “You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

              Cryin' all the time

              You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

              Cryin' all the time

              Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit and you ain't no friend of mine,” he sang.  He was certainly no Elvis, but it was funny none the less.  You were halfway through laughing yourself when you caught the tell-tale sign that Tommy was about to puke.  

              “Tommy,” you said.  “Hand me the bottle.”

              “No,” he whined, lifting it above your head where he knew you couldn’t reach.

              “Give it.”

              “Noooo you have to come get-“

              One dry heave, two dry heaves, you pushed the drummer into the bathroom right before he threw up into the toilet.  While he was barfing his guts out, you slowly pulled the bottle out of his hands and put it back in the fridge.  Turning to Nikki, you let him polish off the rest of what was in his bottle then shooed him out the door.

              “Go back to your room Nik,” you said, watching to make sure the bassist made it back before you returned to Tommy’s side.  Holding his hair back, you patted him on the back.

              “This is what happens when you drink too fast,” you scolded lightly.

              “Shut up,” croaked Tommy, heaving once more into the toilet before standing up and wiping his mouth.  “I’m just outta practice.”

              “Whatever helps you sleep at night,” you shrugged.

              “This tour fucking sucks, the only thing good that’s really happened was you sleeping in my bed.”

              You paused.  You knew Tommy was very drunk right now which meant very little of what he was saying was to be taken seriously, but this seemed different than the usual drunken banter you two had.  There was a good chance he wouldn’t remember this conversation the next morning so you decided to indulge him.

              “Doc seems to think you have a soft spot for me,” you said, hoping Tommy would give himself away so you could stop overthinking things.

              “Mmm Nikki snitched on me, fuck.”

              Tommy leaned against the counter while you grabbed a plastic cup from the kitchen and filled it with water.  Handing it to the drummer, you continued.

              “So it’s true then?” you inquired.

              “Nikki was supposed to keep his damn mouth shut.  I know nothing will ever happen between us because it’ll fuck things up for you.”

              “You’re not wrong about that,” you said.  “It’s probably not a good idea for the roadie to hook up with the rock star.”

              Tommy downed the cup of water in one gulp.  He tried to walk over to the bed on his own, but he was wobbling so you steadying him with your arm.  Pulling his boots off for him, you let him roll into the middle of the bed before you threw one of the blankets back on.  

              “I never wanted it to be just a hook up anyway,” grumbled Tommy into his pillow.  “But you don’t want that, so I’ll just keep pretending I don’t feel anything so I don’t fuck shit up for you.”

              His words were muffled, but they were bringing a tear into your eye.  How long had this been going on for?  How long had Tommy had feelings for you?  And the bigger question, how long had you had feelings for him?  There was no way this had just started a week ago.      

              “Tommy,” you started.

              “I’m sorry for being an ass last week Y/N, I shouldn’t have made you sleep in my bed.”

              He looked so cute with his head buried in his pillow, hair splayed out across it. You didn’t even mind the fact that he smelled like vodka, you were used to it anyway.

              “You didn’t make me do anything,” you said, slowly letting your jacket and shoes fall to the floor.  This was one of your worst ideas and you knew it, but you climbed into bed with Tommy anyway. Wriggling into his side, you caught just a little bit of the Tommy smell you loved so much under the vodka odor. You felt him nuzzle his face in your hair and wrap his arm protectively around your middle.  You could feel his heart beat on your back and wondered if he could tell how fast yours was beating.  Part of you wanted this so bad, but the other part knew it was only going to wind up causing you trouble.  Maybe even costing you your job that you’d worked so hard for.  But being curled up in Tommy’s arms felt so good and it wasn’t long before your eyes drooped shut, the two of you almost asleep.  You felt Tommy pull you closer to him and whisper against your shoulder.

              “I think I love you.”

***

AHHHH I still can’t believe how much you guys like this I really hope I didn’t disappoint with part 2.  I have a few fics that I’ll be working on the next couple days, but my requests are still open.  Let me know if you want me to tag you in anything!

[writingpuddle]

hi for the prompt maybe mini andreil? as in they are childhood friends. neil has uncle stuart and andrew has bee and they are like 11&12 and fooling around with each other :D

Yess!!! I subbed in Wymack for stuart because there will never be enough Dadmack in this world for me. thanks anon!

I would…be open to writing more oneshots in this universe. Warningsfor (very) vague references to child abuse vis-a-vis Neil’s dad and Andrew’s time in foster care.

 —

“It’s so unfaaaair,” Neil whined, ripping a chunk of grass out of the ground. “Kevin gets to go.”

“Kevin is twelve,” Andrew said. “You’re not.”

“I’m way better than any of the other twelve-year-old’s on Kevin’s team.”

Andrew rolled his eyes. Kevin had been away at Exy summer camp for a day and a half, and Neil would not shut up about it. “You’re too short to play with the bigger kids.”

Neil scowled, ripping up some more grass and dumping it on Andrew’s legs. “I’m not that short. I’m almost as tall as you.”

“Are not.”

“Are so!”

“Are not.”

Neil flopped on his back, heaving a big sigh. “I hate summer.”

“You’re a loser.”

Neil chucked another handful of grass at him. The wind caught it and blew half of it into Andrew’s face. He spluttered, spitting grass out of his mouth while Neil laughed. His reddish-brown hair fell into his eyes and Andrew’s chest did a weird squeezy thing, his face going warm.  

Andrew kicked him in the leg. “I hate you.”

Neil grinned up at him. “Do you think Coach would let us borrow a couple racquets?”

“Why?”

“So we can go play at the park.”

“What if I don’t want to play Exy?”

“I’m bored.”

“That’s your problem.”

“You’re such a jerk,” Neil muttered, rolling onto his stomach. “Do you want to go swimming? We could go up to the lake. You could borrow Kevin’s bike.”

“You don’t even like swimming.”

“I don’t like swimming with my class. They always stare at me.”

“Why?”

Neil shredded grass between his fingers, shrugging. “Because I’m messed up.”

“You’re not messed up.”

Neil kept ripping up grass, not looking at Andrew. “My dad used to…hurt me. When I was bad, or too loud, or he was angry. It’s really ugly.”

The warmth in Andrew’s chest went out as if he’d plunged into icy water. He grabbed Neil’s chin, pulling his face up until he had to meet Andrew’s gaze. His blue eyes went wide, staring up at Andrew.

“Neil. Is he—” He couldn’t finish the sentence. Phantom hands tugged at his hair and a wave of fierce protectiveness washed over him. He’d never let anyone hurt Neil like that. Never. “We could tell Bee. You don’t have to stay here.”

“What?” Neil’s expression cleared. “Not Coach. No, Andrew, it’s okay. I’m adopted.”

“Oh,” Andrew said, sitting back on his heels. He dropped his hand a second later, the sudden fear blowing out of him like a candle in the breeze. 

A smile peeked out of Neil’s eyes as he leaned forward, poking Andrew in the stomach. “It’s okay. I forgot I didn’t tell you.”

Andrew hunched his shoulders, embarrassment creeping up the back of his neck. “You don’t even call him dad. I should have guessed.”

“It’s fine,” Neil said, rolling over and sprawling in the grass. 

The breeze washed the smell of budding flowers and freshly cut grass over them. The meadow behind Coach’s house was a riot of colours, a tiny creek burbling just out of sight. Andrew couldn’t think of anything to say to cover up his bungle. He should’ve known that Neil was like him. It was why they’d become friends in the first place.

“My dad was a really bad person,” Neil said, breaking the silence. “My mom took me away when I was seven. She and Kevin’s mom were friends, so she left me with Coach. She said she’d come back for me when it was safe.”

Andrew waited for a long second, but there was nothing more forthcoming. “She never came back.”

Neil stared upwards, eyes distant. “No.”

Andrew lay down beside Neil,staring up at the sky. Lines of clouds streaked the sky, like the knitted sweaters Bee was always making. Neil shifted until their arms were touching and Andrew found he didn’t mind.

“I’m adopted too,” he said. “I was in foster care before Bee found me.”

“Oh,” Neil said, rolling onto his side to study Andrew with his too-blue eyes. “What was foster care like?”

Andrew closed his eyes against the memories pressing against the inside of his skin. He took a deep breath, leaning into Neil’s warmth, grounding himself with the breeze, the tickle of grass against the back of his neck. “Bad,” he said.

Neil made a quiet, understanding sort of noise. Andrew sat up abruptly, grabbing Neil’s arm and hauling him to his feet.

“What are you doing?” Neil asked, scrambling to get his feet under him.

“Going to get some racquets,” Andrew said, pulling Neil towards the house. “The lake sucks, anyway.”

Neil’s face lit up and he ranahead, pushing the sliding door open and skidding into the living room. “Coooooach!” he shouted, his voice echoing. 

Andrew stepped over the doorway into Neil’s living room. There were dozens of pictures up on the wall of Neil’s family. The biggest one hung over the fireplace, an image of Coach with Kevin and Neil on either side of him, wearing their little league uniforms. Beside it was a slightly smaller frame with a little black ribbon in the corner, holding an image of Kevin and a woman with matching bright green eyes.

Coffee rings and empty mugs covered all available surfaces, and stacks of books and files littered the floor. It would drive Bee mad, Andrew thought.

Coach Wymack emerged from his study, rubbing his eyes. “What do you want?”

Neil was completely unperturbed by his adopted-dad’s gruff tone. “Can Andrew and I borrow racquets?”

Wymack blinked down at him. “School ended three days ago and you want to play Exy already?”

“Pleeeeease?”

Coach huffed, ruffling Neil’s hair. “Go ahead. Take your phone with you.”

“Yes! Thank you!” He grabbed Coach around the middle, squeezing quickly before dashing off into the hallway.

Andrew felt a familiar turn in his stomach at being alone in a room with an adult man, but he took a deep breath, counting like Bee had taught him. Wymack was safe; if Neil trusted him, Andrew would too.

“Do you have a phone?” Wymack asked.

Andrew nodded.

“Good. Neil always forgets to charge his. Call me if you need anything.”

“Okay.”

Neil appeared in the doorway, arms full of gear. “Are you coming?”

Andrew gave Wymack a nod and followed Neil into the hallway. Exy was kind of annoying, especially with Kevin getting super competitive at practice all the time.

With Neil, though, it was kind of fun. Not that he’d ever tell Neil that.

[sprydecreates]

ferry lookout

requested: nope

warnings: mentions of drinking, language

pairings: calum hood x reader

type: fluff w an angst scene ; headcanon/list ; 3.4k+ words ; gender neutral

summary: you and college!calum finally thought you had found something with each other. too bad there was a miscommunication. or is it?

a/n: i originally intended for this to be a valentine’s day thing, but it never felt right for it. so i spruced it up, and i think it finally feels decent.

i’ve been off my writing game for a bit, so i’m sorry if it feels different halfway through (this is due to being off me game and also changing the idea completely). hope you like it either way! i think it’s sweet.

it was a kind of restless night, and you and calum were having a drive to a lookout.

everyone had things to do, except cal.

ash had a night at the club

mike and luke were studying for an exam they both had the following day

so, cal texted you and asked if you wanted to hang out.

you and calum exchanged numbers the semester before

you sat together for economics, and contacted each other for homework help usually

since it was during spring semester, you both went your separate ways for summer, and didn’t really contact each other

there were the occasional likes on instagram, and texts of memes about how awful the professor was, but nothing else

pretty much an excuse for you two to still talk

you both thought the other was cute, but you didn’t know how to come forward with it. as, you could see, all you two talked about was class, and memes relating to the class

when classes started again, you got a text from calum asking what you were taking

you didn’t have any of the same classes, as your majors were polar opposites

but, he did wish you a good year, and said if you needed any help with your math course, he’d be glad to help

you two spoke every other day, but nothing huge

the lookout was popular with locals, but you hadn’t ever went up there, or heard of it rather, so calum insisted that was where you two would go.

initially, you were just going to grab some late night snacks and head back to his apartment

but on the way, you passed the lookout.

“where’s that little road go?”

“what do you mean where does it go?”

“uh, like, is there a house up there?”

calum pointed to the lookout sign, “are you talking about that one? with the huge ass sign saying ‘ferry lookout’?”

“so, it leads to a lookout?”

“...have you never been?”

“no..? is it big or something?”

calum gives you a playful side eye, then focuses on the road again, “i’ve been up there so many times i can’t count. i can’t believe you’ve never heard of this place. this calls for a change of plans, we’re going up there.”

so, after grabbing your respective late night favorites, you and calum headed towards the lookout.

on the drive, you took this opportunity to ask calum how long he has lived here

“uhh, like. five years, maybe?” calum answered while turning into the road to the lookout.

“ah, i see. so you’re from australia, right?”

“yup. accent give it away?”

“yeah, i mean i noticed you say your i’s like ‘oi’. like you pronounce your friend michael’s name as ‘moie-kol’. but i noticed on instagram that that’s where you went for summer, and you have sydney as your hometown.”

“oh, yeah. i always go back home for the summer to see my family.”

“wait so you’re out here on your own?”

the car neared the parking spaces for the overlook, and calum parked the car in the middle of the lot before continuing his story, “yup. i, well, me and my friends, moved here when we were younger for our band. i was about seventeen at the time.” calum reached into the 7-eleven bag and popped open his bag of pretzels, “we moved here because our first album went kinda big, at least on social media. so we made the choice to pack up, and see what america had for us. we got here, got too cocky, and it all went to shit. had to go back home for a little, live with my parents, save enough money, and then came back.”

“well?” you had already gotten your snack ready, munching from time to time while calum spoke.

“you want the full story?” he glanced over to you, chuckling a bit after seeing you scrunched up in the passenger seat, eager to hear his story for once.

“hell yeah! i wanna know what happened to this band of yours. pleeeeease?”

he quickly swallowed the pretzel he was chewing, and took a gulp of his slurpee, “okay okay, fine. we’re called bromance, by the way. but after we came back, we were still together, just not so hard. like, instead of us making music for fame, we made it because we wanted to. like we sat back in straya talking about what we needed to do, cause we went from thinking we’d hit it big, to having to ask our parents for money for a plane ticket back home. we already had two year leases on two apartments, and we couldn’t exactly break them, so we worked until we had enough money to cover a few months rent on our own, and then we came back. got more jobs, and stabled ourselves.”

you nodded, and closed your jaw which had been slacking with admiration, “is that why you went to college here too?”

he nodded back to you, “mhm. that’s why i’m twenty-two and in second year classes still - i could only afford to take like three courses per semester, if that.”

you held up a hand and shook your head, tilting it downward while doing so, “no judging here, i’m only here because i won a scholarship. i’d be back in my hometown in the local community college if it wasn’t for it, honestly.”

calum raised an eyebrow, “damn, you got a scholarship?”

“yeah, i wrote an essay about my life struggles, and they gave it to me.” you shrugged, and then realized how ungrateful you sounded, “don’t get me wrong, i’m grateful for it, i just don’t see how i got in with it.”

calum pushed and stretched out his bottom lip in both agreement and confusion before he spoke, “well, it must’ve been good if you got in.”

“eh, whatever. tell me more about you, though. i wanna know about your family, and this little bird named ‘mali’ you have tattooed on you.”

for the next hour or so, you and calum explored each others past, and present. the conversation kind of went dry when it came back to this lookout, as you two pretty much knew everything about it that you needed to.

calum was staring out at the vast lights carrying the city to sleep, and he spoke softly to keep the mood, “i still can’t believe you’ve been here for two years and you haven’t been up here. it’s like, the most romantic spot i know.”

you scoffed, raising your hand and shooing off his last comment, “bold of you to assume anyone has asked me on a date since i got here.”

he scrunched the left side of his lip up while looking over to you, “you’re kidding.”

“well, halfway,” you began, lightly speaking with your hands, “i’ve been asked out, but it’s only to fuck.”

calum turns his head back to the view, “i can see that. i never got that bit; i love going on dates, and hanging out and stuff. i don’t know why it’s been looked at as a joke from 2017 on.”

“right?!” you snap your head to calum, “it’s like, what the fuck ever happened to just chilling with a person for a couple of weeks or something and getting to know them that way instead of playing an over-sexualized game of twenty-one questions?”

calum widened his eyes, pointing his index finger at you while you spoke, “honestly!” you two exchanged feelings about current relationships standards and past relationship complications, until it got kind of serious on calum’s ends: “that’s why i don’t really believe in love. cause like, i always try to be a nice guy, like an actually nice one and not a ‘m’lady’ neckbeard thing, but i always get fucked over. and i try, but it’s like, why even attempt if you know something will never come to you?”

you sighed, nodding along with what he was saying, “i get that. but at the same time, you gotta look at the world around you. there’s what, nine or ten billion people in the world that you haven’t met?”

“yeah, but it’s like, if i were meant to fall in love, shouldn’t i have already found a trace of something real?”

you raised your eyebrows, gaining a stern but gentle tone with him, “calum you can’t base love off of what you got when you were seventeen and in your first real relationship. we were kids, and we’re bound to break ‘love’, no matter what age we are. people fall in love at forty, some at twenty - some with their hometown best friend, some with a person halfway across the world. love isn’t dead because it didn’t happen to you like it did in the movies. wouldn’t you rather have something real as to something scripted?”

and with that, calum mentally took note, and decided maybe he’d give love a chance again.

but, that was roughly four and a half months ago.

it was now the end of april, and you and calum had gotten closer than ever.

after the night drive and you both got home safely, he texted you and said, “Thanks for a fun night. It’s cliche as hell, but I think you’ve opened my eyes a bit. Hope to hang soon.”

of course, you two hung out two days after. and two days after that. and after that, and so on.

it was really cute though

lots of sweet banter

couple of deep conversations at each others apartments at two in the morning

which would turn into sleep overs after you two talked more

comments on instagram that were kinda flirty, but still open-ended

any lovey dovey stuff, really

your notes on calum:

really, really good guy. god tier guy.

very romantic, but not a huge fan of pda

humble

insecure but passes it off as humor and refuses to take a compliment or believe someone might like him

offers you hoodies when it’s upwards of seventy-five degrees inside

has made you several home cooked meals

doesn’t shame you or put you down if you’re having bad mental health days and need space

says your name reeeeaaaalllly giggly if he’s feeling soft

knows stan language and actually made a stan account for his own band to secretly interact with fans because you told him about an au where that happens

he of course didn’t tell you to make a stan account for him so you can recreate said au

brought you back a surfboard key chain with your name on it from his trip to australia for christmas

you’re in love with him

calum’s notes on you:

realistic

pushy in the right ways

honest, but sometimes in a backhanded compliment type of way

fashion forward, has given him a couple of new styles to work with

encourages him to try new things and to fully be himself

plays with his hair in order for him to fall asleep

leads to cuddling because he had his arm around your waist and head on your upper torso

gives him confidence to try out ‘feminine’ things (painted nails, (heart stud) earrings, etc)

up to talk about his problems with him

gets along with his friends, and doesn’t act weird because they went viral a couple of times

also interacts with fans as though you’re a stan account yourself

stays around to help with homework, even if you don’t know a thing about what he’s doing

comfortable silence is brought up here too

he’s in love with you

spring is of course, the season of budding romance. or, at least it is to you.

you know, flowers blooming, warm sunsets and seeing each other in golden hour, an overwhelming sense of acoustic guitar playing in the background; that sort of thing.

so, you know what that means?

you decide to ask calum out on a date.

yeah, you! you know he likes you, what could go wrong? 

on a friday evening, you got dressed up, and decided to take calum on a fancy dinner date.

you were ready to go at about six, and gave calum a ring.

“hey (y/n)!”

“hey calum,” you were smiling ear to ear at this point, “whatcha up to?”

“eh, nothing too big. what about you?”

“oh, you’re up to something?”

“umm! kinda but not really?”

your smile drooped, and your tone changed, “oh, alright. cool.”

calum was silent for a second before speaking in a concerned, soft tone, “everything alright?”

you were breathing in through your nose to stop the tears brimming, “yeah, not a problem. i’ll leave you to it. see you.”

what the fuck?!!?!!!!!!!!!!/!?!!!!!!!!!e,me39834,m?!?!?!?

calum? going out????

he wasn’t seeing anyone?E>.dW>QDLWE<

oh my god it was that girl commenting on his pictures that he followed back

he played you

oh my GOD he played you and you LET IT HAPPEN. YOU THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE FOR YOU AND HE SAT AND SWEET TALKED YOU INTO BELIEVING HE LIKED YOU TOO AND PROBABLY GOT MAD BECAUSE YOU DIDN’T LET HIM HIT IT YET

YOU KNEW WHEN HE SAID HE WASN’T A M’LADY HEADASS THAT HE WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

coincidentally, your best friend, (y/f/n) called:

“hello?”

“hey! whats up?”

since you and calum were never an official ‘thing’ (even though you told your friends you thought something would happen), you decided to keep it calm, “not a thing, why?”

“wanna come help me get ready? i’m going to the club an-”

“sure, be over in ten.”

(y/f/n) seemed a bit off, but you didn’t really pay attention. you were just trying to get wasted, and throw away the feelings you thought were finally, fine.

this being said, you two jetted to the club.

“hey, (y/n)?” (y/f/n) asked, turning their head to face you.

you turned your head to (y/f/n) while you waited in line to get into the building, “what?”

“is everything, like, good?”

you turned away from them, nodding once, “i’m gonna make it be.”

about an hour and a half after you both got into the club, you received a text from calum.

“You busy?”

left on read

“If u sent something, I never got it”

left on read

“Is everything okay?”

left on read

“Dude what’s going on?”

you rolled your eyes, and angrily slid your phone onto the table in front of you, grabbing what’s left of your second drink and taking a swig. (y/f/n) watched and started to question.

“what’s up?”

you finally broke, “calum.”

(y/f/n) rose an eyebrow, “what about him?”

you sighed, “i finally thought we were gonna be something. i thought he liked me, but right when i got up the courage to ask him out, he told me he had something planned.”

(y/f/n)’s eyes widened, and they started to stutter, “he uh, he said he had something, planned? when? like right now?”

you nodded while you spoke, “yeah,” your hand flew from the crossed position it was in and pointed to your upside down phone, “right before you called, he told me he had something to do.”

“what do you think he’s doing?”

“no clue. he usually tells me he’s going out with his band mates, cause he had to call me one night to help him get one of ‘em home. so he’s always told me to keep me on standby. this time, he seemed really giddy, and like nervous.” you sat quiet for a few seconds, debating on whether or not to stop yourself from tearing up again, “so i’m guessing he found someone and didn’t wanna tell me.”

(y/f/n) picked up their phone halfway through you speaking, probably to look people up to mark out suspected people for later, “i dunno (y/n), i think you’re over thinking a bit.”

you gave (y/f/n) a defeated sigh, shrugging afterwards, “i don’t know. i mean i hope not, but i’m not gonna hold my breath.”

after a few minutes of tense silence, (y/f/n) suggests you two leave, and head back to your apartment to talk.

on the way back, you got to complain about how you thought calum was made for you.

(y/f/n) did keep smiling weirdly. were they the one calum was seeing?   

thoughts came to a standstill, though.

why?

calum’s car was in the parking lot.

or at least it looked like it. you didn’t have his tag memorized, obviously.

(y/f/n) parked, and finally turned to you with a not really well hidden smile, “sorry you thought something was up.”

you had your eyebrows furrowed, “what?”

all they said was, “have fun,” and ushered you out of their car.

you, although confused, walked up to the front door and started towards your room.

when you unlocked your door, you heard a soft guitar playing from what sounded like your living room.

you tiptoed into the dimly lit room, and turned the light switch on. there sat calum, a yellow tinted acoustic guitar sat on his thigh as he strummed it, and started to sing the good side by troye sivan.

it was one of those songs you told calum about, and how it reminded you of him.

not in a ‘we broke up and one of us felt worse than the other’ way, but more or less, ‘we’ll meet in the spring’, as you two did come back to each other during that season; ‘traveled the universe twice’, where he came from australia and stayed by fate; ‘i got the good side’, as you found growth and goodness through each other in hard times. so, in a ‘i love you, and the universe wanted us together’ way.

throughout the song, you had found yourself sat in front of calum, your heart beating as though you had just ran a marathon, and it only sped up as the song ended.

you sat with your palms pressed against the insides of your calves, staring at calum as he let a wide smile settle on his face. he spoke while he sat his guitar on the table in front of the couch where you both sat, “sorry about lying.”

you finally found the strength to whisper, “about?”

he had positioned himself closer to you, now looking into your eyes, “being busy. i mean, i was kinda busy, setting this place up and all.”

you took the opportunity to look around for once, seeing that he had picked up a bundle of your favorite flowers, and scattered them around the room. he had a couple of candles lit that you had smelled since you walked in. and you didn’t know if he meant to, but he was wearing the shirt he wore when you two went to the overlook for the first time.

after taking it all in, you turned back to him, “you did this, all, for me?”

he nodded, giggling a little at your surprise, “mhm. you look beautiful, by the way.”

“wait, did you know?”

“know what?”

“that i liked you?”

“wait, you?” he cocked his head to the side, trying to form a sentence.

“yeah? i was going to take you out to dinner tonight, and like when you said you were busy, that’s why i got so distant, cause i you know thought you were entertaining someone and i got jealous-”

you were cut off by calum cupping your cheeks, “i’m so sorry, i didn’t think to word it differently i just thought you were having like, a night or something and got annoyed not because you thought i liked someone else.”

your palms found their way to calum’s cheeks as well, “no it’s nothing now, i just got freaked out and overreacted without giving you a chance. i’m sorry too.” calum had started to rub his thumbs against your cheekbones, and it threw off your thought process a bit.

this was all you wanted. this, is all you wanted, and it’s right here in front of you; rambling, and shaking, and loving.

“please.” you shook out of your realization, and asked him to repeat himself, “kiss me, please. i’ll pay you if need be.”

to say the least, he paid you in rent money when he moved in five months later, in tickets used to meet his and your family, in presents exchanged during holidays, in a down payment on a house, in baby clothes for your four dogs, and obviously, in all the love he had ever given / had for anyone he had ever met: you. his soulmate that he fell in love with due to an unplanned first date.

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching SPN 14x13 “Lebanon” (300th episode)

in which i compare this episode to pumpkin soup, because I’m craving more Cas

03:30pm

all righty, thing is still downloading, and there’s a 720p version queued up so that’ll be downloaded by the time i’ve watched half. i have snacks, i’m gonna half close my blinds so i can see, but I DON’T HAVE HEADPHONES AGAIN which is the worst. why do headphones break so easily, that’s what i want to know. (just gotta pray there’s a good sound quality i guess. my laptop speakers suck)

...2 minutes left on the download c’moooooon

-

03:35

OKAY DONE!!!!

-

03:36

“dad’s on a hunting trip and he hasn’t been home in a few days”

i don’t know if it’s dean’s little baby voice (HE’S MY AGE CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?? I CAN’T) or the laptop speakers or the video sound quality, but dean sounds like a kid in a 1980s disney cartoon, with that vintage prickle in my ears and i love it

-

03:38

okay look it’s super hot 'cause it’s summer, and my fan is on, and there’s cicadas... i think i gotta shut the window and turn the fan off aND SLOWLY ROAST IN HERE BECAUSE I CAN’T HEAR THIS PROPERLY

i’m 9 seconds into the recap u_u

it’s gonna be one of those days i guess

-

03:41

is that the monkey again?

yeah it’s the monkey again

-

03:45

dead black guy already????????????????????

really?????

-

03:46

are those kids meant to look like the kids from stranger things? because they kind of do. and the movie theatre as well

-

03:47

cas is in this episode, right??

if he isn’t i’m gonna scream

misha had a tv guide cover so maybe

-

03:39

every single one of these kids is cute and i’m offended

“weird sidekick with the trenchcoat” i am further offended, but also smiling

-

03:50

SHE GAY

SHE VERY GAY

-

the plaid though. she’s a dean mirror 100%

edit: i did doubt this for a second but nope, i was completely right

i mean, she drives the car as well

-

03:52

tHE IMPALA JUST SCOOTED OFF THE SCREEN AND I ALMOST CHOKED OH MY GOD that was hilarious

-

03:54

dean doing the puppy eyes is 

a) cute

b) FUCKING TERRIFYING BECAUSE THIS POOR WOMAN’S TRYING TO PROTECT AN UNDERAGE GIRL AND IT SHOULD NOT BE THAT EASY

-

03:57

the hand that popped out of the smoky cigar box

SUPER COOL AND SUPER CREEPY EW

-

03:59

dean: “this is like the best/worst thing that’s ever happened to you. ‘cause you love serial killers but you hate clowns”

ahahhahaha

-

04:02

sam: “are you sure you don’t wanna call mom, or wait for cas”

YES PLEASE DO BOTH OF THOSE THINGS ;A;

-

“michael out of my head”

HAVE YOU NEVER PAID ATTENTION TO ALL THE WISHES THAT GO WRONG??? YOU GOTTA BE MORE SPECIFIC DUDE. TAKING MICHAEL OUT YOUR HEAD JUST TAKES HIM OUT, YOU GOTTA KILL HIM TOO DAMMIT

-

04:05

john: “now you live in a secret bunker with an angel and lucifer’s kid”

he took that surprisingly well

 a little too well

probably part of dean’s wish that he takes it well

-

04:08

OH BOY

the face he made when he saw mary sdjgfd

-

04:09

ahahah dean and sam awkwardly leaving while their parents make out

dean kinda looked like he was gonna stay, lil bean

-

04:11

the fact dean was so adamant that he said he wanted michael out of his head, but then is now defending the fact he wished for his dad back instead

says a lot about what dean says he wants =/= what dean actually wants

-

04:13

john is much sweeter and more understanding than anyone remembers him (at least than i remember him, or could infer from all the stories about him)

i really do think dean brought him back nicer

-

04:15

i love seeing sam have emotions, it’s so refreshing

-

sam kinda looked like he panicked when john touched him aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

-

04:17

there’s a sign for “castle storage” in the background and i think about that sometimes. hill of a forty dogs or something??? i forget, it was so long ago

-

ALSO WHERE’S CAS

also switching to 720p now

never mind switching back, the sound was better on the lower quality video u_u

-

04:22

oh no, nobody knows them

IS CAS NOT GONNA KNOW THEM

OH NO

-

04:23

this universe-sam: *kinda smug* “god bless kale, am i right?”

I CRINGED SO HARD

-

04:25

OH BOY IT’S HAPPENING

(well SOMETHING IS HAPPENING)

-

04:26

zachariah: “c’mon, constantine”

cas: “i don’t understand that reference”

zach: “you wouldn’t”

i kinda missed this cas though. like. i’m not even mad

ONE PROBLEM: HE’S PROBABLY NOT HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH DEAN

-

04:28

life goal of mine: have a sign like that in my house as decor

-

04:29

THE BACKWARDS TIE

-

04:35

okay first off i got so involved watching cas beat dean up (again) and dean being unable to stop him (D: D: D:) (kind of expected dean to croak “i love you” but um no....... that didn’t happen)

and then mary’s egg timer went off 

and it reminded me i’m hungry again so brb

well actually i’m not hungry..... but my body is shutting down because i need fat and magnesium to function which means i need to eat or else i can’t see, but same difference

-

04:43pm

okay i’m back

-

04:45

DEAN FINALLY HEARING HIS DADDY SAY HE’S PROUD OF HIM

-

04:46

john: “i thought you’d get yourself a normal life, a peaceful life, a family”

dean: “i have a family”

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

]]]]]] I REALLY FUCKING WANT JOHN TO MEET CAS [[[[[[[

-

04:48

THERE’S SALAD ON THE PLATES HALLELUJAH

-

04:49

sam: “did you see them, at dinner, the way they looked at each other, they seemed happy”

and then there’s the way max looked at the girl she was crushing on

AND THEN THERE’S THE WAY DEAN LOOKS AT CAS LET’S GET SOME OF THAT IN HERE PLEEEEEASE

-

04:51

it stresses me out when people wash dishes but only rinse using the dirty water not fresh tap water

-

04:53

they’re about to send john back, he’s holding mary’s hand

all the rainbows behind dean’s head

betcha he’s thinkin about cas

-

04:56

john: “i love you both, so much”

dean...................

-

“i love you too”

OH MY HEART

he says it ......he never used to say it to anyone

-

04:59

YEEEEE

BUT ALSO THIS ONLY LASTED 0.5 SECONDS WHY

but also???????

TALL GUY = SAM

PLAID GIRL = DEAN

COAT GIRL = CAS

IS ANYONE ELSE GETTING THIS

WHY DIDN’T THIS SHOT LAST LONGER SO PEOPLE WOULD BE ABLE TO SEE WITHOUT PAUSING

CURSE YOU EDITORS

-

05:02

so....... that end scene where john’s like “i’m on my way back, i’ll see you soon”

was that meant to be in the past, 2003 era? the flip phone would say so, but his visible age kind of confuses matters

i mean i get that it’s hard to make someone look 16 years younger

but still

unsure about that

-

05:04

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm it’s over

i dunno

that was definitely a special and important episode, and i appreciated seeing this side of john, this is gonna make it way easier to write fanfic of him without the story ending up as a trauma survival fic

but

i was kind of underwhelmed

things i rEALLY REALLY WANTED that didn’t happen:

john actually reacting to dean saying they made friends with an angel (and a werewolf, a vampire, demons, etc etc)

john meeting cas

cas being part of that family meal (i get that the point was he was 2003!cas and not there, but still)

jack being in this even a little bit??

and as the story went on and reached the end, what it really lacked, for me, was a comparison where we can then see how john/mary & max/her crush = dean/cas...........and that just didn’t happen

i think it just ended too soon, really

and there was a lot more they could’ve done with the altered timeline, could’ve brought a whooooooooole lot back from past seasons and just made it a smorgasbord of nostalgia

i get that it was focused solely on john, which gave it an emotional core, so there’s not actually a problem there, i loved that

but it felt kind of dull and slow and....... soupy..........?

(i just mean. the emotional feeling in my brain as i think about it. feels like soup. specifically pumpkin soup. warm and spicy and goopy and nutritious but ultimately not very filling)

then again, if the pacing had been sped up, i would’ve complained it was too rushed. so there’s no winning, it was probably fine ?

i think my favourite part was the kids. i loved the kids. i love the lil gay romance going there. i loved the fact it was a destiel/team free will parallel (even if that part of it was OVER SO DAMN QUICKLY MOST PEOPLE MISSED IT). i loved the kid in the hat, he reminded me a lot of the actor thomas brodie-sangster, and also johnathan byers from “stranger things”

also enjoyed sam vs. the serial killer clown, and that whole aspect of hunting that we haven’t seen in a while, felt very nostalgic

also enjoyed 2003!cas, but was both distressed and frustrated by him fighting dean and then NOT GETTING ANY CLOSURE ON THAT WHATSOEVER. the point was to make dean and sam realise they really needed to send john back, so essentially, in some respect, they did choose cas being their friend over john being around, but that part of the overall problem was never mentioned at all, cas wasn’t mentioned at all after the fight

i’m just looking forward to coda fics that start where this episode leaves off, and dean talks to cas, because i am craving that SO FUCKING BADLY i can’t even express. like. it’s becoming maddening. i just. want. them. to have. a conversation

and the black guy dying at the start?? and the other black kid running away from the ghost and never being seen again? and besides the unnamed diner guy offering info on skip day, being the ONLY PEOPLE OF COLOUR IN THE ENTIRE STORY??? NOT COOL, not a fan >:{ (still better than it used to be, but soooooooooo many white people. so many. so. many)

anyway. um

so that wasn’t my favourite episode, but not because it was bad, but because it didn’t live up to expectations. i tried not to have any expectations (i really tried) but there were just... basic things this episode needed that i felt it was lacking (*cough* cas *cough*), and i can’t really shake that feeling

HOWEVER, having seen 2003!cas be the thoughtless drone that he was, i can appreciate just HOW MUCH character development has happened while he’s been around, which.... i suppose, is a sort of nod to his entire existence ???

anyway, 9/10, and a big ol shrug

but yeah. seeing john be kind and understanding was amazing (and completely changes how i’m gonna write him in my fics in the future, since he’s probably gonna be in the fic instead of just mentioned) and having him say he’s proud of dean and he loves him was just a super nice treat c:

sam being emotional is the best, too. sam confronting his feelings 10/10

i just. i want aaaaaall of this. but with cas. i really want that. so goddamn much. ;~;