#if anyone dares to try tell me i'm wrong i'm going to explode

[ew01z]

WAIT.

klavier gavin has a tramp stamp pass it on

[fallinforerling]

can we get a 13 and 16 angst to fluff with jude please x

in the wrong - jb

A/N: screaming, crying, throwing up. this one has a bit of a double POV that jumps from jude’s to reader’s. i love to write little angst to fluff thingies, especially with jude. send your request! remember that feedback it’s always welcomed. love you xx

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s taglist 

ೃ⁀➷ jude’s masterlist

ೃ⁀➷ masterlist

: ̗̀➛ requested phrases

13. “why are you calling me? it's two a.m.”

16. “i'm angry but i still love you”

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

You couldn’t believe your eyes. Was this a sick joke or something? 

Your eyes followed the movements of Sasha, the “friend” that crashed from time to time on your reunions, always cheeky and happy to be there. But you knew better. She was into Jude; it was very evident, but your boyfriend didn’t seem to agree with you. Every time you brought up the way she would always find an excuse to be near him, whisper into his ear, or just touch him for no apparent reason, he would say you were seeing things, that there was nothing to worry about. That you were crazy. And, of course, she didn’t care that you, his girlfriend, were there to witness it all. 

You were furious. 

“Babe?” You called, wanting to get Jude to your side as fast as possible before Sasha could get her hands on his chest or something like that. “Can you come here for a second?” 

Jude knows you. He noticed the way you were avoiding any type of chatter, with arms crossed and no sight of even a tiny smile on your face. You were mad, that was evident. But he chose to ignore it since it happened every time Sasha was around. He didn’t get it. Yeah, maybe you didn’t like her as much, but he wasn’t going to avoid her just because of that. 

“What’s up?” He seemed a bit apprehensive, since your eyes were sparkling the kind of way they always did when your blood was boiling.

“Can we head home? I’m tired.” 

“Now?” He turned back to see all his friends still chatting and drinking. “Can we stay a bit longer? The night’s just starting, babe.” 

You took a deep breath, not wanting to seem like a difficult person. But God, you just wanted to leave. 

“Is it because of Sasha? Babe, come on. She’s just friendly, we’ve been over this before.” 

Oh?

“Friendly?” That word alone made you forget about being easy. He brought it up. “Jude, she flirts with you all the time. You can’t tell me you don’t notice it!” Your eyes went directly to her, who was on the other corner, looking at both of you with a tiny smirk, like she was enjoying the effect she had on you. “She’s waiting for the right opportunity to make a move. And yes, I don’t tolerate her. So, can we please go?” 

He stood there, looking at you with a frown for a few seconds before sighing. 

“I don’t see it because there’s nothing to see. She’s a friend, and if you want to leave just because you can’t stand a person, then you’re free to leave…” He regretted saying that as soon as it came out of his mouth, but it was too late. You were already doing that thing with your mouth when you were about to explode.

Your whole face went from angry to serious, obviously offended. He just basically kicked you out of the party, choosing a practical stranger who loved to flirt with him over you? 

“Oh! So I am the problem… Okay, fine.” You turned, and before he could say anything to make you stay, you were out the house. 

He was dumbfounded. He didn’t expected that reaction, since you were the calmest person to ever exist. He followed outside, trying to catch you, but the only thing he saw were your car’s lights before it hit the curve. 

Fuck. 

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

As soon as you were inside your car, you muted your phone. There was no way in hell you were answering anyone’s texts right now, especially not Jude’s. 

How dare he? Implying that you were not only imagining things, but also telling you to just leave if you weren’t happy around Sasha. He was the biggest asshole in the whole world. You hated crying, but it was impossible not to when you thought about it all. Why did he act like he didn’t get it? How many times did you reassured him when he felt insecure? Why wasn’t he doing the same for you? 

A slight sob escaped your mouth, and you felt grateful that at least you were near home. Crying while driving was a bad combination. Biting your lip, you speeded a bit more, wanting to get out of the car as soon as possible. All you could think about was that your boyfriend didn’t even care. 

When you finally made it inside, you weren’t letting yourself just fall into bed and cry yourself to sleep, even though that was all that you wanted. That was out of the question. So you headed to the bathroom, taking all your accessories and clothes off while walking. 

“Fucking prick.” You murmured, throwing a high heel against the floor without actual force, just wanting to let some of the anger out. 

You just couldn’t get your head around how the night ended. He was such an…

“Stop! Stop thinking about him, it’s not worth it.”

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Jude was growing more and more worried as the minutes passed. He tried calling and texting, but you weren’t picking up your phone. It’s been almost an hour, and even if he tried to, there was no actual way of getting a car to take him to your place immediately. He had to wait at least another thirty minutes, which was hell. He deserved to be left behind after what he said to you, but he couldn’t stand not knowing where you were and if you were okay. 

“Please pick up, please, please.” He murmured like a prayer, pacing back and forth. “I’m such a prick…” It was the twentieth call he made just this past ten minutes, and you were still not picking up.

When he was about to make attempt number twenty one, the door to the backyard opened. Jude turned a bit, just in time to see Sasha’s grin while approaching him. He didn’t have time for this. 

“What’s wrong, Jude? Your little girlfriend abandoned you, didn’t she?” Jude stared at her with an arched eyebrow, not feeling the little joking tone she was using while referring to you. “Ah, come on! Don’t let her ruin your night, we can still have fun…” One of her hands brushed against his arm, making him slightly uncomfortable with the way her eyes were looking at him. 

Why was she staring at him like that…? Oh…

“Yeah, no… That’s not happening.” He made the space between them wider, still holding the phone to his ear. The realization that what you said was absolutely true hit him like a truck. Yeah, he was the fucking prick. “I don’t know what told you I’d ever cheat on my girl, but whatever it was, nonexistent. Now, excuse me, but I have to get to her house before she thinks I’ll ever waste my time on you or anyone else.” 

Sasha stood there, with an open mouth and an offended expression for a long time, even after Jude left her all alone in the backyard. Just as he was about to leave the house, his phone rang. His heart made a little twist, hopeful about you calling him back, but what he saw was the best second option of the night. Thank God.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

It was around two a.m. when your phone started to ring. You groaned, regretting unmuting it at the last minute. Why did it had to rang just when you were finally falling asleep? Your eyelids felt so heavy that you could barely see the phone screen as you answered, already knowing that it might be Jude. 

“Hello?” 

“Are you home?” Jude’s voice was a bit agitated. 

Your eyebrows furrowed, annoyed by the interruption and a little bit by his voice. 

“Where else would I be, Jude?” You paused, checking the time. “Besides, why are you calling me? It’s two a.m.” 

“Because there’s no way I’ll go to bed knowing my girl is mad at me.” He sighed. “You were right, as always… Can you open the door? I left my key at home.” 

“What?” That woke you up. 

You got out of bed as fast as you could, going straight to the living room so you could look outside. And yes, there he was, looking up at you, like he was waiting to see you peeking out of that exact window. 

“So?” He shouted, smiling a bit despite the absence of reaction from your side. 

Without a word, you went directly to the door. While opening, you felt your heart a bit heavier on your chest. He came. Once the door was open, you both stared at each other with big eyes; he seemed scared of standing there, and you were feeling a mixture of happiness and desire to punch him in the face. 

“I’m sorry.” Was the first thing that fell out of his lips, making you smirk a bit. “She was, indeed, flirting with me. And I didn’t want you to leave, I don’t know why I said that.” When you didn’t reply, he got closer. “Can I come in?” 

“What do you think?” You didn’t move from the door, still looking at him with a frown. 

“I think you want to punch me in the face.” Despite that statement, he held you by the waist. “I’ll make it up to you.” 

You didn’t know the exact way he was offering to make it up, but you didn’t actually care. Because he was there, and he was saying he was sorry. He did care. 

“Okay, you can come in.” When you gave him enough space to do so, he held you fully, embracing you with his arms until you couldn’t breathe properly. 

“You’re still angry, aren’t you?” 

“Of course I’m angry, Jude… But I still love you… Sadly for me.” The last thing you said was in a joking way, trying to get on his nerves as much as he did a few hours ago. Payback and all that. 

“Hey! Not fair! I’m an idiot, yes… But never stop loving me for that.” His face was buried in your neck, so you could feel the vibrations of his voice and the warmth of his breath on your skin. “Never stop loving me, please.” This time, it sounded a bit like begging. 

You took a deep breath, closing your eyes. 

“Never…” And somehow, yours sounded like begging as well. 

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚*ੈ✩‧₊˚⋆·˚ ༘ *  JUDE’S TAGLIST

@mentalbaddie | @taintedstranger | @mrs-dasilvasantoss | @mbapbaesluvr | @roses-arerosies | @cinderellawithashoe | @yoitsmo07 | @seajjin | @kakuchosbff | @peterparkerbae | @alwaysclassyeagle | @itsjuspenny-blog | @lbsmainblog | @youngjayla | @freetimemachinequeen | @chaeryeongstuff | @lazyreadergirl | @trentismine | @ironmaiden1313 | @wavessmile | @jul1ettt | @daydream-er | @citrusjunosart | @pierre-gasssllyy | @avianawrites | @topguncultleader | @blahhhhhbleeplop | @ricsaigasalec | @koufaxx | @xjval | @444pantheress | @f1lover55

[velvetporcelain]

ma'am? please call me babycakes.

meh. I am present, yet idle. dinner needs to be made soon so I try and shapeshift. what if I am always trying to be something I'm not? cooking, cleaning, mother?

what if I am, in fact, very disciplined? it would make sense why I crave chaos.

I still have thoughts. I still have questions.

but do they matter? I get tired of all the spiritual jargon going around. I cant look at the internet the same. my vision is tainted, which is advantageous. I am always the victor. I think the bad happens so you can see the good. do we choose to see the good or do we stare evil in the eyes? is this what they mean when they say heaven and hell is just a mindset? what you think, you become.

I desire to become nothing. Please do not think of this as a statement of self pity, because it is not. It is a statement of emptiness. an emptiness that allows room for all that moves through me without exploding. there is no room for war.

should you ask a persons permission to love them? what is it about love that makes us feel trapped? loyalty? desire? addiction? instinct? love is free so they say. but they dont tell you what it costs you to get there. to get to that mindset of letting love go. holding on loosely. dare I dream of something obsessive. I really need to be careful for what I ask for. If I keep thinking this way, I will pay attention to every sign that says to do so.

Think about it. Women want to be loved so badly that we want to be kidnapped. Thinking that we are something fucking special. HA. I mean we lose the ability to judge, loves blind much? Woman can bypass this terror because they are convinced that it's role-play, and her life really isn't in danger, until it is. I am walking a fine line. We love being that pretty prey, but only by someone we know?

Why are women so obsessed with true crime? why are women a vessel of suffering----- made to betray herself in order to save man. eve eats apple. sin. sin.sin. blood. blood.blood. betrayal. I cant believe people actually think a menstrual cycle is a curse.

one time. my male German Shepard jumped through a window for my female once.

do humans have the same instincts? are we looking to spend our lives with someone or are we attaching ourselves to security. emotionally. mentally. physically. what if youre with the wrong partner because of that? Or what if life isn't that serious? Settling is what humans are really good at. We've been doing it since the beginning of time. when did we ever become content as a race? it seems nothing is ever really talked about but the collateral damage of the law. What happens when Jesus is no longer our savior? what I mean by that is, when people decide to stop believing that anything could possibly save us from ourselves. is that the rapture? I like to think that language and words meant very different things. What the Bible written in English originally? Who translated this? wouldn't be unfair to say that they could even compare. our vocabulary compared to theirs? the times? the era? the age? the fact that NO ONE WAS FUCKING THERE. lol

you can say anyone is god. I want to know what happens when you take a test group of babies and for their entire developmental lives you don't tell them about religions. I want to know what happens then. WHAT HAPPENS THEN?

I'm still vibing off my morning. I love existing, it's honestly pretty cool and love when the art of being present disguises itself as idle time, "boredom." look what I have done. took a single leap down into an entire universe in my brain. a magician's hat. a very deep, deep black hole of infinite possibility. Infinite magic. maybe that's us getting to the top of the mountain. and we all know how heavy it is on the last mile--- what if boredm is a sign of peak progress? It's telling you it is ready to create and find new things. It- being your mind? why does IT crave? what does it really want. I dont believe it really wants all this malnourished entertainment.

what have we done? it has dimmed our shine as a species. so many people living very different lives all waiting for purpose. all while knowing of our own mortality, which only teaches us how to pursue beauty. animals do not know the their surroundings as far as their concerned it's just another day of survival. I dont think animals live, I think they survive.

if you think about it, that's probably what humans did for awhile too. which brings me to my thoughts on what sort of powers or abilites we have lost along the way. I say humans dont know HOW to think. they just think. and that's all they know. I mean no one really stops to think about it because it just always has happened ever since you can remember. what about thinking intentionally? it is a loop hole in the mind. when you think with intention, it results in action, manifestation.

do you think people can be in love with the idea of something?

maybe I was in love with the idea of being in love.

maybe I'm just delusional making me insane and I'm nothing but empty poetry, and universal sift.

I accept thy will.

-x

[somegirlnamedalicia]

Unfortunately, it doesn't look like I'm getting to the Chip Revvington fight before my procedure tomorrow (nothing major, but it might put me out of commission for a day or two), which means no headcanons for him yet. Sorry to those who have asked! May I offer you a brain boy instead?

Brian (Prethinker) Relationship Headcanons:

Let's be honest, your first encounters with this pretentious Suit are not going to be pleasant. He thinks knows he's smarter than you, and he'll take every opportunity he can to rub that in your face.

Clap back just once with actual facts to back it up, and he will be flabbergasted. How dare you make him look bad like that? You just got lucky; he's still smarter than you in every other way!

Oh, but you keep outsmarting him. And that frustrates him. So of course he keeps coming back, trying to prove his intellectual superiority.

It's strange, though. Even when he's got a leg up on you, he wants to keep going, even if that means he'll lose. And he realizes he's... actually listening to and learning from you?

This isn't right. He must be malfunctioning. Nope, diagnostics are all coming back normal, and none of his wires are crossed. Then what on Earth is wrong with him?

Benjamin ends up being the one to tell him, "You've caught feelings, you daft sod."

"Preposterous! An intellectual like myself could never develop such feelings for the likes of them!"

The next time he sees you, he realizes that, yes, he has developed feelings for the likes of you.

He practically vanishes off the face of Toontown for several days while he tries to calculate the perfect way to confess to you. There are formulae and spreadsheets and everything. But nothing seems right! There are too many variables and ways this could go wrong! What if you reject him because he didn't do this right? Poor guy's a nervous wreck.

If you want to date him within the next calendar year, you'll probably have to be the one to ask him out. Otherwise, he's just going to go around in circles trying to plan the perfect confession until his brain explodes. That or Ben will blab his secret. Brian won't be happy about having his plans ruined, but he will be happy about being with you!

You still get into your little debates when you're together, but it's no longer about proving who's the smartest (okay, maybe it is just a bit, but it's friendly competition). It's more about learning from each other and making each other better.

Now, when Brian brags about being the smartest Cog around, he also brags about dating an equally intelligent person! Anyone who says otherwise shall face his wrath.

His wrath is mostly a lot of yelling and maybe sending in the Desk Jockeys, but it's a nice sentiment!

When it comes to dates, he falls back into that bad habit of overthinking and making himself anxious. He wants every date to be perfect! His brilliant partner deserves the best! He will carefully analyze your interests, likes and dislikes, and personality to create the perfect outing for you! Nothing can go wrong!

Something will probably go wrong because that's just life, and he will frantically scramble to fix it, which will get him more worked up, which will cause more mistakes... You'll probably have to calm him down and show him you're having a good time despite any setbacks.

Even if he doesn't always hit the mark, he's willing to put a lot of time, research, and effort into making you happy. You might have to dial him back just a bit before he thinks too hard and freezes up, though.

[themultifandomgal]

Shelby Clan (Platonic)- Best Friends Wife

The war has been going on far longer than it should have. My husband, Richard, enlisted alongside his best friends, the Shelby brothers. Today they return, I have not received a letter from Richard since he told me the war was nearly over and he would be coming home, so now I wait with Ada and Polly, eager to see my husband and friends.

The train finally stops at the platform and the doors open. Tommy is the first one to exit the train, his brothers and Freddie behind him. I frown not being able to see Richard and begin looking around. Tommy looks at me with sad eyes while taking his hat off . He walks over to me

"YN..." somethings wrong, he better not tell me what I think he's about to 

"No, Tommy don't you say it" I point at him with my finger "he said he was coming home, so don't you dare tell me..." my breathing starts to become irregular and tears start to pool my eyes

"YN..." John now looks at me with sad eyes

"No, no this.. he's not , no" I shake my head frantically until I feel hands on my shoulder. I look up to see Arthur looking down at me

"I'm sorry YN, but he's not coming home. He..."

"Don't say the word, please..." my bottom lip starts to tremble

"He died an honorable death YN" my ears start to go fuzzy and all I can hear is muffled noises. I can't tell is I'm going to pass out, throw up or both. All I remember is that I fall to the ground, but before my knees hit the floor I feel arms around me holding me up.

"Drink your tea love" Polly's voice cuts through the silence

"Like it's going to help" I scoff

"YN it might" Ada tries to help

"So tea will bring my dead husband back will it?" I practically yell at the Shelby family

"Richards dead?" a little voice announces

"Finn" Polly sighs "Finn go play outside. This is grown up talk"

"But YN said..."

"Finn!" Tommy snaps

"I'm sorry YN. I liked Richard" Finn gives me a quick hug and a kiss on the check

"So did I Finn" he then leaves the room

"YN poll is right you need to drink something, you've not drank anything since we got back and you'll get sick" Tommy points out

"How?" I look up at Tommy with tears in my eyes "how did he die? someone shoot him?”

"No, you don't need to know"

"Tommy the last thing I heard from him was that the war was nearly done and he would come home soon. So please I need to know how" I plead

"Tom she does have a right to know" John says sitting next to me at the kitchen table

"Fine" Tommy rubs his face and sits opposite "the war was over, Richard was excited to come home to you, but as we were leaving the trenches there was a bomb that hadn't been disarmed"

"Oh god" my hands automatically go over my mouth

"It exploded, he stayed alive to tell you that he loved you. He told me to tell you to move on"

"No" I shake my head "how am I supposed to move on?" I cry. John takes one of my hands and squeezes it

"Like I did. I still love Martha and I always will. You helped me YN so now it's my turn to help you. Whatever you need"

"We're all here YN to support you" Arthur says trying to smile

"How do I go home to an empty house? we didn't have kids so it's not like I have anyone to care for"

"You can stay here love. As long as you need. Now drink your tea"

That night I sleep in a spare room but I'm shivering from the cold. I decide to get up and go downstairs, but before I manage to get to the staircase Tommy bumps into me

"Can't sleep?" he asks. I shake my head

"Come on" Tommy nods to his bedroom. I follow behind him

"Richard was one of my best friends and I promised him I would take care of you" Tommy hands me a cigarette and lights it for me before lighting himself one "so we're going to sit and talk until your sleepy, then your going to lay down in my bed. If you need me to sit and watch you I will, if you need me to hold you while you cry I will. If you want me to fuck off and sleep downstairs I will. It's up to you"

"Thanks Tommy. You really are a great friend" I take a puff of my cigarette "Margaret lost her husband during the war. She said things get easier. Is that true?"

"I think things get bearable. We all saw things during the war that no man should ever have to see. Soon we all became numb to the feeling of death. I think it's important to feel some pain because YN feeling numb is just as bad"

[startanewdream]

Padfoot & Minnie

Summary: Minerva meets Sirius for the first time after finding out he was innocent all along. (Companion piece for Afternoon tea)

Notes: I may take a time out of writing oneshots for a while because I want to dedicate to another project (I didn't forget any pending ask, I promise! - I'm just really excited with this new idea). But before that, please enjoy this moment that definitely happened between Sirius and Minerva.

It took two Order meetings until Minerva found herself face to face with Sirius Black alone at Grimmauld Place.

She was late for the meeting, having been almost followed by one Ministry employer (they had the right idea that she would stand with Dumbledore, but also the wrong idea that they could follow her), and she ought to enter the meeting room immediately, but she stopped at the sight of Sirius Black standing alone in another room, his arms crossed and looking rather thoughtful.

She took out her raincoat and stood still watching his figure.

Minerva had met other versions of Sirius Black in the past. First, that eleven-year-old boy who was too energetic and couldn't spend a day without plotting something with his best friend - then with his group of friends. Then that teenager who was trying desperately to stand aside from his family and made many mistakes in the process. Then an idealist soldier in a war that he was too young to be fighting.

Then he had been a traitor for years. Then an escaped convict.

And now he was a wrongly convicted innocent that seemed haunted by ghosts past.

The youthful Sirius Black that Minerva once knew was gone, replaced by that taciturn man who would only show a gleam when he was in the company of Remus Lupin or when he would speak of Harry Potter. And even then the light was dimmed in comparison to how bright Minerva had seen that boy in the past.

He turned to her and when their eyes met Minerva knew she couldn't delay this moment anymore. There were things she needed to tell him.

But he talked before she could when Minerva entered the dining room - or what resembled one in a very distant past.

'You got old, Professor'.

Minerva lifted her eyebrow.

'You got thinner'.

'Well, they don't keep a balanced diet in Azkaban. And last year it was mostly rats… did you ever eat one?'

'I beg your pardon?’

'Rats', he repeated, winking at her with so much mischief that for a moment she hoped to hear James' laugh echoing in the room. James always laughed at Sirius' jokes. 'They are actually tasty. Have you ever had one?'

'I most certainly have not'.

'Didn't even chase a little innocent mouse?'

'I know how to control my impulses, Mr. Black'.

'So there are impulses', he said, chuckling. 'I once chased a cat. Lily wasn't happy, but I told her I couldn't help myself'.

Minerva blinked.

'So the rumours were true after all?', she asked, trying not to sound very curious. 'You, Potter and…'

'Yeah, we managed that'. He gave her a lopsided smile. 'How many points would you give us for becoming animagus?'

'You mean awarding minors who took the risk of forever damaging their bodies to turn into unregistered animagi while breaking a few hundred school and wizarding rules?'

'I expected two hundred points at least', Sirius said, unabashed by her comment. 'It was impressive that we did it - and no one ever found out'.

'Turning into animals to hang out with a werewolf. You were out of your minds'.

'We were', Sirius agreed proudly. Minerva fought back a smile; Black and Potter had more talent than sense, and they knew it. They would thrive with the idea of becoming animagus.

'How old were you?'

'We started in Second Year. Accomplished just before the beginning of your Fifth Year'.

'Fifteen', she whispered. 'And it only took you two years?'

'We had a lot of free time', Sirius joked.

Minerva remembered the amount of mischief they caused and the equal amount of detention they got into. It didn't seem they had time - but they certainly had the drive to.

'How did you prepare the potion?'

'Bathroom of our dormitory. James knew a lot of house-elves because of the time he spent in the kitchens and we made them sworn secrecy'.

'And the mandrake?'

'We did it in the summer. A whole month silent. James wrote that his parents thought he was fulfilling a very weird promise. My parents didn't notice'.

Sirius looked around the room and then to the ceiling above with disdain. Minerva remembered talking to a young teenager, so full of anger and confusion; he hated his family so much that he had ran away. He'd promised he would never be like them - and then Minerva had thought Sirius had broken that promise when she saw the news he had betrayed the Potters.

Except they had all been wrong.

'Sirius - I am truly -'

'Don't be, Professor', Sirius said hurriedly. 'I understand why people believed I was the traitor. It was my idea to change the secret keeper without telling anyone after all - it's all my fault'.

He sounded so bitter that her heart broke a little.

'I do not believe it's your fault'.

'James and Lily are dead. If I had kept their secret -'

'You did. There is only one real traitor in this story and it's not you'.

Minerva thought of little Peter Pettigrew, so anxious to be like his friends. For years she thought she had been too hard with him - and now she wasn't sure of anything more.

'Thank you, Professor'.

Minerva hesitated for a few seconds.

'I am not your professor anymore, Sirius'.

'So I get to call you Minnie officially?', he asked, more joyful now.

She fought back a laugh.

'Only if you want to turn into a cactus. But I will allow you to call me Minerva'.

Sirius smiled and for a moment Minerva saw the ghost of the boy he once was.

_______

Remus yawned lazily. The best thing he could say about that meeting was that it was over quickly. Any meeting with the presence of Severus Snape felt heavier; no wonder Sirius had exploded in the first minutes of the meeting and left the room.

Remus knew he should go after him now, calm him down and explain what had been discussed. He hoped Sirius was feeling better, but he doubted it - that house brought too many memories for him.

Before he could go upstairs, he heard noises coming from the dining room opposite the kitchen.

He walked quietly to not wake up that infernal portrait of Sirius' mother and stopped at the door.

'Well', Sirius was saying, a note of joy in his voice that was rare these days. 'I can show you mine if you show me yours'.

'Mr. Black…'

'What happened with Sirius?'

'Maybe you are pushing your limits, Sirius'.

'It's just for a few seconds. I give you my word I won't even try to sniff… anything'.

'You can't be seri… well, you probably are anyway’.

‘Oh, I’m always serious. Think of it as a sort of welcoming gift after years with nothing more than dementors for company’.

There was a short silence, then a sigh. ‘Very well. I will grant your wish, this one time only'.

Remus heard a soft sound, then another heavy one, and then silence.

Curious, Remus pushed the door quietly. He did not know what he expected, but it wasn't this.

There was a familiar black dog lying lazily on the floor of the dusty room, but what surprised him really was the tabby cat above the dog, calmly pressing each of its front paws in the fur in the dog's back, in and out, almost distractedly, as if massaging the dog. Then the cat sat, the body covering its paws and ressembling a bread loaf, and caught sight of Remus; the cat threw him the most stern look he had even seen on a cat, looking almost as if daring him to say anything. Remus would recognize the glass marks around the cat's eyes anywhere even without that severe expression on its face.

On the ground, the dog winked at him.

Remus blinked in answer and closed the door quietly. No one would believe him if he told and in any case, this seemed like a moment between Sirius and Minerva anyway.

He just hoped James was watching this from wherever he was.

________

For reference:

Fonte: Pinterest

[papipopsicle]

AFTERTASTE PART SEVEN

Pairing: Archie Andrews X Reader

Summary: In which two best friends since childhood test whether sex and friendship can co-exist without causing conflict. Including OC's Flick and Cherry, a bisexual and lesbian in a sapphic relationship who are best friends of Y/N.

Song: Dream Boy by Waterparks

Warnings: swearing

Words: 2.1K

MASTERLIST

feedback is always appreciated

Y/F and Y/M Robins were far from perfect parents. Y/F had the mental age of a toddler at times, and being an estate agent who always has to go the extra mile- he often wasn't home when his wife needed him the most. Y/M, on the other end of things, had been a stay at home mum until Y/N turned 16 last summer, and now she helped with all the administrative work for Mayor McCoy. She was a maternal creature which, coupled with her brilliant sarcasm, made for some explosive conversations. The two met on the first day of university and got married a week after the last.

When Y/M first found out she was pregnant with little Y/S Robins, the two realised they wanted a quiet bubble of a town to raise their children and grow up with them. But it wasn't until their second daughter was about to turn seven until they found their forever home in the quaint town of Riverdale. Ten years passing before their eyes, and the picturesque place didn't seen all that anymore.

Jason Blossom's death had nothing to do with the short gunshot sounding over the waves of Sweetwater River, the noise which woke Y/N from her sweet unmemorable dreams every few nights. The summer days rolled into early August without anyone caring, Y/N spending most of them at Cheryl's side listening intently to her past adventures with her brother. Betty threw herself into an internship at a publication house; Flick and Cherry had volunteered at a summer camp, and Archie was helping his dad out more and more with constructions job.

Although it hadn't been the start to the relationship Y/N had hoped for- the nervous giggles and hand holding, short and sweet kisses on late night walks followed by poetry worthy cuddling. There was a magnificent silver lining as Archie's muscles gained definition, and he suited the sweaty builder look far too well.

[INSTAGRAM]

♡ 602 likes

y/n Humph!

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Cheryl busy being my own icon

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"Earth to my gorgeous queen? Y/N/N?" Cheryl quizzed her friend, who currently resided at the poolside of Thornehill Manor. Her mind was off on a glorious tangent about her rendezvous in the kitchen at two in the morning. Fixing herself a glass of water, when Archie slips his hand into her pyjama shorts, his other around her mouth muffling her needy moans.

The red headed beauty shoved her y/h/c friend playfully, warm skin sweaty under her pale touch. Y/N blinked innocently and sent her an apologetic smile, "What?"

"I asked if you've thought about dating anyone else since Clayton?" The fiery ginger girl enquired with her usual upbeat tone.

Cheryl knew she had a unique quality about her which made it almost impossible for Y/N to lie to her face. The y/h/c girl scrunched up her nose, hiding the smile the idea of Archie Andrews brought to her face. 'Yes. We started off as fuck buddies but never actually fucked. Then I drunkenly asked him to be my boyfriend, now a month later I think we may genuinely work out.'

"Maybe." Y/N bit her bottom lip, listening to her friend's squeal as she squeezed her sun tanned arm.

"I knew it! You have this euphoric glow you only get when someone else makes you climax." The redhead affirmed confidently, watching the Robins girl's eyes bug out before hitting her arm, "Y/N/N, you know your secret's safe with me."

"Fine." She sighed and took a sip of her fruity cocktail, "It started off as just fooling around, honestly I just needed to let off some steam after everything. I knew he was into the kinds of things I was, I mean he used to tease me about it non stop. And it was good, so good I stopped being a pussy and asked him to be my boyfriend."

"Holy freaking hell!" The Blossom girl grinned with excitement, "Dare I ask, who is it?"

Y/N deadpanned at her friend, "Guess."

"Please don't tell me it's that muscular oaf Reggie, he's pretty but there's not exactly much going on upstairs." Cheryl tapped her temples and rolled her eyes at the thought.

"Nope."

The ginger thought for a moment, consulting her liquid courage and splashing her feet around the waters edge, "It's Archie."

All it took was a side-eyed glance at the y/h/c girl's blooming rosy cheeks to know she definitely wasn't wrong. Y/N severely lacked the ability to lie, even if her tone held conviction, her features were far too expressive and told the truth all on their own. It's not like they were hiding it from anyone, but the past four weeks had gone far too quickly without any moments to spare for the world around them. They slept together each night, the majority of that time not actually spent sleeping, but they hadn't been given the chance yet to explore more romantic avenues.

"It's fucking Archie Andrews- you're fucking Archie Andrews and don't you dare deny it." Cheryl gawked in her gorgeous white and nude bikini, watching as her friend lay back against the hot marble slabs which encased the large pool with the largest grin adorning her plump lips.

"We haven't had sex yet, so technically you aren't completely correct." Y/N winked but carried on before the girl exploded with a hundred questions and could never be turned off, "Trust me, I want to, and I'm sure he does too. But you know, it's his first time, I want it to be perfect for him."

"Y/N/N, you really love him, don't you?" Cheryl gagged to begin with, but she found it sweet in truth. She wanted someone to hold, who would hold her right back just as tight for no other reason than needing to.

Y/N sat back up and paddled her feet, "You have no idea, Cher."

Arch 🧡

That new post should be illegal

Tiger 💛

Ooo

I like this reaction

Maybe I should post more

Like this one

Cheryl pushed me in the pool

And I may have had a drink

Or three

Arch 🧡

Well that's sexy

I swear nobody looks good like that how on earth

You're a goddess

But also

How's she holding up?

Tiger 💛

🥺😇

Broken

But she's strong yk

You coming over for dinner?

Arch 🧡

Yeah Y/D invited my dad too

Need me to pick you up from Cheryl's?

Tiger 💛

Awe cute we love a bromance, and it's all good my mommas coming now anyways :))

Hours had elapsed far too fast and soon the summer heat simmered into cool waves of wind brushing over sun kissed skin. Cheryl's arms were clasped around the blonde's shoulders in a tight embrace.

"Thank you so much, Y/N/N, I don't know what I'd do without you!" The Blossom girl professed with sparkling eyes and a brilliant smile.

Y/N beamed up at her, fingers carding through her damp y/h/c hair as she looked over her shoulder to see her mum pulling into the driveway, "You don't need to thank me, Cher, friends look after each other. Message me if you need me, okay?"

Cheryl promised she would and the two teen girls hugged goodbye, with Y/N soon heading home- listening to her mother gossip about Hal and Alice's screaming match last night, Y/N loved her inability to keep her mouth shut sometimes.

"Mom," The y/h/c stopped her mid sentence and received a side eyed glance in response, "I need to tell you something and you're totally not allowed to freak out while you're driving."

Y/M's eyes widened and her grip tightened around the steering wheel, her daughters very rarely confided in her. While she knew her youngest was safe in her promiscuity, neither of Y/M Robins' girls ever shared their secrets so for the most part she took finding out into her own hands.

"Honey," The forty four year old's calm tone was hardly comforting to the teenager, "if this is about you and Archie fooling around, your father and I figured that out a long time ago, like so long ago. Who do you think does your laundry? When your underwear starting looking like dental floss, we caught on pretty quickly."

Y/N felt like a deer in headlights, "Mum, what the hell?" Her cheeks heated to an inhuman temperature.

"It's nothing to be embarrassed about, as long as you're being safe and he's-"

"For the second time today, and I can't believe I'm saying this to you, but I am not having sex with Archie Andrews!" Y/N's high pitched voice sounded through the car. It truly was a blessing and a curse to have such open minded parents in situations like this. She thought about telling her mother the truth, but Y/M was a blabber mouth as well as a gossip, so Y/N chose to withhold certain pieces of information.

The Robins matriarch dropped the subject but didn't forget about her daughter's tone, and continued to ramble on about how odd she found Penelope Blossom and the whole Blossom family in general. "Like why on Earth is Rose in a wooden wheelchair? They know it's the twenty first century, right?"

As expected, the Robins household was once again filled with warm laughter and copious amounts of food. The topic of Jason was skimmed over, and Y/S found herself away from the dinner table. The eldest Robins sibling was currently pleading with Alice as she began shoving all of Polly's belongings in the boot of Hal's car. She couldn't comprehend life without her best friend, not after losing Jason. They were meant to be going travelling together for a year- working the worst jobs and staying up all night to watch the sun rise in different countries. But instead, Y/S's eyes were blinded by tears as she screamed down the street at the speeding car, with Polly Cooper taken out of her life indefinitely.

Y/N was oblivious to the dark inner workings of the Cooper clan, Betty's knowledge about her and Archie unbeknownst to the loved up teens. She'd spent every second not occupied by her internship trying to justify the romantic act as a fleeting moment of loneliness fuelled by alcohol. She wrote in her diary ideas on how she could win Archie back over, not knowing it was in fact, too late. Betty found herself hopelessly in love with the boy next door, unfortunately for her, the girl across the road was the only one his mind found.

Archie and Y/N washed up while their parents resided to the living room with three glasses and a bottle of white wine. The short girl turned the tap off after placing the last utensil on the draining board, flicking her sudsy hands at the boy's face. "What the-"

She didn't give him a chance to finish that thought, jumping up and wrapping her legs around his torso- planting a kiss onto his lips, then cheeks, then forehead. The two fell entranced by each other, planting pecks across nape of her neck and top of his head.

"Son," Fred's voice called out from the next room and the two immediately pulled apart, hearts beating in their ears, "we're going in a minute."

"Alright." He replied, placing his girlfriend on the floor once more.

"I wish you'd stay." Y/N pouted childishly, she meant the words entirely but hated feeling overbearing. Her life had been turned upside down this summer, it started off with her unable to fall asleep with another person next to her- now Archie's chest was her most comfortable pillow and is arms were the warmest blanket.

"Tomorrow night instead, Princess? I promised my dad I'd spend more time with him before senior year." The boy reasoned, holding her close and unknowingly feeling the exact same way, he adored holding her by her waist and pulling her close under the duvet.

"Monopoly night at yours?" She grinned and he nodded back in reply, the two sharing a final kiss in the kitchen before walking into the hallway.

Y/N felt at ease as she wished the two a goodnight and headed up to bed. She took off her tea dress and replaced it with Archie's bulldog t-shirt, managing to reach the same length on her thighs as her dress did.

Arch 🧡

I can still smell your perfume on my sheets

Tiger 💛

Marking my territory obviously x

Arch 🧡

I love it

Hope you sleep well baby x

Tiger 💛

Call me that tomorrow and we won't be sleeping so you better rest up tonight x

Arch 🧡

Whatever you say, baby x

Tiger 💛

Goodnight x

Arch 🧡

Night princess x

part eight?

wanna be tagged? just send in an ask x

[liptonsbabe]

Chains of a family [B.W]

Bill Weasley x Grant! reader

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Summary: Molly thinks that Bill’s and the reader relationship is a mistake so she wants them apart from each other. Bill’s against his mother wishes and he find a way to drag the reader into the Weasley family officialy

Word count: 1.9K

Warnings: none

A/N: Hi! Part 4 of this thing lol. I’m so happy that you guys like this story. It’ll have like 20 chapters or so, i’m still deciding that so yeah, that’s pretty much the thing. Btw, from now on chapters will be more interestings... i hope so lol. Again, english not my mother language. Please let me know if something’s wrong. Aaaaaand if you want to be tagged in the next chapters tell me and i will add you! Enjoy!

Chapter 4: Arguments

The rest of the afternoon passed as normal as the days before your arrival. Arthur Weasley made sure of it. Even if Molly attacked you with her dagger gaze when you and Bill hugged each other after you were done with dessert.

You didn’t know what Mr. Weasley had talked about with his wife while you were taking a shower, however, you noticed the tension rising from their bodies after you sat down at the table next to Bill and saw an annoyance sign on Molly’s lips. Her temple was frowned, reminding you of your own mother's gestures. Those flaming eyes, cleft chin, and pinion lips. Both women contract their features too much when they were upset and in your distress, you knew that they must not be disturbed.

The last thing you wanted was to hurt a marriage as solid as the Weasley's. More than once you heard your mother talk about it with your nanny making a powerful emphasis on how Molly and Arthur were able to carry out their marriage even if their economic conditions were precarious and the war was on their heels. They were an envied couple. Few dared to expand the family as much as they did without money in their pockets and spreading their progeny like a plague. No one was surprised, not even your mother, not when her marriage to Evan Grant was merely for financial advantage. Now Arthur and Molly looked upset, too upset for your understanding and you just hoped they could get along soon.

You weren't sure you deserved the sacrifice Bill's father had made for you, yet a flame of hope lit up in your chest. If Mr. Weasley started to trust you that was a good sign for others to do as well, right?

The afternoon continued as normal, seeing how Bill's plans to distract you from the fervent harassment of his mother was marred by the twins intervention. They had just finished a new product for their store and needed a good taster to certify the quality of their merchandise. It was a bad idea, he told himself, because twins were just a disaster and you didn't know them well enough to deny their good-natured pretensions.

"Be kind!" He yelled at them as Fred and George pulled you into their. Bill exhaled, pleading that his brothers wouldn't bother his girlfriend more than his mother already had.

Before taking you home, he thought about the pros and cons of your stay in the burrow. His conclusion was based on the fact that his entire family welcomed Harry Potter with open arms, so you didn't have to be the exception. He knew the difference in conditions in which his theory developed, yet he put his trust in the good judgment of his family even if the Grants' past left much to be desired. Bill didn't talk much about you with his mother, in fact, your presence at home was the last of his worries, the real problem came at the time of joining the Order of the Phoenix, would you be willing to fight against your relatives even if that mean betraying your own blood? Bill hope you will

Coming downstairs, Bill found his mother storing the leftover food in the fridge while the dishes soaked in the sink. Then he watched her clean each plate with her bare hands, no magic. William knew his anger was real.

"Want some help with that?"

"I'd love to, honey, thank you," his mother answered without looking at him. Bill raised the sleeves of his shirt to his elbows, dipping his hands into the tide of water and bubbles that flew across the kitchen. Molly was silent, drying the dishes and flying them to her place in the display case across the kitchen. Bill cleared his throat doubtfully "It never hurts to help, much less when I have so many things to do before the rest of the Order arrive"

"Don't worry, I'll help you with that too."

"Perfect"

"Mom, can we talk?"

"About what?

"You know what," Bill clicked his tongue, passing her the last plate from the sink to continue with the spoons. "(Y/N)..."

"Your father has scolded me enough about that girl, I don't need you to do it too"

"I wouldn't if you had a little consideration with her."

"More consideration?" Molly asked in a squeak. Bill shook his head. "I'm letting her stay at my home!"

"Our home, mom, ours," he corrected, drying his hands with a cloth. "This house also belongs to my dad, my brothers, and me. It's the burrow, a family property, not a secret club where some people can get in and others cannot."

"You know what I think of her"

"And you know I don't care." Molly looked scandalized at her son. She didn't understand what he had seen in someone like you or what you had given him to come out and defend you as he did "I don't ask you to love her, but at least you have to try...

"Have you ever wondered what will happen when she betrays us?"

"That's not gonna happen"

"You're very sure of that, William"

"I'm convinced, Mom. You don't know her like I do and, you know what? I see that wanting to talk to you was a mistake"

"Moody thinks like me," Molly stopped him when Bill was ready to go upstairs. The woman clung to the railing watching her son standing in the first step out of the kitchen "(Y/N) Grant is a danger to the Order"

"Really? Like Mundungus Fletcher? I beg your pardon, mom, but if there is anyone who represents a latent danger to the Order of the Phoenix, it's him and yet you have assigned him for the mission tonight"

Molly's lips parted and if it weren't for the fact that Bill knew her mother too well, he might think the woman was about to throw herself on the floor in a tantrum. Still, she clenched the bars tightly, her brow furrowed, and the redness on her cheeks washed over her forehead.

"William!" Don't talk to me like that!"

"I wouldn't if you had a little more respect for my girlfriend."

"Don't you understand? I care about you! For all of us!" She snarled angrily. "Having a Riddle in this house..."

"A Grant, mom, (Y/N) is a Grant and that's not the same." Bill descended his steps, approaching her mother, returning that angry look that she had inherited from him. It was a strange sensation. A dyad of emotions between joy and fear where the composed emotion was guilt. He had never exploded that way with his mother, but Molly hadn't behaved that way with anyone either "His grandfather is Lord Voldemort's half-brother and his brothers are all Death Eaters, what does it matter? (Y/N) is not. And when do we judge others by where they come from? If so, we could start with half of us. Being a Weasley is equivalent to being a blood traitor"

"William!"

Molly's face went from fury to shock to fury again. Bill's eyes were twinkling and Molly swore she had never seen any of her children this angry, or worse, this determined.

"What would you have done, Mom?" Bill questioned taking his mother by his arms in an attempt to make him feel her despair. Molly opened her eyes, scared. "When your family tell you not to accept dad? When your brothers object to your engagement, just 'cause the Weasleys have long been considered blood traitors?"

For the first time that day Molly's mind went blank, Bill guessed, rewinding the memories of how difficult it was for the Prewetts to accept the marriage. Bill pleaded silently, but pulled away from her when his mother gave no indication to be a little more respectful with you.

"We aren't like that. We don't separate people by where they come from, we hug them" Bill resumed his way towards the stairs, stopping a couple of steps up, turning to take a look at Molly's stunned figure "As you did with Hermione, Remus and Harry when you and Dad became his godparents after Sirius died. (Y/N) is no different"

"She will turn her back on us when the Order fight the Grants. That moment will come and you know it"

"Don't worry, i'll make sure that doesn't happen"

"She is not part of this family"

"That can be solved very easily," he said and the smile he wore gave her a terrible chill down her spine. "Because I'm going to ask her to be my wife."

Molly's gasp was the only thing Bill heard before climbing the stairs and heading to the twins' room. He always respected his mother a lot and even thinking of opposing to her wishes was inconceivable, but your well-being was something that was involved and Bill couldn't just let her mother control his life at her will. Maybe the mistake he made was not telling his parents the truth about you from the start or, in that case, mentioning that the woman he loved was the fucking niece of the strongest fucking dark wizard of all time.

Bill Weasley rubbed his face as he reached the twins' door. He no longer had to torment himself, it was done and the only thing pending at the moment was to get Harry out of his uncles' house, take him safely to the burrow and find the courage to do what he told his mother he would do.

Would you agree to marry him? He hoped so and if not, he wouldn't pressure you. You were young - even a little younger than him - and it would be understandable if you refused to tie your life to someone else's from one moment to the other. The war progressed every day and if you were going to do it, you would do it as soon as possible.

Loud laughings brought him out of his thoughts to observe you and his brothers sitting on the floor, right in the center of both beds, laughing at each other and touching your faces. From the doorway Bill can't see the full painted room, however George's face showed a rather abstract mural full of bright colors when he felt the presence of his older brother. Fred did the same showing his face in the same situation and then you turned to Bill, still laughing and your face smeared with paint. It seemed the twins had created a paint bomb in millimeter pills, that explode when you put a little bit of pressure. You tried to clean yourself with the sleeve of your sweater but you spread the paint even more. Fred and George laughed and so did Bill.

His heart swelled with love as he saw that at least someone in his family - besides him and his father - had hope in you. God, he may have even cried with happiness.

Bill never understood how a sunshine as beautiful as you was never accepted in your entire life.

Tags:

@purple-vodka-99

@vampirestrawberries

Thanks for the 100 followers!❤

[vdlest]

He won't allow it

Characters:

TFATWS!Bucky Barnes x reader

Summary:

Just when Zemo is about to use you as a pawn to your next plan for your mission in Prague, Bucky decided to remind him that he won't allow anyone to use you. An unexpected confession came after.

Warning:

Swearing

You are with Sam and Bucky in Prague for their mission that has to do with the flag smashers. You and Sam were against Bucky's plan of freeing and using Zemo, but you had no choice but to give it a chance. After all, Bucky is right. Zemo is the person who can be an expert to things that has to do with Hydra.

After Bucky's show last night as a winter soldier, Zemo wants to take it to the next level — he wants to use you to know who the Power Broker is, but the only way to do it is to be dress as a sexy pawn and catch the eye of the men who knows about the whereabouts and information of the Power Broker.

"Let me get this straight," you stared at Zemo who is standing not so far from you, "You want me to flirt with those scumbags and put myself into their lair?" you asked unbelievably.

You, Sam, and Zemo are the ones discussing this matter, while Bucky is still outside "for a walk."

Last night was already a high risk, but you entering the world of one of the most dangerous organization in the world would be higher risk. It's not that you're afraid or scared, you know you can do it, you can pull it off. But one wrong move can put your life in the line, as well as your friends' lives, which is the very last thing you want to happen.

"You used Bucky last night and we all know how it ended," Sam pointed out as he sat down beside you. "We cannot afford to take another risk and fail. The flag smashers are already too much ahead of us and if we continue to let them be ahead of us, a lot of lives will be in danger." he added.

"But if we pulled this off, we will definitely know how to stop the flag smashers," Zemo countered.

You and Sam exchanged glances as Zemo continue to explain his proposition.

"This may be a higher risk than what we did last night, but knowing you, y/n," as Zemo mentioned your name, you take a look at him, "Knowing how you work, you'll definitely pull this off. When I came up with this plan, I immediately thought of you. Steve won't choose you if you are not good."

You immediately stop him, "Don't use Steve to convince me about your questionable plan, Zemo," you glared at him.

But at the back of your mind, you know that you can pull Zemo's plan off. You know in your mind that you can actually help the group to finally put an end to this mission.

"All you have to do is approach this guy," Zemo showed you a printed photo of a guy, "This guy is a regular visitor of the power broker. Once you caught his eye, you made him believe that you're into him, and that he finally showed you information about the power broker, just put this powder..." he took a plastic of unknown powder from his pocket, "...in his drink and he'll fell asleep in no time and that's when we'll enter the picture."

You stared at the photo of the guy and the powder that Zemo handed you. You're very sure that you can do it, but a little part of you is worried about you being alone with a guy that you don't know — a complete stranger.

"That's still a risk, Zemo," Sam said while sitting on the couch behind you, "You want to use y/n as a pawn, which is a very dangerous job. What if this guy do something immoral to her? What action should we take? You're gonna risk her life and most of all, you want him to flirt with a guy he doesn't know at all."

"What?!"

You, Sam, and Zemo turned around and saw Bucky walking towards the three of you. His eyes are mad, staring straight to Zemo. He just came back from his "walk" but you knew that he didn't came from a walk, he actually fixed something and you'll find it out later.

"Enlighten me," Bucky commanded Zemo, "What are you planning this time, huh?"

Zemo explained his plan, but he wasn't finish with his explanation when Bucky grabbed the glass from his hand and threw it on the wall, shattering the glasses into pieces on the floor.

"Bucky!" you exclaimed when you saw what he did.

You're about to go near him, but Sam gave you a tap on your shoulder meaning he'll be the one to go near Bucky and calm him down.

"No, don't go near me, Sam. Don't you ever and dare to stop me," he glared at Sam before he turned his attention back to Zemo, "I agreed to your schemes last night — playing as the winter soldier that I was before. It almost killed me! I hated what I felt last night, remembering the times that I was a killer! But I had no choice because I know it will give us a lead. But I am not and I won't ever gonna allow you to use y/n in your dirty schemes! I won't allow you to use her to enter the lair of demons!" Bucky yelled at Zemo, which surprised you and Sam.

Zemo raised his two hands, surrendering his idea and his plan.

You and Sam exchanged glances but your eyes immediately traveled to Bucky when you felt his eyes staring at you.

You saw in his eyes his deep concern for you, something you've been feeling for quite some time now. You don't understand why he is extra protective of you. You wanted to go near him and tell him that you can do it, but there's a part of you stopping you to do so. You were afraid that he might scold you if you try to convince him that Zemo's plan could be a big help to your mission.

When Sam spoke, you broke your staring contest with Bucky.

"I'll go grab some dinner for us," Sam said then he walked towards Zemo and literally grabbed his collar, "I'll also take this unbelievable guy with me." he said as they make their way out of the room.

As soon as you and Bucky are left in the place you are staying in Prague, he went to the kitchen not so far from where you two are standing.

"What was that?" you asked as you followed him in the kitchen.

He removed his leather jacket and harshly placed it on top of the counter, he just ignored your question, "Want some tea?" he casually asked you as if nothing happened.

You scoffed, "Seriously, Bucky? You're just gonna pretend nothing happened? That you didn't exploded like a time-bomb in front of me, Sam, and especially Zemo?" you asked him.

He continued making a tea as if he's not hearing you.

"You know that I can do it. I can actually pull Zemo's plan off, right?" you asked him then you walked towards him but he is still not minding you, "I can actually flirt with the guy that can actually lead us to the power broker, and after that, we'll get what we want. Mission accomplished!"

"It's not that fucking simple, y/n!" he slammed on the countertop making you jumped in surprise. He turned to face you and you saw how furious he is, "You want me to allow you flirt with that scumbag? You want me to allow that guy to lay his hands and dirty fingers on you? I won't allow it, as long as I am alive, I won't allow it!" he turned around and walked away from you.

But you decided to follow him.

"You won't allow it, why? You know me, Bucky. You know I can do it!" you taunted him.

"Well, I can't fucking watch any guy making a move on you!" he yelled as he face you again, making you stop from following him, "I know you can do it, I believe in you! But I don't have to courage to just sit down and watch any guy touching you!"

You closed your eyes for a second then when you opened it, you asked him again, "Can't you just tell me why?"

"Because I like you!"

He what?

"I like you and I wasn't planning to feel that way for you! But God damn it, I like you!" he snapped.

You slowly understand why he's being so protective of you the whole time you're in this mission, why he wanted to put you out of this mission at the first place. He knew this mission is complicated and can put your life in danger, but since you insisted to be part of it, he had to take every extra precautions he can take just to make you safe. You finally understand why he didn't want to make Zemo's plan to life.

"I'm sorry," he apologized as soon as he realized all the things he said to you, "I'll just go inside the room."

He was about to turn his back on you when you stopped him, "And just like that you're gonna turn your back on me?" you asked him. He stopped from moving as if he's frozen from where he is standing, "You won't even ask me how I feel after your outburst?"

"Y/n, don't make yourself obligated to like me back," he said, almost in a sad tone.

"How can I be obligated to like you back when I already like you the first time I saw you?" you asked him.

He chuckled sarcastically, "How can you like me the first time we saw each other? I was in deep mess back then when we first met. I was inside a killer's body," he was referring to the time when he was still being interrogated by authorities as the winter soldier, "How can you like a killer?"

"I didn't like the killer. I like the person I saw in your heart, the person Steve saw in you, the person I believed in," you sincerely said. You slowly walked towards him and touched his vibranium arm, "But even if you were the killer you were saying, I won't change anything about how I feel for you."

You did not wait for him to say anything, you just pulled him towards you and gave him a hug.

"Thank you for telling me how you really feel for me, Bucky," you said as you put your arms around him.

You soon felt his arms around you, hugging you back.

"They can take everything from me, but not you. I won't allow it," he said, tightening the hug you guys are sharing.

-v.dl

[dizzydancingdreamer]

Steve Rogers, The Man On Fire

Hey y'all, as Pride month draws to a close I would like to post this fic. It's been in my drafts for a month and I finally today found the motivation to finish it. This is special to me for many reasons, one of which being that I'm proudly a part of this community. Some of the anger written in is my own. I think a lot of people will resonate with it. I really hope you all enjoy this and happy Pride Month <3

This was based loosely off a headcannon and once I re-find it I will credit!

Synopsis: Steve is freshly thawed, queer, and pissed | A.k.a. Steve's experience in 21st Century America

Characters: Steve Rogers, Mentions of Bucky Barnes, (loosely a Stucky fic but Steve thinks he's dead here)

Warnings: Angst but not bad, Steve Rogers being volatile and chaotic (we love), poorly written accents (I literally read this with an accent in my head), literally a 2k monologue

Word count: 5.1k

Steve Rogers came out of the ice angry.

No— not angry— Steve Rogers came out of the ice fuckin’ furious.

He came out of the ice with his hands curled into two fists, with his jaw clenched so hard his teeth were liable to snap, and with a bone to pick with every damn reporter and historian and too loud opinion on this side of the Brooklyn Bridge.

He came out simmering— no, erupting— like the serum in his blood couldn’t keep his body from hibernation all those years ago but it sure as hell won’t keep him from setting the entirety of New York on fire now. He’ll burn it all down if he has to and rebuild it the way he remembers it— the way Bucky would have remembered it— and at the end of it all no one— not the bigots or deniers or the homophobes that seem to be the only thing that came with him from the forties— will be able to say that Captain America can’t love whoever he wants.

No one will be able to say that Steve Rogers didn’t love James “Bucky” “the man I’ve loved since twelve years old” Barnes with everything he had and then some.

No one.

So he starts with the museums in Washington— because sure it isn’t New York but where else would a relic like himself belong more?

He still has hope when he enters the building. They didn’t make them like this when he was a kid— they had science fairs in the town hall and culture fairs in the backstreets near the docks but never anything this grand. No tall marble pillars or enough stairs to make him wonder if he would have been able to climb to the top when he was half the size he is now. It’s strange. It’s kind of wonderful. Yeah, the Smithsonian museums make Steve Rogers feel small for the first time in a very long time and that gives him hope.

That hope doesn’t last long, though, because soon he’s wandering through the halls, following the signs that say Captain America: The First Avenger— what the hell is an Avenger? Is that what they’re calling soldiers these days? Now he feels small and old.

Turning the corner is like landing on another planet, one devoted entirely to him. His picture is everywhere he looks, his name is in lights, even his damn uniform has been replicated and presented on a little stage and he hates it. The rage is back, sparking at his fingers— he’s a match and lucky for everyone this building is made of stone because if it wasn’t he’s sure it would be reduced to nothing but ash by now.

It only worsens as he begins reading through the plaques and the paragraphs flashing across screens on the walls— he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to that. The more he reads, though, the more he wonders if the stone is really, truly safe from the fire in his blood. He doesn’t think it is.

He surely isn’t at least— he feels like he’s going to explode. This isn’t him— none of this is him. War hero. Martyr. Golden boy. He has to stop reading that plaque— clearly no one did their research. Clearly no one dug up his medical files— or his police records. Brawls at the pub, disorderly conduct behind Mr. De Luca’s sandwich shop, public nudity at the beach that one time— thank you Bucky for the best night of his god damn life. Golden boy— ha.

Golden nobody with the black eye and broken hand is more like it.

For a moment he thinks he’s fine— he thinks it can’t get worse than this. Then he gets to the early life section and for an even longer moment his tongue tastes like gunpowder.

Steven Grant Rogers grew up in the streets of Brooklyn alongside his friend James Buchanan Barnes—

He can’t bring himself to finish the sentence— not when they already got the most important part wrong. Friend. Friend? No, no, no. No! There are a million words in the english language that Steve could use to describe Bucky and ‘friend’ will never be the first one.

How about best friend?

How about partner in crime?

How about soulmate who loved Steve so much that every night for the past forty-eight days since he woke up in an era that Bucky doesn’t exist in he’s cried himself to sleep with the same cherry cola taste of his ‘friend’ on his tongue.

It’s the final straw— Steve loses it.

“Anyone got a marker?”

The museum is quiet before he speaks but when his voice— steadily rising and taking on that New York headiness that his troops used to jazz him about— cuts through the exhibit— his fuckin’ exhibit— it’s silent. It’s dead, almost as dead as Buck— Nobody dares move a muscle as he rips his ball cap off his head and throws it at the statue of himself. Everyone knows who he is— everyone is going to know who he is so help him god.

“I said—” he tries again— “does anyone have a marker?”

It takes a moment for the people around him to pick their jaws up off the floor and he allows them that moment with a smug grin starting to tug on the corners of his lips. Finally— they’re starting to get it.

He’s not a hero; he’s a supernova of every scrawny, queer kid who’s ever gotten beaten to a pulp for kissing who they want.

Maybe then it’s fitting that the marker— when it’s finally produced and placed in his waiting palm— comes from a teenage girl with a shaved head and a blue, pink, and purple denim jacket and a busted lip. She doesn’t say much— only a mumbled here you go— but her eyes say everything that her words don’t. Give em’ hell, Cap. For the first time since waking up he flashes a genuine grin back— yeah, this one’s for you kid.

Steve wastes no time uncapping the sharpie— he’ll look that one up later— and scratching out the error. The blasphemy to his unholy name. It takes him a little longer to decide what to write in its place. There are a million words, sure, but somehow none of them feel right at this moment. None of them are enough. That’s something he’ll have to come to terms with later, though— how much nothing feels like enough anymore without Bucky.

Finally Steve settles on a word and he scribbles it as neatly as he can given the fact that he hasn’t had to write anything in eighty years. When he takes a step back, feeling alive for the first time since waking up, he beckons over the girl with the shaved head and points to the place where he’s taken it upon himself to correct history.

“Hey kid, why don’t you go ahead and read that outloud for everyone here.”

He allows another moment— this time because she deserves the time it takes for her eyes to light up and the smile to stretch across her bruised mouth.

Steve laughs— a rusted, croaky laugh; another first in forever— when her head whips around, facing him as she loudly proclaims: “It says boyfriend. Steve Rogers grew up in the streets of Brooklyn alongside his boyfriend Bucky Barnes!”

“Damn right I did—” he mutters to the kid before taking a step towards the crowd of gaping mouths. “Did you all hear that? Don’t worry if ya’ didn’t— I’ll say it one more time. Boyfriend. Bucky was my boyfriend and if he was here today he would be my husband. If any of you have a problem with that then feel free to take it up with me. I took on half of Brooklyn for that man and I’ll do it again.”

When no one says anything Steve nods, turning to hand the girl back her marker and to thank her— he may be angry but he hasn’t lost all his manners— but when he looks at her she doesn’t look back. Instead she takes the same step forward that he had, one of her hands balled into a tiny, shaking fist at her side and the other wrapped around a cell phone that’s pointed towards the crowd. He doesn’t understand the mechanics but he thinks she’s recording.

“You hear that?” She parrots the super soldier with a wavering but fierce voice. “Captain America likes men! And none of you can deny it!”

This time it’s his mouth that drops, watching as she shakily turns the camera off and spins back around. Before Steve can say anything, though, she’s talking again, this time hastier, and he can’t help but think that she sounds so much like him. All flushed and scrawny and pissed.

“I’m sorry, I’ll delete the recording if you want but, I jus’ know these bigots are gonna’ try and cover everything up and that would be a fuckin’ shame. I don’t know if you know how many kids need to hear this. I did— and I think they should too. Only if you want, of course.”

He doesn’t answer right away— he can’t. It’s like looking at himself at fifteen. Suddenly he’s back again, his feet hanging in the water as his boyfriend paces behind him, asking if he’s ready to have him look at his knuckles yet. He didn’t get that many good punches in— the scrapes are mostly from the pavement— but Buck always worries too much so it doesn’t matter. The protective idiot.

Steve shakes his head, blinking away the sunset lingering behind his eyes. “Bucky woulda’ loved you, kid.”

The next time he loses it— the next time he turns into more flame than man— is after he saves the city he’s been trying to burn down for three months.

It isn’t long after that day in the museum when Nick Fury decides it would be best for everyone if Steve goes back into the field. Of course, no one really asks him what he wants— they pretty much just shove a new suit into his hands and tell him to get training, Captain— but what else is new?

No one really comments on his outburst besides that either. Can you really call it an outburst when you’re just trying to reclaim the parts of you that have been stolen? Sure, the press gets a hold of the story and, true to what the kid had said, tries to twist it into something more digestible, but no one actually addresses it up with Steve. Apparently when someone saves the world as good as he does no one cares that they kiss men.

Or that they don’t wanna’ to actually save the world anymore.

See, in those three months— between the training and training and even more training that Steve Rogers begrudgingly obliges— he has time to catch up on the world. More importantly, he has time to catch up on what the world thinks of him. He scours a plethora of documentaries, scholarly essays, and whole books of information about his time as Captain America. Well— his time as Captain America when it mattered. In all his scouring he learns one thing: everything written about him is wrong.

It’s all so fuckin’ wrong.

Just why the hell would he want to save a world so bent on destroying who he is?

The Smithsonian exhibition was nothing compared to what’s been written in the eighty years he spent in the ice. Better yet, nothing compared to what hasn’t been written about him. They’ve taken an eraser to every part of his life that doesn’t fit with the golden image that they constructed for him. A.k.a. every part that matters. His relationship, his past, every little thing that made him supposedly perfect for the role he was given. Gone. Erskine told him he was a good man— apparently he was the only one who thought so.

Apparently being a good man isn’t good enough.

They only wanted the perfect soldier. Yeah, well, they had one and they fucked him over too. Don’t even get him started on what they did to Bucky— Steve doesn’t want to think about what Winnifred— Winnie for short— Barnes would do if she saw the history books erasing her baby’s Jewish roots. Or his relationship. It wouldn’t be pretty, that’s for damn sure. If ever there was someone more protective than Bucky it would have been his mother. Not that there’s a damn note about her in anything either though.

Maybe that’s the final straw that does him in this time— watching the place that Mrs. Barnes loved more than almost anything else in the world crumble, while also knowing that the world no longer gives a shit about the two people she loved more.

“Mr. Rogers, this is where you grew up, is it not? Is there anything you would like to say about what took place here in your home city today?”

Maybe he pretends not to hear the last part— maybe he really does only hear up until where the reporter asks him if there is anything he wants to say. He’s been around quite his fair share of explosions; it would make sense that his hearing is a little off. Maybe he just doesn’t care anymore, though.

Scratch that— he definitely doesn’t care anymore.

And why the fuck should he? He does have something to say and propriety be damned he’s going to say it.

Steve stares into the crowd of faceless reporters and flashing cameras with a scowl on his grimey face. Around him stand the other Avengers— his ‘team’. The last time he had a team the historians screwed up the history for every single member. Dugan, Morita, Falsworth, Jones, Dernier, Sawyer, Juniper, Pinkerton. Barnes. All of them were brave men with families and sacrifices and all of them were treated like jokes by ‘reporters’ just like the ones in front of him now. He really doubts there’s a difference between old and new journalism.

The only difference is that now he’s here and this time he’s not going to let them write anything but the damn truth.

“It is—” Steve muses, brushing the sweaty hair from his forehead— “I’m surprised you know that though.”

The reporter cocks his head, clearly confused, and it makes the super soldier’s blood boil. “Come again, sir?”

“I said I’m surprised you know where I was born, kid.” This time when he says the word— kid— it’s derogatory. “Ya’ know, considering how you all seem to know nothing about me otherwise.”

Steve almost smiles at the way the crowd tenses. He actually would if it weren’t for the white hot rage coursing through his veins, mingling with the last of the adrenaline leftover in his system. It gives him an extra kick— not that he needs it. Even when he was just a runt from the wrong side of the tracks he needed nothing more than an offhand comment to raise his fists. Fighting to Steve Rogers has always been intoxicating— the aftershocks of winning the battle just makes it more thrilling now.

Who knew, right?

“Sir I asked—” The reporter sputters and Steve simply holds a hand up, silencing him before he can start again.

“Yeah I know what you asked, alright. You want me to talk about the battle here in New York today and how I am more than happy to have risked my life to save it. But I can’t do that, kid. Because I didn’t save it for you. I didn’t save it for any of you.”

Steve feels his team tense— maybe were it any other time he would stop talking. He would just leave it, let the issue go, because Bucky would tell him too. They aren’t worth it, bruiser, he would say, they aren’t worth your blood. Maybe he would listen to his boyfriend because usually he was right. Bucky was always right. So yeah, maybe he would list—

Who is he kidding; he knows he wouldn’t.

Not then and certainly not now— not when Bucky isn’t here to defend himself against everything Steve has been reading about. That’s exactly why he doesn’t stop talking. Someone has to defend him and who better of a person than him? So, yeah, he keeps going, even when he hears footsteps behind him.

“You wanna’ know who I did save it for? James Barnes, that’s who I saved it for! You see, just around that corner there is a bookstore. Rickley Books. That was my boyfriend's favourite bookstore. You know, the man who gave his life to stop a train in Austria from reaching the enemies? Yeah that was him. That train was filled with supplies. Had it reached their headquarters, who knows if we’d be standing here today. If there would be a New York at all. Not that you would know that. But who cares about that dead sergeant from the 107th, right? There’s plenty just like him.”

Steve shrugs nonchalantly— a move he picked up from the very man he’s speaking about— but he spits his words at the reporters with enough venom to cancel out any peace that the action brings. That’s his own move.

He keeps going. “You know who else I saved it for? His mother. Yeah, his mother Winnie Barnes. Wonderful lady. She used to run a soup kitchen a couple blocks from here. Kept the rift raft like myself from going hungry most nights— I was a brawler, you know.”

A couple of reporters in the crowd laugh at that and Steve flinches, his vision tinting red as he cranes his neck, seeking them out.

“Oh you think that’s funny, do you? You think I’m joking? I’m not. You ever been backed into a corner, son? Had people hurl slurs at you that I can’t even repeat today? Ever been beaten up for loving your best friend? No, I bet you haven’t. You weren’t a queer kid in the thirties. That’s hard— that’s borderline impossible actually. I only made it because of people like Winnie Barnes. That woman was a saint but nobody talks about her either.”

Steve has to take a deep breath, clearing the rasp in his voice that rises as he dwells on the woman he called his second mother for so long. She wasn’t just a saint, she was an angel. He can’t cry here though, not now. Not even as his throat begins to tighten.

“Winnie was the type of lady who didn’t let anyone walk over the little people. She used to sit me down and say Stevie you gotta’ fight for what you want because ain’t nobody gonna’ give it to you. She told me that I shouldn’t have to but that there were going to be people who would try to tear me down just for being me. And she was right— just like her son— because that was the era, you know? But now, here in the twenty-first century, you’re all still trying to tear us down.”

A hand lands on his shoulder, small fingers tugging at where his suit has begun to tear. Natasha Romanoff. He meets her gaze quickly, neck craning to stare down the red head, and in the few seconds their eyes meet it’s like Bucky is next to him. Somehow the blue in her irises catches the falling sun just like his used to. Steve can hear the gruff of his voice in the depths of his mind. Back down, bruiser. The sentiment is echoed across Nat’s face.

Steve shakes her hand off him, turning back to the reporters— don’t they know that he can’t?

“You all say you care about me, huh? That I’m a hero? You know nothing about me— you don’t want to. Before I was a soldier I was a kid. A queer kid. I said that already but let me repeat it. Queer. Did you write that down? None of you certainly did before. That’s how I know that you don’t care— because in an age where being queer is infinitely more accepted you still don’t bother to write it down.”

He pauses for another breath, shutting his eyes against the blinking red lights of the cameras. They’re like little demons, always watching his every move. Recording. Everything’s always recorded these days. Will he ever be used to that? Bucky was the technology guy, not him. Not then and not now.

When Steve picks up again— eyes open and shoulders freshly straight— it’s on a new note— a clear note.

“You don’t care about me— you certainly don’t care about the real heroes of the war because if you did you wouldn’t erase our history. Do you know how much it would have meant to Bucky to see our relationship accepted? The man who died for you? How much it would’ve meant to his mother? You can’t just pick which of our stories and our sacrifices are worthy and which aren't.”

He hasn’t spoken this much since he’s woken up, not all at once at least. Maybe he should have, though— maybe if he had then he wouldn’t feel like ripping the heads off everyone in front of him right now. Call it fight or flight. Call it revenge. Hell, call it whatever you’d like because it doesn’t really matter. Either way he feels like a kid again— again— backed into a corner behind the deli with his fists up and his teeth bared.

He feels feral again.

“So now you just want me to save the world like I did— like Bucky did— all those years ago— or maybe jus’ New York— as if that’s any better— and you don’t even bother to write a proper article about me? Hell, I never even asked for an article, let alone a whole exhibit! I’m just a soldier— and before that I was just a kid. If there’s never another article written about me I’ll be grateful. But now that I’m here, standing in front of you, I’ll say this—”

Just as Steve’s voice is cresting into a shout that would no doubt be heard regardless of whether or not the microphones were in front of him, Natasha tries one more time, her fingers slipping between his.

Her voice is a dull buzz compared to his, only reaching his ears by sheer will. “C’mon Stevie— we gotta’ go now.”

Like before he’s stunned but this time instead of seeing Buck— instead of hearing him in his head— he hears Winnie.

You fought good, honey. You fought good for us. You can rest now.

It’s jarring and it’s not lost on him the handful of awkward seconds that it takes for him to respond. That’s just the effect Winnie had on people though— still has, apparently. Steve shakes his head— I know, mama. But I gotta’ finish this fight.

“No, Nat— I’ve got to say this.” Steve mumbles— voice just beginning to waver despite how hard he clenches his jaw— before sneering at the crowd one last time.

“If I ever read an article from any of you that discredits Bucky Barnes, our relationship, or myself just know that I’ll come for you. I’ll come for this city. Don’t you ever forget who I saved it for. James Barnes, Winnie Barnes, and every queer kid who’s ever felt erased because of people like you. The bigots in the forties couldn’t stop me. The Nazis couldn’t stop me. Not even the Atlantic Ocean could stop me. So don’t think for a second that any of you could either. Have a good day.”

With that Captain America turns, marching off the impromptu stage and beginning the trek back to his apartment. He doesn’t bother looking at his team as he passes them— he can imagine their stunned faces well enough on his own. No doubt he’ll be getting another assignment from Fury soon enough to make up for this ‘outburst’ too. Still, he feels a little bit better. There’s an ache in his shoulder, and one under his ribs too, but he still smiles as he passes Rickman and Sons Books. That must mean something good.

The last time Steve Rogers burns he doesn’t burn the way he’s expecting to— he doesn’t vandalize his own name or blow up at a reporter. No, the third time— the final time— that Steve Rogers burns it’s with nostalgia— and with a damn good cup of coffee in his hand.

“I had no idea this place was even here.” The girl across from Steve muses, tiny hands shifting the steaming cup back and forth.

Her name is Ellie, he learned that back at the museum after asking for a copy of the video she took. He barely knew how to use his phone back then, let alone his email— hell, both still confuse him more often than not— but she had been patient. A little awestruck and a little riled up too but he took it in stride— easily. It’s not hard being nice to the spitting image of him.

“I’m glad I’m good for something other than making the news.” Steve chuckles and this time he means it— there’s no malice or ill intent, only humor. “O’Malley’s ‘s been here longer than I have. Looked a little different then—” he takes a moment to let his eyes wander the old coffee shop and it’s new appliances— a moment to feel his age catch up to him— “but I guess I did too.”

Ellie’s laughter joins in there and it’s strange— strange that he hasn’t laughed with another person in seven, almost eight, months; strange that her laughs sound so much like Bucky’s when they were younger; strange that Bucky isn’t here to hear. Here to laugh, too. Because he would have.

He would have called Steve an old man, would have wrapped his arm around his shoulders, would have asked— no, demanded— that Ellie try the plum cobbler. They always made the best cobbler. Bucky always had the best laugh. All grit and breath and him. Steve feels warm just thinking about it.

“Well thanks for letting me in on the secret, I’ll make sure to guard it carefully.” She even has Bucky’s warm sarcasm.

Maybe it’s not so much like looking in a mirror as it is looking at what he wishes he and his boyfriend could have been back then.

“And thanks for letting me interview you—” Ellie continues, setting the cup down but not before nodding at it, her eyes wide— “wow. You weren’t kidding about the joe, huh? Anyway— thanks for scheduling this. I know you’re probably super busy— and that there are more well established people you could have gone to.”

Steve sets his own mug down too— if he hadn’t there’s a possibility it would be more puddle than porcelain. “Well established means nothin’, kid. Not when you don’t have heart. They’re parasites, all of ‘em. The press couldn’t care less about me.”

Ellie nods, lifting the lid of her laptop. It’s a little bit dented and slathered in stickers, not quite the newest model— he would know, he has the newest one and it’s still sitting in his apartment in the box. Yet another testament to how little the people around him truly know him.

“Welcome to the twenty-first century, can I get you a side of classism with that commercialism?”

Now she sounds like Winnie too.

“Say, has anyone ever told you that you’re funny?”

She shrugs, tilting her head, a lopsided grin glued to her face. “Once or twice— I never know if they mean it or if they just want me to shut up. I never do so I guess we’ll never know.”

Steve sputters out another laugh because; “I guess we’re the same then— never give them a moment, kid. That’s the best advice I can give you.” He pauses— again— he supposes it’s going to be a day of pausing— he supposes it’s about time he pauses— before adding, “Bucky would’ve scolded me for saying that.”

Ellie’s fingers, swift and deft over the machine— Steve hadn’t even seen her begin to type— pause too as her smile softens. “What would he have said instead?”

Her question shouldn’t catch off guard— this is why he asked her to meet him; to finally, properly write his story— their story. Still he pauses— Steve’s empty hands feel hot, his shoulders warm; bare— what would he have said? It doesn’t take long to hear his boyfriend’s voice, not there but somehow loud in his ear all the same.

Just relax— they aren’t worth it. It’s too nice out to care about anything but the water— are you coming in or not? Summer doesn’t last forever, you know?

It’s impossible but Steve can feel the sun on his back and on his ears again, like he’s there— like he’s back, sixteen and on fire. Those were the days where everything made him cold. The days where his skin burned no matter the season but especially in August which was when the ocean was warm enough to swim in. It never stopped him from joining Buck— nothing could have stopped him. His cheeks warm, too, at the thought.

Steve blinks, his own smile— perhaps a little lopsided in it’s own right— shaping over his mouth. “He would have told you to relax— and to try the plum cobbler. It’s fantastic.”

With another giggle— and a reiterated comment— has anyone ever told you you’re funny, Steve?— they fall into a conversation, just a kid and a relic, about life. It’s not an easy conversation— but then again those kinds never are. It’s real, though, and unedited. Unfiltered. Just the way Erskine and Winnie and Bucky would have liked it— the only way Steve wants it. It’s not perfect but, hell, Steve has never been perfect.

He’s never wanted to be.

Maybe Steve doesn’t know everything his boyfriend would say— and maybe he’d be lying if he said he doesn’t blow up once or twice after today— but he can confidently say that he gave Brooklyn a run for her money— twice— and lived to tell the tale. He can say then when it mattered, he burned. That he still burns. That he will until he doesn’t— until he’s extinguished.

But, hey, though Summer doesn’t last forever, not even the Atlantic could extinguish the flame that is Steve Rogers.

That’s what he writes— in Sharpie— on the card he writes to Ellie— the one attached to the computer he knows he’ll never use.

[foxymoxynoona]

Hiii hello. Sorry I didn’t send anything about flux, I wanted to sooo bad but I got covid (this is now my third day of fever☺️), lost a really close relative in the span of like 12 hours and I’m in pain cause I’m about to get my period sooo my concentration is stagnant: level 0🙂. Everything is pretty much hurting like a bitch but don’t worry I read as soon as it came out and OF COURSE I sent it to 🌚 and we started arguing again. (Btw she knows everything because even tho she’s still at the beginning I was tired of not having anyone to vent to so I literally told her every single detail that made me go crazy lol).

Let’s start off by saying I’m like 50% satisfied? Wtf jk? Nothing more to say? Sure? Never took a pill in Ibiza? Alright that’s gonna be a fun conversation, just saying☺️. I swear with this guy it’s like one step forward and 10 steps back. Also jungkook got MAD, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him this angry towards her before. Should I say justified? Eeh I mean he never expressed how he actually felt regarding the Seojoon thing so for him to explode at some point was to be expected. I mean he got mad like at the beginning when the whole Lasagna Gate happened in her apartment but I don’t know, it hits different now.

Also, dr Kim I have a crush on you and the emotional stability you provide. You’re doing god’s work, truly. Even if you make me feel bad for defending Sasha because the rational side of me knows how there is no right or wrong in *most* situations here and everything is on a spectrum buuuut my irrational side is like fuck everything hug Sasha. A week ago we were talking about this in my group chat and I said “I think I empathize this much with her because we share some toxic traits so I try to find justification in her” and my friends (including 🌚) said “you think we’d let you to all the self sabotaging shit Sasha does? Don’t you dare, ESPECIALLY if you’re hooking up with Jeon Jungkook. You’re our key to become millionaires and you think we’d let that go to waste??” So loving and caring, my friends.

By the way I loove the discord channel, that was a great idea. I just need to figure out the time zones so i can text when everyone is awake😵‍💫

🌸

NOooooooooooo! I am so sorry! You have so many terrible things going on at once! I'm so sorry for your lost most of all; hopefully you'll be over the worst of covid soon. 💟💟💟

I hope the Flux drama a mental and emotional distraction when you needed it! Get wrapped up in their drama but rest in your own life 😢

I don't see why you would nee to feel bad about defending Sasha, though! Do you mean overall or in this specific instance?

It's been interesting reading commetns because I think we're all just so primed to be like "ok who was most right" in any situation we read, but I intentionally write really gnarled ones where there isn't usually some villain with an evil plan lol. I think too we were all so excited for Jungkook to finally speak up about some things we know he's been holding onto that we've forgotten he made that choice to not speak up about them in the first place and that doesn't excuse his behavior, even if it explains it. He can't hide his feelings and then when it's a convenient defense, finally let them erupt! Even if that's very human to do haha. Like if my kid kicks his brother, he can't just tell me "but he kicked me first" and I say oh ok, you're good to go then. Or even "he called me a poop head three days ago," "ah, got it baby, take him down then." 🤣

As much as we may want a partner to read our mind and notice when we are hurt, it's not fair to expect that and we need to communicate those things if we expect change. Now there are things they've argued about before that might still be happening, so I'm not saying this is just a wash in Sasha's direction either! That's why I had suggested in some other asks, it's really probably best to take things one at a time rather than trying to balance out some grand summation --not just because there are things on both sides, but because even though the context and cause behind things may be cumalitive, that doesn't mean the resulting actions were the mature/right ones. The mature relationship skill isn't to hold onto those things until you've hurt your partner and then whip them all out to deflect. I don't know that he was consciously doing that, but it's not that different actually than what everyone was mad at Namjoon doing. "Forget about X, she did Y so she's not allowed to be mad about Z."

Anywayyyy this is fun and tangled and I suspect mrelationship conselors would be salivating over this scenario LOL. But I'm glad you have friends who are looking out for you and your relationship with JK, even if it's so they can piggyback on your wealth 😂

I hope you get to feeling better soon and my best warm vibes go out to your family, I hope that isn't lessened by the goofy fic talk in the iddle of this ask.

[funkymbtifiction]

I'm sorry but I have no idea what my enneagram is.

I'm sorry but I'd love if you could guide me ... well, again.

I have no idea what my enneagram is. I can only tell what I'm not.

I used to discuss about possibility of being 9w8 with you. Which seems to make sense for a moment but it still doesn't explain many things. 9-fix is very probable though. The thing is, I've been trying to analyze myself for a while now, by observing my behavior and thinking pattern. [...] I reckon this sounds like, maybe, 6w7 with 8 and 3 fix?

7w8. Lots of "me-related" avoidance, anger, and aggression here. You don't want people to control you, for anyone to limit you from being free, and you react with anger whenever that's threatened. You go too far and get told to tone it down. Those are core 7w8 fears/behaviors. The only other alternative is 8w7, but I see more 7 motivations.

[ifconfusionwasaperson]

Lily fell first

Sometimes i like to think Lily liked James first.

Ao3 link yk bc i have to

Cw; a bit of swearing

First or second year;

She should of hated him, she knew that. They were compete opposites

She was a the nerdy redheaded girl with only 1 friend, she was a traitor to her house because her only friend was a slytherin, she was a muggle born and didn't know anything about The wizard world, and her family was working class.

While he was popolar and cool and rich, he wore the house colors on his cheeks while she often times wished she was in slytherin, everyone seemed to like him, of course they did cause he was so very sweet, and he was a pureblood and apperently everyone in the wizarding world knew his family, and he loved quidditch, she could barely get a broom off The ground.

Severus hated him, James hated Sev. She should hate James Potter just based on that fact alone, but he was never mean to anyone else. And when he flashed his Smile or when he sent a wink her way and she felt butterflies erupt in her stomach. Stupid James Potter with his perfect teeth

In third year it stopped being her stupid little crush. Now it was just embarrasing.

The first time he *tried* to flirt with her, her stomach did backflips and she could feel her cheeks glow red. But then soon it stopped being fun as he continued. The stupid flirting was now everything from compliments to pickup lines to asking for a date to hogsmeade. She'd never felt so embarassed esecially when his stupid friends stood behind him trying not to laugh, or when Severus was beside her and she could feel his anger bubblig up. Her stupid crush was suppost to be her little secret but now. He most of known.

"Lily, do you want to go to hogsmeade with me tomorrow?" James Potter stood before her. This time his friends was not to be seen, and The rest of her classmates was slipping away until it was just the two of them in the hallway. They'd just come from a charms lesson.

"Potter it's not funny anymore okay, you can stop i get it, you know about that but stop"

"Lily what do you men 'about that?'"

"Oh very funny Potter really, don't think i'm gonna say it for your entretainment let's just move on, it's not funny"

"Lily i geniuently don't know what you're talking about, i'm not asking you to hogsmeade as a joke im geniuently asking you"

Yeah sure, she thought. As if Someone like James Potter would like someone like her

"Shove off Potter"

Lily Evans did not hate James Potter. She just hated that he kept tormenting her about her old Crush.

In fourth year he stops asking her out and she feels Great. No more of his joking around no more, no more embarassment. No more feeling guilty whenever she catches herself staring at the boy for a second too long. Finally her crush can be left alone.

That's until fifth year starts. And it starts all over again, The flirting the asking for dates. But she's older now, she doesn't feel the need to be nice to him like she did when she was 13. She's 15 now, and she tells him to fuck off, and she tells him to his face she'd rather marry the squid in the lake. She even starts dating someone else. Yeah fuck you James Potter for being an asshole fuck you for breaking my young heart.

But then sixth year rolls around and so much is happening at once, Suddenly she's friends with not only James but all of the marauders. Slowly she starts to think that maybe James hadn't been taunting her those years. He's so nice and perfect and how would those eyes ever be able to be mean. She's 17 and she asks him about their earlier years.

"James?" It's only the two of them in the common room

"Yeah?" He sitting on the ground in front of the sofa she's sitting on, leaning his back against it.

"Why did start asking me out in third year?" He turned his head to look at her. This was a dangerous subject. To close to all secrets

"What do you mean? Why do you think i started asking you out?" James asks looking at her so sincerly she feels like she might break under his stare

"It came so sudden i thought you had found out about- well i don't know" Her cheeks was red, she didn't dare looking down at James but she knew he was staring at her.

"You though i knew what? -" When he doesn't get a respond and her eyes won't even look down at him he sighs before he continues

"I'm not sure Lily i just, i guess i just looked at you and realised you- well you were so goddamn cool, and you didn't care what anyone said about you and you were beautiful nontheless. So you know thirteen year old James thought he'd have a chance," He was smiling now looking far away", And well me having Sirius Black as a friend didn't help you anything after you rejected me. He said i just had to keep trying because, and I qoute ,,You're the sexiest mf i've ever laid my eyes on Jamie boy and if she can say no to you then she's the problem,, he gave me a weird hug afterwards. Then you said no again and well they all decided my crush on you was their favourite thing to bully me on" He had a nostalic smile on his lips again. She wanted to kiss it.

"I ehm, i thought you were making fun of me"

"Making fun of you? Why" His eyebrows were scrunched together

"Well i had been having this huge crush on you since first year," Lily was pretty sure she heard James breathing in sharply, she could of been wrong though based on all blood running through her ears. ", and then you just out of nowhere started giving me compliments and a random tuesday morning you asked me out, and I had to say no because Snape was right beside me. But then you never stopped and I just assumed you knew and were making fun of me" She looked down embarassed. She already regretted her choices.

"You liked me?" He looked baffelled

"Well yeah" They looked at each other before James started laughing. 

"I can't believe you thought i was making fun of you" He threw his head back into the sofa. She started laughing too

"Well yeah you were this cool looking boy with your friends Who all laughed everytime you asked me out and I was just nerdy little me" 

"They laughed at me because i kept getting rejected" He quite down 

"We're idiots" She said before they burst out laughing again

God if his laugh wasn't the most beautiful thing she'd ever heard

"Yeah we are" His eyes had a glint of mischief in them and she couldn't help but wonder why

"When did you stop liking me James?" Suddenly his features got overtaken with panic 

"well i ehm... Lils" His voice was quiet and unceartain. 

"James?" He looked down embarrased. 

Her heart was Hammering inside her chest. This was dangerous. 

"James" For probably the first time ever his head didn't turn around at the sound of her voice. She lerned forward so her head was on the same level as his hos. She let her hand rest on his jaw 

"James" This time his head turned. His eyes was soft, his cheeks was flustered and his lips slightly parted. She learned forward to greet his lips. He took in another sharo breath. Their lips met and the world exploded into fireworks. Oh how her eleven year old self, who had been staring at James for a whole 30 seconds before answering his greeting when he walked into her train compartment, would be jealous of her now. Just you wait eleven year old Lily, in six years you'll get to kiss him. And it will be nothing like you Imagined. Becasue kissing James Potter is everything she'd ever dream of but it's also like nothing she's Imagined. His lips are soft like she Imagined, he's *trying* to cup he jaw. He's still sitting on the ground so he has to turn his arms around to reaach her. Kissing James Potter is also not at all like in her imagination. In her imagination his kisses are nothing of the ordinary. He kisses just like her exes, she knows nothing else. But kissing James Potter is everything but ordinary. 

"Lily-Lils-Evans" He pulled away from her and she's quickly taken by panic 

"Oh my god i'm sorry James I didn't think-i thought you-" she was rambling

"What? OH No. No no Lily i just, well i was sitting on the ground and I don't know you felt so far away i kinda just wanted to sat myself on the couch you know if we're gonna kiss... Did i make it akward now?" He gave an akward Smile and ran a hand through his hair. Typical James behaviour. He'd managed to sat himself on the sofa. 

"Idiot" The Word was spoken softly without any harsh meaning behind it. 

She smiled before jumping onto him making him fall back against the couch.They were both laughing and kissing at the same time. His arms going around her waist and hers going for his hair. 

"How did it takes us this long Evans?" James was smiling like The love sick idiot he was.

"Shut up we're here now aren't we?"

"Guess we are. Hold on does this mean? Lily Evan do you wanna go out with me?"

"Yeah i do"

It's seventh year. She's 17 now, has been for a while, seventeen means she's an adult in The wizard world. Eighteen is next which means she's an adult in The muggle world. . Her last year on hogwarts. Suddenly the world seems all too big and she feels all to small, but James is with her and if liking the same guy for six years without dating him was a bit pathetic, then she was a bit pathetic. But they were dating now so it was okay. She knew they would be okay. 

[writer-dreams]

Obliviate (Draco Malfoy x Reader)

Hello everybody!!! This was a really popular one-shot from my ao3 account. Personally, I’m not a fan of it but people have been asking me to post it here, so here it is.

Random Fact: This was based on a true story that had happened to one of my friends. She actually asked me to write this so other people could see that they aren't alone in this fight. I was also really hesitant to post this one, though I'm not really sure why....

Prompt: Y/n wants to be seen as perfect by Draco. She pretends she’s happy and even starves herself to be ‘perfect’. In reality, Y/n is suffering. She is tormented in her nightmares and by the scars that line her wrist. She dares not tell Draco because she doesn’t want to be seen as a burden. Every time he notices that she is unhappy, she performs the Obliviate spell on him. What will happen on the day he finds out the truth?

House: You choose

Blood Status: You choose

Warnings: Self Harm (Graphic), Blood, Abusive Parents, Depressive thoughts, Eating Disorder (Starving yourself), Angst?

Note: Angst? In my opinion, this one-shot kinda sucks. The reader in this story is female / uses female pronouns.

Word Count: 3,151 words

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3rd Person POV

“Obliviate.” Y/n whispered, watching the wispy white spell shoot out from her wand and land onto Draco’s temple. The wisps then faded away and disappeared like some sort of apparition. She stepped back and looked up at Draco. His stormy grey eyes were clouded and unfocused due to having the memory charm performed on him. After a few moments had passed, his eyes cleared back up and he looked at her in surprise.

“Y/n? Love, what are we doing here? Last time I checked, we were…” He trailed off. His face scrunched up in confusion. “…I can’t seem to remember.”

Y/n smiled sweetly at him. “We were just about to go to the Astronomy Tower, remember?”

“Uhm…yes? Right! Let’s go to the Astronomy Tower!” Draco said, giving Y/n a light kiss on the cheek. She giggled as he took her by the hand and dragged her off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/n knew this was wrong. She knew she shouldn’t be erasing her boyfriend’s memories. This was better for their relationship though. She should be the supportive girlfriend, the shoulder that Draco can cry on. She shouldn’t be the one with issues. She didn’t want to seem like the girlfriend who had tons of problems. She wanted to be perfect. The perfect girlfriend. For Draco.

She stood on the balcony of the Astronomy Tower, marveling at the beautiful sight of the landscape and Hogwarts. She sighed deeply, causing Draco to look over.

“Penny for your thoughts?” He asked.

“Hmm?”

“I know that face. Something is bothering you.”

“If you want to know, its going to take more than a penny to find out.” Y/n joked.

“Y/n, I love you. You know I’d pay any amount to know what’s making you unhappy.” Draco said, gently taking her hands into his. He pressed feather-like kisses against each knuckle.

“Nothing is bothering me. Don’t worry about it.” Y/n reassured.

Draco looked unconvinced but nodded anyway, seeing that she wouldn’t tell him anyway if he said anything else.

“If you say so. Come on, Love, it’s almost time for dinner.” He smiled a little, dragging her by the hand and towards the Mess Hall.

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Y/n stared at the empty plate before her. She couldn’t bring herself to eat. I’m fat anyway, this will help me. I need to be perfect for Draco. She noticed Draco sneaking glances at her worriedly. Ever since the Astronomy Tower, Y/n could tell that Draco was suspicious of something being wrong.

“I don’t want him to worry about me. He’s got his own problems.” She thought, shaking her head.

“Y/n, can I talk to you?” Draco asked, though his eyes told her that he would not accept ‘no’ for an answer. She sighed and nodded, following Draco out of the Mess Hall and into an empty corridor.

He then turned around and grabbed her shoulders gently. His grey orbs stared sternly into her (e/c) eyes. A serious frown was set on his face and Y/n knew he was upset.

“Y/n…” His voice was laced with concern, “Tell me what’s wrong, please. You’ve been like this since the Astronomy Tower and you haven’t even been bothered to eat anything. Whatever this is, its clearly hindering you from being happy and I want to help. I love you so much, and it hurts me to see you sad. Please…just tell me.”

Y/n sighed and she knew what she had to do. Draco was beginning to worry about her, and that meant she was becoming a burden. She quietly snuck out her wand from her pocket.

“Draco….you know I love you right?” She asked, tears starting to form in her eyes.

“Yes…of course I do. I love you too. So much. More than anything.”

“Then you’ll understand why I have to do this.” Y/n sobbed uncontrollably, she could no longer hold back her tears.

“Wait wha-“

“Obliviate.” Y/n said as she whipped out her wand and casted the memory charm on him. Once again, the jet of faded white light streamed from her wand and landed on Draco. His worried expression fell into a blank one and his eyes went unfocused again. Y/n searched through his memories, finding that he started worrying about her when they went to the Astronomy tower. She then proceeded to wipe that memory and everything that happened after.

When she was done, she stepped back and furiously wiped away her tears. A few moments passed and the charm did its job as Draco’s eyes lit up again and he shook his head lightly in confusion.

“Wha-What happened? I can’t seem to remember anything.” Draco looked at her quizzically.

“Draco, you were about to take us to the Mess Hall when you just froze and didn’t say anything. You really scared me there.” Y/n lied smoothly. Draco seemed to buy the lie because he took her hand lovingly and lead her back into the Mess Hall.

The two sat back down in front of Pansy and Blaise, seeing that their old seats were taken.

“So, where did you two go?” Blaise asked suggestively.

“Draco just wanted a little break from the noise.” Y/n shrugged. Draco wasn’t even paying any attention, he was too busy talking with Vincent and Gregory.

As it should be. He shouldn’t be worried about me, he should be carefree and not have to think about an unhappy girlfriend.

Y/n smiled at the sight but she still didn’t put anything on her plate. Pansy sighed and put some food on Y/n’s plate.

“I swear you’re trying to starve yourself sometimes.” She muttered.

Y/n didn’t say anything and slowly moved to stab the vegetables with her fork, making it seem like she was going to eat. Pansy and Blaise nodded in approval and turned away to listen in on Draco’s conversation, but they didn’t see how Y/n threw the food under the table when they looked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You stupid girl! How dare you disobey your father?! You know you’re not allowed to talk back!” Y/n’s father screamed, raising his hand.

Y/n cowered in the corner, afraid for her life. All she wanted was to send a letter to Draco…but her father caught her. He angrily reminded her that she wasn’t suppose to be out of bed after curfew. In the heat of the moment, she shouted back at him, immediately regretting it when she saw his enraged expression. She looked at her mother for help but she only saw her mother’s cold eyes staring at her as if saying ‘Don’t look at me, you deserve this.’

“You’re nobody! Nothing! You’re an absolute disappointment to this family! You’ll never be good enough for anyone because you’ll only ever be a burden!” Her father spat.

She screamed as her father’s hand struck her cheek. Pain exploded in her right cheek and tears rushed down her face. She gingerly held her cheek and furiously tried to stop the tears, her father would only be more furious if he saw her crying. He grabbed his belt from his waist and raised it. Y/n screamed again as the belt was whipped at her. She cried for somebody, anybody, to take her away from this hell but, of course, nobody came. This wasn’t some sort of fairy tale where the prince came to save the princess from a horrible situation. No….this was real life. No prince was coming to save her…..Draco couldn’t help her….. The belt was raised again and the buckle came rushing towards her…..

Y/n awoke suddenly, holding in the urge to scream when she noticed she was in her dorm room. She looked beside her and saw Draco sleeping next to her, his arms draped lightly around her and soft snores escaping his mouth. Y/n tried to smile at the sight, but the memory of her dream didn’t allow her to. Her vision blurred as she recalled that belt and her angry parents. She remembered the pain, the abuse and the hurt she had suffered. Even when her father couldn’t reach her physically now, he still haunted her in her dreams. Y/n suddenly found that she couldn’t breathe properly as silent sobs racked her body. Her thoughts became muddled and she couldn’t think straight. All she could see was that belt and her father’s fiery eyes. Y/n couldn’t take it.

The girl looked over at Draco sleeping peacefully. He didn’t seem like he was going to wake up anytime soon. She slipped out from his comforting arms and crept to the bathroom. Y/n slowly closed the door and pulled out her wand.

“Lumos.” She spoke softly as a low light shot out of the tip of her wand. Y/n then looked at her reflection in the bathroom mirror.

Most people would have seen a broken and traumatised girl in the reflection. They would see her tear-stained cheeks, her bloodshot eyes, her messy hair that closely resembled a rat’s nest, and her shaking body. Y/n however, looked in the mirror and only saw a disappointment. A useless girl. A waste of space. A burden. Y/n could swear that she saw the faint figure of her father standing behind her, whispering that she was nothing in her ear.

“Shut up…shut up! Shut up! Shut up!!! Shutupshutupshutupshutup!!!" Y/n screamed. She punched the mirror with as much force as she could. The glass shattered and large pieces of the mirror pierced her fist. Y/n was left breathing heavily, surrounded by broken shards of glass. Her fist was bleeding but she didn’t care.

“He’s right though….” Y/n thought. “I have to fix this. I can’t let Draco have a disappointment, a burden, a nobody as his girlfriend.”

She reached down and picked up a rather large and pointed shard of glass. The sharp object glinted wickedly in the low bathroom light. The girl exhaled shakily as she thought over what she was about to do. It had to be done. She needed to get these stupid thoughts out of her head. This was the only way she could relieve herself of the pain. Y/n rolled up her sleeve, revealing thousands of old faded scars lined on her wrists. She lightly placed the shard against her wrist, and softly pushed the sharp object into her skin. Beads of bright red blood sprouted from under the glass but Y/n couldn’t bring herself to care. She felt the depressing thoughts leave her head and fill with bliss. It didn’t last long though, the feeling faded quickly and left her yearning for more of that bliss. She lifted the glass piece again and dug it into her wrist, being careful that she didn’t go too deep. Blood was starting to flow from her wrists like a waterfall and pooling on the bathroom floor. Still, Y/n couldn’t stop this. It was like an addiction to the blissful escape each cut gave her, even if it only lasted for a second.

“Y/N?!?!” She heard a voice scream out in horror.

She turned around slowly, desperately hoping it wasn’t who she thought it was. Unfortunately, luck wasn’t on her side as Draco took a step back from the bathroom. His beautiful grey eyes were filled with fear and anguish, his face was much paler than usual and his mouth was opening and closing though no words came out.

Without a second thought, Y/n whipped out her wand. “Stupefy!” She chanted. Draco flew across the room and landed roughly on the bed. Y/n peeked over at Draco, who lay eagle-spread on the bed. He was breathing but he was unconscious. Seeing that he was safe, Y/n noticed the blood that was still dripping from her arms and onto the floor.

“Vulnera Sanentur.” She spoke, pointing her wand at her arm. The wounds immediately started closing and ‘knitting up’, stopping the blood and leaving ugly scars. Y/n then pointed her wand at the blood on the floor, “Scourgify.” The crimson liquid disappeared, leaving the bathroom floor spotless again. Finally, she waved her wand at the shattered mirror, “Reparo.” The pieces of broken glass were lifted off the floor and fit themselves back into the mirror like a puzzle. The cracks between the glass disappeared and the mirror was left looking like it was never broken before. Satisfied, Y/n exited the bathroom to deal with Draco.

She checked Draco for any visible wounds but found none. Tears sprung in her eyes again as she remembered how he got this way.

“Oh Draco…I only want to be perfect for you. As your girlfriend, I should be making it my priority to make you happy. You shouldn’t have to worry about me, you should be concerned only about yourself because I’m the girlfriend that doesn’t have problems. I am the one you can depend on to support you whenever you need it. I shouldn’t need you as a pillar. I refuse to become a burden to you, I’ll prove my father wrong.” Y/n sighed, placing her wand next to Draco’s temple, “Obliviate.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the next few weeks, Draco had been continuously noticing that Y/n was not happy and that something was wrong. However, every time he brought it up, she’d wipe his memory so he would forget he ever saw it.

“Y/n, you’re looking unhealthily skinny. Have you been eating lately?” “Obliviate.”

“Y/n, there are dark bags under your eyes, when was the last time you slept?” “Obliviate.”

“Y/n, your grades are dropping…is there something wrong?” “Obliviate.”

Y/n, however, didn’t count on Pansy and Blaise to notice the change in her. The two noticed how Y/n was constantly tired. They noticed her lifeless eyes. They noticed how skinny she had gotten. They noticed how every time Draco pointed something out, she would take him outside for a few minutes and return with him seemingly forgetting what he had said earlier. The friends were getting suspicious, something wasn’t adding up. So when Y/n was bringing Draco outside after he had remarked that she was looking sad, the two decided to investigate.

They followed the couple out into an empty corridor of the school. They watched as Y/n pulled out her wand and pointed it at Draco.

“Obliviate.” Y/n said.

Pansy’s mouth dropped open in surprise. This is what Y/n was doing?! Wiping his memory?! Blaise was equally shocked but he had no words when Y/n lied to Draco about why they were in the hall. Y/n and Draco turned to go into the Mess Hall and the two quickly hid from their view.

“Zabini. You saw that right?” Pansy asked shakily.

“Of course. Looks like Y/n has been clearing Draco’s memory every time he finds something troubling her.”

“We have to do something. They’re our friends.”

Blaise nodded in agreement and the pair headed back to the Mess Hall, trying to think of a plan.

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The next day, Y/n arrived at the Mess Hall and sat next to Draco, who was conversing with Blaise. Her boyfriend turned around with a wide smile on his face. He embraced her in a tight hug and his arm accidentally lifted her sleeve a bit but Y/n didn’t notice. His smile faltered a bit when he saw the scars that lined his beautiful girlfriend’s arm. He then understood what Blaise was talking about. Even hugging her now, Draco could feel that her frame was much smaller than before. He released Y/n with a frown.

“Can I talk to you, Y/n?” He asked. She nodded and he led her out to a random hallway. He then turned around and gripped her shoulders. He looked up at her with tears in his eyes.

“Why?” Was the only word he could muster.

Immediately, Y/n knew what he was talking about and was about to pull out her wand when he stopped her.

“Please, Love. Don’t wipe my memory. I love you so much. Just tell me why you did this. Why did you go through so much trouble to stop me from seeing that you are suffering?”

“How…?”

“Pansy and Blaise told me what was going on. Now please, answer the question.”

Y/n lowered her head in shame and felt tears fall down her face. “I…I didn’t want to become a burden. My father always told me I was a burden, especially if I told others about my problems. I never wanted you to worry about me. I wanted to make it seem like I was the girlfriend you could depend on to never crack or fall. I just wanted to offer you the freedom of thinking about yourself and not have to wonder if I was feeling depressed or not. Then, I started thinking I wasn’t good enough for you. I started eating less and less everyday until it became routine to only eat a single apple a day. I’m sorry, Draco. All I ever wanted to be was perfect for you.”

Draco was taken aback. This was how she felt? He gently lifted her chin and wiped away her tears. He then pulled her against him into a warm hug.

“Y/n…you will never be a burden to me. Being in a relationship means we can depend on each other, not just one of us. You can always tell me what’s going on because I love you. You’re not weak or a bother if you tell somebody about your problems, you’re strong for being able to identify them, for being able to fight against them by finding trust in someone close to you. You are brave for reaching out for help. You are not a burden, a burden is something that drags people down, and you will never be that to me. You’re just carrying a burden and as your boyfriend, I will help you. As for your appearance, you don’t need to fix yourself. You’re already perfect to me, I wouldn’t want anything to change. I love you Y/n, you mean the world to me. It pains me to see you hurt and I promise I will be there for you whenever you need it. I just need to believe that you trust me enough to tell me what’s bothering you.”

Draco looked down at the sobbing girl in his arms. No, she could never be a burden. He smiled softly and tilted her face up before collided their lips together into a loving kiss. He wrapped his arms tighter around her waist while Y/n flung her arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. There was no lust, only pure, passionate love. Draco wanted to show her that she could also depend on him and that he would always be there for her. Soon enough, the two broke away.

“I’m sorry, Draco. I promise that I’ll go to you if something bothers me. I promise I won’t keep it to myself anymore.”

“I promise to always be there to support you. I love you, Y/n…never forget that.”

“I promise.” Y/n smiled, bringing their lips together again for another kiss.

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Hello everyone! I just wanted to thank all of you for 600+ followers.

I’m sorry if this was triggering or really horrible to read. I am in NO way romanticising abuse, depression, or anorexia. If you are suffering from any of these, please take Draco’s advice and seek help. You can find your country’s suicide hotline here (http://ibpf.org/resource/list-international-suicide-hotlines) or here (https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/) and you can find other helplines here (http://togetherweare-strong.tumblr.com/helpline). If you know any other ones, please inform me. Thank you for reading this story. If you have any requests, feel free to ask. Until next time.

[lladyariall]

So, I just realized a TON in this one flashback.

[Sit down, y'all. This is going to be a bumpy ride ;D before I begin please know this is just my silly opinion in just how I see certain characters. Please enjoy the blog!]

He's mentioned his mom twice, he's shared about his step brother, and Mao Mao brought up his dad in only one episode. Yet, he has mentioned that his mom "says things she would not say" to which I say that he is hinting that he has an abusive past like Mao Mao might have had, but probably worse. Personally, I think poor Badgerclops had a very psychologically abusive mom. He speaks highly about his dad that one time while his mom was.. was really low-key tension going on in the air, if you guys have noticed that. He seems really small in the voice, and he even goes out to try to bring her up in public television. Was he trying to reach out a message to her during "Head Chef" when he was being challenged by Mao Mao?

I think I know why Badgerclops can't take personal critism. He's practically bullied all the time; is the rock to Mao Mao's unstable emotions/heroic thirst for adventure; he's constantly being told he's lazy; fat; and other things.. but to be honest, he IS suffering from all these things that he does try to hint and bring up every once a in a great while that we never get to really hear him out for.

So.. if you all have moms (not trying to offend anybody who may or may not) there is nothing more hurtful than hearing your own mom tell you things about yourself you don't want to hear. I mean, like actual mean things that pertain to feeling absolutely sick to your heart and knowing she shouldn't be saying such mean things to you. I think with the fact that BC has had an eyepatch ever since he was really young changes a lot of things when he was growing up. It seems like no one stood up for him enough either, while Gerald seemed to always win the upper hand to trick an innocent little toddler out of his money. He probably felt like his brother was taking advantage of the fact that he had one eye and no mechanic arm then, so.. poor little guy was probably beat up a lot too.

But here's where it gets darker.

Maybe his mom is responsible for his missing eye, you know? Maybe she's an ex villian, or Badgerclops' family is a gang of badger villains that tried to raise BC their way and it may have resulted in losing his eyeball to gain an eyepatch. He was seriously Adorabat's age when he lost his eye (wait.. are all parents just TERRIBLE in this universe?!) and that type of young mind can be damaged super easily, especially if one flaw about your physical appearance makes everyone judge and become cruel to you; or for instance, someone like our awesome badger here.

Now, let's say it wasn't his mom and Badgerclops just was always ridiculed everywhere he went. Sure he had his reasons to start traveling (probably to get away from his family) alone. He met up with a cyborg gang later which he clearly was probably in tears when he joined, but he couldn't be himself. Not ever in his life could he show his true self til he met Mao Mao, and that's explains why he's so protective of him.

Yet, even Mao Mao and Badgerclops' bond can't tame the larger mammal's inner triggers and insecurities about his whole demeanor when someone speaks out their opinion. If one person said that that awesome hairdo was 'terrible looking' to Badgerclops then I'm pretty damn sure he freaked out, since he didn't wear an eyepatch, AT ALL, and assumed the villagers saw behind his haircut.

Because he clutched his 'missing' eye in sadness.. Mao Mao's flashback, you guys, has a big picture on Badgerclops' mental health just in this few seconds of this screen time.

Mao Mao truly noticed his friend's emotions and decided to just ignore them more than anything 'cause then and now, it seemed like Mao Mao was afraid BC would blow up, and destroy (*cough* murder) every place else in their travels to the point of having to kill him. We're all aware that Mao Mao would probably never have the heart to destroy his closest friend and family he's ever had so he just kept up with his cold distance up til they started to get closer and closer as friends. Mao Mao eventually saw Badgerclops as a big gentle guy but he knows the flaws that he dare not touches.

Mao Mao even showed us how he SAW Badgerclops when he exploded. That's guy eyes changed! Both of them turned blue! That's not normal for Badgerclops! His eyes are blue for a reason in this flashback that either Mao Mao knows and he isn't telling Adorabat, or he's doesn't think about it. The guy murdered a whole village over a hairdo.. wow, um, I'm pretty darn sure Mao is afraid, y'all.

So that can only mean one thing: Badgerclops' biggest flaw is trying to impress people over his personality before they decide to judge him by his looks. That's probably why when the Sweetie Pies first hugged him, he was ecstatic as heck to get more love and physical attention since he doesn't get that much from Mao Mao.

I'm sorry to say that Mao Mao doesn't even know the half of how much pain that has caused his friend to behave in a violent way, once hearing personal critism. Usually, people who are bullied a lot growing up have side effects of deep insecurities that they normally dig up and hide away for a big amount of time; BUT, once they are able to, they will unleash a mountain full of emotions that are unpredictable. I'm not saying everyone gets mad when they hear critism due to bullying. I just think that's BCs' case here.

His brother bullied him, his mom more than likely taunted and created a self conscious bubble for BC, and Mao Mao's neglect isn't helpful either. The fact that we see a new side of Badgerclops being super violent and has a large closet full of sad secrets is pretty sad and mind blowing to watch in this episode. But my favorite part is how much harder Mao Mao tries to show a different side to his relationship with Badgerclops and give him a chance to do as less damage as possible on his man's feelings. I think this one is an episode where we get to see an improvement from episode one and it truly shows.

But I still think Mao Mao was mainly afraid in this episode, which now we can't blame him for. In 'Ultraclops,' Mao Mao ignores Badgerclops' requests and venting to a point throughout their adventures we see. Badgerclops is a helpless little kid inside who just wants to be accepted and not picked at by the ones he encounters. That saying, especially his friends. Mao Mao may be improving but he has a lot more to work on with Badgerclops emotionally and mentally if they are ever going to truly figure out how to heal the wounds; instead of making more of them. I hope they work this out together.

Now I have only one theory about the blue eye colors and that's Badgerclops turning from bad to good. Maybe Mao Mao had such a big change in the ex-villains life that it improved his psychological help. Some people's eyes turn a little brighter once they face less stress in their lives so maybe BCs change in his eye was the one true way to prove it. But then when he gets mad and wants to murder anyone, they turn back blue to prove victory towards the bloody massacre.

That killer is what Mao Mao sees and does not want to kill. So he does ignore Badgerclops' feelings to a point where he still accepts his lover's emotions and for who he is anyway.. sometimes. But now we know how dangerous Badgerclops can be. What do you guys think? Do you think I'm right or wrong? Let me know your opinion too and hopefully I made sense today :)

[rogue-barnes-16]

THE MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCE OF NATASHA ROMANOFF (part V/?)

Summary: after the too convenient disappearance of Natasha Romanoff, the Avengers —a local biker gang— search for help in the most unexpected place in order to get their friend back. Will it help, or will the situation just get more twisted and dangerous?

Pairing: biker!Bucky Barnes x reader

Genre: angst-ish (biker gang au)

Tags:

The mysterious disappearance of Natasha Romanoff: @shirukitsune @retrxbarnes @montypythonsholysnail

Permanent taglist: @notexactlythatgirl @thisismysecrethappyplace @sofreakinmanyfandoms @pizzarollpatrol @bubblycypress87 @1a-girl-has-no-name1 @loislp @lovenaturefirst @dyanna-corona @2ptonpt @goodnightmode @disneyprincessbuffyannesummers @mannls @cutie1365 @catch22inareddress @mybooradley @sebastianisasnack @butifulsoul125 @unlikelygalaxygiver

Warnings: language

A/N: I've been kinda missing for quite a while, posting something here and there, but I kinda miss writing regularly so I'll try come back to posting twice-thrice a week, but you gotta give me a bit to get some shit rearranged and written for that schedule to be possible. Meanwhile, enjoy this part of the series and if you wanna be added to the taglist, send an ask <3.

The mysterious disappearance of Natasha Romanoff masterlist

Rogue-barnes-16 masterlist

I took a deep breath and threw myself against the backrest, waiting for the first location to load while my hands ran through up my face and through my hair.

A yawn escaped my lips as I checked the laptop's clock first, and the timer for the code to do its magic second.

Leaving the laptop over the chair where I had been sitting, I walked my way to the kitchen and poured myself what would be the fourth coffee of that morning.

As soon as I finished, I made my way to the balcony were I used to spend those early mornings with my mug held between my palms.

I took a sip of my coffee, resting my elbows over the small balcony's railing. My were eyes closed as I breathed in the forest morning breeze.

"So much for saying it was a one-night stand." A teasing voice behind me asked, and a grin tugged the corners of my lips. "You still here?"

"It's been two weeks since that." I taunted him, taking a sip. "get over it."

"can't get over you." He dramatically stated in his morning husky voice, which made the sentence seem way more romantic than I thought it was.

"So fucking cheesy." I laughed.

"Bare with me, doll." feeling his lips against my temple made my smile wider while a pair of hands traveled from behind me to rest on my hips. "this is mine." he tugged the hem of his jacket, which I was wearing.

I hummed in response, leaning my back against his chest. "It's chilly out here. I didn't wanna get cold."

He tugged the hem of his jacket eagerly, feathery kisses tracing a path from my shoulder to my neck "come back to bed" I chuckled at his eagerness . " it's still warm."

"I got work to do" I replied noctant with the sole goal of sort-of upsetting him in a playful way. "No time for cuddling."

"Please, Y/n." he whined, slowly pulling me away from the balcony to take me back to the bed. "Just ten minutes."

"It's not gonna be ten minutes." I retorted playfully, turning around to kiss his lips as we entered the bedroom once more. "You're not fooling anyone with those puppy eyes, Barnes."

He let out a subtle laugh "at least you won't get cold."

I shivered.

It was always a little bit too chilly during the morning in that balcony.

I felt the urge to squeal when a jacket was suddenly thrown over my shoulders as a reply to my subtle shiver.

I held it back, though, and instead, grabbed the lapels clothing offered and put it on while a tall figure made its way to my side "Drop the coffee, yunky." Sam teased, resting his elbows over the railing without sparing me more than a subtle glance. "it's like the tenth one I see you with this mornin'."

"It's just the fourth one." I responded, looking before me to avoid eye contact with him as I took a sip of the coffee. "It's nice to see your level of drama hasn't changed at all."

"it's good to see your level of sarcasm is still the same, too." I shook my head with a smirk I couldn't hold back. "I kinda missed that annoying sass."

"Oh boy, ain't I aware of that."

His amused yet brief chuckle preceeded a surprisingly soothing silence between the two of us.

"So" I looked over to him and, by the knowing half smile in his face as he watched me intently, I just knew what he was going to mention. "a boyfriend?"

"Hell no," I denied with a scoff. "we're not talking 'bout that."

"C'mon, Y/n." he whined, turning to face my side. "I won't tell Barnes."

"Sam" I pinched the bridge of my nose as all the bad memories from those last days with them came back around, as if they had been summoned by Bucky’s last name. "I still don't trust you. Any of you."

"Uh... Sorry."

"Like-- I appreciate you tryin" I explained the best way I could. "but we're not there yet, and I don't know if we ever will."

"Yeah I'm-"

I shut my eyes as the self-awareness of how rude I might have sounded hit me. "I'm sorry I-"

"No, no, I'm sorry, you're right." he sighed, rubbing is hands together in an anxious manner. "And... I know it's not my place to ask any of this, but-" he took a split second to measure his words before speaking. "You're happy with him, right?"

I frowned, not at the question itself, but at what was carefully hidden behind it. "what d'ya mean?"

"I mean, you're with him because he makes you happy, right?"

"Wilson, why the fuck would I be with him if he didn't?" I inquired, now turning around to face him as my tone turned more hostile each passing second.

"I shouldn't be sayin' this but-"

"But you're gonna say it anyway." I finished. He opened his mouth a couple of times but nothing came out. "C'mon, what d'ya mean?"

"Listen-" he glanced around before continuing the sentence he had just started. "I'm just sayin I hope it's 'cause you're happy together and not 'cause of Bucky."

We eyeballed each other for a hot second while the anger built up inside me, making it so damn hard for me not to explode.

"Y'know what? I'm not havin' it." I stated, stepping away from the balcony in order to reach the living room.

"That's not an answer."

"You don't fuckin' deserve one." I hissed, grabbing the laptop to finish what was left to do as quickly as I could, now eager to flee out of there.

How dare him? I thought to myself. Who the fuck gave him the right to say shit like that.

The moment I was done with the laptop, I smacked it shut and, picking up my jacket, I rushed downstairs.

I was so inside my thoughts that I ended up bumping into Bucky on my way out, which left us both with barely enough balance to avoid falling down the stairs.

"Shit- sorry."

"Don't worry." he let go of my forearms, which I didn't know he was holding, and I shockingly enough, had to do the same, since I gripped his arms to avoid falling. "You okay?"

"Yeah- I mean..." I puffed, affirming with my head. "I'm fine."

"I..." I stared into his eyes for a moment, watching him trying to read me in order to find out what was wrong. "You sure?" I only nodded as his worried irises observed me. "you finished?"

"Yeah, everything's set in the laptop already." he mumbled an 'alright' and stepped aside, freeing the way for me to exit. "I... I really hope you find her."

"I'll call you if I need your help again." he answered, and, right after, attempted to climb upstairs.

"Bucky wait!" I followed him just to be close enough to be able to grab his hand, which made his whole body tense. "I changed my number." I explained whilst getting a pen out of my pocket to scribble my new number on his palm. "there it goes." I let go of him with a pang of sadness that I wouldn't even admit to myself. "keep me updated." I requested, trying my best to ignore the tinge of red creeping up his neck and ears.

"Okay. Have a good time with your boyfriend." what was meant to be a smile ended up as a pursed lip, and I couldn't blame him since I felt my mouth doing the same gesture as I climbed downstairs to the door.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

BUCKY'S P. O. V.

I double checked Natasha's phone's latest locations, which Y/n had managed to get before leaving, before going back to the map in order to revise which were areas out of New Jersey and Queens.

"Hey" I spun my head to the door frame, against where Sam's side was now resting. "How's it going?"

"Uh... I think we have something." I informed him, pointing at one small area near the center of Manhattan. "I called Carter— I know, Steve's gonna kill me." I stated, anticipating whatever Sam must have thought of saying out loud. "She said Hydra's boys have been seen in this area for a while and--"

"I wasn't asking 'bout Nat." he cut me off, tilting his head to the side slightly while the faintest tinge of worry showed up in his eyes. "I meant-- y'know what I meant."

"What d'ya want me to say?" I questioned with a wannabe-careless shrug. "It's going. Just like it's been goin' for 'bout year already."

I took a peek at his face and I just knew he was about to explain to me how different it had been today from the rest of that year of me drowning in self-pity.

"Don't-"

"She got a boyfriend."

"Yeah, I heard that too." I replied sarcastically, getting up in order to reach for the phone again.

"What I mean-"

"She moved on, I know." I finished his sentence, starting to mark Peggy's number once again. "Can you focus on-"

Sam teared the phone away from me in a swift movement, which left me shocked for a couple of seconds.

"what the hell, Wilson?"

"Don't call Peggy," he warned me, locking the phone and placing it in his pocket. "Steve's gonna end you. And-"

"I swear if it's 'bout-"

"I wasn't gonna say that she moved on, you idiot." he snapped. "I was gonna say, don't do anything fucking stupid."

"What the hell does that mean?"

"It means she's not single." my friend warned me with arms crossed, no longer resting against the door frame. "It means that if somethin' happens and she doesn't stop it-"

"Nothin'll happen," I assured him with a sting of pain in my heart.

He sighed, scratching the back of his neck. "I'm just sayin'..."

"Sam."

"I'm tryna help, man." his reply sounded as a desperate whine. "If you do something stupid and her relationship goes south, the blame's gonna be on you."

"It wouldn't-"

"It will," he argued, lowering the voice before continuing. " 'cause it's easier to blame the ex who fucked her up."

"We're all adults."

"Yeah" he agreed. "but you're my friend and I don't wanna see you bawling and weeping for another year."

"I'll be just fine."