#if I wanted to play it I would've played it already
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i feel so close to you right now
⎇kimi antonelli x gn!reader - he's clingy, but you're not together (oneshot) ⎇author's note: this was such a cute idea but i did it so poorly, wow :( ⎇content warnings: tiny bit suggestive, tiny bit of angst ⎇word count: 1.4k
Kimi's staring again. He's aware that he is, but he can't bring himself to look away. Y/n is laughing over something Ollie had said and Kimi finds himself absolutely entranced by the sight. With a subtle shift, Kimi nudges his knee against Y/n's thigh, the simple touch making his cheeks warm.
Ollie shoots him a look but Kimi ignores it, all too aware of the soft pink flush staining his cheeks. It was no secret in either of the F1 or F2 paddocks that Kimi was absolutely head over heels in love with Y/n, but they seemed totally oblivious to his feelings, always brushing off his compliments and praise with a silly joke or cheerful laugh.
If he wasn't so totally in love with Y/n, he would've moved on by now. But something kept him coming back and staying in love and that was physical affection. You never rejected his physical touch.
"Kimi? You in there?" Y/n says, snapping their fingers in front of his face and jolting him from his thoughts. He startles, looking up with red cheeks. A handful of other drivers and some of the nearby staff members are all trying to hold in their laughs around them, but Y/n gazes at him with concerned eyes. "You okay?"
"Sorry, sorry... Got too into my head. Everything okay?" Kimi says, snatching up Y/n's hand to play with their fingers. A subconscious action, but Y/n hasn't pulled their hand away, so Kimi just carries on, more heat flooding their face at how endearingly domestic he feels right now. Y/n smiles softly and shakes their head.
"No, everything's fine. Just wanted to make sure you were okay. You hardcore zoned out and started basically kneeing my thigh." Y/n chuckles. Kimi pulls back at that, eyes wide.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry." Kimi stammers. Y/n laughs, batting their hand through the air in dismissal.
"Don't worry about it. If I bruise, I bruise. It's really not that big of a deal. Besides, a little marking up from you could never do me wrong." Y/n smirks. They chuckle again before standing up and stretching, their shirt rising to show a strip of their tummy. Kimi stares. Hard. Y/n ruffles his hair and tells him to have fun before walking off.
A second later, his vision is filled by one Ollie Bearman, his face set in a cocky smirk.
"You are so obvious."
Y/n is just about to take a sip of their drink when arms slink around their waist, all too familiar hands settling on their stomach. Kimi. Y/n smiles and tries to peep over their shoulder, but Kimi nuzzles closer, grumbling sleepily against their back.
"Did you just wake up from a nap or something?" Y/n asks. Kimi grumbles again and Y/n smiles fondly, squirming about until they are able to turn and face Kimi. He smiles up at them, arms still around their waist, before he pulls one away to cover his yawn.
"It's too early." Kimi whines.
"It's nearly 3pm, Kimi." Y/n laughs softly, bringing a hand up to soothe through Kimi's rumpled curls. Kimi leans into the touch, a small sigh falling from his mouth. Y/n blushes softly, Kimi's reaction making all too familiar butterflies squirm about in their tummy.
"Too early." Kimi eventually grumbles out, filling the tender silence. Y/n sighs and pulls away softly.
"Well you have work to do, so let's get to it, shall we?" Y/n says, already pulling their phone out to check Kimi's schedule. Kimi huffs and pouts, scrubbing at his eyes before yawning again.
"Coffee first?" Kimi asks. Y/n sighs, immediately acquiescing to his wishes. There was no way they could ever possibly say no to him, not when he looked as adorable as he did like this, all sleepy and misty-eyed.
"Coffee first."
"You should tell them." Ollie says, leaning against the wall and staring down at Kimi. With a deep sigh, Kimi pockets his phone and looks up.
"Tell who what?" Kimi says. Ollie fixes him with a look that has Kimi glaring in response. "Ollie, just tell me."
"Y/n! Tell them you like them, already. This mutual pining is making me sick." Ollie grumbles, pushing off the wall and slumping down into the nearest chair. His knee bumps again Kimi's, prompting Kimi to pull back. He realises what he's done mere seconds later.
"Mutual pining?" Kimi says, trying to distract Ollie from the shift away, but it's too late, a smirk already quickly taking over Ollie's face.
"You normally shift into Y/n's touch, yet you're shifting away from mine. Oh, you really are down bad." Ollie laughs triumphantly. Kimi huffs and roll his eyes, jabbing his trainer-clad toes into Ollie's uncovered shin. "Ow!"
"Deserved." Kimi grumbles. "Now tell me what you meant by mutual pining." Kimi says, fixing Ollie with a stern look. Ollie rolls his eyes before sitting up properly, clasping his hands together, and leaning forward. It's only a bit dramatic.
"Y/n likes you too. They deflect all your compliments and praise because they don't know how to handle it. You really should say something, Kimi!" Ollie says, tone bright and voice chipper. Kimi glares at him again.
"Absolutely not."
"Why not?!" Ollie protests, face a picture of complete and utter shock. Kimi would laugh if he wasn't so tired of people lying to him by saying his feelings are returned. No way in hell that's true.
"Because I'll get rejected." Kimi shrugs.
"No you won't." Ollie says. His eyes are as wide as saucers right now. Kimi goes to turn around when...
"You wouldn't." It's Y/n. Kimi can recognise their voice anywhere, it's wonderful depth and richness practically haunting his dreams each and every night. He stiffens before standing up with a jolt.
"Just remembered something. Gotta go." Kimi runs before he can think about it, ignoring Y/n calling his name behind him. He runs all the way to his driver's room, ignoring the concerns of Mercedes staff, before locking the door behind him.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!"
Y/n thanks the Mercedes staff member, the master key clenched tightly between their fingers. They jam it into the lock on Kimi's driver's room door before turning it. Once the door clicks open, Y/n hands the key back to the staff member and thanks them once more before pushing into the room.
"Kimi." Y/n says, sternness and anger masking the butterflies they feel fluttering in their tummy. Kimi's already staring at them, eyes wide and teary. Y/n sighs, kicking the door shut, before stalking over to the sofa and slumping onto it, nuzzling into Kimi's side.
"H-hey?" Kimi stutters, confused, and Y/n hums softly, tightening their grip on him and pressing even closer.
"Why'd you run?" Y/n murmurs, trying not to let tears mist over their eyes. Kimi tenses at that before relaxing mere seconds later, a soft sniffle sounding out from his body.
"Sorry. I thought for sure you'd reject me." Kimi says. Y/n lifts their head up, pulling away from the awkward side hug. They meet Kimi's gaze and smile softly before leaning in and kissing him without thinking. It's only when Kimi makes a noise against their mouth that they realise what they've done, prompting them to pull away with a soft gasp.
"Sorry. I'm so sorry." Y/n says. They try to pull away, but it's no use. Kimi grabs their face, pulling them back into another kiss. He clambers onto their lap, awkwardly hovering above them as he deepens the kiss, Y/n hands grasping his waist.
The kiss parts with a gasp when Y/n pulls his weight down to settle on their lap properly, leaving Kimi wide-eyed and dazed. He snaps out of it seconds later as soft, panting breaths fill the air. "Don't ever apologise for kissing me ever again."
"Well, in that case," Y/n says, a dangerously flirty smirk lining their face. "Does that mean I can do it again?" Y/n asks. Kimi doesn't respond verbally, instead leaning down to kiss them again, his warm hands lacing around their neck.
When the door opens minutes later, the two can't even bring themselves to part until the familiar drawl of Ollie's voice fills the tiny space.
"Oh fucking finally. They're snogging. Now separate up. We have media to do, Kimi."
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#ᵔᴥᵔ fics#formula 1#f1#kimi antonelli#ka12#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#kimi antonelli x reader#ka12 x reader#formula 1 one shot#f1 one shot#babybearnation
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𝓒𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝓢𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍: 𝓒𝐚𝐭 𝓢𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡
pairing kang sae-byeok x fem!reader | wc: 2k
summary -> a sudden visit to the orphanage from sae-byeok leaves you scared and confused for her while simultaneously being hurt by her words. warnings -> some hurtful words to reader, only because sae-byeok is really guarded. :(
( beneath the quiet masterlist )
11:25AM
You wake to the faint murmur of the morning, the sun shining directly into your eyes through the sliver of curtain that failed to cover your window. You let out a muffled groan, forcing your head further into your pillow to hide yourself from the sun, not yet wanting to drag yourself out of bed and into the well-worn workday routine that you had gotten so tired of. Lifting your hand to cover the side of your face, you feel the weight of your phone still in your hand and without thinking, you unlock it, eyes scanning for a message—her message. A flicker of desperate hope sparks within you, though you hate to admit it. And there it is. A reply.
Kang Sae-Byeok :)
Kang is fine. Only text for emergencies.
Her words are cold, clipped, and impersonal, laced with an intentional distance that cuts deeper than you would've liked to admit. You stare at the screen, equal parts relieved at her response yet frustrated at yourself for wanting more. Why had you expected anything different? Why had you let yourself hope for warmth, for connection? Sighing, you toss your phone aside and lazily kick your legs out of your blanket, trying to direct your focus on preparing for the dreary day ahead.
Rain pelts against the window in steady sheets, matching the slight heaviness in your chest as you languidly get ready, slowly slipping your arms and legs through your clothes with barely any movement to get off of the bed, quietly thanking yourself for taking a shower and washing your hair the night before so you didn’t have to do it that morning.
Running to your car, and the hour and a half long drive to the orphanage went by in a blur. Your movements stuck in auto-pilot as you followed the same footsteps as usual.
Entering the orphanage, you're immediately bombarded by the hyperactive energy soaring through the children. Even when the dark and gloomy weather traps the children indoors, their boundless energy reverberates off the walls. The chaos swirling around you as groups of kids rip and run through the halls, jumping down the steps, hopping over couches, and laughing boisterously. Yet amidst it all, a small familiar figure sits idly. Cheol sits alone, his small frame huddled at the corner of the room, his eyes following the other children as they restlessly run up and down breathlessly, a faint smile on his face.
Concern tugs at you, as you set your things by the front door, leaving your slightly muddy boots outside by the door. You quietly make your way over, dodging scattered toys on the floor, and speedy children. Unfortunately not being able to make it out of the way fast enough, being used as a human shield as two kids ran around you, one of them stopping while the other aimed to shoot with an toy arrow gun, instead of hitting the intended person it bounced off of your stomach. A blank face adorning you as you grabbed the toy from the boy. “Eric, what did I say about shooting things in the house?” you ask sternly, hands placed on your hips as you shoot him a pointed look.
He cowers under your gaze, a quick murmur of a “Sorry.” leaving his lips before the girl behind you started to run, Eric not fully getting his apology out before he started off on his chase again. A sigh left you before you continued your tread over to Cheol who’s eyes had already found yours, his figure perking up when he noticed you making your way towards him.
Slowly you crouch down to meet his gaze, setting the toy gun aside.
“Cheol, is everything okay? Why aren’t you playing with the other kids?” you quietly ask, your head tilting to the side.
He rests his head on his propped up knees with a small huff before speaking, his voice soft yet steady. “I’m just..nervous.”
Something about his timidness strikes a chord deep within you. You gently pout at him before lifting him to stand with you. “Oh, cmon’ they don't bite, I promise. Except maybe Youngseo but only when she’s hungry.” you reply with gentle encouragement. His eyes slightly widen as they trail over to Youngseo who seems to be chewing on the arm of her stuffed animal. He slightly cowers behind you, even as you slowly coax him toward the group, silently urging the other children to include him by asking what game they are playing. Slowly but surely, Cheol steps from behind you, his grip on shirt loosening as a small group of girls and boys wave him over into their circle, and soon enough their laughter fills up the entire room, gentle smiles and giggles escaping them as they talk animatedly, leaving you to smile to yourself as he breaks out of his shell, easing the worries you once felt.
With a small wake up call from Eliana letting out a shrill shriek at Eric, chasing her around with a fake bug an exasperated roll of your eyes happening before you could stop.
With all of the ruckus going on you could barely get a word in, wondering where your mother could be at this time, and more importantly what could she be doing. Instead of screaming at the top of your lungs over multiple kids you resorted to flickering the lights on and off until they calmed down. “Alright, come on. Let’s straighten up. No more running around, you can either play in the play room or watch tv in the living room. One or the other.” you interject, some of the kids let out small groans as they weren’t ready to stop running around.
After your speech you urged the children to help you clean up and run off to their designated areas until lunch time.
Once they were occupied with cleaning, you walked over to your mothers room, knocking on the door before entering. “Sick, again?” you asked, your fingers gesturing over sick when she wasn't looking.
“Ohh, yeah.” she murmured, her eyes trained on her ipad as she lay back in bed with an ice pack pressed to her forehead, most-likely playing solitaire or sudoku. You sighed with a hint of annoyance. “Okay, call if you need anything.” you murmured half-heartedly before shutting the door.
Just as the children started to settle down, the sharp chime of the doorbell pierced through the air. With a resigned sigh, you push off of Mama Kim’s door and head to the front door.
When you swing the door open, the sight that greets you makes you freeze in place: Sae-byeok. She stands there stiffly, her frame slightly shivering as she’s drenched to the bone, her soaked clothes clinging to her like a second skin. Rainwater trails down her face, caressing the fresh wounds on her cheek while dripping from her chin, pooling on the porch below her.
“Come in,” you manage to choke out, your voice wavering between concern and disbelief. You usher her inside, the words tumbling from your mouth in a disorganized flood—”do you need a towel to dry off? I think I might have some spare clothes—oh, my god you're bleeding.”
Even with all of the offers for towels, dry clothes, and concerned questions about her injuries—she does nothing but cut you off with her trademark bluntness, a slam of the door behind her following.
“I’m here to see my brother,” she says, her tone flat and firm. Yet there’s something different about her. Beneath the sharpness of her words lies a faint but unmistakable crack in her composure, a fragile edge you can’t ignore, her gaze slightly wavers at the way you keep glancing over at her in worry. Her shoulders slightly easing before she straightened herself out and furrowed her eyebrows harder, the glimpse of vulnerability disappearing just as soon as it came.
Swallowing the questions that crowded your mind, you simply nod and retrieve Cheol from his new group of friends in the playroom. Worry falling over you as you hesitate to take his hand and lead him down the hall to see his battered and drenched sister. Yet to your surprise the boy’s gaze flits to her battered face, but he shows no surprise, his calm demeanor unsettling. It’s as though this version of her—worn, wounded, yet unyielding—has become a familiar sight. The thought weighs on you in a heavy way, your frown deepening.
“I’ll leave you two alone.” you whispered before turning to leave them alone, Cheol’s voice making you stop in your tracks, his little hand that was gripping yours now gripping hers as he turns to you with a quiet yet pointed question. “Noona, did you thank Miss Kim yet?”
His words catch you off guard as he looks up at Sae-Byeok with wide doe eyes. She bristles at his suggestion, her brows furrowing in discomfort from being put on the spot. She scratches at her temple, her irritation barely veiled, before she quietly mutters out, “Thank you… for helping Cheol when he needed it.” The words are stiff, as if they were dragged out unwillingly from her lips.
You nod, offering a polite, strained smile. “No worries.” you quickly reply, turning around once again to leave before Cheol insists you stay with them. There's clear hesitance in your figure as you're able to read the tension in Sae-byeok’s stance. Cheol’s earnest tugs at you and Sae-Byeok’s sleeve is insistent, making it hard to say ‘No’ to his pleas.
Ignoring the unrelenting glare of Sae-byeok, you hesitantly nod your head, giving him your hand. He quickly grabs onto it, one hand holding yours, the other holding Sae-byeoks as he drags the both of you towards the visitor area.
You choose to sit at a seat across from the two, not wanting to invade too much by getting too close. “Oh, wait! I forgot to get my painting.” he shouts in sudden realization, soon enough Cheol scampers out of his seat to go retrieve it, leaving you and Sae-byeok in the brittle silence of an unspoken conversation. Your eyes flit to the bruises on her knuckles, the fresh cuts on her face.
When she feels the burn of your gaze lingering on her hands, she quickly tucks the evidence of her battered hands out of sight. The gesture only deepening the knot of worry in your chest.
“Miss Kang,” you venture cautiously, “where are you staying?”
Her response is quick and laced with venom. “Out of the way. Just like you should be.”
You blink, stunned. “I—I’m sorry?” you question, your face crestfallen, mirroring your hurt and confusion.
“I don’t need your help or your pity,” she snaps. “I’m here for my brother and that’s it.”
The harshness in her voice cuts deeper than it should, but you manage a nod, fighting to steady your composure. “I wasn’t trying to pity you,” you murmur, biting back the forming lump in your throat. “I just want to help.” you add on, your eyes averting from hers, and falling to your lap, watching as your hands fiddled with the fabric of your cardigan, a nervous habit you had formed in your elementary years.
You clear your throat in your final attempt to grasp at any composure you had left “ If—if you ever need a place to stay, or help at all, you have my number.” you add on, eyes glancing quickly to her before they land on Cheol’s approaching figure.
His wide smile quickly falls at the look on youand Sae-Byeok's faces. Hers serious, almost regretful as her eyes glance back and forth between the table and out of the window, while yours were on him, yet they were glossy with a slight red tint.
“What happened? Did you guys fight?” he asked quietly, his hand holding his painting gently falling to his side. “No, no, Cheol. I—um just have to get back to the other kids. I’ll try to stay a little longer with you guys tomorrow.” you add on quickly, getting up from the seat before giving them a deep bow and excusing yourself.
You can feel her eyes burning into you, but you refuse to turn around and meet her gaze, retreating to the playroom where the children’s laughter rings like a fragile balm to your frayed nerves. Eliana looks up as you enter, her smile tentative and bright, you don’t hesitate to return it, even as the weight of Sae-byeok’s presence still lingers, heavy and unshakable.
' 𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 ' 📷 : @miabcuzz @twicesuuui @kissyslut @kritkalhit @st4rcs @dumbbellxo @theforestchoseme3 @wlvlurvsfimmia @genshinenjoyer @theweirdanimation @ch-3-rry @nenukkjhj @giaqnn @crack240 @pookalicious-hq @laurenkenss @sheinhamood @pooksterrr @bbynai @diorzs @beaaluv @colorfulkittenperfection @yourl0caltrash @kidicaruslover911 @sherryuki-callmeyuki @i0nic02 @knfthxv @mina-has-been-here @monroesturnns
#kang sae byeok x fem!reader#kang saebyeok x fem!reader#kang saebyeok x reader#kang sae byeok x reader#kang saebyeok#kang sae byeok#067 x reader#player 067 x reader#player 067#067#squid game x fem!reader#squid games x reader#squid game imagines#squid game x y/n#squid game
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If Steam doesn't stop recommending Baldur's Gate 3 to me pretty much on the page of every game I check out, I'm going to blow Valve sky high.
I don't give a shit about it... So leave me the fuck alone!!
#fucking Steam and it's fucking recommendation system#fuck off with stupid bsg3#if I wanted to play it I would've played it already#stupid algorithm bullshit
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Can you talk about trans!Curly a little bit more? I'm curios if you have any headcanons and the like
-💀
It's just such a thing in my mind because it adds a truthful sadness and differing aspect to mouthwashing.
If Curly was trans it adds the horror of the horribly selfish thought he could have easily been in Anya's situation. It could've been him but it wasn't and he so conflicted on the pit it put in his stomach that brings and the shameful relief it wasn't. In this scenario he is friends with Jimmy for a long time still. Jimmy likely knew him pretransition. Maybe he gave Curly weird looks then, maybe they never stopped after, maybe they seemed meaner. They are guys now, bros, both of them are. He doesn't really have to worry what those looks mean anymore, Jimmy just has that face with him sometimes. It's recontextualizing a lot of things for him that he was in denial about or too ashamed to admit. How naive he was being and how he let that get another person hurt.
Specifically with Anya, it's he knows the dread and fear she's feeling. He can understand it because he had to live with it for a good portion of his life, he knows it cause he still does, just in a slightly different way. It makes him think of all the times he's been alone with Jimmy, all the times he's been way more drunk off his ass and not remember the night, Jimmy was always with him the next day. Makes him think of the comments he would laugh off both because that's what guys do but because that part of being a girl says to laugh so Jimmy doesn't do something. It's the selfish realization that he was never safe and he's uncertain now too. Mad at himself for forgeting that feeling, espcially since for a long time he would've been considered the only woman on a crew (with all that implies) for a long time.
He should've taken those blinders off, step back into that position for just a moment and it's so much more painful that Anya likely came to him because he should've gotten it. Those thoughts don't leave his mind after the crash when he's in an even more vulnerable position than she was...
#this is less headcanons and more my thoughts of the intersectional horror this brings to mouthwashing which is also a thing it#already has but more directly in the mix vs just the class gender and positional struggle. like the idea he waited to confront Jimmy becaus#he could conceptualize the crime better because of experience with womanhood and also how it would've destroyed him in terms of being trans#like its weird to word as a comparison but thats kinda how empathy works as in an understanding and ability to project through aspects#like you found out your friend who has always had weird feelings about and relating to you is a rapist and got one of your other friend#pregnant and is now being openly hostile and aggressive towards you. You have only a few days to really think on all of this all the years#with him and how many oppurtunites he had that you blame yourself for giving him both in life and to do to you. You are starting to#realize that he may have done what he did to Anya because it was no longer viable with him or because of weird transphobia/homophobia#from Jimmy and god its so much and he should've know better and what did Jimmy do then - c r a s h#he is at such a small amount of mercy to Jimmy now and he can't protect Anya and it's terrifying because i know and you know that Jimmy is#giving him those weird looks again...#like it adds another layer of horror to things and while I don't think Jimmy would do anything to Curly it's heavily implied he targeted he#because of relatively more important position and getting Curly to have doubts about him as a power play and Curly knows Jimmy well enough#that him immediately exerting his authority and power would set him off after already having been mad about it and even when doing#damage control it still set him off. like its the horror of accidenlty siding with your oppresser and hurting other like you only to then b#stabbed in the back again by the person who took advantage of your nature like its so complext but my actual trans curly headcanons#are just a little bit happier like i imagine he was the first on the boys soccer team and a star player. maybe he and jimmy even picked ou#his first offical “boy” clothes and Jimmy picked most so he looked like the grungiest white boy but she was a boy so it didn't matter cause#it was with his friend who accepted him and I bet on the bed he looks back at all those moments and notices the little details that his#friend wasnt actually so happy but he can't be certain when he started looking so bitter or hes just imagining out of paranoia cause he jus#cant know and even if he could he wouldn't want to ask like god thinking about Anya and probably being a little glad if not heartbroken#that she did get out of it in the end like trans curly and anya destroy me even more its so upsetting like he didn't realize how much he go#you girl and waited to act like it was cowardice but then would she not realize what hes realizing? should that be a grace or more of a#condemnation in her mind like what are her thoughts? espically during the scene Jimmy hits Curly like she had to hear and what did she thin#they are tormented in a similar hells with the same demon and its fascinating#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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Ellen McLain’s commentary from my trivia playthrough
#She's so cute <3#WPP#Portal#Ellen McLain#If you haven't played through the audio commentary I would Absolutely recommend it it is So fun#I clicked out of curiosity - kind of just expecting like a movie's audio commentary y'know? Like a video that highlighted specific scenes#No it's just the whole game again but with trivia pop-ups! I love that!!#It reminded me so much of like trivia track or the pop up fun facts from special editions of movies I would watch as a kid#But you can play through them!! You have to click on them and they spin! I love that!!!#I always love hearing the design and development process - fascinating how the playtesters reacted to this new game!#We take it for granted now but yeah I imagine it would've been very confusing at the time#And I was like ''Well it was such a small team and Ms. McLain was such a large part of it - surely she'll have a few bubbles?''#She does lol - as soon as I got to her first one (it was a slow burn! They buried the lead with her lol I'm already invested!) I had to go#I saved-quit the game out of sheer excitement and giddiness lol I had to sleep on it before I was ready to come back#It is so cool to hear her natural voice ah <3 And the kinds of direction she was given! Other bubbles also talk about her vocal direction :)#Very cool! I wonder what TTS they used for reference :0#But to hear her real laugh without the audio processing over and and she still sounds like GLaDOS! I mean of course she does but just jfdksl#That's /her/ laugh! They share a laugh! It's a very similar laugh!!#Not to mention her talking about wanting to play and just fdskalfd they clearly did such a good job with her performance and ahhh#It's too cute it's all too cute sharing a room with GLaDOS while her voice actor talks about making a cake to share with her friends stopppp#I am so enamoured <3#I also took a bunch of screenshots of GLaDOS still shit-talking while she was being destroyed lol#Actually beat the ending in one try this time :P I ran out of time the last time pfft#But now I've beaten it twice in as many days :D Although I did start it the first time several days ago - but I beat it again quickly!#Has me all the more itching to replay 2 ♪#WPVG
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1.10 / 1.09
#something to be said not just about how Ibrahim aims to replace his past family with his present bond with Süleiman (and Musti and Mahi#branch off of that bond) but also how Hatice fits in all of this - the one Ibrahim leans on everytime he's likely to lose SS is *her*#she isn't just the future he wants to secure in the castle but also the past he yearns for outside of it especially in that initial period#of their relationship; and not just any past but a very particular fragment of it - the next most valuable person of his past other than#his brother: his *mother*. it's no wonder him playing *his mother's* melodies with the violin marks the beginning of their story and stays#an important motif throughout. just like Ibrahim's mother Hatice is so familiar yet so out of reach (and this unreachability accumulates in#E13 - Ibrahim leaves for Parga thus returning to his past but leaving Hatice behind but *then* finding out his mother is gone too.#*both* people he wants to be close to soo much are *gone* in that moment. there's a link between them because of this. also Hatice tieing#lbrahim's mother to “heaven” as well and her “looking at their happiness from above” Ibro responds with in E14.) Hatice will distance#more and more from that role later on until lbrahim starts to outright abandon this whole 'return to the past' idea with Hatice and#search for it through Nigar instead. but yeah anyway I feel these two scenes are the perfect encapsulation of how complicated#the past is for lbrahim; he avoids remembering it because it *hurts* to remember both because why would he remember it when he already has#an established future and because deep down he resents what he's become and established as that isn't ever permanent and he's lost all else#*himself* most of all as who is a person without his roots? he wants to forget them but can't ever do it so what's left is replacing them#*all of them*; when he finds Hatice too he wants to have *both* her and Süleiman and SS marrying Hatice off directly challanges that want#up to that point he believed in the possibility of their love more than Hatice did; now? he seems as lost as she is not knowing what to do#the only way not to lose either of them is accepting Süleiman's order convincing himself that this is how it should be no matter how much#that hurts and would bury him even deeper; he can't bear it so he searches for a solution - and when he sees Rhodes sea? it hits him#it hits him how low he's actually sunk through the losses and if he can't “fully* replace the past he'll *fully* return to the past letting#*everything else* once hidden out as well. not to mention how right before he left to Parga he was brought to fear for his literal death#and then he is given more power that also brings some uncertainty with it and that likely scared him cementing his departure for Parga#directly following Piri Pasha's advice to let power go as it won't let *you* go#(btw a big contrast between S01 and S03 Ibrahim can be drawn in his relationship with Piri Pasha and his relationship with Ebusuud)#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#muhtesem yuzyil#ibrahim pasha#(sorry for the disorganized tags but if I kept it like it was I would've exceeded the limit before I even finished 😅)#(just Ibrahim and Hatice in general are people who latch onto each other to get over their losses and ache for peace amidst their turbulent#lives and positions and that's what keeps them close and will later too)
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i'm the antonymph of the internet
#how many tributes to this song will i make in my life#MANY ! it literally changed my life and means a lot to me. i love antonymph and vylet pony's music is worth checking out - please do.#unsupervised internet access as a queer neurodivergent kid anthem !!#i chose to do misty since we all know i like drawing her in experimental pieces and putting her in outfits. she also has art in a gir hoodi#from the clash team in treasure trove!! :D#this is also experimental/stylistic as well!! had fun!! nice to just draw something in one day and not worry. leaves me tired but...#haven't done a nice piece like so in one day in a while!!! i'm very proud :] it's a fun one#anyways... both a little tribute to the song and misty as a character#ihave so many thoughts about misty even if i dont talk publicly on them. shes a very interesting character to me and i care about her so#much. i compared her to fluttershy in the past - and realized that if i liked ttcc as a kid she would've been my favorite.#fluttershy on her own meant a lot to me as a child. including mlp itself as it's one of the core things that got me into drawing art online#a lot of my analysis on misty and headcanons at least on the more emotional scale do come from a bit of projecting but...it makes it more#fun to me when i can put myself into the shoes of a character like her who i already relate to. rrghh too bad im scared to talk about her#too much in nuanced detail in public since some people are... not so nice about her. though i know the tumblr audience is nice and unders#standing!!#anyways from me just having fun being me#i let misty have a little bit of fun... something i think she would possibly enjoy? i do see her as someone who gets nostalgic#and is stuck in more childish things and matters. she wants to play ip dip with you...its very sweet to me. letting myself and her be#confident through a song that means so much to me is kind of powerful to me. i had a lot of fun making this drawing.#anyways. love this song. love ttcc. love mity /p. be swag and be self indulgent and have fun. you can do anything u want forevah#toontown#toontown corporate clash#antonymph#guz art#rainmaker
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tp-s!-era gijinka refs because i've been dying to do them for once. multiple versions too!
more details!! if you're not interested TOO BAD
- 5'1, average (if a bit short) height for his kind
- 20-21 years old by the time tp-s! takes place.
- i've said it multiple times, but i'll make it clear: the deranged result of splicing crab/craw worm genetics with that of a human's! resulting in these freaks <3
- although for whatever reason, he's not a mammal, or exactly one if we're being generous
- despite his strange looks, this is STILL that one yappity goofy dancing imbecile, except he has more limbs and swirly locks
- wears (apparently two pairs of) gloves for the specific purpose(s) of sparing people from the sight of bug hands™ (and protection from hazardous materials). imagine putting your hand in a bug's if it were human-sized. that's what it'd feel like.
- nothing's ever stopped science from making that new tail WORK. it's like a (freakishly long) third arm, and thankfully capable of bearing enough of anything despite its appearance. also prone to wagging like crazy
- ever since he's caught jack's eye, he wanted to impress him in more ways than one. unfortunately he manages to fall flat on his face in more ways than one as well. what little he and his employer have in common, absurd clothes are among them.
- to mirror his non-breathing gimmick in the game itself, he's got absurd lung capacity (also helps that he doesn't have a nose..) and o2 usage is delayed by about 5 seconds more
- plantigrade when he's got his boots on, digitigrade when they're off
- you know that trope where a character's hair is somehow compacted into a simpler shape? that's what's taking effect here
under the cut (at your own risk) vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv
(side-note: i really wanted to put in the drop-shaped appendages of a mantis shrimp around his lower back, but i think it'd kinda clutter the whole thing up ekejjaiak)
>> another thing i wanted to put in here but - again - didn't want my phone blowing up over was blood stuff. i figured it'd be like. a light teal/cyanish with amber specks. maybe it got a bit warmer/greener around the more "human-y" parts of his body and remained cool in the crabby spots.
#- gijinkatrap#- velveteen pen-scribblings ]#/ ns nudity#<- although *externally* there's really nothing to worry about. it's like a carcinized ken doll#twenty-four. twenty-four painstaking hours on ibispaint. heh#funny how two of my longest pieces are both gijinka!clap. this bozo's getting all of the attention#i contemplated putting a similar device to tim and jack's on the same leg but i relented cos i felt like i could've copied from my friend.#in any case i guess he still has it but i just wanted to play it safe /lh#i'm disappointed in myself for not making him. yunno. if i haven't already done his fucking clothes i would've!#so basically it's just there as a marking guide and nothing more lol#but all in all i'm satisfied this is finally over lmao#🎬
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crazy how folks on tiktok think "shipping" immediately means u want to see those characters date. like no!!!! i want to see them fight till they bleed but with a homoerotic vibe in the air!!!!
#this is. about#sonadow#sth#like. there r a lot of folks on it who don't like it which is Fair#idrc u do u can't do much about that but godddd#there r so many shipping cops over there it's insane#like YOU think that if they date it would be toxic? oh shit! i do too!!#that's the fun of it for me bc they would never date to begin with!!!!! because they r bitches who dgaf abt romance like that#like no. shipping doesn't immediately mean i want them to date shut up no#also folks on tiktok also base it off how canon it is too and it's like????? Huh. and sure maybe it would've been fine if most ships they#like r canon but. they use thapt as a way to be all like#''ur fav ship is poopy bc not cecen a bit close to canon'' and like. ok#i messed up the tags on accident so ough. edited this shit fr#but no srsly it's sto stupid shipping is already a mess let's not play cop rn
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as a note, I very much am not the president of Gale Dekarios and I do not want to be. I could be one of the people you need to block tbf! I am not trying to change anyone's mind and I have no interest in defending any company, even if it's one that made a game I like a whole bunch.
My niche is trauma representation and violence on screen. Within that niche, I do engage with fandom not just as a fan myself but as someone who writes about how meaningful these things can be. This includes seeing where, from lived experience and from observation, fandom gets incredibly toxic and creates an ouroboros of trauma triggers for the sake of a wholly invented cause they must fight for.
ily uwu
#wolfling housekeeping#i did not play baldurs gate during the death anniversary of a dear friend#because i am self aware enough to know#that i was already getting too tense about messing up the gale romance#and that if i had just played 24/7 like my hyperfixation brain wanted#and i finished bg3 and gale died#then that would've mingled and caused me to have a very serious episode in my own trauma#so i am not speaking down at you#i am reaching out at you#you have to know when to take a lap#and have a glass of water
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i know i kinda have a reputation to uphold as an astarionposter but like. he's not even my fav character in bg3...
#my ranking of the companions would be:#1. shadowheart 2. jaheira 3. lae'zel 4. astarion 5. wyll 6. halsin 7. karlach 8. gale and then minsc/minthara bc i haven't recruited either#idk i just really love how jaheira was portrayed in bg3 and i feel like she doesn't get enough love#+ lae'zel's story arc may not be as compelling to me personally as astarion's but. gith lore is like my absolute fav thing and i love her s#and i've already talked loads about how shadowheart is my no. 1#re: wyll i actually really like him and he would've been ranked higher if i hadn't played early access. i miss his more playful side tbh#halsin ranks higher than karlach or gale because of how much his being canon polyam means to me. also he's funny as hell#karlach and gale's stories just didn't resonate as hard with me ig?? i love them all they're just not my favs#there's literally no companion i actively dislike which is v strange bc in most games i usually HATE at least one.#in dao i HATED sten. in da2 it was seb. in dai it was cassandra. in poe2 it was pallegina. in nwn2 it was bishop. in wotr it was daeran#anyway i could go on and on about how larian made fundamentally flawed but still likable characters. i just love them sm.#edit: even though gameplay-wise wotr is one of my top games ever. i actively hated like half of the companions lmao#lmk if you want me to make a post about who i like and why in pfwotr bc i am Very Opinionated
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Me vs FF14 part... 2?
It's taken me pretty much three full days of running from cutscene to cutscene. But I've finally reached Heavensward.
And like... on some level? I'm kind of offended?
Like, a part of me genuinely wants to replay the entire game from the start "as something else" (different main-class, different race, different starting-area, whichever), because the dungeon-queuing system is actually really fun when you start to Understand it.
As in, FF14 has somehow made an MMO that has almost eliminated the feeling that it is a level-grind? Partially? It's turned the whole thing into a surprisingly comfortable level of (limited, but genuine) social interaction.
To the point where even someone who isn't obsessively grind-focused like me, can genuinely enjoy themselves. Just queuing up for dungeons, Hunting some bounties, and-...
And then FF14 has so many fucking quests that it literally chokes the life out of the gameplay.
As an example, one of their biggest dungeon-draws (bcs high rewards) is a quest that almost everyone hates playing. Because doing that dungeon means watching literally eighteen minutes of unskippable cutscenes.
And that's with them having reduced the amount of cutscenes in that dungeon, because the players complained so much about them.
Like... I'd be perfectly happy replaying the game from the start with a different character, even knowing that leveling isn't some kind of pain-free thing. But the thought of having to restart the fucking Main-Quest? Of having to spend literal days just running back-and-forth to cutscenes?
I'm currently feeling a bit burned-out as a result of the binge I went on to get here, but I'm pretty damn sure that I wouldn't replay this fucking thing even if you paid me for it.
(And, of course, Heavensward also has a Main-Quest continuation that you have to follow. And now I'm not even allowed to fly everywhere to cut down on the "running back-and-forth"-part of my complaints. Not until they arbitrarily allow me to discover flight for the new areas, by going through even more of the Main-Quest.)
(Not to mention that now I have to go back and do even more Class-quests, with their own cutscenes, in order to unlock a bunch of skills.)
(I'm very fond of the "the church is evil because it doesn't let you fuck dragons"-meme, and I'm very much seeing it. But like... come the fuck on. Why is this MMO a feature-length movie-series? Why can't I just play the game and have fun?)
#and yes. i'm very much aware that ''you can do anything with one character''#bcs everyone gets one (1) race-changing potion. and classes can be switched out super-easily. but that's not the point.#video games#ff14#rants#personal stuff#also like... i'm unemployed and waiting for my classes to begin a few weeks from now. i have INFINITE free-time.#and i still feel like ff14 is actively trying to waste my time by ''telling a story'' that should be in a single-player game.#... actually. that'd explain a lot. did the writers of this game learn to write from single-player games?#is that why there are so many cutscenes and minor characters to constantly juggle? did nobody tell them that they were making an MMO?#(the feeling of going ''all-in'' on the genuineness in the cutscenes even when it's corny as shit? good.)#(being forced to sit through cutscene after cutscene instead of actually playing the game? bad.)#like... even just the dungeon-cutscenes? to some degree it's expected that you SHOULD skip them? bcs you're making others wait?#(and during the Raids. that means outright being left behind. ain't nobody stopping for anyone.)#so you're losing a massive bit of story-telling. bcs it's trying to tell that story in the WORST place.#it's a good story? i guess? but it's so fucking inconvenient to _play the game around_ that it feels more like a chore than an adventure.#and in a single-person game? i think it'd be great. maybe not entirely my kettle of fish. but genuinely good. but as an MMO?#like i get that a lot of it has been added onto it over the span of YEARS and that ppl playing it since launch would've been desperate#for new content. despite how the amount of content seems incredibly overwhelming for new players.#but jesus fuck. at least let people wanting to start a new character to just... skip the fucking thing? they've already seen it once.#* nevermind. they thought of that. they're selling ''story-skip''-potions for 10$. wow. just... wow.
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But imagine Sam drinking demon blood and Castiel offering their blood but while they're in the bunker. Sam's preparing to be locked in the dungeon and Castiel will not let that happen.
Like you can have Sam who is falling apart at relapsing after being clean for so long. And Castiel who isn't as they were once before, depending on when this takes place, their grace is limited.
#I would personally place this after Gadreel's possession#Like maybe that's the trigger for Sam he already has blood on his hands#He feels as if he has no control of his life what is he fighting for anymore#He wanted to die and he could've and he would've been pure but it was taken from him#And he needs to feel that power again but immediately hates himself for it#And Castiel can't handle seeing Sam in suffering when they still see where the pins where in Sam's head#Still feels shame whenever they're reminded Sam's tattoo is gone bc of them#There's a lot to play around in this area#sam winchester#castiel#sastiel#samstiel
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maybe you should doodle however many or few starcon/helix/damned characters as you like (in human or alien form) in cute halloween costumes! imagine... ZEX dressed up as Ariel thelittlemermaid...
Day 26 - "I hadn't realized humans also had aquatic subcultures!" "Oh, well, uhm..."
#My art#Requestober#SCII#Damned#DAX#ZEX#The Captain#You can't tempt me like this I'm too weak to it agh#I am sorely convinced that with a Slightly longer time frame to work on this I would've gone with my first idea#It was way overly-ambitious for a less-than-24-hour time limit but hhghhh I /do/ want to draw everyone in cute costumes!!!#Super doesn't help that I very broke my sleep schedule and like as soon as this came in I fell asleep for three hours lol#And was still tired!!! That's just not fair says I#But I still managed >:3c Because I limited my scope haha but that's important too!! And it still turned out cute!!!#I mean how couldn't it - ZEX as The Little Mermaid is just-#I'm enamoured it's so perfect for him..........what an excellent idea...........definitely not going to be thinking about this for A While#Funnily enough my immediate thought was actually angst haha - the mermaid has to give up her voice! What would ZEX give up?#That he hasn't already anyhow - and then thoughts of reviving Zelnick but selfishly I just hhghgh I love himm I love themmmm#For now the cutes tho!!!!#It tickles me so bad that a significant portion of Damned takes place in October hehe <3 ZEX arrived in November but still!#And then the Halloween event to get their canon outfits back fjdskalfjd ahhh!!!#I'm many many years too late lol but there's something very lovely about the theme continuing ahh <3 <3#Oh yeah and there's also two others in costume here lol - the Captain's was easy haha <3 Dashing prince! He suits it ♪#For DAX lol at first I considered Triton? But he's not quite That bad about ZEX's human infatuation#Not that he's as admissive or manipulative as Ursula either - at some point it might've just become ''I want to see him in it'' lol#He's so happy about it haha <3#Can you tell I had fun with ZEX's costume lol - sparklies!!! Had fun with the glitter on his shoes :D#I Will find a place to use my scale brush anywhere and everywhere and that's a threat#I wonder what ZEX would think of human animation haha - I only remember there being one movie night at the Institute!#Surely Disney would get the greenlight to be played in the Sun Room! ZEX having a transcendent ''seen'' experience aw <3
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hey fob I just want to know I just wanna know how can I get the smfs elevator music on spotify hey no listen i just-
#fall out boy#fob#pete wentz#patrick stump#joe trohman#andy hurley#smfs#tourdust spoilers#if you watched the frnkgrl's livestream on instagram til the end you would've heard it#or obvi if you've been to a show already#I WANT IT SO BAD#I didn't look to see if it was fob playing or a recording owowo#I'm assuming a recording
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top 10 of 2023 ✦ first half
tagged by @chanrizard ! thanks again ♡ based mine on spotify since that's where i listen to all my music. also, i really wanted to do something that would allow me to highlight some of my favorite lyrics in these songs. ♡
i'll tag @agibbangs @boba-skz @minchanz @skz-films @yongbonk no pressure ofc ♡
translations credit:
kiss: ©captainuwu
*all other translations came directly from the videos or from colorcodedlyrics
#tag game#long post#flashing tw#fire tw#top 10 of 2023 [jan.-june]#the gifs could look better but what's new#these aren't in order of favoritism btw#but idk how to lay these out so...ig this is it#a few of these songs don't have a video (unless i missed it)#so i did my best with what we've got#it was surprisingly difficult to narrow this down to only 10#i wanted to put honorable mentions but this post is already so long#item and topline are tied but i couldn't think of smth for item </3#so topline it is#special shoutout to volcano for being my top song lyrically ♡#technically spotify doesn't play the canvas video behind the lyrics#but it would've been boring to just have solid different color bgs
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