#if I had to guess it’s because I really have nothing else going for me

[lostintransist]

Rudy. Fucking. Told.

Either him or Alejandro told Lieutenant Sanderson of your "death bed confession" as he called it when he first asked you about it. Fuckers. You were going to send them the nastiest coffee beans you could find.

"Hey," Roach grabbed you by the arm, turning you back towards him instead of letting you continue down the drab hall. "Talk to me."

Heaving out a sigh you let your face fall from the neutral smile you had trained to live there.

"What do we have to talk about, Bugs? I've told you I have nothing to say."

You couldn't call him Roach. When Soap had first heard you he laughed and pressed an elbow to Gaz's ribs.

"Called 'im bugs 'cause they're scared o' roaches."

They had laughed and you had glared.

"Simon is afraid of butterflies and Price can't stand spiders. Roaches are scary. Fuck off!"

Maria had snorted and glanced at Ghost. "Butterflies really?"

"They drink blood. They can live through nuclear bombs," he shrugs as if that explains it all.

"Alejandro pulled me aside before we left and told me what happened. About how Valeria's man said we weren't coming for you and you agreed with him before Rudy put him down." Roach's eyes punch you beneath his dark, furrowed brows.

Despite the hold he has on you the boots on your feet shift further back. "I don't have anything to say, Bugs. I don't want to talk about this, I nearly died—what a normal Tuesday for us all."

"Why did you think we wouldn't save you?" The hurt in his voice, as light as a descant played against the melody, is what did you in.

"Because you didn't!" The words roar out of you, all pent up anger and hurt rip through you. Nothing is left untouched. Like a dam breaking, the flow of words can't stop. "You didn't come for me! Los Vaqueros came for me and you know what? They managed it with a three man team."

Roach is still holding your arm, now more out of confusion than trying to pause you. Stepping forward, his elbow bends. Ripping your body from his grasp, your words keep picking up debris as they head for lower ground.

"I talked to Rudy afterwards. The five man team Price ran to get Maria? Unnecessary. You all could have taken it with two men. But no! I love Maria, I do. She is amazing and a perfect fit for the team." Your volume is growing. Trying to adjust it now will trigger the bomb of tears and you can't afford that to happen. Not now. "But not once have I ever truly felt a part of this team and the fact not a single fucking one of you could stand losing Maria, but could lose me? Fuck me, I guess. I am always the one left behind! Do you know how many times I have been left at the bar? Or nearly left behind on ops for that matter?"

The floodwaters take out the bridge, tearing it clear from its abutments as you continue. Roach can't cut in. Confused horror paints his face, watching as people and things wash away.

"Six! I stopped going to the bar because every-fucking-time I get left behind. 'Oh they'll catch up!' or 'They already left!' or no one even notices I didn't make it back to base! But god forbid someone else steps outside for a smoke. Then? Then it's 'oh where is Soap? Can't leave him here' or 'Roach is visiting the head.' I don't go to the bar with the team anymore because all it does is remind me that no one wants me to be a part of the team. The last time it happened?" You voice breaks. You push forward, repeating your last question before saying more. "I had gone to the bar to get another round for everyone and came back to an empty table."

The waters are swallowing you now. Creaking in your voice and slipping into your nose causing it to run.

"One mistake nearly a year ago and you all still treat me like I don't exist. You wanna know what really happened that day, Gary?" You cough once, hard into your hand to clear the phlegm from your throat. "I couldn't take the shot because there was a man, a man who looked exactly like you. The idea I might have taken you out instead? I froze. Come to find out it was your brother. My mistake of caring about you so much it makes my heart hurt led to me being pushed out in all but paperwork and the death of four-hundred and sixty-two people."

One sip of air is all you get before the trees ripped from the earth pin you under the water as it continues to move.

"So, no, Gary. I really don't want to talk about it."

Walking away from the gas fire the flood of your emotions started is easier than it should have been. Gary stood frozen. His mouth hung agape on his face as you walked away, wiping at the tears streaming down your face with a pulled down sleeve.

Fuck.

Maybe you should put in those transfer papers that have been taking up space in your brain and on your desk for the past six months.

A/N: OOOW. Well damn. That hurt.

Masterlist | Taglist

The cold metal touched you forehead.

"They aren't coming," the words are flavored with an accent and the pleasure of your pain.

The team didn't want you, not like they wanted Maria.

Maria, who served savagely and drank wildly. Maria, who could be called stoic and was everything expected of a member of Task Force 141. Maria, who they wanted, who they would save when presented the choice. Maria... Maria... Maria who was your friend and you hoped to the gods beyond the stars they reached in time.

You were nothing like Maria, bright and full of laughter. You fought with the devil at your back but one mistake (and not meeting the visual standard of a special forces soldier) had damned you to a lonesome death.

"I know," the wretched whisper, acknowledged everything that could no longer be ignored.

When the bang of a gun rang out, you flinched—it wasn't your body that fell.

[chara-cat5]

lads isekai au ch 12

reader is gender neutral, warning: swearing, mdni

masterlist

first 1

previous 11

next 13

(q/a for any confused readers!!)

"you're not miss bodyguard."

you fidgeted your hands under rafayel's gaze, standing in the door to his studio while he sat perched on a ladder.

'why did i agree to this?'

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"damn it."

both your and caleb's gazes snapped to mia, her soft curse directed at her phone as she glared at it.

"what is it, pipsqueak? something wrong?"

she looked up, a slight nervousness in her eyes. she turned off her phone, putting it down face down.

"no, it's nothing. a friend just needed something..."

"a friend, huh?"

you don't know if caleb had talked to her about sylus, but from his passive aggressive tone, you guessed he was assuming that is who she meant. you really shouldn't get involved with this...

"is it tara? i can take care of it. just text me the address."

the two glanced over to you, but you forced your gaze to stay on your breakfast, chewing casually.

---------------------------------

and thats how you ended up here. a pouty fish climbing down his ladder, already complaining.

"she said she was coming over, but she lied and sent someone else instead. and here i was, excited to finally get to see her. she's been ignoring me for aaaaaages now."

you bit back an annoyed huff, shifting your feet.

"she just had a few things she needed to do. i can help you with whatever you need though."

he huffed, moving through the studio. without much else to do, you followed him.

"well, i wanted time with miss mia today... but i guess we can do some errands without her."

he made it to what looked like a bedroom, moving right to the connecting bathroom. you stayed in the bedroom part, moving to the large window. you looked out past his wispy curtains at the beach below.

"what kind of errands are we talking? grocery shopping?"

"pah-leese. we're going to a market, cutie. i hope you wore walking shoes."

you glanced at the door to the bathroom, humming softly. a farmers market actually sounded pretty fun, but with rafayel? you'd probably just end up carrying his bags.

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the market place was a little crowded, other customers milling around, chatting among themselves. this had defiantly been a date idea meant for rafayel and mia to experience, plenty of other couples happily weaving among tables. you followed behind rafayel, keeping an eye on him while also browsing yourself. you weren't sure what he was here for exactly, but farmers markets were always fun so why not relax a little? you paused at one shop, looking at the delicious loaves of bread. you picked up a loaf of sourdough, taking note of the little heart cut into the top.

"spot something you want, cutie?"

you glanced up, meeting pink-blue eyes over you shoulder. he looked over the different loaves, picking up the one in your hand.

"we'll take this one."

you watched them exchange money, huffing softly as he took the bag and started walking again.

"i was just looking. you didn't have to get it."

"yeah, but you wanted it. so i did."

you scrunched up your face, following along. he stopped every so often, buying a few things. he didn't actually hand you the bags, fine with carrying what he bought. he did give you the bread, but that's because he bought it for you. when asked why, he dodged the question, just telling you to share it with mia. the two of you took a break halfway through, stopping in the shade while he organized his bags. you caught sight of a table selling meat skewers and you bought two. one with chicken and one with shrimp.

'rafayel likes seafood, right?'

walking back over, you hold the shrimp one out to him.

"here you go. snack time."

he blinked at it before taking it from you, tilting his head at it. you just ate your own, happily chomping down. he took a bite, watching you closely.

"... were they out of chicken?"

you glanced up, mid-bite, surprised by his question. you slowly lowered your skewer, glancing between his gaze and his skewer.

"do you... not like shrimp?"

he hummed, taking another bite, looking away casually.

"no i do. i was just wondering why you got me a different type."

shit. you hadn't thought it through when you bought them, only thinking about getting him something he'd like. excuse excuse excuse- ah!

you padded closer, drawing his gaze. before he could relax, you bit the next shrimp on the stick. he blinked at you as you chewed, lips parting slightly.

"hey! thats mine!"

you let out a laugh, holding out your own skewer.

"you can try mine too. sorry, i just wanted to give the different types a taste."

he hummed, hesitantly bitting into a piece of chicken. he chewed with a skeptical look, narrowing his eyes.

"how's it taste? it's good right? love me some greasy food!"

you took another bite, glad to be able to distract him for even a moment.

"it's good. thanks for getting me one."

you gave him a smile, nodding happily.

"no problem!"

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after your time at the farmers market, you returned to his studio, helping him put up his purchases. you put the food in the kitchen and a basket he had insisted on getting in the middle of the counter.

"do you think i bought too much?"

you hummed softly, glancing in his direction.

"i wouldn't say you got too much, no. as long as you eat all the food, you aren't being wasteful. it should probably help you eat more constantly anyway. i know how artists like you get sucked into their work."

you went back to organizing his fridge, not noticing the elongated pause. when you did notice the silence and closed the door, you were met with a cheshire cat smile.

"an artist like me, hmm? and just what does that mean cutie?"

you blinked at him. geez- how many times have you fucked up with revealing too much? first sylus, then caleb (from him overhearing), then rafayel. twice today!

"i-... i just know how artists are. i had a friend a while back and had to force her to eat and drink water..."

he watched you for a moment longer before stepping around you, towards his bedroom.

"alrighty. well, i have a bath to take so you can go now. tell mia i expect something extra for skipping out today."

you watched him go, feeling like that was too easy.

'not the time to look a gift horse in the mouth, time to go.'

.

.

affinity l̶e̶v̴e̵l̸ [19]

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taglist: @sleepisfortheweakpooh @plzdonutpercieveme @young-adult-summer @mentaltrouble2201 @noxus123 @asakiyu @leftpoetrymoon @hon3yydew @anemobabygirl @clandestienly @crimsonrubie @beaconsxd @yuurisfavblog @cutiesgaloree @udejoenrlddo @mephisto-with-a-knife @poptrim @rhoswen-drake @szafficat

hello!!

don't know if this one seems too short, the notes app was starting to go slow on the page, but that might be because last chapter was too long, dunno. i do in twos on each 'note' and after a certain word count, it gets choppy.

anyway, raf has returned! love a little sassy fishy. got work today, so i'll probably only get one chapter today and one chapter tomorrow, we'll see.

thank you for reading!!

-chara <3

[n3ptoonz]

'She's My Collar'

THANKS FOR 700+!!😁😁❤️❤️

Pairing: Congressman!Bucky/F!Reader

Fandom: MCU

Warnings/tags: Smut; Explicit, sub!bucky; dom!reader, assistant!reader, handjob, orgasm denial, he's terrible at hiding his emotions, praise kink!!! small dirty talk; dialogue, kinda proofread

the way i kept almost scrapping this bc i didn't want it to be like every other assistant reader fic like😭but i did it yayyy!!

edit: in consideration for another part

Word count: 2.3k+

It's been a long day. Ironically enough, more for you than him. You may not be his writer but you surely have to pick up some of the pieces after he fumbles when talking to the press about literally anything. Three knocks pressed against his door before you walked in, well aware he didn't care when it was you. Not many people were allowed to just roll up on him like that, if even anybody else.

You opened your binder and handed him a sheet of next week's schedule already. His cheeks puffed with the future exhaustion that was yet to come, but still he thanked you as he always does. He never lets you go until you've heard him say thank you, especially because he knows you didn't expect it. It's your job. It's what you get paid to do for whoever sits in that chair. That and you don't take any bullshit. A bit funny considering you've never had to remind him of that, not that you ever needed to--which was refreshing.

"Not a problem," you said with a small smile. "You have a one o'clock conference to attend downstairs but they didn't tell me what it was about. Just told me to deliver the message but press will be there. Look alive, Barnes."

Bucky nodded and checked his watch, still having some time but he figured he get an early head start. He stood up and grabbed a thin binder full of papers. "Let's just head down now. Get this over with."

You walked down the halls with a confident stride, him not so much.

"Try not to look like someone pissed in your cereal, yeah?" you said with a glance as you stopped in front of the boardroom. That earned a faint smirk and soft huff through his nose.

"Yes ma'am." he said. You narrowed your eyes.

"You mocking me?" you playfully accused.

"Never in a hundred and ten years." he teased back before checking his watch again with a tired sigh already. "I guess this is me."

"Stay alert and don't freeze." you reminded him with a pat on his back. He gave you a puzzled look.

"I don't freeze."

"Long pauses then saying absolutely nothing important is adjacent to freezing." you remarked and gestured for him to go in. He had a look of 'do I really do that?' written all over his face before he gave you one more glance and went in.

A long hour and a half later, you came back to his office with a sheet of paper fresh off the printer sitting atop your binder. Two--determined--knocks pressed to his door before you walked in. He looked up at you from his desk, taking note of your neutral expression that was a bit tighter than usual.

"We need to work on your media training." you said while sliding the paper onto his desk. He skimmed the paper and slowly looked up with a sheepish look. "That bad, huh?"

"You looked like you wanted to toss that reporter from the top of the building." you deadpanned, a hint of humor in your tone.

"He shouldn't have stood so close." he grumbled, making you roll your eyes. "Don't I have writers for this kind of thing?"

"Yeah, for official statements. Speeches. You have to be prepared for as many angles as possible. I can't keep covering for you."

"...Why not?" he asked in genuine curiosity.

You blinked at him. "Barnes, I am your assistant." you said like it was the most obvious thing in the world--because it is. "You're lucky I'm willing to help."

You took off your blazer and smoothed out your slacks before taking out your phone. Ignoring his short grumble of protest, he couldn't say no. Not to you. He glanced up at you typing away and admired you from afar. His blue eyes pooling with curiosity and maybe...no. You are his assistant. Get your shit together, Barnes.

"You have strengths and weaknesses in different areas but the areas you lack are critical. One wrong move and the media will eat you alive."

"Right." he said with a short nod but was half paying attention.

You were saying something. Something about diplomatic responses. General answers that still relieve the question. Right? Something like that. You gestured towards the sheet and all...but his ass was not listening. Your dress shirt leaving everything up to the imagination as it was buttoned up to your collar bone. The longer you talked, the more time he had to just look at you; admire the view.

Damn it. He truly couldn't help it. You were pacing back and forth, hips sauntering unintentionally. The very subtle curve of your ass rising and falling from the side. Just- the general way you carried yourself was so incredibly sexy to him. How could he focus on a thing?

This is a small issue that's plagued him for a while now. Most of the time he's able to push this feeling down. Ignore it and let it go to the back of his mind, especially because, hello, he had more important shit to worry about. But whenever you lingered around in his office? Could be a regular conversation to discussing the following weeks, he has to kick himself so he didn't slip into every perverted thought that could flash across his eyes and fuck up the momentum.

That, and he might just be a little scared of you. But in a good way.

"...including your facial expressions." you finished what you were saying and were going to continue when you noticed he just locked back in. Hand on his chin, his brows raised and gaze more at attention.

"Barnes." you prompted.

"Hm?"

"Are you listening to me?"

"Uh, yeah. I was listening." - liar

"What was the last thing I said?"

Bucky cleared his throat and smacked his lips in feigned thought. He hadn't a damn clue. You put your phone down and leaned your palms on his desk. You weren't aware that you were making matters worse as you watched him avert his eyes down at his nails for a second.

"James." you said with narrowed eyes. He could hear his heart thumping in his ears. "Can you look at me?"

"Not really." he said under his breath, that familiar twitch under his pants making it borderline impossible to focus. He nearly squirmed under your scrutiny. How could his own assistant have this effect on him? You were so naturally authoritative and had your shit together, it was to the point of him questioning his own self some days.

You sighed and walked over next to him. He looked to his right for a moment before you undid some of the buttons of your shirt to reveal only a bit of your cleavage, but just enough. Leaning forward and seeing him rock solid before he quickly tried to cover it up brought an amused smile to your face.

"Here's what's going to happen," you began while carefully rolling up your sleeves. Your left arm draped over the back of the chair while your right hand scooted his out of the way of his erection. Embarrassed isn't even the word. If you didn't blink, you'd practically see it pulsating beneath its constricted fabric. He sighed and stopped trying to fight it. Cat's out of the bag!

"I'm going to read the questions at the top of the sheet and you're going tell me which response corresponds with each one," you pointed to the words on the paper yet all his focus was on your fragrance and your side boob completely taking over his peripheral. "And I will take care of that while you figure it out."

Bucky blinked and looked up at you, his eyes following down your arm and seeing you point to the length against his thigh.

"Uh- What?" he returned your gaze. Yeah, you definitely were not doing a bit. Probably the most serious he's seen you in a minute.

"Come on. We don't have all day. Should be easier than talking your ear off, right?" you said. He was appalled by how nonchalant you were being about this but he could see that very, very rare mischief was sure to present itself in your eyes. He grumbled again, this time it sounded more like frustration at himself. Or at his suddenly tight his pants became.

Bucky shimmied a bit before he was able to pull his dick out; fully hard and in desperate need of touch. He sucked in a sharp breath not only from the cold air, but also the sound of you already spitting in your palm.

When you wrapped your hand around him, he tensed. Not from discomfort, but he cannot remember the last time he was touched in such context. Too fucking long. He let out a soft, low groan and an even softer "Fuck" after.

You leaned further into him to the point where you were cheek to cheek, stroking him and jutting your chin towards the paper.

"Look alive, James," you prompted, he gripped the arm rests and blew a shallow breath to ground himself. He nodded a few times and squirmed, jaw clenched. You purposely changed the tone of your voice and he was due to fall apart from that alone.

"Okay," he whispered. Abs flexed and biceps tense under his suit. "Go."

You picked a question at random, stroking him at a steady pace. He grunted and stared hard at the paper. The words jumbled and made less sense the more seconds that went by.

"Uhh...shit, um-"

"Wrong." you said and let go. Bucky's eyes snapped open as he let out a pained groan.

"Why'd you do stop?" he asked. He meant for it to come out annoyed but he sounded more desperate than anything.

"Tell me what that says." you said as you pointed to the question you picked. His Adam's apple bobbed as he gulped, repeating what you asked. Your hand found his shaft and started stroking him again. His breath stuttered as he took a deep breath and answered correctly this time.

"Good job," you whispered and increased the speed a little bit. His hips bucked slightly into your hand when the praise rang through his ears. If he was going to be praised by you, he better get these next answers right.

You picked another question that was easier. He could get this with his eyes closed.

Oh, they were.

"C'mon. You can do it," you said. The feeling of the side of your mouth moving against his face was adding to the sensation. "James." you added in, and when you slowed down he panicked and answered something that wasn't even on the paper.

You pulled away and he bucked upwards again like he was chasing your hand. His shoulders were stiff and he looked like he wanted to cry.

"Fuck- I'm sorry," he said with clenched teeth. "Please, I can do this." he continued with heavy breaths.

You smiled softly at his determination. Well, that wasn't the only thing you were cheesing about. Reducing a man that was so well put together to a shaking mess was the highlight of your day. The highlight of your job, really. Good thing it was lunch.

You started back up. This time was slower.

"You want me to go faster, earn it." you said.

"Yes, ma'am." he replied breathlessly. You asked a question, he licked his lips and stopped holding his breath. Finally, he got this one correct. You hummed in satisfaction and stroked him faster.

"Good job," you said. The pride in your voice made his heart rate rise. Another question, another correct answer that he almost missed, but got it nonetheless. You increased the pace and praised him once more. "You're doing great, James."

A choked moan escaped him and he started blushing like crazy.

"More." he muttered. So quiet you almost didn't catch it. "Please."

You asked one more question that wasn't on the paper and his heart nearly stopped.

"You wanna cum for me?" you asked, your thumb briefly running over the tip. His body jerked and he painfully groaned again. "James, I need a verbal answer."

"Yes." he spat out. Eyes closed and head resting on the back of his chair. "I wanna cum for you. I need to cum for you. Please."

"You did such a good job today, James. I'd say you earned it. Do you think you earned it?" you asked. He caught his bottom lip between his teeth so he wouldn't let the whole floor know about this personal training session you had going on.

"Yeah- Yeah, I earned it. I earned it- Fuck, don't stop-"

Bucky's lungs filled with oxygen the very seconds before his climax hit him in the gut. Short, quieted breaths leaving his lips as you decided to cover his mouth for him. And boy, did he let loose. The vibrations against your palm while the other stroked him through that release. Softened broken sobs seeping through your fingers. You shushed and cooed, praising him more.

As he started to relax, shoulders slumping against the chair, you let go of his now soft dick and wiped your hand with a napkin from his drawer. He sat there, hazy and staring at the ceiling. His eyes drifted back down to you fixing your shirt. Trying to memorize what your hands felt like on him. You grabbed the paper and tossed it in recycling. Turning to face him, you saw him sit up and get himself decent with a tired look on his face, a faint smirk to himself.

"Would you like to grab dinner later?" he asked as he slicked back his hair, a habit he had when trying to push down nervousness. You were fixing your cuffs while you were making your way towards him again. You sat at the corner of his desk next to him, hooking your index finger under his chin and leaning in just close enough to your lips being a breath away.

"I'll think about it."

[housemdork]

house md rewatch: 2x17, "all in"

hit it, lady gaga. does it count as a poker face if you're talking over the phone, though?

and if i said this is my "three stories?" would that break your trust in me?

it doesn't do the same story work as 1x21, nor is it all that innovative in its presentation, and YES, it's a bit gimmicky, but i love her (2x17). next to 5x04, it's probably my most watched, which is why i was surprised when i realized i don't have a ton to say! one of 2x17's strengths is its directness/efficiency, so this recap may just read like a big appreciation post, more than anything else.

and what i want to appreciate first is how wonderful everyone looks :)

foreman is kinda real for that lol ^

second, i think someone told the writers' room what "haunting the narrative" meant when they started drafting this episode and they Ran with it. apart from reinforcing house's addiction to the puzzle and reaffirming his godhood along the way, i couldn't decipher much more about the old patient esther. the king james bible dictionary (lmfao) says that the name comes from the old persian word for star, "satarah," which could allude to a sort of northern star situation; something that house strives for. but it's also a stereotypical old people name, and house as god is actually deconstructed by the end of 2x17, so who knows.

at a textual level, what i liked the most about 2x17 was its self-awareness about its driving theme/allegory: gambling & games of chance is like diagnostics. audiences are fully down with the sickness atp, so to speak; this isn't news for us. but the kid patient ian and his parents are NOT down with this. every time the team unveils a new potential diagnosis, the parents try to roll with the punches but grow increasingly restless and distrustful of house. fair enough!

the team's stress mounts as ian begins tanking just like esther did twelve years ago, and right around the time that the party has about 2 hours to go, so does ian. their desperation turns to a numbers/instinct game, with house having a very Always Bet On Black moment with his repeated erdheim chester diagnosis. it ends in his favor; his celebration is very much that of a gambling addict, too. but remember this for later!

back to self-consciousness: house and wilson have a very interesting conversation when rehashing the esther saga from twelve years ago. wilson, because he's a theatre/literature/pop culture nerd (a man after my own heart), reasonably compares esther to house's own personal moby dick. house replies with a short tirade against metaphors:

"you do realize that the point of metaphors is to scare people from doing things by telling them that something much scarier is going to happen than what really will happen? god, i wish i had a metaphor to explain that better."

first, i have to laugh because house does nothing but use metaphors every chance he can to describe things from the mundane to the medically complex. but more importantly, here, house md is directly acknowledging the shakiness of the metaphor of gambling/doctors. its anticipating the audience's renewed anxiety - will my health be reduced to such a turbulent guessing game? - and maybe even taking a stab at repairing that anxiety. i think this is so clever!! i love manipulating and acknowledging the genre!

this discomfort translates to house, too, like i've alluded to above. esther really does haunt his narrative, and we've never seen him outwardly celebrating cracking a case like this one before. he himself is unwilling to admit to the gambling/doctoring dichotomy, either, because it would reinforce his fallibility. even when cuddy directly (and rightfully) attacks him for hijacking the case, he doesn't totally relent.

"sometimes you lose, house! you're not god!"

very, very true and important and telling!

house's fallibility isn't just thrown in his face via dialogue or inward self-doubt, however. it's obviously unusual for house specifically to be dressed so formally ever since the vogler/lab coat debacle. but as the case progresses, the pomp and circumstances of the poker tournament fall away. while the fellows don their lab coats and Doctor Gear, house strips down:

his second to last iteration is the sterile gown he wears while sitting next to ian with cuddy. i like how this transfers this motif to cuddy, too. they're both without their pretty poker night outfits, united in a cleanroom with concern. that happens a lot - the patient's urgency trumps their tension/pettiness. subtle but forever mounting moments of solidarity between them.

the revelation that it was, in fact, erdheim chester all along in ian and esther's cases superficially restores house's poker face. he's reclaimed that godhood card - on the surface. wilson delivers cuddy's same point in another instance of vulnerability like the cleanroom moment. this time, the text of 2x17 hands wilson the self-consciousness reins. he forces house to confront the immense gamble he won, and their resulting laughter is one the audience can join in:

in Every Way, this scene is stripped back. the hospital is actively disassembling the poker night decorations/paraphernalia. they aren't using poker chips anymore. their clothes are in equal states of disarray; i don't quite understand why wilson hung back for so long lol. and house's cigar is lit, whereas in the first poker game, it was a prop to irritate and see through wilson and cuddy's poker faces. now wilson can see through its literal smokescreen.

this is also the first time house/wilson and cigars makes landfall. i'm obsessed with this motif.

better yet, house doesn't call. he doesn't try to read wilson - he's too busy being read for filth himself. i truly love this scene, especially when you think about all the pseudo-marital problems they've been having lmfao.

finally, i need to address the Hudson Psychosexual Games of it all. they play THROUGH wilson. the trifecta is trifecta-ing. for now, this reads as an isolated incident, and showcases how well these 3 know each other. i like that it finally invites cuddy into the mix since she'll quickly become integral to house and wilson and all the rest in a way that's not fully realized yet. more than that, i like how she and house can see through the communication barrier. above all, however, i'm obsessed with the thrill wilson gets from the arrangement. freak. obviously there's more to come on this matter >:)

i just love this episode. 10/10. no notes. and look how happy he is that he won the tournament! never mind that he couldn't have done it without house's help! he beat burman, from business affairs! (i can recite his dialogue here from memory).

i'm gonna throw up.

[aahsokaatano]

It's kind of a frustrating ability.

I can't extend it to protect someone else, or even really control it. One time I gave an entire presentation to my 8th grade class, only to realize at the end that no one heard it, because time had stopped to give me time to get away from a bee that had somehow ended up in the classroom (turns out I have an allergy that I wasn't aware of).

I've made the best of it, though. If the universe wants to give me a get-out-of-jail-free card, then I'm not going to complain (too much). I just wish that there was something I could, y'know, do with it.

And then everything stopped while I was walking to work one morning. I could tell immediately - the rain froze in place, and the people around me stopped moving. Great, okay, what is it this time? Car skidding out of control? Lightning about to strike? Mugging about to go wrong?

Except... I couldn't see anything around me that seemed to be the issue. I kept going, down the block, and then the next four, weaving through the people frozen like statues and grimacing at the weird sensation of walking into stagnant rain.

I walked until I hit the edge of the city, but nothing changed, and my stomach sank. This couldn't be good.

I ended up just going back home - partly because I wasn't sure where else to go, and partly because I wanted my bike. It seemed I was going to have to really cover some ground to get away from whatever this was.

But when I sat down and balanced on one foot, the other resting on its pedal, I hesitated. Something bad was about to happen. Something that was big enough to cover at least half of the city, and probably more. And I was going to... run away? Hadn't I always bitched and moaned about how frustrating it was that my power wasn't good for helping other people, just myself?

Maybe this was my chance to actually fucking do something, for once. After all, I had all the time in the world.

Biking around the city was pretty fruitless, until I thought to look up. And there I finally found them - two small shapes, way up in the sky, clearly caught in the middle of a super-powered tussle. Irritatingly high, in fact. Why does it seem like all the people who end up doing the super hero/super villain shit end up flying? It's very inconvenient for the rest of us!

Whatever they were doing was about to destroy the city, clearly, so I needed to break up the catfight somehow. And to do that, I needed to get up there.

Machinery doesn't really like working outside of time - hence the regular old bicycle - but I can make it happen with enough patience. And god knows I've got plenty of that. Good thing, too, because first I had to read up on how to operate a crane, and those things are fucking complicated. Then there was the issue of moving one close enough to the idiots to be useful (more carefully than anyone has ever moved a crane before, because I couldn't exactly ask people to move out of the way), and getting the arm in position... Let's not even get into how sketchy it felt climbing the arm up towards the idiots.

But I did it, some how. I was still quite a ways below them, but a lot closer than I had been on the ground. This close, I could at least identify the idiots. The hero was actually from the much bigger city a short ways away - I guess we technically count as part of their territory, but they weren't usually seen around here, which meant that it was probably the villain who had tried some shit. She wasn't even one of the heavy hitters that was on the news with some kind of regularity; in fact, the most recent story on her had ended with a group of aspiring teenage heroes shutting her down.

She must have upped her game since then, if whatever was about to happen between these two was going to destroy my city. Not that I have any particular claim over it, I'm not a hero myself, obviously, but shit, I live here. I'd like to continue living here! And that can't happen if these idiots level the place!

It was a little difficult to work out exactly what was happening from my awkward angel below them, but I eventually pieced together that the hero's palm, glowing with energy, was millimeters above some kind of contraption that the villain was holding. Seemed as likely the culprit as anything else. And if I was wrong, then I would just have to try something else.

The best tool always has been, and always will be, a big stick, and you can quote me on that. It's what started our distant ancestors on the path of becoming human, and it's what I used to knock the stupid hexagon-box-thingy out of the villain's hands. It dropped right down towards me, and I did not catch it, because I was still holding my stick with one hand, and hanging on to the crane with the other.

Didn't really matter, though, because suddenly things were moving again.

" - end your... What the fuck?"

"Hi!" I waved cheerfully, causing the idiots to look down at me in shock. Which, fair. From their perspective, I - and a huge crane - had basically just appeared out of nowhere. "Both of you need to stop, 'kay?"

"Who are you?"

"No one important," I shrugged. "But you guys were about to destroy the whole city, and that would really suck, because I live here and also my favorite coffee shop is here."

"What did you do?" the villain demanded, looking around frantically for her device.

"Stopped you both from doing something stupid. You're welcome, by the way."

"How?" the hero asked. They looked even more confused than the villain.

"Oh, it wasn't easy! Took the equivalent of several weeks, which is the longest I've ever had by far, it was a very weird feeling, but I got here in the end. Now please go finish your fight somewhere else, I'm gonna be so late for work."

I turned and started shimmying my way back down the crane, ignoring the questions being shouted at me.

After all, I was on the completely wrong side of the city now, and I did have to get to work.

You were born with a strange power. Whenever you are in immediate danger, time freezes until you move out of the way. One day, time freezes, but no matter how far you go...it doesn't unfreeze.

[sfznyxio]

-ˋˏ AFTERGLOW ˎˊ

SYNOPSIS. how does your significant other act after sex?

CHARACTERS. luke pearce, artem wing, vyn richter, marius von hagen

CONTENT. f!reader. canon-compliant. fluff, suggestive. established relationship. 0.5k wc. rewrite of afterglow at my old main blog @/verxsyon. reader was written as rosa in mind. implied sex. hickeys (marius).

VERA. for once, i don’t have anything. have fun, i guess lol.

𝄞༉‧₊˚. LUKE PEARCE

to think that the person he gives himself to is someone he has known and loved since childhood.

he leans against your forehead, closing his eyes to listen to heartbeats and breathes mold into one. soon laughter breaks the silence. the session was interesting and also the most fun the two of you had for a while. there are still many things to discover about each other; the sherlock and watson of stellis will continue to grow their love that way.

“i’m so glad it’s you.” the sentiment of his confession grazes your lips. he doesn’t take long to capture them with his own. he presses a kiss on your forehead and tucks you in his chest, where his heart is beating only for you.

𝄞༉‧₊˚. ARTEM WING

not even once did he regret choosing you as his partner — professionally and romantically.

he takes your hands in his, admiring how they perfectly fit together. while leaving chaste kisses on your knuckles, he examines your face and finds features that are overlooked from afar. he was lost in the beginning, but you were there to guide him. he has so much to learn, and he trusts that you will teach him the topic of romance well.

“thank you.” he kisses you senseless while his hands roam aimlessly around your skin. you become dizzy that you don’t feel your back pressed against his chest. the slips an arm past your waist to hold your hand, wanting to let you know that he’ll always be there for you.

𝄞༉‧₊˚. VYN RICHTER

the human mind is intriguing, but nothing more is intriguing than the person who believes he has the capability to love.

he buries his nose in your neck, inhaling the scent of sweat and sex from the intimacy the two of you shared earlier. the smile spread across your skin feels victorious — not because he has you all to yourself, but because you managed to tame the beast inside him. he is thankful for your kindness; you have shown him that he should not be afraid of himself anymore.

“stay with me, please.” you do, earning a content sigh and a longing kiss on your shoulder. he hugs you tight as the two of you fall into dreamland, refusing to let you go.

𝄞༉‧₊˚. MARIUS VON HAGEN

of all paintings he has seen throughout his life, he has never seen a grander masterpiece such as yourself.

he smirks at the trail of bruises from your collarbone to the underside of your jaw, filled with pride knowing that they will show the whole world who you belong to. shackled by reality, only you can give him free reign to paint out his fantasies into life under the sheets. you really are different from everyone else, and he is determined to treasure you as long as he lives.

“can’t resist me, hm?” he growls in your ear when he catches you staring at him, making you flustered. he kisses your lobe before joining his hips with yours once more.

[theincorrigiblemagpie]

Rilla of Ingleside - Chapters 11, 12

"...some sentences in the letter made her cheeks burn and her heart beat" One of the problems of the Ken/Rilla romance is that we just don't see enough of the romance. I'm not even against Ken as a romantic hero, but we need to see what Rilla sees beyond the fact that he's tall and handsome (granted, this is a compelling argument for love in most of the romance I read lol). I get that the war is sort of all-consuming but this feels like a key thing to gloss over.

"Mary Vance said bitterly that if Rilla Blythe felt as bad as she had pretended to feel over Jem's going to the front she wouldn't be urging other girls' brothers and friends to go." 100% on Mary's side, this is an unbeatable argument, especially in light of Rilla's defense of Walter.

"And she cannot say it because it would not be true, and she is at her wits' end." Rosemary. Just lie to your 8yo about the starving babies and be done with it. Don't be a weirdo.

"There's something across from us here that has got to be wiped out of the world, that's all—an emanation of evil that would otherwise poison life for ever. It's got to be done, dad, however long it takes, and whatever it costs, and you tell the Glen people this for me. They don't realize yet what it is has broken loose—I didn't when I first joined up. I thought it was fun. Well, it isn't! But I'm in the right place all right—make no mistake about that."

This bit of Jem's letter makes me wildly uncomfortable. Despite the more tempered attitude toward war, this is too close to the rhetoric deployed even today to destroy whole groups of people. Perhaps soldiers need to believe this to do what they do.

I would also like to contrast this with the opening lines of All Quiet on the Western Front—

"This book is to be neither an accusation nor a confession, and least of all an adventure, for death is not an adventure to those who stand face to face with it. It will try simply to tell of a generation of men who, even though they may have escaped its shells, were destroyed by the war."

All Quiet was published 7 years after Rilla, and Erich Maria Remarque served in the Imperial German Army, which likely account for the difference in approach/tone.

I did initially want to do a side-by-side reread of Rilla and All Quiet but I couldn't bring myself to do it. Maybe some day.

Loool not just trenches, also boarding schools. My mom spent the greater part of her youth in one and has a real fear of lice even today.

Nice to know that Ken writes Rilla regularly even if it's mainly about the war. I guess it kinda makes sense given his recent enlistment.

"I would horse-whip him, or bite him, if nothing else would serve." This line is so funny sksfgshj

"He trots about on all fours and carries things in his mouth like a little dog." Another delightful image. Rilla and Jims really make this book.

The throwaway references to Robert Grant always make me laugh. Very "I have a boyfriend! He just goes to another school."

[beanarie]

Writing asks 👀👀👀👀

22, 26, 34 please and thank

including questions from @meibhin @gladdecease @eidetictelekinetic @frogsinflannel and @o0anapher0o thank you for the excuse to ramble ❤️ i'm still working on my other asks it's just that this past week has been really draining. turns out having someone you love in the hospital--even if they're relatively okay--uh, sucks

6: What element of writing do you find comes easily?

dialogue. it's always the first thing that coalesces in my head.

8: Which character(s) do you find easiest to write?

for my current fandom, tommy. his dry humor and history of being a snippy piece of shit really speaks to me.

9: Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write?

athena, i guess? she's "family" as karen said, but she's on the periphery. involving her in bucktommy shenanigans requires threading a needle.

17: A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

sleep sex/somnophilia. i find the concept viscerally upsetting.

19: Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between?

now, they are equal in quality. i've read and written a bunch of au fics. but i gravitate more towards canon compliant, especially when i first jump into a fandom.

22: Do you listen to anything while you write?

if i'm at home, no. when i'm on the train, i put something on to limit distractions. here's my latest playlist

25: Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

yesss i had some outtakes of bucktommy on the road in the temperature of becoming something. i'll go more into that in my director's commentary asks.

26: Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

nothing right now, but i stewed over like a detuned radio for several days. it's really self indulgent.

32: Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less.

tommy also breakup bakes.

34: Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

(Buck): It might be better if I join another house

(Hen): Is that what you want?

(Buck): Not really

(Buck): But I can't go back to whatever that was. No one would talk to me. I felt like I was on fire.

Hen bubbles him for quite a while. Buck finishes his apple and brushes sand from his pant legs. He drinks another cup of peach cider from the jug he got at a farm stand outside the Outer Banks. The sun is strong today, but there's enough of a breeze coming off the water that it doesn't feel overwhelming.

(Hen): I think because we knew your grief would be a lot, we didn't know how to handle it on top of our own. So we didn't even open the door. Then enough time went by that it seemed like you were past the worst of it, and bringing it all up again would just send you and all the rest of us back to the square one.

Buck stares at her words and listens to the waves crashing.

(please i need hen and buck to hash this out so bad. without any explanation it just looks like willful cruelty. also shoutout to the north carolina farm stand with the very addictive peach cider. ah, summer vacation memories)

35: Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

i fuckin love it here so much. not since the early days of elementary fandom have i felt so at home. yeah, there are dickheads in this corner just like there are everywhere else, but there are also so many lovely, hilarious, talented, kind people and idk it's 4:30 am and i've been going through some shit but yeah 🥹

[glytchedmuffins]

Hsr 3.4 SPOILERS!!!!

I have a lot of thoughts about all of 3.4 but rn my main concern is the fate of "Khaslana", because while the end bit animation was really fucking epic and he absolutely deserved that crash out, it makes me wonder:

Is Khaslana dead now?

Like, "Phainon" is gonna be okay, like every other cycle this one will have a brand new one without any memories and no connections to the Destruction.

But the final scene with Khaslana leaves his faith rather ambiguous.

First off, the animation straight up shows him be killed, which could also mean nothing as well as the cycle just reset.

But the biggest thing that makes me question it is these error messages we get right before the animation:

The "failed to load" part is what's getting to me.

Could this be because Nanook's presence fucked up the code but he himself is fine? Or did he become an Emanator, which meant he was no longer bound by the code, since it made him "real"? Or does this mean his code is really gone, as with the Trailblazer there, he no longer had to bear this burden anymore so he could let go?

Tbh, I don't know anymore. It's like how 3.3 ended very ambiguously with Cyrene, and we only learned what that scene meant in 3.4, so will the same happen in 3.5?

We will be entering the new cycle, but unlike Khaslana, who always started around the time Tribios became the first Demigod, we seem to start much later seeing how Cyrene has already been born, probably dropped off some time before Aedes Elysiae was destroyed.

So if Khaslana is alive we'll likely meet the Flamereaver, or maybe even as a different form, as the drive to gather the Coreflames is no longer there because of the Trailblazer taking up the role of "Deliverer".

No matter his fate it will likely end with this cycle, as this cycle's Phainon won't need to take on that burden again.

At least he'd better not or else I will fight someone for not being able to save my baby boy from this endless cycle-

But I digress, I just want to know what his end fate will be: will Khaslana be gone forever and Phainon will live a normal life, or will Phainon still ascend to Emanatorhood/be wrapped up in Destruction but just without the baggage of 402,604,032 Coreflames?

I guess we'll see in the later patches.

[suspiriuums]

The sexual tension between Y/N and nam-gyu is driving me insane, you are so mean for that 🫣 Anyways... I was wondering if maybe we could get some fluff? Like nam-gyu walks in on her crying and trys to comfort her. (Even though hes really bad at it.) Tysm!!

.ᐟ.ᐟ contains. mention of suicidal ideations .ᐟ.ᐟ author's note. i'm glad you're enjoying everything so far! i can definitely do some fluff for u. even if in the end it's not really fluff bc our poor little gyu doesn't know how to be a comforting presence to save his life ASJAKDHJ.

ROOMMATE!NAM-GYU's best efforts still weren't good enough.

You were over it. It had been a long, insufferable week, running on fumes and only living for collapsing onto your bed at the end of the day. And Nam-gyu was no help, asking you everyday if you were cooking dinner, leading you to snap at him and tell him to just order something for himself. Or, god forbid, learn how to cook.

Tonight was your breaking point. You walked in through the door to your apartment, announced your arrival, and nothing. Usually, Nam-gyu would say something like a simple hello to acknowledge your presence.

But the apartment was deadly quiet. You were alone.

Something about the stillness of the lonely air made you want to slump down to the floor. Bricks were tied to your feet and you struggled to breathe.

You couldn't get to your room fast enough. There, you threw your bag down on the ground and flopped first face into your bed. To which you couldn't hold it in anymore, and you began scream-sobbing into your pillow.

You hated your life. You hated your shitty apartment. And your shitty job. And your shitty, loser roommate. And you were so fucking lonely. You didn't have many friends. Your family lived far away. You could only see your therapist once in a blue moon because of the unbelievable wait-times.

If it weren't for your cat, you'd be dead by now.

In the midst of your sobbing, you are startled out of your skin when you hear a knock on your door and you gasp, quickly wiping your tears. "What?" you called out. "Nam-gyu? Is that you?"

The door opened and there he was, Nam-gyu, leaning against your door frame with his arms crossed. He didn't say anything, which just added fuel to your breakdown, and a few drops of hot tears fell down your cheeks once again. You wiped them away, but they kept coming. "What the fuck do you want?" your voice wavered and cracked, blowing away your pathetic attempt at covering your lost composure.

"I can hear you all the way from my room," he responded. "You didn't even announce that you were home, so imagine how I felt when out of fucking nowhere I start to hear some woman crying bloody murder or some shit. So I came to check on you,"

Check on you? As in show concern? Yeah, right. You waved him off, shaking your head.

"Whatever, 'gyu," you choked. "Go check on me from somewhere else. I don't need your bullshit right now,"

You laid back down on your bed and stared at your closet, sniffling and whimpering with Nam-gyu's presence still looming from your doorway. You wanted to scream at him to get out, but you didn't have the energy. You didn't even flinch when you watched Nam-gyu kneel at your bedside, looking at you face-to-face.

You knitted your eyebrows together in confusion, wiping at your runny nose. "What are you doing?" you asked him, voice pathetically small.

Nam-gyu clicked his tongue. "Well, since you're not cooking dinner tonight," he began. "I'm gonna order us some pizza. How does that sound? Would that make you stop crying?"

You sniffled. "Yeah... yeah, I guess,"

Nam-gyu clapped an awkward hand on your shoulder before he left your room, taking out his phone to put in the order.

You decided to lay there until the pizza came. And in a moment of rarity, you two ended up actually eating together.

For a night, you two were normal roommates.

[changingplumbob]

Second Round - Day Ten (BB) 2 of 2

@belsasim, @corrienteallita, @cawthorntales, @hashimasims, @ravingsockmonkey, @pixeldistractions - Sim creators and co-writers

Results based on charisma skill level.

Mariela (1.88)

Dee (2.12)

Kaye (2.36)

Harmony (2.61)

Billie (3.10) - Wins the date

Sarah (4.30) - Bonus points!

Dee: All that fuss for nothing, huh

Mariela: Ooof, I got rocked!

Dee: No jokes to cover the situation?

Mariela: Umm... Not really. I haven't had a date this round so I guess my nerves are just having a moment

Dee: There's still the group challenge, whatever that is. And you always talk to Deanna even if you're not on a date

Mariela: Hmm

Harmony: It was worth a shot and I did make something cute.

Kaye: Maybe I should hang out at GeekCon some more and get some pointers from the cosplayers for next time

Harmony: You looked so lifelike

Kaye: Thanks! I mean there's magic in the bloodline so I had some insider knowledge of how things should look. I think you should be applauded for standing in all that fire though

Harmony: *laughing* I was so worried I'd just fall face first into some of it

Sarah: Whatever happens, you can't fall in love with me *hands you a flower*

Billie: Game reference?

Sarah: Game reference

Billie: I feel really good. I finally won a date with Deanna doing something I really, really enjoyed. I wish I could wear my costume to the cafe!

Sarah: I wonder if we can take our costumes...

Billie: I'll distract them, and you grab

Billie has chosen the cafe for her date this round. It is her first time getting a date with the bachelorette, will things go well?

Deanna: I'm glad you liked the challenge

Billie: It was a lot of fun. I hope there's more artistic challenges in future

Deanna: Do you think you're mostly lucky or unlucky?

Billie: I consider myself pretty fortunate, but probably the biggest thing I need to work on is comparing myself to other people and wanting what they have

Deanna: Jealously can be tricky

Billie: Like at art school there was this girl who got everything, but her art was so derivative! My friends said 'Don't worry, she's on her own journey,' but she was in all my classes! It was hard to look at it from their perspective, but eventually I got my own art show, too

Deanna: Congratulations

Deanna: Can we get deep for a bit? My family believe in the watcher but I know not everyone does. Do you believe in fate, you know, destiny? Or do you think we're all at the mercy of some watcher?

Billie: I do think we're born to be certain things

Deanna: Like callings?

Billie: Exactly. I was probably destined to be an artist from the time I was small. I didn't like stacking my blocks, but I liked organizing them by colour, so I was probably always going to be an artist and not an engineer!

Deanna: *laughs* Definitely a good career choice for you then

Deanna: Say you can live anywhere. Where would you live?

Billie: I love Evergreen Harbour

Deanna: Never wanted to try anywhere else?

Billie: I'm a bit more laid back than cosmopolitan, but I think I'd probably enjoy an urban environment with a thriving art scene, like San Myshuno or Del Sol Valley. Probably. Maybe the traffic would be too much for me

Deanna: *laughs* Devin is always complaining about traffic

Deanna: I have to say I like being in Tartosa because it's close to my family. I could be persuaded to move if it was to somewhere stable, not constant packing and unpacking

Billie: I think Tartosa is beautiful, but the classical art isn't really my style. Don't get me wrong - I appreciate classic art forms, but grittier or more modern style is much more me

Deanna: *smiles* I can see that

Billie: If you couldn't do your robotics work in a place like Evergreen Harbour but wanted to be with me, I could be persuaded to move anywhere. All I need is an easel, right?

Deanna: I'm pretty sure I could build my robots anywhere *smiles*

When everyone is back at the villa it's time to work on their skills. While some challenges are more up to luck, there are some that are influenced a lot by skill. This is the last chance they have to study before the group day challenge, and the next round if they advance.

Today the popular choice appears to be… logic! Harmony, Billie and Sarah all choose to work on it, and wonder what challenge they'll need logic for if they make it to the next round. Dee channels her anger into studying rock climbing, yeah she's still annoyed about her loss the other day. Mariela meanwhile branches out with fitness, feeling like it's a sensible option to cover bases. Kaye decides to move about and work on her nectar making. She does want to be a master maker after all and it's been a while since she crafted.

Devin: First date with Billie then?

Deanna: It was. I'm glad people that didn't get them last round are getting a chance. I don't want to send someone home without having spent any solo time with them you know

Devin: How did you find it?

Deanna: She's such a creative soul, it was great to properly chat

Devin: Any sentiments?

Deanna: *sighs* Not today sadly

As it's the groups last day together before the group challenge, final dates, and commencement ceremony, we again head to the spa. Reece (Deanna's best friend) welcomes everyone and escorts them to the meditation area in the back garden. There he leads a guided meditation

Reece: Close your eyes and become aware of your breathing... picture a place that makes you feel calm. It might be the beach, the woods, behind a beloved screen or in front of one...

Reece: Repeat to yourself after me... whatever happens I am worthy of love and joy

The meditation wraps up and the group gets a shock. Sarah got so deep in the meditation that she... floats? Reece assures them all he's done it to, it's temporary and on the soft ground out here there's nothing to worry about.

After yoga it's time for dinner, grilled by Deanna herself. The group moves to the picnic area.

Deanna: Fruit cobbler! Get your fruit cobbler!

Reece: And you made fun of me for being domesticated

Dee: Dessert for dinner?

Kaye: Sounds good to me *tucks in*

Harmony: It looks nice, thank you Deanna

Deanna: *smiling* You're welcome

Harmony: You sure you don't feel... weird?

Sarah: If I was "floating" and I don't believe I was, I don't feel any different

Mariela: You were 100% floating. High in the sky. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! It's Sarah

Billie: I always love how colourful berries are

Kaye: The advice is to "eat the rainbow"

Deanna: We talking skittles or vegetables?

When the food is finished the group get to experience the main reason for the spa trip - a chance to relax and let go of stress or tension from the competition.

Everyone gets a face mask! Some get massages, some steam in the spa and other relax in the massage chairs. Autonomy is set to full and Deanna always starts in the massage chairs, since those relaxing in the spa normally start chatting pretty quickly.

For some reason I can't explain Sarah's hair changes when she's in the sauna... pretty sure it's temporary? Once Harmony and Dee are finished in the massage chairs they strike up a conversation about the latest episodes of The Adventures of Skunkbert that Dee and Kaye have watched.

It would appear that the spa has been breached today, with over eager fans taking the chance to talk to contestants and Deanna (I cropped out a sim interrupting Mariela as she was trying to relax).

Following her massage Billie is still deep in reflection on her date today and doesn't seek anyone's company. There is company upstairs though as Deanna talks to Dee and Harmony.

Dee: I'm telling you, season one episode five, hilarious

Harmony: *smiling* It's so nice to hear that

Deanna: I'd love to watch some but I don't have a lot of free time at the moment. I'm filming every day

Dee: No wonder you make them take us to the spa

While Sarah fights off sleep in the sauna, Kaye goes in and chats to Mariela.

Kaye: I think you're really good at diffusing awkward situations

Mariela: Thanks! I'm only so good at that because I specialise in making awkward situation though...

Kaye: *chuckles* We have to hang out in the city sometime

Harmony: Are you feeling better now?

Dee: For sure. I just get worked up too much but I'm mellowed now

[princessofghosts-posts]

Hey, since you’re an Italian PJO Nico Di Angelo fan, you’ve probably read ‘Un Natale Mezzosangue’, right? What’s your opinion on it?

My mind totally cancelled it because of how strange it was. I had to blink twice and ask myself why the title was in italian before remembering and going "Ah. That-",that's how bad it was for me.

So,first off first,I wasn't aware when he wrote it and since I don't buy books outside of the main timeline I had to read it in english online (I couldn't find the original version so I went for the translation). But it's wild that it got published in one of our most famous newspapers,sometimes I still ask myself how it was even possible. It also surprised me that Riordan was able to write a whole short story in italian,since it's a very difficult language to understand. We have a lot of verbs and phraseologies that even native speakers struggle with,and I know he is fluent in it and it wasn't that long but it's still impressive.

Anyway,I don't really understand the timeline with this one. It was published in 2020,a couple of days before Christmas (because it's a Christmas special of course),but I also remember that in the same year,a couple of months before,he completed TOA,so it must have been after the serie ended. If it's canon,of course. But the timeline is screwed anyway because the whole short story was set during COVID-19,while from TLT we can assume the whole story was set during the early years of 2000. Nothing new anyway,since we never specified a timeline and Riordan mixed everything up like always. Guess this happens when you don't establish a real timeline.

The plot? Uncalled for. I'm sorry but going to Florence just to find a gift for Annabeth,while also having Nico helping you? Naaah. I think it was a bit overkill,but maybe it's just me. Percy is the type of guy that wants the best for his girlfriend,and he did say that he thought they were going somewhere else,but going all out (and in other continents too apparently) for a gift that you can find in the US in whatever place you want? Idk. Again,maybe it's just me. Besides,Nico here literally hijacked the original plan.

The most important thing of the whole short story is the information it gave us about their biology: demigds cannot get sick from COVID-19 but they can still spread it. Which is interesting because it was a virus,so this means that demigods are immune to illnesses (as in,even if they are infected they don't feel it and are completely fine) but can still carry them around and pass them to mortals.

What I didn't like is that Percy was fine with shadow traveling before,but now he doesn't like it?? In TLO,in the chapter "My cookies get scorched" he described the experience as the following:

"I don't recommend shadow travel if you're scared of:

a) The dark

b) Cold shivers up your spine

c) Strange noises

d) Going so fast you feel like your face is peeling off

In other words,I thought it was awesome".

But in this short story it's:"he had never liked shadow-travelling". I'm sorry but what was I even reading at this point? Percy was one of the few people that didn't find shadow-travelling creepy at the start,and actually enjoyed it,only to have that trait completely removed??? This is just another reason for Riordan to reread his books or have someone do it for him and point him to any mistakes.

A good thing is that it got hinted that Nico actually spent a bit of time in Florence (even if it's off-screen),otherwise he wouldn't have known where to take Percy,and I'm happy about it. One of my major complaints about HoO is how we never got to see his nationality explored more,especially with the trip to Venice and how Europe (and Italy) got treated as this extremely hardcore survival land. I'm glad to see that he is still in touch with his heritage and is visiting Italy.

Another nonsense in this short story is Charu. I swear I had to reread that part multiple times,and I had to find another translation to make sure I was actually reading it right and there wasn't a mistake,and in fact it was real. Listen,I love how many pantheons Riordan tries to involve in his universe,but the etruscan gods too??? Isn't it a bit too much,especially because there are so many gods already and other than the Greek Pantheon (and a bit of the roman),every other Pantheon is kinda forgotten?? Why add another one??

It makes a bit sense historical speaking,because the Etruscans lived in Tuscany. The region was called "Etruria" at the start,but then it got changed to "Tuscia" because the Romans called the Etruscans "Tusci" and in the end it became "Tuscany" thanks to the roman's influence (the name derives from Latin btw). The thing is,the change started happening in the III century B.C. Italy was (and still is) extremely influenced by both Greece and the Roman Empire,so it's impossible for an Etruscan god to still be around,especially if there aren't any worshipers or believers. Well,I guess that Nico count as one now,but all the centuries before? Especially during the Roman Empire? How did bro survive to tell the story??

Only thing I liked is that he is connected to the Underworld and he and Nico already knew each other because of that connection. If Riordan wants to have a proper crossover,we know what character he needs to use (he will still continue to use Percy even if Nico is right there and can make it possible without any problems. Can you imagine Nico and Anubis in the same room? Because I can). Also,Dante? Really? That one was funny but if we take into consideration the historical era,and the fact that he wrote the Divine Comedy based on Christianity and Catholic theology,then it doesn't make any sense.

Also,why would an ancient god ask about Christmas?? And Percy's answer?? Not that it wasn't bad but I felt like the whole conversation was kinda...idk,useless? Usually when gods ask him some questions there is always something going on,but here is just that.

"Why would I celebrate Christmas?"

"Idk,it's for everyone and we need to be vigilant and optimistic"

"Good answer".

That's basically it. But I think it was more about what was happening with COVID-19 a time,especially with the pandemic and the increasing deaths. Gotta give people hopes in some ways.

Anyway,the gift itself is just a golden bracelet with a lot of keys that Percy could have found in whatever jewelry store he visited. But since it was made by a god,Charu hinted that the keys can open and solve a lot of problems,so I'm guessing they are going to help Annbeth in the future (if it's canon).

I like how they wished each other a merry christmas (given the last one they had together–) but I also don't like the very end,because what do you mean Nico called Percy "Seaweed brain"? I had to double check that part multiple times (again) because,what the hell? I'm sorry,even if now they are a bit closer than before,Nico would never. I refuse to believe that he even said that.

It felt like Riordan tried to write their dynamic forgetting about all the things that happened before. Last time they properly saw each other was when Nico told him he had a crush on him,and Percy was extremely confused (idk if they meet again at the end of TOA since in THO Nico was K.O. and Percy was trying to save the day),so they should be at least a bit awkward with each other. Especially with how intense things between them normally are,even without the factor crush involved. But nope. W the character and dynamic developments for those two,apparently they can still be close friends even after Percy realized he was shitty to Nico in HoH and without having Nico feeling awkward about his crush reveal (not to talk about all the other things-).

Anyway,the whole thing was a fever dream that I often forget happened (thanks to my brain for that) and that I also don't like aside for a few things. This short story is just another example of the inconsistency in Riordan's writing and the necessity he has to go and reread his books. At this point bro will write everything without even checking if it's true or not. If Nico one day ends up telling how much he liked Albania I won't be surprised. The whole thing was honestly unnecessary,especially with the inclusion of another pantheon (fortunately is only just a god and is connected to the Underworld) but maybe I'm more defensive because it's my culture.

[etvdes]

grey can see her thinking, and for as much as they would give anything to know what she’s thinking about, they don’t think they can actually handle it if they did. when was the last time they had been able to handle anything? there’s something about the way she says she wants to know that feels like it douses them in cold water. because they can’t really wrap their mind around why ANYONE would want to know, despite themself. but you can’t unring a bell, and there was something vaguely comforting about finally having all of it in the space between them. “i was still so new to sobriety when we first got together too, it felt like telling anyone would put too much pressure on it.” they shrug, “hey my last time in rehab was less than 90 days ago wanna go out with me? isn’t exactly good first date conversation.” once again, grey knows somewhere in the back of their mind that too anyone else the things they were saying were all independently horrifying. but they talked about it like it was as boring as the number of cracks in the sidewalk. acknowledging the amount of time they had been clean felt so uncomfortable still, but their chest burned with some combination of shame and pride when she did it. it felt like maybe it was more of achievement then they gave it credit for. they’re eyes cast down as they discuss the crushing weight of time, and they’re glad for the ease with which she moves on. grey often felt the world pressing down on them, weight of the lives they left behind constantly reminding them of all they’ve done wrong. time moved on, even though there were people that they know didn’t. they hate to think about how a place they loved so much chewed them up and spit them out like nothing. they wish they could explain better what it felt like, but at the same time they’re not sure it matters. and it feels kind of hopeless to say that the best feeling in the world— the one you can never recreate— is the one that you get when you try heroin the first time. because sure, it feels so good. but at what point was chasing that ruining any chance for anything else to feel good? and yeah, they know that’s one of the core tenants of getting clean in the first place. it’s something everyone says in detox and again in rehab and reiterates every week at NA. but that still doesn’t make it feel any less overwhelming. “yeah i guess it’s a lot easier to manage now then it was at the beginning…” they trail off, letting their thoughts take them for an instant. because it feels easier some days and harder on others, but they’ll be damned if they screw up their fresh start the way they screwed up their life in baltimore. when she acknowledges that this information could’ve changed things, they nod knowingly. it was one of the many things they had always been worried about. “i guess i’ve never really given anyone a chance to do anything that made me feel—“ they can’t put their finger on the feeling. they didn’t want pity, they didn’t want judgement, and they didn’t want to be treated like they were made of glass. and despite it all, they never trusted anyone not to do that. “weird.” is the best they can do to name it, even though they know it’s not right. “i’m not FRAGILE, y’know? i’m not gonna break–“ and maybe at the beginning they were, but at this point they’ve tried so hard to prove to themself that this really is the LAST time. there is no going back to the old habits, no turning back and ruining all their progress. at least, they don’t want to believe that there is, no more second chances. they shift their focus back down to her, desperately wishing they could just have what they used to, before all the pressure got to be too much and they didn’t know how to handle it. and they knew they weren’t honest about this HUGE part of their life, something that probably made it hard to trust them going forward. but they never expected the secret to get this out of control. they never expected to get to a point where they thought it had been too long to just tell her. and maybe that was part of the problem.

they wanted her love so BADLY that they made their shame and embarrassment hers, they let their fears and heart broken disappointment about their own choices push them apart. and maybe that was why this was all so hard. because they never gave her the chance to prove them wrong, too afraid of being proven right. their heart aches when she tells them she misses them, and they can’t help the way they respond. it feels almost instantaneous. “i miss you too.” there’s so much behind it— so much love, so much fear— but it’s another one of the things they need to trust will be better if they say it, instead of running and hiding from their feelings. they didn’t expect her to speak to such a core part of them, but when she explains that she misses them more when they’re together, it feels like being seen for who they really are. “i get it.” they nod, “feels like all the things i’ve been trying so hard not to feel start breaking,” they explain, “because i can’t figure myself out without you– i don’t want to be without you– but i can’t have what i want either.” they’re not sure if that’s the way that she feels, but in the pursuit of honesty, they’re trying to put their own feelings into words. “it’s not stupid.” they respond to her almost as quick as she says it, and if she studied their face she would see just how genuinely they meant it. “grief sucks.” they add, and they want to ask, to beg, to plead at the foot of any god that will listen to help her give them another chance. but that’s so much pressure, and they’re not willing to put that on her. so instead, they settle for a simple “i can give you a different one?”

rowan sits and she takes it in. and she takes it in some more. it is a lot for her to wrap her mind around and it’s not really something that she thinks they’ll fully cover in an afternoon. she has questions now and she’ll probably have even more later but she also knows grey might not always be feeling as open as they are right now. if they’re willing to info-dump the cliff notes of their life on her then she just has to take it in. try and make sense of how it’s brought them to right here and now, with her. “n-no, it’s… i want to know.” doesn’t say that it isn’t a lot because they would be a lie. she just also doesn’t want to say anything to them that would suggest that she can’t take it. it feels a lot to rowan like they both need this honesty. being part of a select few people who know about more than the surface level things with grey is apparently an exclusive club that she finds herself a member of. no need to ask the wrong question and get herself booted out. “ten months, though? that’s something. that’s almost a year. though it’s uh… probably better just thinking about taking each day as it comes, huh?” sometimes the bigger end goals can feel like a crushing pressure and she doesn’t want her comment to come across that way. which is why she finds it easy enough to move on. “maybe better isn’t the right way to put it though, you know? maybe it doesn’t get better exactly but it gets easier to manage.” is anyone ever really cured from addiction? rowan doesn’t know much about it but she thinks to suggest that someone one day just won’t have it seems… untrue. it’ll always be there. a part of their life changed forever. it’ll shape them into who they are now. and who grey is now is someone that’s trying and that deserves to be acknowledged. the fact they love her weighs heavy on her chest if only for the fact it fills her with a twisted sort of hope. hope she isn’t sure she should have. “i guess it might’ve changed things… if i found out when we were together.” she doesn’t mean it would’ve broken them up or that it’s not something they couldn’t move forward from, she just feels like it could’ve set a different tone to things. rowan is barely coping with their breakdown today as someone who no longer has any ties to them — her empathetic little heart might not be able to take her partner collapsing around her. “oh — uh,” she glances down at herself. at the reason they’re even here right now. who knew such a choice would’ve brought her such honesty? “i miss you.” it’s the short, easy version of things. the one that she lets herself sneak a glance at them for before promptly looking away again. “i miss us. i knew you’d be here today and i guess i just miss you a little bit more when you’re around.” it maybe doesn’t make much sense considering they’re right there and she can see them but it’s everything else that she misses. she can’t just go grab their hand because she feels like it, or tug them down to her height so that she can kiss them just because. it’s all the things rowan itches to do when she’s dating anyone and ignoring that sort of muscle memory aches. “i think i thought it would make me feel a bit closer to you or something. i don’t know that it does. it barely even smells like you anymore.” a fact that makes her pull a bit of a face. if nothing else thankfully they’re close enough now that it’s something she can capitalise on. “just stupid shit, really.” or it feels like it knowing what she does now. they’re dealing with everything and she’s moping about an ended relationship.

[malachitezmeyka]

I always get so unfathomably angry and upset whenever I see posts like “drawing and writing should be FUN! Keep creating because it’s FUN to do so!! It’s not cringe if you’re having FUN while doing it!!! FUN is the most important thing when it comes to creating, as long as you’re having FUN nothing else matters!!!! Please don’t quit what brings you so much JOY!!!!!” because as someone who has never experienced fun or joy or anything but frustration while creating, it just feels like those posts are rubbing salt in the wound. On, you didn’t have your capacity for happiness absolutely destroyed by trauma and self hatred? Should we tell everyone?? Should we throw you a fucking party??? Should we shout it from the rooftops so everyone knows how fucking happy you are???? SHOULD WE?????

[icewindandboringhorror]

At what temperature INDOORS (not outdoor weather) do you start to become noticeably uncomfortable (sweaty, heavy, don't feel like doing anything, etc.) and begin trying to cool off yourself or your environment?

(Like, at what point do you start putting out fans, turning on the AC, getting ice water, etc. because the indoor room temperature has gotten too high for you?)

It's starting to get warmer weather where I live, so I was thinking about it/curious how this might vary :0

(sorry if the celsius conversions aren't entirely accurate, I just used a website to look them up/am not familiar with measuring things that way myself lol)

[yarrowleef-babbles]

been hearing rumors that the "i'm always straight" lines may have been cut from the GN and IF that is true, I expect everyone will be super mad about that--and ngl i'd mourn the loss of it too because it has become iconic to me

But. i can't believe i'm playing devils advocate for this, BUT it is not entirely unreasonable for an adaptation of this work to decide it does not want to reference Ronan's sexuality yet......coming to terms with his sexuality is (one) part of his arc in the 2nd book. Adam Parrish being ~the 2nd secret he doesn't want to admit to himself~ , Ronan's catholic guilt homoerotic nightmares and the like, all characterize his sexuality as something he might vaguely be aware of but seriously struggles to openly admit. I don't think he even uses the word gay or any other word to describe himself in the whole series? (unless I'm forgetting something?)

So, idk, it's not unreasonable to want the (hypothetical) audience to also not be aware of it until Ronan is forced to directly grapple with his identity next book.

i think this is one of those things that has become very dear to the fandom over time, but if i look at it objectively without my feelings, i just.....i do understand why someone could conceivably decide that this off-handed bitchy "he's gay btw" joke is not of dire importance for the sanctity of the story 😭 in the 'pros don't outweigh the cons' sort of way....