#idk you guys.... š
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sometimes... sometimes i think about how other chenford fans view me and i just ā
#*and this is icarly!#*bpd tag#idk you guys.... š#i just get this queasy feeling sometimes... like...#i hope i'm not too annoying or come off as rude or anything....#and i'm sorry if i've done anything to cast myself in any negative way#hmm.... the head is spinning tonight#and not in the normal weewoo shows/ships kind of way#the rookie#chenford
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some epilogue vibes (an excuse to draw some hugs. and my durge so many times)
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#wyll#karlach#astarion#shadowheart#lae'zel#minsc#jaheira#durge#oc: noon#anyway as said attempting to tag late game stuff more just in case#spoilers in the tags also bc i'm gonna ramble lol ->#i'mmšhaving played embrace durge for most of the game all the sweetness punched me in the face (affectionate) like girllllll lolšš<3#tho let wyll be hugged damnit >:(#(i wonder if they added wyll hug in the new patch? doubts i don't trust like that but huge if they did)#also idk why minsc got that ending lmao. i didn't even know there were diff outcomes just found out looking for his ref for this pic LOL#i helped nine fingers and the guild helped in the endfight?? idk what happened but godspeed my guy#also loved jaheira's ''good to see you please for the love of gods remember to never have kids''#minsc in the bg: ''i'm getting executed tomorrowšÆšŖ''#also i didn't even know why karlach glowed blue then looked it up like ohššš„ŗ ohhhhh
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cringe ass family ā¤
#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#valyrianscrolls#tywin lannister#joanna lannister#cersei lannister#jaime lannister#tyrion lannister#joffrey baratheon#myrcella baratheon#tommen baratheon#2 many of them......8 whole guys...#one day I'll draw a proper family portrait but for now all you get is floating heads. at least this time they have shoulders#um tywin looks weird idk whats wrong with him. like physically i mean. think i made his eyes too big#ive decided to give all of them slay earrings ā¤ except i couldnt figure out what 2 give tommen so he doesnt have them š#he does have his ears pierced tho ā maybe he like just got it done bc hes a baby#im aware thats not how that hat works btw ik the hair's not supposed 2 be out. idgaf#my art
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Just rewatched centaurworld with my sister, is this anything?
#i don't wanna hear any complaints about mistakes guys cause trust me i already know I don't need to be told š#ANYWAY this line from the general's battle song is literally SO good it gives me chills every single time š#if you haven't watched centaurworld RUN to Netflix (or y'know.. your pirate ship)#savor that first watch through cause you won't get it back š#cole's art#gravity falls#art#grunkle stan#stanley pines#grunkle ford#ford pines#stangst#right?#idk#guys ever since i started doing those comics I can't stop just coloring sketches with grayscale#this was going to be a fully line arted piece but then i thought about just taking it easy and.... it was greyscaled before my eyes š
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Viva for my Swap AU ^_^
also adding the ref here for her + doodles :3
rambling / infodumping under the cut again !!
iāve been meaning to get to viva for awhile tbh, iāve just been distracted with a lot of stuff :ā) her backstory / separation is about the same, but this time she doesnāt have clay to be the serious side of running hole-n-fun. she still has friends obviously (thereās 2 main ones who i plan to draw soon ^_^) but she kinda ends up more serious than she is in canon :P i was thinking of drawing how she got captured exactly, but iāll probably save that for a later time. with her, i want to eventually focus more on her life as a solo leader ;3
#dreamworks trolls#trolls band together#trolls#trolls swap au#trolls au#trolls viva#poppy trolls#branch trolls#floyd trolls#idk what else to add to these#you guys can thank ohposhers for this btw#i think imma introduce you guys to rosiepuff soon also#GUH i have so much to explain in this au.. all i wanted was broppy š
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2am post jumpscare
#found this and wanted to clean it up rq lol#these guys donāt deserve it āļøš#well probably idk#idk anything abt dream just that ppl either make him super effeminate or a horrible person a lot#<- tapping on the door of sans peoples club#do you guys even like him or#/j#except for sunny he seems nice :*)#but man when it comes to the others it 100% feels like āwell this story/fic/comic needs a villain soooā#like. Iām not a shooter for sf sans at all but like. ppl donāt even bother making him a sans most of the time itās like they just turn him#into some anime villain or smth. what to hell#and do NOT even get me started on uf Papyrus Chara and Flowey I will chew through concrete#snow and hail#undertale#underfell#swapfell#undertale dream#is his AU just called dreamtale I genuinely donāt know#I think so#underfell papyrus#flowey#chara#undertale chara#undertale flowey#swapfell sans#god I am NOT used to tagging so many characters#bye
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the world's most underqualified daycare team šš«¶
i fear theyre cooked.
ignore moon and monday being in almost the same pose i noticed it too late to change it.
original au post w og refs and au explaination
my sun and moon designs w more 'detail elaboration' (not sdgo related post, just them in general)
i did want to make sun and moon's designs in sdgo different than my general personal designs that i use in my self insert au for easier differentiation for other people (i can tell them apart pretty easiy because i portray them personality-wise pretty differently in both aus), but . im too attached . to my current designs um š /silly their designs r basically the same i just wanted to draw them in this lineup w monday/yn/mc/whathaveyou so they didnt look . sad and lonely. lol . theyve already got enough of that "sad and lonely" shit going on in the storyline ā¤ļø
i probably shouldve written a bit more on the image itself but i didnt . want to crowd it.
closeups and a bit ....more..... yapping (not too much, but might interest some? maybe?) under cut š + their all eye variations put onto their actual drawn faces, for funsies ^_^
moon doesnt get a security mode until later into the timeline ^_^ it's (spoilers i guess) actually how the virus gets passed onto him and sun! when his security mode gets added the virus comes with it.
moon's by far got the most eye variations god damn (i love him)
#salmon scribbles#my art#superstar daycare grand opening#dca community#dca fandom#dca au#sundrop#moondrop#sun fnaf#moon fnaf#none of them know what theyre doing and none of them are legally qualified for this#'where did the green on sun come from. why' why NOT. riddle me this batman#riddle me this buttman /ref š¤#also if you have any thoughts or questions dont be shy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love talking abt my litle guys abd my little au !!!!!!!!!#like always though just know its still subject to change at the moment#not for much longer though hopefully!!!#i dont know what to yap abt in the tags today ...... tragedy..........#how am i supposed to annoy people now šš#annoy people in ways other than my copious amounts of dcaposting#you knew what you were getting into when you followed me o777#could you call this a soft relaunch? idk#ignore me i have 0 idea what im yapping abt now#i just got home from work i literally finished this piece on my lunch break š#the blorbo grind never stops
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Tokyo revengers groupchat
Warnings: swearing, suggestive, mommy issues, mentions of deceased mothers, brother issues (akashi's), mentions of physical abuse, mentions of suicide, depending on what kind of person you are, this might be kinda dark
Side note: i think i may be projecting too many of my headcanons on these people so i apologize for mischaracterizationsšš
Desc: it's Shinichiro's birthday!! (sneaking in the fact that it's also mine and i'm 19 todayš)
Izana: happy birthday Shinichiro
Izana: everyone's gonna say the same thing so i don't think there's a need for an influx of happy birthday messages
Izana: just dm, to prevent a pointless conversation
Shinichiro: aw thanks Izanašā¤
Mikey: HAPPY BIRTHDAY
Mikey: ANOTHER YEAR OF BEING A VIRGINšš„
Baji: you're such a loser man
Baji: with all due respect and no offense of course
Baji: happy birthday tho
Mitsuya: aren't you a virgin, Mikey?
Mistuya: a bit hypocritical
Mitsuya: happy birthday Shinichiro-san
Mikey: i had sex once, and meh
Mikey: 5/10
Mikey: being confronted with someone's dick and balls was crazy
Mikey: and i have mommy issues so i don't think it's a good idea for me to sleep with a woman
Mikey: but i would like to lay on one's chest as they sing me to sleep
Baji: what does that have to do with anything
Draken: no one asked you for any of that information, just so you know
Mikey: your mom asked me
Mikey: oh, sorryš
Mikey: they wasn't even part of the joke. i'm genuinely apologizingš
Emma: Mikey!
Emma: you know that's a sensitive subject š
Draken: not really, to be honest
Senju: why's it a sensitive subject
Emma: his mother left him
Senju: ...
Senju: Emma why would you tell me that
Mitsuya: i think we should word this differently or not talk about it, maybe
Mikey: Mitsuya's right, as always (boring š)
Mikey: but Emmaā ļø?
Senju: yours left too girl
Emma: well i know that, so i'd be sad if someone made a joke about it
Emma: and so did yoursš¤Ø?
Senju: death is different. your mom CHOSE to leave you
Senju: skill issue
Senju: was that too far? maybe
Draken: guys
Chifuyu: ok guys let's calm down
Emma: of course a person with a mother would say that š
Chifuyu: ...sorry
Emma: just jokes Fuyuš
Baji: don't apologize Chifuyu, not our fault we have mom's
Baji: suck it, losers
Mikey: i really didn't mean to start all this, my bad
Draken: it's not a big dealš
Draken: and Shinichiro-san, happy birthday, but you're still a virgin?
Draken: i'm not judging or anything. i just find it impressive
Draken: all the other stuff is overrated
Emma: š¤Ø
Emma: we'll talk about that later
Emma: are you actively practising abstinence?
Emma: i couldn't
Emma: not with Ken-chan around, at leastš
Draken: dude
Draken: your entire family is here
Emma: don't call me dudeā¹ļø
Draken: okay
Draken: babe
Draken: your entire family is here
Emma: so?? they know we have sex
Emma: how else would we try to have a kid?
Draken: bro...
Mikey: KEN-CHIN KILL YOURSELFā¹ļøš
Izana: Emma was underage when you got together
Izana: something to think about, Draken
Draken: i was too???
Takeomi: who the hell are you
Draken: me?
Takeomi: obviously not you
Takeomi: "Izana"
Takeomi: who is that
Shinichiro: this is Izana, Omi
Takeomi: i fucking know that Shinichiro
Takeomi: why are you all so stupid
Baji: why are you brining your sour mood here
Baji: go die
Baji: no offense
Mitsuya: you can't keep saying bad things then saying no offense
Mitsuya: it literally doesn't mean anything
Shinichiro: i said i had another little brother remember?
Shinichiro: before Emma was a Sano, she was a Kurokawa. this is Izana Kurokawa
Takeomi: your dad was a man whore. respect
Shinichiro: dude, ew?
Izana: technically i'm no ones sibling because my mom lied to your guys' dad about being my father so i'm actually not related to any of you. not really supposed to be here
Mikey: dude give that up. we don't care š
Izana: i was just clarifying
Emma: Izana-nii you know it makes Shin sad when you say thatā¹ļø
Izana: i was stating facts, but alright
Haruchiyo: happy birthday Shinichiro
Baji: you never speak on this group but oh, let the topic be about Mikey
Baji: all of the sudden it's a yappathon
Baji: "i wish Mikey would stick it in!"
Haruchiyo: I'VE NEVER SAID THAT
Haruchiyo: and i'm speaking now, aren't iš
Mikey: Baji leave Haruchiyo alone
Mikey: you're the one always scaring him awayšš
Mikey: hi Haruš
Haruchiyo: hi Mikey š
Kazutora: happy birthday Shinichiro-san
Kazutora: um, sorry about... the incident
Mikey: (i told you not to talk about that in front of people, Toraš)
Draken: PUTTING A SENTENCE IN BRACKETS DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE WHISPERING
Draken: STOP DOING THIS
Senju: what incident
Kazutora: uh
Kazutora: almost killing him
Shinichiro: buddy, i know you didn't mean to do that. it's all good
Kazutora: no, i fully intended to kill a person
Kazutora: it just wasn't meant to be you
Kazutora: and for that i apologize
Shinichiro: oh...
Shinichiro: well at least you don't have those murderous thoughts anymore, right? let's dwell on the positive š
Kazutora: i do have those thoughts
Baji: you don't always have to tell the truth man
Mikey: dudeā ļø
Kazutora: but they're about my father, mostly
Kazutora: i look exactly like him, so looking in the mirror is hard sometimes
Kazutora: i'm not allowed to kill myself, but killing him would be close enough
Kazutora: but i can't. because of the law
Draken: dude, are you okay? do we need to talk again
Draken: this is concerning
Kazutora: words cannot help me, Draken
Kazutora: anyway, have a good birthday, Shinichiro-san
Kazutora: i'm glad you didn't die by my hands
Shinichiro: ...
Shinichiro: i'm not really sure what to say
Senju: i love his thought process
Senju: (what the hell is wrong with this guy)
Draken: we can see the text inside the brackets š
Senju: fine
Senju: what the hell is wrong with this guyš
Senju: you were the one who put Shin in a coma??
Senju: the power or friendship really carries this group's dynamic because if it were me, Kazutora would never see the light of dayšš
Senju: it helps that you're handsome
Kazutora: thank you. i'm sorry
Senju: you're welcome. you are forgiven
Baji: maybe let's change the topic
Senju: what's wrong with him?
Senju: no offense
Emma: his father used to beat him
Senju: Emma!
Senju: you can't be telling people this š
Emma: STOP ASKING ME THEN
Emma: there's no malice!! i'm just telling you what happened!!
Inupi: happy birthday Shinichiro
Inupi: my sister has agreed to go on a date with you
Inupi: i see you as a really good guy so if you fuck this up, i'd have to kill you
Shinichiro: AKANE-SAN?
Shinichiro: she's too pretty for me
Shinichiro: ok um, please give me her number, Seishu
Shinichiro: thank you
Shinichiro: let's speak privately yeah?
Mikey: Inupi, this is the first time in your life you've ever been useful
Mikey: i'm impressed
Inupi: kill yourself
Mikey: Koko doesn't love you backšš„š
Inupi: Takemitchy is married to a woman
Draken: break it up
Draken: and Koko does love him back, he's just fighting heteronormativity and internalized homophobia
Emma: ?
Draken: i'll tell you about it later
Emma: š¤
Inupi: you will not
Koko: i am in this group, you know?
Koko: happy birthday Shinichiro
Koko: also Inupi, aren't we dating?
Inupi: huh
Koko: are we not dating?
Inupi: i mean, i wasn't aware of it
Inupi: but okay
Inupi: you didn't ask me
Koko: well, we act like we're dating so i thought we were
Inupi: okay
Draken: Koko you can do better than that
Draken: this is a terrible confession
Draken: i did not sit through hours of Inupi's yearning for this
Draken: do better
Koko: okay...
Koko: meet me at my place?
Inupi: ...
Inupi: okay
Draken: š
Izana: can't anyone solve their private matters, PRIVATELY?
Mikey: dammit
Draken: what?
Mikey: i don't like when he's happy
Mikey: i need to ruin this for him somehow
Izana: Inupi fucking sucks
Mikey: he's the worst
Mikey: i regret changing the timeline for his sake
Mikey: should've left him to burn
Baji: what?
Mikey: nothing
Baji: this was about everything, except Shinichiro's birthday ā ļø
Shinichiro: to be honest? i couldn't ask for more
Shinichiro: my family being happy is the best present i could ask for
Shinichiro: i really love you guys
Izana: thanks
Mikey: BOOOOOOOOO
Mikey: too sappy, i'm out
Baji: that was so cornyš
Baji: (we love you too)
Emma: Shini-niišā¤
Senju: Takeomi, take notes
Senju: i still don't get how you guys are friends considering the personality difference
Senju: Shin is so kind and lovable and amazing and sweet (and hot lwky)
Emma: ewš
Senju: you um, you smoke, and you um
Senju: yeah i got nothing
Senju: still love you though!
Haruchiyo: he's ugly and abusive
Takeomi: says the dick sucker
Takeomi: i'm abusive because of the way you are by the way
Takeomi: besides, i've regrettably, never lay a hand on you
Baji: here we go again
Haruchiyo: in another life, i've killed you with my bare hands
Takeomi: do you seriously think you could beat me in a fight
Haruchiyo: i'll die trying
Shinichiro: okay guys um let's please not
Shinichiro: Omi stop being a dick š
Shinichiro: Haru, sorry for Omi being a dick
Senju: ā¹ļø
Senju: we love you too, Shin
Draken: uhm i don't know if it's appropriate for me to say? but i love you too Shinichiro, i guess
Draken: this is a little awkward now
Kazutora: should i say it?
Baji: no, Tora
Kazutora: ok
#tokyo revengers#tokyo revengers manga#tokrev#tokyo revengers groupchat#tokyo revengers smau#tokyo revengers texts#sano manjiro/mikey#ryuguji ken/draken#mitsuya takashi#baji keisuke#matsuno chifuyu#kurokawa izana#sano emma#sano shinichiro#akashi takeomi#akashi senju#sanzu haruchiyo#seishu inui#hajime kokonoi#kokonui#you guys already know that all my gc's are the same thing but to the left so idk what to say about repetitiveness anymoreš#btw i usually project my own trauma's on here so if i'm making fun of a sensitive topic it's bcs it's related to me in some way!#i'm not being offensive for the sake of itš#sorry for the lack of takemitchy#i just don't know how to characterize him properlyš#maitake#drakemma
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i canāt really explain this properly but suguru is a āyouāre mine, and iām yoursā kinda guy while satoru is just āiām yoursāā¦.. do u get what iām saying.
#i see suguru as being a lot more possessive than satoruā¦.. more jealous too#sugu is confident and comfortable and also very intent on being a good and healthy partner but.#i think he gets insecure sometimesā¦ bouts of self doubt#and heās also just . a little possessive by nature yk?#heās yours but youāre also His#i donāt really see gojo like that thoughā¦.#he wants to be yours very badly#but heās not especially possessiveā¦? heās the kinda guy whoād be happy loving you the rest of his life even if you never reciprocrate#i think#idk i just love them šš#ari noises ā©
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Her kisses were all-consuming and he felt his heart surrendering to her with every gentle nip, losing himself in the feeling of her. Her soft body pressing tightly against him, her breathy moans, the soft hair at the nape of her neck, her taste.
When Eloise finally pulled away from him, breathing heavily as their foreheads pressed together and their eyes locked, Sebastian was dazed and content and...happy. Merlin, he was so happy. Her cheeks were bright pink, and her lips were swollen and red and smiling up at him. His breath caught in his throat - he didn't think he had ever seen anything so beautiful as Eloise in that moment. Sebastian knew that he was grinning like a fool but he didn't care.
Happiness was bubbling up in his body and he was leaning down to kiss her again because it would never be enough and -
She started coughing.
Eloise abruptly pulled away from him, covering her mouth with her sleeve as she doubled over. A terrible, horrible, familiar wracking cough that Sebastian never thought he would hear again.
When she pulled her sleeve away from her mouth, there were little flecks of blood.
They both looked at each other in horror.
"Eloise..." he started, his voice cracking. The balloon of happiness that had filled him burst and he felt himself crashing back to the grim reality that had been his life for too long. Arms hanging limply at his sides. When his voice came out again, it was a whisper. He could barely choke the words out.
"...what did you do?"
their first kissššš
#sorry guys I canāt help but be an evil gremlinš«”šš#idk if Iāve drawn them kissing before but this was fun!!!!š„¹ so Iāll do it againššš#do you like when I add these little excerpts from my writing??#alsoš«#I was thinking of rewriting my fic from the beginning is that likeā¦okay? normal? something people do????#it was the first thing Iāve ever written and Iām just pantsing the whole thing#I like the plot and basically all of it SO MUCHš«#but I feel like my writingās improved since I started and I have a better idea of who Eloise is#so I want to rewrite and tweak things a bit so itās BETTER#idkš«š« maybe Iāll just keep going forward with my disasterš#anyways hope you enjoyed this KISSššššššš„¹š„¹š„¹#šš#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy fanart#hphl#hogwarts legacy mc#hogwarts legacy oc#sebastian sallow#eloise babbit#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow fanart
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The curse of being a Midst fan is not knowing remotely how to pitch the show to non-fans in a way that susinctly and accuratly describes the experience of the show because it is So Unlike Anything out there, and then having no one to share these thoughts that are burning holes into your brain
#midst podcast#midst#this is a cry for help#really though how are you guys pitching this to your friends and family? the closest i get is 'its a space western idk you have to see it'#and then toss them the s1 trailer if i have it on hand#the struggle of not wanting to be an insane lunatic about midst around my loved ones but also wanting them to experience the show š
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one night, freshly turned louis feeds from lestat and he drinks so much that lestat carefully cradles his head in both of his big palms and gently pulls him away from his neck "mon cher, i have no more to give", he doesn't want to stop him but he's feeling faint and hungry again "I will go feed and come back home to you, saint louis"
in response louis looks up at him with big round eyes that hold so much hurt in them, lestat said he would take care of him, so why is he stopping him from feeding from him? he promised that he would give him the world so why can't he give him this? and now he wants to leave louis alone to go hunt..?
lestat obviously isn't privy to louis' thoughts anymore but he can see the glassiness that covers his eyes, he can see the sad frown on his face, he notices the way louis is looking at him but not really seeing him and decides that he won't can't leave him alone in this state
so he gathers louis further into his arms, pulls him onto his lap and holds him throughout the rest of the night, occasionally rubbing a hand down his back as if he's comforting a frightened puppy, and peppers kisses on his forehead, nose and cheeks because louis' makes a cute lil sound every single time that he does
When louis eventually comes back to himself he's a bit embarrassed by his actions and tries to pull away but lestat doesn't let him ofc, he holds him tighter and tells louis how sweet he was for him "louis you never told me just how much you liked my blood" he says, his smile evident in his voice
by the time sunrise comes, they have made their way to the coffin and louis is snuggled up to lestat with his face once again in his neck (this is louis comfort place), lestat has his arms wrapped tightly around him and just like that, completely surrounded by each other they fall into a deep sleep.
#louis is blood drunk guys which is basically subspace#new hc just dropped#the hc being that louis likes to feed from lestat#and gets in a subspace like mindset#lestat whispered it into my ear as i was sleeping like he knows louis best sorry guys#i think sleep deprivation might be getting to me lol#loustat#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#interview with the vampire#how do we think lestat would react the first time louis went into subspace?#i think he would be flustered but find louis soooo so so sweet#i guess aftercare is different when you're a vampire but louis just likes being as close to lestat as possible#i keep posting stuff like this ..is it annoying to you guys? idk i worry sometimes šš#btw yes lestat is still hungry...the things he does for the love of his life š
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"āmatsukawa, quit pushing me down, asshat!" "nah." "i will kick your shins bro do not test meā"
alt. ver. before the redraw (bc i still kinda like this š)
#a silly !#yumeship#matsukawa issei#haikyuu oc#hanamaki takahiro#haikyuu#mblue art#self insert#ocsona#seijohbros au#<ā will b using this tag to refer to these shenanigans w my haikyuu ocsona for now š«¶#maybe in the near future i'll make a (tentative?) ref sheet for this new lil guy <3#(i say that knowing i havent made new/official ref sheets for my own utmv sonas lmfaooo šš)#also yeah um dont mind the shading! or any anatomy mistake! i wanted this out of my head asap and move on to the next doodle</3#edit i redrew the guys; something in me said smt jst aint right so i changed their angles to be as close to my initial vision as possible--#--and the brain seemed to calm down after that lolz orz#idk if i conveyed it well but mattsun is supposed to look like he's really towering over my ocsona due to the camera angle lol#(ngl that little curve on mattsun's mouth was for the simp in me š--#--he was gonna have his usual :/ pout thing but that braincell won and took over /silly)#(ngl every time i look at matsukawa in this i get hit w 1-2hp dmg.)#(hes staring right at the camera/viewer. he looks. soft and . pogi. like cute-handsome. clutches my hair)#(gawddam bestfriends to lovers trope i can never escape from you shakes my fist)
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world's evilest middle schooler
#asoiaf#a song of ice and fire#valyrianscrolls#joffrey baratheon#my art#guys um idk how to tell you this...I amputated his emo fringe#t'was annoying to draw#and his siblings' too...it WAS just a phase after all š#its ok ive kept a lil strand of hair there. as an homage#unironically why ive been drawing their show vers lately i didnt know how 2 break the news. lol jk its also bc its fun#but damn its been a while. ok ig he was in the pmv but i drew those frames a while ago it doesnt count#n also ive changed his design a lil bit. he's slightly more šŗ now. and he's got eyeliner
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An analysis on c!Owen and his behaviour throughout the Outsiders SMP series!
Some disclaimers before I go into this. There will be spoilers up ahead! I would like to warn anyone reading that this post will mention some blacklisted members from the smp because their characters play a role in showing us about cOwen.
For convenience, all the members mentioned are the characters, not the actual ccs themself. Some of this might seem all over the place, but when the characters learn random parts of themselves at different points it's bound to happen.
Owen has changed a lot as the series has progressed and many find his personality to have changed entirely towards the end, however, this isnāt really the case. When we go over his character, we can see his core values have stuck with him throughout the series, so in this post, I will go over how exactly he has changed over time and his character in general.
To make it easier, Iām gonna split it into 3 parts. Early maze days, the introduction of clearing 2, and post memories.
During the early maze days Owen establishes his character very early on. Right from the beginning, Owen arrives with the demon Rasbi. They are notably one of the three pairs that come up, with most coming up the elevator alone. The first time we see him, Owen immediately takes up a role as a protector, asking if Rasbi knows how to fight in case there is danger up ahead.
In this first section, we can also see that he acts a lot more childish and naive. Heās very emotional and easily upset by his past. He can be seen jumping on rocks with Mohwee and the others and crying on his first night over his loss of memories. The overwhelmingness of the clearing gets to him. This isnāt to say he is some weak, stupid or soft character though.Ā
Owen may be naive in believing things should be played in certain ways according to his rules but there are many instances where we can see heās not stupid. First episode he can immediately recognise what knife Oeca is holding āHey thatās a throwing knife right? No thatās a daggerāĀ
After getting more settled in the maze he asks about the mazeās agriculture, he mentions everyone is unarmed despite fearing the dangers in the maze. He starts asking about protection, armour, shields and notably, āSo this place is safe on the inside? It's safe to walk at night?ā Heās already worried for everyoneās safety here, he knows the maze is dangerous so is there anywhere thatās safe?Ā
Very early on his past also becomes a very important aspect of his personality. He is probably one of the first to remember anything significant about his past. By episode 2 he is getting flashbacks about how to make a bow. But he makes a javelin first, noting āI think I was a hunter. No, I was an archer. I was a hunter. I was a soldier? I was good at this.ā He then proceeds to aim the javelin at Oecaās name, because at this point he canāt fully trust Ocea. He is very quick to violence, although he doesn't want Oeca dead, he certainly canāt trust in him.Ā
Another important note is that Mohwee is one of the people in the clearing he respected and saw as someone with the ability to act. Which is why we get this interaction where Mohwee calls out āOwen.ā and Owen replies with āyes sirā. His past even without his memories is important and ingrained enough he still acts like this, and this only continues as we go through this section.
The first time they go in the maze as a group is when Apo arrives. This is a very important moment for Owen because their first trip in the maze solidifies his personality throughout this section and maybe even the series. Oeca is shot because Mohwee was careless and brought anyone in. When the group comes back, Owen asks Graecie, āHow many entrances are there to this maze?ā After finding out this is the only one that opens, he refuses to let anyone get hurt again and starts blocking it off.
Trust and promises are very important to Owen here too because it's one of the key reasons he blocks off the entrance. Itās not just Oeca getting hurt, itās the fact he promised Graecie he wouldn't go in. āI broke my promise.ā He also takes Apoās word very seriously in the mine when he tells Owen he didnāt pull the lever. Also because of this he only trusts himself to go in the maze.
When the entrance is blocked off Owen is quick to violence and threatens people if they try to get past him. After finding the old battle axe he starts using it to threaten and intimidate people. āAnyone who goes past this (the gate) i will attackā
āAnyone else that will, I will just cut downā are some of the things he says. He punches Mohwee for trying to get past him. When Oeca comes back after Mohweeās disappearance, Owen follows him with that battle axe trying to talk.
Owen then goes on to say āIām not looking for violenceā and āI'm not collecting weapons this was instinctual (points at bow)ā he doesn't want people to think heās dangerous and he knows people are scared of him.
Even if he seems aggressive he still wants to protect others. Owen goes back in the maze to look for Mohwee after he randomly disappears on their way back. āMy job is to protect people and I will do that to the best of my abilities. At every possible stageā
When Mohwee disappears Owen takes a massive risk to stay in the maze overnight to see if the gates would open. āThe only thing I remember about my life Graecie, is that I was raised to protect people. That's all I remember. And I know it was dumb and stupid to go in the maze but if it got us a step closer to finding Mohwee. I was willing to make that riskā
So weāve established that Owen cares about the people in the clearing even if he doesn't trust all of them, he wants to protect them and he will do it no matter what. It's the purpose he has given himself in order to be useful.
He knows it doesnāt work how he wants it to. People are scared and wary of Owenās protection. There are multiple instances where he tells his voices, āThey donāt get it,ā because he knows people donāt trust his methods. His method of control is disliked by a lot of people.Ā
Ori is one of the main characters to go against Owen. Owen hates this because not only does it risk the safety of others but it goes against his main purpose he gave himself. He takes this job very seriously. So when Ori goes in the maze itās no wonder Owen becomes very violent.
āOri I'm seriously sorry I will break your legs and I'm very close to it. Are you gonna make me. ā
He doesnāt see himself to be super aggressive though āPeople think I'm being really aggressive when I talk like āoh hey if you come near me I'm gonna break your legsā but I'm saying it in the most friendly way I can, you understand that right? I'm not trying to be aggressive with thatā
āI'm saying like if you do step in here I will have to break your legs. In like a very gentle and I'm very sorry I hate to inconvenience you but I do have to break your legs.ā
When Ori sneaks into the maze, Owen talks a lot about his purpose. Things like āDon't, I'll fail them. They'll kill me. My entire purpose here is to stay by this door and stop you from coming in.ā
Owen hates to know he is failing the purpose he has given to himself āWhen I discovered I was a soldier that's what I set myself to (protecting others) but what do I have to show for myself? I have tried my hardest to protect these people. And get they look at me and tell me I'm a tyrantā āyou're not in control, who are you to say what happens?ā
He would do anything, even if it meant sacrificing himself. As shown before when Mohwee disappears but also as he protects the gate after the second lever gets pulled he says āI'm going to protect them if I die in the process so be itāĀ Ā
Another note before this section ends is that itās not just Ori who opposes Owen. Sillvia also talks about Owenās method of leadership.
Sillvia about Owen: Owen I think you would be great. If not for the fact that you have a militaristic mindset. I don't want to see your leadership spiral into a place where Apo wants. Owen I fear you and I want you to know that. I actually fear you and I don't say that about many people. And ruling should not be through fear. You are a terrifying individual and to see you be in a position of power would be a slope we cannot afford or gamble slipping down. We've seen you tussle with Ori. I know you're a strong individual. You could lead us quite well but it's the risk that comes with your leadership that I am not willing to risk.Ā
The perception Owen has of himself differs from how he comes off. It becomes more of an issue later but we can already see this happen.Ā
So as clearing 2 is introduced this is what we know about Owen. He was a soldier once, he wanted to protect people in the clearing even if it meant sacrificing himself. Heās nice to others but his methods are still aggressive and violent, ready to hold a weapon to someone if needed and Owen cares a lot about trust.Ā
With the introduction of clearing 2 we can see how Owen changes and develops. Heās very cautious of clearing 2 members because for all he knows they could have led the creature that destroyed half their clearing in on purpose.Ā
Owen also faces betrayal from Apo. We know trust is something Owen values a lot. Itās mentioned in the early days, and itās a major part of why he feels so strongly about Apo lying. During the scene where Owen faces Apo after finding he pulled the lever that killed the second clearing, his main issue with Apo isnāt the fact that he killed people. It was the fact he lied to him.
āYou lied to me. Why did you do it? No no no I don't care about the lever. Apo why did you lie to me? You're my friend I trusted you. I stayed there. I held your back when oeca said it was you. I put my name on the line. Because we stood together in the mine and I asked you to swear to my face that you didn't do it. And you lied to me. Im meant to be your friend and you lied.āĀ
You can also see what Owen values in a person when they discuss Apoās punishment and Owen says there's 3 main things he did
- went into maze without group consent
- pulled the lever
- he lied
Owen only adds on at the end that he left Squidney.
With all of this too we see Owen for the first time back away from the job he gave himself. He backs away from leadership, we start to see how tired Owen is from the stress of it all. His reasoning has to do with his trust being broken.
āWhat's the point they're all liars. This entire place is filled with filthy liars. Every single person. All I've ever done is tried to protect themā
āForget it. I'm done. I'm don't helping people. No I'm not villain, I'm not a hero I'm nothing.
From now on there is no leader of the maze. They put me in charge. My word means nothing to them I'm done.ā
āHow am I meant to protect them when I try and stop them with physical force im made out to be some kind of monster. When I try to reason with them I'm made out to be soft.āĀ Ā
Owen being viewed as soft has always been something heās aware of. People tend to think because heās kind that they can do whatever they want (sneak into the maze etc) and this perception Owen is a soft person develops. Even if heās emotional and kind weāve seen before in early maze days he is not soft.Ā
Owen tries to ignore all his problems but with it he grows more aggressive than before. His tone changes when he speaks about other people to his voices.
āTo visit him would be to acknowledge he exists. And right now the last thing I want to do is consider the fact that this thing lives and breathes and eats and sleeps under my feet. The sooner he wastes away and fades into nothingness the better. I don't see a life going forward with him in itāĀ - Owen about Apo
āThe more I look around these stupid 4 walls the more I'm reminded that he that. That I trusted him.ā
"he's everywhere. It's like a disease. Like it festers. The outside looks fine and you look just below the surface and it's rotting vile and it's himā
Apo: Just give me a chance.
Owen: why should I? So you can have another tick to the long list of times Owen has naively believed there is some good in the people that infests this clearing? Oeca, mohwee, Bekyamon, Magic, Graecie, Ori, you, liars. All of you.
Iām not just putting quotes here just for you to see oh trust is important! But more so for you to see that Owen changes when his trust has been broken or when he sees someone as a threat. Some of these things sound very similar to what Owen would say when he gets his memories back. Because to Owen trust and protection are 2 very important values. When that is broken he canāt be certain someone isnāt a threat.Ā
With this change Owen does become more aware he isnāt the most approachable person due to his methods. I do want to bring up this quote first thoughĀ
"Can I kill someone? Ive been thinking about this recently I say I'm a soldier. But I've never actually killed anyone. All my life in these 4 walls I've spoken about security and fighting and I can't remember a time I've actually taken someone's life. What if I have to. What if it comes to that I don't think I could stomach it either. I doesn't feel like me. It's not me it's not who I am. No I can't. I'll only attack this person if they do something first. And even then I'll just aim to incapacitate"Ā - Owen about Ash
This is an interesting quote from Owen knowing his later actions but itās not that out of character. If we look at every flashback heās had so far we can see the life of a soldier is not one heās always wanted.
Owen to his dad: What if I'm not ready to be your protector? No It's what you've always wanted! What if I wanted to do something else? What if I don't want to be a soldier what about me when do I get to look out for myself.
However he is always ready to attack if he needs to, if it comes to it he would do anything to protect someone. I think that means to kill even if Owen doesnāt think so at this point.Ā
His notebook btw
Another note about his behavior is that because of how others view him he almost dies from the creatureās venom. Ayngel even said before Owen is more angry. Other people even though it sounds jokingly say Owen gets grumpy when people disrupt him, leading to no one but Soup to check up on him when he gets stung.
When Bek comes back he doesnāt hesitate to do the things he did before. He does what he thinks is right and protects Magic by aiming a javelin at Bek. He says heās not violent but anytime he feels like heās in danger he pulls out a weapon. He did it when he was in Soupās basement, he does it anytime he hears about someone potetially harming Rasbi, and he did it when he heard Oeca attacked Graecie.Ā
Owen in general is a fighter at heart. Even if he says he doesnāt want to kill anyone he is still ready to attack.Ā
Owen: this isn't you Ori. You fight. That's what you do.
Ori: what are you talking about?
Owen: you fight people. When you don't get your way you fight. You and I are the same
At the end of this section, the group decides not to go back in the maze. They had lost Squidney, Oeca, Mohwee, with the presumption that Red, Apo and Graecie were either dead or dying. Owen is tired of it all āEvery Time I've tried to protect someone they've ended dead Kyleā he tries to hope but he is so tired. This tiredness also explains some things that happen when he gets his memory back.Ā
So to summarise before looking at Owen when he gets his memories back, this is what we know about Owen. He wants to protect his friends, he believes in trust a lot, he is both seen as more aggressive and angry these days and soft at the same time, he wants to be a good leader but other people donāt listen. Not much has changed since the early maze days, but itās a more solid character now.Ā
When the reunion comes around Owen in the story has finally had a moment to think about everything that happened between him and Apo. His main regret in the series was how he treated him even if he broke his trust.Ā
Owen loves to contradict himself a lot but itās a very human trait he has. He has complex feelings about Apo, and Beks and a lot of people. Yet heāll still offer his protection to them. Itās because of this the āsuddenā shift in personality he has becomes very shocking to the audience.Ā
Since right before he sees Apo, Owen is very emotional here. Very similar to how he was in the early maze days. Itās out of his character to hope for something like seeing Apo because he knows itās very unlikely heāll see him again. However he gives himself this hope, one more chance.Ā
When Owen regains his memories the tone shift is obvious. He acts less emotional, he seems more mature. But we do need to consider this is someone who just had a lifetime of memories shoved back in his head and his core values are so strong that Owen doesnāt hesitate to act the way he used to.Ā
Thereās lots of similarities to Owen here to the one weāve known. Like his purpose. He sets one for himself immediately after arriving in the clearing. Even as he talks to Apo about his past he talks about his purpose
āI had a purpose once. I was useful, vital, adored. And suddenly everything changed. The world grew tired of blood shed. When all you're good for is violence, when you've been breed into a killing machine, a nation of peace will toss you aside like a spent torchā
Thereās an obvious difference here right? The man weāve watched in the maze who wanted to protect his friends just killed his best friend. This is definitely a different person right? Yes and no. Owen hasnāt changed that much, and I'll explain why after we go through some more things. But itās important to note that this isnāt a completely new person, this isnāt something that is unexpected when we go through the information we already have about Owen.Ā
āI know what you are, you are everything wrong in the world has to offer. You are the amalgamation of all the gluttony and lust of humans with the evil and cunning of demons. You stand as a testament to everything vile. You are a disease on the face of this earth and I am it's curseāĀ
Apo: this isn't you you've changedĀ
Owen: incorrect, this is me. The man you manipulated and lied was nothing more than a puppet driven by the instinct to survive.Ā
Owen wants protection for his friends. He goes to extreme lengths to keep people safe, so when he remembers demons as this evil creature that will hurt people for their own gain he wasnāt going to stand around and do nothing right?Ā
Surprising or not this is very in character for Owen if we look at everything else we have from the series. To him, he is still doing his job, the one heās done since day 1 in the clearing. Just now the threat isnāt just the maze and the occasional person, itās demons.Ā
The way Owen became a demon hunter is essential too. He used to live in comfort, and based on past flashbacks he was training to be a soldier even if he didnāt fully enjoy it. His mother was a poet and his father was a general. He had grown up hearing all about how terrible demons are, and he didnāt understand until his village had been burned down.
One negative interaction with demons had put this deep hatred in his heart for them. Before his memories returned he was ready to forgive Apo, he knew he wasnāt as dangerous as he made him out to be. But when the sudden influx of memory comes, he has this past knowledge that Apo is a threat.Ā
Since Apo had hurt Owen before this only adds to it. Remember Owen really values trust. Apo has broken that trust in the past, so everything combined and letting go of the final restriction itās no wonder he kills Apo.Ā
Despite this āmassive personality changeā Owen has, when he returns to the clearing he still makes sure Magic is safe. He doesn't tell people about the lava rising so he wouldnāt cause panic. He still cares about these people.Ā
But Owen starts to view all the demons as a threat, every demon in the clearing has done something to suggest they could be dangerous. The reason Owen kills Guts is because they poisoned the food at the feast, which led to Magic being poisoned. He carries out this duty for protection
I think another thing people tend to forget about Owen is that he's been slowly breaking apart trying to fit what others want from him as seen in the last section. And it took a major toll on him. His outburst at Magic is one of the ways shown to us how much stress heās been under. Perhaps even guilt heās been feeling.
Magic: if you don't you're just putting everyone danger by not leading usā¦ in thereā¦
Owen: danger? You want to talk about putting others in danger? All of this coming from who exactly? The woman who's clearing burnt down under her leadership? The woman who lied about that previous position of leadership as she lacked the spine to correct her friend when she lied? The woman who was tied up and left for dead by that same friend? The woman who swore to protect a stranger only to them shot down in front of her? What the woman who stood still as her friend was ripped apart beside her? Oh yeah the magnitude of your failures Magic is deafening. Do you hear it? When you fall asleep at night, do you hear the screams of the dead who's blood stain your hands? How do you cope? When you find out be a good friend and let me know would you? Been looking for a way to shut them up.Ā
Owen does try to justify his actions to his voices even if they donāt listen. He knows people here arenāt good. Heās known this since clearing 2 was introduced, but with his memories back he feels like he has to carry on this duty by killing the threat. Thatās the only way to keep people in the clearing safe right?
Owen to voices: have you stopped to think why I'm doing this? You seem so attached to these creatures, why? What good have they done? These people aren't good people. None of us good people. We're all in here for a reason. Just because you haven't taken your rose tinted glasses off to see that doesn't mean the rest of us haven't.Ā
Like before he wonāt let anything stop him, even if it means hurting a few people. He doesn't hesitate to pull out a weapon when he hears Ayngel might know him. He canāt risk anything ruining his plans because he canāt afford to. Heās so tired. I think at this point anyone that was a major threat to him he would kill.Ā
Ayngel: I feel like I recognise you. You and your face from somewhereĀ
Owen: oh? (Starts to pull out knife from his bag)
Ayngel: I've been having this thought and it's got me thinking (Owen pulls out a knife in case)
Ayngel: actually, honestly forget it. It's all a dream and I'm overthinking
The only exception to his thinking is Rasbi. Rasbi actually hasnāt done anything wrong to him personally. Sheās one of the few people that didnāt break his trust but he still kills her. Why?Ā
First off he doesnāt see her as the friend he wanted to protect but instead as something he protected only to kill in the end to fulfil his duty. Her sister is the reason why he ended up in the maze, so even without Rasbi directly harming Owen in any way itās enough for Owen to kill her. Iām sure any small mistake or detail would have led Owen to killing any demon, because it only proves his thinking.Ā
Owen barely survives after Rasbi attacks him. So as Owen starts planning how to kill Krow he starts going a bit insane. His room is a mess, his mind is a mess and he can barely stand it anymore. We really start to see him fall apart here
Owen: this yolk is a burden is a burden I can't carry for much longer. I'm tired. I want to rest. But I took a pact, I made a promise. A glorious death is his for who his country falls and either I or they thing will have to die before I stop.Ā
Something thatās brought up when discussing the idea of āMaze Owenā is the fact that we can see āglimpsesā of him in different interactions. For example when Owen and Krow go out into the maze and Owen spots Puddy he makes sure Puddy doesnāt die by keeping him away. Even if heās aggressive in the scene the fandom interpretation is the care he has for Puddy as āMaze Owenā slipped through. But Itās not out of character for him to still show care for people after his memories are returned based on everything weāve seen.
Before ākillingā off Krow, Owen does say this āThere's no escaping who you areā Which is really interesting since most characters heās interacted with will tell him in the maze you can escape who you used to be. Owen knows for a fact no matter what he does in life now he will never have anything outside the maze. Because the world doesnāt need him anymore. He kills the demons as his final act of service to the world because he has nothing else to offer.Ā
When Krow finally comes back and Owen gets hit in the head he says to the rest of the group āI was protecting you all.ā and āYou don't know what they're like! You haven't seen the outside world.ā
Looking at his final moments we see that everyone that Owen has cared about doesnāt trust him anymore. They donāt believe his protection was needed. Heās told that he will not get out of this cell. Heās left alone in the silence of the cell. Finally with the time to think. He starts experiencing multiple flashbacks and it makes it hard for him to think.Ā
Weāve seen in the past how Owen deals with multiple flashbacks. It gives him a headache or causes him pain in some cases. He also becomes really emotional afterwards. This follows the same case. Except he starts to realize some things.
Krow: I know those eyes. That glint of desperation for approval but knowing it's never coming. We're more similar than you let yourself believe you and I
(Flash back āi was an archer.?ā āi was a hunter?ā I was a soldier)
āI was a tool. Used.ā
He knows heās going to die soon and he starts to panic. The most important line he says isĀ
āSo what now? This is it!? I deserve to die in battle. I killed them. It was what I. Its just what I was meant to do. I was trained. Should i have? I should have. I should have. I can't think inside my head, it's split in twoāĀ
āSo what voices? What was I before then huh? Was that me? Is that who people trust? People trust that one. Old Owen. Yes? It wasn't me. That wasn't meā flashback about Apo first coming up
āI can't think. I can't. They trusted him. They trusted him but not me? My headā¦ā
After this he pleads with Magic to let him out. Owen claims āI hurt them, I hurt my friends. Rasbi, Guts. And Apo, Krow I don't know why I did those thingsā He pleads and cries. And he's desperate
Owen: āNo magic it's me please.āĀ
Magic: āYou kill people owenā
Owen: āIt wasn't me I'm sorry. I just wanted to keep people safe.āĀ
Owen: āMagic please don't goā¦ noā¦ magic. You can't do this.ā
Magic: āI can and I amāĀ
I think when we look at these final clips thereās a very important thing happening. Owen is separating himself from the past. He canāt understand why his friends donāt trust him. Even though nothing has changed. To him his eyes have been opened to the dangers of demons and he fulfilled his purpose.Ā
Why does this separation even happen? This is where we move to the final part of this long analysis and look at theories. Thereās no way I can say for sure this is right or this is wrong. I can only tell you what I think based on the material already there.Ā
So before I go into this I have to emphasize I am not saying you can't refer to earlier Owen as maze Owen to explain Owen at different periods of his life. I'm saying when we really look at it, maze Owen doesn't exist since they're the same person.Ā
So what am I talking about? The concept of āmazeā Owen has been around for a long time. Even ccOwen talks about his character like that. The idea that just because Owen didnāt have his memories that he was some sweet, soft guy that needs to be babied is something that affects a lot on how you view him as a character.Ā
'maze' Owen doesn't actually exist because it's a way that Owen has come up with to justify to himself how he could have cared for demons without shattering his ideals. This is confused with Owen have distinct personalities and missing how he hasn't strayed from his ideals since the start with his idea of protecting everyone.
To separate that period of Owen's life in the maze ignores the fact that the characteristics you see in Owen post reunion are the same from before but taken to the extreme.
He's always been capable of āevilā'. It's the same as every other character in the series. We don't separate them like we do with Owen. Every character in the series is inherently morally gray, they do things out of desperation to survive. You can never say someone is 100% good or bad.Ā
Owenās same mindset of 'I need to protect the people I care about because they're in danger now' carries through. After the reunion in his head demons are no longer part of that group he wants to protect.Ā
The separation of 'maze' and post reunion Owen forgets even in the post memory phase he had the ability to love like 'maze' Owen had. He released Puddy, he started a small farm, he started to relax. It's all part of him.
In his final moments he says a few important things to note. The first being "I was a tool. I was trained. Should I have... I should have." And then right after "I can't think in my head it's split in two"
It seems some take this as 'maze' Owen coming back and fighting with Owen on should he have killed Apo and the others. However rather than 'maze' Owen coming back i think it's this internal conflict he has with himself and his ideals.
Before he says this he's getting flashbacks to the early maze days where he showed kindness to demons. Something he would never let himself do in the past outside the maze. And something he would never do after he remembers it all.
Then he says to the voices "Is that who people trust? Old Owen" while those memories are playing. The voices respond saying they miss that Owen and he replies "Yes? That wasn't me" this is possibly where it further adds to the whole 'maze' Owen is a different person thing.
Rather than facing the fact that his thinking doesnāt make sense anymore he separates himself from those memories. As soon as Owen accepts that demons are not these creatures that betray and kill you at any moment, his life has no purpose.
Owenās thinking comes from the manipulation and propaganda he's been fed. In his final episode we get these quotes which show just how much his thinking revolves around protection and also showing what years of training did to him.
He understands he was a tool that was used. He's well aware everything he is doing may not have a purpose and yet he still plays this part. He can't break away from that thinking because if he lets himself, Owen has to face the fact that his whole life had no true meaning.
That is a terrifying thing to do. He has been in this environment for so long you canāt just take him out of it.Ā
Going over everything you can access in Owenās pov, we know that before gaining his memories Owen is a person that cares deeply about his friends, he risks himself to protect them, he wonāt hesitate to hold a weapon against someone he sees as a threat. Owen thinks trust is an important value to have, he takes it very seriously. But we also know that not everyone likes Owen and his leadership. Heās seen with a military mindset, people donāt want to upset him and it nearly costs his life.
Now letās compare that with the Owen we get to know after his memories return. He wants to protect the people he deeply cares about, he risks himself to protect them, he doesnāt hesitate to hold a weapon against someone that he sees as a threat, only now the threat is demons. When we start looking at these differences, yes, Owen when he regains his memories is different, his tone changes, he murders people. But those core values weāve seen throughout the series stay with him.
Itās one of the reasons why Owen canāt understand why no one in the clearing is on his side. He protected them against the threat they didn't know about. That is his purpose, and thatās what heās good for. Remember right at the beginning of the series Owen sets his purpose to protect these people, now this is still the same. He views demons as a threat because he hasnāt had good experiences with them. Even if Apo became his friend in the clearing, Apo ends up lying to Owen, and betraying his trust. Guts became his friend but Guts tried to poison Magic. Owen has never fully trusted Krow and that distrust only furthers once he knows what Krow is capable of based on his experiences with demons.
So letās go back to the previous question: who was it there? Youāre probably thinking well how do you explain maze Owen and the chips. ccOwen has mentioned before that it's a possibility for the chips to alter memories. Maybe Starr suppressed those memories and maze Owen was there again. Or he was hit hard on the head right? Maybe his chip was damaged and it altered his emotions and memory.
There is too little known information to us as an audience about the chips in their head. We know they can supposedly make the outsiders lose track of time, alter their memories, their emotions and change how they act. But if the chips in their head is the explanation for everything then why does Owen remember killing his friends when he talks to Magic? He says it like he wasn't the one doing it, like he watched someone else do it. How do you explain his behaviour then? If the damaged chip really made him act like that then why do flashbacks still occur when he's in prison? He seems to have no control over those, so the chip must still work fine?
I think when we look at his character the maze has already changed him whether he likes it or not. Thereās more doubt in him than before. He lets Apo go with extra time. He hesitated before he ran after him. No matter how small, he has changed.
But when Owen talks about himself in the past he makes this separation. The voices in his head won't stop calling for the guy they used to know, even though he's right here. I think Owen doesn't even want to acknowledge at one point he was friends with the demons he hated so much.Ā
In that prison cell all his ideals and values are facing him. Everything he's done and he's known has been a lie. I think he knows this but can't bring himself to acknowledge that. Would you admit what you thought for your entire life was wrong? That you killed countless for nothing?
When faced with death Owen becomes desperate. Which I think explains his behaviour with Magic. That is his last hope and he knows people like the older version of him. I don't think he's fully lying though when he says i don't know why I did those things. Not because maze Owen came back or anything but because in the maze he no longer has this duty but he still carries it out. He's so tired from it all and he wants to leave it behind but he can't.
So let's go over his death scene one more time. āMy head it's split in twoā I think the explanation for this is that he was just hit with a bunch of flashbacks of his first days. Right before this he also says āI was a tool. Usedā I believe in his final moments where he has a moment to think he starts to fight himself. Should he have done all this for a country that throws him away the second he's useless? He was trained to do this. But should he have really? That's what I think is making him say my head it's split in two. He's fighting his own views and alongside these positive memories it makes him confused. And overwhelmed.
It's important to note Owen doesn't have a single bad flashback about Apo and Rasbi. He doesn't think about the levers, he thinks about his friends that he met. That he protected.
The more flashbacks he gets the more defensive he becomes. āI'm right here you can't convince me otherwiseā He doesn't understand why the Owen in his memories is trusted so much, even though they're the same person. In his mind he's doing what he's always done. protect.
āIt wasn't me I'm sorry I just wanted to keep people safeā everything he says to Magic is half genuine and half lie. I don't think even Owen knows which parts are which. It's easier if he separates himself into the nice trusted Owen and who he is now.
No matter what in the end, that was Owen. Not Maze Owen but Owen who is desperate to live. He's tired of it all. He's finished his mission and he won't even get to see what he thinks will be an honorable ending for him.
Remember what Owen says to Apo? "The man you manipulated and lied was nothing more than a puppet driven by the instinct to survive."
So of course he'll do anything to survive even if it means playing up the truth.
It's hard to separate Owen into these neat boxes and say for sure that was Maze Owen at the end or that was full manipulation. Because like Owen everything is a bit grey here. Maze Owen wasn't the best person, he hurt his friends, people were scared of him. And post memories Owen isn't some misunderstood guy that needs babying either.Ā
My final thoughts on this debate is that in the end the one that pleads for his life is just Owen. To separate him and say it was Maze Owen doesn't allow you to understand how complex Owen is as a character. And continues to let you believe that Owen can't do anything wrong.Ā Not understanding sometimes a good person is capable of this evil. To the end Owen still believed he was doing what was right and that was protecting the ones he cared about. So has anything really changed since the start?
#zara rambles#outsiders smp#outsiders smp spoilers#owengejuicetv#okay if you read this whole thing just know this was about 6k words sjdfhsd#i spent a looooong time writing this mainly cause i started in july got busy with school and continued it last week. along with rewatching#owens pov to get everything here. the original document with all my notes is like 12k long because cOwen looooves to talk#i'm open to other people's opinions obviously like i said i could be wrong but this is just how i see it based on the episodes we have on y#it's kinda unfair to expect people to know random knowledge buried deep in some 4 hour vod from 2 years ago so everything here is from yt#with the exception that one fighting cOri quote since Owen deleted that section from his yt series. but it was originally there#idk what else to say really. i'm not the biggest fan of the whole 'maze' owen thing as you can tell by this and many other posts of mine#i think its fine to call him that but you gotta understand there aren't actually 2 different people. thats the tldr#anyway ty for reading wish me luck when i post this on twitter#oh sorry for no videos tumblr hates those so you guys only got the quotes š still the same stuff though so it doesn't really matter sjdjdj
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Replaying RE4R, and I am once again thinking of how Leon just straight up murders a guy the moment he attacks. Like yeah, sure, he lunged at him with a weapon, there is a bloody badge of an officer, things are sketchy to say the least, but still. It all happens so fast, I doubt he actually had the time to fully put two and two together quite yet.
And you can't tell me that Leon, a trained agent, just overestimated the power of his kick on accident. That ā
Was a pretty much deliberate kick. What's interesting is that in the OG RE4, he at least tells the ganado to freeze a good couple of times (or maybe once, I don't remember the specifics, but my point still stands) before actually proceeding to harm him. Remake Leon, meanwhile... just breaks his neck without a second thought.
And his reaction right after makes it... pretty obvious, honestly.
There is no strong reaction there to offing an old man in his home. Now, granted, he hears a scream right after, so it's not like he has much time to stand and ponder over what happened! But the only thing he says right after is: 'This is not good.' And, yeah, true, but we do know Leon is capable of expressing some level of distress over something he finds disturbing, and he proceeds to do that literally a few minutes later once you start exploring the village. So really, it's an interesting scene and a very intriguing way of introducing this hardened version of Leon we'll be playing as.
I wouldn't be thinking about this as much if not for the circumstances surrounding it. Not like Leon is aware that this man is infected with anything. Up until the moment he gets back up, he could be just some disturbed, paranoid old man or something. And he did just walk into someone's house. He's an intruder here, really. But the moment danger presents itself, he eliminates the threat without a second thought.
I think it speaks volumes of the past 6 years that passed for him, and how they shaped him. We don't know much of Leon's job: what it entails exactly, what kind of work he does on the daily, how the entire structure operates. And before the events of RE4, it's not like he was a well-known agent, if I remember correctly. It's his successful rescue of Ashley that got him high in the ranks. His status as a Racoon City survivor didn't do that. Throughout RE4R, we see him regain his humanity through the connections with other characters, going from the cold, robotic way he caries himself at the start of the game, to the determined, emotionally-invested man we later see carrying Ashley to Luis' laboratory.
It's very neat to think about! And while we all love Leon for his kind heart and his drive to save innocent lives, he is more than capable of violence, and that's an aspect of him I wish was talked about more. That neck break was definitely not the first one for him, just saying.
#resident evil#resident evil 4 remake#re4r#leon kennedy#leon scott kennedy#re4r leon#excuse my very poorly made gifs i made them just to accompany my post š#idk if you can call this an analysis i'm pretty much just stating my thoughts lmao#but yeah#imagine if that ganado was just some old man#leon just broke his neck and left#YIKES#like i'm SURE he could just.... disarm the guy or knock him out#but no#i wouldn't be saying that if he wasn't a highly trained agent too#like an average guy would just act on instinct and accidentally end up killing#but c'mon#no way that's the case here#aight i'm just babbling at this point#leon's kicks are the best i love them
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