#idk why this is them but it feels like them. like. proverbially

[huntershowl-moving]

@vsagis

*holding onto ur heart thru ur ribcage* so what are we

[silens-oro]

Do I Divide and Pull Apart?

Not all fics have adult content, but this blog is 18+. Dr. Jack Abbot x Attending!Reader

The Pitt Playlist located here Masterlist The Pitt Masterlist

Synopsis: Night shift is down an attending and Dr. Robby has volunteered you to fill the space in the interim. Dr. Abbot may or may not have made the request for you specifically. Word Count: 2.9k Content Warning: Typical warnings for The Pitt, medical inaccuracies A/N: idk what this even is, but I started it and here we are. please comment & reblog :)

“What did I ever do to you, Robby?” You followed him from room to room as he visually checked in on patients, which led to the nurses station he was currently leaning on with you hovering anxiously next to him. 

“Other than becoming my star pupil, who is exemplary in the field of medicine?” He replied sarcastically, not looking up from the chart he was scrolling through on the tablet in his hand. “Nothing, I assure you.” He pushed his glasses up from where they slid down to the tip of his nose. 

“Then why am I, your ‘star pupil’, being punished?” You used finger quotes, staring unrelentingly at your Chief Attending. Robby sighed, setting the tablet down on the nurses station. He plucked his glasses off and squeezed the bridge of his nose before giving you one of his looks. The ‘please do not push back on me right now’ look that you had seen him give Langdon and Santos countless times when he needed cooperation, but rarely to you because you generally went with the flow. 

But not with this. This you definitely did not flow with. 

“This is not a punishment.” He said with a sigh, putting his glasses back on to resume charting as he shook his head.  

“It feels like a punishment.” You argued right back, because he was throwing you to the proverbial wolves. Or the actual wolves, because who knew what freaks came out on night shift. 

“It’s not. Look, I’m doing Jack a favor by doing this, alright? He’s down an attending and needs the backup for a few weeks until they can get everything sorted out, and then you’ll be back here in the land of rainbows and eternal sunshine.” He did some hand gestures to accompany his promise.

“You are so wildly funny, you know that?” You responded, completely deadpanned, crossing your arms over your chest. 

“See that humor? You’ll fit right in.” His easy going voice was starting to grate on you as he dismissed everything you were saying to him. It was his way of working you down, to lead you into a false sense of security so he could get a yes out of you. He didn’t need your approval, but knew everything functioned better when everyone was on board. 

“They can smell fear, Robby, the patients and the staff. I know they can —Dr. Abbot especially. Why don’t you send Langdon? I think we can all agree that he's a wonderful sacrifice.” 

“His wife just had a baby.” He looked at you over his glasses. “You know this.”

“But he didn’t have the baby, and she'd agree with me. That’s favoritism on your end, Robby, and it is highly frowned upon.” You shot back, making Robby’s forehead scrunch up with how high his brows raised. “What about Collins?”

“Nope, I need her here.” Robby dismissed the suggestion. 

“And you don’t need me?” You tried not to sound offended, but you were grasping at any straws you could grab ahold of to keep you amongst the daywalkers. Robby sighed your name, stressing the Doctor that came before it. 

“Neither of them are attendings. You are. I need you to do this for me. Please. I promise you that you’re making a big deal out of this for nothing.”

“Because it is a big deal.” You said through clenched teeth. “They’re gonna chew me up and spit me out, Robby. It’s an absolute freakshow at night.” He couldn’t stop the breathy chuckle that escaped him at your theatrics. He knew he was asking a lot, but he also knew you’d be just fine under Jack’s tutelage -you’d thrive, he’d go so far as to say. In more ways than one.

“You’re gonna be fine,” He reassured you with a heavy hand on your shoulder. He gave it two pats before he looked down at his watch and set the tablet down on the charging block and taking off in the direction of North 2. 

“We’re still talking about this.” You chased after him, his long legs aiding in his escape as you needed to take three quick steps for every one of his long strides. “I thought you liked me.” You whispered sharply, not wanting the conversation to carry over to the patients, but it did gain Dana’s attention as her eyes watched the both of you go off past the HUB and to North 2. 

“You know what they say about assumptions, kid. And what was that thing about favoritism?” Robby threw a teasing grin your way before pulling the curtain back to reveal a teen boy with a very broken collarbone from a skateboarding accident. Mohan was already in the room, getting things ready for him to walk her through getting the kid stabilized, but she still watched the interaction play out curiously as her hands worked. 

“Can you please check on the kids while I sort this out?” That was his form of a dismissal if you ever heard one. You narrowed your eyes at the back of his head as he snapped a pair of blue gloves on and you took off in the direction of where Santos and Whitaker were bickering in hushed whispers, and Javadi was nowhere to be seen. They both scattered in opposite directions when they saw you headed their way, a heavy frown masking your usual perky appearance and a dark cloud following behind you.  

“Don’t let it wig you out, kid.” Dana came up next to you and put her arm around your shoulder to pull you into her side as you both walked. “Who knows, maybe you’ll like the night shift.” The involuntary look you shot her had her cackling as she playfully pushed you in the direction of South 6, where you needed to get an update from Whitaker. 

You, in fact, did not like the night shift. Everything felt off, wrong, and just slightly too askew from the way you functioned on days. Even though it was only your first night on, you couldn’t wait for this to end. 

Jack’s eyes followed you worriedly as you tried your best to hold yourself together as you made a break for the door that led to the stairwell. 

“The MVA in South 8 —she knew the kid.” Jackie, one of the night nurses, filled him in. “She just let the family know.” 

“Shit,” Jack breathed out, running a hand through his hair. “We all good here for a few minutes?” She looked at the board and nodded. 

“Everyone’s taken care of for now. Do what you have to do.” 

Jack didn’t know a ton about you other than the fact that you were an excellent doctor, had a great bedside manner, and you used humor to fill spaces of silence. You hadn’t been an open book when you showed up for your first shift, but the first few pages were turned and he got to see a glimpse of what little you were willing to show. He knew you, of you, from your years at the hospital, but he never worked directly with you as he had tonight. 

You were familiar with the other residents and interns, the nurses and charge nurse of night shift. You were familiar with Jack, but you didn’t have a relationship with him like Robby did. His ways of teaching intimidated you when you first interned at PTMC, and you had gravitated to Robby’s more approachable methods of getting the job done. Not to say that Jack wasn’t an excellent trauma doctor, because he was one of the best, but while Robby was more orthodox and by the book, Jack was unorthodox. A cowboy of the ED, if you will.

You felt like a city girl dropped into the wild west. The faces were familiar —you’d overlapped with these people day in and day out over handoffs, but you didn’t know them. Not like you knew Robby, Collin’s, Mohan, Langdon, McKay, and Dana -or the nurses that kept you all sane, Jesse and Perlah in particular. Even the interns you had gotten to know, teaching them all you could -and they responded well to your patience and instruction. You already missed the panic that seemed to settle in Whitaker’s face every time you were in the room with him as he went through a procedure he’d never done before. That was just his face, you learned after the first week with him on, but he grew on you like a weed and your guidance seemed to help build his confidence.    

The personalities on night shift were so different, and in a way you guessed that they had to be a little off their rockers to work nights. And still, they welcomed you on. Jack had shaken your hand when you came in at 6:45pm, instead of 6:45am, and Robby gave your shoulder another pat as you started your shift in what you felt was an alternate universe. There had to be a Twilight Zone episode about this kind of thing, Right?

And Jack…you might as well have been hit by a truck the first time you saw him working within the first hour of the shift. You happened to be walking by trauma bay when your eyes caught the way the muscles of his forearms twitched and flexed as he helped reset a broken tibia and you lost yourself for the briefest of moments before you looked up and saw he was already looking at you with that stare he was known for. You scurried from the door, feigning your attention being called from elsewhere just so you could distance yourself from the enigma that was Dr. Abbot.

From then on you avoided him when you could, taking every case you could get in on where you could guide a resident or intern because this was a teaching hospital and you were an attending physician. 

But all of that had been forgotten, thrown to the wayside when you met the ambulance outside after getting the page for an MVA —kid hit on a bike. Ellis stuck to you, instantly gravitating to how you worked with absolute certainty with every movement of your hands and every direction you gave her earlier in the night. But as you worked on the kid who wasn't going to make it, she saw the cracks you tried to keep hidden.

“This is very uh…Blair Witch of you,” Jack greeted awkwardly, trying to break the tension you cocooned yourself in. If it was any other situation you would’ve found humor in what he said (and the way he said it) because you were standing alone in the dark corner of a stairwell like an absolute freak, but you needed just a single goddamn second to collect yourself without someone, him especially, meddling. 

“I just need a minute.” You shot your arm out, palm vertical to stop him from coming closer. Your forehead rested against the cool cinder blocks that made up the stairwell, trying to push down the wave of tears that tried to tsunami their way out of you. Your other palm was pressed against your mouth to stop the sob that was also building in your lungs, along with the nausea that accompanied the clenching of your stomach.  

Death wasn’t anything new in the ED, and it wasn’t new to you, but the brutal death of your neighbor’s seventeen year old kid? A kid you babysat when he was just a little shit, wreaking havoc in a way that only a nine year old boy could. A kid who thought it was so cool that you were going to be a doctor (when you were just a med student at the time). The same kid who wanted to follow in your footsteps — who busted his ass in high school so he could get accepted into a great pre-med program. That same kid who was now on his way to the morgue. 

The world was crueler than most people knew. 

All of his life —his achievements, his dreams and aspirations— were all for nothing because he was already hanging by a thread when the ambulance made it to the bay of the ED, and realistically you knew he wasn’t going to make it when you started working on him, but that didn’t stop you from trying with everything you had —pulling every trick you could from up your sleeve. 

Sometimes it just didn’t matter. 

Sometimes everything you had wasn’t enough. 

Sometimes when someone’s number is up, it’s up no matter how cruel and unfair it was. 

Young or old, rich or poor, good or bad. Death came for everyone. 

It didn’t matter how many chest compressions you did, how many times that bag pushed air into his lungs. It didn’t matter what was pumped into him. Still, you did everything you could —you knew that, but it was still devastating. 

Sometimes…that’s just the way it was. It didn’t make it hurt any less, even when the patient was a stranger. Every person you lost was somebody’s someone in some capacity, and you kept a space in your heart for them because you were the last person to hold their life in your hands in this plane of existence. 

“I became a doctor to help people —to make a difference.” Your voice broke as you spoke. Words vomited from your lips in a torrent you couldn’t stop, even though you wanted to. The last thing you wanted was for Jack Abbot to see you breaking down in real time over something you should be able to keep your spine straight over. You were seasoned, professional, but sometimes even the best broke.

“You do.” Jack said simply as he watched you with a small frown tugging his lips down. “You helped that family. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, but they knew you. Knew you did everything you could to save that kid.” He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his cargo pants. “They’re hurting right now, but knowing it was you who was with him in the end had to be a small comfort —that he wasn’t alone or with a stranger.” 

“Or they blame me for losing him.” You said as the air bounced from your lungs in an attempt to keep a sob at bay.

“They could, it’s not unusual for us to be the first brunt of grieving families.” He said with a shrug. “But you know you did everything to the best of your ability, of anyone’s ability.” He took slow steps forward like he was approaching a wild animal, his eyes trying to catch yours.

“Do not blame yourself for this. I checked the charts. No one was surviving that, not with the damage he had. The fact that he was still alive when he got here was a miracle in itself —you don’t need me to tell you that.” You nodded, eyes burning as they stared at the floor so you could try to bury the pain you felt. Jack felt a tightness in his chest when you finally looked up at him, eyes bloodshot with fat tears welled on your lash line under the dim, fluorescent lighting of the stairwell. He took a few more cautious steps forward until he has right in front of you.

“He was just about to turn eighteen. He got accepted into UPenn for undergrad last month.” You took a deep, shuddering breath. “He wanted to be a doctor.” Your voice got choked up. “He looked up to me, you know? He used to ask me every question under the sun about what I did, the good and the bad. The cool things I got to see.” You wiped under your eyes as Jack let you talk. “He wanted to be a doctor.” You repeated, scoffing through the tears that kept building. “I helped him study for the MCAT even though he wasn’t going to take it for a few years because he wanted to be prepared. I gave him every resource I had because he was really serious about it. The kid was smart, Jack. So goddamn smart. He could’ve made a difference.” You shook your head, biting your lip to keep your composure, shrugging apathetically. “And now he’s gone.”

“It’s tough,” Jack finally responded, tilting his head down slightly and rolling his eyes up to catch yours in a snare that you couldn’t escape. “You should’ve let me take him when you realized who was coming in.”

“I know.” You nodded, “but I didn’t have a second to hesitate. If he had a chance, I needed to act then and there. I know you know that.” He nodded, his hands releasing themselves from his pockets to cross over his chest. “Didn’t matter anyway.” 

“It always matters, even when you’re fighting a losing battle.” His hand came up to rest on your arm, lighting flames through your scrubs and straight through to your skin. He squeezed ever so slightly, a sign of silent comfort he knew you needed in that moment in the silent stairwell. You gave him a sad smile, letting him know you appreciated the gesture. The smile slowly fell with his hand as he returned it back to the pockets of his pants, but you noticed his hand clenching into a fist and unclenching when it was out of sight.  

“You gonna be alright?” He asked, his voice low and raspy as he never took his eyes off of you. You took a deep breath, releasing it with a nod. As unnerving as you used to think his eyes were, you didn’t feel that now. It was a lifeline, a preserver that was thrown out at sea to rescue you from a capsized vessel that was quickly taking in water.  

“Yeah, I just uh.” You cleared your throat, wiping your cheeks with the long sleeve of your undershirt. “I need to collect myself and I’ll be right back out there.” Jack studied you for a few moments, not believing you, but choosing not to comment on it all the same. 

“You sure?” He asked once more, giving you an out if you needed it. You stood up a little straighter, locking away the sorrow that filled your features just moments ago, and nodded. 

“The world keeps turning.” Was your answer. 

“Yeah…it does.” Jack breathed out. 

“We don't get the option to just stop. I’ll meet you back out there.” He nodded, brows creased together in thought before opening the door to the ED. Noise flowed into the small chamber, echoing up and up and up the ascension of stairs until you couldn’t differentiate any of the noise from one loud muffled sound. You watched as he left, the door closing slowly behind him as he resumed his duties like he never stopped to begin with. 

What the hell were you doing here?

please comment & reblog :)

[ironunderstands]

These Aventurine, Topaz and Jade comparisons are getting out of hand…

As much as I adore both of them, I think it’s very disingenuous to compare Aventurine and Topaz’s lore and be like “but they are the same!!!! If people like Aventurine and dislike Topaz that’s just misogyny!!! and like… no?

Topaz’s whole thing is that she doesn’t know the extent of the IPC’s evil, and believes that what she’s doing is genuinely the right thing to do. Even if she never had a choice in joining the IPC, she (incorrectly) believes what they did to her and her planet is justified, logical and moral, and for those reasons she stands with them. Part of this is likely IPC brainwashing, as she was probably very young when she became an indentured servant to them, and someone living on a planet on the brink of destruction would likely view anyone who stepped up to save them as heroes (imo the IPC likely waited for the point of no return to establish contact so her people had no other choice to except).

However Topaz got best end of the proverbial stick, her planet and its people were deemed useful by the IPC, and didn’t fight back, even if in the end they were still exploited.

Unfortunately, we have seen through Boothill, Belabog and Aventurine what happens when that isn’t the case.

Boothill’s planet got bombed and people genocided because they had a resource useful to the IPC, but were unwilling to cooperate with them or hand over their home, so the IPC decided to eradicate them.

Belabog had a debt owed to the IPC that was ridiculously high and very unfair to expect them to pay back, and had Topaz not convinced the higher ups to give them some time (which she got demoted for), the IPC would have taken Belabog by force

That leaves us with Aventurine, whose story is in no way on the same level of bad as Topaz’s. Unlike her, he has witnessed and experienced firsthand the truly awful shit the IPC can do.

They took custody of Sigonia and promised to offer the Avgin aid in their fight against the Katacans, at the very least protect them from harm. (Sidenote, since the IPC held control over Sigonia, they should have stopped the fighting in the first place). However, they simply stood by and did nothing, resulting in the deaths of around 6,000 Avgin, with around 3,000 went missing (or injured, I don’t remember, either way it’s bad).

But wait! It gets worse! Aventurine when he was still known as Kakavasha referred to the IPC as “the men in black/the men in black suits”, and his first master says he bought Aventurine from “the men in black/the men in black suits”, likely mocking the way he referred to them. Therefore THE IPC TOOK PART AND LIKELY EVEN CREATED A FUCKING SLAVE TRADE IN SIGONIA

Look being made into an indentured servant isn’t fun, but idk personally I’d take that any day of the week OVER BEING ENSLAVED

That’s not even to mention how horrible of a reputation Sigonian’s have in the galaxy, one likely spread by/resulting from the IPC themselves, as at least on Aventurines planet they do not have the mobility to make a name for themselves. (Honestly it’s a mini theory of mine that Aventurines scam is what partly contributed to this reputation, and his status as a slave is something the IPC conveniently left out in their broadcast about it-)

But, you might be saying, didn’t Aventurine have a choice to join the masked fools and leave the IPC, isn’t he free now? And to that I say, it’s complicated.

Considering the amount of suicidal shit Aventurine has done while being part of the IPC, he clearly hasn’t been having a fun time as a member of one, so why does he stick around, especially with the Fools invite? Even if he was a slave, does that absolve him of the crimes he’s committing now? What could justify his actions?

Revenge, plan and simple.

This is going to delve into some spoiler territory for the end of the Penacony 2.2 quest, something which I didn’t feel like mentioning earlier because I’m sorry but everyone and their mother already knows Boothill’s lore. Now, let’s get into it.

Aventurine accepts Jades offer to join the IPC, and when he becomes a Stoneheart, the first thing he asks about is the fate of the Avgin, to which he then learns that besides him, they are all dead. You see, from birth Kakavasha was pushed onto a pedestal as the savior of the Avgin, but now that there are no more Avgin to save, his primary motivator in becoming a Stoneheart (beyond not being enslaved anymore) is gone.

So what does he do now?

Simple, try to kill the motherfuckers behind it.

That’s why he takes on such risky gambles still, and why he wagers and wants Diamond to promote him to rank p46. The higher Aventurine gets the closer he gets to his goal of taking down the IPC for good.

Which is why his meeting with Boothill is so meaningful. I think Boothill is going to “kidnap” him and together they are gonna take down the wicked bitch that is Oswaldo Schneider for his literal crimes against humanity.

Mark my words, an IPC downfall is going to happen, and I think Topaz, Aventurine, Boothill and Ratio are going to be at the forefront of it.

However, Topaz and Ratio (and by extension the rest of the galaxy) have to learn/realize the true horrors of the IPC (although I can sense Ratio doesn’t really like them, and he’s learned a lot from Aventurine, I doubt he knows the full extent of the situation or is in any way happy about it). Therefore? Topaz mental breakdown arc? Ratio lore? PLEASE??!? The IP3 compliment one another so well and god I can’t wait for that to come to fruition.

I really want to see a Topaz and Ratio centered story leading up to an IPC smackdown, and I think we are gonna learn a lot more about how shitty they are in the later half of 2.2 and in 2.3 when the interlude and Jades release arrive.

As for the aforementioned Jade, she’s gonna need a Aventurine squared amount of trauma or reasoning behind her actions to seem in any way sympathetic, because right now she just seems like an evil bitch (in a semi good way, I will always respect the commitment to the bit) who loves her job and would make Machiavelli weep over how hard her ends are trying to justify her means.

[musashi]

w(h)ip wednesdayyyyy

here's some nonsense from chapter 2 of metal masquerade!!! which is about 10k words atm idk what my writing schedule is gonna be like with my laptop fucked (:

“While I’m here, then, Wright, I’ve some business with you.”

“Uh,” the idiot in question swallows loudly, “am I in trouble?”

“Hardly, though I do have a favour I’d like to ask…” 

Miles plods forward to pull him to the side, acting as though there is nothing else in the world worth his time, acting as though the crime scene is not fresh around them, acting as though the other two are not even there. 

Whatever business Miles has with that fool, Franziska is infuriatingly not privy to, as they walk off out of earshot and into their stupid little impromptu meeting room. Franziska doesn’t realize that she’s a hair shy of ripping a hole into her sleeve until Maya pipes up next to her, pointing at the furious folds in her blouse.

“How many of those big-ass sleeves do you deflate every year?”

Just like that, Franziska’s back down to reality. “Pardon?”

“You’re always fidgeting with your shirt like that,” says Maya. “Are those things made of titanium? How do you not rip them to shreds on the daily?”

“Incredible temperance of will,” says Franziska right back, and Maya’s air of sadness turns to something lighter, more bittersweet. She smiles a sad smile, snickers below her breath, and pointedly angles her line of sight toward Wright and Miles, chatting on the not-so-distant horizon.

Most certainly, they are no longer talking of anything businesslike. Wright is grinning a toothy grin, running his hands through his mess of raven hair, holding himself with a lackadaisical air that runs contrary to everything Franziska knows of him. Miles, in contrast, smiles privately to himself—dipping his head so that his overgrown bangs hide the scope of it, seemingly radiating an incorporeal sort of warmth, like a crackling hearth against what’s left of the snow. He offsets it by saying something dry and cutting, and Wright shuffles his expression to fond exasperation, and then they just sort of stare at each other for a too-long while. 

They are, in every sense of the phrase, flirting with each other.

“Gag me with a freakin’ spoon,” says Maya.

Indeed.

“I require no assistance from any proverbial utensil,” Franziska agrees. “This deplorable display is more than enough.”

Deplorable might not be a strong enough word. Really, the scene is disgustingly saccharine—the two of them giggling like the fools they are, pretending they’re talking about anything of importance, all the while surrounded in wilting rose bouquets and misshapen heart balloons? Any other couple might look idyllic and sweet, but the two of them? There’s nothing in the universe that can hope to invest Franziska in her little brother’s frightful taste in men. 

“D’you think they even know?” Maya asks as the two girls watch on the fringes, not looking at one another.

“Not a chance,” says Franziska, exhaling through her nose. “In the many years I have known him, Miles Edgeworth has—thankfully, for my sanity—shown no interest in any romantic exploits. I fear that without external force, he never will.”

“You fear?” Maya snorts.

“If I have to witness one more second of this miserable song-and-dance, I may lose what’s left of my self-control.”

“Ugh, right? Like, why are they both so stupid?”

“Scholars have been trying to get to the bottom of that singular truth for countless centuries, Maya Fey.”

Something in her chest feels… warm. A nervous jitter she hadn’t noticed was even there, melting where it lives and spilling into her nerves. Back to normal, it whispers, but Franziska isn’t rightly sure what the irregularity was in the first place.

“D’You think that if you and I put our heads together,” Maya’s saying, “and tried to puzzle out a way to get them to just kiss and get it over with, we wouldn’t have to deal with this garbo anymore?”

“Oh, most certainly.” Franziska finally looks at her—a side eye, but an eye nonetheless—with a knowing smile pulling at her lips. “Clever as we both are, I’m sure we could work our magic and force the bumbling lovebirds together.”

“Oh yeah?” Maya’s own side-eye turns into a proper look, her head turned and hanging where she’s bent at one-fourth, her hair like a sprawling black curtain falling toward the ground. “Well then, whaddya say, Fran? You wanna flex your stellar wingmanning skills and get your fruity brother some?”

It’s a struggle not to actually retch. Why did she have to phrase it like that? Because she was Maya Fey, of course, but still.

“Franziska. And I would rather scoop my eyes out with a melon baller than engage in anything residing in the same zip code as what you have just described.”

“Samesies. Wanna ditch?”

For some reason, Franziska expects there to be another word after that. Rather, something more fitting to punctuate it—a laugh, an admission that she’s just kidding, something of that sort. When no such epilogue follows, Franziska finally turns to face Maya Fey fully, and she’s just… standing there, expectantly, with that mischievous look on her face. Crooked grin, dimpling cheeks, arched brow, big, dark brown eyes that seem to sparkle with that glint of devilishness. 

“Excuse me?”

“You, me, getting the hell outta dodge.” Maya waves a hand. “What, you wanna sit here and wait for them to finish their weird eye-fucking session?”

“Absolutely not!” Franziska says before Maya can finish the last word. The girl in question snickers, louder this time.

“Exactly. So let’s ditch.” She gestures behind her shoulder with a sideways thumbs-up. “Edgeworth’s house is like four blocks away, right? Let’s bounce back to our stomping grounds for a bit. I bet they won’t even notice we’re gone.”

Franziska studies Maya’s expression, as though she will find her answer within it. Discovering no such thing, then, she casts a glance back over to the lovesick clowns and their uninspired circus routine. That aura of wonder from a few days before falls back over Franziska’s shoulders like a strange, ineffable veil—Maya intends to lead her somewhere on a whim, once more. And, once more, Franziska finds she is curious enough to follow.

There are more questions she has, of course—go back to Miles’ house and do… what? Running them over in her head, though, she finds those questions need not be verbalized until much later. Whatever frivolous leisure Maya plans to bring, Franziska knows with utmost certainty it will be more pleasure than watching her brother canoodle with Phoenix Wright.

Her work here is done, in any case. There’s no point in lingering when the case is airtight, no point in messing with perfection. Franziska lifts her briefcase once, twice, testing its weight in her hand to better balance her gait. That settled, then, she turns on one heel and begins walking toward the mouth at the end of the parking lot.

“Very well,” says Franziska, and she hears Maya scuttle excitedly into form behind her, wooden sandals clunking on the cracking sidewalk. “But I will be giving you no more late nights, Maya Fey. I expect you to vacate the premises before seven PM so that I may get the proper amount of rest to crush your pet fool in trial tomorrow.”

At her side, Maya’s off-kilter steps strike an odd harmony against the uniformity of Franziska’s own. “You go to bed at seven? You freakin’ pilgrim.”

“Of course not,” Franziska says, “I go to bed at eight. The extra hour is for pre-sleep preparations and routine hygiene.”

“Sorry, my bad, Miss-Freakin’-Pilgrim.”

Franziska doesn’t know what to say to any of that, and so she simply huffs and continues walking, hot breath turning to a disappearing cloud around her.

[kirasworldofwords]

I feel like it’s pretty damn easy to name something bad about any F1 driver, idk why it has to be an Olympics? Yeah they’ve all done bad things at some point, they’re out of touch rich men, that doesn’t mean people can’t be upset about racism and erasure their driver faces??? Idk if this wording makes sense but I am on your side

It does make sense, don't worry, lol. Thank you for the support! I have genuinely no idea why people are so pressed that I'm just trying to protect a ship fandom's established name, so much so they have to harass me over it.

Yep, they're all out of touch. You know why? Because they're literally the 20 richest men driving the world's fastest cars in one of the most dangerous sports that has the potential to kill you at any given time. They got the looks, they got the money, they got the girls... Why should they care what they talk about, laugh at and do?

And yes, I'm mad as all shit that Checo is just getting erased. Because this wouldn't be the first time, but it for sure was the time that was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. Now, I'm the whitest white to ever white, coffee creamer and Irish people are jealous of me, and I'm nowhere near being Irish. Still I find it to be important to stand up against the sheer waves of hate POC drivers get, even if one's own nationality and/or race has dogshit to do with the driver's nationality and/or race. I will not sit by idly and watch as fans from some mediocre white guy from yet another first world country (I know, I know, rich coming from me but don't lose me here) just go like: "Oh, look, this name over there fits our pookie-wookie-bear and the other person we ship him with!" - and then it's a name that has already been in use for another fandom's ship for perhaps already more than a decade (which is the case for Chewis, mind you, their journey started in 2012). It just so happens that the other person their special little corny coffee whiter snowflake is being shipped with in that fandom is no one of significance to them - in their eyes, to anyone because they're not as popular, not as "good-looking", which is subjective anyway, I mean, have you seen Checo? There's a very good reason why he has five kids, and you can't say it's all solely for the money, I'm begging you.

They're also not significant because they're not white, oftentimes. We can't deny that a subtle whiff of racism and prejudice is in this mix as well - we do, after all, still have a significant racism, sexism and queerphobia problem in our community as a whole. You cannot tell me in good faith that none of the Lewclerc shippers knew that Checo has been the actual second part to Chewis long before Charles even debuted in F1 and thus made an honest mistake, because I call fucking bullshit. It's well-known that Checo's been getting shit from all directions, especially the racist directions and especially especially towards the end of his career with Red Bull due to his lack of podiums (which I'm by the way still convinced were not his fault, the RBR mechanics have admitted it themselves that he had a worse car than Max - I shall die on this hill, and if I die alone there). So to be fairly honest, a revelation like that would not surprise me in the slightest. Not at all. It was another well-known fact that many Charles stans hated Checo's guts, too, for whatever fucking reason. Many hardcore fans of other drivers hated him, regular fans, too. I don't differentiate, because why should I? But this isn't about others, this is about Charles stans who don't know when to drop it.

So if you're a regular fan of Charles and you made it to this point, congrats, I don't mean you. Don't feel attacked.

This still doesn't justify just erasing his name and substituting it for Charles' name in the ship name Chewis, however. Have some respect for other fandoms. Rant over.

Now I hope I made sense here, because this turned out to be much more word salad than I intended it to be, lmao. Oops.

[exclamationpayne]

I know shipping opinions are kinda dangerous territory sometimes but I wanna share some ships I never really thought too hard about (because Trobed is my OTP and any variation of it has taken over entirely) but that I like anyway because idk. I have nothing else to share lol

Most obvious is going first:

Troy x Annie: I feel like not letting them have a chance really deprived the audience (or maybe just me lmao) of some interesting moments. I thought Annie's crush was so cute (Maybe Alison Brie just did that so well because she pines adorably idk) and I was waiting for the moment when she'd admit it. Like for her it'd this monumental character moment and Troy just shrugs and is like sure because he only knows her from her high school rep but gets to know her and genuinely likes her even of at the start he'd just be going a long with it. I also like the jock x nerd trope soooo...yeah lol

I never wanted to see them together more than when Troy admitted he read her dairy then he opened his arms declaring his love for butt stuff. WHAT DID SHE WRITE? (This moment is also why I like troybedison. I am a simple person, I see potential or my favs then I ship).

Also, we never see Troy get anywhere with anyone so this would've been a cute blip moment with them to give this supposed mega popular football star dude one successful...date? He never gets that in the show and it baffled me to no end (even though there were little throw away lines of dates he'd been on) even if his prior self was an act but I digress.

Shirley x Jeff: I always saw potential with this ship. I think Shirley and Jeff kind of balance each other in a different way that I find appealing. S01E04 was cute to me when they bond over making fun of Vaughn. Not that that's nice but they were like two gossiping friends flowing so naturally when Jeff stopped being so guarded and saw Shirley was more than "a nice mom" lol She is also supportive of him but he also doesn't take her crap and she doesn't take his and they call each other out in their own way. I forgot what episode it was in S01 but when the group came to terms that though they were "like family" they actually aren't and can date whoever and they all look at each other with varying degrees of intrigue, interest, shock or disgust lmao I thought it meant we'd see some crazy shit but nah, it's stayed fairly predictable. Shirley saying Jeff as a nice ass just had me go somewhere like "gurl, you nasty lol Tell me more".

Anyway, they are around the same age and they are alike in a lot of ways but also so different due to experiences and I think both can be better? I felt this way since S01 and then S03's reveal back when they were kids I really thought "how had they not explored this even surface level?" And I know she was his bully in that but idk where I was going with that but if they never did anything that would've been like the proverbial ice breaker and if they did a challenge. Either way they were raw and exposed and had to figure that out to stay friends and were stronger together. I wish they let Shirley stay single so she could've had chances with other characters or something.

Britta x Annie: Can I be real, S02E15 is to blame for this and I never went back after it. Annie seemed like a character who didn't know herself (as admitted in S02E10) or what she wanted and seemed to be trying to figure that out. Whose to say she's strictly straight. Her and Britta bump heads but she had no qualms with trying to kiss Britta that night and Britta had to snap her out of it. The potential of her arc and self-discovery would've been pretty cool even if Britta was the doorstep to that threshold. Instead of chasing Jeff she should've gained a curious crush on Britta imo and learned something about herself lol The age gap is still like 10 years (Annie is 18 at the start and Britta is 28) but that's still less than Jeff and the show has no problem with these gaps so...but also, Annie wanted someone older and mature and while Britta changed overtime she started as more mature than Jeff. Idk, I have ship brain I guess.

Abed x Jeff: S01 really gives them good chemistry and while Troy and Annie are a thing I can see this happening because they had a lot of good scenes together (getting wasted together, the editor thing Jeff was doing, pottery class, etc) and they confide in each other. Or rather Jeff confides in Abed a lot. I think S02E19 is a great episode that also made me go "hmm, I see it fr" lol I like how Jeff has a soft spot for Abed and at times makes him happy by going with a bit for no other reason than Abed likes it even if he has his limits. It's cute. Jeff would be challenged at every corner because Abed does not have the same hang ups and isn't emotionally constipated lol I think Jeff would be his most vulnerable with Abed for a myriad of reasons.

~~~

I...think that's it but idk Sorry for this essay about ships. Late night thoughts because writing fics is difficult but mentally regurgitating feels about ships is easy lol If it's not obvious, I multi-ship so I'm cool with playing dolls with characters to make them kiss lol Always have been in every fandom I decided to participate in. I will always have the OTP/OT3 that are top tier investment but I can appreciate a lot of ships outside of that. Even "crack ships" where the characters never meet in canon or maybe they do but never have anything meaningful. Half the time it's just me pitting my favs together anyway but canon justification is just a plus but not a necessity.

As of this post isn't long enough here's a bonus: friendship dynamics I wanted more of:

I'll start with the one I stated before on a separate post:

Shirley + Abed: Really cute friendship that I really wanted to see blossom more. I wrote a lot about it already here so not going to repeat but this was a wasted dynamic. Especially after Troy leaves and Abed learns that she watches horror movies. I mean, COME ON MAN.

Shirley + Britta: I saw some cut scenes where they have more scenes together and I feel like Britta was always meant to challenge Shirley and vice versa and their friendship leads them to better understanding each other. Like with Abed Shirley gets to come to terms with her flaws like being judgmental (she's the harshest with Britta like S03E04 in an alt timeline but I think since they do this with Annie that's probably why some scenes with Britta is cut.

I kind of would've liked to see them reach an understanding and Shirley learns to let go a little and Britta gain perspective and some confidence she severely lacks and made most obvious by her insecure demeanor throughout the series, especially when made fun of, S03 with her ex and again in S05E04 during the polygraph we learn that she hates herself. The idea that Britta hates herself stings and I think Shirley could've helped her gain some self-esteem (as a friend, not a mom) like in S01 with the bathroom thing. Same with how she deals with her ex, Blade, in S03 (instead of Troy aiding her, being validated by friendship with Shirley seems better to me than another guy/relationship but that's just me). Britta seemed to lack guidance and used "not like other girls" mentality to shield herself like she does with preformative activism, etc.

Idk, they underutilized Shirley in general so don't be surprised to see her name a few times lol

Shirley + Annie: They have moments, more so than her and Abed, but unless my memory is just holding out on me they didn't have a lot after S01. They are very similar and seem like sisters, even when they fight lol Idk, I like how they interact with each other and like Jeff Annie calls Shirley out and it's not a bad thing. Reminds me of how sometimes you have to call out that family member who still says sketchy shit but are unaware it's sketchy for whatever reason. That aside they are cute working together, like the S01 V-day episode to get back at Change and when they were campus security together and stopped fighting and built each other up by the end. Just women solidarity, I love to see it.

Shirley + Jeff: See, I told you she'd pop up again lmao Kind of the same with Annie, I think she has an interesting dynamic with him be barely get to see or get any development for. It's like in spurts but sporadically and far between. I'm not going to get over in S01 she pulled a brownie out of her bag and gave it to Jeff to calm him down lol Am I insane to find tiny moments like that cute? I cling to moments like this with characters. Some of my fav shi is little character moments.

Pierce + Gilbert: I really like Gilbert. When he came back for S04 in the most insane way possible I liked it. I know why we didn't get more of this (probably behind the scenes drama stuff and paying Giancarlo Esposito lol) but I'd have liked to see them grow closer as siblings since they missed their entire lives together as brothers. Both dealing with trauma left behind by the same racist, bigoted, misogynistic, asshole of a man, their father no less. Would've been nice to see them reach peace even if in little spurts/mentions idk Maybe I'm just a sucker for Giancarlo too because he rules and any character he plays I want maximum screen time but also I really do like Gilbert. His moment in at the end of the Halloween episode in S04 was one of the better ones in that season imo

Evil!Abed and Troy: I say "and" instead of "+" because not looking for a friendship dynamic with them but interaction in general. I 100% understand that evil Abed was a thing because Troy left for the AC school but he didn't originate there. He first appeared in S03E04 technically (though the worst timeline that he manifests is when Troy is absent from the group) but again in S03E12 after his altercation with Troy about the impersonators. It still has to do with Troy again though in a different context I find so interesting. Like, when their friendship is challenged bro has an evil version to deal with it (or not deal with it tbh). When Abed has to come to terms that Troy isn't always going to agree with him. I think it would've been interesting for Troy to see Evil!Abed while Abed has to come to terms that Troy is his own person and will disagree with him and expect him to give in their friendship too. I know we get that immediately after with the Pillow and Blankets war but I mean still, I can easily imagine Evil!Abed was the one who sent that email, giving commands to his 'troops' lol Am I insane to consider this? Not to take accountability from Abed (because they are both him obviously) because Abed can be so casually callous/cruel sometimes without meaning to and sometimes he does. I just think it'd have been cool if Troy had a chance to confront him, this side of him, but it's not really a thing after S03 (that makes sense anyway...). Idk, maybe I'm just talking out of my ass. It's 3am, just high on sleep deprivation and Community rn.

[gigglesandfreckles-hp]

commentary/ramblings/director's cut of omtnwf chapters 2-5 below the cut!

HAHA this is NOT supposed to be there. i guess it makes enough sense...but this is from an earlier version of omtnwf that never had them actually get together at hogwarts at all! it was obviously a very different story altogether but i guess i never edited this part to reflect that oops. i'm going to pretend it reads as dumbledore being cheeky with his "you two were once rather good friends" instead of "multiple members of my staff have seen you half-naked around this school"

okay yes thereeee we go albus. much better.

the first of the seventh year secrets unravelling!!! i've gotten quite a few questions about how the internship being revoked plays into their story and the truth is, it doesn't really...not in the larger sense or beyond what we see here. it serves first and foremost as an early example of the half-truths that were happening toward the end of jily 1.0. and also reinforces the reasons lily turned toward the order. it's another layer of discrimination she was facing at the end of school that she never told james about. it feels more momentous in chapter 2 when it's mentioned because it's the only concrete thing we know she kept from him. in the grand scheme, though...there's not much more to the story there. she just simply didn't tell him. one more straw on the proverbial camel's back that led to their ultimate demise.

i have no idea why i made lily irritated here 😆 james's shock is personally reasonable considering she's been a covert member. c'mon lil cut our boy some SLACK

i actually love this bit of reveal that james was planning to propose. it feels sooo long ago because we've now seen the lead-up and both the immediate and long-term effects of said proposal. we've even seen the proposal! but here's where it all started. happy, naive james...about three months away from one of the worst days of his life.

i have actually warred with this bit for so long. i regret teasing their first encounter with voldy here because i have the perfect place for it as a flashback of it's own in a waaaay later chapter, but i didn't think of that until i'd long posted this chapter...which shows too much of the interaction between jily and voldy to revisit the scene later. ah well.

second only to my james potter sunshine motifs are my lily evans elemental motifs. james consistently notices things about lily and compares them to various facets of the elemental world. this is because i see james as being very grounded within nature due to his being an animagus! i like to imagine he has a keen understanding and perception of the natural world around him. the trees, the grass, the earth, the wind, etc. thus...his admiration of lily frequently takes the form of elemental metaphors!

this 1983 sirius intro is probably my favourite character intro of the fic! he's such a grumpy bastard. but immediately...they can't help it!!! james and lily unite to tease him. i love the natural little slotting back into their old trio dynamic (which is special to me) even in the midst of all the Big Feelings happening between all three of them. also this is embarrassing but this scene, especially the "do you promise to be good?" bit was inspired by that scene in national treasure when abigail first ends up in the van with ben and riley (and the declaration of independence lol) and the banter between the three in the "she won't be any trouble. see? she's curious" exchange just screams jilypad to me in a way i can't quite explain. idk i told y'all i was mad okay?!?!

the fact that this isn't even the only time james uses lily's beltloop for Plot. what can i say!!! i'm a girl of very specific taste!

i literally laboured over this scene wondering it was too soon for them to break the touch barrier and then i had to get a hold of myself because this isn't a regency era fic!!!

he makes me LAUGH. he's so cool and composed but i know and you know, WE ALL KNOW, that he's freaking the freak out on the inside. "the milk will sour" SHUT UP!!!!!!

[sexhaver]

independent of the current discussion about AI art, one of my foundational political beliefs is that trying to stuff proverbial genies (i.e. automation tech like the automatic loom/printing press/warehouse robots/AI art programs) back into proverbial bottles is a noble but inevitably losing fight at best and downright reactionary at worst/on average. ironically playing Talos Principle 2 has really driven this home for me because the entire plot centers around an allegory for the story of Prometheus stealing fire from the gods to give to humans, but instead of fire it's the ability to violate thermodynamics to create mass and energy out of nothing. and the game keeps trying to frame the decision of what to do with this tech as a huge moral and ethical dilemma, and i keep not getting why im supposed to feel conflicted. "the gods themselves are warning you against it!" damn, they sound like dumbasses. "members of your utopian society are conflicted on what to do!" okay so some of them are wrong. "here's some audio logs showing that misuse of the technology killed someone by accident!" great! now we know what not to do to avoid that! "are you really so full of hubris that you think you can avoid the same mistakes as your forebears?" uh, yeah, they wrote down their mistakes for a reason. like idk why people on here keep being surprised that i support technological advancement for the sake of advancement and THEN critique how it sucks under capitalism specifically instead of just declaring it (say it with me now) Ontologically Evil. i spent 5 years in college majoring in robotics/CS and worked in warehouse/biomed automation for another 5. do you really expect me to entertain literal Luddite rhetoric? be serious

[cartoonsbrainrot]

How 'bout more "Roses And Cinder"? Sounds good? Splendid!

Everything started at an after-party following the engagement party of Hercules and Megara; Zeus wanted something else, on top of the event at the mortal couple's residence, so up on Olympus we go! (I'm still debating whether or not Herc and Meg will be allowed to join the Gods this one time or not; or if they wanted to take part in this or not. Either way, the Gods are celebrating for them from dusk till dawn.)

Everyone is invited, including Hades. (despite what he did, he's still familiar after all; That, and Zeus is sort of trying to rub it in that his brother's plot failed by inviting him to see everything thriving and having a good time.) And Hades comes to the party just to show everyone that he's still there, he's unaffected by his loss (a total lie) and doesn't feel any remorse for what he did (this part is true).

And then there's Persephone, who's being dragged around the grounds of Olympus and forced to mingle with the "approved" suitors her mother has in store for her. The party would have been great (and she was looking forward to it), but Demeter's constant presence at her side made Persephone wish she would have stayed at home.

By chance this two cross paths while trying to avoid the other Gods (Hades running away from his brothers; Persephone ditching her mother) and they start talking about the people in their lives and complain about their situations. That's when Persephone's proverbial light bulb lights up; She knows exactly how to fix both of their issues!

Hades wants his brothers' (and everyone else's) eyes off of him, and access to Olympus. Meanwhile, Persephone wants freedom to go wherever she wants without Demeter hovering and pushing her to go on "dates" with the likes of Ares and other "eligible bachelors". So what better way to get rid of all of that, than to make everyone think they're dating? It's perfect! (in that moment, at least)

Hades gets to use Persephone as an excuse to be on Olympus, and Persephone gets to use Hades as a "chaperone" (tho not really one) and shield against her supposed suitors.

[Yes, I tried to color code the whole thing; idk why. Feedback is appreciated :)]

[duck-in-a-thrift-store]

Prologue? Pilot? IDK Man I Just Work Here

part 1.1

{hello and welcome to the very first chapter of the full house au. i know @moreover-clover and @redley-of-many-noodles offered to beta this fic for me; i appreciate that and i may very well take you up on it for later chapters, but tbh i have homework that really needs to get done and i will not be able to focus on anything else until i get this out of the way, so... hopefully its not terrible i guess. that said, i did initially start writing this in past tense and then decided to do it in present instead, so if anyone notices a typo/tense error, feel free to point it out so i can fix it lol

trigger warning for mentions of injuries and death

now without further ado...}

~~~

Stumbling past the automatic glass doors, covered in blood- but is it his own? Or does it belong to the barely conscious man he’s dragging along beside him?

Probably both.

The bright white lights overhead burn his eyes and the sharp sterile scent of chemicals does the same to his nose- this is not a pleasant place to be, but it’s the only place to be right now. It’s their only hope of not losing yet another person to this alternate dimension shit that’s been plaguing their lives for three years.

Seeing Eddie’s crumpled, torn-apart body in the Upside Down, watching Dustin sob over him- that had been bad enough. They may have had almost matching wounds, but Eddie’s were deeper, and there were twice as many of them, and, god, that could have been him, it should have been him.

Dustin’s devastated and the world is ending and we’ve lost someone else and dammit didn’t I tell him not to be a hero?

But then he’d found a pulse. The faintest flutter, but it was there, and it spurred him right back into action, adrenaline pumping overtime through his veins even as he was ready to collapse. Both of them might well be on death’s door, but they had hope.

And then, just as they made it back through the gate, they had gotten the call over the walkie about Max.

The panic and despair threatened to settle back over him, driving him into the ground with its weight. He had been trying so hard to keep her safe since they realized she was Vecna’s next target, and now…

They were supposed to meet up at the hospital, so that’s where he went. He has to see the kids and he has to keep Eddie breathing and maybe just maybe he’ll get a chance to get his own wounds looked at, if there’s time. Robin will never forgive him if he lets rabies take him out.

So he and Dustin have Eddie slung between them, barreling clumsily through the Hawkins ER like a lopsided bull in a proverbial china shop while everyone else stares on in confusion and horror at the state they’re in. If anyone recognizes the fallen king or the target of the ongoing manhunt, they don’t say anything, and for that one tiny thing in the long and awful list of what’s happened today, he’s grateful.

There are, however, voices aimed in his direction, lilted up at the end in interrogation, but he can’t afford to think right now; he can only keep moving forward, giving weakly shouted answers to questions that go in one ear and out the other. His mind is clouded with fear and the desperation to get all his important people back together in one room so he can see that they’re all still alive. If they aren’t, if someone is missing, if Max doesn’t make it, if no one will treat Eddie-

He’s vaguely aware that he’s begging at this point, but he doesn’t care. His brain is too busy listing.

Robin, Nancy, Erica, Lucas- they’re together, they’re with Max. The Byers are all the way in California; Mike is probably on his way back right now- what a mess to come home to. Dustin- he’s with me. Safe. Eddie- also with me, not safe, probably dying.

They may not have known each other long, but he does feel tears prick his eyes at the thought- they had literally marched into hell together, after all. A nurse offers him a tissue- when did they get here? When did he sit down? And why is the room spinning like the Starcourt ceiling last July?

He doesn’t get an answer to any of his questions, doesn’t even get to voice them, before the room is going dark and Dustin’s frantic voice at his side is sounding further and further away, until everything goes quiet.

~~~

The silence is broken by a harsh ringing noise, followed by muffled voices, the latter growing clearer as the former slowly fades out. He knows those voices.

He jolts upright, sending a sharp trail of pain through his lacerated torso, but is momentarily distracted by the fact that he had somehow wound up in a hospital bed between blacking out and waking up. As soon as his mind catches up to speed on his new whereabouts, he looks wildly around the room- not exactly a typical hospital room, but that hasn’t registered yet- taking stock of every face he can see, every voice he can hear.

To his immense relief- and also confusion- he sees Max in a bed just like his right across from him, Lucas and El at her side. She’s in bad shape, but she appears to be alive, at least.

Thank god. Wait- El? What is she doing here?

The next thing he sees is the entire Byers family- plus two extra guys, one of whom looks familiar but way paler and thinner and more beaten up than Steve remembers- squeezed onto a couch at the far end of the room.

Weren’t they in California? And- hold on- is that Hopper? Isn’t he dead?

Wait.

Am I dead?

Before he can have an existential crisis, though, something snaps him out of it. A hand on his shoulder, rougher than he would have liked, to be honest, but grounding. Dustin- who he realizes must have been sleeping in the chair between him and the next bed over- has just woken up in time to catch him doing the same, and the kid looks thrilled. Exhausted, emotionally drained, but thrilled.

“Steve! Guys, he’s awake!”

All eyes turn his way, just about everyone accounted for, it seems, and somewhere in the back of his mind he wonders how Robin and all the kids got here with their usual chauffer currently out of action. But then he notices something else. Something that honestly shouldn’t be as startling as it is, considering everything else going on.

All the parents are here too. And they look… well, about how they can be expected to look, given the circumstances.

“Good, I’m glad you’re alright,” says Karen Wheeler, arms crossed over her chest, menacing gaze sweeping the room. “Because my son came home in the back of a pizza van, begging us to take him to the hospital, where apparently you and two of his other friends have been half-dead all night in the middle of these so-called ‘earthquakes,’ and I’d really like an explanation. From all of you.”

~~~

The room was dead silent, the parents staring in wide-eyed shock as the long-winded, traumatic narrative drew to a close.

“So… I guess you guys need some time to process all that, huh?”

Dustin’s question was met with a sudden cacophony of returning inquiries, sharp and frantic and tinged with bewilderment, overlapping one another in their haste. It was hard to tell who said what through the haze of whatever painkillers they put in his IV.

“How the hell did we not know about any of this?”

“Hawkins is cursed?”

“Why didn’t any of you say anything?”

“All this has been going on under our noses for years?”

He had been expecting disbelief, accusations of letting their imaginations run away from them, but… their tale connects a few too many dots, makes a little too much sense, considering how strange and malevolent life has become in their formerly sleepy little town.

“Are- are you guys- mad?” Will asks, even though he, out of all of them, has the least to worry about.

Before any of them could answer, Mike jumps in, “Because, if you are, that’s really not fair, we’ve sorta been through a lot as it is-”

“And that’s exactly why we’re mad- no- furious. Our kids have been going through hell right in front of us and we had no idea! Of course we’re going to be upset about it! You guys could have died, and we would have had no idea what happened!”

“Well, yeah, I guess, but- we didn’t. We’re fine, mom…”

“You are absolutely not fine. After everything you just told us about? There’s no way you could possibly be fine. This whole thing is so far outside the realm of fine.”

There’s a heavy pause after that; it’s not like anyone can disagree with her. When no response comes, she turns her fierce, teary eyes on the older teens.

“What about you guys? You- Steve, Jonathan, Nancy- you’ve known about all this the whole time! Why didn’t you tell us? Why didn’t you come to us for help?” It sounds like an accusation, and yet… there’s more pain in her voice than anything. Her targets wince, crumple, while Robin and Argyle- whoever that is- just sort of awkwardly shuffle about off to the side, none of them meeting Mrs. Wheeler’s gaze.

It's Joyce who ends up breaking the tense silence.

“In their defense, Karen, Hop and I knew about all this too. The thing is- we weren’t allowed to tell anyone.”

Having become one of her anger’s new targets, Hopper quickly explains, “The Hawkins lab freaks made us sign a bunch of NDAs, take a vow of silence on the whole matter, basically. It was the only way to get them to cooperate. If we had gone around telling people, we could’ve put everyone in even more danger. And besides, before now, would you have even believed us? If we had told you there were monsters like something out of a sci-fi movie hunting folks down, taking over minds, opening portals to another dimension- right in the middle of Hawkins?”

“Would you have believed your kids?” Joyce adds softly, addressing all her fellow moms in the room.

At that, Karen deflates. She exchanges a look with Sue and Claudia, and speaks for all of them when she says, “I… I guess not. I want to say I would have, but… it’s all too crazy. If we hadn’t seen what we saw today, and if you all didn’t have each other backing up your story, well… honestly, I would have thought you were making it up.” Apparently the Wheelers had almost driven right into one of the rifts- one of the very obviously otherworldly rifts- on their way here. Well, they had to find out somehow.

“And that’s another reason we couldn’t tell you. We didn’t want you to think we were crazy,” Nancy explains.

Lucas tacks on, “We also didn’t want you to send El back to the lab, or to any other messed up place that would lock her up and hurt her.”

El nods seriously, a fearful expression flashing across her face as she takes a step back, bumping into Max's bed. Lucas places a reassuring hand- the one not occupied with holding Max's- on her shoulder.

“Oh- honey, no, we would never do that. Don’t worry. We actually owe you a lot, it sounds like; I can’t thank you enough for saving my children’s lives. You’ll always be safe with us, as far as I’m concerned.”

“But that’s the thing,” Susan interjects, not taking her watery eyes off her comatose daughter. “They’re not safe, none of them are, not here. And they haven’t been for a long time, it seems. I don’t know when they will be safe. I hate to say it, but I don’t think our kids should stay in Hawkins.”

This triggers a rush of protests from the kids, voices once again blending in a way that’s difficult for Steve to keep up with.

“But- but Hawkins needs us! Now more than ever!”

“Yeah! We have to stay and fight!”

“We can’t just let Vecna have our town!”

Hopper motions for everyone to settle down. “Listen, kids. I know you want to help, but you’ve been fighting this battle for too long as it is. You all never should have been involved in something so dangerous in the first place.”

“Right, what he said. I mean, you’re just kids, for god’s sake!” Claudia adds in, although she still looks mostly stunned by everything she’s just found out about.

“This is not your responsibility. We’ll stay here and fight, and you all will get somewhere safe, somewhere far away from all this.”

This does indeed sound like a direct order from their returned-from-the-dead resident chief of police. What comes next, though, is much gentler, fatherly, and he’s definitely looking right at El when he says it.

“Let us take it from here, okay?”

~~~

{i decided to break this up into 2 parts; idk when ill post the second half but it should be fairly soon. also dont know when ill put it up on ao3 as i dont currently have an account there, but im definitely planning to bc with as much as i have planned for this au so far its going to be a pain in the ass to read it all here lmao

edit: its going to be 3 parts instead of 2

Link to part 1.2 here}

[diamondcitydarlin]

In the midst of all this political insanity I've been sort of curious about how members of the cult perceive what's going on (somewhat against my better judgement) and I get a lot of opportunities on my neighborhood FB page as I live in a very politically divided rural community of weirdo/artist/hippy types and big time MAGATs that have Trump iconography plastered all over their houses and lawns etc, so there's a lot of arguing back and forth. And I know this probably isn't new information to a lot of people, but it just continues to stun me how obstinate these people are in defending their 'great leader' even when provided with concrete evidence and receipts that directly contradict what they believe to be true. Like, no matter how logical and rational the argument is, no matter the sources cited, these people continue to insist, over and over, that it's not real, that no critical evidence against Mango Mussolini could ever possibly be real or true, even if they themselves have no evidence or sound argument why it isn't apart from the refusal to believe. Like, 'hey you realize there's a very good chance he'll take away your medicare and social security, right? Here's a million links proving this, pick whichever one to look at if you feel some sources aren't credible' and they just dig their heels in and scream 'NO! FAKE NEWS! IT'S NOT REAL!' while, again, providing no evidence to debunk it whatsoever other than yelling/typing in caps and what they personally believe to be true. It really feels like watching someone put their head in a hungry gator's mouth and when everyone around them is saying 'No, don't do that, the gator will bite your head off!' they just say 'NO HE WON'T, BECAUSE I DON'T BELIEVE HE WILL', as if the power of belief alone will stop this starved, wild animal known for eating people from eating them, or watching someone about to jump off a cliff because they obstinately believe they'll sprout wings and fly (again, no reason outside of their own mind to believe that to be true). It's very childish/infantile in a lot of ways, like this how I thought about things when I was idk 4 or 5? You know, like thinking if I went into the water and said a spell I made up that I'd turn into a mermaid or something. It makes me wonder if, god forbid, the fascists are successful in actually taking away the cult members' healthcare and livelihood if they'll still be singing his praises while losing their homes, living on the street and/or dying from a preventable illness? Is there a threshold to this at all or is everyone still loyal to him ready to essentially be murdered on his altar (and not even quickly, but a long, slow, drawn out death)? And if so, what's the point in being so loyal to him at all? What's the point if he's just going to sacrifice you along with everyone else you hate for no real reason other sadism? What, in their minds, are they possibly getting out of this at all? Is it really worth literally one's entire life to be enabled in bigotry for five minutes and 'own the libs'? (Can someone tell them we're 'owned' now, we're fully 'owned', can we stop the insanity please??) I know to some extent it's got to be a perfect storm of lack of proper education, refusal to accept being duped and insidious bigotry and hatred, but even then it's kind of wild to me how much those things alone keep them running full-tilt into the human meat machine without a one single second thought. I used to think, in our capitalist oligarchal society, that money spoke the loudest, but even under the real possibility of losing theirs the cult members don't waver. Idk, I guess they just really don't see it that way, they just cannot and will not perceive any possibility that the proverbial leopard will eat their face too and I'm not sure they will even when it does.

I also saw a clip today of a guy interviewing a cult member and asking him what he'd do to a guy that had purposefully walked in on young girls changing, what he'd do to a guy that said several things Dear Leader has said and the cult member said 'beat his ass ofc', and then the interviewer revealed to him that those were all things his idol had said and done, and suddenly the cult member switched up and accused the interviewer of taking things "out of content", yet when it was 'just some guy' that had done those things the "content" didn't matter at all somehow. So it's fine if Dear Leader violates children? It's fine if Dear Leader says creepy, sexual things about his own daughter? If Dear Leader told this guy it was fine to molest children and to do it immediately, would he??!??! The thought alone is terrifying and I'm not certain the answer would be 'definitely not'.

Idk, again, I know a lot of this has been going on since 2016 and isn't some new breakthrough in their collective psychology but it continues to stun me how much these people are willing to sacrifice for so very little in return- their principles, their dignity, their money, their health, their lives. The chokehold this ridiculous clown of a man holds over them needs to be studied in depth by the world's top psychologists someday.

[runthepockets]

abt your men being proverbially shit on post: i mean i agree sorta, bioessentialism is unhelpful and hurtful, and rn you see a lot of shit from cis women abt how men cant help but be bad people etc. and that kinda shit is not helpful at all. but i agree w the person who replied to that post too. i mean i wouldnt make a joke like "i hate men" to a dude's face bc it's unhelpful in the same way i wouldn't say i hate white people to a random white person's face, but like. yknow? i dont know specifically what example you're thinking of but i would pretty confidently say there IS a difference between how women talk abt men and how men talk abt women. i agree that it's unhelpful for them and YOURSELF to genuinely earnestly think men are genetically unable to be better bc it just. isn't true. but i would definitely say misogyny and "i hate men" are different. again though idk what example you're using here, but just like... when i walk around as a woman, and even when i walk around as a man, i see like every third guy talkin crazy shit on how Fundamentally Different women are from men and women are This horrible thing and women are That horrible thing and women Can't Help But Be Crazy and when i talk to women all i get are "well he's a man. he's stupid." and usually that doesn't read as bioessentialism, it reads as tiredness from dealing with misogyny all the time. so i agree to an extent, bioessentialism is an issue, and all the "feminine energy astrology balanced by male aggressiveness and men can't help but be stupid people because their brains are wired differently" are contributing to a worsening of some kind, but also i don't know that i'm seeing more manhate than i am misogyny, still to this day, and i am able to opporate socially as both a man and a woman so i see both sides pretty frequently. i feel like you have a specific example you're thinking of that i don't know, because all i can think of are the times i've personally seen men freak out and do shitty stuff because they know a woman who doesn't feel safe around men that they are close to, and both are really horrible about communication, which is a two part thing and a lot more complicated than just random negativity

I don't think I said manhate is more common than misogyny, and I'm sorry if I did because that's not really what I was going for. The point of that post was more to point out the hypocrisy of taking low blows at men while women doing the same thing gets crickets and tumbleweeds. Maybe you haven't experienced this, but I certainly have as a man. Just as there's things I can do that are easier for me to get away with as a dude, there are things chicks can get away with easier than I ever could.

I don't really think the way different genders talk about each other is that different, pre transition I heard women talk crazy shit about dudes, about how we can't control our sex drives and how we're useless if we don't make enough money, and tbh I don't really see how "he can't help being dumb and useless, he's a man" is any less of a meanspirited generalization than "she can't help being oversensitive and hysterical, she's a woman." It's both generalizing stereotypes that are, on some level, hurtful to the demographic they're being hurled at. There's plenty of men who have greivances with abusive and shitty women and we (RE: LEFTIST SPACES) don't let them speak poorly of women, so why is it ok in these same spaces to let women say whatever just cus of their trauma? It's like you say, respect is a two way street. I'm not listening to anyone who makes blind assumptions about me because of my gender and presentation.

I'm going to parrot my friend's reply as well: I don't think a lot of this is "just venting", I don't think making generalizations and saying cruel things about 50% of the population exists in a vaccuum. And even if it did, I still think I'm allowed to say "hey, it hurts my feelings when you say I'm dumb and useless", because at the end of the day you can't deny feelings.

I'm glad you don't say shitty things about men to their faces, but women have done those things to me so you can't speak for all of them. I've been called a moid and told I wouldn't get respect until I "stopped raping and killing women and children" even though I've never put my hands on a woman or child in any way that could be described as anything short of "platonic and consensual". I've been told that I'm not allowed to feel hurt and upset when women verbally abuse me because women are saints who can do no wrong, because they're lower on the social pecking order than me, because other men are nasty and cruel so I have to suck it up and take one for the team. I think people only think this stuff is "harmless venting" because they don't actually realize how biased their perceptions of men and masculinity are. I've had many trans men who can testify to my experiences word for word going as far back as the 70s in the very queer and feminist spaces that I've been bitching about for the past 3 years. So while I don't think institutional misandry is real, or anything, while I don't think women are at fault for being annoyed with how shitty we can be, I do definitely think prejudice is real and I think it's dished out rather unfairly and uncritically.

[borom1r]

No pressure to answer/do when has brain but 1, 3, 4, 7, 9, 10, 11, 14, 18 (idk what this is but I’m intrigued), 21, 22, 23, 24, 27, 28, 29, 31, 38, 40, 42 for the PC asks >:) and then these ones for Fýrulf and Hjaleth: How does (Dream guy) feel about your OC?How does your OC feel about (DG) Did your OC bear witness to anyone’s full character arc? What is the worst thing your OC does in their story?What is your OC’s ‘‘darkness moment’’ and redemption moment?

oooooooooo yayy m gonna do. all of these for both bc technically Hjaleth could get built out into an actual D&D PC too :3c

— Fýrulf —

1) Does your PC believe it’s possible to save someone?

hm. tentative yes? in that you can love and support someone + be there for them but ultimately they have to do the work to save themselves. and also there are certain things you just Cannot come back from

3) How would your PC describe themselves?

oooo.... extremely factually if you pushed him. light brown hair, orange eyes, scars, etc. generally speaking he thinks of himself in terms of his pack and doesn't really quantify himself as an individual. tends to give very generic answers (i.e. "what's your favorite food?" "meat.")

4) How do they perceive themselves?

again, bare bones and factual. brother, protector, moon-kissed warrior, child of Loki.

7) So if your PC had a car what kind of car would it be?

he wouldn't

9) If your PC rolled through a McDonald’s what would they order

40pc chicken nuggets

10) How does your PC fidget?

cracks his knuckles repeatedly

11) How does your PC show affection?

gets physically in the way of danger to protect ppl he considers his packmates, brings them gifts, hunts for food, will actually listen to them if they give him commands

14) How does your PC feel about white lies?

necessary facet of survival in the wider world but 1) he's bad at lying and 2) he Will Not lie to packmembers/clanmates.

18) Where would your PC fall on the futch scale?

butch

21) What tarot would your PC be?

suit: wands

court: knight

major arcana: the tower

22) What is your PC’s #1 personality strength?

loyal to a fault

23) What is your PC’s #1 personality flaw?

feels everything intensely + can be quick to jump to conclusions/does not think through anything logically

24) If your PC found a book that detailed their whole life, from birth to whatever death they’ll have, would they read it and why?

no bc he couldn't care less

27) When your PCs hit rock bottom, what do they do?

force a transformation and kill people about it (he's a lycanthropic barbarian, adapted so that as part of a rage he can trigger a transformation so long as it's 1) night out and 2) he has a knife to cut himself with) (his transformations are specifically inspired by Trick r Treat; i.e. he has to peel his own skin off. painless on a full moon but causes damage if forced)

28) When your PCs want comfort, what do they seek out?

if he's at home, his older half-brother Komash or his older half-sister Wulfflæd. if he's adventuring, he'll go find some wild wolves to hang out + hunt with.

29) Please describe your PC’s romantic type:

he would say "I'm not picky" but in reality his sense of romantic love is loosely defined at best + he would much rather be treated like someone's loyal attack dog than looked at with anything resembling lust. he's a wolf before he's a man and while he's not opposed to rolling around in the proverbial hay it is exclusively done either for his partner's enjoyment or bc he needs to bring home a new clan member (but he's not old enough to worry abt fathering pups yet so that's not really on his mind)

31) What’s your favorite part of playing your PC?

SADLYYYY ive only had the chance to play him as a BG3 character but he's a bit of a freak and i enjoy that about him :3 it's also been fun ironing out his morality more bc it really does all hinge on his packmates' perceptions. isolated from that it's a bit of a wash and he's gonna be a lot more inclined to fly off the handle without a packmate holding the proverbial leash (i.e. he likes Gale enough to behave with at least SOME decorum)

38) How did you choose your PC’s name?

it's an old Norse name that would roughly translate to "Wolf [of] Fir Trees"

40) What are your PC’s eating habits?

.........meat in various questionable states of rawness

42) Who is your PC’s favorite NPC(s) and why?

he's romancing Astarion and got REAL close to romancing Gale (platonic boy best friendssssss < he still wants to fuck the wizard but Gale said no polyamory 😔). currently in the process of romancing Halsin as well, + he has an unhealthy relationship w the Dream Visitor for sure

How does (Dream guy) feel about your OC?

Inscrutable Astral Being Who Seems To Be Fond of Fýrulf. at the very least he definitely wants sth from him. if it turns out DG was only using Fýrulf there Will Be Problems.

How does your OC feel about (DG)?

lovesick little puppy who wandered into the astral cube bullshit in the crèche PURELY to see if DG was alright.... Fýrulf is gonna fuck that guy so HELP him gods

Did your OC bear witness to anyone’s full character arc?

we're getting there :3 he'd see Astarion + Gale both thru hell or high water, as it stands currently

What is the worst thing your OC does in their story?

constant murder? potential fratricide? technically speaking, probable cannibalism? pick your poison.

What is your OC’s ‘‘darkness moment’’ and redemption moment?

hmmmm not sure that he's had one yet. if his little brother chooses to Turn + fails to embrace his lycanthropic bloodlust, Fýrulf will be expected to ritually hunt + murder him (if he's at home visiting the village, at least). which'll be rough, dgmw, but it's an expected part of life. unsure atm how he'll handle it but it won't necessarily sway any of his beliefs abt pack life etc. he really couldn't give less of a fuck abt bog standard mortal morality. leave him alone let him have wolf brain

— Hjaleth —

1) Does your PC believe it’s possible to save someone?

oh 110%, he's a Cleric of Týr, a god of justice. the ability to save people, the ability for people to come back from the worst places, to atone— it's foundational to Hjaleth

3) How would your PC describe themselves?

oh he's just a simple tiefling picking his way through life, doing what he can to do right by people. humble guy through and through

4) How do they perceive themselves?

he's Just Some Guy :]

7) So if your PC had a car what kind of car would it be?

is he too tall for a 1970 cobalt VW beetle? yes. will that stop him? no.

9) If your PC rolled through a McDonald’s what would they order?

sausage biscuit w/ hashbrowns

10) How does your PC fidget?

wears + fidgets w/ his rings

11) How does your PC show affection?

he's a touch guy! a hand on the arm, an affectionate nudge, a hug, so on and so forth— very much a fan of bodily draping himself over Gale + resting his chin on top of Gale's head so he can watch whatever he's doing

14) How does your PC feel about white lies?

like Fýrulf he's bad at lying but instead of it being bc he doesn't get the point of lying, it's bc Lying is Morally Wrong and Generally Unjust. doesn't consider surprises to be lies + finds communication to be important so Hjaleth's gonna talk things out WELL before he'd ever consider lying. ppl deserve to know the truth.

18) Where would your PC fall on the futch scale?

butchy femme

21) What tarot would your PC be?

suit: pentacles

court: queen

major arcana: the world

22) What is your PC’s #1 personality strength?

extremelyyyyyyyyy strong sense of justice

23) What is your PC’s #1 personality flaw?

a little too trusting

24) If your PC found a book that detailed their whole life, from birth to whatever death they’ll have, would they read it and why?

no bc ultimately he'd feel like it's not his place to know. that's up to the Gods, not him

27) When your PCs hit rock bottom, what do they do?

meditate, and ultimately seek justice. how did he get rock bottom. if it was external forces, what can be done to right those wrongs? if it was internal, how can he better himself? how does he start moving forward.

28) When your PCs want comfort, what do they seek out?

nature, rivers especially. he generally prefers to be alone to contemplate things before he seeks comfort with People. he finds comfort in quiet communion with his god.

29) Please describe your PC’s romantic type:

............Gale.

31) What’s your favorite part of playing your PC?

it's very fun to play someone with a strong sense of morality and justice compared to Fýrulf, whose morality really boils down to "bite things first ask questions later."

38) How did you choose your PC’s name?

.......slapped a J in Haleth

40) What are your PC’s eating habits?

he tries to have a balanced diet even while adventuring! he likes to forage and hunt and he's a decent enough cook

42) Who is your PC’s favorite NPC(s) and why?

Gale!! Gale!! Gale!! Gale!! < he's holding that wizard up by the scruff of his neck /silly (he's also fond of Shadowheart, Wyll, and Karlach)

How does (Dream guy) feel about your OC?

they have less of a bond than Fýrulf does with his DG, but Hjaleth's sense of justice means he wants to do right by DG. they're friendly! Hjaleth's also less manipulable

How does your OC feel about (DG)?

again, they're friendly. as it stands currently, Hjaleth feels driven to help DG but he's not foaming at the mouth staring at DG's tits the way Fýrulf is.

Did your OC bear witness to anyone’s full character arc?

Not Yet either but. we're seeing this Gale romance thru to the end babyyyyyy

What is the worst thing your OC does in their story?

HRM. I think ultimately Hjaleth will have to betray someone. whenever his lowest point comes, it should ultimately mirror Týr sacrificing his hand so Fenrir can be chained. betraying someone in the name of the greater good, no matter how you feel about the personal injustice, and losing a part of yourself in the process.

What is your OC’s ‘‘darkness moment’’ and redemption moment?

see above. redemption... a lot of atonement. ensuring what was done was for the greater good. doing whatever's in his power to make the world a brighter place, to make up for the personal betrayal. it's sth he'd carry with him for a long time (beyond just the obvious physical scars)

[halimpark7]

I'm not ok w frazzle. It makes people Immune to suffering. It makes you into a zombie. People are suffering from beatings. It causes people in your soul tribe to be abused. You're spiritually stealing their hormones.

(my dad had a class in college where people could volunteer to be spanked before class, idk why. Anyway my dad always volunteered. My dad was really sparkly. You want to shine, have someone jazz hands the shit out of you) better than frazzle and you don't have to pay for it spiritually. Find a mean bitch who loves you and spank her.

You're going to have to pay for everything you've ever done to the degree you've caused harm. Find everything in a mutually beneficial way.

Method Acting steals from real life people who were more abused than you. It's channeling. You're stealing their life energy, their nervousness, their life or death anxiety, or their life story. You're just acting.

Causing them to be meth/crack addicts. Reliving their trauma.

They're supposed to, as well live the high life, but you're all so fucking greedy that you always have to take take take. You steal from all your soulmates.

You being mean to a nice person is your demons being jealous of their God energy. It's stealing their light, eating their motivation from God. It's trying to kill that piece of them so you can wear it for yourself. Crazy narcissists do this all the time. (Every bully ever) Will rip your proverbial hair and tape it to their personality. They're crazy.

You're secretly dumb. Secretly jealous, secretly something devious. Everyone is.*shrugs*

Everyone is selling something, don't be judgemental of whores. We all sell something we never wanted to. First integrity. And when we were young "control" to our dumb parents.

We are guardians of souls around us. Not dictators, tyrants, slave owners. People are themselves. Let them be who they are. Controlling them is narcissistic. Narcissism is a possession.

It feels good to lay back and have someone else suffer and work. It feels way better to be the farm owner than the cotton picker. Way better to be the executioner than the criminal.

We were all here before. Those desires run through all of us. Do "you" in the most healing way possible.

Want to kill people? Find a kinky freak and have murder her vagina sex. (Thanks Mike, for this idea)

Someone who loves you and who you love that you want to be human towards.

Or be a prison executioner. Everything you spiritually are inclined to is a part of you or your past life to transform and evolve.

Want to feel powerful as a woman, rape your husband. (Consensually)

There's always a way to get your needs met that helps you calm the fuck down.

I'm not going to hell and I don't want you to either. Your kids need to learn consequences and compassion for the suffering of others. You're part responsible.

Evil people don't feel ok unless they feel the suffering of good people. They need to squeeze God out of things just like the fallen angels torture humanity to feel the energy of what it's like to be close to God.

If you have an evil kid, hurt for them, make them feel guilty with your pain, so they don't kill the lives of others. If you're evil, get your wife to beat you up. Beating smaller things is demonic. Having them torture you makes you compassionate to suffering and empowers them. And it hurts.

Let me know how this goes. Let's all make a better world together.

Don't hate prostitutes. Everything exists in society bc people want it to be here. We all have needs. We are all monsters somewhere.

I truly believe no one is all that good of a person, unless your a "saint".

We just have social shame that prevents us from going too far.

Look at the Holocaust. So many "good" people thinking they were doing the right thing. People love being bullies. It makes us feel powerful.

Imagine someone you didn't really like, needing a place to crash forever, really want to help them? They don't want to sleep w you anymore?? Out you go. Bye.

Whoops. Human nature is good but also really bad. Work on where you suck. Night.

[eldritch-spouse]

Thank you for answering my ask about lust monsters so detailed! I hope it didn't come off as judgemental to others who enjoy lust monsters (I just wanted to say how I enjoyed your work which is new for me).

I really like monster-loving for exploring "forbidden" topics. People who are interested in things outside what is considered "acceptable" are often mobster-ised so it makes sense that we enjoy monster loving. (Especially since monster loving has often historically been about autonomy and/or the ostracised loving and being loved)

I find your universe really interesting, especially the idea that certain more powerful monsters (I forgot what you called them, I think it started with V?) Like Krulu and Hummuna Mama exist.

It's an interesting take on our pursuit for an "all powerful" boss at the top of the proverbial pyramid. Th fact that there are those considered gods that are of the same species but not necessarily the same "pantheon". They all have different interests and goals but it isn't portrayed as a "war of evil vs good" - it's less black and white in a way that humanists them while being consistent to the fact that they're disturbingly inhuman. It creates an interesting dynamic.

There being different types of powerful monsters & monster power structures as well (the icons of the rings of hell > demons of the rings > imps, the scientifically created monsters, the clergy structure) makes a mismatch of cultures in a way that makes the world more bustling and rich. It's kind of a paganistic/pan approach that I really love!!

Real life doesn't follow a simple a > b > c pipeline and is more messy so the wonder/wildness in your stories that allow escapism and exploration of weird ideas/topics isn't overshadowed by a sense of being lost in the senseless madness that's trying too hard to be mad. (Idk if that makes sense)

Stories often use "rules" and "laws" within the world (sort of a "okay, this ridiculous thing can happen because of this explanation behind it, but because of that this other can never happen because that would be ridiculous"). And I love how different writers approach it but sometimes it can be restricting and easy to forget there are always exceptions to the rules. It can be daunting.

Are there any aspects of your world that you feel exceptionally proud of? Or any that you put a different line of thought behind? I always like hearing about the thought process of authors who write monsters & fantasy

[Once more, most of it under the read more.]

I don't really dwell on the "why"s of monsterfucking. There's always some level of psychology behind it -And I know this sounds ridiculous, but you could make a pretty interesting sociological study about certain aspects of this philia- Everyone has their own reasons as to why they developed this, and I don't really take "pride" in it in the sense that I feel special for being a monsterfucker or that I revel in my own perceived "otherness".

This kink is for those who fit in and those who do not, which makes it a little weird when I see one or two rare instances of people making a weird sort of gaslight gatekeep girlboss situation out of it. Again, it's not too often I find this.

The monster species you're talking about are "siadar" (the longer designation being "astsar siadar"). It's hard for me to create all-powerful figures. For an all powerful character to succeed, they need to be used very carefully and scarcely, because the more of them you expose, the more you risk showing flaws in their design and supposed omnipotence. That's why I made it a point to not do that. Siadar are considered gods, but in reality they're just another species, with their own defined natures.

I leave a lot of loose and undefined ends in this narrative on purpose, and this is so that I can always pick and pluck at new sides and aspects of what I've already built, effectively never running out of potential content to explore. I can one day start chipping at siadar culture harder. I can go into the period of time where Hell was governed by the betrayer (which I intend to do something with, something that is already beginning but you can't tell yet). I can poke at all kinds of things.

I don't think the rules I've made thus far are restricting, but let's be honest, I'm leaving a lot of things vague on purpose specifically to allow myself a looser leash when creating pieces.

I wouldn't really say there's something I'm particularly proud of, so to say?

I liked incorporating the idea of Heaven and Hell not as "black and white" systems of "good and evil". Heaven is not a place where you go to when you die and have been good, nor is Hell a place you get dragged into post-death because you were a piece of shit in life. They're their own areas with a lot of history behind them, the general perception of which having been distorted somewhat with time, both by outsiders and insiders.

I like the way I've built religions in this universe, even if it would take me a long while to explain how each annex to "the surface" is perceived and why that's the case.

In fact, I like the origin behind monsters I concocted too, even if it's not exactly the most original.

Dorem's relationship with undead is also something I enjoyed thinking out, because most people assume a figure like him would revel in the chaos undead entities make, when Dorem is only a soulkeeper being constantly worn down by the shackles of his own work, constantly faced with what he perceives as his mistakes- Who, as the final nail in the coffin of his dignity, worship him as if he intentionally created them.

I like a lot of things about my narrative, but I'm not going to sit here and write paragraphs of what essentially amounts to petting my own ass.

The input was nice though! :v

[professorspork]

8 17 24

[8 answered previously; I have no new thoughts]

17. Past or present tense? Why?

Present, 100%. The easy 'why' is that I have an MFA in screenwriting and screenplays are always in present tense, so once I got in the habit there was no going back. It's just how I'm trained.

Beyond that, though, I do have a stylistic preference. I just... like the immediacy of it, the way it makes the story feel like it's living and breathing. Like. The difference between

Oh, she realized. She loved her.

and

Oh, she realizes. She loves her.

may be sort of a hyperbolic example because the strength of emotion I'm leaning on here, but it just... grabs me more, idk.

24. Thoughts on flashbacks/flashforwards.

Positive!

Like any tool, I suppose they can be overused in some instances, but I can't imagine why anyone would want to take them out of the proverbial toolbox. Not only can they be really useful on a macro level in terms of structure, but they can also be delightful as, like, a fun little parenthetical aside-- like a quick flash punchline cutaway a la Arrested Development.

But like... on a showing vs telling level, sometimes you just need to write a character actually living through something in the moment instead of just remembering it or describing it.