#idk the last time i felt this happy watching a couple until the end

[mostlyfate]

[tears0fsatan]

☆ 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐒 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐒

✦ ⊹ ˚˖ warnings... mentions m!reader a few times but can be read as gn for the most part lol, implied romantic/queerplatonic relationship but interpret it as you like, its pretty soft man idk what to say

 :¨·.·¨ ♥︎  a.n... need more dateables content on my blog sigh>.<)) i began this all the way last year in april.... (∩﹏∩) i am slowly clearing out my drafts and reqs okay!!!! (i hope the halloween special final will be out before this years halloween...)

DIAVOLO !

now, we all know he's a bit ... behind on things outside of ruling an entire realm so he most definitely had to ask barbatos and lucifer for suggestions.

he was taking you all these fancy, bougie places with a clear itinerary in mind (thanks to the influence of a certain avatar of pride) that at the end of the day felt more like a tour of devildom than a date.

on the last of his planned out date, it ended up raining and the two of you somehow spent the last couple of hours talking to each other underneath the shade of a tree where you found out that all the dates were thanks to diavolo's right hand men.

after that talk you finally convinced him to take you places that were dear to him and to allow you to plan future dates as well.

he insists on paying, regardless of how much you protest and tell him that you also have pride as a man (it's just something you have to deal with sorry).

take him on a date in the human realm and watch as this scary ruler of all demons turns into a big baby, fascinated with everything (now its your turn to play tour guide).

if you get him one of those cheap, silly little keychains you find in gift stores, he'd treasure it for as long as he lives.

if you get anything matching (be it a shirt, keychains, plushies, you name it), he'll have the biggest sparkling eyes you've ever seen on a living being and beg you to wear it for the rest of your time in the human realm.

his favourite dates are the ones where you and him simply enjoy a cup of tea and snacks barbatos prepared in the castles garden glass gazebo (its domestic and he likes seeing you in his 'domain' so to say).

BARBATOS !

picnics. with your favourite snacks he's prepared from as early as the night before.

appreciates every moment alone with you especially since it's rare for the two of you to be together without the others around.

he always goes for something he knows you'll like, and if you don't enjoy a particular part of the date he'll keep it in mind.

the most important part of the date to him is seeing you happy and being in your company.

thought there would never come a time where he would be peeved by diavolo calling for him until one day the demon lord forgot about his date with you and wondered where he went.

after that diavolo encouraged barbatos to go out with you more often (would not take no for an answer no matter how much barbatos tried to turn him down).

he'd be a bit hesitant to go to the human realm since he'd be so far away from diavolo but the thought of being alone with you is just so tempting (he's a demon after all) he can't decline.

if you bought him a little plush keychain TRUST it would be posed carefully in the kitchen where he can see it every day while he prepares the de facto demon kings meals.

he would take you to the most unknown and hidden spots in devildom that even diavolo wouldn't know of their existence and turn it into a frequent rendezvous spot (and perhaps it excites a small part of you, perhaps because it's more or less a secret that only you and barbatos share).

SIMEON !

simple minded. likes going anywhere with you.

gotta say though, he especially likes the way your eyes crinkle when you smile after tasting a homemade sweet treat.

doesn't have an ideal date with you but dates where you two bake together are his favourite.

also note. he will tear up if you turn the tables on him and prepare him some treats of your own specialty (his only smiles wider when he hears you grumble about being as much of a househusband as he is).

even if you make something that could rival solomon's cooking, he'd still eat it with a smile (because you made it all for him and he would be a fool to pass it up).

if you guys go out for a stroll in any of the three realms, he'd always have his hand on you (fingers intertwined with yours, arm coiled around your waist and such).

he'll find some small treasure from the date and keep it tucked away somewhere.

loves taking pictures with a polaroid so he can treasure the memories (he especially loves taking candid pictures of you, especially while eating one of his sweets of course).

be prepared to gain weight if he takes you up to the celestial realm, he will make sure you eat every single angelic dish until you couldn't do so much as waddle around.

likes taking you around the celestial realm and telling you all the stories of his past and some passed down stories from other older angels.

while passing through the many gardens of the celestial realm, he'll sneakily pluck a flower or two for you until you end up with nothing less than a small bouquet (and more often than not getting a rather lengthy scolding from michael).

SOLOMON !

you know that UR card of him where he takes you on a magic carpet ride??? yeah expect that sort of shit constantly.

he is so fond of you and your reactions and that just makes him wanna toy around with you all the more.

he's not ashamed to cause a ruckus in all three realms as long as he can see you either laugh until tears gather in the corner of your eyes or cling onto him while half heartedly yelling at him, he's willing to pull out all his little tricks up his sleeve.

he is such a menace but you can tell he puts a lot of thought and care into his surprises, you can't find it in yourself to be upset with him (and truth be told you do enjoy the rise he brings out of you).

during a rare moment of vulnerability, he'd take you around his hometown and reminisce his youth, telling tales of ancient memories that only he would remember (noting the way his eyes shone with an emotion you couldn't quite pinpoint).

never one to dwell in his nostalgia for long, he would take you to another spot and spin some hauntingly believable ghost story just to scare you (whether you believe it or not, solomon will most definitely try to sneak in a few spooks here and there especially with magic).

after he would torment you and every other living being in his vicinity, he'd like to end the day by doing something comparatively calmer and laid back, perhaps something as simple as cuddles, reading together (or maybe even him reading to you), or watching a movie.

© 2024 TEARS0FSATAN. please don’t translate, modify, repost or plagiarise my works anywhere.

[pixiesfz]

kyra cooney-cross x reader

plot: you and Kyra used to be best friends and now she's on top of the world and you feel like you're falling behind.

warning: angst, swearing, idk

You sat at the restaurant with a menu in front of you as another waiter came to ask for your order "I'm just waiting for someone" You smiled politely but they just nodded their head and walked away.

You checked your phone again it was 8:30, you had both agreed on 8:00, all those years ago, every Friday. She was hardly ever late. Well that was until after the world cup.

She had thrived and you watched on the sidelines almost every match, she gained attention and you loved that for her, you were even the first person to go to her apartment to congratulate her on her signing with Arsenal.

But now she was busy and even more popular with the fans, you wanted to be so happy for her but it pulled her away from you so you never fought it, you only texted her a couple of times with congratulations and the conversations never lasted long. But you always had your Friday night 'dates' your other friends called them.

It was no secret that the two of you had some feelings towards another and your flat mates bullied you for it non stop. You realized you liked the girl when she got the call up to be in the senior squad for Matildas. She was so happy and her dream had finally come true.

You had a feeling she liked you too but you never acted on it, you were always scared whenever the opportunity came up.

You regrated never telling her because maybe then she would be sitting in front of you right now looking at the menu over and over even when you knew she would just settle with a classic margarita pizza and a sprite lemonade. She wasn't to fancy.

It had been 45 minutes now and you had lost your hope, she wasn't coming and she didn't even send you a text. You felt embarrassed as you sat up and paid for your drink as you had told the workers you were waiting for someone and now you were walking out alone.

It was when you turned the corner of the street you saw the girl you had been waiting for in a frantic state almost running to the restaurant.

"Y/N!" she called out as you walked past her "you were late" you told her, not changing your pace. You felt her go to your side again "Y/N I'm so sorry-"

You breathed in before turning to her "you didn't even bother to text!" Kyra looked down to the floor giving you an opportunity to talk again "where even were you?" you questioned and she was silent again "I forgot" she mumbled and you took a step back.

How could she forget.

For three years you've been doing this. What could have been so adamant on her mind that she forgot that she was supposed to see you.

"Or did you forget about me?"

Your question struck something in Kyra "No I could never-" "No I'm serious" you told her "I'm happy for you I really am but I feel like I'm just something that you're leaving behind, we don't talk as much, we haven't facetimes each other in god knows how long" you ranted

"I'm sorry" Kyra said looking at you but you shook your head "I know 'm not your girlfriend or anything, but I don't want to be another ex friend" you started "we've been through too much for that" you told her before walking away and to your car and driving off.

When you woke up the next morning you didn't know how to feel, did you just fuck up everything? You looked to your phone to maybe see a message from Kyra but instead you saw one from Steph, Kyra's team mate from Arsenal and the Tillies.

Steph: Hey do you know what's wrong with Kyra she seems weird today

Fuck. You ruffled your hair between your fingers and ignored the feeling in your stomach

Y/N: Yep I have a feeling, I'll come over after training.

You didn't want Kyra to feel like this even though it was what she made you feel for weeks on end, but you couldn't give up on her, you couldn't give up on the both of you.

It was late when you finally had the courage to drive to Steph's house where Kyra had been staying before she found an apartment near training. It was dark and the stars were in the sky.

When you knocked on the door Steph was quick to greet you "hey Y/N" she smiled and let you in "hey Steph" you sheepishly smiled as you walked in "Kyra's in the guest bedroom, been stuck in their since training" she sighed and turned to you "you're the only person that I've seen her be so happy with" she pointed out "sorry if I interrupted-" "your fine Steph" you waved her off before breathing in "I'll go talk to her" you nodded before making your way into the guest bedroom.

You hesitated before knocking on the door but did anyway "I'll have dinner later Steph" she called back "It's not Steph" you replied back and Kyra was quick to open the door after hearing your voice "hey Y/N/N" she whispered "Hey Ky" you smiled before letting yourself in and closing the door behind you.

"Steph texted me, said you weren't yourself" you admitted and Kyra nodded "I can't believe I forgot" she told you and you nodded "to be fair I distanced myself a little bit, I didn't want to invite myself to everything whilst you adventured with Arsenal" you shrugged and she looked up at you "I noticed the distance" she told you "I thought you started seeing someone or something"

You laughed "me" you pointed at yourself "never" you shook your head and the girl laughed a little as you sat next to her on the bed. You both of you stayed on the bed in silence before Kyra spoke up

"I didn't just forget yesterday I went out" she admitted and you nodded, it didn't really change anything "with the team?" you asked and she nodded "It started with the team then I got stuck in a conversation with a fan"

"was she cute?" you teased and she laughed "Nah you're cuter" she teased back and you both blushed "what did you talk about?" you asked "Football, my career, treating me better than I had at other clubs, treating me like I was somebody"

"Your getting a fan base Kyra, you play for the Arsenal" you poked her shoulder as she leaned back and came back and leaned her head on your shoulder.

"I wonder if she would've talked to me if I wasn't somebody?" she wondered "I would've" you smiled and Kyra looked up at you.

You just kept your smile as she looked at you "I've always been your biggest supporter" you reminded her "I know" she smiled "and I plan to stay" you shot your eyebrows at her and she nodded "I'd like that...a lot" she laughed and looked back down to her legs.

"Can you stay tonight?" she asked sheepishly and you nodded "of course" you stated and gave her a kiss on the forehead that lingered "always" you said as you walked over to the door "Imma ask Steph though"

"Y/N your making this seem like a sleepover in high school" Kyra laughed and you shrugged "oh well the most eventful stuff happens at high school sleepovers" you said and walked out to Steph, leaving a blushing Kyra behind.

When you came back Kya was pulling out pajama's for you which consisted of her Matilda's jersey and old pajama shorts which you laughed at. "You just wanna see your name on my back" you smiled as Kyra shrugged and just jumped on the bed, you following once you got changed.

Once you got comfortable Kyra turned to you "When I asked you if you were seeing anyone you said never" she stated "what did that mean?" she asked and you looked at her "I'm not sure I guess..." you trailed off "I just had a crush on someone and just never got over it" you said quietly before moving closer to Kyra who subconsciously did the same "what about you?" you asked even more quiet as Kyra's eyes were set on your lips "same thing" she said before leaning down and giving a slight peck on your lips but not leaving as your foreheads stayed together, nothing was said before you leaned i again and kissed her back, it was nice as your lips just felt like they were made for you, when you pulled back you both smiled.

"Yeah I'm not going anywhere" you laughed.

[juliansjss]

“ WHEN YOU GET BACK ON A SATURDAY NIGHT . . . AND YOUR HEAD IS CAVING IN “ | Faust ! |

Warnings : fem!reader, public sex, p in v, softdom!faust, blowjobs, honestly pretty vanilla if I’m being completely honest. (I do not support the actual person, or the band mayhem, just Valter playing a part.)

admin note : it’s Julian and all I’m saying is I have a new found love and appreciation for Valter, and idk where it came from

___________________

The day had started fairly normal. You and the taller man had got there around six PM, the place was bumping with people. The fair has always been one of your favorite places since you were a child.

Everything from the greasy food, and the spinny rides, you loved it all. It screamed of nostalgia and childhood. You loved it, and you made it abundantly clear. Yet, it was still pretty shocking when Faust came with the idea to go together, as somewhat of a date. It came as a major shock, since that kind of thing didn’t scream him. But it screamed you, and he knew that. It was something you had brung up multiple times since the two had been together.

So that’s how you ended up, a large lemonade cup in one hand and the man’s hand in your other. He however, stuck out like a sore thumb. The man’s dark and moody aesthetic clashing against the bright yellow and pink that was spread across the park.

He rubbed your hand, even if it wasn’t his scene, it made you happy and that’s all that really mattered.

The first ride you got on, was a simple one. The music express, a classic, as Faust said. You agreed. The two of you get in, him on the outside of the ride. As the ride begins, you cuddle on his side as the ride moves you that way anyways. It was a sweet couple of moments, having fun without worry about anything else.

The night went like that on multiple rides, until you found some seats to watch as the sunset and fireworks began to go off. The two of you cuddled into each other, a soft kiss tucked into your head by the man. A happy smile on both of your faces as the night began to calm down.

Most of the children that had been there before, were gone by now. Mostly replaced by older teenagers and adults. It made everything slow down. The two of you felt more comfortable being outright romantic. From kissing to his arm wrapped around you, in a protective embrace. The smile plastered on your face was enough to last for days.

The two of you walked around a little more, playing games as most of the rides were closing down as it hit close to 10:30pm. It was time to go, you knew that.

“Can we get some late dinner?” You said, moving your head to look up at the man, with a curious expression.

“Of course,” he mumbled quietly, “what are you thinking?” He said, looking back down at you.

“There’s a diner about 5 minutes away? Heard they got good burgers” you said, with a soft laugh.

“Sounds great.” He said, returning the soft smile on his face.

The two of you walked to his small car, putting your stuff in the back seat. And drove down to the small diner, there were about 3 other groups of people, which wasn’t all that bad.

The both of you got a small booth, close to the window. The waiter came up to you both, taking your drink order.

A water for him, and a sprite for you. Pretty normal for the both of you. Then once that was brought to the table, the both of you ordered.

The dinner went pretty smooth, the two of you paid and sat up.

“Can you come with me, real quick?” He mumbled against your head softly.

You nodded quickly, a little confused as he dragged you into the family bathroom quickly. That’s when you noticed the strain against the man’s jeans. Oh. That’s what it was.

“That’s so sweet.” You mumbled, staring up at him, “can’t wait to take me until we get home?”

The man shook his head, as he kissed you deep. Lots of tongue. God it was so hot, you couldn’t even lie. The risk factor, his tongue pushing against yours as you flushed against the wall.

His hand, pushed under your thigh and your leg wrapped around his hip, the position reeling with passion and lust. And that’s all that was there.

“Fuck, you’re so hot. You wanna suck me off?” He whispered, he wasn’t the greatest at dirty talk, but that was okay. It didn’t matter when the want pushed through him like none before.

“You know I do.” You said, getting down on knees, shimmying the cardigan off your shoulders, to land at your back and the wall, before taking the straps of the lacey black tank top off your shoulder, pushing them down to let your chest show, moving to unclip the deep burgundy bra off.

A deep primal groan came from deep in his throat as he saw the scene in front of him, grabbing your chin, leaning down to kiss you roughly once again. “Don’t be too loud, got it? Can’t get caught.” He whispered, and you knew it was more for what was bound to happen.

A soft nod came from you, as he began running your hand up and down his cock, a smile plastered on your face as you watched the man above you. His long hair falling in front of his eyes, watching you like a hawk.

You stroked him for a while longer, before leaning down to lick him, softly at first before you began grabbing his thighs to keep yourself grounded as you thrusting him into your mouth, his soft groans and grunts, like your own special music to your ears. You continued thrusting him into your mouth with a big smile, taking it with no fear as he tangled his large hands in your hair.

“Mm, fuck. I’m gonna cum.” He whispered out, his hands tangling in your hair tighter, making you squeak out a moan, you nodded as permission for him to do just that.

And that’s what he did, cumming down your throat with a deep groan, he grabbed your chin roughly and you opened your mouth, showing none of the cum left over. “That’s a good girl.” You smiled as he helped you up.

Maybe it was a bit gross to be on your knees and giving a blowjob in a random diner at 1am, but it wasn’t really the worse place the two of you had fucked, and you knew what you were getting into when the two of you had gotten into a relationship, it was okay.

“Wanna fuck you, baby.” He whispered against your ear, as you began stroking him once again.

“Want you to fuck me.” You said, humming as you continued until you felt him get hard under your touch, didn’t take too long.

“See what you do to me? Get me so worked up, so quick.” He mumbled against your neck, as he began littering it with hickeys bubbling up against the skin. He grabbed his wallet, grabbing a condom from it. The picture of you two, smiling brightly as you kissed, from behind the packaging.

He slid it on as quickly as possible, tossing the wrapping in the trashcan not too far from the two of you. As he pushed himself into you, you let out a soft yelp. It never got old, the slight stretch against him.

“That feels good, stay still for me, pretty girl.” He whispered in your ear, and you listened, how could you not with the sweetly sick tone?

So , you just nodded as he began to thrust slightly into you, not too quick, but not fast enough at the same time. You looked at him and he looked back at you with a knowing look, thrusting into you a bit faster as he brought his hand up to cover your mouth, as he began leaving more hickeys, down your body, stopping at your chest as he took your nipple in his mouth.

The moan you let out could have very well been from a porn, the mumble against his hand. He snapped, still not detaching his mouth from you, but bringing the hand to rub your clip even faster than his thrusts. The some whimpers and groans coming from the bathroom, was quite definitely the reason you heard the kitchen staff becoming increasingly louder as they cleaned up for the night. You would feel bad about it, but for now you were far too concerned with the pleasure between your thighs to give a fuck about what was happening behind that door.

“Fuck, please.. I’m gonna.. cum.” You said breathlessly, mumbled and whiny, as you watched the man in front of you.

“Me too, sweetheart. Cmon, that’s okay.” He mumbled, finally taking his mouth from your boob, taking his hand from your mouth to kiss you deeply.

You moaned into his mouth, as you finished against him. Your heart beating out of your chest as he groaned against you, finishing in the condom.

You both caught your breath as he took himself out of you, and as he threw the condom away.

“I love you.” He whispered, as the two began to clean up.

“I love you too, thank you for the sweet date.” You said, standing on your tippy toes to kiss his cheek.

[yuniniverse]

Hey I wanted to say i lovee your writing and can i request a junmin imagine where the reader and junmin meet through like a dance class it starts as junmin see u cry or the opposite idk u choose and they become close after that and all sorry for saying a lot btw i realllyyyyy love all of the work u did its sooo good

PAIRING !  ━ park junmin x gn reader

GENRE !  ━ angst (happy ending!), fluffy at the end(maybe too fluffy?), just two dancers that are head over heels over e/o

WORD COUNT !  ━ 1.7401k

AUTHOR NOTE ! ━ this was way too long than it should've TvT also ty for requesting love ! And tysm please your compliment made my day :"3 hope you like it ^^

SONG RECCS ! ━ twenty five twenty one by Jaurim / Very Slowly by Bibi !

The sound of rain clouded your mind, your mood similar to the gloomy dull sky above you. You were known as the star student in your dance institute, ofcourse you were happy, but it became a burden at certain times. And you blame yourself. You always look up to your brother Ham Jinsik who was the institute's ace, wanting to be like him. When you joined you knew you had to be better than anyone else as Jinsiks sister. However with the amount of work piling up on you along with practices made you loose your spark. Unfortunate to you, everyone noticed that change in you, including your not so secret crush Park Junmin. Today was the day you were looking forward for the most, the auditions that would get you a role in one of the upcoming play in The National Theatre of Korea. Something you always dreamt to dance in ever since you were a kid. Only for it all to go downhill. You were known as a ballet prodigy, but that title soon dipped after your teacher said she was disappointed in your rehearsal. You wouldn't get the part you looked forward to for 14 years of your life.

You slowly walked through the bustling streets, rain pouring down on you harshly. You were drenched, your clothes hugging you tightly as water dropped down. Everything felt so surreal. You found yourself sobbing as you dragged yourself, each step as heavy as how your heart felt. Some would say you were being dramatic, but this was your first love. Not to mention how your 10 years of friendshio with your so called friend group ended on the same day too. With them taunting at you untill you stepped out of the building. Turns out they just used you to get closer to your brother and we're the ones that created rumours and hoped for your downfall.

You stopped to wipe your tears, finally looking up. Your vision was blurry but you saw how everyone seemed to be happy. Everyone except you. Students sharing umbrellas, couples joking around and holding hands as they ran to seek shelter.

Your soft sobs turned into louder gasps as you tried to maintain your composture, flashbacks of your teachers looking at you with a crown on their face and your friends asking if you hurt yourself to have done your rehearsals that bad came flooding to your mind. Your head lowered again, you were shaking. Not because of the cold breeze that swept by you. You ran away from that place. The last thing you'd want is for someone to recognise you and tell the whole academy on how you weeped in the middle of the street because your a looser.

Unaware to you, someone was indeed watching you.

Your pace slowed down as you reached a park. Your park. The place you'd come to often. It was your brother who bought you here as a kid, a comfort place you two shared. Usually your brother would be sitting beside your swing, hugging you and telling how everything would be alright. He wasn't. He was away for a short trip with his friends. You were alone and it made you feel miserable.

Too many things clouded your mind and it made you feel more vulnerable and confused. Finally letting your feelings out, your knees dropped to the sandy ground, your head rested onto the seat of the swing you always played in as you cried helplessly. You felt stupid, you danced your entire life, what happened to you? Was it finally the time for you to let go of dance and focus on studies instead? You weren't ready for it, just the thought of leaving the one thing you lived for made your stomach churn in the wrong way.

Your ears perk up at the sound of hurried footsteps, as you lift your head you see junmin running, his head peeking side to side as his eyes searched for you. You wanted to call out to him, but your lisp refused to move. You felt your throat dry up as junmin finally looks at your devastated state.

You've known junmin for a whole year, you two were inseparable. Everytime junmin visited your house jinsik would sulk cuz he went straight to your room instead of looking at his clingy bestfriend.

He carefully stepped forward, reaching his hand out to you for you to hold. You hesitantly grab onto his hand and stand up and before you could even speak he pulled you into a hug. The sound of rain slowly faded as your mind only thought about junmin. His grip around your waist tightened, he brought his one hand upto your hair, caressing gently as he muttered 'its gonna be ok' into your ears. you were instantly reminded of your brother, giving you another reason to bawl your eyes out infront of the guy you so dearly loved. This is not how you wanted him to see you. Embarrassment slapping you in the face hard as you helplessly cried onto his shoulder, rambling about how shitty your day was in spite of preparing well and even going to bed early which you never did.

Junmin chuckles before breaking the hug, he cups your cheeks, his thumbs wiping the tears away. He leans to kiss your eyelids. "Y/n you did amazing, you just misunderstood! Your teacher did take you in, she just said she was disappointed in you and not that she wouldn't take you in? Your literally the best performer this academy has ever had!!" He says, you purse your lips together, still in doubt. You smile at him regardless as you let him walk you home.

You were greeted by your brother at the doorstep, you run to hug him as junmin started at you with a find smile. Oh the things he'd do for you to hug him the same way.  jinsik ofcourse scolded his hyung and you on how you two let yourselves get so drenched under the rain as you two snickered at how cute jinsik looked . Your smile immediately turned into a frowned and worried expression as your hands searched your neck for your necklace. It was your parents gift to you when you started your first ever dance class. You turned to look at junmin who was as worried as you. The moment he laid his eyes on your hands that were fidgeting around your neck and pockets he realised it was about the necklace you always loved and showers around to your friends. Jinsik caught the hint too. "It's ok y/n I'm sure you must have left it at the studio, we'll search tomorrow I promise" he says as an attempt to calm you down and send junmin to his dorms before the poor boy catches a cold.

The next morning you wake up to your brother screaming and running to your room as he held your necklace in the air. You squeal along with him as you two jumped on the bed like two happy hamsters. That was until it hit you. How did he find it if he didn't even go to the studio?

"How did you get it?" You questioned to which he smiled and said "Junmin hyung got it for you! He searched the whole night in the rain at the park and found it near one of the bushes of the swing. He said he got a cold though so he wouldn't come to academy- also promise me you wouldn't tell this to him?" You tilt your head to the side in confusion, "tell him what?" You ask.

"Junmin was the one to convince your teacher to let you into the play. Poor boy practically begged to take you in." He said, making you fall for the man even more. Before even saying a word you only out the door, running to his dorms.

You knocked on his door twice, waiting impatiently for junmin and once he opened his door you immediately ran to hug him. The impact causing him to stumble back to a wall. He looked at you worried, "you ok?" He asks with a croaky voice. you look up to face him, you two stared at each other in silence. junmins eyes glanced at your lips, unconsciously inching his face towards yours. Before he could even make a move, you pecked the corner of his lips. not wasting a single minute junmin pulls you and his lips were on yours. he kissed you so sweetly and gently, caressing your cheeks as he shyly smiled between your lips. your hands shifted from his shoulders to his neck, pulling him closer. Junmin swayed you around the dim lit hall, how you wished to never part away. he breaks the kiss, leaving a small peck your cheek, you smile at how red the boy was, his ears were practically on fire. The poor boy couldn't form words so instead he just gazed at your equally shy figure.

The cute moment lasted only for a few minutes as yechan called out to his hyung from their shared room, junmin groaned in response as you giggled. "Looks like you have to leave" you smiled to which junmin nodded, he felt cold as you slipped away from his arms and walked to the door, "thank you by the way, for the necklace. You didn't have to go through so much trouble" you say as you turned back to see junmin rubbing the back of his neck. "I only want to see you smile y/n, the way I smile and millions of butterflies swarm throughout my body and my whole world is filled with flowers just by looking at you, I wish to see you just as happy and contented with me as I do with you" he says, you were fighting the urge to just kiss him again but you didn't want to an annoyed yechan to see his older brother and his best friend being all lovely dovey in the morning, moreover he would bring it up for the rest of your life and tease you on it so you passed on the opportunity. Junmin however held your hand before you could turn to walk away and kissed you one last time before you could leave.

"I love you so much y/n, i always have and I always will."

[theoceanoasis]

Hot rod & soundwave meeting in three different lifetimes, they end in tragedy.

The fourth lifetime they meet is different.

..idk why i still send asks as anonymous..

Embraced in Blastwaves arms the two of them looked at the stars in awe. He snuggled against him enjoying the safety of his arms, even though he felt a lot of anxiety. His parents were pushing him to bond with a mech named Gateway who'd never been very nice to him. He did not want to marry him and wanted to marry Blastwave instead, however his parents would never allow it. Believing Blastwave was beneath them.

Earlier he heard them going over bonding arrangements between Gateway and himself.

"What's wrong?"

"My parents are trying to force me to bond with Gateway."

Blastwave pulled him closer cradling him protectively.

"I won't let them do that."

He nodded still feeling insecure.

"Will you kiss me?"

Blastwave looked at him in surprise and then nodded.

The two of them leaned in and kissed each other. Neither noticed the presence lurking angrily in the doorway.

Gateway watched the happy couple for a minute longer before walking away. If he couldn't have Emberrod no one could.

The next day when Emberrod didn't come to their usual spot he got worried. Sneaking into his room he went to check on him only to gasp, when Emberrod laid in bed unmoving. He rushed to his side desperate to wake him however he knew it was too late.

Grabbing the cup nearby he swirled it around realizing it had been poisoned. He drank the rest of it and climbed into bed with Emberrod. He pulled him closer and kissed him one last time before curling around him and dying.

The younglings were curled under their favorite cyber tree, near the back of the house and away from prying optics. Soundshade was reading while he laid against him just listening.

He found himself dozing off and was awoken by Soundshade

"Are you listening?"

He nodded, opening his optics he looked over at Soundshade. The two were so close it was easy to lean in and kiss him.

The next part was not easy. He didn't realize someone was watching. Neither of them did, until his sire grabbed him.

"No child of mine is going to go around kissing our enemies."

"Sire!"

"Let him go!"

Soundshade stood up angrily as he was yanked back.

"How dare you try and turn my child against me. I warned you about staying away from him."

"Sire stop!"

He cried out in a panic trying to free himself. His sire was heaving with rage not thinking clearly. He pulled out his gun and before he could even scream, Soundshade was laying dead. His blood seeping into the cyber grass, as he stared at him with blank optics. He let out an animal like scream filled with agony, as he collapsed to the ground.

Crawling towards Soundshade he held him sobbing and screaming so loudly he could hear his neighbors coming over to investigate.

His sire had dropped his gun staring in stunned silence. Realization crashed down on him as he stared at Soundshade.

Overtaken with grief he couldn't imagine living without Soundshade. He grabbed the nearby gun ignoring his sires shouts for him to stop and shot himself in the head. His body falling next to Soundshades as they laid together.

Sun Flare and Stereo had known each other their entire lives. Where one went the other quickly followed.

The two shared a special kind of bond and were seen as the perfect couple. The two lived together in a small house overlooking the rust sea. They planned to live there for the rest of their lives until trouble came.

The rich who ruled Cyberton with an iron fist had decreed they needed to pay more in taxes. While they went to lavish parties the people around him starved. They were a small island and could not afford to pay such high taxes. Which lead to them suffering. Many including themselves were at risk of losing their homes, when they could barely afford to eat.

It was a difficult decision but in the end Stereo was forced to join a large fishing boat, doing dangerous labor.

"I don't want you to go."

He cried as Stereo pulled him closer.

"I know, but we don't have a choice."

Stereo kissed him and he felt tears fall as he clung to him.

'I promise I'll be back."

Stereo forced himself out of his arms and climbed aboard the ship. He cried reminding him of his promise as he said goodbye.

A month before Soundwave was to return he recieved news that the boat had gone down and everyone onboard had drowned.

He'd thrown himself over the cliff wanting to return to Stereo. Unable to bare the thought of living without him.

"He's such a jerk."

He glared at the Decepticon who was sitting on the other side of Maccadams, probably plotting against them. Ever since he's been freed from the loop he's been determined to make his life miserable.

Watching the Decepticon he crossed his arms.

"I don't think I'll ever like that guy."

Much later after the Quentessons were defeated, a peace treaty was signed and Tarn was defeated. Soundwave had moved in with him and they'd been living together for a while, when they finally decided to bond.

"Are you ready?"

Soundwave looked down at him and he nodded. Opening his chest plate the room was bathed in a blue glow. Soundwave looked down at his spark in awe and opened his own chest plate.

He barely stopped himself from touching it, reminding himself that he could do it later. Now however Soundwave slowly lowered himself down until they were both gasping.

Neither could tell where one began or the other ended in that moment they were one. Both themselves in that one moment and themselves in every moment before that. After so long the two lovers could finally be together.

[bisluthq]

The whole email breakup thing always sounded ridiculous to me but since it allegedly came from a friend of Pat's, I gave it the benefit of the doubt. But yeah no that's insane, no normal person would end a 6.5 rs/engagement over email. Imo she'd planned months before for the music video to be filmed in the UK so as to be able to spend Easter break with Joe, bc both of them knew that Joe would be working until May and according to what Tree put out at the time, he'd be joining Taylor on tour after that. So I do think the MV was shot in the UK as part of an original plan to spend Easter together there. But imo from the moment she stood on that stage in Glendale on opening night and saw tens of thousands of ppl all but worshipping her, and Joe could not even be arsed to at least care about this massive career milestone, she came to the painful realization that it was time to go, and she planned to do it in person when they would see each other in the UK for Easter. So during those first weeks of tour I imagine that (aside from being extremely happy and excited for tour) she pondered how to go about it and the logistics etc yk, mentally preparing herself for it, probably going back and forth on doing it or not. Clearly she ultimately decided it had to happen this time for real, they'd been unhappy for months and I do think Joe taking another last minute job and not giving a single fuck about Eras was a final straw. So she knew it was Over over during those first weeks of tour and imo that's why she was crying during CP in Glendale N2. Anon mentioned that maybe she was apprehensive about doing it in person bc they could end up fucking and she needed to end it for real, but I don't think that was even an issue for her bc imo late stage Swiftwyn sex was like those scenes in Blue Valentine where the couple clearly has fallen out of love but they still try to have sex to get off and let out frustration but neither of them are really into it and lowkey hate it and yeah idk it's devastating to watch lol it's so fucking sad. At that point imo Swiftwyn were very unhappy and in a "you do you and I'll do me" MO so it tracks that Joe didn't see it coming right, cos they'd sorta gotten familiar/used to the unhappinness. Imo if she hadn't broken it off and instead insisted on getting married, he would've done it and they would've continued to leave unhappily and/or gotten divorced eventually, so Joe must've defs been relieved that she ended it. If they'd had kids before shit started to go down at the end of 2021, I do think they would've married for the bebé and would've probs gotten divorced once the bebé/bebés became adults a la Scott and Andrea.

I 1000% agree that she was involved emotionally with Matty since at least January of this year. Idk if I think it got to the point of actual physical cheating yk I tend to think that maybe not since her and Joe respected each other so much but she does historically cheat when she's desperate to get out of a rs so who knows 🤷🏻‍♀️ she was miserable and Matty was there all head over heels for her and ofc the attention was appealing after she'd felt so rejected/unnapreciated by her partner for months. I am SO so curious about that 1975 collab song that was scrapped from Midnights 👀👀 I wonder if it's telling of how far back (second half of 2022 maybe) the affair with Matty goes, and if she left it out of the album bc she was still trying to save her rs with Joe. I really do think that, in spite of everything, Taylor fought VERY hard to fix their issues and solve their problems, like I really do think she gave it her all trying to save it but ultimately it became clear that it was unsalvageable. When they first became a couple they both thought their lives would be going in completely different directions (she thought her peak as a pop star was gone and she would move to more BTS stuff and live a calmer life in North London with him, he thought his acting career would take off after The Favourite and CWF and he'd become some Nic Hoult/Paul Mescal etc.) than where they both are today, and so they became very incompatible to the point where all the love they had for each other wasn't enough to keep them in love together.

I love u but this is a fucking dissertation dude I’m not gonna read all this but I’m sure ur right because your takes are always on point so I’m posting for people with a longer attention span than me and I’m gonna text just now to check you’re ok lmao because dissertations about Joever are usually a sign one isn’t 😂🙈🤷🏻‍♀️

[princehoseok]

@cosmicdreamgrl tagged me 💜

who is your favourite k-pop group?

those 7 bald heads now, bts people call them

which member sparked your interest first?

ngl i cant really tell... couldve been jimin or namjoon, it was the on mv and i was obsessed with the whole thing so i started watching all their mv and yeah... definitely jimin and namjoon

who was your first bias?

after almost a year of overthinking it i decided namjoon was the one :)

what makes them your current bias?

ok heres the thing, i have a bias line, and that is the rap line so, here it goes:

namjoon: i have no idea how he does it but he says and does exactly what i need, i cannot express what i felt the first time i listened to indigo, how mono treats me... doesnt matter if i dont even know what im going through its like he knows and suddenly he's there to remind me that i am okay and everything will be okay, he's my OG, he understands me and listens to me without even trying ! its incredible, his vision... i cant, i cant understand how this works, but he makes it make sense, every single time.

yoongi: yoongi became part of my bias line last year after his tour, he wasnt even a bias wrecker, im not the army that goes through all the content, i still have so much to watch and learn, but that last day, the last concert i was coming home very late and i saw that the concert was just starting and i thought "im just gonna watch until namjoon and then im going to sleep" but i couldnt lol, i watched the whole thing, cried, and then kept crying a couple more hours because the last two years havent been the best in my personal life and i swear, the moment the concert ended and the "future's gonna be ok" screen came up it shocked me to my very core, i loved the album SO much, and i wanted to go to a concert (i couldnt but oh well), and like .. i listened and read that phrase for months and until that moment i didnt get it, that future's gonna be okay destroyed me in the best way possible and i am so thankful for min yoongi, im just very very thankful

hobi: my prince, mi amor, my everything! he makes me so happy, the way he manages his existance in this fucked up world is mind blowing, he's always taking pictures (idk why thats so special to me) and smiling, and ugh, my sister doesnt know their names very well so hoseok is "the one who laughs a lot", but then the way he takes his work so serious, he is so profesional, i loved hope world and when jitb happened i was shocked bc what is my sunshine doing with this dark eyeliner?? who made him emo? and boom that album is a motherfucking masterpiece!!!!!!! what if, arson and stop are just 😚 in general terms of music, hoseok's more my type of music, i mean more like my everyday music, (not that i dont like the others') but his style is just so cool.. he is so cool, his hype, his energy, he is my coolest boyfriend, the way a new ray of sunshine was born within him when he came to this world, i admire him so fucking much, every talented fiber of his body is precious and you want me to talk about his dancing? i cant bc this is long enough, im a sucker for dancers lets just say that... im well fed. i need him, i dont mean this in a delulu kinda way, i mean i need him and his energy, he makes me happy so i need him to be happy and gets everything he deserves because he deserves all the good things in this world!

*cough* so.. rapline because they give me life, next question..

who is your bias wrecker?

used to be taehyung but then yoongi stepped on him to be part of the bias line directly and taehyung disappeared, so at the moment jimin and jungkook drive me crazy... mostly jimin bc jk being the youngest makes me feel weird, i friendzoned him so hard from the start lmao

which members are you currently obsessing over that aren't your bias/bias wrecker?

seokjin, maybe its because he's coming back and i cant wait, that day ill cry and im so happy i miss him so much, and ive been reading seokjin fanfiction, his always makes me believe in love again idk, i love him i miss him, his voice ,.. omg im crying, give him back already

when did you first discover this group?

i believe it was the ama's performance in 2017?, i was watching the show and they performed and i didnt know them but i was so hyped lol, i was literally going WOOOOOOOOOOHOOO!!!!!!!!! at my house, and after that i think i saw a fake love performance? im not sure really, but for a couple of years the only songs i listened to were fake love and dna bc that was all i knew lol, THEN in 2020 i clicked on the ON mv bc i had a new tv and i was watching yt and it was there and i said ok lets see, it had been a couple of weeks since the video came out and yeah,.. there was no looking back no more, i believe it was the dancing for me, im a sucker for choreography and... theyre pretty good 🤠

have you ever been to one of their concerts?

no, dont remind me, i became army when the pandemic started and i didnt even tried for the ptd concerts bc the closest i had was LA and it was gonna be just impossible to get tickets so i kinda made up my mind around it, however i was destroyed when i couldnt get d day tickets... i dont want to talk about it lol, were ok ♥

what are some of your favorite songs by the group?

oh this is hard so this is ot7 only; black swan, lights, just one day, 21st century girl, pied piper, airplane pt 2 and dionysus .. that's some yeah

ok i made this too long im sorry,

whoever wants to play pls tag me, ily

[kangaracha]

🍜🍡🍚

🍜 Do you ever feel pressured to write?

this made me think so hard lmao. i don't think i've ever felt pressured to write specifically, like in the context of feeling like i absolutely need to finish this next chapter on time or whatever? i'm really aware these days of when i need to rest, push myself to not be lazy and write to see results later, and find time to let a full idea tank rip out 3k, and i don't really care about people on ao3 not being able to wait until i'm done lol

the only pressure i feel re: writing is the need to schedule time for it when i have such limited hours to offer it. i've been battling recently with the idea of needing to. rank my priorities and give time to hobbies that are important to me and neglect the ones that aren't. currently i'm trying to commit to 400 words a day on 4tw, but i need to start writing as soon as i get home, because my brain starts to melt after a couple of hours and i can't write then, and that's. sticking to that is hard sometimes. knowing that i'll only write 50 words and fall asleep if i relax and watch tiktoks instead of going straight from work to imaginary work. this was a tanget off topic. anyway.

🍡 Which of your fics was the most emotionally difficult to write?

without a doubt, part 3 and 4 of The Slaughter Of The Lambs, the assassin's creed fic. i set the plot of this fic out following canon, which means the end is. not particularly happy. i also set this fic out to explore how circumstances and people change over the course of a lifetime, and idk i once described it as 'living the life you've been given' which i think is what i'm trying to say.

the point is, i wrote these two parts of this story that are like shining, golden years, innocence of childhood, the bright future ahead. part two is just a whole ass coming of age romance. and then there was a day when i reread everything i've written so far and the things i've put down for part 3 and 4 were just so grim and gutwrenching. like the first parts were painted in bright colours and the last two were just tones of grey. and i sat there and i thought about these characters and i just don't know anymore if i can really do it or if changing the ending to be happy would be a betrayal to the hard truth of the story. and that's part of why i haven't turned back to that fic yet, because i'm still stewing on whether i change it or leave it or write two fucking endings so that not everyone has to cry.

🍚 What genre do you have the toughest time writing?

Fluffy, slice of life, or anything uhhhhhhh what's john green's genre hang on. google doesn't know. yknow, those sorts of stories where the character work is really, really forefront, not playing off an equally complex plot, which is more what i excel at.

also romance. i've been deliberately trying to play with different romances (pretty, my hand in yours, tgbyb) trying to make it something i'm more flexible at. i think i'm getting better?

[eventually--darling]

Hi! Do you have any recs from 2022 or 23 regarding rom-com kdramas like crash course in romance? I finished it today. Some of the last few I've watched have kinda traumatized me.. like snowdrop (idk why I watched that, prob cuz I wanted the lead to have a shot at love and not get shot), Why her (it's amazing, but never again), adamas (is there even a part 2?). *Clears throat* I, uh- would be grateful if you could give me some suggestions that end on a lighter and happy note.. thankyou!

Oh gosh, the pickings are a bit slim since I lean towards things that traumatize me and haven't watched a *ton* of the stuff that came out last year/this year. But there's still a few good ones!

The first one that came to mind was The Law Cafe. While it dives into some hard topics, the tone is overall lighthearted and it has a happy ending. The ml was a bit frustrating at times but he always came thru. I think it deserved better honestly like it felt like just me and three other people watched it.

Summer Strike has a murder plot but I think if you could handle the one in ccir then you can handle this. Plot-wise it is not perfect but ohhhh the couple is top ten for me. They're so so cute together and I love how they both have such soft personalities. Pairings tend to be more opposites attract so it was lovely to see two gentle people fall for each other. Also Siwan! My favorite guy ❤️

Hometown Cha Cha Cha is from 2021 but if you haven't seen it and enjoyed ccir then I think it'd be perfect for you! It has the same director so a lot of the things I liked in ccir felt reminiscent of homecha. The plot is like 90% lighthearted and it has a very happy ending. I didn't enjoy it as much as ccir but it's still really cute and well worth the watch.

Gaus Electronics is just straight unhinged comedy. Never seen a kdrama like it lol. just give the first two eps a shot (most people get put off by ep one but it mellows out) and you'll see what I mean.

The Fabulous I kinda forgot about her after ep 2 but it was a fun watch up until then at least lol and I'm p sure it has a happy ending. If you like fashion and minho (SHINee) then it's the drama for you 😌💅

Wish I had more recs but like I said I haven't watched a ton of recently airing stuff, much less non-traumatizing stuff. Hope you find someone you like. ❤️❤️❤️

[thefevercodepdf]

this is gonna be very personal and tmi. warning for suicidal ideation, etc.

i rewatched the death cure earlier tonight, and my reactions were just as i predicted. i cried and cried and cried, and it changed me all over again. i was reborn again. i say this with complete seriousness and sincerity, the death cure saved my life. when i watched it the day it came out in theatres, i was in the midst of my first horrible depression. i'd just had something traumatizing happen to me, and i felt so alone and empty and hopeless. i spent every waking moment planning ways to kill myself, and honestly the only refuge i had was this stupid book and movie series. the image of newt holding a gun to his head terrified me so deeply that it was all i could see when i closed my eyes for the next week or so. these are things that i didn't fully understand until years later, but seeing someone (a fictional character) that i loved so much try so hard to kill himself shook something in me, something that told me i would cause the same devastation if i did it too. i didn't say those words or think them then, because there was no way i would have genuinely believed it. but i still took newts last words to heart, because he did mean so much to me and i just needed something to keep me afloat. every time i felt myself drowning again, i'd watch the death cure. i always say it's because i needed an excuse to cry, which is true, but i also just needed to have space to love (these fictional characters), i needed to see how much people can love each other, i needed to see that it's possible to have a life at the end of all the hardship, i needed to hear someone say, "You deserve to be happy." it's cheesy but it kept me going and it's keeping me going now. there are jokes about imagining that your fav is proud of you for being where you are, and it is so cheesy but sometimes it was all i needed and all that kept me going: i know that if he were here, he would be proud of me. it really fucking hurts though that the last time i really needed to feel like "Newt is proud of me and i need to keep going" i was younger than him, and now i am older than him. that hurts bad. but whatever. i deserve to be happy and i want to be happy, damn it!!! i have had suicidal thoughts since i was eight years old and i never learned what it's like to truly be happy, but damn it i'll figure it out!!! i don't want to succumb to whatever tragedy of my life exists, and not even fight against it. i am so tired of this way of living.

it's just right place right time, really, the reason i attached to the maze runner. there are so many other things out there that would give me what i needed and in a much better way too. but idk this is what happened. that's fine. if watching the death cure is what literally pushed me to live another day, then another, and another, i don't want to be embarrassed or regretful or anything. it saved me. in tandem with a couple other things sure. like one of my high school teachers telling the story of one of his previous students who killed herself. one time my best friend in college got wasted and sobbed over the toilet because he didn't want me to die, and that for sure woke me the fuck up.

ok enough yapping! no one will see this anyway and im just posting this for archival reasons. hello me from the future who is rereading this. i really hope you're doing well. i hope i did good by you.

[somnianyx]

Gender Neutral Reader || Soulmate Au || Angst

Sealed with a kiss: Your soulmate's name appears on your wrist after you admitted you fell in love with them. You'll die after a year if you failed to secure a kiss with them. - Riddle

Warning: Death.

A/N: Idk even know if this can be called a Riddle x reader cuz...Trey got more screen time but eh. Also not a cheating fic. Riddle is not cheating.

Once upon a time...

What hurts worse than falling in love with your soulmate who already shared that special bond with someone else?

There was a pair of soulmates

Nothing. Knowing that you'll die after a year is just rubbing salt into the wound. Can you believe that? Just because I finally admitted to myself that I'm in love with that rose red tyrant, who's dating my sister.

Who realized they loved each other too late.

I should've just deny my feelings till the very end. I shouldn't even fell in love with him in the first place. This is my punishment, for the sake of their happiness. Still...

Until death do them part

I'll continue loving you until my last breath, Riddle Rosehearts

You surprised Trey by knocking on his apartment door at 3 am. Before he could scold you, he was already trapped in your embrace.

Trey comforted you as you cried in his chest, rubbing circles behind your back. It had been a couple of hours since you've admitted your feelings, the dreadful hours you spent looking at his name that was etched onto your wrist until you die. Visible only to you.

When your sobbing had died down a little, he guided you to his kitchen and sat you down. He prepared your favorite snacks and drink and watched as you munch them sadly.

You explained everything to him. When he didn't respond, you looked up to find a surprising sight. His mouth agape, eyes wide, he looked like he was about to cry.

And he did.

The usual calm and collected big brother Trey, was crying. You panicked a little, as it was your first time seeing him like this, you didn't know what to do.

Afraid of making things worse, you opted to hug him and let him cry it out. Like he always did for you. He wrapped his arm around your waist, burying his face into your chest.

You proceeded to pet his hair, also what he always do to you, his sobbing dying down into sniffles. Even when he calmed down, you didn't stop.

He hesitantly let go of you, wanting to wipe his glasses that's covered in tears.

"We should go to Rosalie's house," he stood up, grabbed your wrist and headed straight to the door.

"What? Why?" You tried to stop and pull your hand away, it only made his grip on you tighten.

"We have to tell them everyth-"

"Wait! Hold on! Are you insane?! No fucking way!"

"Yes fucking way! Do you think I'm gonna sit here and watch you slowly wither for a year?!"

"T-Trey please! It's hurts!" You cried in pain.

He stopped in his track, finally realizing what he's doing and you immediately pulled away. Rubbing your wrist, you just hope its wouldn't cause any bruising.

He looked down with guilt and shame written on his face. Though he was panicking, he shouldn't have hurt you. "I- I'm so sorry (Y/N). I-"

"Trey. It's fine. Thank you for apologizing." You cut him off, knowing that he's just gonna go on an apology rampage.

You spunned him around, cupping both of his cheeks, "Listen, Rosalie is planning on proposing to him soon. I don't wanna mess this up for them. You'll do it for me won't you?"

Looking into your pleading eyes, he hesitantly agrees. You smiled at him, "Let's keep this a secret between us and make this the best year ever!"

Nothing had changed much from that day, well except for the fact that you had gone on more adventurous trips with your best friends. You're eating expensive meals, going scuba diving etc. Trying out all the fun stuff! You felt so happy to be able to spend more time with them.

Half a year passed by before your health started to slowly deteriorate. You became weak, lethargic and clumsier than usual. You would doze off, daydream more often and even wander around aimlessly until your legs couldn't support you anymore by the 9th month.

Your parents had been trying to figure out ways to help you. They hired the best doctors, psychiatrists, anything! None of them could find out the source of your illness.

Whenever a new one came every week, Trey would bite his lip and avoid any sort of contact with them. He feared that if he even look at them, he would break down and confess everything. Breaking his promise to you.

Riddle had been trying his best to seem calm but anyone could tell that he was growing irritated and anxious day by day. You feared that one day he might just snap and collar an innocent doctor for not being able to cure you.

Riddle had been staying by your side and tending to whatever you needed. He would hold your hand, fix your hair and talk to you even with the lack of response. He never once left your side unless he had to. He even moved in with you.

You loved his affection of course but you couldn't help and wonder if Rosalie was fine with this. If she was unhappy, boy she's doing a hell of a fine job masking it. Or maybe because your mind is growing fuzzy that you couldn't tell people's emotions as well as you used to.

"My rose, it's almost lunch. I'll go prepare your meals" Riddle says as he tried to stand up before you caught his wrist, gripping it tight.

You mumbled something in a soft voice, one that's almost impossible to catch if he weren't listening.

"I...I love you Riddle"

You confessed, grip slipping as you took your last breath.

Riddle was stunned, he stood there for a few good minutes. Trying to process your confession before realizing what's happening.

"(Y/N)?" He called out, gently nudging you for any sort of reaction. Nothing.

He began furiously shaking you, "M-my rose! T-this isn't funny! Wake up!" Still nothing.

He knelt beside you and held your hand tightly, "My r-rose...p-please wake up. I love you too so please-"

His pleading was cut short as a golden glow emitted on his wrist, leaving only your name behind. The truth dawned on him but it was too late to regret it now.

"This must be my punishment.."

[mypoisonedvine]

𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮 𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙡 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 (𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐𝘐) || sub!bucky barnes x dominatrix!reader

(𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐)

𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 || your newest client asks you to give him a real challenge, and you’re happy to oblige.  

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 || 6.3k

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 || smut but no actual sex (lots of handjob stuff though and some brief oral m receiving), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, more cnc (because of the overstimulation), bondage, edging, impact play (riding crop), brief cock torture (she just hits him with the crop a couple times), implied “kink as trauma response” (this is gonna be a theme throughout the whole fic), forced to break a rule/doomed to fail/impossible challenge (idk how to warn for this but yeah), forced voyeurism?, thigh riding (reader rides bucky’s thigh), some degradation/dumbification, brief/implied dacryphilia, a bit of angst/feelings

new parts posted on thursdays!  join the taglist here

“Can’t,” he sighed, “can’t come again.”

He looked so painfully adorable when he begged like that, his brow glistening with sweat as he jerked under your touch.  “Aw, poor baby,” you pouted, twisting your hand when it stroked over the head of his cock, “yes you can.  I know you can.  Just gimme one more.”

“F-fuck,” he whimpered, “Mistress, please— just stop, please, I can’t… can’t take any more…”

“I know you can, sweetheart— I know you can be my good boy and keep coming for me.  Tell me your color.”

“Yellow,” he whispered.

“Think you’re almost done?” you pressed, smiling when he nodded breathlessly.  “Yeah, there’s my good boy— gonna come again for your Mistress?”

“Yes,” he breathed, baring his teeth as his hips bucked wildly to try to avoid further sensation, “y-yes, one more, just one more, I’m gonna— fuck, gonna come, just don’t stop… fuck, it hurts.”

“I know, but you’re being so good for me,” you purred.  “You like it when I milk your pretty cock, don’t you?  Even though it hurts?”

He winced but nodded.  “C-coming, Mistress, fuck, I’m coming…!”

Since it was his fifth of the evening, he could only give you one thick drop of come that gathered at his slit before running down over your hand which finally slowed to a stop.

You both sighed with relief as you pulled your hand away and leaned back, admiring how beautiful he looked as he caught his breath, covered in come and sweat.

"Good job," you praised with a chuckle, "I hope I didn't go too hard on you."

"N-no, that was… that was really good," he sighed, slumping back onto the bed.  "Can I use your shower before I go?"

"Yeah, totally," you nodded.

After a long pause, you gave him a confused look.  

"I thought you were gonna shower?" you reminded him.

"Oh… I guess I have to get up for that," he sighed, making you laugh.

"Rest a bit longer.  You've had a… challenging afternoon."

He nodded a little and you got up from the bed to go wash your hands and freshen up a little, smiling at your own appearance in the mirror— sometimes you forgot how you looked when you did this, but there was an undeniable aura of power around you… especially after a session like that.

This was only your third week with James, and already the dynamic felt so natural between you— and yet, so fresh compared to your other clients.  Normally it took longer for a newbie to get comfortable with you, yet most of them had had multiple doms before and here was James, totally inexperienced and taking it all like a champ.  There was an air of innocence about him, you figured, in contrast to this undeniable strength and intensity that you caught glimpses of from time to time.

Sometimes, it felt like he was chasing an innocence he lost a long time ago.  Whatever it was that drew him to this, you were happy to help him along the way.

It was probably a little dangerous to enjoy sessions with a client so much; even though you often pretended that everything was about your pleasure and not theirs, obviously since they were the paying customer it was the complete opposite in reality.  But there was an equity to the dynamic with you and Bucky, he served you with a real dedication rather than for his own gain.  And you, meanwhile, had rediscovered the fun in this career that had originally drawn you to it in the first place.  It was less like a science now, more like an art— you let yourself go with your instincts and do whatever felt right in the moment, and both of you benefitted for it.  

“Come on, get up and clean yourself off,” you encouraged— gently, of course— as you left the bathroom and returned to find James laying sprawled out on the bed.

“I know you said falling asleep here was a one-time courtesy,” he remembered with a smile, “but I could use it now a lot more than I needed it then.”

Honestly, you didn’t see him smile that often.  It was pleasant; you hoped to see it again.  He did get up, though, and take the washcloth you handed him to wipe off the come that had gotten all over him.  “What are you thinking for next week?” you asked as you leaned against the wall.  “Any special requests?”

“We can discuss all that over the phone,” he decided.  You still didn’t understand fully why he didn’t like to discuss future scenes in person; it was like he wanted the in-person interactions to be as ‘in character’ (if you will) as possible.

“Alright, just keep me updated,” you requested with a shrug.

You got changed while he took his shower, and when he emerged to the living room he seemed surprised to see you sitting on your own couch.  After a moment, you realized it was the fact that you were in normal clothes that threw him off.  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in jeans before… or pants of any kind.”

You looked down at your outfit with a smile, glad it was at least still professional and not sweats and a t-shirt or something.  “Yeah, I guess you haven’t.  First time for everything, right?”

“Yeah, had a lot of first times with you,” he chuckled.  “Most significantly less mundane than this.”

A brief silence filled the room but it wasn’t exactly awkward, at least not for you.

“Well, I’ll see you next week,” he decided as he grabbed his jacket from your chair and slipped it on.  You’d been spending most of this session trying to forget how good he looked in the leather motorcycle cut, so that was out the window now as you tried to keep from visibly biting your lip while he walked towards the door.

Damn, he was fine.  But there were more pressing matters at hand.  Like preparing yourself and your apartment for your next appointment.  This guy wanted to get slapped around until he cried… shouldn't be too difficult, but your arms would probably be sore tomorrow.

Opposite of last week, I really want you to edge me tonight, as long as possible.

Don't go easy on me, make me hold it in.  I need a challenge this week.

-J

It was odd how emails from James made your week.

He seemed to prefer to communicate his desire with you this way; maybe it was easier for him, and you couldn’t really blame him for that.  The nice part was that you didn’t have to temper your reactions, if you had any, since you were always alone when you got his messages.  You might be old hat at it now, but you could remember a time that you had to hide a grimace when a client told you to your face what he wanted.  Not that you would shame them for it or anything (unless, you know, they paid you to), but you didn’t enjoy everything you did with these men.

Did you enjoy everything you did with James?  Yes, but you were pretending not to— for your own sake.

You dressed a bit differently for today’s session, more conservatively… not that it was especially conservative by any other person’s standards.  But it left your legs and chest covered, somewhat in the spirit of ‘mean corporate businesswoman’ aesthetically.  For some reason you felt like using a riding crop required wearing pants.

James certainly didn’t seem to mind, with the way he nervously cleared his throat after you opened the door.

“Good to see you again,” you greeted formally, “please, come in.”

He stepped past you, still looking at you and not at what was in front of him, meaning he ended up slamming himself gut-first into your kitchen island.

“Oh!  Are you alright?” you smiled when you noticed. 

“Yeah, I’m good,” he nodded, rubbing his stomach for a second but recovering quickly.  “I told you I can take a lot of pain,” he joked.

“Well, we’re going to put that to the test today,” you promised cryptically.  “You must’ve seen the crop on the table.”

He nodded again.  “Yeah....”

“Are you looking forward to it?”

“Yes,” he answered, a bit too quickly.

“Then let’s get you tied up, James.”

Straddling his lap, you realized the rope was a bit too tight when you saw it digging into his skin; maybe he wouldn’t mind that, but you did, so you pushed the rope back through itself to loosen it slightly.

“How long did it take you to learn all these knots?” he asked casually, watching your fingers nimbly work the ropes around his wrists.

“Not too long,” you shrugged, “I’ve only been doing this a few years… but I knew them before that.”

“Boating school?  Boy Scouts?” he suggested jokingly.

“Just a hobby,” you decided, dodging the covert question about your past.  “Were you a Boy Scout?”

“Do I look like a Boy Scout?” he countered with a scoff.

“Not anymore,” you shrugged, “but I bet you did once.  You’re sorta innocent, you know.”

He swallowed dryly, and you raised an eyebrow as you glanced from the knot you were tightening to his face, which looked a bit flustered.  “R-really?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed, leaning back on your heels to look at him straight-on.  “Are you surprised to hear that?”

He nodded quickly, and you laughed.

“Aw, you thought you were so kinky, huh?  So dirty,” you purred, running your hand up his leg until he tugged slightly on the newly-tied ropes— a subtle way to get him to test them for you.  “But you’re really not.  You’re just my sweet, innocent boy.”

He whined— really, properly whined— and you dug your nails into his skin until he hissed instead.

“I don’t think you believe me,” you noticed, leaning back to reach for the crop behind you.  “You think you’re so filthy and perverted, right?  Are you a pervert, James?”

“Yes,” he breathed, shivering as you let the crop slide gently over his skin— his abs, his hips, his legs which were already quivering so adorably.  “Yes, Mistress.”

“And how’s that?”

“I think about… getting hurt,” he admitted weakly, “when I touch myself.  And I touch myself all the fucking time.”

“Yeah?  How many times a day do you stroke that pretty cock, James?”

“Twice every morning,” he blurted out, “after that it depends.”

You didn’t let yourself show your surprise at that number.  “Depends on what?”

When he hesitated, you hit him sharply on the thigh and he winced.  “Depends on what I… what I end up thinking about.  Sometimes… sometimes something reminds me, and I have to get off.”

Something told you not to press on what it was that he needed to be reminded of, and why it made him want to jerk off so bad.  Something told you he wasn’t ready to tell that story yet.  “Did you touch yourself today already?” you asked instead.

“No, no ma’am,” he shook his head, voice wavering as you brushed the crop over his chest, “it’s… it’s different with you.”

“Yeah, I bet it is,” you smirked, hitting him on the stomach quickly.  “I bet you’re finally satisfied, right?  Nothing’s ever worked for you before.”

“Yes,” he moaned, crying out slightly when you hit him on the arm (flesh— you were too afraid what sound the metal one would make) much harder than before.  “The nights I see you, I… I can sleep.”

“You sleep better?”

“No, I just… sleep.”

You tried not to react to that, moving to a new question instead.  “Do you want me to hit you again?  Or do you want me to stroke your cock for you?”

An obvious choice to some, surely, but he seemed to really struggle with it.

“Which one do you think you deserve?” you asked instead.

“Hit me more,” he decided.

Instantly, you struck him once on the face and again on the shoulder, then moved down to his legs for three in a row in spite of the way his body jerked away instinctively.  

“Fuck,” he sobbed, “don’t stop— I need more…”

You focused on his legs, on the inside of his thigh where he seemed the most sensitive.  His twisted joy turned to true fear, though, when you brushed the end of the crop over his balls.  “Do you want me to hit you here?” you challenged.

“I… I don’t know,” he stammered.

“Let’s make a deal, James,” you offered, “wherever I hit you, I’m gonna kiss it to make it better.”

“Then hit me wherever you want,” he nodded, almost smiling at you.  He cried through his teeth when you whipped his shaft with the crop— not especially hard, in fact quite delicately, though the second was harder.  And the third, though not much more aggressive, was right on the sensitive tip; his eyes shot open and his hips jerked away.

“So good, such a good boy,” you whispered proudly, putting the crop aside to lean in and kiss his cheek where you’d hit him before, his shoulder, his arm.

You worked your way down carefully as he breathed heavily beneath you, whimpering slightly when you kissed his thighs and notably ignored his flexing, leaking cock.  “Please,” he whimpered.

“Shh, be patient,” you soothed, “be my good boy.”

“Your good boy,” he repeated, trying to restrain himself but already bucking up into the air again, “fuck, wanna be your good boy, Mistress.”

“Are you already close, pet, just from getting hurt?” you asked in a faux pout.  “You’re not gonna come if I give your pretty cock some kisses, right?”

“I— I won’t come,” he promised.  “Not until I get permission.”

“Baby, it’s gonna be a long fuckin’ time before you get permission,” you promised with a toothy grin.  “Look down at me, honey, I want you to see this.”

He hesitated for a second but obeyed, looking down at you with an expression that was full of awe as you gripped his cock and gave gentle, teasing kisses up his shaft.  It bobbed in your hands with each one, and he let out the most beautiful sigh when you kissed the tip carefully.

A wide lick made him jerk beneath you.  “F-Fuck,” he stammered.

“You said you wouldn’t come,” you reminded him.  “Can I keep going?  Are you gonna be a good boy?”

“Don’t stop, please,” he breathed, “I’ll be good.”

Taking the head between your lips, you suckled gently as he shivered and moaned.  You weren’t sure you’d ever been with anybody— on or off the clock— who was so sensitive.  And you loved it, honestly; who could resist those precious noises he made?

As much as part of you wanted to go nuts and really push him to the edge, you tried to be gentle and careful so as not to make it impossible for him to hold back.  But even then, when you gently grasped his balls in one of your hands and squeezed them, he apparently couldn’t take anymore.

"S-stop," he hissed, and you pulled back, sitting up.

"You were close?" you asked, and he nodded a little.  "Oh, what a good boy."

He whimpered briefly.  "Yes, your good boy, Mistress…"

Your fingers trailed delicately up the underside of his cock, making him shiver violently.  "I know you want to come, but you want to be good even more.  You're such a sweet little pet."

It seemed like the praises did more to keep him on the edge than the touches, so you kept both going; wrapping your fingers around the ridge of his head, you gave the most gentle and subtle strokes, and leaned in to whisper against his ear.

“Is this why you wanted me to edge you today, James?  So you could show me how good you can be?” 

“I-I don’t know,” he blurted out, rocking his hips as best he could while restrained, “I just wanted to… I just wanted you to make me wait.”

“Well, you don’t need to worry about that,” you laughed slightly, “I can make you wait all day.  Is that what you want?”

“No, that’s— not that long, I can’t wait that long,” he shuddered.

“Mm, that sounds like your problem, not mine,” you smirked.  “Not sure why I asked what you want, honestly… cause I don’t fucking care.”

His choked-out whine was too perfect to ignore.

“Oh, what a pathetic little moan that was, poor baby,” you cooed mockingly, “are you regretting it now?  You’re probably wondering what you got yourself into, ‘cause you’re worried Mistress is never gonna let you come.”

“No, I don’t regret it,” he denied weakly, “whatever you want— do whatever you want to me, just… give me what I deserve, please.”

You stopped touching him completely and he straight-up sobbed.  “You don’t deserve anything from me, James.  You don’t deserve me at all.”

He told you before that he liked when you rapidly cycled between soft and mean.  Kept him on his toes, apparently.  Honestly, you felt a little guilty talking to him that way sometimes, but his cock leaking enough pre-cum to soak the bedsheets beneath him was a sign you were doing something right.  “I know!” he cried.  “I know, fuck, I’m sorry, but I need you.  I fucking need you, Mistress, please— you know I’ll do anything.”

“I’m feeling generous today,” you shrugged, “so I won’t ask you for much.  Just beg me a little more.”

“Please, pleasepleaseplease,” he rushed, “touch me.  Anywhere, whatever you want, I just need to feel you.  I know I… fuck, I know I don’t deserve it, but let me try to— to earn it.  Please.”

You knew if he had it his way, he wouldn’t do much talking at all.  But you couldn’t just let him have it his way, now could you?  It was better to make him just the right amount of nervous, just the slightest hair uncomfortable, by making him talk to you.  And, of course, you liked the way his deep and rough voice got all whiny and needy like this.

One finger under his chin guided him to look up at you, those pretty blue eyes watery and sparkling and wide with misplaced innocence.

“Tell me who you belong to, James,” you instructed darkly.

“You, Mistress,” he whispered, “I’m yours, I— oh fuck…”

Unshockingly, he was reduced to only moans again when you started stroking his cock, the slick precum making every movement smoother.  “All mine, huh?  My little toy?” you confirmed, but he could only nod and swallow thickly.

You sped up quickly, getting faster and faster until you were really, properly jerking him off and he was biting hard on his lip.  Just when he seemed to really fall into it, get almost comfortable, you had to stop.

"Oh, fuck—" he gasped, bucking his hips up to try to chase your hand when you pulled away, but it was no use with him tied up.  You watched his cock bob in the air and smiled.

“Did you think it was going to be that easy?” you smirked.

Shaking his head, you tilted yours to look at him, reaching up to trace your fingers over his chest.  

“Don’t lie, baby, you thought I was gonna let you come, didn’t you?  You’re so sweet, James, and so, so stupid.”

He gasped, and for a second you thought you might’ve gone too far, but it shifted to a moan quickly and you realized he was having the time of his life.

“Just my dumb, brainless little toy,” you continued with a snarl, watching him tug at the ropes as his eyes fluttered shut.  “It’s okay, James, it’s okay… you don’t need to think, I don’t want your mind.  It’s useless.  I want this pretty cock, that’s all I want from you.”

“It’s all yours, Mistress,” he promised, cheeks burning bright red and eyes forced shut.  “All of it, I swear.”

“I know,” you cooed, holding his face gently to soothe him a bit.  But then your other hand wrapped around his cock and he was anything but soothed.  “Shh, shh, don’t make any sounds, you’re just a toy and toys need to stay quiet.”

You missed his noises, actually, but he looked so cute biting his lip and struggling to suppress them.  His cock was so swollen in your hand that you honestly wondered if it was somehow getting bigger.  Was that even possible?  Your mouth was watering regardless.

“I’m gonna give you a little break,” you promised gently, “but I’ll be honest, pretty boy… I don’t think you’re gonna like it one bit.”

The look he gave you beautifully balanced fear with anticipation, and you stopped stroking him to reach over towards the bedside drawer and pull out a vibrator.

“Your Mistress is feeling a little.... self-indulgent today,” you winked.  “And since I, unlike you, don’t need to hold myself back from coming, I think I might as well get myself off if I want to.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed dryly, watching you closely as you stood up off the bed and started to carefully undress yourself.  It was a lot more fun to get naked when you were wearing something that didn’t actually show much skin— the button-up seemed to really get him going, his tongue mindlessly darting out to lick his lips as you opened one button at a time.

Once it was off your shoulders and on the floor, and he could see the almost-transparent bra you had on, you moved to opening your trousers as well.  Just to be mean, you faced the other way as you pushed them down over your ass; you heard his breath catch and you smirked to yourself, spinning to face him again in just the matching, dark red bra and panty set.

“What do you think, do you like this better than the black ones?” you asked coyly.

“I like you naked better than both,” he answered, and you grinned.

“I’m gonna let that backtalk slide just once because it’s not worth my time to go over there and slap you for it,” you decided.  “But don’t test me, James.”

“Yes, Mistress,” he answered dutifully, sounding a bit out of breath as he watched you climb back onto the bed, positioning yourself carefully.

You faced him straight-on and laid your legs over his, meaning your lace-covered pussy was in full view and only inches from his leaking cock— the damn thing looked sore by now, purple at the tip and just as desperate for attention as the rest of him.

When you pulled the fabric aside to show him your cunt, he hissed and looked away.

“Look at me, James, keep your eyes open,” you demanded, seeing how totally wrecked he looked when he turned his head back to you and stared down at your body with half-lidded eyes.  “Look at how fucking soaked my pussy is.  You remember how it feels to be inside it, don’t you?”

He swallowed, sighed, and finally (just barely) nodded.

“You remember how hot and wet and tight it is, don’t you?”

“Y-yes,” he choked.

“Well, that memory’s all you’ve got to work with, sweet boy, because I don’t think I’m ever gonna let you fuck this pussy again.”

He really, properly sobbed, tears streaming down his cheeks, and those arms flexed against the ropes defiantly.  “N-no, please—” 

“I’m gonna make myself come with this,” you promised, interrupting him as you grabbed the vibe, “and I want you to remember how it feels when I come around you, okay?  

Turning it on, you wasted no time pressing it to your clit, moving the end of the toy in slow circles and keeping a close eye on him as he watched you.  Your intention had always been to give him a show, but the embarrassing thing was how little of it was an act.  Ironically, even though you’d been edging him this whole time, having to touch him that way without any pleasure for yourself was almost as torturous.  You’d soaked through your panties by the time you had him tied up, to be totally honest.  So, giving into it and letting yourself feel good was a breeze.

“Think about when I was riding you, James,” you instructed, your own voice clearly affected by your pleasure now.  “Think about how good it would feel if I let you come inside me.”

“Oh, god,” he cried, leaning his head back.

“Think about my pussy milking every fucking drop of come out of you.  You know I wouldn’t let you stop until I was completely full of your come, I bet you’d like that.  I bet you’d like to eat your come out of me, you sick little pervert.”

“Fuck!” he yelped, tugging at the ropes harder now— for a second you thought he might really break them and jump you.  And for a second, you knew you’d let him.  It made your walls clench as you imagined facing the consequences of driving a man to the brink of insanity until he couldn’t help but fuck you like an animal.  It was a good thing he didn’t see you bite your lip as you imagined that.

“You know what I’m thinking about?” you taunted.  

“God, don’t tell me,” he sighed through his teeth, but obviously you ignored him.

“I’m thinking about what a good boy you are for me,” you cooed, your hips starting to rock up against where you held the end of the vibrator; you pressed it down harder onto your clit and moaned instantly.  “Yeah, I’m thinking about how pretty you look when you’re all desperate and needy and fucking pathetic—”

“Oh—” he choked.

“My dumb litlte whore, that’s all you are, James,” you groaned.  “I know you wish you could touch me, it’s all you can think about, right?  That pretty head of yours would be completely empty if it weren’t for thoughts of me and how badly you want me.  Right?”

“Yes,” he whispered huskily.

A shiver ran up your spine when the vibrator bumped into a more sensitive part of you, and you did it again and again until you thought you might lose it a bit faster than you meant to.  “This toy feels really good,” you informed him in a purr, gasping when you slipped the vibrating body of it into your pussy, “but it doesn’t feel as good inside me as you do.”

His eyes fell shut but he still winced a bit every time you made a sound; he couldn’t run from this, no matter how hard he tried.

“Oh James,” you moaned loudly, fucking yourself with the vibe for a moment before you pulled it back out to focus even harder on your clit, “I’m gonna come.  I’m so, so close… I can feel it getting stronger, I think I might make a mess on these sheets.  And the only way I’m ever gonna let you come is if you watch me do it.  So open your fucking eyes.”

He blinked quickly as he opened them, gaze scanning your whole body before settling on your cunt; you were sure he could see it pulsing as you got closer and closer, you knew he was imagining how it would feel.  You only spared a brief glimpse at his cock, bobbing between his legs, and wished you could just slip it in you now and come while it stretched you out. 

But that wasn’t what he was here for, sadly, and you were sure you were the only being truly denied of your desires, despite how it probably seemed from the outside.

“Oh my god,” you breathed, numbness starting to tingle in your legs as your orgasm built up quicker than even you expected.  “I’m coming— James, I’m coming, oh, fuck… right there— yes!”

A gush of heat warmed your cunt at the same time that shocks ran up your spine and down your limbs; you could feel your legs shaking, and you knew he could, too.  

It got so intense for a second that you had to pull the vibrator away, though you didn’t stop coming until a few moments later, eyes falling shut without you meaning for them to.

You actually laughed a bit, breathlessly, as you turned the vibe off and set it aside, although you weren’t sure exactly what was supposed to be funny about this per se.  When you opened your eyes, you saw James looking down and looking positively defeated.  But he looked tense, too, and you sat up on your wobbly legs to get closer to his face.  

“Relax, James,” you told him firmly as you examined him.

“I— I can’t,” he whispered. 

“Why not?”

“I’ll come.”

Nothing could fight your wide grin anymore, not when you heard that.  “Oh, baby… are you about to come without even being touched?  Is that how much you liked watching Mistress come?”

He nodded, ever so slightly, and you laughed.  Not quite a mocking laugh, moreso impressed.  Prideful, even.  You leaned in to give a wet kiss to his neck, licking over his pulse as he shivered violently.

“That’s my good boy,” you whispered against his skin.  He whined and you cooed soothingly right away, “oh I know, I know.  It’s so unfair, isn’t it?  Mistress gets to come and you don’t…”

“Please,” he stammered, “I’m so close, let me come, please.”

“But I don’t wanna see you come, baby— I wanna see you cry.”

You started to slide your hand down his chest and he jumped up to attention as he tried to squirm away.  “No, please, don’t— don’t touch my cock, not if I can’t come.”

“You can hold it in, can’t you?” you pouted.

“No, I can’t, I can’t,” he sobbed, watching fearfully as your hand moved down to his stomach and over his hips.  

“But I thought you were my good boy,” you frowned, suddenly wrapping your hand tight around his cock as he choked on a gasp.

“Mistress!” he sobbed.  “Please, don’t—  don’t move your hand, I’ll come.”

"Never fucking tell me what to do," you instructed firmly, just barely stroking as he cried weakly.  "I'm gonna touch you however I want and you're not gonna come because you're my good boy, right?"

"No, Mistress, I can't stop it, I'm gonna come— stop, please…"

"You'd better not fucking come," you hissed through your teeth, speeding up your movements and watching his eyes shoot wide open, "you'd better hold it in until I'm done with you."

"I'm trying— please slow down, can't take it—"

You shook your head, tutting disapprovingly.  "No, baby, I tell you what you can take."

"Oh— oh god, Mistress, please, please stop, please, I c-can't— fuck!"

You pulled your hand away the second his cock started to flex but it was too late: come was shooting from his swollen tip and painting his chest and stomach.  You didn't even wait until he was done to backhand him across the face.

"I'm sorry!" he yelled.  "I'm so sorry, I couldn't help it…"

You softened slightly when you heard his broken voice, saw the desperation and fear on his face— it was real, more real than the fake ‘no’s and the encouraging pleas for mercy.  "Baby, it's okay, you tried so hard," you soothed instantly.

Hope filled his eyes just as much as tears as he looked up at you.  "Am I still your good boy?"

"Always," you smiled, caressing his face where it was already turning red from your slap.  

You reached down and caressed his cock with the back of your fingers, watching it flex weakly.  

“Let’s get you cleaned up, alright?”

His lip twitched, almost like a wince.  “Do we… do we have to stop?”

You quickly glanced at the clock.  “Um, no,” you mumbled, “we still have time.  Just tell me what you want.”

“I wanna watch you come again…” he admitted softly.  “Is… is that okay?”

Although you weren’t sure what you’d been expecting, you were still surprised.  “Yeah, sure.”

“But… but closer this time,” he added, “not so far away.”

You were literally laying on top of him, how did that count as far away? 

“I wanna see your face,” he clarified.

“Okay,” you nodded, deciding to indulge him.  It was sort of like aftercare, except that this wasn’t exactly the ‘after’ part yet.

On your knees beside where he was leaning back against the headboard, you slipped your hand down into the lace panties again, finding your clit still swollen but not too sensitive.  A little gasp fell from your lips when you touched it, rubbing it carefully with two fingers while he looked up at your face.  

You felt slightly exposed when he watched you this close, and you didn’t know where to look to avoid direct eye contact.  Looking at his lips was just a little too tempting, so that wouldn’t work.

“My hands are a little tired,” you explained, “they might cramp up.  Maybe I could use your thigh…”

“O-okay,” he nodded, and you removed your fingers from your panties to sit down on the thick muscle of his leg.  You felt him tense up under you slightly, and you carefully began to rock your hips until your clit rubbed just right against the inside of your underwear.  Surely he could feel how wet you were— actually, you both could hear it, almost a wet clicking-like noise as the soaked lace slid against your skin.

The dynamic shifted slightly, not that you minded it, as he watched you ride him carefully.  Just as he couldn’t hide much from you when he was naked and tied up and baring his soul to you in the kinkiest way possible, you couldn’t hide your pleasure from him when he was looking at your face so up-close.  You let your hands carefully roam his body, narrowly avoiding the trails of cooling come he’d left on his stomach and chest, until you found his strong shoulders and held onto them for balance.

“Fuck,” you mumbled to yourself, biting your lip as your sore clit throbbed against his hard, muscular thigh.  

“Will you… could you kiss me?” he requested quietly, and your heart broke a little bit.  You shook your head, and he nodded in understanding.

“I’ll kiss you here,” you offered instead, whispering against his skin before you pressed your lips to his forehead, then his cheek, then his jaw.  “Is that better, James?”

“It helps,” he agreed in a sigh.  

“I’m close,” you warned quietly, pressing your cheek to his and weaving one hand into his hair.  “I’m gonna come again, on your thigh.”

“Let me touch you,” he begged, “just a little, please…”

You nodded, about to reach forward to untie one of his hands, but he snapped the ropes and you had totally forgotten he could do that.  He quickly ran his touch all over your body, calloused hands and bound wrists in stark contrast to your soft skin.  The metal one was a little cold but it didn’t bother you; the other was almost too hot, and it was like being warmed and cooled all at once.

He ran his fingers down your spine, he gripped one of your shoulders, he rubbed your legs: he did everything he must have been wishing he could do this whole time, even gasping as he ran one hand up your chest and over a cup of your bra.  Just as you sensed that he was about to ask if he could touch you there, you nodded and felt his metal hand tug down the red lace and grab your breast— thankfully not very hard, though he did give your nipple a quick pinch which made you gasp.

Burying his face in the crook of your neck, he finally settled his hands on holding your hips, just tight enough to slightly guide your movements as you rocked faster and more desperately.  “Please come,” he begged weakly, “Mistress, please… use me.”

It sort of hit you all at once then, like a punch to the gut.  Except, you know, a lot more fun than getting punched in the gut.

“James,” you gasped, legs quivering where they straddled his as a new patch of slick soaked the lace (and presumably his thigh as well).  He held you tight, kept you moving through it while your fingers tangled in his hair and your mouth fell slack for another, louder moan.

The way his lips moved over your skin, laving your collarbones and pulse point and the innermost corner of your jaw, was positively worshipful; reverent.  “Mistress,” he whispered, almost sounding like praise but tinted with awe.  Your movements slowed down to a stop and the two of you breathed a sigh together, unintentionally.  “Thank you,” he mumbled.

“What for?” you asked, blinking quickly and looking down at him, coming back to reality (though you weren’t quite sure where else it was that you had just been).

“I dunno, everything,” he decided.

“Don’t thank me,” you smiled.  “Keep paying me, though.”

He laughed a little, glancing away.  “Yeah, and I’ll pay you back for these ropes… sorry."

"No, hey, don't be sorry," you dismissed, getting up off of his leg and standing up to go grab a towel for him.  "I'm just sorry we still haven't found anything strong enough to hold you."

"It's fine, they're strong enough to make me stop myself when I want to do something I shouldn't, that's all that really matters."

You nodded to yourself as you dampened the towel and came back to wipe him off.

"I can do that for myself," he reminded you, sounding a bit embarrassed, but you thought it was sweet. 

“You just focus on getting those ropes off of yourself,” you decided with a little smile.

[missmonsters2]

today I feel awful... idk my insecurities are taking over me and I just want to curl into a ball and cry. maybe it's my hormones maybe the fact that I weighted myself and found out I gained weight (I can't fit into my jeans 😭) and the fact that I saw my sister in a tight skin dress looking perfect while I'm in my pj's just destroyed my confidence. I need something angsty to read to make me forget about my sad, miserable lffe right now. would you be down in writing sth angsty with nat maybe? you don't have to though. it's fine either way. I really appreciate all of your work and I keep reading on repeat whenever I'm feeling down. makes me cheer up. thank you, van ❤️

It's like we're the same person because I also went to visit my sister recently and my sister has gotten her life together and is living her best hot girl bod while I...let's not go there.

I just want you to know that you're hot as fuck and a body is just a body that we can change with time and effort. We're lit rally in this together. This time next year, we will be rocking the body that makes up happy and we'll be healthy!!! 💘💘

But I will still give you nat angst...but with a happy ending bc I said you deserve a HEA!!

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The Withers of Springtime Bloom

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Spring is a time of blooming and when things come back to life. You can't help but notice things that may be causing your relationship with Natasha to wither.

Warnings: self-esteem issues, insecurities about body, relationship with working out and food, seasonal depression. angst with HEA.

Count: 2.1k~

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You're not sure when things changed.

Things change so slowly after all.

Without you noticing, things change and change and change until one day, you do notice.

You notice that Natasha has become quieter, somber.

You notice the lack of date nights and affectionate touches.

You notice that you've let yourself go a little.

You're standing in front of the mirror, staring at your body with a frown. You've gained weight since dating Natasha, but relationship weight gain was normal, wasn't it?

But you remember how Natasha was just as fit as she was before she met you. Sure, she was a superhero, and you were a regular civilian; there was no reason for you to train long hours as Natasha did.

Still...

You turn to the side and peer at yourself in the mirror again.

You can't help but wonder...were you becoming less attractive to her?

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It had been the beginning of fall when you met Natasha. You loved the season of change and when things turned into warm colors before withering away for winter to come.

Natasha had come like a blessing, and in the winter, she was just warm as the colors of fall. Instead of withering away, she bloomed and invested that warmth in your relationship with her.

Despite always being an early riser to work out, weekends were the days she stayed in bed with you just a little longer. There had been so many breakfasts, lunch, and dinner dates. You found yourself moving things around or neglecting to work around her busy schedule.

Perhaps that was when things began to change. Eating out so often and forgoing working out to spend time with Natasha was what led to this.

Spring has arrived, and things are coming back to life. Yet somehow, your relationship with Natasha was withering away.

"Hey," you greet her as you come home, shopping bags in hand. You bought some more clothes when things felt like they didn't fit comfortably anymore. The experience had been upsetting for you, and you didn't end up buying too much, telling yourself you didn't want to spend too much when you were going to lose the weight.

Natasha was working in her office, peering down over reports, and barely acknowledged you other than with a hum.

"Long day?" You ask her as you put your things away and walk over to her.

"Yeah," Natasha sighed. "Trying to get these reports done since Maria needs them tomorrow."

That had been Natasha's excuse for spending long hours in her office every night for the last two weeks.

You place your hand on Natasha's shoulder with a reassuring squeeze, but she leans to the side as if to readjust herself, but still away from your touch.

The sting immediately comes, but you try to push it down, so it doesn't hurt as bad.

"Right," you say hoarsely, but Natasha stares on at the reports. "I'm just going to get ready for bed. It's been a long day and all. Let me know if you need anything."

Natasha gives you a nod as you leave the room. You feel awkward as you lie in the bed you share with her. You wonder if you're taking up too much space.

There's a pang of something as you try to curl yourself to be smaller and only distantly realizing you've skipped dinner before you fall asleep.

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You fall back onto the mat, chest heaving and your lungs burning.

It's been a while since you've worked out, and now you're definitely paying for it with how unfit you are.

The gym is moderately empty with the hour it is. You hate going to a public gym because it always feels like someone is staring, but it's better for strangers to stare than working out at the Compound for people you know to stare at you.

The rational part of you knows that you should just talk to Natasha, but the emotional side of you whispers that you won't like what Natasha has to say, that she might even end it before you've had a chance to change yourself.

When weeks pass, and you weigh yourself again, you almost start crying because you've only lost a couple of pounds.

It's normal, you know it is. You're losing weight at a normal rate, but it's not enough. You know fast weight loss wouldn't make sense for your body but you also feel you don't have half a year to go back to your normal weight.

You sit on the bathroom floor for hours, debating what to do when you hear a quiet knock.

"Sweetheart, are you in there?" Natasha's muffled voice comes through.

You wipe at your eyes furiously as you stand up.

"Y-Yeah," you answer back. "I'm just in the tub soaking."

There's a moment of silence through the door before Natasha answers back, "Alright. Enjoy yourself. Did you want me to order anything specific for dinner?"

"No, it's okay," you tell her. "You order anything you want. I already ate on my way home." You think about the chicken salad you've been eating for the past two weeks and almost sigh.

Natasha answered that she just came back to see if you've eaten, but she actually had to head back to the Compound. You were Natasha shuffling around before leaving through the front door, and you let out the breath you were holding.

You actually take a long, hot shower before putting on sweats and a big hoodie.

The truth was, you were hungry. The chicken salad was okay on the way home, but it had been a couple of hours since.

You knew starving yourself wasn't the answer, so you went into the kitchen to see if you could find something healthy to hold you over until you could go to bed.

But you can't find anything in the fridge except for Natasha's leftovers from whatever she ordered the day before. You can't find anything except frozen pizzas and microwavable foods.

You check the calories on the back and let out a frustrated sigh. Checking your watch, you realize it's too late in the evening to go grocery shopping because, by the time you get there, stores will have closed.

You slump down on the floor, leaning against the cabinets as you let out a pathetic whimper while your eyes became hot with tears.

You miss Natasha. You want Natasha holding you and telling you it would be okay. But you couldn't have that until you were back to what you were when you met her.

The front door suddenly opens.

"Have you seen my—sweetheart?" Natasha started to call before she noticed you sitting on the floor. "What's wrong?"

You use your sleeve to wipe at your eyes as you sit up straight.

"Nothing," you sniffle before you start to stand. "I just stubbed my toe against the edge of the kitchen island. What were you looking for? USB? You left it next to the bedside."

Natasha stares at your back, hair still wet as she takes in your attire.

"It's a little hot to be wearing a hoodie and sweats, isn't it?" Natasha asks softly. "Doesn't seem like you turned on the aircon in here."

You keep walking, but Natasha starts to follow you.

"'m cold," you say quietly so she can't hear the tremble in your voice.

"Are you feeling sick?" Natasha asks with concern as you sit down on the couch, turning on the TV. You pull the blanket over you as if to make your point.

"No," you tell her because you don't want her to worry. "Just cold after a bath."

Natasha sets her things down before she takes a seat next to you. Even in the low lighting, she can see your eyes rimmed red and dampness of them.

You're refusing to look at her as you have your knees drawn up to your chest and stare stubbornly at the TV screen.

Then she hears it.

Your stomach grumbles.

"Are you hungry, sweetheart?" Natasha asks softly again. "We can just order food and stay in tonight."

Your cheeks grow hot. "Don't you have to be at the Compound?"

You don't mean to snap at her, but you can't help but feel embarrassed.

Natasha remains quiet for a moment, quickly thinking over the last few weeks before she feels guilt trickle in.

She doesn't remember the last time she ate with you—doesn't remember the last time she saw you eat.

"Sweetheart," she calls you gently again, and you bristle at the tone. "Is there something wrong?"

The fragile dam you've built to keep the weeks of compiling emotions at bay breaks, and you're hurtling down the stream over the waterfall.

"Are you not in love with me anymore?" You choke out as you begin to cry.

You can't even register to feel horrified at your breakdown because you just need to know.

"I know...I know my body has changed since we first met and I've gained weight but I really am trying to lose it. I just—I feel like you're avoiding me. At first, I thought things at work have been really stressful for you, and I wanted to give you space but you're gone all the time. You're gone even when you're here."

Natasha can barely understand anything you've said after hearing you say the first part. Her breath hitches painfully in the back of her throat, and she legitimately feels appalled at herself.

She starts to say something, but you keep going.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to make this about me because if you're going through something then I want to support and be there for you. But I can't help but feel like you're grossed out by me. I mean—I feel grossed out when I look at myself. I feel like I'm taking up so much space—"

Natasha cuts you off abruptly, pulling off the blanket as she pulls at you until you're in her lap.

"Nat—"

"You're not gross and this is not about the weight you have or have not gained. You hear me?" Natasha says forcefully as she holds you close to her, hand over your thigh to keep you against her.

"God, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry if I've been making you feel like you're not attractive me," Natasha's eyes well up as your tears wet her shoulder. "You're literally still the most gorgeous person I've ever met and you're always going to be that to me."

Natasha's hand at your waist dips underneath your hoodie, her fingers trailing up your back as she sighs at your warmth. "I should've told you, but the springtime is just really hard for me. It's odd because it's a time for things to come back to life but some of the worst things have happened to me during the spring and things blooming makes me think about things that aren't coming back. I think it's also just a little bit of seasonal depression too. I'm just the rare percentage that gets it in the spring."

The explanation makes your body sag with relief because while you feel so horrible that there is a reason Natasha doesn't like spring, she's not falling out of love with you.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize that I was hurting you," Natasha apologizes again. "I didn't mean to be so distant but I didn't want to bring your mood down as well, which is why I've been working so much to keep busy."

"It's okay," you muttered as your turn your head, forehead pressed against her neck. "I'm sorry spring is depressing for you."

Natasha merely hushes you as she kisses the side of your head.

You begin to feel awkward, thinking about how you must be heavy on her and try to move, but Natasha doesn't let you.

"Sweetheart, I don't know how to convince you that you're perfect to me," Natasha says so seriously as she forces you to look at her. "If you want to lose weight because that is what you want, then I support you. But I need you to understand that I love you no matter what. I don't care either way because you're so fucking lovely to me always. Do you understand?"

Timidly, you reply, "Okay. Thank you."

Natasha presses her lips against yours in a long kiss before she pulls back.

"Now, I'm going to ask again. Are you hungry? We can order in and watch that new show on Netflix I heard was pretty good from Wanda."

You feel lighter. You think you might still want to work out because that would make you happy, but you don't feel the rush like you did just a couple of hours ago.

"Yeah," you say shyly. "But maybe something not so heavy?"

Natasha nods as she presses another kiss into your cheek as she helps you settle onto the couch right beside her to grab her phone.

"Anything to make you bloom."

[babyboibucky]

Promises, promises

Pairing: AU!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: You believed that promises are meant to be broken but Bucky always proved you wrong. Until one day, he proved you right.

Word Count: 6,555 (oops I got carried away lol)

Warnings: Angst, a tiny bit of self-doubt but with a happy ending!!!

A/N: Some tags aren’t working, damn u tumblr! Anyway enjoy the angst and the shitty writing lmfao. Also kinda want to do ficlets for these two??? Like short fics about the happenings in their relationship, their first date, how they dealt with the break up idk, lemme know if anyone’s interested in that xoxo

MAIN MASTERLIST

-

It's been four and a half years since Bucky broke up with you and honestly, you're fine now. Fine, as in you've moved on from him and that you haven't been stalking his Instagram account anymore or have been asking Steve how he's doing since the break up. You're fine now, really.

There was not an ounce of denial left in your body after almost two years of pining and self-blame. But that doesn't mean you've forgotten the pain he caused you when he woke up one day and realized that he didn't need you anymore.

Forgive and forget they often told you and you badly wanted to do so. But it wasn't that easy to do, not when you still feel the pain as if it only happened yesterday.

"What did you say?" your forehead creased as you walked around the kitchen counter, quickly approaching Bucky who had his back to you as he stood in the living room of your shared apartment.

You weren't sure if you heard him right, or if he actually said anything. Perhaps you were just hearing things? Just this morning he woke up and greeted you with his charming smile before pressing a soft peck on your lips. You had cooked breakfast together, laughed together and even talked about what to have for dinner.

Sure, something about his demeanor earlier was a bit off, but you assumed it had something to do about his work and not because he wanted to break up with you.

Right?

"Bucky, what did you say?" you pressed when Bucky remained quiet; he didn't even turn around to face you.

He heaved out a deep sigh, "I said I need space." he murmured.

"What do you mean, Buck?" you asked again, voice small and shaky as you fidgeted with the hem of your shirt.

Of course you knew what exactly Bucky meant by that, but you didn't want to believe it. You were hopeful that maybe this was one of those petty fights you used to have, one where Bucky would spend the night over at Steve's. He'll come around the next day, he always does that. You always woke up to him whispering apologies to your ear and you would say your sorry too.

Bucky rubbed his face with his hand before finally turning to you, "I can't do this anymore." he said, shaking his head before averting his gaze to the floor.

He must have seen the look in your eyes when he faced you. As much as you believed that you were pretty good at hiding your emotions, it never worked on Bucky. He was the only person who could always read you; you could never hide from him.

"Bucky, I don't understand." you let out a nervous chuckle as you hugged yourself, biting your lower lip to prevent them from quivering as you held back the urge to cry.

Bucky rubbed the back of his neck, "I just...you've been too...fuck, I don't know how to say this without hurting you. I really don't want to." he admitted dejectedly, looking up at you.

You scoffed, "Just fucking say it, Bucky. I'm already hurt just by having this conversation." you told him.

"You're too good for me. Way too good."

Bucky’s words echoed in your mind again as you laid your eyes on him, four and a half years after your break-up. And just like that, you were back to square one.

You did your best to avoid him after he left, you felt like Bucky too tried to do the same. It was harder than you thought, given that you belonged to the same circle of friends. There were missed birthday parties, anniversaries and get togethers. If you knew Bucky was going to be there, you’d bail. Thank god you had a bunch of understanding friends who never took your absences against you.

But an engagement party between two of your friends? Now that was something you wouldn’t want to miss out on.

You’ve been really happy for quite a while now, to the point that it never crossed your mind that Bucky would surely be attending as well. He had been out of your system since the day you decided to move past him, which is why you thought that you were finally a-okay.

Tonight proved you wrong because as you watched Bucky smile and greet your friends, you realized that you still wanted to punch him and hurt him and tell him that you were still in lo—

“Hi.”

You were too focused on daydreaming about how you wanted to hurt Bucky that you failed to notice that he made his way to you and was now waiting for you to greet him back.

Bucky was smiling at you the same way he did on the night you first met at a college house party. You and Bucky have been together for that long.

“Hi.”

The music was too loud that you missed out on the stranger’s greeting, if not for his shadow looming over your hunched figure as you sat on the staircase, you would’ve completely ignored him.

The guy was looking down at you with a charming smile that made your cheeks turn pink. He was tall and slightly muscular, something you noticed right off the bat all thanks to the tight red henley he was sporting. The guy had long hair too, but it was tied back into a low man bun that was messy enough to leave tendrils of stray hair to frame his handsome face.

“Hi.” He repeated with a chuckle, a hint of amusement laced in his tone as he bit his lip at the sight of you just staring up at him.

“Hi?” You stammered awkwardly.

He laughed, “Um, can I pass through or is there some sort of password required?”

You realized that you had been blocking his way, everyone’s way actually. Quickly, you apologized and stood up to leave your spot only for the guy to block your way before you could even hop off of the last step of the staircase.

Thinking that you must have confused him and the direction you intended to go, you murmured a soft apology again before sidestepping him but to no avail. You looked up at him with a frown when you noticed that he was intentionally blocking your way.

It didn’t help that he was way taller than you. Despite the one being on the last step of the staircase, the guy still loomed over you.

“Excuse me?” You snapped and tried to move past him but he was way bigger than you and managed to stop you from passing through.

He had a cheeky smile on as he watched your futile attempt to squeeze your way out of his large body. You huffed out when he held onto the rail while his other hand on the wall, completely trapping you on the staircase.

“What’s the password?” He asked, still grinning at you.

You deadpanned, “Are you kidding me?”

He shook his head, “Nope.”

You stared at him blankly before glancing at his hands, observing whether you had a chance at prying them away from where they held on. It was then that you noticed how his left hand was covered in tattoos. The sleeve of his henley rode up quite a bit to reveal that his tattoos reached his wrist, he probably had his entire left arm sleeved with ink.

“Can I please pass?” You huffed out when you concluded that there was no way you would be able to escape him.

“Like I said, I need a password.” He insisted.

“Penis.” You stated, face free from any sort of expression.

The guy choked on his laughter, “Why would you honestly think that?” He asked incredulously.

You shrugged, “I thought you guys liked dick jokes.” You reasoned out.

The guy laughed as he shook his head, “Well, you’re not wrong.”

“It’s not the password?” You asked. “Don’t I get a hint or something, I really don’t have time for games right now. I have to go back to my dorm. I have a test tomorrow.” You told the guy.

“I can’t believe you’re thinking about a test. What’s your major anyway?” He asked.

You groaned, “Like I said, I don’t have time for games or even for a conversation. Come on, just let me pass through!”

The guy hummed as he stared at you, as if he was thinking of something. You wanted to look away but he had beautiful ocean blue eyes that you found yourself slowly getting lost in.

“I’ll give you hints.” He announced. “Two hints actually, because I’m feeling generous.”

“Okay, then. Just spit it out!” You rushed.

The guy grinned.

“The password is made up of your name followed by your number.”

“Hi.”

You blinked when Bucky repeated his greeting. When you regained your senses, you cleared your throat and simply nodded at him as acknowledgment. You saw how Bucky’s smile faltered seconds before you looked away and pretended to look for someone.

“I can’t believe you just brushed me off.” He chuckled, running his fingers through his hair.

Bucky had cut off his hair right after graduation. He sported a clean cut since then but now he had longer locks; not as long as his college hair though. It just looked fluffier, you fought the urge to imagine how it’d feel through your fingers.

“I can’t believe you just expected me to greet you as if nothing happened.” You told him, letting your eyes wander around the place.

Bucky exhaled heavily and shook his head, “I thought we’d be okay by now.” He admitted. “Guess I was wrong.”

You clicked your tongue in irritation, snapping your head into his direction after avoiding his gaze earlier. “I am okay, but that doesn’t mean I am okay with being around you.” You hissed.

“I honestly thought we’d still be friends, you know. Civil at least.”

What has gotten into Bucky’s mind for him to expect a lovely reunion between the both of you? Things didn’t end well, he just left. He was too ambitious to even think that you’d greet him with rainbows and butterflies.

“We’re not friends, Bucky. Not even acquaintances.” You told him.

Bucky opened his mouth to say something until someone tapped on the mic, announcing that the newly engaged couple, Wanda and Vis, had something to say to their guests. By the time he looked back at you, you had already walked away and joined Nat at their table.

It reminded Bucky of the days when he used to watch your back retreat into your dorm whenever he walked you home.

“So, you gonna tell me the password or what?”

You felt all your blood rush to your head and you’ve never been thankful for existence of strobe lights. You were probably red as a tomato. Who wouldn’t be anyway? This handsome dude just asked for your name and number!

“Is this a joke?” You managed to asked and thanked the heavens that you didn’t stutter.

The guy shook his head, “I don’t really joke around.” He shrugged.

“Why do you even want to know my name and number?” you curiously asked.

Bucky shrugged, “Been watching you since you arrived.”

“Creeper.” you accused.

“Hard not to when you’re the only grumpy person in a party. I know your friends dragged you here, I mean you said you have a test tomorrow and you don’t seem the type to party a day before. Besides, you’ve been keeping to yourself the entire time. Figured you might want some company, one with substance.” he boastfully wiggled his eyebrows at you.

His confidence appalled you but you were also surprised at how he seemed to have read your mind. Or personality, in general.

“Hey, Bucky!”

You watched the guy turn his head towards front door where a blonde guy— Steve from the student council, you recognized— entered. You thought it’d give you a chance to slip away but the guy, well Bucky, kept his hands in place.

“Kinda busy right now, pal. I’ll catch up with you later.” He said.

Steve’s gaze moved past Bucky until they landed on you. He chuckled as he shook his head at his friend’s antics. Steve walked away but not without acknowledging you.

“He may not seem like it, but Bucky’s a good guy. You can take my word for it.”

Bucky turned to you and lifted an eyebrow, “I mean, coming from a student council member, that’s a pretty credible source.” He said confidently.

You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from smiling. You had to admit, Bucky had a way with words and actions. His boyish charm was working on you and you hated how easily you were falling for it. And you just met the guy like ten minutes ago!

“So, what’s the password?” Bucky asked again.

You tapped your foot as you crossed your arms over your chest, “You promise to let me go if I tell you?”

Bucky made a face, “I don’t think that’s the right term because you can expect more of me once you give me the password. But I’ll definitely step aside. That’s a promise.” He reassured.

“Promises are meant to be broken.” You stated.

“Yeah, well watch me prove you wrong. Password? Pretty please?” He asked cutely and fuck, Bucky was really winning you over just like that.

Letting out a defeated sigh, you tell him your name and number. Just as he promised, Bucky stepped aside and quickly fished out his phone to type in your number. You honestly didn’t expect for him to remember it after hearing it once, but you peeked and he actually did. Impressive.

“Like I promised, off you go to study.” He said and motioned his arm towards the front door.

You sighed and offered a small smile before finally walking past him. You were about to open the front door when Bucky beat you to it.

“I told you ‘let go’ is the wrong term ‘cause I’m walking you home tonight.” Bucky said. “And tomorrow night too. And the next night and the next next night. Or afternoon. Morning? Whatever time your classes finish.”

Bucky really proved you wrong that night because he did walk you home the next night and the next next night too. It went on until he no longer had to watch you enter your dorm or apartment because eventually, the two of you ended up going to the same home.

It’s very ironic really, that it was also Bucky who failed to prove you wrong when he broke his promise not to hurt you, ever. You wondered whether it was your fault that you actually believed in him. It was hard not to though, because Bucky’s earned your trust from all the promises he made and kept.

Which is why it was even more painful when one day, he decided to break the one promise you truly held on to.

“I’ll always love you, you know that right?”

Bucky blurted it out randomly that his statement confused the hell out of you. The two of you were just playing a video game when he said it, making you hit pause.

“And where did that come from?” You asked with amusement.

Bucky frowned, “You could’ve reacted differently. I was hoping for a high-pitched ‘awwww!’ and this is what I get?” He teased, taking your chin in between his index finger and thumb to pull you close so he could bite your nose playfully.

“You said it out of the blue!” You told him with a laugh. “But it made me happy though.” You admitted and kissed his cheek.

“Yeah, well it’s true. I mean, this thing we got? It’s forever.” Bucky said and lovingly smiled at you.

You pretended to gag at his words but it was obvious that you felt like you were on cloud nine when Bucky said that. “Cheeseballs!” You teased.

“This cheeseball’s gonna put a ring on that finger one day. That’s a promise!”

A finger snapped right in front of your face, “You good?” Nat asked.

You nodded and tried your hardest not to look at Bucky. He was seated with Steve, Sam and some other guys at the table next to yours. You could feel him staring at you and it was making you anxious.  Nat and Sharon exchanged looks before letting out a sigh in unison.

“Come on, I’m fine. Stop looking at me like that!” You told them with a forced chuckle.

“What did Bucky say?” Sharon asked. She’d seen Bucky approach you upon his arrival, saw the expressions you both had as you talked and knew immediately that it didn’t go well.

Nat hummed before taking a quick sip from her glass of wine, “We’ve been watching and we’re curious.”

“He was expecting for us to be friends.” You simply stated.

Nat and Sharon groaned and rolled their eyes, “What a dick.” Nat said.

“Men really do have the audacity.” Sharon laughed and shook her head.

You joined her laughter and lifted up your own glass of wine, “I’ll drink to that.” You said before finishing your drink in one go.

One glass of wine turned into two and then three and then four. Six drinks later and you were buzzed and unstoppable. You weren’t that drunk, you were good at handling alcohol but you were tipsy for sure. The formalities of the engagement party were finally done and the guests were left to mingle around.

Wanda and Vis immediately went to your table to catch up and after giving them your heartfelt congratulations (and apologies for missing out on plenty of events), you decided to step out of the venue to get some fresh air.

The silence allowed you to process your thoughts, the same thoughts you had repressed for years. You were happy for Wanda and Vis, truly. The two have been the epitome of soulmates and it was only right for them to end up tying the knot. But you also couldn’t help but wonder, would you and Bucky end up in marriage too had he decided to stay and work things out with you?

You lift up your left hand and stared at your bare ring finger. Just a few years ago, you’d been wearing a simple gold band studded with tiny diamonds around it— a promise ring. Bucky had given it as a gift on your 6th anniversary. You’d gotten together when you were just 19 and Bucky 21. People always doubted that your relationship with him wouldn’t last long given that the two of you were so different. Not to mention, Bucky had a reputation. Girls fawned over him; he was tall and handsome, had a rugged appeal to him thanks to his long hair and tattooed left arm. He drove a damn motorcycle that got him into trouble plenty of times.

You were Miss Goody Two Shoes who played it safe and Bucky was the Big Bad Wolf who liked taking risks.

It was a surprise when your relationship with him kept on progressing and the next thing you knew, the both of you have been together for a total of eight long years. It would’ve reached nine but shit happened and Bucky decided that those eight years didn’t matter to him anymore.

“Can we talk?”

If Bucky asked you that a couple of years ago, you would’ve probably punched him in the face and kneed him at the crotch before running away. Well, you still wanted to do so but a part of you wanted to talk things out. Get a proper closure maybe since Bucky failed to give you a detailed explanation that would help you understand why he chose to leave you.

Nat told you once that some things are better left unsaid. You spent years secretly pining for Bucky after the break up, spent nights questioning yourself where you lacked that made him leave you. You’d asked Steve about Bucky whether he met someone knew or how he was dealing with the break up; it did you more damage than good until you finally gave up and decided to actually move on.

But now that Bucky was here and there was no way to avoid him, maybe you deserved this confrontation after all.

“What do you want to talk about?” You asked, keeping your eyes on the pavement right in front of you.

You felt Bucky stand beside you, placing his hands inside the pockets of his jeans before turning to you, “About us.”

You snickered, “Us? What about us? What is there to talk about us?” You asked, turning your head to face him.

Bucky’s eyes have always been your favorite feature of his. They were very expressive and if Bucky could see through you every damn time, it was his eyes that you could always read. They were still blue but they held a certain emotion in them as he gazed at you.

Sadness and...regret?

Before your assumptions could get the best of you, you turned away and waited for Bucky to speak again.

“I can’t keep on avoiding you.” He said. “I’ve been doing so for the past few years and it kills me.” He admitted.

“And you think I want to keep doing this too? I’ve missed out on so many occasions because I just couldn’t be around you. You’re not the only one struggling.” You said.

Bucky shrugged, “Then let’s stop avoiding each other.”

The way he suggested it almost offended you; he was so nonchalant about it as if it was so easy to just let him waltz back into your life. Truth was, you dreamt of the day that he’d come crawling back to you. But you knew better than to let your walls down just because you miss him.

“When Steve told me that you seemed to be doing well, I really thought it meant that we can become friendly with each other, y’now. I mean, eight years. Those years meant so much to me, we’ve been through a lot and—“

“Are you fucking kidding me right now, Barnes?!” You bitterly chuckled.

“If those eight years together really meant a lot to you, you would’ve stayed. You would’ve allowed me to work it out with you! But what, you broke up with me because you thought I was too good for you? That you felt suffocated just because I was looking out for you?”

You didn’t mean to snap at Bucky like that, in your mind you thought you would be able to have a calm conversation with him. But with the alcohol running through your body, you couldn’t stop yourself from expressing yourself and and feeling the same way you did on that specific night.

“Too good? How am I too good for you, Buck?” You asked, immediately wiping off the tears that escaped your eyes.

“You have everything planned out! For yourself, for us. And it makes me feel fucking useless! I see you work your way up at your job and I’m still figuring out what the hell I want to do with my life!” He exclaimed.

You shook your head, “I didn’t know you felt that way.” You whispered. “If you told me this then I could’ve done something about it, Buck! Rather than let it get this far, I would’ve fixed it.” You told him and tried to reach out but Bucky took a step back.

“That too! You’re a fixer! You always end up fixing things. This relationship has become an endless cycle of me fucking up things and you picking up the pieces. And every single time you clean my mess, I feel like you’re hoping I’d be like the others. It’s like you’re trying to make me into a person I’m not just so I could fit this, this certain mold you had in mind!” He accused you.

You wiped again your tears and refused to believe him, “That’s not true, Bucky! I’ve always loved you for who you are, I never asked you to change for me!”

“Yes, you do! You never said it but I always felt it...when Steve got promoted and when Sam finally launched his business. You always wanted me to be like them, you never said it out loud but that’s what you made me feel whenever we talk about my job...or lack thereof.” He chuckled bitterly.

Bucky may not be traditional in the sense that he considered himself an artist. He never liked the idea of settling for a nine to five desk job so he took on a job as a tattoo artist. It wasn’t a permanent job and he didn’t have clients demanding for him all the time so it gave him time to work for a motorcycle shop too.

It was never a problem for you but practically speaking, your and Bucky’s joint savings wouldn’t be enough for the future that the both of you have planned out.

“I’ve been supportive of you! I never asked you to give up on those jobs, Bucky.” You defended yourself.

Bucky nodded his head, “You don’t know it but you do. That’s how I felt whenever you suggested that I try something else.”

“It’s because I know you can do so much more! Stay at the tattoo parlor and mechanic shop, then fine! But don’t settle because you have the potential to make it out there, that’s what I want you to know! I don’t understand why you’re limiting yourself, Buck. Why you’re suddenly so afraid.”

You carefully took a step closer to Bucky and thank god he let you this time. You swallowed the lump in your throat and reached out to cup his face in your hand. Bucky was livid, his chest rising heavily with every breath he took.

“You were the one who taught me to be brave, to take risks. I used to be so afraid, remember? Afraid to ride your motorcycle, to try out that job I thought I couldn’t handle. I was so scared to commit,” you chuckled, remembering how much you hesitated to give Bucky a chance when he asked you to be officially his girlfriend.

“...but you’ve always been there for me. And I want to do the same with you. I know that it seems scary to let go of what you believe is your calling. You don’t have to let go of it, Buck. But you gotta try something new too.” You said as you let your thumb caress the skin beneath his eyes.

There was silence between the two of you. Bucky had calmed down and you thought that it was over. Little did you know that it was simply the calm before the storm. Because the words that came out of Bucky’s mouth were the words you didn’t expect to hear.

“Well, this is me trying something new.”

Bucky refused to meet your gaze and simply let your hand move away from his face. You shook your head no as you turned around to compose yourself.

“We were fine this morning, Buck. What happened?” You asked and embraced yourself, seeking comfort you knew you’d only get if Bucky changed his mind.

“I thought we were fine too. But the tattoo parlor is closing in a month and we haven’t been getting plenty of clients at the motorcycle shop. And it just hit me y’now, I dread coming home to you because I know you’d be disappointed and that again, you’d offer to fix my shit and the thing is, I don’t want you to. I don’t want you to fix my shit or tell me how to deal with my problems! I woke up and realized that I just don’t...” Bucky paused when you swiftly turned around with a frown, eyes brimming with a fresh new wave of tears.

“Don’t say it, Bucky. I’ll be better, I promise! I won’t nag you or pressure you into anything. Just please, don’t say it. Please don’t. We can still work this out.” You begged Bucky.

You weren’t sure you could take it, what he wanted to say. You already knew what he was going to tell you, you didn’t want to hear it. Let other people say it but god, it’d break you if you heard it from him.

“I’m sorry but I don’t need you anymore.”

The stabbing pain in your heart felt so familiar, the kind that punched all the air out of your lungs. You thought you were done crying over Bucky, but you were so wrong.

“I fucked up.” Bucky huffed out, bowing his head as if ashamed.

“You realized that just now?” You snickered. “Do you know how long it took for me to get over you? To forget the pain from hearing you tell me that you don’t need me anymore? After eight years together, Buck. You were my first everything and you gave up on us. And you really expected us to be friends, just like that?!” You spat.

“I’m sorry!” Bucky exclaimed, lifting his head to look up at you and you were surprised that his eyes were glazed with tears.

“I was wrong, I was so fucking wrong. Because you were right, I shouldn’t have settled then. But god I was an idiot, an insecure idiot.” He admitted.

“I was so used to being the one who guided you that it fucking hurt my ego when I noticed that you were becoming your own person outside of our relationship. I was supposed to be the one supporting you, pushing you to be better. You ended being the one leading me. I let my ego get the best of me and thought I’d be better off without you. But it was the biggest mistake of my life because when I left, I felt even more lost.” Bucky explained.

You were left speechless, you weren’t sure why Bucky was telling you all this. Did he want you back or was he simply apologizing? You didn’t have words so you remained quiet and waited to see whether Bucky had more to say.

“I’m so sorry, I really am. I hurt you. I should’ve stayed, should’ve worked with you to fix our relationship. I hate what we’ve become, I sincerely wanted us to be civil with each other at least.” He said.

“Bucky, you’ve been saying the same thing over and over again. I’m not sure you understand the situation. I can’t be friends with you. Not after what happened. I thought I was fine but now I realized that I’ve never really moved on from the pain you caused me.” You told him and sniffed, looking back to check whether your friends could see you.

Thankfully, all the guests were still busy mingling with each other. It’s as if the universe meant for this confrontation to happen. But now you weren’t sure what to do after you finally got a clear explanation from Bucky.

“I wanted a fresh start with you.” Bucky said. “Thought that it would make it easier for me to win you over if we were friends again.”

You scoffed in disbelief, “It’s not that easy, Buck. I can’t just let you walk back into my life after your apology. It doesn’t work that way.”

You tried to move past him but he immediately blocked your way, “When I said I’ll always love you, I meant it. I still do. I want to make things right, please. Give me one last chance to fix this.”

Maybe it was the alcohol in your system, maybe it was Bucky’s words and how sincere he sounded that made your head spin. Your heart was racing and your palms turned cold. You wanted him back too, so bad but you weren’t sure if it was a good idea. He broke your heart and your trust, you weren’t sure if you’d survive if he left you again.

“I can’t continue this conversation, Bucky. I have to go.” You told him and made your way towards the door to the venue.

However, Bucky was quick to stand in front of the door. He had a determined look on his face, one that looked extremely familiar. You were still hurt but couldn’t deny the fact that you too, still love him.

Even after everything that had happened, Bucky still owned your heart.

“Bucky, can you please move? I want to go home.” You said and tried to reach for the door knob but Bucky moved and leaned against the door.

“You need a password to get through.”

You rolled your eyes, “We’re way too old for this, Bucky. I’m not playing with you.”

He shook his head, “I’m not playing either. Give me the password or else we’d be here the entire night.”

You huffed out, “This isn’t funny. Let me through.”

Bucky shrugged, “No can do. Like I said, I can do this all night.”

You deadpanned, “What’s the hint?” You asked with a defeated sigh, knowing well enough that there was no way you could walk past him without playing along with his stupid little game.

“Consists of three words.” Bucky said.

“Penis boobs vagina.”

Bucky cackled, “And I thought you said we’re too old for this.”

You groaned, “I’m serious, Bucky. Just let me go.”

“No. I made that mistake once and I’m not doing that again. I love you. And I promise that this time, it’ll be different. I know you still love me too, so again I am asking you to take a risk and say it.”

Bucky said it with conviction and you hated how it made your stomach flip. Up until this day, Bucky had a way to make you fold. And he could still read you.

“I’m not saying it, Bucky. How sure are you that I still feel the same anyway?” you asked.

Bucky tipped his head towards your neck, “Not sure if you just forgot but you’re wearing the promise ring as a necklace.”

Fuck. Of course, you’d forgotten about it. You may not have been wearing it on your finger, but you still continued to wear it. It meant a lot to you even after the break up, so much so that you couldn’t simply throw it away or remove it. You figured that it might be better to keep it around your neck. Out of sight, out of mind but still there. You wanted it to exist, it was a part of you.

“Say it and I promise that you won’t regret it.” Bucky insisted.

“Promises are meant to be broken. You proved that the night you broke up with me.” Your voice quivered when you said that.

“And I want to make it up for it for the rest of my life.” He reassured.

“History repeats itself. I don’t think I can deal with it again if you realized the second time around that you don’t need me. Buck, you really hurt me.” You said, voice cracking before you could even finish your sentence.

Bucky quickly took your face in between his hands and for some reason, it felt right. The warmth of his palm, the love in his eyes as he gazed at you, it felt like home.

“I know and I hate myself for it. So fucking much. But I promise you, it wouldn’t happen again. I fixed my life when you left, realized that you were right. I’m better now. So let me be the fixer this time, let me be the one to fix this mess, to pick up the pieces. Because I’m just as afraid to let you go again. I can’t do that again. I love you and I need you. I always did.”

The kiss he pressed on your forehead caused your walls to crumble down. All of a sudden you were sobbing into his arms and apologizing.

“I didn’t mean to pressure you then, Buck. I didn’t know, I’m sorry too.” You cried.

“Shh, no. Please don’t apologize.” Bucky coaxed as he pulled back to kiss your tears away. “None of this was your fault, baby. It’s all on me. Let me make it up to you, please?”

The term of endearment made your heart flutter and as much as you hated how Bucky easily won you over, again, the love you have for him was quick to outweigh it. You knew you shouldn’t have given in to him just like that, but this was Bucky. He was your greatest love, someone who owned your heart even after he left.

“I miss you, baby. Couldn’t fathom the thought of you being with someone else.” Bucky admitted as he hugged you tightly.

“I was so stupid, so fucking stupid. I hated myself for hurting you. I won’t do it again, I swear.”

His hand rubbed circles against your back, helping you calm down after your breakdown. He swayed you from side to side, pressed kisses on your crown and whispered promises that he was sure he was going to keep and you basked in it. When you finally calmed down, you pressed your face into Bucky’s neck and inhaled his scent.

He smelled the same, like comfort and love and trust. You hugged him tighter and smiled into his skin and mumbled, “I love you.”

Bucky chuckled, “You got the password right but I don’t think I’m letting you go just yet.”

“Nat and Sharon’s gonna kick our asses if they find out.” You chuckled.

He pulled back and stared at you lovingly, “I’ll take the hit for you.” he laughed.

“I’m sorry.” he mumbled again, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“Forgiven.” You told him and stood on your tiptoes until Bucky bent down to meet your lips in a kiss.

You sighed into the kiss. Four and a half years of pain and anger all gone and replaced with the love you always had for Bucky. His lips against yours made you dizzy but in a good way.

It felt right, like this was how things were really supposed to be.

You pulled back and sighed, “As much as I want to stay like this, I’m really tired.”

Bucky let you go but took your hand in his, intertwining his fingers with yours. “I’m driving you home tonight.” He said.

You smiled.

“And the next night. And the next next night.”

Yet again, Bucky proved himself to be worthy of another chance. Because he drove you home the next night, and the next next night. It went on until he regained your trust back and all was well enough for him to finally reveal the black velvet box that he had been keeping in his pocket since the night of your eventful reunion.

“You need a password to see what’s inside.” Bucky grinned up at you as he bent down on one knee.

You chuckled through your years, “Any hint?”

“One word, three letters.”

You wiped away your tears with a smile followed by a subtle nod.

“Yes.”

Bucky kept his promise all along, he really did put a ring on your finger. Took quite a while with plenty of obstacles that caused its delay, but a promise fulfilled nonetheless.

-

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[seriouslysnape]

To the Limit

__

Severus Snape x Fem. Reader

Warnings: Slight smut. Use of safeword. Language.

Request: Hi! Can u make Severus × Reader when the reader use the safe words for the first time because idk maybe it's too much for the reader that day or smth else you like..Thankyouu 💕💕 love ur writings btw ❤❤

A/N: Here we gooooooo. Reminder, everything is consensual.

Word Count: 2,947

“Okay, darling. Whatever you want.”

__

Severus has always been flexible in the bedroom. Yes, Severus Snape is versatile in the sheets and has more love making skills than you originally would’ve given him credit for. Sex with Severus can range anywhere from slow and careful where praising your body is his main objective, to fucking you so mercilessly that stars are dotting the back of your eyelids with each hard thrust.

Sometimes, you don’t have to establish what kind of theme your sessions will take on. If Severus comes home angry from a long, obnoxious day then you very well know that a rough fucking will get it out of his system. When you’ve just watched one of your favorite romantic drama Muggle movies that have sent you into tears, he knows that something more unhurried is in order so you are reminded of how much he loves you.

Other times though, there isn’t really anything that determines the kind of sex you’ll be having. If the mood is right for both of you, then you often will just figure it out from there. 

Severus’ return on Friday night from a long week of classes was coated with his desire for you. You could practically feel the hard sexual tension radiating off of his whole being. From the moment he walked in the door, you knew what tonight would hold for the both of you. More than likely, it’d be a whole lot of rutted fucking and orgasms until neither of you had any stamina left to give. Normally, a seed of excitement would be planted and begin to grow in your core at the thought of being touched by him, but you didn’t feel it this time. 

It had been a bad week to put it simply. Work was weighing you down and you had taken more hits than you were used to in a five day time period. Exhaustion had riddled you, and stress has gotten the best of you. Emotional breakdown was the only way you could describe how you were feeling. You really weren’t feeling up to what Severus wanted to do. However, you couldn’t bring yourself to deny him when his hands and lips were on you, moving to all his favorite places on you.

His voice was silky smooth in your ears as he uplifted you with how he had been thinking about you all day, and how he wanted to be with you when you weren’t around. It wasn’t Severus’ fault that you had a bad week, and it surely wasn’t all his fault that he was this turned on. The way he gripped your legs with his strong hands was an indicator that he wanted to go well into the night, which your tired state wasn’t a fan of. But you loved Severus, and you always wanted him to be happy and well pleased. So you figured you could handle a couple of coarse rounds to satisfy him.

Oh, how wrong you were.

Once access was granted, Severus leapt onto you without hesitation. A tornado of clothes being removed whirled around the room, your shirt and pants ended up on complete opposite sides of the room. Hot and unruly kisses were shared, marks were left on your necks, and no part of you went unattended. 

Admittedly, the first orgasm was actually enjoyable. Severus’ fingers were knuckle deep in your needy cunt and pumping vigorously as he found all the best spots. The strenuous activity melted some of the week’s stress from your conscience, your mind being stripped of all your worry as it clouded with ecstasy. Severus thrived off of the moans and noises of delight that he was drawing out of your throat, perfecting his movements to give you an even stronger release. Severus worked you to your finish as you came around his fingers, slicking them with arousal and relief. 

He left lazy kisses over your breasts while you took a moment to recover, preparing yourself for the next round that was undoubtedly on its way. Tiredness had plagued you long before Severus had even walked through the door, and you had suddenly been robbed of even more energy, so you were confident that you might not get a proper orgasm this second time. But the moment Severus slid you onto his dick and stretched your walls the way only he knew how to, you knew that you were going to cum whether you felt like you could handle it or not.

It wasn’t that you didn’t want to. You loved seeing Severus so enraptured in waves of pleasure and gratification, but you were beyond fatigued. Still, you bounced up and down on his lap over and over again, your already sensitive clit throbbing with each rub of his fingers. Severus’ other hand guided your hip movements to meet the way he thrusted up into you, hitting your g-spot just right.

When you came this time, your sound of release was more of a strained cry than a content sound. Severus didn’t seem to notice, since he was too focused on the intoxicating feeling of filling you with his own finish. You popped off of him before he was even emptied out, the rest of his fluids landing on your inner thighs. You fell onto the bed next to him, your breathing much heavier than usual. 

You were totally tuckered out with absolutely no hope of another round. Your muscles ached and your bones were wiped out. Although, you felt a queasy feeling of despair when you saw that familiar look of lust in Severus’ eyes. He spoke lowly, his voice echoing in your ringing ears.

“I’m not through with you yet, love.” He purred.

Usually that would’ve sent a whole mess of arousal through you, but you were too worn out. But Severus usually didn’t last more than three rounds, so this would for sure be the last one. You thought you could push through so he could at least get his release, but this third go round wasn’t a good feeling for you at all.

With your arms above your head and the pillowcase below your head in your fingers’ death grip, you turned your head to the side to fight through his persistent hard fucking into you. On a better day, you’d be all over this and relishing every moment. But now your eyes were screwed tightly shut in discomfort, for each time you opened them Severus would only be able to see the whites of your eyes. The thumping heartbeat in your ears was deafening and your entire body was stiff and rigid, but not in a good way. You wanted to tough it out so at least Severus could finish, but it was just too much for you tonight. 

You had to tap out.

“Polyjuice!” You squeaked out, your voice raspy.

In an instant, you saw any expression of lust wiped straight from his face. He pulled out the millisecond that the word registered in his head, his face stricken with worry and concern at the first time use of your agreed safe word. Severus’ heart dropped at your whimpers of displeasure, his brain reeling and raking over what had gone wrong. 

“[Y/N], what’s wrong? What happened?” He asked frantically.

“I-I just...”

Shaky breaths and uncomfortable whines were the only noises you could seem to make. You sat up from where you were laying down, bringing your knees to your chest and hiding your face as you began to cry. Your emotions were all over the place, and it didn’t help that you were overstimulated and overworked. Severus went to pull you to him, but withdrew his hand. Upsetting you further would absolutely crush him, but he needed to know that you were okay.

“Can I touch you, darling?” He whispered out.

The yowl of approval was enough for him to feel fine with carefully wrapping his hand under your arm and dragging you across the mattress to where he was kneeling on the middle of the bed. He pulled the covers over your skin to keep you from getting cold from the loss of heat from being active. You buried your head into his bare chest, your tears leaking and falling down his skin. 

“I’m sorry, Sev. I’m really sorry.” You sobbed, your hair sticking to your sweaty skin.

“No, no, no. Don’t ever be sorry for telling me to stop when you’re not comfortable,” He reassured; “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” 

The shake of your head brought relief upon him, but he was still worried. He rocked you in his arms until your sobs died down enough to where you were coherent. Severus was getting ready to ask you once more what was wrong, shifting you so he could see your face. When moving you, his hand accidentally brushed against your swollen, sensitive clit and you wailed out pathetically. Severus’ pale face went even whiter.

“Oh, my love...I worked you too hard, didn’t I?” He queried.

Severus would always admit that sometimes he’d get into the zone and completely drown everything else out. He wouldn’t really be able to tell how hard he was pulling in and out. It was rare, but from time to time you’d have to ask him to soften his thrusts or slow his pace when he got too rowdy. But you had never asked him to stop completely until now. He feared that he had seriously pushed you over the edge this time.

“It’s not just that.” You confessed with a sniff.

Severus had drawn your head back to gaze into your bleary eyes. The tear tracks being swiped away with his thumbs as he cradled your face. 

“What is it then, sweetheart?” He asked with wonder.

A fresh set of salty tears pooled and fell down your cheeks, but for a different reason.

“I’ve had a horrible week. Nothing has gone right,” You explained croakily; “I wanted to make you feel good and I thought it might make me feel better...but I’m just exhausted and I couldn’t handle it tonight.”

You fell apart into another set of choking sobs and gut wrenching cries, prompting Severus to bring you back into his chest. He stroked your skin and left kisses so light that they were ghostly. 

“It’s alright, angel. I wish you had told me before that you weren’t feeling up to it,” He consoled; “You’re worth so much more than sex. I want you to tell me sooner next time if you’re uncomfortable.”

Your nod of understanding offered a wash of comfort over him that you were calming down steadily. He hated that this happened. He knew that was the whole reason for your established safe word for when things went south or things got dicey. He just never thought you’d ever have to use it. He felt absolutely terrible. 

“I’m sorry, Sevvy. I really wanted you to get off, I just-”

“Please don’t apologize for this. This is my fault. I should’ve seen how tired you were and how I was being overly hard,” He said; “I’m the one that should be sorry.”

The sniffles from your nose had increased as you tried to flush down all the drainage from your crying. Your tears had stopped as you sat up from his body, wiping at your cheeks with the back of your hand. The red blotches in your puffy eyes were pinging at Severus’ already guilty conscience. He saw the littered hickeys across your neck and breasts, and how your lips were swollen from his severe kisses. He had rocked your burnt out body to the max.

“I’ll tell you what. How about we go get cleaned up, and then we can get into bed. Then you can tell me about your week if so wish.” He suggested, cautiously guiding you off of the bed.

“I think I just want to get a bath and get some sleep.” You said, barely able to stand on your wobbly legs.

“Okay, darling. Whatever you want.” He smiled softly, hoping it’d offer you some kind of solace. 

Severus ran you a hot bath, filling it with all of your favorite scents and smells. Your stance was still despite your shaking legs, and you seemed to be staring off into an endless trance. You slipped into the tub when it was ready, sinking down just below your nose under the bubbles. Normally, Severus would be sitting across from you or you’d be snuggled up on his lap, but he wanted you to have some space for a bit. You were honestly too tired to object. 

He simply casted a charm to freshen himself up, finding and selecting his favorite pair of sweatpants and soft shirt for you to change into. Your eyes were closed, and you had just begun to drift off to sleep when he re-entered the bathroom, changed into some casual day time wear, despite how late it was.

“Here are some clean clothes for you, pretty girl.” He remarked, setting the folded sweats and shirt on the end of the tub for you to get when you got out.

You only gave a light nod as a response, your eyes following him as he stood awkwardly. He was unsure of what to do for you now. He thought that you might want the bedroom to yourself for the night, which was fine because he wouldn’t be able to sleep knowing he had pushed you so hard anyway. He placed himself on the floor by the tub, sitting with his legs criss crossed over one another. It was quiet in the room, the only sounds were the occasional gentle splash when you moved your leg or arm. His eyes were still full of worry, and he was kicking himself big time now.

“I’m so sorry...” He breathed out, running his fingertips dragging leisurely your damp arm that you had resting on the ledge of the bathtub; “I never meant to hurt you.”

“You didn’t hurt me, Sev. I promise.” You responded, wishing he wouldn’t take this so hard.

When it came to you, Severus took everything to heart. There weren’t many things in the world that made his heart beat with a purpose. You were the single person that allowed him to want to get up in the mornings. The thought of hurting you was enough to break him down. If he could have it his way, you would be indescribably happy with every passing moment of every day. He never wanted you to feel anything other than joy. 

But he knew that life would never allow it.

Your eyebrows dipped when you noticed his attire, wondering why he wasn’t in his own sleepwear. It was much too late for him to go anywhere.

“Where are you going?” You questioned, your voice thick with weary.

“I’m going to go back to the school. I have some grading to do.” He half-lied.

It was true that he did indeed have a stack of papers to be assessed, but that wasn’t the real reason why he felt like he wanted to leave. Severus Snape grading on a Friday night when he had the opportunity to be cuddled up with his lover? He’d choose you every time.

Now you felt bad for causing him to scurry off. You wanted him there with you regardless of what had happened.

“Severus,” You called out tenderly, reaching for his face; “I don’t want you to leave.” 

A genuine look of doubt flashed over his features as his head lulled into your hand.

“I think it would be best if you got some good sleep tonight. I’ll just be in my office so if-”

“Stay with me. Please?” You requested, the thought of sleeping without him was disheartening.

A sigh of awe expelled from his chest. He couldn’t say no to your puppy eyes and slightly pouting lower lip.

“Okay, okay.” He agreed.

“I think that some boyfriend snuggles will make me feel a whole lot better.” You spoke rather cheekily.

He hummed affirmatively. The sound of nestling up with you was impossible to turn down. He took your hand from his face and kissed your palm gingerly, holding the warm skin to his lips for a brief moment. He eventually stood from the floor, but stopped when you held your arms up.

“Help me up?” You asked with the first genuine smile of the evening.

He chuckled, obliging and lifting you effortlessly from the tub. The warm towel was heavenly as you dried off, changing into the clothes that Severus had left for you. Severus went and changed as well, laughing to himself when he exited the closet to see you already curled up. 

The sheets draped over him easily when he laid next to you, waiting for you to nuzzle up to him. He held you close and flush to him, thanking his lucky stars that you were okay.

“My sweet girl...” He hushed out, noting that you were just seconds away from falling asleep; “I love you.” 

You mumbled out a sleepy “I love you” in return before drifting into a deep slumber to snooze off the night’s drama. Severus, as expected, didn’t sleep much that night to ensure that you were sleeping soundly and comfortably. He still felt dreadful, even after you had told him over and over that he didn’t hurt you. The weekend to follow was filled with Severus doting and cherishing over you every chance that he had, trying to make up for what had happened. You were the light of his life after all.

And he prayed that he’d never see that flame go out.