#idk the exact time of it lol so im just guessing rn

[pumakaji64]

I think the one thing I'll miss about my tits is that I won't be able to refer to myself as a big titty boyfriend in my own head anymore... other then that I'm ready to get these bitches blown clean off lol

[spikeyjo]

also uh im kind of not thinking about it much because its insane. but if everything goes right (and i mean a considerable amount of things that probably wont go as planned) but if they DO... i will have a major surgery in like two weeks

[tortilla-of-courage]

Do you have any Tri headcanons you would like to share 👁️👁️

i haven't had time to like, think of anything suuuper complex lol so more than headcanons these are me poking at their character i think?

for starters i have like, NO clue if tri gets Gendered™ properly in the English version of the game, but in the latam spanish version tri felt soooo genderless/gender neutral i cannot help but they/them at least and avoid using pronouns at most lol. like i think if they do use pronouns it's more in a "well if it's easier for you! idk what a pro noun is though. is that a different kind of echo i dont know about????"

on that note. yknow how in that one post i made the very first day i compared tri to fi briefly? holy SHIT dude. the entire game i felt that exact same brand of affection develop for them. like they're not identical and their behaviors come from different places but both learning about human emotions through observation is so nice to see. like their arcs seem very similar, just tri's are Way more in the open/through mandatory story segments whereas fi's was more subtle and mostly in optional dialogues

also i Love how tri like. behaves in general. the way they correct people when they get called a floating ball. "no im tri!!!". the way they circle around people trying to gauge of they can be seen. they're so silly and genuine with their reactions

i guess one headcanon is that i imagine they sound like a muffled windchime. like in general but ESPECIALLY when moving. very soft noises but still bell- or glass-like in nature

cant think of much else rn but i like tri a lot :)

[raysletters]

get to know your fanfic writer!

i have to be honest, the lovelies @14carrotghoul and @suseagull04 tagged me for this like a week ago and i have incredibly bad memory, but here i am anyway (thanks for the tag and sorry for being late lol 💀)

when did you post your first ever fanfic?

oh my god,,,,,, i think it was 2015(??

first character(s) you wrote for:

before i say this, i need to explain i was a child with a very early access to internet. also, i am, as a great mind said once, a pathological people pleaser, and my sister was a directioner,,,,,,,,, so yes ofc i wrote a fanfic about harry styles for my sister, even though i never published it, and it was just a dumb y/n story,,,,,,,, (this was like 2012). though, since harry styles is a real person and not a character like my 9yo self thought, then i assume the next one would be,,,,, damon salvatore (it was posted on wattpad and absolutely horrible, i had an hyperfixation and created an oc and everything)

main character(s) you’re currently writing for:

alex claremont-díaz, henry fox-mountchristen-windsor, beatrice fox-mountchristen-windsor, june claremont-díaz, nora holleran, and percy "pez" okonjo have all had their points of view written or worked on at some point on my docs. between that and them seeing the light of day is another thing.

character(s) you haven’t written about before but plan on writing about soon:

i- i guess, since they haven't been posted yet, bea, nora and pez will get their time to shine (soon, hopefully) on my next fics. ive also been trying to write a bit of catherine for the diabetic!henry au,,,,, but its been really hard bc its all just too close to home.

fandom(s) you’re currently writing for:

red, white & royal blue

platonic pairing(s) you currently write for:

at this moment im obsessed with writing alex interacting with both bea and pez, bc we didnt get enough of that on the book and fics always show june being besties with henry and i kinda wanted to pull an uno reverse on that trope. also, im really interested in writing some henry and nora, bc they're besties on the book that gossip about drag race and stuff,,,,, but i want to maybe dive into it a bit deeper.

romantic pairing(s) you currently write for:

firstprince and junopez, and ive already have two wips where i give bea a girlfriend,,,,,, so theres that

your top 3 tags on AO3 (if you post your works on AO3):

i literally went to my dashboard to look it up, the first one is my different alterations of the tag "not beta read", but we're not going to count that one. next we have (surprisingly to no one) "angst", "mental health issues" 💀💀, and lastly "songfic" jskssjsksjsksjsksjskswjsksjsksjsks

your current platform where you post your works:

you can find me on ao3 as raysletters

snippet of the wip you’re currently working on:

i am working on SO many wips rn bc ive been sick and that has meant being in bed and not doing shit most of the day bc it hurts to breathe sjsksjsksjsksjskssjsksjkssjsksjsjsjajkssj

here, i give yall a snippet of the musician!alex au yall saw on the wip title game (that can be alternatively called "fulfilling most of smut saturday prompts in one single fic bc i wanted to try writing smut and it quickly got out of my hands")

so, idk if this would be nsfw bc it is not the smut itself, but more like smut-adjacent narration, but still putting the break so y'all can decide if you want to read it or not

This exact moment, though? It might not only embarrass him in a very public setting, but might also make him combust and collapse from sheer lust.

The entire place is crowded to the point of asphyxiation, the fans are spinning at their limit speed on the ceiling, and Henry feels like this is probably how hell feels.

That is, if hell ever had the pleasure of getting Alexander Claremont-Díaz on his knees, making the most obscene and erotic guitar solo known to mankind, thrusting his hips to the rhythm of She by Harry Styles on his guitar while the lights focus on him; his open white shirt shows the chain he now knows contains the key to his family's home at Texas, his glistening chest and the sweat that rolls over his collarbones, his pectorals, his abdomen and then disappear on his navel behind the guitar. It makes Henry reminisce of that first video he ever saw of Alex, and can’t help but compare the performance to seeing it live after more than a year, while knowing how excited he had been at the rehearsal, jumping and moving around while refusing to practice because of his own jitters.

Of course it paid off, Alex, the bloody show-off, has the entire place entranced under his spell, not even the clients sitting on the bar stools, who had shown little interest in the performance through the night, could take their eyes off of Alex.

Henry absolutely gets it, but can't help the feeling of jealousy that courses through him. He desperately wants to drop to his knees to show Alex how marvelous he is, hoping he thrusts in his mouth like he does on his guitar.

[wammysgirl]

15 Questions/ 15 Mutuals

I was tagged by the SUPER COOL @finniestoncrane so thank you for this :3c

Are you named after anyone? I mean, from a technical standpoint yeah? our neighbours relative was having a kid and they decided on the name, and my parents liked it so much they stole it for me lol.

When was the last time you cried? A few days ago when having a really nice convo with my dad :') im soft as a marshmellow.

Do you have kids? FUCK NAH, I GOT NIECES AND THAT SHITS ENOUGH. Love em dearly but don't think i could be a parent full time when im at rn.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Uhhhh, sometimes? It depends on who I'm using it with because i can be really bad with it and i dont wanna have any miscommunication issues.

Whats the first thing you notice about people? STYLE, FASHION, FLAIR (dotheylooklikeiwannabetheirfriendinanyway) Generally I stare a lot at people with cool fashion, especially if they have detailed and fun printed clothing.

Whats your eye colour? Its a nice mix of green/Hazel :3c

Scary movie or happy ending? haPPY ENDING PLEASE. I am very bad with movie gore so i prefer to avoid any horror/slasher.

Any special talents? uhh, i can twist my ankles 180 degrees, and i can do a REALLY good trumpet impression :3c

Where were you born? in the local hospital, nothin fun. But I AM an Aussie sooooo

What are your hobbies? Mostly art, i do digital and traditional, I like crafting sometimes, and I play DnD once a week with my friends :3c

Do you have any pets? I have a lil old man of a jack russell, I've had him since I was in grade 4 and he's still plodding around <3

What sports do you play/ have you played? I don't play sports, aside from the mandatory ones I did in highschool, I do want to take up fencing though at some point!

How tall are you? 5'3, im short >:0

Favourite subject in school? ART, studio art and visual communication to be exact, because they went over the differences in fine arts jobs vs commercial arts jobs.

Dream job? Something within the arts industry, but fuck man if it isn't taking me a while to figure out if i wanna be in the spotlight or behind the scenes for work.

Now I'm just returning to tumblr so Idk if i HAVE 15 mutuals but @ghostfungus @lunabell02 @its-konoe and uuuujhhhhh, a lot of the other people i was mutuals with havent posted in YEARS so- OPEN INVITE I GUESS??? XD

[null-doesnothing]

I hope you dont mind but since you've left spaces open for sulu, scotty, uhura, and chapel I figured I'd step in with my own like a nerd

Sulu: dont have any specific sexuality or gender headcanons for the guy but he's gotta be some flavor of queer I fear. used to love going to beaches as a kid and cant stand it anymore, listens to a weirdly varied amount of music genres (like you'd look in his playlist and find top 20 pop list type music and the most niche shit you have EVER heard of. also some shit Chekov snuck in there that he decided he didn't care enough abt to get rid of) also probably the type of guy to just have the One playlist and its just his liked songs and everyone who looks at it is like "dude wtf IS this". he has no explanation. Next to Spock, he's the most heat-resistant of the group, though unlike Spock he actually handles humidity fairly well (cant relate im from the desert I would drown) Oh also you cant tell him shit cuz he's a major gossip sorry

Scotty: probably unlabeled honestly if I had to guess, I don't think he would care too much abt it... or think too much abt it.... busy w/ da ship. honestly this is barely a headcanon but the mf just loves feeling impressive at any given moment. about anything. ever. Also has definitely fallen asleep while working on something and almost wrecked his whole face. oh also he probably had a cat at some point in time that would sit on him as he slept and one night he accidentally like. threw it off in his sleep. and he felt really bad about it. dont ask how I know it was written in the stars shsshhh

Uhura: either lesbian or bi, personally I lean towards lesbian for her. can draw!! really well actually!! does it in her free time and sort of keeps them to herself, I think if she met Data they'd bond over the little art adventures going on there. Also she can only hypothetically cook. like- she knows what needs to go into a dish, and how to make it taste good, and she could instruct someone on what to do? but as soon as she actually physically tries to make a dish just. 🔥 uhhh has a collection of ancient (lol) cassette tapes that she Can Not Play because she couldn't find a working cassette player. Scotty's ended up working on making one as a side project

Chapel: lesbian. that is a lesbian woman with comphet. absolutely. 100%. has some betazoid in her but not enough to show At All (though to be fair, not much to show up anyways. also this is my watsonian explanation for Lwaxana having her exact face, though tbf ig like it could be the other way around but SSSHHHH) and was also raised on Mars for some of her childhood. oh also has just the most insane Bullshit Detector ever, it's very very difficult to get a lie past her. as a child her hair was brunette and got more blonde over time, but her hair in tos is dyed to give it a different tone. also this one goes against canon but ACTUALLY WEARS GLOVES IN SICK BAY AND GETS ANNOYED WHEN BONES DOESNT

ahem- now, I'm going to be very self-indulgent for a moment and, instead of just leaving it there, I'm going to attack one more character with my headcanons because he's my FAVE and NOBODY EVER MAKES HEADCANONS FOR HIM so uhhh. that's my thing rn I'm hijacking your post a bit

Sarek (I love him sm I'm sorry): as a little boy he was probably one of the least well behaved, most rambunctious, and emotional children on the whole of Vulcan, and for the most part was just generally a pain in his parent's asses for a long long time. eventually he became the hyper-strict unemotional logical vulcan he is now, but he definitely wasn't always that way, had to be drilled into him. that's feeds into my headcanon for why he treats Spock the way he does, there's slight fear at him acting human but generally, his fear leans more towards Spock ending up like he was as a child. totally incorrect fear my guy but hey idk what do I know. oh also I think you can't ever show him star wars because he would see Anakin's storyline and have a heart attack spontaneously. OH OH ALSO- this one ISNT a headcanon but I-Chaya was HIS pet first! the headcanon here comes in that I firmly believe when he was like. 6. he picked up little tiny baby I-Chaya and was like "im keeping it. mine now." like a child adopting a stray cat off the street and their parents begrudgingly accepting it.

sorry that's way longer than the other guys' I think abt him a lot

favourite star trek headcanons?

Oh boy I have ALOT hehe (thank you so much for asking :3) (and these are just my silly headcanons and it's totally find if you disagree with them <3)

Id like to hear your favourite headcanons @etherealspacejelly :3

Kirk: Hes trans and pansexual (or bi I like both), that bitch loves to vouge its his favourite dance move hehe, kept the boob window shirt from amok time and wears it just to annoy Spock, is Jewish, (this one is more for AOS kirk but whatever) He LOVES 90s and early 2000s rap and hip hop such as the Beastie Boys.

Spock: Jewish on his mums side, is gay MLM or unlabelled (I like both hc), really likes ambient music and falls asleep to it and white noise.

Bones: Is bisexual (yeah no, no character in TOS is straight sorry) loveeees to sing country songs when no one is around or can hear him even while on duty (Kirk definitely caught him once singing and teased the living fuck out of him), he loves to wear low raise jeans (old man whore), he has anger problems, a chronic smoker (yes yes he's a doctor but come on...he needs to let off some steam man) loves old country music especially from 20th century Earth, a massive fan of Dolly Parton and sings her songs regularly (his singing voice isn't actually that bad either, quite soothing but slightly deep)

Chekov: bi-curious (NO SLAVIC PERSON IS TRULY STRAIGHT...coming from a slav hehe) weed smoker so he probably smells like kush 50% of the time, is eastern orthodox (religion wise) he absolutely adores late 20th century (80s-90s) Russian Post-Punk such as Кино and Nautilus Pompillus, he also listens to Bladee and the drain gang in general (idk man he just seems like the average drainer/Bladee fan) also uses She/Him pronouns...(or that's just me projecting myself onto him)

...yeah you can CLEARLY see which characters are my favorites hehe (also I didn't put on hc for sulu scotty uhura or chapel since I barely have any)

[shadowtearling]

mm

[actualsunflower]

I have a huge life update to share rn--- My top surgery consultation is scheduled for July 5th!!!! I’M SO EXCITEDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!! I’ve also been vaccinated!! :D ANNNDDD MY LEGAL NAME AND SEX HAVE BEEN CHANGEDD!!!!! :DDDD kind of a lot has happened since I’ve been actually active around here But now I guess is the much harder part, my official surgery date will be set at the consultation, but there’s a required $1,000 fee to set the official date for my surgery. The $1,000 covers a portion of the surgery as well, and the base price for the surgery is $8,500. I’ll get the exact price on July 5th, but that’s their base rate. I need to earn or raise at least $1,000 of the total cost before July 5th to secure my surgery date!! I’m going to take commissions when I can, I have 1 almost entirely complete right now and then I can take on more! I’m gonna have a more detailed explanation of everything under the cut so this isnt super super long so pls read under there if you want all the deets Pls consider commissioning me or donating so I can get top surgery!! read more for more info and me being sappy abt my emotions--

I’ve waited so long for this and I’m fricken excited, it’s the last step in transitioning for me! It really means everything for me, I feel like I’ve been waiting forever and I can’t believe it’s finally happening !?!!! I am forever in everyones debt here and everywhere because I never wouldve even been able to start hrt if it wasn’t for the help here. I’m just so. Overwhelmed with emotion and gratitude I cant even tell how many times Ive cried and just felt like... actual gender euphoria since starting t..

So abt the appointment, I’m getting surgery with Dr. Javad Sajan, and I’m getting button hole double incision. Im serious his before and after pictures make me so emotional I am so happy and emotional for those people and I cannot wait to feel that kind of happiness and relief. But a big problem about this for me, is that he is in Seattle, and I live in southern Oregon. I can’t drive, so I have to rely on someone else, or take the train from a nearby city (Eugene). My consultation is over skype (which is amazing and a huge relief), but my pre-op appointment is in person, and of course so is the actual surgery. We’re planning on taking the train from Eugene because it seems to be the most reliable way to get there and back each time. Aside from my surgery, I’ve got to cover the price of the trip there and back (twice, once there and back for pre-op, once there and back post op,) and the price of a place to stay during the pre-op appointment. Right now my goal cost wise, is just the booking and base appointment price ($8,500, that’s including the $1,000 appointment setting deposit, which is just a part of the surgery cost and the base covers everything, surgery, the stay at the hospital, nips, anesthesia, everything). The full price is due at the pre-op appointment, and that’s the final bill. My insurance doesn’t cover anything because it’s out of state and county, and because its informed consent model. (which Im choosing because Id have to battle insurance for 2 years minimum if I was getting the surgery in Oregon, but I am very set on my surgeon after considering everything and calling many offices and looking through many subreddits and talking to ppl who’ve gotten it here and there) A lot of this information is on their site as well. As soon as I have my consultation, I will be right here to update everything and set the exact price, which I’ll also be including the price of transportation and staying there. As for paying, I’ve been applying to so many jobs, and even when I get interviews I never hear back from them. People keep telling me to stop admitting I’m disabled but I just can’t do that. Lying about being disabled doesnt make me abled and they don’t get that. I’m still trying though, and I am not going to stop trying until I get a job. But until then commissions and donations are my only source of income. I’ve been struggling getting help psychologically, because I have schizophrenia, and because I was diagnosed with adhd as a child, but I think I’m actually autistic rather than having adhd, and it’s been really hard trying to get diagnosed because I keep getting pushed off or told I cant have autism because I have paranoid schizophrenia or because its “just adhd”, but the medications are just making everything worse, and Ive tried more than one already. My medications for schizophrenia have started not working right, and when my schizophrenia meds get under control, it makes my adhd (?) significantly worse. Genuinely, I really dont know what’s happening. I really dont know whats going on with me right now and it’s hard and confusing and I keep swinging back and forth and it’s making everything deteriorate so fast I cant keep up with it. It seriously effects my ability to do anything at all, even art, and its been like this for the last 6 months. I am trying though, still trying to work, still trying to get a job, still trying to get a real diagnosis and help and Im not going to stop any of that. But I think getting top surgery as soon as possible is going to help me too, because dysphoria has just gotten so much worse focusing on my chest since t has started helping me pass and look so much more masculine. It’s like all my attention went from everything DIRECTLY to my chest and its almost unbearable. Even now since my sex has been legally changed I keep having the horrible thoughts of ‘why, why I am a man Im not supposed to be this way’ and shit idk. I’m getting too serious right now I have an appointment with the dmv to get a new updated driver’s permit with my name and fixed legal sex, and when I do that I can set up a bank account (I cant yet bcs I dont have a valid id/ id at all because I actually lost the other one and have been carrying around that paper one you’re supposed to destroy that is literally from 2016) and when I do, I’m going to set up a proper gofundme for my surgery and the travel expenses, but for now all I have is my paypal and online banking savings account. I’ll get that up asap once I have my id, though (Ive already been to the bank with my notarized judge passed papers and they wont take those yeah I know it’s stupid its like the same thing) But uhhh yeah! Thank you for reading this far if you did lol and considering helping me bcs my god, it literally means everything to me. pls share hehe

[systems-overloaded]

ooph, needing a life vest is a blessing in this case i guess. it covers my chest pretty well. i feel much safer (both from drowning which is a legit concern (RIP) and from any queer-phobia).

im in a very progressive state, literally have the pride flag attached to my electric wheelchair 24/7, and have pride stickers on my manual wheelchair all the time too. but i wonder if i only often feel safe because i can pass as just a more feminine gay guy. but when my AGAB seems like its probably obvious, and that i am visibly trans... maybe thats why its feels so scary rn? or maybe bc its a waterpark and there are alot of kids around which is hard for me (trauma triggers)? so in more of an exposed-wire already????

idk... i guess the exact reasons dont matter truly. just that i do/did feel that way. and thankfully now have been able to find a way to minimize that feeling, and hopefully just enjoy my time here.

...would appreciate well wishes, if anyone reading this can send them through the ether, thanks lol.

feel kinda scared and vulnerable rn. visibly a human with a short beard, and very hairy legs & arms, but also a noticeable chest that requires "female" swimtop. even with swim trunks and swim top. very visibly queer.

[i-have-a-crush-on-someone]

hi :,) im not sure if ur still taking asks but im still gonna send this bc im in a really silly place rn and i just need to get this out. also this might just be advice in general instead of a normal askhdjdh (also im sorry for this being so long)

so i started volunteering at this pet shelter about five weeks ago, and the first time i met this guy (who ill call A) was at the orientation i was going to just before i started volunteering. ngl, i was about 93% sure he was looking at me at random points during the orientation, and we made eye contact once. im not exactly sure what to make of that, but ig its still something???? idk i havent exactly been in a relationship before :,D... anyways cut to a week later, and i first start volunteering at the place (mostly) without supervision. pretty much A follows me around a lot while im playing with the cats and stuff, which i think was perfectly normal (i was new yk) but im including it anyway. the second time around though, i was playing with the kittens for a bit and i was planning on leaving and going to other cats, but A comes in and we got to talking and hit it off pretty well. third time, same exact scenario except we‘re talking and his brother comes in and he teases him abt stuff (honestly his brother scares me :,)).

again im sorry this was so long but i guess what im asking is smth like “help please im not sure if i have a crush or im in love and if he likes me back and oh no it’s only been four days and im head over heels” shsgsj ik this isnt much to go off of and u dont have to respond (this is really silly) i just had to get it out

Hello!! Hope sending the ask helped with letting it out in the open.

So, it definelty sounds like you are starting to like this guy, and I don't know much about being in love so I can't comment much on that. But still, sounds like you both hit it off well and even if it has only been a few days, hanging out more could be the best thing to figure out if it could develop into something. My advice would be to maybe hang out someday outside of work and get to know each other better. And hey, it ha only been a few days but that doesn't mean you can't crush on this new guy, lol. My high school crush began after the first couple of days of seeing him in my classes, so I think it is worth checking those feeling you have out, and ask if he would like to hang out ot have lunch with you. I wish you the best of luck and hope this helps!!

Also, don't worry about the silly part of it, crushes and love is silly and messy sometimes, so I think it is anything to worry about.

~Not a love expert 🌸

[ukai-simp-services]

hq character’s favorite lip smacker flavors

warnings: none, just slight cursing

a/n: wow the way this was one of my best ideas... anyway some of these are kinda repetitive so bare with me 😭

karasuno

hinata

i feel like hinata would be down for one of the really fruity flavors, like watermelon or mango sunrise. forgets it at home or in your car a lot so you always buy him extra.

kageyama

kags is def giving me the classic strawberry or cherry vibe, like the one that ALL stores sell. they’re the easiest to find and he likes the flavors.

daichi

ok i feel like daichi would use the peppermint flavor a lot, but i can also seeing him use the cinnamon flavor every now and then too, spice things up a little.

sugawara

i can see suga using some of the sweeter flavors, like strawberry as a daily chapstick and maybe sugar cookie when he wants to switch things up.

asahi

mans got the whole berry pack. uses them pretty frequently throughout the day, has a different flavor in different places. like one in his school bag, one in his gym locker, one at home, etc.

tanaka

ok tanaka probably doesn’t use use them that much, but when he does, he fucks w the soda flavors. like coke and sprite.

nishinoya

i don’t even think he knows what lip smackers are....but let’s give him the benefit of the doubt and say he would use one of the sugary ones. like the skittles one.

tsukishima

vanilla. no pun intended. i just totally see him using the vanilla flavor, probably the coconut one too.

yamaguchi

i can see bby using the pink lemonade,,,maybe the cucumber melon too mmmm. applies them a lot.

ennoshita

he uses that lime flavor (i forgot it’s exact name) but that and probably some fruity shit like tropical punch.

ukai

PLEASE. he wouldn’t sell lip smackers at his convenience store so he’s like ?? tf is that babe ?? but, once you show him he’d definitely be down for the rootbeer or coke flavor, he’s a soda man what can i say. BUT i imagine he’d keep it simple most of the time w peppermint. (u also make him start selling them so he ends up trying the fruity flavors~)

kiyoko

god, i wanna say the cherry flavor bc of the mf katy perry song (pls tell me if yk what im talking about) BUT i can also see her using the mint one and the coconut one too. queen has multiple flavors, as she should.

yachi

100% one of the candy flavors, like bubblegum. definitely the cotton candy one too. yachi’s lips always taste good period.

nekoma

kuroo

another cherry chapstick lover, but he spices his shit up with the cherry cobbler flavor. wants to taste good at all times for you~

kenma

doesn't use it often, but when he remembers or you remind him, he'll usually use a fun soda flavor like from the fanta pack,, or even just regular grape.

yaku

giving me grapefruit delight vibes...idk why but he just is. i can see him whipping it out in the lockerroom before practice starts, quickly applying it before any of the other guys come in.

yamamoto

omg ok so i feel like similar to some of the other guys, he’d shy away from using it in front of anyone. but i can see him using the tropical punch flavor ??

lev

tell me lev wouldn’t use the vanilla icecream one...like i can just see it. i feel like he would lowkey take pride in it too, like he knows that shit taste good.

seijoh

oikawa

this mf uses peppermint religiously. but this is oikawa we’re talking about so i think he definitely would have multiple flavors; definitely watermelon, probably chocolate mint, and for sure starburst.

iwaizumi

he’s kinda shy about using them so he sticks to the more lowkey flavors, probably like blue raspberry or kiwi. (pls gimmie a blue raspberry kith haji)

mattsun

i feel like he wouldn’t use it much, but he’d use the lemon drop flavor. loves using it during the winter bc of the weather.

hanamaki

another soda lover. i feel like he sticks to the coca cola flavors, like vanilla and cherry. (i love the cherry one omfg) maybe the root beer one too.

kunimi

bubblegum. that’s it. that’s the flavor. it’s always on him at ALL times. like that shit doesn’t leave his pocket, he once even accidentally washed his pants with it still in the pocket.

kindaichi

mmmm i think he’s definitely a berry guy, likes mixed berry or wild raspberry.

mad dog

yes i just labeled him by his nickname instead of his real name what about it- anyway. why do i think he’d use orange creamsicle on the LOW. like mf HIDES that shit. can never catch mad dog applying mf orange creamsicle chapstick. nope.

fukurodani

bokuto

omg ok bby definitely uses strawberry cheesecake or sour apple. ik they’re like two totally different flavors but, he just DOES. and he’d pucker his lips towards you every time he applies it like “BABY GUESS WHAT FLAVOR MY LIPS ARE” like ok bo c’mere then.

akaashi

he’s a simple man, he enjoys a nice strawberry banana lip smacker on his lips. maybe even pumpkin latte (during the fall of course) bc he’s festive <3

konoha

mans is using the dragonfruit flavor (i forgot if it’s just dragonfruit or if there’s another flavor combined in there) but, he literally just uses that flavor. like idk what to tell you. he just does.

yukie

ok i love her sm, i just know she would have strawberry kiwi and probably strawberry banana too. mmm yummy.

shiratorizawa

ushijima

i feel like kageyama, he would only buy the ones he sees at most stores...so a classic like mango or kiwi.

tendou

ohmygod, mans has a whole mf collection. like first of all, he has the fanta soda collection, obviously. then, there’s the candy pack with nerds, fun dip, laffy taffy, jolly ranchers, etc... he also fucks w any sour flavors. basically, everytime you kiss this man you’ll be tasting something different.

semi

another blue raspberry mf, but also i can see him using the dr pepper flavor LOL....i wanna taste>:(

goshiki

he’s a sucker for the grape flavors, regular of course, grape jelly, grape fanta, etc.

shirabu

mmm i can see him using pineapple. it’s a subtle flavor, but its the one he likes best. i don't think he'd use it all that often tbh, but when he does his lips taste absolutely ~fresh~

date tech

aone

PLSSS i just know mans wouldn't even know what a lip smacker was, would probably just be using normal burt’s bees like most people - till you introduce him to the wide range of flavors that lip smackers have to offer. he'd be like “hm, banana.” LIKE. either THAT or piña colada, he’s really trying for y’all.

kanji

cake donut?? do i have an explanation?? nope. i don’t even know what that would taste like, but i can imagine pretty sweet? just give him a mf kiss.

inarizaki

atsumu

PLEASE. he’d use the strawberry flavor ALL the time. like ok maybe occasionally the vanilla icecream too. but im so soft rn for ‘tsumu’s strawberry lips T_T

osamu

omg he’s such a cheesecake mf i just KNOW, so he’d have the strawberry cheesecake flavor. probably use chocolate moose sometimes too if he’s in the mood.

kita

this is NOT up for debate, he’d 100% use berry pie all the time. kita get ur ass here rn, we’re bouta smooch.

suna

pls bc he’s another one that’d only use it on the low. i’m feeling watermelon,, he’d always apply it before he sees you too.

aran

ooooo i can see him using cinnamon swirl, but also grape on a more common occasion. yummy....

extras

terushima

HHH sour apple for sure. he’d try to put on you all the time so you can taste like him too, he’s like “baby c’mere ;)”

saeko

bitch omg, why can i see her using the cherry cream soda one.... i literally don’t know where she could buy it but she’d fucking have it, like for SURE.

sakusa

STOP bc he’d definitely reprimand you for using lip smackers instead of a brand like ChapStick or burt’s bees. like shut up bitch...but also if you’re persistent like me, then you’ll definitely sneak the lemon drop flavor into his jacket pockets whenever you have the chance. you know it’s his secret guilty pleasure <3

[clumsyclifford]

2021 Writing Self-Evaluation

thank youuu @allsassnoclass​ i fucking LOVE this idea i am going to say SO many things rn i am so excited. 

prefacing this by saying i’m only counting the stuff i posted to bellawritess because i do have a different ao3 account where i post All My Other Fic Writing but (1) i don’t use it nearly as much now that i’m so focused on the rpf stuff and (2) don’t wanna doxx myself lol. so yeah! onward.

edit after finishing this: to absolutely no one’s surprise, i was about as long-winded as humanly possible on every single question i could. so i’ll put a cut and you can read my silly little musings underneath it if you like.

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 88 fics, apparently!! that’s everything i wrote in 2021, both prompt fics and... normal fics? idk what you would call those.

2. Word count posted for the year: clocking in at a whopping 351,552 words for the year. yeesh. get a life woman.

3. Fandoms I wrote for: 5sos, all time low, and one direction. 

4. Pairings: oh boy. from most to least according to ao3: jalex, malum, lashton, cake, merrikat, rilex, cashton, muke, mashton, 5sos ot4, and 1d ot5, plus also a handful of friendship fics.

5. Story with the most Kudos/Bookmarks/Comments: i really appreciate that these are all questions i can use ao3 features to find the answers for. thank you to whoever made this ask game. ANYWAY.

 for kudos, unsurprisingly, you seem so damn familiar takes top spot. that one also has the most comments (quelle surprise) and the 2nd most bookmarks. most bookmarks actually goes to and it all makes sense to me, the ot5 fic!! that’s so fun i love that. also, simply because it makes me happy, i’m sharing that the 2nd most comments/comment threads i guess goes to fever dream high in the quiet of the night, aka cruel summer fic. 

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): i mean, it’s hard not to say you seem so damn familiar. that’s the obvious answer, but i am hella proud of it. i mean, 40k in ten days, and look how fucking good it is!!!!!! also i did kind of forget about the ot5 fic but i’m proud of that one too because i wrote it for @mastasof-ravenkroft​ for his birthday but i did the stupid thing where i forgot to start writing it til like. the day before. or NIGHT before. and so i essentially just binge wrote the whole thing, but it was a fic i had wanted to write for a long time and i actually wrote it exactly how i wanted it to be, PLUS it’s a 5+1 which is maybe my favorite fic format, AND it’s an ot5 fic, which i’ve never done. and it turned out really really nice actually. so yes, very proud of that one. i don’t know if i should stop because this question only asks for one or if i should keep listing them because honestly i deserve it. 

i’m really proud of the friendship fics i wrote, but probably most proud of the first one, dearly depressed and brokenhearted (i’d like to let you know that boys cry too). that was a bit of a breakthrough moment for me and adri’s review of it lives rent free in my brain. so many songfics i finally managed to get out of my brain and into words, i’m proud of all of those. omg godlight fic? the good grace of that godlight, the weird ass luke hemmings time travel thing?? that was such a strange writing undertaking, and it ended up exactly how i wanted it. basically every time i finally got words down for an idea i’d been having and they were exactly the right words to make the exact fic i wanted, i count those as the biggest victories. ahhh the jewish cake kitchen fic i wrote for meg’s birthday, it’s so simple, was another example of that, plus i LOVED getting to write more jewish cake, and i feel like i absolutely captured my love of kitchens in that fic. also i NEED to include cruel summer fic here because. to date still one of the best fics ive ever written.

wait i thought of one more jesus christ im so sorry can you tell i love my own writing?? no but seriously, taylor @squishmichael asked me for a fic based on therapy and so i wrote keeping this up could be dangerous and i really AM proud of that one, because when they asked me for that fic i thought to myself jesus christ how am i going to capture the feeling of the song therapy. and then i started writing and like. i think i actually captured it so well. and some of the metaphors in that fic are just...mmmmmmmmmm. 

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): LMAO okay fine ill do this. but it’s not that i’m not proud of these just that i think if i wrote them now i would do a better job. the fic i wrote based on taxi, two punch-drunk souls all tangled in the wind, i would change a lot of that dialogue. i was really concerned with making it sound as close to what john the maine says in the song, but in retrospect that was a dumb thing to try and do, considering no one fuckin talks the way john the maine says people talk. also crazy is what i like, the one based on all my friends by tss, because...i don’t know it was just a very interesting choice of song to try and make a fic. like it has such a vivid story but i don’t think it was exactly the kind of story that should have been written by me. like i think for example anna could have probably done a more loyal job of it. and i don’t know. i sat on that fic for a while because i thought it was kind of strange. so yeah. i love both of those fics very much but yknow. asked and answered.

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: the comment adri left me on dearly depressed and brokenhearted. i think about it all the fucking time. it drives me to write more friendship fics. genuinely. honestly this is an embarrassing thing to admit but i forget the majority of the comments i receive once i’ve replied to them. it’s nice to go through comments on my fics and reread them though, because i don’t remember getting them!! hmm team @4thbrighteststar has said several times on multiple fics of mine that she would sometimes read a scene that made her want to act it out, and that landed really well with me. that always makes me happy. also every time she’d comment PSYCHHH MAJORRRR on yssdf, because yes i am.

and taylor had a really cool response to the godlight fic which maybe i’m not allowed to exactly explain what it was, but it was awesome.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: SPRING FIC EXCHANGE. YEEEEEEEEEEEEESH. so first of all i was juggling first schoolwork and then working at camp, and second of all, noah i say this with love but your fic preferences form thing was VERY contradictory and made it so hard to settle on a fic plot. or even to come up with one. essentially i was trying to write a fic that had all of the tropes of a fluffy fic, but make it angst. and also, i was not in a headspace for writing angst, cos you know how that kinda thing comes and goes, so it was twice as hard!!! and when i got to camp i’d be exhausted and working all day and then be done at like. eleven or midnight and then. have to somehow find time to write fic exchange fic. it was. difficult. i did finish it a week late and i am still sorry about that but honestly i’m surprised it was only a week. that somehow feels like a win to me considering what that fic put me through lmao

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: oh hell i feel like this happens to me so often but for some reason now that you’ve asked i am blanking on every single instance. oh! well i wrote this fic, who knew we were lightning? (i saw a spark before we heard any sound), and it was supposed to be a jack-centric fic based on jack and his relationship with guitars throughout the years or whatever. but then out of absolutely nowhere it became a jalex fic, which i guess shouldn’t surprise me but did. i didn’t hate it but it did blindside me. also, godlight fic completely surprised me mostly because it was one of those times where i thought “hey, hypothetically this song would be such an interesting fic” and then thought “nah but i’ll never actually write that” and then i wrote it that same day. another time that happened was with i can’t focus when you’re with me (i can’t sleep when i’m alone), the one that happened as a result of me having the chorus of XO stuck in my head. AND last answer: give me the worst of you (worst of you songfic). fic about a very unhealthy relationship, featuring jack barakat the toxic boyfriend. very unexpected writing venture on my part. although i’m more surprised that i posted it, tbh, because it was supposed to just be an exercise to see if i could write something like that, and i didn’t plan to post it, and then now here we are.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: okay so realistically i would just paste all 88 fics i posted in 2021 here, but obviously im. not doing that. so i’m gonna go with a piece of and it feels like i’m losing you twice, the sex (with my ex) songfic, because i got distracted in the middle of answering these questions just to reread that fic and MAN it slaps. here:

If they’ve both misunderstood the assignment then maybe they got the wrong assignment. Maybe they were never supposed to be friends. Maybe Jack’s hand on Alex’s knee and Alex’s gaze caught on Jack’s mouth is a spark that lights fireworks rather than land mines. Something beautiful rather than something destructive.

If they’re gonna explode either way, they may as well make it art.

i’m just gonna say it: that land mine metaphor KICKED ASS. i don’t know when i got to be so good at metaphors i’m pretty sure it was a super intentional effort in this fic but it paid off.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: oh man! well as previously mentioned i think i became a lot better at like...intentional metaphors and trying to vary the ones i make. also i learned the importance of a little bit of conflict in a plot and i did a lot of exploring different kinds of relationships between people, rather than just happy easy romance. that was really good for me to do. i think it helped me to write more realistic relationships than i had been. and maybe circling back to the plot thing but i sort of realized that there’s only so much you can do without conflict, cos then you just have a bunch of scenes, basically. and when there’s a driving thing in a story it means that the scenes are all leading up to something and that helps to guide the story and honestly makes writing easier a lot of the time. so those are some things!

13. How do you hope to grow next year: see #12! no actually i think i want to be better at showing and not telling. right now i’m kind of in the middle, i think i do a lot of showing AND telling, and i want to be able to trust my audience more. meghna is really good at this. i am still working on it. 

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): @tirednotflirting and @reveriesofawriter sam and meghna were easily my main audience for the majority of my fics. i don’t foresee that changing. i love you guys. also of course megs @igarbagecannoteven who had to literally put up with my melodramatic bitching and complaining about every single tiny problem i had with anything i ever wrote. megs you are my favorite rubber duck. yknow i was thinking earlier about how much i agonized over the title for, what was it. oh!! the title for situation overload (do it for baltimore)!!! and then in the end all the agonizing was worth it because it caused me to land on what i think is actually a perfect title for it. so thank you for dealing with my insanity so that the rest of the world can reap the benefits i guess. everyone who ever listens to me talk about my writing in any capacity, whether gushing about how good i am at it (which i do often) or complaining about how hard and annoying it is (which i also do often) has positively influenced my writing experience.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: many things, no conceivable way i can list them all. speaking of situation overload (do it for baltimore), that fic has a lot of pieces of my relationship with megs in it, specifically involving me getting her into baseball as best i could. i think ive mentioned this before but this jalex prompt fic you need a pick-me-up? (i’ll be there in twenty-five) has jack in a situation that is directly taken from something that happened to me, and yes it was absolutely fucking terrifying then. i projected my homesickness onto cashton in this prompt fic i’m a little kid and so are you (don’t you go and grow up before i do), and also the thing about lauren’s gerbils from this lashton fic for jess, you should know i’ll be there for you, is based on what happened to my younger sister’s gerbils. luke’s insecurities about his friends liking his siblings better in maybe this is just as good as it gets is straight out of a younger bella’s headspace (fortunately not something i worry about anymore now that we, yknow, go to different schools and are super different people and both adults, but ya know). to name a few.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: i am going to be brief because i got asked for writing advice earlier this year and wrote an essay basically, but it boils down to this: like what you write. if you don’t like what you’re writing, write it differently! write something new! write something no one else will read, so you don’t feel like you have to cater to anyone else! but seriously, write something that you can enjoy, because if even you don’t like the art you’re creating, you can’t expect anyone else to. if you can’t stand in front of a council and say “you will enjoy reading this because [x]” (if you can’t even say “because i liked reading it”).......you’re losing your most reliable audience member. be proud of what you create! don’t compare your successes to the successes of other writers! everyone has different goals, writes at different rates, prioritizes differently, prefers different tropes and types of fics. actually yeah i feel strongly about this. don’t compare yourself to other writers. you are your own writer doing your own thing. ask for help, take inspiration, set goals for yourself that are valuable to you, but don’t compare. if you try to become a writer that already exists, no one wins. you know that cheesy but very true oscar wilde quote? if it is even him? be yourself, everyone else is already taken? yeah. write your own stories, everyone else is already writing theirs. or something. you know what i mean. it was funny when i said i was going to be brief here. okay getting off my soapbox now. thanks for having me on tedx.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: oh!! yes!!! many!!!!!! oh what a fun question!!!!! i am still working on summer camp au but i recently picked it back up and wrote an important section of it so i’m cautiously optimistic that i can finish that sometime soon-ish and then can start posting it which would be very nice because i already miss having a chapter fic to update, and i think people are going to really like it. also there is the [redacted] fic which is SO funny and which will be finished and posted soon and i literally cannot fucking wait, i have kept this silly crack pairing a secret for so long and the fic has some of my funniest most entertaining writing but i can’t SHARE any of it without SPOILING it so i’m really looking forward to putting that into the world at long last.

beyond that there’s a jalex 5+1 that i’m hoping to finish (it is currently about halfway done), and i’m planning to write the long awaited (by me) elevator fic at some point, once i...decide what i’m going to write for it. i’ve got one more installment of tshirt jalex in the works, involving middle school band teacher alex gaskarth, and i think that one is going to be really fun once i finish it. oh oh also! this one fic from a prompt fiancee sent me (do you have time to hold on with me), it’s a lashton fic but i wrote jalex into it for funsies and i made alex nonbinary and ever since then i have just been thinking about he/they alex gaskarth forever and ever. i want to write more of them so bad. so like. maybe we will see some nb alex content sooner or later, hopefully.

and i know paige and meghna want me to write ocallakarth and ill admit im letting it sit in the back of my mind but i make no promises considering the existence of the [redacted] fic and other various factors. but it could be a fun exercise.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read. okay!! yes!! @tirednotflirting @reveriesofawriter @cringeycal @kaleidoscopeminds @igarbagecannoteven and also anyone else who sees this and wants to! if you read all the way to the bottom of this post then i feel like you deserve a tag so consider yourself tagged lmao. love you all, happy new year <3

[sports-and-fandoms]

About Kate

Firstly I don't hate the woman, cause I refuse to get invested into anyones personal lives, but I saw your post so I wanted to reply. What disturbes me personaly is that they first met when she was 14 (there are picuteres as proof) and she's been following him around like a puppy eversince, people say she even moved to dallas just so she could have a chance being with him (now this is ofcourse rumors so I'd take it with a grain of salt but yeah). Idk the age gap is just too weird for me, they started dating when she was 20 and Tyler was 27 i think.

Hey! So, first, thanks for taking the time to reply!

Alright, so, personally, age gaps don’t really bother me. My parents have 8 years between them, so im used to it. However, the fact that they supposedly met when she was 14 (i say supposedly not because im trying to discredit this, but because no one really knows how old she is rn or her exact age when the pics of their first meeting were taken) and now they’re together feels iffy to me, too. Im good with age gaps, but it’s just too weird that they met when she was underaged and now they’re together. It’s like knowing someone as a child and then having a relationship with them (it’s actually exactly like that lol)

im glad he waited until she was 20 and didn’t go for it the second she turned 18. I guess it “comforts” me, in the sense that im glad he wasn’t like waiting to pounce? the second she was of age. But still, it’s weird, i’ll give you that.

[calpalsworld]

Not "autistic anon," but also autistic, (being called maybe ableist made me want to put this out there before go to bed) i thought Zane was depicted that way purposefully by the writers. He has stereotypical traits like taking things literally, and has an actual humor switch. The writers have done things with Zane before like have him lose bodily autonomy (during that one Wu's teas short) and did something with his voice be it making him unable to be understood or talking too loud and the forced pirate voice by Jay. (what you're doing isn't too different from that, right?) I thought it was just a little iffy to distort his body and memory bc that could be interpreted as something not that I'm sure what exactly, it's some kind of disability. I dunno. I'm not good with putting this to words. I hope this makes sense.

Sorry I went to bed but now I’m awake 😭

Also I ended up totally spilling all my thoughts here rather than only specifically replying to you please forgive me context: my scary zane concept design, & my ninjago rewrite i refer to a lot 

Im a little confused but I think I get what you're saying? You're saying the Ninjago writers absolutely DON'T write Zane well (you listed examples of this) and you don't want me to fall into the same trap?

I had the opposite logic earlier. I thought: If Ninjago writers made Zane have stereotypical autisitic traits while also being a dehumanized robot, I may as well embrace it, say he is autistic blatantly, while also making him do funny/cool non-human robot things, so its clear as possible the two aspects of his character are literal and separate and not a metaphor for each other. But you're right! I do have a choice and I dont have to embrace things! :)

Like there were a couple ways I was gonna reject the original, for example, I never wanted Zane to have a funny switch, and I hated how other characters could fuck with Zane and he didn't even care 😬. I want to change that stuff. So youre right, if I am changing shit like that, it would be counterproductive for ME to GIVE him MORE traits along that theme. 😬😬😬 I should try to feel less obligated to portray Zane like he originally is. I still like the concept of "scary zane" (for reasons i explain below the cut) but I might tone it down a bit like with the claws and weird proportions and shit. I’d def make him look more skeletal and undead. That was my original intention, but i didnt execute it as good as I could have.... idk if anyone could tell thats what he was supposed to be like...my bad! But rn I dont wanna redesign him I wanna draw other stuff like normal alive Zane. Sorry LMAO 😳. Like I said in some earlier asks I think, I think Im gonna focus rn on how I should portray season 1 normal not dead Zane so thank you and feel free to share any other Zane thoughts ^_^ SOME OTHER THOUGHTS:

Also I Wanna Argue Some Stuff But I Understand its a Weak Argument Since All of This Context was Just In My Brain (so don't take this as an argument, just as me rambling): I don't want messed up things to happen to Zane and for it to just be ignored. I think if Zane is going to have fucked up things happen to him, as all characters must, its best for it to happen during a season where he actually addresses his feelings about being a robot (learning to accept that he will always be himself, regardless if hes "human" or the "original" or whatever. (thats how I always interpreted his emotions)). But I wouldn't have the other Ninja be very phased by Zane's looks because the whole point is they already love who he is (seasons 1-3 were about getting to know Zane) and now Zane himself just has to learn the physical, robot part of him is okay. Its about person-hood rather than humanity. Because the season focuses around Zane's soul, and because he lost his original body, I feel like I could mess around with his current, temporary body and have fun and make it scary. Because that body should be irrelevant. I understand it possibly being upsetting for an autistic character to be designed like this, but other people I talked to see it the opposite way. They find it comforting for him to look so different but still be himself and be so loved. SO IM ABSOLUTELY NOT saying its wrong to be bothered or to hate it or to feel any way. Just that I personally think it would be cool for Zane to be portrayed with a little spice lol, so thats why I like scary Zane for season 4.

Another Thing I Wannna Say But Is REALLY Hypocritical: (this isnt directed at anyone I just REALLY want to say this) I know I say "this is Zane but scary, he looks like fnaf" so he's obviously dehumanized, but I always felt like "scary" is more of an objective fact. Its an instinct. But what's "not human" is subjective. I think there is a problem with saying anything different from "average" human is dehumanized because that could extend to real people. Lol I know its bad for me to compare FNAF-ass Zane to real people, but I mean he could be real. People can have exposed teeth, and people can be shaped weird. And when someone first sees a person who looks like that they'll probably think "woah those features are scary" by instinct. And that surprise doesn't make someone ableist obviously. But bring that person’s humanity into question is NOT an instinct, and is fucked to shit. This is kinda a bad point for me to make since its about the fictional FNAF Zane I drew, and I am NOT implying ANYONE was thinking like this. [especially not the original asker anon who I am totally forgetting about at this point OOPS]. But I just thought it was an opinion of mine I couldn't go without mentioning when talking about dehumanization and disabilities.

^^^ I think you (anon) understand what I mean and might’ve said the exact same thing as me if you were writing a long ass response? I think this because you started to bring physical disabilities up and you said it was "a little iffy." ^_^ So we agree, but I don't see Zane's relation to real life disabilities as "a little iffy" I see it more like "complicated"? IF THAT DIFFERENCE EVEN MAKES ANY SENSE?????? I feel like a lot of things about Zane are really just complicated and need the right context, rather than the concepts necessarily being wrong -- NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT! THATS THE WHOLE REASON I DO THIS STUPID REWRITE! XD thats why a lot of my rewrite SO FAR has been the same concepts and plot beats, but different dialogue n specifics and such. I like a lot of concepts in Ninjago but I dont think they were presented correctly.....! :( So I guess all we can do is wait and see if I make Zane offensive or not....???

Also something about the memory part - yeah i agree i was surprised no one thought that was weird to make jokes out of his memory issues..... BUT I am like 100% firm on making his memory take longer to come back because I think its stupid how quick Zane was able to recover from literally dying. Like its just dumb to me. Hate it. (also bc memory & soul mechanics is ummm kinda important in my rewrite.... for reasons). Another memory thing btw, I was going to make his original amnesia come from hitting his head in an attack against the Skulkin when they stole his dads corpse, rather than his dad fucking choosing to make him forget. (its a sweet & iconic scene, but Um, WHY?!!!?!?!?!?) He has to follow data recovery instructions he finds in his dads diary. I think in that context it makes moments of memory loss somewhat different for Zane's character? Instead of loss of autonomy associated with disability, its a literal violent loss of autonomy associated with being traumatized by physical force. Idk how to phrase it exactly but I think that makes some vibes different?

Sorry, I think I got really distracted, and I don't know if I responded well to your points. Because uhhhh I think I agree with your stance actually? If I understand correctly? Fuck Ninjago writers for making the robot lose autonomy (a stereotypical robot theme) while also making him seem clearly autistic (NOT A HAPPY THEME FOR AUTISTIC PEOPLE) and not addressing it. And also auuugh Zane with a weird body is a difficult topic - kinda sussy pretty iffy.

Lol anyway idk if this made any sense and I REALLY rambled on you. but this was nice 👉👈 more Zane criticism pls love you and i love zane. i hope u dont feel mad at me because then it would be weird that im saying that lol. if you do feel mad at me tho you can send another ask (ILL TRY TO JUST LISTEN NOT RAMBLE NEXT TIME) but assuming ur chill rn, love you thnx

Take this page, don’t mind cole’s ass.

[spockasmr]

for the uncomfortable asks - 4, 6, 18.

4. tell me about your most vivid memory, good or bad.

this is bad but my dad's first breakdown lol i wasn't that young but i was still in school and it felt like it changed everything. i remember the power went out at almost the exact same time he slammed the door shut and left and now when the power goes out or the lights get turned off all of a sudden i panic. it happened when we were visiting his family back in egypt and it was the most miserable time to be stuck there with him and his parents and his brother all at each other's throats. and i've never been able to sleep in that apartment ever again it's so great and to this day i don't know why or what the Hell happened even though i remember that day/night beat by beat. but yeah it was very physical and terrible 👍 and nothing was ever the same again yay

6. what is something that you've always wanted to do but have never been able to do?

honestly can't think of an answer to this. maybe just doing more stuff on my own. not that i can't, i'm living on my own and working on my own right now but more like... just being able to go and have dinner on my own or getting a coffee and sitting down on my own. but i don't really have any... desire to do that or take myself anywhere so it's partly a lack of motivation and also thinking i don't deserve that or it would be a waste of Money. but also there's nothing within me that's like oh i have to go do that but there is just an overwhelming sense of oh there's the expectation that i should do that. im in london rn and i guess if i left id be made to feel like i wasted my time here not doing more. i don't know. used to do cinema on my own but really it was just if i ever got stood up

18. what is something you can't bring yourself to get rid of?

so much though i think ive gotten better at not just keeping everything i can get my hands on? idk if it's something i had in me because of my parents when we were worse off or my dad generally but i will hold onto as much as i can though now i know when to throw most things away that will never really be useful. i have a box for sentimental things and i have thrown things out of that because they make me feel like shit but i still remember them from time to time and then feel shit about throwing them away. i don't know if that answers that but yeah. at this very minute im hoarding receipts which i used to do a few years ago but tbh im using them as a coaster so they are being useful to me rn

[gabrielitas]

phew it's good to know i'm boy the only one super behind lmao

alright answering questions and asking some more because i have a funny little group of questions that mean nothing but i like to ask

alright so i do bias soonyoung 🙄🙄 didn't think you'd guess so early. i also like seokmin and minghao 🥴🤤 aLSO, WHY HAS SEUNGCHEOL BEEN LOOKING SO CUTE RECENTLY I CANT HANDLE 😩😩

outside of kpop i may or may not have had an emo phase (read: fall out boy, panic!at the disco, my chemical romance). i may or may not still listen emo music. i also LOVE CONAN GRAYYY. idk if he's still indie but i love indie too! probably one of my favorite genres though is classical (instrumental if you wanna get technical 🙄 been yelled at bc cLaSsiCaL iS a TiMe PeRiOd)

the best of us had emo phases ☝️ mine is a little longer lasting three years in middle school. due to this, fall out boy is one of my favorite artists! i’m also a big tchaikovsky fan, and i like doja cat a lot too!

in response to your question about 1518 strasbourg, this is when and where the dancing plague of 1518 happened dnsbsbshja. it's where the phrase "dance till you die" originated lmao. i think it'd be funny to witness this/take part in it. aside from that, id probably fuck with california in 1849 because the gold rush🧎‍♀️, france in the 1880s, or america in the 1980/1990s! i’m a history nerd courtesy of my father, so i choose all my time periods based off some of my favorite historical events! 1880s for architecture mostly, gold rush because lawlessness and the "wild west", and the 80s for the cold war :)

the night is beautiful if you take the time to live it. for me, my favorite time across the board is lunch time-12:00 ish to 3:00 just because the sun is highest and i feel happiest! i like the night when i go out on bike rides because i feel alive/ like i’m not wasting my teen years

GIRL IM NORTHEAST US TOO DJNSBSBSVABWB #goals lmao

i have 1 sister and she's super annoying🙄 i also have 2 cats and a dog (i consider them my siblings)

the most recent show i binged and finished was criminal minds, and i tried supernatural but it's just so bad i cant get past season 11. i’m working on hannibal right now!

the last book i really enjoyed was the summer i turned pretty! i’m a sucker for romance books 😩

questions i've got:

- do you have any siblings or pets?

- do you play any instruments?

- what's your favorite font?

- how many pillows and stuffed animals do you sleep with? (i have too many to count)

- would you rather live in an urban, suburban, or rural setting?

I FRIKIN KNEW U BIASED SOONYOUNG UR VIBES R SO HORANGHE I COULD JUST TELL and i gotta say ur the second person who’s had both minghao and soonyoung on ur bias list and i just find that so funny cuz they’re polar opposites to me (also u have impeccable taste with minghao that boy is my ult and has my whole heart) AND OMG RIGHT??? seungcheol needs to *CHILL*😤

omg yes conan gray😫 this is gonna sound whiny but heather was one of my favorite songs of his before it became a tiktok trend💅

and yes the best of us *did* have emo phases, mine lasted from late 8th grade into the first half of freshman year, so it was kinda short lived but it still happened lol

also, seeing tchaikovsky and doja cat next to each other in a sentence is so funny (but in a weird way i get it lol) i’m not the *biggest* classical/instrumental fan, but i have def used it as study music when songs with lyrics r just too distracting. back to doja tho!! have u listened to her new album?? do u have a fav song off of it? (i haven’t listened to all of it but i do have a couple that i rlly like)

omg how did i not recognize that u were talking abt the dancing plague!!!!!🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ idk if u watch buzzfeed unsolved or watcher but they have a series called puppet history and the episode on the dancing plague is one of my favorites! also omg yes another history nerd who knows abt history b/c of her dad!!!! i’m prob most knowledgeable abt wwii, the civil rights movement in the us, and the spanish civil war cuz those r my dads main interests and i was sat down in front of documentaries abt those topics at the age of like, 3 lol. and wanting to experience the wild west is such a perfect and iconic era to want to live in, and wanting to experience the cold war is so funny (b/c i’m sure the ppl who were living it without knowing the ending like us felt the exact opposite lol)

and yes the night is so beautiful when u just give it ur attention. like, on my birthday it was raining and i didn’t have school the next day (and my birthdays i’m may so it was pretty warm) so i just went outside at like, midnight ish and listened to the rain and crocheted and it was truly so nice 😫 also omg last year when covid had us all at home i went for a bike ride almost every day after school to just get out of my room and it was so nice!! it was my bike from when i was like, 12 but i’m 4’11 so i was still able to ride it without a problem lsnsksns

and yes pets r absolutely siblings, my cat prob acts more like s typical sibling than my two younger siblings do lsnsksns (srsly tho my cat is an asshole she fucked up my leg the other day cuz i gave her food late smh)

omg hun season 11?? how many seasons of that goddamn show r there??? i couldn’t get past episode 1😭 (i rlly only started watching it b/c of dean from gilmore girls sksnksns) the show i’m currently bingeing rn tho is downton abbey, as i’m sure u can tell from how much downton shit u had to scroll past to find my answer to ur last ask alskkskjsjs (i’m so so sorry 😭)

ooo that sounds like a rlly good book title, what was it abt? i just finished a secret history (which FUCKED ME UP MY GOD THERES A LOT OF MURDER) and i’m currently working on the sequel to my name is asher lev by chaim potok (who is one of my fav jewish/classic literature authors and also just a rlly good author in general)

for ur questions:

-yes i do have siblings! two younger (one four and a half years younger and one a little over nine years younger than me so i’m the oldest by quite a bit lol) and i do have a pet! my cat sweetie who is an asshole who i love very much

-i took piano for like a year in second grade but then third grade happened and i was rlly bad at math so my parents switched from paying for piano lessons to paying for math tutoring lessons and i now remember literally nothing from piano lessons sksnksns

-i,,, dont think i have a favorite font? i do like to write in cursive and have a collection of calligraphy pens that i bust out on special occasions so there’s that i guess lol

-ok i have two normal pillows, one chair/armrest/pillow thing (idk if that makes sense but that’s the only way i know how to describe it sksnksns), a body pillow, and a single stuffed bear that live on my bed

-ooo so this is difficult for me cuz i technically live in a suburb but we’re *right next* to a major city in my state (like i’m a 20ish min car ride from my states baseball stadium and a 20 min walk to the college of the major city) so this has kinda made me rlly like both? like, i like the quiet of the suburbs but i cant handle not being able to walk to the closest boba shop or movie theatre or bookshop but i also don’t rlly love the noise and lights that there are in the city at night. so idk sksnksns

what do u like more tho? the city or the suburbs? also since u asked the question i’m assuming u have a fav form and i’m now rlly interested in finding out what it is lol

goodnight!❤️ (or good morning if ur seeing this in the morning since i’m answering this at midnight lol)