#but i hope it is cos i wanna post something so bad
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scopophobia-polaris · 16 days ago
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So, to add on to Navi's post, because her whole read for the original was getting screenshots from the game to debunk what was said, of course....we are now here. I want to tell you that no one here disagreed with your conclusion about Ganondorf being a victim. What we here disagreed with was the method you used to get there. Simplifying Ganondorf down to solely good or solely evil is something this Fandom does all the time with little to no nuance. And even though you have written an eloquent essay, Published even! You twisted or outright made up parts of the game to get to your conclusion. In essay writing, that's called a logical fallacy, and the whole essay either twists what happens in the game or outright gets it wrong.
Now people are probably gonna wonder why I'm treating this like a big deal or why I'm speaking so blunt, because this is by all means very stupid fandom drama.
But I think when you're a college prof and you get an essay published and it's online for people to read everywhere without you, one, not giving the context behind Ganondorf's creation and the coding of his appearance and motivations, two the complexities of a corporate conglomerate in a notoriously socially conservative country taking aesthetics from countries who were historically colonized. And Three, The way that video games are a collaborative effort with usually no singular vision, this is very true at nintendo despite what people may think, and at any moment changes can be made for any reason by team leads or executives that would hinder or even hurt a story. It detrimental to the audience reading it that you do not provide them more of a couple of screenshots
Basically, many things go into a story and now I'm taking this more from a DOYLIST view right here talking about Nintendo. But I'm doing this because you keep trying to say..... well fuck man do I need to pull up more examples? Navi got them all, the whole essay is you trying HEAVILY to imply that Nintendo MEANT to do all of this, as in intentional in the story, idk I feel crazy, words have meaning, specific wording has implication, oh and this dosent even get into how localization can change things 😃😀 wording has meaning and sometimes translators don't have cultural contexxxtttttttt and to not even mention about Nintendo's history or even the short hand that comes from Ganondorf's design and the historical Orientalism behind it feels like a disservice to the paper, but much more qualified people then I have discussed the way Ganondorf is written and probably would love to discuss or link to previous writing again if asked.
And this is a cold take but Nintendo isn’t the place you should be looking to for deep story telling, they will always be a corporate entity first and the bottom line is a general audience, this does not mean JUST KIDS this means to a generalized population. And this is extremely cynical but a lot of people cant even handle the complexity of a female character who is mean, like Midna, do you really think people would handle a Ganondorf like how he is in Tp being portrayed in any form of film language as good????? This game dropped 5 years after 9/11, Nintendo was never gonna lose out in money like that.
And Dude people have given so much shit to HUGE fanartists and comic authors about their work portraying Ganondorf in a sympathetic light, you would of thunk more people would of picked up on Ganondorf's story being written as tragedy if there was something in the game that actually DID that. Maybe they would of written a blog post about how Midna saw Link kill Ganondorf and was ashamed of that or Ganondorf TOTALLY said the history of light and shadow will be written in blood thing before the final battle, you think people would of talked about huh why did Ganondorf say that there or something and maybe went 🤔 instead of it being argued that Tp Ganondorf had the weakest writing of the series until TotK threw a pile of flaming shit at my door with a picture of Ganondorf on it.
Navi also goes in depth on how Hyrule has not exactly stagnated like what was claimed in History of Light and Shadow by using the Goron merchants and Yeto as examples.
Rynling has stated that the cause of the stagnation and decline is due to an ineffectual leader that has "Not allowed its people to be revitalized by change and diversity."
Now I am familiar with the flaws of an undetermined national unity, I am very familiar with the subject, but I’m not going to speak like an authority. Id rather let someone much more qualified make that post and I link back to it, because i know its coming. But Navi said in her post that the idea of what could of happened at Arbiter's Grounds can completely blow over someone's head if they didn't play OoT first, and I think more or less this is accurate, certain things are lost in Wind Waker even with the recaps, but I wanna join in on this in my own way...
Rynling....you may say Hyrule has been on a decline during Tp......you may even think OoT had a more stable Hyrule or some shit.....i THINK YOU FORGOT ABOUT THE PLOT OF OCARINA OF TIME BAYBEEEEEEE
THE SUPPLEMENTAL MATERIAL THAT I CAN PULL UP TO PROVE MY SHIT ABOUT OOT HYRULE BEING DOG SHIT IN COMPARISON TO TP
Like if you're seriously gonna link me and Navi to your essay then I am about to go full BTW it's a Sativa and eat that bitch after midnight cuZ we YELLIN ABOUT OCARINA OF TIME ON THIS POST FOR EVERYONE🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟
All of Ocarina of Time's narrative is haunted by the civil war, the whole reason why Link is being raised in the woods is cuz of the civil war, the Sheikah are implied to have died out during the same conflict, and well its said that Hyrule was unified during it
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Civil War yet the translators use unified the country like it WASNT under a sole ruler before? Hello? I need to go back through the Japanese script for the game again to see if i missed something of the game and freak it harder. And do realize the Deku sprout in this screenshot says fierce war but every where else, including the Zelda wiki (not fandom) its CIVIL War.
The Gate to Death mountain and Simultaniously the fence at Zora's river gives us and idea that peace was....tenuous at best downright hostile at worse given relations with the Gerudo
so today we gonna do some fun comparing and contrasting the Gorons and how they are treated in OoT to TP
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and we gonna start with his racist ass BHJBHDBHKCJW
I mean, damn remmeber how mad Darunia is at Link for being the supposed royal family messenger? Link Unlocking the door to Darunia's room with Zelda's lullaby, I think it's a little funny that Darunia is hung up , you know, like he knows this is some disrespectful shit
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Hey wannna hear some shit? The gates at the edge of death mountain aren't guarded by Gorons and were not built by them you can tell, the only way to visit the mountain is to get permission from the King to go up and not from the people that actually live there
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God and like, there is something about the way Darunia locks himself in his room, like he does it to keep the ruby safe from all the other Gorons being so hungry that he's frightened they're gonna eat it, he doesn't know what to do on how to act about the Dodongos that Ganondorf summon on him for not giving over that rock. It qlmost sounds like when Ganondorf came in and Threatened Darunia, and that he (Darunia) sent a message to the royal family asking for help, why else would he be expecting someone to come meet with him?
"If I'm not mistaken, you came out here to eat the red stone too! Well, too bad! It's not here! What? That's not why you're here? You're looking for a "Spiritual Stone?" You must mean that delicious-looking red stone that was once displayed above the city! I was so hungry that I thought it would be OK to just give it one tiny, little lick...so I snuck up there. But it was already gone! I think Big Brother took it away. He always says that everyone is after that red stone! Big Brother has shut himself up in his room saying, "I will wait in here for the Royal Family's messenger!" this is a quote from the Goron that you can find on the middle of the rope bridge thing in Goron city.
Yeah so he sent a letter or something and no one answered yeesh.
contrast this all with TP where OH LOOKS WHO'S GUARDING DEATH MOUNTAIN
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so in TP spoilers, this happens
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Kakariko is more connected then ever! Renado here is wondering what the hell is going on with their FRIENDS. And yeah the Goron elder Gor Coron is trying to keep the last few people from kakariko left safe, and other Gorons, i mean, theyre keeping a piece of the fused shadow in there. also the way that entry into the temple goes in this game is cute, Darunia was freaking it cuz everyone is starving, but here Link wrestles his way up a mountain to ask the Gron elder whats happening since he was asked to come here by Renado, Gor Coron goes DAMN
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unless......?
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IDK ITS LIKE? ITS SILLY? Idk Hyrule isnt the best place but why try and act like this doesnt happen during TP?
so where am i getting at with this? the hell was going on back during OoT? If things are so odd and weirdly tense with the gates gaurds and non responses
"As time passed, the Triforce became a legend, and the different people of Hyrule forgot the laws and wisdom that the goddesses had left behind. Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo. It seemed every race of Hyrule was at the other's throat. Only the secluded Kokiri, sheltered by their magical forest and the Great Deku Tree, were spared the destruction of Hyrule's civil wars.
After 50 years of ceaseless combat, there arose a Hylian King of great wisdom, courage and power. Through his brilliant military campaigns and wise diplomacy, he was able to bring the varied people of Hyrule into a tenuous harmony. Treaties of peace were signed, and prosperity once again seemed to bloom in Hyrule. But no sooner had people declared peace in Hyrule than trouble once again stalked the land."
Tenuous Harmony, could you imagine if they dropped a line like this in Creating a champion? The tumblr side of the fandom would go fucking nuts with that info like OHHHHH SHIT WAS GOING ONNNNNN
This was ALL on the offical Nintendo Zelda website back when oot was the big game out, we have this cuz someone saved it to the wayback, THIS SCREENSHOT WAS FROM DECEMBER 14TH 2001, ABOUT A FULL YEAR AND A DAY UNTIL WIND WAKER WAS RELEASED IN JAPAN. THAT'S INSANE RIGHT???? ‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥
And then it all probably got deleted once wind waker became the new thing!!! Or when they wanted to modernize and deleted it!!! THAT SUCKS RIGHT????
And what's worse is that it introduces some new info and also clarifies something. Hey you know when I made that post like damn Darunia racist as hell
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"Warfare and strife became common in Hyrule, as the armies of the Zora marched on the Hylians. The Gorons fought the Gerudo."
NO WHERE IN THE GAME THE LEGEND OF ZELDA OCARINA OF TIME IT SAYS THIS, IT DOES NOT STATE THERE WAS CONFLICT BETWEEN THE GORONS AND GERUDO.....LIKE DIN GET YA KIDS.....IM LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR SOMETHING I MUST OF MISSED.
But Like oh hey a fucking explanation to why he just fucking says that, I figure it was cuz of Ganondorf trying to almond mom all of them or that he kept talking to the King and well.....Navi already showed the GENERAL reaction to the Gerudo in castle town.
it went from oh hes just racist to dARUNIA AND GANONDORF HAVE HISTORY????
But the interesting one is why did thy Zora "marched on the Hylians."
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Like sitting here like, I know a comic made in Germany shouldn't be a be all end all in shit I knew it never was and it would like. If you put this in warrior cats canonicoty categorization would be considered lower down supplementary material dubious canon, but their are things in the comic AND the Himekawa manga that behinds some behind the scenes actions given that LINK'S MOM HAS A MOSTLY CONSISTENT DESIGN WHAT THE HELLLLLLLL. And I always thought the Goron Zora war thing was stupid but Nintendo then had that out on their website, what the hell was going ON.
Because idk i didnt think much of Zora De Bon XVI and the Hyrulien King's relationship but
Now a days the Zelda website is much different and does not have lore pages like this anymore, it's more like a summary of the timeline. But yeah actually Nintendo approved shit, Hylian/Zora war.
Hyrule is progressing, its just going slowly, Hyrule is not AS stifled by its monarchy or a lack of integration during TP because Hyrule IS integrating, is people's are intermingling like is hasn't before during this game.
And this isn't even to get started on the E3 demo of Twilight princess that the trip that Link is supposed to take at the beginning of the game was to be the representative of Ordon at the "Hyrule summit
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and Hyrule is described in a VERY specific way
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Kingdom of Hyrule and neighboring realms? like theyre all not under the crown? so like???? FUN, that didn't end up making it in the game. the dailouge that is, But the remints is still there in the way the game is made up, like how OoT is built off is civil war bones
actually funny, Navi just got me screenshots of the way the dialouge was changed here
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Like stuff clearly changed during the demo and finished game, I should of been touching more on the intricacies of how like shit was just change for no reason sometimes but uh....
But maybe @rawliverandgoronspice would want to one day like about games industry stuff if you ever want to 😭 I know you're super passionate on this and I wish I like even off hand mentioned something about how like TP is also effected by how games are made but I didn't and I'm a fool but games are complicated as hell and that post you made talking a bit about it was fun ya know 👉👈 and the Beta of Tp changes a LOT of stuff, one Rusl really is like a brother to link in the way he messes with him, it actually makes some weird Nintendo licensed shit saying hes like a big brother to Link made WAYYYYY more since with the Beta in mind, but....that also mean they tried to keep the big bro vibes....but then put the dad ones in there too like.....uh...did..someone not change his summary anywhere?
that was my big thing i wanted to talk about, navi's already touched on everything else i just think the parallels here between the Goron quest between OoT and TP changes in such a nice way.
And like this doesn't get into other shit about TP, like if we wanna deep dive into shit ya don't gotta do it by twisting the story, like I was going and talking to @blackautmedia to ask with some help when it came to like.......god idk what i even said anymore i was going a mile a minute. He wants to write his own thing on Twilight princess so im not gonna step on his toes but he has recommended Arabs and Muslims in the Media: Race and Representation after 9/11 by Evelyn Alsultany, the link I provided here is too her website and her page on the book this link here is from her own site that has a pdf of a part American Quarterly with a paper by the same name.
Anyways i wanna reflex for a moment cuz ive been up for hours finishing this because my brain wont stop unless i do. But the thing that by all means started this, was not your reblog linking me and Navi to your essay, or that there is 2 versions i found out where the paper published one had a lot more context to why you wrote your tumblr post the way you did, Navi helped me get the parts that were cut, please realize removing these does not remove the sentiment from the essay, its baked in.
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fanfic, its a popular Fan interpretation that there was fighting between the Gerudo and Hylians after Ganondorf was caught trying to take the triforce, but this is not stated to of happened in the lore itself or even has evidence to back it up other then the Implications of Arbiter's grounds theory
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UGHHHH AND THIS AGAIN "Twilight Princess Delivers a subtle yet poignant protest against neoliberal discourses of empire reflected in the rhetoric of heroism inform the geopolitical movements of Japan throught the twentieth century"
WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING TALKING ABOUT......
i dont mean this in a stupid ass way, im saying where the hell was about the protest thing, wait i really shouldt take from the published one cuz you actually dumbed down the line for tumblr
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anyways again, where, Navi made it clear enough with her own post that, no, the way that Ganondorf is animated has no sympathy for him until the light is literally leaving him. Hell Twilight princess inst very kind to the gerudo either given that the only thing said about them is that they were thieves and nothing more. Like somehow OoT is more empathetic to the Gerudo, it doesn't just call them thieves, it aint great its not even good its just a bad portrayal of a people, and yet somehow OoT is willing to show the Gerudo in a neutral light at points then TP ever did.
but the reason i decided to just throw down a post is cuz i was pissed that you went after Ezlo for reblogging ME and NAVI's posts and purposefully misunderstood their fuckin wind waker post about ZELDA YOUTUBERS
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dude you had them getting genuinely harassed by people with 0 reading comprehension that thinks a snarky reply to a tumblr post means its 100% correct. Webbed. Site.
anyways, I hope people don't take this as a right or wrong way to interpret a piece of work, as stated before, I read your essay, navi read your essay, you changed parts of Twilight Princess to get to the conclusion of you paper...And im gonna be real but it's kinda crazy that you're using post colonial melancholia for this when it's got some.....well something like idk i need someone to do a full ass review because there are point where i gently raise an eyebrow im gonna be real. but also like
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like how do you read his book and then miss out on this, one of your whole big aruments is that hyrule is stagnate and not multi cultural and i had to grab screenshots and Navi had to get shit from the game.
like damn, do yall ever uh feel a strange sadness when dusk falls? i do. Idk this is one of the first and last times Nintendo ever delt with Ganondorf with some form a sympathy for him, cuz we got the dragon explosion in totk its like oh he's turbo evil now and he exploded you exploded him and yet the Gerudo probably still gotta pay for his shit from a billion years ago anyways idk idk idk pot shots at totk again.
I know you dug around a little for that post, and I understand from the numerous people that dmed me about that, you probably went on making an essay on their post so you could sound smart again.
And to be clear, I was told to drop some shit i was about to say about you because no one wants to start fandom drama, neither do I truly and any jab on the post itself would just be rude. people change and some people only learn to shut the hell up, so we'll keep it at that. I just hope you really don't truly recognize some of these people you started shit with.
So yeah tldr, uh.....idk, im going in for an autism screening in a month
also me watching the ending to windwaker cuz i wanted to say something about stong endings TP fans im sorry But Wind waker's ending hits no matter what best sequal to OoT thats isnt Majora's mask
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The History of Light and Shadow
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At the end of Twilight Princess, Ganondorf delivers one of his most memorable lines, “The history of light and shadow will be written in blood.” He is not wrong. As the player has witnessed over the course of Link’s adventure, Hyrule is haunted by ruins and ghost towns, a mere shadow of what it once was. The landscape is filled with numerous sites of past violence and empty spaces visibly marked by decay and wasted potential.
When Zelda tells Link and Midna that “these dark times are the result of our deeds,” she is referring to specific historical acts of imperialistic aggression. Hyrule established hegemony over its outlying territories by crushing the rebellions against its advances, but the kingdom has suffered from cultural stagnation as a result. Without the dynamic diversity symbolized by Ganondorf, Hyrule finds itself in economic and political decline, isolated from any contact with the world beyond its shrinking borders.
As a representative of a marginalized group of people who have been attacked and driven from their homes, Ganondorf is a tangible manifestation of the horrors of imperialism. He must be defeated, but doing so does not address the underlying problems that have resulted in Hyrule’s decline. I therefore want to argue that Twilight Princess uses Ganondorf to deliver a subtle yet poignant protest against the discourses of empire reflected by the dualistic “light and shadow” rhetoric of heroism that has resulted in tragedy and regret.
Keep reading
#oughhhhhh#oghhnkn eepy time yeah never agian#i have a whole thing about the triforce i wanted to say all this shit because of corruption and power but im so tired and ucked up what if#draw like crazy tomorrow or something like oh hbhbgb but uhhhhhh anyways anyways#now that i dont ffeel like i goot wAIT THE CHAINS BREAKING MAMA DIDNT RAISE A QUITTER#but like idk i dont like fightig or anything online i was just so??????????????? when Ezlo got hit for no reason like hi dont do that they#werent apart of this like#idk maybe im just a little venomus rn too but i also uh....would not be mkaing repeat posts where you wax academic about post colonial#ghosts but can reblog more then 8 posts for palestine in over a year??? like thats mean to say but with the context of Ori....#yeesh#idk bad look. there are real people to care about and this is why i dont wanna do internet discourse no more#its just stupid as hell and i have become SOOOOO normal#god lets hope i didnt eave lose ends i look ill rn ive been up over uh..........36 hours for some ungodley reason#wasnt even writing this the whole time i was clotecting eggs and laying down some diatematious earth for these birds#oh and then i get like.....IM GONN DRAW GANONDORF#I GOT AN ASK ABOUT HIM AND HES BEEN ROTATING IN MY HEAAADDDDDD#OOOOOOOO DORFFYDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#Anyways back to my shit i will hopefull never be this mean again because its fucking exausting#but like bunch of dudes in your dms like LOOK AT THIS and you go oh YEESH i am so sorry i was a teen when that happened#well anyways im gonna be doing my little tasks and stuff tomorrow cuz#AS I SAID THE CHAINS! I CAN FINALLY KRILL MYSELF (srimp dinner)#one of these days i need to designn this fursona i have in my head and post it#i got so many things to dooooooooo and yet#alright well that was a waste of time#maybe ill come back to this and point at myself like you should of grabbed sunset perril by the throat about the wold cock thing#okay it was average it wasnt even Terato i wanted to SCREAM#this is not normal right? dude come on get weird with that shit#oh shit i should play bloodborne agAIN WAIT IS ELDENRING CO OP A THING#oh i would FUCK SO SEVERLY IN THERE#I May get webfishing soon but after i do some stuff
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landoslvr · 9 months ago
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MRS CLARKEY | g. clarke
summary: a scroll through your internet presence as 'mrs clarkey'. [social media AU.]
pairing: fem!reader x george clarke
faceclaim: steph hui
notes: first piece for mrs george out of the wag universe. steph is gonna be the main fc I use for mrs clarkey, hopefully you like it! this is the longest one I've done so far.. definitely want to do a fic for their first meeting and for the useless hotline podcast- maybe even the ski trip!
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liked by user, user and 37,923 others
yourinstagram happy halloween 💋💋
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user you're literally so hot y/n
user I want to be you so bad
user how can I look like that
user jeez u flexible or something baby?
user the dress? the hair? the makeup??? unreal
yourinstagram thank you!! I did it myself xxx
user shes godly
user have fun tonight!!
user she's the only girl I know to have an impromptu photoshoot and then go out drinking
yourinstagram gotta take the outfit for a spin!!!
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liked by chrismd10, arthurtv and 58,283 others
georgeclarkeey you should've seen the other guy!
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user george wth
user its the vomit on the cheerleading outfit for me
chrismd10 looking good mate
wroetoshaw nice eyebrow....... eyebrow singular
georgeclarkeey yes I got that thank you
user AS IF Y/N FOUND HIM ON HER NIGHT OUT
user I KNOW!! I came from her tweets after everyone tagging this guy
chrismd10 you getting referred to as 'this guy' on your own post is so funny to me
georgeclarkeey well, you're huge aren't you?
imallexx loving the new look mate
user waiting for y/n to join the comments 🫣
user me too 😶😶
yourinstagram its great to know what you look like with both of your eyebrows george! a pleasure to have met you, despite the circumstances...
georgeclarkeey my left eyebrow was too intimidated by seeing betty boop in the flesh it ran away!
user my heart 😭
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liked by georgeclarkeey, max_balegde and 37,192 others
yourinstagram went on the useless hotline podcast this week to talk about me saving the george clarke! thank you very much for having me boys 🤍
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user she's just so pretty
user as if model queen y/n saved youtuber george clarke 😭 not over that at all
georgeclarkeey always a pleasure, you're welcome back anytime you feel like scraping me off of the pavement
yourinstagram anytime you need me, I'll be there to call the ambulance
user LOVE that coat
georgeclarkeey also feeling something.. or someone.. is missing from this post?
yourinstagram idk what you want from me here clarke
max_balegde ahhhhhh!!!!!! such a pleasure to meet the woman that singlehandedly saved my co-host from death <3 thanks so much for coming on, martini besties for life now
yourinstagram call me anytime you need multiple olives!!!
max_balegde three olives, extra dry!!
user stop I hope they all stay friends 😭
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liked by georgeclarkeey, chrismd10 and 39,219 others
yourinstagram casual 'saved your life/face' dinner post
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user nahhhhhhhhh because this is a date
user y/n looks so good 😭😭
user lets not ignore George Clarke wearing something other than a t-shirt
chrismd10 impressed you managed to get him in slacks!
georgeclarkeey your mum brought them for me
user THAT DRESS
user I just wanna be you y/n
user George has major cake its not funny
max_balegde literally should be criminal
georgeclarkeey you saved my life I am eternally grateful
yourinstagram 👽👽👽
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liked by georgeclarkeey, chrismd10 and 40,938 others
yourinstagram visiting the mountain tops with some new friends x
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user bitch we know that's george clarkey, fess up
max_balegde the love of my life really tbh, you look sooooo good
yourinstagram max I'll cry
user drop the link for the jackets!!
user that is george clarke's watch missy
user so you just so happen to be on a ski trip at the same time at george and his friends?????????? coincidence? I think NOT
user I know george is using ever fibre of his being not to comment on this right now
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liked by yourinstagrm, miniminter and 59,902 others
georgeclarkeey there's 'snow' way it's this cold in the mountains
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user Y/N TAKE OF THE SKI MASK COWARD
user we literally know it's her
chrismd10 handsome fellas
user literally just tell us you're dating guys
wroetoshaw high altitude my friend
user love these pics of the boys together
arthurtv distinguished skiers and snowboarders
charliehutchens really good ones too
user do you think y/n had to throw her phone out of her hotel room to stop herself from commenting?
user yes, yes I do
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liked by georgeclarkeey, wroetoshaw and 37,981 others
yourinstagram out and about ✈️🗺️
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user should we tell y/n that she posted a picture of George in the 4th slide and then proceeded to cut his head out of the 6th one????
user let her live in peace I guess
user wow no one is immune to stupidity these days 😭
user can't believe they took her so young
georgeclarkeey you're not getting that poster back
yourinstagram if you dont return my harry styles poster I will sue
georgeclarkeey I live with a lawyer, so good luck with that darling
user DARLING???? LITERALLY JUST PUNCH ME IN THE FACE NEXT TIME GEORGE
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liked by yourinstagram, stephentries and 61,192 others
georgeclarkeey chris informed us that you all know we're dating so no more discreet photo dumps I guess?
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user WAR IS OVERRRRRR
user quick everyone act like we didn't see this shit coming
user the way he tried to do her dirty in the last 3 pics but he literally can't
user she's just so pretty
user I wanna be her
max_balegde mrs clarkey!!!!!!
yourinstagram !!!!!
chrismd10 you're so welcome mate
user she's so gorgeous
user kills me
user george x y/n girlies won today
yourinstagram 🤍🤍🤍 love you big stupid idiot 🤍🤍🤍 once I posted the invisalign it was over..
georgeclarkeey guys gotta eat
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liked by georgeclarkeey, arthurfhill and 43,938 others
yourinstagram casual 'I can finally post my boyfriend' post!!!!
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user guys I love today
user this makes me so happy
chrismd10 the power of drunken lime bike rides!
yourinstagram thank you lime bikes
user the alien picture kills me
max_balegde can't wait to have you back on the pod as mrs clarkey
yourinstagram a promotion, for me???
user george is so cute, I envy y/n!
arthurtv it's about time tbh
user I've been waiting for this one
georgeclarkeey was worth losing half of an eyebrow I guess
yourinstagram maybe the eyebrows were the friends we made along the way?
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littlebeluu · 5 months ago
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Hi! Hope you're day is going well :)
If it's okay I'd like to request smth for marc, if not just ignore this haha. I actually have a few ideas but just pick the one you like the most :)
1. It's kinda similar to the one you already wrote I guess but reader being insecure cos shes not as conventionally attractive as other wags, like she's not ugly but she's not a model either yk? Maybe also like people online hating on her body and/or weight and she doesn't wanna make a big deal out of it but marc notices and like reassures her and stuff (also in my head, reader is like a really private person who doesnt like a lot of attention, has her social media accounts on private and doesn't post anything except a handful of stories every now and then but that's obvi just me, doesn't have to be like that)
2. Marc reaching reader catalan (in my mind reader can already speak Spanish but that's not a must obvi)
3. Marc teaching reader football and she's just really bad at it haha idk I think it could be cute
4. Height difference (I'm 5'3 haha so this is really a self insert) like maybe reader wearing his clothes for the first time and they're so adorably oversized on her or like just anything about height difference really :)
You can obviously change stuff about the requests if there's anything you don't feel comfortable with or don't like, I don't mind. Sorry if it's too much stuff at once btw, I'm not really good at writing this kinda stuff.
Thanks so much in advance already, I hope you have an amazing day (or night, depending when you're reading this haha)
I'll do other ones too 🫶🏻
I might have some trouble to do the second one cause I also don't speak catalán but I'll try anyway.
"Insecure"
marc guiu x female reader
warnings: none
The car engine hummed softly as Marc and I settled into our seats after training. Our eyes met in the rearview mirror, and I felt a flutter in my chest. Despite the hours apart, his presence still had that effect on me.
"Hey," Marc greeted, his voice warm but tinged with concern.
"Hey," I responded, trying to muster enthusiasm.
Marc's brow furrowed as he studied my reflection. "Are you okay?"
I nodded, forcing a smile. "Yes."
His eyes narrowed, unconvinced. "Are you sure?"
"Yes," I repeated, my voice barely above a whisper.
Marc sighed, reaching for the radio. As music filled the car, we drove in silence, the tension palpable. Every few minutes, I caught him glancing at me, worry etched on his face.
"I'm fine," I assured him, though the words felt hollow.
"You're lying," he said softly, his voice a mixture of hurt and frustration.
I hesitated, torn between protecting him from my insecurities and the need to be honest. "It's just..."
"Tell me," he encouraged, his tone gentler now.
"Why do you think I'm upset?" I deflected, buying time.
Marc's eyes softened as he looked at me. "I don't know, but I've noticed you haven't really smiled today. Not your genuine smile, anyway."
"Of course I did," I protested weakly.
"No," he shook his head. "I know you better than anyone else. I can tell when you're feeling down, even if you don't say anything."
His words hung in the air as I struggled to find my voice.
"What's wrong, babe?" Marc pressed, his concern evident. "You're going to tell me, or..." He trailed off, leaving the sentence unfinished.
I took a deep breath, feeling tears prick at my eyes. "I'm sorry. It's nothing important."
"It must be something if your smile hasn't been genuine in the past 24 hours."
"Yeah, well..."
"Just say whatever it is," he urged, his voice a mixture of frustration and worry.
"Honestly? People have been saying horrible things about me lately," I admitted, my voice cracking.
Marc's expression darkened. "What? Who?"
"It's okay," I tried to reassure him, wiping away a stray tear. "Really. Just forget about it."
"No," Marc insisted, pulling the car over to the side of the road. He turned to face me fully. "What happened?"
I hesitated, feeling foolish. "It's stupid."
"Just tell me," he pleaded, taking my hand in his.
"Your teammates' girlfriends posted photos with me yesterday," I began, my voice barely audible.
"And?"
"Everyone's saying horrible stuff. Like... like I'm the ugliest and fattest girlfriend."
Marc's face contorted with anger and disbelief. "What? Who's saying this?"
"People online," I mumbled, ashamed of how much it affected me.
"So nobody real?" he asked, his tone softening.
"Well, they could actually exist somewhere," I argued weakly.
"Don't even joke around," Marc frowned. "They don't deserve any importance. You shouldn't read comments under their posts anyway."
I sighed, looking out the window. "I know I shouldn't, but sometimes I can't help it. It's like picking at a scab - you know it's bad for you, but you do it anyway."
Marc's expression softened with understanding. "I get it, but those comments are toxic. They're not worth your time or energy."
"You're right," I admitted, turning back to face him. "I just wish I could stop caring what others think."
Marc reached over and squeezed my hand. "It's not easy, but we'll work on it together. Your worth isn't determined by strangers on the internet."
I took a deep breath, feeling vulnerable. "I guess sometimes those words hurt more than others. Like... maybe I wish I had more confidence. Being known is so overwhelming, and I wish I knew how to get over myself. I guess... I envy the confidence of other girls I meet."
Marc's eyes filled with understanding and love. "You're not ugly nor fat, Y/n. You're beautiful, inside and out."
"I didn't say I was, people said it," I protested weakly.
"But you think it," he said softly, his thumb tracing circles on my hand.
"No," I lied, unable to meet his gaze.
Marc cupped my face gently, forcing me to look at him. "Tell me something, Y/n. When was the last time you read something nice?"
I felt a rush of guilt for worrying him. "Well today, you told me something nice this morning. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound like such a baby."
"Stop apologizing," he said firmly. "You're beautiful, and I'm so lucky to be your boyfriend. But more than that, you're kind, intelligent, and strong. Those people online? They don't know you. They don't see how you light up a room, how you make everyone around you feel special."
Tears spilled down my cheeks as Marc's words washed over me. He pulled me into a tight embrace, and I buried my face in his shoulder.
"I love you," he whispered into my hair. "Every part of you. And I promise, we'll work on building your confidence together. You don't have to face this alone”
As we sat there, wrapped in each other's arms, I felt a weight lift from my shoulders. The cruel words of strangers seemed to fade away, replaced by the warmth of Marc's love and support.
"Thank you," I murmured, pulling back to meet his gaze. This time, my smile was genuine.
Marc leaned in, his lips meeting mine in a soft, tender kiss. It was gentle and reassuring, conveying all the love and support he had for me. As we parted, he rested his forehead against mine, our breaths mingling.
I reached up, running my fingers through his hair before pulling him in for another kiss, this one deeper and more passionate. When we finally broke apart, we were both slightly breathless.
Marc started the car again, but before pulling back onto the road, he turned to me with a mischievous grin. "Now, how about we go get some ice cream and plot our revenge on those haters"
I laughed, feeling lighter than I had in days. "Ice cream, yes. Revenge... maybe we'll save that for another day."
As we drove off, hand in hand, I realized that while I couldn't control what others said about me, I could choose to surround myself with love and positivity. And with Marc by my side, I felt ready to face whatever challenges came our way.
Before we reached the ice cream shop, Marc pulled over once more. He cupped my face gently and gave me one last, lingering kiss. "You're beautiful," he murmured against my lips. "Inside and out. Don't ever forget that."
I smiled into the kiss, feeling truly loved and cherished. With Marc's support and these tender moments, I knew I could overcome any insecurity. We drove on, looking forward to our ice cream date, our hands intertwined and hearts full of love.
111 notes · View notes
pugh-bug · 2 months ago
Text
Marooned
Art Donaldson x ex wife reader
Part 2 of 2 - read part 1 here
Word count: 2,235 words
Warnings: smut , viewer discretion is advised. 🔞
Finally posted! I hope you enjoy, I loved writing this and I think you can tell because I don’t normally write this much in one chapter. Obsessed with these two and their messed up co dependency. Let me know if you wanna be on my tag list for ALL Art fics 🫶🏻💕
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You watched Art stand up to refill your glass as if this dangerous accident had been a planned date all along - as if you weren’t here by chance. He was being chivalrous. That meant he wanted something.
“Do you love him?”
It was Art who had been your way of life for so long, been your reason to get out of bed on bad days and never leave it on good days. If someone were to ask you if that feeling of devotion had been felt for another, could you look them in the eye and say what wasn’t true?
“Not enough.”
It came out as a whisper but he heard and if you thought he’d be amused by your little confession you were mistaken. He was frowning, still standing over you, checking his watch.
“It’s half 1,” There was shame in his voice as he spoke suddenly. “There’s a spare bedroom down the hall - on the left. You should rest.” Not once did Art’s blue eyes meet your own. A part of you knew he hadn’t called for the coast guard and that part of you was relieved but to ensure you stayed the night just to give you the spare room…what an odd decision. It was too late to question it.
You knew a hot shower and fresh clothes was what you really needed but whisky driven tiredness had hit you hard. “Well,” You stood up slowly, trying to catch his eye and failing. “Goodnight.” Art didn’t return the saying until you were down the hall and even then it was barely a whisper.
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The bed was pristine, fit for royalty, you were equally overjoyed and horrified that this was the ‘spare bedroom’. Art never talked of buying a boat when you were married, you couldn’t help but wonder if this was a mid life crisis purchase. If it was it was worth it. You eyed the wardrobe, feeling too freezing to sleep naked.
“Something…please…” you mumbled, rummaging through the piles of spare bedding and sheets until you found - “Jesus…” It was your nightdress, you were sure of it. He’d bought it you as an anniversary present, along with some ridiculously expensive earrings, and even in low lighting ten years later you knew it. The slight rip in the hem from when he’d gotten too excited that night, the barely noticeable fading from the wine removal disaster. It was your dress sitting in the spare room on a boat you’d never been on. Why?
You checked the time: 1:44am. Art was awake, you were sure of it, why not ask him? He’d certainly asked you enough questions tonight. After slipping on the dress you tip toed, bare foot, back to the hallway. There were two doors but one was clearly marked ‘Closet’ so the answer was clear. Art was in bed behind the door inches from you. You looked to the boat walls for guidance, as if someone was about to come out of hiding and advise you on the situation. No one came so the boat remained silent.
Knock knock
The pounding in your heart began to fade as the moments passed. He’s asleep, he hasn’t heard, good, it was wrong, you tried were just some of the thoughts swimming in your head as you waited, your face mere centimetres from the door. I need to go to sleep, it’s late.
“Y/n?”
It only took Art a few seconds to notice your attire. His hair looked the same so he’d been awake. Art’s hair always went spiky whilst he slept.
“I was cold, care to explain?” You gestured to your dress and Art inhaled deeply at the sight of you so bare. He refused to take too long gazing, sensing your anger. “I,” to lie did cross his mind but you’d call his bluff you always could. “Kept it after everything.”
“Why?”
He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes widening in disbelief at himself and your question. “I just…”
“Just what?”
“I couldn’t throw it away.”
The man looked crushed, his eyes begged for your forgiveness and understanding. It reminded you of that night, how he’d begged then and how you’d refused to concede. It was all too much and too odd. A tear threatened to fall from your eye as you shook your head at him. “Why am I here?” You whispered as you begged Art for some cosmic answer to your sadness, he wrapped his arms around you and held you. Tightly. You held onto him, your bodies melting into one another as if the embrace was enough to fix everything. In that moment it almost was.
“I’m glad you’re here,” he whispered gently, stroking the hair on the top of your head as his other arm held you right against him. “I missed you.” Your ears pricked up at that. Wiping your eyes you pulled away, trying not to look as shocked as you felt. “You missed me?” You wanted to be annoyed, to be horrified at his words and that look of devotion plastered on his face. It wasn’t fair - not after everything that had happened.
You’re not allowed to miss the woman you cheated on and divorced. You’re not allowed to stand on your fancy yacht pretending like you’re just a guy and not a grown man - grown tennis player - who dominates the sports world for a living. All of this you knew to be true and yet you couldn’t find it in yourself to be angry. You’d almost died, alone, in the middle of the ocean and who was there to save you?
He held you like he’d missed you, almost rocking you side to side as you inhaled his familiar scent. “You didn’t call the coast guard.” You mumbled into his shoulder.
“Hm?”
Knowing you needed to see his face, you pulled away again to look up at him. “You didn’t call,” his eyes were transfixed on your mouth and your eyes as you spoke. “The coast guard.” Art’s face was impossibly close to yours, his lips not quite touching one another. You knew if you had decency your mind would be with him back home. Back home in your perfectly comfortable little life. Your modest house filled with modest, pleasant memories.
“Ah…” Art exhaled, his cold breath causing your eyes to flutter. You could still get him to call someone, you could still go home to your life and pretend none of this had happened. Nothing had happened, you’d done nothing wrong. As your mind flipped and circled, Art’s arm snaked up your back to move your hair off your neck. I can still go home but of course you couldn’t. Standing in front of you was the only man you’d ever felt taken by, pulled toward and pushed away all at once.
Sensing your unavoidable guilt, Art pulled away. You felt the loss of his body against yours immediately and swallowed a sigh. He stared at you, willing you to say something but what neither of you knew. “Do you want me…to g-“ but Art had no time to finish, you’d already pleaded a ‘no’. Within seconds his lips were on yours, his hands were in your hair and yours were round his neck. He still kissed the same, still with feverish need and unquenchable desire. Your heart was pounding loud enough for him to hear and all the guilt ridden worries had dissipated.
Somewhere you’d locked away the moment Art kissed you were the words this is wrong this is wrong this is wrong playing over and over. It was a shame you couldn’t hear it. All you heard were yours and Art’s desperate, quaking breaths and the sound of the door closing as he pulled you into his room. You only broke apart when he lowered you onto the bed, the sound of the mattress creaking and his frantic movements to rid you of your dress filled the air.
Art left you kisses down your neck, chest and waist until finally he kissed your core. You knew you were wet but you hadn’t realised quite how much of a mess was between your thighs until you heard the unmistakable sound when his finger entered you. The boat was rocking gently enough to send you to sleep but Art’s increasingly eager movements had your eyes wide and your heart thrumming. He licked a long strike up your pussy before beaming up at you. “You taste the same.”
Hastily you sat up, not letting him ravage you like he so wanted, and pulled off his shirt. He whined at the loss of your thighs around his head but calmed when he realised what you wanted. He could always tell what you wanted from him, even if you didn’t use your words or even gesture he intrinsically knew. He knew your body and all your tells even after so much time spent woefully apart. When someone knows every inch of another that knowledge never really goes away.
To oblige your impatient nature, Art took off all his clothes and pulled you onto his lap. You sank down onto him without hesitation, Art’s arms closed in around your back. There wasn’t an inch between any of you, not even your head which was resting in the crook of his neck. Your eyelids were heavy but you could still make out the blackened waves rising and falling through Art’s window. Art exhaled…he wanted you to move.
After kissing his neck you began slowly, painstakingly slowly, riding him. Your legs were thrown over his thighs, making it easy for him to stay as close to you as possible. His chest rose and fell as you began to speed up. Little gasps and moans fell from his lips as he watched you in awe, through lust tinted glasses. To him you were an angel. In that moment you were his reason for being. As you arched your back, pushing your breasts closer to his face and closing your eyes he knew he’d do anything for you.
It didn’t take long for Art to thrust up into you, feeling every inch of him inside you suddenly pulled a loud moan from your throat. He wished he had his phone so he could hear you again - play your moans and gasps again on a loop relentlessly. He’d never get sick of pleasuring you, of feeling you drip onto his thighs and claw at his hair.
“I,” Art grunted as he met your rocking hips with his own, quickening his pace again. “Missed you so much.” He barely finished his sentence before you sank back down onto him, impossibly fast, and kissed him - not letting him speak. Don’t ruin this, you wanted to plead, don’t make me think anything through. Your high was coming quick, you just needed him to keep touching every inch of you. Don’t stop don’t stop don’t stop.
“I’m…” You opened your eyes for a moment to stare at Art’s while you bounced up and down, feeling your thighs ache from the effort. To distract you perhaps, Art began biting and kissing your neck knowing where your pulse was and how sensitive you were. A blissful moan left your lips as he kept hitting that spot deep inside you where you needed him most. You’d almost forgotten how big he was. Almost.
“Art!” You exclaimed as just when you thought he couldn’t go any faster he did. All that training had given him impressive stamina and you were reaping the benefits sinfully. His moans grew louder, as did yours, and every few seconds you’d kiss again and muffle the desperate “I’m close” pleas.
Without warning, Art clamped his arms tightly around your waist so hard you knew he’d leave bruises and pounded up into you with desperation. The noises were pornographic, the bed creaked under the strain of his frantic movements and all you could do was writhe in his tight grip and take it. That familiar tightness began to feel louder in your core. Suddenly your toes curled and your eyes rolled back as a wave of unrelenting pleasure hit you from deep within. You’d known nothing like it, you felt high.
Art, not far behind, kissed you one last time before his thrusts faltered and you felt his warm cum spurt inside you, coating your walls. “Y/N…” he whispered into the night like a prayer, overcome. The two of you stayed like that for some time, his arms wrapped round your waist and your hands caressing his face. Neither of you spoke until he slipped out of you, sighing at the loss of your warmth.
“I’ll have to leave tomorrow.”
Art refused to look at you, his heart aching from your cold words. Of course you had to leave, you weren’t his wife. You weren’t his.
“Art?”
He looked at you. Your hair was unruly, your face flush and your lips swollen from the forcefulness of all that kissing and you’d never looked more beautiful to him. Ignoring the seriousness of your tone, Art gently pulled you into his arms so he could spoon you. His arm rested on your belly as he left gentle kisses on your neck and shoulders. It was his turn to stop you from ruining the moment, from letting reality bleed into his bedroom.
Reality could wait until morning.
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Masterlist
Art fic taglist: @theynothem @amorisxx
103 notes · View notes
tonysbed · 10 months ago
Text
bad idea, right?
Charles x Fem!ex!reader
Summary: Charles and you break up but just can’t stay away from each other.
A/n: Another Charles social media au 🤭
Also, I love Alex so no hate to my girl okay 😞😘
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E!News
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liked by f1fan, y/nbabe and 729.689 others
E!News After Break up with long term boyfriend, Y/n was spotted in Harry Styles car crying. Find out how the it couple broke up in the link in our bio!
user727 nooooo
userboo EXCUSE ME
Y/nbabe WHAT?WITH WHO? IM SORRY
leclercfan16 Broke up and hopped onto the next guy. What a whore
y/nmywife shut the fuck up.Y/n and harry were friends BEFORE she dated charles
user57 dude what
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E!News
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liked by f1fan, y/nbabe and 968.629 others
E!News Charles Leclerc was spotted with a new girl just 3 weeks after the break up with his long term girlfriend Y/n Y/l/n. Was this the reason for their sudden split? Click the link in our bio to find out!
y/niswifey the resemblance between y/n and his new girl💔
user46 He’s got a type..
user19 this hurts more than my own break up istg
Y/ncharlesendgame god lord
User59 I just wanna cry.
User70 who’s she?
User402 This hurts but the fire album we’re gonna get gives me hope for SOMETHING
user29 She’s gonna roast him😭
y/nmylove oh he’s so done lol
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y/ny/l/n
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liked by taylorswift, arthur_leclerc and 2,380,296 others
y/ny/l/n Burned.Out now on all streaming platforms
tagged harrystyles
taylorswift 🔥❤️
liked by y/ny/l/n
zendaya amazing ❤️
y/n/l/n love you 🐨
y/niswifey OH ITS GOING DOWN
user68 “Your new girl is my clone” MOTHER OMG
userlol she knew she ate
y/nbabe I mean they do look a lot alike.. But we haven’t seen them since like 4 months 👀
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E!News
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liked by f1fan, y/niswifey and 729.528 others
E!News Charles Leclerc and Y/n Y/l/n were spotted after one of his races, 11 months after their break up! Are we witnessing a comeback? Click the link in our bio for more!
y/niswifey pleaseeeeee omggg
f1.cl16 I want them back so baddddd
user89 Id sell my soul to know what they were talking about
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y/n posted a story
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y/ny/l/n
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liked by taylorswift, charles_leclerc and 2,399,268 others
y/ny/l/n are you ready, nyc?
tagged charles_leclerc
comments are turned off
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y/nupdates
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liked by y/niswifey, cl16fan and 280.791 others
y/nupdates CHARLES AND CARLOS AT Y/N‘S SHOW TONIGHT OMGGGGG
y/niswifey are they back together now? Are they not?😭
user89 maybe we’ll find out tonight 😦
use.r29 His mom and arthur were also spotted there😭
y/niswifey Oh she be having a family reunion 👀
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y/n
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liked by charles_leclerc, taylorswift and 1.372.829 others
y/n love performing w ya 🩷
harrystyles me too👀🩷
user68 what’s happening? I know he is co writer but AHHEEJWVEJWFZ
user58 I like them but i need charles and y/n back istg
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y/nupdates
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liked by fifan, y/niswifey and 639.369 others
y/nupdates Y/n was spotted being super cozy with her co-writer and friend Harry Styles
user68 WHAT
y/nishot help, I'm still at the restaurant
user57 nonononono, MOTHER WHY
user29 I love harry but i just don't think he's a good fit for her
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charles_leclerc
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liked by carlossainz55, arthur_leclerc and 599.268 others
charles_leclerc Im no longer your muse 🛥️
arthur_leclerc 🔥
user18 why do I have a feeling the caption is directed 🌚
y/nbabe first it seems as if he and Y/n get back tg and then she gets w harry.Im so confused rn😭
f1fannnn she never said that they’re back together 🤷🏼‍♀️
y/nbabe still feels weird smh
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Part 2 will be uploaded soon!
160 notes · View notes
lostcherise · 3 months ago
Text
Overcome
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Summary: In which Jesse accepts the money Walt gives him and decides he deserves a second chance in life, but only if he gets to have it with you.
Warnings: mentions of drug overdose, mentions of future miscarriage, angst with fluff, this is post s5e8 (gliding over all) but the nazis never happened
Word count: 5,397
A/N: this is loosely inspired by one of my favorite songs from my favorite band and some lyrics used throughout the story will be written in italics. Hope you enjoy!!
Whoever was at your front door sure seemed to be persistent. Persistent enough to wake you from your peaceful slumber at - you glanced over at your digital alarm clock - 3:38 A.M. Great, just fucking great. With a grunt, you swung your legs over the side of the bed, the wooden floor cold against your bare feet. You narrowed your eyes at the metal baseball bat that rested next to your bedside table. For a second, you thought about not taking it with you, but no intruder would be polite enough to knock before they came barging in. But then again, given the crazy life you've had this past year, it was better being safe than sorry.
Bang. Bang. Bang.
With heavy steps, you trudged down the stairs as the banging grew louder and more frantic, feeling somewhat grateful your aunt was working the graveyard shift at the hospital that night, and you were alone. You swiftly unlocked the door, positioning your bad high above your head, ready to bust heads open, and opened the door.
"Jesse?" you were stunned, to say the least. He hadn't spoken to you in almost two months, and now he was standing at your front door, at the crack ass of dawn. "What the fuck are you doing here?"
"Come with me." his voice was pleading and frantic at the same time.
"Co- go where?" you raised your voice. He had basically dropped off the face of Earth for the hundredth time and as always he expected you'd come running after him. Because that's what you did.
"I don't know." he sounded frustrated but it seemed to be directed mores so to himself rather you. "Anywhere!"
"Jesse, why don't we backtrack a little, okay? Come in, let's discuss this inside."
"No, no." he shook his head, his eyes were wide. Although he was acting strange, he didn't seem high, a state you had seen him in multiple times. Something else seemed to be bothering him, but you refused to go anywhere without any explanation.
"For fuck's sake! Look, I don't wanna fight, my money's in a bag in the back for you." he motioned at his parked car on the side of the sidewalk. "Let's go, now." this time he sounded defeated, almost like a lost child, and your heart ached for him. To deny all the hurt he'd been through would be a blatant lie.
"What money, Jesse?" you warily asked and hugged yourself. It was March and you were in a flimsy tattered t-shirt, and sweatpants, barefoot at that.
"Look, if you come, I'll explain on the way. You comin' or not?" he was growing impatient at your lack of cooperativeness.
"Jesse, I can't just up and leave! I have responsibilities." you countered.
"Oh, like what? Working at a strip club?" that was a low remark, even he knew that. You saw it in the way he grimaced, as instant regret kicked in, but you knew better than to get angry at him, he was kind of right.
"It's what's going to get me through nursing school, you of all people should know that." you shook your head, even if you couldn't get mad at him, you couldn't help but still be disappointed.
The first time your paths crossed were four years ago, you were fresh-faced and straight out of high school. Just barely legal. You had just moved to Albuquerque from Roswell at the first chance you got. The relationship with your parents was strained, so you could bet on the $300 in your pocket - that was all you had on you at that time - that your parents were on cloud nine the moment you had stepped foot out of the house. Thank God for your beloved aunt that had taken you in, or else you would've ended up living in a tent on the side of the street, addicted to the crystal. Not that landing a job as a stripper at 18 was the brightest idea, but old men loved spending the entirety of their pension on you, so the cash flow was good. Plus, you had a roof over your head at all times. So, in your mind that counted as doing okay.
Jesse had come in on your third day with his group of friends. Initially, you thought he was going to be just another sleazebag, which he was to an extent. However, he wouldn't bother you the same way the other patrons did, with you he seemed more reserved, which was very odd given how he was with the other girls. He would come in twice a week, just to see you, admire you on the pole. Then came the private dances, and after five ones, you guys would end up talking halfway through. After that, he would offer to buy you drinks in attempts to keep talking to you, and it worked. That was when the lines between customer and client started to blur and you entered the danger zone. From client, he became your dealer. You were the one who had approached him on the matter, just needed to get your hands on some weed to wind down. Then, came the crystal. Although, you ultimately decided that was not your thing, you hated how paranoid and anxious it made you, so you stuck with the occasional joint here and then. After that, from dealer he got upgraded to friend, and from friend you somehow ended up to now - whatever the hell now was.
See, you knew you cared for Jesse as more than just a friend and you liked to think that he did too. But you knew better than to go tredging that path, ultimately there was no happy ending for the two of you on the horizon, and that's what pained you the most.
"I'm sorry, it was out of line." Jesse looked sheepish. "But I have more than enough money to get you through nursing school and build a new life together a-"
"Why me?" you interrupted.
"What?"
"I mean, why with me?" you asked nonchalantly trying to fight the butterflies in your stomach.
"You know I can't do this without you. You and me, 'till the end of the line. Ride or die." Jesse's pleading eyes searched your own and you hated yourself for even considering his offer. Just like always, you were so willing to go after him, even if that meant him dragging you into the hellfire with him.
"I'll let you know by tomorrow, morning. Get some rest, Jesse." you sighed, closing the door and you went back up to bed. You tossed, and you turned on your bed for what seemed like eternity, as you tried to fight off the thoughts that kept you awake, finally giving up when you saw the sun creeping through your thick curtains. With a frustrated scream, you kicked the covers off of you and preactically leaped off your bed, You walked over to the small walk in closet opposite your bed. A small part of you was screaming at you, that this was wrong, the wrong thing to do.
Yes. Yes, it was.
But leaving Jesse on his own? That was something your love for him wouldn't allow you to do. Maybe, this was finally your way out and what if you were too blind to see? It was better to live with the consequences of bad choices, rather than the constant regret of not giving it a try, being plagued by the constant what ifs and could've beens.
You grabbed a large duffel bag on the top shelf and started mindlessly shoving in whatever article of clothing first came in your line of vision. Taking a step back, you took in the sight of your now half empty closet. It scared you how willing you were to pack up and leave everything behind. It's not like you were a first timer at this thing, you had done this before and you ended up okay.
The sound of the front door unlocking brought you back to reality. Shit, you had to tell your aunt.
"Hey, you're home." you greeted your aunt with a hug.
"Sweetie, why are you awake? Is everything okay?"
"Yes." she gave you a pointed look. "Well, not really." you admitted.
"Uh, how do I break this to you." you struggled to get the correct words out. "Jesse and I are leaving town." you exhaled, a small weight was lifted of your shoulders already. Still there was so much weighing you down, but she shouldn't know.
"Wha- when? Where are you going?" she couldn't mask the sadness in her voice. She never had children, but she loved you like her own and to leave so suddenly was a lot to take in for your aunt.
"We're thinking of, uh, road tripping across the West Coast." the lie came easy. "Take in new sceneries, you know youngster stuff." you tried to laugh off the tears that were beginning to brim your eyes.
Your aunt stood silent in front of you, she wasn't stupid by any means, she had suspected things about the kind of life Jesse was leading; she had tried to talk some sense into you when he had first came into the picture, but to no avail. So, she let you be, you were a big girl and you were going to learn on your own. And if there was one thing she knew best about you, is that once you had made up your mind, nothing was changing it back.
"Okay..." she trailed off, accepting your decision defeatedly. "Please be careful, that's all I ask." she said, before pulling you into a much needed hug.
"Yes, I promise I'll stay in touch." you hugged back tightly. She pulled back to take a look at you with a tearful smile, her lips quivered as she smiled, and you mirrored her reaction.
"I should better go, tell Jesse. Call at work later too." puffing out your cheeks as you exhaled. You wiped your palms on your thighs, they weren't dirty, it was just a habit you did when you were nervous.
Within thirty minutes, you found yourself in front of Jesse's front door, the duffel bag sitting heavy on your shoulder. You set the bag down and rang on his doorbell.
"You're here." Jesse greeted you with sunken eyes.
"Aren't I always?" you asked, it was more of a rhetorical question both of you knew the answer to. Jesse leaped into your arms and let out a choked sob, his sudden change of emotion made your chest tighten.
"I thought this time was going to be different." Jesse cried into your hair and took in a deep breath. The familiar smell of your vanilla coconut perfume calmed him a bit. You were his calm.
"For a moment, I thought so too." you admitted with tears of your own, silently rolling down your cheeks and pulled him in closer against your chest. Neither of you said another word, as you silently held each other, until Jesse decided to break away about a minute later.
"I'm ready to leave, like, right now." Jesse rested his forehead against yours, his striking blue eyes searching the comfort of your own. Briefly, he glanced down at your parted lips and thought about closing the gap, and enclose you in a fiery kiss.
But the romance thing never really went well with him, so if he got to keep you by his side as his friend, then he'd have to compromise. With a sigh, he shut his eyes and pushed those thoughts away.
"Let's go."
──────
The door thumped rhythmically, as you struggled to find Jesse's spare key. The 90lb clay pot that adorned his entrance scraped against his porch, as you struggled to push it to the side. A single key lay beneath.
Soon, you were met with an unquestionable stench. It smelled like sweat, drugs and rotten food. You gagged at the state of Jesse's living room, unfamiliar bodies laying on top of another, trash and food strewn all across the floor - which was suspiciously sticky.
Your breath got caught in your throat once you caught sight of Jesse. He was slumped against a giant speaker, his chest moving rapidly. Your legs almost froze in place, it was the first time you had seen him so out of it, so lost in the blue that he was losing himself. He groaned softly, and threw his head back as he struggled for breath. Within seconds, you were by his side cradling his head.
God, he was burning.
He moaned in pain and held your hands. He tried to hold your gaze, but his eyes kept rolling back in his skull, you were losing him.
"I'm dying. I'm dyi-" he cried out and gasped for air.
"Stay with me Jesse, please." you cried, as you dialed 911. "Help is on the way." you reassured him as you held him against you.
Jesse turned to look at you when you sat down in front of him, breaking him out of his memory.
"Hey, whatcha thinkin' bout?" Sliding a steaming cup of coffee across the small motel room table, you gave him a soft smile.
"About that time you found me when I was overdosing." he tried to match your smile, but his pained eyes had something else to say. He chuckled to himself and took a much needed sip before he spoke. "I know this mind sound cheesy as gell, but-" he paused to look deeply into your eyes. "You're like a bringer of the calm, you're the only thing that keeps me grounded and sane."
"Jesse-"
"When your arms wrapped around me when the fever took, thought I was gone for good, but you brought me back. You are the reason I'm sitting here today. So, thank you."
By the time he was done talking, you were a bawling mess, the images of Jesse laying helpless, crying out in pain in your arms were tearing a hole in your chest that you had tried so hard to mend these past few months. Jesse cupped your smaller hands in his, brought them up to his lips kissing each knuckle, lingering on each one before moving on to the next one. It was an act so small and simple, yet so intimate, it sent tingles down your spine.
It was those little acts of love that made you fall deeper for him.
"So," you cleared your throat, your hands remained enclosed in his, enjoying his warmth. "Where to next?" you asked, as you looked out of the window taking in the view of Aspen mountain. Although, there was no snow in Aspen at that moment, the mountain was still black and white, the trees peaking through the snowy slopes.
"Depends on when we wanna settle down." Jesse said with a genuine smile that reached his eyes this time.
"Settle down?" you repeated with a giggle, heat rushing up to the apples of your cheeks. That idea, although something you had dreamt of often, still seemed so foreign to you. You, settling down with Jesse. Ex stripper and ex meth manufacturer getting a chance at the apple pie life, living in a white picket fence house, two kids and a white Labrador. "That sounds so domestic." you commented.
"Yeah, why not?" his deep voice trailed off. "It's till death do us part."
"That's for married couples. We're not married." you shook your head at him and you brought your mug up to your face, in a failed attempt to hide your reddening face from him.
"Some day." his gaze was intense and serious, none of his usual mischievous and flirty grins in sight. He meant every word he said. You almost choked on your coffee, and chose to remain silent instead.
"I was thinking Alaska." Jesse broke the silence and leaned back into his chair, lips pursed deep in thought.
"Way too much cold. How 'bout," you paused and tapped your chin as if in deep thought. "Ohio!"
"There's nothing in Ohio." Jesse looked at you, almost disgusted at your suggestion.
You bit back a laugh while he watched in disbelief. "Okay, fine. What do you like?"
"I want there to be trees. Like, live in the woods, that would be even better. Oh, and maybe next to a lake? Some extra space, so I could do some wood work." he mused, with a distant smile.
"Wood work?"
"Yeah, like, maybe built a chair or something." he almost looked embarrassed. "Do you remember when I had told you about that box I had made in high school?"
"Yeah, the one you exchanged for weed." you raised a teasing eyebrow.
"Yeah, that one. I was thinking maybe I, like, made a business out of it." he shrugged with a smile and leaned in closer to you. "I'm gonna build our furniture, too."
"Oh, so we'll be living together?" the butterflies in your stomach were threatening to fly out of your mouth, but you tried to keep your cool, as you leaned in even closer, only a couple of inches away from his face. His warm breath was tickling the tip of your nose.
"Oh, yeah." his voice was barely above a whisper. "And we'll go to bed every night and cuddle... and stuff." he added in a low and suggestive tone. Now, his nose was brushing against yours and the only thing that was left for him to do was pull you in a much awaited searing kiss. Instead, he moved his head to the side and kissed you just on the corner of your mouth, to which you embarrassingly whimpered.
Jesse just leaned back into his chair and continued on sipping on his coffee leisurely, as if he he hadn't basically admitted that he dreamt of marrying you some day.
"What about upstate New York?"
──────
"So, what's your new name again?" you asked Jesse after a boring game of "I Spy" as you continued your journey up northeast.
"James Driscoll." It sounded so foreign coming out of his mouth, but it was something he had to get used to for the rest of is life, if he wanted to do this second chance thing the right way.
"Can I still call you Jesse? I'll pretend it's your middle name." you giggled.
"Why the fuck would I go by my middle name?" he shot you sideways glance, before focusing back up on the road ahead.
He was met with a shrug for an answer. Lots of people liked their middle names more. However, Jesse's case was different, as many little ties he had to his past life, the better. That, in turn meant that you had changed your name too, for good measure. Just in case someone ever tried tracing back to Jesse through you.
The vacuum guy had made an exception for you in that you were allowed to contact your aunt freely. Even if he wasn't too happy about it. It had been about ten days since you had hit the road and you gave her check ins every two days via payphone. I should call her tomorrow, first thing.
Boredom was hitting you like a ton of bricks, you started making fart noises with your mouth. Watching blurry trees though the passenger window could only be entertaining for a little while. With a sigh, you reached over and turned on the radio, the soft melody of And I Love Her by The Beatles filled in the silence.
Jesse hummed softly, a gentle smile dancing on his lips. He reached over the console and took your hand in his, intertwining your fingers with yours, his thumb softly caressing yours, placing soft kisses in the back of your hand. Averting his gaze momentarily from the road, his eyes searched for yours, and although he didn't speak, in his way he told you - well, showed you - that he did in fact love you. It just came easier to show it, rather than have the words come out.
He held your hand until you found your hotel for the night.
──────
A faint jingle was heard on the background, indicating a new customer had just come in the bar. That night the shift was moving kinda slow, it was a Wednesday night, and it was just you and Natalie, the bartender, and all four tables at that time had been tended to. On top of that, it was an hour till closing time, and all you wanted to do was teleport to your bed, in your comfy pajamas - that in actuality were Jesse's old clothes - and preferably snuggled up against him.
"Oh, new hottie alert." she purred, as she basically eye fucked whoever came in behind you. "Don't look, he's coming this way." she added hurriedly just right when you were about to turn around and take a look.
"Jeez, okay." you threw your arms up in fake defeat.
"Hello handsome. What can I get for you tonight?" Natalie greeted him as he moved to sit on the stool next to you.
"Whiskey, neat." An all too familiar gravelly voice spoke up beside you.
"Sure, thing." Natalie replied, pulling out a glass in front of Jesse and poured from the most expensive bottle that was reserved for what Natalie deemed the hot ones.
Although you knew Natalie's subtle advancements would practically go unnoticed by Jesse, you couldn't help the tiny speck of jealousy that crept its way into your chest.
He mumbled a soft 'thank you' and took a sip. Jesse let out an appreciative sound, eyebrows shooting up on his forehead in faint surprise.
"Yeah, it's one of the expensive ones." you spoke up from next to him. "That means she thinks you're hot." you whispered with a giggle.
"Oh, well. Remind me to leave a good tip." Jesse's lips curled around the rim of the glass, and he took another sip.
Although you would have loved to sit there and chat with Jesse, your shift was sadly not over yet and you had to do your job. You sauntered off, deliberately swaying your hips from side to side, knowing Jesse's eyes would be transfixed on your hips.
"She sure knows how to get your attention, doesn't she?" Natalie came up next to him, from her side of the bar, observing the way he was drinking you in with his eyes.
Jesse agreed absent-mindedly, his mind lost in old memories of you, the way your hips swayed the same way up on that stage, as you would walk up to the pole and spin sensually. Those tiny bikinis you'd wear during your routines, would leave nothing to his imagination. Or, when you had given him his first private lap dance, when you had stripped completely naked in front of him. The strain in his pants felt the exact same as it did right then at the strip club. Shaking his head, he averted his gaze and tried thinking of something else.
Maybe about how it had been about nine months since the two of you had moved to Amherst, and although you literally acted like a couple, he still didn't have the balls to actually kiss you. Sure, he'd kiss you all over your face, he would always pull you in his chest every morning and leave searing kisses on your shoulders, while on your daily morning cuddle session. But kissing you on the lips, to him felt like entering dangerous territory, it felt like trespassing. Hell, he even called you 'babe'.
But his previous dating history, Jesse had grown scared.
Besides, life was going well as it was.
You were now on your first year of nursing at UMass, you were working as a waitress at a small bar, he had gotten a job at Home Depot and kept himself busy with side projects - he had transformed your garage into a wood working studio.
Life was good. It was just that fear kept him from making it even better.
The bar grew more quiet as people started leaving. When the last group of people bid their goodbyes, Jesse downed the last sip of his drink and slapped a $20 on the bar. With two swift steps, he came up behind you and snaked his arm around your waist as you were cleaning up your last table.
"I'll be outside." he mumbled, his voice deep and low. You shivered ever so slightly when you felt his lips brush against your ear lobe, his scruffy beard tickling your skin, and just like that in a moment he was gone out the door.
"You have some explaining to do about you and that hottie." Natalie teased, with a hand on her hip as she threw a towel over her shoulder.
"Tomorrow." you waved her off.
"Tomorrow's your day off." she pointed out.
"Exactly!" you giggled and stuck your tongue out at her and resumed at cleaning up as fast as possible. You didn't want Jesse to wait out too long in the cold. Although it was November, winter had come early and you had the first snowfall two days ago.
You let out a loud sigh and you untied your apron, and folded it before throwing it in your backpack. Your arms shook as you reached for your thick woolen cardigan and threw it over your Henley shirt. Of course, you couldn't forget about your thick parka jacket, then your beanie, scarf and gloves.
You weren't used to this much cold.
Once outside, you bid Natalie goodbye and parted ways, you walking over to were Jesse was leaned against the wall, having a smoke.
"There's my little onion." Jesse teased you about your layers of clothing. Laughing, he grabbed the ends of your scarf and pulled in to him, and without a second thought brought you in for a kiss.
To your dismay, it didn't last long. Both of you pulled back, shocked at what had just happened. You simply stared at Jesse, at how he was looking at you with confusion. Then fear. Then guilt.
"I'm so-"
"Do it again." you cut him off before he could apologize.
"What?" his hot breath was fanning against your nose as you looked him in his eyes, then down at his lips.
"Kiss me, Jesse." you whispered softly. And so he did. You didn't mind that it was close to freezing out, Jesse's kiss was enough to light a fire within you, as his lips moved languidly against yours.
And just like that, life became even better.
──────
Life really did move along great as the years went by. Even after you had gotten your nursing degree, you and Jesse had decided that had grown to love Amherst, so you both decided to stay permanently.
Jesse had left Home Depot, he now owned a small business, building his own original pieces and restoring antique pieces on the side.
You had even gotten a dog together. You and Jesse had found her while trekking Mount Holyoke, and you both had instantly fallen in love with her. A Beagle, she was barely 1 year old at that time. You both decided to name her Echo, because of the way her little puppy cries echoed before you had found her.
Your relationship was going steady, your love for one another growing with each passing day, and you really didn't think you could be any happier.
Up until you saw those two blue lines appear on the pregnancy test. You hid in the bathroom at work, during your lunch break and took the test. At first, you wanted to do it at home but you grew more and more impatient with each passing second. So, now here you were; positive pregnancy test in your hand. It was real. It was really happening. When realization hit you, you let out a squeal, there was no doubt Jesse would be just as happy.
And he truly was. And although he was sobbing when you broke the news to him, you knew it was tears of happiness. You cried with him as he held you, and you cried even harder when he got down on his knees and placed soft kisses on your stomach.
The pregnancy progressed as usual, with a bit of morning sickness - which in reality was more like, all day sickness. By now, you were nine weeks along.
It was Saturday, and both you and Jesse were home for the weekend. A rare occurrence, mostly because of your line of work and irregular schedules. Jesse rolled over with a lazy smile on his face, half awake, to pull you against him like he usually loved to do. But you were no where to be found, maybe you were preparing breakfast, he thought, and got up to go to the bathroom.
He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes, as he groggily made his way to the bathroom. He went to open the door, only to find it was locked. That was odd, you never locked it. Jesse's heart fell at the sound of your muffled groans and crying.
"Open up." his voice was gruff from the lack of use, he had just woken up after all. "Babe, please open up." he pleaded, as he kept on knocking.
"Go away!" you yelled through the door and cried harder.
"Let me in, you're scaring me." Jesse's voice trembled, as panic started to settle in a burning fire inside his chest.
You kept denying and he kept begging, until a deafening silence fell from your side of the door. Jesse defeatedly called out your name softly once more, and that's when he heard the soft click of the door unlocking. He pushed it open gently and found you curled up on the bathroom floor, weeping silently.
"Love, tell me." Jesse was almost certain he knew what had happened. Tears silently rolled down his cheeks, his lips pursed as he tried to make no sound.
"I lost it." And the moment those words slipped past your lips, a blood curdling scream echoed through the bathroom as you cried even harder. In seconds, Jesse was on the floor with you in his arms. And you cried, and you screamed until your voice gave out. "There was so much blood." you whispered.
Jesse cried silently, cradling your head, and placing soft, comforting kisses on your head.
"I know you probably don't wanna hear this, but" he paused. "Whenever you're ready, we'll try again. And we shall overcome, as we've done before." he reassured you.
For weeks on end, the both of you were nothing but just empty shells of yourselves. Mostly you. The first week you had stayed at home, wandering around the house like a ghost. One month after the miscarriage, you had smiled genuinely again, you were finding your old self again.
You both giggled as you stumbled in, and you turned around to hush him, before bursting into a fit of laughter again. Jesse hummed against your neck, leaving a trail of wet, sloppy kisses all the way down to your collarbone.
"Mhm, you smell so good." he slurred, moving to grope your ass through the loose fabric of your sundress.
It was only 3 P.M on a Sunday, and both of you were drunk of your asses after you had taken a curious Jesse for brunch and bottomless mimosas. He was always so confused as to how you managed to come home tipsy after brunch with the girls, and now he knew the why very well.
"You're sooo hot." you winked at him, or at least you tried to. "And I want you..." you grabbed the collar of his shirt and dragged him to the bedroom. Jesse just hummed appreciatively, and let you take the upper hand. You threw him on the bed and went on to straddle him and after that, everything was way too hazy to remember properly.
But you definitely had an idea of what happened, as you stared down at yet another positive pregnancy test. And although the months leading up to the birth of your daughter were rather difficult, it all got washed away the moment she locked eyes with you and Jesse. You guys shared teary smiles, life was well again.
The way it was supposed to be.
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neuroticboyfriend · 3 months ago
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Sometimes I wanna play a game but need something simple but interesting... So I wanted to share my favorite itch.io games (click the link if you don't wanna read the post, I'll update it as I play more!). Some of these games mean a lot to me and have helped me through rough spots. They're all free to play on your web browser <3
Six Cats Under by Team Bean Loop "A little point-and-click puzzle game where you rescue your herd of cats by directing them with your poltergeist powers."
Good Morning! by cnnmon "A short morning routine simulator about starting your day right. Play through a few colorful minigames and puzzles until you're ready to take on the day."
Lookouts by paranoidhawk *** "A romance visual novel about two gay trans masc outlaws in the old west, finding refuge in each other, and a little hope for a better life."
Goodnight Meowmie by DDRKirby *** "A narrative game combining elements of both the virtual pet and horror genres."
Goodbye Doggy by Picogram "A browser game made in HTML5. Help your family cope with your death as a ghostly dog!"
Soft Underbelly by Rosa *** "A browser narrative game made in HTML5. Take a break. Talk to your cat about friendship, trust & care."
Purrgatory by Niv *** "A visual novel about passing time in an afterlife where nothing really matters. explore a whimsical point-and-click world, befriend seven charming characters, and remember — furever's not so bad!"
B-e-e-t-l-e by Loafy Co. "A typing game minus the chaos and the anxiety. Type at your leisure and enjoy a chill, relaxing adventure filled with retro scenery."
Happy Cat Tavern by Courier Cat Studio "A cat themed typing game" -- tip: for calm playing, use practice mode! there is still a word & time counter though, you're not on any time limit or combo constraint <3
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Anyway that's all. Asterisk'd (***) are my top favs. Have fun, explore itch.io, and mind the trigger warnings where applicable <3
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springbudeyes · 3 months ago
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Please enjoy the first installment of a new series I'd like to call Gamemode 0!
If you're waiting for Mianite Season Four (ha), this will hopefully tide you over. Gamemode 0 is a highly produced mini-series that tells a story through text, dramatic audio narration, a musical score, and images. It stars a villain who was an edgy Grim Reaper in 2015 and it poses the question—how much has Kikoku Botan really changed since 2015?
That question will be answered over the course of – I'm guessing – seven-ish chapters? The first chapter, which you're about to read and hear, is based on a Minecraft RP session held in a single night. Those present for the session include World Historian's original writer (me) and a group of talented role-players. More info under the cut!
Here's the cast:
Moth @robotmothpie as Ginkgo Belshem
CloudF11 @silent-moons-camp as Cloud Endernatus
Metal @mx-metal as Omu Vulcan
Honor @cult-of-athar as Fateshaper (the Big Bad)
Matthew (me) as World Historian
(All characters are voiced by me.)
Background:
The project was Mianite Etherealis. We played on a private 1.12 server for two years, ending in early 2023. The chapter you're about to read (titled Session One) covers the RP session that brought World Historian into the narrative.
I would almost go so far as to say that you're about to experience a canon World Historian mini-series with implications for all World Historian content in existence.
Is it actually canon? I don't know. It's as authentic as you'll ever get for WH, that's for sure. I've spent the last nine years developing the cosmology being used here. I planted the seeds for it when I created World Historian in 2015.
But no, Gamemode 0 isn't Dec-and-Tom-approved canon. And my astounding co-writers aren't offical Mianite writers. And Etherealis isn't a piece of lost Mianite media, though you can think of it that way if you'd like.
Vision:
Gamemode 0 will follow the plot of Mianite Etherealis for one more session, then embark on its own original plot centered on World Historian.
That being said, my aim with Gamemode 0 is to dig up a piece of the past and link it to the future. This series is one of many projects that could result from that effort. If it sees enough support, it could grow beyond text, images, and audio. We have endless headroom here.
If you're looking for Botan's history in Ruxomar, you'll find it. If you're hoping for a glimpse into Akemi and Mina's lives, you'll get it. If you seek all manner of strange World Historian lore, consider it yours. If you just wanna sink your teeth into a juicy hunk of Mianite meat, go get a napkin, you menace.
We have plenty of chapters to take us from the past, to the future, and back again. I could just list the plain facts about World Historian in a lore post, but I could never be satisfied with that. I'm a storyteller.
Disclaimer:
The players own their characters. Most of the dialogue and actions in Session One come straight from the corresponding RP session. I'm just putting it all to a narrative and making readability tweaks for first-timers.
Shout-outs:
Happy birthday yesterday, Honor! We love you!! I guess this is one of your presents. Thanks for letting World Historian take over as the big scary dude for a session. And sorry for writing out our best boy, Oleander. We should co-write something someday.
Cloud, thanks for going back to our defunct Minecraft world to set everything up and take the awesome shadered screenshots for Session One. Also thanks for making c!Cloud such a great POV character. He carries Gamemode 0.
Thank you, Moth, for the un-shadered screenies, for being my PR person, and for supporting me generally all the time. PDA PDA aaaaa!
And thanks, Metal, for being the cool one. B)
Calls to action:
Mianitees, shower love upon my friends. I know Moth and Cloud would jump at the opportunity to answer asks about their passionately crafted OCs. And so would Honor and Metal, I suspect. With the right motivation, who knows what they could create?
The link will send you to my Substack blog, where you'll be able to read, listen, like, and subscribe to my newsletter. The paid subscription has no advantage over the free one; most of you will pick free, but if anyone would like to support me financially, that would be super appreciated. (If we get some traction with subs, I'll set up sub goals and a budget for upgrades to my production.) I plan to release Gamemode 0 chapters as frequently as I can, but I will post something to my Substack every month—Mianite related or not.
Also please like and reblog this Tumblr post if you dig it and want to see more.
Now go and enjoy your food.
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button-cat · 4 months ago
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uhggh I just wanna get this off my chest abt pressure
ever since the new update, the games been less enjoyable for me. Not just bc of the zerum drama, but also the painter. The autoturrets are quite difficult for someone who’s played doors and pressure since release
and then there’s Sebastian. Idk but the ring left a bad taste on my tongue bc pressure isn’t abt romance. Plus it doesn’t help that both zerum and simps have been whining abt the “marriage” constantly
I just miss when pressure was a fish doors game and there wasn’t this much shit surrounding a new fandom
Yeah i honestly do quite understand you- I didn't really know about Pressure before until the collab between Pressure and Regretevator which got me interested in the game but i do understand how upsetting it is when something like a game, show, etc you enjoy ends up getting a lot of controversy around it- i have experienced it many times before :(
I haven't played the new update yet (being busy with school and plus- i prefer to play on the days that I don't have school- :b) however i have seen it through videos and- for me the autoturrets seem pretty complicated to get through, (this is coming from someone who has beaten doors as well as other games that are hard-) plus i have seen a video where somehow the autoturrets managed to get rid a bunch of health to someone despite them hiding which- uh i don't think that's quite fair- ;D i know pressure is supposed to be a hard game but- from what i've seen, I don't really like the autoturrets either- :b
I have seen many people upset with the change to painter- personally, i like both versions of painter (the old and new one- :D) but I do understand why people are upset about it- the old one I can't really explain well but it definitely had some sort of charm to it that the new version doesn't quite have- but I do see why the devs wanted to change painter :D
And about the marriage thing- yeah I don't feel like the ring really quite fits- don't get me wrong it does look nice on Sebastian but I personally don't think it quite fits in like Sebastian's lore- as someone who absolutely loves reading the lore of characters, I personally don't like it when things end up contradicting each other in it- like i'm pretty sure when you get sent to prison they take everything but i MEAN EVERYTHING you have on you, even rings- and even if Sebastian was able to keep the ring in prison, I definitely doubt Urbanshade would let him keep it after- and also,,,the fact that he also um- grew a lot. I don't think the ring is gonna fit on him anymore- ;D this may be silly to some people for me to get upset about something like this but- idk i just genuinely don't like when things in lore just,,, doesn't make sense- this is just my opinion tho !
honestly i also find it quite ridiculous how much people as well as Zerum have been making the marriage thing such a huge deal- the way how some people get genuinely pissed about it is something that I find quite concerning but how Zerum acts about it is also something that I find pretty strange and iffy and maybe kinda,,,immature- some of her comments i did see it kinda condescending and just- not really an appropriate way to like- react, y'know? It actually concerns me honestly- :/
I just feel like many of these things, especially the controversy, could've been handled better- from what i'm seeing, it does seem Zeal is trying to improve himself as well as the game by recognizing things he's been doing wrong so- i do have some hope that things end up getting better in the end !! I really like Pressure and I wanna see it improve and continue growing since it's a pretty good game !! ^^ i do wanna make some posts about Pressure (i did plan making a post about Sebastian where i just put show some of my headcanons about him with some drawings :3) and just- have fun with posting about the game without so many controversy surrounding it- :b
also, if its really affecting you- I do recommend to not focus on the controversy and also maybe like- not interact with the community- like maybe take a break from it !! as someone who used to like- get involved with controversies in the past, it can be pretty unhealthy- in the end, focusing on all of the dramas and controversies in the internet and getting involved in it as well can end up just- stressing you out and maybe even just your mental health get worse- which is why i recommend to just sometimes distance yourself from the community and game if it gets too bad- and do things you enjoy doing ! I may not really know you anon but- please remember that your mental health is more important, okay? :D (this also goes to the rest of you !! Your mental health is more important- please take care of yourself !!)
that's mostly all i wanted to say- sorry for the very long response btw ;D im a very huge yapper sometimes even if i try to avoid being one lol-
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yelenasdiary · 2 years ago
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New Friend Request
Pairing: Gamer! Kate Bishop x Reader
Summary: After posting on a subreddit looking for people to play a new game with, you received a new friend request.  
| Comfort? | 0.8K | No Warnings | 
AC: Here is something a little different to my usual works! I hope you enjoy this, I found it pretty fun to write!
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It was Friday night, you had a weekend off from work and had planned to sit down with plenty of snacks and binge play a new video game you just treated yourself too. The only downside was that all your friends that you played video games with were either busy this weekend or had no interest in playing the new game you'd been waiting so long to play.
With a sigh and nerves kicking around in your stomach you decide to post on a subreddit asking if anybody else would like somebody to play with over the weekend. It wasn't something you'd done before but you liked playing games with friends more than playing solo.
Hours had past and your phone was left dry, not a single notification from anybody reacting to your post. Another sigh left your body as you tossed your phone to the side and decided to turn your PS4 off.
*DING*
(LuckyArrow has sent a friend request)
The notification stared at you deeply as the feeling of excitement and relief soon filled you. You punched in your passcode and quickly accepted the strangers friend request.
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LuckyArrow: Hey! are you still looking for somebody to play Dying Light 2 with? I saw your post on reddit! ☺️
yourusername: Hey, I am! I just thought the game and none of my friends want to play it with me 😩
LuckyArrow: agh! that sucks! I have a friend, Yelena, she doesn't play video games much and refuses to play with me! If you want, I'd love to play it with you. Have you played the first one?
yourusername: That would be great! Thanks! I'm assuming your user is LuckyArrow on PSN aswell? I have played the first, have you? Oh! btw, I'm Y/n!
LuckyArrow: Sure is! You have a cute name! I'm Kate, are you from New York?
yourusername: Oh wow! 😅 Don't take this the wrong way but I wasn't expecting you to be a girl! I actually just moved to NYC! Are you also from here?
LuckyArrow: You'd be surprised how many of us female gamers are out here ☺️ Where did you move from? if you don't mind me asking
yourusername: Just a small town that was hella boring! hence why I got into video games haha!
LuckyArrows: I hope you don't mind, I had a look at some of the game you play! You have good taste, how far are you into the story of Dying Light?
yourusername: Thanks! & not very far, I don't really like playing games solo most of the time. I've completed the first couple of missions though so I'm able to play co-op.
LuckyArrows: Awesome! Well, I have plenty of time tonight if you'd like to play now? If not, just let me know when you're free and we'll work something out ☺️
yourusername: Actually, I'm free all weekend so now would be great! Do you wanna play on my save or we can start one on your game? Whatever works ☺️
LuckyArrow: I've already completed it, let's just do a save on your game! Send me an invite x
LuckyArrow: Sorry about the x!!!! I'm just used to sending it to friends 😅😅
yourusername: Don't stress! it's okay ☺️ I'll send you an invite rn!
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Friday night soon faded into the early hours of Saturday morning, plenty of laughs and jokes were made between you and your new friend, Kate. You learnt a lot about her, you felt comfortable with her even though she technically is still a stranger online, you both planned to meet for pizza for lunch.
Who knew that a simple post online would lead to you making a new friend.
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2 months later
LuckyArrow: Hey! you free this weekend? sorry I couldn't play last weekend, I had a mission...I missed you though! 💜
yourusername: Hey!! Don't stress it, you get to actually kick some bad guys butts! it's pretty cool! I am free this weekend, I took work off, I need a break anyways. I missed you too, did your mission go well?
LuckyArrow: Meh, it was a pain (literally) but one less menace on the streets to deal with now! 💪🏼, I actually wanted to ask if you'd like to come over...I can order pizza and we can play video games or something, whatever you like! 😅
yourusername: Of course! it'll be so fun! Are you okay though? you seem a little off? x
LuckyArrow: I'm Fine ☺️ wanna come over Friday?
yourusername: Lock it in! Friday, date night haha!
LuckyArrow: Haha...😅
yourusername: Are you sure you're okay?
LuckyArrow: I'm not good this...but, I'm not asking you to just come over as a friend..😅
yourusername: Kate, are you asking me out on a date?
LuckyArrow: I am...we don't have to do something so causal, in fact I'd like to take you out on a real date but I don't want to scare you off or make things awkward between us..
yourusername: Oh thank god! Honeslty, I'm so glad you asked because I've really wanted to ask you out but I also didn't want to ruin anything
LuckyArrow: Well now that makes me feel a lot better! How about I pick you up at 6pm on Friday?
yourusername: it's a date! x
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Taglist: @red1culous | @bentleywolf29 | @kiwiana145  | @lissaaaa145 | @high--power | @parkerdaramitzzzz | @mmmmokdok |  @wackymcstupid | @kiwiana145  | @valiantmugcowboyscissors | @shin-conan-kun | @nattyolw | @ripofflizzie | @goofy-goonie | @makegoodchoices | @musicinourlips | @apollo2907 | @marvelfan98 | @wandaroman0ff | @dumb-fawkin-bitch | @lovelyy-moonlight | @santana1437 | @fluffyblanketgecko | @inluvwithfictionalwomen | @jaymieflorissssssss | @tita001 | @youralphawolf72 | @natashamaximoff69 | @a-dorkier-book-keeper | @hehehehannahthings | @blue-serendipityy | @secrettoallofyou | @romantic-slaps-on-the-asss | @marvel-fan-2021 | @mmmmokdok | @riveramorylunar | @ripofflizzie | @scarsw1fe | @toldthatdevil | @itsmv3 | @katiemay-025 | 
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synergysilhouette · 5 months ago
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Another 10 Disney hot takes/probably unpopular opinions
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Not a fan of Meg and Hercules as a couple. I ADORE them having an innocent male lead and a jaded female love interest, but Meg's situation with Hades makes it feel very toxic. The movie is kinda confusing on whether or not she can refuse Hades; one minute he uses incentive to get her to do what she wants (which is bad enough; her freedom for Hercules' death), and then when she tells him the deal's off, he reminds her that she has no say in the matter. Following this, she rejects his deal and he forces her into being exposed so Hercules will make a deal. She does sacrifice herself for him in the end, but it still feels very iffy for me, particularly since the backbone of her resisting him isn't even "I can't let this guy get killed" but instead "I don't wanna fall in love after getting my heart broken and having sold my soul" (which is EXTREMELY valid, but so is the other point). Had Meg been a normal human and made a deal with Hades to save Hercules or help him earlier on during his training, it'd be so much better.
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2. Disney needs needs to stop making sequels just because of financial success and actually work to craft a narrative that requires a sequel or two. It's risky (considering the first film could have negative critical or commercial success, as well as take time and resources away from other films at the studio), but would have a better payoff, imo. I enjoyed "Frozen 2" despite it's flaws, but the fact that it felt independent of the first film did make it feel like we could've used an entirely different cast and made the same story.
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3. I need more musicals with a male lead--The last one we had was "Tarzan"--or "Hercules," depending on your criteria. The revival era has had female leads for all their musicals, with a male playing as a co-lead or a deuteragonist. I know the girls are MUCH more valuable at Disney due to the Disney princess line and musicals with a male lead may be harder to market (well, not really; "Aladdin" and "The Lion King" were the highest-grossing animated films at one point, and their remakes grossed over $1 billion).
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4. "Moana" needed a bigger (main) roster--Something I love is a nice-sized amount of main characters in a movie. "Moana" only had Moana and Maui for most of the movie, and thus it wasn't as enjoyable for me in that respect. "Moana 2" is introducing new characters, so I hope they can hold my interest.
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5. Involve the Anderson-Lopez team in more musicals outside of the "Frozen" franchise--they almost got to do this with "Gigantic," but it fell through. Their music has been great, so I really hope to see them in more musicals for Disney outside of Disney's "Frozen."
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6. NEVER return to hybrid animation for a feature film--It's too disorienting for me personally, and while the animation for "Wish" wasn't bad, it definitely didn't have the storybook vibe it was going for except with backgrounds. It would look fine if it was a video game, though.
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7. "Gigantic" should've been Disney's anniversary film instead of "Wish"-- I already did a post on this, so I'll just leave it at that.
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8. Raya is one of the best Disney leads in a while--Granted, her movie could've been much better and I wish the color of her clothes reflected her culture instead of going for neutral colors, but Raya is the blueprint for a great protagonist. It's been mentioned before how she's a feminist icon without having to really show it in ways others have in films, by being a confident warrior with no discussion of marriage or gender inequality brought up in the film. She's also deliciously sassy and quick on her feet. I may have preferred her OG concept of being stoic, but her swagger makes her one of the more engaging Disney leads, particularly as the adorkable trait started to show up. Speaking of...
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9. Ariel and Mulan are the best adorkable leads for a Disney protagonist--While I don't have much issue with Anna and Mirabel and don't really find Rapunzel or Moana that adorkable, Ariel and Mulan were the blueprints for a funny female lead, and they felt less forced than later leads.
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10. Aladdin is one of the worst Disney princes--DON'T KILL ME! He used to be my favorite Disney prince, until I watched a "therapists react" video to Disney couples and they brought up the fact that Aladdin had lied to Jasmine several times over the course of the movie. Him being insecure is a great character trait (a common one with Disney leads since the 90s, really), but it's poor writing to make his romance with Jasmine be based on a lie. I'd rather he just kept tight-lipped about his identity when Jasmine caught him the first time rather than covering up with another lie.
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supercalime · 8 months ago
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i totally agree with the vast majority of what you posted about shayne and courtney and fans entitlement to their private lives. i dislike that the fandom so heavily sees things through a 'shipping' lens - angela and damien look at each other for more than three seconds, so here's fourteen fics about them fucking. like it's so deranged and so so strange and fundamentally unfair for everyone involved.
it is the same when people want them all to be best friends irl so bad it causes them genuine distress when they say 'we're just co-workers who have a good time'. i understand parasocial relationships and am aware that some are closer than others (some are married i've heard lol) but if it makes you want to keel over and die to hear arasha call courtney her co-worker...genuinely seek help, that's not good for you.
as someone who came back in the buy-back era and who was a fan at the height of the defy shourtney shipping era, i think it's okay to be like 'aww in videos i always thought they had chemistry!' but the stalking, obsessive stuff is unhealthy at best and wrong at worst.
i worry now about the hyper-focus that will be put on shayne and courtney in videos, both together and apart. i think it's super brave of them to go public (also something they may have felt they had to do, given public records) and i hope that people will be able to dial in to respect them and their relationship!!
Thank you, I feel like I’m going crazy, I’m glad others agree!
Bro I can’t even IMAGINE what the “fans” are going to act now. I mean, I can, and it doesn’t look good.
Im calling it now, if the “fans” will keep an even closer look on Courtney’s body now. They will try to prove a pregnancy and I think that will be worse than what it has already been. If there’s an actual pregnancy that somehow gets announced this year, how much you wanna bet that they will use the time Amanda mentioned a smosh baby to prove they were right and knew all along?
If this weren’t Shayne and Courtney, who had to endure stalkers, harassment, unwanted sexual advances from fans, fanfics written about them, people speculate their relationship by every single interaction they had at work, I would have just gone “omg, so cool! Good for them”, but this poor couple had to hide their relationship, hide an engagement! Courtney wasn’t able to wear a goddamn engagement ring, all to protect their privacy.
Im happy for them but again, heartbroken by the fandom once again.
Anyway, all these posts, fights and interactions made me resent the channel I’ve watched for more than a decade so quickly it was actually shocking. Which fucking sucks cause smosh has never been about romantic relationships and this news shouldn’t have affected the fandom for better or for worse.
Im gonna take a step back from the company, at least for now. I’ve unsubscribed to all the channels and unfollowed everyone. I hope I can get back to watching them but for now I legit feel icky, as stupid as it sounds.
I also learned my lesson for good, never ever interact with the rest of the smosh fans, it’s almost never worth it.
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gallus-rising · 2 months ago
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UGGGGH FINE. Give me your best mouth washing pitch I’m intrigued
OH BOY ok i'll try my best. this is kinda rambly and all over the place. i'm trying very hard not to spoil
first off here's the game blurb
The five crew members of the Tulpar are stranded in the empty reaches of space, shrouded in perpetual sunset. God is not watching.
and here's the top review on Steam which i think captures the Vibes really well
This feels like a trolley problem but there is no lever and there is no alternate track. you are simply watching a group of people suffer
game is first person PSX psychological horror in space, and i mean some real psychological horror shit. Pony Express long haul ship Tulpar gets stranded in space after an act of sabotage. you will run out of food several months before air. no one is coming. you bonce back and forth between Jimmy, co-pilot suddenly turned leader after a devastating ship failure, and Curly, former pilot turned crispy meat man after a devastating ship failure. the psycho-sexual tension between them is radical
the reason the game is called Mouthwashing is because it's revealed early on that the ship's highly important cargo? the thing you are under absolutely no circumstances to touch? something that needs a full 5 man crew monitoring it 'round the clock for a full year?? mouthwash. tons and tons and tons of mouthwash. this is the only thing the crew has to possibly supplement their diet, which i feel like really sets the tone. from there things go from bad to worse to worse to catastrophe to worse. just. the whole domino effect of how things collapse is one of the best i've ever seen
the characters aren't bad people (mostly >.>), they're just perfectly normal dudes just trying their best. the game then goes on to show what happens when a group of perfectly normal dudes are pushed to the absolute brink. what if you were trapped in an elevator with your coworkers who you only vaguely get along with. hell is other people. but also hell is yourself and how you're treating those other people. also i can't call them out for obvious spoiler reasons but multiple instances of characters just causally dropping a line that had me like. "oh. oh shit. OOOOOHHHH SHIT!!!!!" love it when something like that happens
people smarter than me are dissecting the Imagery and Symbolism in the game like crazy holy shit
ok i think that's as much plot stuff as i can get into without major spoilers (tho since i'm Mouthwashing Posting non-stop everyone here has already seen plenty of spoilers lol, but i feel like this game has a lot of stuff that makes fuck all sense outta context) ok gameplay stuff now
for reasons i'd need an entire separate post to explain Mouthwashing is the sort of story that can only be told via a video game. there's a lot of unique things about video games as a media that people are only really starting to dig into, so if you're even a little interested in that i recommend checking out the game on that alone. the story is told non-linearly to excellent effect, and if you're looking for some good unreliable narrator?? OH BOY!!!! 👌👌 i know the term "walking simulator" is typically used derogatorily but i fucking love a good walking sim. it is really, really hard to pull off a horror walking sim imo given the genre is sorta chill by nature, so that's also a feat of it's own. you are watching people suffer, you are undergoing suffering. it is a game that feels like it actively hates you for playing it because by playing it you have let all this happen
the game is about 2-and-a-half hours, only like 13$ on Steam, and will probably go on sale for Halloween. if you wanna watch a playthru tho (like how i discovered it lol) i highly rec Vinny Vinesauce's 👌
hhng i hope this is a suitable pitch and sorry for the ramble orz
[I HOPE IT HURTS]
this game is heavy so if needed spoiler/trigger warnings for:
as graphic violence as you can get with PSX graphics, alcoholism, starvation, some proper fucked up cannibalism, suicide, murder, referenced sexual assault, scopophbia, and the general hopelessness/claustrophobia/agoraphobia/sanity slippage you would expect from a space horror. all subject are handled tastefully imo. but yeah. it's a lot. if any of that seems like it'd be too much but you're still interested def give the playthru a shot
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not-goldy · 1 year ago
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I'm on a break but I had to jump in real quick on this
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Gonna ignore everything you said bout Jungkook- cos it's not necessary. You don't have to go there. He's my bias too so you can understand why I find it offensive when you guys make derogatory comments about him. Like I'm not gonna clap for you or side with you for putting dirt on his name like be fucking for real.
There's a difference between being objective, giving constructive criticism of a person and just plain hating on someone and I'm sorry if you like Jungkook a little bit some of these comments won't fly out of your mouth nor would you entertain them.
And if you wanna get sensible words out of me avoid the triggers is all I be saying. Don't trigger me and then act discombobulated when I act crazy.
But I like what you said about Jimin....
I've been applauding Jimin's supporters since face cos yall pulled your weight and got him where he and the company hadn't contemplated going- let's get that very straight.
I said in my previous post I don't think like crazy was created specifically for a western audience. Nor was it intended to be as huge as it was.
It wasn't even his lead single yet it's his number one single💀
PJMS did too much and got him a number one on BB. BB DID NOT SEE IT COMING. THEY WOULD HAVE MOVED THE GOAL POST I TELL YA.
Yall did too much pushing his tracks to the top of charts. Yall acted as if it was a BTS come back like calm down 🤭
PJMs are soo extra🤭
But don't stop you doing amazing sweetie
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They set the bar for Jimin to the high heavens. And we are hungry and wild for his success. It's cool but damn yalls appetite 🤭🤭🤭🤭
I don't think that is a bad thing. It just goes to show people are ready to support Jimin and take him to a level never seen before.
His next come back is gonna be 🔥 🔥
I mean the moment they got friends on a Marvel project I knew the Western industry thought he was on to something with his unique voice and all. Then they got him on Fast and Furious and lemme tell you that's some huge marks on his portfolio.
The portfolio this man is building is crazy!
I get all flustered and tingly thinking about what else he's gonna do and where he's gonna end up next in his career. He might have to move to Los Angeles soon cos he seem to have a place in Hollywood too the movie industry loves him🙂
If you wanna talk about the west then yea without a doubt, he is the one member who has a footing in with producers ready to work with him to make songs for their movies.
Fuck, I have a sense he's gonna cameo in a few Hollywood movies soon and he's gonna get booked to work on more soundtracks and OS for Hollywood. DAMN, IF THAT HAPPENS 😌😌😌😌😌😌
You guys need to relax, be patient and watch him.
Just watch him and don't jinx it up for him I swear to God! Yall be blocking your own blessings with unnecessary rants sometimes🙄
He's on the right track with his career. I genuinely believe that.
And I hope when he's finally ready with a predominantly English Album intended for the western market that hybe will move heaven and earth to give him the extra push and support he needs.
THEY BETTER COS WHEN I TELL YOU IT'S GONNA BE BLOODY UP IN THESE STREETS💀💀💀💀💀
And there's something about Jimin yall not realizing... those who know know.
I mean, Jimin even said it himself. he wanted an MV for every track and they shot him down....
EVERY TRACK....
THAT'S CRAZY.
And I know they shot him down, perhaps because they didn't think it was necessary for something they didn't intend to go all in on????
which is understandable but.....
We Libras are like that.
One time I set out to write a paper for a friends blog and it was supposed to be quick short and easy, but I decided to throw in a few references here and there to make it more academic and well researched- but I had to make sure it was accurate references so I hit the library. Before I knew it, I was calling up professors here and there and going all in I ended up with a 300 page dissertation and my friend couldn't use it for her blog so decided to keep it for her dissertation- so I told her I could work on a proper dissertation for her....
She said she was told she was too ambitious when she submitted it💀😬
When I get asked out for a spontaneous night out, I drive by the store to pick a new outfit and end up getting a pedicure manicure lashes silk press facials, bleach, exfoliate my butt- all for a girls night out.
Don't invite me for a sleep over cos this would be me- literally
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We don't do casual so well and always end up going the extra mile and over doing things.
Oh you're sad? Don't worry. A text won't do. I'll call to check on you, email you, make a blog for you, drive by your home in the middle of the night, move into your home, get married to you, have your children, dig my own grave and bury myself next to you cos I never know how much affection is enough 😭💀
I dare you to ask me a simple question- I'll go on and on and try to cover every base and every aspect. One lecturer told me, you are brilliant Goldy but learn to limit yourself and limit the scope when answering questions- yes, I was always the student who never finished a paper on time and always run out of time cos I had so much to say and everything I had to say felt important😭😭😭😭😭
If you listen to Jimin, it wasn't even intended for set me free to be as big as it turned out to be💀💀💀
As amazing of a voice as he has, he had to request for voice training just to make sure he was on track- when I tell yall, sometimes his "shortcomings" are all in his head bless his heart😭🥲
How many times did Jungkook and Yoongi say they had to reassure him he had a great singing voice and yet those were the times he kept insisting he wanted voice training😔
Sometimes we see flaws in ourselves others don't see. Most times those flaws are as imaginary as could be. And yet we obsess over those perceived flaws and even worse, we try to fix them....
If you're someone like that sometimes it may appear all everyone does around you is shoot you down and try to bring you down- but in reality, they'd just be the ones keeping you tethered so the perfectionist or dysmophia in you don't drive you over the edge.
Not saying Jimin struggles with dysmophia of all sorts..... but he lowkey give off vibes if you know what I mean💀
All these comments about him being the triple A guy when it comes to effort, the hyungs using him as inspiration to work hard, the whole Kpop industry making him out to be the "rookie Bible" lowkey stems from over ambitiousness and innate dissatisfaction with the barest minimum- but sometimes that's all that you need to do. The barest minimum.
It took me a while to understand this and feel comfortable with lecturers and people around me telling me I'm enough and don't need to do too much all the time to feel good enough or accomplished.
One time I scored a B+ on a paper, I cut myself for not working hard enough. After bleeding it out of my system I gathered the courage to confront the teacher only to find out she had my grades mixed with someone else's 😭😭😭😭💀
I spent so much time in the study room at boarding school people called me the study room freak and I kid you not I got an award for it😭😭😭😭😭😭
I'm much much better now and can let my grammar errors fly without feeling a need to read through my writings a gazillion times. It's the Marijuana but still. It feels good to not care about anything anymore 😌
He's said he's working on his perfectionism and isn't consumed by it anymore but lowkey lowkey- we love him regardless 😭😭😭😭😭😭
Bottom line, we shouldn't confuse what happened with Face with what's happening with Jungkook.
Jimin's entanglement with the West wasn't intended at all in my opinion. It just happened. He had had Vibe and I think they just rode on the waves of the publicity from that for Set me free and Later like Crazy.
Thus he made more money spending less on advertising and marketing- comparatively speaking.
Then you have the youngest who had to sacrifice and go last after everyone- bare in mind who ever went first with their Solo had the most organic publicity because it was a new phase and all attention was on BTS since they announced a hiatus and going solo.
With little effort, that person was guaranteed to back some coins 🪙
The one to go last is relatively disadvantaged because he loses that organic attention and would require a lot of publicity to sell- but if he happens to be Jungkook then they would need to do just a little lifting because again- Golden Maknae. But imagine if Hobi were to go last- like some of yall wouldn't even care at all lets be honest which is not fair to Hobi but also the sad reality.
If I were Jungkook or Tae I wouldn't agree to go last at all don't give a fuck it's everyone for themselves💀
See this is why I wanted them all to release their albums at once. Hybe would be over stretched but then everyone would shut the fuck up. 😒
It may appear to most that the company didn't put in much effort to promote Jimin and- I understand these sentiments. I do. I just don't think it's a fair objective assessment of the situation💀
It's easy to say this wasn't treated well or that wasn't treated well when all you focused on is your bias. And I think sometimes equity prevails over equality because in as much as some went ahead of others, some already had kicked started their publicity with other collabs, some had been allotted more of the spending budget, some had high productions or low productions, they all can't get equal treatment.
Jungkook's launch is very much deliberate and well strategized too for the last debut. They took the lessons from the others launch and are trying to cover every base. He went last and so Hybe just had to make sure he went out with a bang. It be like that.
Every has to bag their coins somehow and that's all that matters.
Now that phase one is done. I can't wait to find out what they have install for phase two- I hope it's not gonna be crickets cos they all in Jail or military or whatever 😭💀
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zaebeecee · 5 months ago
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Hi Zae! Okay, so like ... I'm only saying this because it's been on my mind for a while ... And I just saw something, and it just hit me, and I'm on anon because like, I just have something to confess and it has something to do with Hazbin Hotel's voice cast and it's kinda harsh and I don't want people to think I'm mean, but like ... okay. So? That whole like sketch about "How Allosexuals treat Alastor" and your post about "Allosexuals breaking in and knocking over the plants? I can't stop thinking about it because I've felt like this is *EXACTLY* how Alastor's own (Allosexual) voice actors tend to treat him and talk about him though? And like, they maybe even set a precedent for this behavior? And it's annoying? Like, I love Amir but one thing I will say in Bosco's favor is that Bosco seemed to lean into to the "fan service" aspect a bit more than Amir does and I even noticed that like, um okay so like, in the little clip that goes around of Blake discovering RadioDust for the first time, Amir just kinda gives off this little "disappointed parent oh no no face"? Like he doesn't even wanna entertain the thought? But then he kind of gives in and is like "okay, I guess...:" when other cast members started talking positively about it, but he originally looked for a split second like he was about to scold someone or give a little lecture or something and to me that was just like: "My guy, I love you but at least Half of this fandom was built on RadioDust fanservice for the past five years, know your history! What are you doing???" Anyway, what I'm getting at is that sometimes, when I see the "allosexual breaking into your house and knocking over plants post, I want to reblog it and just be like "This is Amir Talai, though." And then I feel sort of bad. Should I feel bad? I don't think I can watch any Hazbin Hotel Cast clips on youtube without being lowkey annoyed anymore. Like, of course I still love them but I don't know...
Oof. Yeah, my friend, I totally get where you’re coming from. And this is just my personal opinion/reflection on the topic, but I feel like this is a case (with Amir personally) of having absolutely zero fandom experience of any kind before taking on the role that he did, as well as what happens when an allo who knows nothing about being ace tries to stay true to an ace character.
tl;dr because I kind of tend to ramble: I really think all we can do is speculate, since we don’t actually know Amir; but also, I don’t think you should feel bad about having a negative reaction to an allosexual speaking over ace people about an ace character, even if he is the voice actor and seems to be a decent person.
First off: no. I don’t think you should feel bad about looking at that and going “Amir Talai though”. It’s the energy he’s putting off, and it’s not your fault that it’s his actions that are pulling that response out of you.
I think Amir has, ultimately, good intentions when it comes to portraying Alastor as accurately as possible. But judging by his past tweeting and the (admittedly hilarious) list of things he’s had to Google since becoming Alastor’s voice, it’s very clear that he does NOT understand what fandom is all about. And he does seem to genuinely be trying! The Zoom call with Blake is particularly telling for all of them, because Amir was very “oh fuck” and Blake was very “OMG DID YOU KNOW THIS WAS AN OPTION??? :D” when, like you said, RadioDust kept the HH fandom alive for four years. Clearly, none of them actually dove into the fandom prior to the project, and I’m hoping that further exposure to the fans might help. As long as they’re not the same as the “we’re going to bully Joel Perez because we hate Valentino” people.
(Also, on Amir’s reaction there, I have no idea if it was “but Alastor is asexual and shipping him is BAD” or if it was “Blake what are you doing bringing this up now people are gonna get mad”, which… with certain people, particularly that very mean vocal minority in the HuskerDust community, is a valid concern. But he and Blake seem extremely close, so I’m not sure Blake would have put him on the spot publicly if he knew Amir would have a genuine negative reaction. But idk, this is all speculation on people I’ve only seen in panels and stuff like that.)
With Amir being allo… I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, because he has publicly apologized for misrepresenting Alastor’s ace spectrum in the past which does suggest that he’s listening to people, but it’s really on him to actually talk to asexual people so he has examples of real experience to draw from. So many people think that asexual automatically means sex repulsed and aromantic automatically means romance repulsed, and because of that, I can understand why Amir came into this with those assumptions. But since he IS so dedicated to the fans and he genuinely loves playing Alastor and wants to be as true as possible to him, he needs to stop looking at asexuality from an allosexual perspective. I haven’t seen anything at all recent from him on the subject, so his perspective could have changed?
But I don’t think you should feel bad about having a negative reaction to the way he’s choosing to react to ships. He is speaking over ace people, whether he realizes that he’s doing that or not, and that isn’t okay. And honestly, having that negative reaction is a good way to call attention to the problem, because if he knows the ace umbrella community has a problem with his black and white perspective on this, I think he’s more likely to listen to us. If part of your hesitation is that you like Amir (which, admittedly, is part of mine), it’s genuinely okay to like a voice actor in general and still be mad at them/criticize them for an aspect of their character interpretation, because ultimately Alastor is our representation, not his. And it matters more if a demisexual/grayaro wants to depict Alastor as their type of aspec than how an allosexual thinks asexuality should be.
On a related note, my husband and I are taking a RadioDust cosplay to a convention later this year, and both Amir and Blake are going to be there, so we’re hopeful we can tell both of them that we’re both aroace spectrum, married, and huge devotees of the ship (both because we’d like to help reinforce the fact that Blake himself is on board the ship and because Amir desperately needs help). idk if it’ll do anything but maybe it’ll at least get him thinking more critically about it.
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crowandmousewritingco · 4 months ago
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Facing The Monster Head On (Pt. 2)
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Part 1
Pairing: Dieter Bravo x trans!Actor!reader
Words: 2.6k
Rating: PG-13, like part 1, there is no explicit bits. There are insinuation(s). Honestly if there was a rating between PG-13 and R, that's what this fic would be.
Summary: You're the co-star of an upcoming movie, Cliff Beasts 6. You're starring next to the -questionable- star, Dieter Bravo. Shooting the scenes was the easy part. The not-so-easy part? Dieter's habits.
Author: Mod Crow (I really need to get better at writing and posting)
Author's Note(s): As before, this was originally supposed to be a single part, but I love this slightly gremlin like man. The story used the prompt list for @thepromptfoundry's July prompt list.
Warnings: Language, hints at rated-R thoughts, mentions of drugs and drug use, mentions of addiction, mentions of parental death, reader gets misgendered, and -not a bad warning- plot twist (maybe?)
Info on PTSD: Here
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You don’t know how long you sat there on the floor, head buried in your knees, but by the time you lifted your head someone was knocking on the door. There was a part of you that just wanted the person to keep knocking, maybe they’d get the message that you weren’t going to be opening the door anytime soon. That was until you heard them talk.
“Hey, look I didn’t mean to make you cry. Can I come in or something to properly apologize to you?” The knocking stopped for a moment, was he just going to stand there and keep knocking? God you only hoped not, you didn’t want to explain to this big Hollywood actor why him asking you for drugs sent you spirling. 
Groaning softly you forced yourself to your feet. Once up right, you run your hands through your short hair, taking a shaky breath in, you turn to face the door. Did you really want to open the door? It would be so easy to just turn around and hide yourself under the thick comforter that rested on the hotel bed.
“If you don’t wanna talk I get that, but I will get Ronjon to come by if you don’t at least tell me you’re alive.” Then a couple more knocks rang out. Closing your eyes you couldn’t help but want to chuckle at the thought of Dieter going to Ronjon and trying to convince him that you needed to be checked on.
Grabbing the door knob with one hand, you used your other hand to unlock the chain lock. Pulling the door open, you locked eyes with Dieter, that hungry look was still there, it would always be there. Though this time it wasn’t pure hunger, his eyes looked softer, almost as if he was…
“Are you worried about me? You don’t even know me.” Pulling the door open further you leaned on the doorframe, your knees weren’t quite ready to support your body but you couldn’t have stayed on the floor and opened the door. 
Watching him reach up to scratch the back of his neck, “Look I can't have people thinking that I enjoy making people cry. How do you think my PR team would handle something like that?” You couldn’t help but scoff at his remark, so the worry in his eyes isn’t over you, it’s over his public image, typical actor. 
“I’m fine, thanks for checking in on me. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have stuff that I would like to get done.” Without offering a ‘bye’ you closed the door without letting him say another word. Locking the door, you could hear him mumble something, then you heard the familiar sound of footsteps growing more and more quiet. Turning to the bed you look at it for a moment. You could hear the bed, it was practically calling out to you. Walking over to the mattress you could feel the exhaustion of the evening set in. At the feeling of your knees bumping into the bed you sighed softly and started to strip yourself of your day wear. Removing your dress pants last, you could feel the chill of the room on your warm skin, causing chill to run down your spine and goosebumps to break out across your skin. 
Climbing into the bed, you were quick to slide under the covers. Under the covers however, weren’t much better than the cold air of the room. Grabbing the remote off the bedside table, you pointed it to the TV and switched it on, not caring what was on. You just needed sound, anything other than the deafening silence and ringing in your ears. You flipped through the channels for only a moment, before deciding on some documentary on sea coral. 
Setting the remote back down on the bedside table, you flipped the lamp off. Letting your hand rest against the pillow. Closing your eyes you couldn’t help but replay the last twenty minutes on repeat in your head. Finally slipping into sleep’s grasp, your body relaxed under the covers.
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“Okay can you walk us through what happened one more time, Miss?” You don’t know how many times you’ve told the detectives the story, or how many times you’ve had to correct them. Squeezing your eyes shut, you take in a shaky breath.
“For the last time, I’m a man, a boy, He/Him. How many times do I need to say it?” Opening your blood-shot eyes you look at both of the older men sitting in front of you. Watching as one raised their hands, almost as if to say, ‘hey no need to get angry’. 
“Sorry about that…sir. We’re older, that whole changing your gender is still confusing to us.” The older of the two said, he said his name was Detective Derfner. Looking to the other, -Detective Mauller- he gave a half-assed apologetic shrug. Sighing you rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.
“Why not have an detective or someone like that who could atleast show me a little fucking respect. I found my mom dead tonight and instead of being comforted or with my family, I’m in here because you think I had something to do with it. I’ve told you this same story every time you ask. Right before I went upstairs, my mom and her new boyfriend thing -Travis- had been fighting. No, I don’t know what the arguing about. By the time I finally gave up trying to stay down there it was around eleven thirty or midnight. I don’t know what time I finally managed to fall asleep, but I jolted awake just about three thirty AM. No, I don't remember what my dream was about. 
When I finally got out of my bed, I noticed how quiet the house was. I assumed that meant that they had either made up and got to bed or that he had left and my mom had fallen asleep either on the couch or if she went to her room. As I made my way through the halls, I could kind of hear the TV in the living room. I thought that she had passed out on the couch, so I was going to go wake her up so she wouldn’t get a kink in her neck or mess her back up. When I got to the doorway of the living room, I could see her slumped over slightly. I thought it was some kind of joke, so I kept telling her that it wasn’t funny. I walked towards her to shake her awake, but when I got close enough to see the table I had seen…there were pill bottles. I didn’t count them, but there were like four, maybe five. Two of them were completely empty, I know for a fact that one of the bottles had her name on it and the other was mine. My mom was prescribed lexapro after my dad’s mom and then my dad died. 
I was prescribed Prozac after my dad’s death, I didn’t know my grandma too well. She lived in Washington state practically my whole life. I didn't check the other bottles. I couldn’t. I couldn’t bring myself to see if my mom had taken every single pill. So, sorry I couldn’t and still can’t help you there.” Chewing the inside of your cheek, you reached out and grabbed two more tissues. Drying your, once again, tear wettened face, you look between the detectives. The older of the two was taking a couple of notes, while the other seemed to be looking over his notes.
Watching as Detective Derfner looked up from his notes, he pulled a few pictures out from behind his writing pad, “Thank you. Now, we took some pictures of the other three bottles. Two were prescribed to a mister Travis Byrd, who you know as your mother’s boyfriend.” You looked at the two pictures of the pill bottles that had Travis’ name on them, “The third name is a name that we couldn’t find in your mother’s phone, nor have you mentioned the name. But that third bottle is prescribed to a mister Fransisco Mor-’
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The hushed, yet rapid sound of knocking pulled you from your restless sleep. Propping yourself up on your elbows, you looked to the alarm clock, switching the bedside lamp on. Sighing at the time, you push your half naked self out of bed, bringing the bed’s massive comforter with you as a cover. Wrapping the comforter around your shoulders, you held it closed with your left hand as your right one reached for the locks of the door.
Once unlocked, you pulled the door open. Without even seeing it it was first you closed your eyes and pinched the bridge of your nose.
“What? It’s like one o’clock in the morning, what could you possibly wa-” Dropping your hand and opening your eyes, you see who decided that now was a great time to bother someone, Dieter Bravo. As the two of you stood there, the only sound for a moment was the soft sound of the TV on in your room. Scanning over Dieter you can tell that he has yet  to go to sleep, or maybe he just woke up? He looked about as rough as you felt at this moment. 
Without talking, Dieter gently shoved past you. Turning to watch as he walked into your room, you let go of the door, allowing it to shut at its own pace. Following behind him, you stop next to the floor length mirror. You watched as he sat on your bed, making himself comfortable. Continuing to watch, you watched as Dieter took off his signature sunglasses, and looked at you. You couldn’t pull your eyes from his, the dark coffee color of his eyes holding your attention. Swallowing dryly, you held the comforter tighter around your body, “C-Can I help you? You did kind of wake me up, you know that right?”
Without responding at first, Dieter stuck up one of his hands, as if to tell you to stop talking. Scoffing softly, you roll your eyes, “Well excuse me for talking. Please do talk, your highness.” You gave Dieter an over dramatic bow. As you stood up right, you heard him chuckle softly before finally talking.
“Look sorry about making you cry or whatever earlier. I came here because I would like to know, would you like to have sex with me?” Leaning back slightly, you can’t help but stare at him for a moment. Was this grown man offering sex as an apology, or does he not know how to talk to people like a normal human?
Reaching up, you pinch the bridge of your nose. “Maybe it’s because you woke me up and I’m still half asleep, but Dieter, I’ll be one hundred percent honest with you. I have wanted to fuck you for the last five years or so. Right now however, I do not want to fuck you.” Dropping your hand and opening your eyes, you study his face. Locking eyes with him once again you recognized something about the gleam in his eyes. He seemed to have that same hunger in his eyes from earlier, though this time he was looking at you with that look. Dieter was practically undressing you with his eyes. 
Shaking your head you walk towards him, “I’m not fucking you tonight. You are more than welcome to stay, but no fucking is going to happen.” As you finished talking, you could see Dieter slump slightly, he looked like a child in a candy shop who just got told no. Without talking, you watched as he stood from your bed, and replaced his sunglasses.
“Well, when you finally come around to it. You know where my room is.” Reaching into his robe pocket, he fishes around the pocket for a moment before pulling his hand from the pocket. Between his index and middle finger he held a small plastic bag, the contents of which looked all too familiar, coke. As that thought entered your brain you felt something in you take over.
Dropping the comforter that was hiding your bare chest and legs to the ground, you quickly closed the distance between the two of you. Reaching out, you snatched the small dime bag from his fingers. You didn’t notice the smirk on his face as he spoke, you simply heard him. “It’s nice to see I’ve found someone who also enjoys a little…pep in their step.” 
Staring at the bag in your hand, you felt your mouth run dry. Without thinking, the thoughts that entered your brain made a pipeline straight to your mouth. “I’ve been clean for two years tomorrow.” Walking past him, you sat on the edge of your own bed, your glazed over eyes finding his face before continuing on. “I started just after my mom died, I found the guy who she had gotten some of her pills from, turns out he was also one who enjoyed a little pep. I spent two and half years with him. That was until he lost control of his truck while we were both high. He didn’t die, but I did. Twice actually.”
Eyes dropping to the bag, you toy with the opening, “Dying is an incredibly sobering experience, that doesn’t mean the want isn’t still there. And tonight has been the loudest it's been in a while.” Chuckling sadly, you look up to Dieter before clenching your jaw a few times. 
Clearing your throat, you stand from the bed. Feeling the cool air of the room on your warm body makes you shiver. Looking down you finally register why you coil feel the cold air of the room. Staring at your scarred chest, you tuck both hands under your armpits. Quickly looking back at Dieter you try to talk, “You weren’t supposed…No one on the crew…Darren doesn’t…”
Raising both of his hands this time, you stumble over your words till they stop coming out of your mouth. Clearing his throat, Dieter closes the small distance between the two of you. Something about him changed, he seemed…worried again. Before you could start apologizing for making him worry, you felt his warm hands on your biceps. 
“Kid calm down. Would it help if I also removed some of my clothes?” Dumbfounded by his question, you knit your brows together, “Why would that help me right now? I already told you I’m not fu-” Before you could finish your sentence, you watched as Dieter removed his robe, before removing his own shirt.
Once the older male stood bare chested, you stood there. You couldn’t help but stare at the man’s chest. Dropping your hands, you hesitantly reached out. When your fingers just barely hovered over Dieter’s chest, looking at his face, your own features were painted with a questioning look. Seeing him nod, you carefully laid your fingers on the fading scar that stretched across the entirety of his chest. 
“You’re also…you’ve had top surgery?” The questioning look on your face now morphed into a look of a mix of awe and curiosity. How could an actor who you were into be trans without you -let alone the rest of the world- knowing? Your eyes falling to his chest once more, your fingers still running across his chest. You didn’t talk, you didn’t know what else to say or ask the man.
“I had top surgery probably six or seven years ago. When I starred in the first Cliff Beast movie, I had only had the surgery several months beforehand.” Feeling a chuckle rumble through his chest, you couldn’t help but gently press your whole hand on his chest. Where your hand had stopped also allowed you to feel Dieter’s pounding heart. Looking from his chest to his eyes, you could feel your heart pick up its pace, soon matching Dieter’s. Closing your eyes, you clenched and unclenched your jaw for a moment. Shaking your head, you opened your eyes and softly removed your hand from his chest.
“I didn’t know, though I don’t think anyone else knew either. That being said, sex is still off the table. The invitation to stay though is still open.” You crossed your arms over your chest, not to hide your own exposed top surgery scar, but in an attempt to warm up. As you stood there you kept your eyes on Dieter, and just before you could open your mouth to talk, you watched as he started moving around your hotel room.
“I don’t really want to stay if I’m not getting the fuck out of it,” You couldn’t help but feel your heart clench a bit, you had really thought the whole thing from only moments ago would be enough to make him change his mind. Nodding, you went to acknowledge his words, gaze falling to the floor. Licking your dry lips, you opened your mouth, but before you had a chance to talk, he continued on. “That being said, I am willing to stay till you fall back asleep…or whatever.” 
Eyes snapping back to Dieter you saw that he was now holding the comforter, “Wh-Why? I was fine just before you were here.” You wanted to come across as strong, but your voice portrayed you. Clearing your throat you tried again, “I mean, I was fine before. I was able to fall asleep and I stayed asleep. That was until someone decided to wake me up by knocking on my door.” Sitting on the edge of your bed, you heard him chuckle.
“You know, for someone who says they were doing okay, you were pretty pale and sweaty. Now, I wasn’t in your head while you were asleep, but if I know anything, to me that looked like you were either having a nightmare, night terror, or an anxiety inducing dream. Do tell me, am I close?” Seeing the play smirk on his face as he walked to the other side of your bed and tossed the comforter on before climbing on next. “Now come lay down so I can go back to my room, we have an early day tomorrow. At least I think I remember Gunther saying that the busy day was tomorrow.” You watched as he shrugged, you couldn’t help but chuckle.
“Fine, but only because I’m tired.” Crawling to your spot you got comfortable once again, grabbed some of the comforter and covered yourself. Turning the lamp off, you rolled onto your back, “Good night I guess.” Dieter was silent for a moment, had he fallen asleep already? 
“Good night to you too.” Hearing him respond you nodded softly to yourself and closed your eyes. Sleep had found you easily once again, this time however, your sleep wasn’t plagued with unpleasant dreams. Your dreams were now simply happy childhood memories, back before things had gotten confusing and hard.
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The sound of the hotel’s alarm clock pulled you from your sleep. Blindly you reach over and feel around for the clock. When your fingers finally found the alarm clock, they were quick to hit the alarm’s off button. Eyes still closed, you lay there in bed for a moment, enjoying the warmth and weight of the comforter. As you laid there a realization hit you, the comforter wasn’t this heavy. The comforter also didn’t snore softly before.
Opening your eyes, you see where the sound of snores is coming from. Dieter. He was asleep next to you, and it was obvious that the alarm clock didn’t bother him at all. You knew you should be waking him up, but there was something about this moment that you never wanted it to end. Smiling to yourself, you decided an extra ten minutes wouldn’t hurt anyone. Closing your eyes once more, you carefully snuggled closer to Dieter. You could already tell that the sleep that was going to take you this time, was going to be a gentle and wonderful sleep. Who knows, maybe your brain will decide to treat you to some…rather fun dreams.
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